The Doug Stanhope Podcast - Doug Stanhope Podcast #537 - "Bother a Doctor During Football"

Episode Date: January 13, 2024

Doug has some questions for Doc John. Unfortunately, it was during football. Thank You Patreon Subscribers. We could not do this without your ongoing support. Recorded Dec 24th, 2023 at the Quiet House in Bisbee, AZ with Doug Stanhope (@dougstanhope), Doctor John, Alex, Andrew, Derrick, Floyd, Fred and Raider.  Produced by Alex Hodgins.  Edited by Chaille. Signed copies of "This Is Not Fame" available while supplies last at Stanhope Store - http://www.dougstanhope.com/store/ LINKS: HelloFresh.com - Go to HelloFresh.com/STANHOPEFREE and use code STANHOPEFREE for FREE breakfast for life! One breakfast item per box while subscription is active. HelloFresh, America’s #1 Meal Kit. DraftKings.com - Support the show and download the DraftKings Sportsbook app and use code STANHOPE. New customers can bet just 5 bucks on the NFL action and score 200 instantly in bonus bets. We have no idea what the future holds so get on the Mailing List at https://www.dougstanhope.com/. When we know, we'll let you know. Closing song, “The Stanhope Rag”, written and performed by Scotty Conant for Doug Stanhope and used with permission – Available on Soundcloud - https://soundcloud.com/scottyconant Photo by Alex HodginsSupport the show: http://www.Patreon.com/stanhopepodcast

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I've got a list of things that, uh, because, uh, well, first of all, Okie started the whole thing. He's like, hey, put in a word for me fucking bird craters at the Centrum is what it used to be, whatever it's called now.

DCU, do you even know what that stands for? No. I don't care to find out. Credit Union, something Credit Union maybe. Yeah, probably. We slept out for U2 tickets. Like two nights. What?

Yeah. When you, recently? In February. No, when we were kids. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it was like. I don't sleep out for tickets. I'm not, it's always going to be the centrum.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Change the name all you want. I slept out in February two nights, which is kind of a lie because at some point when they saw that everyone was committed to staying in the freezing cold, they came and gave everyone wristbands to come back and have your place in line. But you had to come back the next day and then freeze your balls off. Yeah, that's gone south. Nobody does that anymore.

I remember sleeping out for tickets for numerous concerts. But just for the goof? Or do you really wanted the tickets that bad? I just, well, that's what you had to do. Who? I don't know. You get in line. No, but who did you?

I don't remember who it was for. You don't remember who you slept? I don't fucking know. You just slept out. That's what you did. And most of the time it was just a party, you know. And if you got the tickets, great. Yeah, it was, yeah, mine was U2 and I don't think it was Okie.

I want to say Jethro Tull. That was my first concert. It was Broad Sword and the Beast at the Centrum. Yeah. And I was probably 13 or something yeah that was my first alone concert yeah I went to see Chicago with my mother before that she she is a chain smoking cigarettes which you could do and then complaining about people smoking pot yeah that's funny

chain smoking at the center oh yeah, yeah, probably. Really? That's funny. I remember smoking in movie theaters, and they had a thing that said, remember, no smoking, and we go, fuck you. Yeah, smoking on planes. Smoking on planes. I mean, they had ashtrays for years,

40 years after it was banned. Yeah, they still have the announcement. Yeah, no smoking. Yeah, right. Well, now they, for a while, it actually made no sense. I had a bit about it in 2009. Why are they still doing this? Who doesn't know?

That's like getting on a city bus and they go, remember, according to federal regulations, colored people can now sit wherever they like. I know, it's been fucking 40 years. What the fuck? Now it should be, and just remember people, no molesting your seatmates. There's always somebody sticking a hand down their shirt.

Vaping and shit. Now that people think, oh, this is not really smoking. I can get away with this. There's no smoke. Which is probably right. Right. But flying in a fucking Worcester was like we basically had a private jet because we booked first class and there was fucking oh the first class was so

dilapidated american eagle or whatever american open cockpit the fucking just the magazine rack was like all shredded and hanging in first class. But there was only ten people on the entire plane. Six of us in first class. I don't know what the other four did that they couldn't. Couldn't afford first class to list. They couldn't even get bumped up. Oh, nice reception. Oh, fuck.

Yep, that's my fucking lock of the week, motherfucker. Oh, ground by the underwear. Yep, failed again. Failed again, did you? It's time. Yeah, and flying into Worcester, holy crap, it just feels weird.

You know, like, it's nice that you're right there. Did you do it in the old days? I think I've flown in there once. I remember it. I get picked up by Stan Cohen, and, like, those guys, they were just... Oh, fuck this. Another guy. Anyway, I remember

they picked me up and I... We're cruising. We just drive around and drink beers. That's the first time they played Welcome to the Jungle had just come out. You get to fucking hear this tune Stan had like

a Chrysler LeBaron but it it's like the first car that they talk to you the door is ajar kind of shit the Chrysler LeBaron

yep what a classic yeah Stan Cohen I don't know if you knew Stan I don't think I knew him I knew some Coens there's a whole bunch of, Stan Cohen. I don't know if you knew Stan. I don't think I knew him. I knew some Coens. There's a whole bunch of Coens.

Well, yeah. I forget. Was it Grafton Square by Doherty? Newton Square. Newton Square. The menorah is in the middle of the rotary. I forget about that. Yeah, I guess this is a primary. He used to get torn down all the time.

Really? By all the drunks up on Newton Hill. Wow. I don't remember. I'm told used to get torn down all the time. Really? By all the drunks up on Newton Hill. Wow. I don't remember. I'm told. I don't remember racism that much. Except, that's hugely, at Paxton Center School, when I first did foreign language classes, you had your choice of Spanish or French.

And we all took French because Puerto Ricans, they spoke Spanish. And Ricans was a good thing. But even worse was commie. That was the worst thing you could get called on the schoolyard, was a commie. So I took three years of French and failed two. I've never been in a position where I go, I wish I studied harder.

Because I'd never need French. It turns out, if you do your homework, you do a lot better. It just doesn't absorb if you don't do it. And use it. It's like taxes every year. I have to figure out, oh wait,

how do I itemize shit I don't do the taxes but I compare them but it was every year we'd go to Costa Rica for a while and I'd learn just enough Spanish yeah el baño donde esta el baño dos mas cerveza por favor sorry is the first word in any language yeah how do I say sorry I'm going to need that but I learned just enough that by the time I go back the next year I've forgotten all of it because

you don't need it right and yeah and if you learn how to say how much for the girl that's usually

one of the first sentences how much for your wife you go to you go to Mexico, and I've done Rocky Point once with our friend Joby, and I don't like Mexico. I've never once gone to Mexico. I'm like, oh, this is a great idea.

