The F Plus - 49: Reno Iz Drest In A Kostoom

Episode Date: May 27, 2011

Poorly constructed news reports and badly writen books will often speak about the "digital lives" that the anonymity of the internet afford us all. In the world of a MUCK (or multi-user chat kingdom), players can create an artificial personality and then use it to have artificial sex with other artificial personalities. And if that already sounds gross, it's gonna get worse when you're dealiing with people who have no idea how the female body works. This week, the F Plus finds new uses for the heart shaped box.

I have found the best description of all time. You'll like it. All right. Fantastic. I just posted it. Reno is dressed in a costume. Wait, can Reno is dressed in a costume be the title of the episode? Yes. Oh, yes.

Hey there, welcome to the F Plus Podcast. Terrible things, red with enthusiasm. My name's Lemon. I'm Macy Alcalado. So, Lemon, ever heard of a mush? A what? Oh, a mud? A muse?

What? What are you talking about? You huge nerd. What are you trying to tell me? Do you ever play role-playing games? Not that often, to tell you the truth. You know, get some of your friends together, get some dice and some Cheetos or whatever,

and pretend to be... Mostly in the games where you build roller coasters. Well, you know, you've heard of people who play D&D and the rest of that junk, I'm guessing. I mostly have, yeah. Or the vampires or furry werewolves or whatever. Sure, sure, sure. Well, so there's some people who really want to play these games so badly, but they can't even find people to play with it in person.

So they go online and they play these games. Okay, okay. I'm following you. So like, yeah. So like, but like text adventures, right? Yeah, yeah. It's like, it's because it's like this, it just dates back to like 1990 or

something before the internet barely even existed we're talking like telma and the rest of that so it's all words it's all text and this has the advantage where people who have very poor ideas of what people even look like try to pretend to be what their idea of uh prettiness might be oh that's oh that sounds sounds terrific. All right. Show me your links here. Well, I've got something for you right here, but I gotta warn you, man. Some of these people are not really well

socialized. Well, that's unusual for F Plus Subject Matter. Oh, I'm sure. So it looks like what we have here is descriptions of role-playing characters that have sex with other role-playing characters? Yeah, that's pretty much it. Fantastic.

Let's get to our readers. In the room tonight, we have Acer Aquatol. Just we, the reader, named Acer Aquatol. Boots right here. Flynn kneels on the bed above you, wearing nothing but a smile, and without even a stitch of clothing as he looks down at you.

Yes, Fahan? Guys, look into something, some description called Oxy, trust me. Come quats up. No way, I'm trying to calculate my breast to body weight ratio. Jack sticks. Her breasts are an overly large, a lush 34C cup with all the perkiness of youth. Oh, is that all?

Cortex. Cortex has green eyes that are orange. She's wearing buckles that look like tits. Tonight's guest reader, Zarla Shinenza. Between here head and here rumps, he has stacked a centipede serving of arms

Exactly a hundred pairs not one more or less Wow And I'm in with huge tits A surreal, dangerous beauty magnifies the exotic, magnetic presence and appeal of the youth of God before you. Eyes, the shade of deepest sapphire diamonds. Diamonds do not work that way. HP just called me. He says he wants his adjectives back. Her onyx is ruby.

With a hint of sparkling brilliant violet. What? It's all colors! This diamond makes me angry! Oh, well, hang on. Don't worry, there's no more colors, right, Tomquat? And gold surrounding the irises.

Capture the intelligence, wisdom, and childlike innocence of the teens' artistically soft, angelic, heart-shaped features. I think he'll keep one feature in mind when he was writing this.

She's just a woman made of hearts. Golden, blonde waves of luscious, lovingly silken locks. Rokoto? Yeah! We found bread!

Cascade down in svelte pools? What? Cascades. The pools have been keeping trim. Against the small of her back to end at the very tip of her slender hips and just above the crest of her firm bottom. Her features are soft with baby, cute, cheeks, small,

perfectly rounded ears, nice lips, easy, easy chin. Oh, yeah. Your chin is loose, harlot. Not like your spilt hair. Button nose and a fair brow. She's frosty. She's frosty. Standing at a picture-perfect height of 5'4", and weighing a feather-light 100 pounds, the young girl before you seems to be the model of beatific image.

What? Yeah. Really? All saints I know look like that. A slender neck trickles. Fucking water feathers. Does it sound healthy? Is this girl like made of ice or something?

Everything is either trickling or cascading. I think this girl might actually be a snowman, Lemon. Yeah. On down to slim shoulders, delicate arms, and small, soft, dainty hands. Her chest is ample-sized,

full, and heavy, yet firmly set. So she's completely skinny in all ways. She's really emaciated. She's under 100 pounds. However, she totally has huge tits, too. A small, feminine waistline portrays her unique stature.

