The F Plus - 7: (Point To Schlong)

Episode Date: November 18, 2009

This week, we read the work of pick up artists and the seduction community, a thing made popular by Mystery and other likeminded douchebags with stupid hats. Using their methods (as well as a gen...erous amount of acronyms) you too can learn how to hate women almost as much as you hate yourself.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Excuse me, but what a good is all the violence in the world. Unless it is tempered with limitless sex, bring on the limitless sex object. And allow me, sex executioner genius, to explain the seriousness of the subject. Now if you'll all attend to my words, you'll see I'm a naughty fellow! In fact, I'm certainly not too merry now. I've come to this place to rearrange your face. Excellent.
Starting point is 00:00:51 Hey there. Welcome to the F Plus Podcast, where sometimes it's hard to feel the fiction. My name's Lemon. And I'm John. And this is a subject that we've held back on for a little while. This is something that we've just been waiting for the right moment. Now is the time. Now we're going to strike. This is the seduction community, something you're probably familiar with. And it's, well, what is it here? Well, it's a whole group of guys that just, they play the game, as they call it. And the game is picking up women.
Starting point is 00:01:23 Yeah, it's a thing of, I mean, it's something that's been around forever of this idea of, you know, pickup artists near Lotharios, you know, those comic book things like how to hypnotize women from the 50s.
Starting point is 00:01:34 And this is the newer, more creepy internet version of it with a lot of acronyms. Right. Yeah, the thing is, you know, the original idea you probably have in your head is a typical, you know, guy in a leisure shoot with a martini doing the bad one-liners.
Starting point is 00:01:49 What they've done is on the internet, they've taken that whole idea and they've made it sound like a D&D campaign. And there's all the acronyms. There's all these leveling ups and what level this girl is a hot babe or whatever. And it just, it all plays out like when they say say the game, they actually mean they're playing a game. I mean, it's experience points and loot dropping away from just being World of Warcraft. It's looking at male-female sexual relationships
Starting point is 00:02:16 as a aggressor- foe relationship. Like, this is the girl who won't have sex with you, and so she is your enemy. So you need to do different attacks and spells in order to win. To level up in your sexual exploits.
Starting point is 00:02:38 It's really quite horrible. They use a lot of acronyms as part part of their because as as as boots said it's actually it's like starcraft um so so they use a lot of acronyms we're gonna real quick just run through a couple of these just so you're just so you're familiar going in so there's pu so yeah pu that's basically a pickup artist it can also be puUA. That's basically a pickup artist. Pretty simple. Sure. IOI? That is basically an indicator of interest. It's a sign or signal that the chick
Starting point is 00:03:12 wants to bring this to a different level. Sure. Anything outside of running, screaming out of the room is an indicator of interest. There's DHV. DHV is a display of high value whether from like her to you or you to her that's showing that you're of a higher value it's it's leveling up in
Starting point is 00:03:32 a sense it's a big thing it's a big thing you have to show that you're a high value male and that you're the best guy in the room uh keno keno um geez it's it's a weird acronym but basically what it means is you always have to be touching the girl you're trying to rope in like it stands for kinesthetic approach which i guess makes sense but you need to be touching them and stroking the side of her arm and doing that all the time which is you know very sexy and not creepy at all for a stranger to just randomly touch. No, no. Women love when strangers touch them all the time. And then finally, and probably the biggest thing in the seduction community pickup artist
Starting point is 00:04:15 world is negging. Yeah. Neg or neg hit. It's basically they define it as a negative remark towards a girl designed to break her indifference to you by showing her that you are indifferent to her beauty. Not an insult, but you'd kind of be hard to tell. It's basically like making little comments and making little digs on the girl, and that will make her like you more because who doesn't like to be berated at all times, I guess. Sure.
Starting point is 00:04:40 But, you know, it's kind of like the whole idea of teasing, but brought to a new level. Like one of the examples they gave was, oh, hey, look how your nose wrinkles when you laugh. What's up with that? Imagine doing that the whole night in about every one of your personal aspects. That's negative. And that's effective. There is no shortage of crazy and no shortage of appalling figures coming
Starting point is 00:05:03 through in this reading. Not in our readers, of course. I'm talking about our subject material. We're going to get into introductions, and let's get down into it. All right, enjoy. Tonight in the room, we have Ace Rockawaddle. Hey, ladies.
Starting point is 00:05:16 Point to Sean. Boots Rain here. I'm not just going to play the game. I'm going to change the rules. Jim L2? Fuck this shit. John? Point to reader. Squiddy McConway?
Starting point is 00:05:30 Hey. Hazy Conspiracy? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Isfahan? Stay alpha, bro. Victor Laszlo? I've got one-itis. And Lemon. Hi there. I've got one-itis. And Lemon.
Starting point is 00:05:46 Hi there. Sarging is... I'm not actually sure what the definition is. The act of explicitly going out and picking up women using pickup and seduction techniques. Yeah. So this is a story of sarging gone wrong. Smoothie. Two days of sarging didn't go too well.
Starting point is 00:06:36 Field report of two days of sarging. Day one was at a music event. There wasn't many people there, and this was my first real-time sarging. I opened a two-set with, hey guy, I need a female opinion. I stacked all my routines and has a great 20-minute conversation.
Starting point is 00:06:56 I didn't attempt A2 or A3 as I was just practicing and opening in A1. Sure, you wouldn't want to get ahead. Yeah, you've got to get A1 down. Right. You've got to A1 before you can A1. Sure, you wouldn't want to, you know, get ahead. Yeah, you gotta get A1 down. Right. You gotta A1 before you can A2. You gotta level up.
