The Doug Stanhope Podcast - Bonus Episode - #508: "Test Us For Asbestos"
Episode Date: December 1, 2022Lots of phone calls but not a lot getting done. Doug fills us in. Recorded Nov 30th, 2022 at the QuietHouse in Bisbee, AZ with Doug Stanhope (@dougstanhope), Bingo (@bingobingaman), Raider, Tracey (@e...gglester), and Ggreg Chaille (@gregchaille). Produced and Edited by Chaille. Still time to grab tickets at The Plaza for New Year's Eve with Doug Stanhope - https://www.plazahotelcasino.com/entertainment/doug-stanhope/ . Football Sunday in the sports book is a bonus this time around. See you in Vegas. We have no idea what the future holds so get on the Mailing List at https://www.dougstanhope.com/. When we know, we'll let you know. LINKS - Visit the Stanhope Store - http://www.dougstanhope.com/store/ Closing song, “The Stanhope Rag”, written and performed by Scotty Conant for Doug Stanhope and used with permission – Available on Soundcloud - https://soundcloud.com/scottyconant Photo Credit - ChailleSupport the show: http://www.Patreon.com/stanhopepodcast
Transcript
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you're listening to the doug stanhope podcast
i am not silencing my phone because i i'm i can almost guarantee someone uh from the insurance
the temporary housing the, the renovation people.
Someone's going to call during this fucking podcast.
I had such just a wealth of violent anger coming into this podcast.
And then I finally got the fucking call that cleared it all up.
Like right before you got here.
You and your goddamn World Cup.
It's so goddamn important to you,
which I've been waking up
at three in the morning
to watch.
I know.
You wake me up.
It's weird because I don't have,
you don't develop a sleep schedule.
I don't, not that in the World Cup.
Watching it with you guys,
with the Chalys,
bingos here,
the Chalys are here.
And we watched the USAalys. Bingo's here, the Chalys are here. And we watched USA against
England.
Wait, no, that was the boring one.
What was USA against?
They had to win yesterday in the hotel.
Oh, sorry.
Yesterday was Iran. Iran, yeah.
I went all the way back. It was a huge one.
And watching it with you guys going
fucking out of your minds was great.
If you weren't into football, you still go
to Super Bowl parties because
everyone's into it and you're into it.
Even football, which I like football,
but without football parties,
without football Sunday, without five
screens of fucking five different
games and all your pals around and making dinner to sit and watch a game alone.
It's boring as fuck.
So that was a great game yesterday.
That was a fun game.
Yeah, that was that was it was maybe feel like what other countries feel
when they're watching their team almost beat the US.
That's how I felt like to come on, we can't lose to Iran.
Kind of thing.
I'm going, are you getting a little too racist?
Yeah, not racist.
Just like too caught up in it.
But it's like it is.
Well, three of us have been alive long enough to have been around for the Iran hostage crisis in 1980.
What are you talking about guys?
You were four.
And if it happened yesterday,
you wouldn't fucking know it.
So,
and we had just watched that documentary about the,
the embassy hostages as a four parter.
So yeah,
that's what it was about.
So yeah,
Iran was the most hated thing in the world.
Ayatollah ass-hole-a played on the radio and bleeped.
Wasn't there a station that played it like 24 hours?
Maybe.
Yeah, there was all that kind of shit going on.
Yeah.
God, nationalism used to be so much fun when you were a kid
and couldn't see through it.
I mean, it's fun now because this is a world stage where the Super Bowl isn't the world champions of anything.
The world we let in.
Yeah, the world with exclusive access to a first world country.
So, yeah, it's exciting.
I thought. I know.
One of the announcers says it's called football in some parts of the world.
No, every other part of the world calls it football.
We're the only ones that don't.
I don't know.
Australian rules football.
Maybe that's still football.
But it was funny today because the comment the commentators were i mean alexi one of
the uh was he a keeper on the u.s team i didn't think he was a keeper i think he was a striker
well anyway he was all fired up today about how like america is embracing. And it's like, boy,
you've been waiting for this day since you've started when you had to explain to your dad what a soccer ball was right now.
It's like everyone.
Cause he said,
I called you a fruit.
Yeah,
totally.
That's not football.
Then he beat him with a football.
