The Doug Stanhope Podcast - Ep.#471: Apartheid In Your Pants
Episode Date: November 28, 2021Doug's back home for the holidays and very high. We have no idea what the future holds so get on the Mailing List at https://www.dougstanhope.com/. When we know, we'll let you know. Recorded Nov 26th,... 2021 at the FunHouse in BIsbee, AZ with Doug Stanhope (@dougstanhope), Raider, Valentina, and Ggreg Chaille (@gregchaille). Produced and Edited by Chaille. Doug's new book, "No Encore For The Donkey" available exclusively at Audible.com - https://amzn.to/31uwvO0 LINKS - Stageman Underwear - Stageman Underwear is ergonomically enhanced first layer gear for men. It's innovative design gently lifts the male genitals up and away from the legs for maximum performance and comfort. Go to www.Stageman.com and use Promo Code 'STANHOPE' to save 10% on your order. Keep the ear party pumping with the ISSUES WITH ANDY podcast featuring Andy Andrist, Brett Erickson, Chad Shank and Chaille. New episode every Friday - https://www.patreon.com/issueswithandy Need more Chaille? Check out Mix Tape Time Machine Podcast with John Norris, Matt Collins and Ggreg Chaille - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mix-tape-time-machine-podcast/id1554596023 It's FREE to join Chad on his Twitch Channel. Go the Chad's Twitter page where he has pinned a tweet with instructions - https://twitter.com/hdfatty Visit the Stanhope Store - http://www.dougstanhope.com/store/ Closing song, “The Stanhope Rag”, written and performed by Scotty Conant for Doug Stanhope and used with permission – Available on Soundcloud - https://soundcloud.com/scottyconant Photo by EgglesterSupport the show: http://www.Patreon.com/stanhopepodcast
Transcript
Discussion (0)
You're listening to the Doug Stanhope Podcast.
It's a little post-holiday chaos here, day after Thanksgiving.
Thanks for tuning in to Doug Stanhope and the Funhouse Crowd.
Thanks for tuning in to Doug Stanhope and the Funhouse Crowd.
We're having a great family holiday celebration day after Black Friday,
or as we call it, African American.
I don't know what we call it.
Oh, that's how we called it that.
And it's not the day after Friday.
It is Black Friday. Day after Thanksgiving is what I was trying to say. That's what we called it that. And it's not the day after Friday. It is Black Friday.
Day after Thanksgiving is what I was trying to say.
That's what you started with.
Yeah, I know.
I tried to go all light FM and then you cock blocked me on African American Target Stampede Day.
Your words were your problem there.
I put a note.
I've been getting high a lot since I've been back.
Thank you, The Road. Thanks for having me
for three months and
I'll get back to you. But in the meantime,
I'm so happy to be home and be able to get
high, really high
and only annoy Dave Rader.
Dave Rader
had to take me one-on-one the other night,
high as fuck.
He's like, I go, I think I'm going to drink
because I didn't the night before.
I watched that Squid Game.
I had one bad day.
I go, I'm going to get shit done
and one fucking Kafka-esque problem
with a fucking DMV issue issue and no you have to call
another state's dmv and dmvs don't answer their fucking phones and i don't know and i went fuck
this i don't need to do this it's goddamn thanksgiving week i don't have another gig
till fucking new year's why am i trying to get shit done right away? And I sat in bed and I watched Squid Game fucking all in a row.
Nine hours of that.
And if COVID were still like a thing, quarantine were a thing,
Squid Game would be fantastic.
But when you go, I could be doing shit.
I don't know.
I wanted to tweet.
you go, I could be doing shit.
I don't know.
I wanted to tweet.
Well, if all of your friends jumped off a boring
nine-hour predictable bridge,
would you do it?
Evidently, yes, I would,
because I was the last guy I know
to watch Squid Game,
and by then,
it would be a Willy Wonka movie
if it weren't for the graphic murder.
How'd you get your drinks oh yeah for the last uh three episodes bingoes is on whatever her fucking she's up at night and i'm
up in the other hours but she was up she's like do you want me to come over and bring you a cocktail
i go i didn't really drink today, but okay.
