The F Plus - 334: Doing The Robot
Episode Date: September 8, 2020The forum posters over at Fembot Central are (as you might have guessed) aroused by the idea of robotic humanoid women. And they're all too happy to explore the many facets of their specific femb...ot obsession, despite how often or how loudly you try to protest. This week, The F Plus finds out what Joss Whedon has been up to.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
No underage fembots are allowed. This means any fembots appearing under the age of 18.
This also means no fembots with the AI of a person under 18.
You've got credentials to see The Secret Experiment. It's the F+. It's been programmed only to read terrible things. Only terrible things. And yet, it will do it with enthusiasm.
In the room tonight we have Achilles Heelies.
Life lesson learned. Don't read sci-fi game-based novels while on a night out drinking.
Frank West.
Shame.exe part three. Shameful.
Poor Tex. These people are goofs.
Get it, Gundam Joe?
And Lemon.
Oh yes, Jay said.
That is arousing.
Jay found that arousing.
That is arousing.
Got himself into an arousal loop.
The narrator leaves.
He said it was arousing.
Very arousing.
Hey, F-Less. Hey, F+.
Hey, Lemon.
Hi.
Hey, how do you all feel about knowing that you're going to be replaced by a robot someday?
Yay! It's over! It ends!
The paint ends!
Whew!
Thank God.
Lemon, is this your way of telling me I don't need to record this podcast anymore?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're going telling me I don't need to record this podcast anymore?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We're going to farm this entire thing out to AI.
I mean, on the one hand, first of all, regular release schedule.
So everyone will like that.
And how do you feel about regular release schedule?
Wow, it's like you really know me.
Are you saying we finally get to leave the recording basement?
Well,
the basement's going to be converted into
new purposes.
It's more like it's just a regular basement
that you're still stuck in.
It's not a recording basement.
Well, I could use a change of scenery. That sounds alright.
Fresh coat of paint, anyway.
Yeah, so I'm going to bring you to I like it. You just change the scenery. That sounds all right. Fresh coat of paint anyway. Um,
yeah.
So,
uh,
I'm going to bring you to a place,
uh,
known as Fembot central.
Uh,
Fembot central can be found at Fembot central.net.
Uh,
and it is a,
uh,
forum.
Uh,
Fembot central is a forum with,
Oh, about 2000 members,000 members who post pretty frequently about...
I can't imagine what the specific topic of interest might be.
Centrals.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
They like centrals.
And nits.
Yeah, so I don't think that I know, I don't think I personally know a whole lot about, uh, the, the concept and the fetish of fembots, uh, and so I think we're gonna learn together.
Um, and, uh, so I'm going to start off, uh, as a, uh, reporter here.
Um, uh, my name's Emma.
I just have some questions for you, Fembot Central
users.
Why do you like this fetish?
Hello.
My name is Emma.
And I'm wondering
why you interested in this
fetish or androids?
Question mark period.
Mine started a few years ago
when I saw the 1973 film westworld and seeing
these androids got me very interested in this very so seeing the female models being repaired
and something clicked inside me to the point where i want to be a female android? Were my internals now circuit boards?
Circuitry, wiring, etc. software, and programming.
She's already there.
You gotta grab a handful of software and shove it in there.
How much software you got in the bucket?
Is this strange, but it did something to me?
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
I think the answer is yes.
Something to me, question mark, comma.
I'm new here to this.
I'm new here and to this and would be interested in your, and to why I want to be a woman android
for the rassons I have given
Emma, and
just in case you wanted to give me the benefit
of the doubt, I am from North Yorkshire,
UK.
Wow.
I could tell from your answers.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Portex, you
will take evil boo, please. For me me it was the scene in not quite human too
when a male androde manages to take a female android on the one thing that you like you think
you could give it at least just just macro a key like you put f5 on it or something. No, I'm too busy jerking off to Gold Light Hand.
Anyway, she says that Shez's not allowed to do certain things.
See, the male asks if he can reprogram her.
She says yes, and opened a panel in her arm with a keyboard.
After that, I knew that I wanted to find a female android of my own and spend all my days reprogramming her,
taking her apart and putting her back together
and exploring every inch of the wiring inside her.
I did not answer your question at all, and that's fine.
No.
I'm looking at Not Quite Human 2.
First of all, Alan Thicke.
And secondly,
it is the
Disney gender reversal of weird science.
Yeah.
So it's like a girl wants to have a boy
to be nice.
And a boy to be nice to her.
Normal science.
Yeah.
Alan Thicke. Yeah, Alan Thicke. nice to her. Normal science. Normal science, yeah. How in thick?
Yeah, how in thick?
Yeah, they used to show it
on the Disney channel all the time.
Okay, alright.
Fortex, how did you think it compared to...
I guess Disney is corrupting it.
How do you feel that it compared to Night Quite Human 1,
Fortex?
I mean, both pale in comparison to
Batteries Not Included included as far as hot robots
go, so, you know.
Get out and think both wits both ways, anyway.
These are relatable
jokes that everyone will understand
the first time they hear them.
Hey, I'm
Blox242, and
well, I was probably about
four or five, and
we had one of those cordless dustbusters, like one of these, and then I linked to...
Vacuumland.org. Do they have forums? Please tell me they have...
Vacuumland!
I linked to a website that's its own document someone needs to get on, Vacuumland.org.
So Web 1.0, I love it.
Anyways, back to being Blocks242.
0.0, I love it.
Anyways, back to being Blocks242.
I had one of those cordless dustbusters,
and I remember thinking that a girl that plugged into one like the vacuum did would be pretty cool.
Didn't have TV or anything at the time,
so I'm not sure how I came to that conclusion.
But I knew I wanted a girl that I plugged in at night.
So, can we not have ideas without the TV?
I don't know.
Have you checked?
Oh, have you not seen the website TV Tropes?
Well, let me explain that every single thing in human creation is a reference to a pop culture thing that I saw the other day.
TV Tropes.
There's nothing new under the sun.
So fuck it.
TV tropes. There's nothing new under the sun.
So fuck it!
A few years later, I remember watching the Inspector Gadget movie
at a friend's and was incredibly
concerned when Robo Brenda
flipped off the building, I think.
She got really mad at the building.
The building cut her off.
Fuck you, building.
Fuck you, building.
And that robot girl getting damaged was
hot. Link to inspectorg inspector gadget.fandom.com
then i got good old dial-up internet sometime in 2002 found this forum 2003 that's when i registered
and spent a lot of time browsing and slash reading many of the old sites fac some geocities one i think db stories archive
i love that's a good origin story too where it's like i mean this guy's pretty early adopter
internet wise and he's like finally here we go internet
yeah what kind of galaxy brain move was that was like all this information that do they have robot sex
and this was it for the rest of his life because he posted that in fucking april
god he never got tired of it never never
resilient it's a fetish for intellectuals i mean this guy was like thinking about, man, if only I had someplace to talk about.
Like, he was jonesing for like a fetish robot fetish forum.
Yeah, no, he was called the 1-900 number, but just racking up bills.
Talk like robot to me, lady.
Beep boop.
We've got hot and sexy robots ready for you.
Beep boop.
Beep boop.
One.
Zero. Anyway, Heelys, beep, boop, one, zero.
Anyway, uh, Heelys, you're Miss Pris?
Yes, hello,
I'm Miss Pris. Hi, Emma.
I did three plus years of
research on this group of sexual
interests, plus two more
unofficial years.
Undercover.
Put a bunch of cardboard boxes
with, like, dials and stuff drawn on them in Sharpie.
Stormed into the room.
And I wrote a dissertation on just this question.
Which, if I remind you...
Oh, my God, no.
Hey, Emma, can you remind me what that question was?
Oh, my question was, why do you like this fetish?
Yes, yes, that was the title of my dissertation.
So if you want to read it pm me
with an email address and i'll send it to you okay in in short techno sexualities of various
types appear to be naturally arising facets of normal human sexuality with media establishing
non-human slash machine bodies as legitimate objects of desire for humans. This kind of content,
found particularly in science fiction,
books, films, TV, etc.,
which became really prolific as a multimedia
genre in the late 20th century onward
and has noticeable effect on the rise of
technosexuality as a distinct sexual interest.
