The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 6 - The Tank Chase
Episode Date: June 2, 2014Dave and Gareth Reynolds discuss the tragic life that lead up to the greatest police chase in American historyTour DatesSources Dollop MerchPatreon...
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Really? Welcome to another episode of the dollop. It's weird when a dog jumps on you
at the start of the podcast. It's normal for me. We have a good relationship don't
be jealous. We have a great relationship.
People enjoyed Hugh Glass. The Hugh Glass story. How could they not? I keep getting
tickle updates from different tickling. There's a tickler loose in Boston who's
tickling people while he breaks into people's houses and he tickles them
while they sleep. Jesus so many better things to do once in. The guy who okay
the guy who the tickling thing all traced back to. Yeah the weird right. Is now
suing the journalist. The bisexual journalist. The bisexual journalist or
homojournalist whatever he calls him. Yeah. And and he's suing him and he suit
him for also putting up that gross photo that weird creepy photograph that we use
that I showed you. Yeah. So I removed that from our site just in case I just
didn't want to. Oh jeez. I just didn't want to deal with any weird lawsuit. Even though
he got he doesn't that's the that's the picture the FBI put out when they
arrested him. Yeah. So he doesn't but I also don't want to deal with what I got
a higher lawyer. I don't know what his problem is. It's a good looking picture.
That's a headshot. I should send that as my headshot. That should be headshot. Yeah.
We really I mean it's it's not too late. We really should do the shirtless
pic soon. Oh fuck yeah. I'll maybe do it next week. Yeah and then we I'll let you.
We have to do that. Have at it. Have at it. I can wear a sign that says not at all
gay. And we know and I know a guy. Ash is a guy who used to be on a radio
station down there in Australia and he lives here mostly now and he was one of
the tickle guys. Yeah. Maybe at some point we could have Ash on and talk to him.
Yes. Yeah. All right. I already told you that last week didn't I. Did I do that on
Mike. No I don't think you said we'd have him on. So there's new information. Yep.
It's a new bit. So this week did you see my post about what this one's about. No.
The greatest police chase in US history. Okay. Do you have any idea what that might
be. No. You don't. No. The greatest police. I mean well okay to come to mind. Okay. I know
it's not going to be OJ. Okay. Why do you why do you know that. Because you'd say it's
the OJ police chase. That's what we're going to talk about. The whole murdering thing.
Murdering you people is not all that funny. I mean it's a little funny. Or there was the
guy in San Diego who stole the tank. Okay. Is that who we're talking about. Yeah. Oh
wow. So I was like what goes in like I was I saw a little clip of it and I was like okay
fuck why did that guy like what goes into. Yeah. A guy taking a tank. A guy just doesn't
pull up and go you know what I'm going to take a tank. You know what I'm going to steal
a bike. Now fucking I'm going to get a tank. So there's always. So you know something.
Shit had to be. Yes. Building to a tank seizure. Yeah. Yeah. Just grab it. You're climbing
the tank meltdown. I know it's so funny. I thought I thought I would be clever by by
not telling people but everyone is going to say cartridge in the tank. But I don't really
know. I remember it live. See I just remember it vaguely. I don't remember any back story.
It was so fucking crazy to watch a guy just driving. You weren't here when that was I
in college in no 95. So I was I was up and I was doing comedy up in San Francisco. But
I it was on TV. Yeah. Yeah. It was like six o'clock. So that's when you're. Was live
on TV. Well yeah they cut in and showed it live with the helicopters and all that. Or
just the cars you know showing it as the tank went by. But I remember watching just this
tank just destroying shit. And I remember I remember them taking the guy out of the tank
like I remember the whole thing like it's very vivid because it was a guy in a tank.
Yeah. Destroying a city. Yeah. Okay. And everybody seems to know about it because we went through
a period in America where those craziest drives. Biggest accident. Wildest chasers of all
time. Yeah. Those things were huge for a while. And then I guess we got tired. They're not
still on right. I haven't seen them. It might have been when a man stole a tank that we
were like are we fueling the fire of this. Who's got the craziest thing. Jesus Christ.
The man is a tank. Well another guy in Colorado fitted like outfitted a bulldozer and went
on a bulldozer run. But like but like did it up like like at the end of Animal House
like he tricked out a bulldozer and went for a fucking run. Where are you going on.
Garage. Again why. D.D. is getting in the dozer. What. Shut up. Your name's Larry. My name
is D.D. All right. So Sean Nelson is the tank guy. Admiral Nelson. Born August 21st 1959.
So he's on the cusp of Virgo and Leo. Wow. What does that mean about him Dave. I don't
know. I don't even know if he is on the cusp but it sounds great. He grew up in Claremont
which is north San Diego. And he went to after so you know his dad was in the military and
San Diego is like seeing the seeds. People who don't know San Diego is a huge military
town. Yes. There's what's the big one. What's the big one. The big the US Army. That's
the army. Those guys. The name's tricky. I don't even know what the big but my Pendleton
that's Pendleton. Yeah. So he he signed up for signs up for the military. Okay. Goes
to Fort Knox Kentucky and trains as a tank crew member. Oh boy. So he's tank knowledgeable.
Yes. He was in the army from seventy eight to eighty which is a brief stint just on
the cusp of cancer. Usually don't you have to go. You should think if you're in the army
you got to go more than two. Isn't it. The whole thing that they just fuck you. I don't
think it's a to an out situation. Yeah. You're like all right boys. I'm not signing up again.
