The Flop House - Ep. #332 - Primal

Episode Date: January 2, 2021

Cagemas comes but once a year! Unless, since this one is a little late, it will technically come twice this year, and none times last year. It's confusing. It's annual is what we're saying. We celebrate the work of Saint Nicolas Cage this time with a discussion of the snakes-on-a-boat-and-also-other-animals thriller Primal. And for an august occasion like this one, you need a special guest! So this episode we welcome hilarious sweetheart Josh Gondelman of Desus & Mero and his book Nice Try.

On this episode, Cajemis has come again. We discuss... Primal! That's right, Flop House fans are sixth Kevin Durand movie. It's Durandica! It's a miracle! Hey everyone, welcome to the flop house, I'm Dan McCoy. Hey, I'm Stuart Wellington. I'm Elliot Kalen, we've got a special guest today writes do we do he's a comedian. He's a writer and author. He's a TV writer and EP and all kinds of stuff. And he's a podcaster. That's right. Josh Gundleman. Josh Gondelman! Hello, thank you for having me.

Thanks so much for being here, Josh. Now, Josh, you were known widely for being one of the nicest men in comedy. How do you feel about us compelling you to perhaps say some not nice things about this movie we watched? I will thank you. That's very kind of you to say that.

And I'm excited to talk about this. I love Nicholas Cage. I love Cagemas on your show. I'm a Cagemas devotee. And so I just, I can't wait to talk about this good and bad. Just all discourse, valuable discourse. Yeah, I believe, I believe when I was emailing with Josh, I was like, yeah, you can, you can kind of pick any movie

you want to talk about. Or I guess you could be on the Cage Miss episode and I got an immediate response that just said, Cage Miss. I was so excited as a Jewish person I often felt growing up on the outside of my friend's Cage Miss celebration. So it's an adult, it's nice to be able to make it my own. It's hard because it's to Andela and you know, with kids now, it's hard because they see all their friends celebrating cagemas that same way. And you

just forget how much you're bombarded as a kid with cagemas. Even in schools, there's the cagemas pageant, cagemas carols, cagemas cage where they put the Jewish kids. So then, so they don't steal anyone's blood and make lots of out of it. It's just a rough time. Right. And you know, Nicholas Cage comes by and gives all the the Kajman kids, you know, like white pythons and, you know, pyramid mortuaries, you know, like as presents. Yeah. If you're appearances of Superman, that of if you and my alien Transource skulls the as a return. Yeah, I was always asking my parents, why do we celebrate? Why do we celebrate Jean-A-Claude Van Dam? And we really get eight nights of Jean-A-Claude.

No, you see he was only supposed to be able to do splits on a table, but he jumped and did a split on a kitchen counter. It was a miracle. That's so many splits that guy. Yeah. He only had enough crotch for one split, but he did eight splits. I mean, it is the best way to show off that amazing butt. Oh, he is.

It is. Yeah, come on. So, and Dan, of course, speaking for the butt worshippers, that's his religion. Now, this, why, I I guess primal, that's the question our audience is asking right now. Yeah, I mean, I feel like this is a year when there's been so many great Nicholas Cage movies have just poured down the pipeline. Why did we, why did we take out our panning pan, stick it in the river of pages, movies, and pull out this one.

I mean, I do think that we had a lot of jujitsu partisans on Twitter, and I'm sure we will get to that. But at this moment, we're like, let's go with the one we can watch with our Hulu subscription, rather than paying for jujitsu. So that was that was the thing behind that one. And then like, you know, the other movie she was in this year, like, I mean, people have been trying to get us to do color out of space. And I'm like, what are you talking about? That is a great movie. I love color out of space. Yeah. I mean, I think it's because I think it's because it is a big Nicholas Cage performance. And sometimes, I, you know, I don't want to speak ill of people, but

sometimes people see a big Nicholas Cage performance and they think it's a bad Nicholas Cage performance. And I'm like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, that's a good Nicholas Cage performance. Yeah, it's like going to Benihana and being like, just give me the food. It's like, you're coming here for it. It's like, you're, you're fear might be at the wrong restaurant.

If that's what you're looking for, sir. Yeah. I love the idea of someone is just like, I just had a long flight. I just want to stop. I just checked into my hotel. What's the nearest restaurant? Banh Hanna's, okay, great.

I'll try it. And it's less like, give me, why you just flipping one shrimp at a time at me? I don't want it to go in your hat. Just give it to me. Come on. I'm so hungry. I'm so hungry now.

It is almost as if dinner is the show right now and that is not what I want, sir. It's better. Well, let me just bang my fist on the table and anger. Oh, God. The table is a griddle. What's going on here? I'll be taking my business to medieval times for now they have none of this shenanigans oh man without fuss just give me all I want is to sit at my table eat a squab with my hands while I drink Pepsi out of a mug and not have to deal with any sort of drama. So, um, I kind of on the subject of Medieval Times, this movie begins in the rainforest in Brazil. Okay, I mean, that's an interesting segue and that those two things are not related at all. Well, well, the reason here's the connection. If you go to a medieval times, there's a chance

you'll see an exhibition of falconry. Falcons do not live in the rainforest, but other birds do. Okay, that's a very, I mean, I feel like that is, the equipment you took, you took a faucet, you shoved it in a pumpkin and you said, there, that works, turn it on. Okay, I'll go with it.

So yeah, movie began smash cut. Rainforest Brazil exterior. Nicholas Cage playing a character named Frank Walsh. My second favorite Nicholas Cage character named Frank after, of course, Frank Cadillac from the movie Max. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Is that the one where he knows what's going to happen next?

Yeah. Oh, yeah. That's the one where he runs a deli. And he's just constantly yelling at next. But then one day, the ticket machine breaks. Nobody has a number ticket. And he doesn't know what to do. And he goes into a spiral.

Kills a lot of people. And then eventually, he like shums one guy's hand into the meat slicer and just keeps slicing away. And I'm like, take your hand out of there until it's just like a stump. He just slices the hand away. What a great movie. Anyway, next.

That's my recommendation for this week, I guess. So next to this cage sits at a hunter's blind, reading a real estate listing. He has a bunch of traps set up. and he senses something is up in the woods. That's right. A white jag attacks his traps and then attacks him. Now, let's be clear that this is a Jaguar, the cat, a white jag, you know, the car did not run into the tree that he was set up.

Yeah, not like someone's uncle who works in finance and knows what was cool 35 years ago. Yeah, and it also wasn't the star of the TV show, Jag, David James Elliott, who is white, you know, but, you know. Was his career the same as that? Why was called Jag? James Elliott, I have never heard of this person in my life and I know that that is a tremendously popular show.

It was on the air for 10 years, Danny. Play the lead character, Harmon, Raab Jr., a name I'm sure you're familiar with. Your mastery over Jag makes it sound like you had to write a paper on Jag. At some point, which can't be mature. I majored in Jag studies. That was for my grad degree. I have a doctorate in jagg so this white man and jacks culture

i've always been my dream to be named secretary of jager culture in the cabinet and i was hoping by the way tat me but unfortunately he did not for that job he just tap me on the shoulder and kind of creepy way and then say like hey looking good and i was like i like you but that was not okay uh... and maybe in the next administration who knows on the shoulder and kind of creepy way and then say like, hey, look and good. And I was like, I like you, but that was not okay. And maybe in the next administration, who knows? Dan, I assume that you're, you're Dan, you're just more familiar with Patrick,

labriotose character, butric, but Robert's junior also on Jag. Well, is, is Dan watching an episode of Jag now? And that's why he's not paying attention to the show. Yeah, I think so. I think I think he might have frozen because he's streaming Jag right now. Anyway, so Stuart, a white Jaguar, a streaming jack right now anyway so steward a white jaguar a right a white jaguar uh... next to the stage and what happens

from from this point on to be referred to exclusively as a white jag uh... attacks necklace cage they uh... they roll around with a movie over very short they roll around the ground uh... and nick manages to stab the Jaguar in the shoulder with a trunk dart and the cat eventually collapses blood covering its maw. Nicholas Cage's blood, thankfully not.

Cut to a small village where Nicholas Cage has an argument with his driver Diego who refuses to drive him citing the Gato Fantasma, a local legend about a white jaguar, from here on out known as a white jag. Nicholas Kates is that is not a man-eater, nope, that the white jag is worth a million bucks. So he has to drive this thing by himself through the jungle. And at this point, I'm like, oh my God, this is gonna be like sorcerer,

but instead of dynamite, it's a white jag. Now, I'd like to take issue with this scene because nicklaus caged you know yeah he makes a big point about how like this is a not a man eater he's like only i think she said tigers and polar bears will stock humans as prey and then the rest of the movie does its best to undercut this is definitely a man eating i think there's

oh sorry i don't know i think we might be about to say the same thing let's say it in unison This is definitely a man eating. Yeah, I think there's, oh, sorry. Oh, no, go ahead. I think we might be about to say the same thing. Let's say it in Unison. OK. You go first, and then I'll tell you if it was the thing I was thinking. OK, I was going to say that it does seem like, I don't think he's saying it's not dangerous,

because I had that same thought. I think he's saying they don't want to eat you. But they, but I don't think he means it won't kill you. Like I think, if I think he's implying like, this is a big dangerous cat, but he's, they're not like trying to eat and consume humans. It's not like when the Jaguar is fun and sport. Yeah, yeah.

When the Jaguar looks at a person, he doesn't see a big chicken leg. Yeah. Or like a can that says Jaguar food. Yeah. Instead, he sees like a, steady sees like a toy or a doll that he can rip apart with his mouth. Now, that's, I was gonna say that,

but also I was gonna say, this beginning sets up Nicholas Cage as being not the greatest guy and also not really being that great at his job. He's very good at catching animals, but he doesn't seem to really understand animals. And this is shown by his kind of cantankerous rival refrainship with a parrot that's always chasing him and this

parrot is a character that is not given his due in the movie there is so much like he had that character is so much potential and they never use it so could have been his yago and they just don't go with it you know I at this point the movie I'm like is this movie going to ask me to Sympathize with someone who is trafficking in endangered animals? Is that the game the movie is playing because I am not necessarily going to go along with that movie now by the end They make some like small stabs at making his motivations more sympathetic But still seems like I'm just like, I don't know guys. Yeah, he's trafficking animals to save an orphanage, right?

Because some land developer is going to bulldoze the orphanage. So the only way he can save it is animals are going to break dance. Yeah, the only way to win it back is if a white Jaguar break dances, and that means they can raise the money to save the rec center orphanage, yeah. I would pay to see that show. I would be like, wow, this is great. Or if the break dancing doesn't work, the white Jaguar could just maim the land of Oprah.

Oh, yeah. That's another good idea. Now, Stuart, you said he's about to get in the truck. This is going to be a wages of fear, source of style, just like white knuckle thrill ride. As he tries to drive down these rocky, steep, kind of just overgrown jungle roads with this dangerous animal in the back of truck. It's just a two-hander him and the thing while he's drinking, it's a two-hander

and this Nick Cage and this Jaguar to get the Jaguar versus the Cage War in this drive. That's the movie right still. Yeah, that's, you know what? You would think like a lesser movie would make that the entire plot, but nope, that's just the credit sequence where we get somewhat thrilling music and kind of simple shots of the car driving through the jungle. But we get all the credits during this time. The name primal hits the screen, we're pumped.

Okay. Now, we mentioned earlier that sometimes Nicholas Cage will bring, let's say, a large performance. And sometimes Nicholas Cage brings kind of a more subdued performance. We've already gotten a little bit of a taste in Nicholas Cage, and we're going to get obviously a full meal over the course of this movie. So what do you guys think so far? I think he's bringing the goods today, guys. He's chomping on a cigar, he's stomping around.