And then she races in, like her house is on fire.
And she goes, okay, have you usual?
Okay, does it taste good?
Okay, I gotta go, bye-bye now.
Call me when you want another drink.
And then I get to the next episode,
and she'd be texting me, are you thirsty yet?
Are you thirsty yet?
And she'd fucking run over from the other house, from the quiet house, like Benny Hill.
Do, do, do, do, do, do.
High, fast motion bingo, delivering cocktails.
And I don't know, where was my point?
Oh, Squid Game.
No, the next day.
My point was I didn't need to do shit,
and I got high a lot.
You've been home four days, five days?
I think a week.
I think.
Yeah, a week.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And it's beautiful.
And I don't need to get shit done.
God damn it.
I was hilarious.
And Raider was the only one who could enjoy the beauty of me high at five o'clock.
That's when, because I wasn't eating really.
Tree falls in a forest.
And I didn't drink really, except for those cocktails that Bingo brought.
Squid game night.
The next day, I go, oh, I feel really good good i didn't really drink last night i had four cocktails it's nothing that's a a in my book
i get a fucking i get a 30-day chip just for that that book in my AA.
Bailey's is not alcohol in my AA.
So, yeah.
So then I didn't eat at all.
All I had this squid game day was a fucking smoothie.
And then I just didn't feel like eating.
And then the next day, I still didn't feel like eating.
And then I said, hey, Raider, yeah, we should probably start day drinking.
He said, have you eaten anything?
And I said, no.
Well, we should probably get some food before.
I said, you're right.
And I went and I ate an edible on an empty stomach and then we started drinking
and I'll be goddamned if I wasn't the funniest person that I've ever I'll give you this you
were the funniest person in the room but I'm a compliance attorney so that's not really yeah
I knew as soon as I sat down I should have brought my notebook but at the same time
I'd rather remember how funny I was without seeing direct proof to the contrary in a notepad.
I do remember RBG.
That's the only joke I remember.
No, you said some good stuff.
I'm not going to burn it.
But no, then the other stuff was all the stuff I've had written down, but that I get to riff out with you.
And yeah, we get some movement on that bit.
I really do miss doing comedy.
I fucking miss it.
I love being home.
I don't miss fucking travel.
I don't miss...
I just...
I miss every night where I'd have to hope to be in this mood.
Like, okay, now that bit has more traction if we do it like this
and then go up and do it.
Just thinking about your act, that doesn't
make money.
I can't think of a fucking new
joke and get paid based on the quality
of what I just thought.
And that's the problem with the system. And that's
why that Asian man should be president
and automate my
jokes for me and pay
me. Who is it yang yang and yeah yeah
is it too late to vote
i'm not much up on politics or hockey
uh yeah so so uh raider the poor fucking bastard
Raider he just
I wish he were still alive
he withstood it
he withstood a barrage
I had a great time we had a few laughs
a couple of drinks I actually
when Brian Hennigan
at Mr. Hennigan you can ask him this
because that was on my list and then I crossed
it off my list. I get
more important shit.
When are we going to film Junior
Stopka's at Junior
Stopka? Hey,
Mr. Hennigan, please don't
fail to remind him on Twitter.
I think they mentioned
on the podcast
something about filming Junior Stopka's
special here at the
Funhouse. I think
we should definitely do it. That'd be great.
The problem is it's Junior
Stopka's special. So I'm putting this
out to you, the
fucking pissants out there that
don't
barrage them all when this fucking
podcast comes out. But if we're not
talking about filming Junior Stopka's special, don't barrage them all when this fucking podcast comes out. But if we're not talking about filming Junior Stopka's special,
don't hesitate to hey at Mr. Hennigan on Twitter.
Is there any movement with that Junior Stopka project?
Big fan.
Yeah, you can be polite and be a fucking nuisance.
You don't know what to do with that.
Done that to front desks.
I'm going to be the biggest dick, but watch if I do it real polite.
