The Doug Stanhope Podcast - Ep.#361: Getting Other Doug With High

Episode Date: March 30, 2020

Still in a Bisbee lockdown, Doug is on edibles and insists he is having a great time. This is a bonus podcast. Stay safe out there. Thanks for listening.Get a BONUS episode each month by subscribing t...hrough our Patreon page at https://www.patreon.com/stanhopepodcast. ALL levels of support will get direct message access to the podcast and instant access to a Bonus episode every month plus all past BONUS episodes. Any level of support is appreciated. Thanks in again as your subscription helps keep this podcast going. Patreon page - (https://www.patreon.com/stanhopepodcast).Recorded March 28th, 2020 at the FunHouse in Bisbee, AZ with Doug Stanhope (@DougStanhope), and Ggreg Chaille (@gregchaille). Produced and Edited by Chaille.Until further notice, check out upcoming dates at https://www.dougstanhope.com/. Just get on the Mailing List so you can keep up to date for new shows.LINKS -Visit the Stanhope Store - http://www.dougstanhope.com/store/ Closing song, “The Stanhope Rag”, written and performed by Scotty Conant for Doug Stanhope and used with permission – Available on Soundcloud - https://soundcloud.com/scottyconantSupport the show: http://www.Patreon.com/stanhopepodcast

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 You're listening to the Doug Stanhope podcast. Was that the you finger? Go talk. Hi, this is Doug Stanhope. And you're getting high with the other Doug. and you're getting high with the other Doug. Or getting Doug with the other. I don't. Yeah, I am high. It is a beautiful afternoon. We don't have days anymore.
Starting point is 00:00:35 Wendy Liebman tweeted that. Someone told me it's Friday, or I think it might be Friday. Yeah, it's one of those days. It's beautiful here in Bisbee arizona at the fun house i've taken a couple edibles and i am boxing outside my weight chaley is more than six feet away because he's dirty i have a fan blowing on me as well well you should shut that off it's an audio issue i've told you about this every time fucking chad shank and jobey and gang twitch from over here that's the only reason that is the only reason i was fucking comfortably high in the sun or wandering around like i already i was on a mission to go look behind the rape trailer just because I haven't seen it before.
Starting point is 00:01:27 Today, earlier when I was high as fuck, I went, oh, yeah, Henry usually hangs out down at this corner of the fence I never go to. And I realized I haven't been to that corner of the fence in years. So I just went to look back there. It's right there. What's it? Ten yards away from where i go out the gate but i went down there just because you can't see it there's a couple there's some small shrubbery trees on the outside you know where no henry hangs out by the fucking neighbor dave's old house where the owls lived oh in that
Starting point is 00:01:59 the opposite corner yeah so i went down there looking for Henry because I was high, and it's like tripping for me. I go, I haven't seen this little tiny spot. Oh, fucking Chaley. Sorry. By the way, yeah, I went down to that corner, and the cat was there. I'm like, fucking Meatwig, you just. You're not a dog. What the fucking, the log bench.
Starting point is 00:02:19 This is not even podcast worthy. But you know the log bench that was in the rocks over where they put the addition on the log bench yeah there was when i moved in here there was a fucking pine tree back then but i didn't know i was supposed to water it because no one gives you directions to a house and uh yeah it died i had to chop down his fucking nice pine over in the dog shit yard but it got chopped down and now we have an addition over there. But there was like a half a log that sat in those rocks. You know, that giant... I'll talk to you about this later.
Starting point is 00:02:52 But I don't know what you're talking about. Well, I'll show you, and I can't show the listener. We're going to try to figure out some shit here. Chaley just gave me some diatribe about what we're going to do, and all I could do was look at his face. You glossed over yeah tell them turn away like you usually do tell them usually when i talk to you i know i have like 15 to 18 seconds before you just completely tune out but that is also compounded by the fact
Starting point is 00:03:17 that you are stare at my shoes you're not looking at me and you're just you're waiting for that internal clock to say okay now you can put your hand this cheese was looks like it's been tampered with so this time i'm explaining what maybe we do this and then the patreon they'll get that and then i realized he's still looking at me so my internal voice is what's wrong there's something wrong it's like oh i'm looking through you past you so i figured that out and then when you tried to explain how we'll podcast later and i said well why don't i just set up now and you're like no no no nothing could be done now i see i thought you were saying you were gonna set it up so i could do it myself sitting here by myself and high and i was i got scared and i went to my special place no one expects you to do
Starting point is 00:04:04 anything by yourself. That would be irresponsible. I was going to do laundry and I go, I can't fucking figure out laundry. Can't do it. So what are we going to try to do? You have a piece of paper, I thought. No, no.