As well as accompanied with a flat, well-toned six-pack for abs. No, because muscle doesn't have any weight, right? So huge hips and a lot of muscle means that she wouldn't weigh anything. Hey, what's up, abs? This six-pack's for you. Her clothes are about three sizes too big, starting with her head. Her head is three sizes too big? She's got this giant top hat that just covers her.

She's got this giant top hat that just covers Wait, wait On, which on top she wears an old, dusty black top hat that's seen better days Wait, so there is actually a big scene that is actually a top hat

God damn it, ain't this girl I had not read ahead to the top hat. God damn it. I hate this girl. I had not read ahead to the top hat. Oh my god. That means she is a she's a snowman then. Rusty huge tits.

It all comes together. He was born on an army back from the same mix as game was born from. He was their new tribe to make a supper killer. What? He was their new tribe to make a supper killer. I don't know what the problem is. I hate you so much. He was there, new try, to make a supper killer. I don't know what the problem is. He let it down you. I hate you so much.

Banana forest! He worked out better the game. He was trained to do the job and did it. He worked hard day and night for the first 16 years of his life. Though the army desolate, he was not needed no more and let him go. He left the base and the army desided, he was not need no more and let him go. He left the base and the army behind

and started to use what pay he got from the army and hit real big in the stock market. He came here and stay with his older bother and feel in love with his bother wife. He was planning to kill game but did not have to since game got himself killed.

He is a lot nicer and a lot better in contour of his rage. This man is so cool to rage most of the time. Wow. And then he's a bother. That was great. It was wife's a bother. Yeah, but he became a bother.

But he fell in love with a bother wife. Yeah, he did feel in love with a bother wife. Yeah, he did feel in love with a bother wife. Cass, Kaylee, presents herself as a very delightful, beautiful, and elegant young woman. Her long, wavy hair, light platinum ash blonde with pink highlights, nearly clear like a refreshing waterfall, reaches to her mid-back. like a refreshing waterfall, reaches to her mid-back. Her very light, crystal blue eyes are almost totally clear, taking on the color of the ambient light as it glistens across her

intricate and delightful face. Full of love and joy. I think I see your brain in there. If your eyes are clear, then you're an albino and they look red because it's the blood in the back of your eye. Also, we have semicolon. Yes!

Oh, you gotta class this up. Full of love and joy, ever so lightly dusted with the faintest brush of light freckles across her nose, it's the only description of freckles you ever see, which has a small yet very beautiful emerald stud piercing on the left.

Also a common thing, it seems. An intricate stream of interwoven Celtic lines form a double helix pattern, beginning at the small of her back and expanding while moving upwards towards her shoulders. Reaching her shoulder blades, the stream breaks off into four separate interwoven streams, two at her left and two at her right, each in perfect symmetry. Mastered the semicolon, but missed a period there. Two of the streams, one on each side, head down the sides of her torso, leaving her lower abdomen and continuing all the way to her toes.

The remaining two, one on each side, wrap around under her arms and over her breasts, then head downward and merge at a beautiful emerald stud which is embedded in her navel. Oh, her navel! Wow, that's unusually classy for these people. I'm trying to picture this and I'm just getting dizzy and drunk. I'm thinking she's like Spider-Man or something. That's her attack.

She's like a zebra. Oh, the tattoo. Oh, my head. She looks to be fairly petite and is very thin. What a shock. Although extremely well endowed. What a shock. Wait, a skinny girl with big tits?

All right, I guess. I've never seen any of those. She stands at around five feet six inches tall. Although obviously much of that is due to her stiletto high-heeled boots. Her boots have been cured of all ailments. You would place her weight at no more than 110 pounds, though probably a good 30 pounds of that is due

to her large butt. Wow! What? Almost one-third. Yeah, one-third of her body weight approximately. What about the lovely wheelbarrow she uses? I have a condition. Stop staring.

Elephantitis of the tits. No, that's pronounced elephant titties. I'm sorry, how old is she? She seems to be around 25 or so years of age. Whatever. But she's not telling. 20 years of that is in her breast. Let's talk about her clothes, you guys.

I feel girly now. Tell me about the clothes. She is wearing a stylish yet very tiny soft black leather skirt by Talbots. Over her shoulders, though unzipped, is a matching soft black leather jacket, likely of Italian make. I already use the only brand I've heard of. No brand name for that one. Who cares?

A beautiful golden cross can be seen draped between her very large 38F. Shapely do drop breasts, which are barely covered by a very 38F shapely dewdrop breasts, which are barely covered by a very skimpy aqua V-shaped halter top

that leaves lower abdomen fully visable. If you have 38F breasts, everything you wear is skimpy. I'm assuming, well, it says dewdrop, I'm assuming like it's a very literal like dewdrop shape like only one dot of it is actually connected to

her upper body I'm assuming more than that this is actually probably the word you're looking for wait we still need to talk about her jewelry oh good she has beautiful 24k gold loop rings goes through each of her nipples at her navel is an exquisite two-carat diamond stud.

