The F Plus - 215: Oculus Cruft
Episode Date: June 10, 2016It's a confluence of technologies and interests that brought us to this point, but we're here. With a number of viable VR options released to the market, we find ourselves taking our first clumsy... steps towards fully realized, three dimensional, immersive, interconnected, user created worlds. And the subjects of this episode have gathered together and announced clearly and in one voice: "I want to jizz all over that!" This week, The F Plus witnesses the birth of a brand new fetish.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
All right, all right, all right.
Here we go.
Here we go.
Back to the part where we record.
No, I'm not done watching.
Okay.
Okay.
I'm on.
I'm on. This is the F Plus Podcast, a virtually sexy place for virtually terrible things read with virtual enthusiasm. In the room tonight we have
Boots Reingear. You can shoot
fluid by pressing the Z
key or X button. Note,
this can be resource heavy on your system.
John Toast. Good morning.
Ah, the redhead again.
Kumquats up. So far I've
fucked Gianna Michaels, Cammy from
Street Fighter, and that girl with the big tits at the
taco place I go to.
Oh god.
Your friend on the internet, this is
Adam Bozerth!
But doinks, Miriam Prado has amazing
eye contact, but only in
certain scenes. And
Lemon, fuck you, fuck me for Windows
95, Windows 98, and
Windows NT provides the most complete
remote sex solution for the
internet and corporate intranet.
Y2K compliance.
Hey, Fplus.
Hey, Lemon. Hello. Hey, Lemon.
Have y'all been fucking your computers lately?
No.
I've had a dry spell.
You sound a little coy there, Adam.
No.
All right.
Well, I want to introduce you, all of you.
John Tost, Booster Rank, here come Quatsop, Adam Bozart.
I want to introduce all of you to the future.
And the future
is things that you plug into
your computer and then you stick your dick into.
This has been the future for a very long time, hasn't it?
I know, and it's still
the future.
Whoa, I'm floating atop a
grid. There's a
sphere that turns into a cone. Yeah, it's like
Lawnmower Man, except you have a giant boner. So it's like Lawnmower Man, except you have a giant boner.
So it's like Lawnmower Man.
So, yes,
this document was provided to us
fairly recently
by the Heavenator and Lesbiathon.
Both of them are great names.
Lesbiathon?
Lesbiathon.
Lesbiathon.
Well, I mean, those are two different names. No, it's Lesbiathon. Lesbi it's probably Lesbiathan. Well, I mean, those are two different meanings.
No, it's Lesbia-than.
Lesbiathan.
Like Leviathan.
Anyway,
so this
is a document all about
the future of
sex.
And, you know, let's all be
grown-ups about this. Let's all be adults about the
content that we're going to read, okay?
Can we promise that? Can we promise that we'll all be
responsible? Okay, terrific.
So to that end, we're going to be going to
VRTitties.com.
Yay!
Tee hee hee!
Tee hee hee!
That is VRTitties.com
and the subtitle is
VR Porn, Oculus Rift, and
Vive Porn
so the first
topic is give yourself a blowjob
alright
I'll see y'all in a sec
be right back
it's ok I've seen him do this it doesn't take long
so give yourself
a blowjob.
This is about a product called the Onyx and Pearl Couple.
It is a fleshlight and a vibrator that are both IoT, like Wi-Fi connections,
so that you're fucking each other at the same time, which is great.
Anyway, so the product itself gets reviewed, and then
Tease Tease
says...
Sorry, that name is Test Tease.
Oh, Test Tease.
Oh, I get it.
Test Tease says, I'm sad to say,
but this thing, it just isn't worth it
for the money. $60 value
might even be a stretch.
I'll get into details at a later point. Time for
sleep. And then Adam, you are
Thanks. Adam, you are Todd South.
He's gonna get over the refractory period.
He's exhausted for some reason.
I'm Todd South.
I beg to differ. I had
my Kiru
Onyx for a couple of weeks
now and it's certainly well designed.
Good aesthetic and
premium build quality so
instantly looks worth
over $60.
Good aesthetic means a
like a Wi-Fi router that you stick your
dick into.
Yeah.
The automatic settings
are alright. Fast is great for
finishing off. Slow gives a nice The automatic settings are alright Fast is great for Finishing off
Slow gives a nice workout
You'd need to get into the rhythm of the device
To get to a climax
And I find the cycle to be
Too changeable at the wrong time
Sir you're making too many
Assumptions about my penis
How many assumptions
Do you prefer people to make about your penis
So what are these like settings on an elliptical It's like oh about my penis. How many assumptions do you prefer people to make about your penis?
So what are these, like, settings on an elliptical?
It's like, oh, I'm gonna do the hill, but let me do the varied one.
I don't like the resistance that
this robo-pussy
gives me. The overall
feel is somewhat of a
mix between sex,
blowjob, and masturbation.
How many of those things are you familiar with,
Hot South?
Um, two.
So it's stimulating your penis,
stimulating your penis, and stimulating
your penis.
It's varied.
The lube plus building warmth
give the first two sensations.
The action is a
blend of all three.
What I found so far is that
it's a great feeling,
but on its own, not enough
to climax. Really? Wait a minute.
You're getting a handjob,
a blowjob, and sex simultaneously
and that's not enough to climax?
Not enough for me.
Todd South.
It gives you what they call in the biz,
confused dick.
That's how you make it stronger,
is by penis confusion.
Training.
But then to mix between that and masturbation
and get the Kiryu to finish
is a great mix.
But then there is
the V-Stroker content. Oh, that sounds pat is the V-Stroker content.
Oh, that sounds
patented. V-Stroker.
Is this like the Commodore 64 game, Stroker?
Somebody's
gonna get that. This for me
is where the value ramps up.
They basically use a
JavaScripted movie player to show
a video. What? They have a
subtitle track that gives the feedback to the Onyx.
I'm explaining, dummy.
I could have sex with JavaScript?
Oh, God.
Usually JavaScript fucks me.
Every time you dismiss a alert, good things happen.
Right.
Speaking of...
Hey, presto.
A device sometimes perfectly in sync with the porn.
The immersion works for me.
Using the device with regular porn seems a little hit and miss as to how it makes me feel.
Using it with a synced-up porn gets me hard.
It keeps me hard.
It keeps me focused on the scene.
Hey, hey, eyes up here, asshole.
I'm bored.
Millennials
can't pay attention to a porno film
unless they're dicks in a robo-pussy.
Oh, masturbating and texting.
Classic. Content isn't perfect.
Cuts in the scene.
Break the immersion. But seeing
virtual real porn getting a link on their media
center site points to great things on the immersion front vr synced with the kiru this is cutting edge
stuff and so well worth the premium in my opinion that entire paragraph meant nothing
can you tell i might work for this company i I mean, I know you said you didn't
like fucking that thing, but...
Nope, it means you spelled center with an
R-E, so you're British, so that makes sense.
Union
jackoff.
I just wanted to say that you said
virtual real porn, and
I am on Kiru, presented
by Fleshlight, by the way. And virtual real porn is and I am on Kiru, presented by Fleshlight, by the way.
And virtual real porn
is a pair of devices. The first
is a
thing that you stick your dick into,
and the second is VR
goggles that you wear. And also,
while you're on the Kiru site,
if you just sit there for a little while, then
a robot chat thing comes up,
and it says, Rebecca, hello, how can I help you?
How do I get this, Rebecca?
Send one to me.
And, oh, let's finish this up with Beefalo.
Boots, if you'll take Beefalo, please.
I'm Beefalo.
Hey there.
I finally had the chance
to try out at least the Onyx
and I regret to say I agree
with testees.
I tried the fast
pump.
Why are you laughing?
I was just trying the fast pump.
You tried the fast pump.
Always rushing into things.
Like, slow down.
It's a robot, but it still needs to be romanced.
Jeez.
While it's an interesting sensation,
I'm not going to come unless I assist it.
The slow pump is pointless.
Help me help you come.
Manual mode is quick,
so it feels like a clamp on a car.
Wait, what?
Manual mode?
Manual mode.
Yeah, it's nice.
It has a good override system.
Manual mode.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Again, it's like self-driving cars.
You know, you need that kill switch.
It's become self-aware.
Shut it down. It'll fuck everything.
No, no, it's
handjob mode.
