The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 287 - The Caning of Sumner

Episode Date: August 8, 2017

Comedians Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds examine the caning of Charles Sumner. SOURCESTOUR DATES REDBUBBLE MERCH

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each week. I read a story from American History. You didn't say your name. I don't need to. To my friend. Garth Reynolds who has no idea what the topic is about or who the other guy on the show is. Welcome to Mystery History. Oh wow. Better name. I am Benito. What? Where's his name? Hula. What? This is... God, do you want to look who to do? I'll do one bottle. People say this is funny. Not Gary Gera. Stay okay. Someone or something is tickling people. Is it for fun? And this is not going to come to Tickly Cloud. Oh yeah. You are Queen Fakie of Haight-Up Town. All hail Queen Shit of Liesville. A bunch of

religious virgins go to Mingle. And do what? Pray. Hi, Gary. No. Is he done, my friend? No. January 6th, 1811. 12 minutes. There's a lot. January 6th, 1811. Yeah. Okay. Charles Sumner. Oh boy. Do you know? Of course not, but it sounds familiar. Was born to Charles and relief Jacob Sumner. What? Relief. Relief? I mean... I'm a product. That's what it says. Relief. I mean, maybe it was auto-corrected, but I, you know, back then... They weren't naming people relief. Worthy? That can't be. That can't have been. That's its own podcast. Oh, what a relief. She came out. That's how it happened. That's a good idea. They were from Boston. Charles was born prematurely along with his twin sister Matilda. Okay. The Sumners could trace their Massachusetts

ancestors to the 1630s. Okay. So they've been around a while. Sure. Many Sumners. Yeah, a lot of Sumners. Charles attended the American Literary, Scientific and Military Academy in Connecticut where he was nicknamed Gawky Sumner. Gawky? Yeah. He wasn't physically great. Okay. So he's just... That's fun. A friend said he, quote, never fished or shot or rode. He had no fancy for dogs or horses. He was without all those tastes that are almost universal with young men. Yeah. Not anymore. No, that's what we all do. We fish, we go shooting, we row, and we got fancy dogs and horses. A horse in my life. I would like you to see my fancy dog. His father paid him to go to Harvard. Paid for him to go to Harvard. Okay. Didn't pay him. Go there. Here's 50 bucks, gotta have it.

All right. Charles missed only three of 580 classes in his first year. Wow. Right? My opposite. Yeah. So his father wrote, quote, it is a little avail to have expensive and learned professors at college if a student does not devote his whole time to the duties prescribed. He's right. He's right. I feel like he did. He missed three out of 580. Oh, that's in reaction? Yeah. So he's like, you missed three? Yeah. Oh, God. Good Lord. I mean, come on. I mean, dad, I get that it's the 1800s, but come on. Honestly. Hey, dad, reel it in. What were you doing? Shooting and hanging with horses? And fancy dogs? Were there fancy dogs there? Answer me. Relief's in the kitchen crying. Look how upset you've made your relief. So apparently they're not a great family. Okay. Charles told a friend, quote,

my own family's lack of interest in my future fortunes leave me despondent. Okay. His twin sister died from tuberculosis and Charles wrote to a friend, I have lost a sister, but I still have other sisters and brothers. My twin is now beyond the show of my affection and regard. Who are his other brothers and sisters? He's kind of the ones. Oh, he does? Yeah, like seven other ones. So he just kind of was like, there's other fish in the sister's sea. I get this was my twin, but there's a bunch more. Come on. Charles, another of his sisters, Julia said of him, quote, there was a world of love and tenderness within Charles, often hidden under a cold exterior or apparently crusted over with a chilling coat of reserve. Okay. So I like what you did there. Throw a little meat out. Lead off. Yeah.

One of his mentors wrote of Charles's disposition, quote, he was totally put off his balance by good nature banter. And when friends tried to joke, his expression was one of total astonishment. Oh, boy. He had no sense of humor and little sense of it in others. Okay. So he's just the guys like, that's funny. All right, I should get going. Good to chat. He never had a comeback. Sorry, I'm going this way. I shouldn't know. And was said to be impervious to a joke. Oh, wow. Okay. Good. Oliver Wendell Holmes said Charles had little imagination, wit or sense of humor. Jesus. And he was a friend of his. So he's really just the he's just the worst kind of sounds like the worst. Quote, if one told Charles that the moon was made of green cheese, he would dispute the alleged fact in all sincerity and give good reasons why it could not be so. So I'm going to take a stab. Everybody's kind of terrible in this argument. I'm going to take a stab here. I'm going to say, I know that's his friend saying that.

Yeah, but it's also the like anybody who's like, the moon's made of green cheese. Well, that guy's also a loser. Yeah. Although back then maybe hilarious. Probably probably had an album. I'm going to say he's on the spectrum. Okay, interesting. That's how I'm feeling. Okay. So when I get these descriptions, I get the feeling that he's got a condition of some sort. Okay. Okay. So in 1834 at 23, he got out of Harvard Law School and Charles traveled to Washington DC. And on his travels, he saw his first group of slaves and wrote to his parents, quote, my worst preconception of their appearance and ignorance did not fall as low as their actual stupidity. Good Lord. They appear to be nothing more than moving masses of flesh, unendowed with anything of intelligence above the brutes. I have now an idea of the blight upon that part of our country in which they live. Give me a little Google translate on what that I think he's saying they look fucking box of rocks isn't so the place that they're living and that has them living like that is a horrible place. He hates DC based on that. You know, he went through Virginia, so, you know, south, right, then. Right. So he's, he's calling that place. He's half a little, he's a little right in hating the town that's doing this, but he's angry for the long reasons.

Yeah, he's also not great. Yeah. After ship to DC, he decided he wanted nothing to do with politics ever. So he opened a law practice. Okay. In 1835, he began reading the abolitionist newspapers and books that were frequent in the north. Sure. East. Sure. He went to Europe in 1839. And when his father died the same year, he decided not to come back. Okay. He toured Europe and met many educated and respected people. He got over the death pretty quick. Yeah, he was like, there's nothing for me to tell him by. He's already gone. What am I going to do? Come back and like not be in Paris? No. He's hanging out with educated, respected people. He was repeatedly told that American slavery was a disgrace, unbefitting of a civilized nation. Okay. And he saw that blacks were treated much better across the continent of Europe. All right. So he's okay. He returned in 1840 and wrote quote, if Southern congressmen continue their infamous bullying of the north, dissolve the union. I think slavery is a sin, individual and national and think if the duty of each individual to cease committing it and of course, of each state to do likewise. Okay. Good.

Yeah. All right. So he's on the right track. Okay. I'm waiting. Something's gonna happen. No, it's gonna be fine. When his friend Henry Wadsworth Longfellow got married. So this is one of his, he's got two buddies, one of them gets married. The other buddy's already married. Okay. So Charles was so upset that his two friends were now married that he kept moaning about it. Oh, I wish you guys weren't married. So Longfellow and his wife allowed Charles to go with them on their honeymoon. What? They took him on their honeymoon? Who would say yes to that? But that's not a thing you throw out there expecting someone to take. How? We were thinking you could maybe come with us on our honeymoon. Are you good with, have you heard of the phrase lube when we're up?

Well, now that is a strange question for a guy that we are asking to come along the kindness of our lube her up. Yes. You're not gonna be involved in anything that happens as far as... I have been asked to come on the honeymoon. No, you have not been... You said we'd like to come on the honeymoon. But I think you took... Did you ask me to come on the honeymoon?

