The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 76 - The Past Times with Randy Blythe (2)

Episode Date: May 24, 2024

Dave Anthony picks a newspaper from a day in history and reads it to co-host Gareth Reynolds. This week they are joined again by Lamb of God singer Randy Blythe Redbubble Merch...

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Look, as you probably know, I travel a lot. Too much? Sure, sure, that's fair. And on the road, if I ever have a choice between a hotel or an Airbnb, I always go Airbnb just because it's better. So for instance, when I was just on tour recently, there were a couple nights where I had off and instead of getting a hotel, I would get an Airbnb because I could have a kitchen. I like a home way over a hotel.
Starting point is 00:00:23 There's just a little bit more of a personalized experience. So whenever it's up to me, I really always go with that just because it's better. Feels like your home, you just have more amenities. But also I recently started thinking like while I'm gone, can I turn my place into an Airbnb? And the answer is yes, it can be as easy as putting your place up and then having a little more scratch generated from someone staying at my place while I'm on the road. So whether you could use a little extra money to cover some bills or for something more
Starting point is 00:00:51 fun, your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.ca slash host. All right, everybody. Welcome to the Past Times podcast. Each week we go through an old newspaper from a random date in history picked out by Dave Anthony. I'm Gareth Reynolds, and I've never seen it before, and neither is our guest this week. A legendary musician, he's an author, he's a philanthropist, he's a surfer.
Starting point is 00:01:25 And you know what else he is? He's patient with cats and a dynamite guy, and if we ever lost him, we'd find him with dynamite. The great Randy Bly joins us. Hello, Randy. Thank you, well done on pronouncing the name correctly. It's always been how I say it. I know.
Starting point is 00:01:40 Point me to evidence where I didn't say it that way. Well, you have pointless letters in your name. Yes. See, you know how Dave is on pronunciations. He will attack and Not respect. I mean I'm a prime example. It's it's yeah I mean, it's it's a setup his name's a setup It's a strange way to approach names and language isn't it Randy for someone to think that it's a setup Well, I mean wouldn't it make you think that a man's father maybe instilled him with some weird fears and odd complexes You're in a fucking kangaroo outfit that you killed. I didn't kill his dad his dad died of natural causes
Starting point is 00:02:17 strangulation all right now Randy promote at this point when this comes out. It'll probably be safe for you to fully promote your book. So why don't you tell us again about your second. It's a non-fiction book. It's coming out with Hachette, same editor. It's called Just Beyond the Light. And it's a book about different lessons
Starting point is 00:02:40 I've tried to learn from different people. Are we in it? You'll be in the third one. Is that a promise? But people like my grandmother, you know, who grew up in an era we talked a little bit about last time I was here. The Roaring Twenties.
Starting point is 00:02:54 The Depression. Oh, I forgot about that, probably. The downside. I also have a book coming out called Just Beyond the Light that's about the Lord Jesus Christ. J-Town. J-Town. Okay, have you seen this? Oh, J-Town. J-Town. Okay, have you seen this? Oh, J-Town surfing, fuck yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:09 Dave, would you take that shirt off and give it to Randy? Lord of J-Town, where did you get that? Someone made it and gave it to us. Oh my God, I'm so jealous. Well, Luke out there, he will gladly make you whatever merch you want. Okay. Yeah, we can make you one of these. Do you know the guy who made this and gave us the? I don't.
Starting point is 00:03:25 He didn't give us an email or anything, right? He just. I don't know. I have no idea. Because I like the, Well you must get a. He's surfing on a skateboard. Yeah, and holding the cross.
Starting point is 00:03:35 Yes. You must get a lot of stuff from, do you keep everything fans give you? No. Do you put it in like a room? I keep some things, because they're just so cool. Yeah, but some stuff you just go like, oh cool.
Starting point is 00:03:47 But there's just so much stuff. You get so much because you're also the lead singer of Lamb of God. And I'm a photographer as well, so photographers love to give me prints that they have taken and it's normally pictures of me. And they bring them to me on tour and I appreciate the sentiment, the thought,
Starting point is 00:04:10 the effort they put to them, but they're bringing me a 18 by 20 print of myself, which, yet another picture of me. How long were you famous before you started going like, okay, I'm not gonna start keeping stuff? I don't know if I'm famous yet or not. That's a crazy thing to say. But.
Starting point is 00:04:34 You do know you're famous. It was a subsect of people. How often do you get recognized? Pretty much every day. Okay, you're famous. Without the hair though, did it change? I mean, no, I got a little bit more, I was able to move a little bit more low key for about a week.
Starting point is 00:04:52 A week? Yeah, and then people are like, oh, you cut your hair. Yeah, see, and I would argue that that is what we call fame. I guess. I mean, I can go to Barnes and Noble without people mobbing me or something. Right, a bookstore maybe, yeah. I end up to Barnes and Noble without like people mobbing me. Yeah something right a bookstore. Maybe yeah Well, well get recognized when I'm bottomless. All right, so well, we're done with the intro
Starting point is 00:05:11 Officially well Randy. Thank you for joining us. You know the deal here. We're gonna Go through a newspaper, right? We don't know when it's from right, but we like to guess and you know what? You've been so good to us. You've been so good to us. You've been so good to the people. Normally I guess first, but please, you take the first stab. What year you think this paper's from? I think we need to go further back this time.
Starting point is 00:05:33 Okay, interesting. I think I've felt out Dave's psychology. You think you know him. In neurosis. Yeah, well there's a lot though. Whoa. He sucks you in to make you think you know him, and that's though. Whoa. I think we're gonna- He sucks you in to make you think you know him and that's when he strikes.
Starting point is 00:05:47 I think we're gonna go back to 1847! Wow, that's, okay. I like it. I like it a lot. Sorry, I had to yell. No, no, no, that's respect. I'm trying not to fanboy.
Starting point is 00:06:01 No, that's respect. It's like when people come up and when me doing that, I just realized, it's like when people come up, and when me doing that, I just realize, it's like when people come up to me in public and you scream my lyrics in my face. And you're like, I'm trying to, I just did that to Dave Anthony. I'm at Barnes and Noble.
Starting point is 00:06:15 I just did that to Dave Anthony. I just dollop Dave Anthony. You are on the podcast, so I'd be like if someone did it on stage. Well, that's true, that's true. Oh, by the way, we decided, we decided recently that I'm going to be the Lamb of God dancer.
Starting point is 00:06:28 Yes. So I'm gonna go on stage and I'll be dancing with the band. He said he wanted to throw meat at the fans. I told him he needed to get pumped up. But dance too. Yes. I'm pitching a lot of dancing. And yeah, no, you said there's a high bar.
Starting point is 00:06:42 There is. Well because you're pretty, you go for it a lot. Very physical. Yeah, very physical. A lot of jumping. But I'll be able to show you what I can do. And I think you'll be impressed. I'm excited to see it.
