The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 575 - Rickey Henderson - Part Two

Episode Date: March 21, 2023

Comedians Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds examine baseball great Rickey Henderson.  Sources Tour Dates Redbubble Merch   Squarespace Helix Sleep Harry's

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Oh, okay. So some fun banter before. More mustache, right? You're listening to the dollop. This is an American History podcast for each week. I, Dave Anthony, read a story from American history to person. All right, not great momentum.

Gareth Reynolds, who has no idea what the topic is going to be about. And also I am now referred to as the human sound effects machine. You're too invested in your name, you know what I mean? What a crazy thing to say to someone. It's just not something that anyone would ever say to anyone. My name is my name and I'm invested in it

because it's my name. You're too invested, you left off the two. Explain what that means. The guy who's tried to change my name to Gary for almost a decade, honestly. There's a great example of how you can't even have fun. It was fun for a minute. I mean, the truth is that you goaded me into the whole thing.

You just sort of conned me into it. You just started saying it and I was like, okay, whatever. And then it became this kind of like weird connection you have to our fans and it's just gotten out of hand. Do you understand how many times I get sent the article on Twitter, the name Gary is going extinct and people go, really sorry to hear about this.

That's too bad. For me, it has nothing to do with me. I could give a shit. What? Only because of the connection you've. It sounds like people are worried about you and you can't let them in, you can't be vulnerable. I'm not going to have you, Gary, everything.

So no, we're not gonna talk about it. Let's go to the intro. This is the dollop. I control the music. This is the dollop. This is the dollop. Gary. Gareth, god damn it.

This is the dollop. The dollop. Right now you're listening to the dollop. Go to the music. I called it, quote, his jam patch. Jam patch? I'm the fucking hippo guy. Babe, okay.

My name's Gary. My name's Gary. Wait. Is it for fun? And this is not going to come to Tickly Clod County. Oh, okay. This is like ad-hoc-y. I'm a five-part coefficient.

My room is clean. Now hit him with the puppy. You both present sick arguments. Don't sleep though, hippo. Don't sleep though, hippo. Actually, pardon me. I like Gary. No.

I sleep done, my friend. No. No. We're all down in the car. Okay, well, now the intro's over. Oh, god, what year is it? I'm fucking wasted. I'm fucking wasted.

God, I'm shit-canned. Oh. Who's your favorite Avenger? Um, Frank. Mine's Mark. I love Mark. The guy who collects stones. Gareth, we're brought to you by Helix Sleep.

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I have absolutely... Oh. I'm not possible to both. Okay, I don't know how I sleep. Okay, thanks, buddy. What you just said is not possible. You're too critical, aren't you? Well, you're making things up.

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Join us. We're also brought to you in part by Squarespace. Squarespace, of course... Do we use it, Dave? Oh, yeah. It's a website situation, domains, websites, online stores, marketing tools, analytics. You and I use it.

I would love to know if we use it for everything. Oh my God, do we? Gareth, you and I both have our websites with Squarespace. I have a website? Yeah, you do. It's magical. You can find all your tour dates there.

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Every single one. Now, does that feel like we like them? It feels like we can't get enough of them. All right, relax. Like, we're... It feels sometimes like Squarespace has asked us to leave the property of their headquarters. I want to wear their skin!

All right, buddy, let's go back to the computer. Yeah. And you want a domain? You can buy a domain through that. I got my hair extensions there. You got to get your hair extensions. 24-7 customer support, which I find very, very, very important.

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on your first purchase of a website or domain. And when you're ready to launch, do a countdown. That's always fun to count yourself down for 10. Nine. Yep, just like that. We're not gonna do the whole thing. Dave, I will be doing some stand-up comedy

across the greatest nation. Six. In the world, the United States of America. Five. When this comes out, March 21st, Tuesday, I'll be in Lexington, Kentucky. March 22nd, I'll be in St. Louis. Thursday, March 23rd,

I'll be at the Comedy Club of Kansas City. March 24th and March 25th, I'll be in Des Moines, Iowa. March 26th, I'll be at the Funny Bone in Omaha, Nebraska. Then April 12th, I'll be at the Tacoma Comedy Club doing a crowd work show. So that's where I'll be chatting to people in the crowd and I'll be filming it. It's gonna be a real fun time.

That's Tacoma Comedy Club in Washington. Then the following night, April 13th, I'll be at the Spokane Comedy Club. April 14th, Friday and April 15th, Saturday. I'll be in Bozeman, Montana at Last Best Comedy. Then May 5th, I'll be in Los Angeles. That beautiful place. I love living inside at the Dynasty Typewriter.

May 18th, I'll be in Phoenix, Arizona at Stand Up Live. Then July 12th, New York Comedy Club in New York, New York. July 13th in Connecticut at the New York Comedy Club. And July 15th, I'll be in Pittsburgh doing a WDVE Comedy Fest. April 18th, no, there's more coming. That's it. That was in August.

I don't believe any of that. Okay. It's interesting that you feel like you don't believe it. Not a word. So you don't believe I'm at any of those places? Nope. Okay. Also have a special called England Weed and the Rest.

You can find it on the All Things Comedy YouTube page. Just look it up. And we have another podcast. What's it called, Stinky? The Pastimes. That's right. Each week, Stinky and I welcome a guest onto the show. We go through an old newspaper.

You're supposed to not laugh at yourself like that. I mean, colonies think he's fun. And I'm having a good time. And we also have a Patreon where you can, look, he's laughing at the point. Shut your mouth, Luke. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where you can go and watch weird stuff on Patreon,

patreon.com slash the... But weird stuff? Do you mean like turtles fucking cans? Wow. Mitch McConnell right now needs us. We don't need to, he might have passed away by the time we released this. But we're not gonna get political.

Crack his shell. Let me tell you something we're not gonna do. Crack his shell. We're not gonna revel in the idea of when a politician who has screwed over tons of people is having a hard time. We're not gonna do that. Either party.

Look, if there's a time to disagree with someone's politics and it's not when they fell on their pillow necks. Good God, have some class. He's a sexual being. Man, listen, anyone with two scrotums is gonna be. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. December 1984, Ricky Henderson is traded to the New York Yankees.

They signed him to a five year contract for 8.6 million. So he got the money. Last contract was under a mill. He gets the money. His old Oakland teammates start talking shit about his reaction to not getting the million dollar contract. Sure.

He spent the next year saying he might not play as hard and whining about it constantly. Sure. But they should have offered a million dollars. They 100 value it. They 100% did. And so now this is the guy who's going to come and meet the New York press.

Who are some of the most awful people on the face of the earth? What? When did it change? We knew it had to become better. Now, Ricky never dreamed of being a Yankee. Sure. As most kids, I think playing baseball

are like, well, that's the pinnacle. Ricky wanted to play football. He really didn't care. As a kid, he idolized O.J. Simpson. Same here. I'm sorry. Yeah. Well, after.

After the murder. Go ahead. He loved the Oakland Raiders. Now, New York reporters think everyone should want to be a Yankee. And they make it very clear, the New York press, that players need to play ball because they can destroy them in the eyes of the fans.

Okay. They're very upfront about that. Did I mention all white, except for one at this point? It's just race stuff you're doing here. It's just getting a little crazy. The Yankee uniforms have a belt buckle and buttons. Why belt buckles? Just, can we not?

I mean, you're the Yankees. You're giving someone $10 million. You can't fit pants. The big old confederate. Oh, God. Trucker belt. You can open a beer on it. Yeah.

So this is going to make sliding painful because he's been sliding on his chest, but now there's buttons there. Kind of how like you sleep on your eyes and ears. I keep it real. So yeah, so it seems it's, if you're, the idea that you're like, look, unfortunately, you're going to have to change how you play the sport

because we're married to the fashion. Sorry, buddy. We got buttons on her. Sorry about that. Sorry. They're big, too. They're big, giant. Fortunately, we put a plank of wood

on the front of everyone. So he, in spring training, starts trying to learn how to slide feet first. I can't imagine signing someone for $10 million. And being like, now, unfortunately, there's the button issue. Well, there you go. What are we going to do?

There's no other way to put a shirt on. What are you going to do? Just slip it over your head? Yeah, it's, so he, of course, in spring training slides into a base too hard and jams his ankle and it's in a cast. Good work, Yankees. So not a great start with the new team.

That means he rehabs in Florida and he shows up to New York three weeks after the season has started. Okay. So the press is salivating to see him, right? Right. They're waiting when he comes into the clubhouse the first time for the first day of practice

and he just rushes past them and says, Oh, he is fast. He says, quote, I don't need no press now, man. And keeps going. He says he'll talk afterwards. Okay. But he doesn't talk afterwards. He just leaves.

He didn't talk before his first game but when he did finally talk before his first game, they of course ask him how it feels to play in the outfield where greats have walked. Gehrig. Yo, yeah. Mantel. Demagio, mantel.

Ruth. Well, he hasn't. He's a kid from Oakland who idolized football players. He literally doesn't give a shit. Quote, I don't care about them. I never saw Demagio or Mantel play. It's Ricky time. Oh my God.

To that, those people, they're like, excuse me, sir. I mean, no different than walking into a church and being like, ain't no Jesus. It's Ricky time. Cleaning your butt in the water. Woo. Give me some of that blood. So that's it.

He is done in the eyes of the New York press. Oh, bunch of babies too. You're supposed to come in and bow down in front of the posters and kiss Demagio's poster. He could have easily just been like, ah, it's amazing. Yeah, he's being real. He's Ricky. He's like, ah, I don't give a shit.

What's it like for them to be around me? Ha, ha, ha, ha. So the press savages it. The team starts poorly. They're not playing well and Steinbrenner. We need more buttons. Pretty quickly fires the manager. Okay.

And hires a guy named Billy Martin. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Who we've already established wanted pined for the best friendship of Ricky. Got it. I got it. Then they were forlorn for a while and now they're back together.

Daddy's back. A squeak will. Ricky then has one of the greatest offensive seasons in baseball history. Makes the All-Star team, keeps up the style. He's doing the snatch. He's now wiggling his fingers before he runs for second.

Wow. And then he adds. Gotta keep these hands loose from my legs. And then he adds the pick. The pick. He's picking his nose. So the pick came was after Ricky would hit a big home run.

