The F Plus - 266: For No One's Consideration
Episode Date: November 12, 2017The Movie Ideas Wiki is (and this is going to come as a surprise) a wiki wherein people write and catalog ideas they have for movies. But (and this may come as an even bigger surprise) the ideas ...posted on that wiki are crap. So Boots was thinking "Hey, what if we read these crappy ideas out loud, would that be funny?" The answer may shock you! This week, The F Plus gets challenged to a Ponytail-Off.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Next time I record, I don't take too Benadryl, like, an hour before.
You can barely notice.
I'm proud of you, Boots. You're not unconscious.
Welcome to the F Plus Podcast.
Terrible movies described with exhaustive enthusiasm.
In the room tonight we've got Bunny Bread.
Banana and Kiwi is an upcoming movie in 2020.
It focuses on two birds who try to survive everyday life.
Their names are Shit Dick and Hambone.
Frank West.
Jeff the Killer kills an entire family movie Johnny Depp movie. John Toast
Misfahan
Background Portex
And Boots Reingear Background Portax. Now I'm far away.
And Boots Reingear.
Sideswipe pretends that he's a breakdancer when he dances to MC Hammer's You Can't Touch This.
The beginning of Megatron's redesign.
And the end.
Hail Frasier.
Hail Frasier. Hail Frasier.
Hey, F+. Hi, Lemons.
Hi, Boots.
I'm Boots. Yeah. Hey. Frank West. Hey, Frank West. Hi, Lemons. Hi, Boots. I'm Boots.
Yeah.
Hey!
Frank West?
Hi, Lemons.
I'm Boots.
No, sorry.
Okay.
Anyway.
Hey, F+.
Hey!
Hi, Lemons.
Hi, Boots.
Hi, Boots.
Do you guys like movies?
Do you guys like going to the movies?
No.
I love going to the movies.
Yes.
What's the most recent movie you saw?
The most recent movie I saw was
I believe Guardians of the Galaxy
Volume 2. Okay, well that's
a trendy and popular thing.
I saw Dunkirk, you pleb.
Do you guys remember when we did the
Fantendo episode?
Yes.
Yeah.
So that was a site where people would create their own video games, but without having
to make the video games.
Just talk about the video game, what it is, and that's all you need to do.
We got that for movies.
Yay.
Good.
Match made in heaven.
Yeah.
So Cheapskate was really kind enough to provide us 43 pages of the movie ideas wiki.
Okay.
Hour one.
Let's get started.
24 more terrible hours.
Yeah, 24 terrible hours of just this.
So thanks, Cheapskate.
Hey, Toast.
Yes?
I want you to tell me about the Fidget Spinner movie.
Well, I want to tell you.
My whole life has led up to this this is uh we're really trending
in the popular uh sort of sort of youth sphere you're trying to let me let me dab this onto
snapchat i think that's how this works all right yeah the fidget spinner movie rated pg parental
guidance adjusted uh and yes the fid, the fidget spinner movie.
It's an original movie idea created by Astro Nuex based on the fidget spinner toys.
Oh, those toys.
This wasn't created as a serious idea.
Oh, well, and get the fuck out of my office.
Yeah.
Why aren't your lips on my dick?
I guess that every day.
Okay.
Yeah, let's get the synopsis of this oh sure spinner land it's a an utopic city and the home world of the beings named spinners creatures that have the
power to spin and dash and each one is different from the another however the evil Lord Machine, alongside his evil robot spinner army and his clumsy sidekick Spike and Spoke, wants to conquer Spinner Land and mold it into his version of peace.
This is the plot to the early Sonic the Hedgehog cartoon.
Funny you should say that. After Blue Spinner's little sister, Cyan Spinner, was kidnapped by an evil
robot spinner, he assembles with
his friends, Red, Green,
Yellow, Purple, Pink, and Orange
Spinner, to save Cyan and
destroy Lord Machine Empire.
Are we sure this wasn't a Starburst movie?
No.
I thought it said
Fidget Spinner movie. It's an original
movie idea.
Wow.
It is.
This plot just goes on.
Jesus.
Yes, that was a synopsis.
And then there's a full detailed plot.
I don't know if we need to go through all of that or any of that.
Yeah, we do.
Well, let's start it.
Let's just see.
Okay. Let's see what sort of exciting narrative we get to start with and just leave the rest i would recommend you uh you stop your drink every time you hear the word spinner game for the
next few because you're gonna need a ride to the hospital if not those people those people are
already dead in memoriam me the movie begins with gold spinnerinner Watching the utopic Spinnerland from his helicopter
And then he hears
He herds, rather, a mysterious voice
And Gold asks who is talking
And that voice reveals to be the narrator of this film
Who introduces Spinnerland as a utopic city
In the homeworld of being named Spinners
Oh god, we're going back in time
Creatures that have the power to spin and dash
And each one is different from another
The narrator says that everything is happiness
in Spinnerland and all the spinners begin to sing a song
This is Spinnerland.
Have we established enough
that this place
that we are referring to is called
Spinnerland?
So where is the movie taking place?
The movie begins with Gold Spinnerland.
So after the musical's over Which I'm sure is amazing
All the spinners return to their activities
Then Gold flies in his helicopter
To the Gold Corporation Tower
His enterprise
Where he gets a baseball bat from a box
And tries to convince the narrator to reveal who he is
Oh, this is the Untouchables
So does he have arms?
Or does he fit them into one of the little ball bearing holes and spin it around?
That would be super dangerous.
So he tries to convince the narrator to reveal who he is?
So like he's speaking into the camera the whole time?
So the first third of the movie is like an extended fourth wall joke?
Yeah.
But obviously the narrator refuses.
Yes, he refuses.
He refuses to be threatened by the baseball bat.
Yeah.
That's Grant Morrison's Spinner movie.
Meanwhile, Blue is in house playing video games
until he is called by his parents.
They say they will travel to another city named... I don't know why I said spin there,
another city named Spinfield alongside Gold Spinner to get a package from the president,
Mr. Big Fidget.
They leave Blue's little sister, Cyan Spinner, on his charge.
You sure it isn't the Press Spin Dent?
Do that for me, Noah.
One of the towns they travel to should be named Spin City.
Yeah.
Meanwhile, Green Spinner went on his job on the restaurant known as Fish Gets.
All righty.
And he was attending Orange Spinner and Yellow Spinner that are boyfriends.
He was attending Orange Spinner and Yellow Spinner Academy?
No, he was serving them.
Oh, I see.
Okay.
Sorry.
He was about to serve them a chocolate milk glass.
Nope, no chocolate milk.
It's hard to keep it together.
It keeps on turning into a puddle.
Until he is called by his boss, Bruce Wadjet, who tells him that he is in
charge of the restaurant
until he is on a business
meeting in Spinfield, so Green goes
excited.
Sure. After Orange broke a lot
of glasses and dishes that were being carried by
a chef, Yellow breaks with him
after the chef forced her to pay, and
Orange ran outside of the restaurant crying.
And after that, forced her to pay, and Orange ran outside of the restaurant crying. And after that, Bruce manages to escape from the restaurant,
and then he wears a Batman helmet,
turning into the superhero known as Bat Spinner.
He runs to a dark alley where he finds a robotic evil spinner
attached to the walls with his pants out,
and suddenly Spider Spinner appeared.
The robot escaped and tried to destroy him,
however, Bat Spinner overloaded him,
and the extra cable exploded him into pieces.
And this is where the person writing this gave up They lost interest
Just about the time I did
It's like a Harry Potter, you know
Final movie deal where they split it into two movies
So you have to buy two movie tickets
To see the whole thing
Yeah
It says building page
Yeah, it's really keen of them to recognize that this is the last movie of the series.