The,
but he's like his kids.
He said some story and might not be true,
but,
but his kids were at school and they had a break from studies
so they could watch the U.S. team and Iran, which I thought was great.
He was really fired up.
I don't know if you were there, but he went on some tirade
where you could tell he's looking down to read it off his paper.
Oh, yeah.
It was like a huge rant, and he's just getting red-faced.
And you could see, what's the other player that's the announcer on that panel?
The guy that sits right next to him.
The bug-eyed, kind of half-black, bug-eyed guy.
Yeah, I don't know his name.
He was just, you could, he's just looking at the other people and trying to.
Let him go.
Yeah, trying to swallow a sneer.
Like, oh my God, go on.
But he's, yeah, he is he gets very uh passionate about it and today it was different
because instead of like lambasting like uh the american team or something he was really just like
so stoked that soccer has finally or football has finally like we can call it yeah we can go well
let's just do what the rest of the world does, right? No, no, because then we sound like posers.
Oh, all right.
Unless you want to call it football.
And pretend you're a Mexican, which, sorry, Mexico.
I was really rooting for you today.
Wait, they fucking, there was two nothing.
They won the game, but they didn't go forward.
They couldn't go forward.
I know, because Saudi Arabia scored one goal in the last two minutes.
In extra time, in overage, they scored, and that was it. I mean, it was scored one goal in the last two minutes. Extra time in overage.
They scored.
And I mean, it was a fucked.
Well, that's because I missed that because I was on the fucking phone with state fucking farm again.
Since I woke up this morning.
Sorry, we fucking delved into a little bit of football, but I was watching that.
And then there were two goals after there was two nothing that were called offside.
watching that and then there were two goals it was after there was two nothing that were called offside and uh then i was fucking talking to i had to break out my other phone because i'm on hold
with state farm this is how fucked up it is i've talked to at least probably 11 different people
about different things since this shit got started. It was nine days.
Today has been nine days since the fire without,
like no one could get a hold.
And I still have never talked to this guy.
I tweeted and Instagrammed and fucking TikTok'd or whatever.
Fucking Hannigan put it on everything.
I finally made a video because this guy won't return my calls.
And he's the guy that has to approve everything from the temporary housing to the renovations to the and we had a guy come out
and he's like yeah we need to get in there as soon as possible get the moisture out of there
so fucking whatever dry rot or black mold or fucking the bubonic plague whatever's gonna set
in well he's like we're just waiting for approval i go from who the city he goes no your claims rep
he won't get back to us and then the temporary housing she's like i can't i can't get them on
the phone i don't know what to do maybe you just you know get your own fucking temporary housing
and this is not what we see on the commercials yeah with the blankets and scrubbing baby ducks
and all this fucking shit.
Well, I really fucking Jake from State Farm,
while I was paying attention to those commercials on Sunday for the first time,
all he does is tell you what fucking great rates they have.
He doesn't say they're going to do anything.
You're going to get anything for it.
You fucks.
And what is interesting is the claims adjuster adjuster was johnny on the spot with
the first phone call and then that that was it because that's how we got his name when he left
a message wait not caleb casanova no he had the only time i've left him messages but he called
us once so we know i called him once we've talked to him there's something i know he's alive yes
yes i called him once uh as as i had been swapping phone calls with the temporary housing lady
too many times so when i got him on the phone initially i said is this caleb casanova and he
went yeah and i go ah shit then she called on the other line i, I'll call you right back because I finally get the housing lady.
Oh, you didn't just put the two phones together?
Well, today I realized I figured out how to merge a call.
Oh, yeah.
But it didn't really work out because I was on hold, which is very weird.
Remember when Bingo was telling you the other day how I know the Delta hold music?
Yeah.
Like to the note?
Oh.
Yeah.
I'm right. Yeah. But. Today I called State Farm. Same fucking hold music like to the note. I'm right.
Today I called State Farm. Same
fucking hold music.
He wakes me up and starts
ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding-a-ding
and I'm like, fuck, you're talking
to Delta. No, State Farm.
We gotta get that gig, hold music.
He knows it by heart.
He's a musician. He needs to
join Shelly Ukulele.
So this Caleb Casanova, so that was the initial, the first day after.
Yeah.
