The Fighter & The Kid - Chopsticks Challenge & Fan Questions w/Bryan Callen & Brendan Schaub | TFATK Ep. 1081

Episode Date: April 17, 2025

Brendan Schaub and Bryan Callen answer all new Fan Questions, play a chopsticks skill game and discuss things that "can't be said", Bryan getting closer to looking like Woody from Toy Story, Louis CK's controversial museum button, the worst the guys bombed on stage, Will Smith's spiritual mind, who the next big thing in comedy will be and much more!DraftKings - Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app and use code: FIGHTERTikTok - Learn more about TikTok’s contribution to the U.S. economy at https://tiktokeconomicimpact.com/True Classic - True Classic - Upgrade your wardrobe and save on @trueclassic at https://trueclassic.com/fighter ! #trueclassicpodJOYMODE - https://tryjoymode.com and enter code: Fighter at checkout for 20% OFF your first order or 30% OFF your subscriptionSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Yes we did, cause we back at it again, it's the fighter and the kid. This is really the fighter and the kid. Couple guys with beautiful brand new true classic t-shirts on. I mean, just what do you take a double XL large? Double X. Yep. Thanks for the Jiu Jitsu lesson there. Yeah, it's always like you get with some professor. Like you taught me this.

Well, it doesn't work on you. No. But a lot of like everything- Those are also your friends, they're like trying to show you that they're cool. You can learn moves, but it's always like, you know, it's a transition. You got to know a lot of- You got to know the system before you can like, you can't apply one move. If you taught me how to do a single leg, that's fine, but you have to know how to set it up. Yeah, unless you're well versed in grappling or submission, grappling,

like the movie was showing you, like you can't learn piecemeal. Oh, but you're going to have to be Spider-Man to react that way. You'd have to do it a thousand times to react the proper way. Right. And I am Spider-Man, but yeah, I know. It didn't work, did it? No. Now everything looks like it's going to be easy until it's realized. Until you get something that knows what they're doing on your neck.

But now that might work for Joe Blow that's, you know. Maybe, yeah. At least it's going to be easy until it's real life. Until you get someone that knows what they're doing on your neck. But now that might work for Joe Blow that's, you know. Maybe, yeah. At least it's at the bowling alley. Yeah. But the two on one is of course important. Super important. Yeah. You'll figure it out, dude. You're young. I'm young, man. And I'm going to really apply myself in case somebody jumps on my back. We're doing some fan questions. We have some disgusting food in front of us, Jim What's going on? Should we start should we start the game and start this whole thing with with the game first? I guys want to do the game first Just do the game in here and chins got a plate and Donnie was trying to eat it But even Johnny was like nah, man. So Brian knows what's up. There's kimchi. Oh, yeah

You can see I see a pickle. I see an M&M I see an almond. My guess is you're going to see who can pick this stuff up with chopsticks. You best, you damn well believe that's what I'm doing. What is that thing right there? It's a human thumb. That right there, chopped human thumb. That's a different type of kimchi.

It's got a little bit of a cartilage. It's radish kimchi. Cartilage from the mandarin. So you see the little, the square plates beside you? Yeah. Just pick up whatever, one one by one pick up each item I'm in the reason why I'm doing this is because Korean chopsticks are notoriously known for being the hardest to use these are so Wait start off there thin. Yeah, they're thin and slender and flat

You're also part of the game too. If you want to do it. Yeah And there's your little so all you got to do is by when I say go one by one pick pick up something and put Into the little square thing and see who wins. All right, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait till she's good. Everyone's good No, no just put it into the little square thing what ready go Brian went for the hard one there you go okay so Brendan's catching up now Sinaz has won already but go on Oh It's neck-and-neck right now Oh last What bright Brennan's the second place and then Brian the Eminem that's it. That's kind of a bitch

How'd you guys do them Got it. So first place and I was second place Brennan There's place right and here I have the I'm the most cultured. I have the final boss though. I'm gonna let me go over there real quick. I'll edit this so it's fast. Is this chin flexing on us? Maybe, but Korean chopsticks like, hey make it harder. Can I ask you a question too?

Can I ask a loaded question? Yes, like, stupid chopsticks? Yeah, like, can't we just graduate the forks? They're better, forks are better. Nope. Forks are better. No, no, no. At the end of the day. There's something about the rice is a burger.

Yeah, so it slows your eating down or some bullshit. You can pick up individual things faster. So this is the final boss. It's a rice, a single grain of rice. Okay. Wait, let me say when. No problem. Wait, wait, wait.

This game went way too fast. All right, ready? I'm going to go to wait, wait, wait. I'm going to do three, two, one, then go. Ready? Three, two, one, go. Done. Brian or Brenda got it. Got it.

Sinaz and Brian still working on it. Damn it. All right. Stupid chopsticks. I want forks. You guys are actually really good, especially because they're Korean chopsticks. They're hard to eat. Well, we eat a lot of sushi, Jen.

And I usually don't eat a lot. Jen, I broke my rice in half. Huh? I broke my rice in half. And Sonaz is actually eating the- Yeah, these are different. These are thin, huh? Thin, slender, flat.

I like the thick wooden ones, if I'm going to do it. You know what I like, Jen, is the fucking fork. Actually- Yeah, the fork and a spoon. actually working a spoon yeah better it's better it's 2025 is better and then you guys do a lot of cool shit yeah you have the best baseball player on earth he's South Korean you know you but but I'm gonna graduate for forks are a day fact of better at least forks are very simple nice but I mean if you want to be accurate simple cuz I like to eat I don't need to have oh yeah cuz I'm worried about efficiency one dip it what I'm dipping it in my Chipotle

bowl. Eating rice with chopsticks is clearly the job this man does. Shin, do you eat your Chipotle with chopsticks? If it's a burrito, no. But if it's a regular rice bowl, I'll probably use the chopsticks. Yeah, that was just a spoon. A rice bowl. Like rice with chopsticks.

We have like- Like eating knife with a soup. I'm sorry. Eating soup with a knife. Eating soup with a knife. Yeah, used to have a lot of side dishes So it's it's really efficient to use a choppy sense. Yes. You guys doing something, right? Let me tell you this. Do you prefer cult prefer cultures that use this to eat or like their hands? Do I?

Philippines they use their in India. They use their hands. Yeah, Philippines. In Ethiopia, places like that. They usually use bread. I don't mind hands. No, not at all. Way rather use my hands. Well, usually it's a lot, especially like Indian cuisine, there's a lot of curry and yogurts and like, I lived with... When he gets sloppy, that's disgusting.

It was disgusting. But they have a rule. And you know I'm dropping it. They can only eat with one hand because you know what they do with the other. Well, that's in Saudi Arabia. In India. Oh, smack a bitch?

No. So you do everything, so in Saudi, you shake with your right hand, you eat with your right hand. Jack off with your left. Your left hand is used for, back in the day, if you were in the desert and you had to wipe your ass and things like that, you used your left hand for dirty food. Oh, so you can't eat with your left hand. Yeah, so you'd wipe your, so what they would do if you caught stealing is they'd cut your

right hand off, so everybody's eating and you'd have to sit back and wait till they were done. Then you would come in and eat. It sucked. Yeah. Which is why I, which is why Saudi Arabia has probably has always had the lowest crime rate in the world. Oh yeah. You don't want to lose your hand.