He's being a jerk to literally everybody in the movie. What do you think? This is I would say this is what I would call middle cage, which is not bad. We all reach middle cage eventually, you know, It's just it's natural and healthy. God willing. Yeah, God. Yeah. Thank you. Yes. Got you know from you're from from my mouth to God's ears for all of us. Yeah, does God have ears? That's the weird thing. He's just kind of a disembodied universal spirit, but he's got big ears. So that this is the kind of cage that we see in Stolen. I mean, he's not big ears, right? And Ganesha's a god. Well, he's got an elephant's head. Yeah, but that's not his birth head. So, but, uh, so, so it's not Nicholas Cage, big, big

bad lieutenant, and it's not Nicholas Cage, Bangkok dangerous to sleepwalking through it. This is Nicholas, this is Stolen Nicholas Cage. You're like, this is not Nicholas Cage, Bangkok Dangerous to sleep walking through it. This is Nicholas Cage, this is the Nicholas Cage that should be starring in a one hour procedural that I would watch every episode of, it would be super fun. Call it NCIS, Nicholas Cage Investigative Services. Yeah, I would say this is a medium Nicholas Cage and then occasionally we'll get a taste

of a crazier cage in there. I agree, I feel like you get occasionally his line readings will be like. Occasionally? Yeah, occasionally. Occasionally, yes, of course. Like when he, like him being in a feud with a parrot, that kind of like he kind of peaks occasionally

where someone is like, oh, this is parrot. And he's like, a real Einstein. And it's like, you didn't need to come in that hot cage. You really, this, like, what did this parrot do to you? And, but I kind of like his, he's got kind of like an aggrieved schlub attitude. Like, it's almost cage stanza, like George cage stanza. Yeah, he's just like constantly coming up with rules

that like no one else plays by. He's like mad at things that no one else knew was a thing. It's great. And you're like the whole time you're like, Fomka Jensen's character is flirting with you, dude. Be nice. You don't have to be a jerk to everyone. And he's like, I mean, flirting in the way the game and I read for the game. Sean, I got it. And so this is how I treat women. It's a kind of African queen queen Humphrey Bogart,

that's Halloween. Humphrey Bogart, Katherine Hepburn, Flirting, where it's like, we hate each other. And then suddenly we love each other. It's that kind of Flirting, you know. I mean, I would say, one of the things I liked about this movie is I think at the beginning of the movie, Famke Janssen, is it Janssen or is it Janssen?

I would say Janssen, but I might be wrong. Famka Janssen is like. Famous Amos, that's the yeah, Famka Janssen. She goes, it's Brownsmith Famous Amos, which is full of Famous Janssen. She makes cookies. Famous Amos is appropriately kind of treating Nicholas Cage as like this drunk asshole.

And then as the movie goes on, she acquires a baseline appreciation for like how he's good at helping in this situation. And at the end, there's like the glamour of maybe there could be a romance, but I like that most of them, for the most part, like they dispense with the idea that just because there's a man or woman in the movie they have to like each other. Yeah, baseline appreciation equals flirting.

Dan, that's what I said. This is also kind of the relationship like Latter-day Steven Segal has with the female leads in his movies where like the person who's directing the movie kind of rightly realized like no one wants to see this happen. Like, nobody wants to see that booking up. Like, Nicholas Cage does not like cut a sensuous figure in this movie. He's like belligerent.

He's rude and unpleasant. And he's like kind of like unkempt. It's just like, it's like a bridge too far. Like at the end of the movie where it seems like they have kind of an appreciation for one another and like maybe a companionship. You still aren't like, God, I hope they go for it. Yeah, they can make a respect. The rest of your respect is what they reach.

And I think there's, I mean, Nicholas Cage and Patrick Jensen are the same age, I believe. So I appreciate that the movie has two stars where if they did get into romance, you'd be like, that's great. I don't have to imagine Nicholas Cage macking all over some woman 40 years younger than him. You know? Yeah.

You're like, that's great. It's nice to be found someone. Yeah, you know what? They can build, you know, they've got a shared frame of reference. They grew up at the same time. They're at the same place in life. Like this, they really couldn't build like a stable, not particularly exciting, but just a good relationship where

they see each other, when they see each other. There's no expectations because we're going to raise a family together. They both have their own careers. They're not expecting one to do favors for the other. One's not 26 years younger and pretending to be Spanish. What's that? Yeah. And I mean, they're going to have that white jagged money. And a house on Pine Lake, is that what you keep talking about? That's what he wants. The whole time he's just talking about how, when we first see him reading that real estate

magazine while he's sitting in the Hunter's blind, it's like, that teblow tells us everything we need to know about Nick Cage in this movie. He is real estate hungry. He's a hunter and he's not taking care of himself. It also tells you the kind of like, the nuance that went into making the movie, right? Like, the magazine was called real estate. It just didn't real estate on the front. There was no like title of the magazine.

There was no location on it. They're just like, he's looking at houses. I don't know, real estate idiot right on the front. Now, I just want to mention again, so this, because I don't think we're going to talk about it much, this parrot, we learn later has a trick where he can say, when he sees a gun, he says, take the shot, take the shot. This never pays off, which is the minute they did that I was like, eventually, Nick A. just going to have to shoot the bad guy

and the parents can say, take the shot, but it does not happen. Hold on, I thought, doesn't it? I think that like, later on, doesn't he say, hey, idiot, my gun isn't drawn. When the parent says, take the shot, and then he, like, the parent flies off and he gets suspicious, he's like, oh, maybe this parent saw another gun,

and that's when he, like, briefly finds the bad guy. That is the most minimal, that's a minimal payoff. We're being paid pennies on the dollar if that's the he like briefly finds the bad is the most minimal that's a minimal payoff we're being paid pennies on the dollar that's the pay off that the pay off should be that that that Nicholas Cage gets told by the parent went to shoot the bad guy that's true yeah just with kind of an ed Harris wearing a beret intensity if that makes sense yeah it makes the most no I just imagine Ed Harris coming back from a trip to Paris. And he's like, he's like, call me Ed Paris. I'm going to be French now.

And he's wearing a beret and listening to like a lot of, like, uh, EF-PF music and just like, uh, there's games board. You know, we got to make that happen. Guys, let's start at Kickstarter and send Ed Harris to Paris. Yeah, I think it's Emily and Paris. Harris and Paris. Yeah, I think Emily in Paris, Harrison Paris. That's originally called Ed Harrison. Harrison and then Ed Harris dropped out at the last minute. They're placing with Emily.

And then it's supposed to it was supposed to rhyme. And now it still runs Emily in Perry. I was actually at the concert where Jay Z and Kanye West performed Ed Harris in Paris like 13 times in a row. Oh, wow. Wow. It was fun. Yeah. So, wow. A lot of our sight. It was fun. Yeah.

So, so Nicholas Cage is loading his exotic, he, no, Nicholas Cage is loading his exotic animal collection onto a container ship. Uh, he's annoyed because the ship is going to have to stop it. Uh, Puerto Rico, and that's going to mess up his timetable. Uh, when a bunch of armed, bunch of armed soldiers led by a US martial played by Michael Imperialo Lee arrived to escort a prisoner played by the one, the only Kevin Durand flop as fave, who is doing like a kind of a Hannibal Lecter soldier type thing.

In my notes, I refer to it as Hannibal Lecter by way of your friend's uncle's impression of Hannibal Lecter. It also felt to me the Nicholas Cage presence also felt made it feel like, oh, this is Cyrus the virus. Like this is con boat is what we're about to do. Yeah, that is definitely con boat. It is animal, it snakes on a plane with more animals

crossed with con boat. And I think Kevin Durand is also like, he's like, well, Nicholas Cage is in this movie. I got like whatever, whatever scenery he's leaving on shoot. I got a, I got a jump on that. I got to eat up the scraps. He's like, I better match Nick Cage's intensity.

And then after the third day of shooting was like, are you gonna amp it up at He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up.

He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up.

He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. He's got to eat it up. people to travel great distances using like a log built raft boat unfortunately His crew is made up of escaped convicts. That's right. It's con co and teaky and It's like its exploration. It's adventure. It's action and at the end somehow this wooden raft explodes guys 20 way you pay me to make this movie

I mean a wooden raft's not that expensive right so you don't need that much money but i'm gonna need a bunch because we're gonna blow it up a few times in the movie oh okay so i mean it's it's uh... so you're paying for it but also that the talent i'm hoping to get in this movie is going to be enormous you're gonna have uh... probably

gary old men is thwart higher dog is we've seen he can play someone much younger than himself in mank there is at no point during mank where i was like no this is clearly an old man pretending to be someone much younger than himself and mank there was at no point during mank where i was like no this is clearly an old man pretending to be a much younger man this is a lot of it pretending to be much younger i'm watching a forty three-year-old and sometimes thirty five-year-old in the flashbacks and i'm totally buying the illusion that this is the person i'm seeing uh... now i haven't seen mank but do they do the same technique as when they do

like better call solve flashbacks and they just uh... brush uh... bob oden curts hair for and you're like he's a 20 year old slippage. Jimmy over here. They don't even do that. Man kind of exists in a world where he is always an old man even when he's a young man. Now, and for the convicts, I was thinking the Muppets. So that's going to make the shoot much more expensive because I just saw a Muppet Treasure Island and I was like, yes, that's how to do it.

Muppets on the open seas. So that's going to make it more expensive. Yeah, you're going to do it. Muppets on the open seas. That's gonna make it more expensive. Yeah, you're gonna have to have divers underneath doing the m- I, you know, Elliot, I've never financed a movie before, but that's probably like not a dangerous investment. So sure, I'll- Oh, I mean, it is, I mean, it is a dangerous investment, Dan,

because my lawyer is a shark, literally, and he will eat you during the negotiations. The most dangerous investment, Dan, because my lawyer is a shark. Literally, and he will eat you during the negotiations. The most dangerous investment. Yeah. Where you invest in Elliot's movie and then a shark on TV. Your ship wrecked on an island where a guy is trying to sell you Bitcoin. And that's the most dangerous investment. So, so Stu, who else, so, okay, so they're all getting on the boat.

I apologize. No, it's okay. We all got very excited. Uh, when Michael and Peereoli and Fomkegensen show up, Fomkegensen plays the special doctor who's there to look after the prisoner. Now this prisoner is not only dangerous, but he also has it suffers from a rare condition where if he goes to a certain altitude, he'll have a seizure and die. That's why he's on the boat and not on a plane. This is the second movie I've seen in the last two weeks where that happens, but in the first movie,

it's a secret, so I won't say what movie it is. Oh, okay. Interesting. It's called Seasure. Yeah, pay attention to the episode. Josh will be dropping little Easter eggs. Little time. To what other movies I've seen the last two weeks.

Yeah. Okay, so. That's it. Whatever movies I've seen the last two weeks. Yeah. OK, so Nicholas Cage makes friends. Let's just say one of them took place in 1984, and I'm not saying George Orwell wrote it. And. So Nicholas Cage makes friends with people on the vote by being a huge asshole to everybody.

He explains that he's selling that white jag to the highest bidding zoo. He originally went to find a regular jag for peanuts. But now he found this white one. So man, he's gonna make bank. The feds are transporting an Elite assassin counter-terrorist who, as I said, can't fly because of a malformation on his brain that would kill him if he Changes altitude. So there's a reason they're on a boat guys. Okay, chill out. Also the romance of, you know, boat travel. He like comes on with a big steamer trunk. There are other convicts waving hankerships. As they leave.

Yeah, yeah. Now the convicts name is lawful. So I'm going to try and refer to him as lawful or maybe sometimes Kevin Durand for the rest of this. So Nicholas Cage introduces. Now what's what's fam K Famke Johnson's character's name? Dr. Taylor? Okay, you're right, it is Dr. Taylor.

You're gonna get the last name. I would not have gotten any of this. You know she's a serious lady because her name is two jobs. Yeah. Yeah. Professional. Yeah, so Nicholas Cage introduces the son of the captain because the kid of the captain's kid

That was originally gonna be the name of the movies captain's kid Realize it to make sense or con con boat captain's kid cold. It's called it's called con toddy And it's three toddlers have to sail a raft across the ocean to prove that toddlers could have populated South America or wherever. Elliot is really banking on con teaky jokes this whole episode. Yeah, it's not even a book I read recently. I read this book 25 years ago, I think. Anyway, it's by Todd Hiredahl. It's all spelled D-O-L-L like a kid's toy.

So Nick Cage is introducing this kid to his menagerie of critters, not actual critters, the crights from outer space. These are normal animals. But he describes each of these animals. So you know, each of the specific things he mentions are going to come back later. So when he talks about these monkeys peeling off your face, start watching your face boys,

because these monkeys are going to get loose and start face pealing. And when he talks about how his parents has take the shot, do not get your hopes up. Do not get your own climax. because these monkeys are gonna get loose and start face peeling. And when he talks about how his parents has take the shot, do not get your hopes up. Do not get your hopes up. You will be bummed. Also, I mean, I don't know if you guys have this problem.