I get done with the temporary housing lady and call him right back,
goes to voicemail.
Sorry, I cut you off, but he's playing phone tag.
And then I call it again, but I was playing phone tag. And then I called again. Nothing.
Never again.
Then the guy came out to look at the house to do the inspection.
The damaged.
Yeah, the damaged guy, Isaiah.
He's cool as shit.
He's very good.
And he's like, I can't get through to them.
Then Christina from the temporary housing, I can't get through to him.
So my own agent here
in bisbee i called this morning i'm not fucking just in a fucking steam and i call they go yes
scott in and she goes who's calling doug stanhope uh what's it about oh i had a house fire and then
i start to like i go i'm not gonna i'll just, I'm just going to come in. And I went down there and this, it's a little tiny,
it's the size of this room, that office.
And you're not going to be able to say, oh, he's in a meeting.
He's right there.
He's hiding in the closet.
Under the coffee table.
Yeah, no, I, I fucking,
I took the new phone.
I'm going to do this more often.
See how it just sits like that.
So innocuously I'd fucking record.
I'm recording every fucking thing.
And he's like,
yeah,
the guy won't,
uh,
hasn't returned my call either,
which is strange for an agent.
The agent said that about his national.
Yeah, the agent said my claims rep is not returning his calls.
So I called State Farm.
At this point, I'm like, bullshit.
I'll try to light a fire underneath them.
All right.
Is that the phrase he used?
Yeah, really?
I don't know.
Too soon.
Too soon.
Too soon.
Too soon.
Too soon.
Too soon.
Too soon.
Too soon.
Too soon.
Too soon.
Too soon.
Too soon.
Too soon.
Too soon.
Too soon.
Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon. Too soon really? I don't know. Too soon. That's what he said to a guy who's house caught on fire.
Too soon, babe.
Wait.
Yeah, that's funny.
I'm going to have to go back and look at the tape to see if he actually used that expression.
But he said, yeah, I'll try to get things going.
And so that pacified me for about 30 minutes.
And when the phone didn't fucking ring immediately, then I call State Farm.
Me and Isaiah, the guy that's doing the renovation, he's like, I'm just going to call State Farm directly, the 800 number.
And I go, I'll do that, too.
We'll both do that.
I get boop, boop, boop.
We see you're calling from a number that has an open claim.
Is this what you're calling about?
Press one.
Beep.
Are you calling for whatever?
Beep.
And then it says, please hold.
Hi, this is Caleb Casanova's voicemail.
You motherfuckers.
So then I had to go around like
a first-time customer to get
someone on the phone. I explained to them what
happened. She's mortified that it's
been nine fucking days
without fucking boots
on the ground. She goes,
I'm going to stay with you. I'm going to get through to you.
Meanwhile, I posted
this whole fucking rant
on Twitter and everything.
Hennigan put it up.
Yeah.
And Jimmy Wiseman.
Wait, who's that?
Is that for real?
Yeah.
Jimmy Wiseman.
I think it's Jimmy Wiseman.
I want to marry that guy.
If I'm not wrong, he's a comic.
Like, back in the day when we did that silly thing at the benefit for fucking bad animals or whatever we did.
And then we did like the Arizona's funniest comic contest.
But you only got one minute each.
We did 10 comedians.
He was one of those.
He's a funny kid.
But he DM'd me.
I think he has a friend that has an in there.
And he's like, here's the guy's email address to Caleb Casanova.
Here's his boss.
He's the
fire management, whatever.
I don't know why they're all
out of fucking Texas.
But
while I'm on hold,
the number that he gave me, he
found the number for the guy that's Caleb Casanova's boss.
And that guy calls in while I'm on hold with State Farm to try to, that's what I said to my agent.
If he's not calling you back, let's get a different fucking case manager because he can't just sit here for this long.
They're ballparking fucking at least six weeks to fix this all the fucking
ceilings have to come out maybe some walls they don't even know about the roof i i did notice
that after isaiah left he said yeah i can feel moisture and i went back and i went actually up
in the attic you can see a lot up there because the the the hole from where the turbine lets the
light in yeah i'm like oh this isn't so bad. And you know,
the fire kind of got rid of all the critters and the spider webs.
But, uh,
when I was looking at it,
I never thought of that.