I've just Just fully paranoid. All the time. I hadn't been there in 30 years and when we got there and one, we weren't killed so we considered that a successful trip and yeah, it's a little hairy going over but it wasn't bad, but it was

hot as balls. It's like skiing, I found if I learned to do this, the payoff would not balance out the pain in the ass. And I don't want to be out. Mexico's like that. Okay, if it was like the perfect weather. Yeah. Still, the pain in the ass of driving six and a half hours there.

And then fucking chiclets. And you can't go out in public without someone tugging on your fucking Yeah, hey, you want to buy some chiclets? No, I don't. Yeah. I used to have a friend named Don King that ran titty bars in Austin on a, like a,

he was famous, local famous, like Patrick Swayze was in Roadhouse. Right. To titty bars. Don King and he would just keep going back and forth between, oh no, we got him as the manager now. He's the king of titty bars and I'd only go to a titty bar with him because he would

set you in a booth, set you up and tell girls, don't bother you. I don't know if that's a good thing. Well, no, you can go and fucking talk to them, but don't just make the rounds. Chicklets, chicklets, don't do that to them. I'll chuck you at 20 just because you're there.

I don't want to... To work your way through nursing school. Yeah, sure. Just don't quit with the sales pitch. Did it snow when you were back at all? No. No, no. If Cook's wasn't even iced over.

Yeah. Had you yet been at Cook's in 40 years, 30 years? No, no. I went back fairly every four or five years. I think it's been probably seven years anyway since I was back last time. I usually do a walkthrough. I guess the city took it over

or the reservoir department. Yeah, it's called Smith's Pond, Inc. It's on all the sides. Smith's Pond, I know that was legally something like that. It's Cook's. We were talking about taking a canoe over to that island

because it's not even fully frozen over. Yeah. And then just homesteading it. Yeah. Set up like a book with the piggy piggy, the kids on it. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Doug, stand up. Struggles for very basic literary references. Yeah. Piggy Piggy. The kids on it. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Doug Stadup struggles

for very basic literary references. I want to say Bay of Pigs. Yeah, no. There's no access. What's the fucking, Andrew, what's the book with the kids on the island and Piggy Piggy?

Will they kill each other? Lord of the flies thank you thank you you're welcome to join us entrance for you we are pulling it yeah we're always on just always assume that we're recording anytime you see as long as australian alex is here we're recording something you cleared those warrants right You cleared those warrants, right? Get fucking laid down. I'm taking my turn at bother the doctor.

Evidently, the other Alex has something unique that only one doctor can cure. Maybe if he drops in, he can explain it to me. I told Alex that he should ask the doctor to name it after him. Oh, wow. So if you've got a floppy esophagus, you've got an Alex, whatever his last name is. O'Mara. O'Mara? Yeah. Oh, well, maybe.

Wait, isn't that like a... You've got O'Mara esophagus. Isn't that the oath you have to take for the cartels? Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. There's... All right. Omerta. Isn't that like...

Oh. I don't know. I'm not in a cartel. Ah, well, you... All right. Omerta. Isn't that like... I don't know. I'm not in a cartel. Ah, well, you... Coward. Yeah. Here's my bother, the doctor.

When I was at Chrysler's show afterwards, he's starting to get a little bit cut, a little bit lean. Lapping some weight, yeah. And I go, what the fuck? And he said, yeah, yeah, I'm on testosterone now. I'm like, really? I go, is it worth it?

I have wondered, when you see those commercials with the fucking Doug Flutie and the unknown black guy, you always have to say his whole name. Hey, Frank Thomas, they used to do this. They have to feed in his whole names. Hey, Frank Thomas that used to do this. They have to feed in his resume. You wonder, would I have more energy? He's like, I get

all the fucking energy in the world. I go, yeah, but I don't want to sex drive back. That's why I dick's hard. I dick's hard all day long. Leanne hates it. His wife. I would love to have that kind of energy and gumption again,

but getting shot in the ass three times, he goes, your balls disappear. But not your fucking scrotum, and this goes back to a conversation you guys were having with a fucking scrotal reduction. Yeah, my balls are the problem. Scrotal rejuvenation.

Yeah. The worst thing that could happen to me is my balls are the problem. Total rejuvenation. Yeah. The worst thing that could happen to me is my balls get smaller, but my bag stayed as long. It's just like you did something bad to Santa. Like a turkey flap. Or if they got harder and you could hear them hit. Get empty speed. Clacking.

Yeah. Have you had to deal with testosterone for anything other than... Yeah, patients get it all the time. A lot of people... All right, uphill. See you, Mike. I've got to live up to my reputation on uphill. Uphill.

All right, then. We'll see you around. So people get testosterone a lot, and a lot of times fatigue, low sex drive. Oh, they're getting it for that. Oh, I see. Okay, okay. So you get tested twice, and if it's low, you get an injection usually once a week for about a month, and then it's once a month.

But if he's doing three. You said three a day, I'm pretty sure. Three a day. He probably is. Three times a day. That sounds incorrect. Okay. Doesn't mean he's not doing it that way.

He's the size of a house right now. Right. Well, he said no. He said he's getting ripped. Maybe it's three times a week. I don't know. Yeah. Three times a month, once a month.

So what's he looking at for a downside or farther down the road? No one knows? You know, you've got to die of something, right? Right. So pick your option. You know, are you going to get shot in the back going out the window of somebody's house? Or do you want to die from cholesterol or cancer? Nobody gets out alive, right?

Yeah. But that's the upside. Like, I don't want to have a fucking boner. Can you get the testosterone that just makes you want to fucking work? Like, do some yard work? I want to have the energy. I don't have to fucking call Derek every day.

Yeah. It's called cocaine. There's a lot of options, though. Yeah. Ride's called cocaine. There's a lot of options. Ride the snake. Coke will give you all the sex drive in the world, but it'll take away your ability. Right. Yeah, and then when you have all the sex drive,

you're like, oh, yeah, I didn't do this. Yeah, great. Now I can... So Bert could have his own disease named after him. Yeah, I do think you should do that and ask for a floppy esophagus to be named, you know, what's your last name again? Omera. What is Omerta?

