The Flop House - Ep. #351 - Andy the Talking Hedgehog, with Jamelle Bouie

Episode Date: September 11, 2021

America's foremost hedgehog expert, Jamelle Bouie, returns to usher in Smalltember (vember) 2021, with our discussion of the make-work project for Dean Cain and Tara Reid, Andy the Talking Hedgehog.LIVE SHOW ALERT! — We’ll be doing another streaming live show, delivered directly to your computers or whatever you use for these things! Tune in on to watch us discuss the “classic” 1993 flop Super Mario Bros., do a few presentations, take a few questions via Twitter, and other assorted nonsense! Tickets are a mere $10! Hooray!Wikipedia entry for Andy the Talking HedgehogMovies recommended in this episode:The Night HouseSuperhostRise of the Planet of the ApesThe Last Seduction

On this episode we discuss... Andy, the Talking Hedgehog! A Talking Hedgehog! Hey everyone and welcome to the Flop House. I'm Dan McCoy. I'm Stuart Wellington. And I'm Elliott Kaelin with a high energy intro and no wonder because we've got a very special guest with us today. Guys, I have to drop it. The high energy intro and no wonder, because we've got a very special guest with us today. Guys, I have to drop it. The high energy stuff, because my, I think my larynx is gonna explode if I keep it up.

The, I spent so much time yelling at my children that I just, I can't, I'm all out of loud. We're joined by a very special guest today, which is why we're so excited, exoited and excited, exoited is like excited, but a little bit Jewisher. Our guest, Jim Elbowie, New York Times correspondent freelance photographer, and even more importantly, as regular listeners will know, because the subject matter of this episode and his

previous appearance on the show, our regular returning hedgehog correspondent, dealing with all the hedgehog issues, hedgehog culture, hedgehog social analysis, hedgehog politics, Jamel. Before we get in on this movie, Andy, the talking hedgehog, tell me, where do you see hedgehog issues today in America? Well, you know, first of all, we have to discuss the big storming of the Capitol by that mass army of hedgehogs, the Magahedgehogs, the Confederate hedgehogs, The hedgehogs that build that gallows for Mike Pence. Which was doubly ironic since he is himself a hedgehog.

Yes, true. First hedgehog American president. Our vice president. Oh, just you wait. Just you wait. I don't get there. I don't want any guy. Wait, guys, did I forget to mention that I'm a total, I'm a total conservative guy now? I love it all, it's great. Is that why you're pointing at us as much as you are? It is.

I think what I like best about it is the total abdication of responsibility for my own health and the health of others. I think that's really the best thing about it. Anyway, hedgehogs, we'll talk more about hedgehogs and we'll have more really cutting political satire. But first, I want to talk to you about our upcoming live show. That's right, on September 25th at 9 p.m. Eastern, 6 p.m. Pacific.

The Flapp House boys are doing it again. We're going to be on the internet doing it. And by doing it, I mean, talking about Super Mario Brothers, no nudity. Please don't misunderstand when I use the phrase doing it, I mean talking about Super Mario Bros. No nudity, please don't misunderstand when I use the phrase doing it. We're gonna have a live show over the internet, like we've done a few times, but it's gonna be all new material,

all new presentations, all new questions in the audience. We'll tell you more about the show later, but just wanna make sure you're new in case you hadn't heard September 25th, 9 PM Eastern, 6 PM Pacific, to get tickets, either Google SimpleTix, Flop House Mario Bros. or go to flop flop house podcast.com slash

events, and you'll find the link to get tickets. Again, I'll tell you about it more later in the show. But first, let's return to more of this cutting edge political sad time as we talk about Andy, the talking hedgehog. Because Dan, what do we do on this podcast? This is a podcast where we talk about bad movies. We watch a bad movie and we talk about them. And boy, boy, this is a small timber or small, small, small, small,

small, them where we watch smaller movies, movies that normally, you know, we might think, oh, this is, you know, like, like beating up a fish in a barrel, just punching that fish. Not just punching down. I think that's way harder than you're making it sound. I feel like we are, with a movie like this, we are punching so far down, it's like we're burrowing our fist into the ground to hit a corpse in the face. Yeah, in general, in general, we like to take it on something a little larger, but every year we give ourselves a month's dispensation to make fun of something real small.