I did notice.
Now I see,
uh,
at the top where the,
where the ceiling,
uh,
joins the,
the walls.
I can see where that bubble of water below the,
the layer of paint.
Yeah. Not only in the main room, but in the hallway where the attic access is. I can see where that bubble of water below the layer of paint,
not only in the main room, but in the hallway where the attic access is.
So this is all happening as that water is just leaching down because that water had to go somewhere if it didn't go out that hole
or when we mopped up the next day.
That's so weird.
The paint on the wall where the water was being shot into the attic,
like at the ceiling level, looks like a blister.
Yeah, like a blood blister.
Yeah, a very heavy water blister.
And you kind of want to pop it.
No.
I'll let them pop it.
I don't know what's in it.
So tomorrow is the asbestos
test so we're finally
the first
bits of work are being done
everything that has
to come out I moved all my suits
pants did you
go into the new edition
did you shut anything down
yeah I shut the door and the windows
we're still recording I didn't realize that. We're still recording, so you should probably be on the mic.
I didn't realize the other part of the house was open.
All right.
So that's the only part that's not affected by the fire.
So I got that rack that had all the blankets out front.
So anyway, I get all the suits, pants, shirts, everything moved.
I got to get the fucking ties out of there.
I got to get everything out of there because all the ceilings are going to
come down.
Yeah.
And this is going to be a fucking process.
So we have an Airbnb.
Hopefully that will be in tomorrow.
The next day.
What's today is the first Wednesday.
Tomorrow is the first.
All right.
All right.
Well,
I know tomorrow's Thursday
because I want to have breakfast
at Morning's Cafe because I don't want to
fucking...
Go to the Grand.
I could do that.
Yeah, if you're following
we're staying at the Grand for a minute.
This is cute for a bender
but not long term.
Well, you did stay on karaoke night maybe you need a desk and the jam night would have been cool they have a good jam night maybe
if you would have started on a wednesday it might have turned out better you could have done some
comedy it's got stairs i don't you could work on your set. I know. At the open mic. Oh, yeah.
There is a new open mic in Sierra Vista.
I just wrote that down because I forgot that they were doing that. Yeah.
Yeah.
Where at?
I wouldn't know.
Not sure yet.
I was going to look it up.
Okay.
Yeah, no, I definitely have to fucking work on my set.
But again, closer to New Year's.
New Year's in Vegas.
Come on out.
That's what I was thinking about.
Wow, if you're going to put me up for a month,
what if I can get you to put me up in my suite in Vegas at the Plaza?
Because that way I can smoke in my room and work and get shit done. Having no TVs for football and not being able to smoke in the fun house,
smoke while I work or smoke while I think, smoke while I drink,
that's the biggest problem.
But I'm sure it's affecting me far more than my brain lets me know.
I started to cry a little bit at Safeway today.
I'm like, I'm starting to cry.
Where's the nose section?
Where your face does.
No, when I was trying to avoid, God damn it, there were so many people I was trying to avoid at Safeway.
She just needed meds and i just needed spinach
and i yeah oh you went in the afternoon you didn't go early morning like no no she had to go
right before this podcast yeah no i actually got unrotted meat but they had small portions i like
oh fucking a three dollar and something double cube steaks and that thin sliced chicken love that
you can eat it on a sandwich, chicken breast,
$3 fucking package.
I was very happy,
but there were a lot of the people I generally wouldn't have a problem with,
but I don't want to talk to anyone.
And then I,
I start to feel my face crying.
I think I saw someone that looked like mother.
I don't know.
I am so right.
It's definitely detached from any human emotion all the time that when one happens, I don't know. I'm like, I am so right. It's definitely completely detached from any human emotion all the time
that when one happens,
I don't know why you or like a robot that cries for the first time.
What is this moisture?
Does not compute.
Yeah.
Oh,
you're making me sad. It's just, I mean, Yeah. Aw.
You're making me sad.
It's just... I mean, you've got to be kind of wrung out, too,
because of everything that's going on.
I mean, it is a thing where I forget that there was a fire,
and I go work to do something in the little house or something,
and I look around, and then I'll go in there.
