The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 298 - Lasseter's Reef (Live in Perth)

Episode Date: October 24, 2017

Comedians Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds examine the quest for Lasseter's Reef at the Astor Theater in Perth, Australia  SOURCES TOUR DATES REDBUBBLE MERCH

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so clear you know what I mean Dave? It's a solid Gaza. Hi everybody thank you very much for coming out we appreciate it it's lovely to be here short flight from New Zealand and just a jaunt yeah you guys really picked it why would you live so far away from far you guys moved far what is the point why we're happier here but you just you moved far you really we could be everyone else is like close to each other they're not this far and what the fuck was your problem no that's how we're starting now berating the city no it is great to be here did you do anything today sure isn't this where we do small talk we don't

have a guess so we got to like figure out something real quick that's awkward right in the middle huh did it go through everybody excuse me pardon me excuse me hi we came late but we're in the middle so I got weird I did I did laundry with some Germans okay cool maybe I should talk I walked past one of those birds that attacked people with it the magpie and it turned to me and started screeching you know I'm gonna lose an eye and now that didn't happen it just looked at me and we screamed at each other as long as you're screaming back that means you're not crazy well the thing about it I come from bear country so I know to make

myself big wanted a predator starts looking in the eye so I made myself big and I let it know that I was bigger than it and that fucking magpie how'd you make yourself big if you've ever seen the karate kid I don't have to go into the stance but that's how you make yourself look big yeah that's how you handle a magpie situation put the arms up yeah you have legs no I know the stance at least one crane so it's a crane versus a magpie okay it's a crane bigger than a magpie in your case yeah so what did I do I made myself bigger than a magpie good talk I mean we have good talks and then we have great talks and this was a good

one that's good to know you let me know how you handle the threat when it comes at you a magpie what people say is you're supposed to look at it it's just to stare right at it and then it's like not too easy motherfucker I like a challenge I'm not falling for this so I have my plan is right on them what am I looking at yeah right on them you're gonna look at them you're gonna get on them huh it depends where we are in the attack I mean I'm gonna start looking at them and if they attack then I'm gonna get on them then I don't know but what's next stop looking at me sorry I was bored

you just started drifting off now I don't want to talk I've heard what I that was unnecessary what do you anything else no I got nothing else no I don't know what no I didn't do I didn't do anything all right so I guess you're listening to the doll-up right this is a bi-weekly American history podcast once a week I I magpie fighter crane related to the first one already why go ahead crane friend and lawn lair honor oh my god whose lawn are you laying on Dave Anthony read the story from American history to a guy Gareth Reynolds who has no idea

what the topic is going to be about let's say you're a guy Dave David and say there's another there's another guy who was he fought in Vietnam he's a pilot and say and say that guy just started calling out for I guess being a pussy during the war okay and not fighting yourself and John McCain who you're talking about I don't know why that I don't know why that person came because if you're talking about McCain and Donald Trump yeah you are and say you're in a fight with a lady in Florida who's a black woman and you can't handle her talking you're talking about Trump

you're talking about Donald Trump no sure now I'm a hundred percent and you can't handle a black woman talking at you like she's an equal so you just keep fucking flipping out losing your mind Trump so much so that you tell your chief of staff to go out and talk shit about her right and then he goes out Donald Trump yeah we've done we've done this you've alluded to this it's not Donald Trump okay so you're this guy right there's a guy right hypothetical man and so I'm saying maybe you should talk to somebody sure maybe there's support for you sure place called Talkspace which is an online therapy

company for just a small price a regular therapy get your own experience license therapist you can say I don't know why the black lady with the where's the colorful hats is talking at me I mean talk to a therapist about these days she she talks to me like we're there is one person who has this issue I don't think so there is I think this is not a syndrome I think it's a very common probably nobody here no nobody here is in a fight no I would say 90 I would say 102% white people here 102% so these people all get it each and every therapist has at least a master's degree and it's complete over 3,000

hours of supervised work to match for the perfect therapist go to talkspace.com slash dollop and to show you support for this podcast use code dollop you get $30 off your first month that's dollop at talkspace.com slash dollop so yeah you're sort of jumping the gun on stuff no that's just about a guy no thank you one guy really enjoyed what just happened yeah they're not drinking though but last time we're here oh they're drinking people were mad oh no it's a Heineken no no I'm sorry hey don't throw anything at anyone what that got a little weird we're told you love it if I point out someone makes a bad beer

choice you'd have to boo them okay we've heard from everybody about fosters do you know who doesn't know people in Austria don't drink fosters nobody the whole world has gotten the message you guys are not quiet about it it's like fosters invaded your country in the 40s and you're still mad why don't you relax a little bit it's just a beer we all have bad beers they named ours America because we're fucking stupid I I think fosters at this point fosters business model must be ironic gifts like that's it it's just like I know you don't like it there you go and then it would laughs and imagine to the garbage who wants a

real beer we all do what a great joke a cracker we'd say well I mean I feel I'm sorry to feel bad for fosters it's just a fucking beer trying to make its way in the world that's the new business model fosters we're going out of business yeah when they're going out of business we'll give another one to Ted another one don't worry okay yeah like this was poking at my cool area okay great nobody asked and we're good doesn't hurt anymore great go ahead and read the date great that's the post that I put on your iPad go ahead and read the date huh you want me to read it there's no you do yeah give me it let's do this shit September

27th 1880 feels good it's weird hearing it like that I I just like normally it's a tad more masculine but I'll take what happened okay I still forgot the date better are you are you in now like and I remember the day yep okay Lewis Hubert Lasseter oh boy some people put their hands in their face a couple of people just started laughing and going oh god was born in the Victorian count country town of fuck this is that near here I mean now I'm trying to do the A's correctly because you guys do your A's like weirdos but Gamby back of me bugaboo this mother Agnes died of Sunstroke when he was very young Jesus that just means

you left a child out no she died of Sunstroke not the kid he's the story who's who's the stories about but that's it guys hope you enjoyed it now did this one's about an infant death well we sometimes start with people who aren't the main person I don't think that's fair and we don't kill them off in a second sentence like we give them a little more time to run around oh I'm sorry to be treacherous of these moments Dave God it's Father Drake heavily and told people that his son was useless yeah yeah we've been there we've both grown up with that I think there's more

people who have that than not that's what gets you going right yeah he ran away from home at the age of nine you know I wonder why yeah I mean look it's not a great house situation and then apparently this was also you know before the 1900s so you could just run away at nine and people be like yeah come live with us and everyone's like no one looks into it or anything you're just gone right sure yeah it's like cats the musical children used to be like cats at 15 he and a man robbed a local store whoa whoa he and a man yeah he found out what kind of weird pairing is this some sort of sling blade action you know he

found a buddy a crime buddy okay grown a grown man with pubes and all that what sorry a fully fully developed male human sure just super rockin cock and all that sure I'm still just hung up on the first the pubes qualifier yeah yeah it's part of growing up okay get a pubic hair okay look forward to it Lassiter was sentenced to six months month oh he stole a he stole he was sentenced to six mums yeah he's stolen he's sent to six mamas he was so he stole the shit and he and they had guns and his dad his foster father whatever was turned him over to the cops okay that's fucked up yeah Lassiter was sentenced to six months

hard labor and two years and a boys reformatory and he escaped within a year okay good so that's working pretty well in the early 1900s he traveled to the U.S. married Florence Elizabeth Scott and became a Mormon oh I'm always a good face anyone who goes to that that's a good face yeah everyone everyone does that you run away to America you join the new religion yep for sure go everywhere the underwear and the golden plates yeah golden plates the rest of his life he would spontaneously burst into burst into American religious hymns it's pretty typical Australian right there with no warning yeah he just fucking

