The F Plus - 141: We're Gonna Need A Bigger Scrote

Episode Date: June 28, 2014

With sex still being something of a taboo subject, feelings of sexual inadequacy can be complicated. Are you emotionally strong enough to provide a sexual experience that's mutually enjoyed as ad...venture, discovery, love and combat? Probably not, so how about you just yank on your wang for about 12 hours and see if that makes things any better. This is the topic of penis enlargement. Does it work? You might be surprised to find out how inconsequential the answer to that question is. This week, The F Plus LOVES THE BEACH!

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Starting point is 00:00:00 I asked my woman what could I do to make her happy and keep her true she said darling darling all I want from you is a tiny little piece of your big bamboo. She want a big bamboo, get up big and long. The big bamboo, get up big and strong. The big bamboo, rise up great and tall. The big bamboo, please, it's one and all. This is the F+, your place for terrible but huge things, read with enthusiasm.
Starting point is 00:00:45 In the room tonight, we have Rockwaddle. My techniques will revolutionaries. Assessment driven BPEL objectives to close the TDWD achievement gap. Alright, Frank West. My technique is clowning. It's where you take your dick, fill it up with helium, tie it up, and turn it into
Starting point is 00:01:01 a balloon animal. Boots Ranger! My technique is to cover my penis entirely with sleep buddy. LeftHanderRadio.com, Adam Bozarth. It's called the porcupine technique. You put a porcupine on your penis, and it's big as a porcupine. Problem solved. And lemon. I need to figure out a way to get this gay porn off!
Starting point is 00:01:21 Here is something that you sexy ladies out there would like to know. Where you can get a bamboo as wonderful as can be. After the show, come backstage and ask for me. I've got a big bamboo, get up big and long. The big bamboo, get up big and strong. The big bamboo, rise big and strong The big bamboo rise up great and tall The big bamboo Blizz is one and all
Starting point is 00:01:52 Hey F+, Hey Lemon Hey Lemon How are your dicks? How is my dick? Sort of secured, and it's locked in full upright position. That's terrific. Good.
Starting point is 00:02:11 Are any of you, like, disappointed, like, in the performance of your dick, the appearance of your dick? Oh, Lemon, my life is disappointment. Okay, yeah, and your life is mainly penis-centric, so... Well, yeah. Do you think that your life would be improved with a better dick? Well, what have I got to lose, right? If I just go a little bit more to the right, that'd be great. Well, we are going to be looking at the topic of penis enlargement.
Starting point is 00:02:38 The sane, sane community of penis enlargement. This is a forum called Thunder's Place. Oh, I can make it thunderous, I guess. Maybe your cock is like the hammer of Thor kind of thing. Shit! I'm sold already. And that only the worthy can hold it? In that it doesn't exist.
Starting point is 00:02:57 So, this is Thunder's Place. It extensively covers penis enlargement in various forms. Penis enlargement, penis hangers, penis extenders, penis pumps, penis enlargement basics, penis enlargement creams. I mean, really, they have looked into everything about penis enlargement. So we're going to start out here with Fire Goat. He's a moderator.
Starting point is 00:03:22 He sounds a lot like Adam Bozarth. What? And he's donated to the forum. So thanks a lot, Fire Goat, for keeping this dream alive. Okay. So, Fire Goat, where are you located, by the way? Up a tree. Where else would I be?
Starting point is 00:03:39 Huh. Oh. That's a great question. I don't know. I don't know. You got me. Because goats live in trees. I think he means, like, up the tree in someone else's backyard.
Starting point is 00:03:50 Is that an expression? So tell me about what you want to talk about here. Subliminal P.E. Try it. Fizz Ed? Can I get out of going to gym if I do it in my mind? Yeah, take a lap. Take a lap in the astral plane.
Starting point is 00:04:08 Sure, doing it. Oh, I was really fast. I was working with an athlete recently, and his performance was less than expected from his level of fitness. His mind was getting in the way of what he could achieve. Conscious positive affirmations work well for guys who are positive, but as his problem was negativity, so he struggled with conscious affirmations. Wait, is this about dicks? What does it mean you were working with? His dick was just a bummer.
Starting point is 00:04:37 Well, I think he's a penis coach. Literally, I think Firecoat is a penis coach. I need another 50 push-ups from you right now. Do it. You call those kegels? Self-hypnosis takes time to learn. He needed quick results. So I decided to go with subliminals for him.
Starting point is 00:04:58 I worked so well, I thought, why not apply them to PE? Okay, sure. All right. Yeah, yeah. Here's them to PE? Okay, sure. All right. Yeah, yeah. Here's how you can try them, too. You know what? Actually, there's some text there that's not super great. So we're just going to...
Starting point is 00:05:15 Can you just give me examples of good subliminal messages? Okay, yeah. Like good subliminal penis enlargement messages? So should I be taking my shorts off now? Yeah. Oh, come on. It should have been off. I'm behind.
Starting point is 00:05:30 It's okay. There's lots of time to get in the game. As you guys are taking off your shorts, let me give you an example of good subliminal messages. Alright. My flaccid is 6x5. Square? Or I guess rectangular? Rectangle, yeah. My flaccid is 6x5. Square? Or I guess rectangular?
Starting point is 00:05:45 Rectangle, yeah. My flaccid is 6x5. I have an 8x6 erect cock. I get hard easily. My orgasms are powerful. My cock grows easily. I love my cock. My flaccid is heavy.
Starting point is 00:06:00 My flaccid is soft and relaxed. I stay hard for as long as I want. I stay hard after I cum. I want. I stay hard after I come. I can have multiple orgasms. My cock gets rock hard! Oh! My cock is bigger every day.
Starting point is 00:06:16 You don't have to stick to those. Make up your own! How subliminal are these messages? Yeah, you have to record them, backward mask them, and then listen to them while you're asleep. Is this like eating a cereal and
Starting point is 00:06:32 puts a big bite of Cheerios in his mouth? I have a crack crack. Yeah, that made sense. Alright. So this thread is called, Can Visualization Alone Increase Length and Girth? My name is James456.
Starting point is 00:06:49 I am a new member. And I just want to talk to you about the following here. Hey, guys, there's some interesting re-evaluations in the scientific community that have been bubbling around for the last five years, one of which is mind over matter. That's what all the scientists are talking about these days. Right. There are scientific studies done and papers produced indicating that people can increase
Starting point is 00:07:13 muscular strength simply by visualizing the movements and muscles. In light of these recent findings, has anyone tried or thinking of trying specific visualization to aid the growth of their penis? Tried or thinking of trying the slogan of the internet. I've been thinking of trying a lot of that, yeah. Boots, you are a clubber.
