The F Plus - 350: The Similar Worlds Project

Episode Date: March 19, 2021

Similar Worlds is a website where users can share their own allegedly true life experiences in a quest for acceptance, comfort and camaraderie. Naturally, this means going off on insane rants and... getting really excited about being strangled by nerd thighs. This week The F Plus sees two things, but mostly your vagina.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 I, I, whatever the case, they're gonna have to fix it. Adam, I thought you weren't even here! I'm not! Ignore me, have fun! Coming down to get some adult sodas from the friend. So embarrassing. Just keep the door open. It's fine.
Starting point is 00:00:32 He's walking in on us. You say that door is open a crack. That feels like that's not quite a crack. Oh my god. It's embarrassing. Your impression of your son live no my my son's friends are all like and then he just sits there like staring death glare that's all right
Starting point is 00:00:58 that's all right as long as you can work most of the audience yeah hey everybody is everybody here friends with ace one question why the audience. Yeah. Hey, everybody. Is everybody here friends with Ace? One question. Why? Oh, nice. Nice. Love it.
Starting point is 00:01:13 Fuck. Fuck. Damn, that's a stupid podcast. It's the F Plus Podcast. Terrible things right with enthusiasm. in the room tonight, we've got booze rain gear. I've always wanted a woman to run me over with her car.
Starting point is 00:01:31 Frank West. There's an infinite amount of things I haven't shared on the internet. From left-handed radio. Your friend on the internet is named Adam Bozarth. The local werewolf blew a huge load in my mailbox last night. It looks like someone blew up a mayonnaise jar in there. Why does he read the internet? He reads the internet for you!
Starting point is 00:01:51 His name is Lou Fernandez. The bedroom is quiet when the Tooth Fairy arrives. She spots an ass crack barely covered by the blankets. Pulling it down, she finds a big dangling pair of fat balls between the sleeper's legs. She fondles them for a bit and takes a lick. She then pulls out a fistful of coins. She shoves them, and her fist... All right, let's move on to the intern.
Starting point is 00:02:16 You can't simply pretend that an ancient esoteric study isn't real. If it wasn't, why would it still exist today? Facts. Welcome back, Ironicus! I caught my mom having sex. Many times. Kinda cool. Happy days. And lemon. Why is everyone so
Starting point is 00:02:37 horny in here? What happens if you eat the spray from a spoon? Hey, F+. Hey, Lemon. Hi, Lemon. Hello, Lemon. Hi, Lemon.
Starting point is 00:02:52 Oh, so many, so many, so many people. Hey, are you all feeling supported? No. No. Emotionally, physically? Yeah, all of that. Monetarily? Mm-hmm, yep, correct. All of it, yes. Answers Yeah, all of that. Monetarily. Yep, correct.
Starting point is 00:03:06 All of it. Yes. Answers noted. All of them. This chair is definitely falling apart. So many people all feeling completely unsupported. But that's weird. That's weird to me because I know that all of you do have Internet access, right?
Starting point is 00:03:21 Yeah, that's part of the problem. I will find. No, no. The thing about the internet is that it does provide emotional support. You know how like when it's like 11 or 12 p.m. and you're sort of like scrolling through your Twitter timeline and you're like, I'm just getting happier. Whee!
Starting point is 00:03:43 It's like a slide. Just go faster and faster Well okay If that's your experience Then I'm going to change your experience And I'm not going to do it with the experience project Because the experience project Is a website that no longer exists However
Starting point is 00:04:03 Here's a site that was Given exists. However, here's a site that was given to us by SecretGage in 69, and it is called Similar Worlds. Would you like to hear what Similar Worlds is? Sure, yeah, yeah. Sure, it's Experience Project.
Starting point is 00:04:19 Oh, okay. That's it. And if you're not familiar with that particular website uh what the idea was is that uh sort of people would share their own personal experiences with different super healthy and normal things and then other super healthy normal people would help them and support them um and then everyone would just feel better about themselves you could pay uh you could pay five dollars a month to get rid of the ads, or you could do it the normal way.
Starting point is 00:04:47 Yeah, exactly. Yeah, the one thing the Experience Project did not have that Similar Worlds was smart enough to have was a shitload of microtransactions. So we're going to start off with this. This is a mildly adult, a mildly adult comment. And I think, Ironicus, if you'll start us off here. Your name is, your name is WhamFan213.
Starting point is 00:05:16 Thank you, ma'am. My name's WhamFan21 213 and i love mud last autumn i suggested a mud run as a friend's 30th birthday party daytime activity before going out at night i know how much fun mud runs are and one of her mates had done one too so the six of us got booked up. So she'd done one fun mud run. Done one fun mud run. Red leather, yellow leather. So the six of us got booked up on an obstacle course race and headed out to the country.
Starting point is 00:05:54 We were wearing a very superhero catsuit with bright colored tutu skirts cheap from eBay to be as madly dressed as possible but still sort of practical on the course. Of you don't know what these mud runs are like, look at YouTube.
Starting point is 00:06:12 They are mad. Yeah, one would say they are tough. Wild. As we were making our way around the course, the first muddy obstacle was a huge, wide tarp which drops into a huge mud pit. Some of the girls, and one of the guys,
Starting point is 00:06:30 were a bit unsure, but the rest of us picked them up and sent them down first. I loved landing in the mud up to our thighs and sort of rolling out of the first bit, helping each other out as we go along. It's one of those times you can feel your friends up, hands bit helping each other out as we go along it's one of those times
Starting point is 00:06:45 you can feel your friends up hands all over each other whoa whoa slipping and sliding and loads of accidental and deliberate ass cock and boob grabs on each other
Starting point is 00:07:00 whoa whoa this is perfectly fine as we help each other up and, whoa, whoa. Whoa, whoa. Whoa, whoa. This is perfectly fine. As we help each other up and over things and the feeling of slipping about belly down, crawling under nets through mud and wading down the stream waist deep, sometimes having to duck lower as then the course is designed, all drip into wet and filthy in our cat suits and tutu skirts, mud on our faces, but so happy having the best time. Then at the end, it's a cold shower of hard nipples and boners in the wet clothes.