I could not tell. Like, parents are not known for their ability to enunciate. So I actually didn't know what that parent was saying. I should have put on this sub time. Yeah, because the thing he was saying was that the parrot hates guns. Yeah, right? That was like a trait of this parrot's personality. Yeah, right? So I would not expect to take the shot if he hates guns. Yeah, or maybe he just hates people holding guns and not shooting them. Who knows? Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Every single man of his favorite gun check-offs.

Yeah, he's his favorite gun check-offs. The parents like, hey, production for use, production for use, that was very Elliott, by the way. Thank you, thank you, his girlfriend. Anyway, so the, also, which animals are CGI and which are not? The white jaguar is very clearly a computer animated. Oh, what? The monkeys. Really?

I think it was, it's a rare thing. He reappropriated it from like a Sega CD game from 1996. Yeah, it's like like a like a demo like a sound effect real they would play before a DVD like a production real. If that Jaguar was any more CGI, he would be winking and wrapping at some point during the movie. I mean, I think that there, I mean, in the cages, maybe there were some real animals, but I think everything was CGI after., in the cages, maybe there were some real animals, but I think everything was CGI after that. Even the tape ears.

Maybe not the snake. Maybe not the snake. The tapers looked real. I think they got a real taper onto that boat, in which case, more power to you. God help you. I've tried it and it's hard to get a taper onto a boat. Yeah, I mean, Nicholas Cage trains his own tapers. So that's what he does.

Well, he trains them and then you have to pay him to have them in the movie It's like a grifty's get going up. They just they wanted well actually they wanted to hire his tapers for the movie And he's like if I get the role We kind of already promised it to Michael do to cough. No, no, no, it's my movie now Well, we'll just get a we'll just use pigs instead are you kidding me? I know pigs are roughly the same shape and size as tapers, but it is not going to look as good on camera. No, I mean, we'll get a pig and we'll put like a little trunk on it. No, no, no, no.

You want to come in with a pig? Our movie primal is going to seem generic. Yeah. We use pigs instead of tapers. Now, imagine this same movie, but it's made by kids and all the animals are just their pets. So they're pretzels like dogs and cats for their pretending that they're wild animals.

That would be pretty cute. It would be pretty cute. Like if a bunch of kids did a be kind, was it be kind of wine? Was that the most deaf jacked black movie? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, like a little kid would like so it smeared on his face to look like five o'clock shadow,

like Nicholas Cage has Yeah, that'd be adorable. Yeah, jumping on a cigar It'd be a candy cigar because you know children shouldn't be even pretending to smoke me cigar because I think that just sense a bad Message to kids, right? Yeah, yeah, I think so I mean probably nobody should really be smoking cigars I hope that tobacco lobby doesn't come out. There's really no there's no good side do it I mean they they smell bad and you look like Best case scenario best case scenario you look like Rudy Giuliani, and is that really such a good case scenario? That's how you know that someone was a newspaper editor

Like no, but you might also think they're just very rich That's sure they're they're chomping on a cigar. Okay. So only one only one only one person should jump on C. Gars and that's the alligator from Pogo. So this. It's or Mrs. E C C. Gar. Whoa. Whoa. Dance some some blue humor about the creator of Pop-I. So at this point in the movie, right, when they bring in Loeffler, and they're like, he's being openly contemptuous of them in like a very, that I think was that vibe of like his open contempt for the law

that was like whose charge he was in, that's what felt to me like con air. And I was like, at that moment, like as soon as they lock him into that cage and she's watching over him, she's like, I'm always on call, is his neurologist. I like turned to my wife and was like, how many minutes do you think

Tilly fakes a seizure, gets out and kills everyone, right? That's what I meant to work. England far here, it could not be otherwise. Yeah, basically the next scene, involved like he says he wants a coke, they don't bring him a coke, of course. I mean, it's probably because of branding or something. Eventually, somebody gives him a coke

and that's what let's him do a seizure. Are we to believe that he managed to get a hole to the coke and then he let the foam fake a seizure? Dude, I don't know. It doesn't matter. I don't remember them handing him the coke. I thought they put it just far enough outside his cage so he couldn't reach it to taunt him and then he was like oh that's the last

straw now I'm definitely killing everybody I'm gonna kill all these army men and women yeah so he he fakes a seizure they the two guards trying to go in and stop stopping from having a seizure and of course he breaks free and murders both of them and now that he's free ho ho he's got a machine gun. He leaves dead bodies in his way. One of the guards does the most foolish thing you can do if a super assassin is having a seizure in front of you, which is he tries to open his mouth with his hands. Of course, he's just going to bite down on those hands, just like Nick Cage sliced

some off fingers in next to the movie about the guy who kills everybody at that deli. And that's just a bad idea. You want to keep your hands away from the mouth of any sort of mass murder. That's just, I'm just going to tell you, unless you are a licensed dictator dentist, that's the guy who goes and handles, you know, like, uh, dictator's teeth, you know, then you don't want to put your hands anywhere near the mouth of a mass murder. I'll just tell you that. As Buster Eimes would say, if you really want to party with me,

keep your hands where that guy can't eat. I apologize. That's just what my brain was gonna think at this hour of the day, whether I was on the spot in the past. Yeah, Mr. Eimes, we mean no disrespect at all. That just, you know, that was just Josh having fun. Please don't get mad. Buster Eimes, we've had a contentious relationship

with him, you know, so. Yeah, I mean, I'm certainly very jealous of his glow up recently. He went from being like a larger fellow to a very in shape fellow during quarantine. It's, I think that's the kind of thing that can inspire all of us. Okay.

So, so they, Lawfler gets loose. They make a plan to catch him that involves moving everybody to a secure part of the ship. But of course, Nicholas Cage wants to feed his animals. It's been too long. They need food. However, they convince him not to worry about it. And they want to secure all the civilians so that the soldiers can finally hunt the most dangerous game.

That's right. This guy, lawfuler. Lawfuler lets out Frank's animals. Of course, they try to like, they let the cook out and they're like, hey, you should go to the kitchen and make everybody a bunch of food. I guess to let their spirits. That's a big mistake because Lawfuler left a monkey trap where he left a bunch of monkeys in the kitchen.

Classic monkey trap. He just put monkeys in a room and what does someone goes in and those monkeys totally murder this dude this monkey track trap really works extra because apparently this chef really really hates monkeys like immediately he's just like got his meat cleaver hacking wildly at these monkeys. Which he really took his eye off the ball. Yeah. Like he, there's like a murder in assassin, right?

A military trained rogue assassin loose on the ship that they're trying to avoid. And he's like, oh, time to settle this score first. Yeah. Do you think he's trying to, he's like, maybe if I totally kill these monkeys really gross, the assassin will give himself up because he'll know I'm not to be messed with. Well, his plan backfires because the monkeys knock him on the ground and strip the meat from his bones

like a critter ball rolling over a running away guy. A lot of critter talking this one. I like it. Oh, man, I love it. It's on HBO Max or at least it was last time I watched it on HBO Max. So, yeah, so Nicholas Cage manages the sneak loose. He goes to find his animals. He bumps into law flora. Oh no, Nicholas Cage manages to get a radio. Law flora is a radio and they kind of like bond over the radio having both been soldiers. Nicholas Cage manages to get a radio, Law Flora is a radio, and they kind of like bond over the radio,

having both been soldiers. Nicholas Cage has to track down all his animals, and of course, his game. It's sleepless in Seattle moment. Yeah, there's a little, you know, like Nicholas Cage is like, maybe I put up too many walls with this attitude I take with everybody.

It turns out it's like, this is gonna sound weird, but it's not gonna work out. This is gonna sound weird, but it's so awkward making friends when you're an adult. Would you wanna like get ice cream sometime? Like we don't have to sit down for a whole meal. I know it's weird. I know people go out for drinks for that kind of seems romantic.

Can we just like, is it weird for two grown up dudes to just go get ice cream together in the middle of the day? And Nick Cage is like, that's the least weird thing I've ever heard. And then it's like, it's getting a beautiful friendship, yeah. Oh man, I'm just thinking about pre-COVID times and you could just go for a random ice cream

in the middle of the afternoon. It is really funny, whenever my wife and I are driving around doing work, if she ever sees an adult walking around in the middle of the day just eating an ice cream cone, she gets like, irrationally angry. She's like, you have nothing to do. Really?

My immediate reaction is I should do that. This guy has had a great idea. For sure, he's like, oh, Laudida. That is like the grinchiest response. I got a jack stopping. Nothing stopping her from gettinginchiest response. I got it. I got it. Yeah. Nothing stopping her from getting ice cream if she wants to.

Oh, no. Look at how you get time to cream. You got time to clean. Yeah. That's what they say in a, in a, with, with those topless maids. That's what they also say. Oh, okay. Oh, okay.

That was disgusting. Sorry, Josh. Anyway, so the, they know apologize to Buster Ryan. Sorry, apologize. Apologies, Mr. Rhymes. I, so the No apologize to bust your right. Sorry. apologize. Apologies, Mr. Rhymes. I know you don't like that kind of talk. So Speaking of pre-COVID times, I was with my children at a public parker alert today masked very distant from everybody else. We were safely and

healthily exploring the abandoned zoo cages at the Griffith Park former LA Zoo, which is a Wonderland of rusted metal and little baggies that you still have drugs in them littering the ground. And so, and we passed by a water fountain and my younger son is too. He was like, I want to drink a water

and I was like, no, no, that's turned off right now. And I was like, now, that seems like the most insane idea in the world. I use insane, you know, in a perturbed way, but a little bit. To go to a thing just out in the open, I use in saying, you know, in a perturbed way, but a little bit, to go to a thing just out in the open in a public space that shoots water and puts your mouth right above it and shoot the water into your mouth and just kind of like, well, and you might

wait online to do that behind other people who are also going to just put their mouths right over it. Like that seems crazy to me now, but I used to do it. Guys, what you're feeling on water fountains? Is it as weird as it seems to me now that we live in a germ, wait, a germ, a potopia? I mean, at first I was like, what's your problem? It's just, it's shooting the water in your mouth

that water's not getting reused. But then I'm like, well, there are a lot of those weirdos who put their mouth right on the thing. Also, have you used the water fountains? They're practicing for when they really get to kiss a metal little boss. Yeah, yeah. It's, there's, those, you know, those water founds are not the most efficient water delivery

system and a lot of that water just dribbles right out of your mouth back onto the fountain. So it's yeah, but they're not reusing that water. She went back into your mouth. It is. That's all I know. That water doesn't go into a separate tube to go to the waste water area. It just falls right back into the same pipe.

It's got a drain. Ellie, they're not. Yeah. Yeah. To go to the waste water area it just falls right back into the same pipe Yeah, yeah, yeah, this isn't this isn't Mario brothers. They don't come out and down All right, well it just seems it just seems bizarre to me now that I ever was like oh, let me go to this germ bath and just Into my face you need like an incredible cross-section to explain how a water found works I was incredible cross-section to explain how water fountain works. What is it to you? What is it to you? What is it to you? What is it to you? What is it to you? What is it to you?

What is it to you? I never thought about it before because I thought I would live forever. Also, it's always seem weird to me that I call them water fountains when I should call them drinking fountains. Every fountain is a water fountain. Unless it's like a samurai chopped a guy's head off and a fountain of blood she eats out. Like, the water fountain is redundant. You know, it doesn't tell you. Chopped fountain. Yeah, I don't see anything to add a fountain to blood. She's like, it's the water fountain is redundant. You know, it doesn't tell you

that. Yeah, I know how to found you. She's yeah, that's true. Okay. So, uh, I guess, yeah, Nicholas cage and just to get his most important item, that's right. His trinket gun that has a little strap that he can put around his wrist. So you know, that thing's not going nowhere. He's going to have that until the grave. Uh, Let's see. So they all split up. All the soldiers split up, which makes a lot of sense.