And your head. If you, you should kill somebody or deal drugs. You get your head lopped off. Makes sense. Alrighty. Yeah. That's crazy. They used to wipe their ass with their hands. Well, it's so so in the desert, think about

it, you have no trees, you have no just say no, but sand is an actual incredible sand is actually an incredible cleaning tool. Oh, yeah, because if you have grease or do you rub yourself in takes it all off. So if you have a lot of flora, what's that? Yeah, you put sand on oil. You can. Soaks it right off. Or flour, you know, whatever. Yeah I would use the camel to wipe my ass in. I guess you could wipe your ass on a camel I just rub my ass in one. I told you you never you never fall asleep next to a male camel Why? Because they'll kill you sometimes. They're just like they're like, you know, I didn't like what you did when I was

So I'm gonna stomp your head? Yeah, I'm gonna stomp you and kill you. This is a shitty way to go But you can sleep with a female and they'll never kill you. They're always, you know, I didn't like what you did when I was, uh, so I'm gonna stomp your head. Yeah. I'm going to stomp you and kill you. Shitty way to go. But you can sleep with a female and they'll never kill you. They're always sweet to you. Well, if I'm ever sleeping with a camel, let you know, I'm never having a male camel. They don't fuck around. They'll pick you up with their teeth and throw you around. You're never having a camel period. Probably not. Right. Why not? This is, this is what I call a waste of energy. But I want to, I want a donkey.

Well that's different than a camel. I want a pet donkey. You could do one in Texas and you get a tax break. You know that? No. Yeah, if you have animals like farm animals, you get a tax break. I'd love to have a little donkey. Couple donkeys.

I'm not sure what kind of tax break, because there's no state tax, but there's some sort of break you get. Donkey. I also might have made that up. Somebody told me that that might be here in California. It's a livestock exemption or something. But if there's no state tax, qualify for an art exemption, which can lower your property

tax. I sell donkey milk. Yeah. I milk donkeys with my mouth. Give me a tax break. Yeah. Beekeeping, livestock, there you go. But I wonder if I just have one fucking stupid donkey on the property, will that get me the tax break?

Probably not, probably not, because a donkey ain't gonna do much. Maybe. I want a donkey though, because they're smart and they love you. They're so cute, they're so sweet. Get a baby donkey. Jim, does it say how many animals you need

to get that tax break? Something to look into, because you're not saying you want to mine couple chickens roam in the yard like I'd like to have some chickens I got fresh egg. They shit everywhere though That's the problem and they also attract snakes for minimum is for animal raising stock is for animal units Yeah, grazing stock one last one equals a unit equals one mature cow. Okay. Oh, so one cow would do it. Two 500 pound calves. Six sheep, seven goats.

That's a lot. Okay, seven goats not going to do. Or one horse. One mature horse. You only had cows, you would need a total of four mature ones. Okay. Okay. If you only had goats, you'd need 28.

That's too much. That's too much. That's a lot. Yeah. But one horse gets you the tax exemption. Yeah. But um, one horse, one horse gets you the tax exemption. Yeah. You might just, you would probably save money just paying the taxes. Horses are 28 goats. Horses are expensive. Oh yeah. You just need one horse. I owned horses. Remember? I remember.

It was such a bad idea. You could have bought any Lamborghini. Any, any car I wanted. Yeah. Yeah. I think my horses were costing me back in the day, $3,700. I remember that. It was a tad more, but that's fine. There's no specific minimum number of animals required. Instead, the IRS defines a farm based on activities conducted on the property. According to the IRS, good luck figuring this out, IRS.

According to the IRS, a farm includes live dairy, poultry, fish, fruit, truck farms. Okay. Well, we'll see. I'll get a fucking pig and say I'm a farm. Yeah. All right. We got some fan questions. We do guys.

We got some fun ones today. Um, here's one that goes out to Brian. I really don't like when they call you this nickname, it's from Timothy Lucas. It says this one's for good old rinks. Hey, Brian. That means I'm wrinkled. I gave him this nickname. It's from Timothy Lucas. It says, this one's for good old Rinks. Hey Brian. That means I'm wrinkled. I gave him that name.

He gave it to him. But it's not nice. Yeah it is. It's silly. That's true, isn't it? Hey Brian, have you chosen your tennis club yet in Austin? And thank you for taking the time to chat recently. Timothy Lucas.

Oh, Timothy's awesome. Timothy was at, on it. Oh, his dad's George Lucas. No, Timothy's awesome. Timothy was on it. Oh, his dad's George Lucas. No. From Star Wars. No, but Timothy's, like he's a flexibility expert and does all that massage, flexibility, all that shit. He's great. He's a fan of the show.

Nice. And he's an awesome kid in my special. So shout out to Timothy. Yes, Timothy, the tennis club is too long of a list, so I'm gonna join the country club that's way cheaper next to my house because it's got kid stuff. That's cool. Yeah.

So. You just play. It's not like you're that serious with tennis. It's a very serious tennis club. You just show up. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And there were some good tennis players there.

And I was like, OK. But shout out to Timothy. Here's another one. I feel like you haven't played tennis in a while. It's been about two weeks. Cause you're the guy that like when he does yoga, tells everybody he does yoga. I feel like if you did, I feel like if you played tennis, I would hear about it. You know?

Yeah. How many times I've told people I touch spar now, cause I've done it twice with Tim Kennedy and my boy Tyson. Yeah. At Ark type boxing, shout out to Ark type boxing in Austin. Mm hmm. What do you have tonight's take a little break kids The mba 82 game grind is finally done. Thank god now the real fun begins The mba playoffs are here. It's time for all high stakes drama clutch moments. Jaw-dropping players

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Oh, I know. Nice. I forget the name. I know. And I was like, you know, some proper boots. I feel like you look cooler. As a gentleman, an older gentleman with a cigar, you know what I mean? You look sick. I need to live in Austin a little bit. I need to get myself a little bit of a twang. I'm a hint of one. But you know what? The thing about cowboy boots, they're great, especially when you

break them in. They're so comfortable. You know this, Jen. But the problem, you're gonna have you and give up before you break them in because it takes a hot second to break them in. Yes, but once they're broken in they're like as good as tennis shoes. But they do they do cinch your toes up and I like my toes to build them. Heritage is what we're talking about. They might be too narrow for old Brian's feet. No, you don't know you've seen them big-ass cowboys They have wide feet like I do. Yeah, wide foot get a wide foot one. I Mean listen, why not right? Nothing like a cowboy. They're high up aren't they? They're high up Damn they look like girl shoes there, but I just don't think they're for me anymore. Those Beale Street ones are tasty

But they're high up That me anymore. Those Beale Street ones are tasty, but they're high up That's it. Those are elephant skin The black crows black crows are ostrich. You better be a tap dance. Yeah Are those women's or men's? Are you sure, Chin? Let me do it again. Hold on. Little two upturn for me. I'll be honest. That's what she was saying That's what I'm wondering. Like what do you think that upturned for me, I'll be honest. That's what she was saying. A little too upturned. That's what I'm wondering. What do you think that upturned by this? I would just feel like an asshole. I gotta be honest.