Or it'd be...
You might remember this.
Randomly rude.
But with a take back i'd go uh front desk yeah did one of you melvins have extra towels because uh we don't we're out
of towels i think it starts off one of you melvins what you, retards? To have a hair product that's...
Whatever.
But just...
You start out harder than...
You can't say retard, though.
It has to be something...
I know.
That's why I said Melvins.
No, you just said retard.
I know.
I'm trying to explain it to Dave
who's looking at me dumbfounded
like I'm the high one.
Can't give away the fucking closing bit.
No, no, no.
I was on eBay again.
And I look for vintage Delta shit is one of my go-tos.
And I find weird fucking, i get a watch a vintage delta
watch that has two dials on it so you can set one part for and it's gonna be like 1950s or something
for where you take off and when you land i don't it's cool but i was like so into this that I figured out I could get a first class trade.
Because when you fly first class, we've talked about this so much that I should call this the Doug Stano flies in a way better category than you.
And he always will podcast.
I was finding all these,
like you used to get a hot meal served to you,
whatever it was.
It's fucking beef.
And then there's some smashed potatoes in this little,
and I'd steal one of the little tiny plates each time.
All right.
The one,
the sauce came in.
Maybe this time I'll take the actual full dish and you just pile it all
together and give it back. They don't fucking
they're not taking head counts of their China.
Point being,
now that you get a fucking
paper box,
it's basically a triangle
sandwich from the gas station
with the fucking peel away.
Yeah, that's what you get. They chuck
you a fucking box and you have your choice
of two. They might as well both have question marks on them one facing the other if this is like the
whatever spread like i don't even know what that means it's a fuck yeah it's lunchables and and
and take it while you can get it so i was as i'm i'm planning out, you know, I mean, the Domino's pizza thing that we did on Delta.
That was a minimal amount of planning.
Like, hey, wouldn't it be funny if we dressed up and fucking sat in first class?
It was like we're both Domino's delivery people that don't know each other.
That was an idea and three clicks ebay buttons to buy the uniforms now i'm plotting out
how i could get all the the uh the tray the plates everything of first class buy that bring it with
me ahead of time fill it with like Kentucky fried chicken mashed potatoes
and stuff but have it tucked away where I can have a tray so when the slob next to me falls asleep
I break out this entire tray and then as soon as he wakes up I pretend to be asleep with the exact
tray that old first class would have and he's gonna look over me like you me
with a how did he get this but he's flying first class so he probably would not be the type of
person that would say what the coach would do that coach would go what the you gave me peanuts Peanuts, cocksucker! This guy's got a whole fucking KFC spread!
That's the difference, is how disturbed.
If I woke up and the guy next to me had a full tray of all the shit we used to get a few years ago,
and I would be seething with anger.
The point is, I've been spending two high days on eBay
trying to figure out exactly what I'd need,
what I could fill it with ahead of time, how I would.
I'm Ocean's Eleven-ing just one beat to fuck with a guy's head next to me
that I think is a million mile or two, but I'm closer to two.
Should we go to our sponsors?
Bisbee Laundry and Cafe.
If you're new to town, you moved in, you don't want to just keep fucking bothering your neighbor to do laundry.
Bisbee Laundry. to town you moved in you don't want to just keep uh fucking bothering your neighbor to do laundry bisbee laundry because sometimes your neighbor's hung over and doesn't want to fucking see anyone uh walking through his yard with a fucking ikea bag full of filthy fucking laundry
uh yeah sometimes i like to lock my door
bisbee laundry and cafe it routes well with Safeway.
Make a day of it. It's got a cafe.
Yeah, you can check your tweets.
Get a cup of salad.
Tumble dry cycle goes.
Yeah, I'm sure they have some finger foods.
And it hits Safeway on the way back.
So you don't have to take a left.
It tastes like bleach, but you're fine.
You can do a post office, laundry, Safeway, double back, switch the laundry.
You can stop at Tin Town on a Wednesday and get free lunch.
Stand in line for the, yeah.