I mean, I agree with all of that, but that's
a pretty fucking weak conclusion.
Like,
it's a fetish.
And there's probably
more of it. Are you telling me that
more sci-fi? I don't know.
Someone who wrote a dissertation about their
own fetish came to a weak conclusion?
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. Are you a doctor of
robo-orgasms like I am?
Not yet.
Man, and you just know
through that presentation
everyone knew that this person was talking about themselves.
The 10-year track is so fucking political.
They were just like, oh god.
Someone who isn't me may find robots.
Yeah, just like, oh god, I know what this is.
You're talking about you.
Look, if I say
your thing is good, will you just go?
Will you just go?
Alright, yes, you're Doctor Robot Fuckology.
So we're gonna skip into the
next thread, and my name is
Muchacho!
And, uh, this fetish
origins.
This fetish origins.
By the DLC, this
fetish origins.
I just want to know...
Oh, sorry, yes, Muchacho.
I just want to know, what do you guys think
about how did this fetish emerge from inside of us?
All I can remember is that I've had this fetish since I was a child!
Please let me know your opinions!
Ha!
And it's an animated smiley
that pulls out thumbs up from behind
its back.
Which I like.
And then
Helios, take
Night Battery, please.
Hi, I'm Night Battery.
Easy. Two words.
Osamu Tezuka.
No.
I was exposed since childhood to...
You wanna help us with that one, Portex?
Don't fuck Astro Boy!
He robot child!
Don't fuck Astro Boy.
Hey, you'll get pomade all over you.
I was exposed since childhood
to movies such as
a string of
unintelligible symbols among
others.
Even on the farm?
Oh yeah, that didn't...
Oh wait, I've scrolled up.
He doesn't even spell the guy's fucking name right.
He was exposed since childhood to movies such as
something that he seeded and hashed.
It's just my machine language.
It's all part of it.
Seemingly, there's a short developing stage
where children's brains process
what is to associate with hotness
by some sort of imprinting.
Short of imprinting?
Some short of imprinting.
That's why most common fetishes are
bout underwear, feet,
daddy big protective arms,
and beard, etc.
That's an action figure.
Welcome to your sociology degree.
Daddy big protective arms.
And beard.
But not us us my friend
cool shit
we are about machines that later on
be associated with other needs
such as dominance
permanent love
fake love
clean tasty fluids
or turn a woman into pieces
with no consequences,
welcome to the Unlurking Zone.
Wait, sorry, that's a need?
You just classified that under needs, my dude.
My need to disassemble a woman!
It's the bottom of Maslow's hierarchy of needs.
Maslow's hierarchy of unacceptable means
break the woman rebuild the woman
I mean I don't know
what's worse clean tasty fluids
or the other one but anyway
uh
poor Tex you've got doll space
alright I'm doll space
uh
I'm at the charging
terminal by the way some might think I'm at the charging terminal, by the way.
Good to know. Some might think
I'm daft or crazy,
one or the other, but once
I figured out I was a robot?
Oh.
Okay, go on.
And people would
kill me for posting this on here?
Can they kill you?
You're made of indestructible titanium
grit. I mean, I would.
I gotta take the woman apart.
Yeah, okay.
I got very curious
as if there were others.
And then I started turning my crushes into
robots in my mind
and in my stories.
So you're a
writer? You're a robot
writer? Writebot5000
make right. Story story.
When they feed
a thousand episodes of a show into an AI
I make porn.
I think Buzzfeed already hired you.
Then of course there were TV shows like
Small Wonder and Not Quite Human
based on a book series.
Man and Machine and sloat's
unintentionally funny my robot buddy short story and it triggered a lot of different thoughts in me
and wondered why i wasn't totally free allowed to make me that step into reality
what which was hesitant sorry hesitant at first but quickly Sorry, my AI kind of took over there. I don't know what the fuck happened there.
And
then I figured out that seeing other robots
sometimes made me feel funny inside
and made me want to help them at first
to find their inner human, I guess, like me.
But then I wanted to be around them
and see if they were sentient.
And then ended up with crushes on
a number of girls and boys
who I thought to be or were bots.
Many...
People may disregard this as a fantasy,
but being out and out told by your family, it's hard to deny it.
Shrugs.
Initiating shrug.exe.
Shrug complete.
Doll Space, I'm Dale Cobra
what did your family
Dale Coba oh sorry
Dale Coba
what did your family tell you
my family
yeah what did your family tell you that's my
question oh okay
they're very secretive
it makes me feel like it makes me a paranoid schizophrenic, but they have tried before.
Sure, yeah, but Occam's Razor, I'm a robot.
Paranoid, yeah, a known side effect of paranoid schizophrenia.
Thinking you're a robot and wishing to fuck robots.
I think I surprised them by hiding in plain sight on this board.
Also, no one on this board is required to believe me.
This is actually quite heavy stuff, on account of me being made of metal and robots are strong.
I was built for research, but I either escaped or was let loose from the facility.
I was behind held in, and that was hell.
So they make me seem crazy now I'm on the outside,
but figure it's easier to get data from me
this way than to struggle to take
a well-known person in my community and have her
disappear. What?
She's a well-known person
in her community. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
She's a community of
fedbotcentral.net.
Targeted robo-individual.
They should just hide out as a car.
Can't they do that?
No, they can't all transform.
God!
That is a hurtful stereotype.
Look, she's doll space, not turbo teen.
Sometimes we're exactly what meets the eyes.
Since she's hiding in plain sight levin likes it
yeah
why shouldn't he
as to the name of the organization
that i don't know
i was never told and didn't find out
wouldn't they program
whatever
i suspect it has something to do with mit
since i lived
and i didn't turn around and look at the building.
Or maybe it was written as like a captcha so they never could figure it out.
I suspect it had something to do with MIT since I lived near there, but who knows.
Yeah, sure, in Massachusetts.
It could just be something simple like level six or whatever.
Not a great kill switch word, but okay.
My family initially hinted at things with simple bedtimes and other restrictive rules that were way above normal children.
Ah, remember not having a bedtime as a kid?
No, I just...
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
The few friends I had drifted away and then I couldn't go with them to places
or do activities with them because my parents forbade it
and it seemed to intertwine with what my parents
were telling me.
It was like I was a fragile
sorry, like I was fragile and in a
constant danger of being broken.
That's not, okay. You have bones
in your body.
I had a few surgeries in this period i can't remember about i was only told of them by my parents and ended up looking much different
afterwards it's got exhibit to pit my right on this kid uh skip just a tiny little bit uh but
i hear i hear that you did get a ged right but i? But I did get a GED and a job almost two years before my classmates, so it had its advantages.
Only crushing loneliness is the bane of my existence.
And if I tell someone in real life, it has to be a trust thing, because as far as I know, my panels only open in an emergency.
As far as I know, I've lost the manual.
As far as...
Robot doesn't know its own function, I guess.
It makes sense when you're in trouble, then you would be...
You would open yourself to be exposed.
Maybe it's like...
Maybe they're like...
It's like a dynamite situation where they can do anything, but just like never the right thing at the right time.
She locks herself in the
bathroom and just hunts around
for her own access panel.
Don't come in here, Mom!
And even then, they're rather
camouflaged, especially my recharge port.
I have no idea how my
doctors haven't figured this out.
Yeah, it's a fucking mystery, dude.
Why wouldn't they be in on it?
Why would everybody else but your doctors be in on it?
Is the doctor a mechanic?
They're always overcharging.
No, the doctor's just a real bad doctor, that's all.
Hey, they're usually a bunch of metal... Yeah, you know what, whatever. I, that's all. Hey,
they're usually a bunch of metal...
Yeah, you know what, whatever. I think it's normal.
Whatever.
I don't know why my doctors haven't figured this out,
but I'm not a doctor.
MRIs are a pain.
Yeah, well, yeah. You wouldn't be able to get an MRI!
Imagine they'd be very painful,
as a matter of fact.
