The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 173 - The Know Nothing Party
Episode Date: May 16, 2016Comedians Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds examine the Know Nothing Party and nativism in America. SOURCESTOUR DATES REDBUBBLE MERCH...
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Welcome to the dollop this is a bi-weekly American History podcast. Each week I
read a story from American history to a guy named Gareth Reynolds who has no idea
what the topic is gonna be about or what the intro is gonna be like. I downgraded
or yeah I'm just a guy now. I downgraded our relationship. Just for this one or is
that new? I don't know how it's gonna go. Okay. You need to pick some things up. Oh
my god. Maybe drink less kombucha. This is my first of the day. Eventually a
parasite's just gonna live inside of you. Yeah and I have a feeling its name will
be Dave Anthony. Not cool. Do you want to look who to do? I'll do one bottle. People say this is funny. Not Gary Gareth. Dave okay. Someone or something is tickling people. Is it for fun? And this is not gonna come to tickling
podcast. Okay. You are queen fakie of made-up town. All hail Queen Shit of Liesville. A bunch of
religious virgins go to mingle and do what Frank? Hi Gary. No I see you done my friend.
You are listening to the doll. This podcast is sponsored by our subscribers
on patreon. I want to thank each everyone. You guys are awesome and it's very
beneficial considering how much work I do and how little Gareth does.
little Gareth does. Oh, 1751. Let's get smelly. Benjamin Franklin wrote observations concerning
the increase of mankind, people of counties, countries, etc. That's that's the title of
his essay. What is it? Observations concerning the increase of mankind, people of countries,
etc. Okay, still not getting it. It was a short essay he had written to give to his friends.
It would be published in 1755 and reissued 10 times over the next 15 years. Love, you
just give your friends essays. That that's the time when you did that. You're like,
yeah, you know what? I would like all my friends to know what I am thinking. I'm going to give
my sixth closest pack of friends an essay this week. Can I not get five essays this week? Can
I just Madison hang out. I've written you an essay pot. I've written you an essay and tell
my slaves what to do. Just do that. You're gonna love this one. This one has you all over it.
Good homework. Yes. Yes. Exactly Madison. Exactly. I'm weird looking. Yes, you are. Yeah,
very much so. Sort of like the penguin. You are much like the penguin. Yes. Anywho. Okay,
this is a good conversation. All right. The essay discussed population growth that slavery
diminished the nation was against protectionist policies and projected a large increase of
English settling in America due to available land. So he's just, you know, talking about
different shit. Yeah, a little all over the place. That's why you have a title like that.
Yeah, just write whatever the hell you want. And he was disturbed by all the Germans coming to
Pennsylvania. They did not speak the English language. Let me just check the sound. Yeah,
it's all good. They did not speak the English language and didn't know English culture. Quote,
why should the Palantine boars be suffered to swarm to our settlements and by hearing together
establish their languages and manner to the exclusion of ours? Why should Pennsylvania,
founded by the English, become a colony of aliens who will shortly be so numerous as to
Germanize us instead of our anglifying them and will never adopt our language or customs
anymore than they can acquire our complexion. It's like when you get your grandpa talking
about the war. Oh, boy. Oh, no, Franklin, don't. No, no, no. You know what? Benjamin Frank is awesome.
Their eyes are different. Get them talking about electricity. Get them talking about the
Constitution. Do not talk to about Germans. Oh, what did someone say German? No, Benjamin. They
make my blood boy. Their little eyes. Their little eyes. Their little be eyes. Their white eyes.
Their blonde hair. Ben, you just hate them because they're pretty. Bullshit. I'm also pretty in a
kind of penguin, penguin wearing bifocals way. You can actually call me the penguin. Quote,
penguin, Franklin. Quote. All Africa is black. Asia chiefly Tawny. America, holy so. And in
Europe, the Spaniards, Italian, French, Russians and Swedes are generally of what we call a swarthy
complexion, as are the Germans. The Saxons only accepted who with the English make the principal
body of white people on the face of the earth. So he's really. Benjamin, you don't hear this
about Benjamin. He's having a coming out party. He's on on our money. It's on fire. Benjamin,
Franklin was partaking in good old fashioned nativism, which the Native Americans also took
part in. This didn't work out. Yeah. Nativism is the political position of preserving status for
established inhabitants of a nation. But it's so I mean, any you just can't get past it. You can
never get past the idea that it wasn't. It was not theirs. Right. They made it theirs. Right. They
took it from a group of people who didn't even want to say it was theirs. They were like, it's
just everybody's you can own land. They're just like, it's ours. God damn it. Yeah. If this happened
on a playground, Benjamin Franklin would be on time out for sure. Yeah, a long time. Yeah. No,
Benjamin, you don't own the Tanbark. I do too. I found it second. No, that doesn't make sense. I
beat up Greg and then I took it. I found it. Exactly how all countries work. You just described
all countries. I beat up Greg and took it. I beat up Greg and I took it all. So nativism would
usually take the form of anti-foreignism or anti-Catholicism. Nativists objected to Irish
Roman Catholics because of their loyalty to the Pope and also because of their rejection of
Republicanism as an American ideal. Nativism was a holdover from England where anti-Catholic
hostility was the rage. So nativism really was just hating anyone different. Basically. Okay.
The Catholic population in colonial America was very small and they found themselves on the other
end of the law. In 1642, the colony of Virginia enacted a law prohibiting Catholic settlers.
I'm in. Just no Catholics. Okay, new rule. None of them. What? That's it. But this country was
founded upon. No. Okay. The second Massachusetts Charter in 1691 decreed, quote, that forever
hereafter there shall be liberty of conscious allowed in the worship of God to all Christians.
Except, except Papas. Wow. That was their better benefit of like a dot dot dot. Except people
follow the Pope dot dot dot. It's so great for everybody can worship. Unless you're a Catholic.
The whole thing is that we all need to be looked at the same in God's eyes. Unless, of course,
the Pope is your man. In 1692, Catholic Maryland overthrew its government, established the Church
of England by law and then forced Catholics to pay heavy taxes to support the Church of
England. Must have been weird to put your money towards that. Right? You're like, well,
that really doesn't benefit me at all. But I'm completely against this. The numbers are
on your side. This is exactly what I'm against. Yep. All right. Here you go. They no longer
were allowed to partake in politics. Mass, the Church's sacraments and Catholic schools
were outlawed. Wow. That's bold. Yep. So it almost feels like Catholics weren't allowed.