Starting point is 00:07:35 Having a right laugh together. Nothing like cold water for a boner. So which were harder, the nipples or the boners? The night out was fun. I just need this to visualize. We kept throwing out drinks on each other so we were soaked again. Oh, clever. Three of us headed back to my friends with her
Starting point is 00:07:55 and got wild in her bathroom. Oh, wow. Super real stuff that happened. That's awesome. Oh, fuck. George, you fell. Let me help you up. Honk, honk. Why in the bathroom? Didn't they go to a house? Yeah, yeah,
Starting point is 00:08:14 but you know, we're fun. We're fun in the bathroom. And then, so Boots, obviously, there's no comments for this first thread here, this I love mud thread. Can you tell me anything about the sort of like comment form that you can reply to with? Oh, sure.
Starting point is 00:08:32 Like it's got your standard like sort of formatting things. You can insert an image. You can insert a video. You could tag it as regular or nudity. Two categories of comments. Regular and nudity. Tell me about your experience, Frank West. I wet my pants playing video games.
Starting point is 00:08:55 Okay. I'm that DL guy. So, Fallout 76 has come out recently. I was actually in the beta, so my character from beta transferred over so I didn't have to be in the same start area with everyone. But I've enjoyed it so much that I literally forgot I had to be and ending up wetting myself while playing. ending up wetting myself while playing. It might be strange, but I didn't realize at first
Starting point is 00:09:27 until I shifted Abbott in my chair. Then I realized, oh, my pamps are wet. Do you have a spinal injury? How do you not know? My seat is wet usually. There's multiple indications that you've
Starting point is 00:09:44 peed yourself. I can think of four. This is such a good and successful game it was hard to tell through my diaper uh a pebbins brand diaper yeah hey i'm baby is back 2018 i'm baby is back 2018 that very hot. You should message me sometime. The pee is cold now. That's slightly less hot. I had a similar reaction to playing Fallout 76 when I realized they were releasing what was basically a beta. It would take a year to actually release a better game. Lou, what do you like?
Starting point is 00:10:25 What do I like? Let me tell you what I like. I'm Varun. And I like being nude with others who like to be nude with others. The Sphinx's riddle. It's that blur song.
Starting point is 00:10:45 The lockdown was a haven when I was able to drive a bike completely naked. Knowing not many would be out, I would have the luck to bike naked. Of course, there were a few people here and there, but all they did was stare. My name is a Zenra lover. Nice. Thanks. Do you feel supported now? Just by the seat.
Starting point is 00:11:13 But not very much. My name's Lad789. Yeah, uh-huh. Bold. That's what I'm talking about. Hey, the intern. Yes. Do you know what the acronym CFNF means?
Starting point is 00:11:37 I do. Isn't that a railroad? No. What is it first letter first word clothed c f n f clothed female nude female yep
Starting point is 00:11:51 is that it yep exactly okay great to that extent uh the intern um can you tell me about your story of uh c f n f uh yeah i love c f and f um roberta's roberta's CFNF? Yeah, I love CFNF. Roberta's nude photo shoot, right? So there I was with a woman
Starting point is 00:12:13 named Roberta. She is a very beautiful woman in her early 40s with big C-cut breast and a hourglass figure. She is a beautiful woman with a very, very lovely body. I am a female photographer named Kata Lynn in my early 20s, 26 years old. I don't know why you're mentioning that you're a female so many times. I'm sure it'll be relevant.
Starting point is 00:12:47 The parent in the text, the mid twenties started age 28, by the way, for the record, I have five years experience in this felid graduating form collage with a degree in photography. I have taken pictures like landscapes vases people no children and models male and females i'm very good at my profession but this right here was very much of a challenge
Starting point is 00:13:21 doing photos of a nude woman. So here I was in the studio getting the camera ready for the shoot. Now the camera is now ready. Then there, Roberta came out with a blue robe on. What do you have to do to get the camera ready? Do you have to
Starting point is 00:13:39 set the lighting and the emotional needs? You gotta replace the filaments and the flash. You have to change it from base vases to people. Now, camera, I'm about to take photos of a nude woman. I don't want you embarrassing me. Gotta put in the 1890s film cartridge. When she came out, she had a confidence about her.
Starting point is 00:14:03 Confidence. Confidence. Confidence. Quote, Sandra, aren't you a little bit nervous about this nude photo shot? I said to Roberta, oh, no, Caitlin. I'm very comfortable with the shoot. I took a bubble bath. Then after that, the women with me in it dried my naked body. Oh, there's more than one woman. Dry me, women. I appreciate
Starting point is 00:14:31 that you hired those women to dry my body off. Then ladies did my makeup and rub cream all over my naked body. So I'm ready to shoot. Let's start, said Roberta anxiously. I have to admit she has a lot of confidence and boldness about her. So neither of these women
Starting point is 00:14:54 knew about these other women, so they're just sort of freelance wandering around. Yeah, no, she's got like four or five ladies-in-waiting. She's got like four confidants that hang out with her, too. I guess that explains who Sandra is. Let it rip, I told Roberta.
Starting point is 00:15:11 Yeah! With one movement, she took off her robe and threw it one side on the ground. There she stood, naked, not embarrassed but bold. It's the Akira scene, just taking the cover off the bike.
Starting point is 00:15:27 With the camera taking in the view of her naked body. I saw every part of her nude body, her breast, thighs, leg, and mostly her vagina. Mostly? Mostly. And mostly her vagina. It was massive. Wow. Wow, that's a big vagina.
Starting point is 00:15:43 The thing I noticed on her body is two things. Her erect nipple and her woman bush of a pussy. How she was able to keep one nipple erect and the other one soft. Amazing. I forgot to say my sister Stacy was present at the photo shoot, sitting down. Her, it was me. And my sister had clothes on. Roberta is standing there butt naked.