Unless I'm actually doing cowboy, you just feel like a complete cowboy hat. I joke around, I do like cowboy hats and their quality, but you just. I ain't getting, I ain't getting. We're not cowboys. Yeah, I'm not getting things that are real pointy toe. It's not gonna happen for me.

Now when I see cowboy hats on people, I mean cowboy boots on people, I do this. I go like this. In my mind I go like this. All I do is this. I go, oh. Yeah. That's what I do.

I just go, okay. Which is not necessarily a good thing. Yeah, you just feel like an asshole. But they do look good when you have the jeans over them. Yes. Then they just look like some dope shoes. I think so. I used to wear them in college.

Wow. Sure did. Cowboy boots? I sure did. I wore cowboy boots in college. Damn, that's cool, man. Elephant skin cowboy boots. At American University.

Yeah. Not a lot of cowboy boots there. No. There was a thing, though, and I don't remember why or how. You just want to be a guy that was the cowboy boots guy. They just were comfortable and I liked the way they felt. I was like, I'm going to wear cowboy boots. And my buddy wore cowboy boots.

And then my other buddy wore cowboy boots. And we were all wearing cowboy boots. You know who could make us some good cowboy boots? AG. AG knows the best cowboy maker. You'll be on a one year waiting list. Hey. Yeah. No, no, no, no. Hey.

No, listen, no, you gotta, Hey. They gotta take a mold of your foot. No, no, I know anything. They got big time clients. Come on, AJ, I'm gonna jump that line down. No, no, but AJ's not the one who's gonna make them. He just knows people.

But he's cool right there. He probably provides the skin. I like that look. Yeah, like I said, you put the jeans over the top. Yeah, and they're not so pointy. Don't be surprised if you see me in a hat like that. Ooh put the jeans over the top. Yeah, thank you. No pointy you be don't be surprised You see me in a hat like that That's much unless I'm fun sure Lenny Kravitz that ain't for me. Yeah

Right, there's you and me right there. There we are. There we are. All right, what else you got? Mm-hmm These never put it like a ear bubble on a cowboy boot like a Nike. It's never done Yeah, it's kind of defeats the purpose if they're made properly you're supposed to yeah, you know Question for Brian Brent shit kickers. Sorry Question for Brendan, why aren't we hearing about the fish anymore? Is there a new Texas size aquarium in the works? Good question No, the good question still got the fish everyone's thriving everyone is the thriving Everyone's thriving everyone's thriving everyone's thriving everyone's thriving everyone's thriving everyone's thriving Is there a new Texas sized aquarium in the works? Good question. Let me ask that question. No, good question.

Still got the fish. Everyone's thriving. marijuana is thriving. But they've grown up. So there's like, there's nothing to report. So I still feel them every day. What's up? And you've grown out of them.

No, I love them. Oh, me and the boys watch the fish. We feed them every morning. Yeah. Love them. Still doing things. Now in regards to Texas, so it's hard to fish. It's hard to ship fish across state lines. It is. And they had to, they gave me a quote for the aquarium. And let

me guess how much it was. Six grand for the aquariums because they have to literally crate them because it's glass. And then it's, you can't really fish ship from here to there, right? Grown fish. So my fish guy, Brian, who takes care of all the tanks, he has a big pond. He's going to put the arowanas and oscars and catfish in his pond, so they're going to live a great life. And then I'm going to have to completely restart in Texas. Right.

And I love my fish. You've also said everything there is to say about fish. But you're also not a fish guy. So it's also not going to go anywhere. No, I'm just saying you've said everything there is to know about fish though. I love fish. I love fish. I love it. And your Ruanas are getting big. They're so fucking big. They're so big where unless I was going to get like double the size tank, it's kind of fucked up. So they're going to go on a giant pond. So it's going to be bad. Have you seen this duncasaurus that weighs five tons? It was a prehistoric fish.

It's a duncasaurus. But also in Texas, I'd like to step my game up to a saltwater tank. I've always wanted a saltwater tank. That's the skull they found. Take a look at this bad boy. Hold on. You sure it's called duncasaurus? 18 feet long, yeah. See this on TikTok? 20. Take a look at this bad boy. You sure it's called Duncan's 18 feet long? Yeah.

She's on TikTok. 20 feet long. No, no, no. It's a real thing. You just you had it. You had it right there. Don't cause source that skull right there. Yeah. It's like a big snapping turtle. Yeah. But it says, like, we do this. Don't look that big. Yeah, I know. But apparently they're like as big as a gray white five tons 33 feet long and way around 4.4 tons Wow Wow The more you know get it

Yeah, he was scary too. He gave you a bite right there. Take a look at they have pictures of what a person would look out like next to him Well, there's not a different one Was different You'll see right then no no no yeah, right All right. Yeah, go back go back back back It doesn't matter that does not just gonna keep the segment, you know, thank you. It doesn't matter. That doesn't matter. No, I just kind of keep the segment. Yeah. Thank you.

Yeah. Jen, you've never been in the fish tanks? I was, big time. Yeah. And I like to keep fish that I actually catch. You know what I'm saying? Like exotic, like bass. Yeah.

I think what I'm going to do is my guy Brian's come in, I think today or tomorrow to empty the fish tanks out because, you know, I'm no longer in the house. So then I'm probably just going to sell the fish tanks out because you know, I'm no longer in the house So then I'm probably just gonna sell the fish tanks Do people sell fish things? Of course, like they're dope tanks and the filters like I have the best filters. I've shit I'm sure people five filters a problem for selling Facebook marketplace So probably get a bunch of DMS about it right now after this episode comes out Just say real quick. You got be in the Los Angeles area. I'm not shipping all that shit. You can come pick it up.

No, you gotta come pick it. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah, if you're looking for a dope fish tank, you got two of them, and with the high level filters, all the accessories, let's figure out a deal, okay? And I'm gonna take that money and put the new money towards a salt tank,

because I've always wanted a salt tank. You want a salt tank? Oh, I want a salt tank, so bad. Because tank? Oh I want a salt tank. So that way you get some pretty cool fish. You know what the problem is you can't get big saltwater fish. Why? That's why I like freshwater because you can get some monsters. Why can't you get big saltwater? They just don't sell them in the stores. You could probably do on the black market but they're all smaller and there's certain fish that break up the fucking coral. Would you get an octopus?

Octopus I actually no freshwater octopuses. No, no Octopus are actually a bad animal to have either wicked smart B. They don't live that long see everybody Well, they're also the best high and go see participants of all time. So you don't see them. Have I told you story? My fish guy Brian's like the fish expert. He was yeah This dental shop wanted me to set up a fucking octopus So they get this like thousand gallon tank and they're like our clients gonna love it octopuses in there and everyone thinks it's like Oh, you know like Nemo, there's octopus They never saw him And he's like dude we put like little rocks so he couldn't hide he you just never see him

They don't and then when everyone leaves the lights off he'd come out He's like it was a disaster. So all there was this empty tank So you had to get rid of the octopus give it to somebody else and put in some real fish. Yeah, they hide Well, they're just like no, I'm not going any octopus are so cool. Yeah, love them. They're kind of like aliens I get like more. I like the more eels some of the eels are quite like the puffer fish Yeah, the poisonous you need the lionfish fish. Yeah. The poisonous. You need the lionfish. The lionfish, yeah. But then you gotta worry about your kids touching them because they're poisonous.