On her feet are jet black six-inch stiletto high heels, which, though aesthetically perfects the outfit, she can barely walk in. Oh, shit. That says it all right there. By the way, she is smoking a long-cloved cigarette that smells like lilac incense instead of cloves. That's good information, but I can't remember if you told us about her breasts.

Oh, right. And I don't want to leave this out because it's very important that you know this. Kesset Shapely, again, do drop breasts are very large, 38F. They weigh about 30 degrees Fahrenheit. Underline seven times. 38F. They weigh about degrees Fahrenheit. Underline seven times. Giant. He had to write it twice because he needed Kleenexes to clean up partway through.

I just imagine them behaving like those clown punching bags. And like... You know, my titties wobble, but they don't fall down. They weigh about 15 pounds each and collectively weigh about 30 pounds. I really want you to remember this.

What? Wow, I'm really glad that math got done for me there. As this is about 27% of her total body weight, you might give pause to whether or not this is a natural development or rather a surgical one beautiful 24k gold loop rings she is she is wearing two sets of boots and two studs in her navel and this guy is losing track of his own description no he's not because her breasts are about 30 pounds that's very important i like how the description ended with now you might think this track of his own description. No, he's not, because her breasts are about 30 pounds.

They're a dewdrop shape, but that's very important. I like how the description ended with, now you might think this sounds outlandish, and my answer to that is shut up. I'm just going to raise the question. She might think this is outlandish, and she has nipple rings. Anyway. I found what I want to do. All right, what do you want to do?

It's before you as a giant of a man. No, no, no. No, no. It is before you. I'm sorry. You're right. You're right. You're right. Okay.

Oh, my God. Okay. Yes. right, you're right. Okay. Oh my god. Okay. Yes? Before you is a gaint of a man. He stands somewhere near none feet tall. He's somewhere between

zero inches tall and 7,000 feet tall. Somewhere in the proximity of not any height at all. Yeah, it's Schrodinger's Gate. It's around zero.'s a round zero. This is so hard. Every sentence of this.

I'd take it over, but you know. No, no, no. You did it. You gotta do this. Yeah, let me make you start first. When he walks, you can think. He sees for miles. He has long jet black hair

that flows down his back to his knees. Right now, he had it done up in a ponytail. When you find Lee looks at his huge arms, the first thing that comes to your mind is tanks.

Yeah, definitely. And there are bigger men's legs. What? Sure, yeah. Why don't you look down at his legs? Yeah. The end. You could pass out as the looks like trees.

My God, it's got trees. The look like trees. When you note how his body looks, you think he has to be some kind of robot made out of metal. But from the tan to his skin, you know that cannot be. You can't paint robots, apparently.

The next thing you see he has on is a black t-shirt. It looks to be made out of silk, as the logo of open tag, born to Raz Hell, on the front of it. On his feet. open tag born to Raz Hell on the front of it.

On his feet is a pair of old-looking biker boots. Which is a proper noun. They're black and made out of real leather with the paints are toke into. I can't even... they're black and made out of real leather with the paints are toke into

I can't even what is that even supposed to be with the pants are tucked into the boots oh okay he didn't know what the form of tuck was so he just and he didn't know what the form of pants was

with the paints are toke into I don't understand where he's getting lost here And it didn't know what the form of pants was, I'm guessing. Yeah, with the paints. With the paints, our token, too. I don't see what your problem is. Yeah, I don't understand where he's getting lost here. In all, when you see this man, you think he is a demon. Oh. I realized something just now. I'm not that bad of a writer.

But I thought it was like, but I was looking at that man and I thought tanks wow yay for gains gains for gains officers cap rest on her head with silver rank. Okay. Sorry, anime voice.

I love it. The brim of the hat sits low on her head, covering the top of her black silky ringlets that fall down her back, stopping just above her sweet, firm ass. Attemptress of the First Order, she walked right out of someone's biker fantasy. Maybe mine! ass. Attemptress of the first order. She walked right out of someone's biker fantasy.

Maybe mine. My friends. I don't think there's any chance of that, sir. Charcoal brows arch over white brown eyes that smolder with lust. All the time. 100% of the time she's smolder with lust. All the time. 100% of the time,

she's smoldering with lust. Cleaning the toilet, smoldering with lust. High cheekbones and a pert nose rest above a pair of full luscious red lips that look like they spent hours around a man's cock. That man's probably really annoyed. Is that a difficult look to pull off?

Ooh I just dipped his dick in red paint That man's really annoyed It's like, look bitch, I came Get off already I wanna go to the bathroom We're going to go to the camp Tight leather jacket restrains a pair of large round breasts rise up

from her chest. Rise from your chest. Rise from your chest. These size T beauties press up against the silver zipper on the right side. Both of them? She's like a flounder.