And in this case, oh boy, it's a small movie in production and a small movie in time, 70 minutes, although when we were watching it, it's costumating. How much of this one cost a minute? How much of this one cost a minute guys? much of this one costs to make, guys? I don't know how much it costs to make. I will say that there's a scene where you can see the address of the house. Oh, it looks it up.

It's hugely large. Yeah, if you look it up, it is this house that you're not put up a fake address. And the way that address is written on the front of the house, it's not just the street number. It is the street number and street name. Yeah. Written across the top above the door, I've never seen that on a house before.

And it belongs to one of the producers of the film, I don't want to get into it. Showing off, but like, stuff. I mean, that makes sense. That's how small the movie is. I mean, but it's a dice, it's a, it's a bigger house than my house, but it is a movie that takes place almost entirely inside and around one house. Yes.

I mean, as far as how much it costs, I feel like it all depends on how much Dean Cain charged, you know? Yes. That is like, you know, gritties for Dean Cain, then I'm, this is like, you know, a $500 movie. Yeah, and this is probably part of Terry's community service for something. I'm betting. So, the, the, the potato chip budget for this fucking movie is through the roof.

And before you say it, yes, a movie shot mostly in and around one house could also be who's afraid of a genuine for bug, but this is not that kind of movie. You know what I'm talking about listeners. Come on. So Dan, tell us a little bit about Andy the talking hedgehog. How does movie come to your attention? Well, you know, with small timber, I have found that the best thing to do these days, now that I have sort of like blown through some of the stuff that I had wanted to see that had been on my radar is to crowdsource it. So I asked a lot of flopp house listeners on our Facebook group to give a suggestions,

got a lot of great suggestions, I went through them all cold it down. But this one I feel like spoke to us and No, that's right. I had my money on you just googled a talking and then auto filled Talking feet Talking wife Yep, a talking talking that worth. We get it. And you were given a selection of movies to choose from. Why did this one speak to you other than your deep and professional interest in hedgehogs? I mean, two reasons. First, I thought it would be funny if I just came back for another hedgehog episode. That was like the overriding one and so it helped

it for 70 minutes but like as soon as I turned it on I was like I made a terrible mistake. I got an email from Joel Mel saying like something like I was that you were 10 minutes into it and you didn't know if you could make it through or something along those lines. And I gotta say that's 70 minutes feels long when you're watching all them 2B commercials, am I right? Oh, that's 70 minutes feels like both parts of Sota Burr's shame film. Okay, well guys, I'm going to be driving this vehicle. Let's see where we're at. So, as I mentioned, watch this shit on to be hell yeah, delivers again.

We got some hot opening credits with footage of hedgehogs. Yeah, as long as we're talking about the opening credits, I wanna mention this is written by George P. Saunders. Not George Saunders. Not the George Saunders of Pastoralia and Lincoln in the Bardow, that's a different George Saunders. That George P. Saunders. I actually has like 40, 30.

I was about screen screenplay credits weirdly, but most of my news were about the similarities between George Saunders' works, so I'm gonna have to add it. Oh, boy. Actually, because to be honest, the George Saunders could write a version of this story where a fairy gives all animals and plants

around one house the ability to talk, and it would probably tell us something bittersweet about the human condition, ultimately, you know? So after the opening credits with footage of hedgehogs, we get a shot with two, I guess, crooks that are stealing a hedgehog with narration from the hedgehog in this, like, how, I bet you're wondering how I got here.

That's exactly what I have in my own. Yeah. Yeah. And then so. But this also, this starts a theme in the movie, which is the hedgehog introducing things, then saying, we'll talk about that later. Exactly.

What the fuck? And how would you describe the voice of the hedgehog still? I mean, I would say 50% there. Yeah. It does, it does. On a cell phone somewhere. It is clearly the director of the movie who also does the other animal voice in it.

And he is clearly trying to channel Lorenzo music as Garfield and it is not quite, it's not coming across, you know. Yeah, there's a, yeah, there's a little bit of like kind of a droopy or dopey or quality. And then like as the cat, it's like, hi, I'm the cat, I mean.