Yeah. Pretty cool. I've had a turtle in my tank with the arowanus for a year now. That turtle just chills, man. Really? He escaped. You just find them like three days later because they can awfully breathe air. They're fucking turtles.

I just find them in the middle of the theater floor. Just chilling. I just pick them up, put them in. That's great. He's great. Yeah. Have you seen these before? Oh yeah.

What? Puffer fish? So they make drumsticks out of puffer fish and it looks so delicious. God damn it. Look at that. Yeah man. They basically just gut them and skin them looks so delicious. God damn it. Look at that. Yeah man. They basically just gut them and skin them. Bro that's 12 cooking puffer fish fried. I know but sure it's better. That's a lot. That's how it looks. And then you just fry them up. They look amazing don't they? No man. Eat chicken not puffer fish. I heard they taste really really good too.

Sure. Do you know how cool puffer fish are? They're so cool. I like them. They really good too. Sure. I like a cool puffer fish. They're so cool. They're adorable too. I like them too. They seem sweet. Puffer fish if you're thinking about getting some because you can get they'll kill any other fish you put in there. They do? They're super aggressive. Really? They'll fuck up everything you put in there. So if you're eating a saltwater tank with those puffer fish or freshwater, there's freshwater puffers. You can only have those. You put in an Oscar, they will fuck their world up. Really? Oh, they're mean. Puffer fish will eat everything? Oh, they're mean. Wow.

Yeah, they're cool. But you don't wanna have a tank just with one fucking puffer fish, cause he's an asshole. Yeah. Look at that fucking thing. He's cute. That's cute. He's out of the water.

That was my face about four years ago. I was drinking, my face looked like that. Less than four, but... Yeah, probably about two. I was being friendly. What else you got, Sinise? Alright. Next one. Question for Brian. Obviously the heat in Texas is insane.

How does a soft-skinned boy man like yourself prepare physically and mentally for the 100 straight days of 105 degrees coming? Are you worried about the heat? I do very well in the heat. It's the cold that fucks us up. Now if we were moving to like New York or Dakota or something like that, that's different.

The cold fucks me up. The heat? The heat, I've always been good, yeah. I feel good, my body feels good in it. But anyone we talk to goes, get ready for those summers. I'm like, I don't give a fuck. I've been there. And I've got friends who live there, they're like, yeah, it's hot.

Also in Woodland Hills, like in the valley here, we were 112 for 30 days straight. Now it's not the humidity. The humidity's a motherfucker. It's already pretty rough. The heat I'm not worried about. But if it was snowing there, then the humidity is a motherfucker. You know, it's already, I'm not worried about pretty rough. If it was snowing there, then, then I would not move there. Correct. It was snowing like it, like in Colorado.

Yeah. Cause it gets the cold. I don't know. No, I don't like it. It's miserable. Where's you down? It's also not motivating. You don't want to go outside and shit.

Boston, Boston's so cold that when you drive down the street in January, February, you're not seeing anybody on the street. It's just too cold. Nobody's out. Hurts your face, it's so cold. And, you know, Jonah was like, oh, I'd love to live somewhere where it snows. I'm like, you think that?

Because you watch Yellowstone and you watch these fucking romantic movies. After a day, that all turns to black slush and you get black eyes and you watch these fucking romantic movies. After a day, that all turns to black slush and you get black eyes and you gotta fucking shovel your driveway and your kids are in boots every fucking day. It's a disaster. Yes. These people are very descriptive about you guys.

All right, for both of you, what's the funniest moment you two have had together that sticks right. For both of you, what's the funniest moment you two have had together that sticks out to the both of you that you haven't told on the pod before? The funniest moment between us? They haven't told on the pod. That you haven't told. All right.

Backflip. What? All righty. What's that? Backs, backward roll. Summer center roll. Summer several. Oh yeah. All right.

In Vegas. All right. I totally forgot about that. That we can't talk about. I can't talk about that. Can't talk about that. I totally forgot about that. Yeah, I remember.

The hardest I ever made you laugh was in Austin too. Oh, when we were high on Aubrey Balcony? Yeah, and I was just talking. I don't even know what I was saying. Oh my God. There were a couple girls there. We scared everybody off. The girls were like, who are these guys?

I was in tears. And I was talking and they didn't know that I was kidding and I was acting just, and you were laughing so hard. So hard. I mean, one of the hardest times you laugh, I mean, it's public knowledge. It was an episode, but was with Burt Kreischer when we watched that Louis CK clip and she goes, I'm not gonna press it. He goes, I'll press it. I'm gonna press it. I sent that to you. I sent that to you. Laughing so hard. Dude, and it's Big J. Oakson's voice. You know what it is? Yeah. Oh my God. He was a part of the writer on the show It's that's the funniest clip and he he goes. Oh my god

And the girl goes oh Walk away cuz why don't don't don't push it. I'm gonna what is it push it. Yes. All right Take a little break I want to talk about what is a mechanic auto shop owner in Georgia taco restaurant operator in Arizona a life-saving Medical innovator in Tennessee have in common, you know what? It sounds like they're all small businesses and you know what? I bet they're all thriving on TikTok.

That's right. She Mechanic, AZ Taco King and CPR Rapper, just three of the 7.5 million businesses across the US that are using TikTok to compete and grow. How about that? So from family-run establishments to entrepreneurs, 74% of businesses on TikTok say the platform has allowed them to scale their operations,

increase sales and expand to new locations. That growth means jobs. Today, millions of businesses on TikTok employ more than 28 million people and counting. Small businesses thrive on TikTok. Learn more about TikTok's contribution to the U.S. economy at TikTokEconomicImpact.com. There it is. That's something. There's this thing on this. I guess you're supposed to.

I wouldn't do that if I was you. Why? It says press. So you press the thing because it says press? You would not have survived the camps. Why? Why? Dude says press. Go ahead. Why would they make it say press? Press the I didn't say She's so she's the best oh well, it's great again. You make the video watch her do she go she goes Oh, oh my god. She runs off the pretend. She's on her phone No

Back to go back go back. I just go all the way back. It doesn't matter. Yeah, please Fine press the button that's the best of us. Yes, you supposed to... I wouldn't do that if I was you. Why it says press? So you press the thing because it says press? You would not have survived the camps. Why? Why did it... Dude, it says press.

Go ahead. Why would they make it say press? Press the R button. Enjoy. Nigga. Whoa. Says press go ahead. Why would they make it safe? Press the art button enjoy No, no, I didn't say it I didn't she pretend she's on her phone Oh, wait. Meow. It's my favorite clip of all time. You, me and Bert were laughing so fucking hard. He's so funny.

