The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 155 - John Pemberton's Drug Tonics

Episode Date: February 27, 2016

Comedians Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds examine the life and creations of John Pemberton. SOURCESTOUR DATES REDBUBBLE MERCH

When you're staying at an Airbnb you might be like me wondering could my place be an Airbnb and if it could what could it earn? You could be sitting on an Airbnb and not even know it. That in-law sweet guest house where your parents stay only part-time Airbnb it and make some money the rest of the year whether you could use a little extra money to cover some bills or for something a little more fun. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.ca slash host. You're listening to the dollar each week I do a story from American history to

my friend Garrett Reynolds. Who has no idea what the topic's gonna be about? Okay all right. I don't even know. It's the battle of funny versus prudent. And I think funny wins. Do you want to look who to do? People say this is funny. Not Gary Gara. Dave okay. Someone or something is tickling people.

And this is not going to come to Tickly Quadcast. Okay. You are Queen Fakie of Haight-Up Town. All hail Queen Shit of Liesville. A bunch of religious virgins go to mingle. And do what? Pray. I want to thank all of our subscribers at Patreon. This podcast is brought to you by

our subscribers. We thank each and every one of you who donate you help us a lot because this podcast is a lot of work. You're the wind beneath our podcast wings. You are the wind beneath the pod. You have a stunning voice. Thank you. I was a young Mariah Carey. That's interesting. My buddy opened for Mariah Carey for 12 shows. Never met her.

Seriously? Yeah. That's amazing. I was like what was she like? He goes I don't fucking know. I know. I never saw her. She didn't give a fuck.

Well, she's very insulated shockingly. But who keeps you so close to say fucking hi to the guy open for you? Oh. Absolutely. Monster. Yeah. Well, January 8th, 1831. I mean, it's already out of the park.

John Stith Pemberton was born in Knoxville, Georgia. His father was James Clifford Pemberton. Pemberton grew up and went to local schools in Rome, north of Atlanta. He studied herbal medicine and pharmacy at the Southern Botanical Medical College at 17. Then in 1850, when he was 19, he received a license to practice on Thompsonian or Botanic principles. Okay. Okay.

Herbal remedies. Yeah. Now, Thompsonian medicine was based on the works of Samuel Thompson. He believed, quote, fevers nature's effort to throw off disease and therefore ought to be treated as a friend and not as an enemy, as is the practice of physicians. Okay. Not the worst idea considering the time, though. No.

I mean, fevers do exist for a reason. Well, no. And actually, most antibiotics do come from nature. I think I like what this guy's doing. If someone is staring at you and you just kind of unravel. Yeah. No. I think you're supposed to think things like that.

Thompsonian treatments involve steam baths. So someone has a fever. I'm already in, baby. Spa day? Yeah. No, you have a fever of 103 and then a dude puts you in a steam room. Put me in the steam room. Cool me down, baby.

How about a hot tub? Your arm hurts. Let's kick your arm. He would give herbal remedies like bayberry, hemlock, witch hazel, raspberry, water, lily, rosemary, ginger, and cayenne pepper. These were all supposed to, quote, hold heat in the stomach or induce vomiting. Okay. Which is the opposite of things.

Right. Is the, okay. It's really going to make you hot in the tummy or make you vomit. You're going to get really sick from our cure. Pemberton practiced medicine at first in Rome, Georgia. Then he, where he performed a few eye surgeries. I don't, that's all it said. That's all it said.

That's, that, that was the whole thing that I. I'm going to go ahead and be on rec. I don't think that's good. I think any eye surgery performed in 1830 was fucking horrific. I imagine it's just taking out the eye. That's all I can think of that. Even then, I, I can add them out there and just be like, well, your ears gone. What's next?

No, his eye. Oh shit. Oh. Hey. Gotta take your eye out. Who's just you? Let me get my thumb in there deep. But me foot hats.

We're taking the eye out. Don't worry. You've got troll lives in your eye. Makes your foot ache. Where's me spoon? Got to put a little ginger in there now. Here we are. And now I'm going to eat the ginger.

You're better. Thanks for coming to monsters. Next, he moved to Columbus, Georgia. At this point, Thompsonian medicine was no longer popular. So it was, you know, it had a little fizzle flare up. When he was at Columbus, he met his soon to be wife and Eliza Clifford Lewis. Everyone called her Cliff. Sure.

That's what you want your wife to be called. Hey, me Cliff. Hi. Hey. I've got a vagina. They got hitched in 1853 and soon had their first and it turns out only child. His name was Charles. They called him Charlie.

Charlie. Since Thompsonian medicine was no longer the way to go, Pemberton started a wholesale retail drug business that specialized in substances used in the composition of chemical remedies. Okay. And to help, he got a, he got a graduate degree in pharmacy, which I don't know what that met in 1831. You know, you go to CVS university, got a pharmacy degree. Right.

This was when the wing bang boom. The, this, the first ride in pharmacy college opened up. That's right. Right. Right. RAU. His business was somewhat successful and he went through several partners over the next 10 years.

Then the U.S. Civil War broke out in 1861. Good times. Pemberton's uncle, John C. Pemberton was a respected soldier who had fought in the seminal in American, Mexican American wars and was now a general for the Confederacy. So Pemberton decided to join and fight with the South. He helped organize a group of older men in Columbus and was said to have served with distinction. Yeah.

Pemberton earned the rank of lieutenant colonel in the third Georgia Calvary battalion. His uncle played an important part in the war being defeated and surrendering during the critical siege of Pittsburgh. Okay. So, yeah. So he's good shit. Yeah. The South surrendered on April 9, 1865.

The war was over. And what's good is people will find they let it go pretty easy. Yep. No grudges help. Unfortunately, telegraph lines had been destroyed during the war and word of surrender had not gotten back to the boys in Columbus. Okay. Union general in charge, James Wilson, led an attack on the city.