So he's taking batting practice one day and he can't hit the ball out. And an assistant coach is there and he goes, here's the problem. You need to change the angle of your swing just a tiny bit. This today is known as launch angle. It's what everybody does.

It's one of the reasons the game is boring. But launch angle, just do a little uppercut on that thing. Shows Ricky. Couple of days later, Ricky's. Pounding. Pounding home runs in practice. That guy must have been like, hmm. I was so excited,

I started hitting myself in the batting helmet. I started tugging at my jersey when I started running around the bases. So he's just out of his mind excited that he is hitting home runs. Hit himself with the head pulling in his shirt. I want to get rid of the buttons. So the pulling, he starts to call the pick.

Okay. Because it transforms from some organic transformation. It goes from I'm pulling on my jersey to look at this home run I just hit. I'm picking the cashmere lint off my sweater. Wow. Right? He only did the pick when he hit a home run

that surprised even himself. Okay. Well, sorry. All home runs are probably. No, but when he hit like a really good home run. Okay. The better the home run, the more picks it got. Oh God, Jesus Christ.

What's he's got a lint roller? So he's doing that. So Ricky also loved to play cards. He'd love to take money from players, especially rookies. He enjoyed cheating. He would take from the bottom of the deck and like he was. Cool.

He's a gambler. He didn't hide it when he had a good hand. Quote. He was doing the pick. Yeah. That's a tell. Like he's got a tell for sure. I didn't write to any said this quote,

but it's one of the players quote. And he always, and he was always in the third person. Ricky's got a good hand. Oh, good hand. Ricky's not going to tell you what to do, but he would fold if he were you. And is... It's the same way he plays baseball.

He's fucking with you. Yeah, but as long as like every hand, you're like, wait, what? Oh, Ricky's got a good one. He's just always in your head. I got a pair of rigs. Once Ricky was in Las Vegas at a table when a casino rep stopped by and said,

singer Tony Bennett would like to come over and say hello to you, Ricky. And Ricky said, quote, tell Tony Bennett, Ricky would like to have him come over when Ricky has finished his lunch. Ricky had no idea who Tony Bennett was. Third personing on this level. Third personing on this level is getting a little flaggy.

It's amazing. Tony Bennett. Ah. So good. Tony Bennett was like, what did he say? What am I going to be? After he has his ham. So Ricky said that Ricky will come over

when Ricky's done eating his ham. Ah, I don't understand. Tell him Tony would really like to. Oh yeah, he doesn't know who you are. But all the songs I sing. Huh? Come on. Never heard them.

But it's me, Tony Bennett. What? Yeah. You sing your name to get people to recognize you? Tony. Why don't you sing your famous song? Which one? There's so many to choose from.

The main one. Yeah, everybody. The San Francisco one. Sweet San Fran, Tony. Okay, so you're not Tony Bennett. I left my heart in San Francisco. My name's Eugene and what I do is I walk around and I pretend to be him.

So the union reps, the union and the owners are negotiating a new contract. Okay. So player reps go to the teams and go, it's not going well. And we might have to go on strike, but we think once we go on strike, they'll fold really quick.

Okay. So stay close. Have I made the joke yet that when the players go on strike, they should go, Steer, right? No. Pretty good joke.

I'll make it later. And so the players reps are like, look to their teams, like if we go on strike, just stay close because it might immediately end. Don't go on vacation or some shit. Sure enough, it lasts one day. It's a one day strike.

To make up the mixed game, missed game, but like you'll play two games tomorrow. Steer right over. So Ricky calls the team's travel secretary the next day and he's like, is there a game in the travel secretary? He's like, yeah, it's in three hours. And Ricky's like, oh, I'm in California.

Okay. So. Ricky's in California. Can Ricky get a leader jet? So the Yankees find him $24,000 when he gets back. And Ricky makes it known he is offended and this could affect his play. Ricky might be off.

Ricky might play $24,000 worse. It's interesting because I see his perspective. His perspective is, well, that's his only power, right? That's his labor. So he's doing what the business is, which is, well, I'll withhold my labor if you're not gonna treat me.

He's literally. But they were like, don't go anywhere because this might be over a fan. I know, no, he totally fucked up. But I understand his mind as far as like. Yeah, but you pay someone $10 million, you're like, dude, just play well. Well, I don't know.

So this is in the press. Obviously it makes him look bad. But the press is probably pretty fair about it. Yeah, especially at the time. So this is a time when free agency has really taken off. So now players are really making millions of dollars and ordinary Joes are like, wait, what? Because they used to not make that much.

Right. It becomes unrelatable. Yeah, so it doesn't look good. Ricky never, Ricky also never spent meal money. Like every player when he's on the road gets meal money. Right. 60 bucks, a hundred bucks a day. But he just took it.

He's just like living in a room framed with all these. Per diem? Welcome to the hall of per diem. He would just take it and wrap it in a little rubber band and throw it in a shoebox. So after years, he has thousands of dollars in the shoebox. But when was the last time you ate? What he would do is go to his old neighborhood,

ask the kids how your grades, blah, blah, and the kids getting good grades, he'd get money too. By the way, if anyone ever asked me what my grades were and I knew money was there, you would not hear an honest answer. Sure, sure. Really good. Gears doing great, Ricky.

At the end of the day, he's just spreading, you know, he's helping out. Yeah. That season, the Yankees are rolling. Very close race until September and then Billy just fucking implodes. Billy does? Yeah, he does a bunch of bad shit this September.

He's drunk. Ends with the famous fight with Edwards and in the hotel. Right. That you can hear in the Billy episode. They don't make the playoffs. Now, Ricky has an amazing season, one of the best of all time. And yet, the New York press is still riding him.

Because he's having the best season. This is the crazy thing. He's having the best season of all time, but complaining he won't put out. Right. He's obviously playing to his top potential because he's having one of the greatest baseball seasons. But he said.

They can't get over it. Right. And they just keep writing about it. The stats disagree with whatever is happening. Which is so, like, to some extent, you're like, yeah, okay, you've like, yeah, okay, you can write about a storyline for a while. But at some point, you've got to be like, look, I mean,

he can't be $24,000 better. So Ricky comes in second in MVP voting to Don Mattingly, his teammate, and Ricky's like, yeah, okay. Don Mattingly is his teammate. Yeah, and Don Mattingly is just like an amazing hitter. So he's like, OK, that guy did it. He's not upset about that. If it was a relief pitcher, he would have lost his mind.

Right. Billy gets fired after that season. Ricky. I just need to take a few things with me when I go. My pens, my paper, some under his papers. Ricky, get in this box. Ricky, get in the box. Get in the box, Ricky.

My upstairs chilly. You're coming with me, Ricky. Ricky and Billy. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. The two guys who survived. From hitting to button. We went quail hunting. No, no, no, no, I won't touch you.

I'm not touching. We love to have fun and be kind and silly. Ricky and Billy eating upstairs. No. Chilly is Ricky. It's Ricky and Billy. OK. And maybe Billy wears a disguise and he

sticks around the facility to Ricky and Billy. Billy with a new fake identity. Call him Gilmourne. What? That's his new. Gilmourne? Yeah, you just pretend that I belong here. Just Ricky and Gilmourne.

I'm not, stop winking. I'm not going to call you Gil. Gilmourne, and I wear a weird little perm. OK, no. You'll be awake and you dig. No, I can't dig. Come on, Ricky. Billy, you got to go, man.

Ricky and Billy. Gilmourne. Look, there's whiskey over there. Gilmourne is an alcoholic. So now the teams in their division, the East Coast teams, are getting really mad at Billy. OK, Ricky. Ricky, sorry.

God damn it. It's OK. I'm here for you, baby. I'm your net. A Baltimore pitcher said, quote, people will be looking for vengeance if he keeps it up. Just baseball talk. It's baseball talk.

Crazy. It's just guys tongue in baseball. I'm going to fucking kill you. Not the Warriors. The Baltimore manager said justice was coming. What are they talking about? You're playing baseball. One of the bases might have her grenade on her

if someone's not careful. Justices, you have wronged the sport. Have you ever heard of the unwritten rules? I have, yeah. Well, time to read them. OK. Nobody's written them down. They're not there.

Yeah, but they're there. You tell them, you whisper them to each other. Well, it's hand gestures. Yeah, exactly, stuff like that. By the way, who's that guy with the weird perm he would be chilling in the dugout? That's Gil. What's his deal?

Just throw him some whiskey. He'll scurry under a bench. Hello, it is I. An umpire told Peter Gammons the umpires were tired of Billy. But the fans. Ricky. Yeah. Sorry, god damn it.

It's OK. From now on, when you say Billy, you mean Ricky. But the fans love the show he puts on. Also, hey umpires, I apologize. So what? You're like, you can't be tired of a guy. No. It's not your role.

No, it's not your role. Your role is to be unbiased and balanced. Yeah. And we hate of the players. And they're getting more mad because he's a draw. He's what the fans love. Like that even makes it worse to them. And he made time for the fans.

He he would talk to them during games. He talked to them when he's getting ready to bat. He'd carry on conversations in the outfield with the fans. That's amazing. Do you imagine like players that do that are great. It's so fun. You have a running thing with a player. It's so fucking fun.

Yeah. They would yell from due to the snatch catch. Like they want to see all the hits, right? The next season, Ricky's on fire till June. And then he pulls a hamstring. Then he came back too early. Yeah, bad. Re-enters it again.

He's out for another month. Rumors start floating, saying he could have come back, but he chose not to. Who's floating these? Then Steinbrenner. Well, so if you we haven't done a Steinbrenner episode yet, but Steinbrenner would just trash talk that his own players constantly.

Interesting. So Steinbrenner tells the press, the manager wants to trade Ricky, because the manager thought Ricky could have played through the injury. Crazy. So just totally, George never really liked Ricky. George, I always thought George was a racist,

but I'd have to look more into it, but he sounds like a really racist person. Now fans are calling talk radio to discuss if Ricky's actually hurt. This is a guy who gives everything, who is an MVP. Like they've just turned on an MVP type player. It's also, I mean, you see, it's so it's so simple. It's the press.

Exactly. It's so simple to take over the minds of the public via the press. This is them getting back at him for that first day. Yeah, right. The city's turning against him. Then the Daily News called him the most overrated player in Major League Baseball.