Starting point is 00:06:53 And I think you'll be impressed by this too, because I'm gonna guess that this paper is later than the last one. Right. And I'm gonna guess 1960. I can't really take you seriously because you don't have your paws on you talking to Randy. Please put the paws on oh I bet you there's a bunch of people out there who just hit the play pause button on the podcast now my paws are on The gloves are off the paws are on and by the way. I don't think they did these the right way
Starting point is 00:07:21 I've seen many kangaroos, and I don't believe they have absolutely did not They don't look razor sharp either. Well don't are there don't ask me. They're like this Yeah, yeah, they like to disembowel. Yeah dogs. Oh, I love to disembowel dogs the dog dies I'm a big Christy gnome guy Let the disembowel a um it is September 7th 18 92 It is September 7th, 1892. Randy still wins. I'm in there.
Starting point is 00:07:49 Yeah. You're a little bit further away than last time. I'm gonna get you on one of those. I don't think Garrett has ever won. I've won many, many times. Not once. And you've ignored many of them. Minneapolis.
Starting point is 00:07:58 Such bullshit. Minnesota, the Minneapolis Daily Times. All right, I'll be doing an accent for all of this, just so you know. Okay, it's your zone. Yep. Well, you betcha there, bud. Oh, dearie me, they brought some big news about us in the city today, I'll tell you that much.
Starting point is 00:08:17 Boodle and Blood. What? Boodle and Blood. They opened for you, didn't they? Yeah, Boodle and Blood. They for you didn't they? They did a whole tour yeah He's right brutal and I'm blood yeah It's just two guys yeah, German. Yeah, it's like a lamb
Starting point is 00:08:41 Yeah, okay, so tell me once again Buddha. Where did you go there? We went down to the shopping center to get sick? And Bassa figure conspicuously in the Garfield Park Raids. What's happened? Yeah, naturally. Garfield hits Mondays a millionaire horseman and two policemen killed and a question of veracity between the mayor and chief of police as to a big bribe. What's happening?
Starting point is 00:09:10 Truth, a question of truth in high-ranking public officials. I can't believe it. And this is the 1800s. Yeah, so it's your to boot on blood, I have to say about this. Is that strange? That's why they came to Detective Agency, Bootle in blood?
Starting point is 00:09:27 This is out of Chicago Changes everything Two dead men now they're Irish one of them a millionaire another mortally wounded and then open What a great way to describe it. I've been shot and I have a lot of money And an open question as to whether Chicago's mayor or its chief of police is a willing perjurer are today's results of the attempt to close the Garfield Park racetrack. Wow. That's where they race cats. Yes. The dead men are James Brown of Fort Worth, Texas.
Starting point is 00:09:59 Oh, don't feel so good. And then and then and then and then now I'm in wood. Then and then and then and then don't feel so good. Da-na-na-na-na-na-na. That's how they killed him. Now I'm in wood. Da-na-na-na-na-na-na. Don't feel so good. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! The dead man are James Brown of Fort Worth, Texas. A prominent turf man shot through the right breast and lower portion of the face.
Starting point is 00:10:22 He's a real turf man. Everything. He's a low turf man. Yeah. Super turf man the face everything real turf man Yeah, what is that turf man? I don't know they do lawns I think they take care of like roll out roll out. That's what I think yeah Yeah, he might take care of the it's a racetrack of the race that really what yeah, okay? They were trying to close it so he is like nope Yeah, right he though he might just be like a racetrack guy, like a turf manager. That's what they call it. Or he's territorial.
Starting point is 00:10:48 Oh, he could be territorial. I like that, really good last minute throw in. You know, you gotta, you find it. Are you? Each episode you find it. Are you a professional at this? I mean, is your question, am I in the podcasting hall of fame?
Starting point is 00:11:04 Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Is your question am I in the podcasting Hall of Fame? Yeah, yeah, okay, yeah I'm in Foff John Powell police officer shot through the mouth You're gonna get shot through something You're gonna get shot through something. Mouth. Mouth is bad. Oh yeah, I get.
Starting point is 00:11:26 It can go right through. Yeah. There's no other part of the body that the butthole. Stop talking. And start reading. The butthole. I just want that to be on your mouth. Consider the butthole.
Starting point is 00:11:39 Don't Ted talk. If it went through the, straight through the anus. So what, you're a cartoon doctor? If it made a swish, it would still. What's happening to you? The front it would come out would be really bad. You don't know how the human body works. It would be really bad.
Starting point is 00:11:53 And that's coming from me. If it went through the butthole and came out the front it would be bad. Now sideways through the cheeks. Stop. It's gonna be fine. Might miss a tooth or two after you're done. No, you're the guy who was just coming at me?
Starting point is 00:12:05 Yeah, but I... You're the guy who keeps starting every sentence with the butthole? But again, I didn't... Who wouldn't though? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Yeah It's just Dave picking up over in a yeah Kind of yeah, yeah I was on Kimmel our next guest Dave Anthony author of consider the butthole We're not sure how this guy ended up getting here. I'm reading a cue card. What the hell does it say? Harry McDowell a police officer was shot in the abdomen probably mortally wounded It does not pass through no no
Starting point is 00:12:51 That's a bad place to get very painful. Yeah, both the officers fell before Brown's revolver one being instantly killed the other dying Before he could be removed from the grounds so that the guy got shot in the mouth is dead it sounds like it Yeah, you got like that's what I was picturing you guys are like. It's going through the cheek. I'm picturing That's just a headshot. It sounds like they didn't update the story from the last sentence no I already printed that one. It's down What are we gonna do delete it? 1850 who killed Brown is not known 1850.
Starting point is 00:13:25 Who killed Brown is not known. Nobody actually saw the killing of Paola McDowell, and when Brown was slain, a dozen officers were firing at him, including McDowell, who, notwithstanding the fact that his life was ebbing fast, raised himself up on his hubbo and fired repeatedly at the man who had laid him low. On his what? On his elbow.
Starting point is 00:13:45 So he got shot, he's laying down, propped himself like a movie, propped himself up and popped a couple off, and then died. I'm a turfman. Yeah. We don't go down without a fight. He's on his elbow, he's got his gun up, and then. Yeah, okay.