And all I can think about is in that man, the hands of fate, Mr. Science Theater, where Joel's like, that's just one guy doing all the voices back there. Just one guy. Just one guy, yeah. So yeah, so we back up and Andy, the hedgehog, were informed that his name's Andy, explains that he got the ability to speak due to a wish

that all animals can speak all the time, just humans can't hear it, but he got it because of magic. Wait, wait, wait, not too fast. Let's back up again. So back up to meet the family. There's a lot of free frames for you, sorry. This is the Sargosa manuscript of a low budget

talking animal family films. The movie just keeps edging you about when you're going to get to the story, you know. Yeah, it's like the most recent Mortal Kombat movie. So we, so we're introduced to the family. We have a little girl named Lily, who is the caretaker for Andy the Hedgehog. We have, I think you guys might have to help me. Tina is her older sister who's a cheerleader and is very sarcastic to lead get out of that cheerleader uniform.

The movie takes place over several days and each time she's wearing the same cheerleader uniform, her and her friends spend all their time everywhere in their cheerleader uniforms. And I don't think high schools provide multiples, right? They expect they give you one than they expect you to clean it. Yeah. Yeah, I think that's about right. Yeah. And maybe perhaps this is taking place in some far future where clothing has entered a self-cleaning state.

Maybe just for special uniforms. Maybe it's just like in Spider-Man 2099, the reason he uses, in the Marvel comics, the reason he uses that costume is because he bought a costume made of unstable molecules because he was gonna go celebrate the day of the dead done in Mexico and he didn't to rip his clothes or get him dirty And he bought this one more expensive outfit and that's why spider-man 29 has a big skull on the front of him

Maybe it's like that maybe this take place in the year 2009 which is just like now in all respects Except surely the uniforms can be worn multiple days Well also like it is a very strange movie in terms of time. Like I had a hard time following like what time frame is this supposed to be happening in? They're dealing with all this stuff with Andy the Hedgehog and then her sister's friends come over and then they're like, well, we gotta go to school

and I was like, wait, was this all happening before 8 a.m.? Yeah, there's time for one friend to come over and then call another friend and they come over. And then like Dean Kane goes to work and I guess maybe he forgot something, but I don't think it's clear, because he then like comes back like 20 minutes later from work.

I feel like when I went to school, when I was going to high school, it was either like kind of dark or like dawn when I was going to school. Yeah, I mean, it depends on the time of the year, obviously. But yeah, I think that that's, like it is ridiculous in how often in movies, people like just hang out before their day starts. I mean, just the fact that's, like, it is ridiculous in howl often in movies, people like just hang out before their

their day starts. I mean, just the fact that when I was a kid, it was always a rush. And today, as an adult, it's always a rush to get children out of the house and ready for school. We never had leisure time to hang out with our friends before school. But anyway, but that's, look, and also Andy the Hedgehog takes place in a sort of liminal time zone. Well, much like in stalker or the third policeman.

Yeah, absolutely. I mean, speaking of confusions of time and space, also, as those were introducing characters, the mom, I believe Melissa years outside of the kitchen, only twice in the film for very brief moments. Like, there's one point where she opens a door. She's trapped. And there's one point where she says good night to one of the kids. But otherwise, she's always at the kitchen either fixing a meal or drinking coffee. And spoiler at the end, she appears in a cheerleader outfit that she has no memory of putting on. So this really is the movie gets there these moments of just sheer like we're like,

is this all taking place in Andy's head? Like what's what's going on? And while we're talking about characters in their strange positioning in space, we have whiskers, the hairless cat, who is like a grouchy evil figure. And whiskers is almost always perched on top of cabinets in every room, like no matter what, or is in one room and just can project it's like image in our room. Also twice referred to in the film as that fuzzy thing. When again, a hairless cat.