He's hurt. Yeah. Look at him. Look at his stats from last night. Nothing, nothing, nothing. Look at the day before. Nothing, nothing, nothing. The guy's a quitter.

And it's also not just coming from the press. Shit talking is coming from the team. Coaches, players, and the front office whispering he could have played. Crazy. So it's guys on the team who don't like him. They're using this moment, right? His assistant is this guy named Walt McCreary, quote.

I'm not a Billy Martin character. Hello, I'm Walt. No, my name is Walt McCreary. Hi, Walt. Hello. I have a bad extensive background that is not associated with the sport of baseball. Yes.

So I merely work for Ricky, and that is all I do. And I have no previous relationship, or there's no other iteration of me at all. My name, I've never been called Gil Herm. Yeah, that's not anything I've been doing at all. Go ahead. Go ahead and fire a question my way. Billy?

Yes. Can you believe? No, no, my name is the other guy. Billy, you were fired. The fire? I'm a man with a very long goatee. Take off the clown mask. What?

Who ever said anything about that? Take off the clown mask. OK, now, here you are. Hey, that's Billy. No. Hi, Billy. No. Look, Crown Royal.

No, no, no. So yeah, everyone's turned against him. What's his assistant say? You were about to read an assistant quote. Right, so this is what Walt McCurry said, quote, we were in the apartment in Jersey cooking chicken, and I look over, and he's tearing up. He's in tears.

He was talking about how nobody. Were there onions in the restaurant? He was talking about how nobody believed he was hurt. He was literally tearing up, because for weeks he'd been getting his ass ripped. The only thing, things only got worse when the team doctor told Steinbrenner Ricky could play. Crazy.

And Steinbrenner told the press. Crazy. Insane. Yeah. He's stuck, I mean, honestly. It's the worst. It's just. Medically speaking, he's full of shit.

Ricky is furious. They're saying he doesn't want to play. Hamstrings are the worst. Yeah, hamstrings are like so, yeah. Upon returning, he has a 10 game hit streak. Reporters came to talk to him, but when they did, they found Ricky had made a perimeter around his locker with athletic tape.

Wow. So he built like a murder scene for himself. That's amazing. So every day, quote, I said, don't cross this perimeter. You dog me. I don't want to talk about it. I have a couple of good days, and now you all want to come talk to me next day.

Four for four, three stolen bases, four runs scored. I yelled across the room to Donny. Donny, come tell these press people what I did. Do not cross. Y'all kept saying I was faking a jig and there's some bullcrap. So he's just fucking. He built the wall. He's doing regular.

He's playing better and better. And they're just being like, no, you get nothing. And also like that too, a guy like that, like the motivation that was through the roof. Yeah. It should be noted that, as I said, all these reporters are white. So are the national columnists, this guy is lazy

and doesn't care narrative, which they're saying, is the opposite of what they're saying about bloated, drunk idiot Lenny Dykstra. Nails. Who can do no wrong. They keep saying Ricky won't play 150 games in a season. Lenny Dykstra only did that once in his career. But here's why Lenny is the best.

Lenny is basically a walking Malibu and Coke with cocaine in it. All right. What Lenny is doing is unbelievable. You want to talk about a hamstring? Lenny Dykstra is on heroin. OK? Yeah, that's fair.

He's an amazing player. So I guess he is white. So because Ricky's injured, Harold Reynolds wins the stolen base title. He breaks Ricky's streak of seven straight seasons of winning the stolen base title. OK. And after the season, Harold Reynolds is at home

and his phone rings. I'm excited. He picks it up. No hello, no hello. The voice just says, quote, 60 bases. Man, Ricky got 60 by the all-star break and then hangs up. Hello, hello. This is Mrs. Reynolds.

This is Mrs. Reynolds who picked up the phone. Hello. That's so good. Yeah. Who gave you my number? It's like scream. What's up, everybody? This is Gareth, not Gary from The Dollar Podcast,

the show you're about to listen to. Listen, I would love to invite you to see some stand-up comedy I'm doing on the road. I'm all over this great nation of ours. Be part of the Gareth Army or the Garmy, as everyone's calling it. Everyone's calling it that. Don't look it up, but everyone's calling it that.

Monday, March 13th, I'll be in Fort Wayne, Indiana. March 14th, I'll be in Indianapolis. March 15th, Louisville, Kentucky. March 16th, Columbus, Ohio. March 17th, Dayton, Ohio. March 18th, I have two shows in Perrysburg, Ohio. March 19th, I'll be in Cleveland, Ohio. March 21st, Lexington, Kentucky.

March 22nd, I will be in St. Louis. March 23rd, I'll be in Kansas City. March 24th and 25th, I'll be in Des Moines, Iowa. March 26th, I'll be in Omaha. Then April 12th, I'm very excited to say I'll be in Tacoma, but I will be doing a crowd work show. I'll be filming it, so I really want people to come out to that.

That's April 12th, which is a Wednesday, Tacoma Comedy Club, Washington. Come on out. Then April 13th, back to regular standup at the Spokane Comedy Club. And then April 14th and April 15th, I'll be in Bozeman, Montana at Last Best Comedy. Also, Los Angeles, my home city kind of, whatever.

May 5th, Friday, I'll be at the Dynasty Typewriter in Los Angeles. Then May 18th, I'll be at Standup Live in Phoenix, Arizona. More shows coming like July 12th and July 13th, I'll be at the New York Comedy Club. One's in New York, one's in Connecticut, it's wild. Then I'll be in Pittsburgh, July 15th, and that's all for now.

Go to garethrenalds.com to get tickets and information and join me, be part of the Garmy. Everyone's calling it that, quit pushing back. Hey. I just wanted to pop in in the middle of the episode. Gareth, I want to talk to you about Harry's. What's an aggressive hey? We both shave.

We both shave our faces. I think I shave more often than you. Yeah, you shave a lot more often. That's why I was going to say these Harry's razors last six to seven years, a few times a year. That is true. So we both got shaving and other things, kit from Harry's thing. We got the razor, but we also got body wash.

I got the redwood scented, which smells like a forest. If you've ever been in a forest, a dot you have, but that's what it smells like. And then the other one's. Can I just ask an overall question? Why are you attacking me in a way? Can we not just kind of be on the same page about enjoying what we got?

I too enjoy the body. And then the other one smells like stones. It's called stone. If you've never smelled stone, this one's, the other one smells like stone. You can rub it on your body. You can come out of the shower smelling like a stone. It's hard to disprove that it smells like a stone,

but it's good body wash is what you're saying. Yeah, there's hair stuff too. Yeah, there's the texturizing. Yeah, and you don't need to put much. Yeah, you put a little bit in. I put a lot in there and you still get, you get next day hold. If you can see me right now, I've got what we call next day

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slash dollop. That's harrys.com slash dollop for a $3 trial set. Harry's. Don't be Harry. All right, back to that episode. Everything. So the Yankeeshire manager, Dallas Green, in 1989, and Ricky said, quote, I don't have to adjust him.

He has to adjust to me. Well, now that is interesting. That's not going to go well. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. So if he wants to talk to me, he could cross through the wrestling ring I've built around my locker. So Green says, I want players to come to spring training on February 23.

That'd be great if they did, because. That'd sound like spring to me. The thing is, the union's negotiated contracts, so no players have to show up until March 1. Right, spring. But he's saying, oh, it's volunteer. You can voluntarily come. OK, which they do all the time now.

Which some do, some don't. Ricky does not. He comes on the 25th. He comes two days later. He's still five days early by the rules. Yeah. Green said, quote, maybe Ricky can't read. Cool.

This guy's cool. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Right off the bat. What a great way to handle it. This idea that you're arguing with your players before you. You know what I mean? I can't even. There was all the, that seems like it's.

It's maybe similar now in a way. But now player coaches are so much more players' coaches. Totally, they're like friends. Yeah, that's how you get. Billy Martin, for instance. I mean, Granted, sure, he was maybe, you know, popping a few cold ones when he shouldn't have been, but you do get more out of them when you're like,

yeah, look, I want to help you. Steve Kerr is a great example. Yeah, there's tons of them. And he read. Yeah, there's a bunch of them. So that happens. And then, so Wade Boggs has, it has been revealed he has a mistress.

It's in all the press. And the next thing Green says is he says, maybe Ricky was having sex with Wade Boggs mistress, and that's why he didn't come on time. That's one of those things where it's like. So you have a black guy, you've said two things about him. He can't read and he's fucking a lot. But also, if you give a little more thought to it,

you'd be like, I could probably hurt him a little bit better than me. Well, maybe this woman that Wade Boggs been having an affair with, and Ricky's also having an affair with, like what buddy, what are you going for? You're like, I don't know, just stuff I sort of heard. I'm kind of spinning it back into,

not really sure how this, oh boy, I'm a roast comic. And of course, the New York press, totally on board. Totally on board. Such a dumb one, though. Well, maybe he's sleeping with Wade Boggs mistress, hmm? Maybe Ricky is sleeping with Wade Boggs. It's, they'll say whatever, they don't care. They'll say whatever to hurt Ricky.

And this is clearly just fucking crazy. And again, their race, again, you said was? White, yeah, they're white, except for one. Which we don't want to get into. There's one black woman writer who's in Connecticut. That's the only one who covers the Yankees. So it's safe to say that all races were doing this. Correct.

Thank you. No further questions. Then Ricky is mad. Why? He's been having this injured year. The press has been talking shit about him. His teammates have been, some teammates have been talking shit about him.

He showed up early. Like the teammates, the Yankees, the owner, have all been saying he's not playing when he should have. So he's mad at everybody. It's crazy that he's a Yankee. And everyone's like, this guy, he sucks, why? So he drops a new. He says to the one female black reporter

that the reason the team did not win last season was because too many players were drinking too much. Yeah, so he says they're drinking too much. That's why they didn't. And he's only talking to her, obviously. Yeah, right. The players are not happy. You mean these surly over men?

He's right. It turns out that the manager had to ban drinking on the plane. They were drinking so much. He's right, but you don't talk about internal clubhouse. Who does Wade Boggs play for now? Boston, did I say Wade Boggs? Earlier.