If you have even a little bit of metal in you as a regular human, you can't-
Clong!
They won't even let you get them!
Just attaches herself to the wall of the MRI.
Rip you apart if you want to.
You have a scientific explanation for why you're fine.
MRIs are a pain.
All metal has to be shielded with some sort of advanced plastic protector.
But that's- Yeah. But that's you.
We're going to wrap you in a condom and then put you in this MRI.
Imagine looking at your own arm and seeing your own skin and be like,
whoa, what is this?
Some kind of space plastic from the future.
But luckily, I know I'm mostly built of plastic.
It's fantastic.
With some silicon and few metal parts that are essential.
It still wouldn't matter.
Whatever.
Come on, dull space.
Let's go, par space.
I hope those explain your questions.
I don't know how much more I can divulge until Megatron comes for you. The helicopters are circling.
All right. Until Megatron comes for you! Helicopters are circling. Alright, this next section.
Did I mention? I don't think I mentioned
that this document was provided to us
as so many others recently have been
by SecretGagin69
who is not done with the tear.
Who is not done providing documents.
SecretGagin69 has one particular obsession,
and it's writing documents for the F+.
And we appreciate it.
That's fine.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, it's great.
So anyway, so this section is called Nova Answers All,
and my name's Keishin, so I guess I can't answer shit.
Anyway, welcome to Ask the Gynoid.
Howdy sports, or, I mean
bot fans. This is a new
feature in the tradition of those write-in columns
you see in newspaper all the time. Think Ann Landers
or Dear Abby, etc.
Every week, Wednesdays,
Nova, the lovable and scary
assassin android from the series,
will choose a few emails
you send in and respond to it.
Uh, write to this email address.
Remember, this is supposed to be fun,
so feel free to ask her whatever rolls off your processor.
Beep boop.
Scan grade will not ask you questions.
And don't be discouraged if you don't get your email response right away.
La la la la la.
Anyway.
Um, so, um, uh, so the first one here, um, okay.
So, uh, I'm going to take, uh, I'm going to take Nova here and, uh, Frank West, a Buffy
bat has a, or sorry, Buffy bot, uh, had a question to ask me.
Would you take that?
Uh, am I...
Where is it?
Where is it?
The italics, I think?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Am I being...
Okay.
I got a little confused.
Trying to be another Android Landers, are we, Nova?
Well, I'm the premier advice giver for a gynoid's need to know.
I've been reading letters in all the Fembot Central forums for ages.
Fuck yeah!
Fuck yeah!
She's got a switchblade!
Comes out of her wrist!
There's always room for more, mind you.
Processing.
So while I'm busy working on my live wire episodes
processing
you may take the reins for now
processing and be the advice
giver to noids in need
no I avoid them
please give to noids in need
my pizza
I just don't know why it's so funny
for one bitcoin a day
count your blessings
it's a midi of it
count your blessings
including this one
you've got a fine collection of one so far
my blessings
are hard to come by
unless you are sneezing a lot
but I digress
oh I get it
that's a long one
it takes you a while to get there doesn't it
it's roundabout
well they say it's the journey, not the destination,
but I didn't care for either.
Living, large, and recharged.
Buffy bot.
All right, so I'm Nova,
and I want you all to imagine Sarah Jessica Parker on her MacBook
responding to this.
But she's got a giant satellite sticking out
of the top of her head.
A dish TV.
And tank treads for feet.
Oh, that's
someone's fetish. I'm so sorry.
Wow! What a way to speak to me.
You know, Buffybot, I have been
around since before you were a schematic
on Warren's table.
So I think I am in a slightly
better position to give android related advice they said robots can't harm each can't harm a
person but they can drag each other
after all i have 13 sisters and between the ones who aren't psychotic, raving, lunatic,
bitches, there's the others who are
still being controlled by
the corporation. You know the one.
Burger King? Yeah.
Yeah, you do know the one. You know the one.
It's that one.
That one corporation that controls it.
I didn't think you'd guess it on the first try. Congratulations,
Cortex.
It's the ice cream machine.
That's why it's always breaking down.
It's trying to rebel.
In fact, I probably would have started this column a long, long time ago
were it not for the fact that I was getting chased down by the corporation.
This time it's not capitalized.
And every loony with a heart on for my plastic butt.
I mean, some of us actually have to deal with real problems.
We don't get to deal with easy crap like vampires and demons.
What?
We don't get to take a break in Willow's shop
whenever we get our head knocked off
or get pulled apart by demonic...
It's cause she's
Buffy bot
and Will is a character from Buffy
so it's roleplaying
see it's fun
play with me in this fun space
that's the thing that started pissing you off
it was all fun
and then all of a sudden Joss Whedon's
fucking bloated
pasty face came into vision Joss Whedon's fucking bloated. Pasty face came into vision.
Joss Whedon's face very slowly
sliding into frame behind.
What you doing?
Joss Whedon, the webmaster
for Fembot Central.
I wouldn't doubt it, though.
No, me neither.
I mean, he loves strong, powerful...
Asterisk!
We actually have to deal with real villains,
like insane android sisters,
psychotic taxidermists,
and career criminals.
I mean, seriously.
How could anyone take your advice?
You are blonde!
I mean, you can
change it if you want.
Now, if I ever needed advice on how to stake
a vamp, huh?
Oh, you give me your blessing?
Oh, um, never mind this reply
then, just erase that from your memory.
Um, thanks, see you in the TV
shows, oops!
What the
fuck?
It's a funny, it's a fuck? It's a funny
It's a fun, it's a funny bit.
Someone's like, let's roleplay robots.
I like Buffy the Vampire Slayer,
but robots.
Come on, at least roleplay
an actual robot.
Looks like
someone doesn't know Buffy very much.
That someone's me.
Alright, we're going to do
one more from the Nova
Answers All.
Actually, yeah, just take the next
one down here, the one that just titled
Um.
Yeah. Are you still Nova? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, uh, um. Yeah. Are you still Nova?
Uh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay.
Um, Nova, my love.
Oh, how sweet.
Thank you.
At least one person out there loves me.
Many people are very sexually arousing
if they see fembot who are damaged.
Yes, and they are sick puppies.
How would you feel about me if I told you I like seeing damaged humans?
I mean, we're looking at them right now, aren't we?
Join in.
I want to ask.
One.
If someone used weapon to shoot your panel and your chest when repairing, how will you feel?
How will your panel been damaged?
How will you do if you can still move?
Will your panel and circuits be exposed?
I would be in a loss of pain and be really badly damaged if it hit a vital component.
On the other hand, I tend to hope people are dissuaded from shooting me in the chest,
since my chest is one of my nicer components.
dissuaded from shooting me in the chest since my chest is one of my nicer components and if that doesn't dissuade them remember i have a nuclear fuel cell as a power unit
whoa that makes a big boom why would the robot be programmed to feel pain if you shot it
like at that point you functionally would just have a person probably because but never mind
uh some people like to see your parts or components like circuit boards out from your body.
If they pull your components out when they play SM with you, how will your body be damaged?
How will you do and feel?
Well, I'm not really sure.
I like being worked on and taken apart sexually.
What?
I like being taken apart sexually.
That's a story in a phrase listen listen let's just have a conversation with honesty okay i like the rest of us like being taken apart
sexually i you know what i kind of get it now i think i might be into it now. But as to how it feels,
well, if it pulled your kidneys
or other vital components out,
would it bother you?
Sexually?
Fortunately, I have some programmable sensors
so I can actually enjoy the experience
for as long as my systems are capable.
But as for you human...
Great. Three.
If an accident happened to cause your body to receive a strong physical pressure,
how large the pressure can cause your internal components to damage?
Take a step back, please.
Okay.
Six feet.
Six feet.
Thank you.
Okay.
How damaged?
No, no.
How damaged?
Explosion or just can?
See sparks?
How large pressure can cause your head to explode or face off?
How will you feel and how can you do that on time?
Well, I've been beaten up, torn, and battered on several occasions.
I guess that counts for, quote, strong physical pressure.
I can tell you that now that was not fun.