I didn't like it. So he was part of a tank battalion station in Germany. He served as
army battalion was discharged. The rank of private in nineteen eighty. His career was
marred by multifaceted discipline disciplinary and problems. So what we're dealing with is
a man who doesn't handle discipline. He doesn't handle things well and he's in the army. He's
told no that isn't enough. You know what you're not good at this stuff but you should get
to know tanks. Listen now that we've told you how to operate tanks get out of here and
go back to regular society. You understand me man. All right. So he leaves. He leaves
the army and he gets a job on a fishing boat in Panama. Whoa. This shit happens. Yeah.
How does that happen. I mean I guess he goes back to San Diego and San Diego is like OK
so at that time San Diego things aren't going well. Right. They'll hold everything's fucking
shutting down and the plants are shutting down and moving elsewhere. You know and then
the cold the cold war has ended. Right. So all of the all of the money we were spending
on fake stuff to fight the fake people. The real people to fight the real to fight their
fake stuff is all being shut down. OK. Gotcha. So the real the only thing that remains are
the real issues. Right. And I wish my thing. There we go. Right. So he he goes there and
then he comes back from Panama and he starts a plumbing company. So far very bizarre.
All shit. This is all shit that guys do. Just don't know what to do. True. No one no one
is like man I'm a plumber. Boy I just want to work in shit. I just want dirty pipes.
I just want people to come to me with their enormous shit problems. That's exactly exactly
it. So he got a good reputation. He had a good plumbing company. So things are going
fine. All right. Claremont fine is a relative term. Well Claremont is has a bit of a meth
problem because it's well San Diego is one of the it's like where meth came ashore in
the States because you know the government the army gave our pilots and other people
meth. Is that where it all started. Yeah. The Japanese the Japanese kamikaze's were all
on meth. Why do you think they were doing that? You think they were like I love the
emperor. They were like I'm going to fly into this thing and then I'm going to go home.
That's what I've been led to believe. It was really just they couldn't itch their whole
bodies at once. Fuck it. Yeah. So dudes who were like on long bombing runs they'd be like
you know what you need to stay awake for your little yeah. Right there you go. Now why don't
you fly that plane into that boat. That's that sound pretty good right. So all those
people come back from World War two you know met brought back math and then San Diego was
like any any military logistical place was where meth hit ground and just took root.
So funny how we don't talk about that enough. No it is strange. Yeah. So so the economy
is collapsing because of the end of the Cold War. So then meth just takes off in this place
and it's and it's like it's like the it's where all the like tiny houses are like the
1950s houses that aren't that big right that people who have money don't want to live in
so he's in one of those communities just kind of Claremont takes root. Okay. Fucking sweet
sweet meth. Yeah. So now he's that is he doubt he's dabbling in meth. He is definitely dabbling
in meth. He's enjoying the math. So his kid to the point that his brother says that he
in in in like eighty nine eighty eight is now addicted to math. I thought I thought his
brother is going to says where he might steal a tank. He's doing so much math. I feel like
he just might take a fucking tank. I don't know. In 1990 he has a motorcycle accident.
All right. Which I assume has to do with the math. I think it's fair to think that meth's
involved. I feel like I feel like motorcycles and mess. It's a bad combo. Let me ask you
this. Yes. Did he drive his motorcycle into a boat. So he's hospitalized for neck and
back injuries and he gets into a fight with a security guard in the emergency room. Well
those guards are full of shit. I mean who hasn't been in a position where you want to kick
one of their asses because he was saying that they were forcing him to get treated without
his consent. Which is classic math. I'm fine. Sir. Your spine is sticking out of your side.
I am fine. Sir. Going home. Sir. Sir. Going home. You're dragging your spine like a tail
sir. Sir. So he sued. He ended up suing the hospital for one point six million. A good
number two for the amount of damage. Right. Right. That emotional stress is not easy.
It's fucking hard. It's tough. He cited negligence, assault, battery and false imprisonment.
Well. False imprisonment is like petty. It's a hospital. That's kind of the fucking ruse.
That's the rub here. They're like stay. If everybody will go from a hospital in a hospital
after an accident I was like I'm suing you. Yeah. Or just was like I want to leave. How
did you keep me here. Well unfortunately his brain's half out but we got to let him roll.
I'm as key as Charlie. The case was dismissed. On what grounds? In the hospital counter sued
for six thousand six hundred in medical fees. A reasonable. A reasonable. A reasonable number.
Okay. A year one point six million. Yeah. That's gone. But we just want the six grand. Is that.
Well I'm suing you for six hundred grand. So his wife files for divorce in 1990 which
a year later which is a bummer. That's a bummer. But marriage is hard. It's hard. It's just
in general. Yeah. But when someone's on meth. Yes. It's more difficult. Well and fighting
people and you know saying I'm going to sue this hospital. All this stuff. And if like
if you're trying to talk you're like look I think there's some problems with our marriage.
Let's maybe go to a counselor and talk about stuff. And then the guy's like well there's
microphones in the beef in the freezer. It's hard to have that conversation. Which is something
that happened to my sister. She had this girl that we grew up with. She moved in with her
when they were in college and came home one day and the girl had taken all of their meat
out of the freezer and it had been and my sister like stand over to boyfriend so she
came home and this meat had been on the floor for like two days. And it's just like right.
And she's like what are you doing. She goes looking for the microphones. It's always the
microphone. Really. Yeah. Microphones. Microphones. The holes in the wall. Yeah holes in the wall.