Starting point is 00:07:36 I am a clubber. Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do- He wants it really bad. Frank West, on page two, you are Mr. Schlong. I sure am. That's my name. That name again is Mr. Schlong. Oprah had some guy a few years ago on her show who underwent hypnosis to enlarge his penis. She, of course, made fun of him when he said he gained half his length by hypnosis. He said he gained half his length by hypnosis he said he gained half his length her reply so what you have now half an inch biatch did she like do a guitar solo after that i
Starting point is 00:08:37 feel like i want to look it up on snopes but snopes would be like you're an idiot of course this never happens just a big fucking like it doesn't even answer the question just you're an idiot. Of course this never happens. Just a big fucking, like it doesn't even answer the question. Just like a disdainful look from a librarian. ACR, you are person 9009. People are so anonymous
Starting point is 00:08:57 on this thing. Person 9009, which is me. Hi, I have a diploma in personal training and this issue came up on my course. It is possible to increase strength through various concentration techniques, as the strength of a muscle is governed by how much neural innervation there is of that muscle,
Starting point is 00:09:13 as well as its physical size. By focusing on using a muscle, you can improve the tonality, the frequency, and amount of electrical impulses of the electrical messages that get sent to that muscle. This alien is doing a piss-poor job of convincing everybody else that he's human. Reading the science behind how PE works, I don't think this applies.
Starting point is 00:09:30 It won't make you bigger. Strength and size are two different things. If you want to think it bigger, I suggest keep doing PE exercises and using focusing-slash-relaxation techniques to speed up the recovery of your tissues. Tissues. Hypnotists apply a relaxation technique that allows people to relax.
Starting point is 00:09:50 It's similar to meditation. You can learn to relax particular muscles of your body through concentration. This will improve blood flow to this area, speed in recovery, and growth. Yep. All right. Well, that sounds like super science-y. Like, I'm into it. He used several science terms.
Starting point is 00:10:07 Well, he does have a diploma in personal training. Science. Okay, so there's a lot of different, there's obviously the piece there on thinking yourself hard, or thinking yourself big. But there's other pieces as well. This technique is called the man hammer exercise. My name is wannabe 8-incher.
Starting point is 00:10:36 Please let this involve a real hammer. Let's find out. Wannabe 8-incher. I'm in Canada. I registered in September 2008. The man hammer exercise. Let's find out. Want to be 8-incher? I'm in Canada. I registered in September 2008. The man hammer exercise. Number one, clamp a towel to your man hammer.
Starting point is 00:10:51 What? Clamp the towel? Like with a clamp. With a clamp? Right. Okay. Wait, no. There's two steps.
Starting point is 00:10:59 That was only step one. Step two is soak the towel to add weight. Wait. Oh. Oh, wait. You want to know where the science is? Well, here's the towel to add weight. Wait. Oh. Oh, wait. You want to know where the science is. Well, here's the science. The science.
Starting point is 00:11:14 Hot water from the shower causes legs to be loose and good for towel hanging. Safety measures. Avoid stepping on the towel. This is like a hammer how? The man hammer. Yeah, the man hammer. The man hammer is hanging from this lower abdominal area. I'm sorry, I'm confused.
Starting point is 00:11:35 I thought this was about penises, not hammers. Right. This needs to be something to do with the penis, and I was looking for some sort of manly hammering technique. Okay, basically, while showering, clamp a wet towel onto the man unit, then allow the towel to slowly soak as it gets wet. It will still weigh down your clobber monger. What?
Starting point is 00:11:59 Okay, this guy doesn't have a penis. No, that's how we talk. Man unit, clobber hunger, pant meat. A fishmonger is somebody that sells fish, so a clobbermonger would be somebody that sells clobberings. The clobbermonger was one of my favorite wrestlers back in the 90s. Who wants to get beat up? Who wants to get beat up? Who wants to get beat up?
Starting point is 00:12:26 I do, I do. The key is to do a hammering motion to apply downward torque to the weight of the towel so it is never constant. You don't want your man hammer to get used to it. A wet towel is perfect because fully wet, it is about 15 pounds, and you can squeeze some water out to adjust the weight according to how much hanging you want to do. I recommend getting an anti-slip
Starting point is 00:12:49 mat for your shower, as this kind of motion could cause you to slip, step on the towel, and tear something. Basically, when you apply downforce to the towel, the 15-pound towel becomes more like 25 pounds for a slight second. Basically, you imagine there is a nail, and you
Starting point is 00:13:06 are trying to hammer it with your unit. Yeah, this is how David Carradine died. Oh! That might be true. It gives you an excellent stretch, and because you need to shower anyway, you don't need to make exclusive time for PE in your day. Just integrate it, which is nice.
Starting point is 00:13:29 By soaking a towel, an entire towel, like we all do. Simplifies. And clamping it to your dick. So you just got to conveniently keep a C-clamp in your shower. In the middle, he goes through a lot of detail, but at the very beginning, he's just clamping. Everybody knows how to clamp a towel to your dick. To your very small dick.
Starting point is 00:13:50 With this group of people, that may very well be true. You guys all went to camp. What do you guys think? Everyone says, oh, that sounds like a great idea. No, no, no, no. I think it would be a good idea to weigh the talibun fully soaked. Using 15 pounds willy-nilly might be dangerous for us noobs. You need to work up to it.
Starting point is 00:14:14 Yeah. Have your manhammer eureka moment. Okay, so as I said, lots of different methods going on here. One of the methods that we're going to touch on a lot is jelking. Can I cut in for a little bit? Yeah, absolutely. Because Wannabe8incher goes into more detail a little bit later on, and he advocates that if you're stretching your foreskin, use one clamp.
Starting point is 00:14:43 If you're stretching your dick, you have to use many clamps because it helps to avoid the, and I quote, turkey neck ball sack effect, unquote. Wow! Oh, that is really gross. Wow. That's an effect, huh? It is.
Starting point is 00:15:01 All right, I'm going to do a search on the page for tricky neck ball sack. You said Google image search, right? Yeah. Ball sack is hyphenated. Oh, I found one thread, the man hammer exercise. Okay. So anyway, as I said, lots of methodologies here. But one methodology that comes up frequently is the method of jelking.
Starting point is 00:15:24 Now, there's a lot of threads that would explain what jelking is, but they're long, so let me just explain it. Jerking your cock. It's pretty much... That's it. You jerk your cock and you pretend like it's not masturbating. It's some sort of
Starting point is 00:15:39 therapy, and that's what jelking is. But, ICM here has a fun deviation to jelking, which is called behind-the-balls jelking.
Starting point is 00:15:55 Adam, will you tell us about BTB jelking, please? BTB jelking. For those who do not know, BTB jelking is behind-the-balls jelking. For those who do not know, BTB Jelking is Behind the Balls Jelking. Not a highly discussed topic these days. I know Bibb is an advocate. Anyone else believe in it?
Starting point is 00:16:15 Why won't this be in the Situation Room? Wolf Brinsels are afraid of the truth. I'm thinking that I'd like to incorporate it into my routine, but I'm worried about putting pressure there. It's probably rubbish, but I seem to remember reading that that point is a sensitive
Starting point is 00:16:33 point in some Far Eastern acupuncture-like therapy. Also, when doing it, for those who do, do you just lube up and press it at the base, moving
Starting point is 00:16:49 towards your balls? For those who do, do. Frank West, you are SS for Jelk. The German Secret Service for Jelk. Hey dude, Bibb told me of BTB Jelking ages ago.
Starting point is 00:17:05 I think it is a fantastic exercise. Think of your penis, as I'm sure you do, very often. The inner penis is before the outer penis. What? Okay, I'm thinking of my penis.