Starting point is 00:13:58 Then he perishes. He shot me through the cheeks, goddammit. And then a horse. He shot me through the cheeks. And then a horse just ran over him. No! God damn it and then a horse Then a horse just ran over It was shortly after three o'clock when the police commanded by inspector Lewis appeared at the gates To make the third raid upon the park Wow
Starting point is 00:14:24 That's a lot of yeah, it's a lot of really want to shut this fucking race down, but how do you like or qua? How do you like doing an underground race track like it's massive? Yeah racing? Sounds like you got horses in there Not just a bunch of Dutch dancers, sir, I promise there was no delay gating admittance and seven wagon loads of officers rolled rapidly down the track toward the grandstand a Panic sees the people in the grandstand at the sight of the bluecoats and men and women made wild breaks for Liberty Oh, so this is like illegal. Yeah. Yeah, yeah Panic sees the people in ours what balls it takes to set up a racetrack awesome and be like I'm gonna have fucking racing
Starting point is 00:15:06 Yeah, Betty like there's nobody's gonna know into it. I mean so it must don't tell anyone you were here Everyone who's here it must have been legal then they made it illegal right? But then the horse people are all just like we're gonna still do it. Yeah, we're doing right. We're bootle and blood god damn it How do you think you're gonna get away with it? I don't know cops money talks bullshit walks have we heard who bootle and blood bootle and blood are the guys who were shot Oh, I don't know. Okay, the police paid no attention to the fleeing spectators But quickly surrounded the bedding ring and the judges stand All the officials of the track who could be found were quickly placed under arrest and a detachment of officers Was then sent to the stables to gather in the grooms and the jockeys. That's right. We're arresting the horses and the men who wrote them
Starting point is 00:15:55 We need a weird set of handcuffs for this one. We bought the junk get the jockeys The grooms the brides can go get the grooms the jockeys Yeah The grooms the brides can go get the grooms the choc is Small handcuffs yeah, yeah, yeah, just a tiny cell brings a mini party wagon out all right look We can stack them too high Attention was then turned to the people who scattered over the grounds singly kill them Yes Singly killed him Yes And a numerous got squads were making their way toward the exit only one man who was too fat to run was captured
Starting point is 00:16:40 They just walked up to buy I need a minute to flee. May I have a moment before I take off, officer? That is like a, that is one of those, you would just never see that in a paper today, even if that was true. Too fat to flee. Too fat to flee. I give up.
Starting point is 00:17:02 That's his book title, too fat to flee. Well I would have run 70 years ago. Fun fact, I was running. 70 years and 90 pounds ago. I was running when they caught me. As the officers approached Jam Brown, the wealthy turf man,
Starting point is 00:17:20 owner of Bobby Beach CW Johnson and the sensational two year old, okay so he's the horse owner of Bobby Beach, C.W. Johnson, and the sensational two-year-old. Okay, so he's a horse owner. Okay, the sensational two-year-old. Threw me. I was like, whoa.
Starting point is 00:17:31 Threw me for a fucking real loop there because I was a sticking horse. It's a sensational child. Yeah. All right, sit down. Three card monties the game. You've heard of the terrible twos. We have a sensational two.
Starting point is 00:17:44 A sensational two-year-old and other first-class horses Was standing upon the roof of one of the stables watching the policemen pursue people oh wow With him stood Bob Rice another well-known racing man Bobby Rice mm-hmm Brown they repeatedly said during the former raids around right around right Yeah, nicely done, Brown Rice. Okay. Hey, you wanna hold hands? No.
Starting point is 00:18:12 Brown had repeatedly said during the former raids on the park that he would allow no man to arrest him as long as he had not violated the law. He doesn't know how police work. Yeah, I don't think that's his decision, to be honest. He doesn't know how police work. Yeah, I don't think that's his decision to be honest. He doesn't know how police work at all. And if a policeman attempted it, he would kill or be killed before he was dragged to the police station.
Starting point is 00:18:37 He knows how it works. I guess he did his thing too. Powell and McDowell approached the shed and the former hailed Brown pleasantly who asked him to come down. What for? said Brown. Excuse me sir. Sir. May we arrest you please?
Starting point is 00:18:52 No. Oh, suit. I got a whole thing where I said I wouldn't be arrested and I'd kill or be killed. This whole place is illegal sir. Let's try it again. Pretty please. Would you pretty please?
Starting point is 00:19:06 No, it's not good. I'm feeling I have to start killing people. Beesh. What for is it, Brown? I'm trying to get out of here as fast as I can. That guy. Hey, I got to, why did we all chase the fat guy? I've been caught.
Starting point is 00:19:23 What for, said Brown, so that I could arrest you, replied replied Powell I'll not come down and I'll not be arrested said Brown Kirtley at the same time tossing a few pebbles from the stables gravel roof upon Powell's head Small rocks. It's so demeaning. Those actually hurt a little bit. Come and get me. Blink. The officer then ran around to the rear of the barn and placing a board against the wall
Starting point is 00:19:55 quickly clamored up to the roof and advanced towards Brown. Oh shit. Oh, Brown's not gonna like that. It's like the end of John Wick. Yeah. Officer McDowell had by this time passed on and brown What passed on does that mean McDowell's dead dead, but who shot him probably Brown no, but Brown hasn't been shooting Maybe the pebbles were really hard
Starting point is 00:20:22 Dead by pebble yeah and Brown Death by pebble. And Brown sprang to the ground and walked rapidly toward a gate opening from the grounds upon 14th Street. So he jumped off the shed roof. So this is like a Spider-Man type guy. Yeah. Parkour. Powell followed closely after him and Brown began to run, paying no attention to the repeated calls of Powell that unless he halted he would be fired upon. Brown ran into the fat guy.
Starting point is 00:20:51 Take me with you. May drag me please. As no attention was paid to him, Powell drew his revolver and sent a bullet whizzing through the air just over Brown's head. Powell drew his revolver and sent a bullet whizzing through the air just over Brown's head. That was enough. Brown instantly wheeled around his revolver, flashed in the sunlight, and he fired and Powell fell forward on his face. Well, shit. Dead. He's not messing around.
Starting point is 00:21:17 I know. Starts with pebbles. Uh... Come on, Chubby, we're outta here. I didn't do anything. He came down as though struck by a thunderbolt. Or bullet, I mean also a bullet. Yeah, why, exactly, truly.
Starting point is 00:21:32 It was like lightning hit him. He was shot. All of a sudden, he stopped. We're not sure why just yet. Blood began spurting from his head. Like thunder. As if Thor himself had struck them. Like thunder had hit his forehead.
Starting point is 00:21:48 Blood deluged from the man. And not a movement of the limb showed that he had known what had happened to him. He didn't really wasn't doing like, yeah. The questioning, like, whoa, he fell pretty weirdly. Like something changed. Without placing his revolver in his pocket, Brown fled rapidly along 14th Street. McDowell here in the shot. OK, I don't know what.
Starting point is 00:22:11 So McDowell passed on. Didn't mean he died. He must have run past or something. OK. McDowell here in the shot had run out of the gate and seeing the form of his companion lying prostrate in the dusty street and the form of Brown going rapidly up the street he'd once started in pursuit. He was a strong athletic fellow. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. Look at him go. Oh he's not like that fat guy at all. I can hear you. We can still hear. And he gained upon Brown in a way that convinced the fugitive that if he continued in the open street, it meant his capture or a fight for his life.
Starting point is 00:22:51 He darted into a yard and vents around the side of an unfinished house. McDowell's but a few seconds behind him and instead of... This is so well written. It is well written. It's actually... Yeah, you are actually... I'm on the edge of my seat. I mean, yeah, back then with the paper, you're like, holy shit.
