The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 549 - Baron Friedrich von Steuben

Episode Date: September 6, 2022

Comedians Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds examine Baron Friedrich von Steuben Sources Tour Dates Redbubble Merch     Squarespace Factor

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Oh I remember you're listening to the dollop on the all things comedy network this is an American history podcast. Each week I PhD historian from 17 different universities. Dave Anthony reads a story from American history to a guy who I I don't know who he is. I don't know what. Great. Gareth Reynolds. Gareth Reynolds who has no idea what the topic is going to be about. Good. I don't know what he he's now a guy with a plant behind him. He is doing he's doing looks like plant he's doing plant work he's doing a little bit of set decoration to make it come alive but the plant small so he looks oddly just slightly taller than

the plant so it well I have a I have a new backdrop coming and I don't know but it's we're waiting to find out if you're going to accept the terms of this looks more distracting well it looks like you have half of you it looks like you have half a plant wing and then half a broken plant wing that's what I'm looking at it's funny you talk about that because right now I have a fly in my kitchen is missing a wing and I'm letting him live out his days in a piece of Tupperware with some areas so you put him in place so you put a guy with freedom freedom to roam freedom to roam issues freedom in prison he can go

wherever he wants he can go there's no lid on the Tupperware I didn't say it was littered Tupperware why shut him in why is he in the Tupperware because he wants to go to his cucumber zone or the syrup corner or maybe he wants to play in the bark part have you considered that you've lived alone too long that's definitely crossed my mind and it seems to be the kind of consensus yeah this is this is when we that it's not okay yeah well intervene yeah here's the crazy I mean how many cries how many cries for help cries for help do I need to put out I don't see where it goes so so then enjoy the show Rick enjoy the

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Fred rick Fred rick it's hard the German way is the silent the silenade the CH is like a silenade Fred rish Fred rish yeah freed freed rish is what they say freed rish Wilhelm Ludolf Gerhard Augustin von Steuben was born in Russia I got it and I'm gonna have to say the full name every time I bring him up oh my god no he's like John Jacob jiggle hybrid exactly what he is he was born in Prussia which for those of you don't know is now a place called Germany his dad was an army captain so Friedrich was expected to join the military that was just it like you're you're from a military family you're in no choice

military best in Europe hands down they they could beat armies twice their size the king was obsessed with the army Friedrich joined at 16 by 22 he's a lieutenant officers lives are super strict they have to drill their soldiers every single day even the king would lead drills like it's serious business if you can imagine the Germans being into sort of a regimented serious yeah they've always kind of seemed like they played it does there I would describe them as lazy fare but in this in the old days they were super rigid so Friedrich was popular and he would get dirty with his men if needed sure one example is in the

summer he helped them he got down and helped them dig a ditch that was near a cemetery okay what are the reason he remembered this forever is because the stench from the bodies that kept spilling into the ditch as they were digging it in the heat cuz yeah apparently they just I would have guess they just buried people in a hole they dig it if they're it's like they're doing their trench there's some it needs to be done or they're just like hey come on for shits and gigs no I think there's a reason for it I doubt they were just like let's get a ditch near a cemetery I think they're probably putting

a canal in or something or sure they cut well great I'm who's not gonna want to drink that water yeah that's gonna be really great to yeah get well once you get the bodies out then it's fine as far as I know some of those nice not a health inspector cup your hands make a little corpse cup just love the corpse cup so frutica like I said very popular this man he studied French because that was the language of the Prussian court and you need you needed to know French to rise high up in the military because of that okay so he knows German and French so was so okay so I don't get it either

wasn't German none of us get it but I assume it has to do with the the way all the the monarchies were all inbred and and family related people so it was probably a French why did they do that they did that because they were just like you can't they didn't want to they didn't want to bang outside you don't want common you know I did bang outside but they you don't want common sperm common what we call common yeah well done thank you so he's promoted to the king's staff at 30 and Friedrich was known to notice very young handsome officers okay he's in the young handsome gentleman he was then chosen to go to a very elite

military school that was basically how to turn people into generals so he's he's tippity top yeah he's killing it yeah yeah and he had a problem there at the school though he somehow and we don't know how he made an enemy of another student and that student was a friend of the king and a guy who loved to ruin careers what a great right so after graduating Friedrich is demoted and sent to some shit command off in the middle of nowhere and then so wait he graduates and then they're like well done you finally got through the whole course now you're less than when you came here yeah cool fuck yourself okay

congratulations that's fine and then he's dismissed he's congratulations and then he's dismissed out of the military then he's then they just cut him loose oh shit so that's and he's like 32 or something like that which is most of your life yep and you've put it all towards the military and then you're like now you got to figure out what you want to do here at a 7-eleven yeah yeah so his entire life been out the military his biographer wrote quote without the Prussian army at 33 a student's life appeared to be over that is really amazing yeah it's like Belushi it is exactly like Belushi James so his life

is over yeah yeah James blue his life is over basically I mean everything he worked for is gone just because this guy's like yeah I don't fuck off yeah you're done you're done goodbye so he leaves the he leaves Prussia he's like I can't there's nothing for me here and he ends up in a place called hausen Sollen Heikingen which is a tiny German state okay so sorry is Germany Germany is a place yeah but there's a little the pressure is just not a part of it no Germany is Prussia so I think this is just a little independent sort of joint in there somewhere had some more speckles yeah I think let's go to speckle

let's call it a speckle we and then we're the splatters welcome to the splatter hello so the prince there hires him to be his chamberlain which is he's planning parties he's handling the kids education he's doing secretarial work and he and he's there for ten years he's friends with the prince it's all good he gets the title of the fryer her which he translates a baron he calls himself a baron is it fryer or fryer her it's F R I E H E R R fryer okay fryer her fryer her right or fryer her whatever yeah but he he still just wants to be in the military he still that's what he wants and then so he

puts the kids to bed yeah he like he's taking the balloons down from the party and the prince is like greatest work I'll see you tomorrow I think we might want cross sandwiches in the morning and he's like okay sounds good Prince and then the door shuts and then he looks out the window and he's like there's still more out there for me I want to kill there's somewhere else I want to be I want to be in the military and the prince like what was going on in here and he's like nothing just masturbating party's planning a party for you and then he leaves again I just feel my colleagues being ignored so he he bumps into an

Englishman in yeah watch it watch we are going oh boy I have the wrong date down here it says 1977 we know that's not true well maybe not I mean they could you know it could just be like it's gotta be early 77 so he bumps into an Englishman and they an Englishman tells him about what's going on in the American colonies which is war right War of Independence so nice this guy it turns out works for Benjamin Franklin who is in Europe finding military officers our greatest president BF and Friedrich he he wants in he's like that sounds great so he goes into debt buying a very resplendent outfit big fancy outfit so he's like a

bird trying to mate by the way this would be like this would be like having a music career it ending in scandal and then hearing American idols come that's right okay it's a hundred percent our youth because we have a lot of kids won't get it until they do it that way and so he goes to Paris to meet Franklin what he doesn't know is that every dude like him in Europe is also gunning for the jobs military jobs very American Idol very much so so back in America all the colony men are absolutely tired of Franklin sending over sort of mediocre military talent who are getting promoted over them so Congress had just told