Both of them? She's like a flounder. Long graceful arms tapered down to delicate hands with long musician's fingers that ache to wrap around a man's cock. I'm sensing a theme here. Just got nice boots that ache to be on a man's cock. She has a nice personality for a man's cock. Her curves invert into an impossibly small waistline that carries on an M-wide leather belt.

Full, round hips are constrained in black leather hot pants that flare out, connecting to a pair of great legs that make up most of her 5'10 frame. As she turns around, you see a perfect little cherry ass. Around a man's cock. Well, it's better than it being around a woman's cock, come to think of it. Small petite feet are adorned with a pair of four-inch

black leather boots complete the slut package. Around a man's cock. Madam, can I interest you in the entire slut package? Standing at about six foot three inches, this young man is quite striking. His features are aristocratic, clearly European, almost French, but not quite Portuguese.

How does that work? He's Belgian. That's almost French, but not quite. That's exactly right. Precisely right. That's exactly right. Precisely right. His cheekbones are high and are accentuated with a thin nose that leads into

a pair of full, lush lips. He's sucking on his nose at all times. His face carries an oval shape. You see, he set a spoon on his nose. I didn't say which form the oval was. He might be Ernie, he might be Bert, but he's... I just thought there's like this little hand that comes off his cheekbone. It's actually holding like a circle.

I'm just totally picturing him sucking on his own nose all the time. His face carries an oval shape and is set upon a neck that, while not slender, is not bulky either. That's a lot of words to say. It's a neck. Wearing a black skin-tight shirt, Predator cuts an attractive and stylish

figure. The pants Moron wears. What? What is Predator? His name is Predator Moron, apparently. Or Moron Predator, one of the two. The pants Moron wears are held up on his hips by a plain leather belt and fit tightly along his rear and thighs before being tucked into the top of his knee-high boots.

This young man seems to have a certain kind of animal presence. Maybe it is the way he moves, perhaps the tone of his voice. Whatever it is, Predator gives the impression of a civilized Predator. Or a moron. We can't tell.

Use his old spice. old spice. You see a winged wolf morph in the nude. Her fur color is gunship gray on the top and bottom. Her tail is long bushy with a black tip on the end. Her nipples are flat black. Her color of eyes dark red. Her hair is flat black. Her bust 92 centimeters.

Weight 66 centimeters. My God! Holy shit! Hips, 83 centimeters, height, 183 centimeters, weight, 66 kilograms. Her wings are very large to carry her. Her legs are sex.

Oh, wow. That's an R. Kelly song in the making. Her legs are sex. Her legs are sex. Such an evocative image. She has a will work out, Bobi. You can see her puss. As she grits at you.

As she's looking at you. As she's showing her teeth. What? Wow. What happened to that sentence? She has a will work out, but you can see her puss.

Hold on, guys. I'm going to type in the following letters. I-N-V, enter. Carrying rat and bow tai chi. Holy shit. She's so scared. Carrying taitenbo Tai Chi. Holy shit. She's also carrying Tai Chi. Button.

This fur is a Chinese language teacher at St. Mary's School for Wayward Furs. Oh. What? Oh, she's wearing a button that says that. Sure. Small necklaces. A heart-shaped pendant reads, to you with all my heart. And it just ends button

I hate furries who idle more 30 sec during sex what hate to don't we all I think that person has that button in real life I hate when I'm fucking a girl and then she goes idle

if you're gonna idle more than 30 seconds The person has that button in real life. I hate when I'm fucking a girl and she goes idle. If you're going to idle more than 30 seconds during sex, you need to turn off your engine. Shia. Shia is an enigma. Both very exotic and often elusive. Shia is a wild card. In her presence, people usually feel as if they don't know what she will do next. But whatever it is, it'll be drastic and noteworthy.

Shia has a spurt that will not die. She knows her own mystery and uses it to her advantage. She is not that easily intimidated and frightened, having been exposed to many strange things. Also, in her eyes, men are playthings. Especially dangerous men.

The ones that wish to possess her and make her theirs, she plays with them like fire, daring and chancing that she will get burned. As to what she looks like, I have no idea. She's really

cool, though. She's so mysterious. Huge breasts. She has gigantic breasts and a tiny waist. And stiletto heels. And probably pierced nipples. And cerulean eyes. It changed with her mood.

Okay. A lithe young girl, her features delicate, skin utterly pale, but for a dusting of freckles across her snubbed nose. She's a pug. She's a pug. Blah blah blah. Her eyes are the dominant feature of her face. Jade green, overshadowed by thick, dark red lashes that are slightly enhanced with a rubbing of coal from nearby mines.

Yeah. Giving her a waif-like impression. Oh, yes, this coal. That comes from, yeah, nearby us. That was a good vintage, that coal. I only rub coal on my lashes. That's local coal. She has miner's eyes. Do not rub your lashes with imported coal. Go to the 100 mile coal diet, then.