Starting point is 00:23:07 Yeah. This is an unbelievable ring. This is the top story of the year. This is like Pulitzer Prize winning report. So he started around the side. McDowell was but a few seconds behind him, and instead of following Brown, he turned around the house in the opposite direction, and the two men came face to face
Starting point is 00:23:23 in a narrow passageway between the house and a high board fence McDowell made no effort to shoot Brown but grasped him fiercely by the throat and ejaculated. Wait, what? It says ejaculated. Things just got real weird. Oh! This is what I've always wanted! What?
Starting point is 00:23:48 That's why Brown was not going to be carried, taken alive. You will not jack off on me! It's a great move. I should have paid you! The cops are not shooting you, they're just jerking off on you these days. We're gonna shut down this race track! I'm not gonna lie, that was the last thing I expected.
Starting point is 00:24:06 Now I came on ya. And he grasped him fiercely by the throat and ejaculated. Stop eating it. I've got you, I've got you now. So he said it. Ejaculate. I've got you now.
Starting point is 00:24:25 Ugh. And then he slept and hugged him. Ugh. Ugh, I'm so tired. He bore his man. Let's make some popcorn and I'll nap. This is the most sexual thing. He bore his man back against the fence.
Starting point is 00:24:38 There you go. You want another round? Exceedingly. This guy knows what he's writing. This is a definitely homoerotic, like, it's like the penthouse forum column. They're slipping into the regular paper. At the same time trying to hold Brown's arms so that he could not raise the revolver,
Starting point is 00:24:58 which he still held in his hand. Don't shoot. Oh, I shot. Brown struggled desperately, but he was in the hands of a man who was more than his match, held in his hand. Don't shoot. Oh, I shot. Brown struggled desperately, but he was in the hands of a man who was more than his match and he could not break away. He then endeavored to raise his revolver, but the strength of McDowell frustrated his efforts.
Starting point is 00:25:16 He then pushed the weapon against the body of the officer and fired. Shit. With a cry of pain, McDowell fell back back clasping his hands over his abdomen, through which Brown's bullet had bored a ghastly hole. By this time, a dozen officers were close at hand, and as Brown paid no attention to their demands to surrender, several of them opened fire upon him. McDowell, who had managed, McDowell, who had been writhing upon the ground, managed to raise himself up. On the elbow.
Starting point is 00:25:46 On one elbow. And with a determination to even up matters with the man who shot him, opened fire from his revolver. Brown could not escape. He was surrounded on all sides. And before he could raise his revolver to protect himself, a bullet crashed through his right lung and another tore away the jaw
Starting point is 00:26:04 and the lower part of his face He's crazy man, but I think that I think the raising yourself up on the elbow is bullshit I do make the cops look at yeah, I think it's like some sort of like No, he was on the ground No, he was on the ground The word this article was incredible, but he wrote ejaculated and it just ruined everything it really did He took I mean it's really well made everything. Yeah true. That's a fair point for me. It took me out of it a little bit He jizzed I ever get shot yeah, no matter what happens. I'm gonna raise myself up on one elbow Yeah, I think I'm gonna think about this moment. I think I like the move. Oh, that's first of all
Starting point is 00:26:51 That's a little very nice of you Think about this guy to kangaroo. Yeah With the J town. Yeah sure It would be great if you were if you were shot for your last act to be just trying to whack off. Have some respect for yourself. I'm getting one last one out! Alright, let's just shoot one off real quick. Get him from the elbow.
Starting point is 00:27:17 That hurts so much. It's not a very big load. One second! I jerked off earlier! I should point that- just die! I should point that I jerked off earlier. I support that. Just die. I support not a jerked off earlier before we came out. That's why it's tiny.
Starting point is 00:27:31 Take a little time. Take a minute. Minute. Give me some of that water. He'd be doused it. This last ball had struck him almost exactly in the same spot as he had shot Powell. He fell to the ground and turned half over in a weak attempt to rise again, but he.
Starting point is 00:27:51 To his elbow. Yeah. But he had not the strength. And as the officers came running down the narrow pathway, he tried once more to rise, but it was only a convulsive movement of the limbs. And an instant later, he was dead. From what? Teregulosis. Thunderbolt. Consumption. Yeah. Thunderbolt. Okay so taking on the Morgue blah blah blah
Starting point is 00:28:15 James Brown was a man with a record. Yeah many records. I can sing many of them. Great ones. And if McDowell dies, he will be the 14th man who has gone down before his revolver. I guess. Ever? Oh, maybe cops. Before the... Before 14th cop. Oh, okay. Brown was born 52 years ago in Kansas, but moved to Texas while a boy,
Starting point is 00:28:43 and then it goes up here to the... Has since then made his home in that state. He was for 10 years the sheriff of Lee County. Wow. And it said that all the killing he ever did was in an official capacity. I like that. Yeah. I've only killed only efficient only business. Gentlemen off the record. We go off the record. Yeah. but yeah, I mean a couple of times on the weekend I killed for pleasure off the record I got a few more bodies on but yeah I shot a dog and a goat in a gravel pit He has been interested in the running Turf for the last 25 years and was generally regarded as a square man
Starting point is 00:29:23 He had amassed a fortune on the turf and his estate is estimated at over $1 million. Oh shit. The turf man is profitable. It's interesting, yeah. So I mean, he just didn't wanna be arrested for being at the racetrack. No, he's not having it.
Starting point is 00:29:41 I mean he really was. He is from Texas. Yeah, yeah, okay. It was probably gonna be a hefty fine, yeah. They don't enjoy being told what to do down there. No, they don't, no. No, they definitely don't. Even when it don't make sense.
Starting point is 00:29:53 Yeah, yeah. Trying to help you. And my freedom! The Chief McClanaghy said of the tragedy that it confirmed his determination to close the park. Look. No shit. Well, what are you talking about?
Starting point is 00:30:08 What is he gonna do about it? All right, it can stay open. He tried to close the park, they kill you. Yeah. Means we need to close that damn park. We gotta get that fat man outta here somehow. Far from making me change my mind, it confirms my decision.
Starting point is 00:30:21 If police officers cannot enter the park and the discharge of their duty without being killed It is time the park was closed. I mean that is such a funny thing for them like people want to watch races Gamble we don't like that. I'm sending the cops you die Well the fact that they've killed all these officers confirms that we are actually gonna have to shut it down Dangerous for the police so we're making the move. Wow, that was really crazy. That I think is our longest opening article. It was really, I've listened to a lot of these and that was actually edge of the seat. Yeah, well you're an author two times.
Starting point is 00:31:00 Well usually you start reading a long article on here and then you stop because it's like okay It's getting really like what's happening right now, but this was really well ready except for the That's the best part This has a bunch of headlines One by Dixon the black man made a monkey The black man made a monkey of Skelly. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. In eight rounds, the Brooklyn lad was clearly outclassed.