Starting point is 00:07:11 Ding! A2. Is this some kind of... It's a steak sauce, though, right? Yeah, he was practicing on opening A1. Sometimes, like, the steak sauce will stick, and so you can't really open it. It gets crusted around the cap.
Starting point is 00:07:28 Nothing ruins a pickup. I think if the steak sauce comes out too soon, I think it kind of ruins everything. Nothing ruins a pickup like trying to ask for help opening a bottle of steak sauce. You can't have the barbecue man pop without the barbecue sauce. That's correct.
Starting point is 00:07:47 Day two was at a fair. I made two approaches. Approach number one. Smooth. Hey, can I have a female opinion, please? HB. Okay. Crossed arms, giving me a fuck-off look.
Starting point is 00:08:03 Smooth. Well, me and my friends are having this debate who lies more guys or girls HB guys still giving me nothing smooth oh really why HB because guys are dicks
Starting point is 00:08:20 smooth okay then by this time I lost all confidence and was getting pissed off with They're dicks. Smooth. Okay, then. By this time, I lost all confidence and was getting pissed off with the power of her bitch shield. As if to say, seriously, fuck off. See ya. And I walked off. I approached over my shoulder.
Starting point is 00:08:39 I don't think I smiled, and I looked and was very nervous. This may be why. You approached over your shoulder? At least you're acrobatic. I don't even know how that would work. His smooth phasers were no match for her bitch shield. Approach two. Smooth.
Starting point is 00:09:02 Nice big smile walking past two set of HBs. Must have been 8.5 slash nines. I had good body language and said, hey, can I have a female opinion, please? HB1 looks the other way. HB2. Erm. Nah. And they walked off very quickly.
Starting point is 00:09:21 I think this was them being shy and in a hurry, maybe. But it was not a good experience and took a great knock in confidence. Advice would be appreciated. So they run away and one of them says no. And it's like, oh, they're shy. They're not completely creeped out.
Starting point is 00:09:38 They can't handle my masculinity. Maybe it's because he walked up backwards looking over his shoulder. He approached from over his shoulder. Maybe he's thinking like a video game, like third-person view. What's that move from the Ninja Gaiden arcade game where you can jump up and do a flip
Starting point is 00:09:55 and then you grab them by the head and then toss them while you're... I know exactly what you're talking about. So somebody was throwing him at the ladies, which is why they weren't terribly receptive. I use that move all the time at the club. That exact one. Okay, this is clutch.
Starting point is 00:10:12 Well, I see what you did wrong, but don't let it be a blow to your confidence. First off, I'm not sure about the first set of babes. What was their HB rating? But you said the second checks of chicks were 8 or 9s? That means pretty friggin' attractive. Now, let's look at what type of openers you used. You used opinion openers, which would work very, very well for HB 1 through 7s.
Starting point is 00:10:39 However... Wait, can I pause just to explain what HB is? HB is Hot Babe. It's a hot bitch, also. Can I pause just to explain what HB is? HB is hot babe. It's a hot bitch also. And it's followed by a number, which is the classic girl rating between 1 and 10. Although HBs are a minimum of 7 by their chart.
Starting point is 00:10:59 Well, yeah. And you'll see that pretty much every time someone refers to picking up an HB, they say seven in these, which probably means four. Yeah, you don't want your fellow P-ways thinking you're going after lightweight stuff. Actually, no, I was reading threads where there were guys who were specifically trying to pick up HB like threes and 4s to have practice. It really is
Starting point is 00:11:30 like leveling up, isn't it? Man, I was just practicing. You pick up the ugly chicks, and then you learn how to level up and pick up the more beautiful chicks. I love that all of these read like a StarCraft FAQ. Yeah, they really do.
Starting point is 00:11:46 Right. And he can't give any advice because he doesn't know what the HB rating is. Right. It's not like you were really creepy. It's, what was their HB rating? You know, you forgot to tell us. Well, you know, different enemies require different attacks. However, for HB8s and above,
Starting point is 00:12:03 they're used to guys coming up with gentle conversation opinion openers all the time so with girls at this level like h8 and above you need something a little spicier i mean you need a spicier intro for a spicier level of girl next time try a neg first off or something really funny um conversational opinion openers are good, but not for really hot girls. They need something with a bit more edge. They don't have opinions. I'm too pretty to think. Like, if that first hot babe was wearing heels, you could have walked past her making no eye contact,
Starting point is 00:12:41 and then suddenly looked at her like you just noticed her and made a funny slash asshole comment about her. For example, if she was wearing heels, you could say, so without those heels, what are you, like, two feet tall?
Starting point is 00:13:01 But keep up the sarging, man. Nigs. Negs. So effective. Yeah. Nothing makes her jump her bones faster than telling her she's probably short. You used lame joke.
Starting point is 00:13:17 It's super effective. You used insulting comment. She loves it. I think the idea is to lower their self-esteem, to drop them to your standard. Oh, you thought you were too good for me. Turns out you're two feet tall. All right, day one.
Starting point is 00:13:41 Okay, just because you don't know what to do, don't reject so fast. I'm going to go through this also. What I'm going to start doing is keeping the conversation going until I know for a fact that you're a sincere individual. Every bitch has a little girl inside. Okay, approach two. Never ask. Hey, can I have a female opinion, please? No.
Starting point is 00:14:13 Let me get your guy's opinion. Yes. Hi, something had been really bothering me. Go into opener. Okay. Asking and saying please comes off as needy. Tell him you, bro. Thank you so much, Bruce Bruce.