This gives Loeffler time to infiltrate the engineers and find out all about how the ship works. He does some really good character work with these guys. So they buy that he's just a regular Joe working on a boat. Of course. Well, I think he's one of the soldiers. He gets in the name. He gave the name of one of the soldiers

as if they know all the soldiers' names. And they were like, God, right, okay. Where are they? Where are they? That checks out. From the mixer. I hope these guys didn't talk to that soldier

during the mixer when we launched the boat. That's usually what happens. Everybody gets up on the forecast sole. And the boat. That's usually what happens. Everybody gets up on the forecast. And the folks and they drink champagne and they're like, oh, they wave goodbye to the people back on dry land, right? Okay. So, well, it's interesting that we've been talking so much about water frowns because the next crisis is that there is no water on the boat And you're like, but there's water water everywhere, but not a drop to drink Hugh guitar solo. Yep

They the captain and you know all the all the people wander into like the water room They find that the waters all drained like, like all the tanks are busted, and there's like sparks shooting out of the control panels, and then all of a sudden, the captain gets bitten on the leg by a snake, and not just any snake guys, a fucking bush master, Stuart Wellington's second favorite snake of all time. Now, let's just say we gotta ask for the test.

That's the right thing. Yeah. I mean, I'm just going to go with it. Bushmaster used to be my number one snake behind like Emerald Viper and an Eastern Diamond Back. Wait, so you're saying it was your number one snake behind two other snakes? Thank you, Elliot, for it. Again, I'll work up here. You guys are confusing me with your Bushmasters, your Emererald vipers, but my obviously my number one now is the

Fattest of the Vipers, that's right, the Gaboon Viper. Not the Gambon Viper, that's the one that welcomes you to the Layer Cake, but the Gaboon Viper is the one that's a big fatty with little horns on his nose and he looks awesome and he's super deadly. Bushmasters also super deadly. Oh, it not weird that you know this much about snakes. Then Elliott knows that much about Jack. Now, wait, but Stuart, this reminds me, I've meant to text you. Did you see they discovered a new species of matamatta? No, what my favorite turtle, the matamatta. There's a new species and it looks super crazy.

Oh my god. What? Wait, what is it? Don't spoil. I got to look at somebody discovered that was my wasting my time with a podcast. And I can be looking at pictures of a sweet turt. That was my that was my second favorite natural world discovery story. Recently, the other one being the 57th thousand year old baby wolf that was discovered preserved in ice. But yeah, there's a new mad amat. You're going to like it. Oh, man, man, what in ice. But yeah, there's a new matamatta, you're gonna like it.

Oh man, man, what a teaser. Oh, okay, so Bushmaster bites the captain. Of course, you guys were like, fuck, this dude is smoked because a Bushmaster's venom is super deadly. But Nicholas Cage is like, don't worry, it'll be fine. Maybe we'll get some anivanum. Meanwhile. But he knows he's lying. Yeah, he's been to Jensen and is like, we got to help. And he's Meanwhile. But he knows he's lying.

He's like, you know, he's been condensed and is like, we got to help. And he's like, no, I was just lying. I was trying to keep the kid happy. Well, he's trying to keep the kid happy. And I think he's looking for an excuse to just go for a little walk, you know? Yeah, because I'm not cooped up in one room.

You're like, well, he's that age. He's got to get steps, you know? I'm not sure if we've made it clear. If we have, I forgot that the captain is the father of the kid that has sort of melted Nicholas Cage's heart a little bit. Yeah, it's ironic, because the child is the father of the man.

But in this case, the captain is the father of the kid. Yeah, yeah. And, and, and Femke Johnson keeps trying to like get Nicholas Cage to do something good and he keeps being like No, that's not what I do lady like It's like no, don't care about stuff. I just want to do my thing Look, I'm all about real estate and selling wild animals. That's what I do Ask me to do one of those two things. Otherwise, I'm the bad guy, duh.

Do do do do do do do. She looked at her, she looked, a five-gagin's and looked at her horoscope and was like, convince one person to do a nice thing and she's like, okay, I guess I got my merch orders. Guys, I picked the wrong guy. I'm thinking about both captains and animals. Captain Kangaroo could be so much more exciting

than what it actually is. Like if you were just basing it on the title, like imagine a kangaroo who's a captain. Yeah. Yeah, sure. Well, the problem is that the problem is that he's a captain in the SS. So that's the, that's the relationship. So it's less cool. That's why they're placing them about Keisha.

Yeah. No, but you're right, Dan. It's, when I was a kid, certainly, Captain Kangaroo was already like not hip anymore. Like, it had been on since my parents were kids. And I certainly had an image in my head that was not born out when they said, hey, watch this. And they showed me a man that was not a Kangaroo just

talking about, I don't know. I got a guy with a bull cut. That's a puppet. There was, was that also the show that Mr. Green jeans was on? Yeah. Who said I had green pants? And my dad would talk about how much he loved that show and love Mr. Green jeans. And I was like, that must have been a rough time in American history when you would just be excited by a man with different colored pants.

Like that's, this is the novelty he has. It would have been pretty fun if Mr. Green jeans was a kangaroo yeah a little surgery right there I think pong balls fell from the sky at certain points that was the other big draw in in Captain kangaroo land yeah I mean I grew up on you can't well that's the I grew up on you can't do that on television I was used to much more exciting things falling out of the sky and also locker room gags. Come on. When they would step out of the locker room and tell a gag.

It's crazy because the whole time, I mean, correct me if I'm wrong, but they're on television. Yeah. That's the, well, I mean, they were shut down eventually. Yeah. Yeah. OSHA. Yeah. I mean, you can't have a restaurant that essentially serves

barf and just and just have just serves vomit to kids and keep that open for too long. Eventually the government's going to find out. Yeah. Uh, so while they're dealing with the whole snake situation, the white jag comes out of hiding and kills one of the soldiers. That's right. Maybe it is a man-eater or a man killer. We'll find out. Uh, so the other soldiers are pretty pissed off. So they decide not only they're gonna kill Lawflar which Michael and Peary Oli's like But he's my pride and joy They also decide he has to get there alive. We have to take him in alive. He's very committed. He is very much like

He had he watched only up to he watched aliens but not after uh Paul Reiser dies. He's like Paul Reiser is a good guy. It's all gonna work out for him. Hero of the movie. Yeah. If only Lausie Ripley would get out of his way and just let him do his job. It just wants one of them Xeno morphs. Uh they also decide they want to kill the cat, which of course the cat in this case, the white jag Nicholas gauge, not a fan of this plan. Now, this would be a bad time for me to stop momentum by making up a joke about Xenomorph's Arrow, which is a classic ancient Greek paradox, in which an arrow, which seems to be an image

of movement, is actually not because a little mini arrow comes out of the front of it and goes through Heredin's hands. Anyway, that Xenomorph's That's that was a waste of time. So the slogan of the podcast, well, that was a waste of time. We've seen your time since 2007. Anyways, too. So Dr Taylor and Frank, this is their character's name, obviously, it's Fomke Kajensen, Nicholas Cage, wander off the front, Antivenna, and just kind of to goof off for a little bit. Nicholas Cage used this off the front, Antivenom, and just kind of to goof off for a little bit. Nicholas Cage used this as an opportunity to start hunting monkeys with his blow gun,

and it's a great scene of him dipping his little blow darts and poison and spitting them on monkeys, using it to not just using his mouth, that would be silly. Yeah, that sounds like a 90s alt rock album hunting monkeys with his blow gun. Yeah, yeah. I don't know why it's under that. It's standing outside a broken phone booth hunting monkey. Monkeys with my book on the money in my hand.

It's a primitive radio. Yeah. primitive radio Nick Cage. In scenes that almost mirror each other, we see the primal radio gods. Is that where we anyway?

In scenes that almost mirror each other, we see Nicholas Cage hunting the monkeys and Lawflour hunting the pilot in his guard with a rifle. So he kills the real monkey, huh? Yep. He kills the pilot and decides to do. It's a real monkey. It turns out his man. Oh, interesting. Lawflour turns the ship around and then breaks everything. Go on. When leftler is shooting people like through the window from far away, I had the fun thought for no one.

Wow, Kevin Durand is still really great from long range, even coming back from that rupture to killies. You know, kind of a basketball cage miss crossed. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know anything about basketball, but I know enough that Eleves Tex about Kevin Durand Confused me a little bit for a second

That's kind of where I live in jokes that are mostly confusing So they realize the person is a mistake who knows exactly the boat's going in the wrong direction. Uh-oh So they realize the person is a mistake who knows the boat's going in the wrong direction. Uh-oh Nicholas Cageman just to get the drop-on lawflour they get in a standoff This is one of there's a couple more of these scenes where they basically like just getting a fight So they can interact for a little bit and talk and then they wander off in their own directions. So they get in a standoff He Nicholas Cage has to choose is he going to shoot the white jag or lawflour with his one dark in his dark on his

trinkets that that jaguar uh... here comes watch out boys it'll chew them up it's a man-eater and it might be the kid right that's what the right the kid uh... so he instead of course he shoots lawful and then he scares the cat off with his uh... his pistol and lawful runs away seen over nothing accomplished instead, of course, he shoots Laughler, and then he scares the cat off with his pistol, and Laughler runs away, seen over.

Nothing accomplished. Except Nicholas Cage, I guess, shows that he's grown a little bit as a person, right? I was a little confused by this, too, because it seemed like it seemed from the way they seemed to shot at first that Nick Cage did hit him with the darts, but then the darts was on the ground, it didn't have any thing missing from it, like the bad guy seemed okay, I don't know. Yeah, that was, I think that's, I think if I was theorizing, using information from later in the movie, because I had the same impression, I think the thing is like it did hit him,

but he pulled it out quickly, because later he takes a couple of those darts, and it takes a while for the, for the curaire to, to kick in. Uh, but here it's, uh, I think, I don't know if it's necessarily character growth for Nicholas Gaves that he didn't let a, his Jaguar mall a child. Uh, because he's always, he has that relationship with him that's kind of like a Wallace Beary type thing where it's like, um, kind of mean to this kid, but I give the kid a lot of my time, you know, like I'm, I'm kind of a rough, rough guy, but the fact that I'm sitting here talking with the kid shows that I really have a soft heart inside.

He's like, you know, we're at Asner and Up, that kind of thing, you know. So this is the point in the movie where we start worrying about lifeboats, right? There's two lifeboats, but apparently most of the crew stole one of the lifeboats and ran off, which is why we have been seeing them. The leaders. Really helped cut down the budget that the crew ran away with the lifeboats and ran off, which is why we have been seeing them. The really helped cut down the budget that the crew ran away with the life

folks. So we have to thank them because it meant that many actors they didn't need to pay or Sean camera ever. And that lifeboat budget was going to go through the roof. Yeah, you see that other lifeboat. Yeah, they're luckily they're able to reuse the the first lifeboat for the second lifeboat when they shoot it. So that I guess nobody can escape using it. But then they remember, oh, oh yeah there's like a second secret

like a third secret lifeboat somewhere in the hold we'll get to that later. And now I know what you're thinking I want to see Nick Cage getting that lifeboat with that white jaguar guys that movie already exists it's called Life of Pi I think you're gonna love it has a lot to say about the universe in our place in it continues to work. So Nicholas Cage storms off to find his white jag, Laughler kills the leader of the soldiers and a bunch of other soldiers. it continues to work. So, Nicholas Cage storms off to find his white jag. Lawflour kills the leader of the soldiers and a bunch of other soldiers. They're basically all getting killed.

Lawflour manages to jump him, beat some up, ties him up. We see Michael Imperiali kills one of his own guys to save Lawflour. Wow, he is a traitor. He's got to bring him in alive. This Jaguar showed his spots Based on what we find out later. I was a little unclear about input period these Play here because like it seemed like from what we learn and I'll just spoil it that this you know This guy used to work for the government this bad guy and

Loisler then he went rogue and they're just kind of trying to clean up their own mess to some degree Like it seems like they would just shoot him But I guess he might have some information that they want or something. I don't know it no I'm with you at the resolution because he's he's so insisting we've got to bring him in alive I'm gonna kill one of my own men so I can bring this guy in alive. And then at the end, he was like, I have to bring him in alive. And he was like, live compromising information on you. And it's like, well, that's a second reason to kill him.

Yeah. Yeah. There's no reasons to not. I mean, other than just like the goodness of human kind. Yeah. That's, the Imperial League is, they revealed that he's an NSA guy. He's not, he's not, this, he's there under false pretenses.