Omera esophagus. Omera is the code of silence in the mafia. All right. Okay. I was right. I said the cartels. It sounded kind of Spanish-y. Well, it's updated.

There's more Mexican and Spanish coming in than Italians. Yeah, we're going to change that. Speaking of, someone did... It was the title of my first album, but when it comes to podcast titles

that aren't taken, The Great White Stanhope. It's such an awful... It's a play on The Great White Hope. Yes. So I like it. I know, but my first album ever that I don't even acknowledge

as my first one. It was called The Great White Stanhope? Yeah. But at least I know it's mine. That's why I called the last book No Encore for the Donkey because every other thing I thought of was taken. It was taken, yeah.

This is something from the book. It doesn't really... I mean, do people care about that stuff? Or, you know, like, could you just do it and, like, whatever, you're not going to hire a lawyer to sue me. And is it going to be... War and Peace by Doug Standoff. I don't know the bible by stand up the ten commandments well you want people to be

able to find it without getting confused yeah yeah right so the more if your name is like people go hey you know a comic from uh named Jim O'Connor? And you're like, I don't know. Is this like Michael Johnson? I don't fucking know. Maybe? Yeah, right. Even the guy that you did the show with in Worcester, I'd never heard of him.

Yeah. And I was like, wow, that's weird. Albert Kreischer? Yeah. Yeah. Well, unless you're in. But then I thought was like, wow, that's weird. Albert Kreischer? Yeah. Yeah. Well, unless you're in... But then I thought, well, shit, do I even get out anymore? You know?

You've never heard of them. There's a million kinds of out. Yeah. There's a party three doors down right now where they all know every name of every video game that's been out in the last 10 years that's coming out. And we would... Joe, I have no idea what you're talking about. Yeah. Come on in, sir. name of every video game that's been out in the last 10 years that's coming out. I have no idea what you're talking about. Come on in, sir. There's so much information and there's so much stuff that you can't

process at all. It's too much. We all have it right here. All of it is right here. Every single one of us has different interests. Fred knows everything that's going on with the city at any given time, has a weekly newsletter,

knows how much housing sales have gone up versus retail sales versus bar sales, and we don't know shit about it. I know what time to feed my cat. I'm pretty proud of that. I usually poop in the morning. We've all got a specialty. Yeah, I mean, my interests are narrow, but they're thorough.

I'm not thorough at all. I'm a generalist, you know. Yeah, okay. People ask me, I'm like, I don't know, I'll send you to endocrinology, and they can tell you what the hell that is. Specialist. Isn't that the I got a guy? We don't have to know what's going on with the city.

We got a guy. I got a guy. Fred tells us for all the voting. We know the major things like mayor and president. But other than that, Fred, what is this

proposition 125? Do we get garbage or do we give garbage? What is this Proposition 125? Do we get garbage or do we give garbage? What is the county supervisor? What the hell do they do? Well, they manage a multimillion-dollar budget that provides services and garbage pickup, garbage disposal, roads, all of that stuff. They've got like 1,200 miles of roads that they take care of. Is that why all our roads are shitty here?

And then they screw up. Then they get indicted. And then they try to pass it. They want to count ballots by hand. Yeah. A hundred percent. So that's going to cost a lot of money. And it's really.

Those are the people that get indicted. Yeah, yeah. Do it. And they always want to hire those one-armed guys, you know, to do it. Well, I mean, imagine a stack of ballots here for us. Yeah. You know, and we're going to count it. Yeah. One, two.

Someone comes in. Someone comes in and talks to him. I got the Bears plus three and a half. Oh, stop the three and a half. I'm going to start over. One, two, three and a half. What is that from the jerk page of the order of Iron Balls McGinty? $1.39.

But Cochise County, our county is just a really big county. It's bigger than Connecticut. Almost. I mean, it's huge. Yeah, but there's like nobody here there's like well yeah it's a dozen cactus and yeah hello fresh i'll tell you where this one saves my ass chaley um because now that you can even hear the echo, I think, if you listen, of this brand new kitchen that Chaley oversaw the remodeling of, which is now a fucking huge, spacious place to make fucking nightmare messes. I want to cook all the time because I have all the room and then I

use all the room. Then I have to clean up all the room. And then I say, I just want to go out and eat. I don't want any more fucking garbage I just want to have some can't you just bring something to my fucking door and then hello fresh hello fresh comes right to my hoard of of my own uh my own filth that I've created and they bring a hello fresh box it's packed with farm fresh ingredients everything arrives pre-portioned right to the doorstep. Less hassle, less wasted food. You know I hate waste. No more. Okay, I'm going to try baking. Do we have one of those rings with the funny spoons on it? I don't know because there's 85 drawers in here. HelloFresh, please make saving time your breeziest solution with quick, convenient recipes delivered right to you. Choose your meal, select the delivery date.

HelloFresh handles all the cleanup, all the mess, all the, you know, well, they don't fuck with the leftovers. Can I box this up for you? Go to HelloFresh.com slash StanHopeFree and use code StanHopeFree for free breakfast for life. One breakfast item per box while subscription is active. That's free breakfast for life at HelloFresh.com slash StanHopeFree with code StanHopeFree. Hello Fresh, America's number one meal kit.

I had you, Fred. This is going to fucking give you a coronary. I had Gretchen Bonaduce over yesterday. And since she moved here, it's Danny Bonaduce's ex-wife. They had a reality show together. She came here with the hopes of starting a reality show. First, when she got the Greenway house and how she's going to redo it.

She didn't sell that, but she's not giving up on it. She wants to just do a life in Bisbee. She said, would you be on it? I go, of course I would. Keep me off. But no, her idea was her

running for mayor with me as her vice mayor. That doesn't work. I go, I'll run against you. And she's like, yeah. So me against Gretchen Bonaduce. I've heard Cynthia Conroy is running. Maybe. Maybe.

She's run before. Someone said recently. She's running for council, though. I heard. Is she running for council Someone recently. She's running for council, though. I heard. Is she running for council? I think she's running for council. Which, she'll run unopposed and then win. That would be a war.

She's probably going for Johnny Giacomino's seat. Yeah, exactly. Because Johnny Giacomino's running for county supervisor. Yeah. Right. Yeah. Well, I don't know. That's it.

Oh, okay. First of all, I would never want to be mayor, nor would she. Yeah. My mom was vice mayor back in the day of Worcester. Oh, yeah? Back when the incident happened. Your one proposal behind for Gretchen Bonaduce, she had a reality show about the cemetery.