A hairless, yeah. We'll have to get into Whiskers being obsessed with death later. That's for the defining. Is it finding trade in this film? Yeah. I always feel bad for hairless cats like that because you can't help. It goes back to ancient Egypt. Yeah, you can't you can't help but assume that they're a demon from looking at them, but they're just a cat like they have the brain of a regular cat,

but they look like a demon. So I can't help but assume their monsters when probably all they want to do is normal cat things like kill me and eat me. So we're also introduced to the the pattern, familius, the father of the family. That's what I just said played by, uh, Bob played by Dean Kane, who in real life is a piece of shit. Um, and he was, uh, now I, now I know he is, but I can't remember why he is. Do you remember why?

Why do I not like him? I think he's just like another, like, uh, washed up doctor, became a right winger. I think it's, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, that makes sense. He's still, his hair still looks pretty Superman-y though. Oh, yeah.

Well, okay. I guess he gets, he gets a dubby on that one. So, can I like him from the far head up? Yeah, I mean, we can, I mean, you could take his picture to the bar, but I guess we'll have to separate art from artists in this case. I like to separate the hair from the hair. Uh-huh. The, so who else do we have? We have. Yeah, I like to take me, I sneak hair. So who else do we have?

We have. Yeah, I like to take the, I sneak into their house at night and I separate their hair from them. They call me, they call me the hair fairy, which is, and they haven't caught me yet. So watch out, Clarice. I guess you need to go hang out with a cannibal to find out how to trap me. Wow, you're so over it. And then we're introduced to one of Tina's cheerleader friends, Trixie, who is kind of Ditsy and Dom and says made up words and is always taking pictures.

Everyone continually talks to her about how dumb she is and just, you know, expects her to take, I mean, she does take it, but I'm like, I just want to be like, Trixi, these people aren't your friends. Yeah. Keep talking to you. So, it is. It is Trixi, the one who came on to Dean Kane. That's, that's the, that's the head.

That's the head she really cared. Okay. But that was that weird. There's a weird moment. Yeah, that was in Dean Kane's contract was like at some point a teen girl has to be totally turned on by me. That's what it felt like because it's never remarked on again. It definitely felt like Dean Kane's like listen, if we're going to have teen girls in this movie, everyone has to identify that I'm still a dill. You know, it's in my contract. So we cut to, oh yeah, we're introduced to whiskers, the hairless cat that Andy describes as Bob's cat from the old days. And that has never remarked on, do not know, like it's

said in a way where I'm like, was he an assassin? What is going on? I mean, to go back to the possibility that this movie takes place like in 2099, maybe they're like in some sort of biodome, right? So it's going to make old days or like pre-climic attachers. Bob had whiskers before everything went the hell and they got put into this replica for the suburb. I like that.

Certainly supported by later on when inexplicably it becomes extremely foggy outside. Like from like one shot to another. When Whiskers is telling his story about his lost love later on, Swillard, we see him sitting on a balcony in a city and it is the only time the existence of urban locations or anything other than the school and the house is ever hinted at. So yeah, I totally, this is a totally valid reading of the movie that there was, he and Bob used to live in a, in a city and there was some kind of ecological catastrophe and now he lives in this, in this hologram dome.

Yeah, whiskers has this whole like flashback like he's about like he's going on his fucking strike pilgrimage or something like what's going on here? A flashback by the way. We miss the scene where he keeps on, you know, dying, getting like we created into a new hairless cat. Yeah. Oh, okay. So, let's see. So the lily is outside. She remarks like a childhood that she wishes all the things that she sees could talk. Plants, animals, et cetera. Immediately is whisked away into a fair universe that looks like a filter, an Instagram, like stories filter or a Snapchat filter that they...

I'd like to, if you went to, if you went to where Shrek lives and you took a picture with an Instagram filter, I feel like that's kind of what I think. Yeah, she's got a bunch of animated butterflies around. And we're introduced to Lily's fairy BFF, played by Tara Reid, who is dressed, I guess like a hippie, like she's got some flowers in her hair. But she's going to San Francisco. Yeah, yes. And she explains that she's got some flowers in her hair. She's going to San Francisco. Yeah.

Yes. And she, uh, she explains that she's a rookie. She is there to grant wishes. So of course, Lily wishes that all these things could talk. And of course, fair read grants that wish. Uh, and I want to say like the wish that the kid makes seems pretty off hand. Just like, you know, the way you might just walk out doors and be like, oh man, I wish the weather were better today.