On April 16, seven days after the end of the war, Pemberton was engaged in a sword fight on horseback. He was slashed with a sword across his torso and then shot. Oh my God. He did recover from his wounds, but his recovery included using morphine as pain medicine. Yeah. The use of morphine was incredibly common at the time and Pemberton, like many, became a morphine addict.

Perfect. Everyone was using it. So many soldiers were addicted to morphine due to their injuries that morphine addiction became known as the soldier's disease. Oh, shit. All right. Estimates say as many as 400,000 vets were addicts. That's a lot.

That is a lot. That's a lot of dudes. Yeah. That's a lot of morphine. Yeah. That is a lot of fucking morphine. Morphine. I got it.

I wish it hadn't happened. Sure. But I got it. We all feel like that. Well, now we all feel like morphine addicts. Thank you. Because of that joke. All right.

Let it go. It's hard to figure out. They wore a leather strap and a small bag around their necks. Like St. Bernard junkies. Inside they had morphine in the needle. Around their necks? I don't know. I don't know why.

I think he's starting to use morphine. Yeah. Well, he's got a bag around his neck. It's exactly what I'm saying. It's a telltale. Imagine if that's what the heroin addicts did today. Just carried around a sack on their neck. Be great.

Hey, look at junkie at the bank. Look at you. Look at you with your little morphine pouch. From a medical journal at the time, quote, no plan of medication that has been so carelessly used and thoroughly abused and no therapeutic discovery that has been so great a blessing and so great a curse to mankind than the hypodermic injection of morphine. So people, I mean, people are just junking it up in the streets and wherever. Anyway, I mean, it's just 400,000 people for this time is a shitload of people.

Yeah, wow. Yeah, everyone's just junking it up all over the place. Junking it up is actually also a show that I host. It's also a band. Is it? Junking it up really good. They're good. Yeah.

They play a lot of bottles. After the war, morphine man Pemberton returned to work at his pharmacy. So he's now, oh, Jesus. What? What? Wait. He's all he's junking it up. Yeah, he's on morphine.

And he's a pharmacy. Fuck yeah, he is. All pharmacies have access. I got everything. Yeah, but at this point, morphine is totally legal. You just grab that shit. Right. Anywhere.

You can go on any, any, any safe way. It's gum. Ralph's and just be like, Hey, man, I want some also pack of morphine mustard and ticks of morphine, these pickles and the morphine. Oh, and some tampons. Oh, my wife. After the war. So he opens a pharmacy.

They didn't have tampons, right? You know what? That's a that's a history subject. I don't want to get into. I don't know what's happening. I'm sure it was just a fucking nightmare. I mean, it's, it's, it's a nightmare now. Right?

I don't know how many friends he just made, but well, no, I mean, but I know I'm not talking about like the dudes to nightmare for the dudes, but I mean, in general, it's like you cope. Like I don't ever, there's never a woman who's like, Oh, thank you. Yay. Well, that's true. Actually, I've actually said that before you did thank fucking God. What a weird week this has been.

You know, it'd be worse if it was the 1830s. Oh God. Then we'd have to use drapes. So he developed, they are just, at his pharmacy, he developed patent medicines. Okay. These were big at the time. There were many guys offering many types of cures with their concoctions, although they pretty much all use the same ingredients, vegetable extracts with a lot of oil and some

morphine. Right. Well, do you need the vegetable extract? Well, there were no regulations at the time, so these mixtures could easily lead to death. Good. Like bath salts. Right. There was no proof that they were effective, but they were openly sold and claimed all

sorts of cures. The drug makers said their fixtures could cure venereal disease, tuberculosis, colic indigestion, female complaints, and even cancer. Okay. What? Female complaints? You got to talk about female complaints. No, cancer, female complaints.

We're all looking for a cure. You heard my tampon rant earlier. Okay. Can you do the dishes just once? Oh, God. You know what? Take this. Oh.

Do whatever you like, honey. There we go. That's where I need her. That's what I'm talking about. Docile. That's a good girl. She's a good girl. Cough medicine usually contained morphine.

There was an anti-diarrhea medicine called Dr. Fowler's Strawberry and Peppermint Mixture. Dr. Fowler's? Dr. Fowler's Strawberry and Peppermint Mixture. And a cured diarrhea? Yeah. These are stuff really loose boom-booms. Which? The doctor came by and gave you your boom-boom medicine.

They contained 15% alcohol and one-fifth of a grain of morphine per fluid ounce. A grain is literally like a grain of wheat. That's the measurement. Okay. So a nice challenge. Per fluid ounce, one-fifth of a grain. That's morphine. Yeah.

There were also- And also you inject this diarrhea medication. Oh yeah. Shoot into your eyeballs. Shoot it through your cock. There were also Bateman's drops that cured rheumatism, pains, hysterias, gallstones, gout, jaundice, and respiratory problems. It's a lot of the- And it really all is just doing the same thing, right? Which is just numbing you.

It's fucking horseshit. The mixture, that mixture had a 48.9% alcohol and 1.9 grains of opium per ounce. So that's just shit-faced material. You were supposed to give two drops to a child who was two days old. What? What do you mean what? What do you mean? You can't be junking it up in babies.

Five drops for a five-day-old baby. Five? What? Well, okay, here's something. What? Your two-day-old child is going to be five days old soon. Okay. So it sounds like a bad first fucking week.

Ten-year-olds would get half a teaspoon. Ten-day-olds? Ten-year-olds. Ten-year-olds would get half a teaspoon. Oh, these are days or years? No, I was doing days before. And now a ten-year-old gets a- A ten-year-old gets a- yeah, half a teaspoon. That's a lot of- for a kid, that's a lot of actual-

Just cuz? Actually, a lot of morphine. Just cuz. Yeah. Right. She's like, man, I give- I give my baby five drops of this stuff and just- he is just solid at that. He's not- I mean, he- He's so great.