Starting point is 00:04:19 What you were saying to me about we're going to try to do video shit and Patreon. Yeah, we'll talk about that. We'll talk about that. Well, yeah, Patreon. Get on the Patreon. You know how to do it or don't and miss out on a bunch of shit. Fuck you. I can get
Starting point is 00:04:34 angry high. I could do it. We need to figure out when this one's going out. This one's going out right now. I spent last night on the Twitter. And I don't know. Did we talk about Amanda Knox on the last one?
Starting point is 00:04:56 Just that she follows you. Yeah. Yeah. So we shared some DMs. And then this morning, oh, she's got a beef with at David Spade about something that he said on, he's got some show on something. He has a show on cable or something.
Starting point is 00:05:13 Yeah, there's a billion channels. It's a nighttime show, I think. Yeah, I've seen clips, but I don't know what it's, I don't know what anything's on anymore. I watched McMillions on fucking HBO Nowbo now or go or i don't fucking know like go now i don't know the difference between a fucking oh do you have a roku is that a streaming service or a playstation box or i don't know what the fuck oh wait i was yelling at fucking joe b and chad i'm i can't remember shit they do their fucking twitches at
Starting point is 00:05:44 the fun house or they watch the fights or whatever and they fuck with the main tv and I can't remember shit they do their fucking twitches at the funhouse or they watch the fights or whatever and they fuck with the main tv and I can't figure anything out and Chaley was gone and I had no tv in the funhouse during my goddamn quarantine I almost cried I know how to hit format they plug in fucking all your goofy shit and your roku's and hulu's and fucking hbo to go and they don't fucking fix it when they leave i know it's because you're drunk i leave there drunk every time but i don't fuck with my tv i remember you do have two other tvs in the main house do you remember when we got all five of these tvs like eight years ago or five years ago i don't have any sense of goddamn time at one point i go no these stay on for the entire football season yes because people come and fuck with them and no
Starting point is 00:06:34 leave them all on for the entire fucking season if they burn out i'll replace it but i don't want to come out here alone power on you have to call call Kenny to have his company to fix a TV. Like, do I want to have to deal with Kenny in order to get television? These are the types of moral conundrums that can drive a man insane. I think you're holding together pretty well. Can we make this Amanda Knox, David Spade thing go away so we can get back to focusing on New York City? What is the Amanda Knox, David Spade beef? Oh, I didn't say that yet?
Starting point is 00:07:22 Yeah, you started to and then you went into oh why you were all right see this is why i need this is why i couldn't do this alone when i thought you're gonna set this up for me to do alone because i don't remember so this morning after i broke ground with the amanda knox and uh and she goes oh you have a podcast, you have a podcast, too? We have a podcast. That's the basis of a strong friendship. Well, this morning, she found something from David Spade that said, oh, Amanda Knox, convicted murderer. Amanda Knox does not exonerate murderer. I see where she takes offense but she like posted tweeted that clip and said uh you know i would you say
Starting point is 00:08:08 this about the west memphis three or the central park five no i was wrongfully convicted and this hurts and and so i just tweeted that uh hey i hate it when mommy and daddy fight i I don't think I said that. I said, hey, two of my best friends in the world are having a beef. And then I put an asterisk next to best friends and said, due to the current circumstances, I consider anyone my best friend that I've only shared a cumulative 14 sentences in between anyway i just want to end that feud if you see that tweet i don't know if this podcast will ever go up but if you see that tweet try to end that feud that doesn't exist that's what the fucking press does that's what the media does they oh so and so is having a fucking... People are outraged. Where's the people? Is David Spade continuing on with it, or is it just... No, he has not acknowledged it.