It seems like they're not liking them. Right. Okay. There were only 35,000 Catholics living
in in the colonies during the American Revolution. Almanacs, tracts, what's tracts? Sermons and
periodicals all vilified Catholics. School teachers instruction instructed children
to quote abhor that errant whore of Rome and all her blasphemies. Wow. Anyway, that's lesson
one. Okay. Now to bunnies. Now we're going to learn about bunnies, guys. First, let's
talk about the whore of Rome and then we'll do math. If you meet a Catholic, rip his dirty
dirty eyes out. Now to maths. There were also standard children's games like break the
Pope's neck. Well, that's not too secretive. This isn't America we heard about. How did
you? How do you play break the Pope's neck? I feel like that's one of the kids was probably
the Pope. And the stubby tale of a roasted turkey was nicknamed the Pope's nose. It's
over the pot. The turkey ass was the Pope's nose. It's over the pot. A few of America's
founding fathers were not into Catholics. In 1788, John Jay tried to get the New York
Legislature to prohibit Catholics from holding office. The legislature did not go along,
but it did pass a law requiring all office holders to renounce foreign authorities,
quote, in all matters, a classical as well as civil. So they so they almost made it harder
for more. They were like, we're not going to be that specific. We'll just say anyone
from other countries holding another religious another religious system in place. Yeah. That's
fun. In 1798, four bills called the Alien Sedition Act and Sedition Acts were passed
by US Congress and signed by President John Adams. These bills included new powers to
deport foreigners and made it harder for new immigrants to vote. Really didn't last that
long. What? Right? This sort of like, I mean, we were, you know, really, really hit the
ground running for a minute. Yeah. And then we're sort of like, well, there's a lot of
ground here, but I don't know if anyone can just hit the ground running. Yeah. It's weird
when a bunch of white Protestant men write a constitution for a country, how it's not
equal. Hmm. Well, I think we're saying different things. These bills included new member black
people were people with this. Oh, I'm I'm aware of where black people status is at in
this time. These bills included new powers to deport foreigners and made it harder for
new immigrants immigrants to vote before an immigrant would have to live in the US for
five years to become eligible to vote. But the new law increased this to 14 years. That
is quite a bump. Yeah, that's a huge because when you say five years, I, you know, I think
there could there could be something to the argument of you need to sort of understand
the culture a little bit when you get here. We sort of established before you get involved
in local politics. Yeah. Maybe you should know a little bit of what you will. Who are you
in this world? Yeah. What do you believe in this world before throwing you right into
the voting booth? I feel like five years is maybe a little excessive, but then 14 14
years is a bit much. 14 really seems like a long stretch. Now that you're almost dead.
Yeah. Yeah, really. And it also made how I wanted to do is vote for more potatoes.
The whole time. The only thing I wanted to do was say that we should have a few more
potatoes. No potato vote. You can just plant them. Oh my God. Why did I wait 14 years before
planting a potato? I had to find the candidate who backed the potatoes. This is why we call
you stupid Irish. Oh, well, it's all started to make a little bit more sense. And and it
also the acts also made people from enemy nations ineligible for naturalization. Okay.
At the time, the Federalist Party ran the government. They were the first American political
party and they were led by Alexander Hamilton. Hamo. Hamo. It was formed by bankers and
businessmen and believed a smart fiscal policy and nationalism were the way to go. Oh God,
I hate it. John Adams was the only Federalist president. They were very popular in cities
and in New England, and they saw foreigners as a deep threat to American security. And
John Adams had once gone to a Catholic mass to observe. Afterwards, he said he enjoyed
the music and then ridiculed the Catholic rituals like the music. I can't get one of
the songs out of my head, though. One Federalist Congressman said there was no need to quote
invite hordes of wild Irishmen, nor the turbulent and disorderly of all the world to come here
with a basic view to distract our tranquility. Wasn't the whole thing. What wasn't the whole
the whole idea? I think the point of this podcast is that no, it wasn't. You know all
the stuff you learned. Completely not true. Well, thankfully, I haven't learned that stuff,
but one that most have. You know a lot about animals and bugs. Yeah, thank you, Dave. Not
surprisingly, the opposing party, the Democratic Republican Party, as it was known, was made
up of a lot of foreigners, and this hurt their ability to get elected. Yeah, I mean, they
were like, what? I would have to be a fly on the wall in that room during their debates.
So I feel like, you know, again, we keep going over different fiscal policy, which I think
is important. But I think at the end of the day, if you think about it, a big problem
is that they simply would not allow us to. What if we hate ourselves? What if we start
a platform where we call ourselves shit? I like what you're thinking. But again, I
think the big fundamental issue is we can't. We're fucking garbage. I agree we are a total
trash. We're a shit people. The whole lot of us. Is there any way that one of us could
just vote for some potatoes? Who the fuck? God damn it, Paddy. I just would love me to
be a- Paddy! No, you just plant the potatoes. You don't fucking vote for them. Well, now
to be fair, to be fair, that's what I was told the last time, right? Okay. And then,
and then after talking to my wife, she laughed me out of the room. So I thought I'd come
here and confirm one more time. So I could simply plant them. I've been here 25 years
and we've been eating nothing but- So let's all laugh at Paddy here. You're a fucking idiot.
I'm laughing too. I'm laughing too. Eventually Thomas Jefferson would be elected in 1800
and the alien sedition acts were repealed, mostly. The Alien Enemies Act would remain.
But let's be clear. So, okay. Jefferson still wasn't a fan of Catholics. Right. Of the Catholic
Church in France, he wrote, quote, history, I believe furnishes no example of a priest-ridden
people maintaining a free civil government. Oh, God almighty. I mean, that's frustrating
on two levels now. Thomas Jefferson. Yeah. It's frustrating to hear him say that then
and then it's also frustrating to think that he would still be frustrated today. Quote,
in every country and in every age, the priest has been hostile to liberty. He is always in
alliance with the despot, abetting his abuses in return for protection to his own. See,
even as someone who's not religious- Right. I mean, granted, the priests have had some
marriage. But as far as seeming like rash, I mean, they for the most part seem fairly
rational. Obviously, there's a few bad. I'll stop. But the Catholics kept coming to America.
By 1820, the U.S. population of Catholics grew to over 300,000. There were great fears
among some native-born Americans that the foreigners would bring undemocratic ideas
to America, which would lead to an authoritarian government. Their allegiance to the Pope was
seen as an allegiance to a foreign leader. I'm a little confused, though, because they
were afraid that them coming to this country would form an authoritarian government when
it almost feels like at times we'd lived in an authoritarian government. I don't need
your thoughts. Okay. They believed Catholics would not stay loyal to America and would
undermine the system. Show me the birth certificate. Show it to me. In the 1830s, immigrants from
Ireland and Germany poured into the U.S., which greatly increased the Catholic population.
This was an explosion in immigration. Between 1830 and 1850, two million immigrants came
to America, and with them came new anti-immigrant movements. Sure. They blamed the- Why didn't
they just build a wall? Oh, God, why don't they just build a wall? Easy. They blamed
the uneducated, unskilled immigrants for poverty, crime, and disease in New York and other
major cities. Jobs were hard to come by, and of course, fingers were pointed at the immigrants.
They were also blamed for low wages, as well as crowding and expensive housing. The city
of New York complained in 1830 that its social services were being overwhelmed by the, quote,
foreign element. Okay. Sure. When Americans are secure in their own social standing, immigrants
are seen as harmless. If immigrant population rises while Americans are dealing with social
conflicts, the clash of traditions can become a crisis. That seems like there's no credible
evidence to back that up. No, I can't think of anything.
Natives and immigrants then fight over what it means to be American. Nativists believe
that immigrants will infiltrate and subvert American culture and take jobs. The threat
of natives, the threatened natives, then rise up and band together to repel the immigrant
horde. Dave, why did you want to do this one? I can't think of any reason. When they become
organized, a social movement is born. Huh. And that's bad for the establishment? Do you
think of any thing that that relates to? It kind of reminds me of the Twilight movies
a little bit. Right. That's exactly what I'm talking about. You think about it sort of
like, yeah, there's a whole, yeah, I think it's, is a final answer to Twilight movies.