Starting point is 00:31:28 Terrific punishment. Inflicted upon Skelly while Dixon was untouched. Oh, boxing. Yeah. The second of the Olympic Club's pugilistic events, a hard fought battle. So, the white guy got beaten up by the black guy. That's what they're saying. Okay, right What year was this again eight eight man that must have been hard for them to take 18 and 92. Oh, yeah
Starting point is 00:31:53 Oh very upsetting one. Oh, yeah, and where was that? This is in New Orleans Well Think the culture down there is a little bit more intermingled. Yeah still I think the white It wasn't great. Well. It wasn't great. Yeah, the whites well the whites that's My book the fight tonight in the Olympic Club Arena the second of the high-priced attractions provided for public entertainment and test the endurance of this class in fistic firmament. Fistic firmament. Oh man.
Starting point is 00:32:31 That is, yeah, go ahead. Whenever you're ready. That gives me ideas. Time to partake of the fistic firmament. It sounds vaguely religious and pornographic at the same time. Yeah, well I like religion. With a contest between black and white
Starting point is 00:32:48 in which public sentiment nearly all in favor of the Caucasian and the public. Surprise, surprise. I wonder why. You're in the deep south. And the public betting nearly all on the side of the African. That is so.
Starting point is 00:33:04 We know what we want. Yeah. But we don't know reality. the All the pictures there of the white guy, and they're fucking hilarious. That's the bike oh Are you that's beyond colorblind gareth? I? Can't see my can't I got kangaroo eyes. I don't see color Refused to Both men stood high in their class and yet each was a representative of a class Dixon had up to this evening fought innumerable series of winning mills in professional ranks While his worthy opponent had equally as spotless a record in the amateur contest
Starting point is 00:33:51 One had experienced cleverness and gameness the other was known and highly rated for skill dog determination Do to do or die? Wow And that continues on The weather was warm. What a weird. In New Orleans. They like to throw in the weather a lot. It's a nice day. But the throng was like all good natured crowds that gather here as it was different in one respect. Ordinarily there's not a blackface to be seen in the arena. There you go.
Starting point is 00:34:25 It was like all normal, happy. Just as normal. Oh yeah, just matter of fact. We know black people. In New Orleans too. Well also, I mean, the black fighter must have been like, Jesus Christ. I mean, you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:34:37 Like as he's fucking wailing on this white guy. I mean, if you're... Are they saying that there were, there were black people? Yeah, they were Yeah, there's black people in the audience. Yeah, which never happens, right? Yeah, right I if you're a black fighter at this time, you're like do I want to win? Yeah winning is losing to This could be a little dangerous
Starting point is 00:35:03 I don't know what's going on. He's stronger than I thought. There was a crowd of them tonight in the gallery. One of the stars tonight was a black man and the club acceding to the natural desire on the part of the black element to witness the engagement set aside a space for them. Okay, so they gave them a place to go. Yeah, sure. We could have said that a place to go. Yeah. Sure. We could have said that a lot.
Starting point is 00:35:26 Probably not the best seat. Should have been very comfortable. No, not at all. The black brothers did not come in large numbers, but he took, he took. Can you imagine? Yeah. Like we're gonna go see our homie
Starting point is 00:35:41 maybe beat up a white dude. I'll take a pass. Do you wanna go? No, I'll probably stay here, but good luck. I've looked at them, I think he's gonna beat the shit Our homie maybe beat up a white do you want to go? I think he's gonna beat the shit Come with me is there a runaway section Emergency exit yeah That's second he's on the ropes like I'd be like we should get the fuck out of here, so outy
Starting point is 00:36:12 Let's see They took a deep interest in what went on and felt a pardonable pride in the representative of pardonable pardonable prize a lot of pardonable pride What a way to put it with you like oh you're allowed to have a little pride Little pride Chief of police gaster sent a squad of policemen to keep the black contingent in order That's not that's fucking that is not who has to be worried. Yeah, of course
Starting point is 00:36:46 Now watch it now. Yeah, you're too hard. Don't get too excited for your boy, but be careful. You might get racist Treat the white people with some respect. We've been through enough in this country How dare you? But he did not have much to trouble himself with for the crowd was was terrified Quietly watching much to trouble himself with for the crowd was was terrified. Orderly, yeah, as orderly as that. Very quietly watching. Hit him, hit him, hit him, hit him. Tonight the same excellent police discipline was preserved as here, Tofore and
Starting point is 00:37:18 New Orleans generally does have excellent police discipline. It's true, yeah. And the crowd was handled with the greatest of ease. I believe it continues in the next one. Yeah, you're trying to wonder what would make the crowd more riotous. Would it be the white guy winning or the white guy losing? It would be the white guy losing
Starting point is 00:37:42 and the black audience cheering. Cheer, yes. That would be the white guy losing and the black audience cheering. Yes. That would be it. Right. If the white guy loses and the black audience doesn't do anything, then it's okay. I think it's acceptable. Okay. Because remember, they've all bet on the black guy.
Starting point is 00:37:58 Yeah, right. Right. There's that. Money. Money talks. Big important component in this country. I think that's probably exactly what happened. Yeah, yep Yeah, they were quietly like yeah, we're quiet. Oh, no
Starting point is 00:38:10 Awesome, let's out by us a lot of beer The knockout blow was a pile driver stroke plum before the neck There is some in the neck Knocked you out by hitting you in the neck. There is some in the neck son. Yeah, neck blow. I knocked you out by hitting you in the neck. Oh, brutal. Just right in the carteroid. I would watch more boxing if there was just, if you were trying to hit the neck more than anything.
Starting point is 00:38:35 He's really working the neck tonight Ted. He can't breathe. He's crushed his esophagus. Anderson's neck is really swollen. He looks like a python swallowing an egg There was some difficulty in detecting just which of half a dozen blows which Dixon slather on the face He had so many times. I don't know which one killed the white man, but it was in the last dozen Was the one that put Skelly to sleep so rapid a merciless was the rain of blows that it may be said a bunch of punches knocked him out.
Starting point is 00:39:09 Look I can't figure out which one. He hit him about 12 times in three seconds. We're not sure. There's no replay. He was dead at one point and then he kept going and then he was down. Blood was dripping from two breaks on his face down upon his breast. Dixon's bronze skin was dyed red from his opponent's blood. Oh my god. Skelly's eyes rolled wildly and his lids shut and he reeled to the earth. One, two, three, shouted the referee, counting the seconds. They really made the beginning sound like it was a much closer content. They were like, both fighters brought a lot to the table, but then at the end they're like,
Starting point is 00:39:46 but only one man could be covered in the other one's blood. The other man got fist fucked by the, it fist fucked his face. This was truly a fisting. The fisting firmament, the firmament of fisting. At the count of three, Skelly lurched forward upon one knee at the same moment, lifting one arm above his head He's in it yelled the crowd, but the crowd was wrong
Starting point is 00:40:18 The blood-covered boy who had forfeited his amateurship Amateurship for this reeled as he tried to force the other knee to act, tottered a moment and pitched headlong to the earth. I mean, the one knee trying to get up with your one hand in the air. Bruh, bruh. I'm okay. I'm okay.
