The Dollop with Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds - 9 - The Pendragon of Marin
Episode Date: June 23, 2014Dave Anthony and Gareth Reynolds discuss the Pendragon of Dave's hometown in 1982.Tour DatesSources Dollop MerchPatreon...
Transcript
Discussion (0)
When you're staying at an Airbnb you might be like me wondering could my
place be an Airbnb and if it could what could it earn? You could be sitting on
an Airbnb and not even know it. That in-law sweet guest house where your
parents stay only part-time Airbnb it and make some money the rest of the year
whether you could use a little extra money to cover some bills or for
something a little more fun. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find
out how much at airbnb.ca slash host.
Well you wanted me to start with... Well you've been giving me shit about the way
I start the process. Well let me take that back and say that that's for what
you just did. Not the old test. No it's just because you're not gonna talk like
that during this. How do you know? I mean that's just gonna be really hard for me
to deal with if that's a voice. It's the news with Dave and Gary. That's not even the name.
It's called the news with Dave and Gary. No and my name is Garif. God you love the
D train don't you? Yeah it's a great train reliable D. He's got a shirt. Yeah he's
got a shirt. You ever live in New York? I've never lived. I was there. So you don't know shit about the
fucking D train. You haven't let me answer the question. Yeah I've stayed in I've
ridden the D train not wait daily. Not daily. No. Alright so it's not that
reliable. Taking the one. I mean it's reliable. It's a reliable train. There's gonna be
problems with it. Of course like any train. Slow as the fuck down over the bridge.
The bridge is crazy that time of day. Okay so a little update. Sad update. We learned
after we did the Dolphin podcast that the Dolphin killed himself. Which is crazy. I mean Dolphins
to live they have to swim up to breathe and if they and if they just go down to the bottom and
sit there they're they're ending it. It's like they're drowning. It's their version of blowing
their brains out. Yeah that's them drowning. So he killed himself. I get why he would kill
himself but it is sad. It is it's horribly sad. Yeah just some guy in LSD got a lady to jerk him
off and he was like this is the best thing he ever did. Chick loves me and she has hands. It's
like when Michael Jackson had dropped a kid off from Never Never Land or whatever the fuck was
called. Yeah. You know the kid would be like where's the roller coaster and all the cake and the
guy who molested me. Well not that bad. Well the guy in pajamas. The guy in pajamas. He shows me dirty
movies. He gave me wine in a coke can. I hate the rules here. Nothing wrong there. Nothing wrong.
So RIP. Do you know how many people believe he just didn't do anything. Michael Jackson. Yeah I'm
looking at him up. Too many. Too many. Too many for all the words that have been said. Yeah too
many. Well have you ever heard the the rumor. I mean the rumor that I heard that made me go like
oh that makes a lot of sense was that his dad got him basically turned him into like a eunuch
when he was a kid. So he like removed Michael Jackson's like genitals. So he would sing that way
forever. So he would sing that way forever and it just made him really strange. That's a great
rumor. Yeah. That wouldn't make someone weird. No. No it wouldn't. Game of thrones. No I don't think it would. That's
easy to get over. Just don't shower after gym with the other guys. I don't have balls. Well
Charlie's got tits. Where are your balls Michael. Charlie's got tits. Yeah that's it. Little locker room
resin. Charlie's got tits. Okay so this story it's something I remember from when I was in high
school. Okay. And it took place when I grew up in Marin County. All right. Now for people don't know
that I know where that is and what that is. It's just north of San Francisco. It's where the Golden
Gate Bridge goes. So if you've seen Planet of the Apes where the apes go that's Marin. The mayor was
not happy that day. Oh no. It is it's known for being beautiful, very liberal and very very very
rich. Just like you. Yeah. Super rich. I was like I was like one of the poor kids and we lived in like
a three bedroom house. Right. You know. Yeah. Okay. It has the fifth highest income per capita in the
U.S. Wow. All right. Yep. And I think only two there are only two counties outside of Washington,
D.C. that in the top seven. So it would be us Beverly Hills Marin County Beverly Hills. Jesus.
Two. All right. I might be wrong. It might be Silicon Valley now. The Civic Center was designed
by Frank Lloyd Wright like it's just a fucking ridiculous place. So that's where all this took
place. We've had serial killers. You know, we've done all we do the normal stuff too. Sure. You
know what I mean? We had the Mount Tam killer. Yeah. We do all that. We're not total fucking weirdos.
Yeah. But in the 70s, we were known for hot tubs. I think hot tubs were like invented there or they
came into their own there. The idea of someone inventing a hot tub is really funny. Mountain
bikes were invented there. Okay. And and then for some reason peacock feathers associated with
Marin County, they were invented there. I can't really come up with a reason why just so many
peacock feathers. Like when I was a kid, my dad, my dad's a part of the native sons of the Golden
West. I can't. It's very upsetting. But they for one year as a float, they had a hot tub and they
were just like in a parade, like a town parade squirting water out of their peacock feathers.
And I was I was supposed to walk along beside it like like I'm some kind of little Egyptian slave.
Wait. Hold on. Sorry. Just real quick. Yeah. So what was your dad a part of the native sons of
the Golden West? What is that? That's like an Elks Club for guys from California. All right.
Okay. Yeah. So they were in a parade and they made a float. The float was a hot tub on a truck
bed, a hot tub. And they the hot tub was it's probably the old hot tub, the old wooden right.
Sure. Sure. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's empty. So everyone's just in there. They look
like they're in a hot right and they're just squirting water out to make it look like the hot
tub parties. Yeah. Yeah. And then you and you and I had to walk along beside now. I don't remember
why but that was my duty. I would assume it was my duty because my dad was like, well, you can't
ride in here and I got to keep an eye on you. So that's do the math, David. I would love to see
footage of you walking alongside that float. Oh, I must have been super happy. Oh yeah. I
bet you looked really happy and not confused. And now we get into today's story. Okay. Called the
Pen Dragon. Pen Dragon. The Pen Dragon. Pen Dragon. I don't know how to say it exactly. Okay. You'll
see where this goes. Well, it's a Welsh term. Oh, well, look, it's on my doorstep now. On July 13,
1982, Richard Baldwin's body was found floating in San Pablo Bay. Interesting start, David. Right
into it. Okay. Right fucking into it. The Bay has been made famous by Primus who sing about fishing
out there. Oh, yeah, sure. On the sea of cheese. That's all about San Pablo Bay. Okay. A tugboat
operator found the body wrapped in a plastic tarpon and a bamboo screen. Okay. Wait. Okay,
so. So wait, he's wrapped in tarp? Yeah, a tarp. And bamboo screen? A screen. A bamboo screen. So
am I thinking, are those the screens where people would change behind? I don't know.