Yes. You are correct. Yes. Moving on. The Irish Catholic immigrants reacted to these
attacks by turning inward and toward the church. Charities in education were sponsored
by the church, which are instrumental in helping immigrants survive the hostile environment.
Of course, their turning inward was just used against them by natives who said they were
rejecting American customs. Right. So when you're a bunch of cunts, well, then I'm just
going to talk to my friends. Lacking them. They just talked to their friends. Lacking
them, hoarding over each other like that. So, okay. So you really, you had very little
choices to what you could do that would be proper. Basically, you're just screwed. Yeah.
In places like New York City, where many immigrants went, the Democratic Party welcomed them.
The Democrats were popular in the West and South and immigrants gave them a foothold
in cities like New York. Okay. For those who don't know are American, the Democrats back
then were the pro-slavery party. Well, I think that we all have, you know, we've all done
silly stuff. I remember, I used to love the, I used to love, sure, it was, it's tough to
hear. I know. This turning inward increased nativism, which increased the Catholic's isolation.
Nothing, it's just like a hate spiral. I still feel like that. Feels like it's a way to ban
the Catholics together. Of course, in cities, the Protestant Irish and native-born Americans
organized groups and started handing out anti-Catholic literature and printing Catholic
hating newspapers. Well, those are fun. Those are fun papers to read. Gotta have a sense of humor
about yourself if you want to come to this country, unless it's about you. Fuck the Pope,
read all about it. Yeah. Stupid Catholics and their small Pope-loving brains.
Between 1830 and 1860, there were at least 270 books, 25 newspapers, 13 magazines devoted simply
to hating Catholics. Wow. That is, that's a big business. That's big. In 1836, Maria Monk published
a book called Awful Disclosures of the Hotel Dio Nunnery of Montreal. She wrote about forced
sexual intercourse with priests and the murders of nuns and children. No comment. It was an
incredibly successful book, but also a complete fabrication. Monk's mother said that Maria never
belonged to a nunnery and that a brain injury- The last name Monk is a giveaway on her background.
It's obvious who she works for. Yeah. The silent people. Right. Words, her written words were her
only weapon, David. Thank you. Otherwise you get shushed. I don't get it. Okay. Her mother said
that a brain injury she received as a child was probably the cause of her stories. Interesting.
I wish we could do that more now. Her book sold over three million copies. Whoa. That is a lot
for them. Holy God. And she wrote a sequel. Of course you do. Got to. Three million copies. That's
a lot of just total bullshit. That's still that's that's a million little pieces right there. Yes,
it is. At the same time, there was an anti-catholic lecture circuit. X priests and X nuns, at least
as they claimed, would tell audiences lord tales of nuns and priests having sex and of course dead
babies buried in the basements of convents. Wow. So are you inferring that these are possibly actors?
Well, they're just people who they're just people who realize they can make a buck. Yeah. Made up
stories on a lecture circuit. It's good times. Aside from the dead babies, it sounded like my
favorite religion for a second. The priests, the nuns getting busy. I like that girl. I like that.
A little sexual tension when they're lighting those candles. You know, you're like, you think he's
doing her? Excuse me, father. I have sinned. So have I, my boy. Sweet God. Sin this morning. Sinning
tonight. Protestant leader Lyman Beecher published an influential influential book called a plea for
the West. In it, he urged Protestants to exclude quote, the foreign Catholic menace from Western
settlements because they were corrupt. The book was one of the reasons a Boston mob attacked and
burned down a nearby convent. Oh, yes. Good must be. I mean, it must have been pretty good.
If you get them that fired up, that's got to be pretty compelling. It's a good book. Yeah.
13 people were arrested for burning down the convent. The trial revealed widely held anti-Catholic
biases. The prosecutor was not allowed to ask jurors whether they were prejudiced against
Catholics. That's pretty limiting. That's pretty limiting. I mean, goes to motivation.
When the first defendant was acquitted, an audience of a thousand people applauded. Wow.
When he left the courtroom, he was mobbed by people congratulating him. Boy, you done good.
Well done. Justice was served. Sacred of political parties were formed in response to the Catholic
threat. Some nativist groups tried to take advantage of the climate forming political
parties trying to gain control of local governments. None succeeded on a national level.
Yeah. Adorable. Oh, boy. The Native American Democratic Association was organized in 1835.
Their candidates ran on a platform openly opposing Catholics and immigrants and won 40%
of the vote in New York. Dave, I can't. I mean, what does it sound familiar? I think we're almost
at the, you almost just can't even talk about it. Similar groups then popped up in Baltimore,
Philadelphia, and other cities. In Philadelphia, tensions over religious, economic, and cultural
differences grew and grew. In 1842, there were rumors that a Catholic bishop wanted
Bibles removed from schools. Oh, no. Naturally, this was because the Pope had ordered it.
Right. Yeah. What else would it be? He put a message in this bottle. Motherfucking Pope.
He threw it across the ocean. That's what I'm talking about. Got there. Word got to them.
Yeah. And they know who it's from. Right. It's from Pope. And we all know the Pope hates Bibles.
Yeah. Of course. Yeah. No, he's always been really opposed to that sort of stuff.
What is the, imagine the Pope coming out against the Bible. It's a fucking, it's what he doesn't.
He was a bunch of really crazy bullshitter. Is that the Pope? He's a bullshit.
Does he have meatballs? Yeah, many meatballs. The meatball is not a bullshit.
The nativist American Republican Party formed in 1943 in New York and expanded quickly to
Philadelphia. In 1844, it won municipal elections in New York City and Philadelphia.
In May, 1944, the party held a meeting in an Irish suburb of Philadelphia. The locals,
Irish immigrants were not down with the public meeting. Really? Isn't that strange? Weird.
Let's go where they are and we'll have a fucking meeting. Like, really? Yeah. A little in your
face. Fist fights broke out. As the fighting spilled into the street, people shot at the
nativists from windows. So the Irish are shooting from their houses. I love that every real fight
goes into the streets. It falls into the streets. No, it's like a movie and it's true. It's great.
They all roll into the streets. Eventually, they just start rolling so much that they roll in one
direction and they either go through the door or out the back door or through the window,
but they're in the streets. So now they're shooting from the windows. Two nativists died,
then the riot was on. Nativists attacked a seminary and a few Catholic homes. So it really,
I mean, like if you saw like drunk Irish dudes getting into a fight, you were like,
sweet God, we're going to die. If you're a rational, you're just a rational person trying
to study the Bible. You're like, well, drop the accent. I got a bad feeling about tonight.
Have you been working on your accent? Yeah, I know. I hate those damn Catholics, too.
By the time the shitstorm stopped, four nativists were dead.
This was when it was hard to stop a riot because there wasn't a police force.
Perfect. A constable had to call the sheriff who then had to form a posse.
So it had to go, all right, all right, to like, okay, I've got it, to like a posse of people.
Yeah, it's just like six hours. That's the chain.
It must have felt pretty powerless to be a constable in these times. Oh, Jesus, the worst.
Boy, wish I had a partner. You watch out and if in like nine hours, you're going to be in trouble.
Once the rest of them get here, I'll be coming my mustache until then. A couple of days later,
the riot was back on. Nativists destroyed a fire station, 30 homes and a market.