You know, like, and she's like, oh, I wish I could know what everyone's saying. And then Terry shows up and she sticks with the wish. I feel like, I don't know. If you're suddenly like, oh, we're doing wishes now, like that are actually going to come true. Can I switch it up? Am I nailed down? She didn't even invest a birthday candle in this wish.

So like, yeah, Terry, maybe, but Terry's a rookie. You know, that's how it is. Yeah, maybe, maybe she has like a quality, you know, she's like a cop on a, you know, street or people's speed. Just to give as many wishes as she can for the end of the month. And, you know, little girl whispers and terror reads, like, hey, listen, I got this guy taking care of. It's easy.

Just let him talk. Let all these things tell. I was, I was wondered not to get too controversial, but I was wondered why cops have to meet those quotas. It seems impossible for a cop to lose their job under any circumstances. So I never understood they're like, we got our parking ticket quotas and it's like,

what, and what's gonna happen happen if you if you write a less ticket one less I don't understand. So listeners if you know the answer right to Elliot Kayle. Right to me care of police and because I'll be in custody probably because they'll have caught me when I tried to steal the hair off of somebody and then there's leave. So so Lily walks away and then Tara Reed is immediately accosted by her boss who is, I don't know, God, who is this figure? Like, yeah, the, I mean, he's like the head fairy, I guess. And he explains that, of course, the wish he granded was far too far out.

He's just an older man wearing regular clothes. Like, he's not even in a costume. Yeah. That he said that, you know, know, the wish was far too powerful. She never should have granted. He turns her into a toad briefly and then back into a human shape. It, yeah, it's kind of weird, but then they don't actually talk about a way forward. I guess we'll get to that later.

Lily's walking around with Andy, the hedgehog who was talking to her. She's very excited. She remarks, I still can't believe you can talk, which was like, that was like two seconds ago, dude, still. I mean, I'm gonna say a whole entire life. I think, I think that so, did you mention there's a no talking animals rule? Yeah, it's like a code violation. He quotes a very specific, but again, does nothing. And then he goes to, he goes to this other, this other magical character and goes, I know they wanted to know if these walls could talk. Please don't make the walls talk.

It really freaks people out. They don't want talking walls that can watch them do things. Don't do it. Yeah. So now we're going to get a little bit of, we get a little bit of conflict because we're introduced to a pair of very terrifying crooks. We have an older, I think Italian gentleman and his sidekick Bubba, or as it is pronounced there out the movie, Bubba.

Now, they're all, they're, I think he's a senior opinion. They're criminals of opportunity. They're not, they're not necessarily crooks. They're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're, they're general on any minute. They're not seeing an opportunity to, opportunity to to steal the talking hedgehog. I assume that they were just posing as gardeners the whole time No, because they know because everyone in the family knows them already I'll tell you something to like they all those have a very nice Ladder that Audrey was so take like she was more like this is an indication of how boring the movie gets at times that she looked up the price of the ladder that these handymen have it's a

I'm talking a $450 ladder here so I don't want to I don't want to reinforce Audrey's ladder failure but I also notice that it was a very nice ladder I was like you know he's her that my ladder they spent like 10 minutes fucking around with it on the patio I mean, in terms of screen time, the latter pays for itself, for sure, because they're like pricey ladder guys, we gotta justify it, you know, amortize it over 10 minutes of you goofing around trying to set it up. Maybe the producers like, I'll let you use my house, but I get to keep that ladder. I mean, it's probably just his ladder, but he's got a nice house, but Mr. Roller, the leader of the two, and I didn't realize this,

but I wonder if maybe they just call him that because he painted their house one time, and they don't actually know his real name, and in which Casey becomes a more sympathetic character to me. Oh, okay, yeah, it's not like he's using different names on different apps to keep his anonymity. I mean, can you do that? Probably. Yeah. If you like it, like if he set up a task rabbit with a different name. Yeah. So, yeah, the one just teaching hell out of catfish people, Dan.