kick him off in any right even you don't know when they're coming right okay that's always fun just yeah all right we're almost done oh boy he's coming down he's coming down the Lord is coming down the Lord is coming down and if we get these other two then I think we could just move move the rest and then we're done uh-huh oh man what do you feel like later ribs did you know Jesus oh he is he when do we get the book of hymns I'm sick of making them up yeah I was I was gonna say this is this is a this is when we learned that you had no religious background whatsoever I went to church

six times yeah I went like eight yep it's all I got yep but what I what I was on a summer vacation my aunt and uncle secretly squirreled me away to church for two weeks put me in some sort of church play that was a weird summer break who were you I had to walk out on stage and say shalom means love and then walk away like you didn't even get a good part yeah I was like I don't know what the fuck is happening I'm like fucking six and now I'm also in a cult sorry you know Perth is very guys honey you guys love you Jesus or whatever whatever they're Muslims mostly someone just yelled oh my god as if that was the worst insult that

they could ever hear and then what they're calling us terrorists so they leased a farm in New South Wales he worked he worked as a reporter in a 1913 he submitted a design for a single-span arch bridge over sit did I mention he came back to no yeah I was sitting on the hems in 1908 he came back to Australia and he's a farm reporter who's just a farm he's a back then a lot of people were farmers slash reporters yeah yeah so big no this can coexist easily yeah all right I planted the corn now I'm gonna rip into some stories do some investigations in 1913 he submitted a design for a single-span arch bridge

over Sydney Harbor for years he would claim the bridge engineer stole his idea and owed him six months of work so he didn't wait that's what he wants back yeah you stole everything from me I want to work for you for six months come on come on don't be an asshole yeah it's not a great if you get threatened by that like you stole everything from me could I work for you just for half a year I just I would really love to work beside you you're a hell of a guy you got a great design I don't know where you came up with it honestly it just seems unbelievable at one point he actually got a job working on the bridge

construction but was fired for arguing about how it should be built yeah I why why that's like having your ex like come up with your wedding like design you know what I mean you're just someone who you don't I mean the whole time he's just gonna be like that's how you built this shit hey you were told to not say that sorry yeah but I you know if you see my drawings I did I thought of this look at these but he didn't like he didn't actually do any this doesn't matter if it's just he's insane so you don't bring him to the party okay you don't want his notes yeah that's fair during World War one last year tried

three times to enlist in the army first he was rejected then he was accepted then he was discharged as medically unfit then he was accepted again then discharged on the same day for being quote mentally deficient boy so that's a that's a big day that's why did he get let back in the first time what did he prove he must have lied there's a lot of lying back then to get into the army at least in America you just go now I'm Bert maybe like where you just in line he was probably just being like you know I came up with the army I was the guy who

said what bunch of us should get together and find other people you want to see my sketches I got a bunch of sketches check them out yeah yeah you guys only about six months of army by the way I don't want to be weird about this they also so it went on quote he has marked hallucinations wants to giant wait that's a great one yeah well that's serious that's like serious hallucinations okay marked right wants to join get out of here get the fuck out of here he wants to join the flying corps as a friend is going to present him with an airplane wait what I think he was saying that a friend was gonna

give him an airplane so he wanted to join the trying to put the flying part of the what that doesn't matter army no I think to him it did yeah I should be a part of this my buddy's got a plane I think that's part of the hallucination thing they were talking about okay so he's got a Wonder Woman plane yep has he has a peculiar manner and is constantly talking well I mean that'll get you kicked out of most places he left his wife and remarried without bothering to get a divorce what we probably have ten of those people on the dollop now the people who are just like I don't have time for paperwork I love

you Louise let's do it yeah well he's also on the go man he's got a lot of shit to do he's building bridges making armies yeah he's got fake armies fake bridges who knows if his new wife's even real or the first no one knows so he's split with his new wife the second one sure and then married a third in 1924 also it didn't didn't bother getting a divorce at this point I mean he's married three to three different ladies right now so he is Mormon I want you to apologize to the Mormons should I do one of my classic hymns in 1924 he changed his name to Harold Bell Lasseter and settled in Sydney and worked

in a pottery workshop for limbless ex-soldiers there that is packed with juicy details David he changed his name to change his first name his first name was Lewis Hubert and now he's changed his first names to Harold Bell okay weird followed by the last one now he's working in a pottery workshop for limbless ex-soldiers right now when you're working in a pottery workshop yep go ahead seems limb important and you're working with them mm-hmm is it just like a ghost situation well depending on the sort of behind just sort of like there you go that's fun isn't it don't get hard don't get hard do not get I told you

not you got hard he got hard stand up stand up he's hard I know one limb that's working that's exactly what it's like okay continue a he's always struggling with debts Lasseter was constantly writing to government officials with with suggestions and proposals oh no that's how you get on lists yeah during World War one he wrote to the minister for defense with a proposal to overcome the stalemate in Gallipoli you see my buddy has a plane think this could be a game changer for all of us Jackson I can see the plane I'm rejection did not stop him finally a

frustrated official wrote quote it would appear that you are unable to reconcile yourself with the non acceptance of your suggestion this is regretted but the officers who advise are not without experience in these matters none of his ideas were taken seriously letter after letter until October 1929 when he wrote a letter to federal labor MP Albert Texas Green well boy how do you get I should have looked up with Texas yeah what any he just does he was from there anybody knows he from there he was all right fair I don't think I don't I don't think that guy knew that I don't think he's being

honest I think if you listen back to his yep he felt bad for the fact that nobody knew it was not like they was followed by nothing yeah he thought other people are gonna say shit too he'd be drowned out by nose or there'd be a bunch of yes and then he could be like yeah yeah yeah come on obviously anyway if you're listening you can look that up on your home that's homework maybe someone will email us while we're doing the podcast oh that'd be great please more that fill in the gaps dear sir for the past 18 years I have known of a vast gold-bearing reef in central Australia but it is absolutely useless

without water so take it over 14 miles a reef shows values of three ounces to the ton there is no doubt that five million pounds capital can be found in England to work this mine where the water difficulty can be overcome okay now I feel bad because this is just he's just crazy right no what did he has he visited this area well why don't you listen to the story he suggested piping in water and explained he could get it done for under 2,000 pounds wait this is like to get the gold out they got a pipe in water this totally is the spam email pipe in water just the middle of Australia just needs like to 2,000 what is the plan the

plan like a pipe water into our hose probably pretty sweet hose sure and pipe it in and then gold appears well no they know there's gold there you just the you need water to get out of the ground he can't just hit it you can't hit it you have to water it a water that shit so this is gold that you have to water we got a water if you're gonna get into the ground you gotta have some sort of water situation so you need right okay so there's right so there's all that gold and all you need is water because his buddy has a plane you didn't there's no plan he he understands that there's gold there because of just an intuition no

we get why don't you fucking hang on we're gonna but how does he already know okay we're gonna get there all right gonna be so mean why you why you cuz I asked questions cuz I want to know what the fuck is going on did you start asking questions I'm curious I want to know how does this guy know we'll get there okay you're right yeah I just want to know what the fuck he's talking about it was rare but people did stumble into massive gold finds okay but most of all the Great Depression had just hit if true all this gold could create tons of jobs and make people rich so the MP sought a second opinion from a metallurgist