It's very Marin. Bamboo is really hot there. He would dump a body in something like a bamboo screen.
Run pandas. Yeah, probably something someone would change behind. Or you could use a bamboo
screen like on a window, you know, like roll up. Sure. Could be that. Right. But that's what,
okay. But either way, we're not calling card in a way. It's like a murder calling card.
But if there was like a TV cop show, they would go, well, we're not dealing with professionals.
Yeah. Or they'd be like the bamboo killers back. Somebody's moving and didn't want their old
curtains. Oh, there's a guy in there. He was bound at the neck and ankles with television cable.
Oh, Christ. He was the end rope and he was duct tape and he was weighted down with a small
outboard motor of a boat. So that seems very last minute.
That's that's the like aquatic kitchen sink and the boat motor.
It was almost like they were playing dress up with the corpse.
He really bound him with a lot of different items too, right? Yeah, they were really tape
and the TV cable. Yeah, rope, duct tape, TV cable and a boat motor and a boat motor.
And we're done. Wrap him in that bamboo screen. Let's get out of here. But the hilarious thing is
that after all that floating, yeah, floating, they're like, God damn it. What do we have to do?
Okay, the dead man was 36 year old Richard Baldwin, who was an owner of a vintage auto
restoration shop called Classic Car in San Rafael. Okay. San Rafael's like the main town in Marin.
Alrighty. The left side of his skull was fractured and he had been stabbed in the heart and the head.
Right? Yeah, right. Yeah, that's no good. Well, good. Do you want to argue? A college student
who was working for a Mr. Mark Richards. Sure.
Was at his place in Mark Richards garage and noticed that a safe had been punched open.
Okay, quote unquote punched open. Sure. I feel like not actually like not actually punched.
Yeah. No, that's his broken into a maintenance college student. So he's like,
hey, bro, someone punched it in, bro. You got crazy fists. Dude, crazy fists. Someone punched it in.
Richards was a friend of Baldwin and he was a home renovation contractor.
All right. And he had two employees, Crossen David Hoover, who we'll call Crossie.
Well, we'll wait. And Andrew, who we'd never learned the last name of. Okay. So Crossie and Andrew.
And they were all there and Richards explained that the safe had been given to him by a person
who he'd done remodeling work for. So he went in and redid someone's house and the guy said,
just go ahead and take the safe. Right. Well, that's payment. Yeah. It must have been around
the holidays. He's like, what? So here's the, I don't know how much work he did or what it was
worth, but that safe you can take and whatever's in it is yours. It's kind of, that's, let's make a deal.
Yeah, I did some work and a guy gave me a safe to break into. He couldn't pay me. So apparently
there's a lot of shit in that safe. So I get that now. Hopefully nobody punches it in. I'm going to
take that safe home and we're going to find out what's in it and I'll find out what I got paid
for the job. Oh man. Crumpled up newspaper again. God damn it. I should just start taking the real
payment. I gotta, I gotta start working with money instead of these magic boxes. Honey,
did you get, did you get paid? Well, I got good news, bad. You didn't take another fucking safe,
did you? I did. I got one more safe. I got a good feeling about this one though. This one's going to
come through baby. God damn it. Jacob needs medicine. Well, there might be medicine in this safe.
You'd assume in this safe is a champ bag full of medicine.
Other fellow employees came forward and said they heard Crossy boasting that
he had clubbed and stabbed Baldwin to death at the auto shop on July 6th.
So I feel like that's, that's counter to what he's saying. I feel like we're starting to put
this together. This is a big piece of evidence. I've, and I feel like these guys are not criminal
masterminds. Right. I like bragging. Bragging and leaving evidence just out. So guess who stabbed
someone in the heart and brain today? Was that you? That's right. What do you guys want to do later?
Hey, I might sleep. I'm a little tuck it out after stabbing a guy's heart and head,
head, binding him and putting him in a bamboo screen. What? I threw a boat motor. What? What do
you? What? Should we get beers after work? How do you want to know? No, no, I'm going to run away.
Hey, wait, hold this boat motor. So three days later, Friday, July 16th, investigators, 7am.
So they had already, so they found the body in the middle of the night on the 13th and by Friday,
three days later, 7am, they're kicking in the doors. Like not a hard case.
Police forces from Santa Fe and San Osama, where I grew up, and the Marin County Sheriff's
Department, so they got everyone involved. Yeah. Arrested Mark Richards, age 29, and two 17-year-old
boys, Crossy and Andrew, as they were leaving Richard's house in Sleepy Hollow, where I grew up,
literally the valley I grew up in. Sleepy Hollow? Sleepy Hollow. So Hoover was interviewed first,
and here's a quote. I've been stupid. I should have gotten the cash before, so I could have taken
off for Brazil or someplace. I don't want to hurt the man. It was all money. All I wanted was $5,000
in the car, and Richard's got my mind so sacked up that I freaked out and I did it all. Just put me
away. Okay, so he's... These guys are not smart. He wanted $5,000 in a car real bad though, Dave.
He had his heart set on it. Right? Super. He had to kill him. Well, yeah, but how else do you get
a car in Marin? $5,000? You kill a guy, and then you get a nice, shiny new car. Think of how much
it would take for you to kill a guy. Oh my god. Like, what would I kill someone for? Would you kill
someone... Would you kill someone for $5,000,000? No. I wouldn't. I don't think I would. What about
for $50,000,000? I think I'd kill the guy. I would kill someone for $50,000,000, but they'd have
to be a bad person. Yeah. It couldn't be... Like, you couldn't just be like that old woman over there
and go kill. I'd be like, oh gosh. Really? Yeah. Really? Yeah. No, I couldn't. I don't know if I
could do it. I mean, you think about it. What would you... Well, I would walk up to her first and I
go, do you have cancer? Excuse me, miss. Are you about to punch your safe in? I'm about to punch
your safe in. Oh yeah, coming to my house. These guys are punching my safe. Yeah, somebody punch the
safe in. Okay. So, Mark Richards was interviewed by police shortly after the arrest, and he
denied any involvement in the murder. I like this angle. Of his good friend Baldwin and offered an
account of whereabouts on July 6th that was completely implausible. Like, the cops were like...
Wait, he didn't... I couldn't find out what he said his excuse was on July 6th. His alibi. Yeah,
the murder happened on July 6th. Oh, so where is he? And so he was like, I was flying a boat. Like,
he came up like the worst... I ain't been in a new blimp. I was inside of a frog friend. When we
get to the end of this, you'll realize probably how implausible his idea was. He told sheriffs
that the kids... Okay, he didn't want the kids to take the rap. He said, and I quote,
the poor kids, I mean, I should take the fall for this, not them, okay? You know, like, if somebody
is trying to take down the blame, you know, for anything, it's me. And then the cop goes, why
should you take the fall? Well, you know, I understand what it must look like, okay? And all I'm
saying is these kids, you know, they don't have... They wouldn't have anything to do with anything
like this. Dick didn't owe them money or anything like that. And then you're... What would you...