Franklin stop no more don't send anybody else and then in comes Friedrich hello hey all right I'm excited to wear together we just said we don't want any more of you it's pretty weird to be totally honest peacocks yeah it looks you honestly look like you are a peacock that grew a human head let's yeah military look look look look they're going to see you yeah the whole idea here is yeah well we should try to be a little more discreet let's go kill it's not funny now we what we want to but they're gonna see you coming from a mile away or a kilometer to be afraid they I don't know if they will be they're

gonna just think you're a bird they'll probably just kill you for breast meat these are peacocks on my shoulder yeah I know yeah we understand what they are yeah it's an insane outfit it's crazy this is a banana how that yeah no the big banana head is just nuts it's just honestly it's not okay yeah just stop saying yeah when I'm telling you things that aren't you doing it while I'm talking about this I'm saying let's go we're not talking about let's go we're talking about the price there's a major problem with your ensemble where where this I mean we're just we're but this is like a vest the shirt and satin this is

how you should be yeah no it's a problem it's a major problem yeah no for them it's an advantage no oh you've never been in a war can you are you a look look look yeah no it's we're what you need to take the we're saying you have to take the outfit off it's what to put it in in for safekeeping for the voyage yeah do how to bury to America you're in America no I'm in Paris what why are you talking to me then I'm in America Paris looking for what am I doing here looking for generals and well you came to Paris to find men to recruit I drink a lot God and you think you're the president oh I'm Benjamin

Franklin oh okay okay all right I get it all right here we go all right from the top three two my hair is weird so a chances Francie he gets there right after Congress has said don't don't send anybody else and obviously the meeting doesn't go well Franklin doesn't care and it it's it's a disaster so much so that Frederick hates how he's being talked to and he storms out I like that too because they're like we don't watch you and he's like I don't like the way you're talking to me good day and they're like yeah no go he's like yeah I think I send a message to you a good day so he gets a job in Baton which is another

little weird state place Germans of Baton probably but rumors yeah rumors swirl that he's lost his job his previous job the one he had for ten years for diddling boys which is true oh for diddling oh so he was a molester no basically he just left his job and they made up rumors basically okay so he's in it he's in a weird place because his friends don't want to be associated with them and he's told if he wants to keep this commission he has to prove that he hasn't diddled boys that's very that's very hard because you have to bring all the boys forth and go okay say it like it's not I wasn't diddled by him huh so

he knows he's done in Europe he's like well I'm just absolutely fucked here so he goes back to Franklin and talks to him and and Franklin offers to he will pay his way but Franklin will send him with an endorsement but no job right he's gonna get a letter of endorsement basically so they so Franklin and this other guy who works with makeup fake papers saying that Friedrich is a lieutenant general okay and he's already a baron so he's got these two huge tights why why why are they doing that because they just got a good they did recognize I mean Prussian officers are the shit right and they did

recognize that he had like quality you know skills okay so Friedrich puts together we love taking Germans for war don't yeah we really do we did that after World War two with all the Nazi nevermind yeah Friedrich put together a staff of four people and he brings his dog Azor who is a huge dog who likes to jump in the windows of carriages and sit on Frederick's lap mm-hmm a real Larry real Larry so they set off on September 5th 19 1777 on a ship on the way on the journey there are three fires on the ship which is bad because the ship is loaded with explosives well it's you don't need it that's it's would be bad

either way yeah it's super bad doesn't blow up somehow and they arrive they arrive in Portsmouth then they go to Boston they're John hand what's that you're well that journey is what three weeks yeah I think it's about three weeks at that point John Hancock hosts a dinner party in his honor no one he hates Boston it's no one offers him a place to stay he has no money he gives it goes into it's past doesn't even more debt dude you see this guy's dressed like a fucking peacock yeah hi I am so peacock I'm not having this does not it's there's not staying you are yeah I know it'd be like having like a fucking

menagerie yeah what no Machi Mach Machi Mach Mach Mach Mach Mach yeah we know Mach yeah yeah what yeah yeah what yeah the look dude look honestly I know they said you could potentially stay at my house you can't even if you know Mach okay it's good to meet you though it's awesome the way that you look like a human fused with a like a bird that's how house was paid jump around yeah no you're not you're not you don't try to relate something I guess is what I'm saying huh yeah so I'm good to meet you yeah this will be goodbye forever Ben Affleck you can stay with me okay so like I said he has no

money he's renting now and going into more debt he called his landlady a devil because she charged him to feed a zore wow I like that I like that Ben Franklin liked him enough to be like okay I'll sign papers to get you over there but you're going to need to survive on your own without having any context yeah it's like you think you'd be like hey stay at Charles's place I think maybe they assumed that with the letter I think they assume that with the letter of introduction all the shit that he would get taken care of but they also oh you're a lieutenant but Americans if you're if you're rolling over and your lieutenant

general and a baron they're like oh he has money like they're not gonna think he's broke right right that's why the landlord's like I'm not giving him dog money yeah so after this he heads for Pennsylvania where Congress is and they it's a winner it's a rough journey and winner they stopped at an inn run by a loyalist at one point and the guy said they there were no beds and no food so he pointed a giant horse pistol at his face and screamed until the innkeeper said he had free beds and food after all I said beds I do have a few beds and a bunch of food which I need to get rid of so that's great that you're here so you

should probably have a bunch of that food oh it's a big horse gun here you go why don't you thank you why don't you take my bed take my bed have my bed take my bed here there you go take my bed this is a bunch of this is it take my bed take my bread in here some butter for it and you can have all that I'm trying to think what else you would want my peacock beautiful I love to meet you mr. peacock you are fantastic so yeah so great enjoy the bed the bread tell mr. peacock I said night night and it's sorry about earlier by the way I don't know what was up my ass I don't remember I said I don't have beds actually what I

meant to say was I got a bunch of beds good to meet you good to meet you you know what's great is he was screaming at him in German the guy had no idea what he was saying I can't understand you what's a what horse pistol yeah horse pistol big big big giant horse pistols I was described I assume that's a bigger pistol to shoot the horse fucking hey boy I wish I can't tell if I wish we were back there yeah because now we're like our guns would kill anything now it's so they go to York can't shoot a horse with a mangun no it just bounce off they had to York where Horatio Gates is he's the the board of war president and

Horatio puts him up because he sent oh he's he had already written a letter to ratio saying hey how awesome his victory was at Saratoga so he's buttered him up a little bit okay and he won a battle at Saratoga Horatio Gates did oh got you oh so he oh right right so he wrote a letter like gosh Saratoga was like my favorite yeah he's like it was like it was like European the way he did that yeah it was really good he told floor congressman he would work without pay and only take pay if America won the war we like and he said he shouldn't get a commission over deserving Americans and Congress like this is great what a great deal this guy's this guy doesn't know how

to make an idiot yes an idiot negotiate but of course they insist he take a captaincy and that they pay for his staff so he kind of knew how this is gonna work out he knew that they would not right if he seemed really sort of humble like he didn't need that stuff right this is how much well into the cause yeah right so now he has to impress general Washington at Valley Forge by the time he gets there he is kind of a celebrity the troops at Valley Forge are starving it's a brutal winner they have no supplies no food no clothes a lot of men are half naked and Frederick rolls in in his new clothes on his new

horse with a sleigh take some feathers here cover yourself in some of these feathers what are you doing you're gonna freeze he has a sleigh with dozens of jingle bells and his giant well-fed dog oh it's peacock a clause imagine you're starving and a dog comes in a camp you're like yeah you don't think it's real at a stake yeah no no no that's my dog don't worry about that no who's been naughty who's been nice I've been naughty hi yeah well that's not the right thing oh my god I've been so naughty do I get the dog no no no the dog's not going to be I know teach him how to play fetch take him over in the

woods teach him how to play I feel like you're going to play steak with him why don't you come to is your name steak ah no okay so just first vibes I'm picking up on a lot of you guys are really hungry and looking to eat me and my dog you look like a like a drumstick yeah well that's just cuz I'm dressed like a big bird by those parrots yeah well peacocks and then yeah the boots of parrot oh yeah yeah the whole thing is just kind of a bit of a you know bird vibe just bunch I got pigeon pigeon underpants mm-hmm so you can see I got hawk hawk legs you're gonna fit in right here right right and it's upper body