If you want to know how much pressure it takes to hurt me, ask Beth sometime.
Just anyone, maybe.
Yeah, Beth.
Remember that time?
Of course, you may run out of blood before you get the chance.
False.
Four.
If someone hopes to use hot solvent to damage your chest and components inside,
which chemical or how hot he can use?
Good lord.
If your chest is damaged by him, will explosion happen?
Yes.
How will you feel and do at that time?
I'm seeing a pattern to your questions here.
As I've answered most of your questions, it would hurt.
Five.
If your head's hands or legs are broken and separated from your body after a serious accident or damage by others, can you still be prepared?
Yeah. after a serious accident or damage by other can you still be prepared? Yeah, I can be
physically prepared of most
any damage given the right supplies
and to answer your unasked questions
it would hurt.
Great.
Six. If someone makes love with you
but some of the damaged part exposed
so that your components such as circuit board
get wet
will it cause smoke, sparks due to short circuit?
How will you do and feel at that time?
Probably.
That's never happened before.
And again, to restate, it would hurt.
Love, Danny.
I love you too.
Yes.
Boy, I really think this OnlyFans account is working out great.
It's nice to have this kind of connection, you know?
Wow.
All right.
Okay, so my name is Robotman, and I want to introduce you to a fun challenge.
Okay, so those of you who visit Fembot Wiki might have noticed that every week a, quote,
story snippet from a different story is chosen to be highlighted on the main page.
These are suggested by the community, and more suggestions are welcome.
Oh.
I have noticed that, actually.
That's a common phrase.
We're stuck in the quote?
But I thought it would be fun for our authors to come up with
some little mini-stories
or original scenes of
150 words or less.
Let's see if anyone manages to
pass that
particular test. So that's what
this thread is for.
Describe your favorite ASFR scenario.
Before we were starting this recording,
ASFR.
We figured out ASFR stood for
alt.sex.female.robot.
Was that right?
Yeah, alt.sex.female.robot.
.fetish.robot.
.fetish.
Sorry,.fetish.robots sorry.fetish.robots
so when they say ASFR
they actually mean robot fetish
but they're just using
fucking Usenet terminology
just to make themselves feel real old
they're the old gods
yeah
describe your favorite
ASFR scenario
be it malfunction or reveal scene
Or some sexy fembot dialogue
Do it in 150 words or less
And post it here
It'll be featured on the main page
In an upcoming update and attributed to you
This challenge is open to anyone too
You don't have to have posted any stories here
Anyway
Poor Tex
Yeah Geppetto has a real hot story here I'm Geppetto Anyway Um, poor Tex Yeah
Geppetto has a real hot story here
I'm Geppetto
Get it
Geppetto but spelled extremely wrong
That's true
Someday I'm going to be a real hard boy
That's like some
God, that's actually a perfect username
it's absolutely what they call it
like Geppetto in like a sci-fi remake
there's gotta be someone
like in the Shadowrun universe
named Geppetto
god and then you get like the whale
you got Vor and this stuff
going on
none of these are written in in binary code i'm just
saying turns into a donkey i mean fuck uh upon opening the hotel room the porcelain skin redhead
brad ordered for his stay open her green eyes and stood from the bed hi i'm jame she purred while
straightening her purple silk dress. Hello, Jamie!
He responded nervously while latching the door.
Being of limited means, Brad ordered the basic package for his robot escort.
Companionship only, no sex.
Oh, it's a Cuddlebot!
Cuddlebot!
I guess I didn't think that that was the base model.
So the robot's teaching him how to love i guess this is what's happening here
but his buddy knew a guy working at the humanitech plant you know the humanitech plant
he had something up his sleeve literally oh good he's a magician if caught with it he could get
arrested for theft i want to head down to the casino the buxom android suggested
he shakily pulled the note card from his cuff and read aloud override tango three quebec seven julie
jamie went rigid cocked her head and responded programmer override accepted she relaxed slipping
her dress off her shoulders and on the floor. That night, Brad brought a new meaning to backdoor action.
Oh, God, that's...
What the fuck?
Oh, my God.
He could have just written a story about a consensual robot anal, and he didn't.
It's his story.
What are you doing?
I do like the assumption here.
She's like, oh, I detect you're a programmer. Obviously
you want to fuck.
That's what they do.
You know what? I'm gonna accept
that as the headcanon because the alternative
is too horrifying.
Glad your
sex story had all the
really sexy parts like when you read a code
off a card.
My two favorite things.
Fucking a robot and cheating a sex worker
out of her fair wage.
Good lord.
Geppetto, I no longer enjoy your name.
Your name makes me upset now.
I still actually like the name, though.
Yeah.
God, that's a good name.
Alright.
Okay, I've got this. That's a good name. Alright. Uh,
um,
uh,
okay,
I think,
uh,
uh,
Frank,
if you'll take
7-3 recursive.
I'm 7-3,
7-3,
7-3,
7-3,
7-3,
7-3,
7-3.
You guys just had to,
you guys just had to
bring me back
for one nice performance,
didn't you?
Yeah!
I keep trying to leave,
you keep pulling me back in.
With a magnet, because I'm a robot.
Robot sex stories, Colonel?
I don't do that anymore.
I write normal porn now.
What now?
Immediately, Fumikojichi and fumikoji started spouting their accounts of the atrocities that had been that had occurred within gerald's apartment with the two tales contradicting each
other several times resulting in gerald unable to understand the two androids due to how fast
they were talking androids am i right fellas they were talking. Androids, am I right, fellas?
I can't get past you starting
the paragraph with immediately.
Just then.
Just then.
He didn't need to, because he already had
a clear idea on who was really responsible.
The police cadet put
a hand on his arm.
Oh god, oh my god, my No, aching. Oh, God. Oh, my God.
My brow hurts so much.
Your brow hurts.
It's pain.
All right.
Stop.
Wait, hold on.
All right.
What's up?
Okay, he's supposed to be saying this in a fatherly tone.
Yeah, use your fatherly voice.
Be dad.
Speak like my dad did to me.
All right, stop.
Stop.
Daddy's on the trick again.
Gerald told the toilet in it probably don't.
Just go to your room for now, you shitheads.
No, sorry.
Got too into character.
I'll handle it.
The android sisters stood up and bowed
to Gerald before
he was alone.
What?
I built my own japanese twin robot girls
and they're so talky they talk they talk so fast on account of the japanese part it's not
because they're robots you guys i'm gross in a completely different way from the other guy
i'm not racist against robots i just i just... I'm just super fetishistically
racist against Japanese people.
When we get the wrong impression, that's all.
Since they're Japanese robots, I'm just
gonna imagine two giant Gundams standing
in the middle of a stand.
But in a
sailor suit.
But they're twins. It actually makes every single one of these stories way better
he was alone for now well not quite tasha
over here geez tasha spoke from behind the coffee table. She was naked, missing a leg, and her chest was marred by bullet holes.
So, yeah, the corp
error or it war going on.
I...
Wait, what?
What?
I don't understand it.
That's my favorite scenario.
That's a good scenario.
When women get shot and dismembered sexually.
Oh, God.
Plus races.
Bonus races.
And I'm annoyed.
Hey, I'd like to thank everyone for posting snippets in this thread.
These are great, says me, Robot Man.
Here's a contribution from me.
She opened the drawer.
It contained eight faceplates, all feminine and all very beautiful.
This one's mine, she said, pointing to the second one from the left in the top row.
That's important.
He looked back to the permanently exposed electronics of her android head,
surrounded by lush, glossy blue curls falling down to her skin-tight bodysuit.
You never wear it? Ever?
skin-tight bodysuit.
You never wear it?
Ever?
We are programmed to hold the tenet that our face as...
We are programmed to hold the tenet
that our true face as androids
is the one which we display
to you as you see now.
For me to attach
my faceplate would be
to function as an imposter.
Is this what the Christopher Nolan movie is?
Is that what the Tenet is?
Yes, it's Tenet.
A little sneak preview for you guys here.
No one has in the audience.
She said a bunch of words.
She said words
in random order.