Starting point is 00:17:22 Apparently, yours is very different. Before you make changes to the penis, you must visualize my penis. But apparently yours is very different. Before you make changes to the penis, you must visualize the penis. Now, if you were to manually increase the size of the blood vessels or whatever that lead to the outer penis, do you think it would
Starting point is 00:17:37 increase the blood flow to the penis and also your erection strength? Yep, it would. This is another alien. What is an inner and outer... Baby, I'm sorry. I like you a lot. I just don't trust you around my inner penis yet.
Starting point is 00:17:55 One day I'm sure we'll get to that point, but can you just deal with the outer penis until then? Do you think that if you increase the size of our legs and or tunica it would result in gains yes it would oh all right remember yeah i answered that one it's a tough question i understand but remember that if the blood flow to the penis is not improved the gains will never realize as there will not be enough blood to expand the cc and cs to their new size i i don't know what some of these like parts of anatomy they're referring to are i i realize they got to be someplace down there and it just makes me have phantom pains where i think if you hover over cc and cs it
Starting point is 00:18:38 will tell you what they are i don't i don't want to know but i'm gonna look it's the corporate cavern wow cavernosa penis i just get a little question mark like why why would you want to know, but I'm going to look. It's the corporate cavernosa penis. I just get a little question mark. Like, why would you want to... Oh, there it is. Why would you... The question mark is, are you sure? Are you sure you want to know?
Starting point is 00:18:52 Do you really want to know this? I mean, I'll tell you as your browser, but I don't think you should. Eventually, the lack of expansion would probably lead to loss of gains, especially if a break from PE is taken. So if increased blood flow is vital... So never stop jelking. Ever. Never stop jerking.
Starting point is 00:19:12 I mean jelking. You're going to need to do it every day. I pretty much live by the motto, never stop jerking. Yeah. Like, if I had one Corey Hart song, it would be, never stop jerking! Is that a Corey Hart song? Yes, it one Corey Hart song, it would be, Never Stop Jerking!
Starting point is 00:19:26 Is that a Corey Hart song? Yes, it's Corey Hart. I guess it is now, yeah. So it's a good parody there, Weird Al. Oh, God. Sorry. That was one of those where I kind of realized it was unfunny as I was halfway through it.
Starting point is 00:19:42 Fuck! I'm already in the middle of this! Now it's got to stay in the episode. I don't know. Who's editing? Alright, let's keep going. Hi, I'm Dewey. Green thumb up. Yeah, I just tried this and you guys are right.
Starting point is 00:19:58 The result is great. As you said, RB, it's useful for executing a fast rise from the FPB to EPB, which can be helpful when measuring. Oh, yeah, I'll check out the thread you posted and would appreciate any other comments about this exercise. The spot is important in so many ways.
Starting point is 00:20:19 The root chakra is said to be centered there. Legend has it. So dicks have their own chakras? Yes. Yeah, yeah. You didn't know that? I didn't. All these years reading this hippie shit,
Starting point is 00:20:34 that didn't rub off? No, I just, I, well, none of the hippie shit ever rubs off because they don't really explain themselves very well. Oh, yeah, I guess that's true. It's all taken as, like, read's true. It's all taken as like red for everyone. It's like, yeah, we all know there's chakras and one lives in your penis.
Starting point is 00:20:51 It's the root chakra. It's because the Australian slang for sex is root. It's actually the fucking chakra. Yeah, alright. Well, this is another post by SSFergel. Wait, before we do that, did you read the last post in the last page that you were just on?
Starting point is 00:21:06 Take it. It's ICM answering a question as to why you should be careful there. Oh, that was me. Excessive pressure there can cause blood to appear in your semen, which will appear as brown streaks. Not pleasant, but quite harmless. Don't worry about it. You're just bleeding out your dick. Also, your
Starting point is 00:21:25 blood is brown. Jesus Christ. Look, if you do this, you might bleed out your dick, but you know. It's okay. It's only when you come. Don't worry about it. Yeah, you know, like, people that are kind of new to the idea,
Starting point is 00:21:41 like, they go, ooh, blood out of my dick. That's probably bad. I better stop. All right. So, Frank West, if you'll tell us how to get... How this whole jelking thing goes. Step one.
Starting point is 00:21:56 Get a 70% erecti-wection. Oh, it's baby-caping. Russell Brand. Erecti-wection. 70% erectilection. I went poo-poo in my diaper. Number two. You need a whim job for that.
Starting point is 00:22:11 Use your fingers to feel around between your ass and your ballsy-wallsies. Oh, my God. Ballsy-wallies. Number three. This is your inner penis. This is your inner penis. To joke this, you can push it against your body
Starting point is 00:22:28 with your fingertips, starting furthest back towards your ass, and sliding your fingers towards your nuts. Wait, so the taint is the inner penis? I guess so. Yeah, like I'm trying to You're just going to punch your taint. I'm just reaching down there.
Starting point is 00:22:44 You gotta punch your taint. Taint thump. I don't see... He's being as specific as he could be. It's between your ass and your ballsy-wallsy. I don't see why you guys can't find it. It simply pushes blood into the penis manually.
Starting point is 00:23:05 No magic. Since it does not get much attention, I suppose over time it can be a weak link because it gets less massaging effect so more plaque buildup can occur. That's my best guess anyway. So do you have to brush your blood veins? Your taint. Okay.
Starting point is 00:23:26 I did not expect that. That, guys, you laugh, but if you get a bad enough taint cavity, they have to do a taint canal. Open. Open. Wider. See your taint high-tenters for biannual cleaning.
Starting point is 00:23:45 So this thread is called The salty truth about jelking. Ew. Salty is the right term. Yep. Boots, you're going to start this off with goon baby. All right. I lackadaisically jelped in the beginning. Frankly, thought that newbie routines were for other people.
Starting point is 00:24:05 I like the concept of tension and use an ADS almost exclusively for the first 18 months of my PE career. Career? You're gonna go for that? All right. What's an ADS? Oh, shit.
Starting point is 00:24:20 That's a fun surprise. The all-day stretcher. What? That's what ADS is. that's a fun surprise the all day stretcher what that's what he did stands for all day stretcher you know I did that for a year and a half you know
Starting point is 00:24:37 before I started my career doing shows at the penis competitions pretty much the Arnold Schwarzenegger of jelking. I've since scrapped that prideful notion and I'm currently jelking like a so-and-so. I do at least 200 every morning. My goal is 300,
Starting point is 00:24:59 but sometimes I'm just not feeling it. And then I do sets of 50 throughout the day. So is this dude just sitting in his chair at the office just being like, One, two, three. Yeah, they gave me my own office. Like, that's all he's doing is just pushing his taint a hundred, three hundred times?
Starting point is 00:25:21 No, no, that's BTB gel kink. He's doing regular type gel kink. So that's just him like, He's just tugging his dick. Tugging his dick 300 times and stopping? This is a one, two, three, or two.
Starting point is 00:25:36 298, 299, 300. Good Jelk. Good Jelk. Let me tell myself down. Oh! Yeah. Oh, hey there, I didn't see you walk in.