Yeah, but you're not allowed to have any... Okay, so I get to sex your wife. And you do not get to sex my wife? Absolutely not. Absolutely not. Am I coming on the honeymoon? What happens on honeymoon? What do you guys do on honeymoon? We are looking forward to consummating our love.

We have waited a long time. And if you invite someone else on a honeymoon, then we're all consummating the marriage. I shall be in her butthole. You drive a hard bargain, Chuck. Charles continues speaking at public meetings about how wrong slavery was. And I should be able to sleep with my friends' wives. Right, cheer if that's also true. No more slavery and no more knowing my trips with you fornicating.

In 1845, debate started about admitting Texas as a slave state. Charles addressed a huge anti-Texas crowd in Boston. By welcoming Texas as a slave state, we make slavery our own original sin. God forbade that the blood which spurts from the lacerated, quivering flesh of the slave should spoil the hem of the white garments of Massachusetts. Okay, so I... He's saying if they vote for it, they got a fucking dirty hand in slavery. So he is right, he's right.

Again, the words are very... Okay, here we go. Poignant, aren't they? Very intense words, words. Yes? Mmm. His increasingly hard line on slavery put him against Massachusetts Democrats who were concerned pretty much only about their trade with the South.

And also the Whigs who were focused on winning the White House in a couple of years and didn't want to upset people who owned other people. Well, that's, I mean, if you test high with that demo, you can't lose them. In December, Texas was, of course, submitted to the union as a slave holding state. Charles then joined a brand new party, the Anti-Slavery Free Soil Party. Free Soil? Free Soil. Anybody who signs up gets a free pound of sod.

I don't think that's... Come on down! I don't think that's what we... I think we just meant everybody on the soil is free. We're the Anti-Slavery Soil Party! Want a bulb? Okay, again, we're not... If you're willing to knock on doors, you get a few bulbs.

That's fair. And some sod! Okay. Have some fertilizer. I don't want any fertilizer. You're gonna have a beautiful garden. No, I don't have a garden. I'm gonna come over and we're gonna garden it.

I live in an apartment. No slaves, just you and me, soiling together. Okay. I'll tell you what, I can get you a second pound of sod. I don't want anything. Let's get you two pounds. Now I'm totally pro... Let's get you two pounds.

Now I'm totally pro-slavery. How about this? How about this? Now I'm completely 100%. All right, I bet I'm gonna win you back with this next offer. I'm buying that guy over there. I'll buy him. Three pounds of sod.

I will buy that guy, right? Three pounds of sod. In your name. $2,000. In your name. In 1850, California petitioned for admission to the Union as a free non-slave state. Okay. The U.S. had 15 slave and 15 free of slave states.

Okay. Nice balance, obviously. Nice split. And they were trying to make it that way, like they're trying to keep it even. So California is admitted with a compromise that allowed for a much harsher fugitive slave. So they're like, okay, it's even. So if we give you California as another slave state, then you got to give us a way to be meaner to slaves.

And everyone's like, that's cool. So they're like picking dodgeball teams with slavery? Pretty much. That's cool. Now slave owners could reclaim a runaway slave by securing a warrant or arresting the fugitive on the spot. So if a slave is in the north, they're making it easier to go capture that slave. Right.

So whereas before you sort of had that. I'm free. Right. Yeah. The case would be heard by a federal judge who would be paid $10 if a certificate of removal was issued. Meaning if they went for the judge, the judge said, yes, you can take that slave back down the south.

Okay. But if the issue, but if it was denied, the judge only got $5. So in other words, the judge was offered twice as much money to say, this is your slave and not a free man. And so let me just do a little math and math. Hold on. I'm doing a little brain math here. I'm going to guess that these respectable judges didn't let money impact their decision

making. What? What has the judge done that? Wait. There was also no jury and the slave cannot testify and there were no appeals. So basically a dude would just go, this is my slave. I want tender. I mean, he's yours.

In April 1851, the runaway slave Thomas Sims was captured in Boston and returned to Savannah, Georgia. There he received 39 lashes in a public square. Boston and abolitionists in Boston were enraged. And as a response on April 24th, 1851, the Massachusetts legislature picked Charles Sumner for the U.S. Senate. So they do this to the slave. And everyone's like, what the fuck are you doing?

You already captured them. And then their response is, all right, we'll find the biggest anti-slave motherfucker up in this bitch and we're going to throw him up in your sweet house. Plus, he's also probably like, you know, working deals, going like, hey, listen, vote for me and get your pound of sod. You know what I mean? Your pound of sod. You and the family maybe end up with, hey, let's say two pounds of sod fall on your drive.

Let's not ask any questions. Just vote Sumner. You want sod? You get sod, my man. So Charles went to Washington as a congressman. He was one of three free soil senators, which is a tiny minority who were ridiculed for their strong anti-slavery views. Government's always been really accepting.

Oh, look at that. I don't want to own people guy. Like ridiculed. Yeah. It really, it really is crazy because I, in general, like you can see this, the sort of swings that history is going through. Like right now you can tell where a lot of different things are trending, like what most people want are trending.

But these are people who aren't interested, as interested in what history will say about them over how much money they could make. So you have people who are willing to put a timestamp on these crazy bullshit views. Think of all these senators or congressmen now who don't believe in climate change and other ones who are like, how come it's so cold then? Like think of how in 40 years, like you won't be able to say that was your fucking dad. No, you won't. You know?

Unless you, he decided, he decided to wait on speaking against slavery when he got to the Senate. Believing if he cared about other issues, it would strengthen him as a legislator when he finally came around and decided to. So he's working on other moves. So he's like, I won't come here. Since he has the roundhouse. I'm not going to be a one trick pony.

He's right. Right. So I'm going to be a fancy pony. So for a few months he does that. And then finally on July 27th, so he got there in November, so it's been a while, he made a motion to repeal the fugitive slave law of 1850. His fellow senators denied him permission to speak and it was voted against. Finally in August, a budget bill came up for the Fugitive Slave Act.

So he filed an amendment, which procedurally meant they had to let him speak. Okay. And he gave a four hour speech called freedom national. Wow. Quote, slavery is not mentioned in the Constitution. No positive language gives to Congress any power to make a slave or to hunt a slave. I must condemn with my whole soul, the unutterable wrong and woe of slavery. When he was done, Illinois Senator Stephen Douglas accused Charles of assaulting the

Constitution. Oh my God. We are just. I cannot. Excuse me. Sir. Turn around please. Look me in the eyes.

Did you say the Constitution does not say we can own people? All right. Hey, relax, relax. In the eyes. Relax, relax. You're coming off a little. What we all we want, Charles, is for you to sit down, look at the Constitution, and just say that you love it and that you love it, give a little kissy, bro.

And okay, let me, and we would like you to kiss it. Okay. So we're asking you to sit down, look at it, say you're sorry that you love it and kiss it a little bit. No. You are a real asshole. You know that? Okay.

That's against the rules. That's against the rules. You're not allowed to say that. I got some side for you. I'm working my side angle of this character a lot. It's hard. It's hard. It's odd.

In California center, there was absolutely no purpose to this speech, except to incite riots. Charles motion was defeated. Then came Kansas, the territory of Kansas. The Kansas Nebraska Act was introduced, which would leave slavery in the two future states to be decided by a popular vote in the states. So actually letting people decide by a popular vote. That's un-American.