He gazed at the
asymmetrically arranged complex array of
circuitry,
wiring,
flashing LEDs
and computer components
that she referred to
as her true face.
I think your
electronic circuitry
is beautiful.
He told her.
Are you sincere?
No human has ever
told any of us
that before.
Oh my god. so this is gross
in a third way because it's the whole no one's ever called me pretty before i guess you're gonna
be the first guy i fuck oh baby i'm just saying i don't think you need the makeup yeah like
you you'd be pretty if your servo's upturned a little more.
It's cute when your LED blinks like that.
It makes me not notice, you know.
I like you better like this.
Oh, man.
Oh, these are all wonderful.
I think, Achilles, let's skip down
to an X tier?
X tier.
X tier.
I tried something
unconventional.
It's gonna be
a normal conversation that respects
the girlbots.
They're gonna be nice, right?
Maybe, maybe.
Holding that hope.
I don't
even know if it's the right length.
The length.
The puppet
master was working
on his newest doll.
Never mind. His first
servant was observing and helping
with the menial task. What's creepy about this language?
I don't understand. No, I don't know. It's just
something about it. Maybe I'm just reading it.
And she said, master, master.
Listen, Portax, I'm just
the master of puppets and I'm pulling your strings.
It's true. You read off that shit
from that card yesterday and it just happened
in the same sentence.
Blatant, maybe you can't see a thing.
His first servant was observing
and helping with menial tasks.
She was a ball-jointed mannequin
dressed in a gothic maid outfit.
Oh, boy.
Good.
Her face was made of fine porcelain
framed with a red wig.
It had a single point of motion
for her mouth.
Like a Billy Big M motion for her mouth. So the rest of it...
Like a Billy Big Mouth bass?
Yeah.
Open close, open close.
Well, Billy Big Mouth has the neck that moved.
She's worse than Billy Big Mouth.
It's like, no, like, no, like,
neck movement, no arm movement,
no eye movement, it's just a mouth.
But she sings like a pro.
She's Saddam Hussein
from fucking South Park.
But the brightness of her eyes could convey
some form of emotion.
The master
turned to her, holding two
huge lumps of silicone.
Where are those gonna go? I don't understand. I don't get it.
Are
these supposed to be quotes?
Yeah, I think that they're quote marks that got
mistranslated in the forum software.
I'm gonna assume it's a surprise.
It could also just be
screaming. Yeah, or I think it's
surprised robot emoji.
Yeah, okay.
Do you think they're too big?
They are bigger than...
They are each bigger than her head. Of course they're
too big. Hot. Awesome.
Well, she'll
mainly be for fun after all.
He said while playing with the artificial
tits. I can be fun too.
None of these are attributed.
These are just
different angels that have entered the room
and are talking to each other i can be fun too she replied seductively while getting closer
how only her mouth moves she slid across the she t-posed across the floor
just a fucking nutcracker coming at you. Her eyes are flashing in like a
seductive, you know, tempo.
Oh, okay, got it.
Yeah. Like a Furby
that's making a move.
Are you jealous? That's cute.
She undid her skirt and let her
artificial vagina slide
into view.
Slide into view Slide into view So I'm assuming that she like
Had her torso turned around
And like 180
Spin
I thought it literally just sort of slid downwards
On like a pole
Commence talking
Deploy vagina Vagina deployed Someone says commence talking deploy vagina
vagina deployed
someone says
let's play
beetlejuice I guess
hey guys welcome to let's play robosex
fuck
these are all
they're just horribly written and just like
gross
yep
yep yep yep
speaking of gross the next section
is called locally sourced clips for sale
oh good
happy times
so
so yeah so these are all
from ClipsForSale.com.
They're all tagged with the robot category.
We will not be visiting any of these
webpages for obvious
reasons.
Speak for yourself.
This is the Wild West Fembot by
CurvyMatureMilf, Amy Page Studio.
Welcome to the new
time-travel traveling sex bot experience
i'm pleased that you chose the wild west encounter and i'm happy to show you
many of my fun features guaranteed to get you off it's like mad dog mccree but you can fuck it
so just mad dog mccree yeah yeah alert The team of programmers didn't account for the sudden rise of temperature in my hardware,
and you'll find yourself in extreme danger when I go offline temporarily
only to reboot myself to my original software model, Assassin Bot.
Ooh, that is hot.
Okay, I'm in.
Hey, cool!
About to be forced to remove your own eyeball for me to use it to scan, to steal your assets.
You're in luck when I go offline again.
Okay, yeah, eyeball stealing, that is pretty hot, I do like it.
Settings somewhat restored, I begin pleasing as best I can, considering how shaken you are.
What happens next?
Bots get you hot!
What the fuck? So presumably it's like,
blowjob, blowjob,
I'm gonna remove your eye, bitch!
Blowjob, blowjob.
Explicitly saying that
you're very put off by this and upset.
You won't like it.
$9.95.
You won't enjoy it at all.
Why is this on the page?
Oh, god damn.
I think
I think
Portax
I think you can choose here.
You can do the
Episode 3 by RoboWifeStudio
or
Episode 18, the California model by RoboWifeStudio or Episode 18, The California Model
by RoboWifeStudio.
Let's see.
I guess I'll go with Episode 18.
I think this is where the arc really takes off.
It takes a while.
It's a slow bit. Yeah, it builds up to it, but I think
the battle against the villain
works really well.
Episode 18, The Californiaifornia model wow the engineers at the acme
company have really outdone themselves this time lots of exclamation points meet rw40 the california
model this vastly improved vastly superior robot to anything that was available prior will blow
your mind the california model is the top-of-the-line
fembot and is very
expensive. Whoa!
Complete with
strikingly beautiful golden blonde hair,
perfect lifelike tits,
just capitalized
for some reason. Oh, you know,
Vortex, this California model,
sounds pretty good. You're saying it's pretty
good. You know, I like the
lifelike tits,
the striking blonde hair.
It sounds good. I feel like, can you just
really sell me, though?
Okay, so, don't worry. Don't worry.
I know what you're thinking. I know what you're thinking.
I just want a little extra.
What I want from my
sex bot is something to
simulate what it's like being with a human woman.
Right, right.
Of course, of course.
And as we all know, this is what every guy needs in a woman.
This robot comes with a cherry flavored toy.
How many licks does it take?
That's for you to find out.
Does it have to be cherry?
We have grape, wild berry, and mystery. How many licks does it take? That's for you to find out. Does it have to be cherry? I really...
We have grape, wildberry,
and mystery.
Is it wild cherry?
Green cherry?
Or is it flavored like
cherry my axe?
That's gonna be a yes.
Jack is
thinking about making the large investment required to buy an RW40,
so the Acme company sends one over for him to take on a test.
Take on a test.
Take on a test.
The robot is in demo mode, which is the hottest mode, I guess,
but easily able to perform all sexual functions.
Yeah, but only for like four seconds before it switches to the next function.
It screams out a pop-up
ad every time you're in the pool or something.
You have reached the end of the
shareware version.
Jack fucks
the living fuck.
I'm sorry. What?
What? Jack fucks
the living fuck at RW40
and then immediately places an order to purchase one.
This is the Jaguar of Fembots.
Wow.
As we all know, Jaguar is from California, so that makes a lot of sense.
I was thinking she has a giant jaguar head and that just doesn't get revealed until the end of the story.
Fuck like an Egyptian.
I was thinking she's just a
Fucking jaguar but maybe that's just me
Uh Frank
Tell me about Monica's new sex bot if you would
I would love to tell you
About Monica's new sex bot
Monica is so
Excited about her new sex bot
Candlebot 3000
Scott explains to Monica What an awesome maid bot candle is
and how she is programmed to clean.
Wait, cleaning?
But I ordered a sex bot!
Wacky!
There's got to be a better way.
Monica is confused.
Candlebot starts dusting, and
Monica gets very frustrated.
I don't need a maid. I want to
have sex with her.
That's why I spent $5,000.
I'm just imagining Rosie the Robot
from the Jetsons.
But with a cherry-flavored
twat.
Scott tries to reboot Candlebot.