Not much.
Start manual mode. Remove the device and
place your hand on it. Not much slide
slash friction sensation.
There's an
aural feel to it, but the zing
of the gears quickly
breaks my mood with it
holy cow
it's loud
I gathered that from the love sin
video of the random people
hooking up but yeah
that could use some improvement
sounds like an airsoft gun
oh my god
and I'm back in.
Hang on, I gotta pump up my
cup.
Let me hit the stop sign. It makes a nice
satisfying ping.
I didn't have enough
me time today to try connecting
the Pearl to the Onyx I have.
Had to go to church.
I'm hoping the Onyx
will come to life a little more with its
partner.
One good thing I could say about it
is the packaging and form
of both Pearl and Onyx are nice.
The box?
The box?
The packaging.
It's a box.
It's just a box.
So this is about, like, using those two things in tandem to blow yourself, right?
How come nobody's done that yet?
They did.
They did.
They did, and it didn't work?
They gave themselves a blowjob
but then they had to switch to manual mode
right
sounds silly but I had that euphoric feeling
you get when you open box
with a new tech gadget in it
euphoric
check out my euphoric box opening
my hall videos
dildo videos on Pornhub
Pornhub premium
you gotta pay for that like, comment, subscribe opening dildo videos on Pornhub. Yeah, how come YouTube shut down their account? Pornhub Premium.
You gotta pay for that.
Like, comment, subscribe.
Alright.
I think this document,
34 pages,
very nice.
But we're gonna go to
a different place on
VR titties.
And John Toast,
I think I will let you choose which place we go titties. And John Toast, I think I will let you
choose which place we go to
next.
Your options are
adult peripherals
for VR use.
It's very dry.
Yeah, exactly.
And the other is
ejaculator.
I gotta go with Ejaculator.
At least they put a little verb on the name there.
I would have called it Ijaculator, but that's just me.
Well, Ijaculator in the 2010s, Ejaculator in the early 2000s.
Ejaculator has a thread.
A lot of these companies have their own thread on VR titties
because you need to reach out to your customer base.
No, fuck my robot!
And, John, you're going to be the spokesman for Ejaculator,
and you need to tell us about your product.
Hello there, everyone.
I am the founder of Ejaculator VR
and just wanted to stop by and say hi.
Hi.
Hi.
Ejaculator VR is a see-what-you-feel type of experience.
We're running an Indiegogo campaign
with nearly 70% funded.
Wonderful.
Okay.
Here's a URL.
Oh, I've already clicked it.
I bet you have.
If anyone has questions or wanted to discuss the possibility of VR porn based off your fantasies, let's hear them.
No, don't do that.
We're a new company, so we want to listen to VR porn viewers and what they want to expect from the experience.
Thanks, Eaculator. Are you so new to the porn business
that you don't know
that people are more than willing
to just say what they want everywhere on the internet?
You don't have to ask.
I just want to hear feedback from my customers.
What could go wrong?
The very first thing that happens
on the Indiegogo campaign,
which, by the way, 175% funded,
but the very first thing that happens is it Indiegogo campaign, which, by the way, 175% funded. But the very first thing that happens is
it says in big text,
Can I back this project anonymously?
Yes, you can!
What an interesting coincidence.
I'm gonna back it anonymously
before I back it anonymously.
There's two perks. One's
for $98, you get the ejaculator, and for's for $98 you get the ejaculator, and
for $135
you get the ejaculator and a VR headset.
I doubt that's what you actually get.
Oh, yay! A Google Cardboard with stains on it!
Yay!
Hi there!
Hi, what are you?
Hi there! My name is Mailtoys.
Mailtoys, hi!
Mailtoys.
This is an exciting product! Can you tell us more about the mechanism My name is Mailtoys. Mailtoys, hi. Mailtoys. Yeah. Mailtoys.
This is an exciting product.
Sure is.
Can you tell us more about the mechanism used by Ejaculator?
Is it a sleeve stroking action like in U2, Hurricane Stroker?
Or Easy Love, Telescopic Lover?
What?
Wow.
You're a fucking expert, dude.
Or, or, or, or,
does it rather resemble to auto blow two
beat stroking?
Jesus.
Beat stroking?
Do you need an auto blow?
No, the auto blow two.
No, I need an auto blow two.
Okay, okay.
Will there be a pause button slash function
in order to stop stimulation immediately?
Thus avoiding premature ejaculation?
I don't want to embarrass myself.
Bail out!
Hey there, it's Ejaculator again.
Hey Ejaculator.
Yes, Ejaculator works in a stroking motion.
The silicone is placed on arms in which is pulled in an up and down motion.
What?
So, imagine your hand stroking your penis
just minus the hand.
So just an arm.
An arm stroking at your penis.
So Jamie Lannister jacking off.
Just a mass of your penis.
Alright.
What's even more trippy is,
think of how magic works
Let's just ruminate on that for a second
Those are two separate sentences
Yeah
What's even more trippy is
Think of how magic works
Okay
What you see, what you hear
What you feel is what your mind believes
So
If your hands are relaxed by your side,
your encounter is up close and personal, on your head,
and your penis is getting stimulated.
Subconsciously, you're in a sexual fantasy land,
which is what we call hyper-realistic.
So, master...
I'm just explaining the concept of a sex toy at this point.
No, more words, please, more words.
Yes, there will definitely be an option to pause the ejaculator.
We actually, in fact, are planning on building a stamina kit with three different sleeves.
It's a chance it'll look like a fucked up pan flute if we make it.
Good chance.
The program will guide you from beginner to novice and then stud mode.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Hey, ladies.
Hey, I have divots in my penis from my sock.
You want to see?
Also,
I got some opinions about the Ghostbusters movie.
I'm a certified ejaculator
stud. Which one of you
will sleep with me?
Well, each level of the program gets
slightly more difficult.
Not sure what that exactly means.
My name is Testes.
Oh, you got it.
Larger than what girth measurement in inches would require the holy shit size period?
Holy shit sentence.
That's one where every time you fuck it, it does a holy shit from Unreal.
Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit.
Would a 6.5 inch girth, for example, be too large for either option?
Would it work if I stapled a soda can to my chest?
To my torso?
I mean, I'm just saying I can't get it off anymore, so I just gotta live with
what I got. I wanna be clear
on this. The motor will be strong enough
for a hands-free climax. I invested in
a Kiro, which turned out to be an expensive, massive
disappointment.
Like you.
What? Dad!
Dad! I enjoy the verb.
Get off the forum, Dad!
I'm trying to do research
for my readers.
Can I just say how much I enjoy
the verb invested there?
Yeah.
I mean, you know, in this
economy,
you gotta find what sells.
There's a message
appointment. So I am weary of another
purchase that can't truly
provide a hands-free
climax. Can you
tell us the max... It's an expensive
ticket. Can you tell us the maximum
strokes per second achievable?
We'll see SPS on this.
35 Highway.
Hi, it's Ejaculator.
Oh, hey.
Oh, hey there.
This is why it's called the holy fuck size.
I was looking for the holy shit size.
You can easily take your size.
Oh, okay.
Easily.
Don't worry about it.
I mean, are you sure?
Because I have a really super big cock.
Don't, don't.
I'm sure.
It's going to take all the best sizes.
So much.
About the motor.
Our company hired a top motor specialist.
What?
I got a degree for this shit.
This is what I do.
Who has over 10 plus years experience with all kinds of DC motors.
Oh, over 10 plus years.
He advised us the best motor profiles.
It was hard tracking down a factory that didn't rape us in pricing for samples.
Hey, ejaculator.
You know what I'm talking about? I don't think I like you. Hey, ejaculator. You know what I'm talking about.
I don't think I like you.
Hey, ejaculator.
Ha ha.
Mm-hmm.
Maybe there's some words you could probably avoid speaking
when talking about sex products.
You mean what?
Position or stroking or...
What?
Factory.
Oh.
Okay.
Yeah, I'm sorry.
I was about to say factory.
I sincerely apologize.
On behalf of the company.
Anyways, most motor factories wanted $500 plus for each motor.
Having seven different profiles with four samples each, that would be close to $15,000.
Insane, right?
So wait, so $500 for each motor and then each setting
has its own motor?
Don't think about it too long.
Alright, I won't.
