The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 60 - The Past Times with Louis Katz

Episode Date: February 2, 2024

This week Dave Anthony picks a paper from a day in history and reads it to co-host Gareth Reynolds and this week, comedian Louis Katz. Watch his special The Best Comedian You've Never Heard Of  Rocket Money Redbubble Merch

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I'm here too. Just... All right, everybody. Welcome to the Pastimes Podcast. Each week we go through an old newspaper from a random date in history picked up by Dave Anthony. I'm Garrett Reynolds, and I've never seen it before, and neither is our guest this week. Louie Katz.

Hey. Thanks for having me. You're welcome. You don't go by Louie,z. Hey, thanks for having me. You're welcome. You don't go by Louie, so. No, but it's spelled incorrectly. It's my parents' fault. It's not your fault. Well, what we do on these shows is we change people's names.

They've done it to me, so it's kind of a right of passage, if you like. What do you call him? Gary. Gary, lots of bad stuff. He really is upset about it. So you have a special that's out now. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And it just came out a couple months ago we like to do the promos up top so that people actually listen that's great i appreciate that yeah thanks is called present uh... tense and it's on youtube and uh... yes it's done pretty well in there we seem to like it so i'm happy if it hadn't done well would you mention that and i would i'd be like please you know sorry please i need to be one of you what one person could watch it

I have zero views. It's embarrassing nothing on YouTube. You ever tell people to smash the subscribe button. No, but I think it yeah I was like how sad do you want your promo? That's what I get that point where like I tell him nobody's buying tickets in Springfield or should I just pretend like things are good Anytime you see a comedian doing a promo on Instagram, like so the tickets aren't selling there. Yeah, yeah. When you know the secret comedian language, it's like you get a special video, Missoula. It's like, oh, this guy's tankin'.

It's also the opposite. Tickets are going fast. No, they're not. They're actually not. This show's gonna sell out. I think you're doing a little wishful promo there. All right. It was you and I that were in Jacksonville, right?

When the Trayvon Martin. Oh yeah, that's crazy. We were in Jacksonville working together and the Trayvon Martin verdict was, and the whole bar applauded. We were just like, man, you're just like, can I get out of here now? They all broke into applause and bitches me.

Oh man. Oh, man. Oh, Scott, we're crazy. I forgot about that. They're handing around free shots. I mean, I'll do a free shot, but I'm not, like, happy with why. The rationale I don't love. The free liquor is great. Wow.

That was literally, I was like, I've never gone back to Florida. Oh, my God. That was a weird gig. It was I'm never going back to Florida. Oh my God. That was a weird gig. It was like in a hotel where you stayed, so you did, and it just so there's no separation. I just did that. I did one of those. Last weekend I did was one of those.

Yeah. Where I was like beautiful, and then it was literally like a banquet room, and I was like, what is this? No, not good. And you can't escape. I'm like a Canadian. Then everyone who saw you knows where you're staying.

Oh yeah. That's right. Luckily not a ton of people were there. So anyway, not to keep bragging about my career. So Louis, we like to guess the year that this could be from. That's kind of just the way we started up. It's the warm up swing. So I'm gonna guess.

It could be, can I guess? Yeah, you get to get you a go first. 1908. Wow, that's very confident. Did you come in with that? Did you, what is your, you're so're so sure did you see it? Very very good. I don't know I listened to a bunch of episodes yesterday to get ready for this Yeah, I feel like you say 1908 a lot. Oh, I was like I'm gonna take I was like is this a get is this a gimmick

I'm gonna say is a year and blow his mind did not throw it I didn't notice and that's not that's not true at all You know the other one people told me recently is, boy, you sure compare stuff to Brewster's Millions a lot. Oh my God, that, yeah. I was like, okay. Which is hilarious, because I've never seen it, so I never know what you're talking about.

Yeah, oh God. Oh God, that's the real crime. I'm gonna guess that we are also in 1908. It's a great year, so the first time we're gonna do the same guess. So what's interesting is... He's right and I'm wrong. He's right, you're totally wrong.

It's 1972, which is basically what you were saying. More or less. Yeah. I feel real bad about this interaction. Okay. All right, 72. It's New York, have you heard of New York? Oh, this is gonna be great.

The ones I listened to were like, I couldn't even understand, it was like Shakespeare. I'm like, what are they saying? I have no idea. So this, at least hopefully understand it. We've been doing this podcast since then. New York, New York, The Daily News, February 2nd, 1972. Okay.

Headline, Hughes Case Sluice Hunt-O-Homes. That's like an actor warm-up phrase. Yeah, Hughes Case Hunt-A-Homes. That's like an actor warm-up phrase. Yeah, yeah, they were Hughes Case Sleuths. Hughes Case, yeah, yeah. Backstage. Red leather, yellow leather, Hughes Case Sleuths. A worldwide search has been started by federal agents for the mysterious George Gordon Holmes.

Do you start an international search with federal agents that feels a bit like you would want some international team? Yeah, that's a good point. Yeah, that's a good point. I just, shouldn't we have heard of, 70, not that long ago, and you're like, wow, this is, yeah, no.

And I don't never heard of it. It shows you how fast things are coming at us. Yeah, for real. We don't even have time. According to author Clifford Irving, he played an important part in the meetings between Irving and the man he believed was billionaire Howard Holmes.

Okay, so this guy, George Gordon Holmes, was getting in meetings between this author and Howard Hughes. Oh. I thought Howard Hughes. Oh. I thought Howard Hughes was in there, but Holmes is also a billionaire? Howard Holmes? So the guy, George Gordon Holmes,

sounds like a fake person. Right. And so there's an author and Howard Hughes and somehow this guy was getting involved in their discussions. Okay, so are you saying to be clear, is this like the fly? They sort of fused into one man or am I missing something?

No, no, you're completely out of your fucking mind. Okay, so I'm a problem in, okay. Yeah, no, you were. I wasn't sure if you weren't clear or if I am the draw. I'm considering you shooting you with a Trent gun right now. It's not gonna get me on any more clarity,

although it might wake me up a little. If such a man exists as Irving swears he does, he holds. What? This is the daily news. I don't, what? I don't, this is very confusing. Every sentence is making it less clear. Yeah, because these are one of those, it's one of the situations where we're supposed to come in

already knowing, because everyone's been talking about Gordon George Holmes for like a couple weeks. Right. Oh, okay. So, yeah, so. People are like, it's a shorthand. So if such a man exists as Irving swears he does, he holds a key to the incredible tangle that has developed since Irving's purported autobiography of Holmes was denounced by Hughes spokesman. It's a lot of names.