She wanted to do something, tourism stuff for the cemetery. Oh, she's going to. Yeah, she won't stop with the cemetery. She wanted to do something, tourism stuff for the cemetery. Oh, she's gonna, yeah, she won't stop with the ideas. I had this really bad. My dad wanted to run for mayor of Bisbee and his platform was gonna be, he'd only order mine closings and supermarket openings and that was it. That was it? That's all he would ever do. He'd go, okay, I'll vote for that. Well, Gretchen Bonaduce owns Le Cornucopia. Used to be Cornucopia, I can't pay for the

sounds. And she kept all the, she kept the menu on the staff, which was very cool, actually. Made it better. Trip Advisor just anointed her one of the ten best lunch spots in the world. Oh, yeah? I mean, yeah.

How much do they have to pay for that? That's a paid thing. The meatloaf sandwich is off the charts. They got good foods. They got good desserts and stuff. Yeah, it's good. The best? I don't know.

I think it was top 50. Maybe the best in Bisbee. Top 10? What the fuck? Really? I know. Best in Bisbee or best in the world? No, best in the world.

The world. That means there's some guy in France going Doug has been there and you know he's given his opinion well a cornucopia Gretchen bond One of the best times lunch spots in the world. By TripAdvisor. Number 10, top 10. That's pretty big. Yeah, I don't know whether it was 10 she just snuck in there.

I'm not sure. Or does $100, $100 in the pocket, does that get you top 10? What's that kind of negativity I wake up with for real on a daily basis. Maybe she's just 10th. Then it's not so outrageous. How much of the world are you counting? Are you counting North Korea? I've ate lunch in one of the 10 best lunches.

Yeah, you did. You have. Which really qualifies you to be a food critic. A critic, absolutely. I'm one of the poor people doing shit. Yeah, I know. It's just terrible. Wow.

You know it's going to be a little farmhouse. They get lunches from Gore Park, which is really, really good. Yeah, it is. Yeah, Gore Park's having a fundraiser. Is that in Russia? No, that's Gorky Park. No, that's Gorky Park, yeah. Different park.

Yeah, different park. You only know that from that song. Probably in motion. That's a goddamn, I'm losing every reference. Nina? No, the band. Scorpions. Scorpions, I should say.

Is it? Or Def Leppard? It's Scorpions. Scorpions, all right. Just wait. You'll continue to lose things. You'll lose them faster. Yeah.

Believe me. So if you want to get testosterone, speaking of losing things. So if you want to get testosterone, you can just come in, get your labs tested. We'll see where you're at. And you'll be able to walk around with an erection like an 18-year-old. Are you talking to him or me? You're talking to me? For Christ's sake, I'm 82.

No, I don't care what they do. What if you're not low? They give you an implant. I'm not going to do that. They put a steel rod in there. Yeah, exactly. It'll bend. I don't have time for that. You know what I love most about Fred?

You know what we're all going to miss? This is his wake. Yes. You know what I'm going to Fred? You know what we're all going to miss? This is his wake. You know what I'm going to miss the most? His erections. Just up until his dying breath. He's still stiff, man. Rigor mortis. More mortis, less rigor.

I'm drinking the chelada. Brendan Walsh got me on. Every time we do our NFL Picks podcast, which I'm losing, I still have a chance here. You're still losing? Well, this is my big one. It's Cleveland minus three.

But he always takes a sip of ketamine and then opens a gelato for every show. Ketamine is like this huge I know a lot of people are doing ketamine therapy through yeah it's like well, a lot of people do acid. Yeah, sure. Okay. That's good. Well, what was it? I mean, it did work for Perry, right? Well, he drowned right up until the end. Besides in that side effect, it was really good at dosing.

I listened to it. Amounts were important. Those hot tub warnings are real. Yeah. No horseplayplay especially. How did somebody talk you into these particular chairs here? I think you always get a hot tub. Well switch out. What's the problem? What do you want? I want to complain about it. You want a five gallon bucket? If I had nothing to complain about. Yeah I know it. This one has a back. No this one this one's got a back it just hit you right. Yeah because it's an upper back. It's like you it's a a back. That one has a back. No, this one's got a back. It just hits you right in the upper back. It's like you. It's a bad back.

It's a bad back. You've got a weak back. How long you had a weak back? No, it's not that bad. Yes, it's about a weak back. Oh, this is different. Look at that. See?

Someone's unclear on the concept of a goddamn chair. They put a box there for a chair. There's a pad. Oh, much better. Let me explain it to you, Frank. Yes, please. That has a pad that goes in the back. You had to put the chair.

Hey, Alex, get him a man pod, would you? On a chair that Andrew had his feet up on. So his foot pad was your back pad. He's complaining that the pad was the same. You took the pad because your back pad. He's complaining that the pad... You took the pad because... Now my back is screwed up, man, because of the chair pad you took. You got to chip in for his next surgery.

He didn't do it? No, no. He had his goddamn fucking dirty feet on my brand new chair, so I brought him a white pad. Oh, I see. A white pad. Listen, but, you, but this typifies so many things about what's wrong with fucking design in America.

That person that designed that chair has never, never, ever sat in the goddamn chair. They were Lithuanian, though. It doesn't matter. It's totally fine. They are probably cutting on the Ukrainians. Here's one of mine. We live in hotels, basically, on the ukrainians yeah here's here's one of mine is uh because we live in hotels basically on the road yeah and uh so the do not disturb that you hang on your door right but if

you leave it on all the time like we do when you open it from the inside it flies off and i go not mr holiday and has never fucking stayed here for a week where every time you're right you're, so Chaley brings all sorts of brightly colored gaffer tape and just tapes the fucking Do Not Disturb. I think we superglue it, but he can come back at you for that. Well, he's probably a little bit more

compassionate toward the help than you are, maybe. Oh, no, no. Not if you superglued everybody's. Superglued the plate to the floor outside, you know, in the hallway. 32 to nothing the Browns. Do you have the red zone? This is the game. Do you have red zone? Yeah, we can get red zone. How much time is left? 8 so brown 39 well you still have possibilities to make a new spread right everybody else is the team yeah oh yeah okay and they're over yeah yeah all right jets are just have a chance all right so you're okay with that new

chair i'm okay this is this is me get to, back to the testosterone. Yeah. Now, it gives you, does, the energy to, like, is it going to give me,

do I need to want to have it? Like, hang on, hang on. What? I know, I know, I'm figure.