Finally, one large motor factory
decided to work with us
and made us these specialized motors
for our specs.
From there, we have tested every single one.
We put the
lowest bidders motors right next to your penis.
Because we care about our customers.
We tested every single one.
Don't test every single one.
I personally tested every single one.
Testing for speed, for durability, and ultimately to ensure
it's strong enough.
The strokes per second.
Holy shit, dude. Are you
masturbating for a marathon or something?
No, because that doesn't make any
sense. That's not how marathons work.
A marathon. No.
What? No. It's rich.
Anyways, I can tell you the strokes
per minute. They will range from 40 all the way up to 120,
depending on the speed it's at.
I don't think you can tell him the strokes per minute, then.
I keep answering gross questions all through this thread, apparently.
You sure do.
40?
I keep going.
I never stop.
You'll see me in your dreams.
You'll never forget my voice.
Just buy my product.
And then, Kumquat's up.
While we were looking at that thread,
what did you find on Patreon?
Going down a Kumquat sidebar.
Yay!
Yay!
It's a joy.
Who has a new Patreon?
I'm excited about Patreons these days.
It is trying economic times.
You need some side income
for your
robo
orifices. Right.
And the VR Titties team
is creating VR Titties,
an Oculus Rift-enabled erotic
game. Ew, gross.
We currently have
939 patrons
at $867
per month. And
why VRTitty's team is on Patreon.
Early development of VR
Friend Zone Simulator.
Oh no! No!
Never! No!
No, no, no, no, no, no.
I just wanted to point out something here.
Yeah, I was about to say
you said 939, but I got 940
when I pulled up the page. Which one of you just got onto this?
Because it wasn't me, I think.
I know you want to know what VR Titties is.
Actually, excuse me, VR Titties.
Right.
VR Titties is an erotic game enabled for the Oculus Rift Virtual Reality headset.
The game is created using the Unreal Engine. You do not need an Oculus Rift virtual reality headset. The game is created using the Unreal
Engine. You do not need an
Oculus Rift to play this game.
Everybody's going to look really sweaty and I've got to turn the shadows
off. What do I need?
The game features are
a gorgeous fully customizable model,
user or automatically controlled animations,
character expressions,
physics blended with the females
animations, dynamic jizz particles
we are dynamic jizz particles i'd like to learn more about the social networking
like facilities of this company that makes these can you you read me the bios on both the Twitter and the YouTube accounts?
Oh, boy.
Oh, boy. How exciting.
Very top.
Very top.
There's a Twitter. Oh, no. That doesn't work.
I know.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, scroll up to the very top.
Oh.
I see what you did there.
The YouTube account says this account has been suspended due to multiple or severe violations of
YouTube's policy against spam, gaming, misleading
content, or other terms of service
violations. I wonder what that
could have been.
Hey guys, you all like
virtual reality
porn, right? You're all super into
porn on your Oculus, aren't you?
Well, now I am.
So, I want
to talk to you about the Hermione
VR demo.
Hey, would you like
Hermione to masturbate in
VR for you?
What if she looks like a Silent Hill character?
Would that make it better?
Oh, yeah.
Hans Gruber VR. Oh, God. So so i found this thing on tumblr it's
like my dreams came true and then uh boots you are frezza yeah adi k hats off for the guy's mad
skills but i don't find cgi porn particularly arousing weird. There's always a degree of
uncanny valley. I'm not convinced
it'll be fixed anytime soon.
I prefer actual footage.
Of Hermione masturbating?
It's like these virtual people aren't
really alive.
Ring, ring, ring. Hello, Emma Watson?
I have a proposition for you.
How would you like to make a couple thousand dollars?
I know you're hard up
on money.
It's okay. It's not pornography. There's two cameras.
Alright.
So we, I think we're
going to leave
VR Titties for a little while.
I know, it's a wonderful place.
But there's so much more
that we can cover here.
Including, we are
now going to be headed off to...
Oh, God.
Oh, sorry.
I just saw one of the links.
Oh, no.
Oh, you know what?
I'm sorry.
I meant to say that we were getting off VR titties.
I was wrong, because before we get off VR titties, I want to tell you about Illusion Artificial Girl 3.
This is a topic that has been read
30,999 times.
And I'm Vela.
Hey guys.
Possessive.
I just got two more games working her.
First up,
Illusion Artificial Girl 3.
Install, add them
in
TRI Def in TRI
DEF.
Yeah, add them in TRI DEF.
That's one better than
HIDEF.
Now,
you'll probably
find out it won't work.
But,
here's the trick.
Shut off Windows Arrow.
Try again.
Greets.
That's good.
I was tired of getting cock-blocked by my Windows theme, so thanks.
Must get message out while still masturbating.
This game is actually
this game is actually
pretty hot, man.
To be in the middle of the action
with the cam is
really nice. To get the show
on the road, use cheats.
Cheats?
Yeah, no. Like, we're in it for
the experience, man. I'm not into the lore.
I mean, sure, you want to take 300 hours into leveling up your fuck girl.
I mean, you know, go ahead, but that's not what I'm into.
I got fucking business deals to close, okay?
Fine.
Press CTR-Shift-S.
Find that on your keyboard.
Center-Shift.
Yep.
Then bring the letter E, Etchy.
Etchy is their horniness.
This gives the action smiley face.
Up in B, Bath.
So they take a bath.
Space period space. Or S, Sleep,
to find them in their bed.
J, Jilawis,
to zero.
L, Love,
bring this one up to max. Smiley face.
P equals P.
H equals hungry.
F equals friend.
P hungry friend.
I am P hungry friend.
That's a future episode.
And I just like that in the
doc, the very next title after that was
Do you like VR porn as it is now?
No, maybe not.
You fucking press button, fuck.
I gotta admit, I gotta admit,
if I were making a game,
the primary candidate for a key binding for P
would be P.
Yeah, that makes sense.
Oh god, I've not done any of this in incognito.
Shit.
Oh, me either.
IDD comdy.
Alright.
This next link is terrible.
So we are going to go to the VR
sex lab. That's Second Life,
Oculus Rift, and Porn.
The future of sex entertainment?
Of course you are.
So this is a sort of...
This looks like the tech crunch of VR fucking.
And Boots, if you'll start us off here, please.
I'm Jesse.
Badoink VR. It's like she's fucking you. I'm Jesse. Hi, please. I'm Jesse. Badoink VR.
It's like she's fucking you.
I'm Jesse.
Hi, Jesse.
Hi, Jesse.
We're hearing a lot of buzz lately about how excited users of Second Life are that the game may be fully supported using Oculus Rift.
All that buzz we hear is from their robotic pussies.
Yeah, you can hear them talking.
It's like, I don't know, the Second Life graphics are so great,
but what if they were right in my face?
It seems fairly evident, no,
that Oculus and Second Life are really a match made in heaven.
When I first tried Second Life,
although I enjoyed the virtual world, I really
felt like the feeling of immersion was missing.
Alright.
Okay.
So, like, in the Matrix,
whenever, when you're like,
how did the people get
into the Robopods in the first place?
I think it's this. I think they, like,
lure us in with this.
This is the bait for the Matrix
takeover. Come in, human!
This is the best sex you will ever
experience! You can't have sex with one
of your gross meat women.
Lay in this pool.
It's pink goo.
Lay in the goo.
I like pink goo.
Make your own goo. Mix the goo. Make your own goo.
Mix the goo.
This was well before the riff was announced, and now it's available.
Although we haven't received ours yet, I'm excited by the possibilities.
I'm sure you are.
A video posted on Second Life YouTube page shows recent updates and improvements ends with a guy playing Second Life with an Oculus and the words virtual reality headset support coming soon.
The video was only just posted on September 26.
Excellent.
Let's scroll down for a little while here into it does feel like it does feel like. It does feel like
we're a ways...
It does feel like we're a ways off from this being
available. But considering the demand
for such an experience, it may be here sooner
than we expect.
So much of the potential of these games
for sex applications will depend on third
party developers and sex hardware
manufacturers.
I get it.
Larger development companies like Linden Lab I get it.
Oh, I think they've given up second life to perverts far, like, years ago,
so they might be more open than you think.
This is one of the reasons why the potential VR headsets from Sony for the PS4
will most likely not have any future
sex games. I can think of
some other reasons why.