The North was furious. Of course. Thousands gathered at protests. Newly elected. Wait. Why is the North? Because they're scared they're going to vote for slavery. Oh, they're okay.

Sorry. For a minute there, I am thinking what I just thought the people have the right to choose was like, well, obviously they'll go against it. Newly elected South Carolina representative Preston Brooks. I think I'm going to like this guy. His parents were large plantation slave owners, and Preston owned himself more than 80 slaves. South Carolina congress members had to own 10 slaves to run for office. Wow.

What? God damn it, I have nine. That is insane. Can I borrow one of your slaves? I just want to run for off. I want to be. No, that is so crazy. It's not a great look.

I mean, that is so, that is just, that's insane. Right. Like the age. Well, it assures. It assures. Yes. Right. Of course.

The slavery is not going to be questioned. Right. Because a white guy without slaves might be against it. Like a person without slaves might be against slavery. Right. That just might be a thing. That's right. So you're forcing a guy who's against slavery to buy 10 slaves to run for office to be against

slavery. So you say you're against slavery, but you own 10 slaves. Why is that? Yes. But all we do is hang out. Okay. They're my best god damn friends. Preston gave his first speech in the house during a debate over the Kansas Nebraska

Act. Well, he just sounds like the douche in every movie. Preston Brooks. He's a straight out of douche testing. Yeah. Eighty Slay. Just. Yeah.

Quote. The institution of slavery which is so fashionable now to decry. Ah, this is the worst. This is the worst. Has been the greatest of blessings to this entire country. Not only does every section of the South benefit from the sweat of the African slave, but it gives employment to the shipping interests of the East wealth to the manufacturer in the North and a market for livestock of the West.

Without slavery, millions in the North would face bankruptcy and ruin and in utterable miseries. Thousands who now live in contentment and comfort would beg for bread. The history of the African contains proof upon every page in his utter incapacity for self-government. His civilization depends upon his content with and his control by the white man. How can you say of African slaves that you've brought to a country where you've not let them learn or do anything that they're not capable of governing?

You've made my point for me. I don't think I have. Sir, this is why this podcast would just be really like if we could time travel and just go back and just have a quick chat with him. Just a quick chat. Just a quick historical context catch up with old Preston. How did I fare in the history books? Not good.

Not great. In his last attempt to kill the Kansas-Nebraska Act, Charles gave a midnight speech to the Senate after he wrote the quote. This is where they bring the lights down and they go with like black light, right? And there's music. Right, yeah. They put on pink color. Like light just sort of like...

Yeah, yeah. Ladies and gentlemen. Give it up. Pass the blood. Charles Sumner. What's up? What's up? Welcome to Midnight Sumner.

How you doing, anti-slavery? Yeah. Do you have a conscience? Let me hear you say, whoa, there we are, yeah. After the speech... What was it? What's that? That's just the DJ dropping on him.

After he wrote quote, the threats to put a bullet through my head and hang me have been frequent. I have always said, let them come. They will find me at my post. Yeah, I would have left that out. Yeah. I'll be at my post. Come kill me.

I'll be where you think I am. All right. See you then. The same time, at the exact same time, with tension high, during the debate of the Kansas Nebraska Act, runaway slave Anthony Burns was arrested in the city of Boston. Abolitionists rioted, armed with axes and knives. They attacked the courthouse. A guard was shot and killed.

The pro-slavery crowd held Charles Sumner personally responsible for the riot and the death of the guard. Even though Charles Midnight's speech did not reach Boston until the next day after the riot. Well, that's okay. It's hard to put... That's a hard one to put too into the eye. Well, it doesn't seem like math is a strong...

Math or logic aren't strong players in the era. One Southern newspaper wrote that he quote, gave the command. Go! Well, Washington Star accused him of counseling treason and inciting the ignorant to murder the ignorant being people against slavery. Right. Well, they don't get it. When Anthony Burns was marched to the docks, so they take him from the jail or whatever

in Boston to the docks to put him on a ship to send him back down. He was guarded by 1,000 US soldiers as 50,000 Bostonians protested. Wow. This is Boston. They hung big black banners up, they hung a coffin from one with spray painted or painted liberty on it. They probably didn't spray paint. With liberty painted on.

We invented this too. We got a lot going on. The crowd booed, hissed and yelled, kidnappers, kidnappers. Boston's wealthy elite even signed a petition calling for the repeal of the fugitive slave law. Okay. The Kansas-Nebraska Act passed, of course, anti-slavery and pro-slavery groups began competing in the two territories.

Nebraska didn't have much farmland, so slave owners were really not that into it. But Kansas' soil could grow hemp and tobacco. It became the battleground state. Wow. The Massachusetts legislature paid to send settlers with anti-slavery views to Kansas. Okay. As nearby slave-owning Missourians were worried that the abolitionists would then run off with their slaves.

Okay. That's, I mean, that's freeing them, that's called freeing them, if you really think about it. I mean, technically. Sure. Yeah. But either way. Whatever your perspective.

A Missouri senator urged people in Missouri to head into Kansas and illegally vote. Okay. Quote, I can send 5,000 men to cross the border into Kansas enough to kill every goddamn abolitionist in the territory. I advise you, one and all, to enter every election district in Kansas and vote at the point of the Bowie Knife and Revolver. Fine. What is that?

Bring your guns? Yeah. Send, bring your guns when you vote. Cool. Make sure that they get it down. Are we eight years away from that being okay, Ian? I think we're, no, no. Two.

One? Six months. Southern Railroads offered free rides to Kansas. Okay. A pro-slavery committee offered $200 to every suitable person who would settle in Kansas. Okay. People are just fucking getting cash to go to Kansas. Yeah.

In 1855, Charles spoke of slavery again in the Senate. He singled out South Carolina Senator Andrew Butler and Virginia Senator James Mason for their, quote, plantation manners. That's a good one. Meaning? Just, I think you just call them dickheads. Okay. I mean, plantation manners is.

Right. An oxymoron. Both men view the US Senate not as a distinguished body, but as a plantation. Well-stocked, the slave over which the lash of an overseer has full sway. Southern senators were furious at the speech. They seem chill, though. Yep. Southern senators seem to be like.

They seem pretty cool. Like cool dudes. Yeah. Guys you want to hang out with, chat about stuff. Guys you want to hang with and chat with. Maybe you want a guy. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Maybe just, you know, talk about how you have the ownership of human life. Uh-huh. Something seems a little unrelatable about that now. You've kind of done it. No. Yeah. A little bit.

Kansas held its election. 1,500 men were registered to vote, but more than 6,000 ballots were cast. Okay. So that's more than. This is, this is like the ice bowl. If you're not familiar with voting and people, that's more than should have voted. Right. Now this sounds like.

Yeah. This sounds like one of those. It sounds like the Venezuela thing where it's like, how is that even possible? Many by pro-slavery men from Missouri. So a lot of the Missouri guys did what that guy said. They just cruised across and voted. Right. Just went, well.

The legislature called for two to five years of hard labor for anyone possessing an anti-slavery publication. So they, I mean, it's just the addiction to free labor. Like they're like, and if you are supported, you also got to come work for five years. It's, it's fucking crazy. The law also mandated the death penalty for people who induce slaves to revolt. The laws created an atmosphere of violence. An anti-slavery settler was hacked with knives and a hatchet and left at his cabin door.