Starting point is 00:09:11 But she retweeted it. I'm going to look behind that rape trailer, see if there's dog shit or what. That's where... I went behind the funhouse. There's not much back there cleaned it all out yeah i think i was looking for a mop but i can't remember i think the mop might be in the laundry room i can see why i don't look at that's a terrible place to look at. Hi. Yeah, don't go in the laundry room. Ian, goddammit. You're lucky I don't remember your last name.
Starting point is 00:09:49 Ian? Nah, I can't go down this place. Ah, fuck. Are you working off a list there? Yeah, I had a list. But I actually got into that. The fucking New York flu. He kept calling it the China flu. He's trying to make this a...
Starting point is 00:10:13 What's that big word for fucking xenophobe? Oh, xenophobe. That's almost spelled the same. But yeah, but you fucking watch the watching new i don't know what the fuck is going on in the rest of the country i tried to tweet this and actually took it down after i knew i was going to get every stupid fucking answer jt habersat even you like i was like wondering when the last comedy show went on in the country because mine got shut down but they were in fucking hot zone viral places so is there still comedy going on in the country because mine got shut down but they were in fucking hot zone viral
Starting point is 00:10:45 places so is there still comedy going on in kansas city like when's the last is there any rogue comedy shows still going on this was a week ago you're talking about the last one yeah and when's the last time where was the last time you were on stage meaning when like i'm trying to and comedy store that doesn't tell me anything that might have been 1993 you fucking idiot can't really timeline it no a place yeah i was just wondering what goes on out there because it is somewhat claustrophobic and stifling when you can watch the news you watch fucking cable news and they tell you about the new york city flu and maybe california is a fucking backhanded and now fucking washington state which deserves the trophy they started this they were
Starting point is 00:11:33 fucking well they were like the green bay packers up until the super bowl era they were the first guy to do like a backflip on a bmx bike and now everyone everyone's doing it. That's why you're here, Chaley. To correct me. Yeah, it's fucking, hey, how's it affecting New York City? Well, what's going on in St. Louis? You were just canceled there. Is there a lockdown? Do you know? There is. That's why the show was
Starting point is 00:11:59 postponed. We're not supposed to say canceled. I think everyone's saying canceled for once where it matters sounds like all the lawyers are still alive it's a new cancel culture he rubbed my wig yeah i said it's a new fucking cancel culture you're getting canceled because your lungs suck someone fucking made an off-color joke in the workspace wig shut up will you fucking do edibles for the next one of these yeah maybe yeah you do edibles here and again. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:47 You're so much fun. Greg Chaley has not drank since he left for what was supposed to be our tour. That was February. Most of the time I don't drink on tour except we have an off day or something. That was only a four day. But we've only had four dates on tour. On my birthday, you surprised me with a gun. So I didn't really feel like drinking because the cops were coming over. Yeah, I didn't want to.
Starting point is 00:13:12 Everyone's like, yeah, fucking that's what you get for staying. It was a suite. I got a suite at a shitty motel for Chaley's birthday. It was nice. It was very nice. But yeah, everyone is saying anyway i don't i have notes i have places in my farm i want to visit what have you have you done anything since you've been back to kill days of nothing just uh editing first the podcast and then uh now i'm getting back into ghost ride video editing
Starting point is 00:13:45 gotta get some stuff out for them just uh product stuff yeah yeah we have so much to do but that's i've only been home three days i know that's what i said i don't know i don't i i don't even want to count the days because I want to keep the fucking quarantine going. Well, I mean, now it seems like you're paying attention to like, how come I don't know what's going on in St. Louis? Whereas you usually didn't give a shit. I mean, pre-virus, you didn't worry that there was no coverage over what was happening in other parts. I'm curious, though. And that's when you noticed, okay New York, someone tweeted
Starting point is 00:14:26 oh yeah, of course New York's gonna make this all about them. I want to know what's happening at a gig I would be at. I want to know, I tweeted that yesterday and I get a lot of good replies because I only follow comedians on Twitter.