and industrialist with a reputation in the mining industry he did not recommend the government fund the expedition but thought it was worth looking into you mean project water gold yeah right okay he red flagged it okay the report eventually made it into the hands of the prime minister who was totally down probably no and into the hands I feel like we're gonna be watering for gold in America in like four years oh that's what we've been doing I'm pretty sure we just blow mountains up and go hard grab the gold wish I was kidding so into the hands and into the hands of Australia's workers union president who was also

totally into this and also super corrupt I can imagine a union president being corrupt close your eyes try to imagine in March 1930 Lassiter went to the AWU's Sydney office to meet the president Lassiter was now almost 50 he was bald short and stocky with a flat chubby face whoa how's that what yeah so he's just bald short stocky with a flat chubby face okay I like the sound of this character so he's hot a flat face how does your face flat I think you just don't have a lot of things sticking out like a nose they just stop just the weight becomes too much that it just starts drooping on you like a melting

dolly cartoon yeah I think your forehead is probably in a bit so it's even with you I would just never I've never in my life if I would I'd be like you know they got the flat face yeah I've seen flat face people you know flat faces yeah I know flat face mother you got to hook me up I want to meet a couple FFs we could be BFFs will we be BFF FFFs big fucking flat face fucks it's not what the necklaces will mean negative Nancy so Lassiter goes in the room and explains to a group of men that 30 years earlier he had decided to give the goldfields in Western Australia ago now he struck out doesn't seem like the kind

of guy who sits on something for 30 years well we'll see what happened now he struck out from the coast the other coast Queensland which is across the continent of Australia and at that time a walk that had never been done and maybe still not a walk that's been done he got lost as happens when you try to cross a continent and his rations were running out his horse died and that is when he found the reef oh boy so he found golden plates a massive outcrop quote glistening with gold as thick as plums in a pudding so this person just became animated to me this feels like cartoon mirage stuff it might be the real deal

how do you know well I can't ask questions so it's hard to know this could be the story of the greatest gold final Australian history and what happened to those lucky gentlemen oh yeah I'm sure it is 12 oh no oh no I know what's happening we're about to get a posse huh it's 12 feet wide and more than seven miles long so that's a lot of fucking gold yeah gold and you just need to get a sprinkler on it for an afternoon yeah just go ahead little leprechauns what they're just farting gold nuggets and then everything's fine you hose it off it's just all the other stuff falls away sure you have gold it's just like

tomatoes exactly it'll be easy so he filled an oatmeal bag with gold okay sure started back ran out of food and water but was rescued by an Afghan camel ear which was pretty common as you guys know in Western Australia yeah they're the paramedics he went back with a surveyor three years later following landmarks to get there and he found the reef again basically looking for horse bones yeah and when they returned they found that their watches so they go they find the reef they turn around to come back to like you know get the get the exact coordinates but then they're coming back and they realized that their

watches were quote an hour and 15 minutes off which meant the bearings used to calculate calculate the reefs location were wrong okay so that's a that's a problem okay well tough and they they tried to find investors but no one wanted in and eventually the two men drifted apart and the other guy died do you mean drifted apart in life or on this journey no no in life so they came back and they told people about it and everyone's like I don't know you don't know and the person who could corroborate yeah he passed away he passed away from gunshot gunshots right now the men in the AWU officers are

totally sold this is fucking amazing I mean he's got a flat face a good story let's get into business with this guy one guy did some math and there realized there could be 66 million pounds worth of gold so it's a lot of fucking yeah it no for sure it sounds pretty great Errol when real coot who Errol coot Errol coot mm-hmm all right he was a rope he was a reporter and an amateur pilot also a reporter yep wow so much in common he volunteered to be the expeditions aviator so he's like I'll fly this shit my buddy is a plane so this is a great yeah only I could see it so someone check with the Department of

Minds and learn that a reef known as Harding's reef had happened in the same area Harding just happened to be the name of his friend who died okay yeah so maybe it's maybe there's something going on here I mean sure Water Gold Project this gave Lasseter some credibility okay why just because there's a guy with the same name and is that it as the reef so it's like an action like that's not a big deal that's like quite a march just off of that coincidence got the same name as the guy he knew it's quite a coincidence Dave it's just that lives might be on the line the AWU president started making

plans to establish an exploration company he reached out to Fred Blakely Fred had grown up in Broken Hill I don't know I have no idea what that means or why I put it in there occasionally he worked at a slaughterhouse where he was paid in cuts of meat mmm that's always yeah that's great well late 1900s were awesome one for the customer one for the doctor quote a sheep's head a half a dozen tongues perhaps a liver blood must was my weakness what was his weakness blood this is a guy you want with you on a potentially starving journey you know what I like her heads and blood anyway when the going gets tough we'll

figure out after working with all the meat Fred got into mining at the age of 14 which is the right age to start for sure get down there nature's canary yep before 10 year olds down everybody out keep the canary out the kids dead we just saved a little birdie didn't we didn't we use you go to be okay he's gonna be fine my son's dead but you're fine Fred met with Lassiter and start to notice some discrepancies in his story hmm issues well small details would change and there were gaps that didn't really make sense to Fred

and whenever Fred questioned it Lassiter would reply quote if I told you that you'd know as much as I do and you wouldn't want me the best cover that's the best how can I tell you you won't need me if I tell you so I'd buy that I'd be like oh shit he's right all right let's keep following him so Fred was suspicious of Lassiter story but he thought it was worth investigating and agreed to lead the expedition the UWA president set up a meeting with Sydney businessmen who Lassiter told the story to Charles Ohm was a famous aviator and he questioned the watch story and said with adjustments they would that would

just put the reef in the middle of the Indian Ocean shut up asshole come on it's not true trust me it's for sure there it's guys the same name as my buddy who died I mean what more do you need you order it mm-hmm it's a whole thing yeah it's a whole I mean wait this way next time we have lunch don't bring an asshole it's pretty obvious let's get out of here okay my buddy's got a plane Lassiter said he could find the reef by landmarks so the adjustments didn't matter the whole quote if you would see in the country under the conditions I did you would never forget those landmarks this is like Trump when he

talks about sources it's just like you don't there's nothing but you're just like someone said it you're like okay well I mean shit he seems confident I know something I don't the investors roared their approval and Ohm back down he said he wouldn't invest but he'd be happy to provide advice on aerial surveying and everyone in the room applauded quote simpler times well I think that was rousing everybody good work all right off our separate ways we go quote the room buzzed in the pause and proceedings everyone was talking gold eyes were bright lips were being licked work a day cares were forgotten

everyone was gazing through the pearly gates of prosperity and each man was treading along the streets of gold sounds like they're all gonna have chapped lips after this celebration gold gold gold gold my name let's take it to the streets no no no shares shares on the new company sold out in just 48 hours oh boy there's excitement in the air yeah oh yes the central Australian gold exploration company was in business somehow a former royal Air Force pilot Charles Lexi Lexius Burlington was brought on well he was an experienced mechanic and it worked in gold mining through his connections with the British

truck manufacturer thornycroft they're great what how thornycroft they're awesome someone's really having a good time up there he got an expensive six wheeled heavy-duty military-grade truck designed for Middle Eastern deserts Jesus yeah he's not they're not fucking around okay for gold yeah until they get to the end then they're fucking around then they have gold don't they sure yeah if they have enough water to make it grow fuck they're talking about he couldn't he couldn't he tried so hard to hold that in and he thought I was gonna get a bigger reaction really and it finally came out of him and it didn't it didn't

go as well as he thought it would Earl Coot who wanted to be the pilot immediately hated Charles Lexius Burlington well the name's a problem right off the bat it's pretty pretty yeah Charles what's his name Charles Lexius yeah that's fancy plus Coot wants to be the pilot and now this guy's an actual pilot yeah and this guy knows stuff so automatically you're like I don't like him seems smart three word name it's got prick written all over him he's the first one we eat when shit goes south what yeah come on no give it to me get away from me we'll eat him first no