The state militia arrived to stop the riot. But the next day it was back on. A Catholic church
was burned down and the crowd cheered as the steeple fell. The mayor pleaded for the mob to stop
and they just threw stones at him. It's tough. Come on, you guys. Please. He's reading pretty
please. Pretty pretty. Oh, okay. Okay. Some of you guys, some of those rocks are a little heavier
than the other rocks. A Catholic school in a seminary were burned down. This time 14 people
were killed. I will say this, their plan almost sounds effective. I mean, they're really getting
rid of a lot of Catholics and Catholic training facilities. They're getting into the heart of
it. Yeah. The mayor created a force to protect Catholic churches. Then in July, when nativists
saw some guns being brought into a church, which were being used by the volunteer forces to protect
it. Well, from them. Right. They lost it. The church was surrounded. After a few days of back
and forth, there was now a huge nativist crowd and a large posse along with the military protecting
the church. And of course, off it went. The fighting lasted for hours. Both sides shooting,
then they both brought in cannons. It's just amazing. Because they're fighting over the fact
that they might fight each other. The reason these guys are fighting is because they were bringing
in weapons to protect themselves in case there was a fight. Yeah. So they're just like, oh,
wait a minute, they think we might fight, fight, fight, fight. And now they've upgraded to cannons.
Canons for sure. Yep. Logical. The next morning, it was all over 15 people have been killed.
Meanwhile, in New York City, Archbishop John Hughes called for the Irish to defend
St. Patrick's Cathedral as nativist mobs began roaming the city. The armed Irish occupied the
churchyard and the anti-immigrant mobs were scared off from attacking the cathedral. No Catholic
churches were burned in New York. Okay. That's because we're in New York. Yeah. Right. Yeah,
that's right. The riots caused further tension between immigrants and nativists all across
America. And this became an issue in the 1940, sorry, 1844 presidential campaign. The Catholic
Church decided to open their own schools instead of trying to influence public education. Okay.
As with any polarization episode, people took sides and many went back,
many went to back the American Republican Party or the Native American Party, which were
essentially the same party, but with no national organization. A national convention was called
in July 1845 for nativists to come together. Okay. They now would be called the Native American
Party and they drafted a platform. It's just so hard to hear Native American Party as like the
thriving party when it's just yeah, when it's not made up of Native Americans. You're correct.
Okay. Well, their version of Native Americans. Right. They're right. I mean, which says a lot.
Yeah. Yeah. The platform called for immigrants to live in America 21 years before becoming
citizens. In other words, two thirds of your life. Well, if you come here and you're 30,
that's it you're dead. I mean, back then the life span is yeah.
Yeah. And also other sweeping immigration reforms, but they were unable to get Congress to act on
it. And then the Mexican American War broke out leading Americans to take their eye off the immigrant
issue. The war led to the Native American Party's demise, but the anger against immigrants still
burned with many good. You like that shit proud of it. After the war, not all was well. Native
born Americans were facing threats to the political, economic and cultural fabric of their lives.
The two party political system was collapsing. Oh boy. slavery divided the Whig Party and the
Democratic Party. Northern and Southern politicians had been fighting against each
other regardless of the party line. This sound weird. Nope. I'm not even going to do it anymore.
Any sort of parallel? No, no, no, no, no. Nope. People stop believing the present ruling political
parties could hold the country together. Nope. Not doing it. Not doing it. No, no, no, no. Nope.
This made voters willing to consider a third party, especially one that would not give
into the north south tension. Stop it. Stop tempting me. Stop. I'm not doing it. I don't
know what you're talking about. I'm not doing it. The economy was a huge issue. I'm not doing it,
motherfucker. Stop. Okay. I'm not playing your game anymore, pal. Between 1850 and 1854, the American
economy fluctuated insanely between boom and depression. In 1854 came a huge rise in inflation
due to the California gold rush. And at the same time, there was a huge rise in immigration. Over
400,000 that year. There were Chinese and Japanese on the west coast, Italians, Irish, and Germans
on the east. They were competing with native born Americans for the few jobs that were out there.
It was the worst in cities in the south. Immigrants pushed for legislation to keep blacks from
certain jobs, such as dock workers. I mean, if you're like black people are like, I mean,
what the fuck? What is it going to take? Well, it wasn't that it was that they were slaves.
And so if you kept them, if you kept masters from having their slaves work on the docks,
then they'd have to pay people. Right. But it's still the idea that like immigrants are like,
yeah, yeah, get out of here, black people. And they're like, no, but you're getting shit on you.
This of course caused slave owners to be concerned about immigrants. One southerner,
L. W. Spratt of South Carolina, said that immigrants would quote question the right
of masters to employ their slaves in any works that they may wish for. And thus,
the town of Charleston at the very heart of slavery may become a fortress of democratic
power against slavery. Could you imagine? Oh, God, what kind of anarchy is this? Oh,
we can't have this. Native born Americans linked the loss of their economic security with the rise
of immigrant labor that was just actually occurring coincidentally. As noted by Benjamin Franklin,
there were big cultural differences besides just religion. The immigrants also wanted
social reform, free schools and temperance. Fools. Fools. Temperance was a big problem. The Irish
and German came from cultures where drinking was the norm. Right. This caused a backlash and many
natives began to push to limit drinking as a way to quote cure the drunken Irishman.
Good luck. Yeah, that'll do. We're still trying that. Yeah, you guys should meet my dad.
So temperance reform became a status issue and was an obvious difference between natives
and immigrants. The immigrants naturally were furious because they're trying to take away
their whiskey. I mean, that's that is bullshit. It is bullshit. Yeah, from their cold dead hands.
Who knew I didn't had no idea that the fucking temperance movement was partially based in just
fucking non temperance. Immigrant assholeism.
So in 1850, a man named Charles Allen and others formed a secret nativist society in New York.
Yeah, always good. Always good when a bunch of white guys get together and go,
how do we cut out everybody again? I agree. In quiet secrecy. Yeah. Secret societies were all
the rage then. This was the era of Masonic temples and the Knights Templar. I mean, it's all the rage
and something you can't talk about. Right. Well, everybody's doing it. I mean, nobody's doing it.
Well, you give a couple of weeks. Everybody's doing it. Everybody's doing it. Hey, do you know about
the, huh? No, what is that? Oh, no, not me. Hold on. Why does everyone keep doing that to me? Hey,
hey, hey, hey. Everybody keeps doing you part of the, huh, huh, huh? No. Oh, never mind. Wait.
Gotta go. Okay. Uh, so
this, uh, this group was called the order of the Star Spangled Banner. Cool. Because just,
just fucking hack it up. Just as hacky as possible. We meet inside of the flag.
You had to be 21. Okay. And a Protestant. Okay. And you had to follow orders without
questioning. Hey, cool. Home of the free. They had signals, rituals, and sacred oaths. Okay.
The brotherhood had three goals. Prevent non native born citizens from holding public office.
All right. Stop native Catholics from the same. Okay. And uphold and defend the union. Well,
so they're all very different. They are vastly different. They also created a mysterious hero
who they called Sam. Oh, no, he's not an uncle, is he? He was not Uncle Sam. Oh. But a younger
gentleman, the nephew of Uncle Sam. Wait, they created, yep. Was Uncle Sam based on anyone? Uncle
Sam already existed. But was he based on anybody? I don't know if he was based on anybody. I think
he was like a fabricated, fabricated character to rally people. So they just made up another
They made up his nephew. They made up a relative character. Well, if he's called Uncle Sam,
there's got to be another guy nephew, Sam, nephew, Sam. Oh, great. And his nephew, Sam.