I'd be like, well, you're a murderer. Also, what do you mean they didn't know your money?
Oh, oh, okay. So he... Okay, so I didn't do anything. Right. Here's the deal. Okay,
I'm going to break this down for you a little bit more. Okay, so what happened was Baldwin
used my credit cards, okay? And so he owed me money. And so I used his credit cards.
And he was like, okay, that's cool. He said... He said, hold on. He said, wait, he stole my
credit cards. And then I was like, okay, I'm going to use your credit cards. And he said,
that is fine. You guys switched credit cards. Yes. Why didn't you just say that?
Okay, so he... No, don't say okay anymore.
But he said, he said I could do it. So... And he also said I could rob his house.
Really? Well, yeah, it's like... Did he say you could murder him?
You know when there's like a credit dispute and like the bank takes your stuff?
Yes. Okay, it's like that, except I'm... I'm Mark Richards. He's James Baldwin.
Let him go. Let this man go. For God's sake, he's good. Let him go.
I can imagine the guys, the cops must have to... Like usually you watch a TV show and it's like
trying to break down a criminal. Yeah. This is 98% of them. Yeah, I know that. And then,
yeah, then there's these cases where you're just like, well, that's really obvious. He did it.
I didn't do it, but I got his shoes on because he said I can have his shoes and I don't know why
there's blood on them. Dumb, dumb. He's like when you... DVR law and you're like, why is it four
minutes long? Okay, so at the time of the murder, Richards and Hoover and Andrew were remodeling
Baldwin's home. So, coincidentally, these three guys who have all bragged about killing him and
have the evidence were also remodeling his place. All right. Hoover said that Richards and he had
lured the victim into the auto shop on the pretext of looking at his inventory of classic cars.
When Richard scratched his head as a prearranged signal,
Hoover slugged Baldwin on the head with a baseball bat. Oh my God. Okay. No, but I just love...
Stop clam. I'll ask him if we can go see his cars. I just... Okay. Hit him with the bat.
Okay. Wait, what do I do again? So, I'll go show me your cars. Uh-huh. He'll go, okay. I'll scratch
my head. Hit him with the bat. Okay, say it again. Slow it down. Every part of this has to be a part.
Okay? This is important to go this way. Slow it down so I get it. Okay. Yeah. I'm gonna say to him.
Okay. Go shoot. Let's show us your classic cars. Okay. I'm gonna itch my head. Yeah. You're gonna
fuck him up with the bat. Okay. Where are you gonna itch your head? My head. But where? At any part
here. What if the other part of your head gets itchy? Okay. Fair question. I'll itch the front of my
head. The face? The front of my head, not the face. The head. The top. The top of my head.
I love that they planned it. You don't need to ask him about the cars. Oh, no. Don't even go into the
cars. Uh-oh. So, he hit him with the baseball bat and then he hit him three more times after he
fell and then he stabbed him with a knife and a screwdriver in the head and the heart, which to
me is so he hit him three times so he's probably out and then he stabbed him in the head and then
he put that thing. Maybe he got stuck. Yeah. Maybe he got stuck and then he grabbed a knife or it was
just dirty. Or it was like this. Maybe the screwdriver was like so-so. Yeah. Give me that knife. Give
me that knife. I'm sick of this shit. Afterwards, he and Richards return to Baldwin's home where
Andrew have been standing guard. None of that makes sense. Nope. He's standing guard at a different
location. What if Richards comes home there? Oh, Rich. No, Baldwin, you mean? Baldwin comes home
there. But they're killing Baldwin. They're with Baldwin. Still. What if he itched his head? Okay.
Think about it. No, I get it. Uh, and then they removed the safe and other property. No, no, no.
They were given the safe. Right. And then they took their payment. Baldwin gave them the safe.
They wrapped the body at the shop and used a boat. Richards had just purchased that evening.
I mean, wow. To deliver it to what they hoped would be the final resting place in the bay. Yeah.
The police believe that the murder conspirators had taken Baldwin's house keys from the shop
and used them to burglarize his residence of several guns, a plastic trash bag full of marijuana,
and a safe. So this guy had a giant bag of pot. Trash bag. I know, right. A trash bag of pot.
The marijuana and the guns were recovered on Friday in searches of Richards home and the boys
home. The safe still had a hard time with. Interesting. After being taken into custody,
Hoover talked. He told them all about what happened, that Mark Richards had planned the killing,
that they were he was hurting for money, the business. Sure. And if he didn't get money,
then he would have to fire him. Well, job security. I mean, right. Can't put a price tag on that.
No, you can't. I mean, the guy wanted. Can we give can we give young people a little bit of credit
for going the extra mile? Yeah, to keep a job. Yes. How about that? It's a scary job market.
If it's do or die out there. Thank you. So kill a guy, kill the guy. Duh. Baldwin also owed supposedly
owed Richard 3000. That's a little shaky part of the story. That's a shaky part of the story. Small
claims court is also a pain in the ass. Now, Hoover agreed to the murder when Richards promised him
$5,000 in a car. I give you five grand a car. In admitting that he was this offers what persuaded
him. Hoover revealed that his only regret was poor planning. That's nice. That's a good thing to say
to the cops. Looking back my one regret, I didn't get away with it. So they had a routine murder
of a couple of idiots. And they had all the evidence. Yeah, locked in check case. Yes.
Yes. And then they searched Richard's house. I got a good feeling about this. And they discovered
the secret organization called Penn Dragon. Okay. To be in the planning stages of an armed takeover
of Marin County. Penn Dragon. So wait, can I I mean, obviously this has to be like pentagram
and dragon. Nope. Totally different. Damn it. God, you think with your Welsh history, you would know
this. The detectives found some maps, aerial photographs of Marin, plans for a laser gun.
But wait, plans for plans for this is 1982. I bet there's four steps.
And two of them are acquiring and stealing a laser laser.
I don't think there's laser yet. Probably the height of like laser fantasy.
There's a lot of like, no, wasn't there a laser in one of the Superman movies? Oh,
yeah, there was. Yeah. So there's some sort of like lasers are big. That was what you saw. I mean,
I was not I was a three. But in that time period, when you see a laser, you'd be like, oh, boy,
somebody's going to get cut in half with light. You may have the county.
Instruction for the construction of machine guns. I love that. They're just instructions
laying around. Why I am when you can build. We got these papers that say how to do it. Now we
just need all the stuff to make it. Now we just need to get the brains. Jesus Christ. No books
containing reference to a new form of government. That's great. I assuming something to do with
lasers. Yes, of course, President laser beam. And they found a number of weapons. So, okay.