Oh, no, that was just the men. No, no, it's, so he, you know, their managers had shut up drinking. Like the drinking was a problem, but the problem is you're not supposed to take team stuff out in the public. So that's it. He is in June, he's traded back to the Oakland A's.

Okay. A lot of people are... Billy Martin buys a house in Oakland. You already had one, right? A lot of people in New York think they'll be much better when he's gone. This is the problem. Yeah, well, you got rid of your best player. Yeah, you got rid of the, you got rid of the problem guy.

Yeah, right. The problem guy. They are far worse. It doesn't help that the two player, two of the three players they got for Ricky were soon convicted of sex crimes against teenagers, one getting 50 years, 50 year sentence. So Ricky got traded for a kind of okay picture and two sex criminals.

Wow. Steinbrenner was like, I pulled it off. We're gonna own Sing Sing this year, boys. So Ricky now goes to an amazing A's team. They had lost the World Series the year before. The only thing they were missing is a leadoff hitter. And they get the greatest leadoff hitter of all time. Right. Is that gonna? Make them better, yeah.

Okay. Now when Ricky was feeling good, when Ricky thought he was gonna have a good day, he would come into the clubhouse and yell, it's Ricky time. Interesting. They all thought it was ridiculous and rolled their eyes and then they noticed.

Whenever Ricky came into the dugout at the beginning of the day and yelled it's Ricky time, he would have an amazing day. He would hit home runs, he would steal that crazy. He knew his body, he knew he was feeling good. Right, amazing. I've done that before sets in clubs. I do it before sex.

Yeah. And specifically yell it's Ricky time. Yeah, and that's the thing that I think is thrown Heather off so much. Yeah, she's crying a lot. She's complaining about that a lot. She cries a lot, yeah. She's a crier.

Yeah. I don't know if it's, she's okay. She's a crier. Okay, I feel like it might be a little more. No, it's her. Lucky lady. In the playoffs, they play in the playoffs and Ricky drove the Toronto team insane.

After the, after the second game. Must be confused in playing the A's if you're a Toronto team. Who are we playing today? A's? Oh God. It's a great premise. And I think, it's Gareth time.

Woo. It's a heady premise, but with 20 minutes I might get it close. Wow. So after the second game, a Toronto player told the press, quote, fuck Ricky Henderson. He's a great ball player, but fuck Ricky Henderson. When Ricky heard that, he said, quote,

if you think I'm showing you up, I'm just gonna steal more bases. He's in their heads. Right, yeah. He's embarrassing them on the field. Toronto players wanted to throw at him. So they had a team meeting and they're like, we should hit him with a pitch.

Yeah, get him on the pitch, he's exactly smart. But the guy, one of the best players on their team is a guy named Lloyd Mosby, who grew up with Ricky. And he said, yeah, that's not gonna bother Ricky. Quote, you don't understand, you can't intimidate Ricky. Especially if it's Ricky. The day before game three, Ricky said the Toronto catcher of the Toronto catcher, quote,

I don't think he can ever throw me out. If they want to win, maybe they should put someone else back there. Wow. So he's just like, I mean, his fucking mind game is incredible. Now that guy is off his game. He's just fucking mad.

The day of the game, Ricky had terrible gas. It's a very interesting thing you're highlighting. He just. It's not Ricky time. He just keeps farting in the clubhouse. The entire clubhouse reeks. One player said that they needed to fumigate it. They needed to fumigate from farts.

And then he walks up to bat for the first time and points his ass at the catcher's face and farts. He clearly ate beans or something. Wait, are you telling me? He 100% did this on purpose. He bean pounded? Absolutely. Yes, he bean pounded. He bean-packed to fart in the catchers.

He's fucking with the catcher on such a level that it is mind-boggling. He just crop dusted in his little mask. The idea. Ricky. Ricky. The doubt, it's like, he's just like, everyone in the clubhouse is like, my God.

Don't worry, it's all leading to something. What did you eat? Garlic and beans. I'm not feeling great. I think I pulled another hamstring. The A's did lose. Ricky sprained his ass and is actually out for the rest of the series. The A's did lose that game, but the next game Ricky had two home runs and they won.

Ricky had one of the greatest playoff series in baseball history. I would love to see him hit a home run and run those bases. Farting? Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Wow, look at it go and he's taking the bases. It looks like he slid, but he didn't. So the World Series was against the Giants

and it was hit by a massive earthquake before game three. When the quake hit, Ricky was in the clubhouse on the toilet and he just thought the fans. Is there like a gastroenterologist? He seemed to do that a lot. He seemed to do that a lot before game. A lot of people think it was him who caused the earthquake. We thought it was the fans getting excited

until someone came in and said, no, that's a mate. Well, they're cracking some of the walls. The stadium collapsed. They beat the Giants in four games and Ricky now had his first World Series ring. Wow. Sometimes when superstar athletes check into hotels,

they use fake names. I do that. Just a random name so people won't know who they are. I do Gil Herm. Yeah. Normal names. Ricky would check in with names like Richard Pryor, James Brown, and Luther Vantros.

Luther Vantros. I guess. OK, here's what's weird about that, is if someone were to be like, you should use a random name. I'm staying under Quentin Tarantino. So good. Luther Vantros. So after the season, Ricky's.

Yes, Mr. Brown. Yeah, I'm looking to get some beans. Is there room for root beans? Got a game today. Got a game today. Can I get a bucket of room beans? Yes, sir, Mr. Brown. So he's a free agent now and he thinks

he should be the highest paid player in Major League Baseball. Sure. Sharing out the ace offer him a four-year $12 million contract. He's the highest paid player in baseball for 48 hours. Then a pitcher gets a $16 million contract. And then more players sign higher contracts. He went from being paid the highest paid player in baseball to being the third highest paid player in his area

code after a couple of months. That's crazy. So this is when numbers are just going up potentially because of. They signed him first. Right. If he had waited. Yeah, right.

That's what I mean, though. He could have gotten the number. Like, contracts are just becoming a little more. They're blowing up, yeah. So Ricky's upset about this. He wants to be the highest paid player. So Ricky now has his sights on MVP. He would often say, quote, I cannot believe I lost the MVP

to a relief pitcher. Yeah, true. Rioters, especially in New York, pondered whether or not he would now try since he had a big contract. Let it go. They can't. They can't. He's gone.

They were wrong. His next season was his career best year. But on July 8, Ricky's world was rocked. His teammate, Jose Canseco, signed the richest contract ever. He was the first $5 million a year player. Wow. And Ricky is very angry. He's better than Jose Canseco.

Right. And he talks to the manager and the GM, and they're like, we'll make it right. We'll figure it out. We'll make it right. Now, Ricky thinks that means, well, they're going to give me more money. Right.

They're like, Jose, we're taking away some. That's not. That's what they're saying. But they're not going to do anything. Well, they were going to do something. He just didn't know what it was. But they weren't going to get more money. They were going to, yeah, we'll figure out something for you.

Yeah. Normally, you'd have a like. Want some potato chips? We got your free beans. What about that? So the A's go back to the World Series that year, but they're crushed in four games. Ricky finally wins American League and BP.

But he is now the 36th highest paid player in baseball. What a crazy year. Yeah. But that happens all the time. The guys signed the contract. It does, yeah, totally. The first contract sets the table for how the other contracts are going to be.

Yeah. And then you have that. You have players that, I mean, it's like, I don't know, I mean, kind of ego-based, where you're like, I want to be the highest paid player. And then they go, if you sign like a five-year X amount of money deal, by the time your deal's up, someone will have a far better one.

Probably the worst player, too. Yeah. So the A's refuse to renegotiate his deal after he wins MVP. Nice. He's like, let's extend it and give me more money. And they're like, no. And Ricky's angry that Konseko is the top paid player,

because Jose Konseko is actually a guy who doesn't try and doesn't give a shit about baseball. Right. Everybody in the clubhouse knows that. Right. They paid a guy who really doesn't give a shit. He's into the fame, and driving a nice car, and fucking Madonna.

Yeah, but he's doing it the right way, all natural. Right, that's right. He's also fucking packed with steroids. What? My natural, Jose? Besides his teammate, McGuire, I don't know if there's ever been, and Barry Bonds, those three, ever been three players more packed with steroids

than those three guys. Well, someone cut him open once and syringes just fell out. Yeah, I mean, him and McGuire were just juice. McGuire was purple. Yeah. The difference between. Mark McGuire looked like a varicose vein. Yeah.

The difference between McGuire and Konseko was that McGuire tried. Right, yeah, right. So Ricky cannot stop moaning to the press about the fact that he's the 36-high-paid player, and Konseko is making money. He's really focused on Konseko now. Right, right.

It's very awkward. Yeah, it's very awkward. You having a beer? Yeah, I'm having another brisky. The next season, when Ricky showed up to spring training, he immediately told reporters, I should be in the top five paid players. So he's closing in on the stolen base record.

And the A's fly in Lou Brock, because he's about to do it. Lou Brock's like, can I just not show up to these? He breaks the record on May 1, 1991, 939 stolen bases. Everyone, give it up for Ricky Henderson and Lou Brock, who's now on nobody. Hey, second guy. They stop the game and have a ceremony, and Ricky makes a speech.

Uh-oh. Uh-oh. He thanks people, lots of people. And then he ends by saying, quote, Lou Brock was the symbol of great base stealing, but today, I am the greatest of all time. I mean, I was on a six-hour flight. This is crazy bullshit.

I didn't, what? This is crazy. Lou Brock is standing right beside him. Cool. This guy now is a tone official, nothing, next to me. I turned this guy into basically a toenail. Hey, remember Lou Brock? I don't get out of here.

Get him away from me. I don't want to catch loser syndrome. This spot's for greatest people ever. Maybe we put him under the mound where we bury losers. Years later, Ricky would say, quote, after I said it, I knew I'd never live it down. Oh, yeah. Okay.

Yeah, so people talk shit about it immediately. One day the game was about to start, and Tony LaRuce today's manager doesn't know where Ricky is, and it's getting very close to starting. Sure. He was leading battle. It's places. For those of you who do theater, it's places.

Now, Ricky is at a point where he would sometimes not stretch, not practice hitting, not do anything before a game. Crazy. And so this day, he's done nothing. Not warmed up, no batting practice, nothing. And Tony LaRuce sends a guy to look for him, and the guy looks under the bathroom stalls, and there's Ricky's signature green cleats.