peacock then I've obviously got the owl helmet we don't have clothes so it's we got yeah I was gonna say different vibe I love this sort of stripped down look yeah that's great probably gonna wear your dog I've been well that's he's gonna need that obviously so we're just keep or yours so number four yeah so yeah you guys look I could you did everyone here's nipping real hot your nips are all super out like glass cutting yeah well we shouldn't be topless in the winter you know they mean no no you did your dicks look small too you got small dicks hot nips not but I'm saying it must be cold your dicks are small yeah it's

fucking cold we got you got turd-o-head dicks and turkey done nips let's everybody let's eat the dog in the man so Washington's a little leery of Friedrich because and of solid food there's just been a plot to overthrow him and replace him with ratio gates and oh and he's coming from gates gates and he's friendly with gates he's dressed like a zoo he's really friendly with gates he heard that Friedrich charmed gates wife who was an absolutely hated woman who was described by a gates friend as a quote Medusa who governs with a rod of scorpions I mean when you're putting like extra there's a lot extra things on

the Medusa comparison she's not a nice Medusa though she's one you should watch out for she's more like a scorpion Medusa she's a scorpion Medusa so free he's given a very nice little cabin he found two handsome 22 year olds who absolutely adored him and he adored them Alexander Hamilton and John Lawrence oh wow they spoke French so that was nice some believe and what's your name my name is why do you do that no no don't that be none of that Alexander Hamilton when you just say it I'm excited to stay in your cabin I'm Alexander Hamilton we can end this why would why would I draw your eye or when I just want to sit by the fire

so some believe free had more than a professional interest in these two guys and there were rumors the two of them were hooking up but who knows right but that the two that those two guys have a little something going on with them too so whatever okay so Washington trust these guys and Lawrence tells his congressman father they should make Freerich the inspector general of the army and he is like yeah it's a good idea but there's already an inspector general a guy named Thomas Conway who had been one of the guys who just tried to overthrow Washington so Washington should probably be down is but Congress

was like no you guys got to figure it out and he worked together I know it's a little awkward work together be buddy it's like that Congress come on done that we're one birth yeah Congress and say no just get along no he tried to overthrow me I know well fortunately we were on recess so we can't take that up anyway so maybe you guys could just work out your problems so we understood he tried to overthrow you now what could you do to help this situation not nothing what not nothing no that's right I he tried to overthrow me yes and he we understand that now what can you do to help make it better I can't do anything

I what the fuck you talking about he did something to me I didn't do anything we just we just went into recess we're on vacation now then why the we're back in September what yeah next year so fucks to anyway good luck we're gonna go to Martha's Vineyard get fire him we can't we're on recess we really like to come back and say you're sorry and see what that we're at war and the guy under the number one general tried to overthrow him you should do something you should do something that's you know are you doing the third person thing it's a sign of an egomaniac just so you know a lot of psychiatrists will tell you that anyway

I'm taking the family up to Cape Cod now we're gonna go to the Hamptons after we weren't so hard there's places don't exist yet that's why it's exciting you have a great time so Congress right expressing work it up but but so Washington Thomas Conway has already left Valley Forge after he tried to overthrow Washington and so Washington makes Freerick the unofficial secret inspector general nice nice so it's all very shadow government kind of yeah it's always been shady I mean but I understand why you do that but it's like you're the president you know what I mean president is general just a general

right okay different like it's hard for me to picture anything other than that present he doesn't become president or whatever so or is he president now I don't think he's president yet look who's in the driver's seat look who's in the driver's seat wow this moment of did Gareth accidentally say that properly is brought to you by Squarespace Squarespace sometimes the guy who does all the research thinks he's right and then the dumb one just says something as a joke and he might actually have gotten it correct you're off by ten years you're off yeah he wasn't president until after everything was over

and they did the Constitution and everything was done yeah yeah yeah right so not at all not the president yeah like I have been suggesting Ben Franklin when you just did like a premature victory dance sort of thing a premature a celebration that's what happens to all guys yeah get excited about the victory so it's a very inspector general's incredibly important position make sure soldiers are trained and drill do you maintain discipline get them close and food and oversee commanders so it's a whole thing and you're the coach Frederick also really really wanted to be liked so he threw big parties big

fancy parties he by the way that training as a party planner coming real handy they're like this table arrangement is unbelievable he's like oh just something I screw to get a yeah men only right the officers junior officers some parties were for only for those who were half naked at least half naked so he had sure if you came with half to full you came with the britches on you're not let in a lot of men just walked around naked at the parties okay and now yep my question would be this obviously it seems like he enjoys being around naked man the men are they all like is it like a sexual thing for them

or I'm hoping as well in addition some guys are just there because his parties are so fucking good that they're like whatever I'll walk around and just kind of like you know Donald I think it's a combo probably that's I think it's a that's how you know you throw a good party you know obviously yeah you got to be naked to get in here obviously this is a time when you're not really out as a gay dude so you know there's all kinds of levels and lines and places that you do stuff and stuff seems people don't even think about there's a guy we had a naked party while some guys are like yeah we had a naked party to the guys like

that whatever like you know what I mean it's just man yeah amazing pate that punch was amazing right okay yeah so he becomes known as a European party god wow I got got to get that title soldiers like him he would go into their cramped freezing muddy quarters and ask how they were which how's it go not good not good at all we just really bad really bad we ain't Doug's foot you did that I wish I could feel it was dead actually I might die now cuz you guys ate my foot I mean you it's bleeding a good amount in the mind while it was on my leg yeah well we wanted to be respectful that's not we were gonna go

respectful meteor park respect was not eating it was like it was not it's a very bony there's a lot of bones yeah it's the foot it's my foot was can I have a back all right as long as everyone seems to be doing good have a good night 160-year-old soldier said quote never before or since have I had such an impression of the ancient fabled god of war as I did when I looked upon the baron he seemed to me the perfect personification of Mars so he's awesome he throws awesome parties and he's an awesome general essentially he's a leader yeah I like he's a great leader and everybody likes it all right the

the you know the common soldiers weren't used to leaders speaking to them let alone asking them how they were how are you now drilling soldiers was very important because it it caused them to follow orders and horrible circumstances so there had been no consistent drilling of the army at all American officers thought leading drills was beneath them and they had subordinates do it so Frederick starts drilling right and on the first day of drilling he gets up at 3am and his servant braids his long gray hair as he focuses and sips coffee thinks about what he's gonna do and then he rides out in a thick blue coat I'm gonna

do a pigtail he rides out in a thick blue coat with a black beaver hat on his powdered wig now some of the men who are being drilled just have a blanket because they have no clothes right and this dude's got a beaver hat during drilling he yells and he swears obviously it's in German and the men love it and they laugh shines and but come yeah yeah okay so when they start laughing he takes it up a notch and gets louder and crazier and they love it more they had no idea what he was saying but they they pick up the drills quickly and people and other soldiers are now coming down to watch because it's so much fun yeah yeah

yeah so he's like it's like camp now I like he knew how to connect with them I guess yeah it's just like if you're like another generally like I don't know if he's doing this properly well they are picking up the drilling which is the important part right right Frederick picked a guy named Benjamin Walker to help he was a handsome 23 year old captain Ben spoke French and volunteered to interpret and Friedrich was so grateful that he hugged Ben when he said that okay soon he became his personal aid and a great friend some historians believe they were more Friedrich later said of meeting Ben

quote if I had seen an angel from heaven I should not have more rejoiced I mean look I have never in my life would I be like it was an angel before me similar to what you said when you saw me no no no I go why am I in this guy's garage there's a cat no you were like oh my god is this what glitter would be like if it was a person I said I said is he I said did he have a bad day or is he always like you said no you said this is like coming into the kingdom of God and seeing all the angels and I said it's like a demon said he was gonna try staying I don't you said no you said if you took all the rainbows in the world and pack them into

a case a human skin it would be this guy I said they made a dude from rage against the machine one at this time could not be openly gay as you can imagine it was punished very harshly in the army while he was at Valley Forge a soldier was drummed out for sodomy they like drummed you away he was forced to leave in front of the jeering crowd of soldiers had his coat turned inside out sometimes they forced the the guy to wear women's clothes and musicians played a special tune for the occasion yeah that's a bummer yeah camp discipline and morale improved after the drilling began and Washington then recommends Friedrich be

made a general second in command in the army Wow Congress approves it I mean if you thought you thought he was going for outfits he's probably got a whole new chest of clothes or he's like and now we step it up two words gloves the glove games back so yeah I mean they the Congress is like that we don't the drilling is is so effective and so good and turning morale around so much that Congress like well we don't know where we'd be without you at this point right but some in the camp hate him because he is a foreign interloper who they see is obsessed with gaining power it's nice to hear the