Okay, so Irving wrote an autobiography, because autobiography is in quotations. Sure. Of Hughes, but then Hughes. So not an autobiography. Yeah, well you can't write an autobiography for someone else, right? Yeah, I'm just trying.

Oh, you go. They freak out. It really becomes a problem. Legally it becomes precarious pretty quickly. So, but then he wrote the autobiography, and then Hughes said, no, that's bullshit. Oh, God. He wrote an autobiography on spec without checking in the guy. What a horrible chain.

Wrong order. Richard Hannah, who's Hughes, man in Los Angeles, again said yesterday that his boss does not know anybody named George Gordon Holmes. So, okay, so who is the author? No, George Gordon Holmes is the mystery person. Yes. Wow. Who potentially doesn't exist okay?

Probably doesn't okay all right man. I know it's not easy. Yeah, we're starting off hard here You thought guessing the year was the hard part Okay, it's gonna get more confusing good Admitted that a man named Holmes works for Hughes H's it would be great. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, totally. But refuse to discuss this further

or even give Holmes first name. Well, that's okay. So he's like, so they're like, well, does a guy named Holmes work for Howard Hughes? Yes. What's his first name? No. I don't know.

No. No, no. stop doing it. If they could put it more clearly, Hughes hired someone to write his book, he didn't like how the book turned out, and now he's like, I don't even know what you're talking about, and that's it, right? That's the story? That's how it sounds, yeah.

Okay, all right. I would've probably taken me listening to the episode to be like, that's what's happening. Oh, so I think Irving is saying that he got all this information from Holmes and now people are saying Holmes might not exist. That's what I think. Okay, well again, yeah, the publisher's like, what?

Holmes exists. This is Hughes. This is Hughes being crazy Hughes. Yes, that's right. This is in bottles. As he was drinking a jar of urine. Yeah. I don't believe this man exists.

I wish we could probably listen to the guy drinking his own poop. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Irving has described George Gordon Holmes as a man known to me to be a trusted, bona fide associate of Mr. Hughes. It was to this man, Irving, has sworn that he gave one of the McGraw Hill Checks,

so the publishing checks, for 325,000, which was intended for Hughes as payment for his life story. Shit. Wow. That's a lot of money for a life. Not for Howard Hughes. No, no, but 72. Still a lot of money.

There's a lot of money for the publishing company. It is. It is. Yeah. So the publishing company. It is, it is. It is. Yeah. So the publishing company gave a check. I mean, maybe this guy, maybe this guy Holmes is real and he's just a con man who was like,

I work for Howard Hughes and he wants you to do a book. That's true. We could be, we are very curious what's going on in there. Okay. We hear poo stories. Is it true he's wearing poo and drinking pee? Hello. We've got the cover and the title.

I would read that. He is wearing poo and drinking pee. The Howard Hughes story. Written by Ghostman. Autobiography. Autobiography. Written by this man. Autobiography. Autobiography, written by this man.

It was also this man, according to Irving, who blindfolded him and took him to meetings with Hughes. What? And who told him on the telephone after the furor broke out over the book, quote, the old man Hughes is not well. I'll take care of my problems and you take care of your problems.

Whoa. This definitely take care of my problems and you take care of your problems. Whoa. This definitely is one of those ones where if we had had the build up, we'd be like, wow, but instead we're like, what? Yeah, yeah, totally. But you were right, from the beginning, a book came out and Howard Hughes was like, this is not, I had nothing to do with this shit.

It's not an autobiography. And then this guy's like, no, some guy was taking his blindfolded into a room with Howard Hughes. I saw the poo covered man. I read chapter four. Hello, Howard. It's hard to read with my fingernails. Yeah, yeah.

Does he take off the blindfold, what is in there, or is he still blindfolded? Well, that's what I'm wondering, it sounds like he remained blindfolded, right? He remains blindfolded. What a great way, I mean, what a great ruse to be like. And then when I was 11, your eyes are showing a little bit.

Pull that down a little bit. We're in a bowling alley. Is this your mansion? Absolutely. I had the jalapeno poppers. Now listen. Okay, Irving denied yesterday a report that he identified a former Hughes employee,

John Meyer, as Holmes. This is Jesus Christ. Meyer is 38, a Democratic candidate for senator in New Mexico and has been subpoenaed to testify here tomorrow before a grand jury, which is now sitting daily to hear testimony in the Irving Hughes case, so there's a lawsuit. Okay. Wow. Irving is also scheduled to testify tomorrow.

Maya arrived in New York yesterday. So, penas are being sent to many men who, like Maya, formally work for Hughes. This is who's suing who? That is, that I'm not sure of, but. All suing each other. Isn't it nice this is 1972 and none of those billionaires are running for president.

Isn't that nice? They're just doing what you're supposed to do. Sitting in the room covered in poo. By the way. Trying to eat sushi with their giant fingernails. I'm not lying, I would really consider Hughes. I'd be like, I might vote Hughes. What?

I don't know. I like what he says about the, you don't need as much water because you could just drink your pee pee. He's good with planes? Yeah. I mean, with the drought coming, that is the answer. Yeah, yeah, literally.

Two minute rebuttal, Mr. Hughes. Okay, listen. I'm gonna put my foot in my mouth, literally. This guy's pretty good. According to Hannah, Meyer worked for Hughes for five or six years and was fired about three years ago by the director of Hughes Nevada properties. And then that guy was fired by Hughes.

Okay. Get fired by Hughes is probably pretty common back then. Yes. You there, you blinked, go. Howard. Here's the next section, sub-headline. Atomic bombs involved. Whoa, that's the next headline?

He's the surprise. What? Mr. Meyer was responsible for acquisition of mining claims in Nevada and dealing with the Atomic Energy Commission in connection with Mr. Hughes' opposition to testing bombs. Wow. Whoa.

That's quite an addendum. This is really getting, he worked for Mr. Hughes in Nevada for about two years. Gotta go to the next page, sorry gentlemen. But this is a separate article, this is, I don't, this is all, all the news is about Hughes. This is the Hughes News. It's the Daily Hughes.

It's just the thickening of the story, basically. I mean, this is absolutely batshit crazy. I'm pretty sure you're right. And now I can't find the rest of the story. Well, so do you think the story ever actually even existed? A lot of people are wondering if that ever happened. If we've been here recording at all. It's just so weird.