Starting point is 00:16:14 My sister also saw Roberta in the nude. They only think that Roberta was high heel. Wow, she hairy, said my sister Stacy out loud. Out loud? What are you talking about, honey, said Roberta. You're hairy, said Stacy, pointing at Roberta's hairy pussy. You're hairy. Okay, okay, let's get this photo shoot started, I said.
Starting point is 00:16:38 Is this like an ogre photo shoot? Then Roberta got into a sexy pose and I started snap away. They were also the women that help her here. Get ready. Those women were looking on as well. So on all their wear for women in the room, nothing but females in the room, staring at this naked woman posing on stage while the one woman behind the camera, me, snaping away.
Starting point is 00:17:10 Yes. Yes. Yes. Math doesn't work. Yeah, well, there's her, there's her sister, there's the model. And there's the women who helped with the cream. Which are all four of them.
Starting point is 00:17:24 Which are all women. They all speak in one Greek chorus. Roberta posed in such really sexy poses. She looked breathtaking. I have to say she looked amazing from head to toe. The more I started sniping, the more I admired her naked body. Light brown, gorgeous skin. In the jungle, the might might jungle the lion sleep tonight my sister stacy
Starting point is 00:17:48 saying teasing roberta about her woman bush vagina okay stacy that's enough honey said roberta then roberta started posing so gracefully showing us that gorgeous ass of hers. Nice butt, Roberta, said my sister Stacy. Why, thank you, honey, Roberta replied with a smile. Then the photo shot was over and Roberta came over and my
Starting point is 00:18:16 surprise completely naked towards me and thanked me for the photo shoot by huging me. Then a chorus I hugged her back. Share no problem, Roberta, I me. Then of course I hugged her back. Share no problem, Roberta. I replied. Then Roberta for some strange reason she took my hand, laid them on her
Starting point is 00:18:32 butt. Does sound challenging. Posted on July 4th, 2017. God bless America. Would you like to hear some more words from let's see, what is it? KD- KD-2000.
Starting point is 00:18:49 Would you like to hear some more words from KD-2000? Yes. Okay. Yeah. This user is no longer a member of Similar Worlds. Oh, I can still mute, block, or report them, though. That's great. What a woman bush vagina tease that is.
Starting point is 00:19:06 Come on. Oh, my God. Okay, so that was the first section that Secret Gage in 69 gave us. That section was called Fetishes. The next section is called Insanity. Boots, you seem to be a little bit angry. Is that right? Oh, boy, am I? am i yeah okay let me figure
Starting point is 00:19:27 out what i'm angry about your pick a pick a pocket tony 21 down yep that's what i am pick a pocket and pick a pocket tony 21 down yep yeah and I have something to say, and I want to make it perfectly clear. Yes, my mood is elder brother of Ruby Spa, brothels, Portland, Cotter, Mass. Zoom. How to gay, how to G or any way relate to Moore's rule, Hawk, Mistress, Uma, Mary, Khan, or any at all. Or any way relate to Morsrul Hawk Mistress Uma Mary Khan. Or any at all.
Starting point is 00:20:09 I don't give a fuck if she fucked. Obadul Islam, younger brother, Sirajul Islam for us, visa. Or the place, Casino's food tester, Mohammed for dinero, also totaled red Ford door car gore insurance scam.
Starting point is 00:20:29 Is this how you awaken the old gods? She is neighbor related to Mudler Khan, not for my family. She can fuck her, Jasmat Uslam, Raj Shashi, Bhagamat Hightower, Taliban terrorist cousin,
Starting point is 00:20:43 Mansur Muraman, as much she likes. Is this one of those Dada poems Taliban terrorist cousin man some more ramen as much she likes is this one of those Dada poems that the talking heads turn into a song personal identification information and Simpki inside trading by her daughter and Mrs. Sandra
Starting point is 00:20:59 Brown's back will send details of Peterson on Wall Street Journal she or a sad tulu jar not my family back. We'll send details of Peterson on Wall Street Journal. She or a sad Tulu jar. Not my family. I don't know why that was in the insanity category. You gotta stand up for yourself.
Starting point is 00:21:14 Sometimes you just gotta stand up for yourself. Pick a pocket, Tony. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So you have a dark side? Is that right? Oh, good. Yeah. Great. I have a dark side. I don't. But you do. The honor Louisiana hospitality. Mother of two.
Starting point is 00:21:29 1963. Bobby, you do now. Now I would like all smuggler of human genome science. Metamube inside traders. Stay away from my electronics. Keck Trinix. Go find the driver and Lusernir's provider of Vienna City, Mr. Radhid Chittagong and Mongolia best Fruend
Starting point is 00:21:54 and Sultana, his wife. And Jan Chowdhury's niece driving Saudi money Range Rover by Saudi Mitek comfort in go ask that Farzana Qudas Noreen odor black bends each dime were stolen
Starting point is 00:22:14 from public accounters HGS Inc well that section was as described thanks a lot secret agent 69 that definitely was insane. We're going to move into the psychics category. Frank West, tell yourself about you, please.
Starting point is 00:22:31 I still miss EP. I still miss EP. I am psychic, comma, spiritual. Look at things in a different way. If people understood these truths truths they would be a lot more careful sex equals sacred energy exchange exchange you didn't capitalize the x so that's cool okay you know what i'll walk with it's fine it's good acronym great yeah I mean it's gonna wrap together with the STD
Starting point is 00:23:07 sexually transmitted demons does that mean that they're sacred energy exchange transmitted demons yeah no shit oh no I'm trapped in my own acronyms.