Starting point is 00:14:29 Don't forget. Hey, don't forget his signature there. Keep it fucking simple, stupid. Keep it fucking simple, stupid. Yeah, I like how that ruins the acronym of that. Yeah, and he needlessly complicated it with another word. Yeah, the first day on day one, it wasn't a problem of running out of material, but I got into the LJBF zone. In day two, I wish I caught that girl on her shit,
Starting point is 00:14:57 because I would have really liked to see what happened. And the third approach, yeah, I think I fucked up, because I opened with me like this. Yeah, so they were walking one way and I was walking the other. I would have gone slightly in front slash next to them. Yeah, blocked their path. By so far, smiley face.
Starting point is 00:15:19 Just jump right in front of their way. Can I ask you guys a question? Okay, with moving sets, you never approach while moving in the opposite direction. Their momentum alone will get you rejected every time. Honestly, even I... That's just physics.
Starting point is 00:15:38 An object in motion will never fuck you. Honestly, even I can only have success with sets moving in the other direction only maybe 5% of the time, and usually they're HB 7.5s, or less. Now, Clutch
Starting point is 00:15:58 makes a strange point. HB 1-7s hook easily with the pinion openers, but if you build social proof, HBs 8-11 will hook on them. It's much easier to hook 1-7 because they don't have the same I-get-hit-on-every-night mindset. But it doesn't mean that the Turbo Hotties
Starting point is 00:16:16 can't be hooked with opinion. Turbo Hotties. Turbo Hotties. Oh, no! There is disagreement within the community. You just have to be very alpha with your approach and your body language. If you want to get the hotter ones, open at least four sets prior to entering theirs. Build the social proof.
Starting point is 00:16:39 As soon as you drop the opener, throw in the false time constraint and the backstory. Oh, yeah. Wait for the answer. Neg the target based on her answer. Run a few routines. Keep negging the target. Then try to move the target away from the group. But keep it within the eyesight of the group.
Starting point is 00:17:02 Run a couple DHV stories and routines. Move her again, but somewhere further of the group, run a couple DHV stories and routines, move her again, but somewhere further from the group. Remember, two moves equals a bounce. Oh. There should be a mnemonic for that. His story is like, yeah, so I got a really nice watch.
Starting point is 00:17:18 I have a nice watch. Oh, I like your nice watch. Yeah, I bet you do, because you're a dumb bitch. That's how you neg them, right? Right. Yeah, that's a DHV cancelled into a neg for 33%
Starting point is 00:17:32 chipping damage. Did anybody read what Nedge or Nedge hit? Neg hit? I did. I think it's Mathological Questions. It's exactly what Jim's first bit was. Yeah, you bust a girl down a little bit so that her self-esteem is not in a full-on defensive mode, I guess.
Starting point is 00:17:52 I don't know. You don't insult her, though. You just insult her. Yeah, you don't insult her. You just are insulting to her. It's an implied insult, but it's not an overt one. It's like they explain here, those are interesting nails. Are they real?
Starting point is 00:18:09 It's really cute how your nose wiggles when you talk. Look, there it goes again, Chuckle. There's such a fine line between being a douchebag and an asshole. No, there's not. These are doucheholes. This is a post by Ezo. It is entitled... Oh So this is a post by Ezo. It is entitled...
Starting point is 00:18:26 Oh, this is by the way a forum called Lay Reports, where members of the seduction community will get laid and then they immediately run home to the internet to write the story about how they got laid.
Starting point is 00:18:42 Because they're not sad, is the point. They're probably in the bed, on the laptop. Quickest F-Close ever. I haven't posted any of my field reports in a while, and finally decided to share this one with you guys. You may call it an improvised game, freestyling, social proof,
Starting point is 00:19:03 or whatever, but it was not, in fact, anything more than inner game that got me the girl. The facts. Ezo. HB8. Kiss clothes in 20 seconds. Full clothes
Starting point is 00:19:19 in 3 minutes. Scenario. Wait, wait. Folklose is sex, right? Yeah, yeah. Folklose is sex. Is that when he finished?
Starting point is 00:19:33 Probably, yes. Because that's how fucking fast he is and how good he is at the game. All right. Scenario. A party. I knew a few people and I introduced them to each other center of attention
Starting point is 00:19:46 social proof pre-selection opener hey looks like your friend is having fun tell her to moan more all right attraction phase none whatsoever just being cool that's how high he leveled up. He doesn't need to do attraction things. It's a... He's got an emblem, like a little thing that he carries with him. Comfort. None whatsoever. Just being dangerous and appearing safe enough because I have friends. And sliding your F50.
Starting point is 00:20:22 This is rape. This is... Oh, there's more rape later on. friends. This is rape. This is... Oh, there's more rape later on. Seduction. Grab her by the throat, pull her close, and kiss her.
Starting point is 00:20:36 Escalation. Say, let's get some air. Get her alone. Push her down to penis level. Uh-huh. You know the rest. My point. Inner game is so
Starting point is 00:20:53 much more efficient than outer game will ever be. Ezo. Seduction. Grab her by the throat. Pull her close and kiss her. Escalation. Cops are called, M arrested. The situation, M now in prison. M grabbed by throat by big man named Butch.
Starting point is 00:21:12 Push down your penis, love. I learned this technique from the guys on The Sopranos. Like I always say, in which I prove to myself every time I'm out gaming, quote, PUAs make pickup much, much, much harder than it actually is, end quote. Cheers. Oh.
Starting point is 00:21:36 Alright. I love this quote. Imagine memorizing every routine from the game or MM like some guys do. What a waste of time. Good job, Izo. Shock and awe without much conversation. It just say you're a master's glasses face, GJ.