there's no eating of anyone I don't want to eat anyone either but if push comes to shove when we get out there when dangerous choices might have to get made get away from me I'm just saying that's the one we go for I'm not being weird you're just you are weird you're going way too quick to people eating my god I said if okay we'll figure it out when it's time to eat someone whatever okay that's actually a good time to do it great I have a rose ceremony it'll be a whole thing we'll figure it out however you want to do it when we get there just say no fancy pants probably he's got some good meat on the bone but Coot had

led his pilot license laps so he he had to try to get that fixed then out of nowhere Lassiter announced that he would withdraw from the expedition if Charles went along so Charles was kicked out okay but they still had the thornycroft truck oh god wait they just have a toy no they got the actual truck yeah no that's what I mean but now they don't have anyone competent really oh I don't think that'll be a problem like fancy pants was the one person I think it would be like no not like that like this no now they're just gonna be like I can't see that I got beer all over the controls again fuck it we'll figure

down we get there man whoo not seeing that as an issue a team of six men was jump it that's the catchphrase let's jump it then a team of six men was finalized Fred would be the leader Lassiter would be the official guide Coot was the pilot Philip Taylor a young Englishman was the mechanic George Sutherland was an experienced prospector and then there was captor Charles Blakeington Houston who had the water a distinguished British soldier okay the expedition would have air support a military-grade desert vehicle and a portable wireless

transmitter enabling real-time communication with the businessman in Sydney that's still how Wi-Fi works here what happened what happened you know we're doing another stuff around the world with the internet we have like a functioning situation out there how long would you like your file upload to take 30 days well we can do that we're Australia at least you have health care congratulations for yelling that out better to someone who can't get health care don't think that we're not saying that this is a superior country but your Wi-Fi is not great yeah we think that's fair we're just saying about Wi-Fi not

ha ha everybody's dying yeah we don't we know that we're gonna die in a nuclear fire but at least all of our shit will be downloaded a temporary airfield about a hundred and forty miles west of Alex Springs would be their camp okay the uwa president wanted insurance in case Lassiter died oh that's interesting so he convinced Lassiter to live a sealed envelope in a bank inside it was a note with coordinates of the reef written in invisible ink oh my god what yeah just get the old invisible ink out is that go ahead and write that down slip it in the envelope why do you know if you die they take out

the bank just invisible invisible ink degrades how does it over time in sorry just so I know the rules of Hogwarts how does the magical ink work it's made of invisible how does one get it to appear oh oh no no I don't know no I don't know there's no I don't think there's actually a solution to that one right no but I think I would imagine a visible ink is some sort of chemical and then you pour another chemical on it and you can see it sure I'd imagine to I'd imagine a reef where gold lives imagine all the bullshit don't start with me in the invisible ink so when they read that Alice Springs Fred brought out earnest

all church all church had a vast knowledge of the region okay Fred knew him and introduced all church to Lassiter who suddenly started babbling and discussing the last time he had passed through in the buildings he recognized he's just fucking he gets nervous and he gets chatty oh yeah I know that place too that's my favorite spot I love it there no I'm not talking about there me either no I know I know what you're talking about thought I'm saying there oh my god why do you keep bringing these assholes around know it all's Lassiter pointed out the general store and recalled buying supplies there 30 years

earlier all church said he was wrong the buildings were only 25 years old so at what point are people going like this guy's full of shit Lassiter said he picked up fresh supplies from the telegraph station and all church said he had been there for 40 years and never once had he issued stores to anyone Fred then pulled Lassiter away and sculpted him sculpted him for talking nonsense to all church he thought he was just bragging to all church and not that he was he thought he was lying you know he thinks that Lassiter is lying but he thinks he's just talking bullshit to try and seem like cool in front of

all church right and not the fact that he knows nothing huh yeah so that he's the man who has an access to invisible ink that's real the locals warned that the thornycroft truck would not make it a hundred miles in the desert and said they'd be better off with camels they figured the locals did not understand after all this wasn't a regular truck it was a state-of-the-art piece of British engineering this is just like when a civilian breaks into the bat mobile that's what I'm expecting to start happening here explain they're just gonna be like what the fuck is this like I said the catchphrase will be

jumping so the car the trucks too complicated is what you're saying yeah they don't know what they're doing they took the thorny croft well a lot of these guys do know what they're doing they're experts but not the people in at the helm who seem to be disagreeable type no the one guy is not last yeah everyone else is an expert okay like a literal expert that's still a problem though why it's fine because that's the guy in charge we're experiencing something similar in certain areas of the world well so the only guy so he's not in charge he's in charge of he's he's the guy who's gonna take him there

but he's not in charge of the expedition like another guy is officially in charge sure yeah okay right so so they think it will make it hundred miles they told me use camels then they took the thorny croft out for a few test drives and found it used a shitload of petrol to run so now they had to buy a second vehicle to carry fuel for the thorny croft so what's the point that is an interesting question that is a very interesting question well this thing can't make it oh well shit we can boy we're fucking idiots I don't know what to how we handle this so they hired a local guy Fred Coulson who owned a truck

to join the team and drive the gas behind the thorny croft but the whole advantage whatever no but the whole the whole the advantage is that they have something that's bad ass and now they're like and we'll have a truck following us right it's not a good plan right but it's a plan thank you Coot was mad another guy joined because it would split the gold seven ways Coot and Fred were always fighting Fred thought Coot was a clueless city dandy with a hothead quote he wore boots like girls wear to ride in its shows he did not possess the right temperament for such a trip what so he's saying that

he's got like fancy boots that you wear to just show off and not actual functioning boots okay so they look hot and kind of what's the fuck them that might be what was at the root take off those fancy lady boots come on you don't look professional you sexy so and so well you're parading around all the time I know what you're doing do a spin spin around go ahead let me see that shit Coot Coot thought Fred was Coot thought Fred was a weak ineffectual leader who was stuck in the past and didn't understand the value of modern technology Coot then secretly started sending telegrams to the company directors in

city criticizing Fred's leadership and accusing him of plotting to double cross the company so he's a bot a bot he's a bot he's just like some random Twitter problem he's just like somebody's somebody said this he's an under he's undermining him right I'm aware that's what my point was I guess I was confused what a bot meant okay he's saying like a Russian bot yeah yeah what do they do well he's just he's like anonymously sees an anonymous source oh anonymous arse well yeah okay gotcha feels like the irons cold they set out on July 24th 1930 as they crossed a dry riverbed near the post office Taylor lost

control of the thornycroft and it got stuck up to its axles in soft sand okay well at least they have the gas truck so they're not out of the town yet right and they've right they're just in front of the post office sure and the thorny croft is stuck sure but it's good to get these kinks out early oh and in front of the post office we're surely they're gonna be helpful yeah the entire town then came out to watch as the trims team struggled for an hour to push the truck free so at this is anybody on the team at this point like okay maybe this is not a good idea I don't think so I mean they must have been but there's no

indication of it okay you would think it's literally an hour into the journey not even an hour hour into the journey no like two minutes to the journey they didn't get out of the town it's not even the journey hasn't even started so they literally just started it's like they drove into the garage and fucking crash the car like it's just the first night Lassiter locked himself in the trucks cabin he slept on the bench seat clutching a gun and box of ammunition while everyone slept outside so did any is anybody worried no it seems normal seems like a guy who spent a lot of time in the bush yeah sure so that's just how