Right. Think globally, locally. She can never have, every time she looks at a canary, it just keels over. She can never have a... Every time she looks at a canary, it just keels over. Oh, God. Her lips are full and lush, begging to be kissed. A deep, rich crimson.

No, shut up, Jack. This is sexy. High cheekbones overshadow her skin, giving her an almost regal look. Perhaps her father was a nobleman that raped her mother! Girl! I bet your father was a nobleman that raped her mother. Girl, I bet your father was a nobleman who raped her mother. Why are we

speculating in the character description? It's a very judgmental mud. Pass the judgment on your heritage. Perhaps? You created her. You don't have to say perhaps. Let's throw it out there

and see what people think about it. Raise her mother to create the girl. In a lab, I guess. Even though her Gaelic roots are clearly visible. That presupposes any rape. Yeah.

You raped like a Gaelic fuck. She was from Gaelic and or rape. I don't know. She wears no makeup, no distraction from her face. Her hair is deep. I thought she was wearing the kohl. That's not makeup. That's kohl, though.

Yeah, that's kohl. She's not going to sell that and put on makeup. Just stuck her face in a grill and... Her hair is a deep red, almost violet, because red, dark red is violet. Her hair is one color, almost another color.

I saw an anime recently and they had purple hair, so I decided to throw that in too. Thick wavy tresses hanging down to her waist. Cut blunt there, the entire mass swinging with each step that she takes. Almost ellipses. Her body is

trim, yet an hourglass figure, full breast tipped by dark nipples. She's got Hershey Kiss boobs or something? She's got the milk dud nipples. Okay, okay, she's got red hair. What do her nipples look like? Come on!

Almost violet. Oh, baby, your nipples match your hair. Each nipple is pierced by bright red gold rings that are engraved with... Yeah runes, somehow designating her lineage. These here are rape rings. My left nipple tells the story of my nobleman father. My right nipple tells the story of my nobleman father. My right nipple tells the story of how he raped my mom.

Do they? All right. In case that guy is pregnant, here's the nipple rings you should give to your daughter. Baby. Right. Well, the thing is, it doesn't even tell a story because it says never before seen by public eye until now

so wow I feel privileged her breasts are pushed high by the corset she wears so her breasts are pushed so high she's got I don't think her corset's working properly I can't get rid of the broken breasts in your face like this

yeah it's pulled to her neck. I wonder if she has a small waist. Hmm. Maybe. Her waist, tiny. Oh! Flaring out into supple hips

as it had been trained by a corset from a very early age. Her waist. If she's got a tiny waist, huge tits, and supple hips, why does she bother wearing a corset in the first place? Because that's what girls wear, and a girl totally wrote this. You're right. Totally.

The corset is a dusky shade of gray, each string pulled taut, barely allowing for breath Because women who can't breathe are sexy The bone stays accentuated by black seed pearls This is very authentic It is Is that a corset term or something? Keep going, keep going, keep going

Under the bottom edge of the corset Her cunt lips are clearly Back up, back up You need to do that sentence again We need to hear this clearly bottom edge of the corset. Her cunt lips are clearly visible. Back up. Back up. You need to do that sentence again. Yes. We need to hear this clearly. Yeah. Back up and take two.

I'm going to say this as clearly as possible. Yeah. Under the edge of the corset, her cunt lips are clearly visible. Pale and poised with a dusting of deep red curls. This girl's almost violet. Predominantly cheese curls like the kind this guy's been wearing. Oh, but wait.

Did you wonder if there was more? Did you wonder if there was more? Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Her clit is pierced with a gold ring. The etching on it matching the symbols on her nipple rings. Oh, that makes sense. Grubbing between her folds as she moves.

Oh, my gosh! Wait, wait. Oh! What does that do? What does that do? Oh, you want to know what that sort of is? It's causing a constant moisture. A sensuous glitter that begs to be used.

Oh, my gosh! Is this just walking around? your essential glitter that begs to be used. Is this just walking on water? No. Holy shit. So that's why that other girl was all watery. Just standing under this one. Keep going, keep going, keep going.

Her hips are slim, but womanly. Curved out from her waist and flowing down into long, slender legs, standing a mere 5'4". Find my center, go to my happy place. Her perfect peach of an ass

subtly rounded and firm the cheeks slightly dimpled oh you know who wrote this Nelly aside from the corset she wears ankle high boots the heels about four inches

adding a bit to her height and showing off her long slender legs to perfection the calves softly rounded yet muscular normally hidden under the peasant's garb of her people laughter laughter that's the peasant scarf of her people holy shit

and the slip and slide and let the word go out through the land all women shall wear corset and nothing else may her cunt bring the rains and a good harvest for some reason the peasants aren't getting much work done across her slender shoulders

she wears a velvet cloak. Her only protection from the elements. Oh, that's true. She's fucking stupid and doesn't know how clothes work. Well, the cloak isn't protecting her from her begging moisture, though. It protects her from the elements,