American yeah by the way it fit for a bunch of people who like were not like had I mean just had gotten there to be like we don't like it's really it's it's never you're all that's you're all European that's actually something they should say when you take the declaration to be a citizen and the last thing you say is yeah god damn I hate foreigners yeah I mean but it's amazing it's amazing that like to be so recently from Europe and to be like I don't like him he's not from here when we all still kind of have accents so we're not really from here either yeah but he's a different like it is a day he's a more

recent arrival so one of these guys is obviously Thomas Conway was the Inspector General who you know is now been replaced yeah who nobody likes so now he's like I don't like the way he's doing it he hasn't even tried to kill Washington and then another guy who hated him was General Charles Lee now Lee had been captured while drinking in a nightgown in a tavern what that's a drink come on I mean bar PJs maybe I thought about this maybe he maybe he arrived and his clothes were wet and he still wanted to party so he just changed into his nightgown are you trying to dissuade me from saying this is a

problem yeah I mean Dave I know you're dead drink but you're like look it's not crazy for a guy his clothes might have been wet and if you're about to fucking say that I killed your dad stop no I'm not stop every day on Twitter someone is accusing me of killing your father not I don't know your dad and didn't kill your dad don't even talk about it let's move forward okay so he's in the bar drinking in a nightgown he's having a nightcap in a nightgown all right let's keep going so what happened what did happen so he's in there what's his name Charles what it did happen what I what do you what what well now I'm a little sad because he brought

up my father Dave you did not and you said what did happen I mean he passed okay okay okay yeah yeah nothing to do with it I didn't I mean were that as a POW Lee had given the British tips on how to fight Washington okay hoping to cause a stalemate so then he could broker peace and be the big hero god isn't it amazing this is one thing that's just remarkable with our history is that it's just kind of it's the only thing that's advanced has been like the technology and really everything else it's just like there's everyone is always selfish look and this is I should point out this is more

Europeans and Americans but it's always how do I get ahead purse like the the level of selfishness it is marrow deep in us to be looking out for number one yeah it yeah I mean it's definitely seems to be a problem it's not going great right now and we're and we're and instead of and instead of us being like hey we should address this we're like hey we should give you more yeah or like hey what if we're less of a society hey hey what if we enable you um right so he's all out from South obviously Lee is known to be rude and tasteless an acquaintance said he was quote a great sloven wretchedly profane and a great

admirer of dogs that's the oh what kind of fucking breed is this piece of shit where's this dick look at that I love dog is now Lee hated Washington and he rarely did what he was ordered to do is second in command but he had a great tactical mind as a general and Lee obviously hates Friedrich and the European techniques he's teaching Lee wants to do ambushes and surprise attacks and Friedrich's more like let's do the normal battlefield way and he doesn't like he just doesn't like foreign generals telling their foreign anybody telling generals what to do I love I love the guy who's just kind of stuck to

that we should surprise well I think it's starting to be less surprising because we always do that well you know we need to do ambush oh that's what we always do yeah exactly a surprise sneak attack so Friedrich Friedrich the one of the things that they really didn't like that he was telling the generals was not to punish soldiers harshly to take it easy on the soldiers and so the generals were pissed but he just ignored their complaints because Prussian officers did not complain you you did not expect anything you just like the American officers are expecting to be

treated and and Prussian soldiers you just get what you get and that's what you deal with so he's like what the fuck are these guys doing right so the officers start undermining him anyway they can one example is they refuse very simple requests like reporting how many men they had under their command well that seems wrong I mean like all right I get it you don't love it whatever but so you're what you're saying you have what more than you do you just be like hey how many men do you have well six oh 80 I don't know yeah but we're trying to get a headcount so we yeah I haven't been able to get out there and every time I

try to start counting they start moving around so could you ask them to stand still I you know they're cold so yeah so so far we have some time it's somewhere between 10 and 8,000 hmm huge so we're huge we're gonna tighten that up though we're gonna really get right on that for you okay so it's like third day in a row German so okay great energy hmm okay well nothing I didn't know you were still here soon as you're gonna let me yeah no I actually count right now but you're here you know up in my face so I can't count right one okay now it's just two and I know why I'm here well three you just counting the birds oh you were

talking I lost count all right well just whenever you can we just really be super helpful to get a little one okay all right I'm leaving to all right oh fuck where was I to to I guess I'll start over cuz you kept screaming numbers I'm out of here so bye so so these guys are great yeah the British were slowly on the move right so the British are marching I'm I say slowly cuz it's really really hot and their general brought tons of stuff I'm just one of those people I just could never decide what to pack and what to leave behind it's always good to have a hoarder general yeah they had oh gosh could we can we could we bring

that oh please they had 15,000 carriages for the comforts of home oh yes come on you think I'm crazy when I pack to 15,000 carriages like what aren't you bringing is it possible to move the actual house they've got one of those wide load carriages there we are lovely put down the house think we'll set camp up here tonight yeah so they also had all the looted stuff that they looted from Philadelphia and soldiers had families that they brought so there's thousands of women and kids who are slowing down the March I that's uncommon I don't know a lot of times you're like I'm gonna say goodbye to my family and I'm gonna

bring them with I've honestly never been into war history like I find this kind of tedious and boring I just think this is an interesting story but war history doesn't I just don't I don't care well it seems like a lot of overhead could be cut if you just like I'll be back you see yeah you guys don't come but then you're like oh I can't have sex sure I guess you could I want their fair counterpoint right which is a great great stuff you're sure you know that's that's the right soldiers aren't they're not not going to there you know they're basically being trained to be animals I mean I'm sure some soldiers are mad well

I mean so that's that that's probably how you convince your wife you're like I'm bringing you because I must have sex I mean essentially they're gonna be gone for years right like when you go out across the sea for years I guess yeah right I don't know I mean it's not also not a great situation for kids yeah I mean it's a lot good news we're all going to that great family yes so it's free to go goes to Philadelphia hangs out with some local Germans gets a scope of the place sees how sees how's the British just sort of ruin Philadelphia and then he met and never yeah and then he goes and meets Washington in New