Well, he stopped writing here because this is when his other movie pitch got picked up,
and that's where the Emoji Movie came from.
Yep.
Hey, Toast, I know there's a vast cast page there,
but could you let me know just about Lord Machine, the bad guy?
He's just about at the bottom of the page there.
I think we should get the whole cast on this one.
Well, maybe. I just, in particular, Lord Machine. I want to? He's just about at the bottom of the page there. I think we should get the whole cast on this one. Well, maybe. I just...
In particular, Lord Machine. I want to know about
that big bad villain. Well, I'm sure
after getting the licensing rights to Batman
and Spider-Man, there'll be plenty of money
left over for, you know,
kind of like C-list talent or
something like that. Yeah, true.
Well, Brian, I think what you're getting at is that
while Bat-Spinner...
While Will Arnett is playing Bat Spinner,
Will Ferret is playing Lord Machine.
Yeah.
No, I've heard of him.
Okay.
Also, yeah, who plays Spike?
Let's see.
Where?
Yeah, you're supposed to continue.
Second from the bottom.
Right after Will Ferret.
Andy Richter.
Andy Richter plays Spike.
No.
No.
What Andy Richter? What name is that? Oh, Andy Richter. Andy Richter plays Spiderman. No, no. What Andy Richter?
What name is that?
Oh, I'm sorry.
Andy Richer.
Yeah, any wealthier than.
It's me, Andy Richer.
Yeah, so in a movie where Chris Pratt plays Blue Spinner,
Ben Stiller is Red Spinner.
Of course.
Gray DeLise is pink spinner.
Tom Kenny is green spinner.
Tara Strong, yellow spinner.
Louis C.K. is orange spinner, naturally.
Isn't that the one that goes out crying?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
I think Louis C.K. just shouldn't have anything on the script,
and he should just be able to fill in whatever he wants for that scene.
Morgan Freeman as Gray Spinner and the narrator.
Way to give it away.
Jesus.
I was really looking forward to that one.
I even watch the movie now.
It's spoiled.
For the craftsmanship.
All right.
Next up, Frank West.
That's me.
So this movie is the next 10 pages of the document.
Oh, it is.
I'm going to go get something to eat.
Have fun, Frank West.
I'm going to quit the podcast.
So feel free to edit this a bit.
No. All right. H'm gonna quit the podcast. So feel free to edit this a bit. Uh, no.
Alright, hunker down, everyone.
The Simpsons vs.
SpongeBob SquarePants is a movie
created by PhillyDan25
and produced by Spectrumite
Entertainment. It is an action
cartoon movie where the characters of the
two popular American cartoons go to
war. All the voice actors will remain the same as the ones in the regular shows
and the synopsis i don't know why you say it's so long the synopsis is nice and short bikini
bottom turns up to be in chaos after many things from above came down the crusty crab gets a letter
saying that some people from the land are destroying their life. The Simpsons characters.
The SpongeBob characters come up from the ocean to get revenge for what Springfield has done.
And now we'll just move on to the next section, which I'm sure is very...
Wow, nope, that is...
That is a lot.
Boots wasn't kidding about ten pages.
No.
No, he's not.
I wonder if there's anything...
No?
It's all pretty much...
They pretty much just wrote the story.
I could just read, like, every...
fifth paragraph,
and this would still be the rest of the episode.
The movie starts...
Yeah, just find random sentences,
because they all look kind of amazing.
This movie is very violent.
Patrick, ignoring the chaotic
situation, runs up as fast
as he can go, which is not that fast,
and he fires his AK-47
without reloading.
Sounds like Spongebob.
It's Patrick, idiot.
It's not Spongebob. Spongebob would never use an AK-47.
He prefers pistols.
Yeah, it sounds like his phone.
It's more of an AWOP guy.
Someone in a chopper
drops, comes down a ladder, and throws
a grenade in Patrick's mouth.
Patrick quickly gets it out and throws
it back into a jet, destroying
and killing a shooter. However, the jet
above is about to fall on him, so he dives
back into the shelter.
Yada, yada, yada.
There's a note, and Spongebob opens
it up. Not dear
Bikini Bottom. You guys
suck. You are corrupt and
freaking terrible. You are shit.
Go freak yourself and come
back when you have a good city.
Ernst and Sealy.
Because they can say shit, but not fuck.
They're like, why You just misspelled fuck
I mean
Yada yada yada
Wow
Meanwhile at the quickie mart
Apu
I'm pretty sure he spelled it wrong
Nahasapim Petalon
Was getting robbed by Snake a criminal
Put your hands up bitch he yells
Sounds like Simpsons I mean that's that quality Sim Was getting robbed by Snake, a criminal. Put your hands up, bitch, he yells. Sounds like Simpsons.
I mean, that's that quality Simpsons writing.
It's real on character.
With Apu having one hand up and taking out money with the other.
Before he takes the money out, though, he hears gunshots, and it's not from Snake.
Hold on, dangerous criminal, Apu shrieks, and as he runs out...
Oh yeah, dude, self-serve cash register.
And who the fuck is Jamshed?
It's who the frick.
Sorry, who the frick is Jamshed?
It cuts to Apu outside who is witnessing Jet shooting miniguns all over the place,
I guess just randomly.
Little Jamshed, he yells, get the shotguns.
Jamshed is one of, oh, Jamshed is one of Apu's octuplets.
I've waited for this day.
Didn't you use them when I needed you to get the fire out of Mr. Homer's house?
Stop referencing episodes, father.
Oh, so it's got comedy, too.
Yes, it does have, I mean.
That's gotta be gut-bustingly hilarious.
I mean, I'm.
I took a Family Guy sketch and made it a whole movie.
Let's see.
Let's search for...
Gun.
That's what I do.
Oh, boy.
Meanwhile, Mr. Krabs is chasing after the Springfield Bank,
trying to get the loot while everyone is distracted.
He ejects out of his copter and parachutes onto the roof.
The chopper lands on a platform next to the building,
and Krabs uses his nose to cut the roof.
He goes in and lands on the side.
The place seems to be empty,
so Krabs goes forward with his plan and sneaks towards the cameras,
but when he gets to the safes,
Krusty is seen there with a gun.
Go away, Fan K.
Oh, wait, you're an old man.
You ripped your restaurant's name after me.
And then it
shows Moe, he's at the tavern, and...
Let's just go to the finale.
Let's get the grand finale.
The duo goes out.
The duo then goes out and grapples onto one of the choppers
and begins to open the hatch. However,
in a turn of events, there is no one there.
Hmm, this is weird, Barret says
as he goes to hijack it. However,
when he dives into it, Danny Phantom
appears as he gets
blasted out of the chopper and
falls to the ground. Soon, Bart hits the
ground and becomes unconscious.
SpongeBob then parachutes down to save him,
but Danny appears again as SpongeBob
blasts back onto the chopper.
Danny, Tucker, Madeline, Jazz,
and a few other characters appear around him as they go in slowly and Danny goes aboveper. Danny, Tucker, Madeline, Jazz, and a few other characters appear around him
as they go in slowly and Danny
goes above Bart. However, Vlad
appears on top of one of the houses across the street
as he goes to blast Danny.
Holy crap, every character
from The Simpsons and Spongebob Squarepants
yell in unison as the movie ends.
Yeah. Yeah.
Now that's how you end a movie.
By introducing more characters
yeah
and the next section
is deleted scenes
none
every scene that's ever been made is in this movie
however it appears we did miss the premiere
which was July 21st 2017
shit uh can we get some fun trivia about this movie first i'd like to add there's a review
section feel free to leave your reviews for this movie below and he's hopefully left three blank
bullet points as well as your signature i wonder if i can edit this. I have some fun trivia.