Starting point is 00:23:30 The Kama Sutra is 26 volumes of books. It is not. It is. It says right here. Okay. Too bad the only one people paid any attention to was number seven sex that's like reading the chapter on brain surgery ignoring all the other science and medical tests i always thought of sex like brain surgery i've never tried either frankly they both scare me but that's okay
Starting point is 00:24:06 here is how the movie ends you run up sorry I yeah the Kama Sutra movie you know what it is part 7 in a 26 film series yes from the guys who brought you the Bhagavad Gita you run up all the mileage
Starting point is 00:24:26 you can on your vagina, just prove how liberated you are. You can't roll that odometer back. Just to prove how liberated you are and get your experience. Then when you get older,
Starting point is 00:24:42 you'll wonder why you are on antidepressants and sedatives just to get you through the day maybe even some therapy to help you along you'll be baffled as to why you're so screwed up you will puzzle puzzle over why your relationships go to shit then when you have kids you'll wonder why they're so screwed up. See how that works? No. Just think about it. And remind me, what group did you post this in?
Starting point is 00:25:11 I am psychic, comma, spiritual. Gotcha, gotcha. I am psychic, comma, spiritual, comma, don't have sex. Right. That's what that means. Oh, I thought it was have as much sex and then just be depressed later. Oh, okay. I mean, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:28 Yeah, me too. I'm going to vote for the me too. Yeah, maybe just have sex now because you're going to be depressed later either way, so fuck it. And then you just wonder why your kids are screwed up. This is just a plan. That's how it works. Lou,
Starting point is 00:25:44 very next post in this same category, the I am psychic, spiritual. This one has a giant 82 people. So, really big community. And let's see. Your name is Deluxe Edition.
Starting point is 00:26:00 My old neighbor, ever since I met him, I always knew there was something about him. He and his girlfriend made me feel welcome and settled at my new home with their graciousness and their kindness. He and I have spent a lot of time together as friends and friends only. But yesterday, me and him were hanging out and we got into a deep, deep discussion. He told me he sees the numbers too, and he reads about them and he knows what they mean. Basically, what he told me is that the numbers he sees tell him that he's here to show people
Starting point is 00:26:36 a new way of living and to spread joy and happiness. His numbers also encouraged him to be a teacher and to work with small children which was hilarious to me because i've seen him dealing with small children and he handled it so well he would be that's really funny then it's so funny yeah don't you see why it's funny because he he handled it well be a teacher and he was good at being a teacher. If you just listen to the numbers. Okay, okay, great. He would be excellent to do so.
Starting point is 00:27:13 I know a lot about the numbers, so he asked me some things about what various numbers meant, and he asked me what numbers I saw. What the fuck does that mean? What do numbers mean? Yeah, the numbers. The numbers. We're here to talk about numbers. Guys, come on. What's three, though? I'll talk to you later.
Starting point is 00:27:35 I told him he saw certain numbers when he did because he isn't in the profession that serves his highest purpose. I think we were supposed to have that meeting last night. I think it was very important that I told him the information in which I told him. You see, my numbers tell me
Starting point is 00:27:52 I'm a light worker and that I'm a teacher. Pretty light work, I bet. Yeah. I came here to spread my light and raise the vibration of the planet and show the earth people a new and more effective ways of doing things. I'm a role model for people to observe my life. And I affect a lot of people. I make a lot of people think and go, hmm.
Starting point is 00:28:28 Those are the things that make you go that's how he raises the vibration energy hmm yeah my job is to teach people how to become their greatest versions I am a guide I show people where they're supposed to be and help people align themselves with their higher selves
Starting point is 00:28:44 I work closely with the ascendant masters and theangels, and I came here with a purpose. So did you. What is it, I wonder? What is it, I wonder? The numbers will tell us! What is it you wonder? I am also curious. Hi. I affect a lot of people.
Starting point is 00:29:04 Is that Fernie? Hi. Yeah yeah it's me fernie hi i'm in the comments a role model for people to observe your life truly enlightened people just are they don't post it on a social site they just are are quietly enlightened. Oh, fuck. I want to see your food blog. At Fernie, we feel urged to talk about our likes and experiences so that people can see them and we can connect and enlighten one another
Starting point is 00:29:34 with discussions of our lives. At Deluxe Edition, we have studied Buddhism long enough, maybe longer than you have been on this earth. Maybe. To know that enlightened people just are, they don't broadcast it. They are humble in their teachings.
Starting point is 00:29:57 At Fernie, the question is my experiences in my posts. What is it that angers you about trying to explain the things I see from my personal perspective? I am not Buddhist. That is an assumption you have conjured. At Deluxe Edition, I feel absolutely no anger right now at all.
Starting point is 00:30:22 Oh my God, what are your feelings at root beer? at all. Oh my God, what are your feelings on root beer? If you attach anger to my words because you don't like them, then you have a long way to go before you become awake. Enlightened people don't leap into defensiveness like you just did.
Starting point is 00:30:43 You have a long way to go, kiddo. At Fernie, you are projecting onto me nothing you're trying to paint me as is accurate in any way. It's a projection of yourself. And the only reason we're having this conversation Wow, Fernie is doing amazing things to your the first place is because of your defensiveness. At Deluxe Edition, LOL projecting what? I defended myself against your incorrect accusation
Starting point is 00:31:19 that I was speaking to you in anger. Nothing could be further from the truth. I feel no animosity towards you. My point, last point, is you present yourself as some highly enlightened creature when you speak like a defensive little teenager. I'm done. At Fernie. Good. Bye'm done. At Fernie.
Starting point is 00:31:45 Good. Bye, lol. I don't know. It sounds like Fernie's got your number. Fernie's real good. Does Fernie just do this all over the time? I should have said goodbye lol 69 uh uh later on uh also in the uh psychic section uh is another group uh this group
Starting point is 00:32:14 uh specifically uh is called i am psychic it's got a whole 21 people in it oh uh ironic is what you got there my name is is Ewizo. Psychic Perception. On Monday, October 29th, 2018 at 11.49pm CST, I was watching the movie Beirut, and the image of an actor from a television show flashed in my mind. I knew I was about to see him. The scene changed, and there he was.
Starting point is 00:32:37 Psychic Perception. I knew him from the series Snowfall, where he played an Israeli drug dealer in 1980s Los Angeles. Some might assume something in the movie reminded me of him. However... Psychic perception. However, this was a psychic perception. The opening credits when his name showed up. So it was distinct from other kinds of cognition.