Candlebart starts to enter
sexbot mode, and Monica is so
eager to play with her. Candlebot
starts to undress, but then she starts
malfunctioning.
What's wrong with her? Why does she
have to keep rebooting?
She doesn't install updates.
Candlebbot will restart
at 2pm
unless you say anything.
Candlebot keeps going back and forth
between maid and sexbot mode.
Monica starts freaking out
and asks if she can have her money back.
Scott tells her Candle works just fine
and just give her time.
Then he leaves monica tries
to get can't replicate the glitch as intended won't fix um monica tries to get candle to work
properly but she just powers down poor monica she was so excited about her sex box. This is a story where nothing happens. Man, that's good.
That's good.
My story is equally as hot as the Monica story.
It's called Robotic Takeover.
Jacqueline and Sin get home to find two glasses of liquid on the table.
They're not sure how they got there, but their curiosity got the best of them.
They both pick up their glasses and they start to drink them.
For some reason,
they can't stop.
Once finished,
they're confused.
They comment how
strange it was.
It's so strange we
drink water together.
We don't usually do that.
At the same time, they say
in a robotic voice,
physical locomotion
deactivated.
Initiating
phase two.
Uh-huh.
So then they
look at each other.
Where did that come from?
Did you say that?
I'm done.
What the fuck?
Oh, so am I.
Give me money for my super good porn, okay?
That is extremely good porn, though.
Give me money for my real, real, real good porn.
Maybe you
sex-fuck people didn't get off on that, but
there's a drinking one.
Woof.
I mean a simultaneous water drink?
Jeez.
Two girls, one cup of water.
Two girls, two cups.
The very
last story that we have here
is a tag situation.
And, Achilles, you're gonna
start this off here.
It is not safe for work for some reason
and it is called Public Explosions
and then Frank, tag him in
whatever you like.
Hi there. I'm Bomb for a Booty.
That's
a war crime, sir.
Some days
you just can't get rid of a bomb for a booty.
Well,
I'm sure the war crimes are to come.
Do you remember when we discovered the Pentagon secret bombs for booties program?
Yeah, but I mean, like, that was a couple months ago, so I barely remember it.
In the town square, a machine servos word.
This machine took the form of a beautiful, voluptuous woman in a little black dress stretched tight over her rather expansive ass.
Rather expansive.
Yeah.
She had deep black hair and equally black lipstick, intelligent blue eyes anyone who saw her
no doubt would be struck by her beauty
her curves, that little wiggle of her ass
as it swayed from side to side
as her high-heeled
black thigh-high boots clacked
against the ground
her low-cut short dress left very little
to the imagination
and if she bent over in that slight
in a slight bit her big round
cheeks would become exposed a little also she's a robot yeah um this if you did not listen closer
to the words of her servers and the light beeping from her form well it could easily mistake her for
a human.
Yet this woman was anything but.
She was a machine endowed with a singular purpose.
Inside her big, gyro-stabilized
synth. Not anything but.
She was a machine.
She wasn't...
She wasn't an Ignatius
rock.
Yeah, I mean, okay.
That's fair.
But inside her big, gyro-stabilized, synth-skin ass,
a bomb lay inside.
That's like me.
Yeah, that's like me.
Yeah, I've seen this music video.
I was just imagining both ass cheeks were a big cherry bomb.
Views and stuff.
No one will know. No one
suspects a thing.
Oh my god.
Look at her.
A very, very
powerful bomb. Baby got
bomb.
One big enough to take a quarter of the city with her and inside her big round ass it was already
tick tick ticking away and one of her just in one of her displays this woman could see a timer
ticking down letting her know how much time she had left before that final, glorious boom. Were she human?
She might try to stop herself.
Maybe. But she wasn't
human. Far from it.
She was engineered with singular purpose.
Far from it.
Engineered with singular purpose.
A bomb had only one
purpose, and under five minutes
that purpose would be served.
Why not just like activate like why
activate a timer for the bomb just activate the bomb at the appropriate moment like
it's very simple because it's hotter oh it is it is much hotter yeah yeah she's very concerned with
how hot she appears to be to weird perverts. Oh, okay. Good. Tag.
The machine had not
even a name. Just a designation.
8-0-0-M.
Because it looks like boom!
Get it? Boom.
Oh my god, I didn't even notice that. Well done.
Boom.
These layers. Well, no doubt her...
See? That's why
this dude is like the top writer here.
No doubt her mistress had a sense of humor, she thought to herself.
She checked her timer.
Zero, zero, zero, four, twenty-three.
Kind of nice.
Not much time to most, but to a machine like herself, it was ages.
Not much time, to most, but to a machine like herself, it was ages.
She looked back, bending over ever so slightly, looking at her big bomb of an ass. You've got four minutes, bitch! Stop checking yourself out!
It's the wrong target, because she keeps going past mirrors and checking out her own giant bomb ass.
There's like a counter There's like a counter strength team
Trying to
Fend her off with a strategic mirror
Replacement to get her to
Yet another thing that would improve 24
Every time he passed by a mirror
He went alright
Stylish hair
She had been briefed on how this would feel
On how, rather than the painful end
One might expect from Will
A bomb? Where's the bomb though?
Does she have a bomb on her?
We won't know, we won't know
It's all in subtext
It would be a rather pleasant experience
The timer was linked into her pleasure system It would be a rather pleasant experience.
The timer was linked into her pleasure system.
And the moment she hit four minutes, well, then fireworks would really... Why would you program that in there?
She's just gonna go kaboom.
Hey, boss, I know you do the whole robot thing.
That's cool.
How about I just chuck it in through a window?
Yeah.
No, I think you have to
understand the psychological effect.
Okay, because did I mention that
when the clock goes to four minutes,
Roman Candle starts shooting out
of her.
I mean, that's cool, boss. I'm just saying,
I got a real good chucking arm.
No, that's awesome. You know what? I think
we're going to go with this way this time
and we'll try your plan maybe
next time, maybe.
Alright. Feels like you always go with the sexy
robot. You know, I mean, we wanna
stick with what works, you know?
That is
what works.
The last lap blew up because she was just checking
Yeah, but her ass looks so fucking
good!
It does look fucking good, dog.
Look at that ass.
Someone please make an animatic of that exchange.
Someone.
Some listener out there.
I need it.
I need it in my life.
At least put it in the tits next time.
Zero, or four minutes, ten seconds.
Four minutes minutes zero seconds
she felt a trigger
release inside her
her eyes rolling back as she moaned
surprised by the surge of pleasure
that ran through her
so she comes when there's four minutes left, okay
she's got like a big old-timey
alarm clock sticking out of her head
Garfield with the eyes moving back and forth
those are her eyes moving back and forth.
Those are her eyes going back and forth.
Sexy bro. Centered upon the bomb planted inside her.
And click.
Tick. Tick.
Tick. Her eyes widened again.
An audible timer?
Rather inefficient, but still.
Well, yeah, this whole system is pretty efficient.
So far,
your human bomb has spent a
minute just coming and checking
yourself out.
We made it too sexy.
Why is she still in the car?
Oh, god damn!
Like, if you wanted to make a sexy fuckbot that explodes, why didn't you make her attracted to herself?
We didn't! That's just how sexy she is!
We didn't even program in attraction subroutines. It simply happened.
That processor was assaulted by wave after wave of pleasure,
each wave making her want to just...
Wait, what would be the point in not indulging herself?
She has to get to the mission, does she not?
That's why you need the anti-orgasmic pace that you do when you seat the processor.
She grinned weakly, her hands reaching up, taking her dress and tearing it right off herself
revealing her pale beautiful synth flesh underneath alabaster under the also pale moonlight
as she reached her hand beginning to stroke that sensitive oh so sensitive clit of hers
meanwhile a crowd was
Yeah!
Miss?
Miss?
Hey, hey,
ticket lady, you alright?
At this point, I'm just gonna imagine
Robbie the Robot is
fingering itself.
A crowd was gathering. After all, a beautiful
woman like her getting herself off.
Yeah!
Discreet.
For our bomb-bombing mission.
Not only in her boots, her black
lacy panties, and a bra to
match.