That's what she did. She put holes in the wall. We might need to get some patch. And
you know what they're not really finding the microphones. They know who baffles me. What
would happen if they did find one. If they found a fucking microphone. Oh fuck me. That's
a movie. You know all the NSA stuff now. It can just blow their mind. Oh by the way they
can turn on your phones and listen to you. Yeah. Yeah that's actually real. But the problem
is it's not this tangible wire in a wall. Right. Right. It's just the phone. It's just
the phone. Such a fucker. All right. So sadly both of his parents died of cancer in 1992.
Oh boy. So he got a he got a triple it. He gets his wife divorced him. Yeah. He's in
pain from all the stuff and then his parents his parents go. He's got one brother left.
That's it. So he's just hanging with the one bro. Oh boy. This next door neighbor Karen
is a dabbler in math. Oh she's a dabbler. Yeah. And she had one of these houses where
people would get out of jail and then they would all go to her house. It's like a quarter
way house to me. But it wasn't like a place where to like rehab. It was a place to like
find a guy who has a gun. Like it was the kind of place that you go to if you're like
hey I want to go right back to jail. Yeah. How's the quickest way to do that. Go to Karen's
get something and then leave. So she had the house where all the criminals went. Right.
So he's next door so he's getting more and more into sweet sweet math. That's a horrible
circumstance for him to just be next door. You know what but it's convenience. It is
if you want to keep doing math which you shouldn't want. You shouldn't want to do. But it's
fun. Interesting enough Karen got her house when her mom died and her mom was a hoarder.
And so the reason Karen started doing math was to clean clean. Shut up really. Oh my
god I was doing a bit. Everybody starts doing math like man I got to you know I got this
plumbing job. I can do it 20 hours. Like everyone's got a reason. There's a big bowling
tournament coming up. I'm just going to hit some strikes. You know I got to work on my
car. I got to work on my car. I'm going to go fly a plane and do a boat. So I'm just
working on that a lot. So sometimes she would see Sean and his friends wrestle in the backyard.
I'm sorry. I said sometimes sometimes she would see Sean and his friends wrestle in
the backyard and sometimes they'd be so plowed that they would wrestle and then they'd wake
up in mid combat. Well they would like would look like two guys fell asleep cuddling in
the backyard like it would be like she said she would go over there to be like two dudes
wrapped around each other because they both they're tuckered out. This is when I was like
I know so little about math that it's insane. Yeah. So this is his buddy Chris who this
happened during one of the wrestling sessions. He got into a physical wrestling match and
I ended up breaking his back. He's on the back. Is he back? I heard something crunched.
I let go of him. He laid in the ground and told me to call a paramedic and he told me
I don't know what just was said. I just need to go over a couple of things. Yeah. Go ahead.
He said broke his back right. So they were wrestling. There's a couple of guys wrestling
on math. Yeah. And then one guy broke the other guy's back. So then a guy's back's broken.
Yeah. Terrible news. He's laying there. Yeah. And then he basically that guy took off. The
guy who broke the back. Yeah. And then Karen saw Sean just laying there because he couldn't
get up because his back was back broken. Right. And then she came over and called 911. Oh
my God. If all right. And at this point I'm like maybe Obamacare isn't such a good idea.
Maybe. Maybe what we need to do here is just look it just it's going to happen anyway. Can
we just film it and put it on TV. Because meth wrestling. Oh my God. I know. Bump fights
is yeah. Bump fights to me feels that feels morally staged and weird. Yeah. That is worse.
But meth wrestling. But this is people who just I like to wrestle. Yeah. They love math
and apparently do it really hard. Why not just give them a little bit of booty to go
home with at the end of it. If they win. Yeah. I'm totally on your side. And then Karen
comes in. She's the card girl and the and the cleanup girl. Yeah. She calls 911. A
lot of teeth on those mats. A lot of teeth are going to be falling out in the meth wrestling
line. The bell will ring and two teeth will just drop out of a guy's mouth. I got to
admit other than my my sister's friend I know so little about math. So when I started reading
the story I was like this is fucking insane because what they do whether on meth is crazy.
It's not just like hang out like heroin you do heroin and then you lay around and you
find it till you can find more heroin. Yeah. Yeah. OK. So so he continued with his meth
addiction. I guess he healed from the broken back and he was still a plumber. He's still
working as a plumber. Right. So then he decides to get into gold. Not a meth decision. No.
OK. Now what I say go into gold. You mean jump into a big pool of coins like Scrooge
McDuck. That's so much better. I'm saying that he found a piece of gold in his backyard.
OK. All right. All right. And then he decided that was the best place to mine for it. Oh
man. That's like what you do when you're 11. Right. You like in the yard you're like
there's all this gold. Your mom's like I got to re-sod this. I need more. I'm making
a mind. I need more. Eureka mama. So he digs a 17 foot hole. Oh boy. Oh boy. Oh boy. I mean
that's big. That's a big hole. It is a big hole. It's a big hole. It's a really big hole.
So. So it's like a real OK. He's got sub pumps and he's using chemicals to find the gold.
You know like you. I'm sure he's drinking some chemicals every now and then. Some for
the doctor. As you're supposed to do. He made a he made a sluice with Dr. Seuss. You know
what a sluice is. He had the sluice with the news. No. All right. So let me explain mining
to you. So there are residual alluvial and bench types of deposits mineral deposits.
And bench is when the it reaches the stream. You know and then you see all the miners getting
it out of the stream. All right. Alluvial is when the gold's been washed away. So it's
like been broken away from the load. And then you try to you sift through you try to find
it. Sure. And then bench is when you're on math is where it's the mother load. Right.
OK. So. So he. I mean. We're betting that he thought he had a bench. OK. So he thinks
he has the. I just want to make sure it was not. He thinks he's got the big one. The one
the guy goes it's the mother. Yeah. That's what he's got. So he made. So he made us.