Starting point is 00:21:59 Glasses face. Well, man, I'm not one of those sad souls, and it wasn't a waste of time. I learned a lot when I used routines. It was the thing that got me out in the field. I used the routines and got good results, but after a while, I realized that by getting results, I got more confident, and after a long time, I could start dealing with my real issues. and after a long time, I could start dealing with my real issues. Raping chicks helped me grow as a person. And wait, and not just overcompensating for my shortcomings as a person.
Starting point is 00:22:43 That's real inner game. I'm not saying that this is the only way, but the routines were the things that made me dare to go out there. A while ago, they were my hidden weapons, just there if I ever needed to use them. Now, I mainly leave them at my home. Ezo. Woo! Amazing!
Starting point is 00:23:02 Woo! Amazing! Amazing! I like to imagine the NBC The More You Know sound playing after he says, that's real inner game. This is called Pull Girls with these seduction techniques to gain female attraction. There are ten steps, and I'm sure all of them guarantee complete success. guarantee complete success. The basic model to pull girls in its simplest format is to FMAC. Find them, meet them, attract them,
Starting point is 00:23:52 and finally close them, according to Mystery, a.k.a. Eric Von Markovic, master pug and teacher of style. Neil's pals broke this method down into ten steps. Wait, what does the G in pug stand for? Guru? Yeah. Wait, what does the G in pug stand for? Guru. Guru? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:07 Wow, okay. Neil Strauss broke this method down into ten steps. I'll break these steps down further in future articles. These are the seduction techniques you need to pull women. Ten. Smile when you walk into a room. This gets you noticed by the women and portrays confidence.
Starting point is 00:24:24 Find a group with a target, the girl you want, and approach. Always obey the three-second rule, i.e., approach instantly and without hesitation, again portraying confidence. Nine. Now open the group, and not just the target, with a rehearsed opener, a line to start the conversation rolling. When engaging the group, mostly ignore the target. Focus your attention on the men in the group, if there are any. This way you become less of a threat to them and the women love you for it. To get in with the women, you have to get in with the guys first.
Starting point is 00:24:54 Eight. Neg the target. Tease her in a playful way. Use any negs you've come up with or read about. Something like, ha ha, your nose wiggles when you laugh. It's so cute. Get her friends to notice this and laugh about it. Seven.
Starting point is 00:25:12 So apparently that one's made the rounds. It's pretty standard. There is some consistency here. I think there is some kind of standardized documentation regarding this. Seven. Convey personality to the entire group.
Starting point is 00:25:27 Use routines such as stories, magic, anecdotes, and humor to DHV, that is, demonstrate higher value. Again, pay attention to the men and the other less attractive ladies in the group. Now the target will notice that you are the center of attention. Throw some more negs
Starting point is 00:25:44 her way too, if you like. She will start becoming attracted to you, as she's normally used you are the center of attention. Throw some more negs her way too, if you like. She will start becoming attracted to you, as she's normally used to being the center of attention, and not used to people playfully teasing her. 6. Don't step on toes. Ask them, So, how do you all know each other? If it turns out the target is with one of the guys, you may as well eject by politely saying, Well, pleasure meeting you all. Have a
Starting point is 00:26:05 fun night. Five. Isolate her away from the group by asking for permission. If she isn't taken, say something along the lines of, I've kind of been alienating your friend. All right, if I speak to her for a couple of minutes, they'll always respond with something
Starting point is 00:26:22 like, Yeah, sure. If that's okay with her always they will always respond if you've done the previous steps correctly she won't hesitate four start keno touch and physical contact by holding her hand
Starting point is 00:26:40 then dhv isolate her by telling her you'll show her something cool take her to a nearby location within the bar club and then DHV. Isolate her by telling her you'll show her something cool. Take her to a nearby location within the bar club to sit down. Whilst leading her through the crowd, begin Kino by holding her hand and give it a gentle squeeze. If she squeezes back, this means she's interested. She just gave you an IOI, indicator of interest.
Starting point is 00:27:06 DHV by showing her something interesting or teaching her something about herself through routines such as palm reading or talking about her star sign. Something that will interest her and demonstrate your value to her. Three. Get her to qualify herself to you. Do this by asking what her qualities are. Try
Starting point is 00:27:22 this beauty is common but what really counts is a great energy and outlook on life. Tell me three things about yourself, besides looks, that would make a man want to get to know you better. If she starts listing qualities, you can take this as another I-O-I.
Starting point is 00:27:38 Two, stop talking like you have run out of conversation for a few seconds. I read that totally wrong. No, I read that totally wrong. No, it was written totally wrong. Two. Stop talking like you have run out of conversation for a few seconds. If she reinitiates chat by saying something like,
Starting point is 00:27:57 So? Then this is your third IOI. As she wanted to continue the conversation with you, she's into you. Either that or she's uncomfortable around you for some reason. One. Close. If you've seen at least three IOIs, it's on.
Starting point is 00:28:14 Time to kiss closer. Say, you want to kiss me, don't you? This line looks like magic. And if not, just grab her head and slam it into your crotch penis level yeah just be sure that it's penis level other levels will not be as successful
Starting point is 00:28:34 say you want to kiss me don't you this line works like magic chances are she will kiss you or she'll say no you want to kiss me. This is your cue. Kiss her! She says, Kiss me! That's you, guy! Get in there!
Starting point is 00:28:57 This is your cue. Kiss her! If the conditions aren't favorable to physical intimacy, then number close instead. Say something like, I gotta go, but we can continue this soon. Ask for her number and bail out. Bail out! And bail out.