Okay, let's say I want to go move that fucking 400-pound anchor, and I don't really have it in me. I know testosterone would help me at the gym, but would it make me want to go to the gym? Would it make me wake up going, I've got to fucking do something with this energy, or would it just make me go,

okay, if you did it, it would work better? Does that make sense? It may make you want to go around the back of the building and jerk off and then come back. Yeah. And then really it doesn't even matter after that. I think it probably would make you want to go to the gym and beat the fuck out of those people in there.

Yeah. That's what it'll do. Is roid rage? It's not. It's not. It's not like uh anabolic steroids for bodybuilding it's just routine testicular hormone all right then i don't know what chrysler's doing because you know he's probably doing you can follow the supply

chain of where that probably came from yeah yeah it's. What's up, man? How are you, sir? How are you? Dana White's involved somehow, I'm guessing. Come on in. He's somewhere at the mouth of the Nile. That's right. I have that book

on my Kindle, by the way. Oh, yeah? Into Africa? Yeah. Into Africa. It's so fucking good. Yeah, I really want to read it. I look forward to it.

Hey, Raiders. It looks like we're sitting there. Raiders. Raiders. You didn't want to sit in front of the spot that's on Kindle are you if you have a camera okay the library probably has it we could test it we could test that theory don't even say they do it bother a dog fine they're in football just I've been asking about testosterone because it did I tell you Christ you You can test that theory. Don't even say anything. Do it, bother a doctor. It's fine. You're in football. I've been asking him about testosterone. Did I tell you, Christ, you told me in the green room.

I'm like, you're getting cut. He's like, yeah, fucking testosterone, man. You gotta do it. You gotta do it. Yeah, of course. As he's exhausted from... It works. Yeah, but what he told me my dick's fucking

hard 24 hours I don't want that part I want to get a ton of shit done I'd like to get rid of enough of the gut that I could just well it does give you more energy it increases muscle mass even if you don't work out tests have shown it increases muscle mass

thank you for coming in exactly where we were. Dr. Dave, we're glad you're here. From all the working out and training and all that kind of stuff, I'm definitely familiar with what it does for you. You're more concerned about it? No, I've never been on it. Raider's more concerned about his health, cutting down his estrogen, than you are about being great at your job. So he's kind of more of a doctor. Oh I know. Aside from the cigarettes.

Aside from that! I'm very healthy. Good for weight. Is there one thing that's going to undercut that argument? The way they eat and stuff. Oh yeah, like if you're doing weightlifting, for weight. Let me see, is there one thing that's going to undercut that argument? You can't have no beer. Oh yeah, like if you're doing weightlifting, like the guys on the magazines,

they know the salt, they know the salt content, you know, and you've got to avoid all that stuff, but that's a commitment to get cut like a magazine cut. You know, that's a lifestyle. Yeah, that's 24 hours a day, absolutely not cut like a magazine cut. That's a lifestyle. That's 24 hours a day.

Absolutely not. Any single one of them. Also, those people are 22 years old. Do you? Even now? Yeah. Rogan is my age. Yeah. Joe Rogan. He looks like a fire plug.

He looks unnatural. He looks like a fire plug. He looks unnatural. He can't move his neck. I mean, what the hell is that? That's just not right. Well, he might have a stiffy, but it's his neck. He walks around like this. I mean, he looks like Stretch Armstrong not being stretched.

Fuck. You're the stupidest. Who put my Stretch Armstrong in the freezer? Anybody put my Stretch Armstrong in the freezer he's not enjoying your chair no no he was pushing me I if I had it and I didn't first of all I I know now that I had a bad experience as a child with my ass and a needle. Excuse me? Oh, all right. I had to get a shot at the time.

Well, you did hang around the church. He needed the money. As a kid, I had to get a shot. He seemed like a nice guy. God is in my mouth. He said he was a doctor. You're a piano teacher, but I still can't play a lick. So I get a shot in the ass that I swear hit the bone.

It was the most agonizing. So when you told me I had to get that steroid shot in the ass just for some fucking gunk in my chest, I was so fucking afraid. I was just like a... Well you hit it well except for the quiver in your bottom lip. Yeah. It was nothing. It was like the

COVID that I panicked about. I was always terrified of needles and I felt nothing. So when Chrysler said yeah three shots and I go in the ass and I'm still... Well you can put cream on. You can rub cream on the inside of your thighs. Where my balls cause fucking rash. Yeah, and then, oh, this cream is working fantastic. Yeah, just don't get it on your balls. Yeah. You have to get it on your thighs.

Fred, I got a new insurance because I had to redo it. But I had, like, catastrophic because I never go to doctors for checkups ever until he came to town. I go, oh, it'll be funny. So I figured something happened. Oh, fuck. Yeah, catastrophic because I never go to doctors for checkups ever until he came to town. I go, oh, it would be funny. So I figured something happened. Oh, fuck. Yeah, you get hit by a meteorite. Yeah, it's funny to go.

I'll go see my old friend, like, as a business thing. I didn't know it was, like, going to be $1,200 because of my dumb deductible. So now I get a zero deductible. It costs a lot of fucking money, but I'm going to be seeing him, like, every three days. I'm going to go in. One medical check a week. I told you three days. One rectal check a week. I told you, Doug. Only one.

That's no rectum. That's a vagina. That's the way I identify. Holy shit. I have never seen something like this. You don't have a penis. You have a small clitoris. I'm going to sew some raw strips of beef liver around that. Make it look like a vagina.

Some little chipped beef and I might just sew some raw strips of beef liver around that, make it look like a vagina, like a poor man's. Some little chipped beef and a pillow pad, staple that to my spine. Did you have your testosterone tested? No, we didn't. No, no, his crutcher was talking about it. And he was telling me I should do it, which there's a lot of reasons I might. You have to avoid ejaculation or intercourse for 24 hours.

So in your case, ejaculation, avoid it for 24 hours. No problem. And then we'll check your labs. And then you get to look like Burt Crusher. That's it. No, sure. Okay, so the other side of the coin is people that I know, like Rogaine. If you stop doing it, then all the hair you grew falls out.

Joe Rogaine should have been with Rogaine. I mean, it's just a tie-in. You want to be the first person to put that together. Watch out for those pitfalls. I was saying the most obvious. But is testosterone the same way? Say you get a little bit jacked. You're not going to get necessarily jacked from that type of steroid.