Starting point is 00:25:49 I was just joking. Don't bother. Don't mind me. Just come on in. No, it's not jerking. It's spelled different, so it's different. In my opinion, 50 jokes is not nearly enough to do anything by itself. But if I wrung out the old sausage that morning like I should have,
Starting point is 00:26:06 the intermediate sets keep it plumpy all the live long day. Wrung out the old sausage. Ew. These guys are amazingly reluctant to say penis. That's some mixed metaphors there. I don't think we've... Oh, yeah, we've seen inner penis, but I don't think we've seen the word penis by itself.
Starting point is 00:26:25 Yeah. No, not once. Okay. I'll slap on the ADS from anywhere from four to six hours during the day, usually after letting the meat cool. Again, another expression that we all use. Never going to your barbecues. Letting the meat cool. But I am one who could never say that I have been very consistent.
Starting point is 00:26:53 In fact, the only consistent thing I did was ADS usage. And I kept a totally anal retentive log. Every year I retain that log. It surprises me that they spelled anal wrong. They couldn't actually say anal any more than they could say penis. Yeah, they're just grossed out by those terms. You can't say anal because that's gay. This is not gay.
Starting point is 00:27:19 If you use your penis's true name, it hears it and it actually shrinks back. No, it's more just like, I'm not calling this thing a penis. Are you kidding me? One day it'll work out to be a penis. This is an old sausage. This is a floppy sock. That's what this is.
Starting point is 00:27:36 This is an old sausage. It's all wrung out. Personally now. This is a bike tire pump. Something. All right, polish it up. I rarely missed a day, and it was a minimum of eight hours, five days a week for at least nine months. I gained everything during that time. After taking a decon break.
Starting point is 00:27:53 Like what? A decontamination break? Yeah. You got to get deloused. You just get off work from a Martian mine or something? No, he's working his way up to priests. First the deacons, then the priests. You just get off work from a Martian mine or something? No, he's working his way up to priests. First the deacons, then the priests.
Starting point is 00:28:15 Now it's all vicars. After taking a decon break, I could never regain my momentum. I've recently seen a very modest gain in erect girth of one sixteenth of an inch since I started jelking. Great penis tape measure, I guess. That's not much on a ruler, but I can sure tell it when I hold the thing in my hand.
Starting point is 00:28:38 My flaccid is dramatically larger, but not nearly big enough. Well, I know what the solution is then. For what? I'm jelking for girth because that is what I believe will be most noticeable to my wifey initially. Jelking is positively required just prior to sex, in my not-so-humble opinion.
Starting point is 00:29:00 Okay! Okay! Okay! You want to fix your sex life with your wifey? Couple things. If it's required to jerk your own cock for 20 minutes beforehand, maybe
Starting point is 00:29:14 figure out why that is a necessity. If you can cut that out, maybe things will improve otherwise. Yeah, unless she's making you say, yes, mistress. I was going to say, maybe I'm crazy. Maybe you could do this as a couple. She could jelk you.
Starting point is 00:29:32 I don't know. She does it wrong. Okay. I'm going to put my penis in a vagina. I'm going to put my penis in a vagina. I'm going to like it. I'm going to like it. God damn it, woman.
Starting point is 00:29:42 Don't you even know the inner penis from the outer penis? Didn't look at my PowerPoint. No, that's where my ballsy Wally is. I just don't understand. I've been jerking and tugging and putting weights on my penis all day, and I'm just not having good sex. Hey, Goon Baby, you were saying that Jelking has some pros and cons.
Starting point is 00:30:04 Yes, yeah. It has some pros and cons. Yes, yeah. It has some pros and cons. Okay. I don't necessarily like the discoloration. I am beginning to notice. Oh. No necessary way. What could possibly be the pro to offset that con?
Starting point is 00:30:18 Oh, well, the... No, that's a fun side effect. Yeah, the shaft feels a little tougher as well. I wonder if this might be the precursor to scar tissue. Those are my pros and cons. Oh, this episode was put together by Runic, by the way.
Starting point is 00:30:40 I believe this is the first submission from Runic that we've read, so thank you for that. Runic and a cursed monkey's paw. But Runic points out that ADS, the all-day stretcher, is an actual device. It's just a thing that you put on your dick that, like,
Starting point is 00:30:58 is like a Thighmaster, but for your dick, and it's automatic. Ow. What? Like, shape-wise or when you say Thighmaster, what do you mean? I don't know, to be honest. I could learn more, but you know,
Starting point is 00:31:14 sometimes you don't want to learn more about these guys. I've seen something like it. It's like there's those kids who get born with really short limbs and so they put these weird clamps on it, break the bone, and then adjust the clamps to stretch the limb out so the bone regrows.
Starting point is 00:31:27 Ooh! Like in Gannica. I'm thinking something like that, but maybe a little bit less cutting. So in this thread, Goon Baby and another forum regular called Nine in Richard, because Richard needs dick.
Starting point is 00:31:44 I don't know if you figured that out. So Goon Baby and Nine in Richard. Because Richard needs dick. I don't know if you figured that out. So Goon Baby and Nine in Richard, they have a fight about whether or not the method is working and they have to go up against people that are deriding their penis
Starting point is 00:32:00 largening principles. But finally, Nine and Richard puts everything to rest with this post right here. Frank West, please. Or I read further down that previous thread, Good Maybe has
Starting point is 00:32:17 further details. Yeah, he does. There's lots of stuff I'm skipping. Yes, you are. You can find that at the doc. Which will be on thefpl.us. I am nine and Richard. Yes, those gains are honest gains. If you are lying about such a trivial thing on the internet
Starting point is 00:32:37 to people whom you will never meet, then you have some serious issues. The only proof I could offer is that my wife... Is that you're on this forum. Is that my wife could testify in court if necessary. LOL.
Starting point is 00:32:56 It will be necessary. Please, someone take me to court. I need to brag to a whole bunch of jurors. Do you promise this is the dick, the whole dick, and nothing but the dick? Your Honor, my husband got me climbing the wall. He got a pipe out. Can you read that back? Can you read that back?
Starting point is 00:33:30 My girth was very noticeably increased in a short amount of time. I should also say that I supplement a lot. I'm sure you do. You probably also buy a bunch of dumb speaker shit. I take testosterone injections weekly, which I believe aids tremendously in tissue recovery. I gain gir growth quickly, but length not so much. So your dick's just getting fatter and fatter as you
Starting point is 00:33:51 stick steroids into it? His dick's basically Jonah Hill. Just to kind of expand out. I always had a, in my opinion, thinner than average penis at around 4.125 inches. Wow!
Starting point is 00:34:09 That is really specific. Yeah, it's like these guys are obsessed with their dicks or something. I know, you wouldn't think so, but... As I aged, as a smoker for 27 years, and gained weight, I lost probably an inch in length. What? Oh, fuck! What? From seven inches to six inches.
Starting point is 00:34:31 Don't smoke. It shrinks your dick. They should put that on cigarette packs. And I've been keeping logs. He gained an inch of fupa. Yeah. Don't think of it as losing an inch of dick. Think of it as gaining an inch of fupa. Don't think of it as losing an inch of dick. Think of it as gaining an inch of fupa.
Starting point is 00:34:50 Look on the positive side. I have since gained that inch back due to PE, but haven't budged in length past my initial mark of 7 inch in the past three months. I believe that my girth has gotten bigger since starting back into PE three months ago.