He's the best. It's so funny. Wait, no. Man. I didn't say it. Oh man. God, he's hilarious. What else? So funny. Okay. This is kind of a softy one. Brendan, does it feel different having a daughter after having your two

boys? And what's changed the most? That's a good question. I mean she's still young but yeah there's just it's just a different vibe also Boys I get yeah, like boys. I understand Like tiger was sports. He's like by mini me I can push tiger. I know how to push his buttons the right way Don't he please pipe the fuck down Don't you know with boss the same thing like he's getting into baseball So I know how to manage that, you know, with girls is going to be interesting. Cause how old is she now?

One something. Yeah. She turned one in November. So she's a very young, you know. Yeah. So she's, uh, what was that? I hate when parents do this, but 15 months old, 14 months old. Yeah.

So we'll see when she gets into sports, you know, that can relate to her on that, but outside sports, you you know but it's gonna be different. Do you think it's made you like softer towards one? I'm already soft with the boys unless it's unless it's sports or school I'm super strict with sports super strict with sports in school but outside that I'm already a pushover I'm already super soft like they know like the boys have come down for like a snack at night and they're not supposed to have one. And my wife, Joanna, super strict.

She'd be like, nope, back to your room. And Bossy go, oh, this is for dad. Oh, I don't want that. And she's like, nope, go back. And he'll be like, no, I want to talk to dad. She's like, no, your dad doesn't say no too. I'll be like, what is it, Bossy? I'm like, nope, no snacks.

And then five minutes later, I'm like, all right, what do you want, an apple? And then I cut the apples. My son today- I'm a pushover. Apparently, my son is obsessed with cars and trucks and anything fast. He's a car head gearhead like you he's three years old he saw jet skis and They were down by the river and he fell to the ground because he wanted to ride one and he couldn't and he threw a tantrum and so I was like well get him on a jet ski and my

Wife takes no that's not the point You do a tantrum is gonna learn not to I know otherwise I'll keep I know but I'm gonna get him I want to get him on a jet ski. I know you know Yeah I'm not good with that shit. Yeah, this came I missed a boys in sports I you know I got like that I got like the mental part of it. I got but Yeah, girls. I don't know, we'll see. What about when it comes to dating?

Oof, they're so young, I don't know. Although I did get a call from the teacher before spring break that Bossy was caught kissing a girl, and he's five, and my response was like, well, better than a boy, but yeah, they should be kissing. Yeah, my daughter at 17 now, turned 17 yesterday. Dude, I've known her 17 years. Happy birthday.

Fuck, bro. Bro, 17 years old. And a full grown woman. And it's funny to see now because there was an 18 year old, she came to my show at the end. And there was an 18 year old waiter, good looking kid, you know? Yeah, she was looking, she was like, she was like, and I've never seen a dad, she goes, shoo, I go, what? She goes, he was so hot. Oh, I was like, I'm in front of me.

Yeah, I was like, oh, I was like, you know, and then she starts talking to the waitress about it. Does she dress like 17 year olds? You know what I'm saying? Like the kids, the way they dress now are different than, like even when I drop Tiger off. I'll see these little girls, you know, like in fourth fifth grade. I'm like, why my daughter's conservative? Yeah, she's not He's not like that. No She's not at all like that But she's but it's just so funny to see like now boys are a thing and you know, oh boy me everything there everything Yeah, it's pretty wild and then you know, which he's got a girlfriend and she was like, of course he does, you know, you know, and you don't look like that and not have a

girlfriend. It's just, it's the whole thing that, you know, it's like, this is the whole world. Yeah, I don't know. I'm like, okay. Good luck, man. Joanna's super strict. Joanna, you know, my mother-in-law's super strict. Billy's going to have Tiger there, Boston there, my big ass is there. Good luck, Dayton Billy.

Good luck. Yeah. I mean, obviously it's going to's gonna happen but you're gonna want her to be happy she's gonna find a guy she's gonna rule the room there'll be some rules she's also gonna do this one be some rules watch this was what girls do oh no show me already fuck off show me like girls don't boys already yeah by the time there's tiger has like fucking four different bats yeah he's fucking four different gloves like because I didn't have that when I was a kid. So I'm like, oh, yeah, whatever you want But it's not good. Yeah, it's not good. I stopped doing that now Yeah, I mean I got my girl. I got my daughter a car like, you know, yeah No, you gotta let him I'm like I know but she needs she's like American doll. Oh Yeah, all my money's gonna go there. Yeah for the girl. I thought I had a party at American doll. Oh yeah. All my money's gonna go there. Yeah. For the girl. My daughter had a party at American doll. Yeah.

She had a straight up party with a friend. They've gone down in price though. They used to be super expensive. Yeah, it's not as big anymore. I think they got bought out. They were expensive. But now I think where they get you is like you buy the outfit for the doll and then they have matching outfits for the humans. Oh yeah. And there's a hospital at the like Grove for the doll. School for the doll. Yeah. No, no, I'm fucked with Billy.

I don't know how much it cost me, but I remember being like, what? Yeah. How much? Because her and her whole classmates had a party at the American Doll. I was like, to do what? And they're dressing them and putting on makeup.

No, yeah, when it comes to kids, I don't, whatever they want. I love that. Okay. Each of you, this is from Jack Goldberg, can you describe the worst time you bombed on stage? Yep. Oh yeah. American Comedy Club.

Where? Where we're starting out. Where? New York City. American Comedy Club. All black audience. Tuesday night. And I was like, imagine being reborn a legless flightless bird in the middle of the North Pole, or South Pole, what's the deal with penguins? And I heard somebody go, oh

Wow And it didn't get better from there I bombed at the comedy store one time. It's like the worst place to bomb sushi me right is So much pressure I bombed a comedy store one time on a big show and I wrote this new joke It was a little dicey like a little racial and when those go bad, dude, my whole body got hot I was like, oh I'm gonna get canceled. Oh my god. Oh, what am I doing? I remember I went back to Greenwood was like, what was I thinking? Yeah Yeah, that was horrible. You just cuz I did it with my buddies and they were black and they're like dude

That's so fucking funny. I'm like, like yeah I get like is it that dicey like oh you're good those are my friends and they're kind of like what's up with this guy oh then you do it to regular folk and oh man I was like oh I want to kill myself right now yeah oh my oh I'm not racial oh my'm not racist. Oh my God. Oh my God, I messed up. If someone's filming that, I'd be fucked. Oh my God. Yeah. Yeah, I...

And especially at the comedy store, you know? It was tough, man. Yeah. Yeah, I would... That's a tough one. That was a tough one. All that stuff was tough. I was making fun of some of those farm people in Nebraska. The Friday show, I think it was the Friday second show, a little tough.