He's so great. Honestly, go look at him in his room. He's sleeping like a dead body. Just laying right on the floor. He's been in there for seven months. Just laying on the floor. I mean- Great medicine. I really recommend it.

Once he gets up, I'm gonna teach him how to read. Next, Pemberton moved to Atlanta, became a partner in the firm Pemberton Wilson, Taylor, and Company in 1870. Their manufacturing lab had $35,000 worth of the latest equipment. It was written about in the- Imagine seeing that latest equipment now and be like, guys, this is pathetic. Great beaker, bro. It was written about in the Atlanta Constitution, quote, a magnificent establishment, one of

the most splendid chemical laboratories that there is in the country. It was onward and upward. Two years later, he became a trustee of the Atlanta Medical College. Then he started a pharmaceutical business in Philadelphia and started cranking out his stuff en masse. Now, remember, he's still a fucking morphine addict. Some of those patented medicines, Dr. Sanford's great invigorator. For banging.

Eureka oil. For banging. Indian queer hair dye. Okay, banging. Triplex liver pills. Drunk banging. Gingerine. Red headed banging.

And lemon and oil and orange elixir. Nice little drink. And the greatest liver medicine in the world. That doesn't he already have a liver medicine on the market? He just stopped. He just stopped like trying. I'm out doing myself. He was like, this is just the best stuff ever.

Sure. But it was not to be. In 1872, he filed for bankruptcy. One of his creditors said he was, quote, honorable and industrious but lacks good management. He also had no ability to save money and constantly gave it away to family and friends. And to top it off, there were two business fires. One in 1874 and another in 1878. In the second fire, he lost 20,000 of his stock.

Only half was recovered by insurance. But he continued on with his career in 1881. He served on the state first state examining board to license pharmacists in Georgia. Okay. Oh boy, the gardeners are here. Wacking those. But even more financial ruin was around the corner in 1883. He came down with an unknown illness.

Not good at that time to have an unknown illness. Yeah. But also a morphine addict, can we know that unknown illness might just be morphine addict? No. Give him some morphine. That's what you do. He had taken on a new partner, local businessman, Asa Candler. Somehow Pemberton lost all of his lab equipment and stock of drugs to Candler while he was

ill. Pemberton called Candler, quote, predatory. So Candler took the ship. Yeah. He just took everything and fucking bailed. Pemberton was said to have been left in utter ruin. The 1880s were the time of industrialization, and with that came more and more work and frantic lifestyles.

George Beard coined the term Neurostena, Neurostenia, fuck, I looked it up before. We still use it today. Neurostenia. It was a disease of the time with neurotic psychosomatic, particularly amongst the upper class. So it's fucking in your head. It's like Aflamazza. Psychosomatic symptoms, it's, you're, yeah, but it's also, I mean, it can't meet you.

It's probably anxiety. It's probably a bunch of different shit, right? Well, look, when you got all that money, stressful, right? That led to nerve tonics like Huxley's nerve vigor. God, I, I want to go back to this time and just drink these things to have nerve tonic. Well, if you're anxious and someone gives you morphine, yeah, it's fucking awesome. You're not, you're not anxious anymore. Not different at all from today.

No. We just have better fucking drugs. We have much better drugs. They're also Dr. Hammond's nerve and brain tablets. Well, I'm just going to take a brain tablet and go to bed. Huh? Yeah, I've had some nerve tonic and I got rid of my diarrhea with some raspberry lemonade and now I'm just going to have a brain tablet call it a night.

Advertising on patent medicines exploded. Mike Jacobs Oil, a anti-neurologic tincture that was made of turpentine, ether, and alcohol. Holy shit. Spent 500,000 annually on ads. What is turpentine? Turpentine, ether, and alcohol. I mean, that is a very deadly combination. Girl, you never had turpentine?

Turpentine, girl, you want to shout to turpentine? Make you feel turpified. Turpified. Turpentine, this turpentine. I don't know if I would use the term turpentine. Turpentine. And you just call everyone a saint. A saint.

Hey. A saint, David. Yeah, I'm not seeing that. You can't hear him whacking those weeds? Maybe a little bit, but I think it's okay. So did the W.T. Hansen company spend a lot on advertising for their quote, pink pills for pale people? Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, man. Yeah. That is some good shit right there. Wipe these tears away for a minute, that really hit me good. Pink pills for pale people? I guess it makes you not pale.

There's no, first of all, there's no way it works, but just terrific. Clocks, calendars, pens, almanacs, pocket knives, matchbooks, and mirrors were given away with patent medicine ads printed on them. Pretty much exactly what happens today. Tons of so many pens and shit. Just want a pink pill, so bad. I know, right? Don't you want a pink pill for a pill?

I'm English. I need one. Yeah, you do need one. I burn. Can't be out long. My lines were clear cut and giant billboards were propped up, but money was the god of the time. Quote, most Americans are willing to put up with fraud and hype in the name of individual

rights and democracy, particularly if there is money to be made. Hey, hey, welcome to our game plan forever. So nothing's different. Even a scoundrel was admirable if he was rich enough, but it was still a rough game. Only about 2% of these drug mixtures had any success. So people are just cranking them all out. Yeah, but nothing's working. It's not, they're not working, they're just not catching on.

Like weight loss pills. Even the ones that didn't work, you know, some of them became very successful. Just because? Because the word of mouth or whatever. And also because they would, you would drug you. Yeah. So you wouldn't make you fucking high as shit. So you'd be like, hey, it's good.

It's good. I don't know if the brain tablets work as well as they say they do, but all I know, what was I talking about? I felt really coffee. My head was funny, but then I took this and now I'm like, I'm the floor of my, she's just, I sound like Bill Cosby. She took too many brain tablets and now she's what the doctors call causing out. This is great.