Starting point is 00:14:42 What are people with jobs talking about right now? Yeah, you figured there'd be just like an influx of tweets. Just people sitting around. Yeah, and I've got some good ones. I assume people at work who have jobs are also on the internet. I mean, I worked corporate before for a little bit. That's what you do.
Starting point is 00:15:01 That's how you fill seven and a half hours. Yeah, so many people are fucked and it's it's not like i care just i don't want to give the wrong impression and go off brand but yeah people are fucked uh yeah i i'm i gotta remember to i'm gonna the UPS guy and the fucking FedEx guy and our, hopefully our post woman. Lately, we get a lot. D and God damn, I can't remember our post lady's name. I know who you're talking about.
Starting point is 00:15:38 Anyway, yeah, it's time for them to get the fucking Christmas hundred. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Give it to them in Bitcoin or something. No, no. I already said I'm going to fucking write disinfected on the envelope and leave the fucking handy wipe, your disinfectant towels. I assume they work on Corona
Starting point is 00:15:56 and not just whatever you're at. What were you disinfecting before with your fucking disinfectant wipes here? Me? Yeah. What are you talking about? There's always disinfectant wipes. Oh, that's just cleaning the gunk off the bar top.
Starting point is 00:16:10 Yeah, but why? That wasn't because of the virus. That was the cheapest one at the dollar store. Remember back in the days when you could walk in and figure on just buying one or two barrels of disinfectant wipes? Remember those days?
Starting point is 00:16:25 Well, yeah, I would just buy the cheapest ones, and those are the ones buying one or two barrels of disinfectant wipes. Remember those days? Yeah. Well, yeah, I would just buy the cheapest ones, and those are the ones behind the bar, and that just gets the schmutz off the bar top. Fucking farmer's market. I walked Henry down by the ballpark. Today? There was a farmer's market?
Starting point is 00:16:38 Fucking full farmer's market. What? Jammed full. You're kidding. No, no. Oh, wow. Way to go, Arizona. We're not non-essential here.
Starting point is 00:16:52 It's just a lockdown on bars, restaurants to go only, gyms, and movie theaters, which we could only hope for. A movie theater. I wouldn't go to it, but I'd still. Yeah, you didn't go anyway.
Starting point is 00:17:06 Yeah, a bowling alley is perfect for Bisbee. And now, raise down here and open a bowling alley. We used to have a bowling alley. You get everything cheap. Did you know that? What? Warren used to have a bowling alley? No.
Starting point is 00:17:22 The skate park next to Beto's? Oh, Jesus. That used to be a bowling alley. a bowl let's get those skater kids out of there oh they're exercising oh is that what they're doing yeah they're usually just sitting on the top of the of the quarter pipe and no one has even skates on oh it's more activity than goes on in beto's i wonder if we could actually buy betos now that drugs have stopped coming across the border i forget to go there and i like that's funny to three people in warren the warren district of bisbee he's just happy he's finally getting a mention on the podcast
Starting point is 00:18:01 you know what is fucking weird that guy smiles smiles at me at safeway when i see oh really yeah you cross aisles and he smiles but you go to his business and actually give him money he hates you as much as fucking gust the greek if anyone ever knew betos was open that's why we infer a fucking money laundering operation we don't say it we infer a fucking money laundering operation. We don't say it. We infer it. I know. I have my lawyer here. It looks like a medium security holding cell.
Starting point is 00:18:32 I know. Because of the wrought iron. And it's been for sale for 15 years. Yeah. I mean, I think he bought it and then... He hates you when you come in and fucking want food. But it's such good fucking it's good burritos oh my god the fuck is true i've only got the same thing there you know i'm a creature of habit
Starting point is 00:18:52 and half of my habit is letting you finish it greg tailey always finishes my sushi yeah and i'm hungry are you hungry it isn't open, is it? No, not now. I don't think he's... Let's go buy it and then start it. Well, why don't you just buy it? Oh, wait, because I don't make money anymore. That's why. Yeah, I forget.