Starting point is 00:35:06 I would guess that I have gained another one eighth inch girth in the past three months using the Using the? Using the andropenis only. Wow! I can't.
Starting point is 00:35:20 I thought about getting that, but I don't want to commit to paying for the app unless I know what it does. No, no, no, there's a free version. You can try it out. You get a bunch of ads on your dick, but, you know, just ignore them. Meet single girls in your dick. Wow, this is convenient! Oh, God, there's YouTube videos for that Oh fuck
Starting point is 00:35:49 Why would you click those? I didn't click on them Alright, keep going I have not, however, gained any more length I seem to gain girth very easily Okay, okay Part of my new routine is not to measure until the end of each phase of training.
Starting point is 00:36:06 I believe that the anxiety involved in constantly measuring puts a serious damper on my ability to gain. A watched cock never plumps. I hope that those who have corresponded with me during my time here can feel confident that my results and methods are an honest interpretation. However, if they are simply too much for certain members to swallow, then there just isn't anything one can say in that regard.
Starting point is 00:36:31 My wife loves the girth gains, I love the girth gains, and that's all that matters to me. So sayeth Nine and Richard. Be winking Bob Dobbs. So sayeth Nine and Richard, so sayeth we all. Thanks, Bob Dobbs. Thanksinking Bob Dobbs. So saith nine and Richard, so saith we all. Thanks, Bob Dobbs. Thanks, Bob Dobbs.
Starting point is 00:36:49 Yeah. Oh, God. I don't know if I want to read that. Alright, so we're not going to be spending all our time here on Thunder's Place. Also Thunder's Place. Thunder's Place, also Thunder's Place, because we are also going to go to
Starting point is 00:37:09 sosuave.net. Sosuave.net is a shittily designed PUA forum. That's such a contrast to all the other PUA forums. So this is from sosuave.net in the Don Juan discussion forum uh Kerpal asks anyone try jelking? what were your experiences?
Starting point is 00:37:36 um and uh mictwist4 rather uh Adam if you'll take that please I used to do it a lot I was already McTwist 4, rather. Adam, if you'll take that, please. I used to do it a lot. I was already bigger than average. But that wasn't enough for me.
Starting point is 00:37:56 Well, after so long, my erections weren't the same anymore. My fuck was thinner. Not as hard. And a little bit shorter. For the listener that may not be familiar with this, we have a podcast rule where any time four asterisks
Starting point is 00:38:15 are put together, that always means fuck. It can be really damaging to your fuck. To my disappointment, it was not just temporary. It can be really damaging to your fuck. Oh, no. To my disappointment, it was not just temporary. Okay. I've been taking expensive supplements from www.actionlove.com. Action love! Action love!
Starting point is 00:38:44 And I'd say my fuck is 70% back to normal. They do work if anyone else in my shoes wants to try them. I'm expecting by the end of September, it'll be mostly back to normal. Don't joke. It's not worth it. There is, however, a ballooning method on www.actionlove.com that will make it bigger without damaging
Starting point is 00:39:08 it. And actionlove.com is what would happen if Alex Chu and Time Cube had a love child. Can I be? No, you can't. Damn it! Alright, fine.
Starting point is 00:39:24 I'm Krizzy's. Yo, I'm Krizzy's. Hey, Krizzy's. I do joking all the time. Every time I go to the beach, I walk past hotties, I can hear them whisper, Did you see that guy in Speedos? His man meat looks huge. He fine.
Starting point is 00:39:40 Do you think his dick got that big from joking? The truest story ever! Jelking actually got a woman to approach me. Every time I walk to the beach now, hot babes are giving me kisses and screaming, Oh my God, it's the Jelking! God, I love the beach. Dang! God, I love the beach.
Starting point is 00:40:11 There's a bunch of more posts in here, but I would just like to, rather than read some of the posts, I just want to highlight two different signatures in this thread. I-A-F-Y-B, his signature says, No band-aid like Nelly, but I bang like R. Kelly. You bang in only incredibly gross ways. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And in Protein Powder, his signature sort of nips a problem right in the bud.
Starting point is 00:40:42 He says, I know my spelling and grammar sucks. Don't correct it. That's annoying. Not my fault, asshole. Yours. There's also this other username. I'm not even going to try to pronounce it. It's gibberish. But I think his closing sentence on that post, I think, would sum up a lot of people here.
Starting point is 00:41:00 Lolz, I don't care about the size of my pen 15. All the girls I fuck are either so drunk they won't notice or they're passed out. I'd like to point out that his username is not gibberish. It's before I F you, are you 18? Ding, ding, ding, ding. Tell him what he's won. On that note, we need to leave this place.
Starting point is 00:41:24 Go back to Thunder's place. Thank God. Is there like a double incognito mode? I can't make sure the Library of Congress never finds out about this. Is there a way I can do this without the individual incognito session even knowing about it?
Starting point is 00:41:43 All right. So this is Thunder's Place. Again, out of the poo, just into the pure penis enlargement. My name is Jack1015. I'm a senior member. I'm located somewhere in the
Starting point is 00:41:57 European Union. Using silver foil to keep penis warm. Has anyone used silver foil or a heat-reflecting material on the penis shaft or head to keep it warm while stretching? I think I will look into this as it could keep the penis warmer, which would reduce the breaks needed between sex. Wait, so you have to stop jerking your cock because your penis is too cold?
Starting point is 00:42:26 Well, his penis is cold and discolored and spurting out blood, so you need to wait a couple minutes at least. But if you could keep it warm, you could just keep going. Should I put a silk handkerchief over my penis and wave my fingers around it and then wish really hard
Starting point is 00:42:42 and then wait a night and then look and see if it's bigger in the morning? I think the real point is that you put the tinfoil around your dick so that the CIA can't read your dick's thoughts.
Starting point is 00:42:52 Must fuck more pussy. Oh, now that you've said that, I'm going to read the comment from Ayamaru. No, but it will stop the CIA or aliens from remotely controlling your penis. Oh, beat me to the joke.
Starting point is 00:43:03 You need that QI klaxon. Ouch, you got beat to the joke by a dude on a penis enlargement forum. Ooh, that does feel wrong. A dude with 12,000 posts on a penis enlargement forum. Uh, Boots, you're Tom Hubbard. You're an ex-member. I don't know what caused a rift to make you leave this site, but, you know, I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:43:21 Maybe one day you'll come back. But you put a poll out in the field. Yeah, I got sorry. Maybe one day he'll come back. But you put a poll out in the field. Yeah, I got a poll here. It's, yeah, straight guys, any real-life guys know you're P.E.? So I've asked the following question. So you're heterosexual. Does any other male in real life know you do P.E.? The options are no and yes.
Starting point is 00:43:46 I like that, I think a definition of a push poll is a poll that tells you what sexual orientation you are when it starts. This is more of a poll. Oh, sir, I'm from Gallup. You're straight! Right. This is more of a poll poll. Nice. Alright, I'll take it. I specify straight guys only because I suspect gay and bi are more open to discussing such things in real life.