He's sitting on the toilet. What's his deal? And the guy tells Ricky, it's game time. You're damn right it is. And he's up first. Quote, he says, oh, shit. And you can hear his spikes against the bathroom floor, and he's running down the tunnel,

and he tells me to grab his bats. He goes straight into the dugout, straight into the batter's box, and homers. Wow. Who goes? That is the... He didn't even look at the picture. Who goes from shit to hit?

I can't even... My mind... Like he's put... Ricky Henderson. Wow. You imagined? He's too prepared for the home run, he's sat on a toilet.

Another player once came in five minutes before the game started, and Ricky was standing in the clubhouse, naked, talking to himself. Quote, Ricky's gonna have a game, Ricky's gonna have a game. He's got this. So the player's like,

I'm gonna fucking watch this. Ricky. Ricky's gonna jerk off. So Ricky keeps talking to himself. Ricky's jerking off. As he dresses. Ricky's putting on his pants. And it's about 30 seconds before the first pitch

when he says, quote, Ricky's ready to go, and he walks down the tunnel. Ricky put clothes on. Without missing a step, grabs his bat, walks up to the plate, doesn't look at the picture, and hits a home run. What the fuck?

That's crazy. I can't even... If you don't know baseball, I've never heard of a player going up to bat and not watching the picture. Right. Right. Having no clue.

You get your timing down, you see what he's doing. Right. He doesn't even look at it. No. He's just like, Ricky's gonna do this today. Yeah.

That's so crazy. 1993 is the last year of his contract, and he's now just barely in the top 40 paid players. He's still complaining. He's been complaining the whole time. Right. He never stopped complaining. Right.

He said, quote, if you're gonna pay me like Mike Gallego, I'm gonna play like Mike Gallego. Hey. I'm just living a life. Mike Gallego is his teammate. Ricky. Sorry, Mike.

But... Come on. What the aft, dude? Look, you can pay me like this shit piece of shit. I'm gonna play like him. Ricky, I'm trying. You have better skills. You were a more talented person from birth.

You were given something I wasn't. I've worked really hard. And by the way, it's pretty good money. I mean, you know what I mean? Like, I started a business with my dad. Like, things are pretty good. Oh, it's so good. Hey, Ricky, I'm over here.

Yeah, yeah. I just took a big Gallego. Oh, Ricky. Pre-game Gallego. They see Mike Gallego naked before the game. I'm gonna be so-so today. It's Gallego time. Another day and no hits.

Another day. I'm gonna take it full count. Couple full counts for Gallego. It's Gallego time. It's Gallego time. Strikeouts. It's time. Let's Gallego.

Now, the A's were so exhausted by his complaining and his threats not to play his best being paid so low that the GM threatens to suspend him. Okay. And Ricky responds by saying, I want to leave the team. So the GM immediately says he's available for trade. Good lord.

Stop. And that just makes Ricky more angry. Wow. Some of the A's players have had it too. On a plane, Lansford challenges him to a fist fight. I mean... So it's getting really... Also, they're bad now.

Right. And this is what happens when you're bad. Right, right, right. Same thing with the Yankees. They all start chirping at each other when they're bad. Right, right, right. It's just... So two Samsung's Chronicle reporters straight up called Ricky a dog.

The headline of the story was, Old Dog Up to Old Tricks. Wow. And in the article, they said the A's should include a can of Alpo in the trade. Good lord. This is a guy who just won MVP. Yeah. It's not like he's playing bad.

No, right. The stats are fine. They just don't like what he's saying. Right, right, yeah, right. And he... And it's crazy because, you know, what we just talked about, like you sign a contract and then five years later, you're not the best big player.

But if you think about it, shouldn't there also be... A sliding scale? Yeah. And they do do that. They do that a lot in sports now where they'll go... They'll figure out some... I mean, you have that all the time where, like, a player is going to threaten to leave before their contract is up because of X and X.

And it is, like, kind of a negotiating tactic. And then you go, all right, well, we're going to put, like, we're going to give you, like, a $2 million bonus, or we're going to add money on your contract, or we're going to give you an extension or whatever, you know. If you hit this many hits, you'll get more money. Yeah, right, right, right. Or there's incentivized, yeah.

So, yeah, that's definitely not happening here. If he plays good enough, he could get some Alpo. Yeah, big can of Alpo. Bay's manager, Tony Larissa, now starts publicly saying, Ricky isn't a great player because great players weren't flamboyant. Crazy. Is that your boy? Is that your boy Larissa there, Aaron?

Yeah, Aaron Defendant. Huh? No. No? Yeah? It's your best friend you said before the show. You like those championships, didn't you, buddy? Yeah.

Tony... Tony thinks Ricky is choosing not to play his best, which may have been true. I'm going to play like Gallego, like a loser. Ricky. I think this year... Our kids went to camp together. I think this year specifically, he wasn't Ricky,

but it's also like, that goes into the thing of like, that happens all the time, like players just don't like a situation and they don't play well. The difference is he was saying it. Right, yeah, right. That year, when the A's played the Yankees, Ricky hit a game-winning home run and stood at the plate watching it

till it crossed the fence. White guy reporter John Heyman, I mentioned White guy, right? I mentioned Cranky L White guy reporter. I don't know. Explain why that was wrong. He said it barely cleared the fence and he, quote, did some major hot dogging,

giving the home run signal as he jogged to first base. So John didn't like Ricky's behavior. Right. And by the way, it doesn't really necessarily, it doesn't matter at all how far the ball goes if you won the game, it's the moment. Yeah, he won the game. Like if there's ever a moment where you can celebrate,

it's when you hit a game-winning home run. I totally get the thing of like, if you do it in the fourth inning and you're not even ahead, I do think it's fucking stupid, like whatever. So this gets a lot of attention. So the next day, Ricky hits the ball really hard again and he stands staring at it, but it's a fly out.

And the Yankees are fucking furious. They're screaming at him. And then the next time he comes up, they throw behind him. That's an interesting move. That's a, that's a scared, that's a scared the batter thing. You're supposed to throw in front of him so he can hit the ball. When you throw behind him, he's,

they're essentially saying, Watch that ass. I can hurt you whenever I want. Yeah. Right. So Ricky then hits a home run. Okay. And he stands at the plate for a little bit

and then he runs. Now there's a baseline. You're supposed to run from home plate to first. It's of a straight line. Sure. And then inside of that is the, the field outside of that for several feet, there's grass and then there's the other teams dug out.

Uh huh. And so Ricky. You have to run and just, you have to run pretty far outside to get near the dugout. You got to run pretty far to get to the dugout. It's, it's on purpose. And so he, he runs real close to their dugout and the Yankees are squaring at him

and calling him a son of a bitch and telling him to get back in the baseline. Ricky quote. See, you had it coming. You're trying to get me for something because you think I'm trying to show you up. I wasn't, but okay. Now I'm going to show you up.

Now when I hit one, I'm coming to high five you before I go to first base. I mean, he ran through the tunnel and he took a shit in our toilet. Son of a bitch. I mean, they, they literally can't believe what's just happened. Well, it's also one of those things where it's like,

if you talk shit and then you get like called, like the actions call you out. I mean, live it. Live it. Yeah. And this is where Ricky's wide trot was born. So now he had the snatch. He's got the snatch.

The pick. The wide trot. The wiggling of the fingers. He's got a whole array of things that make people insane. Yeah, right. It's now a signature move. And it came from a genuine place.

Sure. He didn't like the Yankees. Right. He did not like, like how he was treated. They're yelling at him in the dugout for something he's already done. Ricky actually has a problem with celebrations, the way they're done today,

because he thinks they're contrived. They don't come from moments. That's actually my problem with that. Like I watch players and I'm like, oh, so it's wrestling. So you guys came up with something four days ago and now you're going to do a thing as opposed to, you're mad. It's in the moment.

It's a thing. It's so hard to explain to people because people never get, you're throwing like your bird. It's like, no, I don't like when a guy fought four days before, I'll hit home run and then I'll put a circle around my eye and run around the bases. You're like, it's so fucking contrived and stupid. It's wrestling.

You know, like the thing where the NFL player put a cell phone under that. I mean, it's just like, how much time did you come, how much time did you spend thinking up the dumbest fucking thing you could do? Joe Horn, when he got his cell phone, everyone was like, well, that's a bit brash, isn't it? It's also...

He activated with AT&T before this? I mean, Ricky was just doing this stuff because it happens in the moment, which I'm fine with. And I always wondered, until I read this book, I always was like, I hate it when guys do certain things. And he explains it very well. It's not organic. Right.

It's not an organic moment thing. It's something you clearly thought of way before and now you're doing it. And that's why it always seems dumb to me, because it is dumb. Right. Anyway. So, yeah, he's against contrived celebrations today.

He thinks they're bad flipping just to look cool, to manufacture cool, to get on the highlights. He considers contriving style as bad for the game, as bad for the game as the old white guys who tried to stop what he was doing. And I'm sure now there's young baseball fans who are losing their fucking mind. Talk to Ricky Henderson, buddy.

In spring training... Yeah, buddy. In a spring training game, he had a home run. And then took such a wide berth that he ran over in high five the opposing manager, Dusty Baker. Why did I give him a high five? What the hell was I doing? Do you know what Dusty Baker is?

Yeah. Came up with a high five. Oh, yeah, right, right. That's a tough one for Dusty Baker. Dusty Baker, he's like, I mean... I mean, they put it up. I gotta go for it. All right, sure.

Here you go, kid. Dusty, what are you doing? I mean, I can't... What? I mean, Dusty is... Good for him. Dusty's a super nice guy. Right.

Just a shit manager, but a really nice guy. But you didn't have to run the bases with him, Dusty. We were partying. Dusty goes the other dugout. So, the A's now as a team are just totally cooked. Like, the contract they gave Kinseko was the end. It did make all the other players mad. He stopped trying as soon as he got the money.

As the New York reporters wrote, Ricky Wood... Kinseko's the guy who actually did, and he was traded. And then a reporter, after he's traded, looks into every time... Ricky was traded. No, Kinseko. Kinseko, okay. When that reporter looks into every single time, Kinseko didn't play due to an injury. Get injured, be out for a while, and then he'd come back.