Starting point is 00:19:16 I just paid a lot of bills and go, oh, I'm out of work, and this doesn't end. I'm out of work, and this doesn't end. Recycling is a... Recycling like a motherfucker. I'd put you to shame with your lack of waste, like using the same paper towel. Oh, yeah, that's right. Not to wipe my ass. I know before you fucking go thinking you're cute on Twitter, cutie pie.
Starting point is 00:19:42 Yeah. No, I... A lot of bacon lately. A lot of bacon. Yeah, you don't want to reuse a bacon paper towel. Oh, yes, you do. What? Yeah, the grease is going to go into it regardless. I'm saying five uses is a saturation
Starting point is 00:19:58 point. You used the bacon paper towel study. You reused the bacon paper towel to make more bacon. When you're done cooking the bacon, you put it on paper towels to suck up the grease. Yeah. And then I put, wrap it in those paper towels, put it in a Ziploc bag. Because I am a man that can't eat a fucking pound of bacon a day in a sitting.
Starting point is 00:20:21 So I cook it all at once. I bake the fucking shit at 350. And I don't know how many minutes. Probably like 25 or something. It's the best way to get it to flatten out. Good job. I need a cigarette. Usually Chad Shank is here to kill time
Starting point is 00:20:38 while I look for my cigarettes. They're right in front of you. Well, they're under my list. They're right there. Yeah, they were. No, in front of the cola can. Right in front of you. No, those are under my list. They're right there. Yeah, they were. No, in front of the cola can. Right in front of you. No, those are empty.
Starting point is 00:20:48 Oh, I can't see from here. I'm showing you my cigarettes, and you're telling me I'm wrong, and I believed you. Is that not a can? This is a fucking sinister drug. That's a can of Coke in front of that pack of cigarettes. Maybe one day we'll do a, is Doug drunk or high and let people vote i don't know what we do in this current climate would you do that where we could do something live and then people could uh yeah no i'm into that but i just don't want you to tell me the fucking technical
Starting point is 00:21:15 details of how it will work you just go okay this time we're going to be on video so you sit there and i will do exactly what i'm doing here which is entertaining the fuck out of myself okay i am five star yelping this goddamn podcast and you can shit on it all you want and you can send me bad tweets about your own podcast and i'll say well you probably edited out the good parts that's what i'll say because smart. So tomorrow, you want to do a video podcast tomorrow? Yeah, sure. What time is that? Well, I have issues with Andy.
Starting point is 00:21:50 Well, let's do it right now. What? We're already podcasting right now. There's no sense of time anymore. It's been taken away from us. We're just lost in a fucking swirling sea of, well, getting high. I am having a Sailor Jerry's spiced rum and Coke right now. And I don't know if this is going to be my last Coke.
Starting point is 00:22:18 I'm going to make it fucking count, man. You might know the answer to this, but like dosage, how much edibles did you have? No, that's like saying what kind of music do you like? And whatever you say, someone's going to call you a pussy for liking it. Hey, you know what? Fuck you. Nickelback liked one of my tweets. How much did you take?
Starting point is 00:22:36 I follow Nickelback because Nickelback follows me, and they have three songs that are fucking charismatic. So fuck you. Quantity. 20 milligrams. All right. Two gum gummies that's all i asked you yeah and then now you turn it into mad flavor is gonna come fucking crashing down on me about what a fucking he's never done that but i was just trying to think of the highest person i know ever of all time including doug b, the other Doug that gets high.