That is creepy. He disappeared the whole story from this podcast years later. Get away. I think Hughes whole story from this podcast. Yeah, years later. Get away. Does it say Q's ate my JPEG? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha but I can't find the rest of the story. Yeah, Carl Madden in a TV series, he's gonna start a one hour weekly detective series for Streets of San Francisco. Who is Carl Maldon, sorry, Carl Maldon? The same question. Really?

Yeah. You never watched Streets of San Francisco? No. What year was this? A young Michael Douglas? No, I didn't know that. Is this person? It was like an action, like a modern noir

San Francisco thing, right? Yeah, it was actually a great show. I've never seen it, but I've seen clips of it. Like it's like a grimy 70s San Francisco, yeah. Yeah, that's right. Well. What? No, I'm just.

It feels like I've lost some points, is that? Well, it's not great. I mean. It's actually fine to have not heard of. No, I totally disagree. Right now there's a lot of disappointed people out there. I don't think you're right. How do you know who Carl, he's a great actor.

Honestly, I thought I was a character until just now. I'm not, Hollywood decided I'm not. They decided I'm a podcaster. I said I was an actor. There may as well be a child telling you he has like a dump truck. Uh. Uh.

Uh. Uh. Uh. Okay, next story. Waiter loses on tip of lip. Okay, so this is, this is one of those fucking papers where they're trying to just do

cute little clever headline. Okay. I mean, it goes on for years. Like, well, yeah, but like this is a very New York. It's a tabloid. It's a free paper in the subway. Yeah, so they're already doing it. And I never, the post is actually good at it.

This is bad. Yes, yeah, the post is. The post is this. I would take a pun writing headline job at the post. Oh my God, hard beat. Yeah, they kill it. Yeah, you would. Oh, it would be my dream job.

It would be absolutely be my dream job. Yeah, Chris Christie urinated his pants. You mean Chris Pisti? Did we have lunch? Ha ha ha ha ha. A waiter at the Swank Carlisle Hotel lost a $100,000 lawsuit yesterday against a 78 year old widow who he charged,

kissed him against his will. This is a great lawsuit. Is it? I'm on the way, 100% on the waiter side. Yeah, yeah, for sure. $100,000 for getting kissed by an old lady. Hey, listen. Hey, me too, you know?

That's what I'm saying, this is, this is harassment. Well, you don't like germs. No, I don't. I mean, for $100,000? Are you kidding me? I'd lick her butt crack. Are you kidding? I'm like, her butt crack. Are you kidding? I'm like, yeah, I'll see you in court, man.

Wait, you licked my butt crack. I don't, listen, we don't have a security camera, so who knows? All I know is my mouth tastes like your butt and I need a rent. You should be sewing you, it's my asshole. Well, ma'am, listen, I don't know what to tell you. I'll see you in court. Good Lord. The waiter, Charles Zovai, 53,

and this is, so they always used to put people's addresses in the, I don't know when they stopped. This is 72. I was just talking to someone about this. That's crazy. So the waiter of 1471 Second Avenue, so they, and this is 72. At one point, some like editor was like,

everyone we've reported on in the last month has been murdered. That's crazy. What are the odds? They were like, I think we need to stop saying where they are. Wow, wow. He charged that he was assaulted by Miss Lola Davelier, socialite widow of the New England.

That's a great socialite widow name. I mean, that's like a fictional name. Lola Daveliere in the restaurant with her lips. I believe. Me? Me? What happened to nothing? Lola?

Charles says he went to Miss Daveliere's five room suite at the Carlyle. He's asking for it. On the night of December 17th. What did he think was gonna happen? You went to her room, right? Come on. To help her clean up after a dinner party,

and while they were in the kitchen, he said she suddenly embraced and kissed him. I can't. She was drunk. This is really, I can't believe this is a... 100, 100, 100, 100, 100, 100, 100, 100, 100. Yeah, it's really crazy. You met back then.

So you met with a good lawyer. People were like, buddy, even for now that's crazy. Like 100,000 dollars, she didn't kiss him. I mean, they must have thought like... His lips are no longer his, what's the price on that? So she's whatever, a billionaire or whatever. So they must have thought like, yeah, she'll just pay it off. Yeah, right.

And she was like, no! Wow, I see. Well, you could have just she'll just pay it off. Yeah, right. And she was like, no! Wow, I see. Well, you could have just probably just fucked her and made some more money. Bingo, bingo. That's what I said. I like the way your mind works. Someone's a comedian.

You abandoned fucking her and then just being like, so you owe me money. And she's like, that's not how this works. Paperwork. My fateful misstep. The comedian's mind is like, how do I never get back to Jackson? Yeah, like, yeah.

Your solution is like, should have done a worse thing. Should have begged her. You just still made nothing, Louis. Right. But I don't know, man. I was, to have like a sugar mommy, I think that sounds, that seems pretty good.

By the way, sugar mommy is so much creepier than sugar mama. Sugar mama? I need to go, ah! Oh come on, I'm the sugar mommy. I'd have forgot the term. I forgot the term. Sugar mommy is great though.

Is that sugar mommy? That's sugar mama. I mean, it would be sugar mama would be the one for one. That sounds sexier. It is, yes. Well it's way less like my diaper. You know. Yeah.

Come on, I'm gonna feed him his steak tartar. Look at the plane coming towards you. Also, he's a much younger man, still 58. You know, it's like, he's like a young. He's 53. Oh, 53. All right, so still. 25 years.

That is a lot younger, but it's not like some like. But if you're 53, a waiter at this place, I like the play. You know what I mean? You're like, I'm looking for one last score to get. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, acting didn't work out. I've been an actor for so long.

Fuck Broadway! Robyn had a head holding. He added that the attack caused him injury. Act! My lips broke! She broke my face! Caused him injury. That's a hack. My lips broke. She broke my face. Caused him injury pain and suffering. The waiter also said that Miss Dabalier asked him

to become her husband or lover and offered to take him on a trip around the world. This is what I'm saying. Around the world. That was all there. That's what I'm saying. I knew this was there. You do take it. Yeah's what I'm saying. I knew this was there. You do take it.

Yeah, come on. Yeah, absolutely. He's gay, right? Oh, maybe. And that's why it's why, like, he can't do it. He can't do it. I still think. I would sign up for it.

Gay or straight, yeah. Around the world. Yeah. Around the world. Yeah, without question. Also, she might have just met her anus. Well, around the world. Yeah. Around the world. Yeah. Without question. Also, she might've just met her anus. Well, we're finally.