She's causing out right now. Um, I mean, Sotoata was sold in drug stores and some also made claims of curative powers. Just, that's great. I mean, why wouldn't you? Uh, yeah, the make it taller. There was the moxie nerve food, which was a top. You could get that in a soda shop. This was the war on nerves.

That said it cured insomnia, nervousness, softening of the brain. It cured softening of the brain or soft. It cured softening of the brain. Yeah. It would make your brain less soft. Like if your brain, hard to fight them, if hard to fight them, your brain was over them wrong. It also cured paralysis.

That's a hard one. It seems like, it seems like it probably caused paralysis. That's a hard one to prove that, yeah, I mean, you would give it to some of the paralysis and they wouldn't get up and you'd be like, Oh, you need more or what? How would that work? Like that's really simple one to, like there's one, you, that means you just take it once. You get one, one drinking. You're like, this didn't work.

Oh, he's jogging. Now. Yeah. Yeah. Also, there was hires root beer, which we still have hires hires hir yes, I don't know it. You haven't seen it. Oh, it might be gone now, but it was around maybe 20 years ago.

That claimed it had 16 wild roots and berries to purify the blood and make rosy cheeks. Hey, for those people whose pink pale pills aren't working, the tonics are sometimes mixed with hard liquor. Love it because your health nuts and then came cocaine. In 1884, an Austrian doctor said he had been able to anesthetize the surface of the human eye using a solution of cocaine hydrochloride that had been taken from Peruvian cocoa leaves. So he really did find cocaine. Yeah.

It was actual cocaine and he put it in someone's eye. But didn't it, but it did. It was effective. Right? I mean, like, did it help numb? Are they using a leaf blower? Yeah, he's using a leaf blower. Look at these guys.

Oh, I didn't know you use Gilberto's. That's all right. Those are our gardeners. Gilberto's. You know, if you guys need gardening help, Gilberto's is the official gardeners of the Dollar podcast. Gilberto's. We wear bandanas over our faces.

He brought cocaine. He basically brought cocaine back and was like, yeah, you can not anesthetize. He discovered it. And he told everybody. And then medical researchers in Europe and the United States jumped on the new anesthetic and began to use it in surgery. Right. Immediately.

Everyone started checking out what cocaine could do. Sigmund Freud. Sounds like Studio 54. Sigmund Freud wrote, quote, a song of praise to this medical substance, a song, a song of praise, meaning that he just sings its praises. He didn't write a song. He wrote a song of praise. That was what he.

But that's it. He didn't write it. Are you saying he wrote a song? No, he didn't. He could have. But he was so high on cocaine. He could have. Well, they just say you've got some pain in your brain.

Just try a little bit of cocaine. We found this whole joy full of songs. And the Freud dances aren't they beautiful? Look at them. We found a whole joy full of Freud songs to cocaine. That's right. That's right. Cocaine began to be used as a treatment for drug addiction.

Well, alcoholism, depression, well, I'll tell you, in my experience with cocaine, it's it's always cured. All those things. It does do that. You get. You feel rested and you don't want to drink. You feel fine. Little cocaine.

I've never done. I wouldn't know. Never. I've never done any drugs. Me either. Just one year after the. I haven't either. Just one year after the Austrian doctor's discovery, cocaine was being used everywhere.

It was now everywhere in the U.S. 1855 was a year of quote coca mania. They still hold that in San Jose. Cocaine was using patent medicines, ointments, sprays, hypodermic injections, suppositories for hemorrhoids. Now, when I heard that, when I read that, I was like, that's fucking awesome. Yeah. Why can't that still be a thing? Were you if you have a bad painful hemorrhoid?

Yeah. You just fucking stick some cocaine in your butt. Yeah. Well, the problem is your butt doesn't shut up, keeps telling you fucking stories that goes nowhere. And then this other toilet I was at this one time, I go, Jesus, but shut the fuck up. But what? So really though, if you think about it, like, so you have this sort of self-fulfilling,

like people are using cocaine to cure things and cocaine makes you think crazy thoughts. So you're like, I don't want to cure it. Cocaine. Cocaine cures everything. It's just a little cocaine. It'd be fine. You know, I actually came up with another cure. Could you imagine this era?

So if everyone's fucking using cocaine, it sounds like everyone's fucking taking it. Right. Can you imagine how horrendous that the horrendous business ideas that came out of the time and just the endless ideas that were garb, like just everyone in the country is just coming up with just terrible fucking, hey, man, let's make a change store. Hey, man, let's put birds on our hats. Like, yes, bingo. So there were many ads also.

Burnets cocaine for the hair. Oh, my God. Cures dandruff, soothes all irritation for the scalp, makes the hair grow, and gives a beautiful luster. You know, I'll be honest. What doesn't cocaine on your head do? It'd be amazing. Your whole girl head does numb.

Cocaine tooth drops, instantaneous cure for children. You know, my friend who's done cocaine says that when it hits your nose, you go very numb. Oh, really? Yeah. That makes sense. Coca-Bola, a cocaine chewing paste, was sold for 50 cents a pouch. Oh, my God. And then there was cocaine wine.

Vin Mariani was a tonic and patent medicine made from Bordeaux wine and coca leaves. Now that had been around since 1863 in France. But when Americans started cranking out cocaine wine, the guy who created it in France, Angelo Mariani, was not impressed. He said American imitators made, quote, worthless so-called coca drinks that are nothing more than solutions of cocaine in inferior grades of wine, shamefully prepared by unscrupulous or ignorant persons who are bringing discredit to a really useful drug. So he's a French guy.

Yeah, he's very, he's like, I'm a coca-malier. You down there, you. You fucking pigs. You know, you'd take so much more than just putting grapes in a bottle with cocaine. We're just basically. And we made like Bud Lightly Merida. Right. Exactly.