So he made a sluice box. Which is the thing that it's got like a little sort of ruffles
on the bottom to separate the gold from the OK. From the dirt or the other little rock
you see in like you know old mining. Yeah. Traps because the gold particles are heavier
so it traps them as the water washes over it. It's it's the kind of thing you use when
you when you're shoveling gold out of a mine. All right. Right. So he turned his jacuzzi
into a sluice. White trash hall of fame. You're not noticed. I turned my jacuzzi into a gold
search and machine. Oh wow. Go and turn on the bubbles. Turn on the jet. Hey we can still
take a dip in it. Oh yeah. Smoking method like muddy jacuzzi like bubbling.
Fucking in there. Fucking in there. Yeah. Hold on. Is that gold. No that's your clip.
So yeah. I would I would love to have a look at it. I'd love this guy needs his own museum.
Well I mean it seems like a weird idea unless you're tweaking and then it's a perfect idea
like it all makes sense. No it's a Eureka. At some point he shouted the jacuzzi alone.
So tweaking is not something that you do alone. Tweaking isn't. Yeah it's apparently. You
have to have a partner. Well you like to bring in people to stuff. Usually you invite people
over and you all tweak together or whatever. Sure you do. And but since and since Claremont
is a really depressed place and there's always people around. It's a lot of it's perfect
for inviting friends over. Yeah for a good tweak. So I feel like something's about to
happen. No I mean I don't want to say that. We went forward on the thing. OK. So he starts
inviting people over and to help with the mine. So OK go ahead. Let me stop you right
there if I made it. So he's inviting other meth addicts who undoubtedly need money to
help him find the gold in his backyard under what we'll call the honor system. OK so it's
just one of those. I trust you man. Well it looks like a real mine. It he had he had
it isn't like a fucking hole in the ground. He has no it's huge. If you look down it the
sides are well crafted. You know these are the metal or wood. Besides there's a pulley
yeah to pull up the stuff. It looks like a professional mine because I think that's what
tweakers do. Like I don't think they're like I'm going to dig a hole. Yeah they're fucking
worker. So right and he's got skills right. He's a plumber he built. Yeah yeah so he is
actually created because when I kept hearing home then I saw pictures of his like well
that's a fucking real deal. It's a fucking mine. His neighbors. Jesus Christ. Day one
they're like this will end soon. Eventually like what the fuck is going on over there.
Give a team. OK so. Now so first the tweakers came over because he was like hey man you
can get in on the gold with me and then we'll all have a bunch of gold at the end and then
we'll smoke it away. It's going to be fucking great and then we'll buy a boat. Like which
is weird already because if I find gold in my backyard I don't tell anyone. Nobody. No
I swear to God. Nobody. I mean maybe like your dad. Yeah. Or your brother. Yeah yeah
yeah. But you're not going like come on come on with a great gold rush on Maple Street.
Share a mine. Yeah yeah. Come on down to Claremont. No. Get in on the community mine. No gold is
a cave man. OK so here's the here's the here's the here's the hitch to come and work in the
mine. You got to bring some math. Oh interesting wrinkle. I like I like. So people are bringing
math and then they're getting high and digging in the mine together. He should just have never
even worried about gold. Just set up the system where people just bring a math to go dig. Hey
bring me some math you can go look for gold in my yard but there doesn't need to be the
gold. That's the red herring. Oh there's that math I cool man. Let's take a rip and then
you can go dig up my yard. Let me know when you find the gold. Tell your friends come over
we're having a digging camp. Math though. Math has to be brought. Oh fuck. He was also
so now he's also still working a little bit. Of course. That's what you want to hear. And
a neighbor said. He installed a hot water heater for me and talked about mineral rights.
And then again he installed a hot water heater for me and talked about mineral rights. He
was going to sell his house for a million dollars because he had all this gold and oil
in his yard. I don't know where the oil part came from. Yeah. It's insinuated. I thought
he was a little odd a little cookie but he was a nice man and he gave me a nice price.
Oh god. While he's down there like yeah you know what you got to do. You got to dig up
your yard. I think there might be silver. There's probably gold in there and if there
is there's oil to give them their brothers. They are totally brothers and brothers they
live together in your gym yard. OK so he was also at the same time teaching the tweakers
to be plumbers. Oh my god. So now they have carpentry skills. So other people were bringing
him meth and if they got him high then he would teach him how to be plumbers. I mean
can you imagine how fucking great this house was. Just next door. Next door I would have
to have a fucking binoculars. Clang clang clang. You don't know what the noise is coming from
the mine or the sink. Our teeth getting just chipped out. What the fuck is it. I think
they're smoking meth and digging again. So a tweaker would generally stay for three weeks
or a month before they realized the mine wasn't going to lead to anything and that they weren't
going to become plumbers and then they move on and then more tweakers would come. It was
just then they go to their next pyramid scheme too. I saw a couple of news reports and both
guys were like god known for like three weeks like it was. But you live here. Yeah I live
here but I know them about three weeks. And then tragedy strikes. Someone stole all of
Sean's plumbing tools. Jesus. Now I don't know who would do that. Well it couldn't have
been one of the tweakers. They have the honor system. Right. Who in this world would steal
the plumbing tools. Not the not the tweakers. No. So that must have been a rough day to
be like one of your first days there when the tools got stolen. Oh my god. This always
happened. Why are we using a fork. His neighbors if you can believe this filed a noise complaint
with police. Why because he built a mine. Jesus Christ. Have some respect. He built
a tweaker mine. And Sean filed a complaining it's a police for harassment. I'm pretty.