The part where Mr. Burns says,
Who?
To when Homer keeps saying Homer Simpson is a reference to the Simpsons episodes
Who Shot Mr. Burns Part 1
and Who Shot Mr. Burns Part 2.
Apu referenced the episode
Homer the Heretic
when he said that Jamshed
got to use the shotgun.
According to wordcounter.net,
the plot is 3,981 words,
21,972 characters,
226 sentences,
36 paragraphs,
9-slash-10th-grade reading level,
14 minutes, 29 seconds reading time,
22 minutes, 7 seconds speaking time.
Bart is used more than any other word. The 9th and 10th grade reading time, 22 minutes, 7 seconds speaking time. Bart is used more than any other word.
A 9th or 10th grade reading
level. About a 3rd
or 4th grade writing level.
Hey, buddy Brad.
Whoa, no, yeah, okay.
Oh.
Yeah, yeah. This is my life.
Yeah.
What are your thoughts on exciting adventure movies for children?
Oh, shit, yeah.
I'm all about it.
You were listening for the past ten minutes, weren't you?
I loved it.
Oh, yes.
Yes, while we're getting more.
Is this the sequel to Spongebob vs. the Simpsons?
You're getting Purgatory.
That sounds about right.
Yeah, okay.
Yeah, it's the third Jumanji movie.
Oh, good. Yeah, okay. Yeah, it's the third Jumanji movie. Oh, good.
Yay.
Not much Spongebob in here, I imagine.
I hope there's guns.
I do hope there's at least a few.
All right.
I'm still hoping the Bart shows up more than any other word.
Purgatory!
Jumanji adaptation!
Oh, excuse me, adaption Adaptation excuse me Adaption
Adaption
alright
that's how you shun the Adaptation
Purgatory is the third movie
after Jumanji and Zathura
it will come out in December 2092
mark your calendars
that's a bit of a wait
a little bit of a problem
also writing
before I die, my
grandchildren, I have one last request.
At this date, you must
release this movie.
Part of a bet.
Don't ask. It's on the movie
ideas wiki. I'm sure you've
copied it.
It is scheduled to air
worldwide in all
cinema around the world.
It is a fantasy horror adventure film.
The film is shot in New York and West Virginia.
Excuse me, and West Virgina, Pennsylvania.
Oh, that's my favorite Pennsylvanian town.
One of the best.
The story centers on a young boy,
Alan Walker,
who discovers an ancient board game in an antique store upon playing with his friends.
Period.
The game begins to cause a series of chaos events.
The gang resolve to finish the game
in order to reverse all of the destruction it has caused.
Synopsis.
In 1987,
a young man with a long coat
seems to be rushing to a medieval hall.
This is quite the synopsis.
He tries to open the door, but it is locked.
But is locked.
He is locked. He then kicks open the door.
The door opened.
And he saw a blonde girl
dress.
Dressed in a blonde girl dress dressed in a blonde girl would you fuck me i'd fuck me the door opened and he saw a blonde girl dress in white standing in the middle of
the hall and three other corpses lying around she stood still despite seeing the door open. A giant skeleton wing
creature descends from the ceiling
and surrounds her. The woman's
last word to the young man,
Walker! Also Texas and Ranger!
Then the woman is killed
by the monster along with other three.
The timeline
move to modern era.
Noah Winchester, and that seems
very, very modern, a teenager
come from a poor family.
He always get bully at the school
by the rich kid, Dante Vansing,
with his two friend.
Dante Vansing
with his two friend, period,
and space bar. Jennifer
Constantine, who's secretly in love with
Noah, always conform him after he getting pick on.
However, Noah feels shame and thinks Jennifer pity on his weakness.
There's like a caveman cadence to this.
Oh, I have to now.
He then wandered off street after a huge fight with Jennifer.
Lighten the caveman just a little bit.
Can we just turn that caveman dial
down from a nine to like a six and a half?
Okay, alright, alright.
At same time, a student president
of Virginia, Vergana
High School, Lucy Spellman,
walking back to class.
Someone turn the cookie monster knob up a couple times.
Fuck! It's more of an
art than a science, damn it.
Yeah, you're right.
Walking back to class, and Dante come flirt on her.
Lucy give...
Ew, ew, get it off, get it off, ew.
I came flirts everywhere, just all over the room.
Lucy give cold shoulder to Dante and went back to her class.
As Noah wander, he hear a scream, and he went into
the source of the scream. Went into
the source of the scream. Probably her throat.
Into somebody's mouth.
It's an antique store
whose owner is an elderly woman.
The woman asked
what Noah want.
He found a old board game
and stole it home from the shop.
Upon leaving, he run into a Sarah Walker,
one of the many Sarah Walkers,
who was going to the antique shop.
Sarah then noticed something strange and started chasing Noah.
Noah ran and ditched Sarah and went back home.
As Noah went home, he locked himself inside of the room and ignored his parent.
He has the one.
He doesn't need to.
He give a call to Jennifer and apologized to her for being rude.
While on the phone, he invite her over to check out the game.
Jennifer declined.
But saved it.
We got some real good plot progression happening now.
Nah, fuck this.
I think we should skip ahead to Sarah Then Explain.
Sarah Then Explain where? Where is Sarah should skip ahead to Sarah Then Explain. Sarah Then Explain where?
Where is Sarah Explain?
Oh, Sarah Then Explain.
Sarah Then Explain.
This is a board game.
Sarah Then Explain.
This is a board game that link a dimension where foul and nasty monster and ghost live.
They have to survive and win the game.
She is the 44th walker, and her duty is to
safeguard the board game from the world.
See? That's why she was called
a Sarah Walker. I understand now.
It makes sense. I didn't vote for her.
I feel like an asshole.
The fourth roll by Lucy.
Period.
He has a crooked cat. He live in
crooked house. He walk a crooked
mile. He found out crooked sixpences.
A crooked man appears.
As if by shitty writing.
He grabbed the board game and run.
I just like that the monster's move is just,
yoink, see ya, sucka.
Oh, grab the board game and run.
In the process, Sarah is injured.
She review that they have to get the board game and run in the process sarah is injured she review that they have to get the board
game back the fourth role is always the crooked man he has the ability to break a seal beat the
shit out of seal if the game is not continuing every hour come on let's all beat the shit out
of seal for all this writing pop songs they then found Man in the hotel, but it was too late.
He has Break 2 seals already.
Oh, no.
But we're never gonna survive!
The first release of Predator, Egg.
Sure.
Why not?
You are one ugly motherfucker.
Baby cry when they are hungry, sad, want attention, afraid, or sometime bloodlust.
Wait, when babies are bloodlust?
Yes.
Yeah.
You're following.
Jonathan seems to be pretty upset.
Yeah, he just wants to tarot a jugular.
It'll pass.
The second seal, which was kissed from a rose, bring out the deceased soul.
Do you miss someone who passed?
Do you have a chances to say goodbye?
Now you have a chances.
Sarah meet her ex-boyfriend
who get killed in the previous game again.
That would have made sense, maybe.
She later gets saved by the
four of them. They steal back in the
board game in the confusion.
Crooked Man command the zombie and ghost and alien to chase of them. They steal back in the board game in the confusion. Crooked Man command the zombie and
ghost and alien to chase after
them. They hide
and continue the game.
They then release,
In a memorable moment to escape death,
hold on, let me take a selfie.
Smiley only
appear in the selfie photo.
Along the process, Candyman
and the Robbie Killer Rabbit.
Kidding.
I'm following all this.
I don't know about you guys.
Yeah, we're stupid.
And the Robbie Killer Rabbit is released as well.
They release one calamity after another.
Among them are El Silbon, Ghost Polio Children, Mrs. Shadow, and Gas Mask.