But yeah, it's never clear what, like if the NSA just wants to like, clean up their own tracks, then killing Law Flore right now would be the best thing for them to do. Absolutely, it's such an excuse. Because like, if they had to put up the pretence of we're bringing him in alive,

we're gonna give him a trial, but really they were fearing that he would expose them and all the things he, they had him do. You'd be like, oh, I understand this tension, but there was no tension. Like everybody has the same motive, which is we hate this guy who's murder and everyone on the boat.

I really, it's really disheartening to hear you guys talk about a human life like a number on a balance sheet right now. You know? I mean, Imperialie shot the other guys. So someone was going to dice. He slid his throat. Yeah. A person like he likes it. Also, these are fictional characters. What? But it does feel there's something there that makes me think that there had to have been

more going on with Michael and Pieroli's character. And then they just like either. Is this the Christmas I find out Michael Imperialie isn't real? I don't want you to find out this way. Your parents should have told you. But he's got a podcast now. But the tequila, the tequila commercials. He it's I wonder if it's one of those cases of like. We didn't have him for as many days as we thought we had him for. And so the scene where he was going to like do cases of like, we didn't have them for as many days

as we thought we had him for. And so the scene where he was gonna do something, we didn't shoot. Cause it really feels like there's a big chunk of movie missing that would explain why he wants him alive. There's like three walk-in talks they were planning on shooting and they just didn't do. And the movie is very short.

So that also attracts that way. Yeah, or like, cause I started when I'm like, is it gonna turn out that like, he's in love with him or sent, like what possible reason would he have for keeping him alive? And they never,

is he working with him? Or that they were gonna double-cross everybody else and escape like, and do crime stuff together? But there was no. That never happens. They never try to do it. So it's really,

it feels like it's just a matter of like We'll figure it out. We'll figure out why he's doing these things when we get to that part Oh, we didn't figure it out. Oh, well the movie's over goodbye Yeah, it was all the money from the townspeople and they skipped town and to show primal at another town Hoping that word hasn't got ahead Kind of on a on a music man type. Yeah The town's having a town meeting and they're like we don't have any movies to show well of a music man type. Yeah. Yeah. They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me.

They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me.

They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me.

They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me. They're doing it for me. Gary Indiana Gary Indiana. That's not where he is from. Yeah. No, but he wasn't the movie about the US. That's Indiana. Yeah. Just your thanks system on the screenplay. So yeah, we're not we're down to, you know, we're in theras in his house, but he never heard them hissing. So they tried to kill him in his sleep. And he gave them away. There's a certain art to starting a sentence knowing you're going to get interrupted

for another song. So we're down to the a few quarters from our wets But it turned out it was stolen so we had to send it back to Mongolia So these songs are now about the real Nicholas The real nixie It was Movie yeah, so he was planning to be buried in New Orleans in some kind of pyramid like that. Anyway.

Yeah, so we got the doc, we got Nicholas Cage, we got Rafi, that's the name of the son of the captain. The captain still playing in the live musician. Despite the fact that his body is burning up with Bushmaster Venom. Yeah, this is the thing, they like make a big deal about how he's dead already. Yeah, yeah.

And then like, he hangs on through the movie. The places that are never really explained. He has the best case scenario, which is like, everyone else is running around chasing this murder or being chased and he just gets to sit back and just be in a snake venom coma and then gets off the ship and he's fine, you know. Yeah, they're like, no, don't worry about the killer.

Focus on getting well. Yeah. This is kind of a goop thing, right? You go through a tough day in a snake venom coma, you get revived, all the toxins are out. Huh, stick a magic egg up your butt and then you're healed. Is that what they say in goop? Because if you stick a egg up your butt,

it will turn to goop. It'll probably crack, you know. So they find the spare lifeboat, they toss it over the side. They're like, we're going to get free. And then lawfulers shows up. They get to gun battle. The special raft gets shot. They use the shipping containers to kind of evade lawfuler. And then Nicholas Cage goes down, grabs a fucking compound bow. And he's like, I'm going to go hunting and he uses, uh, Fomke Jensen is bait and you're like, hell, yeah, this movie's going to get awesome. Does not stay awesome for very long because we almost immediately get into

a standoff where Frank has, uh, Fomke Jensen in Frank, Frank's Nicholas Cage. I just fucked that up. So many names. and my notes are so poorly written. Law Flur and man just to get Fomke-Gensen. You're doing great, Stu. You're doing great. You know, we're all flawed. None of us are perfect. You're doing great. Yeah. Law Flur has Fomke-Gensen. He's got his machine gun.

He's got it like machine gun up to her head, but he's like holding it kind of awkward and you're like, really? Is that going to work? I don't know. Nicholas Cage has some dead derites with this compound, though. He's got it pulled back and you're like, oh man, this gonna work? I don't know. Nicholas Cage has some dead derights with this compound bow. He's got it pulled back and you're like, oh man, this is gonna be awesome. But before he can shoot him,

Michael Imperial Lee shows up and we have this. Three-way standoff where everyone's shouting. There's a lot of talking. Of course, everybody starts getting shot. Michael Imperial Lee gets killed. Nicholas Cage gets shot. Lawfuler gets shot. Fountain Cajensen, not shot, she survives.

Now I want to take issue with, let's call it the premise of this movie, which is I think. No, I think that the movie's leading up to this moment where it's supposed to be like, okay, well, Nicholas Cage is this expert hunter, and now he's going to hunt this bad guy like the most dangerous game. Yeah his special abilities as a hunter and part of the problem is number one as we've said before he's not

shown to be that great a hunter at the beginning of the movie like you see like the first time we see him he's kind of fucking up but number two like his big hunting plan, this point is like, okay, Famke, your bait, go downstairs and make a lot of noise. And like the bad guy, immediately, like when he captures her, he's like, okay, well, clearly you were divergent. Like, he knows what it is. It is the simplest plan. But this play was all for what happens later.

Yeah. I mean, later on, he's more of a cool hot or dude, but yeah I know keep it simple stoop stupid. That's I almost said keep it simple Stewart, which is what I tell myself every morning No, I mess it up. Okay, so We after the standoff, Law Flare manages to tie the doctor and the kid up and he leaves them with a little friend. That's right. The Bushmaster from before. Hell yeah, oh man, this guy's so tough. You got to watch out because that venom will kill you over the course

of an entire movie maybe. Frank and Law Okay. Uh, Frank and Lawford. It feels like the Bush, the Bushmaster, like, forgot to get a poison refill before we left the house that day and he's just like, I got to make a big show of this, about people are counting on me, uh, play with me, play with me. Like, uh, and that's one of the thing about the Bushmasters that they're normally capable of multiple venomous bites in a row. So you know, like normally you're like, he's got plenty of venom in his thing. Like, I can't see, obviously,

he doesn't have a little meter above his head showing me his venom reserves. That would be crazy. Or a video game that I'm playing. He's eating up. He's alone in venom. He's eating up. He's eating up.

He's eating up. He's eating up. He's eating up. He's eating up. He's eating up. He's eating up. He's eating up. He's eating up.

He's eating up. He's eating up. He's eating up. He's eating up. and NBA Jam is that it's NBA Jam right? It is a VGM cool the The other thing there's just like so many little things the movie were like just say he'll be dead in a day without Anti-Vendom not 20 minutes Then it makes sense that he's alive in a day Yeah, well, maybe they maybe said 20 minutes so every every extra day He feel like the guys like oh man Like I got so much more to I'm so much better. It's reviving this than I thought that's more of a miracle of John Aquad van Damman

I mean pick a less venomous snake. This is your your ploy We'll still be worried for the guy if you don't have any anti venom Right, just all those little things of like, wait a minute, why don't you either both of you turn on Michael and Pirioli or both of you turn on Loffler, just like, you have common interest. Why is this a three-way standout? I was also seeing later on like where like the kid has, or I think we actually went past the shoot,

the standoff on the, at the top of the boat, where like the deck is what it's called amongst the sailors. Yeah, yeah, really. Where they group. They just shoot off of the deck where like the kid has so much time to run away. Yeah. And he just sort of stands around.

Similarly, there's a scene that we've got has where Laughler calls into the Coast Guard pretending to be a US Marshal and calling in for a helicopter and some food, and they're like, we'll be there in one hour. And I'm like, OK, that's the ticking clock. They've got one hour to stop them before he escapes. Never comes up again. It's not like it's not an issue.

Not something they need it to have in there. Yeah. Doesn't, doesn't speak well to the Coast Guard's ability to live within an hour, right? Yeah. And this is definitely, you definitely want to back for free if they take more than an hour. Wow. And those are expensive.

Now, this is definitely a one of those action movies to where the villain shoots or allows people to live at the whims of the screenplay. Yeah. Yeah. The, the, I think that the walkie talkie thing where he's talking to Coast Guard. It's, I realize now it's there to pay off early on. He says the US Marshall. Oh, you're from Virginia, but you grew up in this place, and that's why your accent sounds like that. And I guess he's supposed to be like mimicking his accent

over the call, but it just sounds like his regular voice. And it's like, I don't buy him as like a Hannibal Lecter level like, chameleon, you know. It just sounds kind of friendlier. Over radio, the Coast Guard is gonna be like, wait a minute

This isn't a Virginia accent. I'm looking at your Facebook page and it doesn't it says that you grew up in Virginia You don't sound like a virginian. Yeah, I called up a YouTube thing one of those ones where someone explains a bunch of accents And this doesn't sound like Virginia. See, I was catfish this one time. And ever since I'm an extra careful, fool me once. So when you. So where we have our big climax, that's right. We're back in Nicholas Cage's Menagerie room, filled with empty cages and a couple of tape ears and monkeys. The irony thing is, I'm short in the cages how he does have a menagerie room.

I'm sure he does. So he's running around shooting Lawffler with blowgun darts. He manages to get a couple of them in him before they both whip out knives and we have a knife fight. It's looking tight, but eventually the poison manages to whittle down Lawffler, who gets his ankle stuck in a noose, and then he gets hauled up, and then left to be a meal for a white jag who shows up, and it's like, thanks for the handoff, dude,

and then he gets Nicholas Cage to hide. Tag him, tag him, tag me in. Yeah. I do want to say, I mean, it's hard, this movie is shot very daily. Oh, well, yeah. And so it's hard to tell what's a stunt man, but when I do see Nicholas it's hard, this movie is shot very evenly. Oh, yeah. And so it's hard to tell what's a stunt man, but when I do see Nicholas Cage's face, I'm like, oh yeah, not bad, not bad, Nick Cage.

I mean, he's 56 years old. He's not in his prime con air shape, but he's doing well. Yeah. One of the earlier fights between him and Laughler, Laughler's about to shoot him and Nick Cage jumps up and slaps the gun out of the way and launches himself. And that one moment, I was like, that was a really, like, I was impressed by that move. I was like, the speed and the aim and that move. The director was a guy who was a stunt director and coordinator, I think, previously. And so I was like, oh, this checks out, yeah.

Something I want to mention about the Jaguar, because this is our last opportunity. Every now and then you get to see a little bit of Jaguar vision. And it is like blurry and it's like fish eye and black and white. And I'm like, so the ultimate hunter in the jungle sees worse than I do. I mean, these glasses like, this is ridiculous. Yeah, it was the that play at the end to get him

into the loop. Like you could, he was really telling a graphic, like telegraphing it. Like he was borderline like, a little to the left. And then, and then I turned and said to my wife who graciously watch this movie. And I said, you know, in screenwriting, sometimes you save the cat, sometimes the cat saves you. And again, the joke for no one to enjoy, yeah, I have to say it aloud. So it didn't poison my brain.

Yeah. Luckily you saved it for the podcast. So you defuse that poison out among multiple people. So it's not dangerous. It's just irritating. Yeah, ring goose. It's more of a primal bush master level of venom. So Nicholas Cage has saved the day.

A bunch of guys show up. They're like, oh, cool. Well, you can leave with all your treasured animals as long as we see your paperwork. And he's like, and then Fomke-Gensen shows up and was like, a lawfuler burned his paperwork, which is awesome. What an awesome lie.