Sam believed that America shall rule America. Joining the order was known as going to see Sam.
I'm going to go see Sam. Oh, you are. Yeah. Good. Tell him I said hi. Yeah, I will. Yeah. He's a
good guy. Also, if you see, are you going to see Larry? Oh, you think? Oh, what? Oh, yeah. Yeah.
I'm also going to see Larry. Okay. Yeah. Because that's an anti Polish group. Oh, wait, you know
about the groups? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Joining the order was known as going to see Sam. Sam had
godlike qualities that members thought they shared. Always grounding quote. He never strikes
without warning. But when he does the edge of his claymore severs joints and marrow,
and a heck of tomb falls with every blow. Dave, what's a heck of tomb? Fuck, I looked it up,
and now I forgot. Oh, man. Come. Let's just say bag of bones. Okay. Great. Still, it's violent.
Yeah. The society picked candidates for public office and decided to vote for candidates who
were quote, the most American. Good. They kept low profiles, often denying what they're like.
The kind of guy will write like rap bacon around the end of an AK 40. That's the fellow shooting
it. Yep. They kept low profiles, often denying what they were up to. When questioned by reporters,
they would reply, I know nothing. Interesting. Every now people cover up that answer with
other bullshit. Yes, they certainly do. Every member was sworn to secrecy. Newspaper editor,
Horace Greenlee, dubbed them the know nothings. And the name stuck. Okay, cool. Was that an
effective marketing strategy at the end of the day? Good. And they were successful. Their
candidates won elections in the spring of 1854 in Boston, Salem, and the entire state of Massachusetts
in the fall. So people literally be like, I'm voting for the know nothing. Yeah. Okay. In Boston,
a special board was set up to investigate the sex lives of nuns. Wow, what an order.
That's an exciting assignment when you get that one. Sweet. Yeah, awesome. Yeah. I thought you
guys were just going to have me follow some more of these dudes with weird facial hair. So are there
photos or like stories like a, Hey, I went to the convent the other day and you know,
to repair some pipes and you know what, I'm going to take you off of this case.
No, not a question. Did you see a little wound up ever since I gave you that one in there? They
were like, that's not that's not the pipe you're here to repair. No, no, no, you stop going in
there. We'll take care of your pipe. You're not going in there to fuck nuns. Were you listening?
Jesus, look at how sweaty you are. Oh, it's just the nuns. Sit down, get up some water. My God,
this investigation is going very well. You're not investigating anything. I'm putting you on
something. You're going to go investigate. No, stop it. Get the wig candidate for the
mayor of Philadelphia came out as a no nothing. He then wanted a landslide. I hope he took his
wig off when he did that. I'm actually a no nothing. And I was the whole time. Soon after,
all naturalized citizens on the police force were fired. All that. So anybody who was just any
immigrant who had former immigrant who now was a police officer and established themselves as a
police officer is fired. Okay, good. Good. Washington, the Washington DC mayor was now a no
nothing. They helped the mayor of San Francisco to win and the governor of California, a no nothing
judge on the California State Supreme Court ruled that no Chinese person could testify as a witness
against a white man. Well, that's probably going to make truth seeking difficult. So if you were
Chinese, you were like, you just wouldn't say anything. Yeah, it's almost like how in Muslim
countries, if like women are raped, they're they're put in jail for adultery. It's exactly
sort of that. So you're just like, you know, maybe I just won't say anything. You created the worst
condition possible for honesty. Levi Boone was elected mayor of Chicago for the no nothings.
He then barred all immigrants from city jobs. Good. Good. Well, it sounds like it's all coming
together as far as the melting pot angle. Now, one of the ways they they pulled off these election
victories was to align with gangs. The rip wraps and pug uglies in Baltimore, the Bowie Boys in
New York. Those are our old friends. Yeah, our bros. The no nothings also have their own paramilitary
organization called the wide awakes. Jesus paramilitary. Yeah, fuck. Yeah. Shit's fucking real.
They would scare away immigrants on election day. And it worked. Why they needed a driver's license.
Yeah, kind of. Or they just get hit with a bat. Same thing. As their success peaked future president
Rutherford B. Hayes observed how people do hate Catholics. What they really do, huh? Hmm. Well,
this is interesting. They really seem to not like them. You know, I'm sort of noticing a trend.
Could you pass the caveat? Thank you. Boy, I love it when it's nice and eggy.
The no nothings had so much success, they decided to organize nationally and become a national party.
Okay. They worked in Sigurd for a few years. Then in 1855, they became an open political
party renamed the American Party. All right. That way they could show what they were super into.
That's sort of like how Budweiser is now. Did you see this? How Budweiser until August is allowed
or until November is allowed to call them their beer America? Yeah, but isn't that just the Belgian
people that own it making fun of Americans? I think it is. Look, whatever it is, I just know
we're going to eat it up like slop. Oh, fuck yes. I mean, there's going to be. We've got to be so
excited about that. Yeah, Belgium. I mean, if you could make that connection, I'm sure people would
be upset. No, they probably wouldn't be. Oh, it's all over. When you're drinking, when you're drinking
America, the beer, I think we're like getting out of control. Yeah, we've completely lost our mind.
Okay. So at this point, the party had an estimated membership of a million and 250,000.
Their main membership was lower middle class or blue collar workers. Can you believe that?
Yes, I can believe that. It's so weird that no, and when economic times aren't going well that
that immigrants are pitted against blue collar, that doesn't usually seem to be the way I see no
connection. They were against wealth, elites, and experts. Why? I mean, it's my favorite.
The war on experts. I think it's my favorite. Oh, hey, Mr. I know everything. Yes, I went to
school for this. Oh, did you go to school for this? Yes, I'm telling you, it's based on fact.
Oh, yeah. Well, how about this? Fuck you, Mr. I know stuff. I do know stuff. I'm trying to help you.
I get no stuff too. Okay, I guess I shouldn't have gone to the know nothing. Hey, check out the expert.
Hi, I'd love to. Mr. I went to school to learn about things. I did. I'm proud of my- Did you?
Yeah. Because I can think too. It's not, I'm not saying you can't think. Oh, you're not?
No. Because you look at me like I'm an animal. I'm trying to help you idiots. Fuck you. Hey,
you know what? Prolox it is. God damn it. Some of those are bigger than others.
Some of those are bigger than others.
The poor were overthrowing the upper class. Where they ruled, they passed legislation to
regulate railroads, insurance companies and utilities. They funded books for schools and gave more
money to libraries. They were at the height of their power in 1855. And with it came
Merch. Merch? There were no nothing candies. Oh boy. No nothing tea. Oh boy. And no nothing
toothpicks. Steaks? Yeah, just all kinds of no nothing stuff. Geez. Yeah, I'd like some bread
and a pack of no nothings. All right, there you are. That is amazing. Merch. Merch. People
realized Merch early. Merch. Yeah. Fast. But don't you love that that it's also a fucking
against the upper class? It's a fucking revolution of sorts. Yes. That like while they are against
immigrants, they're also getting in and taking their shit back. It's it's they there's good parts
and bad parts, which people don't realize is what a lot of the Trump supporters want to do.