I think it was somewhere around this point that they had to ask the orderly for more loose leaf paper.
So, is the gas mask the product placement in this movie?
And Gas Mask.
On the 21 roll by Noah.
Tell me where to go next.
Upon Losing Sarah, I think, the last two paragraphs.
Upon losing Sarah, the old granny, 43rd Walker,
appear and gear them up with exorcism weapon.
Noah gets a crossbow.
Lucy get a magic cross pendant.
Jennifer gets a magic wand.
Dante gets a shield and sword.
Old granny carried the gun.
You can't
use medieval weapons. Granny's packing
heat. This is just full life consequences
at this point. Hey, buddy Brad, I want you to
This just kind of gets a fucking necklace?
Jesus. The writing is actually
getting worse and worse as it goes on.
I actually want you to rewind a little bit
here. I pasted it into our chat.
I want to revisit this as well. I pasted it into our chat. I want to revisit this as well.
Yeah, I pasted it into this chat just a little bit that we skipped because I think it's worth reading.
Oh, in the chat.
I'm sorry.
A monster with tail wearing lipstick, period.
He almost killed most of them, but they escape.
The 23rd rule is backpack.
Oh, no.
Dante has a ghost sit on his shoulder, making him heavy to run away.
Crooked Man arrive at the scene.
He then retrieved the board game and run away again.
Oh, that scamp.
He's always doing that.
He does.
That's his thing.
I think we would have learned by now.
Okay, so they all go off to the New York Tower.
Crooked Man has released three calamity in his last three hours.
First is the human forest period then the weeping angel period the last seal its release is jabberwocky which appear at
the beginning of the show it's just a prayer sorry bob and dave they then fight off the monster
on the way up they lost granny and lucy stay back to fend off the zombie and ghost.
Three of them then try to retrieve the board game.
In the confusion and struggle, Noah throw out the dice.
It released the escape light.
The game end.
Yay!
Good.
We won.
And light blast down and every ghost and zombie blast back into the board game.
Crooked Man tries to grab Jennifer in the process, but his hand is cut off by Dante.
Everything went back to normal.
Sarah's soul also comes back to her body.
That's nice.
The board game has returned to Walker family.
Four of the players went back to their usual life bonding closely.
20 years later.
This would be like 2112.
Yeah.
All right.
Well, the movie came out in 2092, or will come out, but it's set in 1987.
Oh, I forgot.
Okay.
So it's like a real, like, it's like watching a movie now.
It's a period piece.
So this would be 2007.
This is probably what people in 2092 will think when they see our movies now.
They'll be like, that's about what they were like, right?
This is a documentary, right?
Okay.
I mean, this is basically that era's Downton Abbey, really, when you think about it.
20 years later, in 2007, a teenager comes into the antique store, and now Sarah, an old man, sits at the counter and asks what the kid wants.
Sarah's an old man now.
That's what happens to Sarahs when they get old.
The same question asks by the granny.
Period.
That's the end?
Question mark?
Question mark?
Now, I think we're about to move on, but I really want to know, Bunnybread, can you tell me?
I mean, we know these characters so well.
Who's playing Dante?
Oh, yeah, well, of course.
Unknown actor.
Ah, okay.
Wow, unknown actor has several roles in this movie.
Who else you got?
Well, who's playing Sarah?
You know, that's just such a strong role.
I think we all have someone in mind.
Right, right.
Unknown actor.
Okay.
Am I sure about that?
Oh, wait.
Was there a Sarah?
I'm sorry.
I just skipped past all of it.
Unknown actress.
So I guess it's like
Eddie Murphy
and the Nutty Professor
kind of thing.
I thought it was going to be
a one-person play.
It's just...
Oh, yeah.
I can see that being
a one-man show.
That would really work.
It makes sense.
Hey, Isfahan.
Hi.
Do you like completely original ideas?
No, I hate them.
Good.
So you got a completely unoriginal idea for me, I hope.
I'm pretty sure I do.
Awesome.
Take this one.
Okay.
Never Say No.
Take this one.
Okay.
Never Say No.
Never Say No is a spy movie that features CIA agent Leo Redlodge and his partner Hobbs,
a man who uses holograms to make his face look like a tiger.
Which is, of course, the most efficient way to make your face look like a tiger.
Hey, man, it's like a mask.
Do you want a mask? No makeup, no no makeup no nothing really holograms huh okay
my movie poster is a red gradient
shit i spilled some red wine on this table
the synopsis a secret agent must stop a mad scientist who's auctioning off a nuclear bomb.
Wait.
Before you continue, click on the poster and read all the text that it shows on it.
All right.
So from the top we have Leo Stalis.
L-E-O-S-T-A-L-E-S.
And we have the wine stain.
And then we have
Never Say No in all capitals.
America's James Bond.
Directed by Leo Staless.
Leo Staless, whatever.
Starring Tom Cruise, Daisy Ridley,
and Patrick Stewart.
Coming soon.
Oh wait.
Come one-ng soon.
PosterMyWall.com.
Want the plot?
Yeah.
Let's get the plot.
Get on the edge of your seat.
Leo Redlodge is a CIA agent.
He's walking to, get this, the office.
Actually, a top-secret bunker underneath the U.S. Capitol.
Because if there's one place you want to put a bunker,
it's where a bunch of people constantly are coming and going and have cameras pointed at.
He meets Donald Trump there for a mission briefing.
He then realizes Trump is a walking bomb and tries to get out.
Yeah, me too.
Trump, who is drugged, tries to stop him.
But Red Lodge escapes with half a second to spare.
Cue theme music!
Thank you.
I made a deal with God.
It's like, I made a deal with God over, like, the James Bond intro.
Like, all the weird visuals.
Red Lodge is facing a hearing on the death of the president.
He is then commissioned into leading an investigation of it.
He and his on-off girlfriend and police detective, Kate,
figure out he was drugged and had a bomb surgically implanted in his rib bone.
A rib bone?
It's a marrow
bomb.
And was drugged so he
no only wouldn't notice, but that
he'd position himself so that Red Lodge
would either die in the explosion or be charged
with assassination, either or.
He then hears
of a small robbery at a computer store,
which exists.
Which is, when the president just exploded, that's really the most important thing.
Oh my gosh, somebody's knocking over our fries, we gotta go.
Well yes, this is clearly the job for the CIA.
Yeah.
He sees a familiar face on the TV screen, He then decides to check it out on instinct.
He and his partner,
Hobbs, if that is his real name,
head there in their tricked-out tour buses,
Aster and Martin.
Wait, they both have their own tour bus?
Yeah.
I don't think this guy knows what the CIA is.
They're really fat.
Actually, if you think about this,
a chase scene involving at least two tour buses
and some other vehicles sounds amazing.
It does sound really good.
I just feel like it wouldn't last very long.
I'm picturing maybe rat-thin tricked-out tour buses
where there's exhaust pipes coming out the side and everything.
And for some reason,
there are really big tires on the back of the tour bus.
It's got the dual
stripes running down like the the front windshield of the uh oh yeah and like the the the like the
engine chunk sticking out of it that's great yeah bug catchers they find out nothing important was
stolen hobbs says it's just some normal robbery but red lodge wonders why the twice as valuable
gigaplex computer wasn't stolen
instead of a piece of unimportant
hardware. He is then almost
stabbed in the back by a young man
linked that goes nowhere to
owns the place. He shoots the man
in the hand with his laser beam glasses,
which I'm pretty sure I mentioned
before, and finds out he has the same
name as him.
Suddenly, the scare quote intern...
We met at the YMCA.
Bushy runs out in a flash,
figuring that he's up to no good.
Red Lodge grabs something out from under his tour bus
that folds out into a motorcycle.