Right when he came back, Ricky would get injured and go out for the exact same amount of time. Oh, wow. So, he's just staggering. He's just so fucking mad. And he's like, this guy's a piece of shit. They're going to pay him more than I'll do what he does. Right. I mean, it's just...

I mean, you're just like, what are you doing? But he's so fucking mad. Well... He can't control his anger with that shit. Yeah, I mean, you know. But it also goes all the way back to when the team signs him for $10,000, because they know they can fuck over his mom because she's a single mother. It's a justified grievance of watching injustice.

Yeah, I get that. It's cumulative. Does that make sense? Yeah, it does. I mean, I still think there are players who would be like, whatever. Yeah, just play through it, totally. Because I, like, love to play or whatever. But also, there are a lot of players who are hybrid players and business people.

Yeah. And then if you add... If you factor into this, yeah, all that like backstory and history. He's like, I mean, he's pissed. Yeah, he's pissed. And white people get really mad at him. Plus, Kitsenko's out for most of those games because of Sorvains. He's a weird injury.

So, Ricky is traded to Toronto. He has one amazing Ricky moment in August. He's icing his foot and he falls asleep. Sure. And Ricky's probably the only baseball player on record. Ricky's going to pass out. Who got frostbite in August. What in the name of God?

He missed three games. He got frostbite? How do you pass out that hard? I don't know. This is amazing. Imagine going into the team doctor without injury. What the fuck happened? Were you on Everest?

No, I just passed out with ice on my foot. Wait, what? I bit my toe off. Do you have the ability to wake up? I thought I did. But anyway, so, part of me is blue. Blue Jays! Yay!

Toronto wins the World Series. So that's Ricky's second World Series he wins. Only person in baseball that ever be on injury report for frostbite? Yep. Okay. When the A's are traded and they were like, I want you back next season, it's a temporary trade thing. Because his contract's up and you're trading him.

Just to get. The team's getting him for just those months and then he's free agent again. So the A's sign him again. Then his world falls apart. I'm not going to go too deep into this because it's super convoluted. It's about money and family. It's crazy like people being mad, like all this shit. His younger sister accuses him of sexually assaulting her when they were teens.

And then she accused other family members of being pimps. It gets really fucking weird. It turns out Ricky's estranged dad was the whole time telling the press negative things about him. Like the dad wasn't getting money, it's a whole fucking thing. It's super complicated. I'm not going to say she wasn't, but it's a mess. What we do know is he was exonerated for defaming him or whatever. Like he won that court case, but her statute of limitations were up for the crime.

Right. So it's, here's the bad thing though. He walked into the courtroom and said it's Ricky time. Well, the strike lasted, so the teams went on strike during this. And the strike lasted a long time. And because the teams were on strike, Ricky wasn't out there every day. And it just kind of went into the ether and everyone forgot about it. About the story?

Yeah. Oh, wow. Yeah, it just vanished. Wow. You would think the press would love that because they love to attack Ricky. I also think during a dead spot of the sport, you'd be like, this is like salacious or whatever. But I do think it was, like there were lawsuits going back and forth. She's accusing the whole family of things.

The dads involved, which is super sketchy. So it's like, I think a lot of people just couldn't figure out what the fuck to make of what was happening. Right. So, yeah, I don't know. Like he was like, like they were like paying, giving her money and then she didn't get good grades at school. And he said, if you're not getting good grades, I'm not going to pay for this. Like it's all this shit. Okay.

Like he's basically paying for tons of family members to, you know, their houses and stuff, whatever. So anyway, I'm not going to, yeah, that's just fucked up and whatever. Anytime a player is accused of sex crimes, it's, they always, it's, you know, it's Kobe Bryant. It's all this shit. It's just like, It's a lot. They bring in the PR, right? Right.

So you don't know, you don't, like it's just a garbage dump at that point. Ricky's now been playing for 13 years. Okay. And that's when a lot of people retire. Sure. It's when, I mean, the guys that he played with are now retiring. And he signs in 1995 with the San Diego Padres. And this would be the beginning of seven teams in seven years.

Okay. A lot of players, like I said, retire, but he's filling a hole. There's not a lot of great leadoff hitters. Right. And Ricky quote, that's how it would go. You need a boost to get Ricky. You close to winning? Go get Ricky.

So he now realizes, cause he's getting to that age where he's thinking about the end of his career. The memorabilia, people don't like him. Uh-huh. His value as a memorabilia guy is much lower than the value of other players. Even though he restricted his signature, that's one thing Willie Mays told them, don't give away your stuff because they're going to fuck you on the salary. Right.

And Willie Mays told him, uh, don't sign shit. Like he only, This is a contract. He only signed like 12 bases in his entire career. Oh, wow. Like he just didn't. So he wanted his signature to be more valuable, but now he learns. It doesn't matter.

Oh, you're not beloved by a lot of people. Right. So you're valueless. Right. So he decides to start working on his reputation. He opens up more. The memorabilia world starts to come around. He's doing corporate events where he tells stories and makes everybody laugh.

And he calls himself Ricky does all the stuff they want. But people like the old stories of baseball because the sport has become more boring and homogenized. Not like today. Well, the characters don't exist that existed back then. Right. There aren't Ricky Henderson's and, you know, whatever else. Right.

They watch like college players now and they come out of a PR factory and it's just like, Hey, tell us what happened out there. That guy gave you the evil eye. Yeah, man. We just want to win. And we want to work for the team. It's certainly not Bryce time. Yeah.

I mean, the NBA is the opposite. The NBA is like, have at it, guys. Yeah. Everybody have fun. You don't like that guy. Tell them. And it's the most popular sport. NBA is great.

It's very obvious how you should do this. The baseball is doing the opposite. Right. They're like, what if we make the bases bigger? It's like, why don't you let them be human beings? Make the bases bigger? They made the bases bigger this year. What?

So it's easier to get to steal a base. They're connecting. It's a walkway. And home's now called an Airbnb. And there aren't guys doing snatch catches. Right. Willie Wilson quote, the game has become so boring. If you steal a base, they give you a damn taco.

Right. It's so true. Like when they steal a base, everybody in the stadium gets a taco. If you go to the taco hut tonight, it's just all that shit. The makers get 100 points. Everyone gets a jack-in-the-box taco. I don't think it 99. But that's their version of like how to bring excitement to the game.

Yeah, right. Willie says a lot about us. It does. It totally does. The way that we are now, like everything's been like kind of merged with that, with like food and stuff like that. Ricky played so long that he was a huge influence and persona to guys who are now playing alongside him.

Wow. Yeah. That's crazy. As time went by, his peers became announcers and coaches, but Ricky is still playing. Right. And people don't understand how he's still playing. They cannot fucking believe it. And stories are now flying about Ricky.

And they were called Ricky-isms. Some real, some not. His rep went from being a moody guy and unprofessional to like quirky Ricky. And part of that is because all of those old white curmudgeon guys, we're leaving the game. Right. So the guys who are keeping the unprofessional moody guy reputation afloat are now out or are slowly going out. Right, yeah.

Also, his career numbers are fucking bananas. Right. Like he's so good. That's guy has used his numbers to show he is the greatest small ball player in the history of baseball. He signed... Yeah, but he was a show poader. Ricky would use all attitude.

He signs one more time with the A's. This is the fourth time. Wow. Crazy. The manager is Art Howe. Art Howe is a very nice gentlemanly type guy. And he starts to suspect Ricky doesn't know his name. Okay.

He asked the medical staff if that's true and the medical staff keep track of it. And the medical staff realize Ricky only ever calls Art Manager. Hey, manager. Yeah, he never... They've never heard him say... How you doing? Look at the manager. There's just some people he didn't care about with names.

Yeah. And then there's other people he did. Right. Jimmy Rollins came from Oakland. Everybody knew Jimmy Rollins' dad. His name was Big Jim. Uh-huh. And when Jimmy Rollins came to the Phillies, he, of course, idolized Ricky Henderson.

Mm-hmm. So he... And he set up a thing where he was in... Ricky always worked out early. So he went to the workout room early just to be alone with Ricky. And he walked in the room and he said, hey, Ricky. And Ricky looked at him and said, hey, little James. Hmm.

So he... Is that because he loved him? It's because... Little Jim. What's important... Right. To other people is not important to Ricky Henderson. Right.

To Ricky Henderson, he doesn't care if you're art how. Right. Oh, right. Ricky Henderson cares your Big Jim's kid from Oakland. That's more important. Right. And that's actually kind of how that's better. Right.

Right? Yeah. He's an Oakland guy. Right. So Jimmy Rollins is like amazed. He's like, oh my God, Ricky Henderson is keeping track of me. Of course he is. Yeah.

He watched you... He knew what you were doing in high school. He knew what you were doing in the minors. And he knows what you're doing now. And my name is Sal. And yet... And Billy Martin. He doesn't know the guy in the locker next to him.

Right. Because he doesn't care about that guy. Right. So, yeah, whatever. It's really fascinating. It's also like... You think you're just like locking in at some point. Hey, manager.

Some people just can't remember names. I've had that, you know. But also, how many teams has he played on? How many years has he played? How many fucking people are there? Yeah. I mean, there's guys... Manager, though.

There's guys that do it. Like Brian Regan is renowned for coming. He hasn't been to a club in five years. He walks in. He knows everybody's name. Right. He walked up to me. I didn't see him in four years.

And he goes, hey, Dave. And that makes you feel special. Yeah. Whatever trick he has, whatever he can do, he can do it. Yeah. It does make you feel special. And then there are people who don't remember your name and people get all upset about it. And then there are the people who will change your name.

And they'll do this thing where they'll sort of like have this campaign to change your name just because they're kind of like a prick. And they'll just kind of like do this like subtly at first and then they'll turn it into a thing and then they'll act like they had nothing to do with it. Right. And they were just kind of like... They were just like part of the experience alongside with you and they have no idea how it started, even though they were the goddamn architect up from the beginning.

And they did it. And then they just sort of... When you recount it, they'll just sort of sit across from you and go, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And like, and you're just sitting there going like, when is this ass fuck going to realize? Like, I'm talking about him and they'll just keep going, yeah, yeah. Let me say. Yeah.

Let me say. Yeah. I know exactly where you're coming from, Garth. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. So...