Starting point is 00:29:14 A good method I use is to not even ask for her number, but just pass her your phone and say, digits. She'll know what to do and you will lose confidence. So there you have it in a nutshell these are the seduction techniques you need to gain female attraction and pull girls also confidence won't be the only thing you're oozing
Starting point is 00:29:35 I'm surprised they give this away for free seems like something you would have to pay for that's how most of these so called gangsters pass at last a nigga rapping Yeah, seems like something you would have to pay for. If I want some ass, I'm going to blast sweet sauce. Ask questions last. That's how most of these so-called gangsters pass. At last, a nigga rapping about blunts and bras, tits and bras, menage a trois, sex and expensive cars. I still leave you on the pavement. Condo paid for, no car payment.
Starting point is 00:30:01 At my arraignment, no for the plaintiff. Your daughter's tied up in the Brooklyn basement. Face it, not guilty. That's how I stay still. My guilt. Richer than Richard. As the seduction community, there's various tactics, very nerdy kind of tactics with negging and IOIs and what is the kino that is very important. But then there's another part of it that just goes literally into magic. Spells and mind control devices that are used to just convince, you know, convince the girl that you want to close, you know, to do the thing that you want.
Starting point is 00:30:41 And it's spells, essentially. the thing that you want. It's spells, essentially. This one is a spell about how to very subtly convince a girl that she wants to have a penis in her butt. Ha ha ha! A completely hilarious
Starting point is 00:30:57 collection of patterns by Rod Munch to get her to submit to and enjoy anal sex. Unbelievable. I almost laughed my ass off. Whoops. The first time I read them.
Starting point is 00:31:14 Rod Munch mind list. Pattern one. Purpose. To implant the idea of receiving pleasure from her ass. Subject. your friend. Who else? Rod. Did I ever tell you about my friend, Rod?
Starting point is 00:31:36 Well, he's a damn cool guy, but he's got a new job. Yeah, he's on the R&D team of some furniture company. Make up a name? Muncher Furniture, perhaps. Yeah, well, he's working on a team, and their job is to design the perfect chair. Did you ever have a favorite chair? Of course, she says yes.
Starting point is 00:32:00 Of course. What was it like? I have to ask this stuff. Maybe I can give Rod some ideas. Let her talk about the perfect chair. Feed her info. Back to her in the following part.
Starting point is 00:32:14 Yeah, I know what you mean. Isn't it great how you can have a favorite seat and after a hard, stressful day of work, you look forward to plopping your ass slash butt down on that seat. Point to schlong. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:31 Point to schlong. And then you get there and you see that seat. Point to schlong. And you can already start to relax. It feels so good. Just think about how great it will feel when you lower your ass onto that seat. Point to schlong.
Starting point is 00:32:53 How great it will be to slowly slide down onto it. Point to schlong. Ha! You ended up with down syndrome at the end of that. It's very hard to do for more than a sentence. Point to schlong. Point to schlong.
Starting point is 00:33:13 New voice for pattern two. Thank you. Purpose, to program her with not only anal pleasure, but sexually oriented anal pleasure. Subject. Okay.
Starting point is 00:33:27 Life's little surprises. Do you like surprises? I think it's great how the best things in life are unexpected. What was the best surprise you've ever gotten? And I'm not talking about a gift necessarily. I mean just something that happened that was so good, but was totally unexpected. Let her talk.
Starting point is 00:33:50 Get her in state. Yeah, I can totally hear slash feel slash see what you mean. Isn't it just great how the things in life that just sneak up behind you unexpectedly? Oh, God. This guy's as subtle as a freight train i mean there are just long that's coming no that is coming i mean there are things you know are coming and you can see them like oh it's, it's Friday. I'm getting paid today. Now that's in front of you in your future. But then the best things in life, the ones that make you feel fulfilled and feel
Starting point is 00:34:34 so good from your bottom to your top, have a tendency to sneak up behind you and come from your rear and inside your ass. Inside your ass. What? It's okay.
Starting point is 00:34:48 Fucking something this great, point to schlong. Just take it from behind. Surprise me like this. I mean, that fascinates me. Take a second and think about how the greatest things, point to schlong, you have ever felt took you from the rear
Starting point is 00:35:07 think about that it's actually fascinating if you really think about it and take it all in analytically you know what else you know what else interesting is how simple
Starting point is 00:35:23 words that I say can make you feel so good. Remember, you have been SSing her for a while by now. It's like you feel these things. Point to schlong. Coming in your rear. Entering your rear. Being whispered to you. And it can make you feel so good.
Starting point is 00:35:43 Don't you find that when I talk like that, when I do it, you just open your rear and let it slide inside you. You're in those words and feeling so wonderful. Oh, man.
Starting point is 00:36:01 How subtle I am about this anal sex we could be. I really have you right now. Yeah, I always jump the gun when I do that. It's like, you know what? Anal sex. Oh, fuck. Oh, well, might as well point to schlong now.
Starting point is 00:36:17 Get it over with. Oh, God. Also, Acer, I don't know why I'm asking this, but do you want to come over? Like, are you free tonight? Yeah, you know, I was thinking, Point to Shlong, that we could be getting plugged. Okay, you know, the implication that
Starting point is 00:36:36 your brain is in your pants. Have I been pointing to my Shlong too subtly here? It was very masterful that little delay before you actually said point to schlong, because we were all anticipating it. It was very well done. There's pattern three. I used the same technique when I was in sales.
Starting point is 00:36:56 So you know you like charities? You know about giving money to other people? Point to wallet. You can't point to your own wallet. That's the thing. Then you just point at their ass and then it's all messed up. Or at their schlong.