Starting point is 00:32:56 I knew I was about to see his face. He came to me like in a vision. This is how psychic perceptions differ from normal perception. A television. You are absolutely certain of what is about to happen in a pre-deja vu moment. Wait, what? Does that mean experiencing something for the first time?
Starting point is 00:33:15 You are an ascended master, I see. I'm getting the feeling that I'm about to experience something that will feel like I've experienced it before. It's something. I feel like I haven't experienced it before. Oh, it's so unfamiliar.
Starting point is 00:33:31 I stopped the movie and checked the Snowfall IMDb and there he was. The actor's name is Alan Aboudboul. He plays Avi in Snowfall and Ran-E-Niv in Beirut. I saw his face in my mind about 50-30 in the movie and he appeared at 50-40. It was like a quick little jog in the timeline. I could probably write up a dozen of these reports each day of my life if I stopped and paid attention.
Starting point is 00:33:51 The reason I don't do this is it triggers my psychic perception to become much stronger very quickly. I don't want to become dominated by it. I'm just too good at being psychic. I don't want to be too psychic. I was watching something where there was a guy who was typecast in this role and he just happened to be there again. I cannot believe
Starting point is 00:34:11 that Rocky Balboa is played by the same man eight times. Who writes this shit? I saw this man who was playing an Italian tough guy. It was Sylvester Stallone, which I expected it to be. Psychic perception is similar to genius
Starting point is 00:34:27 in that it is a ravenous force within the gifted person's brain. It drives more strongly than any other awareness within consciousness. It wants to devour all the person's attention. It wants the person to dedicate
Starting point is 00:34:37 every waking moment to its fruition. It's like an obsession or an extremely favored activity. It comes easily and feels natural. It is a hobby. No two psychics are alike. Their skills are unique and varied, and always changing, improving.
Starting point is 00:34:52 For some reason, I have a unique relationship with the timeline, or the time-space continuum. I have an ability to see the past in a way that is extremely anomalous and unique, which is a story for another day. Psychic perception. I have an ability to see the future in a way that is probably similar to other psychics. However, I have a unique relationship with the timeline.
Starting point is 00:35:13 I know that when we are in the present, the past and the future also exist simultaneously. Astrophysicists, please take note. That is a 60-year-old woman writing this. a 60 year old woman writing this so it's time for a little bit of a blast from the semi-recent past I don't actually remember what episode it was a
Starting point is 00:35:35 recent-ish episode that we covered this but do you remember the particular guy that had a fascination with being strangled by nerd thighs? Lemon, there is not a single day that has gone by that I don't think about nerd thigh Strangle Man. Okay, great.
Starting point is 00:35:53 Well, in that case, what you got there, Adam? I enjoy the thought of people dying from getting strangled by nerd thighs. Second perception. To be specific, I am turned on by the idea of nerdy men. The stereotypical skinny palakine with big glasses, etc., killing people by strangling them with their thighs. I have documented at least four cases of this occurring and involving the death of the victim.
Starting point is 00:36:39 The cases were in 1981, 2008, 2014, and 2015. Alright, we can catch this sicko. There's a pattern. Climate change is making it worse. In all of these cases, we knew that the thighs were nerdy? Yes.
Starting point is 00:36:59 They keep telling the media to not publicize the nerdy thigh murderers because it just encourages other people with nerdy thighs to go out strangling. We have a taste for it now. They've deregulated nerd thighs. Wait a minute. This thigh has a Harry Potter tattoo on it. You can see the impression here on her neck.
Starting point is 00:37:18 Oh, yeah. So far, the fifth case is yet to happen. I can't help hoping for it to happen soon which of course it will involve a person dying and when I mean strangulation I don't mean a wrestling hold their larynxes were crushed by the thigh muscles so they died from being unable to breathe and sustained heavy
Starting point is 00:37:45 bruising on their necks. I went so far as to read their autopsy reports to make sure. I'm very creeped out. You know, Lieutenant, retiring has been tough after 30 years
Starting point is 00:38:02 in the job. The one case we couldn't crack. The nerd thigh strangler I'm gonna hunt out on my own time the hammer pans over the shot of the door slowly opening nerdy thighs walk in it doesn't help that I every time I have heard about someone
Starting point is 00:38:23 being suffocated to death using thighs, a nerdy guy did it. Right, right. This makes me love nerds so much. A nerdy guy. Yes. Whenever I see a nerdy man, be it real or fictional or even a cartoon one, I'm not going to name any because all of them are my husbandos, LOL. It also helps if they are mean
Starting point is 00:38:50 and sadistic nerds. Oh, boy. You know who I thought was the hottest guy in Greece? Oh. The nerd. Oh, I thought you meant ancient Greece. I feel really excited and constantly look at their thighs,
Starting point is 00:39:18 respecting them, and imagining myself to have my larynx slowly crushed like a boa constrictor. Oh, no! The prophecy is coming true! ...in the back of my neck. And his ankles are twisted and locked tight every time I... Oh, no! The thighs are giving him a tracheotomy!
Starting point is 00:39:38 It helps, but I don't tire until I die from suffocation and there's nothing I can do to stop it. Oh, the irony. He typed it as he was dying. Got any clues, Chief? Yeah. Nothing.
Starting point is 00:39:55 So, Adam, that post that you had, the post, I enjoy the thought of people dying from getting strangled by nerd thighs. What was the title? What was the category? What category did you put that in? Health. Health. And poster of that, Willie the Wiz, how's your account doing?
Starting point is 00:40:25 Well, let me take a look. Oh, this user is no longer a member of SimilarWorlds. Interesting. I do like sign me up for that his comment, just because he really nailed this guy. He wrote,
Starting point is 00:40:40 he's homo for nerds. Happened when his father touched him using protractors, and mom watched. I guess that would be homo, becauses. Happened when his father touched him using protractors and mom watched. I guess that would be homo because if you were a nerd and then the other one was a nerd. Yeah, okay. What do you got there?