not from rapists. It's always a good day when she's around oh god wow also there's oh wait there's an extra note here fuck you for making me read that if I Darnia stands before you

reveling in here new glory she stands over ten feet tall now having grown at least a foot in here latest transformation here proportions though

didn't remain nearly the same here muscles why do you keep doing that how is this some sort of like specific gender yes yes yes here that is a that is the that's a hermaphrodite pronoun. Oh, we're in for one of those. Okay. Here muscles, if possible, seem even more defined, even stronger. Standing out from here body and evidencing incredible extreme strength. That's not how you write a sentence. Here female attributes have swollen as well. here female attributes have swollen as well here breasts tripling in size until they fight for space even on here newly transplanted chest each of them the size of basketballs large erect nipples stand at the end of these orbs thick and filled with here milk which drips slowly off them. Oh, good.

I'm glad this is happening. Nothing unusual so far. Keep going. Traveling fervor down here, buddy. I don't know if I want to know. No, let's know more. Let's not go there. Let's find out what happens.

What's lower with her body? Jack grabs the back of Boots' head and just smushes his face into... Here, change is more than physical. It is sexual. That's shocking. For where fear was simply a female pussy once, fear is now an impressive cock standing out and straight.

Thick as her wrist and as long as her forearm. He's getting excited. Put up fires. Underneath are two balls that stretch down towards the ground. Build with here come waiting to explode. Ouch. You know what? I'm going to say this isn't as bad as I expected. ground. Build with here come waiting to explode. Ouch. I'm going to say this isn't as bad as I expected.

You can get that treated, though. Indeed, the sheath is covered slickly with here pre-come, which has already escaped the head of the monster. Boo, do you want to take that back now? There is nary an orifice that is not leaking constantly.

A lot of action going on in this. Fighting for space on the chest, you know, just waiting to explode, escaping monsters. Here ain't no slick species constantly. Here the pigs are very long and sleek, muscles apparent in their lines as she stands there, tapping the ground with claws that easily break through whatever is there. There are claws coming out of her legs?

You don't want to invite them over to your marble stairway. Right. So I know that Tarnia looks like a gigantic tit, a huge cock, and some claws on her feet. A tall lioness of about 15 years. She stands a tall six feet, at least tall for her age. Her pretty face shows off a nice bone structure, big eyes, and thick red lips, occasionally showing off something metal between them.

Her slurred speech soon finds explanation in a rather overly large barbell piercing through her tongue. Currently, she is wearing a white blouse, the fabric straining over her huge, heavy tits. We've got big tits.

Due to the strain on the blouse, it is about to pop at the buttons, allowing you to look in through the spaces between the buttons. Another effect of the tightness is the clear visibility of her nipples and pancake sized, which is all one word, pancake sized

Oriala. Is that how you... cake-sized, which is all one word. Pancake-sized. Oriola. Is that how you... You're the Northern Lights. Oh, okay. So beautiful this time of night. This would also indicate that she isn't wearing a bra. Worsening this effect. It's tragic, really.

It's the outline of two rather large and thick nipple rings protruding against the already taut fabric. Both look to be about the size of a bracelet. She wears a gray blazer over his.

He's got a gray blazer and she wears it over it. Right. Yeah, that makes sense. She wears a grey blazer over his but it hardly masks anything as it cannot be closed over her obscene chest. Looking lower, you see a short grey pleated shirt

covering her ass, often being lifted by her tail. As that happens, you see a flash of pink, which on closer inspection turns out to be a bright, shocking neon pink thong. Oh, phew. All right. Which is already deep in her ass cleft, parting the meat of her big ass cheeks.

Oh, shit. I have to keep... Okay. Keep going. I'm not going to puke. This little pink string does... I don't think it's going to get grosser. Okay, I'm sure.

I mean, how could it get worse from here? What could possibly go wrong? Well, let's find out. This little pink string does little to cover up her asshole, which for some reason looks exceedingly loose. A big fist-sized hole. Is it fist-shaped as well?

Slightly obstructed by the thin pink string in front of it. This was the first attempt at doing the English channel, I guess. One wonders what stretched that particular hole so wide. I don't! One does? I'm assuming it's Merkle the Drippy Dragon. I'm going to note that the next sentence does not

begin a new paragraph. Her shoes are low black sneakers. Low black sneakers, how tasteless. Oh, man. Her hair she keeps in a high ponytail, bound together with a bright red band. he is six feet tall with tossed brown hair wavy and a few inches long and a dark brown eyes his face kind of matches his shy personality his romantic approach to relationships his body is fairly muscled and toned but not so. I think I know where this is going. He's wearing cargo shorts and skate shoes. What no one realizes

is he has two secrets. He's an amputee, and he has breasts. What? Cesarla, Cesarla, I'd like to know. Is that where you thought this was going? That's exactly where I thought it was going. It happens all the time.