Starting point is 00:40:40 I'm just trying. I only got punched 40 times. neck my next scene better days the the gloves were probably not the highest. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah Yeah, no they were leather yeah, it's probably worth for you. Yeah So on to ten went the count of the referee But the prostrate youngster had not moved when a thunderous shout went out into the night air. He's dead. Knocked out, yelled the crowd, and none louder than the 200 black folks
Starting point is 00:41:12 in the gallery assigned to them. Oh, okay. Wow. Dixon had stood with his right arm drawn ready to bring down the prostrate fellow should he succeed in standing up, so he just waited there. He's just waiting. Don't get up. Please. Don't get up please don't get up at the count of ten however
Starting point is 00:41:28 He dropped his guard and when Skelly had been bodily lifted to his chair He went to Skelly's corner and offered to shake hands Skelly did not see Dixon's offer and the latter picked up Shelly's hand with His glove and shook it oh Formality he's like dad. He's out. He's done. He picked up his head And shook it. Oh, that's the formality Dixon then turned and tripped over to his corner where he was joyously received by his trainers and backers the Boston Youngster had maintained the Bantam championship won a purse of 7,500 and a side bet of 5,000. Wow, he made a lot of fucking money. So he was from Boston. So that's insult to injury.
Starting point is 00:42:14 Yes, it is. A Yankee, a black Yankee comes down and whoops your fucking ass. A fucking blankie kicked your ass. A blankie, nice. The young Brooklyn amateur fought a game battle and that is all that can be said he had done. The funeral will be Saturday. Well you tried.
Starting point is 00:42:36 Please send flowers. He showed fight while Strank was with him and only gave up when nature gave out. He was fighting until he got his face fucked up. He did really well until he was murdered from gloves. Until his teeth were laying all over the match. I'll tell you, he was the best fighter before the match. Before they rang the bell, it was amazing. Before they rang the bell, that kid had a hell of a match.
Starting point is 00:42:59 He's a hell of a kid. The Boston Bantam's generalship was much admired, and his strength and hitting ability were considered something wonderful. At the end of the battle, The hell of a kid. The Boston Bantams general ship was much admired, and his strength and hitting ability were considered something wonderful. At the end of the battle, a challenge from Charlie Mitchell to the winner of the Sullivan Corbett contest was read and Hartley laughed at it.
Starting point is 00:43:16 Wow. What happened? That's just a different fight. So he challenged someone, and everyone's like, ah, good luck. Nearly every other fighter at the ringside wanted to fight somebody and police captain Barrett ordered all the challengers out Wow Still ready to fucking keep going yeah, that's a great. That's great. Especially the $5,000 bet yeah, you like to see that yeah That's great. That's I mean he made a lot of fucking yeah fuck yeah. I mean
Starting point is 00:43:45 You're talking twelve thousand five hundred dollars back then yeah, it's like fourteen thousand As someone in the entertainment business here we go We got to think about manager. Yeah, I think we go booking agent right about the local venue That's right. It's true. I don't think they had merch then. Might have been selling merch. Oh God, wouldn't it be amazing if they had merch? I told you I'd knock that asshole out. Fumigated at Chicago.
Starting point is 00:44:17 Fumigated? Two carloads of immigrants held up and disinfected. Oh, fuck me. Disinfected. Fuck me. What, it's fine. It's going normal. It's normal, you guys.
Starting point is 00:44:28 No, this is not good. Two carloads of immigrants from New York over the Pennsylvania Road. They're from New York. Oh man, I like that a lot more. Yo, the big city. Hey, what are you doing? Get out of here.
Starting point is 00:44:41 Gas them, boys. Yeah, de-stink them. We're halted 20 miles from the city today, and both cars and passengers thoroughly fumigated before being allowed to proceed. Holy shit. So these are people from New York, but were immigrants. Yes. So they landed at, like, Ellis Island or whatever, and then they came over and then they came to Chicago.
Starting point is 00:45:05 No, they could have just been living in New York. So this might have just been regular, like Brooklyn. No, they may have been immigrants living in New York. Right, but it didn't matter Chicago. Yes, yes. You know immigrants will re-stink even after acclamation. The immigrants were in good condition and had been.
Starting point is 00:45:22 Oh my God, like they're Pontiacs. And. And. What the fuck? The immigrants were in good condition and had been... Oh my god, like they're Pontiacs! And... What the fuck? Good interior on some of them! Wait... Better fumigate them, just in case. And had been fumigated in New York, but additional precautions were deemed necessary. What the fuck?
Starting point is 00:45:39 Oh my god! Seddis, you're hungry? They were going to Chicago. To Chicago. Known for its delicious smells. Somewhere in Ohio. We think they may have picked up some bugs. We better spray these boys down one more time.
Starting point is 00:45:56 Fucking A. Here's what it is. No. A close watch is being kept on grand trunk trains for immigrants who are supposed to have escaped the Sarnia quarantine. Oh, okay, okay. I don't know what Sarnia is.
Starting point is 00:46:11 I think it's in Germany. Sarnia sounds like Narnia. Yeah, like Narnia, but. 200 persons from the infected. That makes it a little, I feel better. Do you? I mean, a little bit. I'm sure that they were like inventing a lot of this
Starting point is 00:46:26 I mean, I never heard of Sarnia before so they were like yeah, it's called Sarnia Sarnia. Yeah, Sarnia Yeah, I mean a lot's changed in that area like as far as what country is what? Since then but Sarnia. Oh, this is Canada. That's can't be right. I see I'm pro spring I think we should be a gay Canadians. I said that and I'm like Pray those motherfuckers. Yeah. Well, we just came in from Edmonton get him Yeah, it's this is Canada. So maybe it's Canada. I'm proud of this Although it could it could also be the same name in Germany because I'm proud that in Deutschland Yes, Sarnia. It's a good fume again. Yeah, oh no I do believe it's I do believe they came from
Starting point is 00:47:10 Canada Yeah, let's go. I'm with that. Yeah. Yeah, I think they came from but we actually just got a few mcgated up there in New York So we were thinking instead for tat Unfortunately the way we fumigate Chicago is a little different so bend over and spread them We're spraying Come on there bud. That's really not careful. I'm gonna ejaculate So what's going on? I'm gonna ejaculate in a minute So here I am ejaculating
Starting point is 00:47:38 You say it like that is very upset. I've got something to say I'm gonna ejacaculate. No. On these Sarninians. I'm gonna ejaculate all over these Sarninians. 200 persons from the infected districts of Germany disembarked from the Steamer Kremens at Montreal and as only 80 persons are now being held at Sarnia it is feared the others may have made their way into this country. So they're Germans through Montreal. Through Sarnia, Ontario. Right, right.