Around the world. I hate to say it, but we bottomed out early. Under questioning by his lawyer, Charles described the. By his lawyer, his lawyer's like, I have to cross examine you and you're mine. I can't read this word, but Charles described the buzz as a baby kiss. Jeez. So she just gave him a little peck.

Wow. Unless she likes to tongue babies. Well, that's the sugar mommy. I definitely, look, not okay, I guess, but it's also like, this is the era when mistletoe was fine. Yes. You know what I mean?

So it's like 100,000? Well, I just didn't even know people could sue for this in the same way. I know, I don't know. You know what? Yeah, it seems crazy. Cause even now people be like, well, come on. I thought people can sue for this until two years ago.

That's what I thought. Yeah, you know what I mean? Yeah, right, yeah. By the way, cancel culture. Lola's lawyer called the wait's tale a nefarious lie. It was he who forced a kiss on her lips, he said. Well, that I'm not buying. No.

Ha ha ha ha. She didn't complain to Carlisle management because he pleaded with her that if she did complain, he would lose his job. This is what I think happened. There was a vibe. He kissed her and then he's like, now I'm in a black male, yeah.

Maybe. That's what he was trying for. Maybe. I have a buddy who had lived here in Hollywood and he had a worker come over from a cable company or something and he was like, don't go in that room, my dog's in there, my dog's not friendly, do not go in that room,

don't go in that room, don't go in that room. Guy walks in the room, my dog's not friendly, do not go in that room, don't go in that room, don't go in that room, guy walks in the room and then is like, I got bit! And then like Susan. Whoa! Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Yeah.

The guy should have fucked that dog. I think you're supposed to. You begged that dog in that situation. You know what, it's hard to judge the situation without seeing how attractive either of them are. Is she a hot 78? Okay, no, it's pretty typical 78. And I know such a standard 78.

She's a 78-year-old woman. Seven-year-old woman, yeah. That's what you'd expect. I don't know what you were expecting, like a woman from Titanic. Hey, come here, Louis. You like em' rooms? So, hate me like one of your weird friends.

I was picturing Corella DeVille, because of the name, and she's kind of hot. She could get it. Yeah, right? I'd be like, goddamn, that's a lot of puppy bones, but you know what I mean? That's an upside for sure. It says here her cookie was like a 15 year old's though.

That's the best times I've been right back. That's the best times I've been right back. That's the best times I've been right back. Deciding ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Yeah, he went too high. He went, 15 grand maybe? Maybe. 100 is nuts. No, 100 is worse. My life is ruined. She kissed me and I don't know what I am anymore. Yeah.

I just can't believe any kind of suing man versus woman for this. Almost at any age level. I can't, it's hard to imagine, honestly. And just let's be thankful for a minute that the genders are not swapped because there'd be a lot less jokes flying from three dudes. 100%.

Maybe like, well, listen, I mean, poor lady. You know, that can ruin your life. That's rude life before. Come on, honestly. Honestly. So, Garrett, the other day, I was charged for something that I had no idea I was still subscribing to.

Hit and run. Now, it was one of my kids, like a game my kid had signed up for like years ago. I had totally forgotten about it. It was just one of those annual like charges that pop up. He'd stopped using it like, I mean, when he was like eight or something. And then I had no idea where the email was or how to get a hold of anybody, you know, and then, you know, where are they available from 10 to two or some nonsense. Plus, who wants to sit on the phone for an hour? You want to sit on the phone

for an hour while they try to talk you out of it? Well, not with them, but if you're talking about you and I chatting, I would, I'd love that. That'd be really nice. There's an answer to this, Gareth. Rocket Money was able to take care of it. Super easy. Yes. So Rocket Money is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions

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And we're also brought to you in part by Airbnb. Dave, I love staying at Airbnb's. I've told you this before, my buddies and I get together twice a year and we always find some amazing spots via Airbnb. So, the other thing is maybe you've stayed in Airbnb before and you've thought to yourself, this actually seems pretty doable.

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So find out how much at airbnb.ca slash host. Fast times. Unisex raises its head for trim. Get ready boys. Cool. With their tempers honed and tongues dropped to a cutting edge, more than 100 men and women employed

in the tonsorial techniques. That's hair cutting. I really thought that was like kissing. Yeah. Cutting tonsils. Yeah, right, yeah, okay, yeah. Worked themselves up to a lather yesterday, debating a proposed law to permit the establishment

of unisex salons. Oh my god. The shops would serve the her suit needs of both sexes. Okay, so 72 and they still aren't allowing. But we deal with this a lot on a history show, obviously, where you're like, wow, I just never even thought about the muck that came from this moment where it's like,

I cut men and women's hair, it's like, over my dead fucking body. What you fucking saying? Say it to my face! Yeah, women have feathers. What are you fucking say? Say it to my face! Women have feathers. What are you talking about? You an idiot? But it's weird to have those two stores back to back

where you're like, oh, this is kind of very progressive that you could sue a lady for kissing you if you didn't want them to. And now we're like, they can't even have haircuts together. There will be no gender integration in the barber areas. Yeah. All the times yesterday's proceedings chaired by Secretary of State John Limonzo were Harry.

Nice. With a beautiful, culturist changing barbers, sorry, changing barbers to meet the challenge of the long hairs or cupping. Okay, that whole sentence is fucking ridiculous. This person is just sitting there with a thesaurus. I mean seriously. Going nuts. Going nuts. Hey, you know what, give this story to thesaurus teddy.

Yeah. Wrap it up, kid. It's gonna be a while. The idea that you're like, we now will call a woman to see if he can also cut her hair. Like, what are you, like the idea that there's a time of people like, it's totally different. That's how you get.

It's 72, what, minute long hair. That's how you get the VDs. What? I have had several male barbers tell me that a woman could not trim a beard. What? Yes, more than one has said to me, you can't go to a woman barber, they won't know how to trim your beard. My hair lady trims my beard.

Yes. They go like the different vibe, like sports clips whole thing is like, cute women are cutting your hair. I know they can't. It's a violation of the city law. I even pointed out to the guy, he's like, well, if she didn't have a beard, how would she know how to cut hair? And I'm like, does that, do you feel the same way about

sucking dick? And he's like, you got me. He was like, you got me. That always works. The only way for me to find out is for you to complete the bet. So my barber sucked my dick. And nature versus nurture. So the law now forbids men from going to beauty shops for any other reason than scalp massages

to stimulate hair growth. There's a lot going on. I mean, who the fuck allowed that loophole? Like, what just fucking happened? By the way, if you're gonna, like, I'm just thinking of the creeps. Guys allowed to go in, and they'd just be like, yeah, I just rubbed my skin.