Three brother brothers were shot by a band of 15 Missourians. Pro-slavery men shaved the head and tarred and feathered a lawyer who had spoken out against election fraud. He was later shot dead in his home. So Kansas is not going great. No, there's a lot of bad relocating. You're like, boy, the neighborhoods changed since this became a battleground state. You should have done the state thing.

Kansas freesoilers organized their own state convention and drew up their own constitution that prohibited slavery. Okay. What's happening now? So the free, they're just, so they just basically formed a different government. We're a new government. We're also, we're also Kansas government. Can we do that?

Can we do that here? We're doing it. Can we, no, we don't have a side one going. Can we do it? We do. There's lots of things we could do. Yeah. Hit me with it.

Well, you could increase the number of justices once you take over. Oh, I know that. That's scary. Do you think, do you think that's scary or okay? I think that, I think that's a very slippery slope. I think that, well, we can talk about it later, but you don't do that really bad things are going to happen. Okay.

They also, the freesoilers also barred free blacks. Okay. So they're the barring and tarring. They wanted Kansas to be a free state, but also a white state. This is like the guy, this is like the person that shows up to like the protest with the like no blood for oil sign and you're like, it's a woman's march, dude, come on, stay on message. The voters approved it by an overwhelming majority.

So the free soil government then asked Congress to admit Kansas as a free state. So now Kansas has two different state legislatures, one allowing slavery and the other not allowing slavery. Sure. So President Pierce asked Congress to admit Kansas as a slave state. And in January 1856, a Kansas resident wrote to Sumner telling him they trusted him or counting on him to do something because he's like the number one guy in the government to get slavery.

The Senate started debating which Kansas legislature to go with in March of 1856. Wow. And New York Senator wrote a bill to admit Kansas immediately as a free state, while another Senator wrote for it to be a slave state. And on May 19th, 1856, Charles Sumner gave his crime against Kansas speech. The visiting galleries in the Senate were packed. It was over 90 degrees at one o'clock in the afternoon he began quote, a crime has been committed, which is without example in the records of the past, it is the rape of a virgin

territory compelling it to the hateful embrace of slavery. The strife is no longer local but national. Even now, while I speak, almonds are on the horizon threatening to darken the land which already palpitates with the mutterings of civil war. He then called President Pierce quote, not merely an imbecile, but an idiot. That's strong. Strong. It came out strong.

Strong stuff there. Okay. So I mean, so he's he's now he's a very like now people are listening to what he has to say. Like it or hate it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

He's definitely definitely one of the leaders of the of the anti-slavery movement. His speech went on for five hours and lasted two days. Did he have an editor? He I think back then there wasn't I mean, he had a cricket match. I think back then there wasn't any TV snow is like, I got it. I got to get home. Everyone's like, yeah. I mean, I can't wait to see what the next five hours have tomorrow.

It's just the first day he spoke for three hours, a second day. He called out senators, Andrew Butler of South Carolina and James Mason of Virginia. These are the two we had previously denounced as plantation manners, right guys. There was not there because he had just had a stroke. Okay. That did not stop Charles. He said, quote, Senator Butler has chosen a mistress to whom he has made vows and who though ugly to others is always lovely to him, I mean the harlot slavery.

She's coming in strong. All right. Here we go. Charles kept using sexual references in his speech using harlot, virgin and rape while he described slavery. Yeah. These are tough. It's tough to some tough terms.

He said Butler, quote, is a buffoon. He shows an incapacity of accuracy, whether in stating the Constitution or in stating the law, whether in details or statistics. Senator Butler cannot open his mouth, but out there flies a blunder. It's a tough thing to say after a stroke. That's one of those things that you look at, you're like, you know, he's had a stroke since I came up with that line. Oh, I did not know.

Oh, I should probably let me turn that one down, maybe get rid of the stuff that flies out of his mouth. A little bit. I'm going to lose all the mouth and hand stuff. Senator Douglas Villanoi paced in the back of the Senate chamber and said, quote, that damn fool will get himself killed or some other or by some other damn fool. Okay, Senator Charles Sumner attacks South Carolina, quote. The requirement that legislators from South Carolina own an estate of 500 acres of land

and 10 Negroes is madness. If the entire history of South Carolina were blotted out of existence, civilization would lose less than it has already gained by the example of Kansas in that valiant struggle against oppression. Wow. He's hitting it. He's hitting it hard. Yeah.

He's hitting it hard. It's a roast. Yeah. And let me tell you something about North Carolina. In the end of the speech, he asked his fellow senators to admit a free Kansas, quote, in just regard for free labor, in Christian sympathy for the slave, in dutiful respect for the founding fathers, in the name of the Constitution and in the name of the Heavenly Father, whose service is perfect freedom.

He then sat down and the Senate went bug fuck. A Michigan senator said the speech was, quote, the most un-American, unpatriotic thing that ever grated on the ears of the members of this high body. Senator Douglas called it, quote, obscene and vulgar, unfit for decent men to read, more worthy of those haunts where ladies cannot go and we're gentlemen. Never read Latin. I'm talking about a fuck room. Yeah.

I mean, good Lord. Never reading Latin. Boy, I really gave it to him there. Are you non-Latin readers? Douglas then asked Charles why he used personal attacks, quote, was it to turn the Senate into a beer garden? Where people don't read Latin. Where senators cannot associate on terms which ought to prevail between gentlemen or was

it simply to provoke some of us to kick him as he would a dog in the street so that he may get sympathy upon the just punishment. Wait, now the dog analogy's out the window too. He's saying he deserves to be kicked like a dog. Yeah, but then he's saying, then the dog gets sympathy. Yeah, well, because if you kick a dog, everyone's like, well, that's fucked up. Why'd you kick that dog? Yeah, but that's not like they're making it sound like the dog is a step ahead.

Okay. Look, I'm on the dog side. No, no, it's fair. It's fair. A New York rep warned the other. These guys should be allowed to kick dogs. And New York rep warned the other Massachusetts senator to protect Sumner because he thought Douglas's comments were designed to get someone to attack him.

Though Douglas is not the only one. Some Tennessee, Tennessee congressman said, said Charles quote ought to be knocked down and his face jumped on to Jesus. These are crazy. What's crazy is a year ago, this would have sounded so much crazier. Oh, now it's. Yeah. Now it's like, yeah.

Okay. And I like that over 140 characters. Charles slipped out a side door and walked to his hotel alone. Just get the fuck out of here. The speech was printed immediately in newspapers in northern cities and pamphlet editions were soon made available in New York, Boston, San Francisco, and Washington, DC. More than one million copies of the speech were distributed. Norther newspapers.

So he went. So this is when you would go viral. You would go pamphlet. He went pamphlet. He went full pamphlet. Did you want pamphlet? You fucking. How'd you go pamphlet on that one, man?

You can't really tell someone how you go pamphlet. I don't know. It's just kind of this like combination of the timing and the pamphlet. I don't know how it happens, but you know, some people are just like, this is a great pamphlet. Yeah. Uh, a northern newspaper wrote of his quote, brave and noble speech, the greatest voice on the greatest subject that has ever been uttered.

The Richmond, Virginia inquire denounced him because he spoke while ladies were present. Oh, I would. Dave, why don't you say ladies were present? I, I was like, this is how I found out about the ladies be present. I didn't know what the hell were they doing quote, just listening women, hearing words like harlot and other words and other words, much like harlot. Uh, so this is another Richmond, Virginia inquire quote, Sumner acted as the public insulter of female delicacy, sensibility and refinement.