So these guys had weapons and had plans to build machine guns and laser guns.
Yeah, great. Okay. And they had overhead shots. So they've got all the big ones. Right.
Now, his lawyer, Richard's lawyer said that the he's like, there's no way that's real.
He's in his sci fi books. There's no way because if he is, I don't want to be part of this.
That's I love when lawyers, that's like their defense is like, I wouldn't represent a guilty
guy. Can I just say if the plan to take over Marin is real, I'd rather not do this. And I'm
doing it because this is fucking nuts. So he's innocent. And his wife said that he was doing
a fantasy novel entitled Imperial Marin that had already been published recently in Los Angeles.
And the staff of the local newspaper, the Marin independent journal,
verify that no such book existed. Oh, that's interesting. That was easy.
In a separate news item, the independent journal noted the unfortunate coincidence
that a San Francisco shirt magnet shirt manufacturer was named Penn Dragon
productions. And as a consequence has received numerous hostile telephone calls.
Since the story broke. Oh, my God.
Could you imagine working in that shirt? No, no, we're a different Penn Dragon.
Penn Dragon shirts. Hey, you motherfuckers, you murdered my uncle. No, no, no, we just do shirts.
You murder cuts want to take over the county? No, that's not us. We do like a Hendrick's
shirt. He's on a dragon. Why don't you take your laser beam gun and shove it up your ass,
Penn Dragon? Okay, large or extra large? Extra large. Will it shrink? Hey, wait a minute.
A little bit. Wait, I'll take it. Wait a minute.
That guy's so conflicted. He doesn't know what he wants.
The newspaper assured its readers that the shirt makers were not connected with the crime.
Okay. Well, last time from Page, Penn Dragon T shirts, not Penn Dragon, the takeover Marin guys.
Why couldn't he just? Yes, we are the Tommy Bahama organization. We're going to take over
the government. We are ready. Oh, fuck. In the weeks that followed a number of witnesses came
for with stories indicating the Penn Dragon group in fact existed. So Crossy Hoover told
investigators that one of the inducements to the murder was that Richard's promise to appoint him
Duke of Angels Island. So Angels Island is like, um, fuck, what's the island in New York where
all the immigrants came? Fuck and use Island. Yeah. Jesus Christ. How can we not remember that?
You should know. Stop it. I've got it right. Uh, Rutgers. Now, is it? That's a college. No,
Rutgers. Rikers. Was it something like this? Rutgers Island is a prison that's a boat. Yeah,
it's the boat prison. That's what you're talking about, right? So anyway, but that was like the
one and that's Angels Island was that in the San Francisco. And they obviously have a monarchy
on Angels Island. Very much so. Okay. The monarch is alive there. There's a king and a queen. Right.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So this is a thing that he could definitely take it over. Yeah. Oh, yeah.
You could just make they would they would have a system where a Duke could thrive. That's exactly
what I mean. Yes. Okay. Yes. Good. And I'm your new Duke. I am Crossy Hoover. 17 killed a guy.
Uh, Duke Crossy over. Do you have an appointment? The mother of Crossy informed the independent
journal that his son had left the group a month before because Mark Richards was quote unquote
getting really weird. I won't hear of that. Not my mark. Another person close to Richards
told the newspaper that Mark was fascinated with medieval history and talked about taking over
all of California. A dream that did not prevent his friend from describing him as enthusiastic
and not at all sinister. Oh, well, that's good. His heart's in the right place for the takeover.
That's good. As long as it's a good hearted coup. I don't understand that how crazy people find other
crazy people to just talk to. You know, it is. It's almost like sometimes like, you know, you'll
see like two crazy homeless people together, and they'll both be talking and they're not really
listening. Yeah. But there's something about the bond of just being near someone also. There's
energy. Yeah, there's something there. Yeah. Oh my God, you also believe in aliens?
Hey, yeah. Yeah, it's like, I believe the aliens are homosexuals. Like, well, I believe they're here
to give us all cancer, but that's pretty close. And I haven't gotten near that with anyone. So if
you want to come down the block and shut a trash with me, that sounds like a plan.
Okay. In a pen and journal also, we'll call it the journal, the journal also learned of
Richards plans in 1977 to lease the San Francisco Theological Seminary building
for use as a school to study the future. Okay, so this building is a building in
You know this building. I know this building very well. It's a building in San Ensamo,
and it looks like a castle. Much like something a Duke would go into.
It no, it's okay. Oh, shit. It looks like a castle. Yeah. So it's a seminary that like,
you that looks like it's straight out of Europe, right? Yes, that looks like Hogwarts.
So I mean, look, he's onto something. So I mean, I'm liking what I'm hearing.
Tell me more about this laser gun.
This is where it's great. According to the proposed catalog, the school called Future Castle.
This guy, this guy needed, he needs a marketing person to get involved. He stole a company's
name for his organization, Future. We'll study the future in it. It would be an innovative
academic community dedicated to the origins of the new Renaissance. So that sounds like at Future
Castle, they're going to be studying history. Yeah, of the future. Well, it sounds normal.
Well, the ambitious project was, which was to provide a faculty, including actor, William Shatner.
Oh, no. And writer, producer George Lucas. Oh, no. So this guy's just a crazy sci-fi nerd.
Maybe. The plan came to nothing when the seminary canceled the lease for nonpayment of rent.
Which means he went to the seminary and told them his plans. And they said yes. And everything
was good to go until the check did not clear. Well, they were waiting for a red flag.
Can you blame them? They waited for one red flag and it finally popped up. He didn't pay.
Who in the fuck was, I want to talk to the guy at the seminary. It was like, this all sounds pretty
good, bud. Yeah. I'm pretty excited. I'm going to have Nick Nolte come down. He's going to teach a
class. Well, this sounds very good and normal. Have you heard of Harrison Ford? Yeah, we're big
Harrison Ford fifth. Well, that's funny. He's going to be teaching whipping up in Future Castle,
in the crazy wing. Okay, we're just going to need a check. Oh my God. That's going to be an issue.
And then the guy had to go to his boss and went, I don't know what happened, man. This was a great
idea, but the check didn't clear. Oh man, this guy seems so reliable. In a court affidavit,
other teenage employees of Richards, Neil disclosed that Hoover was not the only person
Richards had solicited to murder Baldwin. Oh, that's good. Neil stated that in late May,
Richards had offered him a dune buggy as a reward for killing the car dealer.
So, oh, I'm just so sick of this guy, Baldwin. It's just, whoa. Well, what are you?
It's just where someone could take care of him, you know? What do you mean? What do you mean,
take care of him? You know, like, take care of him. Whoever would do it, there'd be a nice dune buggy
in a phone. Did you say dune buggy? The purple one over there? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Runs like a dream,
too. I'll tell you, the only thing that stands between someone in that purple dream machine
is just killing Baldwin. What about buying it? No, come on. Come on. Don't be, you sound crazy.