It's an Ikea motorcycle.
He then chases after Bushy,
who is also using a motorcycle.
Damn it!
It's a motorcycle. He then folds the motorcycle Bushy, who is also using a motorcycle. Damn it! It's a motorcycle.
He then folds the motorcycle into a something.
Yeah.
The chase is long, but Bushy is just about to head into a garage.
So that's like 20 minutes right there of the movie.
But Bushy is just about to head into a garage that will buy him time until he nearly runs into Astor,
which Red Lodge has been remote controlling the whole chase. Bushy is then arrested.
Bushy
is then interrogated, but says nothing
save for, the doctor will have
your hides for this.
The scene shifts to Red Lodge drinking at a
bar. He then gets a notification from
his mysterious mission briefer, B.
He then goes to the restroom,
which has a secret entrance to an agent base.
It's convenient.
He was drinking in the same bar that has a secret entrance to an agent base.
Insert identification into glory hole.
I think it's this.
I'll stay here just in case.
No, it isn't, but I'll just give it a moment.
Yeah.
He is then briefed by B
that terrorists are planning on stealing
a nuclear missile from North Korea
and that he has to steal it before they do.
He then gets his gadgets
from Grease Monkey.
So we're halfway through the movie
before the Q sequence.
Red Lodge tries to steal the missile.
We're not halfway through the movie.
Oh.
Okay, so what happens is that the terrorists
are going to be auctioning this nuke off
to different nations.
So that's fun. Skip down
to the auction is on a yacht.
I was just looking at that paragraph. Okay.
The auction is on a yacht in the
middle of the Pacific. The bidders are from
Russia, North Korea, China,
ISIS, the Black Hand, the Apparatus, the Mafia, the Yakuza, the Magia, Quantum, Spectre, and more.
The Burger King Kids Club.
And featuring helicopter rides.
The bidding goes on for a while until suddenly everyone in their chairs except for Red Lodge is electrocuted.
General Hammer, who is conducting the chairs except for Red Lodge is electrocuted.
General Hammer,
who is conducting the bidding, tells Red Lodge, can't touch this.
No, he tells him, let's skip this place and
meet the doctor. That's in title case, so
I guess it's like the
single? It's the name of the song.
It's a musical. He sings the song.
Let's skip this place and meet the doctor.
If it's the
last thing we ever do.
They then feed
all the other bitters to the pet sharks
in the swimming pool.
I mean, they were hungry.
It was feeding time.
What are you...
Hey man, I know I've captured you, but do you want to help me
with these corpses?
Is it at that point actually called the swimming pool?
Yeah.
The chumming pool.
Red Lodge then knocks Hammer out
and covers him with alcohol.
He then frees Kalen
and they plan to go to the Doctor's
Island hideout in Jamaica and grab
the nuke there. Red Lodge
is already disguised.
Kalen is Hammer's granddaughter, which should gain
her access, and Hammer seems to be
unconscious after drinking.
Sure.
They go to meet the Doctor,
a man named Heinrich Heimlich.
You won't outmaneuver
me this time, Heimlich.
He greets him, and then Red Lodge
shoots him in the head. The guards don't attack
since Creepy Guy on the Street, who Red Lodge shoots him in the head. The guards don't attack since creepy guy on the street,
who Red Lodge is impersonating, was the superior of the doctors.
My voice is getting sore.
Suddenly, Bushy arrives, saying that Red Lodge is an imposter,
and then he and Kalen are captured.
He then reveals himself to be the doctor
and unmasks himself to reveal his true identity.
Doctor No!
Oh, I wonder where they got that reference from.
All of our profits, for some reason,
had to go to United Artists.
I don't know.
He then says that Red Lodge...
We had to get it to get
America's James Bond as our tagline,
so at that point, we had the license.
We have America's James Bond,
but we still have James Bond's villains.
Yeah.
He then says that...
Literally, America's like...
Baby steps, you know.
He then says that Red Lodge has brains and nerve and offers him a hundred million dollars to join
his organization, the Black Hand. Red Lodge refuses, of course. No. Then puts him and
Kalen in a sauna room that slowly dehydrates whoever is in it. Because if there's one thing
that isn't in a sauna room, it's moisture.
Words are difficult for this person, aside from most.
Yeah.
Most. Red Lodge then takes
a flash freeze pellet from his glasses
temple lip. He freezes up all the
healing pour, oh I'm sorry, the
heating pours in the room and the two
escape. He then
knocks out a guard and finds out that No
is going to fire the missile at Washington D.C.
He dresses as the guard and locks the missile in place.
He then ambushes Noh nearby some boiling water.
The two fight and Noh appears to die inside the boiling water.
What is the boiling water?
Why is this guy, like, providing details on the boring stuff and then glossing over the actual...
How things actually work out in the action scenes.
Yeah, it was...
Exactly the same
joke I was going for.
I would have said lasagna.
Pass off!
Lasagna's funnier.
Checkmate toast.
That's true.
Okay, boiling water.
General Hammer appears in the two fight
But just as Red Lodge gets the upper hand
Noe emerges from the tank and knocks him out
How did he survive the boiling water?
Fuck you
I guess it was just regular water and no one checked
Oh, it was just sparkling water, damn
Somebody was just blowing bubbles underneath there
Somebody was farting in the tub
Noe and Hammer realize the place is going to blow
And leave with a bunch of
henchmen in their large jet.
Red Lodge and Kalen jump on it as it
takes off, and no exits the plane
to kill them. Red Lodge and him struggle,
but he is knocked down and gets caught in
jet intake. Once again,
his robotic hands prove to be his weakness, as he
can't grab a thing with them to stop himself.
Hammer and a bunch of henchmen come
out, but Red Lodge shoots them.
Hammer then knocks out Kalen.
Shoots them while he's in the jet intake?
Yeah.
Okay.
Well, no.
No is the one who gets caught in the jet intake.
Okay.
Depending on your interpretation of how subject-object-verb goes, but sure.
interpretation of how subject-object verb goes, but sure.
Rachel shoots some hammer, then knocks out
Kalen and puts her in the plane.
Leo, just going in and out
of the plane seems really easy for
people while the plane is in flight.
Leo then shoots the pilot,
causing the plane to barrel roll.
Hammer falls off, but Red Lodge
stays on thanks to magnets in his shoes.
Yeah, yeah.
He then heads inside the plane and takes Put It On autopilot.
The world is safe, and another mission of his is successful.
He and Kalen then decide to vacation in Hawaii.
End credits, the end.
A Where Is The Knife Film, copyright 2018.
That's a great production company name.
A Where Is The Knife Film. 2018. That's a great production company name. Oh, where's the knife film?
This one has Donald
Trump cast as himself.
We just need you to blow up.
That's his special thing. Will people be paying
attention to me? Well, most of the time he plays
Mike Barron.
Eddie Circus is B.
Better to come back, there's Dr. No.
There's a pretty good exchange
between Bushy and Leo Redlodge there
in the quotes.
Okay, I see it.
The doctor will have your hides for this.
The doctor...
Did he say it?
He cut out Bunny Bread.
Bunny Bread died.
The doctor will have your hides for this.
That's the line that says that.
This is going well.
All right.
Take two.
One more time?
I've done this three times.
I don't know if I have the emotions for this.
The doctor will have your hides for this.
Am I bushy or not?
You're not bushy.
Good.
Good, good, good, good.
All right, anywho, you go bushy.
Speed.
All right.
The doctor will have your hides for this.
I did it better.
Tell us his name.
God damn it.
No.
We're getting nowhere with this guy.