Well, that is true. I feel it really is quite a quite an onion to slice when you want to when
you want to talk about what is at the heart of the Trump thing. It's really hard because some of it
is totally grounded in something that like like guys like you and I would totally share, you know,
like the idea of like doing that. But then there's just the fucking nuts. Yeah. There's the rest of
the body. Oh, God, we're all gonna die. Yeah. Fast, too. Really way faster than I thought.
It's almost like for a long time we were like on the Titanic, and it was sinking. And instead of
organizing the chairs, people like, let's punch holes in the ship and burn all the wood and try
to get each other underwater as fast as we can. I could see us drowning before this thing
hits the ocean. I'm not kidding. Their most important duty, of course, was to stop Catholics.
Yes. The Republic was described by the party as an ideal place which needed to be defended at all
costs. Quote, examine the history of the Roman Catholic Church throughout all time. Her course
has ever been a consistent one like the fabled upus tree. Oh, God, that is one of my favorite
fables. Upus tree? Down on upus tree. Like the fabled upus tree, it is no tree. Upus tree?
Tree. No, I'm saying tree. Yeah. You think just because I was singing the main main. You're not
with us, are you? For sure. You're not part of this. This is part of the upus tree. No, you're
not part of our secret group. Hey, all right, fine. I'm a no something. I'm an actual strive for
knowledge. Like the fabled upus tree, it is her office to destroy every healthy organization
which exists. She is a serpent that gives no alarm. A moral plagued spot in a political
miasma in a word. She is that whitened tomb which is inwardly, inwardly full of dead men's
bones and corruption. Hell must rejoice and demons exult in so a cursed institution. So long as it
shall flourish, Satan will need no emissaries. Uh, yeah. Uh-huh. Question in the back. Yes,
go ahead. Um, what? Okay, I'll read it again. Okay. But it's about the church, the Catholic
Church being bad. Okay, okay, okay. The Catholic Church is bad. Is that good? Yeah, yeah. Okay,
so let's sum it up. Okay. Super fucked up Catholic Church. Right. You're part of the
group, yeah? God, ask me again. I got you, motherfucker. Who is at the door? You ask who is
at the door? Well, ask me again. I'm not at the door. To stop Catholic evil, all one had to do
was just join the party and vote the no nothing ticket. Once you control the party with tough
and naturalization laws and prevent Catholics from holding public office, this would stop the
Catholic plot. Oddly enough, the Catholic plot. Oddly enough, they said this would not compromise
Catholics religious freedom. No, no, what? How could he even be? How could you even say that
it would? What do you mean? What do you mean? How could you even make that connection?
That's great. That is, but you have to admit that's quite a logically. Yeah. If someone's just
trying to shut you out of everything. Yeah. To say that in some way this might affect your religious
freedom. They believed they were just sacrificing the political rights of a few immigrants and
they were doing this out of love. Thank you. And that is what really hurts is that we're trying
to love you. Right. And you're acting like we're trying to squeeze you really hard and suffocate
you. I know. It's hard. I don't understand what they're doing. I just like their whole thing
is a little off. I love them. Oh, they're great. Everything they hold important I despise and
don't trust. They believe that immigrants did not know enough to protect themselves. It's true.
Sad, right? Great. Kind of like a goat whose legs doesn't work. A common thing that people say
today. No, nothing party leader Frederick and Spatch summed it up. Quote, it is because we love
the immigrants and the interests of our country that we would give them no higher political position
than citizenship. Look, I mean, I guess my first question is he knew he was being quoted or he
had no idea. He got halfway through that and he was like, let me try again. Sorry, that actually
is completely contradictory. As such, they can be happy and useful. Yeah, see, if their little minds
are lulled into this sort of position, scurrying around at the bottom. But if they get up above,
if they get lifted up high, they don't know what they're doing. It's for their own good. It's like
giving a bat a fork. It would be like sitting a baby at a poker table. Thank you. Yes.
Yes. Which is weird because at the same time, nativist mobs of hundreds or thousands were
attacking immigrants in what we're called patty hunts. That's a fun title.
Isn't that a game they have on PlayStation? I think yeah. Patty hunts. I love Patty hunts.
Patty hunts is the best. Patty hunts. I made it to level four. Patty hunts. Patty hunts.
Yeah. The more they came out, the more bold nativists were in their attacks on immigrants.
And they became more bold during elections. In Louisville in early August, a contentious
election was looming. George Prentice, editor of the Louisville Daily Journal,
inflamed the nativists with editorials in the lead up. He denounced the
quote, most pestilent influence of the foreign swarms loyal to an inflamed Italian despot
who keeps people kissing his toes all day. And they were offended? I think what part got him?
But I feel like the doesn't the Pope wash people's feet? He doesn't have people kiss his toes?
Or was the Pope different back then? Was the Pope like I'm sitting here so you might as well
start kissing that shit? Could be a 69 kind of situation where they're like washing his feet
on one end and he's kind of kissing theirs. Yep. So on August 6th, the city was 10th.
About a quarter of the city was German and Irish Catholic who were mostly new arrivals.
We were like boy, we made the wrong call. No, fuck. Why do aches were stationed at the polls and
only let men with a yellow no nothing ticket vote? Hundreds are kept from voting. A former
congressman appeared to the no nothings pleading to let everyone vote rocks and he was beaten.
Okay, no rocks, but at least they beat him. Now, the Irish Catholics were not pleased with
this turn of events. Really? In the afternoon, it went off. 15 men were shot, including a cop.
Three of them died. Homes of Germans were broken into and looted. Around 4pm, a huge mob entered
the German neighborhood on Shelby Street with shotguns, muskets, and rifles and started attacking
people. The mayor who was a no nothing was able to get them to stop and leave. Then they set a
brewery on fire. You were leaving. A reverend was stoned to death. Oh, God. Three Irish men were
beaten on Main Street and the Irish responded by showing by shooting out of their houses. Again,
they're shooting out of their houses. That seems like a smart move. Yeah, it's fucking great.
Two men were killed and Irishman was relieved of his gun and then hung, but he survived.
Wow, terrible job. Irish, because he's Irish. That's great though. That's isn't going to fucking stop
me. It was probably like Popeye, like somebody was just like, look, looks like Clarence is dead.
Part of a little bit of whiskey in his mouth. And then he was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Boy,
I ain't I got thirst. I ain't I got it. Yeah, well, go show them. We will. Just after sunset,
a row of houses owned by an Irish landlord were burned down as the tenants fled in flames.
They were gunned down. Debbie, no security deposits given back. No security deposits will
be given back. Read the fine print on your knee. We're all fucking dead anyway. Oh, for a second,
I thought you were going to ask for your security deposits back. Oh, we're dead. I know. Turns
out worked out nice for me. Wait, what do you mean we're dead? Yeah, you're dead. Oh, fuck,
I was going to collect a security deposit. Yeah, well, you went around to collect security
deposits when people were shooting. Right, right. Well, in retrospect,
shouldn't have them after life ain't much is it? No, it's not good. Much pretty basic.