They were like, is he making fun of us? Yeah. They didn't know. And then once they got there, they were like, hey motherfucker. And they're all big and they're all, they're like, excuse me, where you from? I know. I'm like, I'm a riot in Alabama, Huntsville, Alabama. I said, I made this joke and I was like,

it was a physics thing. It was like a joke. I said, I'm funnier than Einstein, he's a great man. He wasn't like when trying to get helium to stick to a, when trying to get atoms to stick to a helium isotope, make sure you look for, when they disappear disappear look for him in your butt or something I was like he wouldn't say that it was some physics joke that you should always kill then I go

How you people are uneducated rocket scientists there? Yeah, but yeah, but but I got you people are uneducated You don't you don't get you don't get physics jokes. You're uneducated and a woman goes fuck you motherfucker This real this Alabama. Yeah. Yeah, they don't fuck you motherfucker. Like this real Alabama cop. Fuck you motherfucker, she was a real redneck. And I was like, whoa, but of course now I'm engaging with her, but some parts of the country don't like you making fun if they think you're actually making fun of them, which I never am. I mean, I know how to get out of it, but you better know

how to get out of it because you can get yourself in a hole right? I've been doing it long enough. You're fine. If you get a hole, it's fine. We're it was a great time though. I had so much fun doing stand-up like on the road in different cities. It's like you're getting up at the comedy store like God dude. It's insane. It was such a good time great time incredible Okay Incredible. Okay.

Here's a weird one from Fernando. Can Brian and Brennan give their opinions, if any, on soccer? Who's your favorite soccer player and what's your opinion with the upcoming World Cup? What about you? I love the World Cup. All I wanna be is a soccer player with long hair and I wanna score and I wanna do that slide on my knees. And if I could do that, I would do that I would know that I was that I made it.

Did you hear Will Smith on this? This is a good segue. Do you hear Will Smith talking about like about reaching the top and getting everything you want? Try to bring that up. It's a very interesting thing. I want to get your take on this. Yeah, also let me before we play that with when it comes to soccer, I don't follow soccer too much. Like, right. I love college football. That's my number one thing.

I watch every UFC fight. So it's football and UFC for me. And then, um, Bay, I'm watching like, I don't miss a Dodgers game. I've watched every Dodger game this year. I'll continue to do that in Texas. I love the Dodgers. So it's tough for me to take on another sport. Yeah, I appreciate it I'll watch the world cut my route for the US of course in England Right there. Yeah, I never got crazy into soccer

Yeah Brian you fish. Yeah Let these ads play the truth is Yeah I'll let these ads play real quick. The truth is. Yeah. Watch this. Hold on. Give me your take on this. To dissolve parts of your previous image.

That is the top human skill set. A willingness to die. I'm gonna go there because you brought that up. Up until a while back, you probably thought you were made out of Teflon. Who knows what you would do if people that you loved were being raped. You've gotta put yourself in someone else's shoes. You might say, I wouldn't do what that fool's doing. I definitely wouldn't be doing that.

I'm not going to lie to you. I was shocked that you were willing to go there. How are you internally during all of that? Yeah, so to have had all of this sex, how many more number one movies do I need? How many more Grammys do I need? It is such a rare gift to get to the end in the place where only God is love. I've read the Quran

from cover to cover. I've read the Bhagavad Gita. I've read the teachings of the Buddha. If I had to say what my religion is, my religion is this. He basically talks about the catastrophe of getting literally everything you want, everything to the nth degree, and then realizing that there's nowhere else to go after that. And then, so your whole life has been striving, your whole life has been trying to get that. This goal, you achieved it all. All of a sudden you achieve it all, and now that becomes a real crisis. And the reason it becomes a crisis is because now you have nothing to strive for and the things that you, it's just more of the same. And so what happens is it

doesn't bring you the same kind of relief and joy or even satisfaction. So he said, the only thing I could do was go inside and go try to find what these people are talking about when it comes to God. Or, you know, sort of like, why do some people stop, like in Buddhism and Hinduism, they say, once you make all that money, you then give it all up and you become, you know, an ascetic, you meditate, you pray, whatever it is.

But it's pretty interesting, man. It's like, I can understand that. It's called a catastrophe of success All right guys Let's take a little break on this episode the fire in the kid because this episode of t-fat case brought to you by true Classic and they are on one mission to make sure guys look good and feel even better and they Nailed it price across your entire wardrobe not just tees but

hoodies jeans activewear everything you need to level up your everyday style I'm wearing a true classic shirt underneath this hoodie right now you see me in white tees all the time especially in the summer it's always been true classic we've been with them since day one it's all we rock it's all we wear they have everything not just tees which are the best that will ever touch your packs But their jeans their hoodies their joggers what I work out in every single morning All right So forget overpriced designer nonsense skip the cheap throwaways true classic delivers

Premium essentials built for real life grab yours at target or Costco or head on over to true classic.com slash fighter and get hooked up today. True classic, the best. Yeah. Yeah. I don't, I don't, uh, I don't know how to take that. I mean, wills how old he kind of did it all right. I think his kids are grown.

That's part of the thing. If he had little kids, it'd be different, right? You know what I'm saying? Yes and no. I would question how much he was in their lives as busy as he was. I think the difference between me and him is, I'm telling you right now, if I could stop, I can't, nor would I want to. I like podcasts and doing stuff. But if, like out of everything I do, nothing comes close.

And it's gonna happen with Basti, it's not that I favor Tiger. Basti's more talented than Tiger, but when Tiger has a good game, like dominates, I've been in the UFC, NFL, nothing is better. There's nothing else I'd rather do. There's nothing. There's absolutely nothing.

Like when he's playing well and balling out, that's all I need, man. Literally. I don't want to do anything else. So that's what I'm saying. There's nothing. Yeah, and maybe, I don't know that Will, because, so you give up a lot when you are that busy.

I can tell you and you can tell, you know how busy that guy was. Like you and I aren't even a fraction of busy as Will Smith or have the opportunities Will Smith does. You just like, or like when I see the rocker, even our boy, Bert Krash, I go and see his schedule. Now his kids are in college, but he was like that when they were little. I like, he talks about it. Like when you're gone, you're on the podcast. He's like, I wish I was around more. When you're gone, it wasn't too late for me to realize, like, hold up, stop the tracks. What's important here. I can keep doing this wild shit I was doing, or I can grow the fucked up and be

the dad I've always wanted to be and have a lot of knowledge put into them. And like, and that's what's important. So it wasn't too late because the kids are young. Um, yeah, man, I think I wouldn't trade for anything. Like there's, I don't think the juices worth the squeeze. I think it's better for those people out for those dads, like grinding and then their kids' lives. Like to me, success is I can go to all Tiger and bossy practices.

I don't miss a practice. I don't miss a game. That's success. I have the ability to pick them up from school and then spend three hours at his baseball practice. I've never missed one. Think about what Kobe was doing with his daughter. Like he'd be picking her up from school.

He'd go to practice with her. Like to me that's success. To success, success is to me, and I realized probably honestly about maybe a year and a half, maybe two years ago, like success isn't having a special and selling out arenas. Yeah. Because then the amount of work it requires and you got to be selfish, man. You do. In order to be a great comic, a great actor, a great athlete, you got to be super selfish. Unfortunately. You got to be on your mind all the time. Yeah. Unfortunately, it doesn't make you the best dad.

No. And now there's some great dads who pulled off, but it's just different, man. It's just different. It's just different. Very difficult. And to me, it's just, and now I'm not saying there's anything wrong with it. To me, I just prefer going to Tiger's practice than going on the road and making money. It's just the decision I had to make.