Jersey and Washington wants to attack the British but Lee said his plan was terrible so Washington decided to use a different general for the attack and free Rick goes I mean was was Lee like how long you do not have one surprise attack or ambush plan what are you even doing well hilariously it is exactly a surprise attack ambush that's the Washington Washington's like come on come on so free Rick goes to scope out the British and he sees they have set up in a place the British were just like you see that eight headed peacock is that it's made that Gloria Estefan's band I don't know are you I do think that might

be the Miami so they basically set up a place like in front of a courthouse in Montauk they just sitting ducks they just it's a terrible location because he's dressed like a yes and so he reports that back and now Lee wants in now he's like oh now I want to do it I got an idea let's do it so Washington lets him back in Lee Lee Lee so the free Rick stays awake day and night for like three days I think watching the British to see when they would start to get up and like start packing up their camp because that's the best time to attack them yeah yeah I mean it it's obviously like that is due diligence but it is amazing to be

like the plan is when they're really not paying attention we'll make them like what they're packing up so he sends word when they start packing up and Lee meanwhile is just moving his troops super slowly he doesn't use any reconnaissance he does they don't have a local guide and they get lost sure great so that's good well so it is kind of a surprise attack just by the time Lee arrives it's way too late they've already packed up it's daytime it's not morning anymore and Fredrick's like it's too late to attack and so he goes to a nearby town rents a room and crashes out because he's been up for fucking three days on I

assume math yeah and then he wakes up a couple hours later to gunfire and outside he sees Lee's men retreating and he goes out so the guy the guy he didn't plan anything got there late and then stuck to the plan and worse than that didn't want to do it someone else replaced him then he wanted to do it when he heard about it and then got put back in charge ego and then fucked it all right right okay oh nice so he goes outside and all the men are cursing and they're mad at Lee and they still want to fight but he's telling him to retreat so free then takes command of Lee's troops and rallies them to go back and fight let me

just get my big butt out for time it will go and they're being led by giant duck thing and so as he's leading the men he passes Lee who is retreating and Lee I well I thought we were pretty sure we're done which way we got the wrong way to retreat and Lee asked him what's he what he thinks he's doing and Fredrick has leading your troops into battle and Lee says that's good because I am quote tired out I am snookered he's like I've been up for three days and three nights motherfucker yeah I know and I'm also tired I've been up since I I've been up three days and three nights I got one hour sleep back at the pad yeah I'm

tired too I've been up since I've been up since 8 30 late 8 30 that's when you were supposed to we would have got I know and we would have gotten there sooner if we hadn't all wanted continental breakfasts but here we are good luck with my man is your room still open I can do for a kid you you tell you why I ought to why so all of Fredrick's training pays off it's the first time the Americans showed discipline in battle he's a great battlefield commander I mean essentially we're talking about like just dead guys screaming or about to die screaming guys everywhere and smoke so thick they can't see like it's

crazy but they all follow his drills and up until this point the the Americans had not been or I mean the soldiers of Washington I had not been winning this was like a yeah no they know not at all no okay okay so the British and a retreating in confusion come on turn out at the 18,000 wagons around but now Lee is blamed because this could have been a total route like they should have just slaughtered the British right so Washington now asks Friedrich to lead the troops into the Hudson Valley while he and other generals court martial league I mean okay I look I guess you're showing like a lot of faith and

Friedrich but surely like you can be like yeah like we'll court martial him soon let's keep yeah yeah yeah I get that yeah but whatever you got it you got it you know it's not it's military there it's gonna take eight of us to court martial so you do you want to do the war yeah okay I'll do it now Friedrich doesn't notice the men are confused and pissed a foreigner has been giving command and then he tops that off by court martialing a soldier for taking possession of a house that he wanted and disrespecting him wow the officers let him off of the court martial so this makes Fred look terrible and Washington

now thinks Friedrich cannot be given a field command so again that's like a dumb evaluation well it will his first time leading he's it's almost like crazy with power sure sure sure but I mean did we even see the place it might have been nice yeah yeah no that's a good point I mean I didn't really think about that so Washington asked for you to step down and go back to being inspector general and he just he's just dumbfounded like he can't believe after what he did he can't believe this is happening so he tries to go over Washington's head and go straight to Congress Wow and Washington finds out

and writes his friends in Congress saying promoting Friedrich over American officers would cause problems in the ranks and he wouldn't stand for it so Congress isn't going to go against Washington Friedrich actually writes demands for Congress and threatens to quit and go back to Europe if they don't meet them and Congress loves them but they don't do anything and sounds like Congress they say he has to take it up with Washington himself and Washington's like yeah no that's not happening right he just can't believe his bluff was called because he actually has no he has no he has he can't yeah I was gonna say

it sounds there's nowhere yeah I was gonna say yes I was gonna say like it sounds a bit like an empty threat like I'm going back to Europe you wouldn't want that go back to Europe I don't want that well he does want that but nobody in Europe wants him well yeah but I mean he's like he's all of his success has been found here yeah and again these like first-generation Americans like we don't like for we don't not like foreigners so if you're not from here originally like us lover leave it there's something pretty recently yeah these colors don't run no they trot so he stays now he does become a little

more blunt he wasn't getting a higher position so he doesn't spare feelings anymore he convinced Washington then there needs to be a coat of conduct for all the soldiers and began creating military regulations for for all now Lee is bitter as he's out of the military now and he starts spreading rumors about Friedrich okay he's that he's a disc he has no pants dance well that he's a he's a disgrace in Prussia and the rumors are so bad some of Friedrich's staff quit on him so thick Friedrich is furious and challenges lead to a duel I we go finally I was gonna say when's the dual part of course is a chicken

shit and just apologizes and Friedrich let's it go I really it would be really great to time travel back to dual days just to really pick up on the nuance of the dual game it's such a chest it really is it's just like it's like the ultimate bluff caller and then sometimes the bluff gets bluff called and then you're like shit I'm gonna like fire a gun and then you get there to fire a gun and you and you both shoot and there's a different direction or you do or the guy yeah there's or like your your valets are like all right he doesn't yeah he's like my guy don't want to do this either you know it's a while so um yeah so the

duel doesn't happen and he he he lets it go Frederick Frederick lets it go so he's um he's in a lot of debt now he he spends Friedrich yeah he spends like he has a huge salary which he doesn't and right he spends on himself he buys friends gifts he loans people money he spent an an insane amount of money on clothes once spending more than a year's pay on ornaments for his hat what's going on I mean good lord we are this hat culture really well like a man I don't how do you even do that just like a Christmas tree you're in a store and you see an amazing ornament for your hat and the guys like that's gonna be

three thousand dollars talking like I gotta have it if you ever been in hot topic obviously I'm just so much just ornaments like with like a friend to be like hey man you realize it's just a hat is it but I just it's so much more my neck is so sore he had friends paying his debt and he lobbied Congress for a friend I'd be like look I'll pay your debt but stop with the hat he finished he finished his manuscript for the military code of regulations in spring in 1779 it has been called one of the most significant and enduring documents in American military history it's basically America's new military Bible

but Congress refuses to pay Friedrich and his staff a bonus for it and Friedrich is pissed and thought they weren't being paid because they were all foreign officers right so he goes to dinner party thrown by congressman Henry Lawrence and which is the what's his name Lawrence dad Hamilton's buddy Lawrence dad all right and so he has a deep down he's like your kid likes to party and so loudly at the dinner party he demands to know why the bonus was not paid and Lawrence is embarrassed and he's like wait the Treasury doesn't have any money like we're out of money we can't pay anybody bonuses and for threatens to go

back to Europe if they aren't paid so he's doing it again just a bad through like you tell me we said go hurt this yes but this time I will go back double mad sicker a bullshit yeah so Lawrence is like this and I can't we can't do anything and tries to laugh it off and save the dinner party but Friedrich's face is just a fucking rage ball and he leaves and never speaks to Lawrence ever again who was a friend of his okay I like that Lawrence is like you're going to affect the vibe I understand you're mad and I understand the Treasury has no money but the time for this is not during a dinner dude you are and I don't use