Starting point is 00:48:11 And then down to America. Down to America, and that's when we double fumigated. I am crawling. And they got fumigated from the quarantine, which isn't scabies. And by the way, I would love to know what they fumigated with back then. Right? Oh. Some sort of proto- then right? Yeah, just like some sort of pro DDT
Starting point is 00:48:27 Yeah, oh my god Agent orange spray him until there's a new eyeball on him boys. I Definitely now I'm going to have our booking agents booking agents book us a show in Sarnia though. Yeah, you should Well, I'm part of the I don't know I mean I am part of the band well I'm part of your end. I'm part of the year. I'm part of the state. I'm dancing You're the sixth member of my day. I dance on stage. That's the new that's the new They call me jam of God jam of God. Yeah, I'm up there. I do moves. I find it in the kangaroo costume Yeah, why are you so pissed off?
Starting point is 00:49:02 I just think about is that you're kind of It's like stolen valor the money my boss tones guy Yeah, why are you so pissed off cuz you're not part of the band? I'm not pissed off, all I'm thinking about is that you're kinda... It's like stolen valor of the Mighty Mighty Boss Tones guy First of all, I base it all on the prodigy guy. The Mighty Mighty Boss Tones dancer stole it from the prodigy guy. The fuck he did. The fuck he did. Boss Tones was first. Are you out of your fucking mind? The Mighty Mighty Boss Tones was first? What's the next story, dickweed? Back to the Chronicles of Sarnia. He killed two men.
Starting point is 00:49:32 That's the headline. Is it? I hope so. A bartender uses his gun with deadly effect. Wow. That headline should come back. Yes, I think so too. Having dated several bartenders
Starting point is 00:49:46 and seeing what they have gone through, I support it. Yeah, I agree. Yeah. Frank Hook of West Duluth kills Mike Haggerty and mortally wounds Jack Murphy. What is the difference? What, between Jack Murphy and Mike Haggerty?
Starting point is 00:50:02 No, between killing and mortally wounding. I don't think there's a. So why what's the differentiation? Just one man dead another man mortally. Well, I'm out today Yes, yeah, right slower death. Yeah. Yeah, okay instant death versus like a bleedout Is from West Superior Frank hook a bartender shot and instantly killed Mike Haggerty and mortally, you just did that in the headline. Yeah. They didn't tip them. Yeah, right?
Starting point is 00:50:28 Yeah. And mortally wounded Jack Murphy at West Duluth while in front of a saloon tonight. All had been drinking and quarreling, Murphy has a 38 caliber ball in the abdomen and cannot live 12 hours. Wow. You don't know that?
Starting point is 00:50:44 Come on. They can't tell that. They barely know what's happening with any medicine. But also, this is like at a time when news does not travel at lightning speed. True. So who knows what time the person actually wrote that story. He's gone. Yes.
Starting point is 00:51:00 Yeah. Tune in tomorrow to find out if he actually died. And he did Hook escaped he is supposed to be hiding in the marshes this side of the bay and the police are looking for him How long can you hide in marshes? Whoa, you're just waggy. Yeah Yeah, it's no wetsuit. Yeah, you're not gonna last long. You're gonna start pruning real soon. Yeah, he's he's fucked Well, good luck boys. Yeah, Godspeed Godspeed who I also am always so thrown off by when you could, like, with the laws of shooting people, like, you could kind of shoot people.
Starting point is 00:51:35 Yeah, sometimes. And then you just kind of couldn't. Well, you could. Delia, this time. Stand your ground, boy. Yeah. But like, if you're a bartender, you'd be like, I had to. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:51:44 But I guess the bartender was drunk, too I mean there was a long time when if your wife cheated with a guy you could legally kill the guy I think that should come back. I Can't take you seriously. You're a kangaroo This is so fucking ridiculous. I mean my I've been through we've been through so much to be taken seriously, and you just sit here, and you just Say stuff like that was this 1991 I'm a guest on your show
Starting point is 00:52:13 Have some fucking respect This is just a want ad okay. What I want a wanted Wanted yes Yes. By a girl. Oh no. Respect! No. Wanted by a girl? Bodily autonomy.
Starting point is 00:52:30 To be able to go to the post office without being harassed. How are you spelling by? By. Okay, that's a relief. By a girl, a home with some old old childless Christian people living in the city. Scandinavian preferred. Oh, Christ. Old, wanted, childless Christians.
Starting point is 00:52:54 So she wants... So... No, wanted by a girl a home... So this is a... In the city... With... Old sweets? Old Swedes, old, yeah, old, old Christians, we. Yeah, yeah, that's what we're looking very specific. Yes, it's a fetish.
Starting point is 00:53:15 You can find you can find this today. Old I'm looking for a Christian Swede. Old Christian Swede madeup, you know dp Edward w Bok the book editor of the sunday times is going to marry the daughter of Lydia pinkman Pinkham, sorry. Apologies, Lydia. Shout out to the cat, Lydia.
Starting point is 00:53:48 But Mr. Buck wishes it understood that he does not marry his mother-in-law nor any of her recipes. What the fuck is going on? What? What is happening? I'm a marrier? Publicly.
Starting point is 00:54:03 Publicly suggesting. I do not like that girl. She is a shit cook. She is a shit cook. The paper started off so strong, and now it's tweets. He is going to start life for himself and find out what is the matter with the family as he proceeds on the journey.
Starting point is 00:54:23 Wow. What in the hell is wrong with these people? I must find out. matter with the family as he proceeds on the journey Hell is wrong with these people I must find out Marrying in I'm gonna investigate their culinary disaster of a family unit I Mean that kind of perfectly describes marriage though. And what? It really does. You get married and you learn what's wrong with the family. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, he's like, oh shit. And then you start going like,
Starting point is 00:54:50 oh that makes a lot of sense. Yeah, that's a lot. Oh, that tracks. Oh. So he, okay. That's where that came from. Okay, right, right. Crazy Sense the Cure.
Starting point is 00:55:10 Okay. A Dwight graduate attempts to murder an entire family. I went to Dwight. Did you hear the rest of it? No. Attempts to murder an entire family. You completely missed the headline because you got, somebody got caught up. I heard the headline. No, you got caught up on Dwight somehow and missed the murder of the family go ahead do the family I mean who gets tripped up on Dwight well he said I graduated from Dwight sounds like a
Starting point is 00:55:32 team you'd find out in March Madness is like boy Dwight made it way for nobody had Dwight in their bracket a Dwight graduate attempts to murder an entire family Charles W Lewis a graduate of Dr. Keely's Institute at Dwight, this afternoon shot at and attempted to kill his wife, baby, and sister-in-law, and then blew out his own brains. Oh, for fuck's sake. His poor aim resulted in his sister-in-law, Mary McGigan,
Starting point is 00:55:59 being only shot in the hand, his wife in the thigh, and his baby unscathed. How did you? The baby is the easiest. Oh man, if you can't shoot a baby. He don't deserve a gun. Not an American. Maybe it was one of those deep fast babies.