The name is Hal Germer, whatever. Guillerm. Ricky isn't stealing as many bases now as he gets older and pitchers could just throw fastballs by him. He can't hit those anymore, but he's still Ricky. He's still getting on base a lot. He's still... It's not Ricky time.

He's still talking to himself at the plate. He's still laughing and having a good time in the clubhouse, but he's... Skills are diminishing. He was old. He gets on base. He could still steal on pitchers who had fast deliveries, but he was old. He failed more, right? But he takes it in stride.

He's not bitter. He's not frustrated. You can see a lot of player... I mean, Ronaldo's the greatest example. That fucking shit fit because he can't play that well anymore. That was so great. Oh, it was just incredible. You're like, no, dude, you're older.

Do this gracefully. But I've had so much Botox, you can't tell. But that year, the team goes to Cleveland. Kenny Loftin plays in Cleveland. He's the new big base stealer. He's won the base stealing title like four years in a row. And Kenny's out on the field and he starts talking shit to Ricky. He yells, quote, see that old man on the other side of the field?

There's a new sheriff in town. That dude is done. Ricky gets on base. He steals second. He steals third. He scores. He comes back to the dugout and says, quote, if Ricky sleep, let Ricky sleep. What?

Well, he's saying... Don't wake a sleeping giant. Yep. Loftin did not get on... Could have been a little more clear. Loftin, no, he's about to be clear. Loftin did not get on base that game and Ricky wasn't done. He stole 29 straight bases and finished with more stolen bases than Kenny Loftin and

won the stolen base title again. Stupid sheriff. That's like the most amazing thing of all. He's just like, oh, really? I'm old? Okay. Yeah. And by the way, there's those players who like, I'll say, like Michael Jordan in the

last day, it's like they bulletin board themselves. Yeah. Like they don't need the material to put on the bulletin board, but if you give it to them, it's like, buddy, you have really... Well, you just look like you've done, yeah. This is a horrible error. And I took that personally. Yeah.

I mean, imagine how Mad Loftin was watching him. Oh, man. Oh, my God. The A's hold a big ceremony at the end of the year and call it Ricky Henderson Day. He assumes he's resigning. He's ending it. It's Ricky Henderson Day. He gives a speech, his whole thing.

After the game, Ricky says, quote, I intend to play next year somewhere. Hopefully we'll be here. He's now 40. The Mets sign him to a two-year, $2 million contract because he gets on base all the time. Right. He's old. He can't do what he was doing, but he can still get on base. He's still better than light.

Yeah. And he can still get in their heads. Yeah, right. His reps tell the general manager to finalize the contract. He has to have a conversation with Ricky. So GM, quote, he never called me Steve. General manager? He used to call me GM.

He'd say, hey, GM, because he doesn't remember names. Ricky asked the team what the team would do if he breaks the all-time walk and all-time run record. Uh-huh. And then GM's like, we'll give you a field ceremony and we'll get you like a nice crystal from Tiffany's. Get you some Tiffany's crystal. And Ricky's like, what's that?

And he's like, it's like a glass thing. He's like, what do I want with glass? Okay. Ricky says he wants what John Madden drives, a Madden cruiser, a tour bus. I want a bus. I want a tour bus. You know, we'll get you like a punch bowl. I want a bus with cable.

GM says no. Okay. That's quite an ask. The day he actually has to physically sign the contract, Ricky stops and says he wants more money if he wins MVP. Right before they're like, all right, take pictures. Here we go. You have the GM's like, this has already been all negotiated.

We are negotiated this. Ricky, quote, well, you got a problem because now Ricky's got a black circle around his heart. And the last time Ricky had a black circle around his heart was with the Yankees and you saw how that worked out. Great energy coming from the three-aged signing of Ricky Henderson so far. Ricky's got a black circle around his heart, but he, we are, this three months we've negotiated this.

You don't just get to say that at the end. So the GM says if he wins MVP, they will renegotiate the contract and Ricky says, quote, all right, the black circle's gone and signs the paper. Jesus Christ. For a little while that season, he is so hot it looks like he might win MVP. He does win nationally comeback player of the year as a 40-year-old. He hit 315. So Ricky and Bobby Bonilla hate the Mets banter, Bobby Valentine.

And Valentine, they go to the playoffs and Valentine humiliates Ricky by taking him out when he's in the field, removing him from the game when he's in the field. And the Mets end up losing the last game in X trainings. Some players are crying. They really take it badly. When the Mets come into the clubhouse, they find Ricky and Bobby laughing and playing cards. Of course, the press gets the New York press, gets the story, and they go crazy with it.

Like all summer, crazy. Some players cared, some players didn't, like in reality, teammate Robin Ventura, quote, it really wasn't a big deal. Ricky is a great teammate. He was fun to be around. He loved playing. But Bobby Valentine could not forgive this. And I think, based on what I know about Ricky, Ricky knew this would drive Bobby Valentine

crazy. Wait. Ricky was playing cards with Bobby Valentine. No, he's playing cards with Bobby Bonilla. Oh, Bobby Bonilla. Okay. Sorry. Okay.

Right. Right. Okay. He knew it would make Valentine Nets. They both did, I'm sure. Right. Right. Right.

Valentine, and then Ricky starts at the next season, not playing well, so Valentine tells the GM to get rid of him and they release Ricky. Okay. A week later, he signs for Seattle. Jesus God. If you're wondering. Is he trying to play for every team? I mean, as long as they'll have them, they'll play.

It's crazy. If you're wondering if I'm not going to tell a John Allred story, I'm not because it's not real. It never happened. Robin Ventura made up the John Allred story. I can tell it at the end. So something to stick around for. There's actually quite a few fake Ricky stories.

There was this really fine line between him being a quirky guy in what Howard Bryant called quote, fictionalized menstrual stories that diminished him. Rictional. Yeah. And used him to reinforce the black stereotypes. Oh man. So many had spent their careers trying to shed. Wow.

So a lot of black players, you know, shake their head at what Ricky was doing, but they also knew that a lot of the blacks, a lot of the Ricky, Ricky says Ricky stuff is fictionalized and mostly the people telling those stories were white. Do you hear what Ricky did? So you know, it's one of those subtle racism things or maybe not that subtle. So the stories like that. There's so many versions. It's just the embarrassment of riches.

The stories like that made it harder for black players to have careers post playing like managers, GMs, like so they can't, they're not taken as seriously because they're, you know, people tended to over embellish is talking the third person and a lot of black players told Ricky stories, but they did not use the third person because Ricky often didn't use third person. Right. He just talked about himself. He did do it a lot when he was fired up, when he came in the dugout and said it's Ricky

time when he's trying to talk to himself about he did times like that he's naked. So he did do it at certain moments, but not all the time. He wrote a book in 1992 with a writer, John Shea, and John Shea was immediately thrown off because he never spoke in the third person the whole time they were doing it. Yeah, right. And stories changed. It was like telephone. If you told the Ricky story, then they would go through the, and then all of a sudden he's

doing it in third person. So anyway, in 2002, Ricky is 43 and the Red Sox call. They were offering him a $330,000 minor league contract, which means he has to go to spring training and beat out other players to get on the team. Which you would think a guy at this level with this career would be like, no, but I'm assuming you're going to say that he does. Of course he does. God damn me.

You imagine like I'm competing against Ricky Henderson. He's 43. 43. And he did. Wow. The last day he beats out the last player and then immediately starts complaining about the contract. What are you going to do if I win MVP?

Ricky, you're 43. I've got a black circle around my heart. Ricky, you're 43. Your wrist is popping from signing. The Red Sox cannot believe what's happening. He tells the media he deserves more. What is going, I mean, this is amazing. He signed the deal, but after he signed the deal, he wanted to call a press conference

to complain about it and the team PR guy had to be like, this is going to make you look so bad. They'll get you. You won't be on the team. This is bullshit. He was talked out of it. Ricky just kept saying all year long, quote, man, these guys aren't paying me. No, they're not 43 near the end of the year, the Red Sox announced they were going to have

a Ricky Henderson day to celebrate his career. How much do I get for that? It turns out he'd actually negotiated a Ricky Henderson day when he was making all of that shit about the condom. That's what they agreed to because it works for everybody. It's like great. I want a bobblehead. He wants a bobblehead.

I want a mouse pad with my face on it. Well, he also negotiated a car. They would give him a car. Now he was walking one day with a couple of guys in front of us and he saw the main owner's car, John Henry, that's some kind of Mercedes and he's like, I want that. And they said, you want one like that? And he goes, no, I want his car. Ricky, I don't want to walk you through how this all sort of works and how we incentivize

deals. So, okay, you negotiated the deal. You understand that you signed that deal. And you don't get to kind of walk around with us like we're sugar daddies and point at things that you want. Now, if that was the arrangement, you don't get to ask for the actual car you're sitting in front of you. It's not a floor model.

So we took a walk with Ricky and he would like your, can we give Ricky Henderson your car? So there's two versions of the story and I'll read one. But they're all both kind of the same thing. He goes the day of the Ricky day, he comes to the stadium and in the parking lot, in the players parking lot, there's a brand new Ford Thunderbird. And Ricky says, quote, whose piece of shit is that? And the lot attendant tells them it's the gift car they're giving him.

And Ricky says, quote, okay, I think I'll give it to one of my daughters. Anyway, there's a huge crowd, Ricky Henderson day. And just like Darren Oakland's Ricky Henderson day, he says he's not quitting baseball. How? Everyone's like, please retire. Does anyone want to trade cars? Quote, I think that I want to play one more year. I can still help a team.

But after Boston, no MLB team calls for Ricky, right? But he's not done. What? In 2003, he went back to the minor leagues in Newark, New Jersey, and Ricky made the All-Star team. In the minors. Yeah. Yeah.

He agreed to play in the All-Star game because he was told it was in Nashville, which was like great food, great town. But then he found out it was in Nashua, New Hampshire, so he didn't show up to the All-Star game. Not great food, not great town. He didn't show up to the All-Star game. Yeah. I should have let him finish when he said Nash.

Then the LA Dodgers called. He was back in the Major League Baseball, 55 years old. His final at bat, he was hit by a pitch and scored. He started the next season back in Newark. It's a bodybunt. So he's in Newark for a while, and then he switches to a San Diego independent team. Surf Dogs. Surf Dogs.