The cowardly Sumner stands in stark contrast to the honorable, courageous and manly Andrew Butler. Yeah, you definitely should listen to the pro slavery people as far as, uh, why it was so wrong for women to be there. We're looking out for them. I mean, it really is. It really, it's the core group of bullshitters who pretend they just are able to lie about looking out for people to the nth degree.

Yeah. They don't, they, they don't have it. They don't have the party that goes like, Hey, what the fuck? What if there is hell like what if there is, that'll be really bad for me. At this time, there was a Southern code of honor. Be a douche. It required a reputation for honesty and integrity, for courage and strength and mastery over dependence. Wife, children.

Sure. Slaves, right. People you own. Sure. So a willingness to use violence to defend any slight of reputation as well as any threats to the reputations of relatives. South Carolina representative Preston Brooks was Senator Andrew Butler's second cousin. Okay.

And he was in the same chamber for the speech. Oh no. According to the code. What will Preston be doing? Senator Butler was obligated to whip Charles Sumner. He was obligated? Yes. Senator Butler was obligated to whip by the code, by the Southern code.

Okay. He was obligated to whip him. Okay. But sorry, that is hard to figure out, right? I'm not crazy. No, it's that shit insane. Okay. Thank you.

But Butler was 60 years old and he just had a stroke. So Preston Brooks decided that quote, I'll whip. It is to be my duty to relieve my cousin Butler and avenge the insult to my state. He didn't think Charles would be up for a duel because he wasn't gentlemanly enough. Right. He considered using a horse whip to flog Sumner but was worried that Charles would grab it from him because Charles was bigger. Okay.

So he settled on a wooden cane with a gold head. To hit him with, so, sorry. So now he's the penguin? So he's just gone through, he's had, okay, so there's three options. He's like, I can whip him, but he's big. So that probably isn't going to work. Yes. Maybe I'll just get a cane with a gold head.

Oh. And is the gold head to hit him with, no, the gold head's just because he's a fancy boy. Yeah, it's a fancy boy. Okay. Yeah. Well, I'm not going to cane with a regular cane. Brooks needed a cane because he had a leg injury from a duel 16 years earlier.

Okay. He told his fellow South Carolina reps that he quote, planned to disgrace Sumner with a flagellation. Well, I'm sorry. He's going to beat him. Oh, sorry. I thought, sorry. A flagellation?

No, but he's going to fart on him. Look, we all hear things. And perhaps when you hear things, you get a quick vision of what that could possibly look like at the Southern gentlemen is here. Alrighty. Like that? Hey, look, let's, we don't need to be, we don't need to go there. The morning after this, but we have young listeners.

I mean, there are people who say they let like their eight year olds listen. They must write, they probably right now are like, boom. Right now I'm God in that car. The morning after the speech, Preston Brooks waited outside the Capitol, but Charles did not come the day after Brooks and a friend again waited for Charles outside the Capitol. Again, they did not see him. Okay. Now on that day, both houses of Congress are joined early for a funeral.

So Brooks went to the Senate chamber and tried to get the sergeant at arms to remove a female visitor who was there. The sergeant arms refused. So Butler just because well, Butler was forced to wait an hour for her to leave before he could attack. Oh, Jesus. You can't attack it with a lady. I can't beat him with a lady present.

I'm a gentleman is unreal. Rules are rules. I can't hit a man with a stick with a woman here. That would be insane. Look, what sounds crazier? Charles was signing copies of his speech at his desk. How you doing? Who should I make it up to?

What? Thanks for getting the pamphlet. You know, really appreciate it. You know, every pamphlet helps a lot. So that's really biggie. Thank you so much. Hey, man. How you doing?

Almost. You want me to sign it? No. No sleep till hippo. Okay. Butler approached and said, Mr. Sumner and Charles Sumner raised his head. He'd never met Butler. Yes.

I'm waiting. That changes to Butler Brooks. Sorry. He'd never met Brooks. Brooks. He'd never met Brooks. So, quote, Mr. Sumner, I've read your speech twice over carefully. Thanks so much, man.

What do you want me to sign? It is libel on South Carolina and Mr. Butler, who is a relative of mine. So it's to Butler? Is that just one tea? Brooks then hit Charles Sumner on the top of the head with the small end of the cane. Ha-ha! Quote, intending to put him on his guard. But he did more than that.

Charles lost his sight. Oh, Jesus. Brooks then hit Charles again and again on his head and face with the heavy end of the cane. Oh, God. So it was for hitting. He is using the gold part. Yeah.

Charles could not get up because his legs were pinned under the desk. Oh, God. Around a dozen blows to the head. His face was now covered in blood. Charles trapped legs, finally pulled the bolted desk from the floor. What? He staggered down the aisle as Brooks continued to beat him on the head. Oh, Jesus.

God. Quote, to the full extent of my power, I piled. I piled him so rapidly that he did not touch me. Brooks Cain snapped from the beating, but he continued hitting Charles with the splintered piece. God damn. Charles cried out, oh, Lord, oh, Lord, oh, and stumbled around the seats and began to fall.

Brooks then grabbed Charles by the lapel and held him while he hit away. God damn. What is this? Southerns. Is she? In the chamber shouted, go, Brooks. What the fuck? Yeah.

What? And give the damn abolitionist hell. As the beating neared an end, Brooks said, quote, some number was entirely insensible and bellowed like a calf. But he's pretty chuffed with himself, huh? Yeah, he's pretty fucking happy with himself. A reporter and a group of man ran to stop it, but as they got near, one of Brooks's friends pulled out his own cane and raised it up and yelled, let them alone.

God damn, let them alone. Brooks continued hitting. He said he did not stop hitting Sumner, quote, until I had thrashed him with about 30 first rate strikes. God damn. I repeated it until I was satisfied. No one interrupted, and I stopped simply because I had punished him to my satisfaction. And Congressman finally came over and stopped it.

Thanks for all your help. Hey, thanks, guys. Thanks for jumping in. A friend of Charles caught him and stopped him from falling, quote, full on the floor, head and face covered in blood, his feet in the aisle. He groaned at first and then went silent as senseless as a corpse for several minutes, his head bleeding copiously from the frightful wounds and the blood saturating his clothes. The attack had lasted 60 to 90 seconds, which is, if you've ever seen a fight in real life,

it's really creepy to watch, but 60 to 90 seconds is unbelievable. Well, it's crazy how long that is if you're fighting. We did this thing, me and Evan did this thing once where we went and did like MMA training for our travel show and fought each other. And we did, we did three one minute rounds. Yeah. And you're exhausted. It felt like 30 minutes.

Like that. It's such a long time when it's, you're talking about physical violence, it is a lifetime as far as the impact you can have. Preston Brooks's friends took him to a side room. He noticed the cane's gold cap was missing and asked someone to find it. So he's, he's handling this fairly well. I'm missing the bottom. The part that goes.

Preston, you're the victim. Maybe it might be in his head. Oh, I'll go check his brain. He told his brother, quote, I wore out my cane completely, but saved the head, which is gold. Cool guy. Brooks had cut himself swinging above his eyes, swinging his cane. So he banished his above his eye and he, and then he left walking down the street.