Sony, although they don't develop, is
simply not in the business
of running implicit games.
No, I agree.
I agree. I don't know what that means.
Warning, implicit content. I agree. I don't know what that means. Warning, implicit content.
I love when people use a word that's the exact opposite of what they meant to use.
The global demand for virtual sex experiences is simply too gigantic for many of these developers to ignore.
And for those that do not face any real barriers to entering this market, the reward is potentially great.
There will be, however, many failures on the way to the top before someone finally develops a game that is acceptable to the masses.
Hey, they're called customers, okay?
How dare you.
And when that happens, it will surely change only porn forever.
Only porn.
You know, Adam?
Yeah?
You know how you keep saying, oh man, we need to go to Reddit
all the time and look at Reddit?
Well, congratulations, buddy.
You're getting your wish.
Did I say that?
I feel like that's you that said that.
Yeah, I think so.
Do you remember when this was? Like, what day this was
when we were talking about this? I mean, it was...
Let's see. I was asleep. Was I
there?
Was I there when I
said this? Alright, so we are going to
be going to r slash Oculus
NSFW.
Oh, yeah!
Well, I mean, outside of
sex, I think an Oculus would be
not safe for work either. Bump it into everything.
Orgphorasm.
So your name is
Orgphorism.
Orgphorism.
Orgphorism.
I hated when they started naming
orgasms like this.
What are your opinions that you need to share about orgasms,
you fucking creepo?
Irritating things
in every VR
porn video!
I'm sure that all of us here
want much more intimacy
and close,
general close-ups.
Face, tits, pussy and ass in these videos.
But I'm specifically
talking about a minor
butt becoming
a major annoyance
that crops up in seemingly
every video I've seen.
One-eyed syndrome.
I saw the word minor and I blacked out for a second.
Sorry.
No, I'm talking about one-eyed
syndrome.
Now, I don't know about
you, but when I talk to someone,
I generally look at both eyes.
Or generally
at the whole face.
I doubt that.
Knowing what I know about you right now,
I think eye contact isn't your thing.
I look at the face
at least once.
I see into your soul. It makes my
pee-pee rise. When porn models
are looking at you,
close-up and
VR porn videos, they
all make the
same mistake of only concentrating
purely on one
camera lens and not both.
What?
Ideally, between both eyes lenses.
Both.
So you want them to split their eyes, to look in two different directions simultaneously?
Yes.
I want these porno actresses to be comfortable looking at two cameras at once.
Look at me. Look into at once. Look at me.
Look into my eyes.
Look at me.
I need to see the sin in your soul.
Of course,
having them look at you close up
to one eye is better than them
not doing it at all, but it's just
another thing that can easily be avoided.
Like, prolonged
leaning back cowgirl. What?
What?
Ugh. Ugh.
I think the position is just a girl.
Too much leaning back cowgirl.
Like prolonged leaning back
cowgirl.
I get it. I'm tired.
I think that position is
just a girl falling off the bed.
Like I can't picture anything else.
Thoughts?
Yeah, I have thoughts.
My name is Reddit Salia.
Yeah.
Man noises.
Man hands.
These are bullet points.
Yes.
Lack of face close-ups.
Lack of breast vaginal face close-ups. Lack of breast
vaginal butt close-ups.
Lack of
mouth play kissing.
What?
Go somewhere else.
No. No, I go into
the world where all of the ladies want
to have sex with me.
Mouth play?
Mouth play. Mouth play.
That's okay.
Yeah, don't give me a lack of that.
If you're a content producer,
just please post here
and say,
we acknowledge these things.
And then, John, you are a
sart.
I'm sart.
Sart.
H-S-A-R-T.
There it is.
Not strictly VR issues, but
porn in general.
Oh, God.
The need to get undressed ASAP.
I have a thing for
attractive slash cute clothing slash outfit
heels, etc. The internet
is flooded with all the nudity one
will ever want, but women
getting it on in dresses
or skirts is hot.
Heels are hot.
Please, spend a third
or half the video dressed up.
These women are having sex in front of a camera crew for you.
Not good enough!
No, not for me.
If they were having it for me, they'd be keeping their underwear on for four minutes longer.
Exactly.
Leaning back cowgirl, you
whore!
Yay.
I get it.
You want to show
penetration.
Woo.
There's plenty of time
for that in the video.
And it's not like I haven't seen it a million
times now. Keep the dress slash skirt on slash down. Ride. And it's not like I haven't seen it a million times now.
Keep the dress slash skirt on slash down.
Ride.
Take it off later.
The anal opera scene...
Pause for laughter.
The Phantom of the Opera.
He's here.
That won't wind up in a Looney Tunes parody.
Man, Final Fantasy VI is way different than I remember.
But you're game jokes.
The anal opera scene was particularly disappointing for that reason.
She looked great in the dress, and it was often a tilde five minutes.
And then there's theme stuff.
Awesome.
A hot maid slash cop slash teacher slash nurse slash whatever.
Right, right.
Okay, good, good.
Yep.
Ellipsis with an extra period. And now four minutes in, you've taken off all the clothing that identified you
as a maid slash nurse slash teacher slash
cosplay character, and you're another
random porn actress?
Wait a minute, I don't actually think you're a maid at all!
Show me your maid ID!
Ah! Ah!
I'm a maid! Ah! Ah!
I'm a maid!
Sometimes I just want there to be a giant blackout for
these guys to just snap
and kill themselves in five minutes.
No power!
The women in my porn
are naked!
Guys, I still have some points to make, alright?
And unless there's a foot job
or some foot-centric action,
keep the heels on, please.
So I love porn, I hate naked women, gotcha.
Okay.
Yep.
I'm probably in the minority on that, though.
Edit.
I'll also point out something I think is obvious.
Accents are hot.
You like mine?
One of the best scenes I've come across is Doorstep Cellar with Lina Nilsson.
Great accent. And she's vocal.
Not overly moaning
vocal. She's speaking.
Hello.
I am having sex with you.
Hello. I am on your doorstep.
Would you like to buy a vacuum cleaner?
I am clothed. Would you like
to buy one of our selections of doorsteps?
I have shoes.
Don't take off your doorstep seller uniform.
It's great.
I'd love to have some Scottish or Irish.
That's not capitalized, so I'm... George Leal looks and sounds great.
Okay.
Ooh, wow.
Doorstep seller looks really good.
Looking at a doorstep seller right now.
You're scaring me.
Okay, this might
surprise you.
This might surprise you, but there's actually
multiple threads on
this subreddit where people have
strong opinions about pornography.
I'm going to take us on a slight aside.
Okay.
Currently, the number two most popular post on the subreddit is,
Waifu sex simulator not working on Vive.
Let's hope Valve patches that.
I got to say, I forgot how Reddit worked,
and I clicked on the link that just took me to Reddit
rather than a subreddit.
And then it was Bill Clinton kissing my grandma's friend.
That's Oculus VR, I want to say.
Yeah, exactly.
Front page Reddit.
Okay, so...
Yeah, so this is another thread on the Oculus NSFW.
And, uh... Vootz! what do you have to say here?
I am Asmodunk999.
Ha ha!
Hmm.
Asmodunk.
I understand that the first six months or year,
every site is trying to get the tech down,
figure out the best way to shoot stuff
so they need to stay within safeties of known boundaries,
which is great.
Oh, sorry, I forgot my title.
Yeah, what is your title?
The tech is getting there.
How about creativity?
All right.
Yeah, how about it?
Keep going.
Figure the tech out first.
But at this point,
pretty much every site I go to have the same POV scenes.
I can easily interchange them
and no one can tell the difference.
Every site is a fade from black.
Right.
One to two girls enter the room,
get undressed,
fuck you,
occasionally switch...
No, fuck you!
Fuck you!
No, fuck you!
Hey, hey!
No fighting on Reddit!
Oh, alright.
That's true.
There are never arguments on reddit i'm sorry
occasionally switch to standing pov which i hate because i'm not actually standing there thrusting
what the fuck so now i'm back to watching someone else fuck as opposed to immersion
i mean it's time to go for creativity i don't care if things look a little wonky, but gamble a bit. There's a
lot of things I would want to
specifically say.
There's a lot of things I would want to see
in POV. Let someone smother
me or sit on my face.