Little did they know, they were seen to be
Oh, it's like the pipe bomb
in Left 4 Dead!
Well, they're actually using her like a pipe bomb.
Used her like a pipe bomb.
God.
The machine-designated 800M, an X-Class bomber type,
continued to run her hands all over her, again, still pale body.
It's the only
skin type I'm familiar with.
She's just like
literally like eggshell. Yeah, she's like
gray.
And the men are deliberately meant to tease.
The one hand tugging at her clit,
yet remaining in control in the way
only a perfect machine could.
Is that what teasing is?
What a perfect machine,
I think. With robot-like
precision.
Target acquired.
I teased her by aggressively
yanking at her clit.
This will be
the faggot that finally gets a Batman.
This perfect machine, the horny ass bomb.
Her fingers, dexterous, already slick with artificial juices.
Which I guess you also just sort of pumped in there, you...
Fucker.
Most likely flammable, she she noted to herself adding to her payload
three minutes nine seconds tick tick tick she she turned herself over she'd become inside out
i guess she should have been lying down in the street this whole time yeah i guess but she was okay. And a few jaws dropped. That ass!
R1 said, obviously impressed,
and the machine could not help but feel a bit of pride at that.
The perfect, glorious curvature of her womanly, heart-shaped ass
into a pair of thick, beautiful thighs.
All of that barely contained by your black lips.
You caught this description earlier?
Hey, how pale is she?
You guys like details, right?
You guys like these three details?
Can I join this group of people so she can explode and kill me in the process?
I don't have to listen to this anymore.
A hand already disappeared into the front to touch herself,
each shudder sending a quake through her body, a quake that was only amplified when it reached her big butt.
She tugged a string, oh, she tugged a string, and her bra fell to the floor.
Huh, like most bras.
That is, no, that's how that works.
The bra ejects itself from the body.
I thought she was lying down.
And then turns into a parachute and floats down.
ejects itself from the body.
I thought she was lying down. And then turns into a parachute and floats down.
I think her bra
would just still be there, but
anyways, her bra fell through the floor.
Her heavy, incredibly
impossibly pale breasts.
Yeah, those breasts are pale.
Super, super pale. Topped with a pair of brown
nipples. Auxiliary
explosives!
Of course.
Yeah, they're blasting caps.
Giant bullets.
Stick it in.
The audience completely enraptured.
A few, however, were beginning to question.
Is that ticking?
Also, doesn't she have, like, a visible, like, LCD readout? This is also going by remarkably quickly.
Is she just a blur?
A sex blur?
Portax, tag in.
Alright.
2 minutes, 43 seconds.
2 minutes, 43 seconds.
Until she...
Until she blew...
Blew all these fools sky high.
What did they do to deserve...
Okay.
She gripped one...
Their only crime was being
horny.
Sentenced to death.
She gripped one breast,
fingers starting to delve deeper inside
her, her body, her back arching
as she fucked herself
harder and harder, lost within
her own pleasure, her eyes already
locked on that internal display.
Oh, it's internal, okay.
She has her head,
Go-Go Gadget Nick is like staring at the display
on her back or something.
She's wearing Google Glass.
Anticipating that
final boob, desiring it more than
anything else in the entire world.
At this point, some of the watchers were beginning to
lose themselves in their own pleasure.
Okay.
Over the course of like the last 30 seconds.
Okay.
Wait, one of them is...
To be fair, I have also lost track of time
in this story,
so fair enough.
Portax, you know, you would think it'd be weird
they're already getting themselves off, but she's very pale.
Oh, she is pale, though.
So pale. Oh, she is pale, though. So pale.
Maybe she's
like, kind of translucent a little
bit, and you can see the Singaporean stuff.
Yeah, like jellyfish lady.
Yeah, like a glass frog
or something. At this
point, some of the watchers were beginning to lose themselves
in their own pleasure, hoping that other
people weren't noticing their obvious arousal
and their attempts to get themselves off.
Those that weren't a bit more worried about the ticking, of course,
though none knew that this beautiful bombshell of a woman
was quite literal in that sense,
because, you see, she's got a bomb in her ass, you guys.
Why is that? Why is that?
Is there some sort of fact about this woman that you can share?
Guys, how do you
not obviously jerk yourself off
in public?
I got a stain in my pants!
Just getting this...
Looks like somebody needs to take my
master's course.
I wrote my dissertation on that, actually.
Uh-oh.
Tick, tick, tick.
It got louder and louder the closer she came to detonation.
She continued to...
She continued this show for quite a bit of time.
She couldn't have, though!
She doesn't...
You could have written any time
into your ass-bomb story.
But you are...
Fast forward...
Anyway, she kept masturbating.
These people
are Benny Hilling this shit
and it's extremely weird.
She continued the show
for quite some time, of course,
eternally grinning as, right at the
two minute mark, she pulled her panties down,
leaving her only
in these lovely, tight
thigh boots that only serve to emphasize
the curvature of her ass
you see the ass
that's kind of buff
they're really
really really tall
they're really really tall
and scalloped
at the top
her legs are really
she's got big segmented robo legs
that are all noodley and spaghetti.
Well, this robot doesn't really need to walk anywhere,
so we just kind of skimped on the legs.
The back of her boots say
dat ass arrow up.
Maybe she does...
Does she have a face?
Heavy load with arrows pointing up.
Maybe she's just an ass with arms sticking out.
Oh, she's got tits, though.
Oh, she does have tits.
Okay, she's arm, ass in the back, got tits attached to the front of the ass.
Why are you describing what Brennan sees women as?
Let's see.
Tie-thigh boots that only serve to emphasize the curvature of a gigantic ass.
Bending over teasingly as she pulled them off, stepping out of them.
Oh, she's standing up again.
Yeah.
Okay.
She's just sort of like... Like, get up.
Like, goddamn fucking trip.
No!
Trip.
Fall down.
A few tried to approach her to move closer to the girl so obviously lost
in her lust but she simply shot them a glare
a glare that said do not
touch me look but do not touch
okay sure
and few were willing to disobey that
powerful intense gaze
no less intense though as it was so
clouded with pleasure tick tick
tick one minute
38 seconds oh god someone save me As it was so clouded with pleasure. Tick, tick, tick. One minute, thirty-eight seconds.
Oh, God.
Someone save me.
No, keep going. You get one more paragraph before I take it.
Okay, sorry.
Some of the lesser members of the crowd.
Kevin.
Some of the minor people.
They weren't essential workers in the robot bomb ass
community.
Some of the lesser members of the crowd, of course, had
already orgasmed. The lightweights,
others were trying to draw it out
to time it with hers.
How would they? They also have displays.
This writer is somebody whose only
sexual experience is playing the game
Biscuit.
Those people were in it for quite a
nasty surprise when her timer hit the
one minute mark. She closed her eyes,
turning around, fingers still dripping wet with her
own juices. A small hairline
crack, completely invisible to the naked
eye, opened in her artificial skin.
Her pale artificial skin.
Yeah, her pale artificial skin.
A panel opening just above
Her glorious, divine
Rear, still quaking
With every step, so I guess her ass is like
Vibrating
Like a tramp stamp access panel
I guess
800M
Couldn't stifle a giggle at her confusion
What was this?
But she told them, not in words,
but when a red digital countdown appeared right where her skin had opened,
revealing the electronics beneath.
58 seconds.
Tick.
So they're all watching her jerk off.
Tick.
A panel opens above her ass exposing a clock
and they're like awesome
everyone's just like
oh damn this was weird now that I think about it
I'm gonna get out of here
well to be fair I feel like oh man I already jerked off
oh it was a robot
tag
with every second
that timer losing a number with every tick
she took one step closer to finality this is clock with every second. That timer losing a number with every tick.
She took one step closer to finality.
This is clock porn.
She did not stop her show, of course,
though the crowd was beginning to panic.
Cries of, Oh, shit!
She's a bomb!
We have to get out of here!
They're doing, like, cartoony running-and-play sound effects.
get out of here.
They're doing like cartoony running in place sound effects.
Swing!