he likes to rest all right well I'm gonna go coddle a gun in the front cab of the truck have a good night gentlemen it's my white noise it really got it relaxes me I just the next day they stopped at the camp to hire a local Aboriginal guide but all the guides were out except Mickey except who Mickey Mickey was 45 and almost blind with the Tacoma get him on board we need a blind guy he was also totally unfamiliar with the land they were traveling well it doesn't matter anyway you can't see shit so they hired him yeah if anything is sentence or sentences are heightened we may as well call this one maps he's

probably got so no or he's Mickey the adorable blind tour guide who's never been there it doesn't matter so it was slow-going the thorny croft kept betting getting bogged down on the sand and caught in dense scrub its tires are being shredded by sharp mogul roots oh man those fucking mogul roots where aren't they I mean I can't tell you how many trucks I've lost out there surely Mickey is helpful in these times of oh yeah problem all right let me know where it is and I'll do what I can Mickey Mickey's just out there I don't know where I am I think we're close we haven't left the town idiot oh it's like blackout

right it's black I totally midnight with those no moon no it's like noon we need to move this way into Fred's chest yep right over here that's where we got to go guys trust Mickey oh my god I'm talking to a tree I am so sorry I had no where's the group is the group here is the group even here group well I need no we're standing right oh hey sorry I didn't mean to say they need me under my breath there you are hey all right I think it's there have we left the town you're pointing you're pointing at the town I'm old and tired all right Mickey needs a kippy I am just oh all this searching after a few days

Lassiter was recognizing landmarks okay that's a good sign that's a great sign one day pointed out a cave saying he remembered camping there oh yeah I used to camping that one unfortunately the cave was 600 feet up a sheer granite cliff possible it's totally possible later he patted the trunks of two bean trees claiming he hung his hammock between them over 30 years before oh yeah these are the bean trees I'll never forget these two trees they only live up to 20 years well they have their father's eyes I'm a hundred percent these are them when Fred pointed out the problems with

his story Lassiter flipped out and screamed at him quote you think you know everything that's a good sign right yeah yeah no he seems like a competent leader Fred asked Lassiter to tell him one landmark that was ahead of them and Lassiter refused to answer now and went and got in the thornycroft and salt no no I'm locking myself in too hope you're happy no more landmarks for you micky's the only one who knows what I'm talking about Mickey these are the same bean trees aren't they oh my god all right I'm gonna shut up Mickey shut your mouth five days of darkness though these are the one day the party set up

camp Fred decided it was a good time to use the portable wireless to transmit his first report to Sydney oh god now fortunately Lassiter had taken a three week wireless training course on how to use it before they left oh boy so he also packed up all the equipment uh-huh so when they unpacked it they learned Lassiter had forgotten to pack the microphone hmm well Dave is that important um yeah it does yeah it turns out if you don't have a microphone you can't talk to anybody right you can hear them right so that you see that might be a problem another red flag perhaps yep okay several maybe of some service

potentially Mickey help no Mickey it's just terrified running in circles also Lassiter had left out several glass valves from the wireless transmitter that were needed well I mean that does I mean at that point you're just nit picking I mean you forgot the microphone let the guy go already I need to go on and on about these bulbs and then when Lassiter started connecting wires to terminals the entire thing short-circuited oh boy boy yeah I got a good feeling yep Taylor and coot exploded at Lassiter Fred had to step in to split them up from fighting how far away are they from the original

destination at this point well nobody knows right but I mean like are they in the they have no idea where the fuck no no one knows except for Lassiter who knows nothing no he knows he's been there right but in the world where he doesn't know nobody else has any idea where the fuck they are at all he's the only guy except for Mickey who's a guide right Mickey who's the blind guide okay okay coot said he thought Lassiter was playing them was playing playing them okay Lassiter was starting to irritate the group by making strange well he got them all killed improbable boasts such one night he recited a Rudyard Kipling

poem then claimed that he had been responsible for making Kipling famous oh boy at that point you're just like wait did he just say he made Kipling famous we're gonna die we're going to die you know I'm the one who told them to get into that he was a drummer when I met him I said kip babe nah not your thing get a pen in your hand give that a world next thing you know about a boom bomb here he is anyway we're gonna be fine once I get this microphone situation worked on quote well he said he was a famous rock radio operator quote I specialized on Kipling over the radio and it went down very well wait even very

patient Charles lost his shit one night and started screaming at Lassiter quote go away you annoy me and he does just sound like the most annoying person like it's one thing if he's totally lied and fucked everything up but he's also the worst Charles stormed over to coot and said quote the man's a lot of tech he claims to have designed the harbor bridge but they knew this I don't think they knew that oh they didn't know so now they're like wait what yeah he said he designed that bridge oh god as the party neared the airstrip camp the second truck broke down well that'll be fine the the men fashioned a sort of

battering ram from a mulga tree and tied it to the front of the thorny croft and tried to bulldoze the scrub okay for a while it worked but the thorny croft took serious damage and was now almost undrivable so not good Mickey the aboriginal guide became uneasy well if Mickey's losing is cool at the situation you've got to be going crazy I don't know I think we're fucked Mickey what are just you can't see anything what do you mean we're fucked it smells really bad he said it smells bad I got a bad feeling oh my god I can't see it but I don't like it Mickey you're all rock

Lassiter continued sleeping every night locked in the trucks cab with the rifle and ammunition because of course he's the only one who was terrible from the get so he's like I'm sleeping like a goddamn baby their progress got even worse when the thorny croft's engine caught on fire okay so what what can they use to leave now well they could make I mean they put out I think it's still functioning but it's not great yeah after two weeks they reached the camp location friend that said Coot and Coulson to drive back a hundred miles to a plane at an airstrip Fred was planning their big push west but Lassiter

was still the only one who knew where they would be heading and he wouldn't tell anyone anything he just kept messing with the wireless the next day there the next day Fred discovered Lassiter was tapping the SOS signal into the wireless oh which was pointless because the wireless was dead but he's still that is a trail he did not need to leave Fred was furious he threatened to destroy the wireless with an axe unless Lassiter packed it up Coulson returned and told everyone that Coot whose amateur pilot license was lapsed clipped a tree taking off causing the plane to crash nose first into the

ground oh my god see this is this is the spider webbing this is the bad hiring could survive trees fall came out of nowhere could survive but had a serious thigh wound he had to be rushed back to Alice Springs to get medical attention Fred was it Fred the learner he learned the company's directors in Sydney were concerned this is Coot Coot found out the company's directors in Sydney were concerned word was out and they would be beaten to the reef by other prospectors no well that's not gonna be a problem good lord if only they knew right now you're gonna be fine no no worry Fred sent Coulson back with his

report and a request for camels well that's an interesting turnaround so now there's it says five so there's five remaining expedition numbers Fred Sutherland Mickey Taylor and Lassiter okay one night Lassiter invited Fred into the Thorny Crofts cop I'd like to see you in the captain's quarters please lock the door how are you hi Fred I feel like we should talk about some stuff quote by my calculations we are approaching my country so somebody owes me a thank you he said the reef was 100 miles ahead and he would be able to recognize landmarks soon what must be going on inside of his head right now like it's

all like the bridge is finally getting built and he needs to actually do it he's a hundred he's right there almost there so what is he what is going through the mind of a man Fred or Lassiter Lassiter like what is going through his head now that he's like close to his bullshit mine like he's got to be like this is gonna be tough when we get there to explain it I don't know why you're assuming it was here boy this is the bean tree all over again I tell you don't know why you're assuming this is bullshit I'm skeptical then Lassiter abruptly changed the topic opened his diary and began to read aloud an entry