Anything else besides POV or
solo girl strip teasing. Just my
two cents. Wait, but you're still
with an Oculus Rift with your dick
in your hand, so at that point, what, you put a
pillow over your own face?
I'll smother him.
I'll do it.
I'll do it.
Oh, Asmodunk,
when will you reach
the day you're looking for when
VR Clips for Sale is a site?
And then, Adam, you are
Bamsi Boy.
I agree with
you that we need more
diversity, and I am
sure it will come down
the road, without a doubt,
as more headsets become
available among consumers.
Right now, as I
understand it, even with the release
of the Rift and the Vive
VR, is still a very
limited market compared to
regular porn, and I think
unfortunately that
have most content creators
banging on the
beautiful girls
versus man
hardcore
movies.
Man hardcore.
Let me go back.
They have most content creators
banging on the quote, beautiful
girl or girls versus
man hardcore.
I am man hardcore.
Okay, okay, okay.
Fight.
I understand.
So that is how you are describing heterosexual sex.
Yes.
Beautiful girls versus men.
Beautiful girl or girls versus men hardcore.
It's telling that the word versus is used in sexual intercourse.
Versus.
Yeah, there's a little bit of an implication there.
Versus.
Okay, go on.
And it doesn't help that every time a content creator does something new,
they get practically publicly roasted.
Great, yeah, let me go through your post history.
Oh, man, the Friars Club roast of the VR porn magnates is pretty good.
That was the cleanest one.
That's true.
However, I am also torn a bit
because I also think that a site should stay fairly within what they started out with,
meaning I don't want to see a site that does POV hardcore scenes
suddenly start filming
third-person humiliation scenes
of a guy in a cage
disrespecting anyone that
likes that.
Why are you throwing up?
It's like you're disgusting yourself somehow.
No, I live with a sickness
inside of me. The internet
numbs!
It's not
easy being gross.
I was talking about
fucking robots anyway.
I, myself,
am waiting desperately for the
mature slash taboo
category to be explored
by a site
hopefully dedicated only to
that. But I guess I have to
wait a while. These guys really
just want VR clips for sale.
It's not even a joke.
And then, um,
This guy's upset that there isn't enough
fake stepmom incest porn.
That's true.
Why can't the stepmoms have my stepmom's
name?
And keep on their
stepmom uniform.
Look, unless there's
stepmom foot stuff going on, make sure
to keep your stepmom heels on.
Stepmom. I getcha.
And then
come to us if you'll just finish this off
with Org Forsum.
Org Forsum.
Org Forsum.
Org Forsum.
I'm Org Forsum.
I'm a simple man
with simple VR
pleasures.
Just give me videos with big tits,
Ava Adams size at minimum,
and ass in my face.
No story, no 15 men's blowjob,
no actual sex.
Lol.
Yeah, you're a simple man. You're a simple man.
I want a chick with big tits to crush my face with her ass.
Like all guys do.
From the internet.
I want to strap on my magic glasses and have the big tit lady smack me in the face with her butt.
Smack me.
Smack my face with her butt.
I can't smoke anymore!
With a name like
Titsmackers, it has to be good.
Hello, my name is Cinnamon Wild.
And this is
my... You're my least favorite candle.
You're gonna smell me.
You're gonna smell me.
Oh!
This is my first sexual experience with the Oculus Rift CV1.
No solo play.
Read on.
It gets juicy.
Shut down computer.
Throw out window.
Goodbye.
I'm coming back in your room.
No more computers.
I showed up in your Oculus Rift,
and I'm going to tell you this story in person.
No.
Sex, Freddy.
Here's the first four letters of my post.
NSFW.
Wow.
Thank you.
Hey, Ted, what you reading there?
Oh, The porn
Oculus Rift?
Is that a safe-for-work thread?
Anyway, I've been dating this girl
for a while. Let's call her
Alice, who's been excited
to try VR.
She, the real person, came over last
night and I ran her
through a few of the Rift
demos. Dream deck.
You've never done Rift before, Alice?
You guys heard of Techno?
She really liked the
Yeah, Toast got it.
She really liked the experience
and thought Henry was
the cutest little hedgehog.
Oh god, this is gonna turn into Sonic,
isn't it? Shit.
Hopefully.
Alice then asked me what VR porn was like.
We both enjoy adult entertainment.
It's like porn, but on face.
It's porn, but closer.
It's close to face and eyes.
It's porn, but with motion sickness.
is close to face and eyes.
It's porn, but with motion sickness.
I described what I had experienced so far.
She sounded excited and asked me if she could try it.
I explained that there was
very little content starring girls
as the person whose POV you're seeing,
except I had this one lesbian clip where two girls go at each other i'm not going to
click that link alice slipped on my headset and started watching she started with the usual
comments oh she's like a bad actress and wow that's corny after a while yeah that's corny
like this video after a while she started getting comfortable's corny. After a while,
she started getting comfortable and
slid down into
a more lie-down position
to match the BOP actress.
So she was lying down then.
No, she slid down into a lie-down position.
To a more lie-down position.
And then she stepped up on her move legs
and made forward motion.
I've never seen a woman do this in real life before.
Oh, shit, you're horizontal.
Whoa, fuck.
Oh, well, that's how it happens.
What sorcery is this?
I asked her to describe what was happening in the clip.
I'm rubbing her clit, she said.
I think she's about to lick my pussy.
Taking that as my cue, I pulled off her panties.
Oh, this is the realest story ever.
Bent over and slowly
started eating her pussy.
Oh my god, that's so unreal!
She exclaimed and started giggling.
Speaking of
corny.
That's so Unreal Engine 4,
she exclaimed.
This is kind of like that scene in Revenge of the Nerds.
Yeah, absolutely it is.
My name is Cliffy B.
After a few minutes of sweet cunnilingus, she told me,
oh, she's taking out a big black dildo.
Then I'll just take out my big black...
Big black dildo.
Keep on rolling. I had seen... Well, then I'll just take out my big black... Big black dildo.
Keep on rolling.
A big black dildo.
Well, I have a big... I had seen this part of the clip
so I knew what was about to happen
she fucked it
spoilers
oh whoa whoa watch this part
it's so good
if you see a dildo
in the first act of a porn
someone will get fucked
thanks Chekhov the first act of a porn, someone will get fucked with it.
Thanks, Chekov.
So for some reason I told her,
I don't want you to use that word.
That is her cock,
and she is about to fuck you with it.
Alice told me that,
quote,
she's rubbing her cock up and down my pussy, which I was quick to imitate.
The next time Alice opened her mouth, she said, I think she's about to.
At which point, I thrust myself deep into her, extracting a cry of surprise, which I harnessed in a jar, and pleasure from my guest.
I asked her, tell me how she's fucking you.
Alice replied, much too slow.
And small. And stinky.
I enjoyed
teasing, so I slowed down.
Alice whispered.
Wimp whippered. Alice
wipered. Alice wipered
and begged me to go faster.
The fucking part of the scene
was short. When the girl
switched, Alice said
I want to see you.
Yeah.
And pulled off the headset.
Her eyes were...
No! You keep it on!
The Beauty and the Beast Part 2!
Her eyes were startled
after having the headset on.
As an avid... Oh, God, you! I forgot
it was you. Oh, God. She looked like
they were freaking the fuck out smiling.
As an avid
fan of our Oculus, the
Oculus face marks left by the headset
was kind of a turn-on for me.
Guys, we witnessed the birth of a beautiful new face.
Wow, with those rings around your eyes,
you look like a raccoon.
Oh, I'm going down a new road.
Can we frame that sentence? Oh, I'm going down a new road. Can we frame that sentence?
Oh, sure!
I'll put it in needlepoint.
But first I started fucking her
harder and faster.
Grandma,
I've been meaning to ask you about this one.
I really...
The Oculus face marks left by the headset
was kind of a turn-on for me.
What?
I started fucking her harder and faster,
which brought her back to reality
in a very good way.
Oh, God, what am I doing?
Yeah, it's what she...
Yeah.
It's the cold, icy reality
where you're having sex with me.
I fucked the ennui right into her.
After we were finished,
I asked her if she'd consider
doing the same
for me.
She lit up and said,
I haven't even considered it,
but I would love to.
Find a scene you really like and we'll make that happen.