Sorry, you whacking up under your smock. I also think of it like a speakeasy, like I'm here for the scalp massage, and I'm like, wait, take you in the back and cut your hair, but don't let anyone know that this happened here. Hey, Jimmy, it looks like you got a lady's haircut.

No, a guy did this, I swear to God. Those bangs? It is weird how to this day, though, how gendered barbershops and salons are. Like, I hate going to barbershop, though I was like, you want a shot of whiskey? I'm like, no, I want a beer trim. You need some porn? You all right, you want to watch porn? Let I'm like, no, I want a beer trim. You need some porn?

You all right, you want to watch porn? Let's watch a big game. It's ridiculous. What do you want to do? Hey, what do we start? Let's start divorce proceedings against you and your wife. I just want to hear a little off the side. Oh man, get away from the old ball

and chain for a minute, all right? You're a dick, huh? And yet, say, proponents of the contemplated legislation, most long-established barbers are not geared to cut long hair or styling. So let the fuck in this country, let the market decide. Right? I mean, why do you do like this?

I mean, listen, the America will have good haircuts whether the American citizen's like it or not. Is this before, you know, there's the craziest clip where there's like a, women wanted to run marathons and they wouldn't let them or women wanted to. Yeah, we did that. I feel like Crazy Clips is a great place to get married.

No, yeah, we did that. Yes. When was that? This would probably be. Around the same time. I would guess right around there. Maybe a little after, but right around there. Yeah, it's weird now that some of this stuff is like not even like, it just doesn't make sense why.

Like what's the problem? Like, you know. It's just people trying to like shed the era, but the old guard is like, a woman cutting a man's hair, now hurt everything. That's Anarchy, next thing you know, people be marrying baboons. Yeah, exactly, yeah.

That woman's gonna have a penis for a dough. It can't open this Pandora's box. Making a pitch for the unisex approach, Sal Manfredonia, owner of the Queen's Salon, I'm gonna show you guys Sal. Of course, I already picture him. He is, of course, everything. Hell yeah. I'm gonna show you guys Sal. Of course, I already picture him. Of course, everything. Hell yeah.

I was gonna guess some version of Salvador. Man for Donia? Yeah, yeah. Man for Donia. Owner of a Queen's Salon said most men are afraid to go to barbers these days because of the clipping they might get. Okay, so this is a time when dudes are starting

to wear their hair longer and he's probably right. Like the barbers are like old school, like you fucking long head and then they just go at it. That's crazy. Yeah, yeah. Wow. You're joining the army. But also amazing that like the country was like,

how do we avoid a bad haircut? This is amazing. He was shouted. He was cut down to size by an angry barber who shouted, you don't know what! You Queens motherfucker! Oh my lord. And where was this all being held? This is at, I assume it's in Manhattan, but it's...

An actual... It's a proceeding, the Secretary of State is overseeing this, it is such a big deal. Wow. What everyone seemed to agree on is that 70% of American men still prefer conventional haircuts. And then it says what they are, up the back, up the sides, and a little off the top.

You're all doing the same thing, right? Ha ha ha ha. There were three haircuts in 72 that you could get. Back, up the sides, a little up the top, wait a minute. As opposed to 25% who are wearing their hair long, the remaining 5% don't go to barber shops at all, which would partly account for the fact that there are now only 23,666 barbers in the state compared to 25,849 in 1964.

So there's 2,000 less barbers, and they're like, well, shit's dead, the old thing's gone. It's a hair demic. Wow. What's going on in this country? It is weird to think that some men were growing their hair along was the big controversy in the 60s. I remember like an easy rider, it's like,

don't they kill them because of that, basically? Yeah, yeah. No, yeah, and we're still trying to calibrate into like, how do we live in this new era? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, news fight to arm pilots. Oh, it's 2024. Oh my Lord. This is when they actually had like endless hijackings. Like it was just constant. Why were there more hijacking, less security? There's more hijacking for a while, right?

Yeah, in the 70s. This was like a dark time where people had a lot of issues. So people were like, well now we don't need them because Boeing basically self hijacks. So we don't actually need anyone to put anyone's life in danger from an outside source. We do it in-house. What's the fact when a tire came off a plane?

A tire came. Hey guys, things are fine. A nose dropped off. It was full. A plane had syphilis. Ha ha ha ha. Like people, there's no bolts in that wing and they're like, so you were mechanic? You know what you're talking about? You think the wing needs bolts, don't you?

The 460,000-member airline pilots association publicly endorsed the government's new anti-Skyjack regulations today. By the way, I Skyjacked in a bathroom. Everyone's on a plane. Whatever you want. That's the Arch Barker joke. I'm in a mile high club, solo aviator division. I think of that every time I jack up on a plane.

I think of Arch Barker. Every time. How often am I on a plane? How often am I on a plane? Have you ever jacked off on a plane? I've never jacked off on a plane. Oh, all right, well whatever. No, you've got to pass the time.

I'd be like, that guy was in there a long time and he didn't leave much of a sense. Just seats up, he was in there 20 minutes. He's just sitting there to see it, looking at people like, you know what, I hate his germs. A mascot. I jack off in the bathroom like a gentleman. I'm not an animal.

Hey, Louis,'m not an animal I bet you a majority of men jack off in the plane bathroom I have noticed that I get and we're getting into it now. This is a news show, but here we go. I get more boners on planes My fear has always been there's something to like the blood like the blood thin so I feel like boners on planes. And my theory has always been there's something to like the blood, like the blood thin, so I feel like, but I on planes, I'm like, even if I jack off before, I might actually start whacking off on the plane. But I get like, stop looking at me like that.

I get more hard ons while flying than any other time. It's funny because you hear, I've heard that people cry more at movies, but you get hard. I mean, I watch the book and almost read my gym shorts same sort of thing but it's that we think it's a uh... she become a pants compass uh... so they pick it up on radar

the parts of the ship i probably said it would renew its campaign to permit members to carry guns in cockpits. We are now at war with unknown criminals, said a source close to the association, which represents virtually all who fly the nation's commercial aircrafts. Handguns, of course, would be a last resort, but in the interest of total security,

they should be included in the measures to be taken by the airlines to stem air privacy, because what you want is someone shooting a gun in the airplane. It's like the worst idea, it's horrible. It's crazy, but it's also like imagine if you're like, what about teachers? They'd be like, teachers, so are you crazy?

That's insane. And I'm the guy who thinks pilots should have guns. That's crazy. Miss voters won't miss. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it.