Bisbee Laundry. Are we talking about this yet?
Can we talk about?
No.
Some guy gave us two bottles of liquor,
and it was great meeting him and him coming out to the show and everything.
Why do you think somehow they want to sponsor the show?
Because the guy that was the lawyer, I don't know who we met.
Was that the lawyer or the guy?
Because he really wants to be sponsored by Booze.
Well, then, yeah.
I've been home for about 48 hours.
I'll call him.
You haven't even tasted it.
I know.
But you put it in front of me twice.
So you remember to say thank you.
Oh.
All right.
I thought I was, I thought I'm missing ad copy.
And I'm sorry.
I told you we don't have any ads.
Thank you.
Blackland gin and bourbon whiskey.
Do they have the whole, do they have the full package like our other sponsor does we can
co-mingle sponsors when we don't have fucking ad copy when you do that by the way no they do so
great stage man loves it yeah he'll let us do anything i'm saying these are both these these
are not these are products we want as sponsors that don't send us ad copy.
They just trust us to sell product.
Do I have to get a fucking standalone of me and my telemarketing trophy
together to remind you that I was the tower salesperson of the month,
whatever month that was.
What were you selling on the phone?
Lots of, at that point.
Pens or something?
Yeah, no, pens was earlier.
That was my last gasp in the telemarketing.
The last scam was credit card protection,
which I think Jimmy Walker is selling on TV right now
or something.
He's doing something. He's saying yes yeah say a dynamite which is you never heard him say it
when you were no he refused he refused to say the dynamite the the dollar amount wasn't high enough well I opened for
Jimmy this is probably
actionable
how long goes it
you know what you think
there's a heavy
female contingent
outnumbered
four to three but
I think it's not the the the the
feminine it's the lawyer three of them are lawyers and i i just came out with an actionable reference
in a brain that's really not even looking at lawsuits i was more looking at like do i want
to burn this bit kind of because i love this bit and where it's going. And the fact that actionable came in,
is that a thing?
And can we sue you for it?
And are any of you in any of,
you know,
a good personal injury attorney that I can turn to and say,
listen,
lady lawyers lit up the podcast with pheromones
that made me say stupid things, and I think it's a mental illness, and I want to sue.
Go ahead.
A good lawyer would just go back to the other podcasts you've done and show a pattern.
Lerner and Rowe call 911-00.
Sorry, that's the fucking assholes.
I really want to start this, Chaley.
It's called the Tucson
Black Eye Awards.
It's like the Razzies, but
for just shit that makes Tucson
look bad.
Fucking airport. Ladies,
did you use the
fucking... Oh, you drove in.
Sorry.
Point is, you first sat down in Tucson and you go to the fucking take a dump.
Single-ply.
Their Arizona's airport toilet paper, do you know this, is the same toilet paper they give to prisoners.
It's the state.
Institutional.
You're embarrassing.
That might not be true at all, but that's what I'm.
This might be actionable.
But what if I called them up and said, listen,
but I just to give out, I could probably contract with that.
What's the last standing New Times in fucking Tucson?
They have one of those.
They still do the best ofs and shit.
Yeah, I bet I could fucking put this out.
I bet I could sell an article to them.
The fucking Tucson Black Eye Awards.
The fucking commercials that you go, really?
A guy's just put his fucking finger through bad toilet paper at the airport.
Now he's going to...
I don't think Black Eye Awards is going to fly.
Brown. It's is going to fly. Brown.
It's all going to be.
Everything that sucks about Tucson,
because that way I could wake up with my morning rage while I'm watching the
local news.
And then I have to watch all these commercials.
And then I could feel in control
if I just besmirched a lot of reputations.
Is that a cultural phenomenon?
Is that the only one, the toilet paper at the airport?
Oh, no, no, no.
I have a list of things.
I'm getting really fucking high, and it's great.
I wonder if you could give us another one of those uh paid kings paid kings but the the whole idea the fucking learner in row the
most embarrassing billboards they're these fucking two you know they're the fucking biggest douchebags
ever that uh and and they just work out the very trashing the very successful attorneys.