I would love to know if there was a price tag on it. Right. OK. So in February of 1995
he filed a notice informing the county of his plans to mine bedrock in his backyard. OK.
So he was basically staking a claim with the city. And the city was like yeah. You don't
need to do that. You own that. That's what a claim is. And so we don't do that. And you
could just go dig in your backyard. And Sean was like you take my fucking claim. Like he
was super mad. OK. Sure. They refused to accept his claim. And the city was going. Yeah. It's
not a thing. It's 1995. Just go do it man. People who can make pools and stuff like you
can get your backyard. You totally just go have a matter to accept the claim. No it's
your your plan to talk to the sheriff. I want to fight him for his badge like we do. OK.
There's no sure we have police. I'll have to talk to the sheriff and I'll meet him in
the town square at high noon. None of this is a thing. We will shoot each other. OK.
So. So now that's February between February and May is when shit gets really dark. Yeah.
It feels like we're headed that way. So Karen said he was really desperate to prove that
the mine was real because his friends are starting to be like no gold down there. I
wonder why. Do you think it's because there's no gold. He was no he was pulling yellow colored
rock out of the mine. Gold. He started taking gold out of the mine. Wait. Wait. He was pulling.
He was taking gold out of them. All right. It was gold. All right. Now around now around
the same time a couple of teenage kids from the neighborhood were coming around to collect
money from Sean teenage kids. Yeah. It doesn't sound good because they had been selling him
I guess on credit scrap gold. Wait. Yeah. What do you mean. Well like the way teenagers
get scrap gold. Right. OK. From like houses or their parents. Why is he buying it. That's
interesting. That's an interesting question. Why is this man with all this real gold buying
scrap gold though. So he was taking the scrap gold and melting it and putting it in the
mine. Oh dear. Oh boy. And the web gets sticky because he wanted to convince more triggers
to come over to dig and his friends want to come in. It was real. This is now. This now
feels like the methiest plan ever. It makes so little sense. It's like you could just
take the gold. Yeah. Why don't you just go steal from my house. Yeah. Why are you doing
this elaborate mind. It makes no sense. The mind sucks all the money and time you're spending
on the mind. You could just cut out the middle mind and go and get the math. Why. Why the
fake gold. Why the fake the fake gold makes it all crazy. At no point did he stop and
go wait a minute. There's an easy way to get math. Yeah. No. Yeah. I'll just take all
this time money and resource searching and I'll just put that towards getting math. It's
like no I need to buy gold for the mine I dug. What. You trust me. That way the tweakers
will dig for the real gold. Wait what. Oh God. I just love their teenage kids like yeah
okay man we'll help you out. Yeah. You know you look like a guy we could do this on credit
with. Yeah. Hey man where's our six hundred bucks for all the fake gold. Oh no it's in
the mind. You want to dig for it. No I know we know the deal. We know the deal asshole.
You guys could dig if you. All right cool. No wait a minute. Wait a minute. No no no
I fell for this before. Yeah I dug here for three weeks once. Oh Jesus. So Sean at this
time noticed that helicopters were chasing him. Oh boy. And he knew it was because the
government was trying to get the middle rights to his property. Well the government knows
they've got. They wouldn't take the claim would they. Well they wouldn't take the fucking
claim. And this is why. Yeah. They know it's a good hot spot. And even though they know
where he lives they're going to follow around town in helicopters. Obviously. Because they're
going to see where he's going. To. Do. Make sure that he still has the hole in his yard.
Just trust us. Everyone's on math. Everybody. Okay. So now it's April. It's not a good month.
It's nine months into the mine. And no actual gold show. Lots of scrap gold. He also hasn't
paid his mortgage in nine months. I wonder why. Why do you think that is. Oh wait nine
months nine months. Let me do the math here. I think the mine might be a taking away from
the mortgage. A little bit. A little bit. Yeah. His utilities are shut off. He has no more
plumbing tools to do any work with. So he can't run his jacuzzi gold finder. Yeah right
he has no power. No water. Nothing. He's just a guy with a hole in the ground. And at this
point his friends were like dude enough. We get it. We're totally tweakers too. But even
for us this seems weird. Nobody's dug in that mine more than me man. Yeah. But I'm telling
you I think it's time to stop the mine dream. So in April he went down into the mine and
he saw a god. Oh okay. Now this makes sense. And there was a pyramid. Okay. Oh boy. And
in the pyramid there was a dragon. Okay. Sure. And he. So he quit meth at this point. Yeah
he finished with meth. Okay. I just want to make sure meth's not involved in any of this.
And he and his friend Chuck were supposed to fight the dragon. Chuck. Right. Have I told
you about Chuck? I don't think I've heard specifically about Chuck. Okay. So Chuck is
like the only guy who is now hanging in there. He still sees the dream. Well I think that
Chuck and Sean sort of see things on the same level. Yeah. So here's Chuck. I'm excited.
I'll say between 80 and 84 there was an article that came out saying about a machine that
a bunch of people apartment owners down in Bay Park and a group in Las Vegas they all
had to go there and bought this machine. More of a kind. And basically what it is it's a
machine. I don't know how it works but it's got this sphere that has all these points
that pulse laser. You know you can. Digital technology was it optical digital technology.
Okay. You know what subliminal is right? Okay. This particular optical digital technology
is very capable of producing the same kind of thing. It's being pulsed on laser but
you're mind you're subconscious of digital. It picks it up. So it can literally be programming
you. Subliminally. Right. One day you wake up and all of a sudden your morals that used
to be over here and you don't even know if they've changed. It's been a bad one. I read
that in the library. Sean. I read that in the library. He read that in the library.