Starting point is 00:23:05 Now there's two of us. You want to start drinking? How about getting drunk with Doug with drunk with you? I call you out. I guess we have to do something in these uncertain, uncharted waters of the skating away on the thin ice of a new day. We could probably get someone namedoug on a video podcast i bet i bet we could uh get no that's dumb oh my god i'm seeing the parts of my brain that are clogged
Starting point is 00:23:36 coated in those jellies yeah yeah it looks like fucking cholesterol on a colon. I'm not a comedian, but... Oh, goddamn it. I forgot that quote I had. I was high and driving. I shouldn't have done that. It was less high, less high at that point but today it's part of quarantine you can drive around after i walked the dog past all those fucking
Starting point is 00:24:11 humps fucking spreader viruses down at the farmer's market that was from a distance so and i drove around saw oh i should name names oh we should start the bisbee gossip podcast who was out who touched other people and then their face get like photography of it like like pi cia photographs of margo wallenberg touching her face don't talk to mar. Start this fucking panic blotter in Bisbee. That's the only reason I'm in quarantine is so I didn't infect Bisbee and now I'm trying to figure out how to fuck with them
Starting point is 00:24:55 and make the entire town panic and it's a way more fun idea. I'm not going to do it, but I have to focus more on things that make me laugh. Maybe that's why they had the farmer's market today, Doug. I know. Don't fuck with me.
Starting point is 00:25:10 They had the farmer's market because they knew you weren't going to get out of your compound. So they could all assemble. You could drive around. It's legal. Did you see the thing Joby brought? No. I'll show you after. Why did you bring the thing joe be brought no i'll show you after i guess yeah why did you bring it up because uh well we're going to close this out i was going to go out with you and look behind the fucking rape trailer to see what's back there because i'm very interested i planned i planned
Starting point is 00:25:38 this vacation for at least two drinks and that seems like eight hours ago where it's gonna go behind the rape trailer and it takes me like 40 minutes to go check i was gonna tweet something and then i get fucked up and i take all the emails and then i go i don't have a drink or an ashtray and that takes me another 40 minutes and i just keep wandering around. It's so good. This is way better because drunk just makes you fucking tired. And now I'm just happy to be anywhere. It's pretty fucking good.
Starting point is 00:26:25 I never woke up and said I should have gotten high. You forget it costs money. What does? Weed. Oh. I just assumed there's vodka back here. We do have to stock up on vodka, and that's something I did read on the Newser, which I hate. Fuck you, Newser. I'm just too lazy to read long form alcohol sales have spiked wine 27 percent up uh spirits 26 percent
Starting point is 00:26:56 up you can fact check that if you like according to newser okay let's focus on the vodka. All right, we got 96 rolls of toilet paper from Olivia Grace. We only got three handles of vodka. So before they start panic buying, let's get into that Safeway there, my friends in the neighborhood with rubber gloves and a keen eye for a need i did go to a uh liquor store in boise they've got the boise's a town that has like the state run yeah the sob or something abc but uh there was only like four people in there because they oh and they said only eight people allowed in the store right i thought oh's weird. And then two people that were also in there said, hey, getting a rush on anything. Like, like I'm looking around.
Starting point is 00:27:50 It's like, it's fully stopped. But I did ask her about Everclear because people were buying Everclear when they couldn't get alcohol at the, at like the dollar store. Oh, for sanitizing purposes. And I go, when I got to the register, I said, how are you guys on Everclear? Do you have any? She goes, oh, let me see. Pops it in. And she could see all the way down, all the stores in the area.
Starting point is 00:28:13 She goes, yeah, we're out. And they're out. And they're out. And then she told me that there was one town nearby, but it was kind of a sketchier neighborhood, that they sell the most all the time, but it's a sketchy neighborhood, so people drink it. But actually, right now, people are buying out all of the Everclear.
Starting point is 00:28:30 This is my course in economics, but the meme going around, thanks Tito's, was that it's got to be 60% alcohol. So Tito's put out a thing. No, people are saying drink Tito's. No, it has to be 60% alcohol. Tito's is only 40%. If it's a PR campaign or a fluke, it doesn't matter.
Starting point is 00:28:59 It went around. Drinking alcohol doesn't kill a virus. No, but they're talking about the percentage of alcohol their their proof is 80 so it's a 40 percent by volume i think is what it is so my point is what if i make it a double i closed on that joke but i'll keep going because that's what we do. If you're uncomfortable, Greg, I'm actually having a great time on this podcast. I would
Starting point is 00:29:35 force this to go out unedited to save you some work. Tell me I'm wrong. I am having a fucking blast. There's no option of saving work. I have to process. I am having a fucking blast. There's no option of saving work. I have to process. I have to go through and process the file. I do have to cut off the front and back.