Starting point is 00:37:14 Pattern three. You know, I have this other friend, Rod. Isn't it funny how I can have so many friends named Rod? At any rate, he owns this digi little steakhouse on the other side of town it's called rod's meat oh yeah oh anyways i was talking to his wife the other day over some drinks and she is kind of the manager of the place huh but she was telling me how terrible her job was
Starting point is 00:37:37 so routine you know so boring every week she counts the money she writes the paychecks to the employees and supervises the food shipments. Well, she was saying that her job was getting so boring that she couldn't take it anymore. Well, she got some relief one week when the meat shipment come in and it was bigger than usual. It was the same way she had been. She had to totally change the process. And she told me, sometimes you have to break the routine and do it differently. She said that she had to get the meat in the back door.
Starting point is 00:38:09 You know what I mean, huh? And you know it's funny, but a little break with the routine, something as simple as when you get the meat in the back door, can make you feel so good. Because it was a little harder at first, and she had never done it that way before. But when she got started, and passed the first part
Starting point is 00:38:32 of it, as the process went on, she felt so good to have done it differently. Oh, oh, oh, oh. Wow. Why is she so excited for her meat delivery? Damn! Why? Well, the first time Wow. Why is she so excited for her meat delivery? Damn. Why? The first time I got the meat in that back door, it was really hard.
Starting point is 00:38:50 That's because there was an obstacle there. It was like a street bump. I'm so subtle. Nothing really helps bring a relationship into a new area like relentless innuendo. Hey, baby!
Starting point is 00:39:05 How would you like to slide on my chair? This one might possibly be better. I don't want to say it for sure, but I think this one might be better. This is the same basic idea except for this is with blowjobs. Blowjob pattern. Pattern one.
Starting point is 00:39:29 Kevin Kupal, mind list. Basically basically it's a three-step procedure one ask her about anything she really really loves to eat two describe the sensation of eating that food and amplify with gustatory gusto three link it to your dick using a dick point. Let's put flesh into it? Sure. Me. Hey, Alicia. What do you love to eat? Something that really makes you salivate just by thinking of it? Alicia.
Starting point is 00:39:58 Oh, I love fresh, ripe mangoes from Hawaii. Strawberries from Ohio. Oh, yes. Me. Ripe mangoes, huh? Mmm. That's yummy. I don't know if you can imagine sucking
Starting point is 00:40:13 into one sweet, delicious, juicy mango now. Mmm. Can you taste the sweetness of the mango swishing inside your mouth? Mmm. So tasty. Doesn't that give you lots of pleasure and harpeeness? Just thinking about that. Mmm. I bet if there were a mango here now, you'd want it in your mouth. Point to Dickie. This pattern makes me salivate myself.
Starting point is 00:40:47 Hope I don't go looking for... Oh my god. I don't know, but guys, I want mango. I just got hit on by Deepak Chopra. I liked it. Does anybody have a mango? Anybody? Yeah, I just picture him doing this.
Starting point is 00:41:02 I know. I just picture this and the girl going like, man, I could really go for a smoothie right now. I don't know why. Pattern three. Freak show. Clifford's Seduction Newsletter. Here's an email I have used to great success.
Starting point is 00:41:17 Your notes are so sweet. I could just... Well, you know what I could just do. Anyways, I so enjoyed I could just do. Anyways, I so enjoyed talking to you today. Time just seems to fly by, doesn't it? So I was thinking, is there some fruit that you just can't
Starting point is 00:41:36 wait to put into your mouth? Like if you were to think about it, you could just feel how the skin would taste on your lips. And as you took that first delicious bite, you could just feel how the skin would taste on your lips. And as you took that first delicious bite, you could just imagine how soft and tender it feels as it slips past your lips and begins to caress your tongue with a hundred flavors that you can't just wait to have.
Starting point is 00:41:57 And as that nectar started to flow to the point where your mouth became filled with all those sweet, warm juices that you love so much you just knew that you would die if you spilled even one drop. I don't know about you, but I think about things like this all the time. You know, all this has got me thinking. You ever have one of those sugar daddies? You know, that caramel candy on a stick that takes all day to eat.
Starting point is 00:42:27 You know, I think that thing is just about six inches long when you first unwrap it. But the more you nibble on it and suck it deep inside your mouth and just let your tongue do its work, eventually you come to the point where it's real soft. And you know that's just about the best thing you ever had in your mouth and you just feel all that hot, warm, gooey candy just slide down your throat
Starting point is 00:42:53 and when you're all finished you just let out a little sigh of ecstasy because it was so good and you know that you can always have one when you really want it. You know? Wow! Every single woman I know
Starting point is 00:43:09 would be so fucking creeped out by that. I really think it's a valid tactic. If you want to hit on a girl, just go up to her and go, God, I love sucking dick! Isn't sucking dick great? This is like a recipe for mace. How to get mace.
Starting point is 00:43:32 I mean, could you sound more like a sex offender than if you actually said this to somebody? I wanna help you I wanna help you I wanna help you I wanna help you now I wanna help you now I wanna help you now I wanna help you now Okay, so I finally did it. About fucking time, right? Well, here's what happened.
Starting point is 00:44:01 So I'm chilling at home, bored as shit, and I have the house to myself so i call up this girl and i'm like hey you should come to my place she is like okay well she gets there and i'm watching the usc fights right i talk about how i do mma and shit hv subject well my room only has the only tv in the house so moving the conversation in that direction, I start hinting at things. Like she was talking about beating me at video games, and I was like, if you must beat me, you can.
Starting point is 00:44:32 What? What? You know, implied by funny shit like that. Uh-huh. Sure, okay. As time goes by, she is now basically laying all over me. So I'm like, I want to bite your neck. She looks at me and asks me why, and I tell her that I just feel like it. So she pulls her head back, exposing the money shot just below the ear.