he had written about Fred so he's just a huge asshole he's not just crazy he's also a huge asshole the entry was very harsh he then flipped the page and read another later entry about how he judged Fred too harshly what a weirdo Fred just sat there while Lassiter read entry after entry about all the members of the party what and saying that he was not being given enough to enough say the next day they kept moving through the desert well with more tension then Lassiter announced they would soon be entering a fine mineral bearing country and sure enough the landscape changed Sutherland began noticing quartz and

ironstone in abundance the party grew very optimistic for the first time since Sydney they started seriously discussing mining at a mountain summit Lassiter started scribbling complicated calculations and then he declared quote well I'm Dan if these figures are not the same bearings as those we left in the vault back in Sydney ah the invisible ink paper so it matches the thing that nobody can see perfect yes he told Fred they would have to go 150 miles south in order for him to get his bearings now everyone in the party knew there was no gold that far south there was just no everyone knows there's no

gold there Lassiter then admitted he had been misleading them oh my god but only ah damn it because he was suspicious of one member of the party oh my god he's reservoir dogging them that almost came out he asked Fred to trust him a little bit longer okay so he's he was just like he's like one of these guys is not he said this just to Fred yeah I believe so I would imagine but he he's basically saying I would have taken a straight there but one of you guys is a you know bit of a wild we've got a mole yeah we got a bad guy in the party I'm trying to shake the mole out I'm not an idiot or crazy I'm trying to find the

mole we all know there's nothing 150 miles that stupid all right and I'll be honest I think it's Mickey I don't know I haven't like the way that guy's looking at me the whole time I don't I don't trust him why did we bring him I mean that's what I keep coming back to why is he here we're in a cave right yeah Mickey we're in a cave Fred really didn't have a choice if he called off the expedition Lasseter would claim he had lied because he feared the others were plotting to double-cross the company and Fred would get the blame and Lasseter would look fine Fred agreed to give Lasseter a second chance okay as they

were going to sleep that night Lasseter yelled out and asked if Fred remembered the figures of the bearings he had taken on the mountain when he's scribbling in the uh-huh Fred told Lasseter he had written them in his own notebook Lasseter replied quote I can't find it that's a dark nuisance for it means I shall have to go out again tomorrow and take the reading again he'd lost his book or well no it's possible he wrote it with the invisible ink pen true they now had been traveling for a month oh boy oh god the thorny crop was seriously in bad shape they stopped back at the camp Fred decided to wait for Coulson to return

before moving out though injured Coot was still determined determined to be part of the expedition he started sending telegrams to Sydney suggesting that the plane could be repaired so he's in a different location with the right and but he's optimistic about the chances of all this yeah after he crashed the plane he got a message back saying a new plane was coming piloted by a man named Pat Hall okay then strangers arrived at the camp a young white man and two aboriginal guides with five camels the white man was a 22-year-old German who was working as a dingo scalper oh god that had to be an occupation at a time how many people

know what a dingo scalper is is that something people know okay so is that just someone who sells cheap tickets to the dingo show I'm hoping it's that okay so they were hated among Bushman as brutal mercenary killers who shot and poisoned dingoes for government bounties a British explorer described them as permanently smelling of death but what I mean they were they would just take the scalp yeah well I think to prove that they killed one okay get money from the government oh because right okay that's fun no why it just seems like a you don't think a dude walking around with a bunch of dog furs is not cool well just

the heads just the scalp I did it see you're welcome the nico scalper said they were almost out of rations and hope the expedition would share some of their food Fred agreed to share food if they would join up and let them use the camels okay quid pro quo sure you get a guy who smells like death you get some camels mm-hmm no what's not to love Colson was now days overdue with the supplies just as they started a search and rescue mission Cole Colson keep driving towards them he said the company had fired him wait hey guys oh thank god I don't work here anymore huh what hi what do you mean

yeah I'm not I'm not with you guys I'm actually going past you wait no why are you gonna pet we need you yeah I don't work for you I'm headed out got fired check it take Mickey oh no I got to go out on my own I'm independent contractor now and I'll see you guys around thanks for good to catch up to see you we're doing good to you know just see do you go off don't think that you're doing good or not yeah things here are pretty good yeah it looks good it is good yeah everyone here is doing good yeah yeah so whatever yeah like you go do you I'll do me don't need you coming over here acting like I need you I don't need you

okay cool go I'm gonna give a shit who needs you okay I heard yep fine we're good great let's wrap up this go okay I need you I'll pay you whatever do you want dingo heads I have the basically part of them I've been fired I'll give you kill Mickey we'll eat Mickey stay here I love you fucking eat make me don't leave me I don't know what the fuck up do you everything's cool everybody be cool Colson said there were no trucks or camels coming instead they were sending a plane Fred was furious and blame coot for crashing obviously sure Colson and Mickey then decided to just leave the group you know shit's bad when Mickey's

like I'm better than this Mickey that's a cliff I said like whatever I'm better than this so they sat and waited for the plane Lassiter was really driving everyone insane he started he started singing Mormon hymns incessantly all of them to one tune is it possible even his hymns are full of shit yeah it's very possible his hymns are all full of sure he's just like he's a hymn provisor yeah yeah yeah that's the best way to do it in my opinion and then when I did it then the new plane arrived with Coot and haul inside it was not an impressive plane and Coot was so injured he had to be lifted in and out of the cockpit hey

I'm a burden good news you're gonna have to take care of me now too I'm not doing well you fellas say you need a handicap guy well the wound is not good but I wanted to come here and support you guys again you guys to support me just go and drag me behind you I'm gonna need a lot of extra attention though I'm not the guy I was when I left I'm really sick now Coot was very upset Fred had hired the dingo scalper this guy's an asshole he didn't think the dingo scalper story held up there were no no no no no no I mean that would just be the yeah well I got to be honest I think something's

not adding up here you know what I mean what's that well I don't know it just seems like these stories don't make any sense when you reevaluate them thinking the same thing like I'm looking back on every single conversation go wait what I think this whole thing is founded on bullshit yeah that dingo scalper is full of it what are you talking about he's full of it yeah I don't know why Lassiter the brilliant mind that he is I heard pretend dingo scalper man well you were talking about the dingo scalper right nope yeah good to hear you said yes so now I did I say that but they hired this scalper right and and they're sharing

their food so everyone got that right wait what yeah yeah so the reason he didn't think the dingo scalper story added up is because there were no dingos around for many miles I mean truly an amazing gripe in this situation the next morning Lassiter went up in the plane with Hall to get the lay of the land sure well to refresh his memory just from a higher distance right right privately he told Koot that he'd seen the reef but didn't want to tell anyone because he didn't trust Fred oh so wait wasn't Fred the one he was saying before he didn't trust someone too wait what didn't he say before to someone that was

that oh free this is who he's okay I'm sorry I get you now so now he's finally opening up about who he thinks the mole is yeah it's the guy he told he thought there was a mole that's what I mean so wait that is what he did he was talking to Fred before and he's like I think someone's full of shit Fred was like okay whatever now he's like away and he's like boy that Fred's the mole I was talking to Fred about yeah this dude is playing on multiple levels yeah it's like fucking three-level chest shit this is how you know he's full of it no we don't know he's full of it he has to be he wouldn't have a conversation with Fred

about thinking someone's a problem unless what if it's real what if he doesn't trust Fred for a reason but then why would he tell Fred that there's a problem get inside of his fucking brain no you're not inside of his brain he told the group that they needed to travel 150 miles south which was weird because the plane had only flown 80 miles south and there's no way he could have seen 150 miles away so they started south and they kept having to stop to repair the thornycroft 150 miles south they reached and climbed to the top of a sand dune okay beyond it the train was completely broken and went down several