Just so you're wondering where he came up with that idea. Yes. Because he's cleaning
on drugs. He read it in the library. In the digital laser section. There are so many great
things that were just said. Can I give you my two favorite. Yup. Yup. A sphere with
points. Uh huh. Wait. Do you mean a triangle? No. I mean a sphere with points. Okay. And
when you're in the middle of a conversation of this nature. Uh huh. For the question.
You know what subliminal is? It can be asked. Is crazy. You're talking about a ball of light
that shoots lasers that you get the only one of. You know what turkey is. Okay. Cool.
Let's keep going. Okay. Because that's good to cover it. You'll see. I'm going to wrap
that around. That's basically just I want to make sure that you're a human who's grown
up. You know what subliminal is. All right. Good. Holy shit. So. So Sean. So he gets
it. Well Sean is having these. I'm going to call them paranoid delusions. I'm going to
call them visions of a visionary. So he is having these delusions of helicopters following
MSF and Chuck is there to say, Hey man, there's this machine that some apartment owners bought.
That's my favorite thing in the whole thing. By the way, who bought this machine but you
got your own buildings. My landlord. Landlord. It'll help them rent unused units. So Chuck
is around for all the government stuff and the weird stuff. And he's not a good not a
good friendship. No, this guy is not the best guy. It's not a good influence. Nope. Nope.
So he said that at times Sean would be on one side of town and he'd hear people talking
about something and then he'd go to the other side of town and different people would be
talking about the same thing. Like a sporting event. At first he thought it was a coincidence,
but it kept happening and happening. So it wasn't a coincidence. No. Was it? No. It
was what is known as news. You believe that Bloomberg, huh? Yeah, I know the worst. You
believe that Bloomberg? Oh my God. No, the Bloombergs are following me. I know the charge.
I can't believe the charges missed that field goal. Chuck is having similar things happen
to him. Oh, what? Okay.
I started having weird visions. What do you see? At one point, yeah, I really did. At
one point, I really wondered if I was okay. This is why you're using crystal. I was using
crystal at the time. Yeah. One question. I just have one. I just have one follow up.
You know what subliminal is? Okay. I mean, right? Yeah, not good. No, none of the who's
recording all this shit. They did. They did a weird documentary on this, but it wasn't
like it focused on the area, not the people. It focused more on like, check out this suburb.
Like it was very weird. A place to not move. A city you don't want to be in. So they sound
good. They sound good together, right? I don't feel like anyone's going to take a tank. So
in April, Sean's living girlfriend dies of a drug overdose. Jesus. I mean, that's surprising.
It's surprising that he had a girlfriend. He also filed two damage claims against the
city for $2 million because they dug a mine in his yard. One of them was for police negligence.
Okay. I guess because his girlfriend died of drugs, right? And the other one was for
false arrest. I'm assuming they came in and arrested him. Probably arrested him was just
bullshit because he's him. So that's illegal. You can't arrest the mine digger. He can't
arrest the arrestable. So now he has been digging for 10 months, May, and they foreclose
on his house. Which is shocking. Yeah, shocking. Also a problem because that's where he keeps
the mine. Yeah. And the next person is going to look at the house. He's going to be like,
Oh, it's great. I love this closet. I'm sorry. Is there a mine out back? It's a three bedroom
and it comes with a sluice and a mine. Look at that. I'm sorry. Is it a sluice and a mine?
Yes. Oh my God. Honey, this would be great. You can turn this into your dark room. Wait
a minute. What'd you say a mine? And a sluice. Yep. That hot tub is actually not a hot tub.
It's what we call a sluice. It's a golden dirt divider. The previous tenant fought dragons
down there and talked to God. All at no extra charge. No extra charge. God lives down there.
Start as the dragon. You'll fight him with your friend check, but that's all included.
So they foreclose on his home at dusk on May 18, 1995, Sean got into a Chevy van with his
personalized license plates that said, come on, K-A-N-F-I-X. What? Can fix. And he drove
to the armory in Claremont on the north side of San Diego. Can fix. He was shirtless. Who's
got time for his shirt? He drove onto the armory. Just like that. This is right after
this is like right after Oklahoma City. Yeah. Oklahoma City happened that summer, right?
So yeah, they had no security in place. Good. He just drove right on and his credentials
weren't checked. They weren't even required. He just gave a wave, I assume. With no shirt.
And he drove over to the tanks and just started trying to get into tanks. Jesus Christ.
So the tanks are padlocked. I mean, can you imagine where you need to be to be like, I'm
going to go take a fucking tank. Then you just drive over. Drive and do it. Imagine.
Marica. I mean, why are we hated? Oh God. He just. You know, I think I'm going to go
steal a tank. Hey, so he broke into two tanks, but he couldn't start them. Okay, so here's
the scene. Because they were stick. There's a shirtless guy in sweatpants and tennis shoes
trying to start tanks and nobody notices. Nobody is like, well, that's weird. It's one of those
things that perhaps was so crazy looking that they were like has to be legit. He's got to
be a tank man or something. I wish that was true. But it turns out that everyone is off
the clock at five and six PM. So they had all got home. There was no one there. Oh God.
So the third tank works. That's the third one's a charter. He fires it up and rumbles
over the chain link fence and drives out with a 60 ton tank. A man on meth who's talked
to God is now driving a tank. Okay, so no, you ask you ask what he's doing, right? What
is he doing, David? That's an interesting question. That's one that came from the heart
of it. Let's check. So he's going to drive to city hall in his tank. And then he's going
to demand to be able to make a statement. I have a statement to make. What is your
statement? First of all, claims should be given in this city. All right, take him out.