Every girl's fantasy.
Fucking a man with magic glasses who's pretending to fuck somebody else.
Yeah.
A man watching the television.
Yes.
Footnotes.
That happened before she went off to shower.
TLDR. Yeah, you'll do that. Great. We happened before she went off to shower. Mm-hmm.
TLDR.
Yeah, you'll do that.
Great, we'll make it happen.
TLDR, I became a sexy pretend girl named Misha Cross
and fucked the living daylights out of a real girl named Alice.
Yeah, real girl, huh?
Okay.
Thank you, Oculus Rift.
Wait, was his Oculus Rift thing that scene where the woman is wearing the Oculus Rift! Wait, was his Oculus Rift thing
that scene where the woman is wearing the Oculus Rift?
Oh my god, wow.
And then she...
Hey, hey, hey.
What, hi?
Hey, my name's Unapolamu.
Okay.
Unapolamu.
Yeah.
Nice.
I'm going to try this.
What?
What?
Tell me who she is, I'll get her.
Oh, fuck. Sex hadn't occurred to me.
Thanks for the idea, bro.
Hey, come back to my house and put on these fuck goggles.
Where are you going?
Put on the glasses.
Put the glasses on!
Put them on!
No, man, no.
Oh, my God.
All right, I know, okay, we have so much more to read,
but VR Porn Star, please.
John Toast, VR Porn Star.
And the same thread here.
Okay, so I've done this a number of times.
Mostly through with the girl on me.
Alright, those are words.
So I've had a girl blow me while watching Blowjob in the scene
and have them ride me while watching a girl ride me in the video.
Okay.
God damn it.
It works pretty well, but against the synchronicity is off,
and it kind of ruins the experience in a way.
Well, don't listen to the police, and you'll be fine.
Dear porn makers.
Maybe you should take the Gloggles off.
Take the Gloggles off!
Gloggles?
Gloggles?
Take the Gloggles off! Take the goggles off!
I'm sorry, I'm just so upset.
It's just like, I'm having real sex while
I'm just...
You are a redundant human
being and your money is wasted.
This many
episodes in and we finally broke
Bozart. That's great.
No, I started broken.
Fair enough. but when you have when you have no money and these guys like no i've got a thousand dollars to watch porn while having sex it's just like well the nadir it's you know i know what that
is that's just jealousy that's just jealousy because you don't have a whole lot of money
you wish that you had the money that you could spend on on vr goggles that you could have while having sex right i could turn it into like
food if i had that money i mean yeah you could but you shouldn't
not and not food that i'd fuck food no no because the thing is okay there's two pleasures that
you're missing out on first obviously move sex uh but
then the watching the vr while having sex but then the third thing is that you get to brag about that
experience on reddit and that's true pleasure and also complain about it oh yeah the phantom
third pleasure of complaining on reddit i got i got a letter i wrote by the way
do you have do you have any more to say there dear porn makers
this is what we need is real innovation and a crazy dollar sign dollar sign dollar sign maker
a two-part video one from the male perspective and one from the female perspective they are
synced up together and give directions and have a rhythm visualizer that is sort of a sex metronome.
Does he know how complicated that would be to do?
It would have to be a completely choreographed fuck.
Yeah. Like, completely.
Efficiency.
Otherwise, you'd have two people wearing
cameras looking at each other.
Look, I just want to stick
my dick in the Windows Media Visualizer
is all. Just don't judge
me.
Just want to watch two actors
with GoPro helmets?
Fuck.
I thought he was going more of in like an audio surf direction there.
Oh, that would be fun.
Oh, my God.
Challenge mode.
Yeah.
Well, okay.
Here, let me explain a little bit more.
The girl wears her headset.
The guy wears his, and they can both be different costumed or fetish characters.
You know, I mean, they don't have to be.
These are just examples.
Just random examples.
What's cool...
As if this wasn't cool enough.
What's cool
is that the other person doesn't even need
to know what you choose.
Release it for Gear VR when we have
no wires and you'll be off to the bank.
I hate you.
Hey, do you want
a lot of money? Recreate
sex.
You're welcome,
Shark Tank.
Did you think of that yet?
Anybody think of this?
Okay.
Boy, oh my god. There's a bunch
more of these specific things
where there's a lot of this
combining sex
and Oculus Rift.
And
that is
soul-crushing.
But, instead we're going to move on to just a title that I love.
And Kumquatsop, your name is Pornulous Rift.
And what is the title of your post there?
Yes, hello, my name is Pornulous Rift.
BJ Simulator with
adjustable dick morphs
adjustable lick speed and
dickhead eye tracking
BJ Simulator
with adjustable dick morphs
Dickhead eye tracking?
Dickhead eye tracking
Dickhead eye tracking
You guys didn't have BJ Simulator
the 12 inch G.I. Joe with the adjustable leg speed?
I thought he was the hero for the new Wolfenstein.
BJ Simulator is.
Blow up that pussy, BJ.
Nazis are everywhere.
Sticking my dick in another one now.
It's cold morning.
Update!
The 0011
now has a full working keyboard
controls. Oh, thank God.
Great.
Update!
Blend shape animation tutorial posted
on VRTitties.
Does it have flight yoke
controls?
Um. Yeah, and then, uh. VR titties! Does it have flight yoke controls?
Yeah, and then... A bunch of links.
Hey, BJ, I've got a question.
Is what?
Is the tongue animated?
Yes, the tongue is animated!
Oh, thank God!
Yes, you can control the speed!
Yes, the girl's head keeps angled
to the dick.
It's always going towards the dick like her neck
stretches out. Is there like a cloud
and everyone else is angled to your dick as well?
Yes!
The front of the dick
keeps angled to her head.
No matter where she is in the world, if you're like, you know,
if you're in Australia, she just
kind of put it down.
The front of the dick gets angled to her head.
Okay, that sounds actually kind of fun.
Woo!
Woo!
It's VR dousing dick.
The dick gets angled to her head.
Yes! Her gaze
also periodically switches
between your eyes and the dick.
It doesn't just stare off into a thousand yards.
Again.
Mom needs a surgery.
Please let me know what you think and what impossible improvements I could add.
What are good aspects and bad aspects of this implementation?
I could add. What are good aspects and bad aspects of this implementation?
Imagine if you had a stem positional tracker as a belt buckle and synced up to the dick position.
I am proud to be nominated for the dick position. Synced up to the dick position.
I'll be posting a tutorial on VRTitties.com this weekend. This wasn't done with traditional animation,
but by adding a blend-shaped controller to adjust the morphs over time,
I have no experience animating monsters.
Oh, dear.
Okay, you know what?
I actually wasn't excited about the game until now.
All I need now is a Millennium Falcon stage!
I'm RoboTardis.
Fuck you, internet.
I'm RoboTardis. Why does the
penis have bumps?
That's a pretty good reading of that, Motocon.
And so, why does the penis have bumps,
fornilusrift?
Not bumps, veins, lol!
One of the morphs hides them!
Ooh.
Alright, one more
post from this thread
specifically about our
opinions on porn.
This is feedback from a VR porn consumer.
Here's my feedback on the current state of VR porn
after looking through many gigs of content.
VR porn is way more intimate than 2D porn.
If the talent isn't into it,
or they're having a bad day,
it's obvious and disappointing.
You can really tell...
You can see the regret etched on their face in every frame.
No, that's great, but sometimes that's not the case.
If they have that glint in their eye,
and it's very addictive when they do,
try to find people who have real chemistry together
and give them off-camera time to get into character.
Here's the thing about Americans.
It's like,
look, I know you have a shitty
job, but smile.
Can you act like you enjoy it?
You're bumming me out is all I'm saying.
Record the audio from
the virtual ear position.
It's important.
What?
Oh, okay.
I guess like surround sound?
I don't know.
This is one thing I'd really appreciate.
Please accurately label how the scene ends.
Oral, vaginal, anal, cream pie, handjob, facial, etc.
The only scenes that really do it for me are the cream pies.
Only scenes that really do it for me are the cream pies.
And I'd like to avoid wasting my bandwidth and money on things that will ultimately disappoint me.
You know what all of these are reminding me of?
That Buddy Rich tape where he's yelling at his band because they weren't tight enough.
Right, yeah, yeah.