Starting point is 00:44:11 Are they? I don't know. I'm not going to bother to poll about it. The results are that 75% said no and 25% said yes. Wish more people would keep it to themselves. That's 30 people who won't shut up about it in the sauna And won't
Starting point is 00:44:28 Stop doing it in the sauna Five inch dick, huh? You know what I do J-E-L-Q That's how you spell it It's a good thing they specify Do other males know you Because obviously all of the females at the beach
Starting point is 00:44:44 Know immediately They can see females at the beach know immediately. They can see. I love the beach. I love the beach. What's his secret? Maybe he's born with it. Maybe it's joking. Okay.
Starting point is 00:45:00 Beautiful. What a fucking layup that was. Alright. When he's patiently growing. Beautiful. What a fucking layup that was. All right. And it's patiently growing. Entire family knows. Started with... No. No.
Starting point is 00:45:14 No, wait, no. This story's going to get worse. Here we go. Started with only telling my father. Then I told my cousin, second closest relative to me. Then I told my brothers. Mother found out. Ooh, boy!
Starting point is 00:45:29 Ooh! When you phrase the word mother like that, you are creepy. Mother. Mother. You know he says it with like three syllables. Okay, I need to redo that anyway. He sighs somewhere.
Starting point is 00:45:45 Told my brothers, Mother found out when the pump came in the mail. Couldn't hide it like bad grades. It's a bong, yeah. Brought me closer to all of them because I shared
Starting point is 00:46:04 an insecurity. Didn't have the insecurity anymore thanks to this place. And being honest with my family. After that, I focus more on what my friends say. If I pick up a hint that they are insecure about their body or sex skills, I tend to tell them about this place. It's called Thunder's Place. I refuse to let know about TP,
Starting point is 00:46:33 which I believe is Thunder's Place in this case. I've told a total of three friends about this place. I'm just bragging about the number of friends I have now. Three friends! Wow! One is insecure about not being cut. It led him to avoid sex with women. That's what led it to him. And it always put himself in...
Starting point is 00:46:55 Oh, I'm going to hate reading this sentence. And it always put himself in the friend zone. Oh, man. Because of his uncut penis. The third got married, and I told him about this place for more than just one reason.
Starting point is 00:47:18 I'm showing that voice very much by the end. ACR, your devotion nine. Well, I do feel devoted. i need to find where i am oh i was staying at my pops and he found my pump he told me that won't work it's a fantasy i laughed so hard i told him i'm am 1000 sure grew an itch from age 30 to 33. Look at how much bigger the holes in my stuffed animals are. Wow. Way to go, son.
Starting point is 00:47:56 He was flabbergasted. Poor boomer generation. They were really screwed up. Yeah, man. Oh, boy. Go to bed, old man. And I have a quote. Such Spartan training is for the champ.
Starting point is 00:48:11 Bruce Lee! That's a tacit endorsement. Like a flaccid endorsement. Oh. Yeah. Okay, so it's C-Z ZE-P-A. Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z-Z I told my friends when I first started lurking at TP and joking at 17
Starting point is 00:48:47 that I had bigger than average dick. Because being a... I joked at 17. Because being a skinny guy and not confident the common shit stirring is you've got a small dick.
Starting point is 00:49:06 Then I tried to tell a mate about P.E., and basically I got laughed at. And it wasn't good to be thought of as the guy who talks about dicks. So it wasn't a good experience for me, and I'd be very hesitant about telling anyone in the future. I can't
Starting point is 00:49:22 imagine why anyone would target this guy and make fun of the fact he has a small dick. You know, like... Did you guys know I have a big dick? Yeah, like if you saw, like, an asshole in a Corvette, and they were like, Hey, you got a small dick. And that guy went like,
Starting point is 00:49:34 No, I actually have a really huge dick. It doesn't actually matter. That's not really what we're focused on. Oh, shit. Sorry. My bad. I didn't realize. I doffed my hat to you, sir.
Starting point is 00:49:47 I just assumed because of the car and everything. Frank West, on the last page here, you are Frank79 and you imagine yourself as a cat with a giant dick. What? Also, there's so many
Starting point is 00:50:10 signatures that have just a bunch of fucking jargon in them, so I assume that's like... I think it's like their dick timeline? Yeah, I think it's their dick measuring log. Captain's log! It's basically the digital version of them putting their
Starting point is 00:50:26 dick against the door jamb and penciling. Third grade. 37. Four inches. My GF saw my ADS in the past and asked me why I was wearing that
Starting point is 00:50:45 I told here because I want a big dick and she asked me to stop it right now You are the biggest I saw and I love your cock That's not a quote That's not a quote Frank West is telling you guys, the listener I'm not even reading
Starting point is 00:51:02 This is straight from the heart right here. I stop it, but I keep in mind that this shit must work. It'd work for other parts of the body. What? No, if you put clamps on your arms, your arms don't get bigger. They don't?
Starting point is 00:51:19 Just ask the Spanish Inquisition. That shit works. I finally found TP this year and work with Newbie Routine this summer. You can see my stats. That shit works. Oh. I finally found TP this year and work with newbie routine this summer. You can see my stats. This shit work. Smiley. At the end of summer, I have buy an air pump and she found it. Not Smiley.
Starting point is 00:51:40 Bitch, you took my Smiley away. Oh no. This time, she just asked me how much I paid for it. Told here $40, not $90. Wink. She did not argue more, so I didn't tell here about TP and everything. But she told me that she had bigger orgasms and don't know why. Hello, baby. LOL.
Starting point is 00:52:01 I spend all my time on a dick forum and lie to my wife all the time. Our relationship is great. Yay! I'm now hanging with a bib starter. I also have a bath mate. Clamp and measuring tape in a box. This time if she found the box, I will told here everything and my gains.
Starting point is 00:52:20 Smiley. I found your dick, Kit. My dick tape and my dick clamp and my dick towel? So this thread is also similar. This is telling the wife about P.E.
Starting point is 00:52:35 Oh boy. My name's Dura Ace. We need to talk. Yes, I know you're a creep. I know. I'm a dirty, dirty creep with a Tick towel How could I not know that? You might notice I have a clamp on my dick right now
Starting point is 00:52:51 Okay, so I'm Dura Ace Well, guys and gals Gals? Yep, guys and gals Of the dick-makin'-bigger forum I'm just into talking about joking I just like joking Yep, guys and gals of the dick-making-bigger forum. I'm just into talking about joking. I just like joking.
Starting point is 00:53:13 I'm just picturing a woman who's secretly using these various methods to surreptitiously enlarge her partner's penis. Oh. All right. The wife came in while I was surfing Thunder's Place. What's Thunder's Place, she asked. Well, this time I told her the truth instead of making up some lame excuse. She knew something was up. I told her about the exercise.
Starting point is 00:53:33 Oh, dear. Oh, my God. I told her about the exercises, the power joke thing I bought about the forum and hanging, which, by the way, I don't know if we've made that clear, so let me just make that clear right now. Hanging means taking weights and just dangling them off your penis. Right. Yeah, okay, so now we know that that happens.
Starting point is 00:53:54 And the reason I am doing P.E. in the first place. Know what? She is okay with it. Whoa. Yeah, hurt yourself. Go ahead. I thought she would be. Then she said it. Honey, I'm happy with the way you are now. Yeah, right yourself. Go ahead. I thought she would be. Then she said it. Honey, I'm happy with the way you are now. Yeah, right.