this term I don't I don't want to use this term but you are a party bummer like well huge party bummer I'm not trying to ruin the party I understand how important a good party is I was just trying to tell you it's total bullshit and when I see all the the layout you have here beautiful thread of charcuterie's and sort of breaded items of dipping areas and just started to think maybe there's more money than that I this is my personal money you're talking about the government's money the government send give me that money give me that money the money your personal money why would I I need money to buy different

seeds to put on hats okay so this is where we have a problem you have so much shit on your hat right now that your head is sideways yes and that's what I'm saying without this without the extra income how will I balance the left side I'm going to get a scoliosis with your neck's gonna snap like it's we're worried about you I'm aware you nobody knows my neck is snapping more than I don't buy this so this I need money to buy a toboggan for the left part of the hat sell the other stuff ridiculous statement from a foolish person no if you excuse me I'm going to get on the bike that's on my hat you look like a shed

pegboard I look like one because I kind of am nobody nobody is dubious buting's effects that I look like a bunch of stuff a blacksmith hangs outside of their shanty yes this friendship is not only over it's super hey God yeah yeah God you get out well by the way could you maybe open the door for me I can't get through it what only half of it's open on account of the things I have on this sombrero so it was very common for free to just cut friends off who we felt were disloyal he's very over he goes with big brash very over sensitive he's very quick tempered he liked to lie about his accomplishments or obviously lie about

what he would do a biographer quote it took a very patient and tolerant soul to maintain a friendship with him over the long haul he snapped at friends and then he apologized when he was in a better mood after a fight with friend Richard Peters he wrote and apologized and Peters angrily said it was fine and he was used to seeing two free tricks one Baron Steuben the uninformed and the other Baron Steuben acquainted with facts well that's okay I guess I'm too bad anyway what chums anyway the good ones here want to go see a movie so he never married free look never married or had kids besides Ben he also befriended young

officer William Billy North Billy is said to have been romantically linked to both Ben and a free Rick one author claims his relationship with Ben was sexual and with a free Rick was a romantic mentorship the three men stayed close their entire lives sometimes living as roommates many believe sometimes they just put sometimes I just hang them on my hat many believe they were a thruple nice very modern yeah yeah that is to be to be in a thruple of men at that time is like you are very yeah very progressive now if I got a thing I have a chicken in my throat what just now you didn't see a hole what I yeah

there was when you dipped out of the camera for like four seconds you will chicken yeah now it's in my throat if anyone suspected his gay lifestyle they didn't care because he was such a valuable military man they so they now wanted him to organize the military so that meant he needed to inspect the entire army and he only trusted himself to do it so every single soldier over months and officers he did everyone he was shocked yes he would he do like a thousand a day he was shocked to learn the army kept no list of items of what they gave to soldiers so men after they were done could just go home with their

muskets and the uniforms and stuff right so he makes officers start keeping logs of supplies like I said he's inspecting like a thousand guys a day he wanted to know where every soldier was and what every item they had was officers who didn't know he screamed at and sometimes had arrested so everyone hates this no one wants right right because the soldiers can't take shit everyone's mad about yeah right yeah but it's what you need to do I mean well to have yeah and it also starts the United States long relationship with not taking care of the soldiers once they oh yeah even the staff who had to

write up a report if someone staff were mad because they would have to write up a report if someone just lost a sock like anything no one likes it they want to know what a sock is but it works the soldiers are better equipped so in the 79 80 winner it's the worst it's the worst of the war blizzards buried men as they slept when wind would rip apart tents and their clothing and men were starving and Friedrich has the inspection set up regiments are they don't have officers like the officers just bailed and went home on leave because they're like I can't it's too cold and I just I have a dog and a fire back there

so right yeah soldiers did not have enough clothing quote sufficient to cover their nakedness in this severe season so it's brutally cold and dudes are just many just I guess Dixon out like freezing like you're just Dixon boots yeah it's insane Washington was really upset to read the reports some regiments were down to just a few guys states weren't giving soldiers what they needed to fight so Friedrich goes to Congress to get more men meanwhile in New Jersey all the guys are threatening to leave if they don't get food and then right at this moment the French decide they're gonna send more troops and that

that gets Congress to start strong arming the states to kick in more men because they can't be like it's just an army of French guys there's some momentum right yeah right yeah and then and then Friedrich is sent to West Point to assess West Point and he's there and he sees one soldier's name is Arnold last name hmm and this is just weeks after Benjamin Arnold has been you know exposes a traitor that'll deal Benedict Arnold yeah what I say oh Benedict yeah so Friedrich talks to the Arnold kid Jonathan Arnold and he asked him how how he could he keep such a terrible name and the guys like I

don't I don't want this name like I what am I gonna do it's my name and he's doing this in front everybody it's that inspection he pulls him out of line and everyone's watching he goes what I can't I can't do it's my name and Friedrich says how would you feel about changing your last name to Steuben don't do it what is going on like if you're there like this is super weird I thought he was just gonna see if we had supplies okay so now your name is Jonathan okay back in line Steuben so the soldiers in front of everybody's like yeah okay and then Friedrich like pushes him and supports him to send his name

change petition to Congress like he's just like so here's the paperwork you just have to so now you so now you have my last name how do you feel now you're my son okay you're gonna need to start changing I own you if you're Steuben you're my property now you can live on my hat so he I'm around this point it's it starts at dawn on that he's not gonna be going back to Europe and he's gonna be stuck in America he doesn't like America he said of American politicians quote the states instead of vying with each other to see who should do the most calculate only to furnish the least to the general good 17 fucking 79 comfort

comfort in our 1779 nothing has changed no no in 1780 Washington sends a freeway to to the second in command in the south Nathaniel Green troops in the south are a mess they've been fighting the British in their total wreck so they wanted to free to go down there and create a new army and Green and Friedrich go to Washington's house and Friedrich writes about how ugly Washington's house is man he really doesn't pull this is what I've been to the general should stay in the shit stage it's terrible needs ornaments I've got hats with my class it's just so it's just so fucking yeah it's so it's weird it's yeah it's weird I mean it's

certainly just like because I also feel like you know like they're in the middle of a war and he's like boy I've heard of a paint job crown molding yuck so he in Richmond they learn the Virginians think their militia is awesome so they weren't recruiting new members the Virginians they're like we're as good as it could but in truth their militia is garbage if you can imagine any sort of American thinking that what they had is awesome but it's actually garbage that's that I know it's unique and rare but that's what this was sort of hard I'm trying to picture it because it's like we normally are pretty good self-evaluate

yeah what's going on and we normally are really good at kind of piecing together where things are at and giving a fair evaluation that's not blinded by just you know bullshit yeah okay um yeah okay I guess I see sure trying to so the reason they thought that they had an amazing militia is because in a recent battle the British had been fighting and then retreated and so they're like well they got scared and left but in actuality the British just went to help with another battle they're like this one doesn't matter it's time for tea oh all right we're going back look at them run look at them run fucking babies

so Frida told Governor Thomas Jefferson to put a cannon and a small fort at a place on the James River which would hold off the British if they came up in ships and Jefferson just ignored it I feel like we're not going to hear about something happening where they need to and then right after that a guy named Benedict Arnold led the British force up the river and that's Benedict stupid and Arnold was stunned at how easy it was to take now Jefferson is frantic and he hopes that Friedrich can hold off the brits but Friedrich's like why I told you to put the fucking cannon in the place and they I told the other

guys too too they just didn't hear me and there's no militia men they just don't have enough there's no weapons because they're not funding them it's impossible and so they take Richmond almost without losing a man like it's just a fucking breeze one guy one guy fell down its brain just leg yeah oh even after this he cannot get Jefferson to provide more supplies and men because he's like cuz it won't happen again dude Friedrich wrote what are the odds Friedrich wrote quote my situation here is really very embarrassing and he's the default guy in charge of defending Virginia but I can't defend Virginia right and on top of