Because from the outside,
it still doesn't look like there's much of a damage
bingo just brought me an ashtray
cause you're a cry baby
I love you
you don't mind when I smoke over there
oh my god it stinks so bad
but you forget and then you turn
the corner in the kitchen and it's
right there
I still fucking even moving all my shit
out of that bedroom.
Try to turn on the lights.
Yep.
Almost every time.
I wasn't sure if I could take a dump there and I had to go.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Water and gas are on.
We're waiting for the city because the city is supposed to give us
clearance to get APS back out to turn on the power.
And as of right now,
I've heard nothing back from them
since, what,
Friday, I think.
This has been a week
to get them to come out and do the
inspection to give us clearance to get
APS to power us up.
Energize us, they call it.
DRI, Disaster
Renovation
Innovators or something. Or Disaster renovation innovators or something?
Or disaster remodel innovations?
Disaster recovery innovators.
Innovations.
The car is over there.
Innovations.
Whatever.
I think they're going to be badass.
I did have an issue where three different people called me about doing the same job.
I'm like, someone already did that.
But I think Isaiahaiah he's isaiah is fucking on this a lot of people have sent me uh and i know it's i know it's just mentioning it to my insurance guy you could see the
shivers of fear when a lot of people have told me get a public adjuster and a few people say that's bullshit they just you know
what's a public adjuster they get they find more things to charge them for make sure that
everything's done right and then they get 15 percent oh so they just they're just an asshole
to the insurance company wait that's my job yeah pretty much i know i here's the thing what my so much of my head thinks you know what
just be a fucking decent guy don't i told him that uh like yeah my sparklets fucking water jug thing
that's probably all full of fucking asbestos right now because it was right whatever it was right
under the waterfall of yeah it's full of fucking fire water fiberglass and insulation and all this stuff that
you don't drink bisbee tap water to avoid and uh i go i'm not gonna finger fuck you about you know
nickel and dime you uh i just want this done and then you but yeah they're gonna finger fuck you
but i don't want to i don't want the fucking public adjuster trying to finger fuck and make
things a problem.
This is like when you have a deal in LA and okay,
we're just going to send it to the attorneys and they don't relate to
everyone.
Go ahead.
Whatever it is on some level and whatever type of fucking life you have,
you've dealt with.
Oh yeah.
Well,
let's send it to
a lawyer. And then the lawyer is just going to fucking find work. He's going to find billable
hours in that contract. And I don't want hours. Hours is what I'm concerned about. I fucking
spent so much time. That's why I loved COVID so much because I finally knew my own house.
I knew where everything was. Everything was organized.
Everything could be perfect in a fucking two hours,
no matter how trashed it got.
Everything, the foundation, all the tupperware is right here.
There's not a lid in that cabinet and a fucking part.
Everything was together, and now it's fucked.
Mayhem.
And it looks like nothing
on the outside. You get to start with a clean
slate.
Get to put it all back together again just like
COVID. Yeah. That's true.
And take another year and a half off
to do it. There you go.
Sorry, house fire.
Let's take
a break. Probably
call BetterHelp live rather than do the read i'll just
actually call better help that'll be the episode the second half of the episode yeah i started to
cry in safeway and i couldn't figure out why and every aisle had somebody i knew in it. Why? Who's in the greeting card aisle trying to talk to me?
I'm trying to have a good wash of my face.
All right.
We'll be right back.
Please hold.
All right.
This won't even come out until there's going to be other problems.
But then again, you're probably not on my Twitter all day long,
so you're not going to know about the problems until the next one comes out.
And World Cup will be over?
Life works like that.
If you're doing a weekly podcast, sometimes in your life,
I want to do a daily podcast or maybe an hourly podcast with all this bullshit and not have to do a podcast when I got nothing to say.
But I did put out that thing, that video.
I'm doing more videos.
And yeah, people jumped on board to fucking retweet this Caleb Casanova,
which I'm not over.
When that guy called me, the manager guy that's got shit back in motion,
I go, yeah, but I'm still.
He's above Caleb?
Yeah, I assume so.
I go, why has this guy not called me back?
Is there a reason for it well that's not the face that we
like to put on here at State Farm and we want everyone I'm like just fucking why didn't you
just say I fired him lie to me just lie to me I would get so much you know what maybe that's what
I do tonight maybe I tweet thank you You got Caleb Casanova fired.