Starting point is 00:40:57 So that was a guy by the name of Willie the Wiz who of course has been banned. We'll miss Willie the Wiz very much so I guess we're just going to have to go to this completely different thread by Meredith Richard Leslie yeah man get a load of that last guy right
Starting point is 00:41:14 anyway I'm Meredith Richard Leslie so I just got back from my drug trip and I had the most amazing adventure oh this sounds fun I can see why you posted this in the miscellaneous section. I'm still tripping a little
Starting point is 00:41:30 bit, but I just had the most amazing adventure. On drugs. On drugs! Can you believe it? I did hallucinogenics! I hope you don't say what you took. I did hallucinogenics!
Starting point is 00:41:43 I hope you don't say what you took. Drugs. I said drugs. You ever reenacted Raiders of the Lost Ark on NyQuil? It would be truly a misdeed of me if I had not informed my compadres of my grand experience. Oh, fuck you. Oh, and that's us. Okay. Let me just adjust my fedora. See, my old doctor,
Starting point is 00:42:14 Dr. Carlson, got fired, and now he's a bum living off the street. But... Is this in the trip, or is this actually what happened to Dr. Carlson? But good old Carlson offered me some good shit last Friday, and he was giving me the willies, so I ended up taking his entire stash so we could
Starting point is 00:42:29 have my broken off-white leather Ikea office swivel chair that I so unfortunately broke while masturbating to pictures of Bill Gates. Oh, I see, I see. So doctor in that sense. Is this QAnon satire?
Starting point is 00:42:48 Maybe? What a handsome devil. That Bill Gates. Billy. I decided to take it, and 20 minutes later, I felt like nothing was happening. You're definitely not saying what you took. That's great. I took it.
Starting point is 00:43:04 The drugs. The drugs. The stuff, man. The drugs that made him out of a drug trip. His entire stash. It was something a doctor gave him. I took his whole stash, and I took it. In exchange for a broken chair. I felt so depressed and alone in a dark pit in my soul.
Starting point is 00:43:20 I went to bed, and suddenly I felt something warm moving towards me. It was a nerd! A naked one in all of his skinny, pale completely hairless creamy glory That is what nerds look like, yep Skinny, pale
Starting point is 00:43:39 Creamy Good skin That's what you usually expect out of nerds it was actually a nematode it's a common tree frog those are links I'd love to get strangled by
Starting point is 00:43:58 I gasped in awe when I felt a hand push itself against my mouth and nose his nails digging into my tender flesh. He whispered into my ear, his horn-rimmed glasses being barely visible on my peripheral. Okay, so he was naked
Starting point is 00:44:14 except for the Lisa Loeb glasses? This is Lisa Loeb. Don't force it, dear. Just let it happen. What? That was when I knew he was in full authority of me. Nobody revolts against a nerd and gets away with it, I thought. No, I think most people do, like, all the time. Like, daily.
Starting point is 00:44:37 Haven't you seen Revenge of the Nerds, Lemon? Or possibly Revenge of the Nerds 2? Everybody, clap your hands. I didn't realize this was mildly adult. Just mildly. He gave me a pair of handcuffs and that's when I handcuffed my own hands using my newfound telekinetic powers.
Starting point is 00:44:59 I'm on drugs, remember. You may have forgotten. All of them. The stash. This is the weed from zapped or like from some sort of he pushed my forward and began stroking my neck
Starting point is 00:45:18 and back commenting how smooth and oh so delicate my neck really was you're so good with my forward i was having an epiphany in my darkest hours and my most colorful of dreams yes it was god in nerd form god's back I felt his firm yet somewhat soft thighs begin to crush my neck as I could do literally nothing to stop it. His telekinetic powers overpowered my feeble ones tighter and tighter.
Starting point is 00:45:59 His thighs blackened my neck as I screamed out in both pain and orgasm. Blood shot out my mouth as my trachea was shattered. What? What? Huh. What? It's an advanced strangling. It's really good.
Starting point is 00:46:18 These is God's thighs. Are there more than one people on the internet that's just like, nerd thighs, yes, that's my thing. Yes. Why? How? It's plausible that this is a bunch of different people, but I like to think that there was one person who posted everywhere and a handful of followers who were like, yeah, okay. This does sound like a good fetish. I'll sign up. The Jesus of nerd thighs. It's just so distributed like it's everywhere but not
Starting point is 00:46:45 concentrated in any one place it's really weird and they don't write the same like like every nerd thigh strangle story looks it's written slightly differently yes which is well the original one was very very specifically about the uh the warden from Super Chill. Yeah. Blood shot out my mouth as my trachea was shattered, forcing itself out from my pursed lips. And leaving red and splotches on my bedsheets and towards his feet. Frank, is this your new metal song now? With the pursed lips, I'm just picturing like Bugs Bunny in a statue pose ripped up his hair
Starting point is 00:47:27 not that it bothered him this was how he gained power I gasped and gasped it was no use I desperately writhed as asphyxiation progressed but found that I was being drowned by the nerd's cum that
Starting point is 00:47:46 was churning out like a faucet. Where did the... There's cum in here now? It was churning out like a faucet. No, a waterfall. Churning, huh? Well, it's a nerd cum. It's different. I need...
Starting point is 00:48:01 I hope someone draws a visual of this because the idea of the thighs Lou there's literally only one person I can think of who would draw this who is it? It's you it's you
Starting point is 00:48:17 I'll have to think about it Lou I will send you $20 if you send me that image just send it to 4northidesonly at gmail.com. Thank you. An impossibly continuous waterfall of nerd cum mockingly
Starting point is 00:48:37 masked my purple-tinted face in a white, sticky, ever-so-gooey hodgepodge of delicious nerdlet cream of only the utmost, finest quality. Come on down to NerdCom Farms! Quality Com. Quality Com. It wasn't until long that I found myself floating in a world...