Murder Baldwin. Sounds crazy. Buy it. I'm gonna think about it. Think about it. I'm gonna think
about it. Buy it. It's, you know, another man. I have bamboo, jeez. Screens. Another man told the
journal that he had attended a Pendragon conclave some months ago, but found it, quote unquote,
too far-fetched. What about it was far-fetched? I was, can I ask you a question here, Mark?
Um, the laser? Yes. Uh, how is that a thing? Well, we'll get it.
Okay. Where you going? Hey, there's also probably some guy who showed up to the conclave
there thinking it was a shirts thing. He's probably like two hours into it, like,
what are they gonna start talking about t-shirts? Wait, are we not still screening here?
Is this where the silk screening happens? I have a question about shirts.
Rock Pendragon. Get out of here. They're down on 4th street. No wonder William Shatner's so late.
He had been invited, this guy had been invited to the four hour meeting. It's a, it was a four hour
meeting about taking over the run by a friend who had been paid 500 by Richards to recruit
Pen-Dragon members. So he is paying people 500 bucks, but then, but then he just owed everybody
money. He didn't just know he's paying, right? Yeah. At the weekly meetings, leader Mark Richards
told them, told them about his plans, weekly four hour meeting. The uprising would begin
when the country's economy collapsed. Okay, stage one, something that's totally out of
our control. Okay. We wait for rock bottom. When will that be? Don't know. Don't know.
10, 100 years don't know. Gonna happen. Gonna happen. Gonna happen. People are gonna look for a leader
with a laser. Who's best friends with George Lucas and William Shatner? We're gonna get George
Lucas up here to talk to him about a laser. Hey, George, you know in the movie. Untie me. George.
Untie me. George, you know in the movie, the things that you shoot. The lasers untie me. Yeah,
can we get a laser? Digital, you moron. Okay. A top mountain, Temple Pies. Now,
Temple Pies is the biggest mountain in, in that area. Okay. You see it from San Francisco. It's
huge. The Sequoia Wooded Peak, they dominated the Bay Area. A laser gun would be aimed towards
San Francisco across the Golden Gate Bridge. Okay. I'll let you know when something sounds
weird. I'm gonna put up top there and I'm gonna say, freeze, motherfuckers. Yeah. You like that bridge, huh?
This laser doesn't. The rebels were to seal off all roads leading in and out of Marin County.
Sure. Okay. Marin County is largely surrounded by water, except the top part, which is just a
giant piece of land that there's a lot of roads. So they got their work cut out for them. It's gonna
be a, they need a lot of teenagers. But they're all getting $500 day rates and have lasers. Bingo.
So we're good. Establish a fortified headquarters in the, in the San Francisco Theological Seminary
in San Osama. Both the Golden Gate Bridge to the south and the Richmond-San Erefeld Bridge that
connected Marin County with Contra Costa County would have to be destroyed. Obviously, it's in
the way. Yeah. Well, people, you don't want people coming in. No, you're gonna hold this shit. Yes.
Prisoners would be released from San Quentin Prison. Smart. Because they didn't want to have to
deal with feeding them. Yeah. And what better way to start a kingdom than by releasing all the gang
labors. Yes. That's how you get to the top. Yeah. And the murders. That's how you make sure you hold
on to your power. Right. You release the, the people that'll take it. When Marin was isolated
from the rest of California, isolated is, yeah, stretch. Sure. It would be transformed into a
kingdom on the model of Camelot. Oh, good. Easy. Ironically, this is exactly how Camelot started.
Camelot started with a laser, too. A man in a dream.
Just a guy blows up a couple of bridges, the laser. We like the new King Arthur. Meet the new
King. He's ruined everything and released the prisoners. All hail him. The leader was to serve
as benevolent pen dragon. Ah, good. Of imperial Marin with his teenage followers who would be
elevated to knighthood. Good. So if you're a teenager and you want to be, I got nothing going
on. I mean, I can't, I was going to go to college, but you know, she happened and I just didn't like
to be a knight in a kingdom much like Camelot. Yeah. Yeah. Sick. Okay. Come here. I would like
to do that. Sick. You're a knight. Once we blow up the Golden Gate Bridge with a laser.
Okay. So get some of your friends. Okay. Get them over here. They'll all be knights, too. We're
all knights. We will be once we melt the Golden Gate Bridge with a laser beam. Do we have to get
GEDs? Cause a lot of my boys. No, you're getting $500 a day, too. Did I mention that? A day? A day.
Yeah. So, you know what? I'm going to be, I'm going to get my boys. Get your boys. Yeah. Get back
here. You seem smart. I know what I'm doing. I'll tell you one thing. I know what I'm doing.
Did you see that safe? Yeah. I punched it in. Do it that. Pen Dragon or Pen Threg. Oh, lovely
pronunciation. Meaning in Welsh Head Dragon or Chief Dragon. I'm sorry. I didn't know this.
Chief Dragon. Chief Dragon. It's the name of several traditional kings of the Britons,
including King Arthur. Now King Arthur is not real. Right. He's a legendary British leader
of the fifth and sixth centuries. But aside from that. Aside from that, it's a great plan. Yes.
It all matches up nicely. Although some people, there are some people who do think he is real
and they think that they have some documentation or evidence that he is. So he's kind of more like
Jesus. Some people think the earth is 6000 years old. So. Okay. Fair point.
Some of the would-be knights had their doubts about the plan. Well, not a night of mine.
You're vanquished from the castle. Hey, I have some questions about the plan. It seems kind of
I have some questions for you off of this head. What? No. Okay. You're not a knight. Okay. I don't
have questions, man. Can I be a knight again? Yes. We need numbers. We're really low on
recruitment. We got four. Yeah. You're huge to the plan. They pointed very diplomatically
that the laser gun to be placed on Mount Tam had not yet been invented. Okay. So am I crazy to
think that's an issue? It seems like that might fuck with this a little. I don't know why. You
know, it just has to. Well, it just seems like the thing that solidifies the plan is the threat
of the laser. So you're just saying time. You're just saying we have to wait. Maybe forever. Yeah.
Yeah. You know what? I just saw a movie called Star Wars. So you want to tell me there's not
lasers. Okay. That's great. Good luck. Why don't you guys, since you're teenagers and you're knights,
sit down and shut the fuck up because the pen dragon's talking. Listen to the king of pen dragon.
It's not a king of pen dragon. Shit. The pen dragons means the fucking king. Sorry, your majesty.
I just. Don't make me. Don't make me whip out the Welsh. The Welsh what? The way Welsh says the way
they say it. Okay. Your majesty. Your majesty. I wonder if they had to call him your majesty.