I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it.

I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it.

I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it. Demali came to the aid of women's liberationists yesterday. He really should open a Demali place. If he's not, the place he's leaving on the field is ridiculous. Hey, what do you want, Demali Demali? He introduced a bill to repeal voting requirements that a woman must register as miss or misses Sacramento. Oh wait, sorry.

Sacramento County Clerk William Dudley said he had rejected 20 women who wanted to be registered under the title of miss. So MS period, they're saying you're not allowed to. I don't remember why women started using. Because I know why. Why? So you don't, it's none of your business

whether I'm married or not. Okay. It's Ms. and that's what it is. I'm not one thing if I'm married, not one thing if I'm single. I'm Ms. and that's none of your business whether I'm married or not. It's Mizz, and that's what it is. It's not, I'm not one thing if I'm married, not one thing if I'm single. I'm Mizz, and that's none of your business. But you might property either way. Just to be clear.

Don't you go in that barbershop, Catholic. Don't you go in that man barbershop. That's why they changed it, which completely makes total sense. It's none of your fucking business. Yeah, also a time when they were probably printing women's addresses in the paper. So they were probably like, look, we're trying to get a little safety around the margins wherever we can.

But it's awesome. Oh, you wanna be called Ms. Will You Not Voting System? Amazing, not voting. That's crazy. Just such a waste of timing energy, like who cares? That would be a good alt title for this country. A tremendous waste of timing energy. America colon, a tremendous waste of timing energy.

Come here, you'll find that there's stuff we should value, we don't. But now let's get into this hyphen debate. Should we be allowed to have them? I don't like it. Why don't we get me started on ampersands? Just right and, fuck face. A-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha- 26 year old cop, superiors almost from the time he, what this doesn't make sense.

John Ball, a 26 year old cop, superiors almost from the time he wore his hair long on his central park beat was dismissed from the force yesterday on grounds of insubordination. Wow. Okay, so. He wouldn't shave his head. He wouldn't cut his long hair. Isn't this late for this issue?

Wasn't this an issue in like 68? Isn't it crazy they're still talking? You know what I mean? It's crazy, but I bet it was just, I mean, I have no clue, obviously. But I bet you they were trying to stave off like the sort of hippie movement from the police. Look, you look like one of them.

Oh, cops are more record-based. We know you're a beat, Nick, we saw your pony tail. Yeah, okay. Yeah, it gets to the cops last. Yes, yeah. It's right through. We know you're a beat, Nick. We saw your ponytail. Yeah, okay. Yeah, it gets to the cops last. Yes, yeah, yeah. It's like the society and then now they're like, wait a minute, that's not who we are. Yeah, yeah.

I mean, where's this guy gonna get his hair cut? Who's gonna? Lay down, Todd, lay down. Oh, boy. Who's gonna beat you up, yo? Yeah. Yeah. I think he planted weed on himself.

I can't, I can't notice anymore. In a written statement, police commissioner Patrick Murphy said that a ball a policeman since 1968 has consistently shown himself incapable of abiding by the command system. Cut your fucking hand, ball! Murphy's statement added that a police officer must be willing to respond without belligerence to the orders of superiors. Cut your fucking hair, balls! Yeah. Murphy's statement added that a police officer

must be willing to respond without belligerence to the orders of superiors. Are we hearing about the greatest cop of all time? Yeah, it sounds really cool. No, fuck you. No. Gave girls a ride. What really finished Ball's career with the police

was a departmental trial last fall in which he was charged with giving a ride to two young women in a police car and spending time at a cocktail lounge while on duty in a uniform. I was on their cop just wanted to be this guy. They're like, we either gotta get rid of him or others are gonna try to do this. This dude had long hair and he's like, yeah, give me a ride, do you wanna go get a drink?

He's like, you're on duty. He's like, party duty. Do you ride. You want to go get a drink? You're on duty. He's like party duty. Do you have a picture of him at all? Oh no. Oh man, yeah. The incident could have been overlooked, Murphy said, since the girls were both crippled, what the fuck just happened?

Sometimes I feel so glad we get the comedy out right before the like, oh, shit. I did not know. Well, they can't walk. he's giving them a ride. Or he's hitting on crippled women. I don't know what it is. Either way, I mean honestly.

They're like, by the way, this would sound like civic duty. Yeah, well they can't walk, but they could drink and fuck. You know what I'm talking about? They couldn't walk, so I drove them. Yeah, cut your hair. I drove, you know what, if you can fuck a, you know what I'm talking about? They couldn't walk, so I drove them. Yeah, cut your hair. I drove, you know what, if you can't walk, I drive you to the bar.

Yeah. Just home, please. Do I get a drink? You're not good. So he said they were both crippled and had been unsuccessfully searching for a cab. But according to testimony at the hearing, ball dropped the girls at Central Park's Tavern

on the Green and then joined them there in the cocktail lounge. I honestly, that's a nice guy. Yeah, this guy's what cops should actually be. Oh, can you imagine? Yeah. Imagine. I'd have a fucking Blue Lives Matter sticker on my car. Funny, what do you want?

They're doing what we all want to do. Long hair, smoking weed with the disabled, come on.'re doing what we all want to do. Long hair, smoking weed with the disabled, come on. This is what we all want to do. Come back! This is what we all want to do. Yeah, it's a treat. But also, that's a nice bar, I mean, that's a nice bar in Central Park.

Yeah. It's not like some, the sound is like more skeezy before I knew the specific bar. Yeah. That's very nice. I don't know the bar, but I'm in. You have the right to whiskey and coke. Yeah. You have the right to shoot it. in a you have the right to whiskey and coke You have the right to shoot it

You have a right to another one The assistant man. Oh here shots fired shots drink Here we go. Here's the asshole in the story The assistant manager according to police records asked a ball to leave and when he, called the sergeant from his precinct. By the way, also, it's hard, okay, so if I was in modern day and a bar owner's like, get out of here, cop, I'd be like, this is a great bar. But now this is a cool cop. This is a cool cop and a lame bar owner.

Today, cool bar owner, get out, cop. Why are they, why would he ask, think about what a cop would have to do for the owner to say, you gotta go, right? Yeah. Maybe he just didn't want, it might just be that he didn't want to see a cop, he thought it would be bad to have a cop tricking uniform.