Starting point is 00:49:01 That much cum. There's just so much cum. In a world. That much cum. There's just so much cum. In a world where every living person is a nerd or a nerd's thigh walking on its own legs. What? What? What a beautiful world.
Starting point is 00:49:14 There are legs. Where the thighs have legs. And the cum, it turns. It looks like. Okay, that's the drawing I want to see. Thighs with their own legs. Yeah, pony up another 20. Frank West's drawing, it's private.
Starting point is 00:49:33 Yeah, you want to see, you pay me. If somebody draws it, I'll pay Frank West 20 bucks. Can I stand by this? I'm gonna share this with my friend who's actually an artist. I'm gonna have to make that email, huh? Anyway, so that seems like a pretty gross post.
Starting point is 00:50:03 I'm sure you're probably done at this point. Legs of lamb, chicken thighs, and a nerd who ruled them all. Hmm. That's when I heard yelling. Oh, the yelling. It was murder for my ears. It was my alarm.
Starting point is 00:50:19 In my bewildered state, I had drunkenly come upon the realization that I'd been tripping out for a good seven hours, and my bedsheets were stained with gratuitous amounts of cum, vomit, and I pissed in shit all over my laptop. Good. Drugs, I'm telling you. That was not on the bed. And somehow that made this post.
Starting point is 00:50:38 Are you not done? Oh, no. I'm typing on this before the keyboard shorts out. Oh no. I'm typing on this before the keyboard shorts out. Let me tell you, it was completely fucking worth it. 10 out of 10 will consult Dr. Carlson again. Now to clean up all the cum, shit, piss, and vomit all over my room.
Starting point is 00:50:59 I am a new man. Wait, is this a Yelp review? Imagine the drugs you could get if you traded a working chair, though. He wants pre-broken only. He's down on his luck now that he's a street bum. Experience five out of five stars. Delivery three out of five.
Starting point is 00:51:17 A little late. Who'd you masturbate to do in this chair? Steve Jobs. More of a Microsoft guy. Hey, the intern. Yes? Coming up to the end of this episode here, but I do have a choice for you.
Starting point is 00:51:34 I do have a choice for you. And coming up on the end. We're not quite at the end, but I do have a choice for you. And that choice is one of the following three things. One is called fed up with husband's constantarting, Also While We're Eating. That's by Brass Monkey. The Funky Monkey? Yeah, that's the Funky Monkey.
Starting point is 00:51:55 Yep. Then there's the group I Am A Witch, as opposed by Sour Pennies. Yes. All right. All right. Fantastic. Then your name is Sour Pennies, and you are a witch. How old this witch? This witch is between 26 and 30.
Starting point is 00:52:13 Oh, okay, well, that's not a reach. All right, let me just... You think you play it? All right. Yeah, I think I could do that particular voice. Yeah, I think I could do that particular voice. Okay. About two weeks ago, I performed a ritual that was a mix of a spell for beauty and shapeshifting.
Starting point is 00:52:43 Or rather, I borrowed ideas from each to make a ritual that was more closely aligned with my needs. I had to take a flower and place it on the surface of some water in a cup, flanked by- Is this like a class project? Flanked by candles. This forms the major physical component of the beauty spell. Water, flower, cup.
Starting point is 00:53:04 My spin on this part was to choose the dried flower that always looked vaguely like a pouch to me because I could attach it more readily to my genitalia and therefore my body. Oh, that is part of your body, yep since And since desire is a huge component of beauty for me, that was a good move.
Starting point is 00:53:33 Nice. The other part was the mental and oral part. I asked for Lilith's magic and that I asked for Lilith's magic and that let's pronounce McGick I asked for Lilith's McGick and that of my ancestors
Starting point is 00:53:49 to be imbued into the process of creating beauty and coursing it through me the beauty I invoked was a connection to my body and my desires to see beauty in myself and the world and to use that
Starting point is 00:54:07 as a streamline between the two to make a seamless connection between my body and the world. So I thought- You can start off with a coarse beauty, but you eventually want to move into a fine grain beauty to really just like get into a nice luster. So I thought about my body and the things I find beautiful in the world, a desire and sexual energy, and wouldn't you know it?
Starting point is 00:54:32 Wouldn't you know it? I managed to get myself into a meditative trance. Oh, okay. Yep. Ain't it always the way? This is where shit got real. And where the shape shifting component came
Starting point is 00:54:47 in. I realized I had a lot of good vibes going through me and I was feeling it physically. So I started to envision embodying myself with Lilith's energy
Starting point is 00:55:03 and the beauty being transferred into me. And I saw my body literally transforming into something else like a succubus image that I associated with her. I felt the sensation of wings stretching out of me. Horns piercing out of my forehead. And becoming erect and my fangs becoming more intense and my body becoming
Starting point is 00:55:34 crystallized. The horns pierced out of your forehead, but they started flaccid? Good flaccid horns piercing out of your forehead? Yes! And changing through various colors and changing shape more generally to suit the new creature form.
Starting point is 00:55:52 It's the first time since reviving my practice that I felt wholly absorbed into a ritual and gotten a lot out of it. Praise Lilith, mother of the void. AF plus. Lemon, yeah. What's up? It's time for poetry!
Starting point is 00:56:16 Yay! So, Adam, this first poem that we have here, this is a poem that was posted to the group, I Saw a Bug. Seven people have seen a bug and want to share their personal stories, including this poet. My name is Joyful Silence. And this is my poem. Hey, little bug.
Starting point is 00:56:53 Stop bugging me. Little bug buzzes around my screen. I think it really wants to be seen. Hey, get your own website, little one. Go to where the bugs have fun. This site is for human chats, not a site for little gnats. You better fly away fast. This site will make you aghast. Close your compound
Starting point is 00:57:26 eyes so you will see no lies. Curl up your feathered antennae. Curl up your feathered antennae. Escape while you can, little guy. Sigh.