Yeah. Americans were just putting cocaine in his shitty wine, which just made the wine taste bitter, but got people high. Why, why can't we still have cocaine wine? Come on, we're all grownups here. Come on. The world's falling apart. Yeah.

Let's just have some coke. What's it do? Can I just say let's go out drinking cocaine wine? You can say it. Yeah. Yeah. Mariani's wine had seven milligrams of cocaine per dose dose. I don't know.

I guess glass. Right. Well, so medical, some American cocoa wines had 35 to 70 milligrams of cocaine. Let's see. So American. Yeah. But you know what? Hey, sorry, Frenchie.

We did it better. He's like, I like it. So we need to use the perfect amount gives you a small happy feeling. I know, actually, if you just put a bunch of it in the bottle and shake it up, then you can pound it. Hey, I can't see my eyes. That means the wine's working. It was recommended one should take a wine glass three to four times a day.

This is a great era. This is a great era. Someone was happening. Everybody could just do cocaine. Some wine brand said kids should only get half that dose. Oh, fucking narks. Quacks. Pemberton was in on the wine and coca from one of his ads in 1885.

The most successful tonic of the age, Pemberton's French wine, coca recommended by 20,000 imminent physicians for I love that this now this is a guy on blow making an ad. Yes, like 20,000 people love it. They fucking love it. Like 20,000 guys. They just take all the time. You just take it. Just keep taking it.

I'm going to go for a jog. No, you just came back from jogging. We have a lot to do. Let's jog again. Stop moving your mouth. I can't stop taking medicine. Your mouth looks like Billy Idol's living in your mouth. So much medicine to take.

Is it medicine? I don't know. I'm going to run. Okay. It was for the cure of all nervous afflictions. Okay. That's the best. Yeah.

Cocaine take the nerves down. All. Yeah. That's true. We've all seen the end of Goodfellas. You know how cocaine makes you stress less. It is pleasant to take it will prove itself beyond price. French wine coca strengthens and exhilarates coca, a wonderful invigorator of the genital

organs and removes all physical and mental exhaustion. I mean, sign me up for this one. This one gets your fucking genital organs all. Okay. Yeah. They really have to keep out doing each other. Yeah. Right.

Not only will. Okay. Now it'll make your dick hard and all your problems go away. Your vagina gets puffy. What? Don't help. Very. It will also cure physical and mental exhaustion.

The best known remedy for morphine and opium habits. Imagine. That's just the greatest. Sick headache, neuralgia, wakefulness, loss of memory, nervous tremors, melancholy, etc. Sold by Pemberton and Gresham, sole proprietors. God. Another ad. Cocoa wine is a delightful tonic, regulates the bowels, liver and kidneys to perfection

and is quote, a boon to suffering humanity. I mean, really ambitious stuff. Yeah. You'll ship more and the world's problems will go away. If you feel out of sorts, blue or melancholy, a few doses of Pemberton French cocoa wine will make you well and happy. Under its influence, all things in nature seem to be at work for your good. And this is all very true about cocaine and you'll experience a feeling of indescribable

ease, contentment and satisfaction. Oh man. Also, you're going to be an asshole to your friends. Cocoa is the most wonderful invigorator of all the sexual organs and will cure seminal weakness, impenetra, etc. while all other remedies fail. Fuck yes. Fuck yes. It's a happy dick drink.

It's just the best. That basically said everything. Listen, drink this wine every day and all your problems go away. Cocoa wine. But there was pushback. From who? Right. Against everyone, including children from taking cocaine in all forms.

What? Atlanta. You're telling me kids can't do cocaine? The Atlantic Constitution wrote a critical article of cocaine and said that people would soon be demanding a remedy for the cocaine habit. Pemberton. Pemberton responded with his own article, quote, it is perfectly wonderful. Cocoa does.

It is the very best substitute for morphine. It's applied as he knows. It supplies that the place of that drug curing the patient of addiction without inconvenience or pain. We Americans are a great army of nervous and invulins. Sure, a little cocaine will put that fire out. What a thing to write. Yeah.

Fucking. Look, we're just fucking awful. We're all okay. Look, Americans are a fucking mess. He's coked out of his tits. Cocoa promotes robust health, tremendous physical and mental activity and long life. I wish it were in my power to substitute coca and compel all who were addicted to the use of opium, morphine, alcohol, tobacco, or other narcotic stimulants to live on the coca

plant. Yeah. So he's pushing that ship. Fuck yeah. The temperance movement had been gaining steam in the 1800s and by November of 1885, the Atlantic Council voted to end the drinking of alcohol beginning on July 1st, 1886. Wait, end the drinking of alcohol. Oh, so pro.

Okay. Right. So permanent started working on a new French wine coca that did not have wine in it. That's amazing to be like, well, we've got to eliminate alcohol. Keep the cocaine. But blow is perfect. It was fine. He makes different food favors and oil citrus flavors and added sugar.

He kept tinkering with it. He's making Coke food. Calling it a temper, temper and drink. Down the street at Jacobs Pharmacy, the soda counter would do test runs from. At some point, he settled on a formula. He had taken on two partners, Frank Robinson and David Doe. They were advertising men and had come up with a new color printing device, but no one really was interested in the color ads.

So the men sat down to come up with a name for the new temperance drink. Other similar tonic at the time were botonic blood bomb. I don't think I would take that one. Definitely a round of those Copeland's cholera cure catchy Pierce's pleasant purgative pellets. I love how alliteration was the key. That was ad wizardry. Are you, are you, are you sensing a, a sort of pattern? Yes.

Goff's giant globules and Radway's ready relief. Goff, Goff, Goff's, Goff's, G-O-F-F, Goff's, they're not even using alliteration right at Goff's. Robinson made a suggestion, Coca-Cola, which was. That's right. This is cornflakes all over again, which was basically just the name of the two main ingredients. Then they made the first ad, Coca-Cola syrup and extract for soda water and other carbonated beverages.