Nobody realizes he's an amputee. Buffy is a human-sized endomorphic cigarette. He has a brown filter and a long white body. He wears a pair of really cool sunglasses and always smiles. His huge cock is also a cigarette. Of course.

And I've just frozen right here in horror. Go on. And his bed constantly relieves puffs of smoke, especially when he is angry or horny. It is quite charming. And he has a likable raspy voice. That's the best description so far. Where did you get that from?

Cyber Hitler stands tall and proud, his refurbished body rippling with powerful artificial muscles. His electronic eyes emit a powerful malign red glow which covers anyone he turns his piercing gaze upon. He wears a new uniform, a suit of grey armor that is covered

in spikes and guns. His head is topped by a helmet with a single blade rising high. The best nature documentary ever. Cyber Hitler. Oh, yeah. Cyber Hitler and Puffy

are going to clean the streets of crime. I've thrown in a link to one. It's in French, and I will read it in French if you like. Oh, dear. All right, go ahead. Go ahead. It's a girl rouse. That hair is a reddish orange that evokes the sun.

There are short and two braids stand on his head. His face is round and her cheeks are a little girl recoupitant freckle. Her eyes are a bright green and sparkling with light. Her luscious lips are naturally red. Her little nose and round and can roll up. Cassiopeia is 14. She is very pretty

in the uniform of college whores. It sounds like you're asking people to donate money to her. Cassiopeia. We're just pennies a day. Or is she proud to go? Her white blouse is transparent. Wait, it's... Okay.

I think he means translucent. Nope. Transparent. That's what the original French said, transparent. Blouse is invisible. Short sleeves and theouse is invisible. Short sleeves and the collar is small. Thus, one can see her necklace or a whore's name is included.

Her blouse is a button that does the farm in which her breasts overflowing. They are very firm, a bit pear-shaped, with small nipples well fall. Scottish skirt, checkered blue and red, is attached under its belly. It is pleated and very short. One can easily

see her sex-covered d. short. One can easily see her sex covered D. I'm sorry, this is the best translator I could afford. A fine down red 2. The lips of her young vagina are clearly visible. Sentence perfectly

translated. That is a disturbingly accurately translated sentence. His bare buttocks are exposed. They are perfectly round and attracts the eye. Silk stockings white mold his legs

at mid-thigh and Jartel, whose tapes out from under her skirt la satache. She has shoes, shoes, black four-inch heel. It is hoisted on its feet after the model perfectly by firming his thighs. It's like it starts kind of good and then just goes insane at the end. qui modèlent parfaitement ses cuisses en les renfermissant.

It's like it starts kind of good and it just goes insane at the end. The Ayatollah's speeches are getting a little weird lately. I wanted to, Jack, if you wanted to just tell me a little bit about Dion. Sure. Dion, there is no possible way to mistake this man for an attractive person all right then see what you think of jack jesus i feel like you're trying to tell me something here but considering the rest of, that really is flipping the script. There simply isn't a delicate, smooth, or pleasant part to him. He is shaved bald, which is probably just for convenience. There is no way, with the heavy scarring over his face and scalp, that he could ever grow a full, normal head of hair. Okay.

Okay. His face looks as though, at one point, it was shoved into some machinery. Or perhaps mauled by an animal. Or perhaps dragged behind a truck on a gravel road. Or carefully and randomly sliced with rather vicious serrated knives. Can I direct this guy to my... Exact same kind of wounds. Almost.

Exact same kind of wounds. Can I direct this guy to my OkCupid profile. He has huge tits! Whatever the cause, the scars crisscross over his cheeks and temples and scalp, tugging one corner of his mouth into a little forever smirk to the left side. Okay. His obvious eastern heritage is still apparent in the epicanthic

folds, the shape of his face, and the deep, dark color of his eyes. So far, Dion is the only person out of all these people that I want to have a beer with. That's the first time I've seen epicanthic written. That's interesting. What the hell, Kumquat?

What the fuck? Oh my god. Goddammit, Kumquat. Goddammit. Well, this can be the last one, right? You didn't expect by having Kumquat in the podcast. I just want to read this one sentence, not from the head, but just

Lenea is a crystalline dragon, a very rare creature that was conceived from incestuous breeding. That's very important. Thanks, Portax. Yay! That just gets ya. Alright, can I just do the first paragraph of this? If you're gonna start it, you have to do the last sentence.

All right. I'm just saying. Yeah, just read it, Lemon. All right. Beauty. Grace. Seduction. Allure. This woman is stunning as only a vixen could be. Well, she was in 1925 anyway. This centenarian vixen used to entertain the troops as a pinup girl in World War I.

In World War II, she was a MILF. By Vietnam, she was a propaganda tool for the enemy. And by the time Gulf War II rolled around, she was one of those WMDs they couldn't seem to find. And still she perseveres, thinking she's still got it. Lucky you. Is this supposed to be like they think she is still sexy? She thinks she's still sexy. Lucky you that she thinks she's still sexy.