Ba-da-da-da-da-da. What? Ba-da-da-da-da. this guy that was worth it
it was spectacular
thank god I was involved
we worked through it team
we did it
I want to tell you about a movie
a movie I came up with
I'm GuitarGuy96
and this this movie is called I came up with. I'm GuitarGuy96.
And this movie is called Starseeds.
You will believe in aliens.
That's a pretty commanding move.
Or I'll never let you out of my face. Yeah. Synopsis after being abducted by aliens a man with extra extraordinary abilities and his
two cohorts must defend the earth from an invasion that could wipe out the entire human race
plot the film begins at a farm the farmer was sleeping until he heard mowing sounds coming from his cornfield,
so he grabbed his rifle and went out to find the source of the sound.
When he walked through the field, he comes face-to-face with a humanoid lizard.
The farmer shoots, but it survives.
Thanks, Vortex.
Background, Vortex likes this movie.
He tried to outrun the creature, but it captured him,
and they were both sucked into a cloud,
which is really a UFO in disguise,
before it took off into space, leaving behind a crop circle.
On Earth, Orion Johnston is a man who lives a lame life he's a pizza delivery man who lives with his
mother martha in manhattan online he is known only as guitar god 96
martha has been trying to move on with her okay that is what that says all right martha has been
trying to move on with her ever since her husband left.
Every time Orion brings up his father, Martha would silence him and tell him not to mention anything about his father.
Silence!
The silence expels upon you.
You think there might be a little bit of Guitar God 96 in this?
Just a little autobiographical.
Okay.
That night, a group of gray aliens watch over earth looking for humans
to abduct when they find orion they witnessed an anomaly in his nervous system so they flew down
to earth activated the ship's cloud disguise and abducted orion see what i would do is i would
activate the cloud disguise before flying down to earth hey Hey, is that an alien? Well, no, it just turned into a cloud.
I guess it looks like it's a cloud now,
but why is it only 30 feet off the ground?
Why are people being taken into it?
Yeah.
Yeah, all right.
Well, it's a cloud.
You know, you can't question clouds.
Yeah, I think there's a lot of people in Manhattan.
Another cloud grabs someone with his cloud claws again.
I tell you, the weather these days.
Cloud abductions, man.
A reptilian commander orders the greys possessive
to take him to the reptilian planet Alpha Draconis,
where he is sent to a dungeon.
Pleiadian prisoner.
Love interest.
Commander, the ruler
of Hera and his wife Athena.
His baby
says goodbye to his wife
and baby Orion.
Can you just read off the names that are happening
here? Like Samy Jassi
and Zorgon. Oh, he meets his father
in space.
Speaking of Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2.
Yeah, Vrillon the Galaxy Volume 2. Yeah,
Vrillon.
Vrillon.
And it goes to
Arrow for Pleiadian
training.
Anyway,
when the Galactic Command
struggled to find
Drago's location,
Zorgon tells everyone
where he's hiding.
I think we're
a Power Rangers
crossover now.
Yeah.
He's on Earth, where he is disguised as Benjamin Harrison,
the President of the United States.
He's going to put a transmitter on top of the Washington Monument,
and when it signals, his armada will invade Earth.
Killing humans and enslaving survivors thus become
the dominant species of Earth.
The tallest point in North America.
The Washington Monument.
Right.
So,
Ashtar called all star
people of the galaxy to come together
to fight Drago and defend the humans.
Orion sent
a broadcasting message
to all Americans, possessive,
telling them that their president
is an reptilian
and they must return to their homes
and they will fight them.
When Orion, Semjase, and Zorgon
confront Drago,
he shapeshifts into his true reptilian form,
captures the team, and restraints them.
Once the transmitter beamed up,
the reptilian arrived,
and all Pleiadians, Syrians, Arcturians,
Andromedans, and Greys on Earth start the battle.
The reptilian have a regenerative healing factor.
They roll a d8.
I didn't say that.
After a short rest.
And their heads can't
heal. And only their heads
can't heal.
Vrillon attempted
to decapitate Drago until
he grabbed him is going to use
an electric spear to kill him.
But when Orion ejected from his ship to attack Drago,
he impaled him with his spear, presumably killing Orion.
Just as was about to finish Vrilon,
Orion grabbed Drago and him away from his father.
Drago asks how Orion's still alive,
and he shapeshifts into Zorgon
revealing that he was a disguise
he was a disguise
when the two
Reptoids fought
the real Orion came to rescue Vrillon
and then Zorgon finishes Drago
by decapitating him with his spear
which is a very hard thing to do
with a spear
it takes a while no he didn't decapitating him with his spear, which is a very hard thing to do with a spear.
Decapitate him.
It takes a while.
Sorry, yes, all right.
No, he didn't decapitate him.
He decapitated him.
With his decap-tits.
Yeah.
That's real easy to do with a spear.
When the captain of the mothership alerts all the surviving reptilians,
who are different from the reptoids, apparently,
they retreated, ending the war
once and for all.
One month after the war,
Zorgon became the new king
of Alpha Dragon Us.
And Orion
is awarded the Pleiadian Medal of
Honor, along with Sam Jassy.
Zorgon,
you guys are following this, right?
Yeah.
Great.
This is like the sci-fi Silmarillion.
There's so many names.
Zorgon's the one who, you know,
it's shapeshifted some...
Decaptits.
Yeah.
That's what I'm taking away from this.
Good.
Zorgon requested Ashtar to sign a peace
treaty and end their conflicts and start a relationship and when he signed it their
relationship began makes sense consent is a big part of this it's good it's good
orion and semchase have started a relationship of their own, and the movie ends with millions of stars brightening the sky
in honor of the Pleiadians' new beginning.
I now believe in aliens.
Yeah, makes a compelling case.
Yep.
So we got Lucas Till as Orion, Cara Delevingne as Sam Jassy,
Vin Diesel as Zorgon,
Chris Hemsworth as Lord Ashtar,
Emilia Clarke as Lady Athena,
Josh Brolin as King Drago,
and Sean Bean as Rillin.
Even in fake movies, Sean Bean can't stay alive.
Also, Pierce Brosnan's a character that I don't think we even mentioned at all.
That doesn't get mentioned in the synopsis.
Let's see.
Nope.
It's okay.
But you go to Pata who has his own page on this wiki.
He's the father of Samjase, Yukata, and Pleja.
Pata is one of the commanders of the Galase, Yukata, and Plejah. P'tah is one of the commanders
of the Galactic Command on
Planet Era.
And I'm pretty sure it's also a Klingon
word, so there's that.
You're thinking of Kapla.
No, I'm...
P'tah. There are other Klingon
words, Boots. No, I'm
not.
I challenge you to a
ponytail off.
Alright, uh, hey Toast, I'm gonna give you a choice.
Okay. Wait, can you tell me
just, uh, why is this film rated
PG-13? Well, uh,
that's a very good
question, and I will
find the answer. This film is rated PG-13 for some material that may be inappropriate for children under 13.
Oh, that's a pretty good reason to rate it PG-13. Thanks.
You're welcome.
Uh, hey, could I get a review from a fandom user?
Nice, but kind of cliche.
I'm not saying you shouldn't do it, though
I totally think you should make this
I would totally see it in Theatress
What the fuck are you talking about?
I already made it, it's here
That's a legitimate spelling of theater
Oh shit, you're right, it is
I'm sorry, a fandom user
I didn't mean to besmirch your spelling
You did it right.
Hey, Toast. Yes.
I'm giving you a choice.
Alright.
The first movie is either called Bass or Bass.
We'll fight it or not,
depending on your choice.
And the second option is Keys to the Empire.
Hmm.
I'm intrigued by Bass Bass.
Bass Bass.
I hope it's both.
I hope we're going to learn about a guitar playing fish.
About that bass.
There's a good chance we'll never figure it out.