feet they would never get the thornycroft through and there was no sign of a reef Fred told Lasseter to confess to being a fraud oh my god Lasseter admitted he had never seen this country before but his instinct was that the close that the reef was close to Peterman ranges which was 500 miles away Jesus and Fred was like go fuck yourself and called an end to the expedition because it would go on forever yeah it's you know it's actually 200 miles that way now it's a hundred miles back oh damn it I'm all mixed up I feel like Mickey Fred told Lasseter the best thing he could do would be to disappear because he'd been

he'd be facing a fraud charge Fred said he would hire Johns the Dingo scalper to continue to search with Lasseter while everyone else went back to Sydney okay if Lasseter wanted to use that opportunity to just you know take off and start a new life that would be totally up to him wow on the way back the team met a group of Aboriginal men led by Stockman named Billy Buttons when they spoke to him it was very obvious that Buttons did not want to meet Johns who's the Dingo scalper okay now Fred had drawn up an agreement with Johns the company would pay Johns five pounds a week for two months to continue the

search for the reef with his Aboriginal guides and camels following Lasseter's guidance but the Aboriginal guides took off because they could do math and they were like two white guys two camels with supplies on them that would be two Aboriginal guys walking and we are fucking out of here now thanks guys good luck though it sounds like you guys are really close to something awesome here before the two groups went their separate ways Fred gave Lasseter his compass watch and revolver get lost and shoot yourself okay so it's just sending him off like here you go take these three things and Fred watch

Lasseter and Johns until they're out of sight and then turned around and said quote that's the end of my millions just then was he being sarcastic I think so yeah just then Coulson arrived with fresh mail from Sydney it turns out Lasseter had not sent a letter to his wife like everyone believed he had turns out he sent word to Sydney that he had found the reef oh my god Coulson was amazed that nobody else in the team knew oh my god great news huh it was it let's have a look at it I hear it's amazing everything he says in the letter is unbelievable I can't wait to see the mermaids I know he drew pictures I'm

pretty pumped up well you guys look at me funny what's going on she doesn't find where's Lasseter it's all the money where's the blowjob tree oh please God tell me there's I am the blowjob tree there is a blowjob tree oh thank god there's a blowjob tree because I come over here and suck my dick wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait once you speak the name of the blowjob tree you have to make the tree come Jesus Christ the blowjob trees loud he didn't say which one just assumed it was a tree that sucked my but I have to blowjob the tree things are different out here get your lips on the blowjob tree human least

he's not crazy so so everyone in Alice Springs thinks he's found the gold Fred then suspected that the company in Sydney was actually manipulating the share prices oh shit everything moved so he thinks it's not that Lasseter sent a letter he thinks that they they they wrote an invisible ink right so they made it back to Alice Springs on August 28th after two months in the outback oh my god Fred's report of Lasseter's fraud reached the company so they fired Fred so boy this is a story we all know and they put Coot in charge and thank God I've been waiting for a break besides my thigh

I don't know if I want to be charged that's the kind of feeling weird since that tree made me do things well what did the tree make you do you mean crash your plane couldn't feel like a man I used to feel like oh you found the blowjob tree did you yeah my mouth been degraded oh you didn't know you had to blow it and it was thorny did you well that's the kind of gusto we're looking for here if I could be honest I like it not miss it we get that a lot Coot it's a good tree well look all I can tell you is the trees not looking to settle down okay so whatever feelings you have I would move on to the tree it's nothing

more than another idiot sucking his dick okay okay anyway we've got a job for you we're gonna be great at it so Coot made plans to catch up with Lassiter Coot would fly out and Taylor would go by camel is flying Coot's flying that's not good and Taylor is gonna go by Camel and then they'd meet up at a camp at well I don't want to say that sure that's the spirit let's just say there's three U's and then L and an R we don't need to fucking sound it out oh they're whatever totally what you wanted to avoid Taylor took off first because obviously Camel take longer than a plane or in this world Dave Coot went to

Hermannsburg mission to hire aboriginal guides and he stayed overnight and he went back to Alice Springs the next day he discovered the locals had sent out search parties for him assuming that he crashed his plane right well so that they announced those as soon as he takes off all right he's up and search party go let's go let's find him guys he's out there somewhere guys we're 100% guys look for him now you see what he's flying and go find that it'll be out there somewhere after two weeks Coot took off for a luru or whatever as Coot landed his propeller caught a branch and shattered damn thing now he was stranded

in the camel party was nowhere to be seen eight days later his water ran out boy he made for a water hole that he'd seen earlier but by the time he got there it had dried up so he started scooping mud into his mouth turns out this does not work that night as he was laying there he saw cooking fires and he hid not wanting to be killed by aboriginal people okay and the morning he realized the campfire was from his camel party oh that's a tough thing how's you guys I was down there eating mud sleeping I wasn't eating mud I didn't suck that tree either no none of that shit sorry you saying you ate mud and didn't suck a

tree yeah hi hey that's a good way to start a conversation what you said's crazy it's just how we greet each other out here what I ate mud all night and didn't truck a suck of trees dick that's that's how we do it okay morning out here well we're here too hungry or you fill up I use some water do you have any juice or water or anything that's not mud yeah no we got water because out here we drink a lot of mud all night just eating mud this is the safe decision good call so the camel party had not got had a great time either they had to wait two weeks because of thunderstorms then they got lost well

then camel party isn't the right name for their expedition it took a month instead of two weeks okay so Taylor fixed the plane propeller and coot flew back to Alice who shouldn't be flying any longer because the pilot man there's trees he should not be flying he's also in charge that's great good flew the coop so he flies back to Alice brings for supplies when he took off what tell me he's not hitting trees on the way up at least before it was on the down no but the plane caused a dust devil which swept through the camp spreading embers from the campfire which burned the entire campsite quite an exit though huh and

this left the band with nothing but the clothes they were wearing oh my god oh my god coot landed in Alice Springs to find everybody in a panic search parties have been sent out to look for him why just left them they were fine because they thought he crashed but now he's calling off search parties for men who actually need search they do need a search party and then coot and he playing the camel party for being late not his crashing of the plane also I didn't eat mud so no I did taste that tree though coop look look it's last at her in a tree suit okay we didn't want to tell you and I mean taste you understand what

I'm saying yes we've very clear super like the way only a man okay really taste stop and when they do it and when they know stop it's like a porno no you are just stopping all over my face no which has a moist all right coop on your skin no good it's not it's just nice the company directors then fired coot I'm what grounds Lord give the man a shot when Taylor and the camel party arrived Taylor learned he was the new leader of the expedition now Fred went back to