Starting point is 00:54:10 Heard that one before. Yeah, right. I get it. You're happy. Whatever. Haven't I proven I don't care about your happiness? What about me? What about me and all the times I have to show my penis to people? Just don't go to the beaches often. Can you imagine, though, like, that woman just going, like, what's Thunder's Place?
Starting point is 00:54:32 And then he in the middle of, well, I have a contraption that stretches my penis. Her just going, I didn't need to know. I really shouldn't have asked. And I'll never ask again. I was literally just making conversation. Thunder's Place, huh? Yeah. So what I do is, no, that's, mmm. Okay.
Starting point is 00:54:48 Of course. Well, I thought so. Like, he's been looking for a way to slip this casually into conversation for like months. You know how I'm on the internet, right? I told her women say size doesn't matter until they get into their little sewing circles.
Starting point is 00:55:03 By the way, I'm posted from the 1930s. What? So the women get in their sewing circles. Well, my husband's got an 8-inch dick. Well, mine's got 9 inches. What are they going to do? Whip the husbands out? Well, ladies, my husband's been hanging
Starting point is 00:55:19 weights from his dick. Ooh. But has he been joking? Anyway, until they get in their little sewing circles, then size is king. She put up a weak argument, but did not go as far as admitting that I am right. Did not go as far as that.
Starting point is 00:55:34 She did not go as far as that. Hope I didn't blow it there. Maybe she is telling it straight. I am looking forward. I pointed at my monitor when I did that. I am looking forward to not having to sneak my sessions. Maybe with her on the team, my gains will come quicker. Keep y'all posted.
Starting point is 00:55:51 She'll love doing all this shit. Looking forward to dick exercises in front of my wife. Honey, no. Just put the weight. Put the weight. No. Oh, the inner dick. You're doing it wrong.
Starting point is 00:56:01 Do you even have a dick? Just watch. Can you just watch? Okay, so who in this recording hates women the most? It's Adam Bozarth, clearly. It's not. It's why I didn't say anything. Oh, we can tell.
Starting point is 00:56:20 We know what you did. Adam, you are post number 12 by Luv Luvdudus. Luvdudus. Luvdadus. Luvdadus.
Starting point is 00:56:34 Luvdadus. Luvdadus. I'm Luvdadus. Hope I don't piss any of the women on this forum off with this one. I don't think you will. Again. Convoluted.
Starting point is 00:56:49 Here goes. It seems that there is a certain part of the female psyche that needs to control the man she is with in certain areas. Took you like two sentences to lead into this post. I realized I needed to do a voice. Sex is definitely one of those areas. Let's face it, women are the gatekeepers of sex in most relationships. Oh, boy.
Starting point is 00:57:18 Oh, boy. Here we go. Your getting a bigger unit represents a loss of some control to her. She feels threatened. What? Okay, yeah. Zach jealous? Jealousy big dick?
Starting point is 00:57:32 He's probably got a really good theory here. We should hear him out. If it gets big enough, she is helpless. I have been doing P.E. for about three months. Oh, this is a quote from somebody else. Oh. Frank West, do you want to... I have been doing PE for about
Starting point is 00:57:49 three months. Boy, I got shot! My main man loves daddos. And she's still bitch about it. Tell in And she's still bitch about I can't do it
Starting point is 00:58:08 Tell in me that I'm sick Locking myself in the office Of the house for hours Playing with my weapon And spending too much time with it My Joffrey weapon Get through that sentence Jesus Christ
Starting point is 00:58:22 Not knowing the particulars, are you spending too much time on it? Yes. Yes, obviously. But when we have sex, she loves it. I think she is more concerned about me doing P.E. because she thinks I'm having an affair or looking to have one
Starting point is 00:58:40 and want to look bigger for somebody eels. That was one of her points on to the week's discussion. She's gonna have sex with the eels. Wow. That just fell apart. Isn't it strange that
Starting point is 00:58:57 now that you can ring her bell better than ever before she gets possessive and paranoid. Women have a strange double standard in this area. Once they see you as a stud,
Starting point is 00:59:15 they are constantly looking for evidence that someone else is benefiting. My wife has a strange double standard that involves the way we dress. Oh, boy. It seems that if I expose a little too much chest
Starting point is 00:59:33 or my dickhead shows through my pants, she feels that I should readjust without question. Have I been dressing slutty wrong all this time? I imagine that he's just wearing V-neck t-shirts that just go down to his ball sack. It's just a banana hammock. Wearing a V-neck t-shirt and a v-neck pants. Yeah, it's just an X outfit.
Starting point is 01:00:12 However, if I mention my discomfort that her blouse is unbuttoned too far, I am made to feel like I am less than the all-confident male I should be. I am actually a little flattered
Starting point is 01:00:28 that she's a bit jealous, but the double standard slash control issue does piss me off sometimes. You have a terrific relationship. Yes. Now we don't have to do a Dave Sim episode, so that's great.
Starting point is 01:00:43 This man has a signature that says, My weapon and I are in for a long battle. Oh, can I read 10x7's dick-stretching schedule? Oh, shit. Yes. Okay, yeah. Love, dead us, I have a tough schedule. This is what I do from Monday to Friday.
Starting point is 01:01:02 Get up in the morning at 5 a.m., give her a good morning kiss. Go spend one and a half hour hanging. After finishing everything with the hanging, about 6.30 to 6.45, after that I spend 45 minuets with her and the kids, getting them ready to go to school and her to go to work. 7.30, go to work, come back 6 p.m., spend about two hours with her and the kids, and at 8.30 I go to my office for one hour for my pumping session Tuesday. Saturday, Sunday, I don't pump.
Starting point is 01:01:26 Saturday and Sunday, I just spend my time with the family. I don't know, you guys judge for yourself. I spend too much time on PE. I believe that she's tremendously jealous and insecure with me. She's always been that way. Breaker, I really didn't care at that time when she said she now lost the battle.
Starting point is 01:01:41 So she was trying to gain some ground by telling me that I had one month. Yes, it goes on like that, but anyway. Do you keep notebooks with all the shit? Yes. All right. When you're spending like three or four hours a day on it, I mean, keeping a notebook is the least effort you could put in. I keep a secret Android device specifically for scheduling my... Isn't that the fun of it?
Starting point is 01:02:06 If it's something you could reliably program into your phone calendar on a regular basis, you might as well start keeping it. See, I just put my dick in my smart cup. To learn more about the smart cup, go to Ballpit. That's B-A-L-L-P dot I-T. That's right. That's right. There's a whole thread about the smart cup.
Starting point is 01:02:26 ACR. B-A-L-L-P dot I-T. That's right. That's right. There's a whole thread about the smart cup. Acier. This is from the same thread about the telling the wife. You are Led Zepp. Pretty single guys. Amo, if you're single and tell a girl about your P.E., she will probably think you're unique until you piss her off.
Starting point is 01:02:42 Or break up with her. Then you're probably going into weirdo category. But... Okay. Yeah. Alright. But in the back of her mind, she should respect your efforts. But, so what? What's she going to do? Tell your mom?