Let me tell you about...
Let me tell you about...
I'm just going to go with Bass.
Let me tell you about Bass.
Bass is a movie
that will be released on May 16, 2020.
Synopsis.
An undercover agent is given a
mission to kill a terrorist that plays
several loudspeakers all over the world.
Damn it, I guessed wrong.
All over the world in nearly a decade.
And planning to destroy the world by playing a kind of
Bass that will make the whole world move. I'm sticking with it.
I don't care.
Can you click the poster? Yeah, please click the poster. Oh, what of bass that will make the whole world move. I'm sticking with it. I don't care. Can you click
the poster?
Oh, that is the tagline of the movie.
I can't read it. It's really great.
Okay. Nothing will stop it
because you're listening it.
Good one.
It's a thinker.
The plot. The movie begins with a femaleer. The plot.
The movie begins with a female walking at an office.
Take that, office!
She got a letter from her brother that said... It's totally...
Hello, male!
It later shown she is an undercover agent, Agent Rose.
She is given a mission to catch a terrorist...
Terroristrist?
Yeah. Terroristrist. She is given a mission to catch a terastrist planning to destroy the world by placing several loudspeakers underground in every country and then playing a kind of bass.
The bass is 13557000000 kilohertz.
That is a frequency that is so far higher pitched than our ears could possibly hear.
I don't think this person knows what bass is.
That's the extreme opposite of bass.
That is 1.3 petahertz.
That is a frequency which scientists called the god bass.
Playing this type of bass will move
any object at different directions
per 0.1 seconds.
What? Different directions per...
Okay. Whatever.
Words. Fuck it. Words.
The bass is enough to make windows shatter
into pure powder.
Lock and unlock doors.
Lock and then unlock them again.
Just fucking with you
when you're trying to get to work. Stop it, Bass.
Stop it, Godbass.
Mess up your CD collection. Godbass!
Lock and unlock doors, windows,
safes, locks,
etc.
Just storage units.
The padlocks on the storage units just unlock.
So fuck it with locks and anything
else in particular. Spawn mega tsunamis,
destroy mountains, erupt
volcanoes, create an electromagnetic
magnetic pulse that will kill
any electricity and electrical energies
because that's what electromagnetic pulses
do.
And force people to move at several directions
while their organs can explode.
Can,
not will, can.
It's the North Star frequency.
Oh, it's...
If it so moves them, their organs will explode.
It's really gonna get you.
It's button three in Michael Jackson's Moonwalker.
Oh, it totally is!
At first, Rose didn't believe it.
Well, what's not to believe, Rose?
Come on.
But when her boss stimulates it by placing a speaker upside down facing the table and playing the bass,
it made anything at the table jump, move, and shatter.
It even made a glass of water become stationary at the air, holding its shape, too.
Did it make you sweat?
Okay. air holding its shape too. Did it make you sweat? After 15 seconds, with the bass still playing,
the table completely shattered
and the books around the room started to fall from the shelves.
Well, you were haunted, dipshit. That's completely
incidental. Yeah, the ghost picked that moment to haunt
and it's like, oh, they're blaming the bass.
Shit.
Yeah. Always gotta come down on the bass.
Okay, the door is seen locking and unlocking by itself.
The painting's fell, bottles of alcoholic beverages explode
while the beverages stay stationary in the air just like the water.
A mini tsunami occurred at a vacant aquarium
that pushes the aquarium off a table, destroying it.
What?
Could you imagine being like a CGI special effects person
and getting this?
It's like, okay, animate this.
Oh, and their cell phone started to glitch.
The boss stopped playing the bass and continued.
When Agent Rose's coughed some blood,
her boss says it's the bass that done it.
Jesus.
It's the bass that done it.
The agent... I'll tell you what
first i'm not gonna quit the agent started to the agents start to research first and found that the
terrorist is four copas yeah four copas she then got some advice from her agents and they started
to look for four several weeks passed until they found
four.
Let's skip forward to
Volcanoes Erupts.
Good point.
A good place to start. Let's see.
Okay.
There's only one paragraph.
Volcanoes Erupts.
Tsunamis occurred anything.
An EMP started
That killed all the power
While four's place
Still have power
And people struggled
To survive
After the bass ends
Rose found a door
It leads to four
Four saw Rose
And later surrendered
Because four can't do
Anything to save him
Rose repaired anything
By playing another
And another type of bass
Called a bass.
Wait, wait, wait.
I'm sorry.
I missed it.
That's better.
This is bass.
The other one was bass.
No, it is not.
He's correct.
It's another type of bass called life bass.
Life bass.
It basically turned all of the power on again and making any chaos like toxic air flooded areas to be safe again.
Once the world is safe.
They just play the film of the disaster scenes in reverse.
Yeah, that's it.
It works.
Rose became a top agent and recited a speech live at the whole world.
After reciting her speech, everyone cheered with a big applause and the movie ends.
You joke, Esfahan,
but that just cuts your special effects
budget in half.
I know.
Yeah.
Who's saving money?
There's deleted scenes in this one.
I want to hear the second
deleted scene.
A deleted scene is shown where
Four is seen naked at the
top of the trapdoor.
It is later revealed that he is
sunbathing. Sometime later, he
went to one of the abandoned yet functioning
houses, later revealed to be his old house, and
cook his lunch, and do his everyday things
naked.
You had to make the rating, though.
Damn.
Can I hear some quotes?
I think these quotes? Can I hear some quotes?
I think these quotes are good.
Those are good quotes.
A terrorist is born to kill people.
Or cope us.
A type of bass?
He's right.
Kill all people in the world?
Are you fucking kidding me?
What is this?
A new movie for the movie franchise Independence Day?
Agent Rose.
That's the witty snark that we've come
to expect from the main character.
An agent like that
is not what you call a top agent, Rose.
Boss divot.
Miss, we
found out where he is.
One of Rose's agents.
That's a classic quote.
We found where he is. Oh, the unknown actors and That's a classic quote. We found where he is.
Oh, the unknown actors and actresses
are coming back to play this.
I quoted the shit out of that.
Getting a lot of work on this wiki.
Every role in this movie is Alan Smithy.
Hmm, interesting.
Discovered talent.
Which is impressive.
I don't think you can Alan Smithy yourself as an actor.
They made it happen for us.
All the actors have pixelated faces.
Broke the rules for that.
Alright, we're getting near the end of this.
Frank West, I'm going to give you
a choice.
So your options are
the first one is Hale Frazier.
Yes.
And the second one is Banana and Kiwi.
Hale Frazier. Okay. And the second one is Banana and Kiwi. Hail, Frasier.
Okay.
I mean...
Hail, Frasier is a movie based on the 1993 comedy series Frasier.
It is rated PG for some mild action.
Really?
It's the only time Frasier and mild have been in the same sentence together.
The movie is an original one.
It is coming out in 2030.
Okay, so Kelsey Graham was born in 1955.
Still 75, that's not too old for...
Martin Crane was just shot in the hip.
He has been taken to the hospital
where he has to have surgery.
He is unconscious. Frazier is where he has to have surgery. He is unconscious.
Frasier is way too upset to do anything,
especially to go to another part of Seattle,
Witch Daphne!
Daphne!
Wait, Witch Daphne?
Witch Daphne!
It does an exclamation point.
He cries every day, thinking
Martin is dead.
Did anybody check?
A service is held in his honor.
Everyone Fraser knows comes to support him.
The song that is the name of the movie is sung, like a British marching tune.
This doesn't work.
Hail Fraser! Hail Fraser! This doesn't work. I don't know what it was supposed to do, but it doesn't work. I am Frasier. I am Frasier.
This doesn't work.
I don't know what it was supposed to do, but it doesn't do it.