Sydney and told the directors Lassiter was a con man who no one would ever see again and the directors very quiet and one said quote well we have heard Fred's report that's what we came here for meeting adjourned and the meeting was over and Fred walked out to the lift and as he stood there waiting for it two board members approached him and one put a fist up to Fred's face and said quote you and Coulson won't ever get that reef we all know about you two you think now you have got everybody on out on the road and Lassiter discredited you two will go out and find the reef but we're sticking with Lassiter and we

hope when you two try and double cross up that you'll perish at first so you're just like yeah you got me good luck guys good luck with everything truly two months later John's arrived back in Alice Springs alone he had a strange story oh boy John said that he and Lassiter had traveled into the mountains and set up camp uh-huh and Lassiter insisted on going out alone and came back after a few days with bags of gold rocks sure sure claiming he'd found his reef and when John's asked to see the gold well you can't see it with human eyes it's invisible gold Lassiter yelled that it was quote none of his business

okay who wants to travel with this guy anymore why are you near him let me say it they didn't see it why do you keep asking to see it if you keep asking to see it never gonna see it which by the way you're never gonna see sick of him see the gold I found it okay it's real oh why does everyone ask for results why can't they just believe the process they argued and Lassiter threw his steel dinner plate at John's and challenged him to a fistfight come on you John's then pulled those revolver well let's not do this Lassiter lunged at him and they fought for control the gun Lassiter got it away from John's and after a

standoff they agreed to let bygones be bygones okay I think in however many times we've done this and we've heard a scenario like this there's never been a time where two men have been like all right sorry about that I really apologize we just what were we thinking listen I'm gonna kill you John's returned the their their agreement was John's were returned to Alice Springs for fresh supplies alone and Lassiter gave him letters to give to the government resident in town okay so after they split up John opened and read the letters there were two letters it turns out mm-hmm and the first Lassiter

said he had found the reef and staked out a claim and that he wanted John's to return with fresh camels in supplies okay and supplies in the second letter which was for the chief of police he demanded John's be put under arrest and jailed oh my god John spent a fortnight at Hermannsburg mission before wandering into Alice Springs word quickly spread that Paul John's had murdered Harold Lassiter now it didn't help that the pastor at Hermannsburg mission reported that in the winter of 1930 Paul John's had come urgently looking to buy camels this is way before mm-hmm when asked why he needed them he said that a gold

exploration company had formed in Sydney and they were sending out an expedition in a big truck and he knew the truck wouldn't last long and they would need camels quote so I'm going out there to meet the expedition so that when they are stuck they will hire me and that's exactly what had happened holy shit and now the company had a new problem they had Lassiter's coordinates for the reef locked away in a bank vault but they couldn't get to them until Lassiter was pronounced dead it so they needed a body mmm that's never a good statement on this podcast they sent a plane to search for the last place

Lassiter was seen who they're gonna use the pilot but it doesn't matter but the plane went missing okay well then I think we know who after weeks the pilots were found starving and dehydrated having all we have is mud sweet watery mud for some reason we're still craving water it's the mud makes you crave it somehow they had missed the location completely and kept flying and run out of fuel well bog buck bob a buck an Australian Bushman was put in charge of the search for Lassiter's body after months he claimed he found Lassiter dead in a shallow grave he brought back dentures

and some letters he had found on the body later he went back later he went back and found what seemed to be Lassiter's diary he repeated Lassiter's claims that he had found his reef but this diary didn't match the diary everyone on the expedition had seen Lassiter writing in or reading from or anything yeah people suspect that it was a forgery by the AW president to confirm Lassiter's death and give the company access to the bank vault when Bob Buck was asked to give a sworn statement he was genuinely frightened to put his hand on the Bible the whole thing you got to be ready for that lie

you know it's coming you gonna be like boom can't be like air wait or is God really okay yeah no final answer yes final on the stand he said quote I could not swear whether the skeleton was a white or black man it is hard to tell you look at his what does he think he can't lie what does he think I think is the full question he somehow he managed though to satisfy the bank that Lassiter was dead and the AW president got his hands on the envelope in the vault here we go time for the big reveal what does the invisible ink say find out on a season finale of Lassiter it was a set of completely meaningless numbers was it

not an invisible ink I really think you pour something on it to make it just I think it's just a chemical reaction of some sort I'm still obsessed okay so it's a series of numbers that's not very helpful Fred was convinced Lassiter made it out of the desert he believed Lassiter had crossed into Western Australia and from there escaped to America you can't you shouldn't know first of all just to put this in modern context no one should be escaping to America in 1955 he said that Mormons in Australia told him Lassiter was a pastor in Salt Lake City there were many other Lassiter sightings over the years

in 1957 an American broadcaster traveled to Alice Springs with a TV crew to search for Lassiter's body the team located what they believed to be Lassiter's graved and unearthed a skeleton when the program is it a white man skeleton when the program's producer and production manager delivered the remains to the police station in Alice Springs they were arrested for desecration of a grave turns out Lassiter worked dentures in this skull had all of its teeth so they just dug up a fucking grave well yeah you really you genuine I mean you have to be pretty sure I think that's the rule we have with digging up bodies from

graves you can't just be like sort of like was this the one you saw is this it what about this one we got a bunch of the truck what are you guys freaking out about well let's get to the bottom of this oh man there was a fresh one so that wasn't him but that we brought that one along too and then we blew a tree that's gonna be a different story we got a little lost and we blew a tire near a tree and then we did blow a tree then we blew a tree rock hard yeah for a tree for a tree rock hard because it's made of wood so I'm saying there were still there are still people who believe that Lassiter's reef is out there since the

1930s dozens of expeditions dozens of expeditions have tried and failed to retrace Lassiter's footsteps in 2011 well-known Australian entrepreneur Dick Smith I can only imagine I didn't look him up but just his name is enough why he sounds like a fucking idiot he conducted his own search using a map he'd bought for $1500 on eBay from account Mickey the founder of the the founder of the Darwin beer can regatta what the fuck is that solid head shakes people are affirmatively shaking their heads like yeah and what of it deal with it do not mock it claim that in 2007 he

knew the location and was preparing to start mining operations there but the most persistent researcher sorry persistent searcher has been Bob Lassiter who was only five years old when his father left for Central Australia now in his mid 90s Bob has taken part in more than 30 expeditions to the desert since 1966 is convinced that his father's reef is out there somewhere so he means love so it turns out it has this saddest ending of all he just literally there should just be a chapter in all basic psychology books about what it's like to lose your father laceritis yeah where your dad leaves and then you're

searching for his love or what he was searching for just fucking amazing 90 years old it is terrible me mays will search for the blow job did we did we find the reef yet that my dad looked for but it was the only but if it's not there then he's a liar and no no because then my life will no no no no no no no say it no no there's a reef there there's a reef there it's of gold it's of gold say close the door leave me alone I need ever reef out I guess how is the question I still don't know how people because people go crazy for gold yeah they do go crazy for gold but even then so unsubstantiated just a rock we've

decided should be worth something I mean it really isn't fucking shit except for like that should be worth money it's just really a rock it's a shiny rock that's it we've just decided it's the stupidest thing ever well we can keep pulling this thread all night man I mean the fucking government the money the Illuminati it's like all over the shit dude all over the shit did fucking this shit goes all the way to the top bro like if you think we're not all technically looking for last year's gold then you're fucking living under an umbrella on the beach just like fuck let me just surf when the rest of us are

out there like shit dude we got to get our shit together no I'm fucking which kind of world do you want to live in dude you want to take the red pillar the blue dude Morpheus has a fucking hand open me I don't forget what the color exactly means but I take the one that says wake the fuck up wake up in the goo right learn karate through a fucking microchip in your brain you're the one who's like dude I don't know about these dudes and leather jackets and shit fuck those twins no way just fucking saying dude it's like tell that story today it's still same shit

did Dave's jet lag from me I guess that's our takeaway we want to thank you guys so much for coming out truly we appreciate the fuck out of it yeah if you're somebody who wanted to meet and greet with us stay inside here after the show it's the VIP people the other via yeah yeah right the meet and greet VIP people yeah I just said if you're someone who wants to not what I said no we get in trouble everybody stay here we'll be back in five minutes to hang out no yeah if you're one of the meet greet VIP people stick around everybody else get the fuck out but truly thank you much we really appreciate it guys we love

you thank you thank you