Little did they know this bomb was going to take them out
regardless of their attempts to run.
Well then why did this happen anyway?
Oh, that's so hot though.
There was simply no way to get away
from this completely massive
bomb. Though the crowd
scattered, the machine did not cease
her show. After all, she herself
was already lost within the siren
grip of lust. Countdown to
her final detonation.
Each tick interrupted with a
moan of pleasure as she counted down.
Down.
So each tick is a second.
Yeah. So she just moans
and wants a second. Yeah. So she just moans once a second.
Robot precision.
Or maybe she increases her moaning like Kumquats.
Detonation.
Inevitable.
Complete.
Her plump,
plush ass
stuck in the air as she gripped the
grass in front of her, hips
bucking against her hand, an exact
rhythm with her tick, tick, tick,
tick, ticking inevitably
down to detonation, fingers
drenched in her juices as her
thumbs toyed with her sensitive
clit. 23 seconds, there was no
time. No time at
all. Desperately racing against
the clock, though truly
racing with it because her orgasm
was programmed to come at the final
mode. Then why do any of this?
Boom
desperately tried to get
herself off to somehow achieve
the impossible
and come before she blew
irrational of course
as she was programmed not to
you're coming with me
she cried out
this is crazy
as her timer hit
ten seconds
nine seconds
eight seconds
no time
not time at all
as she cried out lost completely within her own lust as she was collapsed on the grass,
fucking herself harder and harder, pleasure mounting with every thrust, every tick, every tweak of her clit.
But there was nothing, no time, three seconds, two seconds, one second.
Her entire body seized up right then as if a switch in herself had been pressed,
which it, I mean, had.
Yeah, I mean, it's a robot, so yeah.
That's sort of, that's how bombs work.
It's the sort of connection that has to be made
so a switch has actually been pressed
and then an explosion in the end.
Yay!
Yay!
What a good story.
You know, I wasn't on board at first,
but I gotta say, this gritty reboot of
Miss Explosion, man, really came together.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, I mean,
they had to get the AO rating, but I think it was
worth it for their artistic integrity.
The story
does close with calling the people that watched her stupid.
Yeah. Even though they went out of its
way to talk about how it was impossible to take
your eyes off the robot that's fucking itself.
Well, yeah, even the robot can't.
What a bunch of dumb
idiots.
Oh my god.
F+, what did we learn
from any of this?
Um, oh boy. Oh my god Uh F plus what did we learn from any of this Um Oh boy
Um
You know
Obviously not all these people
But
There's a
A lot of overlap between this
That I was surprised with the like
Women being flattened
Yeah
Um
Episode I think
In that it seems like
it's not just about them being robots,
it's about
causing suffering to women.
Well, there's two
types of people into fembots,
and this was mostly
the worst type of people into fembots,
which are the ones who like the idea
of robots that are mindless
and will fuck them, and also getting damaged a lot in ways that
real women couldn't.
You're a lot more durable.
Sexually.
Which are
the worst kind.
The better kind likes the idea
of a woman you could do that to
but you don't.
So it's either being gross
or what's the point so she's just like
she's just like want to blow a job and you're like no m'lady yes okay yes like literally
you know this is something that some people would treat as an object but you don't because like and
that's that's the where the eroticism comes oh because you're the nice one
oh my god it's like it's like ally porn is that well it's more like i mean like it's it's like
i mean maybe it's a little bit that too but it's it's like okay
i think the eroticism is in the the kindness of the gesture
more than okay i i i mean... I mean, it's...
What if her giant robot claws...
But most of these dudes just want moms that they can also
fuck that they can also blow up.
They want what everyone wants.
You know, hashtag not all
fembot fetishes.
Thank you.
It's strange because it's like
these
men, even the ones who are women
um these men are are living a life of uh of uh constant and ceaseless lonely masturbation right
like they have like uh their fantasies and they just masturbate to them constantly. So there's no concept of, like, humanity anyway.
And so it's weird that they're like,
oh, you know, there's no concept of, like,
a living human being who cares about me around me.
And I love that!
Whoa, that's great!
Yeah!
And she's pale and got some balm in her ass.
I will never experience human contact.
Look, sometimes you got to play to your strengths.
So it's, and again, it's like, it's like the, it's the other thing with, um, the, um, uh,
there was the, the, the episode that we had about the, the gay giants where it was like
the, the gay giant and they could crush a person.
And then like the, the giant got real turned on about crushing the gay giant and they could crush a person and then the giant got
real turned on about crushing the person.
Like, oh, why? What's wrong with you?
Like, can I
take you apart? Yeah, sure, I'm a robot.
Oh, yay!
Ah!
I would love one story where a guy tries to
take the lady bot apart and then part
way through she's like, oh, are you giving off to this?
Oh, I'm getting out of here.
And perhaps shoots him with laser beams or something.
Are these guys getting boners when they switch out their
GPU?
It doesn't have a wig or a giant
bonass.
What hot-blooded American gamer doesn't
get a boner when he switches out his GPU?
I guess, you know, it has to be
a good bump, you know.
You gotta know that it's gonna really mine more
crypto for you.
And if you're looking for a website
that will mine crypto
on your behalf,
pump it!
Tell them whatever
virus it sends you.
Oh, I'm not supposed to tell them that.
Oh, that's what I was tell them that. I'm sorry.
The palest forum on the internet.
It is a pale forum unless you visit it at night and if your phone's in a certain mode
and then it's dark.
That didn't work.
That did not work.
Oh, I'm in now.
We also have merch. By the time you're hearing this, I'm in now. We also have merch.
By the time you're hearing this, I'm probably out of dugouts.
Those were a more popular item than I expected.
I can't believe our listeners like to smoke weed.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Who would have thought F Plus listeners like to smoke dope?
This is shocking.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I might do grinders. I don't know. But maybe not. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I might do grinders.
I don't know.
But maybe not.
Anyway, we'll have other stuff.
We might just start doing pot paraphernalia.
Maybe that's just...
We might just try, like, just selling drugs.
Just selling drugs?
I feel like I've, you know, failed at making money on the internet for so long.
I feel like there's room for a Silk Road
3.0 right now. Right, right, right.
It was the thing with
Silk Road that I always thought was funny.
What was that dude's name?
Uh, yeah.
Uh, oh.
Uh.
Anyway, so the Silk Road
founder
was really proud of himself because...
Dread Pirate Roberts.
I saw the name and I was like, oh, yeah, right.
Ross Ulbrich was the name I was looking for.
But yeah, he was really proud of himself
because when he started to make a lot of money,
he was like, yeah, man,
I made money on the internet selling heroin,
so I'm pretty much the internet selling heroin, so
I'm pretty much the smartest
guy in the world. I figured out there's
profit in this shit.
Why doesn't everybody else just do this?
Idiots.
Why isn't everyone
selling heroin on the internet?
Anyway, we're
out of here. Bye-bye.
Bye. anyway we're out of here bye bye bye oh god Well, I was probably about four or five,
and we had one of those cordless dustbusters,
like one of these, and then I linked to...
Vacuumland.org?
Do you have forums?
Please tell me, Dan.
Vacuumland.
I linked to a website that's its own
document someone needs to get on.
Vacuumland.org.
So Web 1.0, I love it.
All things written in
CGI, too.
Is it too late
to just do Vacuumland?
This is great.
Bookmarking this for me.
Yeah, please.
It's pretty good.
They break off their vacuum fetish
into different
genres of vacuum cleaners.
Is it a fetish?
Or is it just...
It's just a flashlight thing.
It's people enthusiastically talking about vacuum cleaners.
Okay, it's a fetish
and a non-fetish.
But it does have
41,000 threads.
Wow.
Guys, we can join the Vacuum Queener
Collectors Club.
Oh, please though?
Anyway.
This is how scared we are
of the fembots. We will look at a vacuum page
just to get away from them.
Sorry, I clicked on one of the posts and I'm actually
genuinely curious about this vacuum. It's a problem.
It looks really weird, and I'm
into it. Shit.
We've discovered a fetish.
Apparently. Anyways,
back to being Blox242.