No doubt they had to do something stupid. He was probably getting blown by all of them,
if I'll be honest. I gotta hope so. Okay. The leader conceded that the laser had not been invented.
Okay. Quite a concession. But financing had been obtained for other weapons. Oh.
Including machine guns and missiles. Okay. Sure. So. Doesn't really have the cache that say a laser.
And stockpiling of the weapons was happening on Mount Tam and in Fresno. Good. All right.
Right. The big ones. Conveniently. Sure. We're doing it on the place. We're going to
shoot everything and then oddly we're doing all the other stuff three and a half hours away.
So. Like a 200 hour drive. We're gonna need that dune buggy back. The dune buggy.
The royal dune buggy. When members of the pen dragon group went beyond expressing reservations
and decided to leave the ranks. Whoa. Mark Richards threatened that disclosure of his plot
would mean death. For him. Not for anyone else. Okay. Now don't tell anyone about my crazy plan
nights. Wow. The king's really pathetic. Now hold on a minute nights. You tell anyone I'll kill you.
King says X-Nay. Please. Please. In August 1982 a preliminary hearing of the charges against Mark
Richards was held in the Marin Municipal Court. The star witness was Andrew. Oh good. Right.
Who had been bad for Mark. Who had been giving immunity from prosecution
in return for his testimony. Oh boy. That's a jury you want to be on. Yeah. Again. I'd be on that
jury. Oh and a fucking heartbeat. I'd love it. Members of the jury pool. If any of you have
any past history with lasers or pen dragons or any sort of kingdoms. Love Star Wars. Love Star Wars.
Love Star Trek. I've ever considered taking over a county. You may be excused. No hands.
No hands are going up. No pen dragons. No pen dragons. Not the shirt company. None of your Welsh.
All right. Okay. I think we got our jurors. No not the shirt company. You can stay. You're fine.
You're fine sir. It's just shirts where you guys make. By the way I like the Hendricks one on the
dragon. Thanks. We're out of business. Fucking asshole. So Andrew confirmed that Baldwin had
been murdered so the killers could rob his house and sell his cars and the crime had been planned
months in advance which is my favorite part of the whole story is that they planned for months
and the plan was when I scratch my head. Beat the fuck out of him with a bat and then stab him
with a screwdriver and a knife. All right. Now we wait two months after the brilliant murder.
They put the freshly purchased boat in the water in the Loch Lomond Marina in San Rafael
and went back to the shop but they were confronted by a security guard when they put the boat in
because they didn't they didn't have they had no rights to use the Loch Lomond. They were just
putting a boat in the water right in the middle of the night and a security guy went everyone.
Wait. What are you guys doing? This is like the murder hour. What are you guys up to?
Doing some night fishing. Where are the poles?
We're just hands. You're not fishing with your hands? Yeah, we made a bet.
All right. You can't put your boat here. Can I show you some? That's the nope. Can I show you
this? Wait. What? I'm a bandra. I love those shirts. Yep. I love those shirts. All right. So
we're gonna go. All right. Good luck catching fish with your hands at night. Then they after
they put the boat in the water I love that they went I love that they didn't take the body that
they that they that they first went and got the boat. When you could just take the boat to the
place where the body is put the boat in the body put the body in the boat. Yeah. Then take the boat
to the water. Yeah. But they took the they went and got the boat put it in the water then went back
to get the body and like carried it on their shoulders to the boat like it's just like they
should just walk around and catch us. That's why you always need six months to plan. You really
see the nascent of two months here. So so they got the body from the from the shop. Sure. And then
they brought it back to the body shop. Yeah. Thank you. Well done. They were questioned again by
the security guard. I mean this is who now saw them with a body wrapped in a tarp. You guys caught
a big fish with your hands. What is that. Oh it's bait. Oh wow. You guys must be catching
sturgeons. Yeah. No we got we caught a we caught a shark and we're going to try to use it to catch
other fish. It's great. I love sharks. OK. I wish I'd look at it closer but I won't see you but
I will see you. Bye. So they were forced to the boat stalled several times. Oh good news. They were
forced to drop the body much closer land than they had planned. Well you know that's an audible
everybody's always comfortable. It's weird when you buy a boat at the last minute to dump a body
with it. It doesn't work. And then to just be like you know what let's just dump it near shore.
You know what what could go wrong. Whatever. I'm tired. You're tired. What could go wrong.
Let's just go to bed. Throw a motor on it. OK. The carton of weights intended to sink the corpse
to the bottom of the bay. We're buoyant. Broke the rope binding it to the body.
That must have been such a great moment to watch. Oh as they as they take the body out
with all the weights on it and throw it overboard and the rope just snaps. Fuck.
Fuck. No it's floating. It's floating. Go get the weights. We don't need the weights. You know what
we have in this boat. A motor. A motor. Oh yeah. So they tied the motor to the body.
Oh. Which I assume didn't float. No. Then they just left. Yeah. Fuck it. You know what.
Kudos on a job. Well done. The kingdom is nigh. Good work night.
Right. Ask in court whether he had ever considered going to the police prior to the murder. Andrew
said we weren't going to turn market just because he was talking about killing people. Yeah. I mean
look he's a king. Yeah. They say a lot of stuff before the trial. Richards was released on a 250
thousand dollar bail. How the fuck did he do that. It's he's the craziest human that has ever
walked into a courtroom and the judge is like you're good quarter of a million.
Hey hold on. Stay away from kingdoms. No lasers while you're on the outside your majesty.
Okay. On January 11th the defense filed a motion seeking to prohibit use of any evidence relating
to the pen dragon conspiracy. Well I'll tell you what that's a defense nightmare because that's kind
of a big part of this. The defense is like you can't talk about our kingdom and all the kingdom
stuff we're doing. What I mean you can't talk about the murder. Can you imagine trying like being like
yeah and so we don't want to talk about the marriage for the safety of the wife and then
pen dragon and then we're good. Those are the two big ones. Those are two hot buttons. I have to try.
Don't you talk about his wife. I have to try to defend you. Oh yeah. So I have to be able to talk
about the conspiracy. No. Nope. I can't know about the lasers. Okay. Okay. That's cool.
Can we take a recess. Dennis Reardon voice concern that a jury. Dennis Reardon voice. He's the
Dennis Reardon. He's the attorney. Defensive attorney. Dennis Reardon. He voiced concern
that a jury of Mern residents would be prejudiced by the introduction of documents that claim to
reflect a plot for an armed takeover their county. You know. They'd probably take it a little personally.
Fair. For us to take that a little personally. It's going to be hard for him to get a fair trial
in the town he was talking about ruining. But the deputy secretary got it in. I did. Yeah.
He'd like the jury. The judge is like. Yeah. I think that'd be fun. It seems like most of it.