Great. I'm encouraging this fucking poacher. Well done. And he's like, oh, man, maybe we're going to maybe we're going to get married or something. I don't know. Like, does he, does he talk about how he's like, oh, maybe I'm going to go to the same place she's at. So we can start this dating and earnest. Yeah. Well, she gives him about it. When she gives him her number in a Delphi in case he's ever around there. And he says

whose party is like, they've got a zoo in a Delphi because we learned earlier, he worked at what eight zoos in 10 years. Eight zoos in 10 years. Because that's so funny. It's such a funny detail. And she's like, you have a problem with a thyroid, yeah, eight zoos in 10 years.

I want to see so badly the prequel of primal that's got like primal beginnings for just him as like the sheetiest zoo employee. He's like always getting his boss mad at him. Like he just can't remember to close the door on the guerrilla cage or something. And they get out like, you know, like in what world do you even get hired

at zoo number six? Yeah. Five years. Yeah. I think this is a profession where they keep giving you chances. It's a priests and cops where you just like kill an endangered animal.

Are you kill a fucking iguana? And then they just like move you to another palace. Yeah. Transform, transform to San Diego. Anything goes over there. Yeah, yeah. Okay, Nicholas Cage, you're gonna have to turn out your pockets. Yeah, no, I see the zoo book stuffed in your pockets.

No, no, you didn't bring those from home. I know you stole those. You stuck in here. So he's doing the interviews, too. You're saying it's his job interview, and he's cheating off of a zoo book. That's stuffed in his pocket. I was just saying that he worked in the gift shop at the zoo.

Oh, I see, I see. He's just stealing copies of the magazine, and he's like a badass. Zoo employees, like, you know, I've met Ranger Rick. He's a fucking animal. I mean, yeah, he's a raccoon, right? Yeah. Yeah, but like, he's a raccoon, right? Yeah. He is a raccoon.

Like, he's a sat. I want to say this ending too is what I referred to before where they make a slight stab at making you think, oh, this, this poachers and so bad because he's like, oh, I'm going to take this cat to a reserve for endangered animals. I'm not going to sell it to a zoo for big money You know, okay, great. I guess you're wonderful now You're not gonna have your you're You're not gonna get your house to show up your dad I mean I'm glad he has change of heart, but it does seem like just an afterthought of the movie like okay, and he's

Not not bad bad he's okay. Dude wait did we talk about that I forget about how his his motivation behind buying a house is to be so his dad can come over and not use his fishing boat and he can just show him how great his life is to make his dad mad about it. Yeah I get it. It's so funny like this whole thing is to spite his partner. Like there's all these threads that they can there's like a bunch of balls that they It's so funny. Like this whole thing is to spite his partner. Like there's all these threads that they can.

There's like a bunch of balls that they throw in the air and then don't even try to get. They're just like, hey, check out how many balls we threw. That's pretty cool. He's a super badass. He's a super badass hunter who has serious daddy issues and cannot hold a job at a zoo. He's just like, he's got a lot of that.

There's a parrot that follows him around. It's not his parrot until the end of the movie where he names them. They're kind of frenemies. And then Femke Johnson's character is that your is that your parent Frank? No, he's kind of a frenemy. Am I? We went to college together. We like hang out when he's in town.

But I don't even know why. I mean, like he'll be in town. Get this he'll be in town. He'll call me to hang out on the last night when he's in town. But I don't even know why. I mean, like he'll be in town, get this, he'll be in town. He'll call me to hang out on the last night when he's about to leave. And he's like, hey, hey, can I stay at your place? And it's like, you weren't gonna get in touch with me until the place you were staying fell through.

Were you? But I let him, because, you know, we've got those memories, you know? And we went out to dinner and like the check came and I'm like, I don't know, 50, 50 is fine, right? Like, I guess, but like, he doesn't even reach for that thing. He just lets me pick it up every time. That parrot, we go out for topus, our group of friends, and he just put down like eight bucks and be like, I gotta run, this should cover me.

And if we each have to pay like $60, and that's the thing, I don't know how to do that. I have any drinks. Oh yeah, like that makes up for it. I've come to enjoy topus as I've made my way in the world and now can't go out for Topus on occasion, but man, when I was young, what a bad idea for a group of friends to go out for Topus. Yeah, it's terrible.

I mean, it's essentially a scam, whether like here is your dinner. It is for tiny pieces of something, and that will be $75. But there's five of us. Have you ever been to a place where you don't know that it's top of your, oh, this place looks good, the menu looks good, all the food is a regular price,

and then it comes and it's like, is this a prank? I remember visiting friends in Portland, and they were like, we gotta go to this restaurant, it's great, we'll go for brunch, and I'm like, I could really go for a big brunch, love it. What do I have? And then we sit Portland and they were like, we gotta go to this restaurant, it's great, we'll go for brunch. And I'm like, I could really go for a big brunch, love it. What do I have? And then we sit down and they're like,

and the waitress says, now we are a small plates family style sharing restaurant and I almost walked out of the restaurant. I was so mad. I felt like I'd been brought there under such false pretenses. This is quality like 90s CBS style jokes here, guys. Every smile I

still amad about it. I'm as mad about it as Paul Reiser was mad about it on mad about you I imagine. No no but that was a different kind of mad. I'm crazy for Tava. Small plates and family style always go together and it's like what is this a depression great depression Team dress? Yeah, there's only a little bit of food and we all have to share it look guys We've got it. This is gonna cost us a lot of money. We've got to stretch it. We got to make it last So don't nobody degree greedy now what if Matt about you was originally called Matt at you and it was about to a couple that

Needed a divorce for they refused to divorce because their apartment was so great and the CBS was like we love it We were wondering if the couple could be in love still and Paul Reiser is like, how am I going to make this work? How can I possibly make this work? I mean, you watch that show. They're barely in love. That would have been a good name for it, barely in love. We've want to start bears.

So let's close the book on this guy. Yeah, it's a movie. It's your final judgments about whether it's a good bad movie, a bad bad movie, a movie we kind of liked. I this, you know, as always, barely fits into any of these categories. Like I was watching it as, you know, Audrey got bored pretty quickly and then she was like, this is bad, bad, right? I'm and she's like, and then she's like, or did I not pay much enough attention to it? And I'm like, well, the fact that you stop paying attention to it indicates that yes, it is boring in a lot of ways, but you probably would enjoy it more if you like, engage with it. Like, there's stuff in it that I liked. I liked Nicholas Cage. I like the villain. Fomka Jansen doesn't get a whole lot to do,

but I like her as a presence in movies, and she felt like nice and competent. You're like, she just exuded competence in it. I, and whenever it went big, it was kind of fun. But so much of this movie just like does not engage with what makes the premise fun. The premise is fun because there's a bunch of these animals loose on this damn ship. And that feels like an afterthought. Like most of it is just like walking through like warehouse, like the hold of the ship with guns, you know, and it's

poorly lit, poorly shot. So, you know, sometimes I kind kind of liked it sometimes I thought it was just bad. What do you guys have to say? Yeah I'm with you Dan. I would say I don't know. I think this is a movie I actually kind of liked. It's like dumb in a way that I enjoy. It is as Josh said like it throws a bunch of balls in the air. It does not really care if they catch any of them. It's like their action scenes are not particularly thrilling, but it was like, I don't know, it was dumb and exactly the way I want a movie I watch for the flab has to be. And, uh, yeah, the actors were fun to watch, kind of act in the movie. Yeah, thumbs up.

Yeah, it's, it's like a thumbs sideways movie. It's like not, it feels really like, you know what, like we've said it before, like I'm sick, I'm lying on the couch, it's a Saturday afternoon, this is available. Okay, sure, this will be fine. It like, it's never quite what Stolen is, you know, but it's like kind of like Stolen.

Yeah, it's one of those movies that's sort of fun, but you won't be mad if you fall asleep. For sure, the perfect way to do it. It's like, however much of the movie you watch, you'll enjoy that much. It's like a continental breakfast movie. I mean, I think it's a better movie if you fall asleep for a certain amount of it, because it's like a repetitive movie where, like you said, damn, it doesn't live up to the premise of they're trapped on a ship with a killer and a bunch of killer animals. Like, so it's kind of like, if you watch the beginning of it and then fell asleep and dreamed most of the movie

and then woke up for the very end, you probably have a pretty positive experience that you'd have a better story. Yeah. I don't think it was a bad, bad movie because there was, at no point was I like, like mad that I was watching it. It like, it's 97 minutes. There's like enough fun stuff where was I like, like mad that I was watching it. It's 97 minutes.

There's like enough fun stuff where I'm like, ah, the, the, he tees that the snakes were there and then the snakes, great. Um, he, he, he's got a bow and shoots a guy through the shoulder and the bow and he pushes the arrow through his shoulder. It's like, just like, I, I, so I don't, but I also don't think it's good.

Like, like, good bad movie in that it's not tight. It doesn't pay off the stuff you want it to pay off. The, the, the Michael Imperialie stuff, the, uh, the parrot saying, talking about the gun, doesn't like pay off in a very satisfying way. But I do think I, my dad has a phrase for a movie like this, where he describes it as heaven. I texted this to him immediately after I finished.

I said, if you've seen Primal of Nichols Cage, it's got a lot of good beaten up. And it felt very 90s. Like it felt like here's the premise, we're just gonna do more or less do that for 90 minutes. And then you're gonna go home and you're gonna forget whether it was this one or that one that the monkeys ate the cook.

Yeah, I do think that like there is something to it might just be pure nostalgia of like us all being the same sort of general generation. Like these sorts of action movies were more of a part of our youth and now, you know, like anything that isn't a big blockbuster does get sort of shunted off like this film did. And so I do think that yeah, I am more apt to be gentle on a movie like this too because I'm like, oh, you know, like a basic action movie with like a premise, but not like a lot of bells and whistles. Yeah, I like that kind of thing and I'm happy. I think it was it did a good enough job where that it wasn't like Super it wasn't perfectly executed, but also I didn't feel like I was being insulted watching it Yeah, where they were just like look some idiots gonna watch this on a plane and and that's when we make the money or like whatever I so I will say I kind of like did it Dan like you said a nostalgia for those

Dan, like you said, a nostalgia for those Segal, Van Dam, Cage movies of like the mid-90s. And basically no animals got killed in the movie, right? Basically, those two parrots, right? Oh yeah. Lawfler does shoot two parrots, point blank, but- The least, I think they chose that specifically, right? Because they couldn't kill the snakes for plot reasons, and they were like, we can't kill them, mammal, that's fucked up.

Yeah. People won't stand for it. Yeah. right? Because they couldn't kill the snakes for plot reasons and they were like, we can't kill a mammal, that's fucked up. Yeah. People won't stand for it. Yeah. Hi, it's me, Dave Hill from Before. Here to tell you about my brand new show on Maximum Fun, The Dave Hill Good Time Hour, which combines my old Maximum Fun Show, Dave Hill's podcasting incident with my old radio show, The God Damn Dave Hill Show, and Phil's podcasting incident with my old radio show,

The God Damn Dave Hill Show, and a one new futuristic program from the future. If you like delightful conversations with incredible guests, technical difficulties, and actual phone calls from real life listeners, you've just hit a street called Easy. I'm also joined by my incredible co-host, the Boy Criminal Chris Grispect. Say hi Chris. Hey Dave, it's really great to see you. That's enough, Chris. And New Jersey Chicken Rancher, Des. Say hi, Des. Hey, Dave.

Dave Hill, good time, our brand new episodes every Friday on Maxim Fun. Plus, the show's not even an hour. It's 90 minutes. Take that stupid rule. We nailed it. Does our podcast deep dive into the weirdest Wikipedia pages we can find? Yes! Do we learn about scam artists, remote islands, forrable mascots, beautiful diseases, and mythical monsters? Yes, yes, yes, absolutely, and yes!

Do we retain any of this knowledge? Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo To make art and comedy and TV shows and also the podcast Baby Geniuses. For the past 8 years, we've been trying to learn new things about the world and each other every episode. But let's be honest, this podcast is mostly about two friends hanging out, shooting the breeze, and making each other laugh. We're horny, we like gardening and horses, and we get real stupid on here. But like in a smart way. Yeah, join us every other week on Maximum Fun. I think we have a couple of jumbo trons this week. The biggest of trons.