It's all good. It doesn't mean it was the right choice. For me, it was, but there's a lot of great comics out there that you know can but then you could have you know That you get to where Will Smith is it's like 56 and you've done everything god bless you've drawn a line through everything. Oh, here's the secret. Everyone should know Everyone feels that way when you get to the top like ask the Rock if he's content I mean I can I can speak just when I was 53 or 54 I had I was on two TV shows a big ABC. Yeah always wanted to have my own show

I know drew a line through that I'd shot complicated apes I sold out a thousand tickets at the where the fuck that place was in and sold out right away I was like I had the great house. I had everything. I'd literally come to LA and drawn a line through everything I set a goal for. And then, you know what happened to me? I was like, holy fuck, I'm starting to feel, I was spending too much money on food. I didn't know what to do with myself. I was like, I'm going to take a little break. The worst thing, it was, it was such a weird feeling. I felt bloated. And by the way, I missed a lot of my kids, my first kids. I missed a lot of my kids, my first kids.

I missed a lot of my first kids growing up a lot. I just did. It's a fact. Fucking, if I could take it back, that's the biggest thing I think about every day. I would have been, now I'm in my, I'm very close to them and it's all good, but I missed a lot. It's not ideal.

I missed a lot. I missed a lot. I missed a lot. Yeah. I missed a lot. I missed a lot of, a lot. Yeah. I think for me, I'm just growing up and I need to grow up. Like I was wild on the road. I made a million mistakes.

You're just an extremist. Yeah. On the road, I was just, I couldn't do both. I was wild, you know, I was wild. You'll drink all the whiskey. Yeah. Or you won't drink any whiskey. Yep. I was just doing things I shouldn't been doing. And like me and Joanne's discussed that.

And it's just, I was going down a bad road, not being the dad I wanted to be. I wasn't happy. I was making more money than I've ever made. I just was miserable. You weren't present in any capacity. In nothing. But in nothing. In nothing. Nothing mattered. The podcast, the show, nothing. I was just going, going, doing this show, doing that. It's also like how you dealt with the stress of everything that went down. Everything. Yeah. I just worked because that stress of everything that went down. Everything. Yeah.

I just worked because that's what I know to do. Yeah. But I was miserable making more money than I've ever made, but miserable, miserable, miserable. Yep. Just growing up. It's like even like with that UFC money I've come in, like if this was two years ago, that

money spent before I even get the check. I would have spent that money on a car or something and so I got allocated the new ZR1. Super hard to get. They're expensive like $200-something thousand dollar car. Fastest American production car ever. Me and my brother spec'd it out everything and a week ago the guy from Chevy called me and he was, hey man we got your allocation. Be here by June. My head, I'm like, shit, my check will be here in June. All right, cool man.

I held up the phone and I was sitting there, and I'm like, how much is it? How much is my check? That's not very smart. That's not smart. That's not smart. Could I do it? Yeah, I'm like, that's not,

the smart thing we do is to- Put it towards your kid's future. Yeah, invest it and put in the accounts for the kids Yeah, so that's why I did now don't get twisted daddy still has problems So I'm gonna take a very small chunk of the money I gotta get some toy maybe a Viper or a 997 turbo, but something modest. I don't know is er one But the majority of it 85% it, I'm saving for the kids. Yeah.

Two years ago, that's spent before it even hit the account. Yep. Growing up, man. Tempting the gods. Yep. Living like a bank robber. Yep. Okay. Out of all the current comedians out there right now, who do you see as being the next big thing? And by next big thing,

I mean, Chappelle level. I told you there's this kid named Adrian Block who's 17 years old. He's such a long way to go though. Like guys, like right now. Currently out. Yeah. Yeah. I think that's a good one. I don't know. Like the next Chappelle. I mean, the funniest guys to me,

they're tough because Theo's huge. Theo's the funniest person on earth. I mean, for like bang for buck, I think like if I had to spend money off of Shane Gales but he's an arena act. Mark Norman and Big J. If I, it's like, I don't go anywhere and I'll spend money to watch people do anything. You know Godfrey, Godfrey's starting to get discovered finally. Godfrey's starting to fuck for a second. Yeah. But if I was going to like like gonna take Joanne on a date and like go see a comic There's probably the two comics I'd pay for is Big Jay or Mark Norman Do you guys of course my buddies but would you say who you don't want to see No, I want to do that good I just wouldn't go their show but they're crushed and I don't hate on them

Yeah, okay What did Brian have besides a that kid? Which I don't Brian's not gonna go to a show No, no, who does Brian have as the next big thing? No, I mean, I don't know big thing big things tough and we're not in the scene to see the younger guys Maybe when we get to when when we're at at the mothership will we see some young guys? But I've never I haven't been as impressed with the state of comedy necessarily. Yes as I was in In about seven years ago, but maybe that's cuz I'm not in it. I

Don't know there's like that that kid told you from kiltoni that rusty rocket Casey Rockies rocket There's some funny guys so fucking funny. There's that guy I told you from Kill Tony, that Rusty Rocket. Casey Rocket. Casey Rocket. There's some funny guys. So fucking funny. Some funny guys in Austin. Funny dudes in Austin who are really in it and doing it. I mean, I watched, what's his name?

The Korean comic. Hans Kim. Hans Kim. He crushed it. This is Hans Kim. Hans Kim is hilarious. You think so? He killed it. It's kind of deadpan humor, but it's fine. He killed it. This is Hans Kim. Hans Kim is hilarious. You think so? He killed it. It's kind of deadpan humor, but it's fine.

He killed it the other day. I was like, whoa. You know? Have you watched the Kill Tony on Netflix? No. I haven't seen it either. No, I want to see it. There's one guy.

We're not on the scene enough to know the young generation right now. The cool thing about Austin is now I'm going to be on the scene because I'm there at the mothership. That would be good for you. There's this one guy that's really good. I'm forgetting his name. He's like kind of like tougher ghetto-y. God, it's gonna drive me insane. I'll think of it later.

I'll figure it out. What else do you have? Okay, here's another one. From Ben Sexton, are either of you planning on doing any hog hunting when you move to Texas? Yes. If not, you should. What is hog hunting?

Tim Kenny wants to hog hunt out of a helicopter. Sure, all that stuff. Hogs are a nuisance, so they gots to go. But what's hog hunt? You shoot them. You shoot hogs. You shoot them? From a helicopter.

You shoot them from a helicopter. Why from a, that's not hunting. From a truck, from your feet. You gotta take them out. No, but the people that own the land want you to cause they fuck up all the land and there's so many of them. And they breed so fast. So it's called the hog-opolis.