Starting point is 00:57:46 Hey, sigh uh hey uh frank west uh you got a you got a poem to uh share here is it a contradiction i have yes uh i don't know i don't know you tell me you tell me what your poem is contradiction by extant one how do you think it feels your love and fascination of contradiction knowing what only i can know
Starting point is 00:58:09 watching you time and again dawn the nightshade lipstick breathing in the aromas of life dedicated to defense mechanism honed to near perfection protecting you from darkness preparing you for the darkest of nights yes our days are filled with such majesty but that has never and will never be the die that truly binds you are the living sacrifice to something else something that binds you without rope or chain love or hate irrelevant
Starting point is 00:58:42 there is no defense you've always known at some point your place is upon the altar. Naked. Prepared only to do my bidding. You can dress it up, make it easier to rationalize,
Starting point is 00:58:59 find a way for the mind to accept, but the bottom line is still the bottom line. Everything. A contradiction. In 350 episodes or so, we have yet to read anybody who can spell that altar correctly. Ever. Not a one. Ever once.
Starting point is 00:59:20 Hey, I also have a dark side. Oh, yeah? Cool. That sounds cool. I'm Nightc dark side. Oh, yeah? Cool. That sounds cool. I'm Nightcrawler. Awesome. Awesome. He puts on the mask no longer.
Starting point is 00:59:31 Trapped, forgets all the sad jumps into the magical land of the strange and weird. Deranged, no fear, bloody rains and ears, freaks. Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! reigns in ears freaks yeah yeah yeah surround a mental clown licking brains are lost but never found the mind is
Starting point is 00:59:53 brilliant escape design and control your own fate dark and mysterious unpredictability and serious awkward silence gives me a thrilling guidance of defiance. Fuck science eats your eyelids. Helicon ate my cell phone.
Starting point is 01:00:16 People say that M&M's gone downhill, but I don't see him, man. Shit. So good. No, he's equally as good as he was. He's exactly his quality. This doesn't restart slam poetry. I don't know what it is. Tense.
Starting point is 01:00:29 It's real. I posted this in the group. I like poetry because I like poetry. That's cool, man. I like poetry too, dude. My name is Fair Futra. I think. poetry too, dude. My name's Fair Futra.
Starting point is 01:00:44 I think. Called whiner we's howln, o'er mere in our mountain, and wild we's the surge on the dark rolling sea. When I met Haboot Daybreak upon a young lassie,
Starting point is 01:00:59 while I skid to the road in the miles Ty Dundee. Was that good? Was that secretly good? I don't know. It seems like an anecdote. It might be good. Like, I can't make fun of it. I don't know how. There's
Starting point is 01:01:22 so many people. I'm just looking through this particular community. There's so many people that'm just looking through this particular community there's so many people that just posted I like poetry I like poetry I like poetry I like poetry what did we learn from any of this F plus that I
Starting point is 01:01:39 like poetry that's nice did you like this poetry no well then you like poetry yes this proves that this proves out yeah i learned the nerd thigh killer is out there and he's dropping hints he wants to be caught nerd thighs end lives man yeah yeah like like nerd thighs crushing people to death is a phenomenon so do you think like there's been there's been uh a
Starting point is 01:02:08 couple of sort of like uh you know sort of zeitgeisty sort of things that the f plus discovered before they kind of went mainstream and all of them have been awful do you think we're going to be the first ones to like really break the story of nerds and then and then like five years from now we're like we knew about nerd thighs yeah I'm sure it's gonna be a big twitter thing within two months vice explainer for nerd thighs okay
Starting point is 01:02:33 nerd thighs went viral on twitter this week here's what you need to know what's a vox piece alright fantastic I look forward to you not being able to summarize anything nerd thighs are strangling men and we are here for it 12 Disney princesses
Starting point is 01:03:00 I'm reimag imagined as nerd thighs. I will also pay Frank $20 if you draw that. Wow. Wow. This is going to be an expensive episode. Not for me. For what it's worth, our first foray into nerd thighs was episode 327. Boots Founding.
Starting point is 01:03:25 We had it bookmarked, I guess. The intern sending you a thing she just drew, Lemon. Ooh, acceptance! I might be sending Frank West 20 bucks right now. Yeah, Frank West. Yeah, you might be sending your Venmo open. Something makes me sentimental. Yay!
Starting point is 01:03:45 Can I share this? Yes, please. Frank, what's your PayPal email address? This is... I mean, I think gold on black, intern? What do you think? I'm not the print expert.
Starting point is 01:04:00 I mean, it's... I mean... What? I mean, that's, uh... I mean... What? I mean... I mean, that's pretty perfect. All right. That's very strange. Corn room glasses.
Starting point is 01:04:17 That's all it needs. Three, that's... The torso is a thigh with thighs and legs coming out of the... The thighs have legs. The thighs have thighs. I forget the deets.
Starting point is 01:04:36 Sorry. The thighs have it. I can make adjustments. Yeah, no, no. It's like I will put that on a shirt. Our website is always chfpl.us forums ball pit
Starting point is 01:04:53 and how do I how do I play boots? I want to play I want to play a game. How fun do you want the game to be? Well, not like really fun.
Starting point is 01:05:08 You don't want to go to extremelyfun.com? No. But also, I don't want the game. I want to play a game, but I don't want the game to be unfun. That doesn't sound good. Okay, let's... So, kinda.fun is a website. And it's kind of fun.
Starting point is 01:05:25 Alright, great. Bye. Bye. Hey, Boots. Boots, just so we have it recorded at some point, you're looking at that list, right? I want to share 10 things about me. Yeah, yeah. Can you just read number six for me? Sure, yeah, I'll read number six.
Starting point is 01:05:52 I love wearing flowers in my fur. They make me feel pretty. Thank you. I like to talk to other guinea piggies around the world. I like to talk to other guinea piggies around the world. I watched its monitoring for play guinea piggy magazine in the 1980s. I'm not very proud of that. I don't read it for the articles. I just chew it up to make a nest.
Starting point is 01:06:27 Quay guinea piggy. That's very bad. I love to eat carrots.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.