Stuart, parents don't know that he started out in the Japanese Comics Anthology magazine, weekly Shonen Jump. But for every Dragon Ball Z, there's a series that died in obscurity. Why? On each episode of the podcast, Shonen flop. David and Jordan read a cancelled jump series and determine if it was a forgotten gem or if it was really, truly, a flop. Please do not sue us over the title. So subscribe to Shonen Flop on your podcast app of choice and follow our Twitter at Shonen Flopcast. Wow, you gave it to me

because I'm the ultimate otaku. That's the thing, Colin, ultimate otaku. I have a jumbo tram too. So maybe this is the same kind of niche nerd excitement. Let's go. Okay, so if you'd rather buy from local businesses than corporate websites, Suk lets you do it with one click. A free shopping assistant for Chrome, Suk makes it easy to browse and buy from the best small businesses in your community. Whether you're looking for clothing, home decor, kids gear or more, Suk makes it easy, convenient and affordable to spend your money where you live. Suk is free for small businesses and the communities that love them.

No small business we should add? Just email us. So go download Sook as SOOK for free from the Chrome store. That's SOOK from the Chrome store. And I think, Elliot, you had a quick plug that you wanted to do? I did. So I have a comic book series coming out next year from Aftershock Comics. It's called Maniac of New York, and it is available for pre-order now. So call up your local comic book store, say, hey, I want to get Maniac of New York. It's kind of a take about a masked killer who is running loose in Manhattan, taking Manhattan, if you will. It's a completely original idea based on nothing. And it is by me,

and the great artist Andrea Moote, who you may know from Hellblazer among other things. I'm very excited about it. It comes out next year from Aftershock Comics, maniac of New York, pre-order it now. And is it inspired or related in any way to the short comic we did our batch of charity comics that are available on our website? Yes.

Great. That's a good point. If you want to get kind of a sneak peek of it, there is a comic book of the same name on our available on our Flop House website. Yes, great. That's a good point. If you want to get kind of a sneak peak of it, there is a comic book of the same name on our available on our Flop House website. You can buy it now and all the money goes to charity. That was kind of a demo run, you might say, for this. That was kind of like me brainstorming ideas that I am then using in a greater narrative

sense in this one. So, yeah, good call Stewart. If you want a sneak peek, just go do that and all that money will go to a good cost. If you're a sneak peek freak. Let us move on to letters from listeners like you. Anyway, this first one is from... Anyway, this first one is from... You seem like you were opening that up for a... What you said had a lot of like closure to it and then suddenly you opened it up in a way that maybe asked questions about what was going on in the situation. Yeah, well I mean, you don't know.

It became ambiguous. It was very concrete and became ambiguous. If you're listening, you know, you don't know maybe this was your letter. And tell you hear it, it's like a road to Schrodinger's letter. Schrodinger's letter. Well, Schrodinger's letter was Deer Petco. I'm not sure if my cat is a livery kid. How do I find out? And Petco is like, dude, this is not on us.

Does Schrodinger's head is... I want a refund or maybe I don't. It depends on what happens when I open the box. Schrodinger have really nice handwriting because he's a really good pianist, right? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Let's make it practice.

We don't have to. I was in the process of thinking, is there a Schroeder joke here? And I had decided there wasn't, so I'm glad that you jumped in. So this letter is from Trevor, not Noah, last name with held Which only makes me think it's more likely yeah, yeah, yeah, possibly yeah, does he prefer you as employee Dan

You should you should read it in his accent Dan Just in case it's It would be a salted not to do a South African accent is so hard. Yeah, no one's ever done one. So this, yeah, from Trevor, not no last name withheld, Hey, Peaches, I'm a big fan of the flopphouse, but my wife has only heard bits and pieces, usually while writing in the car together. We had just finished watching a TV show, and out of nowhere,

she looked over at me and said, BOW! MAMAU! I thought maybe this had something to do with our cat who was sitting nearby, but what I didn't respond she stared at me and smiled. Okay, I said, not sure what she was expecting, louder this time. B, ma-mow, you know, like the cat. I thought about the thousands of cats I know, both real and big, some real. I never thought she would bring up your show. From the flop house, she said, she was very excited

to use a reference to something I liked. Oh, I responded, no, it's rural, but she was not deterred. I told her I would write this. I told her I would write this email, and she hasn't stopped escorting the beloved house cat ever since. There's no deep philosophical question here. I thought you guys might enjoy knowing there's some portion of the population that is acquainted with your podcast,

even if they don't know the details. Thanks for keeping me sane in 2020, Trevor. Okay. So I think there is a 50, 50 chance. They were either watching blue bloods or MasterChef Jr. What do you guys think? Like why are you?

I mean, I'm showing your work on this. Are we betting on this? Are you asking us, are we supposed to take that action? I need to see, Elliot, pull some money out. I need proof that you're actually good for it. Okay, well, all right, let's go round table. Say what show we think that they're watching, and if any of us gets right,

this letter writer must write in. So you're saying either blue bloods or what was the one? MasterChef Jr. obviously. Was there a cat on the show? I just got totally derailed by how he knows thousands of cats. I don't think I saw the bright. Well, he didn't know the bright. I don't think I saw the bright.

Well, he didn't know the bright. I don't think I saw the bright. I don't think I saw the bright. I don't think I saw the bright. I don't think I saw the bright. I don't think I saw the bright. I don't think I saw the bright. I don't think I saw the bright.

I don't think I saw the bright. I don't think I saw the bright. I don't think I saw the bright. I don't think I saw the bright. I don't think I saw the bright. I don't think I saw the bright. I don't think I saw the bright. I don who has been to the UCB theater at some point in the early 2000s who might have seen that show. I'm gonna say they were watching the repair shop, which is a very comforting show on Netflix. I'm gonna say it was either Young Sheldon or Dark. They're kind of the same show. Yep. Josh, do you have a guess here?

I feel like they said he said watching TV, but I think on TV they were watching the movie inside Louis Davis. Wow. There is a cat in it. All right. There's a cat shooting film. There are a couple of cats. Now I'm just excited because this means we have reached that legendary status where people are regularly misquoting us and thinking that they're quoting us are sure like that's our play it again Sam you know is mum is about from out cheers that's from cheers yeah when the

episode where he brought in his sousa phone he was trying to return to baseball the that like some someday in the future, someone's gonna go, there's gonna be some, you know, BuzzFeed article that's like, bow, m-mow, here's what they were actually saying on the flop house. Yeah.

It's a real Mandela effect. Yeah. Oh, let me, I was, follows my Twitter account, we'll know that I have a beef about this, which is that I think it's real unfair that Nelson Mandela, a global hero of freedom, that his name got put on the effect that is basically just people being like, no, oh.

Right. Oh, the Mandela effect. Do you mean bringing liberation to a people and oppressed people in a nation against all of us? Not a man. No, no, no, no. It's showing incredible resilience and endurance for decades until finally the moral arc of the universe spends towards better. No, no, it's showing incredible resilience and endurance for decades until finally the

moral arc of the universe spends towards justice. No, no, no, it's about thinking that it's barren steam bears. So I want to, I'm trying to create a movement that the Mandela effect becomes the name for when you get superhuman strength to lift a car off of a child that's been pinned under it. Let's see if it works out. Everybody, that's the Mandela effect now. Okay. Well, and the other one is the Bob Illumand Del effect when you when you remember something wrong

That's now named after screenwriter Bob Illumand Del writer of Gunho among other movies. Who who's the other member of that team? Oh, Gans. Yeah, okay. Gantle McGanson Mandel. Yeah Funniest funniest names in comedy writing teams. As it's been, I think they got the jobs off the names. Yeah. But Lumandale sounds like a, uh, something that Dennis Miller would have said a lot in the 80s. Yeah.

Yeah. The sky makes little gantle look like Babelou Mandel. That's pretty good. And someone's like, Dennis, they work together. They're not that different. The sky makes low-glance look like Babaloo Mandel. That's pretty good. Someone's like, Dennis, they work together. They're not that different. Uh-huh. Uh-huh.

So, this next and final letter is from Heather, last name withheld. And Heather writes, How do you all have such nice teeth? Are they natural? Thanks, Heather. I will start. I can only answer for myself. I had braces. Answer for me Dan. I probably didn't wear my retainer as much as I should so they're drifting a little back crooked as I age but that's my story.

What about you guys? My story is very exciting and different. I also had braces, and my teeth are also drifting back. And on my bottom jaw, one of the teeth, it's drifting, but you can only feel it from the back. If you look from the front, I don't think you can tell. So that's a little secret I have, is that my tongue is constantly caressing the place for two of my teeth overlap. Pretty erotic, huh?

Mm-hmm. Sure. Oh, I thought Josh was going gonna talk about my teeth, but I We're saving that for our podcast That's where I go through my collection of antique teeth Yeah, so I also had braces, but interestingly I didn't have braces until I was like 18. I had to have corrective surgery because I developed an under bite late in life, late in life as in 2017.

Yeah. That's it. You've been dead for a couple decades, right? Yeah, yeah. That's late in life in medieval times, sure. Yeah, you had your surgery. Yeah, you had your surgery. I did. So I had a corrective jaw surgery where they put me under and they like peeled my lips back

and then they had to cut my lower jaw and push it backwards and cut my upper jaw and pull it out a little bit. And that's why when you look at me, you're like, why does he look like a perfect specimen of a human? Well, it's because it's all, it's created by science. It's not, you know, yeah. Now would you recommend this procedure, Stuart? I mean, look at the results.

He's super handsome. Yeah, I mean, I think they speak for themselves. Although I do remember waking up from that surgery and immediately vomiting a mixture of the pizza I'd eaten the day before and blood. So I don't recommend that part. I do remember waking up from that surgery and immediately vomiting a mixture of the pizza I'd eaten the day before and blood. So I don't recommend that part. I was like a vampire and incheter.

Yeah, absolutely. What? This listener got more than they bargained for with their question. Stewart, you reminded me of a surgery I had forgotten about where my teeth were not coming in fast enough for my orthodontist liking. So they pulled two of my teeth,

cut open the gums and put brackets on teeth that had not come out yet, and they slowly pulled those teeth down with little chains like over time. Yeah, very normal. I love the idea that this is the type of question that somebody's used to asking at parties and is like super bummed that they turned

to a long conversation. Jordan, go back and put a content warning in for tooth violence, please. Josh, you also have great teeth. Thank you. I'm feeling my teeth are fine. Here's, this is my dental secret. When I was like a tween, I had a couple teeth that just didn't I have like two fewer teeth than I should Not a brag

So they were like look there's a little extra space in your mouth We could give you braces, but that's the whole thing or we could shave down your two fang like teeth next to your front teeth So that they'll they'll just be a little stumpy, but we won't have to put the whole thing in to line them up. And my parents and I were like, yeah, do the weird thing that no one's ever done. And so I'm not very self-conscious,

but whenever I think about my teeth, I remember that the two teeth next to my front teeth are just short little guys. They're like, we like little sidekick teeth. Okay. So there you go. Some of you were horrified, some of you were all roused. I love it.

I love it. That some people listen to our show as they're going to sleep and this will certainly affect their dreams. Let me, no, let me, let me cute this up with some cute teeth talk. My older son, Sammy, he has lost both of his front two teeth. So he's got a super classic adorable kid face. But with the second tooth, we put under his pillow and he wrote a letter to the tooth fairy asking if this tooth fairy was the same tooth fairy that took his last tooth.

And the letter he got in response explained that it's the same tooth fairy because this is the tooth fairy that handles california and there are different tooth fairies for every state and major city and he was and country and he was very excited about learning that so there's a network of tooth fairies out there all working regionally let's support him as best we can in these hard times You know New Jersey tooth fairy Michael and periodly He'll sometimes come when the teeth aren't ready to come out yet. He'll just stick his hand in his mouth and be like, come on, legal it out buddy, come on, get it out of there. They're coming out sometime. And then he takes a big roll of bills out of his pocket, not in a wallet and just peels off two ones and throws

them onto the bed and walks out. Let's do the final segment of the show, which is recommendations. If you want something, maybe a little better than primal. Is that possible? Who knows? Well, let's see. In honor of Cajemus, fortunately, I actually watched a watched a Nicholas Cage movie that I had not seen before. I'm surprised I hadn't seen before. It took me a very long time, but I watched Valley Girl, which I enjoyed quite a bit. I grew up with these 80s teen comedies,

and so it was nice to find one that I hadn't seen before that I could enjoy that also was like had like a very minimal like objectionable amount of stuff at like there's nothing in that upset me. I mean Nick Cage gets a little stalkery at the end but other than that it's it's my number one hamburger bite I've ever seen the movie. It's also ranked next to my favorite snakes if you're wondering. It's in my journal. It's number one behind two other hamburger bites from other foods. You're never going to hear the last hamburger.