Yeah. I think he said Surf Dogs. Surf Dogs. The Surf Dogs. Yeah. It's a weird logo. We're like pool noodles. It's a bad logo.

We're the Surf Dogs. It's a surfboard with a penis. Looks like we're fishing. The next year, he was. The shark's got my dog. The next year, he was still saying he could play in Major League Baseball. And on and on, he finally gave in and retired on July 13th, 2007. Can I have a car?

Ricky Anderson has the most stolen bases, the most run scored, most games led off of the home run, and most walks. He was elected to the Hall of Fame the first year he was eligible. And boy, were people excited because Ricky had to give a speech. Oh boy. And he's concerned about the speech. Okay. Oh, right.

Yeah, of course. So Ricky went back to school. Wow. He went back to community college, and an entire class helped Ricky work on his Hall of Fame speech every day. Wow. What the hell was that class originally supposed to be? I'm just...

Welcome to Ricky Henderson's Hall of Fame speech. I'll be your teacher. I mean, the professor was an ex Major League ball player, but I think it was probably... I'm majoring in Ricky Henderson's Hall of Fame speech. It was probably a speech class. Have you done a speech class? Like, you give a speech every day. I clearly have.

Yeah, you haven't. So when he gave his Hall of Fame speech, everyone was expecting ridiculous, right? Him talking about himself in the third person, maybe calling himself the greatest of all time like he had done, but he didn't. He was humble. It was a great speech, and the crowd gave him a standing ovation. Is it safe to say that day he stole some hearts? No.

You're reaching across the table. You shouldn't be. I just want to hold your finger for this. You shouldn't be. Give me one of your fingers. Gil? I need you to leave. Give me...

Here's some whiskey. Look, all Gil's asking for is one of Ricky's cut-off appendages. What you really want is... Can you get me a Ricky finger? We've done this. All you want is whiskey. I give you whiskey, you go away. You have a problem.

The thing I can't have is Ricky's finger. You can't have Ricky's finger. Give me the pinky. No. I want a toe. No, Ricky... Brush his pubes and give him a brush. Ricky...

Give me a comb of his pubes. I'm not giving you pubes. Does he have a mole? No, what the fuck? Get a mole for me. Please. Earwax? No.

Can he spit in my mouth? No. Have him sneeze in my hands? No. Can I sniff his bottom like we're two dogs at the park? Ricky has COVID. Gil has COVID. Gil wants Ricky's COVID.

So they give him a standing ovation, but Ricky knew the standing ovation was due to low expectations and because a lot of people thought he was dumb. A little while later, the A's retired his number, 24, and there he gave the speech that they all wanted. Quote, I'd like to share a little Rickyism with you. Ricky has tears in his eyes. Ricky has love in his heart for you. Ricky is so very, very humble and the crowd went nuts.

Ricky is so very, very humble is quite a sentence. Ricky Henderson has never officially filed his retirement papers with Major League Baseball. What is he? 65? It's not too late. He could probably go out there and get on base at his age. That would be amazing. I probably couldn't.

Well, that's what you think about Jordan too, you're like, Jordan could probably... He could go for a while. That's crazy. I had no idea. Oh, no, his story is just wild and it's wild from the perspective of the racism that is just throughout the whole story. Yeah, it's almost death by a thousand cuts with it in some ways where it's just like, it's rampant, it's subtle, it's...

And he was warned early on, he was good friends with Billy Mays and Billy Mays would be like, fuck these guys, they fucked me, they'll fuck you, get what you can. Don't give those parts of yourself up. You know. It's very cool. Yeah, it's fun. All that, all works in sports. So great book, a lot of different sources.

It's so funny going through the sources, you're just like, John Heyman after he retired wrote this big story and it was like, he's a great player, but he'll always remember for the bullshit and then listen to a bunch of bullshit and you're like, dude, some of those things aren't real. Yeah. You're a fucking sports reporter. Right. You fucking know this shit isn't real.

I love this dude. You know. And you're writing it up. John Heyman. John Heyman. That kind of shit, it's just like, yeah, we get it, white guy, you're mad. Are you talking about you or they don't know you? Me.

Yeah, we're talking about me there. It sounds like your Twitter bio. So the book is a great book. It is by Howard Bryant and it's called Ricky. I really recommend reading it. It's really good. But then there's other sources which I'm not going to, but I'll put them up. What is this story you were saying, the one that you teased?

So John Alarood, he goes to the Mariners in Seattle and John Alarood is on the team. I'm going to look it up just in case I get any parts of it wrong. So you guys see John Alarood. John Alarood had had a brain aneurysm and so he wore a helmet in the field. So up at the plate and also in the field, just in case he ever got hit. So he goes up to John Alarood and he's like, oh man, I knew a guy, Ricky knew a guy, Ricky knew a guy who wore a batting helmet on the Mets and he's like, yeah, that's me, Ricky. We called him batting helmet.

So that's the famous John Alarood story, not real made up by Robin Ventura as a fake Ricky story. But Robin Ventura made it up knowing he wasn't trying to convince people, he was just like fucking around. Yeah, right. Okay, right. But they would stick around. Because it's interesting to see the guys who you think would hate him, Buck Schollwater,

like a really rigid, but Buck Schollwater fucking loved Rick Andersen's style. He's an old school, unwritten rules guy, but he's like, no, that guy was organic. That guy wasn't bringing the unwritten rules. He was using the game to fuck with you, which isn't the same thing. So I don't know. It's very... Well, the unwritten rules is really quite a... It really is like such a...

It's so easy, you know. It's like... Yeah. You know. Gentlemen's rules. And like I said, it's super complicated, the unwritten rule thing. And make a rule. That's a problem that you can adjust rules, so make a rule.

You're seeing it swinging the other way now, and someone's going to get hurt, because as much as people don't want emotions to come into these things, if you're showing up a guy or hitting a homerun when you're up by 10 to 1 in the ninth inning, at some point some guy's going to throw at your fucking head. That's one of the reasons it exists, not to do, and people are always like, well, you can't celebrate. It doesn't matter if you think someone can celebrate. Mad guy on the mound will hit you with a fucking ball.

You can't even fart in a catcher's mouth in today's game. Like that now is like, that's just like totally... You know what I mean? Like people think that's gross now. Back in Ricky's day, that was like, you know, just drag and tail on a guy. Yeah, again, you can't fart. That's racism, that you can't fart in people's mouths. But yeah, again, all the unwritten rule stuff comes down to racism.

But like, you know, Ricky's take is, I think, the best take on it. Well, we'd like to invite Ricky on The Past Times, our other podcast, Ricky, if you have any interest. He wants $130,000. Well, we'll just, we're, look, let's talk, let's talk about it. As we're about, all right, all right, Ricky, are you rolling on your end? I want a motorcycle. All right, Ricky, we like have...

He's so fictionalized that finding out what's true and what isn't. Yeah, it's his own. Yeah, in a way, that's kind of a fun game in a way, you know, it's like... I mean, that's, it's like that with a lot of people on the dollop. You have to go through and figure out what's real and what isn't. Like a lot of your lore. Yeah. You sleep on your eyes and ears.

That's all true, though. You say it's Ricky time before you fornicate. That's true. What are the, you know... Yeah. Is it true there's two of you? Yeah, all the stuff I say. Do you shift around like you're sitting on Hussein from house to house?

Yeah. A lot of people think that that's true. Yeah. Yeah. True, you have a 11th finger. Are you hooked up to breast pumps when you get home? Yeah. Do you sleep in Matrix goo?

Yeah. You know, there's a lot of that stuff. The only thing I want to have is a Snapple. We don't bring that, that's not a bit for the, that's a Patreon bit, my friend. We're not going to do that. No, thank you. And Snapple's a delicious beverage. Quiet.

Aaron, cut it. Cut it. Cut it. Cut it now. Cut it now. Cut it. Cut it. The dollop is brought to you in part by Hello Fresh.

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What did you and your mommy cook last? We had a ricotta flatbread and then a veggie shepherd's pie. So me and your mom, we made balsamic tomato and herb chicken over a little bit of spaghetti. I don't think you did. I'll tell you what, your mom, your mom loved that. She's pescatarian. Get up to 20 free meals with purchase plus free shipping on your first box at hellofresh.ca slash dollop20 with code dollop20.

That's 20 free meals with purchase plus free shipping on your first box at hellofresh.ca slash dollop20 with code dollop20. What's up, everybody? This is Gareth, not Gary from The Dollop Podcast. The show you're about to listen to. Listen, I would love to invite you to see some stand-up comedy I'm doing on the road. I'm all over this great nation of ours. Be part of the Gareth Army or the Garmy, as everyone's calling it.

Everyone's calling it that. Don't look it up, but everyone's calling it that. Monday, March 13th, I'll be in Fort Wayne, Indiana. March 14th, I'll be in Indianapolis. March 15th, Louisville, Kentucky. March 16th, Columbus, Ohio. March 17th, Dayton, Ohio. March 18th, I have two shows in Perrysburg, Ohio.

March 19th, I'll be in Cleveland, Ohio. March 21st, Lexington, Kentucky. March 22nd, I will be in St. Louis. March 23rd, I'll be in Kansas City. March 24th and 25th, I'll be in Des Moines, Iowa. March 26th, I'll be in Omaha. Then April 12th, I'm very excited to say I'll be in Tacoma, but I will be doing a crowdwork show.

I'll be filming it, so I really want people to come out to that. It's April 12th, which is a Wednesday, Tacoma Comedy Club, Washington. Come on out. Then April 13th, back to regular standup at the Spokane Comedy Club. And then April 14th and April 15th, I'll be in Bozeman, Montana at Last Best Comedy. Also Los Angeles, my home city, kind of, whatever. May 5th, Friday, I'll be at the Dynasty Typewriter in Los Angeles. Then May 18th, I'll be at Standup Live in Phoenix, Arizona.

More shows coming, like July 12th and July 13th. I'll be at the New York Comedy Club. One's in New York. One's in Connecticut. It's wild. Then I'll be in Pittsburgh, July 15th. And that's all for now. Go to garethrenalds.com to get tickets and information.

And join me. Be part of the Garmy. Everyone's calling it that. Back.