We just said the worst in every way, this country. It just, I don't even care, it's just, this is, come on. We can't even have nice cops. Yeah, no. According to testimony, Ball and the Sergeant had words and Ball refused to obey the Sergeant's orders. Murphy found that Ball had failed to live up

to minimal requirements of order, authority, and discipline that police work demands. It's great. I mean, this is a new, this is a TV show, Party Cop. Yeah, I like Party Cop, right? Yeah, you're Party Cop. Right? Yeah, you're gonna shame me if I've never watched it. Yeah.

Yeah. Christ. Kirk Douglas, Party Cop. What do we have time for? You don't remember that, Donald Sutherland? 45, okay. Volpe terms seven Skyjacks preventable. Well, that's your count on your last flight. Seven Skyjacks. Skyjacks Preventable. Well, that's your count on your last flight.

Seven Skyjacks. Skyjacks. We could have locked the bathroom. Yeah. That's why the pilots need guns. Because I just walk in as our jacking off. Louis Katz dead from the Seven Skyjack. Seven out of the last nine Skyjackings

could have been avoided if airline. I can't, this story will never get on track for me. I'm a little bit worried. I can't. If airline check and clerks had followed federal security guidelines, US transportation secretary John Volpe said yesterday. The guidelines are very effective when used.

We have absolute proof that seven of the last nine hijackings could have been prevented through their use. The guideline is a 15 point personality check off list. Oh wow. You would never make it on a plane. No. You'd have to be clear. You're, he's a lacquer guy.

First question, do you whack off? Oh, I see in his fucking eyes. Yeah. I see in his fucking eyes? I see in his eyes. It's a sky hijacking. Yeah. Is there anything? Is there anything? I'm Mr. Katz, please stop winking. I have some in my eye, unfortunately.

It's a question. The guideline, okay, so those fitting the profile are considered potential skyjackers and are determined in some way or another. This is where that dumb list of questions came from. Maybe, I don't know, I just remember when I was younger and you'd fly, now you have to sign the thing where,

yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm not bringing any bombs. But they used to just be like, and did you pack your case? Like internationally, you'd be like, oh yeah, and they'd be like, do you have any bombs? And you'd be like, no. And you'd be like, oh yeah, and they'd be like, do you have any bombs? And you'd be like, no. And you'd be like, people are failing this question, even hijackers?

Yes, I did, shit. Yes. Well, you ever fly, well, maybe you haven't. If you fly at all, or fly to Israel, they interview you in like a very intense way that I bet are these questions. And they ask you and they like add like weird dead space to make you anxious like to see how nervous you get. Do you have bombs?

No. I mean, I have materials to protect you guys. This pause is brutal. I'm telling you dude, it gets in your head. You're like, do I have bombs? I don't know. It's like it freaks you out. I don't know, you're so quiet.

I might. No, I remember, one of my relatives, like someone in my dad's family, when they asked that question, like one of the kids was like, as a joke was like, you do, as a joke. They were like, your flight is not gonna be made right this way, your life is over.

That's when I killed my child. Yeah, yeah. I can't believe how many hijackings were happening. Well, he said that, that's crazy. There's so many. Wow. Commenting on the recent change. The absolute abhorrent racial profiling that must have.

You think it's bad now. Oh my god. Back then they were like, bing, miss. Yeah. He's definitely going to do it. Commenting on the recent change in federal regulations that will make personality checks of airline passengers mandatory beginning this weekend.

Volpe added, don't be surprised if the regulation is amended soon to include the use of electronic devices at all boarding gates to cover concealed weapons. Oh, because they didn't have those at the beginning? Yeah. Oh, so there's no, so there's eight hijackings in the last few months and they still aren't doing metal detectors at the airport?

I don't think they had them yet, I think they're just maybe invented. Whoa, that's crazy. I don't think they had them, yeah. What a time. The use of electronic detecting devices called magnetometers, they're not called that, they're called, we didn't call them that by the way. And do you have any magnetometers?

And until this weekend, the personality screening test for air passengers were only suggested security measures, which some airlines- Don't hijack, because you really have to. So first question, are you weird? Yeah. Which some airlines carried out voluntarily at selected locations. I have to. So first question, are you weird? Yeah. Which some airlines carried out voluntarily at selected locations.

So this is what they have because they don't have metal detectors, we have several questions we like to ask you. Yeah, basically. Would a metal detector if it was ever invented go off because of you? You promise? Right this way.

God damn, they really know how to beat our questions. He was good. Okay, so this is a, would they ask a question and then they show the people's answers? Uh huh. Yep, people on the street. Uh huh.

Oh, cool. The question is, should a wife who learns of her husband's infidelity confront him or ignore the situation? Nah, I didn't let him go. Don't be a weird broad. Don't be rude. Nah, I didn't let it go. Don't be a weird broad. Don't be rude. Let him do it, because you should shut up.

You work for him in love. This is crazy. This is crazy. What do people say? Okay, so... I bet you're gonna fight a lot of men. No, it's only three, oh, it's one dude and two women. Okay.

And it's asked in Manhattan and Long Island City. So this woman, Vivian Dennis Astoria Queens. Ignore it. Of course she can never forget the infidelity, but it does no good to make a scene unless she is ready to divorce her husband. My advice would be to continue as she has been. Give him enough rope and he will eventually hang himself.

Speaking of hanging himself. You just gave him enough rope. Do that with your feelings. You're not a woman until you're dead inside emotionally now. Let him forget about it. Yeah, what are you gonna do? What are you gonna do? He's just fucking and sucking.

Man, male paradise back then. So I fucked your friend Karen, the beef isn't good. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha of course, fucking zip it. Hey, I've been fucking your friends. I'm gonna go to my home office and drink. Yeah. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Eddie Pepitone. Eddie Pepitone. So do we want to take bets on where this guy stands on it? I think I know. He's a young pep. I think I know where this man stands. If the couple has gotten along well and this is the first time such incident, the wife should ignore it particularly if they're children in the family. Why disillusion them?

When they would lose their respect for their father, there is nothing worse than children losing faith in one of their parents. It could ruin any chance for them to have a happy marriage when they are grown. Think of the kids. Think of what happened to this guy from the answer so specific.

Right, right, it's so specific. He fucked someone up. He's stealing us and shut up. You gotta put a cigarette out on both of you. By the way, as a product of a version of this, delaying it's not gonna help anything other than prolong the misery. Good advice.

There's a couple more. What do you think she meant by he'll eventually hang himself? Like, like he'll eventually. I know it's like a metaphor, but I'm saying is she saying that like, he'll just keep cheating to the point that it's I don't understand what you're like I'm cheating too much I can't do this look

eventually he's gonna bring home an STD and that's it he gives it to me okay there's actually more I didn't see them so well these are great. So, Miss Josephine De Bono of Staten Island of Staten Island, here we go. De Bono's holding me on. What do you mean ignore the situation? I'd throw him out of the house! Nice. That's the whole answer, that's it!