This would become a poster on the wall or something. Just really live in the room up. Oh,
I got a Guinness one. Oh, that's nice. This would become known as Bloody Monday. More than 100
businesses, homes and tenements were vandalized or burned down. The official death toll was 22,
but leading Catholics said it was well over 100 with entire families being burned alive in the
row of houses. Not to be insensitive, but boarders in Hollywood does a great Bloody Monday where it's
two for $7 and their batch of Bloody Mary mixes unreal. But my heart goes out to
anyone. I get it. No, it's a good it's a great time for an ad. Buddy, buddy, let me tell you,
if you think you're not you think you're gonna have two, you'll have six. We do. We do ads here
on that. Absolutely. There were no criminal prosecutions for the riot or the deaths. Tens
of thousands of Louisville citizens fled the city permanently. In Baltimore, the Know-Nothings had
taken control of the city government in the 1854 elections. But the next year they lost control
and that in 1856, the American Party and the Democratic Party were preparing for a tense
election day. In the run up, both parties, as was common at the time, would march through each
other's wards at night, singing songs, holding banners and torches and making speeches. I mean,
this sounds like it. You might be asking for it a little. A little bit. A little bit. The fine line
between campaigning and badgering. Often someone will be stabbed with a shoemaker's all, which was
like an ice pick. That was just sort of like an outreach. They would go into another neighborhood
and then dudes from the neighborhood would walk out and just fucking shank them. Okay. Starting
to see the forest through the trees on the plan a little bit. The shoemaker's all was so a part of
elections that in 1859, the American Party would put the all on their banners. Wow, that is a
thing. That's quite a kiss. That's quite a kissing of the ass. This is how we do our stabbing.
All right. Now, what if I told you guys we would put that on our company logo? So that's our banner.
It says the American Party. There's the fucking all and then underneath it says,
don't fuck with us. Vote for us. Good. Your fucking shit bags. Right. I didn't look at the back,
but that is on the back. Dear animals. Oh gosh. I'm going to put this in your eye. Okay. How about
a vote? Well, okay, you're getting you're getting there very quickly. So slow down. We have no
no, you don't understand how this works. I'm going to poke you in your gut, you fucking animal.
Why do people not get you on their side? How about a vote for daddy? Okay, everyone,
we're going to vote. Otherwise, this guy's going to stir us. Oh God. The favorite picture on the
banners was a figure of a man running with another man chasing him while sticking him within all.
Wow. That is, I mean, that's just so up front. It's very, it just tells you. Oh,
so they're the party that does that. Okay. Very clear. Very, very clear. So on election day,
the no nothing pug uglies, the local Baltimore gang associated with the no nothing would strap
alls to their knees and surround voters and force them to run off. You mean it was a runoff election?
So they would. Yeah, I got they had ice pick. They had ice picks on their knees as a sort of
like, Hey, just so you know, I'll be stabbing you right there. If you need them. Yeah. If you
want to go in there, that's fine. We got them. We can show them to you. Start point first.
They would yell, come up and vote. There's room for all.
So I mean, that's really displaying ice picks to stab people. That's not bad.
This is when voting was not private. You had to wait in line, pass groups of men who watched you,
and then you'd put your ticket into the box of who you wanted to vote for.
Boy, who am I? Who am I gonna? Yeah. Okay. Boy, I was, I've been undecided. I think I'm gonna
go no nothing. I think I'll vote. That's good. Have you seen me ice pick? Yeah. She's a beaut.
Yeah, for sure. I think politically, I'm not not affiliated with them. But while I'm here,
I'm feeling strong about what they're doing. Gonna put it right in your tummy. I'm gonna vote it.
Right away. immigrants had to present their papers. But in a no nothing war, the immigrants would just
be beaten and leave. Okay. The gangs had other ways to sway the vote. They needed other ways.
Nice. One was called cooping. Oh, God. They would kidnap people, mostly immigrants,
take them to cellars or sheds and hold them in disgusting conditions.
They would then make them drink tons of whiskey. And then they'd rob them and kick the shit out
of them. Then they would take them to the polls to vote. And they'd be taken to poll after poll
after poll. So okay. I honestly, if you really think about it as an immigrant,
this was probably best case scenario for you. You got shitfaced and you got driven
around for a while and you got to vote against what you're interested in. Sure.
Peter Fitzpatrick test. I voted 15 times today, for 15, but no one else do candidates after they
beat the shit out of me. But this democracy is pretty great. We're not thinking a lot.
Paddy, how you doing?
It's just wanted to be part of the movement for once in my life.
You get so used to being pushed down into the city at age.
Well, the idea that you can finally vote, not only vote one time,
but cast your ballot 15 to 20 times with a pick in your bag.
What a country, you know.
How did you take the boat riders to go back to Ireland?
Roughly. Don't do it.
Peter Fitzpatrick testified that he was held in Pug Ugly Razz Levy's Coupe.
There he watched as a pug ugly burned off a German immigrant's beard with a candle.
It's gone. Smell it. It's scented.
And there were the riots.
As expected, shots were fired by different mobs at each other.
They also used pickaxes to rip up cobblestones and throw them at each other.
And it wasn't just the mobs who were hurt.
Often innocent civilians were killed by gunfire.
That seems to be the MO.
In the Sixth Ward, the gangs battled with artillery on Orlin Street for several hours.
Jesus.
Just election day, you guys.
There were more. The oh, right there.
The rip wraps in the Pug Ugly's attacked the Democratic held new market fire company.
Five died there.
The violence was very well organized and planned.
The gang members had experienced and targeted petty naff.
The new market fire company's most notorious fighter.
The result of the 1856 election was a victory by the no nothings by 9000 votes.
Can you believe that? I don't know how they pulled that off.
How do you think they won?
I had no idea. The polling.
Get the message out there.
Yeah, the polling before said that they were going to lose.
The exit polling was not good.
You know what might have had something to do with it?
The artillery.
Oh, I don't know.
And the kidnappings and the murders.
The stabbing.
Right. I sort of feel like, again, it was just one of those things where they got their message out a little bit.
No, ground game.
Yeah.
Ground game. Exactly. Ground game.
In 1856, the outgoing mayor estimated there were 30 dead and 350 wounded on that day.
And every election in Baltimore between 1854 and 1858, at least a dozen people were killed on election day.
Jesus.
The no nothing violence was so brutal.
So when they say voter die today.
Fucking mean it.
A little different.
The no thing violence is so brutal that in 1856, so brutal in 1856, but that by 1857, the Democratic Party had all but given up Maryland.
The no nothing's won the governor's office, the house, the Senate and the congressional delegation.
Good for them.
But once the no nothing's began to exert control and win elections, they ran into a problem.
They were not able to make things better.
They could not deliver on their promises.
Their entire platform was based on lies and this caused voters.
Because the nation was in such horrible trouble to look at competing ideas for answers.
Boy.
So they get in there and it turns out the immigrants are diversity was actually maybe something that would have been good.
Abraham.
Wait.
Many also detested their brutal ways, especially after the riots and when they tarred and feathered a priest in Maine.
Well, but in their defense, it was really funny.
I mean, hilarious.
He looked like a big pious bird.
Politicians began to leave the party and join the Republicans and Democrats.
The battle was now clearly over slavery and the no nothing's just wanted to fight off the Catholics.
Don't forget about our message.
We don't know what we like on slavery.
Abraham Lincoln was disgusted.