As the judge I'm going to rule. I think this will be fun. Yeah. So we're going to do that.
And this is a quote from the district attorney Berber Bean. Jesus. Whoa. Yep.
Berber Bean. He wanted to use the Penn Dragon plot because it was one of the reasons behind
the murder and because he was manipulating two teenagers who were quote not mental giants.
He said. He's very sweet. He's fucking idiots. These non mental giants.
So a week later the judge ruled that Penn Dragon could be used in the sounds like a pretty good
judge. Yes. Except for the bail. Let's do the kingdom thing. In the opening statement
they said that Richards did it and he formed the Penn Dragon group. A college student
who had been working for Richards contract. A night. A night. Thank you. Fair.
Testified to his surprise following the days of the murder of Richards
that a boat had been purchased new video equipment and jewelry for his wife.
So he's literally the worst criminal of all time. I mean.
These signs of wealth struck the witness as odd since his paychecks were bouncing.
Huh. So how does a guy with no fucking money get a boat and all the jewelry.
So it happened. Andrew said that Richards was the first guy who suggested killing Richards
that that Richard's first guy. He's a killing ball. He was a guy like let's kill this guy.
Yeah. Let's kill him. And he said you know why we should kill him. Two reasons.
He's a Nazi and he's a faggot. Hey those are the big two.
Wow. Yes my king. So there's two reasons. There's two. I'm going to lay out two really gooders.
And he's and he also said if we do the murder then we can use the money to buy guns for Penn Dragon.
But first and foremost he's a gay Nazi. And Andrew was like I don't know. But then he was
like I also want the money. So he agreed. By the way the guard also testified.
They got a big fish. And this is so great. He was first of all he was disappointed that he had
not looked more closely. We all are at the men with the giant tarp on their shoulders. Yeah.
And the guard also testified that he had read part of Richard's science fiction manuscript
entitled Penn Dragon and that it involved the separation of men from the rest of the country.
So somehow this had leaked out everywhere and people were reading it. Jesus.
Meanwhile during the trial it was reported by a woman who was dating Mark Richard. So he's out on
bail. Right. And he's dating. Yeah. Well he's. Yeah. He's a bachelor. He's a swinging bachelor. He's a king.
He's a king. She reported that he was carrying a gun. Sure. So then they brought her in to testify
to revoke his bail. And she said Richard has identified himself as Francis Regal crazy.
Oh my God. He called himself Regal crazy. I'm going to need it one more time.
He called himself Francis Regal crazy.
And he had his own Disney cartoon. Franklin razzle crazy. Francis. Francis razzle crazy.
A South American consular official. Oh no. It's not just a name. It's like he's got on a fake
mustache. You just see him in a fake mustache and like a dictator's outfit. Yeah. I'm Francis.
What's your name. Me. Yeah. Why I'm Francis. Regal crazy.
Why. It sounds like he's Val Kilmer in The Saint.
And when he met people he introduced his date as an aunt. And this is my girlfriend aunt.
Apparently fearing that she might recognize him from newspaper photographs he had told her
that a cousin named Mark Richards was in trouble with the law. Oh my God. Oh that's just my cousin.
Yeah. He's gone through a really tough time. It's the worst criminal ever. No.
Fred. Things are good for Francis. If you see a guy in the paper that looks like me that's not
South African. That's my cousin. That's my crazy identical cousin. So he don't. Yeah. Don't worry
about that. We got to go. This is going to be long. Yeah. Long thing. Don't worry. I got a good
feeling about us. I might go away for 15 or something. But just to visit my crazy cousin
who's probably in jail. When she asked him why he kept a gun in his car the diplomat told her
that he needed it for political reasons. Yep. So now this is political. Now this was brought up in
court. Why is it admissible. In the hearing to revoke his bail.
He said Mark Richards said everything the woman has said was true. Okay. But he had not known
that the glove was in the compartment the glove compartment the gun was in the glove compartment
of the car because he had bought the borrowed the car from his father. Okay. So he didn't know it
was there. It was his dad's car. And then when the prosecuting attorney said well then why was
the gun there for political reasons. He said I see this trials political. So that's why I have the
gun. So first of all someone should hold on to their bail. So first of all it's not my gun. I
didn't know it was there. Secondly I have it because of this trial. Okay. Those are very now you
think about that mother. I mean I consider everything political. This trial is political.
The judge did not revoke his bail. That's my favorite thing of all time.
Why the judge just like well that's not enough to revoke a guy. Well you heard him.
It's his dad's. First of all we're talking about his cousin. First of all this isn't even the right
man. We've got the imposter. This man is basically Francis Muggle crazy.
Look is a judge until I see ID saying he's not Muggle crazy.
This is all for nothing. Here's an ID that says that. Bail granted. The trial resumed
with evidence regarding the Penn Dragon group. Uh huh. Mark Fuller a farm employee of Richard
stated that Willie Robles another fellow employee had approached him about joining Penn Dragon.
There's not a normal name in this story. No. No. And that Richards had later warned him that he
would be eliminated if he said anything to outsiders about the group. Robles testified
that Richards paid him to recruit members. So could you imagine you're like hanging out at the
store and a guy comes up and goes hey man how old are you? 17. You want to uh you want to take over
this fucking county? What's that? Do you want to take over this fucking county? Sure I mean.
You want to be a knight? Of course I want to be a knight. Yeah but this is 20th century.
Let's get the fuck out of here. Okay. Get in my pino. It's across the street. Wait a minute.
What the hell's going on? I'm gonna take you to a meeting. Are you a duke? We're gonna take this.
Yeah. God the license plate says Duke. Duke. What's my pino license plate say? There you go.
It says Duke so. Yeah. Hello. Duke. It says Duke number one. Duke Willie Robles. That's right.
Think about that shit. All right. Your tags are expired. Move along. A friend of the defendant
told the jury that Richards had taken him to the top of Mount Telopias to show him the promised
land of the new Marin and to demonstrate his plan for the insurrection. Richards had said that
quote we could blow up the Golden Gate Bridge down there and we could blow up the Richmond
San Rafael Bridge and destroy the Richmond oil refineries and if we went farther north and blew
up the bridge to Petaluma Marin would be isolated and his friend was like sounds cool bro. It sounds
easy. The defense final argument included the Pendragon. Mark's role model was King Arthur.
Pendragon was the dream of a young man who wanted to be King Arthur. Is that evidence of a crime?
Yeah. Well he has a creative imagination. These kids are playing a game of Knights in the Round
Table and either misunderstood it or want to be a game of cops and robbers. I don't think so
in 17 but okay. Yeah. I mean they're 17. Yeah. They're not like really. Santa's fake.