Yeah.
And they have a horrible,
I just tried to say their phone number for real
because call Turner and Rowe,
that's the way to go.
Something OO.
But yeah, they're like those,
their suits used to fit
properly but now
do I want another fucking
handmade silk suit
or do I want to spend the money on
HGH I don't know
let's just keep doing till the
button pops there they are
fucking fake teeth fucking
like
spray tanned.
What's up with Rex Ryan out there, sports people?
I know you tune in for the sports at 40 to the hour.
And what's up with Rex Ryan's teeth?
Jesus Christ.
You fucking need sunglasses just to look at those fucking things.
Anyway, anyone who watches
NFL Network for anything other
than Anthony Siciliano,
you're a fucking douchebag.
Now with traffic,
anyone, anyone,
we should make this
a double banger.
I don't know.
I'm waiting for Chaley to do something.
You're 20 minutes in and you're already going for a second one?
You're recording this shit?
Wait, we're 20 minutes in?
I'm on fire.
Time is standing still over there.
I feel like things are moving.
You're in the house.
I feel like things are moving.
You're fucking with me with that 20 minutes.
I sound like Inman.
You're fucking with me.
You're fucking with me.
We're not 20 minutes in.
It's actually 2126.
StageMad.
Did we already talk about it?
You started to.
I started to, and then I went into something else.
It's the theme of this thing stage man underpants why don't you just how about you title the podcast stage man underpants and then when they go hey you didn't uh you didn't promote us during the
podcast you go look at the fucking title then you'd get to yell at somebody that's what we both need chaley is
someone else to yell at together i feel like we're drifting apart without a mutual hate why
i'm not gonna say pick one in the room right now but
if you had to hate one of those two girls they're not even introduced to the audience, but they're lawyers.
We'll fuck with them later.
I feel it in my veins.
I feel a great fuck with coming on.
Why should someone buy stage man underwear?
Because they keep your cock and your balls in a separate location than your fucking legs.
And sometimes I am the biggest social justice warrior you know,
but segregation when it comes to balls, cock, and legs,
I have some friends in South Africa that call.
I don't think that should stay in.
I was trying to...
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
One of the lawyers from...
I'm not going to say which...
ACLU.
Close enough. aclu oh it's enough say it again now i forgot
apartheid in your pants that's a good one
see now you have to leave the whole thing in, Chaley.
I wasn't cutting this one anyway.
Not at all.
No, Stageman lets us do whatever we want. I know.
Yeah.
Yeah.
No, I just...
Dump in anything?
No, I thought it was like, oh, was that racist what I said?
No.
I said I'm the biggest social justice warrior, so I can say the N-word.
That's basically what I said on some theory but
point being apartheid in your pants here's what you have to do to apartheid in your own pants
you have to go to stage man dot com and then you just put in promo code stanhope so we know that you are fucking living
up i you know a lot of sponsors i know you you live behind the fucking dumpster you're not
probably gonna buy a a mattress that gets shipped to you not in a po box general delivery eloy
Not in a P.O. box.
General Delivery, Eloy, Arizona.
They have general delivery?
You can't send a Casper to general delivery.
Mailboxes are us.
It's not acceptable. Oh, Stage Man. Yeah, use my promo code. mailboxes are us does that accept uh
oh stage man
yeah use my promo code
yep
the commercials are content
what's the promo code
Stanhope
fucking whatever
it's gonna get you whatever
another promo code.
10% off, everyone.
Promo code Stan.
Just go to stage man dot com.
I think we should renegotiate that 10% right now, because I think that was a very epic saga length advertisement.
Do you?
Was it?
Was it?
Seven seconds?
Fuck you guys.
You are listening to the Doug Stanhope Podcast.
So what are we doing? Are we on we're yeah oh shit are we back on yeah
chaley we haven't talked since you left memphis or austin whatever
uh we like we've talked but i forgot we haven't podcasted since you went on some stupid drug head
journey what you kept bothering me during football or something and you're sending me pictures of
lighting and some house lighting in austin texas that uh that that uh back, it was a farm party. Yeah.