It's not anabolic. Anabolic steroids build you up while you're weightlifting. Testosterone is a natural hormone made in the testicles that basically just helps your, what do they call made in the testicles that basically just helps your what they what do they call it in the ad man you know now it's like man man parts that's a bad yeah and's going to love you for it, too. And she's like, oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh, I can't wait for my 68-year-old husband to just hunch over me like those old days at Niagara Falls. Put his belly on my back.

Oh, that would be great. Oh, he's making tisness calls. It used to be Niagara Falls, and now it's Viagra Falls. So if you know about that, I don't know what you have the other intention. There you go. There you go. Look at that. Minus three. Go to overtime.

Go for two. Go for two. No. No, I'm minus three. I need it to go to overtime. Oh, my God. Okay, go for one. I don't need it. However, if I ever needed it, I would go on a coffee.

TRT, the only thing with it, though, as far as I know, is once you start it, you've got to keep going. That's my question. Well, is it testosterone you mean? Yeah, that's what I've heard. Well, it's not that you've got to keep going. If you stop, then the effects wear off. So, I mean, you know, if he's tired of walking around with a hard-on then he'll have some energy without a hard-on. As more and more guys pile into this table this looks like a commercial. commercial running how is this work for you oh yeah the labs that you did does

it test out all right we don't usually do it. And, uh, you know, uh, technically I thought I, I usually test total and free, but I just, when I looked it up,

when you mentioned it, I was looking up and, uh, it said that you shouldn't really measure the free testosterone. And I don't know, it was something about the LH and the FSH, which are, uh,

essentially female hormones. LH versus FSH, which are essentially female hormones. LH versus FSH. We had this whole conversation. All right. Yeah, I don't know. Because total testosterone is a good number to know. As far as I know, your free testosterone is really what helps with building muscle. So it's kind of like knowing your weight without knowing your height or without knowing a body fat percentage kind of a thing.

It's just sort of incomplete as far as I know. But you are the one with a medical degree. Wow, that's a little saucy. Yeah. Make a fucking appointment. I know what I know. Make a fucking appointment. Then you can tell me what you need.

Okay? Maybe an antidepressant for you. Maybe something for your rage. Something to shut you the fuck up. The shit that I know could be stuff from the internet. Yeah. That goes for everybody here. Not even half, you know.

He's still living in a van down by the river, so really, you know. No, I'm in the house now. Hang on. Let me knock this ad out. DraftKings. Can't get it enough. DraftKings Sportsbook, an official sports betting partner of the NFL, is here to spice things up for the playoffs.

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See dkng.com slash football for eligibility and deposit restrictions, terms, and responsible gaming resources. Draft Kings, when you get some skin in the game, everything's more exciting. gaming resources. DraftKings, when you get some skin in the game, everything's more exciting. How often do you have to duck out of the office and go, you know, I think, and then, right? Yeah, right. Google, Google, Google. People come in all the time with weird shit, you know, and you know, you don't get exposed to it all the time so i look it up and just we have you know it's essentially google but it's medical stuff it's called up to date or apocrates uh and you just you know say somebody comes to you with lupus and you're like yeah i

can't remember a whole heck of a lot about lupus so you just look it up ahead of time yeah you know a lot of times the patients come in with more info than we have do people come in and order stuff like I need like well they don't tell me what they need yeah and and if I if it's reasonable I'll try and accommodate them you know but some people like yeah you're not you know yeah I know you you just were on Google for the last ten minutes. We're not doing any of that shit that you just said. But is that insulting to you when someone comes up? I had the black plague. I live in Arizona.

The rats have black plague. So what's the weirdest thing that you've seen? Well, this guy came up and asked me about testosterone. No. A comedian walked into the doctor's office. Yeah, he said, I need a rectal exam. I said, what? Gretchen Bonaduce said, hey, is it still the invite to come over for football?

And I said, yeah, I'm really hoping she comes in because I was asking her yesterday about, like, she's very open about how much plastic surgery she's had and continues to have. She's a nice person. It was her and Suzanne on the podcast coming back from Mexican Botox. Oh, my God. I go, has it ever gone wrong? Like any of your procedures gone wrong? And she goes, why?

Is there something that looks like that? No, no, like that show. If I do it right. No, but I heard a story recently about them injecting, like, oil into a girl's ass. Yeah. You know, did you hear that? It's called lubricant. It'll make your joints work better.

Man, I guess it's never been so smooth. Yeah. Specifically, was it sinful? I don't know. It was literally motor oil. and there's a lawsuit and the chick's ass fell off yeah supposedly their dental is pretty decent you know right when you go where what ten miles from the border here five five miles and when you go over the border you know it's it's pharmacies and yeah dentists I've ever

been to the street very reputable most of the dentists in Mexico have been trained in the US yeah yeah but you go over there and you know a knock oh just five you know five miles away yeah and there's three clinics that I know of that are reputable, and they've done work for a lot of people in Bisbee. Yeah, I went to Martinez to get extractions. And then when we had to bail out of the local guy, I don't trust that. Not long.

Yeah. Should we go? We're going with your recommendation, January. And if that doesn't work out, we're going back to Mexico. It's just a pain in the ass. The paranoia of coming into this country. Yeah. You can just get in line with all the others and walk through the fence.

I remember once there was a tough guy, border patrol, and we made the mistake of driving and someone coming back through. And he's like, what are you doing over there? Where do you live? What do you do? Like, what do you do? And I go, I'm a comedian. And he goes, say something funny.

And his buddies are behind him. I go, it'd be at your expense. And they fell out. I'm fucking going. be at your expense. I've never had any trouble coming back and forth but not go. But you go down to Ayurveda and Douglas and it's an hour and a half away.

And in Nogales you just might as well forget about it. Walking's over easy. But yeah, I just drive across the border and go to the pharmacy and get my Omeprazole and I come back. You can buy over-the-counter antibiotics and stuff like that. Do they ever pat you down? No.

Oh, good. We have a job for you. How big's your colon again? How big can it get? All I've got's a minion. I can't really carry enough people. We're going to have you smuggle some things that aren't illegal, just as trial runs. Beef jerky. Lucky rabbit's paw.

Thick light out. Cornhole bags. Start with cornhole bags. Workup. Oh, boy. Shit. 32 total points. That's 37 and a half. Yeah, yeah.

I got a good high off of that. Oh, prednisone, man. I didn't like that. That made me a little bummed. Wow, wow, wow. It made me happy. Really? Prednisone?