Now I know that you're all thinking, why should we listen to this guy with two teeth and no
shirt and a tank that he stole? My second point is you should be able to wrestle with
a broken back. Point number three, God is awesome. Dragons are dicks. Point four, spheres
with points are subliminally giving us morals. Do you know what subliminal is? Okay, the
tanks weapons, a 105 millimeter cannon, a 1.27 millimeter aircraft gun, a 7.26 millimeter
machine gun were not loaded. So we can be thankful that they were not okay that the
not National Guard wasn't so stupid to just keep them laying around arm. I really thought
I mean, I'm amazed that they weren't. That is amazing. It is fucking amazing. That is
amazing. You would think, right? You would think. Yes. Somebody's side work would be
load the tanks, go to bed. But the M 68 three tank can reach a speed of 45 miles an hour.
And it weighs 16 tons. And it can travel 300 miles on a full tank, which it had. So meaning
it can crush tons of shit. Yeah, which is what happened. So he's just crushing. I mean,
you've seen the videos. He's we didn't crush homes. He crushed cars, mobile homes. You
went through a lot of mobile homes around the street. He the greatest thing is when
he goes over the fire hydrants and then they just squirt up. But he also gets caught like
in between a freeway. That's the end. Yeah, that's the end. So and me and while this is
happening, the cops are like, Hey, there's no way to stop a tank. Here's the thing about
tanks. Hey, I'm looking in the manual police manual. And I'm not seeing tank. Hey, can
we shoot the tires out? How does that work? We've laid out some spikes, maybe. So they're
calling the National Guard going, Hey, how do we stop a tank? Hey, guys, no guards going
off the clock, bro. I got off at six. So the police just started clearing roads. If he
went on a road, they would just try and clear it as fast as they could. So he wouldn't run
over anybody in a car. Yeah. He ran 40 vehicles. Attempted to hit all the police cars pursuing
him. He plowed into bridges. He took out utility poles, fire hydrants, signal lights, leaving
a huge power outage and traffic jams. All of this. Did he kill anyone? He did not kill
anybody. He only hit one car that had a van that had a lady or kid in it, but they didn't
get hurt. Okay. This is my favorite quote of the entire business. This is a guy who
saw him. So his little head is out of the tank. He's just having the fucking time of his life.
He looked like he was having fun. He finally hit. So he he was trying to lose the cops
and he's on the freeway and he wanted to go over the other side so they couldn't follow
him. He really wanted to make a U. E. U. E. Yeah. Flip a U. E. So he tried to go over
the cement divider, but because he hit it sideways instead of going like more at a straight
angle, yeah, it got stuck. So then he's he's caught. Yeah, can't move. He can't move.
Well, he could. Okay. So the the cops jump up with bolt cutters and they've got a mechanic
from the base with them. I like that they're attacking a tank with bolt cutters. I guess
that's how you get in. Yeah, they're like, All right, got the bolt cutters. Who's ready?
So he refused to surrender or relinquish controls and a cop fired one shot. Well, I can tell
you this. So I read this on a on a website where a guy said, I used to work with a guy.
So when when he when the tank is stopped, two cops jump up on top and then there's a guy
in a Hawaiian shirt alongside him and you're like, Okay, so that's like a that's a party
guy or maybe there's a guy when it comes out. It's like, who's that guy? It turns out that
guy is a mechanic from the base. I guess in uniform mid Lou out. We're having a white
party. I gotta go. A guy stole a tank. Don't do limbo without me. Okay, the guy in the
Hawaiian shirt opening the tank hatch worked for me in 97. His name is Palmer. He was he
was working on his personal car on his day off at the National Guard motorpool. So he
has his day off yet wink, wink, working on his car, stealing equipment. So the cops and
MPs roll up. He's the only one there. And so he jumps in the car with them to help if
he can do anything. When the tank hit the barrier, Palmer and two CHP officers jumped
on the tank. Palmer quickly opened the emergency hatch. As soon as he opened it, one CHP officer
weapon drawn started screaming for the guy to get his hands out of the controls. Palmer
says, Hey, cops, I can get the guy out without you having to shoot him. It's no big deal.
And he keeps saying this and tapping the cop on the shoulder, which you can see in the
video, trying to trying to get the cop to move aside so we can get in there and get
the guy out. Then the guy in the tank looks up at the officer with what Palmer described
as a blank uncaring stare. And then reach back for the controls. The officer shot down,
hit him in the shoulder. The bullet entered between the left collarbone and pierced his
heart and he died in seconds. Jesus Christ. And of meth run. Wow. That's I can't believe
they that's such blood. That's what I hate that. Yeah, I do hate that because how great
would it be if he was alive? It would be great if he was alive. It would be great to know
I not even for the sake of the fact that he shouldn't be killed because he didn't have
to be killed, which is totally a huge part of this. Yeah, and happens too much. But yeah,
we could be like, walk us through it. What was it like when you were smiling? Yeah, I
know you could talk to a guy who was just destroying a town with a tank and having a
fucking great time. And this is just a layman. This is not a man who this is how you want.
If you're ever going to drive a tank, this is really how you want it to play out. You
don't have to go through all the fucking training and learn all the bull. You just want to go
in there and fucking have a little video game. Do it. Yeah, just go do it. He was seriously
playing Grand Theft Auto before Grand Theft Auto came around. The state of California
paid 149,000 to cover property damage. It moved all the tanks out of the National Guard
Armories and relocated them to Camp Roberts and San Luis Obispo and Fort Ordo Barstow.