She's got cataracts. that she thinks she's still sexy. She's got cataracts. Those are hot. Long, lustrous raven hair has long since turned tattered and ragged with age. The color faded to a gray so light that it is now almost light blue. Nobody in this community knows how colors work. Of course, with dye being all the rage, she's content with with that But she doesn't actually dye her hair

Because we just said it was grey But anyway She dyed it grey, stupid One jade green eye has grown cloudy With a cataract The other is still bright and clear Though oddly enough She always seems to stare in one direction

And one direction alone And that direction is motherfucking east that's it so if she turns around and faces the opposite direction her eye she just rolls back she looks at a specific place called Deez Nuts her eye is

gyroscopically stabilized the fine elegant angles of her face and muzzle she's a literal vixen The fine, elegant angles of her face and muzzle. What? She's a literal vixen. She's an actual vixen. She's a fox furry. Damn it.

You're probably right, aren't you? I am right. She has a muzzle. Muzzle, yeah. Either that or she's... Anyway, shut up. So her face and muzzle have grown slack and gaunt with time, only adding to the subtle

if former beauty of this former bombshell's face. Whatever beauty that was there, however, is long, long gone, replaced by a look of having one foot in the grave. A five-foot-eleven

frame now only stands four-foot-eleven. She was hit with a shrink ray, apparently. a 5 foot 11 frame now only stands 4 foot 11 she was hit with a shrink ray apparently no it's bone density hunched over as she normally is her navy blue flapper dress was all

the rage when I did research about the 1920s I mean in the age of vaudeville when women totally dress as fla was all the rage when I did research about the 1920s. I mean, in the age of vaudeville, when women totally dress as flappers all the time, she still thinks it's plenty risque, considering how much leg she shows, about six inches

of her calves for those playing the home game. The home game of furry buck, the home game? This is the home game. You stay home and you play online games. They're on full display, too. Rust and gray fur

where it should be red ad white in true vixen fashion. God damn it. Wow. Sorry. I was holding out. Like many older furs, she uses a walker to

hobble about. But most don't carry a load of sex toys in the basket. Actually, I don't know about that. Well, you know, having never met any older furs, I haven't got much of a statistical analysis to work from. Ace here, you and I are going to Anthrocon this year.

Huh? You and I are going to Anthrocon this year. All right, then. Let's do it. Jack doesn't even need a costume. Ouch. You guys could get a sponsor from Paxil because you're going to need a lot of I got a little more for you here which is that it's about time

that something more catches your eye That navy blue dress shifts for a moment bunching around her thigh Could it be this vixen is more than just a she?

Ah! She does. She does seem to have some Viagra in her walker cart. Of course she does. I gotta say that all this is making me really wistful for such simple basic things as vagina dentata.

Oh god. this is making me really wistful for such simple basic things as vagina dentata. Remember the first half of the episode? Wasn't that such an innocent time? It was really easy to be sane. We were just reading about moody goth chicks. Giant tits. And there we go. An hour or so of nerdy, nerdy, nerdy sex fantasies.

So let me ask you a minute. Did you learn anything from this? Yeah, I did. I did. Which is that, you know, when you read these pieces one after another and people, you know, describing what we would assume to be like their perfect woman. And and you you come across the phrase fist size asshole. That you can read that phrase and still think this next one, I don't think i want to read like that's too gross like you know internet perversion obviously there's no there's no such thing as to as like there's no bottom to it it's all like and and it's amazing like yeah it's amazing how furry specifically like have

they they're always trying to top themselves, and I wish they wouldn't. I was going to say, for once, I think the furries did not have... God, I still can't even get my mind around some of that stuff. I think in this one time, the furries themselves were trumped. That's true! That's true. I usually blame the furries on taking

it to maximum perversion. But the ones that were the worst in these cases were the ones that weren't actually you know, that had skin. The secret amputee. The secret amputee was fantastic. The website is always thefpl.us

By the time you're hearing this, maybe I still have stickers. You can find out by emailing me on the website is always T H E F P L dot U S. Um, by the time you're hearing this, maybe I still have stickers. You can find out by emailing me, uh, on the website. Uh, and until next time, we'll see ya.

Good night. Thanks for sticking with it. All right. So now here's what's going to happen. We're going to try to edit this where we have Acer talking in French, which then gets turned down. And then we have the simulcast English translation happening at the same time. Oh, so it's like a Quebecois TV show.

Right, yeah. It's like Iron Chef, only it's Iron Ring Figure Pussy. Kubi-san! Her tits are very large! It brings back memories. Wow, they are very large. Oh, wow.

Sound just like it. Oh, it seems like you really like big tits. Yes, yes, definitely. Well, yes, so it seems she's pierced her nipples with a Celtic rune. Celtic runes are so pretty. I love Celtic runes are so pretty. I love Celtic. Oh, and the surprise component for today is nether lips. We could do a whole episode on that.