So this lady, she inherited this land, and then we're supposed to go out there,
and I'm like, I want to do this.
Where do we go?
I'm going to some farm that the Bretchells know this lady.
I got fucked up.
All right.
Oh, it's going to be late.
A comet came over and stayed, so it's getting pushed back.
2 o'clock, 3 o'clock.
We're not going to get out of here until like 4 o'clock.
Awesome.
It's going to be over.
It won't even be worth going out there.
We get out there.
It was fucking magical.
They got like 25 acres, two stages, and it's all DIY.
They bought a bunch of pizzas.
You could pay for pizza or just eat pizza.
The guy's a brewer.
Her brother's a brewer.
So he's building a brewery out there.
They got all this land, and they do these events, like an event center.
And then the fucking sun went down, and everything was uplit.
All these huge oak trees and stages were all lit with these fantastic colors.
It was pretty awesome.
And the whole time, there's kids running around
and it's pitch black.
And there's, I mean,
I don't know if I'd want my kid running around
with the ATV and the dogs and stuff,
but yeah, it was crazy.
It was fun.
It inspired me.
I didn't understand why,
like you kept sending pictures.
It wasn't like, hey, this is a cool idea for the house.
And you're like, look at this, look at,
and then when you got home,
I didn't know until then that you were on ecstasy.
Oh, that's why he kept sending me
pictures of the trees.
I wasn't on ecstasy.
I didn't even drink.
Are you working for a corporate now?
Are you like Dave Rader
was we can't mention like you and behaviors
what are you talking about tracy said you were doing molly or something
all right i i was still like entranced with the with the lights that were going on oh and they're
like five bands playing and austin has so many great musicians. They started with two white rappers, though. So that was when I was like, hey, let's get out of here.
Yeah, it didn't bode well.
But then the musicians started playing, and they were all dudes from Austin.
They were just about San Marcos, just outside of Austin.
It was great.
And they couldn't have been nicer.
You know, San Marcos is where we played the coffee shop.
That was San Marcos Island.
No, no.
San Marcos is where we did the coffee shop outside in a tent.
Oh, my God.
I can't remember his name.
Put a cherry on top guy.
He's like, we're staying at like a Conno Lodge.
Like, they're just too level.
All the back windows are big glass.
Like, oh, it looks like a Howard Johnson's's but it's like an o'connell lodge the shittiest hotel but he and we're playing a coffee
shop where's the fucking tent outside a coffee shop like fucking 80 rental chairs for you know
a funeral and uh and then so the meat was there, and he had a gimmick,
and it was just all weird.
But this kid that booked us there that loved Frank Sinatra,
and he fashioned himself after, it doesn't matter, Nick.
Nick Aluto.
Nick Aluto.
And he's this kid, but he had like,
there's nothing more embarrassing to me than misdirected self-esteem.
Like if you have,
if you're self-confident and there's nothing to base it on,
it's embarrassing and sickening.
And Nick Aludo had that.
He was like another guy.
Oh man, did he? That goes, oh. And Nickelodeon had that. You're like another guy. Oh, man, did he?
That just goes, oh.
And then he would like, oh, what a douchebag.
Like he came here and he was telling my friends that I really know,
like you got to earn your Bisbee bones.
Is that that little guy?
Yeah.
I hated that guy.
I remember that gig because that was the hotel.
So we're at the shittiest motel.
No, you put me back on track.
And we're playing a coffee shop across San Marcos.
But he had a deal with his buddy for a stretch limousine.
And he asked, do you want to guys meet up early and go cruise around?
We want to go if we want to get some food and he would take care of the transportation.
In his stretch limousine.
Like, I'm not taking a stretch limousine from the fucking most like
decrepit fucking Econo Lodge on a highway exit ramp
to a tent at a coffee shop
in a stretched limo.
That hotel.
I should have done. I think we did
do it, actually.
We did get in the limo at some point.