This intellectual beverage and temperance drink contains the valuable tonic and nerve stimulant properties of the cocoa plant and colon nuts and makes not only a delicious exhilarating, refreshing and invigorating beverage, but a valuable brain tonic and a cure for all nervous affections, sick headache, neuralgia, hysteria, melancholy, et cetera. The peculiar flavor of the Coca-Cola delights every palate. It is dispensed from the soda fountain in the same manner as any of the fruit syrups. P.S. Pemberton, chemist and sole proprietor. It sold decently in Atlanta.

Pemberton went back to his lab and back to coming up with other medicines. P.S. Pemberton took over the production and advertising of Coca-Cola, the 14 Georgia soda fountain served Coca-Cola in that year. Now Prohibition had officially kicked off in July in 1886 in Atlanta, but it seemed it wasn't really enforced because you could still buy stuff like Duffy's pure malt whiskey for medicinal use. So good. Hey, I need some medicine, you got any of that whiskey back there?

Yeah, take a shot of medicine. Here you guys, I'm serving medicine. Oh boy. I'm gonna need some more medicine. Yeah, yeah. Take another rip of that medicine. Keep lining them up. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Pemberton was selling about 720 bottles a day of French wine cocoa, which he now called a temperance drink. So he just renamed his wine saying- Who's enforcing this Prohibition? Nobody. It also had increased powers according to him. Ads now said people lived for over 120, 130, 140, even 150 years old by drinking it. So there was no, like nobody was in charge of advertising bullshit at this point. There's absolutely no one in charge.

This is- You'll live to be 140, your dick's never been harder. This is the free market without regulation. Yeah. Prohibition was not long for the world in Atlanta. Just 10 months after it started, it was over. People wanted to drink and clearly they weren't being able to stop it. David Doe left the Coca-Cola business, so one of his partners is out and new partners came in, pharmacist M.P. Alexander and Wolfolk Walker.

Walker would be the salesman of Coca-Cola and also young Charlie Pemberton started working at the company again, though he wasn't now so young. He was 33 years old. Charlie was now known for his- But he drinks Coca-Cola, so he's gonna, I mean, he's like an eighth of the way through his life. Charlie was now known for his hard drinking and womanizing. Oh, right. On June 6th, Pemberton applied for a patent for Coca-Cola and he was granted it on June

28th and his name only. Prick. Pemberton fell ill, again, as he did before. Yeah. Yeah. Then 11- What do you think it's from? I can't imagine. Then 11- That healthy lifestyle he's been living, at the last-

It's morphine and blown for a second. Then 11 days later, Pemberton sold two-thirds of his Coca-Cola rights to a soda fountain owner named Willis Venable and George Lones, who was an old friend. Pemberton got $1,201. Of that, $1,200 was an interest-free loan which would come out of his future profits from the one-third of the company he had left. What? He basically sold it all for a dollar.

Okay. And a loan. Great. Pemberton also sold all his equipment and supplies that he used to make Coca-Cola as well as a copy of the formula. Well, now he's- What are you doing? Well, he's a drug addict.

I mean, he's acting erratically, David. Why? Yeah, you want the formula? Yeah. Will you give me the formula? Sure. You need the formula? No.

Okay. Well, how about a dollar? Sure. How about a dollar? Okay. Isn't it worth a lot? I don't know. I'm gonna go get a soda.

Later. Weirdo. Now, there were also the two guys who had come to the company, right? The guys we just talked about. Alexander Walker. Right. New partners. Yeah.

When they heard about the sale- Soon. That was when they learned that Pemberton had secured the patent in his name only. Oh, right. Even though they were part- Right. Business partners. So, one pulled out of the business and took his investment and went back to Tennessee

the next day. Now, Robinson and Walker were accusing Pemberton of conspiracy to ruin the business. What Robinson didn't know was that Alexander had left because Pemberton had put the patent in his name. So, there's another- So, you didn't say anything? There's another that's different. We're talking about-

Yeah. There are several guys now involved in the business. So, there's Alexander and Walker who came in late. And then there was Robinson and Doe who were the two advertising guys who came in. Right. So, Robinson was the seller. So, you had those four guys. Four.

And then- So, one of them left. Right. And I believe Doe might have left by now just taken off because he thought it was bullshit. So, now you have Robinson and Walker and- Pemberton. So, now Alexander leaves and this is when Robinson finds- Robinson doesn't know that Pemberton has sold off or put the patent in his name and then

sold it off. So- But that's why Walker left. Yeah. So, Walker just didn't even say anything. Right. Right. Cool dude.

So, two weeks later, Pemberton told Robinson he'd gotten a patent for Coca-Cola as the sole owner and then had sold two-thirds of the rights. And he was like- He said- Any more good news, asshole? What? I can't believe what I went into fucking business with a cocaine morphine addict that this wouldn't work out.

He's making weird decisions. Now, Robinson- It's like he's not all there. Now, Robinson's furious. He consulted with a lawyer, John Candler. Oh, Candler. Now, John Candler is the brother of Asa Candler, the guy who had, when Pemberton fell ill, taken all the equipment.

Oh, right. Okay. So, he wanted Candler to see if he didn't think he could have our rights. He goes over there to see if he has a case and he's like, yeah, I actually bought all that equipment off that guy for two bucks. Yeah. My brother sold it to me. Yeah.

So, Candler goes to see Pemberton, who is now bedridden, and Pemberton tells Candler that his partners were mistaken, quote, they have got no interest in Coca-Cola, whatever. I have done what they say, but I never did give them any rights in it. I don't make much difference, though, even if they did have the rights, I don't know how you would get any money out of me. So he's basically saying they don't have the rights, and even if they did, I ain't got no cash. So.