Colleagues helped Charles up and gave him a glass of water. That'll do. He staggered towards the side room and said, quote, I cannot believe that a thing like this was possible. And then he asked someone to find his hat because I have to go outside. You see, I don't want to be a monster. Dave, I don't, I don't want us to talk about the hats anymore, but the idea that you just had 31 straight strikes go into your head with a gold crust, your head, the place where

the hat's going to go like a rock. You're going to hit with a rock. Yeah. I mean, you should be wearing an ice hat. Yeah. And he's like, I'm possibly brain damaged. Yes. Well, let's get the hat and get to the hospital, gentlemen.

I know the order of how things should work here. Find the hat. If we don't find the hat, he might bleed to death. Give him someone else's hat. No, I'll look ridiculous. I'll look like a damn fool. Preston Brooks was arrested first. Look over near where you found the cane head.

Could be around that area or taking a fall there. Preston Brooks was arrested for assault, but was immediately released on $500 bail. Thank God. He wrote to a brother the day after, quote, every southern man is delighted and the abolitionists are like a hive of disturbed bees. I expected to be attacked this morning, but no one came near me. Hey, things are pretty good. You must not tell this to mother.

Don't tell mother. Don't tell mommy. Everything's fine, mother. The cane's fine. How's his mom going to hear that he beat up a guy on the Senate floor? Yeah, no, that doesn't spread. News of the beating swept across the country. Brooks' hometown newspaper wrote, quote, hit him again.

Okay. Ready? We feel that our representative did exactly right. Are you serious? What else could the Massachusetts scoundrel's senator expect? What I just, look, what he said, what did he say when he went back into the chamber before he asked for his hat? I can't believe this happened or something.

I can't believe this. This would be possible. Yeah. Another paper wrote, quote, Brooks had thrashed Sumner 50 times, but we believe the number is exaggerated. It would be very much doubt that Brooks would exceed the legal number of 39 lashes. Oh, okay. So sorry.

The South Carolina Enquirer wrote, wait, wait, there is a legal number of lashes? Yeah. Apparently in the South, by the gentlemen, in the South, by the Code of Honor, the Southern gentlemen's code, if you were offended in some way, you could then legally hit someone 39 times. 39 times you could hit someone. 39 with a whip or a cane, because that's normal. It's part of the new 40s too much campaign.

The South Carolina Enquirer, quote, well done. Oh my God. Richmond paper, quote, nothing in this world but to cow hide bad manners out of him or good manners into him. Sumner in particular ought to have 39 every morning. Oh, right. So we're just getting worse and worse. I'm waiting for a hero who won't be landing.

Papers describe Preston Brooks as chivalrous for avenging Senator Butler and Southern honor. Unreal. I mean, part of me really thought that there would be outrage over this. They said he was now among the heroes of his country and we're seeking to restore the Senate the dignity and respectability from which the abolition senators were stripping. We're so stupid. We are just so fucking stupid. Just fucking idiots.

We are just so dumb. Why do we have to pretend? I mean, we're just, we're just, I mean, we have to just acknowledge that we just have a huge pocket of dumb and we can't penetrate it. It's like another planet that has us force field around it and we're, I mean, essentially we have like a North Korea inside of ourselves. We just have this pocket of dumbness that we can't change and we're just like, all right. So we'll figure it out.

We'll just rearrange the furniture again and then maybe they won't fire bomb the apartment. Pro Brooks Rally's full of Southerners were held in Washington, D.C. and South Carolina. He got hundreds of canes as gifts. Oh, God. Charleston merchants bought him one inscribed with, hit him again, University of Virginia students, arranged to sell Brooks a cane head that had quote, a hefty gold handle, which will be suitably inscribed and also bear upon it a likeness of the human head, badly cracked and broken.

So they're going to give him a cracked head as like a way to go. Yeah. Came with a cracked head. Use it on heads again. Look what you did to this human. Can you imagine being like someone who has, who disagrees with him being around like, you're going to get 39, he's going to beat you mercilessly. You're going to get good felid.

Now, we could also take a step back here and say, if this is what they say about a senator, now think about what they were actually doing to black people, Southerners in the Senate Chamber had picked up pieces of the splintered cane and they were fashioned into wooden rings, which were then worn by Southern congressmen. Oh, flagpins. Nations were different in the north. Hundreds wrote to Sumner to convey their sympathy, anger, shock and indignation. Overnight, the cane attack convinced thousands of moderate Northerners to embrace abolitionism.

Okay. Thank God. Northern newspapers called Brooks a cowardly scoundrel and the caning one of the nation's most infamous events. They said the attack was without parallel in legislative history. The New York Times, the blow struck at Sumner took effect upon freedom of speech in that spot where without freedom of speech, there can be no freedom of any kind. Boston wanted even more, quote, the bully Brooks should be dealt with.

He ought to be mercilessly kicked from one end of the continent to the other. What a single creature has done today, a hundred equally barbarous mid temp tomorrow. What does the future hold for the country if by the persuasive arguments of the bludgeoned, the Bowie knife and the revolver, a member could refute and silence any member who may dare to utter his personal convictions? All good points. Pro Sumner rallies of thousands were held in New York. How's Sumner doing?

Gathering. Oh, you're just pushing. And indignation meetings were held in Philadelphia, Albany, Cleveland, Detroit, New Haven, Providence, and almost every city in small town in the north. Cleveland's caught on fire, right? Yeah, obviously. In many places, Preston Brooks was hanged in effigy. Okay.

On May 27th in the Senate, a northern senator said in a speech that Sumner had been struck down by a brutal murderous and cowardly assault. Senator Butler, who had just arrived back from his stroke vacation, stood up and shouted, you are a liar. To who? To the guy who said that Sumner had been down, but of course Butler's remarks were struck from the record. Oh, of course.

Two days later, Preston Brooks issued a written apology to the Senate for attacking Sumner inside the chamber. I was going to say, I thought that there would be some level of regret at some point. I was hoping. But he also claimed he had to assault Charles, where he did because he had waited outside for two days. Oh, well, now that they know he had to wait outside for two days. Quote, the Senate had adjourned for more than an hour previous to the assault.

He said he didn't have much of a choice after Sumner's verbal attack on Senator Butler in South Carolina. Oh, my God. He also said he had nothing but, quote, high respect for the Senate. Oh, my God. I really thought you were going to say for Sumner, but it wouldn't surprise you the height of bullshit. A Senate committee formed and concluded that the canning was, quote, a breach of the privileges

of the Senate. Unfortunately, since Brooks was not a member of the Senate, but a member of the House, the Senate had no jurisdiction for punishment. Oh, my God. On June 12th, South Carolina Senator Andrew Butler delivered his first major speech since his honor and reputation had been tarnished by Sumner three weeks before. Butler said that Sumner had suffered just flesh wounds, quote, which ought not to have detained him from the Senate vanity, perhaps has kept him from his Senate duties, but little

else being a rather handsome man, perhaps he would not like to expose himself by making an appearance. Sure. Sure it's sure it's vanity. The first Republican convention. You'd look cool if it was a vanity thing, right? Show up with a couple of cuts and bruises too. What's up, motherfuckers?

Shit got weird in here. Oh, yeah. I walk with a cane now. The first Republican National Convention was held on June 17th, 1856 in Philadelphia. There were 600 delegates. Is there audio of it? The object. That would be amazing.