It was due to your bucking good due diligence and retweeting and posting
that he's fired.
And then at least my fans will feel that kind of joy until they listen to
this podcast and find out it was a big fucking fib or maybe he's dead.
Yeah.
Fucking wisdom. fucking fib or maybe he's dead yeah fucking wiseman another guy sent me a facebook of a caleb casanova in that area there in texas it says he's a dog breeder and i'm like yeah it's not enough
doesn't say breeding dogs he can't it's too much It's Casanova with one S. And when I Googled Caleb Casanova, I got nothing.
I got different Casanovas with different, and State Farm agents, but not Caleb.
Somebody pointed out in one of the comments to yours that was very cute that in Spanish,
it means house, no go.
Yeah.
Casa, house.
Casa, no go. Because that used, house. Casa, no go.
Because that used to be the joke about the car.
Chevy Nova is no go, and it means house, no go.
That is brilliant.
Sorry, I didn't mean to say that.
No, no, I'm done now.
My tirade is over.
Now I want to get caught up on, well, you caught me up on Mexico.
What about?
There's one more.
Group F tomorrow is going to.
Group E and F are playing tomorrow.
E and F are playing tomorrow.
So there's four games, and then there's a break,
and then we go into the knockout round.
So follow your sheet.
We'll update the sheets.
Yeah, Chaley's going to be leaving us for a week to go to Minnesota
to do family business.
Family business.
You're going to be here?
I'll be here.
Baby shot?
Tracy's going to be drunk and smoking.
That means I'm going to be drunk.
I'll be drunk, but I have stuff to do also.
Okay.
Oh, yeah, we got to get that.
We got the fire sale going on right now.
A fire sale?
A stand-up store fire sale.
Did you tweet it?
I don't have the ad up yet, no.
But it'll already be going by the time this goes out.
Yes, we are having a fire sale for merch.
Oh, that's hilarious.
When I told him, Isaiah, I said, yeah, I'm moving my suits into the unaffected back edition.
He goes, yeah, that's the one thing we don't deal with is textiles,
which both Bingo and I are textiles.
The bathroom.
Yeah.
Cloth.
Yeah.
That's not what we thought.
Soft goods in the merch game.
Yeah.
At the mercantile, they call us textiles,
where you go get your fucking ginghams.
Give me a bowl
wrong hole for both of us uh he goes yeah that's the one thing we don't deal with is uh textiles
we suggest having them dry clean to get the stink out i go oh no i said i i worked at a dry cleaner
i know but i said i'm a chain smoker i I smell like smoke all the time anyway. Just not campfire.
Yeah.
Electrical fire. Well, let's hang around.
Maybe we have some campfires while Chaley's away.
Yeah, we can do that.
Love that.
Well, let's make a lot of videos while Chaley's away and tweet them at Chaley about all the things we're doing.
All right.
Dressing up in his underpants and things.
A lot of fire.
He's going to take them all with him.
That's how he travels.
I take all my stage, man.
I miss my cat, and then I realized
the fucking cat doesn't miss me at all
because he misses the house.
He disappears, and we don't know where he's at.
And then we're like, fuck,
if he doesn't come down at a reasonable hour,
that means he's going to be outside the door at two or three in the morning.
Yeah.
The couch was covered with shit because when the firemen went in there,
they were really good about stuff.
Yeah.
Took posters off the walls before they tore them out.
But there's a bunch of shit on the couch.
So I'm like, all right, I bet Meat Wigs still comes up here at night
crying to nobody in a freezing cold
fucking house with no power or heat
and I don't want to leave the
I don't want to leave the doors open from
the stinky half of the house to the bed
where he would crash out
so I made sure the blankets
were out on the couch for him in case
he wanted to go up
to nobody but then I realized
I go on the fucking,
we're gone on the road for a month and he's fine.
But he has Dave Rader then.
Yeah.
Someone's in the house.
Really?
Really?
Oh, we should text him right now.
It's a consolation prize.
Yeah.
Boogery.
Please hold.
All right.
This is something you want to add.
I'm going to have to be the man of the house while Chaley's gone.
So it sounds like if things are starting to move,
we got the people coming down tomorrow.