I'm a drug addict. Things are good. Candler then passed on the case. This has been the shareholders meeting. Candler then passed on the case because there was no money in it. Now, remember, there are two other partners that he brought in, Lownes and Venable. Okay. And they had been made partners to promote Coke, but they didn't want to promote Coke

now. Venable sold his shares to Lowdence, who then sold his shares to Walker, and a new investor, Mrs. Dozier. Okay. Venable then sold the rest of his shares to Joseph Jacobs of Jacobs Pharmacy, which is the first place that served Coca-Cola. Okay. Venable and Lownes also left the equipment and stock in the basement of Jacobs Pharmacy.

Okay. So Jacobs is making Coca-Cola at his soda fountain, and Pemberton is supposed to get a royalty of 5% per gallon of Coke made. Right. But Pemberton starts bothering Jacobs for advances on sales. Jesus Christ. He's just a fucking street junkie. Hey, man.

How many gallons they take? Huh? Come on. Give me a cup of that gallon. I'm talking about future gallon earnings. You're probably going to sell it. You're probably going to sell like 10 gallons. Come on.

Come on. I'll suck your dick for a piece of that gallon. Come on, man. Fuck it. Give me the fucking money. Coke dick. Coke dick. Coke dick.

Come on. Come on, dude. Come on. That just, that's the story of the beginning of Coca-Cola. Just some guy blowing another guy up. Come on. You suck your dick for this gallon. Jacobs was not pleased.

In October, 1887, Pemberton put an ad in the Atlantic Constitution paper, wanted an acceptable party with 20,000 to purchase one half interest in a very profitable and well-established manufacturing business, absolutely no risk, and guaranteed 50% profit on investment. Three new investors stepped up and each paid 20,000 for one half interest in Coca-Cola. Pemberton failed to mention to the three new investors that he had already sold off two thirds of Coca-Cola. He's really. He's got like.

Shady. I mean, if we're counting, he's got, I think he's got. A lot of investors. I think he's got nine investors. Slowly, slowly made offing. Robinson still wants justice. So he contacts Asa Candler, who five years before had managed to swindle Pemberton out of everything.

Right. So this is the brother of him. Yeah. Asa then put his sights on Coca-Cola. First, he contacted Jacobs, who complained about Pemberton always hitting him up for money. He offered to trade his Coca-Cola rights for stock in a glass company. Okay.

So this is like, all right, check it out. I'll take your Coca-Cola rights, I'll give you stock in this glass company, and you're good to go. You got Pemberton out of your hair. So Jacobs agrees. He's like, great, as long as fucking junky Pemberton goes away. The next week, the glass factory burned down. Jesus.

It was not insured. Oh God. Pemberton's new investors formed the Pemberton Medicine Company with him. All rights to manufacturer's products were given to the new business. The partners immediately began making lemon and orange elixir, Coca-Cola, and other medicines. They had no idea the rights to Coca-Cola had been sent sold off. This is, it's got to be nerve wracking if you're Pemberton a little bit. Oh my God.

Gary just wants to get high. Then Charlie Pemberton showed up. Oh boy. He demanded that he run the manufacturing of Coca-Cola. His dad delayed making that call while Charlie went about, quote, throwing tantrums, boozing, and weedling. I don't know what weedling is. I think it's what your gardeners are doing.

I looked it up. I looked it up. I can't remember. A couple of weeks went by. Then Pemberton told his new partners that he had signed the rights over to Charlie. So. Some time ago. Oh, to Charlie?

Yeah. Jesus Christ. Yeah, to Charlie. But he had forgotten because he was high on morphine because I was quitting cocaine at the time. So listen, you guys, just some bad news, and they, you three each gave me 20 grand. What the fuck is happening? Okay.

So I said, I said that my son Charlie could have all the rights to everything, but here's the deal. Here's the deal. You sold. No, no, no, here's the deal. Not my fault because I was on heroin. Okay. I'm really, you know what I mean?

I was high. Look at me. I was high on my fucking mind. Yeah. No, I. I was in business. Right. But I don't remember.

Yeah. That's why it's not my fault. Why don't you remember? I saw on heroin. Yeah. Okay. All right. Well.

I saw on morphine. Okay. You guys want to get some coke? No. You should not be doing any more cocaine and stop selling the company to everybody. By the way, I want you to meet some new partners. God damn it. Meanwhile, Candler incorporated the Coca-Cola company with Charlie, right?

So now, Asa Candler, the guy who fucked his dad out of money. Yeah. He's now partnering up with his son. Right. And a man who still had some shares worn as partners. So this other guy's got shares amount. Within months, Asa Candler bought out Charlie for $500. Then he bought almost all of Walker's steak.

Walker then hit the road selling. Candler must be really glad he met the Pembertons. Right? Yeah. Candler. Walker then hit the road selling Coca-Cola around the south and Robinson would be the guy manufacturing it while Asa owns most of the company. Right.

So Candler didn't then commit to his partners that Coca-Cola was trademarked, but the formula was not. This meant they could make imitations. Right. So now, so now he doesn't own, he doesn't own the company. He doesn't own the company. He doesn't own the rights. But he's going to make the same thing.

Just call it something else. That's, that's, that's what he's, so now he's got these guys who invest so much money. He's like, Hey, that's like a new idea. We're going to make it. Just cause something else. But we already make the goddamn thing. No, we're going to make it stop competing with the business you sold us, you motherfucker. You can make it more.

Damn it. This is, this is, this should be this, this origin story of Coca-Cola is the, is the ultimate description of cocaine use. So they tried cranking out what they called first yum yum and then Coke, K-O-K-E. They did not catch on. Then one of the partners walked away on August 16th, 1888, while John, on August 16th, 1888, John Pemberton died at the age of 57 of stomach cancer. His obituary read, he was the oldest drugist in Atlanta and one of the best known citizens.