He's done awesome! I put trash out on the sidewalk and I do the same with him. Oh, this guy. That's awesome. Oh, this guy, this guy looks like, I mean, how do you describe that gentleman? Oh, God.

A serial killer. I don't know. Kill-Go murderer. He looks like an extra goon in a movie. Yeah. Yeah, he really does. Looks like a lethal weapon goon. Bruce Sullivan.

Well, he's more progressive. Like, he is, I would never, infidelity, not for me. I believe, honestly, the cheating is only manifested because of a lack of communication He's from tear park is a chauffeur She should confront him of course Kill him if you need $30. I kill him Of course, it would never happen. But if my wife were involved, I'd confront her

I want to find out the reason. Maybe it is my fault. If two people... This guy on the reporter is like, sir, are you okay? Adam had paid attention to Sheila! I mean, she has me to do a lot of tasks and I ignore her. She probably feels unloved. I need to go home. I'm not paying the hell out of my wife. Even if another man has been there recently. If two people are in love, it's best to get together and straighten things out.

If they are not in love, forget it. It's great. Perfect. Yeah, let's get it. Yeah, that guy's right. Does the paper give him like a sash and a crown? Who won the answer section of the paper? Frank Giordano. I got an idea.

If it is the first such incident, the wife should ignore it. How would she know it's the first such incident, the wife should ignore it. How would she know it's the first such incident? Exactly. So shut the fuck up. The first time she catches you, it's the first time it happens. Shut up. Jesus Christ.

And for the last time, a blowjob ain't fucking... That ain't cheating. Only holes is cheating and the mouth ain't a hole. If it happens a second time, she should throw the book at him. If there are children, this would be difficult because the children should not know. Everyone's so aware of the kids. All the dudes are like, the children are my caught out. Because my dad made me like this, you gotta be careful.

The one thing she could do is deny him the privileges of marriage. So he's saying she would stop fucking him. Oh, that's gonna stop him from fucking other women. That's just a marriage, right? Okay, yeah. Silly me thinking that was other things besides fucking. By the way, he definitely said fucking and they were okay, yeah. Silly me thinking that was other things besides fucking. By the way, he definitely said fucking,

and they were like, privileged. I'm just gonna put the mirror. That can actually work. We can actually still print that now. The legalese is out there. Anthony Bruno, Brooklyn. Oh man. Is it butthole or puss?

Oh, this is the, a wife with common sense would ignore it. Wow. Wow. And she knows what's good for her. A wife with common sense. Wow. There's no camera to look directly into when you're saying that, sir.

Better. She must know that a lot of men are so inclined. The children are the main consideration. Wow, men really veiling the children. I mean, all these guys are like, so I fuck around, that's what they're saying. I had a kid so I could cheat. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha that she has been faithful. She is crazy. That is crazy. Holy shit. So delightful.

Oh my God. If she gets upset about it, just be prideful that she ain't done it. Yeah, you're not fucking, so this is great. Yeah, no I'm just... Hey, look at you, you're good. Now I understand why the barber thing was such an issue. Yeah.

These were different times. Yeah, no, yeah. And we're fucking everything with a heartbeat, and then they're like, you go and get your handcuff from a guy? For the pain? Are you fucking kidding me? I'm gonna beat you with a meatball sub!

What are you talking about? That's about all any wife can do if she wants to keep her marriage from going on the rocks. It's on the rocks because you're fucking gonna lose it. Hey, we are what we are. Hey, think about the kids. By the way, the kids watch me fuck. That's a phenomenal section of the paper. I didn't realize how this use of the kids to blackmail, like that's like, what are you going to do?

Think about the kids. You love the kids, right? So I got to do whatever I'm fucking want. I didn't realize that was a technique. No, well, the reason to have kids in your marriage, obviously. I'm thinking of having them and now I'm home. I'm just going to scrape it off the airplane mirror. Put it back. Put it in airplane mirror. Ha ha ha ha.

Let's put it back. Put it in my pocket. Throw it back at me. Yeah, we know how biology works. Okay, crowd puller. Well I would read this one really quick and then I'll do that one. ABC's Wild World of Sports is branching out.

It will televised something called the International Bikini Sports Competition. It describes as a fulfilled carnival of young ladies. Oh. This is the sexist times, this is what this is. It is so hard to get your bearings on these gender roles in this era. Like, that is a shocking curve ball

to throw in this paper after everything we've gone through. This is crazy. Also, porn's now on CBS. Man. Crowd puller, Queens, an off track betting corp office opened in Belarus in front of a bus stop and now all day, long cars are parked in the stop and on the corners blocking crosswalks. People who wish to shop in the local stores

cannot find a place to park. Can you imagine the time when parking in New York is horrible? Is it New York? Yeah, it's Queens. Okay, then parking in New York is bad that it made the paper. You're not gonna believe this, it's actually pretty difficult to park in New York

Paper I just love the guys want to go to OTB so much of the just parking on corners. Yeah. Yeah, this will do I Just feel like this paper knows its market These are you know, it's others are gonna be bikini girls on TV. I'm betting over in Queens. Honestly, this is like newspaper maxim. Yeah, yes, yes. Hey, the best whiskey to drink while you shit. Every paper comes with a meatball sub. What? Oh, fuck.

Holy shit. Well, Louis, thank you for joining us. Hey, thanks for having a really uh... what's the special called again is called present tense on youtube you follow me on the socials it's at louis cats comedy l o u i s k a t z and i'm on the road is this come out when's it come out will put up with your next week i mean uh... colorado springs coming up soon and also going to be in uh...

in and arbor michigan'm also gonna be in Ann Arbor, Michigan, I'm gonna be in Cleveland, Ohio, I'm gonna be in Washington, DC. It's all, you can see all the dates on my website, lewikatt.stock. How you getting these gigs, you flying? Yes. Okay. And Skyjack if you will.

Skyjack, go away. If you haven't seen Louis, great joke writer. Thanks man. Great joke writer, highly recommended. If you haven't seen Louis, great joke writer. Thanks, man. Great joke writer. Highly recommended. There you go. All right. Well, thank you.

Appreciate it. Thanks for having me, guys. Yep. 1908. Always go 1908. That's where you do your magical voice. I just got surprised. Some of these days, you'll miss me, honey.

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