Starting point is 01:02:59 She might just go upstairs and tell your mom, yeah. I never thought about yeah. I seriously doubt that any girls are going to think negatively about the guy wanting to make his dick bigger. You should double think that. You're going to have to ask one of them. I refuse. Times are changing, and P.E. isn't a keep-it-in-the-closet deal anymore. You're mistaken in the way that times are changing and P.E. isn't a keep it in the closet deal anymore. You're mistaken in the way that times are changing.
Starting point is 01:03:28 No. It is what you think it is. Zep. Times are changing and my username is Ledzep. He's been doing this for 13 years on this forum wow what's uh what did we learn from all of this from this experience we had i... Oh my god! But, you know, like, alright, I thought, I've seen the Kinsey stuff, like, okay, I'm in the bell curve, whatever.
Starting point is 01:04:11 I'm satisfied now, you know? Hey, it's fine. I don't have to... Maybe I don't need to stretch it. Maybe I can live with myself. Maybe everything is just okay. Maybe I don't have to post on this fucking Thunder's Place. Wow! I like that these guys are actually, like, they're, you know,
Starting point is 01:04:28 they're putting effort into this. They're not just like, you know, buying, you know, snake oil products for this. They're buying, they're like, yes, this thing's going to stretch my dick out nice and good. They're getting real active in their
Starting point is 01:04:43 endeavors. All they're really doing, like, they all keep citing jelking as this thing, and all they're really real active in their endeavors they all keep citing joking as this thing and all they're really doing is just spending quality time with their penises and it's just that's probably all it needs maybe you just need to feel better about it and then your wife will notice but it's not necessarily
Starting point is 01:05:00 quality time because it's kind of like misappropriated into this like tug fest like this all day tug fest but that's how men express quality time is by tugging and being rough and physical with things and there's so much stuff we skipped over too
Starting point is 01:05:18 like things I was digging up on this side about guys like permanently damaging the goods with too much vigor applied, shall we say. Yeah. And, you know,
Starting point is 01:05:28 I mean, yeah. So it's like, I mean, cause the, cause the obvious one, like the obvious one is, is the thing that you,
Starting point is 01:05:35 you know, the, the Swedish, the Swedish penis pump, you know, the, the, the,
Starting point is 01:05:39 the thing that's like vacuum suctiony thing. And it's like, you know, like, like we all know what that is. It's just like a crappy blowjob. So you're just buying a crappy blowjob, but you're pretending like it's for some sort of medical use.
Starting point is 01:05:53 But, I mean, these guys are definitely not doing that. Like, this is totally, totally, totally not people that just, like, have an elaborate cover story for masturbating. Like, they're in, like, a whole world of, like, fucking crazy, like, Jim Rose cock hate. Yeah, and it doesn't seem, like, nobody's really kind of expressing why they want to have it done other than, like, I can do it. Then, like, you know, like, the one guy who was who was like was talking about how he was already big like he listed him as like he was like at seven inches like this is just a thing now where he's just like i gotta go bigger and it's not about anybody but me proving myself well it's i mean
Starting point is 01:06:37 it's like it's like so many other like topics in in body dysmorphia. I mean, if you compare like, uh, like, jelking with anorexia, I mean, there are parallels where, like, you know, you've got the people that think that they can't be too skinny. Um, you've got the guys that think,
Starting point is 01:06:55 ah, it's not swollen enough. Let me jam a needle in there. Like, and it is that same kind of body dysmorphia issue of, like, because, you know, and, I mean, you know, this is the F+, so it's not like we were exactly fair in our portrayals. But I'm positive that you're not going to go through there and have a whole bunch of situations where people are like, oh, yeah, I'm like two and a half inches, and I've had this girlfriend for a while, and she's like, God, I'm sorry, I like you and stuff,
Starting point is 01:07:27 it's just, this isn't working for me. I bet that's not happening very often at all. I bet they're solving a problem that's not real, and creating a problem that's way real. Well, they never actually seem to solve the problem. People who work out, they often have a specific goal in mind or, like, people who exercise, people who do anything. But, like, these guys, no one is
Starting point is 01:07:50 satisfied. There's not a single person on this forum who's like, I grew and I got what I wanted. Yeah, it's always, I'm getting some results from this one. Now I'm trying these other things. Even the dudes who claim that they grew a bunch are still going at it. There's members on there
Starting point is 01:08:06 who've had accounts for over a decade. At ten years of pulling on your dick, you figure maybe something's gonna happen. It's gonna fall off. I mean, I've been pulling on my dick for over ten years. It hasn't gotten me anything. Well, it's probably gotten you somewhere, but you're satisfied with that.
Starting point is 01:08:21 I mean, yeah, because when Runic originally sent me the doc, I was like, oh, okay, penis enlargement. That's fun. It's going to be more snake oil bullshit. People are going to do this thing, and that'll be funny. Take pebbles to their dicks. Yeah, like, let's make fun of suckers. That's always fun.
Starting point is 01:08:43 But this isn't that. And I mean, to their credit, I suppose, I mean, they are doing something that's giving them some sort of result. I'm sure. I'm sure that if you commit hours of your day to torturing your own genitals, like, you will change the shape of your genitals. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, like, if you keep putting, like, pieces of plastic in your ear,
Starting point is 01:09:07 you will definitely get big, saggy, loopy ears. Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep. So, yeah, pretty much the same principle. And if you're looking for people with the hugest dicks in the world, you should go to ball pits. Oh, no. Ball pits. Why are ball pits not big enough?
Starting point is 01:09:29 It's BLP.IT There's a thread about Google Glass. There was a thread somebody started where we're asking Montreux just questions about what it means to be Finnish. Like, are there
Starting point is 01:09:43 trolls where you live? How many times in your day do you see the words angry birds on something? Apparently a lot. Yeah, also somebody just posted the Gangstarker field operatives manual. Oh, shit! I need to get out of that.
Starting point is 01:09:59 And that's all we got, so keep listening and more QE soon. Bye-bye. There's a monster in my pants and it does a modern dance. When it comes into a room, people hit it with a broom. Take that monster!
Starting point is 01:10:14 Take that monster! Take it! Take it! Take that, you awful thing! Take that! Oh! Take that! Oh! Take it! Take it! Take that, you bloody fake! And they don't wear pants on the other side of France, but they do wear fleece to protect them from the beast. Monster! Monster!
Starting point is 01:10:38 O.J.F. Raynick Monster! What's my result? What's the result? Wait, you've got steps. Oh, you've come for the runaway winner. No, before you go to the answer, you have to read the details of the poll. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. Well, everybody ask, how important Big Dick?
Starting point is 01:10:57 Experiment, please, everybody. Number one, insert pencil into anus. Number two, insert finger into anus. Wait, should I take the pencil out first? No. No, that would have been anus. Number two. Okay. Insert finger into anus. Wait, should I take the pencil out first? No. No, that would have been an instruction. I would have at least said 1B. All right.
Starting point is 01:11:13 Insert finger into anus. Number three. Insert small carot into anus. All right. Okay. Number four. Insert big carrot into anus. Oh, no.
Starting point is 01:11:27 Number five. Insert cucumber into anus. Now vote, please. I've just... None of this feels good. By the time we got to the big carrot, I've just poked a pencil through my intestines. Oh.

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