Yeah. But one of them's like, one of them's Italian and the others, like, tan back me up, he said he's Italian. A bumble. I don't think he's Italian. I think he's supposed to be Italian. I just assume he was like generic ethnic European. Yeah. And the other one's like a portly bald man.

So it's that classic Chico and Curly, but not funny. He literally does like curly bits at one moment, right? He's a classic portmanteau. That's a portly bald man who has toes. So I mean, we have to assume he has toes. We never seem with his shoes off, but his balance seems other than time when he's falling down and knocking over his cohort, his balance is fine.

So these guys don't just want to be gardeners. Mr. Roller has a plan. He ripped out a page of the local newspaper that had an advertisement for a contest to win $10,000 by finding the weirdest thing and putting it on the internet. And then they do a sequence where Bubba does some farts and burps to music to harmonica. And I figured that would be enough, but it's not, I guess. Yeah. He keeps throughout the movie. He keeps talking about his riches and he's going to be rich. And it's like, it's just $10,000. That's a lot of, that's a good check of money. But you

can't retire on $10,000. Maybe it's just my LA lifestyle where $10,000 is, you buy a coffee for that. Maybe. Okay. And you know, knowing Bubba, he's just gonna, he's a goof. He's just gonna take it to New York, go to Serendipity 3, get that $10,000 Sunday that comes with a diamond bracelet, and the money's gonna be gone. So Andy tells us that he won't, he doesn't want to, and I think I guess he tells Lily,

that he doesn't want to talk around other humans because and whiskers backs him up, that talking around other humans will only cause trouble. So he almost immediately breaks that rule and starts talking in front of the cheerleaders. There's the cheerleaders, what is it, Trixi and Tina, have very strange reactions when they first see this talking hedgehog.

One is like shocked and one is kind of mad about it. Tina have very strange reactions when they first see this talking hedgehog. One is like shocked and one is kind of mad about it. And then meanwhile, as we mentioned, there were some patio shenanigans and a ladder. Mr. Roller climbs up there, I'm assuming to be a peeping Tom. Instead he sees Andy talking, you know, he sees a hedgehog talking to some girls. He falls off the ladder, then Bubba rolls around on top of him, and then they snuggle when Melissa comes out and asks them what they're doing. They're hatching a scheme to kidnap Andy, put them on the internet and get that 10,000

smackers. Now we should mention also, describe what it's like when Andy talks. Does his mouth move? Is there any indication that the sound is actually coming from this hedgehog? But they, they, they hang out, they bring that up out, they talk about that up front, right?

They say that, you know, we do, like a lot of people move their mouths a lot and say nothing, you know? Oh, okay. So I guess that makes it okay. No, it is very strange. Is it talking hedgehog who alsohog also says boilerplate nonsense philosophy. So yeah.

Yeah, it is just talking over a footage of a hedgehog or a cat with, again, very similar voices. Yeah, and then there's flowers and like a bird. And that's also the same voice, but a woman. There's a second hedgehog later that we only see in one scene. Yeah, but it is like, it's basically, you know, like America's funniest home video, it's where someone's just narrating over some video. So we get a little bit of high jinks that the girls are, you know, becoming accustomed

to Andy. The Tina is rightly concerned about rubbing the belly of a talking animal. I think that would be weird. They suggest maybe he's possessed by an alien. That's a weird joke, but whatever. They have to call their friend Tori, who's the head cheerleader, who, as we mentioned,

has a very strange, very sexually charged scene with Dean Kane. Yeah. I expected that to be at least addressed later when Dean Kane later spoiler, for something we're gonna describe in 10 minutes. Dean Kane, here's the hedgehog talk, has a mental breakdown where he only wants to watch cartoons

and eat potato chips. Um, and I sort of thought that like there'd be some payoff where like this teen girl is like freaked out by the devolution of Dean Kane even further. Well, all truly is like, is like, yeah. Yeah, I've seen American beauty. Yeah. This is my time to swoop in when they stop taking care of themselves. Right before they start taking care of themselves.

So Tori shows up and she's definitely like this outfit. But he starts working out, Dan. Oh, okay, okay. Remember? So Tori swoops in, she's the like Alfa Mean girl. She barges into the room and she says, what's this crap about talking pets? Then as soon as Andy starts talking, she faints, which is, I thought that was a pretty good joke.