But again, the solution would be just don't have fuel in the fucking tanks. They took
batteries out. They took the batteries out of the tank. Okay, good. But you could do
that and keep them there. Yeah. Yeah. The National Guard was considered negligent, which
I cannot believe. No. Why? Because they get an hour of downtime, complete downtime. The
state eventually paid damage claims to 20 individuals, companies in the city. The payout
included 10,000 for Pacific Bell. I love that that they paid 10,000 to the. The bike is
on the telephone line. Yeah, they keep knocking out light poles. Really? What the fuck? Hey,
I added it on the bill. Don't you fucking turn my utilities off, fuckers. I got a tank
now. A coroner's investigator said Nelson smelled of alcohol. Sean Nelson liked rum.
Listen, I call the mad relice Nelson earlier. It's a good rum. So fucking smelled like
I mean, I mean, meth. Yeah. How? Because you you had seen that a million times. Yes.
But the story leading up to it is fucking insane. So don't you think in a way it is
almost like it's almost the because nobody died except for it's almost the best way
to go out. It is the greatest way to go out because nobody died. He actually I mean, everyone
got money for their stuff. Yeah. I mean, sure you're you couldn't maybe take that vacation
you're planning your motor home or your car was crushed. You got a hell of a story. You
couldn't you didn't have power for a couple of days. But looking back on it, you get to
say that dude crushed our car. And you know what happens as soon as he goes to heaven.
He sees God. He sees the dragon. And they're like, we did not think you were going to fucking
do it, bro. You are the man. Holy shit. When I talked to you in that mine, I was like,
no way does he pull this off. You left him. We were like, yeah, right. We'll talk when
he gets the tank. I mean, Jesus, you're the real deal, brother. You're the real fucking
deal. I guess that I guess tweaking does permanent damage because Chuck seems like he's still
there even though he's not on drugs anymore. Oh, yeah, totally. Oh, you mean like your
part? Yeah, you're permanently rewires you totally. Is your cousin rewired? Is he off
of it? Well, he wasn't even math. He was just schizophrenic. But I have other cousins who
or relatives who have done that. And yeah, I mean, you you really are eventually you're
just dealing with like a language. It would be like sitting down with a Martian. Yeah.
And you being like, yeah, my girlfriend does this. And he'd be like, oh, well, the railroad's
trying to kill me. You'd be like, okay, okay, well, we both have things. I'm going to go
over there. Shall we split a meal? I think we could agree on food, right? But yeah, it's
watching me. Yeah. As he digs through his wires. Because then he maybe might not be
a great because it would be great. He would be a great. Where are they now? Great. You
know, and he turns out he's in a band now. And you know what else? I mean, what I love
is when people go and do like motivational speaking tours about how they turn their
lives around. Oh my God, he's a better guy. He'd be the best. He'd be like my rock bottom.
My rock bottom was about 15 years ago when I stole a tank and got it caught on a free
freeway medium. After after my gold mine went bust. By the way, I was drunken on meth
at the time and got in a dragon and told me to do it. Can you sit down? You can wait to
go to the bathroom for a minute on and my speech is called can do. This is why you can
do anything you put your mind to just make sure your mind's put to something right. Holy
fuck. He's my favorite. It's great. It's really is a shame that he's dead. It's great. I mean,
yeah, it's almost better this way because otherwise he would have just lived probably
a wasted life. Probably. But there's always the hope that this would have been his bottom.
Oh, well, if not, I would love to see his bottom. He would definitely be going to jail.
Yes. Who knows for how long. I like I don't know how I don't know if they have that if
there's a if there's a statute where they're like, uh, so you stole. What's the sense for
stealing? What did the forefathers say about tank theft? Do we have that anywhere? Also,
when you're in jail, hard to find a crew. Hard to find a crew. That's the Aryans. That's
the blank pat their brotherhood. Those guys are the molesters. Where do the tank people
sit? Is there a table of tank folk? There's just one guy's chomping on a cigar over here.
I fucked a tank. That'll do. That's my boy. It's my guy right there. All right. Well,
yeah, good. Oh, boy. Okay. Here we go. Hi there, dollar people. This is Gareth, not
Gary. Gareth enough already. I've got some stand updates I wanted to keep you updated
on. Join me on the road. We're having a lot of laughs. March 13. I will be at Summit City
Comedy in Fort Wayne, Indiana Tuesday, March 14. I'll be at Helium Comedy Club in Indian
apolis, March 15. Wednesday, I'll be at the Louisville Comedy Club in Louisville, Kentucky.
March 16. I'll be at the Columbus Funny Bone in Columbus, Ohio. Dayton, Ohio, March 17,
Friday at the Funny Bone. March 18. I'll be at the Funny Bone in Perrysburg, Ohio. And
that's two shows that night. March 19. I will be at Hilarity's and it'll be Hilarious in
Cleveland, Ohio. March 21. I'll be in Lexington, Kentucky. I'm drunk at Comedy Off Broadway.
March 22. I will be in St. Louis at the Galleria. March 23. I will be at the Comedy Club of
Kansas City. And Friday, March 24. I'll be in Des Moines, Iowa. Same with March 25, Saturday,
Des Moines, Iowa. And then March 26. I'll be at the Funny Bone in Omaha, Nebraska. Also
April 12. The Tacoma Comedy Club. I told you I was drunk. And then April 13. I will
be in Spokane. And then April 14. And April 15. I will be in Bozeman, Montana at Last
Best Comedy. You can go to garethrenalds.com for all that ticket information. So come join
me on the road. garethrenalds.com. We're having laughs. I'm drunk.