all this Jefferson is writing him several times a day about every little thing once asking if the militia could switch from hats to cloth caps and if we do cloth and if Friedrich would come to model a cloth cap for him what is going on that's crazy why why you can't find another head Jefferson all my friends don't have head we smoke pot but yeah you don't smoke pot and like lose your actual perspective on you could just be really high thinking about hats I don't this but that but could what year were mirrors this is like this is the worst thing I've ever heard about I mean obviously obviously marrying and

rabies but but this makes me think he's a fucking idiot this is like pulling your starting quarterback to see if they can model the away so could someone else do it no it just shows how fucking detached from reality our founding fathers were fucking detached from reality I know and we're like everything they said is we're like don't fuck around like that alone right there should undercut it forever anytime up someone's just like the founding fathers would never want us to mess with that there the guy is trying to pull one of the better battle leaders because he's like can I see what you look like in a

different hat would you come here and model hats for me well we're in the middle of a war we're kind of getting our ass handed to us I think it's probably a hat issue so would you mind coming here and just trying out a couple different this is pretty important all right so please and we're I mean I mean again wait look it's over at this point it's not even worth getting into it anymore I mean you and I the whole time of this show because like that's not gonna be good that can be good and it's good so it's over obviously at this point but let's at least stop with the fawning over the fountains I mean it's just not

enough enough I mean their dicks have been over sucked we're good so so now for jeans are not fans of Friedrich and he's not well because probably because they're also like yeah what's he's saying we're not yeah that's crazy he's not fans of theirs he found their state pride ridiculous when you know how easily Richmond had fallen he's like how are you guys prideful of this huh now imagine that as a country yeah so he becomes even stricter and more authoritarian which makes the Virginians even angrier he's working with civilian militias not army soldiers and civilians are not used to being ordered

around especially by a foreign guy right he embarrassed key state so in other words they're upset he's doing his job he embarrassed key state politicians and yelled at militiamen for trying to recruit young boys okay once a militiamen brought a recruit and Friedrich was happy until he saw that it was a child I'm ready to go hi let's fight this is my little teddy bear Bobby hey Bobby also wants a gun oh you have any diapers and made a boomer my lord this is not good at all I'm this many how old are you two five I am small bones ready for battle that's not an advantage small brittle bones break

quickly yeah look get in my hat it's got a little door so he ordered Friedrich orders the kid be measured his height measured I love that there's like a side tailor the boy takes off his shoes so in other words to get into battle it was basically like trying to get on a roller coaster at six yeah you must be this tall to die in battle the boy takes off his shoes and Friedrich sees there is paper crumpled up in them so he would look taller who I mean he's a child you think like four pieces of crumpled paper are gonna put him from baby to adult Friedrich knelt and asked him how old he was while patting his head with quote

a hand trembling with rage we don't know what the boy said about his age but Friedrich then shouted that the man who brought the boy was a scoundrel trying to cheat his country and he sent he's fighting at an eight-year-old level asshole he sent the boy home and then forcibly enlisted the man instead ah that's great that's great after this welcome aboard Virginians seemed afraid to quote bring in the little dwarves and children they formerly counted upon wow so it is a whole I mean not that it's strange to have me I mean we like part of our economy's child base but a lot of their

militia army was kind of just funneling children into the army to take the place of adults so what a good system I mean it no was nobody going like hey we probably should change our attitude it this might go south Friedrich was furious with Jefferson for failing to do just the simplest of tasks or lean on civilians even a bit to get supplies and men so he now has a really short fuse he's just snapping all the time and he wants out of Virginia Virginia wants him gone the only thing he liked about Virginia was a local delicacy of black snakes and he had his men go out in the woods and forage for

black snakes for him to eat I look I know what it's like to fall in love with a local it's a different time yeah like the black snakes sure mm-hmm yeah well I any idea what kind of snake that I don't I mean yeah I didn't even think about what a domestic black snake is it's not domestic yeah like I mean they're looking for them yeah okay there's pictures of them there it's a it's a black snake it's a they're harmless to people at great for the yard they keep away mice and snakes it sounds like a gardener type snake okay so a black gardener there's two common black snakes in Virginia the black rat snake

and the black racer so you know there you go they're just black snakes looks like he was just like eating that Lake Linguine mmm delicious so in July the stress the heat was too much for Frank and he moved into a doctor's home and stayed for two months he was suffering from exhaustion a quote skin eruption and gout hmm Jesus well you too many black snakes they're rich boil oh I mean that's what I think they're called right he had worry boyles a skin eruption I mean that's you got a hole coming out of you yeah yeah it's a new hole I'm making yeah stress cyst he stood as he read

reports about his failures in Virginia and when General Lafayette was sent to replace him he didn't even care quote my presence in this state has become entirely useless then Lafayette asked him to come to Williamsburg Virginia to help fight Friedrich quote my gout was cured at once he rushed to join Lafayette hoping to command again what my gout was the doctor's like it is not no it's gone or actually no the doctor probably was like that's how it's totally you get a letter and then your gouts gone that's it if you get a motivating letter your gout vanishes at Williamsburg he's back with Washington he's happier than he's

been in a year he's saying it was quote how great is this he says quote it's the happiest time I've spent in America oh that's nice Washington let him let him lead a division and he fought in the battle of Yorktown which the Americans won beating Lyme General Cornwallis relax dirty Lyme murderers of so many people a much higher body count than the Germans and World War two the British the Irish stop it's American Indian what they ever heard of a ever ever heard of a growing pain that's how they and then look at it

now it's all working good the British are an unrelenting slaughter party so Frederick whose name I realize I keep doing different ways but Frederick is the way I want to say I like is the way they're supposed I like when you I like that you're I like the pull-up you're doing at the it's hard you're going for a great yeah it's it's it's hard to do because I know the way I'm supposed to pronounce it the German way but my I bet it's my English I bet it's free American this doesn't Friedrich it's it's you know what's great you know it's great nobody's gonna I know nobody'll man nobody'll make a word word not even a

word no one will say anything because everyone is so kind Frank was now in more debt than ever he pawned a gold watch to get some care for Billy who was sick after Yorktown senior French and American commanders were throwing lavish parties and Friedrich felt ashamed being a guest but never a host so he decided to throw one last shebang quote I will give one grand dinner to our allies should I eat my soup with a wooden spoon forever after that's quite a penance worth a party he paid for the party by selling his favorite horse wow that horse like oh thank you it was good to bond with you

yes we have a bond that would rarely be seen by men and beasts but you're off now because I want to have what I'm calling the shindig of this am I going to the party at least no you would be sold and potentially used for what in the fuck just happened I've been through so much shit with you yes and I've enjoyed all of it you are a very trusty unbelievably loyal the Virginians were right well look don't be so negative about the party it's gonna be how I don't care we're gonna have a phone machine in the fuck gonna be a foam night do you have any feelings for anything at all yeah I for sure do because when I talk

about the foam I get real excited I can't believe you just changed my name oh sorry that's what we call it oopsie anyway I gotta go I'm doing the frills for some of the ribbons so he decides to head north Billy is too sick to travel so he limbs he leaves him half the money he has which is $10 oh man you get half of everything there you go get two happy meals so he goes to Philly and very begs Congress for back pay he's owed eight thousand five hundred dollars but they only give him 1700 damn man just so typical and then he just mostly has to give that to the people he owes money to he he goes back to work as Inspector