Is that a hog, like a pig? Yes. Yeah. Feral pigs basically. I'm worried I'm gonna like the killing and I'm gonna be like Dexter, I'm gonna get really into hunting. Oh yeah. That's what I'm worried about. Oh yeah, we need to do a hunt. And I'm worried,'m gonna like the the killing and I'm be like Dexter. I'm gonna get really into hunting. That's what I'm worried about

Oh, yeah, we need to do a hunt and I'm worried I'm one of the reasons I haven't hunt and cam Hanes asked me go on a show and hunt with him, which I'm down to I'm worried if I get just the bug of hunting then I Don't need another fucking hot cold. Oh, it is. We're in Texas also time-consuming Yeah, I'd be down might do an's also time consuming. Yeah, but I'll deal with you. Come on. Yeah. I'd be down. I might do an El Conte with Tim. Yeah. I'll be down. I'll be down. All right. You guys are wild. Okay. How about this one? What is one piece of advice you would give to someone starting a podcast? I would say don't do it unless you have a, unless you have, we don't need another

podcast. But if you have a really great niche or an idea or you have a, unless you have, we don't need another podcast. But if you have a really great niche or an idea or you're a certain kind of guy, maybe. I mean, the question would be, why are you doing it? Like I have so many people like, oh me and my buddy are so funny, it'd be so funny if we started a podcast, cool. How about episode 100?

But also do it, but if you're starting a podcast because you see the money Rogan makes or Dax Shepard or maybe think we're ballin', if you're starting it just to make money, don't do it. It's, it's a beast, man. It's so competitive now. If you're doing it cause you know, you want to talk and express yourself and have fun and just, and hopefully nothing comes of it, do that.

But if you're going to set expectations, buddy, good luck. Yeah. Okay. Kevin Rodriguez wants to know, as kids, where did you guys see yourself at your current age? What were your biggest aspirations and did you accomplish any of your childhood dreams? I did. I wanted to be an actor and a comedian and a wide receiver in the NFL, but that didn't work out because I was really young. But didn't you want to be a big time wrestler? Didn't you want to receiver in the NFL, but that didn't work out because I was really young But didn't you want to be a like a big-time wrestler didn't you like wrestle in the Olympics on where you were wrestling as a kid? Yeah, but I you know, I had aspirations. I went to Dan Cable's camp in Iowa. How old were you though?

I was 17 and I was like, I mean not this is good If this would D1 wrestling is like I was like, I don't want to wrestle twice a day So you realize it early I said I was like, I don't want to wrestle twice a day. So you realized it early. I was like, Hey, this is way too much. I like wrestling and I loved winning and all that. And I did well in high school, but I was like, I don't think I want to do this. Yeah. Yeah. I don't, uh, when a kid, I never think like, Oh, what am I going to be

doing at 42 years old? You know, you're always like when I grow up, all the kids say when I grow up. Yeah. My, my aspirational is never money. I will say that I never thought about. No, never money. No, it still isn't. But my goal is to be in the NFL kind of tap that a little bit, but not like I wanted to professional athlete.

So yeah, I checked that box, but when I was a kid, it was in like, I want to be a podcaster that fucking build school trucks and all that. It just shit happens. Say goodbye to weak wieners. Joy Mode Sexual Performance Booster is a no brainer. It's also all natural backed by science. Forget about the gas station pills, forget about the prescriptions,

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happening? Just had enough of the dead scene in LA. The fires pissed me off. The politics pissed me off. This fucking city pisses me off. It's so expensive. We get nothing for our taxes, nothing for our dollar bill. And I was like, I'm fucking done with the traffic.

I'm done with all of it. Do I love, I lived in Manhattan Beach. Did I love it? Yes. But I'm just, I got, you know, and I don't like, I have in the hadn't beach. Did I love it? Yes, but I'm just I I got you know And I don't like I have bad memories of this place I have a lot of good memories to though. I have a lot of good me that guy leaves LA and shit's on LA No, I have bad memories of the past, you know, and so yeah sure fuck this

So in regards to so Brian's there right now and flies back to LA to shoot this. Yeah My wife's there right now. We have our house shoot this. Yeah. Uh, my wife's there right now. We have our house. Um, but I have to stay here to wait for tiger finished school. So he gets accredited the school year and that ends May 21st and they're building the new fire and the kids studio as we speak. So end of May, we meet chin, we'll be completely living out there full time, but everyone's out there except for me and chin. Like wifey's out there full time. But everyone's out there except for me and Chin. Like wifey's out there, mother-in-law lives there now.

Already? Yeah, they're in our house right now. Love it. I left LA, for a number of reasons. Yeah, politics suck, but it didn't affect me too much. I hate the school my kids was in. I didn't like the direction it was going. And then the public school system went really bad. So it was like, leave there and then find another private school, which was a

beast to get to. I just didn't like the culture they're being raised in. It's just not what we do. So that was a big reason. And the other reason is like, I do well here. Like my life's great, but I can, I made some, the only smart investments I made was in real estate. I have multiple properties. So I sold those and the equity I had in those, I can go to a place like Austin, not LA. I won't have a mortgage. Pete Slauson Get a hell of a house. So it's like, there's a no brainer and they save on taxes. Brian wanted to go out there, chin was down. You're the one who told me to go out there.

Yeah. You're literally the one who said, Got it. You need to go out there. Yeah. And then Rogan said, you need to come out here. And I was like, why am I here? And the only thing keeping me here was my other children.

I know. But they were like, go. Yeah. You'll see us a lot. And I was like, you're right. Yeah. So I figured out you everything is figureoutable I actually think if you I think everything is figureoutable in life you figure it out you figure it out Let's figure it out. Yeah be tough sometimes growing pains, but figure the figure it the fuck out

Yeah, I mean for for the for it to be the hardest for tiger like leaving his friends like their last Yeah, like travel ball tournament is tournament was that Memorial Day weekend, so it's the 26th. So that's his last tournament with that group of friends and they're such little ballers. That's gonna be tough for him, but I think he'll be all right. Yeah, he'll be fine. I'm excited though, we've been here a long time.

Yeah. The change is always good. Yep. I'm excited for it. Me too. Is that it dudes? That's it kids. Hey guys.

Springfield, Missouri, April 18th, 19th, this Friday, Saturday, you come see me at the Blue Room Comedy Club. I'm looking forward to seeing you. Let's rock and roll. Let's do this guys. Let's make this the best comedy night ever

Get your tickets Brian Kellen calm. All right kids next giveaway goes live drive fast all gas May 1st It's this insane TRX. I basically recreated my yellow one that you guys see with the carbon fiber widebody fenders it's gonna have a joker blower on it, have over 800 horsepower and have, you know, obviously a lift, wheels and tires, kibby tech, king shocks, real truck, all sorts of goodies on it. So this thing's gonna be a monster.

That goes live May 1st on drivefastallgas.com. We got brand new merch. I can't wait for you guys to see it, but we've been cooking. All right, guys, that's it. We love We got brand new merch. I can't wait for you guys to see it, but we've been cooking. All right, guys, that's it. We love you. Thanks for listening. This is The Fireman Kid. We're out. Hey, it's Jax Taylor.

Check out my new podcast, In the Mind of a Man. And yes, it's exactly what you think it is. I'm talking dating and relationships and breaking down the mysteries of the male mind. And in some cases, male behavior. It's real, it's honest, and of course, it's all coming from my own personal experiences. I mean, you see me on my wild pass

on Vannebub of Roads of the Valley, right? It's unfiltered conversations, surprising revelations, and all kinds of yes. Like my reality TV friends, I have psychologists, I have relationship experts, and much, much more. So follow, rate, and review In the Mind of a Man with me, Jax Taylor, wherever you get your podcasts. Are you looking for your next case?

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