Starting point is 00:44:57 I don't think that's what money shot means. Yeah, I don't think this guy knows what money shot is. I sit up, run my fingernails up her scalp, and grab a nice handful of hair. I slowly pull her back and sink my teeth into her neck. She gasped and dug her fingernails into my back. After I take care of my urge, her head was in my lap. She looked up at me with pleading eyes. Who am I to deny her?
Starting point is 00:45:23 So I kissed her. We made out for a good while. So I escalate even more. I take her breast in my hands and then I take her shirt off. She was getting really, really hot. Wait. You took her shirt off while you have her breast in your hands?
Starting point is 00:45:39 Don't question the master, dude. Alright, alright. As time goes by, she is now basically laying all over me. So I'm like Oh, sorry. Now after a by, she is now basically laying all over me. So I'm like, oh, sorry. Now after a bit, she is topless. Then I decided to mess with her a bit, so I stop. I just stop and lay down on my bed and relax.
Starting point is 00:45:55 So she gives me this whole what's the problem look. I just smile and chillax. So she lays down on her stomach next to me and is like, I hate you. Well, I decide it is time for round two. Spell T-O. So I turn over onto her back and pin her arms above her head. I kissed and bit her all over the back of her neck
Starting point is 00:46:19 and her back. She went fucking crazy. Yeah, so would I. She fought to release her arms, but I just pinned them down harder. Then I just stopped and flipped back over to my side of the bed. She was like, holy fuck, that was new. We started making out again, and she starts biting and sucking on my neck. I have the marks to prove this.
Starting point is 00:46:43 Well, I find that unbearable in a good way. So I got primal on her ass and grabbed and flipped her over. Then she rips off my shirt and starts grinding into me. She's a drill apparently. I'm having trouble with the physics
Starting point is 00:47:00 of this. I rise up onto my knees and she comes up to meet me, but I grab her neck again and push her back down to the bed. I then reach behind her and grab an and handful of hair and pull. She moans and arches her back.
Starting point is 00:47:16 I go at her neck again. Then I let go and pin her neck back down. With the other hand, I undo her belt and pant sternly. Mmm! Mmm! Let her know I'm calling the shots. I have her pin, and I'm
Starting point is 00:47:30 like, you want me inside you? She nods, so I rip her pants off. Then I pull her into my waist. And then the next sentence is fake. It's W-A-S-T-E, so he's slamming her into the compost. Then I pull her into my waist. Then I pulled her into my waist.
Starting point is 00:47:47 He drags her into the waist basket. Maybe he means his ass. Maybe he means his... Yeah. He let out an oh fuck under her breath. She then took my belt off and my pants. Then I ripped her panties off and took my boxers off. I grabbed a condom from my stash and put it on.
Starting point is 00:48:09 And something that still blows my mind happened. I went soft. But she puts it in anyway and writes me. Now I'm like, this is bullshit. Because one, I can't feel shit. And two, it kind of hurts. Not what sex was made out to be at all. Well, for me anyway.
Starting point is 00:48:27 Yeah, aside from, you know, biting her neck and flipping her over on the bed. Well, I start getting a little harder, and then we switch to missionary, and I start fucking her that way. It worked for a bit, but then I lost it again. I even tried thinking of a different girl. Not good. No, not good. So, it just kind
Starting point is 00:48:48 of ends there. She eventually goes home. I didn't come. It was crap. Complete crap. But I think it was just because of a mental thing. I need more experience is what I think. I wasn't all that into her to begin with too. Sour grapes. But it was an experience and now I really
Starting point is 00:49:04 don't feel like girls have too much more I need which can help me with my game. My situation feels like the extra mask and white face lay reports in the game. It's all an experience and I can only get better. Leave your comments
Starting point is 00:49:19 and advice if you have some. Feel free to laugh at this too. I did. I'm going to leave my comment right here. The vaunts. And I understand that you're probably young, 20-ish or something and you're probably a virgin and you
Starting point is 00:49:35 went to the seduction community to try to get advice and everything like that. And I say this with all genuine kill yourself. You are a terrible human being. You need to die. So, man, that must have been that girl's greatest night. She got bit on by some guy, and he went soft the minute they got going.
Starting point is 00:49:57 After he choked her. He was choking her the whole time. He learned that in MMA. Hey. This is what I call the desperate virgin hold this isn't like my chicken at all what a terrible human being okay this is titled a shocking revelation
Starting point is 00:50:20 about something lots of exclamation points three of the most highly ranked dating books out there, Dating to Relating, Double Your Dating, and Mystery Method slash The Game, the two should go together, have been critiqued by some guy.
Starting point is 00:50:38 That guy's got a lot of nerve. Here's what it basically is. Mystery Method and The Game, in the eyes of this certain critic, are extremely effective for people who are looking to hook up with party girls who are itching for sex. Mr. LRX, the man who wrote Dating to Relating, have stated that the legendary Neil Strauss, one of the greatest PU artists ever,
Starting point is 00:51:06 have stated that the game is changing. According to Mr. Rx, many men get taught certain lines, memorize it, use it on clubs, and use it so much that most girls get familiar with them. They get so familiar that even the most
Starting point is 00:51:21 effective negs end up giving you a slap in the face rather than getting laid. Imagine that. Some other guy's fault. Yeah. Which is why the game is changing. We have to make up new stuff.
Starting point is 00:51:42 Oh no. He said, yeah. We have to think. I know. He said that this method only works for about 10% of the girls in the world. Damn! That's a lot of girls though still when you think about it. That's a solid statistic though.
Starting point is 00:51:59 Yeah. After reading some parts of Neil Strauss' book, The Game, Penetrating the Secret Society of Pick of pickup artists, I have heard of some legendary feats made by Dustin, Mystery, etc. Their seduction feats are fucking legendary! So legendary that if they were actually doable, you'd be a sex monster. Sex monster! I really lost my place.