General but then the war ends in 1783 and that's it he doesn't really have any prospects to do anything right he can't go back to Europe Lafayette is the only European officer who's given like respect for the American success he hangs out with Washington for a bit he goes to a very emotional farewell dinner with Washington and the officers the last letter Washington ever wrote as an Army commander was a thank you to a Frederick but then it's over he's trying to figure stuff out he tries to establish a US standing army but Americans don't want an army can you imagine that's just such a strange yeah he was he was just in the

wrong era they they already owed veterans so much money they don't want to pay anymore Congress is ignoring his letters and plans and requests for back pay but they finally give him a little bit of money and a ceremonial sword Wow that's awesome like here's $800 and a magical sword Friedrich is very upset by Congress's treatment of himself and the soldiers because the soldiers also got nothing he thought America could never become a Democratic Republic if they kept leaders who put their self-interest over the common good well hardy hard ass all should we dig him up to laugh at his

stupid skull face he reviled the politicians and said they only cared about money not the men who fought still he cannot stop spending money what's his deal that's probably why Congress was like look we're not giving him money it just goes Billy and Ben complained constantly to each other about how much money he spends Billy he quote is and will be for all eternity eating the calf in the cows belly Wow Wow very that's that is such a good comp to us as a society I mean we are eating the calf and the cow is belly he I've ever met people like this it's it's so weird and bewildering because they just don't

understand money and it's and how things work it's like your mind cannot comprehend part of you almost like envies it because it's like wow you have no you don't seem to care but yeah I am yes I have I have a relative who I'm like yeah okay he buys a big house in New York which he called the Louvre Wow all right so at least he's like kind of he plans to furnish it grandly and entertain the elites well he better you can't call it the Louvre there's be like all we got to foosball table and he spends all the money Congress gave him on luxuries for the house three new carriages which he doesn't need at all

and books books are very expensive at this time after he spends all the money he has no money to throw parties and he just sits home alone with his dog which are I mean this is fine like I'm totally now with him well I was just gonna say like I can't get angry at a guy who just sits in this place did he have a fly no he didn't have a pet fly he's not crazy he's like a normal right within two years he has to sell the house and he moves in with Ben and Ben's new wife you know what you call it when you sell that you're going to move so he moves in with Ben and Ben's wife which must have been an awkward situation Ben and Billy try

to create a budget for him to live by but he just stonewalls them he just keeps trying to get into get rich quick schemes which always fall apart obviously once he got very angry at Billy's financial advice and called him a bourge which is a French slur for a gay man he knew Billy had his best interests at heart once saying quote scold me Billy as often as I deserve it that is to say scold me always hmm I've said that to you before it's like pre-sex talk yeah I've been naughty haven't I Billy but he actually still has some land and he eventually settled on it in a little forest forested area in in New York he

wants to build a mansion but only managed to build a two-room cabin on November 24th 1794 a Friedrich secretary found him with his left side paralyzed and he died four days later on November 28th at age 64 so he had a stroke he's trying to get a read on his age it seemed I mean it seemed like he would even be old I mean when he got to yeah when he got to America in the early 40s right it's crazy yeah this is 20 years of this I know yeah I mean we're we're in 1794 I mean yeah I mean basically we did the war and then it just kind of we glossed over and he's kind of like looking for his next thing to do

he left nearly everything to Billy and Ben but also left some money in his library to a young man who he had his has his live-in companion for the last few years hmm years later workers were laying a road over his grave and digging they found the coffin and took scraps of his clothes as souvenirs so little little birds yet small parrots and that's cool it's not like okay I'm of two minds one is that's fucked up the other is who gives I never under I've never like you're dead who fucking cares like what what is stealing from the dead is the most harmless I mean you should like there is I mean you know

just because it's like this societal respect thing but it's also just like yeah what like you want my shoes yeah I'm not using them take them and that's why I want a fully open casket and I'm gonna be totally nude okay I have it on record yeah recorded yeah I I want I want actually you know what I want I want fully nude and just the bottom half open I want that half casket okay so that when people are saying goodbye they just kind of have to look at my pale legs and genitals so Ben pays Ben pays for his coffin to be placed in a new grave Billy and Ben would both marry and have families but they remained

extremely close and frequently won't wrote to one another about their love for each other and their love for Friedrich Friedrich had an enormous impact on the US Army without his training it is unclear if the Americans would have won right yet no one really knows him his blue book was used for many years and West Point as a military Academy was formed in large part due to his ideas yeah it's crazy not really it like you know I don't know it it it's amazing to hear that we even back then because you know I think there is you are able to separate the idea of the people who send people to war or the

people who sacrifice for war and the people who maybe sometimes inflate or bullshit the cause there is there there is like you know Valor in people who are like willing to go do that stuff for sure it's just that's why it's like you have to be precious when you're going to send someone into a dangerous situation but it seems like we constantly are like you know this is the way this is how you get ahead this and we will take care of you and then we never do and it's amazing to trace it back oh yeah I mean this is this is something Howard Zinn covers in his people's history the United States and it was probably the

one thing that made me go what the fuck like that when I was like 16 I read it and I was just like wait what like we just yeah the essentially the the the war of independence was a war for rich people to stop having to send tax back and nobody else really benefited and they used all the poor people and the farmers to fight their war and then gave them nothing they were like rebellions against the government for for not paying the veterans like right yeah I mean we've never done anything else here we all we do is jingoistic nonsense get people riled up go to war and then fuck them over and

it's so effective I mean it really is shockingly effective that you are able to you know I mean we I don't know it's like we I mean you never I guess at some point I feel like you would expect if you look at this country like we're all kind of in the jail together you would expect us to turn on the warden but it seems like we just they're like trying to get fellow prisoners toothbrush well it's like I said to the day we have a prison with two wardens and all the prisoners are fighting over which warden is better that's all it is that's America in that show yeah yeah and it is like you know you would you would think

at some point we would just go oh yeah you know what we should just like fucking get rid of the wardens and then we can have all their stuff and split yeah but I don't know and it it I don't know it's just like yeah it's amazing it's amazing to hear that even back then when you were kind of fighting for the independence of the country that even then people like we don't have the money yeah it's like wait what I mean for genius just did not want to get taxed and pay for shit they wanted to win the war without paying for it that's what they wanted and it's also amazing that you know how we recently I mean in my

lifetime also had to kind of re-legislate whether if someone was gay were they you know could they fight for the country which is always one of the like it's so great like that it's just crazy to be like in I mean it's crazy in every way but it's also like wait you're telling me for like battle which this country is obsessed with that you are going to be like no no no not someone hold on now yeah but I don't know that it's a wild story crazy it checks a lot of crazy yeah it does research was by Brittany Cohen Brown sources the Jill master of Valley Forge by Paul Lockhart male male intimacy in early America by

William Benjamin and the life of Frederick William von Steuben major general in the Revolutionary Army by a Frederick cup I hope you're happy well I'm furious also the hats by the way how crazy is it they they make you take your hat off during the national anthem in this country when we're basically a country of hats you'd think they would be like everyone put a hat on it's the anthem my they'd be like handing out hat like if you didn't bring a hat to the game they'd be like give my wife gets so mad it's so mad when we're somewhere like a game and I won't stand up or take off my hat for the national anthem yeah they

are I was talking about buddy Luke and he was telling me that when he was a kid his dad his dad was like you can stand if you want but I'm not going to his dad would just so that's what Fin's dealing with but he was is that would just sit there during and people are just like yeah it's wrong yeah yeah now people don't understand that in most countries you don't they don't do that no people don't know people have no fucking clue yeah it's like that's just kind of a weird thing it's weird everyone thinks it's weird it's weird it is weird it is weird to be like all right let's watch the Falcons of the 49ers let's let's

worship America as you drive home from the game with your truck or the giant flag on the back yeah where you just paid four hundred dollars for popcorn cheddar pretzels and then they and then they have a military guy stand up for his service to the country but but they aren't paying for his fucking health care yeah right right while they fly jets over that the fuel could just go to that guy in his family yeah yeah good times God bless God bless this mess