Four days they convicted him of first degree murder. He was sentenced to life in prison
without possibility of parole. Good. Good. Now Hoover is the other guy. Yeah. They argue that he
should be tried as a juvenile and they brought in a child psychiatrist who said he had a borderline
personality disorder and that there was a good chance that he wouldn't kill again and the judge
was like well that's a good chance is not a great thing to say. Yeah. You know what? He's probably
not going to kill again. Big on the probability. Yeah. Are you with me? So she wanted him combined
to a mental institution and then they argued that he knew what the fuck he was doing and that
he is mentally disturbed but go to jail. Yeah. He should go to jail. They found him guilty after
days deliberations. Okay. And he was convicted I think it was 25 years. All right. And then so that
was in 1982. So he's out. This is the saddest part of the story. Oh no. The prosecution introduced
comments that Hoover made to a clinical psychologist in September of 1982 regarding a state of mind
before the killing. This is so horrible. Oh no. It was like Richards was coaching me. He would listen
to what I said and push me on. When I said I was with Baldwin he kept thinking this is the guy
standing between me and the money. It made me excited. I thought about guns I could buy and
all the other stuff. I knew it was wrong but I didn't give a damn. Did you ever think of getting
5000? Did you ever think of wanting to be with your mother? My mother could move back to Marin
County. I could have my own room so I wouldn't have to look at her all the time but oh man
I just think about how happy I'd be how much love I would get and how many things I'd have.
Okay. That's so bad. Yeah. So he's just a dumb. This heart's in the right place. Oh my gosh. It is.
Like he's. Oh gosh. He's the saddest night in all of the Pendragon. Well then I can have my mom live.
Oh no. Oh I don't see. You sweetheart. I just wanted to take it over the county so I could move
back in with my mommy. You're guilty of being adorable. I know that much.
Hey cutie. Oh I can't stay mad at you.
No. Put the teddy bear down. Put the bear down. Come here you. You get a hug. Hugs not drugs.
So Camelot lost its king at its night. They both went to jail. He came to Pearl in 2009
after the 25 years. Yeah. They said no and he can't seek Pearl again for 15 years. Jesus.
He is in the state prison at Vacaville. What is Vacaville? That's where Hoover is.
Ah. Now I'm going to give you the address of what Mark Richards. Okay. 2100 Peabody Road,
Vacaville, California. Prison number C95830. They're in the same fucking prison. Oh no.
They're in the same prison. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. This could be Penitentiary Dragon.
So I look up. Oh no. What has happened to these guys? Where are they now?
Now. And I find an interview with Mark Richards. Oh boy. Who is now married. Oh no. Who married
a woman named Joanne. Who used to be a journalist and went to interview him and fell in love with him
as journalists do and fell in love with him because of his brain. And now they're married.
That's just, imagine your daughter giving you that news. And now it's going to come back around
to last week's episode. Oh no. Joanne and Mark Richards of the Earth Defense Headquarters. Whoa.
They're all about aliens now. No. They're all about aliens.
Present a story that reaches back generations. Mark Richards is serving a life sentence for murder
that became known as the Pen Dragon plot where the government put him in prison
to keep him from what he because of all the knowledge he has. Oh yeah. Yep. Years after
the crime he came to public attention and claims to have been a space command pilot who led an
attack against aliens to reclaim a secret base at Dulce, New Mexico. You remember that battle,
the battle of Dulce? Yeah, I think it was page six news, but I remember it. Yeah. He cited a
remarkable family history that includes numerous covert activities affecting global interests
and top level alien contact. I mean, fuck me. I mean, seriously. The fact that a guy who is
clearly psychotic, he's psychotic. Yeah. But he can just get all these kids involved in this thing
and murder a guy. It's fucking nuts. Yeah. Bush was president two times. It is shocking.
It's always shocking. It's always shocking when there is the somebody has the power of persuasion
to even just convince the 19 people that they're fucking some that they're Jesus Christ or whatever
it is, or that they're going to go kill themselves in the desert and they'll end up on a spaceship.
Yeah. It's just, I mean, this guy was clearly like he was so stupid that he couldn't be a cult
leader. Yeah. He so wanted to be a cult leader. Yeah. He was almost like he's a tragic cult leader
here. Yeah. I mean, you hear about the successful ones. Yeah. You hear about the Mansons and the
guy in the Waco. Well, that's really what this is, right? This is like they and not that this plot
would have ever come to fruition, but they thwarted a plot to do some crazy shit. Yeah.
Because the guy is just fucking retarded. This could have easily been a thing where a
bunch of people died. This could have been a thing where we were like, wow, the Golden Gate
bridge had an explosion. Yeah. Totally. If not from a laser, if this guy wasn't a total moron,
but instead because he was psychotic enough. Instead, he came up with part of the plan,
which was when he scratch, when I scratch my head, you beat him with the back.
And he just, he just kept getting recruiting teenagers who would be like,
you know, and I'm going to go to the Amway meeting across the street. God damn it,
these teenagers. I will kill you. It's just somebody should have told me teenagers were kind
of flaky. Why am I obsessed with the teens? It's going to be so hard to be a king.
When I was a star in my hometown. Listen, I think it's great and it explains a lot.
How about me? Yeah, you turned out pretty good. Pretty good. Pretty good. For that county. Yeah.
For that county.
Over and out.
Okay. Here we go. Hi there, dollop people. This is Gareth, not Gary. Gareth, enough already.
I've got some stand-up dates I wanted to keep you updated on. Join me on the road. We're having
a lot of laughs. March 13th, I will be at Summit City Comedy in Fort Wayne, Indiana. Tuesday,
March 14th, I'll be at Helium Comedy Club in Indianapolis. March 15th, Wednesday, I'll be at
the Louisville Comedy Club in Louisville, Kentucky. March 16th, I'll be at the Columbus
Funny Bone in Columbus, Ohio. Dayton, Ohio, March 17th, Friday at the Funny Bone. March 18th,
I'll be at the Funny Bone in Perrysburg, Ohio and that's two shows that night. March 19th,
I will be at Hilarities and it'll be Hilarious in Cleveland, Ohio. March 21st, I'll be in Lexington,
Kentucky. I'm drunk at Comedy Off Broadway. March 22nd, I will be in St. Louis at the
Galleria. March 23rd, I will be at the Comedy Club of Kansas City and Friday, March 24th,
I'll be in Des Moines, Iowa. Same with March 25th, Saturday, Des Moines, Iowa and then March 26th,
I'll be at the Funny Bone in Omaha, Nebraska. Also, April 12th, the Tacoma Comedy Club,
I told you I was drunk and then April 13th, I will be in Spokane and then April 14th and April
15th, I will be in Bozeman, Montana at Last Best Comedy. You can go to garethrenalds.com
for all that ticket information, so come join me on the road. garethrenalds.com. We're having laughs.
I'm drunk.