You are that fucking weird, man. Don't get that wrong. Oh, yeah. Shawnee Rouse was on prednisone. Had a million negative jokes about it. Oh, man. Oh, Shani Rouse was on prednisone. Had a million negative jokes about it. He had rheumatoid arthritis so bad that his hands were like drifting claws. Yeah. Yeah, just...

They put you on that to knock him back because it's a steroid. Yeah, it decreases inflammation. Inflammation quite rapidly. But it starts affecting your eyes. I mean, I took it for three months. Yeah, your eyes, your bones. And then, yeah, my eyesight started to go. So I stopped it immediately.

It delayed my surgery, too, because I was... You have to get off Pregnizone before you have the surgery because you'll bleed out too much. That was a lame jump, man. Come on, show that again. God damn it, that was lame. Sorry, your name is not Gary. I know that now.

You're the doctor guy. John. Okay, now watch this jump. Dr. John. Yeah, Dr. John. Look, it's so lame. What's your last name? Sinnott, Snot.

Sinnott. We always said Sinnott. My parents never figured it out. I thought you i i heard you once say it and i go am i pronouncing it wrong since i was seven years old yeah now you know back in the day snot of course and when we went to Ireland South East Ireland Wexford County is where the peeps are from it was Senate so that's the do-all be-all I went to Senate's pub in Dublin and tried to get a free beer. I was like, hey, man, I'm Sinnott.

Look at my IDs. I was like, can I get a free beer? He's like, I'm trying to make a fucking living here. I was like, ah, my people. I was like, exactly like my family. You had like Smith over here, buddy, in London. It was a Stanhope something pub that we went to. It was a Stanhope pub?

Yeah, well, Stanhope's not that uncommon in England. Yeah, it's not. No, there's like seven Stanhope Englands. There's an antique thing you can look through called a Stanhope that has a- I was just telling him about that. Yeah, you were. I've had it before.

I haven't had it made out of ivory. I mean, you could see an Eiffel Tower or something that comes through, it was like high tech for a hundred. Yeah, no, I made those before I did comedy. The Eiffel Tower was the only funny guy on top. That's why it went to the top. That's why it went to the top. That's what it was 20 years ago.

It went from such a well-paying occupation to another well-paying occupation. You've got hope here. Have you seen the 20 side effects of testosterone? Yeah, you should send that to Bert. Is it on your watch? I think Bert

has people for problems. If there's 20 problems with testosterone, he's got 20 people on hand. Just talk to his people. What's got 20 people on hand. Oh, yeah, yeah. Just talk to his people. What's it say for the drawbacks? There's 20 of them.

You want them all? Yes, we do. You want your testosterone? Give me the good ones. Give me the top five. I put testosterone injections. Headache, acne, enlarging breasts. I know where Bert stands on that already.

Well, that'd be all right. Low urinary tract infections, anxiety, blurred vision, breast pain, chest pain, difficult urination, difficulty... But wait, you have an erection? Yeah, right. What's the important thing? That's difficult urinating.

Fine. Don't worry about it. Yeah, keep going. Well, you have blurred vision, so you think you have it. Yeah, all your blood's in your dick. Difficulty breathing, dizziness, mood swings, nausea, stomach pain, tiredness,

trouble sleeping, weight gain, back pain, blemishes on the skin, blood clot warning, bloody or cloudy urine, confusion, cough, decreased sperm count. But you know, if you read the side effects of an aspirin, you'll never take another aspirin again. Because you'll think you're going to be bleeding out your ass in every orifice there is. Yeah, and the number for that is usually 2% or higher or something. And they have to.

So when they're testing aspirin and however many hundreds of thousands or thousands of people went through it, you know, you figure what percent of the population is crazy anyways, right? It's getting bigger. What is the positive here? Well, they're coming out of the closet more. Yeah. I just asked for the effects. Oh, yeah, just ask for the positive effects.

It's like taking Xanax for anxiety and Xanax causes anxiety too. Yeah, anything you're taking a medication for, the side effect will be whatever you're trying to cure. So if it's an anti-anxiety medication, it'll be anxiety. Anticoagulant, it'll be bleeding. See, that's why when I take

Viagra, you get a boner. That concept right there is just scary. So you took the Viagra so he's getting horny. I don't know. It's not as much fun to do the gay thing without bingo here. I just like to watch them. I just like to watch period. Big Doc perfectly. Dr. John, I'll remember your name now because I can reference that in my head. Yeah. He's Dr. John. Yeah, I saw him.

I was in the right place. I saw him in some dive bar. I was in the right hole. Must have been the wrong guy. He's dead now, unfortunately. He's in the same neighborhood. Dr. John's dead? Yeah.

He's dead. He's dead. He's dead. He's dead. I was in the right hole. Must have been the wrong guy. He's dead now, unfortunately. He's in the same neighborhood. Dr. Jones, dead? Yeah, died. Yeah, four years. He's still waiting for you. I kept my ticket.

They didn't tear my ticket away because I still got Dr. Jones. I can't see him. Some dying bard. Not to luck, Floyd. Not to luck. I'm going to eat me. Alex, what you got there? What is that? Sparkling lemon lime water.

Someone brought that and I chucked it in that bin. Where do you work at at Tucson? Tombstone. Tombstone? Yep, so up by the fire department and the food bank. You can get a loaf of bread some fire tips and a rectal check all in the same day I got Plan F Medicare

that stands for fucked I pay nothing just go in just go in and get this stuff done just say I ain't paying well they don't do anything for them they go

let me rub these chicken bones over you Well, they don't do anything for him. They go, oh, we'll keep him. Let me rub these chicken bones over you. Well, if you're going to care about me over 400 a month, this would have been weird. Yeah, fuck it. I have that. Does that mean anything to you? Flood comes for Thanksgiving dinner, and you go, Flood, you already ate. He's like, oh, okay, I'm going to bed now.

I got too many glasses. Holy shit. Got a lot going on. HIV? You know me. High five. Guy used to work with you. He used to go, I'm not just sure I'm HIV positive.

I'm like, we work in a law firm. Yeah, that was kind of one of the jokes from Philadelphia. Was it? So this is pretty good. You're showing me your insurance card. Not anything condition related, but that's not bad.

A $500 deductible is nothing. And it pays $0 for work. Yeah. Preventative care is $0. That's good. Primary care, that's me. $20 a visit. We're all getting figured. Two for you. Two fingers for you.