You're going to be busy just wrangling.
Yeah.
What if we test positive for asbestos?
Is that even more work?
Asbestos abatement means everything stops until the asbestos is either contained or removed.
That means they have to come in in space suits to remove it, too. I own a couple of those if anybody needs one.
No.
I have the goggles. Oh, yeah. Not like. Yeah, bingo. too. I own a couple of those if anybody needs one. No.
Bingo.
Bingo, she's got issues with
hoarding and doesn't
she's de-hoarding and doesn't
want to ever give
clothes to the thrift store
around here. Locally.
Panic that she would see somebody
wearing her outfits.
So we had the hotel in Tucson and,
uh,
we brought five garbage bags,
yard bags,
full of clothes.
She's the hoarding.
And,
uh,
I,
there's two thrift stores,
Tucson thrift,
which is really bereft of anything.
The last several years for one on the main street there across from the costume shop.
No, it is the costume shop.
Oh, but there's a Goodwill across from that.
The Goodwill.
Yeah.
But usually like my suits,
I would give to them and they would give me a deal on,
but they don't have anything anymore.
They never have cool jackets anymore.
And then there was the old one called how sweet it was that moved really small but it was always had great
shit and they moved off of sixth street or fourth what i don't fucking know i can't remember yeah
fourth avenue fourth avenue sorry this is in austin austin yeah they moved up and around a corner and
i called them i go hey listen, my wife has all this stuff.
And the guys say,
Oh,
we don't really take donations,
but the owners in on Mondays and Saturdays.
It's like a consignment place.
Like I'm not,
I'm giving you this stuff and it's top notch vintage stuff.
We definitely separated everything.
I go,
I got,
I separated the bags and all right this
is thrift store shit goodwill this is resale this is fucking good vintage shit um yeah we don't
i'm like fuck you i've given this to goodwill so the good goodwill if you like ladies uh uh uh
vintage clothes hit the goodwill on East Irvington.
I believe it is.
Yeah.
It's right near.
It's fairly.
It's two and a half miles from the airport.
Yeah.
Because we just dropped off some heavy fucking vintage loads.
Drop and loads.
Yeah. It's nice to have
a mini vacation up in Tucson, but
now I think we're going to be Airbnb
in it.
Hopefully.
I think on the
Vista.
Which is great. It's in Warren, so it's
close. Yeah.
There's really not much to choose from.
So to get something that close, you're fortunate.
Yeah.
It's either going to be.
Yeah, it'll be in Warren for sure.
Yeah.
Because there are only two places available on Airbnb.
There's two people that have.
I think one of them is the pie lady.
They just rent out a bedroom for $37 a night.
That is not gonna work
yeah oh boy
so uh
yeah up until Vegas so fucking road trip
to Vegas
make your plants sleep in your car
fuck it
we had a romantic
situation why are you looking at me when you say that
I know that's what I was wondering too
why do you put on your sunglasses for an audio-only podcast?
Well, the reason is for what I'm about to say.
We had a romantic situation, and we were running around.
I was running around naked here at Hazard, and Stan Hope told me, those are really nice pants.
Wait, when you weren't wearing any pants?
I wasn't wearing any pants.
That's how hairy my legs are.
He's like, those are real nice pants.
And I thought that was real romantic.
That's about as romantic as we get.
I think it was Chaley.
It might have been Tracy.
It was you walking in from the office
into the TV room
at Van Dyke.
There was something fucking gooey on the wall.
What? What the fuck?
We have to grease the walls to get
through the doorways.
Why not?
Mystery solved.
Wait, what? No one's greasing the walls?
I did not smell my fingers when I touched that.
I went and washed them immediately.
Do you grease the walls?
I know I've got...
That's why I kept asking you.
Are we videotaping this?
Because I would like my sunglasses on, but I also would you...
I would not like you to videotape these babies.
The key to whether we're videotaping or not is if there's a camera on the table.
Oh, tell me there's no camera.
Look.
Okay.
Well, you are a genius in buttons and knobs.
Oh, hang on.
Doug's got his right.
There's a phone in my pocket, dear Liza, dear Liza.
There's a phone in my pocket. Take Liza, dear Liza.
Take us out, bingo.
Okay, bye-bye now. Thank you.