He said, quote, I am not a no nothing that is certain. How could I be? How can anyone who abhorred the oppression of Negroes be in favor of degrading classes of white people?
I find it so disgusting.
I'll fill my enormous hat with vomit.
Okay.
He said that, right?
Is that a true thing?
Yeah.
Fair.
He used to always say that.
Oh, yeah, I've seen that too.
Slavery makes me so disgusted.
I may as well feel my big weird hat with throw up.
Who wants to wrestle?
So they left the party.
Many looked toward the Republican Party, who in 1856 were making the case that the reason for American ills was slave power.
The Republicans incorporated anti slavery into their official party rhetoric, which put it in direct competition with the no nothing blame the immigrant rhetoric.
Slavery was described as a bigger evil than Catholicism.
But wait, they're calling, sorry, what is their exact angle on slavery?
Who?
The Republicans?
Yeah.
They're again it?
They're again it?
Yeah.
Did you time travel?
No, Republicans.
They're against it.
We're the ones who are against slavery.
Democrats are for slavery.
Right.
So they're against it.
And so they're basically saying, well, the problems with all the country now is not anti immigration, it's that there's slave holders.
That's the problem.
Okay.
It's causing all our problems.
Okay.
So my favorite sentence is slavery was described as a bigger evil than Catholicism.
Yeah.
If you can imagine.
Well.
If you can imagine a world.
I agree with you, Dave.
That's not true.
Where slavery.
I agree.
It's worse than.
It's offensive to the Catholic.
Catholicism.
I agree.
It's offensive to Catholic people.
Now Southern politicians and planters became the villains.
The Whigs Democrats and Republicans all pointed out that the no nothing party at its core would hurt free speech, free religion and individual worth to achieve their goals.
How could one destroy the Catholics by undermining Americans long held rights?
Right.
So they, you know, yeah, it's the thing we're talking about.
The contradiction slowly.
Makes no sense to me.
The contradiction slowly weakened the no nothings, at least among the thoughtful members of the party.
Okay.
Another big problem with the no nothing party was that they did not see the changing of America.
I won't do it.
What?
Not.
Nope.
Nope.
The US was not a single country in 1855.
It was completely splitting apart into North and South.
The entire no nothing platform was just built upon it being a united republic without sectional issues.
The party just ignored the truth of changing political realities.
We've done here.
And this was a big part of the end of the no nothings.
It sounds like today.
Okay.
It sounds just like today.
It's exactly today.
Okay.
It's today.
It's the same shit different era.
What are you talking about?
Oh, go to hell.
This ignoring of the truth of political realities has ended many parties in America and elsewhere.
If you ignore the reality on the ground, you will perish.
Democrats.
In the South, the party was mostly ex-wigs, but not pro-slavery wigs who went to the Democrats.
They briefly challenged the Democrats for dominance in 1855, but lost and quickly disintegrated.
In Louisiana and Maryland, things got so bad, the no nothings started accepting native born Catholics.
Oh boy.
So they sort of compromised their initial values to survive.
Okay.
So what about we let in Catholics that were born here?
They're just ideas.
They're just ideas.
The ideas that we want to debate on.
I mean, it's fucking crazy.
It's just in the North, the party quickly collapsed after 1855 dividing over slavery.
This eventually led to a split in the party.
One side changed its name from Sam to Jonathan.
Oh God.
What's his brother?
His made up brother, Jonathan.
Not another nephew, Johnny.
Who's actually awesome.
There ain't no Johnny, we're Sam's.
Listen, Sam's dead.
Fuck you, we're the Jonathan's.
Come on, the Jonathan's is fighting the Sam's.
In the streets.
I ain't no Sam.
I'm a fucking Jonathan.
You sound ridiculous, brother.
The Jonathan's formed an anti-slavery and anti-Catholic party and they let Protestant immigrants into the party.
Boy, they are really like everybody is just sort of watering down their initial values.
Now everything has a subset.
Now it used to be like here are things one, two, three.
Now it's like one A, one B, one C.
I just love that.
All right.
We'll let in immigrants, but good ones.
Okay.
Better.
And down there they're like, all right, no immigrants but Catholics.
Okay.
Everybody's on board, right?
We're holding it together.
We're all as well, right?
More and more of the no-nothings peeled off and joined the Republicans.
The no-nothings elected Millard Fillmore to be their presidential nominee in 1856.
He won 23% of the popular vote and one state, Maryland.
American party members continued to leave for other parties and by 1860, they were pretty much toast.
Nativism was far from over in America.
The anti-Chinese movement flared up in the late 1800s.
Anti-Catholicism rose again in the late 1800s as well.
In the early 1900s through 1920s, a movement against Eastern and Southern European immigrants kicked off.
In the 1920s, the Ku Klux Klan became very popular.
They were anti-Catholic, anti-Semitic, anti-alien, anti-black.
In the mid-1960s, the Immigration Reform Act brought immigrants from third world nations and a movement against bilingualism began.
In the 1980s, an English-only movement began to try to force the language of English on the government and the private sector.
In the early 1990s, California lashed back against Mexican Central and American immigrants, passing a restrictive law that was ruled illegal by the courts.
And then now we have today.
Well, so I think my point is, is that when people say that Trump and his anti-immigrant language is not American,
they couldn't be more wrong.
You've really gotten bitten by the political fever, huh?
Yeah, I've just been lost.
You've been enjoying the, you like the political, you like what's happening this political season.
Jesus Christ.
Where are countries that fucking train right now?
You know it was funny, well not even funny, but was when I went to, I was just in England, and I went there and the amount of people who were like...
What's going on?
Yeah, they were so, they're so like, but don't you see how like crazy that is?
And then a Muslim mayor has just been elected in London.
And those, to see some of those same people be like, yeah, I think he's hiding something.
You know, I was like, well, we're different, but we're also, I'm sort of supportive of your Muslim mayor.
But it, yeah, it really is, it was so nice to be sort of out of the rhetoric war for a week.
Oh, I bet.
I checked in once or twice and I was like, why am I doing that?
This is going to be such an ugly summer.
Oh, you mean because of the heat?
I agree.
They're saying record highs.
We should actually point out though that I didn't get to see the documentary, but we're...
I did.
So I tickled the documentary that's been done by David Ferrier, the New Zealand journalist,
which we did for, I believe it's episode three of the dollop, which is a story that starts about competitive tickling.
Which sounds sort of fun and cute.
Sounds weird and becomes pretty dark.
Well, he did a documentary about it and I went and saw it and it's fucking awesome.
The preview looks, it honestly like when I, because we're in the preview very quickly.
Yeah, our voices are in it.
But you're just like, you're like, it starts off and you're like, ah, this is the tickling.
And then you're like, oh god.
Oh boy, this really seems to take some turns, which all good documentaries do.
They all start from this place where you're like, this is a fun, simple world.
You're like, who is this guy?
Oh, Jesus Christ.
So check out the trailer.
It's called Tickled.
And then, you know, it's going to be in, I think it'll open up in New York and LA first.
And then I think it's going to 28 different cities.
And if you're not in one of those cities, it's going to be on HBO later in the year.
So tickled.
So tickled.
It's really fucking great.
It's a great documentary.
It looks great.
Yeah.
All right.
We sign cars and cows.
That's new.
We're expanding.
Okay.