Frasier doesn't come to his radio show until nine days later.
There is no Niles Crane in this because he goes to visit Martin every day, which is unseen.
They couldn't get him to agree to the script.
Good thing you mentioned that.
What is seen is when Frasier comes to see Martin,
where he is shocked he is still alive.
The sitcom is on TV!
He loves it, he claims.
Huh.
Some Transformers references are made in here.
Naturally, yeah.
As they are wont to do.
Which Martin says he was defeated like Megatron
and his Decepticons.
Decepticons.
Decepticons.
Frasier says that the Autobots
would never experience something bad like
losing a family member.
Member.
He has no clue what they even are.
He doesn't make
sense, like Roz says.
Martin is alive now, and Frasier is happy.
Did Tiger make a choice?
Oh, baby, I hear the blues are calling.
Decepticons and Autobots.
My, oh, my.
Hey, Esfahan.
What?
I'm going to give you a choice between a couple short ones.
Hey, Esfahan.
What?
I'm going to give you a choice between a couple of short ones.
The first one is called The School of Monsters, colon, The Movie, dash, The Mythical Strike.
Okay. The second one is called The Micronal.
Could you use the second one in a sentence?
Nope.
Okay.
Better the devil you know,
I guess. Monster school?
Because the rest sounded like alphabet soup.
Sure. Just to use my chrono
in a sentence. Ryan creates the robot car
called Camaroa113
at Cars Construction
Robots at his home of the Micronal
as his result of the United
Kingdom cast edit.
Oh, well, that cleared it right up for me.
So, I've used it in the sentence.
You're welcome.
The School of Monsters, the movie,
The Mythical Strike.
The School of Monsters, the movie,
The Mythical Strike is about a book
I'm writing.
The movie's coming out before the book.
No, it's not a movie based on it.
It's a movie about the book.
A movie about the book.
Okay.
It's an autobiographical.
The School of Monsters, The Mythical Strike, the book is about when Mike Scarings saves
Dracula from a gang of mutants and is rewarded by taking in part of a school of monsters
in England where New Transylvania
is located.
A new Transylvania?
It's still in Romania.
The movie is based off
my idea for my book.
The idea is that Terrence Richer,
who is not me, descendant
of a famous monster hunter,
sides with the mutants to follow his ancestors'
legacy and destroy all monsters,
but is defeated by Mike Scarrings
and teams up with an army of
mythical creatures to destroy the school
in New Transylvania.
The movie is an action movie.
Oh.
Okay, here's the synopsis.
It's about an evil boy
and mutants who teams up with mythical
creatures to destroy a school in New Transylvania, but is defeated.
Here's the plot.
When Mike Scaring saves Dracula from a gang of mutants on Halloween by buying him a plane ticket and giving him sunscreen,
he is rewarded by being invited to a school of monsters in New Transylvania, England.
He makes friends with a mummy, the son of Frankenstein, and a vampire at the school,
while having fun and making new inventions.
After Mike stops a
gang of mutants invading the school,
the toughest mutant, Time Master,
makes a plan to bring Sheila Richer's descendant
to their side. When he joins
them, he attacks the school of monsters,
and when he fails, he teams
up with an army of mythical creatures for the
ultimate attack,
and has beaten my Mike, the kid that he picked on for years.
And then he is crowned king of the mutants,
and sends the four toughest mutants other than Time Master to destroy Mike.
Then the screen says, to be continued.
I can't finish my own story.
Deleted scenes.
Even though the whole story is not here, I still deleted some scenes.
Driving around looking for the school and watching TV.
It was just too packed with things that happened.
Give me a quote, baby.
Give me a hard-ass quote. The mutants will all fall to the might of the mutants.
Oh, wait. The mutants will all fall to the might of the mutants.
Oh, wait.
The Civil War has begun.
And we've got one last one, a real short one, Bunny Bread.
Yeah, baby.
Are we sure we don't do the clips for sale episode?
Hey, sorry.
Bunny Bread, tell us about the Species remake.
Oh, damn.
All right, so you know how I feel about titties, right?
Great, yeah.
I'm pro.
Okay.
Aren't we all?
I just thought that somebody should remake the original Species for theaters.
Because the original Species was not saving theaters.
Yep.
That's why we've all heard of it.
Okay. Major changes
to original.
Okay. Alright.
The movie will focus more on Syl
than the scientists. That's one.
Syl will wear the same puffy
ball gown throughout the film.
You know the ball gown she wore throughout
the film, just in that one scene.
Okay, good. Syl's
channel surfing will be extended.
That's how you draw them in.
She will be wearing her puffy
ball gown, of course, throughout this.
Yeah. Syl
will have a hard time reading in English
to simulate what it's like for me to write.
Syl would comb her hair with a fork.
Okay.
Hey, listeners to the F+.
I want that fetish episode.
Syl will comb her hair with a fork.
I'm sure if you track down whoever wrote this, they'd be happy to fill you in on it.
Syl learns to speak from TV.
That's right.
Merchandise, Syl toys and plushies should be included.
Funko Pops of the characters and a Pez dispenser set with various forms of Syl in the movie.
That's the Puffy Ball Yowl.
Hot, hot franchise.
I just jerk off and I think of money a lot.
I suspect the entire motivation is like,
man, I'd love to have a Funko Pop for this movie,
but it needs to get back into the...
The zeitgeist of pop culture.
Yeah, it needs to get back into the zeitgeist of pop culture.
So just make the remake so I can get the stupid toy.
I don't know.
More channel surfing.
Fuck, I don't care.
What do you think we learned today?
Hollywood.
There actually is a group of people out there
who could be making worse movies
than the people in Hollywood currently are?
Yeah, I think people who take their grade school writing assignments think,
huh, this would make a good movie.
Is there a place we can just put fake movie ideas?
And they search for Movie Ideas Wiki, and they just drop them here.
I learned that today's kids have a lot more... They've really adjusted their expectations
because they're all releasing these movies
at least 15 years in the future.
Yeah.
That's weird.
How long does a movie take to normally get released?
90 years seems like a lot.
That's some real development hell.
Yeah, the problem is you release a movie,
it's already in the public domain.
That's a lot of rewrites for the
script. I don't know. I like bad writing,
so I learned I still like
bad writing. If you like bad
writing and discussing bad
writing,
you should come to Ball Pit.
And I will.
What's the internet address?
Oh, the internet address is
http://
Okay, slow down, slow down.
Hang on.
Oh, yeah.
You had me at the point slash.
p-a-l-l-p dot i-t
For the low, low price of $10,
you can converse about awful things
and wonderful things at the same time.
You're a madman, Boots.
$10 for all that?
Yes.
It'd be a deal at twice the price.
Well, okay.
You could make a fake account and pay for that one as well
and then not use it.
What a value.
But why even bother?
You're done and done.
Go do something fun.
It's okay.
There's probably shirts.
Bye.
Shirts.
Bye.
Good night.
Yeah, good night.
Shirts.
Hey, baby, I hear the blues are calling.
Toss salads and scrambled eggs.
Maybe I seem a bit confused.
Yeah, maybe.
But I got you pegged.
But I don't know what to do with those tarsalads and scrambled eggs.
They're calling again.
I feel pretty good about that one, guys.
I feel really good about this.
We could probably just wrap it up here. Yeah.
Welcome to the shortest
F Plus ever.
Clapping sounds for half a second.
Cuttingourlosses.mp3
I guess I'll take this one. clapping sounds for half a second. Cuttingourlosses.mp3.
I guess I'll take this one.
No, no, let me.
No, no, I want credit for this one. No, no, I want to burst my cherry on this one.
Guys, I lost the clapping audio.
God damn it, Lemon.
God damn it.