The objective of the new party was to overthrow slave power. Someone yelled three cheers for Sumner and the crowd cheered it over and over and over. But Sumner was not there. He was confined to his room in his bed. He was lonely and debilitated. He wrote a shaky letter to Henry Wasworth Longfellow, quote, my fingers are quite unused, unused to the pen. Massachusetts offered to pay his medical expenses, but he told them to send the money to the

cause of creating a free Kansas. Charles's doctor reported a wound on the right side of the head, an inch which had not healed. There was also a, quote, pulpy feeling on the head. And he was worried by Sumner's unnaturally excited state. Charles complained to his doctor of, quote, oppressive weight or pressure on the brain, which intensifies when he converses and becomes excited. He is lost both flesh and strength. His appetite is irregular and he often lays awake at night in terrible pain.

On July 7th, 1856, Preston Brooks stood trial for the caning of Charles Sumner. He was charged with assault instead of attempted murder. Brooks objected to Charles not being there and hinted that he had overstated the severity of the attack. Other lawmakers testified that Charles had committed an offense by making his speech and therefore Brooks was within his... Sure. Well, he was under 39.

He came in under 39. Yeah, under 39. So I don't know what the deal is. He didn't hit par. Right. He did not hit par. Yeah. The judge found Brooks guilty and gave him a fine of $300.

I'm assuming that's all that I'm going to hear as far as the punishment goes? He paid on the spot and walked out of court. No. His supporters then raised $300 to reimburse him. Oh my God. The House debated whether or not to expel... It's a cane starter. The House debated whether or not to expel Preston Brooks.

A Tennessee congressman said that Brooks, quote, instead of deserving punishment, merited the highest praise. Mr. Sumner did not get a hit more than he deserved and he, as well as some members of this House, deserve a good whipping. So he's saying let's beat up more people. Yeah. No, he's, yeah. He wants to live in America.

Yeah. That's what he said. After six days of debate over Brooks, the House voted 121 to 95 to expel Brooks. I mean, minor, minor justice. That was 23 short of the necessary two-thirds majority. That's got to be, by the way, oh, shit, what? Oh, God. Really.

You're really threading the needle there, Anthony. That was just, when I wrote that, I was so happy. I mean, yeah, I mean, it's like we've worked on that. Yeah. But that was like you doing a verbal double take. Oh, absolutely. I don't even remember what the hell I was going with, but I was like, could you, Matt, know how, what, why?

So Brooks was not expelled. Brooks then. This is what I was going to say. How awkward would it be if you voted against him and he had to stay in? That's when I was like, ah, he's out. Now you're like, good. You got the king. Majority.

121 to 95. But still, now you're like, okay, guys here. Preston Brooks then stood up and addressed the house and argued that he shouldn't be punished because it happened in the Senate chamber, not the house. So now he's like mad that they, that even though he's not expelled, no, the victim, he's the victim. He then resigned because he was angry at those who wanted to expel him. Well, I mean, we'll take it.

We'll take it. He's out. We'll take it. Two weeks later. Oh, boy. He resigned. I held a special election to fill the seat. Preston Brooks ran unopposed and won.

What? He was now a member of the House of Representatives of the United States of America. Wait. So now he's, he's in the wasp's nest? I'm back, motherfuckers. He's, I mean, he, he, he, they kicked him out, but then they couldn't because they didn't have, they were like a few votes short. So then he got mad and resigned and then two weeks later and then comes back unopposed.

That's how much they love me. Yeah. I mean, he, yeah, he's, he's like his Easter. Our country is a ridiculous shit pile. We'll prove it. A Richmond, Virginia newspaper wrote a story, a story titled Possumming. For our part, we never have believed that Sumner was sufficiently hurt to make it necessary for him to take to his bed at all.

The well deserved. He had a pulpy head. Well deserved caning was not so severe that it would detain him in confinement for more than a week. Scared Sumner back to his feet by appointing a committee of one Southern man to assess his condition. It would be enough to impart to the possuming wretch of the strength to enable him to rise up from his bed and walk even to Boston.

This sentiment was repeated in newspapers all across the South. No, with no, no, just no proof, no idea what's happening. Just that's what I say. Yeah. No. I mean, and he got hit 50 times potentially a lot. I mean, I mean 60, 90 seconds of hitting. I mean, come on.

That's a lot of fucking. And you're like, come on, should be a week. Charles turned down. It just got hit with a gold goose. I picture a ghost, Charles turned on invitations to appear at Republican conventions. I can't. My brain hurts. I'm I'm mushy now.

So I'm mush Preston Brooks appeared before 10,000 people at a rally in South Carolina. He was presented with more canes. One report said he received quote a wagon load, a wagon, Jesus, then Northern Republicans began linking bleeding Kansas and bleeding Sumner in the public's mind. OK, so they've started a PR campaign. Sure. Quote, for the North to witness one of its best men butchered in Congress, it offers

us an opportunity to see the aggression of the slave power in action. The South was being seen in a whole new light. More uncivilized than anyone had previously imagined. A New York conservative, quote, it was not the act itself, horrible as it was that excited me, but the tone of the Southern press and the approval, apparently, of the whole Southern people. The New York Times, quote, the caning confirms that the South will stop at no extremity of violence in order to subdue the people of the free states and force them into a tame

subserviency of its own domination. While Summers' beating had done more than his words ever could, their exuberance at a man's violent thrashing is their undoing because they are exuberant. Yeah. There's no other word to describe what they are. They are thrilled beyond words that a man was beaten with a weapon. Republicans won 11 Northern states in the 1856 presidential election, though Democrat James Buchanan won the presidency.

But a worried Southern Democrat said, quote, the cane which broke Mr. Summers' head has turned more votes than all other causes that were at work. Another said, quote, Preston Brooks deserves a statue from the Republican Party. That cane has secured a success to the agitators, which they never could have accomplished without him. Now, let's also stop here to point out that the thing that's come up a couple of times is that moderates didn't want to vote against slavery because they wanted to keep their businesses going.

It took a white man being attacked to turn the North against slavery. Howdy-do. At this point, Brooks confided to a fellow congressman that he was, quote, tired of his new role and heart sick of being recognized as the representative of bullies, the recipient of their gifts and the testimonials of admiration and regard. So now he doesn't like the fact that he's been typecast as the fucking monster that he is. He's costanzant.

And now he's looking around and seeing all these people who are drooling that he beat a man and he doesn't like it, even though he beat a man. Right. In his debilitated condition in January 1857, the Massachusetts legislature unanimously re-elected Sumner to the Senate. On January 28th, 1857, Preston Brooks died. He was 37. Wow.

He had been suffering from a sore throat. Doctors declined to use leaching and blistering, and some there claimed his death was needless and that a few leeches could have saved him. He died from a sore throat? I'm sure he had, like, a strep throat or something. Still very crazy. I can kill you. A strep throat and totally fucking kill you.

Don't get angry at me. I can fucking kill you. Relax. The official telegram announcing his death stated, quote, he died a horrid death and suffered intensely. I'm okay with that. Thousands attended the funeral in DC. In South Carolina, his body was laid out, uncovered, so people could pay their respects.

A Southern paper, quote, his friends, relatives, and devoted slaves might look their last on the beloved form. What kind of preposterous universe are they living in? It's so fucking insane. Where you think that, I mean, beloveds, oh, there's my wonderful master who owns me. Oh, man. I'm sure gonna beat the shit out of this thing with a cane. The delusion that they lived under.

His body was frozen, which allowed the viewing. Brooks left no will, so everything he owned was sold off. 3,000 bushes of corn, 46 bales of cotton, 80 slaves, et cetera. A month later, Charles decided to go to Europe to restore his health. For two and a half years. Oh, boy. The Republicans love that. He then came back to DC for four months, but found he was unable to function.