Starting point is 00:56:13 I can't believe he, yeah. I can't believe he even managed to kill himself. Did he? You missed the baby. Yeah, yeah he did. Hold still baby. Did he think he mortally wounded all of them? He's like, now that I've taken their three lives
Starting point is 00:56:26 I can't do time for this All right, well the baby's fine. I'm hurt a little bit It's good thing he's gone Lewis has been drained since he took the cure the cure for our modern That's a good question. It could be they they used to give them All sorts of weird shit to treat alcoholism like Belladonna and oh, okay wait the cure, okay shock treatments the other for impotence
Starting point is 00:56:57 for impotence They don't work. Yeah, you need electricity We're gonna need 20,000 volts one.21 gigawatts through your dick. You're going to be hard! You're going to be hard boy. The shock. Stiff as a board. The shock.
Starting point is 00:57:14 So I can't get hard. Well what you need is more electrical current running through your body boy. That's what you need. Yeah, so this was in the Victorian time. 10,000 volts, how's it feel now? Yeah, this was for masturbation, gonorrhea, sexual excess, and constant excitement. So that electricity can cure most ailments. Of the genital organs. So wait, so you get shock treatment if you get hard too much Yeah, now where are you?
Starting point is 00:57:47 You ain't getting hot you know hard too much come to me. He could have been hard too much I thought you said he he he received it the cure for why I'm just saying this this is considered the cure I thought actually he was like his wife was complaining. He couldn't get it. That's what I He was like his wife was complaining. He couldn't get it. That's what I Baby, yeah, yeah, so we zapped the shit. It was also complaining. They couldn't get it up We shocked him some doctors introduced Galvanic baths or bathtubs filled with electrodes which were supposed to restore sexual desire just six sessions others Took it even more localized approach Where rods and currents running through them were placed inside the man's urethra?
Starting point is 00:58:35 It's not worth it. Oh, no Just be had go on hikes. Yes, just be a eunuch the second someone is putting an electrical rod up your dick hole I mean that doc imagine it like that time Just be a eunuch. The second that someone is putting an electrical rod up your dick hole. I mean, imagine it like that time. Do you know what you're doing? No, not really. Boy, you got a really small piss hole, boy. Let me jam this up here.
Starting point is 00:58:57 Get ready. This is going to be the worst thing that ever happens to you. But it's going to get hard after. You're going to want to shoot your baby. This was thought to be particularly helpful for those with significant atrophy to the genital area. Oh, you got what we call lazy love. Lazy love, boy.
Starting point is 00:59:18 Fuck me, god damn it. There we go. Worst story ever. All right, let me just jam this rod in your piss hole. Cock shocker. Yeah, the cocker, yeah. Brutal. Wire up his balls.
Starting point is 00:59:35 And imagining back then, that was fresh out of another guy's dick. There we go. So this one's juiced up from Lenny. Got a little pus from Lenny on it. Yeah, we got a little bit of the Lenny juice on it. Don't worry, that's just gonna make it gliding a little easier. No, I don't need to wash it. Now, what's your problem?
Starting point is 00:59:53 It's getting too hard or not hard enough? Don't matter. There you go. More votes. Let me just take your temperature the old-fashioned way, boy. There you go. It's an old fashioned way, boy. There you go. August Strindberg, the Danish poet,
Starting point is 01:00:10 is famous for his hatred of women. Imagine being famous for hatred of women in this time. Oh man. Like other people have been like, look, I agree, they shouldn't have rights, but chill the fuck out. It's aggressive this aversion seems to be uncontrollable at times and often leads the author into difficulty Wow
Starting point is 01:00:35 He must have really been letting it rip. Oh fuck you woman. I like he needs a much shock treatment Not long ago he happened to meet a lady at a friend just have some pie friends and taking hold of her oh no through her from the veranda hold of her. Oh no. Threw her from the veranda. What the fuck? It's a woman! Alright, well there's more coming so we should probably figure this out pretty quick. And now I will write a eight line poetic verse. This has been a really strange hang. Consider the woman. And now my latest poem. She stood a fuck woman. She was on the verandah. Not that kind of fuck woman. What rhymes with verandah toss?
Starting point is 01:01:30 I demand her never to see her again. Her name was Miranda and I demand her to throw her out the verandah. The poor woman who was injured brought suit against the ungallant writer on what grounds? ungallant very ungallant He was condemned to pay the plaintiff 115 golden And 200 golden at cost of the proceedings the case has cost much talk in Germany. Yes Fuck a through a lady Lady off the veranda and she was hurt
Starting point is 01:02:13 Okay, fine. Well, he does hate women. I mean the poet well listen I just my art. Yeah, this is my art. I this is what I did. I've put a lot of material from this moment This is my art. This is where I put a lot of material from this moment. Jesus Christ. Well, shit. That was a workout. There we go. You have one more small one?
Starting point is 01:02:31 No. No. All right, okay. Well, you can't beat Ferandah Toss. Ferandah's the way. That's right. Randy, thanks again. Thank you.
Starting point is 01:02:40 This has been the best. Come back whenever. Oh, I will. Whenever you're in town. And lamb-of-god.com for all your tour dates. Our tour dates. Yes. I misspoke. And Dave, I think the best way to end this
Starting point is 01:02:56 is for you to say something from the heart to our guest. I don't like Gareth. It's a really, really crazy thing. You had an option to say anything and that is crazy. Oh, we're bonding No, I don't I don't like this fun Well, Randy Bly thank you for joining us Again it's just super weird. Do you guys enjoy my J-Town ornaments? Yeah, the fact that you bailed us. I did. I still have it. It's right out right out. When you asked for our address, I was like, I don't know my computer. It just sits there and with the cake. Dave holds it up sometimes
Starting point is 01:03:38 for taping and things like that. So yeah, no, we appreciate it very much. All right, well, and excited to read your new book. It'll be out soon after this comes out. So, all right, God bless, everyone. Thank you. Some of these days, you'll miss me, honey. Some of these days. Look as you probably know, I travel a lot. Too much?
Starting point is 01:04:06 Sure, sure, that's fair. And on the road, if I ever have a choice between a hotel or an Airbnb, I always go Airbnb just because it's better. So for instance, when I was just on tour recently, there were a couple nights where I had off and instead of getting a hotel, I would get an Airbnb because I could have a kitchen. I like a home way over a hotel. There's just a little bit more of a personalized experience. So whenever it's up to me, I really always go with that just because it's better.
Starting point is 01:04:35 Feels like your home, you just have more amenities. But also I recently started thinking like while I'm gone, can I turn my place into an Airbnb? And the answer is yes, it can be as easy as putting your place up and then having a little more scratch generated from someone staying at my place while I'm on the road. So whether you could use a little extra money to cover some bills or for something more fun, your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.ca slash host.

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