Starting point is 00:52:37 I really believed in Neil Strauss. Right now, I do not know who to believe. Mr. Rx criticized how the mystery method only works for shallow girls, but we all know who mystery is. He have not dated just shallow I'm hot, I dare you to fuck me type of women. But women of all
Starting point is 00:52:57 kinds as well. Including a Japanese actress. Oh. Well then. He doesn't date shallow women, he dates actresses. I'm not sure if all the women he has dated were shallow, but still, he's the greatest PU artist.
Starting point is 00:53:20 The thing I have absolutely loved about Mr. Rx's book is that it shows you a simplified version of the entire ultra-complicated M3 model. Here is his strategy. Number one, find a horny party girl. Okay, done. Number two, if she's in a group, get close close to her but pay attention to some other chick whisper to her and say whisper to her and say damn that chick over there it's hot isn't she very effective neg in my humble and unimportant opinion
Starting point is 00:54:00 by this time oh number three sorry by this time she, number three, sorry By this time, she should be flirting with you Teasing you It's IOI in the Neil Strauss-in language Strauss-in, yeah That's particularly Straussian Hey, you Strauss-in Number four
Starting point is 00:54:22 Ignore her Don't Yeah Ignore her Allison? Number four, ignore her. Don't. Yeah. Ignore her. I don't know who I'm talking about anymore. But ignore her. Don't suck up.
Starting point is 00:54:41 As long as you're not a major asshole and you still treat her like a human being, then you should be fine. Number five, this is where the two gurus get different. Mystery would make you do all that comfort phase whatnots. You're also instructed to drop the negs at this point and just shoot the shit. Mr. Rx will tell you to keep negging her even when you're already fucking her. Yeah, keep nagging her while you're fucking her. You're so bad at this!
Starting point is 00:55:14 Your nose wiggles. That's so cute. Guys, check out her nose, how it wiggles. Okay. Wow, you must have no self esteem are you wearing high heels I can't believe what's wrong with your standards according to him the moment you suck up
Starting point is 00:55:36 you're fucked she'd leave you and number six number six repeat the process with another bimbo. Yay! Yay! Another great thing about Rx is that he even teaches you how to maintain a relationship. Wow.
Starting point is 00:55:58 I really wanted that one because I do love this girl, and I want to at least be with her for about a year more or less. Who knows when I get tired of her and dump her. What should I do? Should I buy a book? Should I buy another book? I need help. I just want to point out that the two
Starting point is 00:56:18 sentences in a row are number six repeat the process with another bimbo and then the next sentence is another great thing about Rx is he teaches you how to maintain a relationship yeah makes sense to me yeah
Starting point is 00:56:33 tell me baby you sat a light in France to see me move through the night I'm gonna fire, shoot me right I'm gonna like the way you are And that's our reading tonight. John, what did you learn today?
Starting point is 00:56:54 I learned that, yeah, you know, if all else fails, you know, just grab her by the throat. Yeah, it's, you know, we've done this, and, you know, I mean, you and me personally and most of our readers, you know we've we've done this and and you know i mean you and me personally and most of our readers you know i have been you know making a hobby out of studying crazy weird off-center people you know for years and years and years and usually i don't feel you know for for for the support group people i don't feel malice towards them. I think they're weird and got some problems, but I just find them funny. These people, I actually wish harm upon them. Well, I don't feel quite the same, if only because I think they're a lot less effective
Starting point is 00:57:37 and a lot less dashing than they seem to think they are. Yeah. And I think a lot of this stuff, they even have a term. They call them, what, keyboard jockeys, guys who talk about it all the time on forums, but don't actually do anything. I think that subset of this is way bigger than they expect. But well, it's just this is the whole it's just they really don't see how creepy they're being and how creepy the whole thing is that they are. and how creepy the whole thing is that they are. Yeah, it's one of those things where in the game, success is victimization.
Starting point is 00:58:13 Like, that's the best possible scenario. Yeah, and it really is. What was the quote that somebody said? Like, when you have a drug war, like, they're talking about how a drug war is basically just a war against its citizens. When you make dating a war against the person you're trying to date, not only do you be creepy, but you make all these weird things like you'd neg hit her for five emotional damage. Why don't you just talk to people like human beings do? talk to people, you know, like human beings do.
Starting point is 00:58:43 It's a weird brew of self-loathing and misogyny just kind of all together in one little package. It's like, you know, if you're a shy teenager, it's like, hey, I don't want to be shy anymore, but I don't want to be a creep either. They just take the second
Starting point is 00:58:59 half off of that. Just go the whole hog. Our thanks, as always, to our readers and Boots Reingear, who is sitting back there editing and recording this whole thing. Hi, Boots. Hey, doing a great job there. As always, we can be found on the
Starting point is 00:59:19 website. What's that again? That is thefpl.us. That is correct. And until time we'll we'll uh enjoy yourselves point to reader baby you can turn me on baby you can turn me on baby you can turn me on. Baby, you can turn me on. Turn me on.
Starting point is 00:59:48 I really do think it's worth reading the definition of one-itis. One-itis? Oh, a disorder commonly found in AFCs. That's nice, guys. Oh, okay. I scrolled it. Okay. A disorder commonly found in AFCs
Starting point is 01:00:05 that forces them to think that one chick is so special that they'll do anything to get into her panties the most common cure for this disease is to go out and fuck a baker's dozen of other chicks to see that one piece isn't that special also see the first question
Starting point is 01:00:20 you see me fucking these other chicks I don't give a shit about you baby yeah You see me fucking these other chicks? I don't give a shit about you, baby. Yeah, you see me? You are a high-value male.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.