So it's been three years now. Yeah. Quote, I cannot work with the mind except in very narrow limits. At times I feel almost well, and then after a little writing or a little sitting in the Senate, I feel the weight spreading over my brain. So he had like, you know, there was a, I always remember there was a great LA King's hockey player named Dead and Marsh, of all names, but he got a really brutal concussion. It was like two years later, he couldn't walk, he couldn't walk from one concussion.

Think about, I mean, yeah, I mean, you know, like if you have a head injury that's bad enough that it changes your life completely. And he was also in Washington mad seeing Northern senators being nice to Southerners, who he called, he called his assassins. In August 1858, Kansas voted to reject slavery. Once it reached the required population, it would be admitted as a free state to the union. Charles Sumner returned to Paris. He was treated by a doctor with quote, fire treatments.

Okay. So when do you what would you like to hear? I'm just picturing. Would you like to hear about fire treatments? I'm nervous. The doctor applied a flaming compress made of rolled cotton wool to Charles Bear's skin, burning the length of his spinal cord. This was supposed to be so slow, stop.

So he's just lighting his back on fire. Well, it's fine. He's making his he's making him a fire spine guy. He's burning. We're talking just skin. He's burning his. He's just burning his spine skin that's over his spine. He's burning his spine skin.

Okay. Just setting a guy on fire. Continue. Continue way. This was supposed to reduce excess fluid in the brain and spinal cord easing the pressure on the back. Charles thought it was great. He went through it and thought it was great.

Kept doing it. He liked it. Okay. Although it probably took his mind off the brain pain. Was that probably, I mean, that might be part of the solution here pain is a god damn my back is killing me pain is a very tricky thing. And there's a lot of research that there's a mind over matter thing that there's a lot of like stuff being done that's well, but also it is totally true that if you have a

point of severe pain, eliminate it, you are like, there's other pain. Yeah. There's different pain. I found no pain. Hurts. What? What head in November, 1859. A bit improved, Charles came back to DC and wrote quote, this is a barbarous place.

The slave master seemed to me more ever, more than ever barbarians in manner, conversation, speeches, conduct, principles, life. All things indicate a crisis. There is now little communication between the two sides and the bonds of union are weakening. Republican party leaders wanted Charles to stay quiet. They did not want him saying anything that would upset moderates. There's that term after Abraham Lincoln's 1860 presidential nomination, Charles gave a four hour speech titled the barbarism of slavery.

This was four years after his caning quote slavery is nothing less than a huge insurrection against the eternal law of God between slavery and freedom. There is essentially incompatibility. After the speech, South Carolina Senator James Chestnut responded, after ranging over Europe crawling through the back doors to whine at the feet of British, of the British, craving pity and reaping a harvest of contempt, this slanderer of states and men has reappeared in the Senate. I hope Mr. Sumner, after the punishment he received for his insolence, would have learned

propriety and manners yet clearly this has not occurred. He is the incarnation of malice and cowardice. How? How? How are you? OK, go ahead. Charles then said he would print the senator's remarks in an appendix to his speech. That's pretty good.

And had the guards escort him out. Oh my God. He was escorted around Washington by guards the whole time he was there. Because at that point he knew everything you fuck or say is just hurting him. Yeah. Now you've gone too far. So now all your shit. If you want to sit here and say that I was a coward being beaten, it's just going to

hurt you. Right. I'll tell you what I think. We need to light a fire on the spine of our government. Oh, buddy. And we got to change the way our brain expi- I lost it. I lost it. Lost the thread.

The Chicago Tribune wrote, Sumner's speech was the most masterly and exhaustive argument against human bondage that has ever been made in this or any other country since man first commenced to oppress his fellow man. Southern newspapers were not as much into it. With a real chance of a Lincoln presidency, Republicans feared the speech would, again, alienate moderate voters. So they were worried it would alienate voters if he came back and now they're worried that the speech will alienate them.

They're great. The next month, 3,000 people came to hear Charles speak in New York City. He spoke for two hours. The speech was printed in pamphlets and circulated all around the country. He's dropping another pee. In the fall, the Republican committee circulated his barbarism of slavery speech as a campaign document. As a document to run against.

No, to run. They finally come around and they're like, all right, people, yeah, I mean, eventually they see so many people being like, yeah, that they're like, okay, this will, we did some polls and they're moderates. So candidates everywhere wanted him to come and speak, Lincoln won. On November 10th, South Carolina called for a state convention to vote on secession. Other states followed by April, the Civil War had begun. On April 18th, Charles saw a large violent crowd in the square in front of his hotel

in Washington. He went through a side door and was told by the manager that he had to leave. But Charles had already paid. So he was moved to an attic room and the crowd eventually dispersed. In 1872, Charles was asked by a friend how he felt about Brooks, quote, he was the unconscious agent of a malign power. It was slavery, not he that struck the blow. Charles Sumner died on May 11th, 1874 of a heart attack.

His friends declined an autopsy on Sumner's body. So the extent of his injuries from the caning is not known. 90,000 people over two days viewed his casket. They got to get that Nigerian CTE doctor to get that branch. Yeah. Chibis were printed in many newspapers as well as in Europe and the southern Carolina flag was lowered to half staff in his honor. Wow.

That's interesting. Well, let's remember it's after the war. Still. Is that a Confederate flag? Well, I mean, you're talking about, there's that period where before Jim Crow lost kick in when there's actually, it's looking like, hey, this might be a place where everything's good. Yeah.

Fun run. July 26, 2107, Representative Buddy Carter of 2107. Sorry. Sorry. So this is. July 26. 90 years. Yeah.

Yeah. This is the. I didn't miss. This is our first. It's not the future. It's our first follow. July 26, 2017, Representative Buddy Carter of Georgia defended President Trump's criticism of Senator Lisa Murkowski of Alaska during the healthcare debate, quote, I think it's

perfectly, perfectly fair. Let me tell you, somebody needs to go over there to that Senate and snatch a knot in their ass. Snatch a knot means to hit them or whip them. I heard that. I didn't know what that meant. He said that about a woman. Yeah.

Well, Southern guy said that about a lady. So what? So. Well, at least there's no parallels. You know what I mean? Yeah. At least we've. There's not.

At least we've left all that in the past. That's the cool thing. I just don't. The cool thing is now we live in a country where we can talk to each other and get along. And right now there's not a hashtag on this day slash civil war. Wait, a hashtag civil war that is being spread by James Woods and other people of that ilk saying that that it's time for a civil war on Twitter, leaders of this sort of group of people.

What? Where? I mean, where is this going to end? This is just going to turn it. This is. This is. Boy, we are at a real. We are in the eye of the storm right now, and it's just not clear how this shakes out.

It doesn't end well. It ends poorly. We are. We all know it doesn't end well. Everybody can feel it. I mean, there's just most of us are on the same page in some way. We just have a huge fucking problem under the fucking rug that we are. And we're talking.

Yeah. I mean, we're like we live in an apartment with a cobra. Like we we're just how is it's going to bite us when it's going to bite us? We don't know for sure. Yeah, but the cobras there's a cobra and it's snakes on the motherfucking plane. Yeah. Yeah. It doesn't end.

It's not going to end well. So Australia will be fun. Fun to get over there for a stretch, have a hang, hashtag civil war, remarkably responsible thing to do. Well, it's going to be a dollop. We signed. It's just going to be one. You're going to have to carve into a tree.

We signed cans.