It's just like these guys are yelling at the people who make their VR porn.
It's like, look, I'm trying to do something up there.
I'm trying to conduct this amazing orgasm,
and I need to know how it's going to end.
You guys are unprofessional.
How am I supposed to have the mightiest orgasm in the world?
And when I slice, I slice like a hammer.
Look, I just really look forward to reading the not always right story
about when this guy gets kicked out of a porn store and everybody applauds.
Anyway, so I have some more things, including...
Sure do.
I want a sexy, flirty warm-up that's five to ten minutes.
What?
Sexy, flirty warm-up.
Yeah, a sexy, flirty warm-up.
I like I'm not superhuman 40 minutes of continuous sex.
It's something I seldom have time or stamina for.
It's like, dude, just turn it off!
Just stop masturbating! No, I have to get to the end!
I have to get to the end of the cum shot
unless it's not a cream pie.
Then my day is ruined.
So I went sexy flirty warm-up
of 5-10 minutes, then 10-15 minutes
of max of actual sex.
Then a nice long
cool-down at the end.
5 minutes.
Almost every single cream pie scene has the guy pulling the dick out
like it's on fire.
Maybe it is.
Something a bit more natural and relaxed
at the end. He's been fucking for 40
minutes. He's been fucking
for probably an hour and a half.
Anyway,
so those are my opinions. And then
Boots, you're a Bamsi boy.
You have a bunch of opinions,
but you can truncate those down a little bit,
can't you?
Yeah, you have a lot of opinions.
Well, I'll give my feedback.
This is subjectively to me and what
I like to see in VR, what I don't like
to see. I am very much aligned with
the OP, so I apologize for repeating some things.
Anyway, here goes.
I don't want to hear the male actors at all in POV scenes.
Duct tape them if needs be.
It ruins the experience completely
when I have to imagine this body is mine.
Because, you know.
Yeah, you have to imagine this body is yours.
And then suddenly I hear him moan in my ears,
suddenly become an invisible ghost and said,
Be quiet!
I'm watching you fuck the lady!
Be quiet as you fuck the lady!
I got cock-blocked by your cock!
Much more focus on the GFE.
Okay.
Girlfriend experience?
Girlfriend experience.
Oh, there we go. I'm'm sorry that came to me so fast
I thought maybe it was guy fucking everything
I like that better
Guy fucking the world
Guy Fieri ejaculation
No
No
It's cummy, it's orgasmy
Stop it
Ever seen a fat super saiyan cum Shut up Oh, it's cummy, it's orgasmy, it's... Stop it!
Ever seen a fat Super Saiyan cum?
Makes you want to cum doggy sauce on this?
Terrible factors.
Terrible people. You're flying for the Oculus Rift already.
I don't know what you guys are talking about.
You can watch Sky Fieri
cum donkey sauce on a
flip-flop in CGI already.
And yes, his head
angles towards the dick.
The pain's optional.
I'm fucking dead.
Anything else?
Bye, my new cumps.
I'm okay.
Again, in regards to the GFE,
the girlfriend experience, we need a lot more cream pies and VR porn.
We sure do.
Okay.
We sure do.
I'd much rather have a long buildup where the actress is verbal,
expresses she wants all of me inside her,
and a lot of sweet, playful talking things about that until the climax is near,
and she directly states she wants me to come inside her.
Something along the lines of, oh, yes, come in me, sweetie, darling, love, honey.
Mr. Obama, I voted for you because I thought you said things would change.
Well, I mean, they've definitely changed.
I think that's definitely happened.
Not in the way I specifically want.
How come all of my virtual sex slaves are so uppity?
I mean, I said yes we can, and yes you could.
In continuation of the regular girl slash woman,
I would love to see much more MILFs, Matures, GILFs in VR.
I'd like to see the
taboo older woman versus younger man
incest role plays
plays niches
to
explored
What?
It's explored. That's how that's spelled.
Younger man incest role plays
niches to explored
in this regard.
What happened there?
Uh, got too excited.
Okay.
Cream pie.
Cream pie.
Cream pie in my hand.
Cream pie.
Cream pie.
But again with the above points
about intimacy, close-ups, sweet talking, and whispering, kissing, and so on taken into account,
and not just a repeat of what happens in regular 2D porn in these niches,
I would pay good money for a site that explores these niches.
You people are fucking like it's 2014.
You disgust me.
Finally, and this might just be me, but I am tired of the big cocks in porn and all the cock-sized worship.
Okay.
Thank you.
I mean, this guy's a feminist when you think about it.
Thank you.
Why is it always that?
How am I going to live up to that kind of body standard?
This two-CD set, big cocks of porn.
I hate that this is carried over to VR port as well. For me, it destroys the illusion when I look down at my virtual body
and I see an 8 or 9 inch cock and hear the woman talk about
how amazed she are with how big it is.
She are.
Don't get me wrong, I don't want to be replaced by the opposite end of the scale.
I just want a normal size cock and stop talking about the size of it
and instead focus on the above points.
Oh, I get what that is.
I get what that is. I get what that is.
Is that the girl in the VR movie is like,
oh, your cock's so big!
And you're like,
thank you.
I want to imagine the
taboo relationships, and I want to
reimagine all this stuff, but
I can't imagine my penis being bigger.
I can't imagine that.
I just can't do that
excuse me
my name is VR Hentai
fat fat fat
you sound like you have something very
worthwhile to say
what do you have to say
yes
my feedback
I can't stand
when the POV actor is
touching the actress.
Ew. Ew.
Yuck.
You'll get germs that way.
Those are not
my hands.
They're moving and it's weird.
I hate it.
Total Immersion Breaker,
please stop. Total immersion breaker.
Immersion breaker.
I hate when the POV actor make any kind of noise.
It goes straight into my ears and makes me really uncomfortable.
It makes me really uncomfortable! I thought when I bought this headset it would make me actually fucking a girl in real life.
Why isn't that happening?
Is this what it's like?
Need... need... need close-up! More close-up!
You have reached the maximum close-up. I've seen most VRP video,
and sometimes I really wonder what they were thinking.
The girls are super far away.
It's boring as hell.
Far away from what?
From my ear noise.
I mean, other than this, it feels like they're only so far away they could be. From what? From my ear noise! Okay.
I mean, other than this,
it feels like they're only so far away they could be.
I think he just wants to, like, zoom in until, like, the camera goes through the mesh of the model
and you can see inside.
Oh.
This is what they mean when I'm inside them!
No clip mode.
It is so incredibly hot
when they come closer.
I want tits in my face.
Pussy stomach ass.
Ouch.
That, by the way, is written as
pussy stomach ass.
On one stage. stomach ass on one so many scene are completely wasted by
poor camera distance it's really
sad I don't care how okay the
camera distance is really sad I
mean it I mean I guess I've
never experienced any of this
VR porn so I'm sure you're right
I'm sure you're right these I'm sure you're right.
These problems are real.
They're not in your head.
When they come near you and talk in our ears.
Oh, God, we're collective now?
Are we Borg?
Yes.
Hello.
That's hot.
Borg-gasm.
Great.
That's going to be a thing, right?
It's like, let's put on our fuck goggles and orgasm at the same time
for peace and Bernie Sanders or whatever.
We are Borg. You will be ejaculated.
The great come in.
I am compenis of Borg.
Yeah, so there's so so much
so much in this document uh
34 pages uh thefbl.us
um I would uh highly recommend
going if we could go on forever
uh I would personally love to do
that I'd love this document thank you
very much for providing it uh but we
need to uh close on
this question
which I think
is the question we've all been wondering
is there any porn for women
finally
finally
we'll discover
define four
I know this is a bit of a shitpost on this thread,
but have not needed to look for women's POV porn before.
I'm going to do this from the top.
Here we go.
I know this is a bit of a shitpost on this thread,
but have not needed to look for women's POV porn before,
but lots more people asking me about VR because it's in the news.
Okay.
As always, men will ask
about porn and I will show them it, and
then the girls want to look, but engaging
it for them.
What kind of parties are you hosting?
The
actual girls that talk
to me about this. I mean,
it's just a regular...
I mean, well, okay, it starts out as a Tupperware party.
But then things get a little kooky.
Yeah, it's just like, you know, you have a dinner party,
and then the men retire to the garage for whiskey,
and somebody's like, hey, you want to see this new invention of mine?