No prostate, you just get with your blood work. Nowadays, yeah. Oh, really? If you can rely on the blood results. Well, Dollar Tree is opening up next to where the Alco was. I bet you can rely on the blood results. Well, Dollar Tree's opening up, you know, next to where the ALCA was. So, I bet you can get old-fashioned $1.25 prostate exams with that actual finger there. You know, picture...

With that actual finger? Yeah, for a man on a limited budget. Look, this is your asshole, right? No, it's not your finger in there. Yeah. And I'm putting my finger up there to try and feel what your prostate's like. And that's about how good it is. So unless you're doing it every day.

Your finger's like a monkey with a peanut. I can't get my finger out. Do you have a... Oh, God. I need a grinder. I'm not going to the ER for this one. We need some metal cutters. You're going to go to your peers in a Santa hat

and wreak in a fucking Japanese pier with your fingers. I never liked you! I should prank you by coming in and asking for a prostate exam. They sold me shut. Yeah, and I'll prank you with my big rubber finger that I have shaped like a penis. I see a big rectal dilation in your future. So Alex, if I could bring your, or a hypothetical situation out into the public's light. So if you've got a floppy esophagus, right, what are you feeling?

How would somebody know if they have a floppy esophagus? Breathing is worse. It's hard to breathe. Okay. If you make an effort, any kind of exertion, you can't breathe. But also, over time, carbon dioxide backs up. So it's like COPD, chronic obstructive pulmonary disorder. It's just like that.

And I was scanned for everything. I was given inhalers. Yeah. This went on for almost two and a half years of trying to figure out what it was. And finally, someone stuck a camera down my throat and said, oh, look, and we can't do anything for this, you're fucked. You have the weirdest disease.

He did, yeah. Which is why it should be named after you. So you have a limp esophagus? Don't say limp, that's demasculating. That's a testosterone. That's a testosterone. You have lymph nodes. Now, they're... Demasculating. Testosterone. Okay. That's right. That's right. That's right.

That's right. You know what? You know what I'm talking about? I do. Resting esophagus face. Thank you. Yes. That's exactly what I have.

And over time, and the CO2 backs up more. So you get... I'm basically being poisoned. But I haven't run in years. I can't. Doing things. Just on a day-to-day basis like right now I know as much hard to breathe really and I cough a lot and I it's just it's gross so and it reduces reduces everything my life just got this long because as you and the treatment is important they told

me so there's one person that does it in the U.S. There's two, actually. And you're going for treatment tomorrow for laser surgery. And they're going to etch, they're going to scar my esophagus. Put his name in there? You know, he's got it. Dr. Fancy's face. It was here. He's going to bank you and make you some kind of social stagnant.

You're doing this tomorrow? I'm flying out tomorrow, doing it Tuesday. Who are you flying? Americans. I know, I took lecture. He's a teacher for God's sake. Gotta go teach. I find it weird you didn't call me

to ask me to help you book a flight. A lot of people... Well, actually a lot of airlines don't go to Dayton do you book flights? I'd be happy to call you I'm actually flying to Dayton and that was the only one that went there yeah Dayton is

the worst place in the world is it really? I've never been I remember the small milestones of what I consider success versus what perceived and when I realized I never have to work Dayton again that success was up for me I would be booked there all the time they always hated me it was the worst club called itself Joker is

the home of the ultimate bachelorette party Oh which is a bachelorette party is a comics nemesis. It's a bunch of fucking cackling, drunk, stupid women that think you're there to make fun of them specifically. Like it's a roast for them and them alone. And if you want to talk about other things other than them, you're an asshole.

And this catered to those people. Nice. It's a niche market, really. Well, no. Bachelorettes at comedy clubs. That's a big seller. Yeah, it would be. They'll come to see me when they don't know what they're seeing. So he's going to etch it, and when it heals, eventually, the scarring will stiffen it. So it won't be...my my esophagus very thin is very

thin and that's why it moves so much what have we got calloused from like lots of cock going in and out of it yeah like one two three like Ocho Cacos Ocho Cacos what are you talking about real grubbers if the surgery doesn't work

i'd be thrilled i'd be thrilled if i hit the sides holy shit i could have booked a flight home with you when I was at Andy's house. I would have definitely. I thought you were gonna take a train. I was going to but I just wanted to get home. He was gonna take a train but he realized it was not 1800s so he booked a plane. I'd rather take a train. Ease your bags Mr. Nelson. Step two.

This whole house gone crazy. Very specific Three Stooges episode. I hate flying for one reason. All the people who used to ride a bus now fly. That joke was relevant when Southwest Airlines was a low-priced airline. You're recycling this stuff. I'm recycling something I didn't even realize I stole.

Buses are very cheap now, and air, yeah, flying is very expensive. Depends on if you're going with the immigrants. I don't know. That's wrong. Maybe. If you're going with the immigrants. I don't know. If you're going with the immigrants, maybe. Oh, those buses.

Yeah, those buses. We had a kid, our friend John Nahr, his son. He was the comedian that was the mayor of Reykjavik. Oh, yeah, you went there. Yeah, he ran a joke campaign and got elected.

Yeah, like Linsky. His son came over, and I think from Washington, D.C., somewhere east coast, decided that would be the way to see America as he took Greyhound here. Oh, wow. Like 1980s.

Does he not have friends that could tell him, don't do that? Police dogs would come on and sniff everyone's luggage and get pat down kind of shit like prison fucking stuff. And he still thought it was amusing. Oh, this is the real America. I'd probably laugh at that goofy shit. I got shaken down by a closed German policeman

on a train going to Amsterdam one time in 84. It was going to Amsterdam. I was just laughing the whole time. Well, after the mushrooms, it was hard not to. No, I was going to Amsterdam.

Hail Mary! Hail! It might be a failberry. No, no, no. Oh! Oh! Oh my God, what a play, what a play. That was great. Okay, bye-bye now.

20 to 17 final rounds beat the Bears. Yeah! Did you beat your spread, Doug? You got it. Push? Push, yeah. That's a real achievement right there. Tie.

Tie. Wow. Boom. Boom. Yeah. Whoa. No losers at all. He shouldn't have done that.

Shouldn't have let go. That was fucking fantastic. That was me. That was, yeah. That was a touch down. That was so cool. Yeah was me. That was, yeah. That was so cool. Yeah, it's out there. But who's the winner? Is there a chance for Chicago to win?

Chicago won. Yeah, Chicago won. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Chicago would have won, man. That's great. Yeah, no reason not to close on that. Call it and we'll pee. Yeah.

Yeah, let's have more fun.