We didn't get there in a limo.
That hotel, we checked in.
I went to the bed
to just pull back. I always take off the top cover.
I went to pull back the just pull back, to always take off the top cover. I went to pull back just the sheet, and there was a cockroach under.
Like they made the bed on top of the cockroach, and then that's when I go,
here, Doug, I'll cut your hair inside here.
You wanted me to cut your hair, and I said, let's do it out of the step.
But I shaved your head, that weird thing.
Yeah, yeah.
Hair all over.
Friar tuck. Yeah. yeah. The hair all over. Friar Tuck.
Yeah.
That place was so disgusting.
Yeah, and that gig was just deuce chills thinking about it.
Meat Sticks wanting to do a gag to where he goes,
I know, but at the same time,
we don't have a lot of stories from the fucking Funny Bone tour, do we?
That's true.
I blame the audiences.
There's too many of you.
When there was only like 18 people coming to see me, we'd all go out and fucking party,
and Andy would steal your drugs.
What is Andy, Issues with Andyy come out what time is that because i want to set my dvr
friday's at 9 a.m we follow a good morning uh la
i think it's too late in the podcast but i was gonna tell Valentina, you can bring them in there. It's a smoke-free
environment in the main house.
I'm starting to have a hard time seeing them
with haze.
I don't know if they just want to go.
When you're in a position
where you have to be polite.
No, I think they're fine.
My two friends are here from California and Alabama
and we were all public
defenders together in Alabama. Doug's being a really good host well i had to do a podcast but
that's when i first met manson he's like hey you want to come to my producer's house and
listen to a cut of my new album and i fucking hate music like yeah we just met him so when we go up
in the fucking hollywood hills and we're sitting in the exact thing you would picture of a producer's
house that has his own sound booth but it looks over the kitchen where his wife is making scampi
or whatever and uh and i'm just i, all I want to do is smoke cigarettes.
Like,
just like,
okay.
And then all the fucking Hollywood talk and,
okay,
can we just hear this and leave?
Grinding my fucking fingernail into the grooves as I'm saying this.
And,
and I found one song
that I fucking love
and I still use
to open or close
a show depending on how I feel
about you and that
was the saving grace of otherwise
like what because you're
looking at you a guy who knows
nothing about music and doesn't like it
because it's blocking the discourse of decent conversation like we're having now.
Skintillating is what I say because I put a hook into everything.
I better go.
Manson had a preview party for Doug to listen to Pale Emperor
and Doug actually
liked the one song that was
the biggest hit off that
then I had to have dinner with the fucking producer
and his wife and Manson is trying
to be
magnanimous and stuff for
decent or
to the like
point being
it was an awful night and thank god killing strangers
is the one thing that good because oh my god i don't know how this ties into them
oh yeah that's how you might be having to listen to my fucking new album and there's no
jokes in it it's just me high yelling into a microphone
and you have no idea why we would
have to do this year after year.
They asked me, how long has your podcast
been on? I'm like, I don't know.
How long, Joey?
April will be eight years.
Wow.
Alright, I'm gonna
be here for that one.
Was the guy's name Tylerler bates the producer of what manson's manson's oh i don't know jesus we're i thought i thought we would recognize
i forget what we're talking about this is the best part of being high is uh i don't yeah this is fun
there's probably no one else having fun with me out there in listener land hey listeners this is
doug stanhope i'm i'm right there with you i'm in your brain i'm i'm like a polyp or a cyst, or some kind of lesion that is not benign.
Not benign, listener.
Whatever that turns out to be, I'm going to see you on the other side.
Traffic and weather together on the fives and tens on the Doug Stano podcast.
Hey, bingo, take us out of here light FM style.
One, two, three.
Okay, bye-bye now.
That was not light FM style.
Let's try it again.
A little okay.
Okay, bye-bye now.
Okay, bye-bye now.
Okay, bye-bye now.
Oh, my God.
Yeah, that edible worked.
You think? សូវាប់ពីបានប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពីប់ពី Thank you.