What is it?
Because the last one was...
I know the last one was... I know the last one
was the fuck bike.
If anyone can help,
thanks a lot.
And then,
Adam, you are your
fan 73.
Yee, I would personally
not go for female
POV.
I remember at the start,
VRP also put out a scene with female POV and 90% complains of the users.
Why?
Simple 90% of the users are men.
Right.
Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute.
90% of the users are men.
Okay, that's fair enough.
But are you saying that somehow you've cultivated a consumer base wherein the existence of a thing,
the existence of a woman in a role that's been traditionally held by men would be like a problem?
Like people would fucking bitch about that?
Is there any precedent for that?
I know it's hard to imagine that in the tech industry in America.
I can't believe.
Why would an American company?
Not all virtual men, Lennon.
Oh, I love these.
You're ruining the franchise.
Is there any porn for women?
Most porn users are men.
Goodbye.
It's about ethics and porn journalism.
They need to wait
one week or more to get a scene, and
then a certain company puts out
a scene that is totally not
for them. They get a bit
irritated, lol.
Many told to stop their
subscription if it would
continue, and to be honest, women in porn, women are not visual as men are.
They get hot from emotion connection, etc.
Of course there are women who are visual.
Um, of course, of course.
Are you just arguing with the voices in your head?
You contradict yourself in the same paragraph.
Are you just arguing with the voices in your head?
You contradict yourself in the same paragraph.
In the end, we forget that it is always easier for a woman to get sex than the other way around.
Hooray! You've tapped into the Reddit collective! Congratulations!
It is not easier for a woman to get sex than it is to get rid of sex.
Women are always storing sex.
If you want to do women POV, I don't mind.
Just get ready for negative feedback. Well, now it might be calm because, hey, 90% of the users are male.
And a happy customer will not complain.
Lesbian would be better, I think, for women and men.
I think for women and men.
Yeah, you do. You're on Reddit. You think for both.
I think for one woman and all men.
Let me explain this to you.
and all men.
Let me explain this to you.
Actually, my two cents and experience from
the past on other sites
who put up woman POV?
That was not only a sentence, that was a paragraph.
It was neither.
In the future, I will not
be a problem when you got like
15 VR companies putting
two minus three vids each
week. Male will not
complain. No, they certainly won't!
There's no precedence for that!
Men never complain!
Why would a
man ever complain?
Listen, they're just complaining
now, so if you just wait
for a long
time, things will get better.
Men will correct the problems on their own.
They'll get it out of their system.
They always do.
Men are so emotionally intelligent.
But
at this moment, with only
four to five decent players
on the market, one seen each
week, you gotta choose one to
three companies to subscribe and
hope they put out something you like.
What did we learn
from this episode?
F plus.
I learned that some of the people online
spent upwards of $700
to just stick their dick
right in the uncanny valley.
Oh, at minimum.
Because so many of these posts are like... Well, okay. to just stick their dick right in the uncanny valley. Oh, at minimum. At minimum.
Because so many of these posts are like... It's Google Cardboard.
Well, okay, fair enough.
But these guys are spending...
I mean, they're talking about their experiences
arranging all of these different products.
But that's the thing.
So they're super consumers.
But so many of these posts are like,
oh, the dick doesn't look like mine,
and the guy's talking, and that's not my voice,
and my hands aren't moving with it.
And it's like, yeah, it's the uncanny valley effect, but you spit that much because you thought, I'll buy this headset, and I'll be able to fuck girls for life for free.
No, it doesn't work that way.
I experienced cognitive dissonance.
I experienced a cognitive dissonance, and that's your fault.
and that's your fault.
So, you know how you'd hear stories about in the 1900s where people would get together and watch a guy put himself in a barrel
and throw himself off of the Niagara Falls or whatever?
And I feel like that's what this is,
like an existential thing where you're just watching a guy
putting himself in a barrel, it's like, goodbye, humanity,
and just throws himself off a cliff, and we're like okay goodbye like it's just yeah this is a
dead end i feel like this is just like it's a social dead end you know to be like this involves
and and it's so addicting now that it's like you can just like fall into it you know what i mean
like why would you ever get out of it there's i mean
there's so many places this being uh one of them and an exciting new place but like there's so many
places on the internet where you can just like retire from the human experience of just like
you know you live to be 27 you stock the sheets you stock the shelves the best buy and then you're
like oh got enough for a Aviv! I'm out!
Yeah. Getting laid
that one time was too hard.
I think I'm just gonna... I'd rather
guarantee... Yeah, it's like...
I just...
We're getting to a point where you're
reading people talking about having
sex with these things on their
faces. It's like, either I...
Maybe I'm missing something maybe
this is just like a a uh a dildo for your brain you know like it's a it's a sex toy like any other
sex toy right well see you man i mean you imagine like you imagine because they've got they've got
they're wearing the oculus right they're wearing headphones they have some sort of like weird like
apparently very loud suctioning device on their
penis like there's probably a butt plug involved like their their whole masturbation there's a
butt yeah involved but like oh there are we just are we just like are we just shaming people for
using like a sex toy or is it or is it just as catastrophic as it looks?
So here's what it is.
This is the collision
of the internet
with
being a human being.
Okay.
So, disclaimer here. I own
a Vive. Yes, you do.
I pre-ordered it, and I spent way too
much money, and I have it, and
it's hilarious. And I fired up
this game called Hover Junkers, which
is like, oh, you fly
around on a stupid hover thing
and shoot pistols at things. It's actually kind of
fun. It's a shooter. Okay. Alright. But, there's
a lobby, and you sit in the lobby
while the, it's multiplayer only,
and you're sitting there waiting for the game to start, and there's
other players in the lobby with you.
Okay.
And everybody is represented by a floating headset
and their two controllers.
I've seen that.
The three objects that are tracked.
Okay, okay.
That's pretty good.
So I fired up the game, first game we're playing,
and within 15 seconds,
everybody's sitting in this lobby,
and there's immediately mimicry of sect acts.
Like somebody is making a jerk-off motion across the world at me,
and there's actually a guy making a jerk-off motion in real life in his living room
so that he can make a jerk-off motion in this
video game lobby with seven other
people. Right, right, right. It's pretty amazing.
There's a quick thing I want to mention.
Early on this episode
I was reminded of something. It was something that was submitted
to the podcast really
early on before we
accepted the full docs. It was just like a
web link. There wasn't content
for an episode, but the thing was called Cock Hero cock hero oh yes yes i do remember it and it was okay what
cock hero was it was a site that had videos uh of pornography put to music and then there'd be
like a beat meter at the bottom yeah that dictated how you're supposed to jerk off yeah there was
like a guitar hero like note chart. Yeah.
Stroke, stroke, stroke, stroke, stroke.
And then you had to win.
You had to win.
And to win this, you had to not ejaculate.
Oh, I remember that.
It was really hard to pull off the hammer-ons on your dick.
Also... You know what this makes me think of?
What this makes me think of is the
movie disclosure now if you guys don't know the movie disclosure in one scene michael douglas
goes into this weird virtual reality setup he puts on the headset and the hands and he's like
on a treadmill and he does all this stuff in this like really super cg 90s world pops up
okay and he does all this to open a file in, like, a file cabinet.
And the thing is,
you know, the thing you think is,
why didn't he just pull that up on a computer or just
open an actual file? Wouldn't that be
way easier and take less
effort? And I think with these
people, it's like, if these people doing this
had, like, one smidgen of
self-esteem and
the will to go outside,
I think them having sex with actual women
would be way less effort and money
spent than what they spend on this shit.
And if you're looking to have virtual
sex with Michael Douglas, you should go to
BOMB!
That's B-A-M-B
dot I-T. We have a
falling down module, we have
a basic instinct module.
I think there's
an Ant-Man module being worked on.
We have a
Behind the Candelabra DLC.
You probably read the game.
Oh, I tried to.
Michael Douglas.
Alright, thanks a lot.
Bye-bye.
Bye-bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye. The Uncondensed Version
So far I've fucked Gianna Michaels,
Cammy from Street Fighter,
and that girl with the big tits at the taco place I go to.
Oh god.
Oh god. Oh, God. Oh, God.
Your friend on the internet, this is Adam Bozarth.