Starting point is 00:29:51 Do you know how the stock of podcasts is dropping right now? The stock of? The stock of podcasts. You thought it was bad before where everyone had a podcast? Now they have time to actually do it. We're fucking sunk. there's no more road there's no more podcast fucking flibberty fucking gidget.com slash stanhope promo code and here's a fucking another product you'll love you can't afford probably flibertygidget yeah flibertygidget.com that goes
Starting point is 00:30:26 out to selene hinojosa rest in peace liver failure i'm not gonna be as lucky as you i'm gonna die this fucking virus and i'm never gonna find out what it's like to die like an actual alcoholic here's to you selene hinojosa. Flippity Gidget. She used to call me that when she'd call me on the phone, the same way Rogan calls and says, Douglas, me boy! And Tom Rhodes calls and says, Hey, smoothie!
Starting point is 00:30:58 That one's creepy. It's a little bit of a homoerotic fucking touch to an underage first-time voicemailer. Oh, what was I saying? I don't know. I'm just letting you go. Flippity Gidget. Yeah. Dead.
Starting point is 00:31:13 Is that a person? Yeah, she was Celine Hinojosa. Ask Ralphie May about her. Oh, hold on. Dead. Oh, I was going to call him. They're all fucking dead. oh i was gonna call him and get they're all fucking dead i had a i had a good uh like just very every couple years years i don't know he's a fucking kid in comedy i should know better
Starting point is 00:31:35 uh and he's only texted me when it's like uh hey how much do you drink does your liver hurt like sometimes like just asking me alcoholic questions because i'm an older alcoholic and i like i should be friends with that fucking guy i've known him for fucking 30 years but know, there's a lot of people. You know, I'm always fucking, you know how anxious I get. But I don't know if they really like me. If you haven't texted me in the last 15 minutes and told me that you like me, I think you don't. And I don't want to ask you to do shit. But, like, fucking Attell.
Starting point is 00:32:22 Attell said, oh, I'll put this on the record. So if I fuck up atel i talked to him for the first time in a year two uh like he said yeah i'll fucking do your podcast he didn't ask i didn't ask him yeah he's like well i'll do a fucking call and we don't do call-ins but it's a fucking different day and age. Three weeks later, two weeks later, who knows? But you do call-ins. Shane Gillis, we're going to do a swap cast.
Starting point is 00:32:52 Really? Yeah. Didn't I call you last night? I don't really remember last night, but I did this morning before I took an edible. Morning edible is the fucking greatest idea ever. I don't know where I come up with this shit. edible is the fucking greatest idea ever i don't know where i come up with this shit i was uh you called me last night in between episodes six and seven of tiger king oh you're yeah i already watched it but you but i i watched it based on your uh your recommendation you and chad had both
Starting point is 00:33:18 recommended it and i realized that i used to live right near that cat facility in Tampa. And I get a text on my old phone, which is dead, but I did turn it on and then fucking birthday messages started rattling in like a Gatling gun and fucking World War fucking civil. No, no. Lucy. Not only do you know the fucking she went to school she got kissed by the fucking weird guy that has the south carolina tim stark yeah the the the main guy that everyone worships the tiger guy
Starting point is 00:33:55 no there's there's the tiger king guy yeah but he they all looked up to that fucking... The guy with multiple wives. Oh, fucking Doc. Yeah, Antle. Antle. Yeah, Doc Antle. Bog von Noshmosh. Oh, yeah. Antle. Call me Lord.
Starting point is 00:34:13 Oh, well, Lucy St. John has his real name because she went to fucking school. And there's something about a kiss, but I don't know. I'd have to look it up, and I'm not really... with gadgets such as running water and such. All right. Well, the sun's still shining bright here in Arizona.
Starting point is 00:34:35 Sunny Arizona. Come here, but if you have New York tags, well, we're going to fucking take them off and replace them with Italy tags so you don't get fucked with. Because America, we're number one. Take us out of this. Okay. Bye-bye now. សូវាប់ពីបានប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់� guitar solo Thank you.

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