An especially popular gentleman, Asa Kanler paid Dr. Pemberton, Dr. Pemberton, a beautiful tribute of respect, speaking of his lovable nature and many virtues. He voiced, he said, the feelings of all present that our profession has lost a good and active member. Asa Kanler even served as Paul Bearer. One of the business partners said, quote, Dr. Pemberton was in bad health. We did not know what was the matter with him, but it was revealed he was a drug fiend. You imagine if there were like 80 Paul Bearers, they'd all been promised, right?

We're also Paul Bearers. We're not. Hey guys, there's a lot of us here. Yeah. Everybody just grab a piece or whatever. Five bucks, I could be a Paul Bearer. You two then bought the Coca-Cola formula, which is the last thing that he had held on to that he kept selling for $600 from Mrs. Pemberton.

He also bought the remaining shares from Wolfwick Walker and Ms. Dozier, the last investors. In 1889. It's quite a coup. Yeah. In 1889, he told a reporter Coca-Cola was introduced to the public a little over a year ago in a modest way. The inventor was unable to devote to it the means necessary for its general introduction to the public.

1892, Asa Candler incorporated the Coca-Cola company, the current legal name. Two years later, Charlie Pemberton died of an opium overdose. So the sun was addicted to it. Sure. He was 40. Meanwhile, Coca-Cola took off. It was considered an intellectual beverage among rich white people. White people, the forest.

Yeah, the total worst. It makes your brain better. Holy shit. We're better than everyone because you're drinking Coca-Cola. Another reason for us to be great. To us. But true success came when the Coca-Cola company began bottling it in 1899. Now minorities who couldn't sit at soda fountains could get it.

Anyone who had a nickel could buy it and many did. Suddenly, with black people now enjoying cocaine, middle-class white people became concerned about the use of cocaine. Surely. Well, now you see that black people are doing it. It seems terrible. Southern newspapers reported that, quote, Negro cocaine fiends were raping white women and the police were unable to stop them.

Asa Candler caved to the racist pressure in 1903 and removed cocaine from Coca-Cola. It was replaced with more sugar and caffeine. The reason why cocaine got taken out of coke is racism. Is racism. It wouldn't be the most American drink of all time if that wasn't the case. That's just crazy. In 1908, Mrs. Pemberton felt ill. Some women went to Asa Candler and asked if he would give her $50 a month to live on.

He said no. And she died in September of 1909 of cancer. When the company moved in 1910, Asa Candler ordered all documents that were related to Pemberton and other investors burned. There were no ill feelings about the success Candler had with the company. The Pemberton family believed Coca-Cola would never have been successful under John Pemberton. It would have just been lost like so many other soda tonics at the time. Today, in Coca-Cola's Atlanta Museum, tour guides tell visitors that Coca-Cola never

had any cocaine in it. Really? What the fuck? They can't do that. What's their problem? I should be proud of that past. Because the guy who created cocaine was a fucking drug fiend. Tell the story.

Have you been on those tours? You need to spice it up. Oh, I'm sure they're terrible. They're terrible. And then they put sugar in it. And you try some. How about that? It's crazy.

But I'm pissed about the Coca-Cola tour. They should fucking tell. And the reason why we stopped using cocaine was because they were worried that black people were raping white women. If you look over here on the right, you'll actually see some of the early bottles. That's actually fascinating. You can see how much thicker the glass. Yes, that the black people were raping.

You can see the glass is thicker, which they ended up having to stop because procedurally that was costing. Yeah. Yeah, raping. Yes. Can I ask a question? Sure. And I want to point out everyone.

There's a gift shop. So if you guys want to take pictures with this stuff at the end, there's a great, yes, question. But the black people were raping white women? Yes. Because they used it because they had giant Coca-Cola? Yes. The black people were drinking Coca-Cola and the white women were being...

We take cash at the store, we'll take debit at the store, I'm trying to think if there's anything else. And guys, if you haven't... Is there Pepsi in the store? There's no... Is there a less rapy soda drink? No, but actually this is a fun fact. No flash photography on the tour while we're taking it.

Wow, fucking crazy though. But it wouldn't be America if the number one drink didn't have a crazy background. I'm curious how long until we have crack beer. Oh god, crack beer. I still think cocaine should be in some wines. So I'm on record. Have the states have legalized pot? Have they started putting pot and wine and stuff?

No, remember when we did that festival? There's not... Oh yeah, there's... But there's totally pot drinks. That was a pot drink. Yeah. Which I haven't tried it yet. I think Sprig or something.

Sprig. I think I gave it to you, didn't I? Yeah, but I... Yeah. You lost it. I don't know what happened to my weed beverage, man. Fucking there one minute. I'm like, I don't know.

I'm like, Pemberton. With my weed sodas. Holy shit. Well, shit, dude. That's fucking crazy. And... I want to thank Christine for research on that. She sent that to me and she was like, I don't know if there's much here.

And I read it and I was like, what? Oh, shit. Oh, yeah. Well... All right, guys. I hope you learned something today. I can't... That felt like two episodes.

Yeah, it was crazy. Jesus Christ. And I also... When I was writing it, I had to drive up a diagram because I was getting so confused by all the things. Yeah, no, there's a lot. That's what happens when you run a pyramid scheme or a Ponzi scheme. On cocaine.

Yeah. Trying to run a business. Just selling... It turns out there's gonna be 90 people. It's like, there's not a lot of polygamy CEOs like where you're like, you think that nine different people are like, uh-huh. You're married to him. You are also married to him.

Well, that's strange because he said I was the only... That's interesting. All right. All right. Well... And I love that a con man basically is the guy who won. Yeah. The guy who comes in and fuck just...

The guy who's like... Trying to tore a asshole. Yeah. Slowly but surely monopolized. Yeah. He's doing it. Anyway, Pepsi does. All right.

Pepsi does. We're signing cars. Thank you for coming.