If only a snake bit of bush mass are biting into a hamburger. Why haven't we seen that movie? Yeah. Oh my God. That's going to be my next tattoo. You know that you know the Lum air brothers were like this is why we created this medium to see a snake bite into embelliger and it's just hasn't happened yet. So this movie is from 1983. A lot of people probably know about it

already so I won't go too much into it but it's a it was made to capitalize on the brief cultural fascination with the idea of the Valley Girl, which came out of, in some part, the Frank Zappa, Moon Unit, Zappa, Song Valley Girl, which is really like sort of shitty and snide about Valley Girls in a way that the movie is not at all. It's structured by Martha Coolidge, and I think it's one of these cases where having a woman director do this movie that focuses in large part on this young girl allows her to be a little more complex than otherwise would be the case otherwise they could just be making fun of this

but it's a Romeo and Juliet tale of Valley Girl falls for a punk from the Valley played by Nicholas Cage. And two things I want to say about it is like number one, I think movies get punk-s wrong a lot of the time. Like I feel like in movies they're just shown as these forces of aggression. And you know, the punks that I knew from college, I feel like a lot of them used this aggressive stance to cover up for a lot of sensitivity. This is like their way of kind of dealing with the world. And Nicholas Cage felt like one of these people I could have known. And I also want to say that, you know, just at the beginning of his career, sometimes you forget what a dreamboat this guy was. Like, you look at him in this movie.

He's got beautiful eyes, and you can see how like, there's no way this young woman would not fall for this guy. Like, he is, he just wants to be with her. He is so sweet. And it's just a really sweet movie that you know that these kids aren't gonna say together. This is a high school romance, but it's a movie that is as much about,

I think the lead becoming a better person and learning what it is to strike out and make your own path as it is about the romance. So I was touched by it. It's a lot of fun. I'm gonna go on the similar theme of Good Nicholas Cage movies from the 80s. And this is one that maybe a lot of people have seen.

It escaped my viewing. I was trying for years, but it kept escaping. Yeah. Every time you thought you'd catch it, you'd go to the snare and it would be empty with just like some drops of blood, but it chewed its way out. You know, I don't do note.

Mr. Gondolman, you should have caught me. I gave you all the clues. And some such. But Moonstruck, which like a classic that I've missed out on, my early this year, my wife had been like oh let's watch moon Strict like we we had a night stuff to watch a movie she's like how do moon struck and I said sure I didn't know anything about it the only thing I knew is it's either the one where Nicholas Cage eats the bug or it's not and Folks it's not

She share and Nicholas Cage play people living in a Share and Nicholas Cage play people living in a Like Bay Ridge Brooklyn in the 80s very Italian neighborhood shares Fianc share gets engaged her fiance Leaves to go see his grandmother. I think in Italy and he's he tasks her with inviting his estranged brother Nicholas Cage to their wedding and when she does he is unreasonable and sexually magnetic and it's like he said like I felt like I did some bagging on Nicholas Cage for being you know older

slightly older than middle aged and like a little Dechevilled and primal but this is Nicholas Cage where you're like, oh, this guy gets after it. He really brings it in the sack. And it's like kind of the central theme of the movie is Nicholas Cage is so good at sex. He'll change your life. Yeah, the whole course of your life. Yeah, you're like, that's what a white tanked up is supposed to look like on a person. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that movie's so much fun. I saw it for the first time as well during quarantine, which is still going on, obviously.

And it had been one of my wife's favorite movies, so we got to watch it together. And it was like the moment when it clicked that it's basically like a Shakespearean comedy but set in Brooklyn. That's when I was Shakespearean comedy, but set in Brooklyn. That's when I was like, oh, I get this movie and I like it a lot. Yeah. And his, the scene that introduces him is like, I think about it all the time now. Yeah. The scene where she comes to his bakery, or the bakery where he works to invite him to the wedding. And he's just like, it's big cage, but it also is big cage in a way that like is within the scope of like what he's supposed to do in this movie.

Yeah, it's great. I also want to just give a little behind the scenes. You know, we're using Skype for this called God knows why because many better Things exist now but with the Skype reactions Dan. Dan. It's inertia Yeah, the Skype reactions when I said Valley girl and when Josh said moon struck both times Stewart did the heart reaction It was like oh quick. I got a show. My much. I love it. Yeah Without interrupting Yeah, so I'm going to I'm gonna break the chain I got to show him how much I love it. Yeah. Without interrupting. Yeah.

So I'm going to, I'm going to break the chain. And I am going to recommend a new movie that does not feature necklace cage. I'm going to recommend a movie called Sound of Metal. It's on Amazon Prime right now. It's about a young punk rock drummer played by Riz Ahmed, who starts to lose his hearing and he has to figure out a way to kind of live a life as a deaf person and this is a character that as we get to know him we realize that being a drummer and that sort of thing had

also been kind of a way for him to run away from other past issues. And it's a fairly straightforward drama, but it's shot beautifully, and it has a couple of very amazing performances, including from Riz Ahmed, who just looks so man like a whole dang meal this guy. And the also I want to mention that my buddy Harry did some of the drum work for it. So I get to continue the recent trend of Stewart name dropping people involved in movies that he likes. He did it.

Good job. Thank you. Thank you. Name dropped. Sound of the name. As the sound of the name dropping. I'm going to mention, I'm also not going to recommend an Nicholas Cage movie, but because the endropping. I'm gonna mention I'm also not gonna recommend an endless cage movie But because it's cage miss. I'm recommending a movie that partly takes place at Christmas

So that's a connection, I guess This is I'm gonna recommend the movie the silent partner from 1978 Sorry, Elliott Gould Christopher Plummer in Susanne, York, which is a I don't want to talk too much about the plot, because it's twisty and turny. But essentially, Ellie Gold is a mild-mannered bank teller who decides he's going to take advantage of the fact that he suspects that a man, play by Christopher Plumber, is planning to rob the bank to actually kind of pre-rob the bank and gets involved in vengeance and twisty turns and things like that. And it's really good.

It is, even though it is listed as a comedy in some places, it is not a comedy. It is a very, it's a thriller that is both super smart and very well made and also kind of sleazy in an enjoyable way. There's like, it's a pretty respectable sleazy thriller that has two scenes that are gruesome. There's two violent scenes that, where women are the targets,

that I'll award you about. One of which enters into like, geolot territory for a moment. But Christopher Plummer is super scary in it. And Elliot Gould is very good in it as a kind of not bumbling guy but a believably like guy who got himself in too deep and you get to see beautiful Canada in the late 70s and the house interiors and clothing implied by that. And features a performance by an actress named Selene Lomance, who I was not super familiar with,

and she's great in it, and she plays a character who has more going on with her than it seems at first. But the silent partner, if you're interested in a taught thriller that is, you know, just that a great slice of 70s movies you could do worse than that, I'd recommend it. Yeah, I appreciate, like that is like a meme movie in a lot of ways, which is what I,

I mean, if it's a comedy, it's a comedy in the sense like a very, very dry sense in the way that people who love thrillers, I think will sort of chuckle at how like brutal it is. At meme things that happen to people, yeah. But I would not, but it is a thriller. And like I watched it being like, I that happened to people. Yeah, but I would not but it is a it's a thriller and like I watched it being like oh I've heard of this movie before but I don't really know much about it

And it's listed as like a comedy thriller and like almost instantly. I'm like this is not a funny like this is great But this is not a funny movie even though John candy is in it in a small role not being funny It's a impossible. Yeah I mean he's got candy in his name for God's sakes. He does have candy in his name. And, uh, the fun he is moving. And Christopher Plummer manages to be like, just every time he's on screen, genuinely, like, you know, frightening and eerie, you know, eerie in a way that I did not expect.

Do you think when they made the Super Mario Brothers movie, uh, Christopher Plummer was mad that he didn't get hired to play Mario because he's like, I'm a plumber, it's in my name. You know he sent his tape in and he's like, I should have worn a mustache when I did the audition. That was my problem. Hey, I didn't wear a mustache on my tape. So.

You know, Elliot, you were just like sort of gesturing out of Christopher Plummer voice, but I could at the same time hear it. I really, I think I'm captured something there. I really, I think, capture something there. Thank you, I appreciate that. There's one moment in this movie. I'll just tell you how it got at me, particularly, where Christopher Plumber knows where Elliot Gould lives. And he is, he's always calling him from a pay phone outside

that he can see him from. And Christopher Plumber comes up into the hallway and starts talking to him through the mail slot. And it is, was so frightening to me, the idea that it's like, oh, there's just a door between these two guys. And they're looking at each other through the mail slot. And it was so frightening to me the idea that it's like, oh, there's just a door between these two guys and they're looking at each other through this mail slot. And it's like a, it just, it's like a tapped into the same thing that is like,

when you have a dream where you're going to the bathroom but someone can see you going to the bathroom, like that kind of fear of exposure. The ultimate fantasy, yeah. Yeah. I mean, not for me, but so anyway, but it's just there are little things like that. They're like super creepy. And then the movie gets, yeah, very brutal. So that's my recommendation. Cool. Well, guys, Josh, it's been

a like such a pleasure to have you on. Is there a thing or multiple things you would like to plug? Oh, thank you. Sure. And this has been such a pleasure for me. I'm such a fan of the show and I really enjoyed hanging out and talking about an engage. I have a podcast called Make My Day. It's a comedy game show where there's only one contestant or two contestants playing as a team. So the contestants always win. I have a book called Nice Try that's an essay collection that I'm very proud of and still exists. And Deezis and Merrow comes back on January 31st for season three and I'm very excited and I think it's a fun show that people might like if they haven't tried it. Yeah, it was a big part of my quarantine was watching their current episodes and then

catching up with some of the old ones. They're so funny. And I say that like, I'm very proud of the show and like the work that we do on it, obviously the whole team does, but also it's just like watching the tapings because they're so spontaneous. I laugh a lot just like, well, I wouldn't have come up with that. It's like a very funny way to feel about a show

that you write for. I was doing a show that never ended up going into production for True TV and they were like, we really want the host to have like a real D'sus and Merrow vibe. You have to be like, D'sus and Merrow and I'm like, you're not going to. Like it's not what happened. Like those two guys have that. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, you, we want you to give us the dictionary definition of charisma,

basically. Yeah. You mean two guys who seem like who have like incredible synergy, incredible charisma, incredible chemistry and their their list of references includes everything that's ever happened. Okay, guys, well, yes,, thank you Josh for being here. Thank you to Jordan Cowling for making a sound good by doing editing and sound stuff and all sorts of things I don't understand. If you listen to the podcast, when I did it, you can hear the improvement. Thank you to our network, Maximum Fun. Please rate us on iTunes.

Well, I hope let people know about the show. Check out the other great podcast at maxvumfun.org. And I think that's it. Thank you so much. Another cage miss in the books. I've been Dan McCoy. I've been Stuart Wellington. I I've been steward Wellington. I'm still Ili Kaelin.

Oh, I was, I'm Ben Josh Condelman. I didn't, I didn't want to intrude. This is something we have, we continually forget to tell our guests that they should say their names to it. Yeah, yeah, this happens a lot. I was just thinking this way. I was just thinking I'm like, oh, did we figure it out? Like that seemed like a pretty smooth ending.

Did we figure it out? And then it turns out a pretty smooth ending. Did we figure it out? And then it turns out, we didn't. We nailed it. No, we were walking out of the house, and we said, didn't trip over our own dicks this time, and then suddenly, what was in our path, our own dicks? And I tripped over. Oh.

Ha, ha, ha. See you next time. Bye. See you next time, bye! I'm not an accent guy. I think we covered that in the show. I'm more of a, you know, like a hype man type character. Mm-hmm, yep, yep, for Castle Freight. Yep. [♪ OUTRO MUSIC PLAYING [♪ Maximumfun.org Comedy and Culture Artist-owned, audience supported.