Whiskers, meanwhile, makes a deal with the crooks to kidnap Andy, which is weird, because I would think that they, like, wouldn't whiskers be even weirder? I mean, he's a hairless talking cat. So Whiskers says, if you take me, I will just refuse to talk, but it's like, and he can do that too, man.

Like, I don't know how to get this. Whiskers, Whiskers, he doesn't give a fuck. He's a nigh-ass. He has no real aim here. He just wants to cause havoc. Yeah. He's seen a lot of pain as we later learned through his extensive flashback that looks kind of like karaoke footage in a cat universe. Yeah. Well, this is a karaoke for cats or caddy.

Yeah. I mean, Dan, what would be your caddy, okay song if you were cat singing karaoke? Probably now. Oh, okay. Yeah. Cats in the cradle was the obvious one. Or cat. Yeah, I think so. Yeah, I assume that we were just doing karaoke to cats. But these these flashback mind by the way, would be cat thing you do, which is all about things that cats do. Yeah, I don't know. I'm thinking for that, but I appreciate it. Thank you for being a friend. No, I was just going to say these flashback cats are not only younger cats, but clearly

like totally different markings, some of them kittens. And likewise, oftentimes if there's like a lot of footage of Andy just doing stuff around out in nature. Yeah, a lot of people. Several different hedgehogs that look nothing alike, but they have used. Yeah, this one around here in the movies when they let, they let Andy just wander around outside and it's clearly just the director narrating what the hedgehog is doing, whether it's eating sausage, scratching his face,

hanging out with this other hedgehog friend, Mike, and drinking milk, and saying milk over and over and over. Yeah, he really says milk a lot. Now, here's my question about this footage. Is this footage they shot, or is this footage they bought of some footage company of hedgehogs? On their hedgehog footage, because it's not the same hedgehog. And why else would they have a scene where he's eating sausage? Yeah. company of hedgehog. On the hedgehog footage, because it's not the same hedgehog.

And why else would they have a scene where he's eating sausage? Yeah. Like he's eating a piece of a hot dog or just drinking milk again. I would be destroying the pad out and they just were like, we don't have any more Andy footage, we got to get some more hedgehog footage. Our Japanese investors demanded a 70 minute runtime. We had it at 68, we got it, we got to do whatever we can. We sold a 70 minute movie to the South American market. We gotta get it to 70 minutes.

There's a bit where a dog shows up and Andy is rightly terrified. And the dog just barks and acts like a dog and doesn't talk unlike every plant and animal in the movie. I would also find out that Andy pronounces milk the way I pronounced it before you guys made fun of me. What milk? Yeah, he says a lot of milk.

Mouth, yeah. Well, he's from what, Michigan? Andy? Yeah, is that a Michigan thing? So the cheerleaders try and hatch a plant to exploit Andy to get famous and get Andy laid. I don't remember, oh yeah, actually, they do talk about that. They're like, they're like,

they're like, he could even have a girlfriend. That's like a mate. And it gets very, Andy is not interested in it, but they really seem to be interested in watching these hedgehogs get it. So I think this is, this is still day one of this, this, honestly. We have, and meanwhile, we have the two, again, my notes just has a most of this, this, Odyssey. We have, and meanwhile we have the two, again, I just, my notes just has them listed as

crooks. Maybe I'm doing them at a service. They are in the house. They are stalking Andy. They come up with a plan to do a termite inspection because they say the house has termites and they're carrying whiskers around. And I got a little bit of an attempt to do like a team rocket vibe here, but it just wasn't working for me.

And again, this is happening all before school starts. Yeah. In my notes, I kept, I was so amazed how long it took to get to them actually picking up Andy and trying to take him. So I kept writing, they kidnapped Andy and then having to cross it out

because the scene would abruptly end and go to something else. And it was like. Just like I thought I assume the movie was going to be they they kidnapped Andy. Lily's got to get Andy back yeah and goes after them. But they just they just wander around that house forever passing up opportunity after opportunity to pick up that hedgehog and walk away with it. Yeah, it's it's it's bottled my mind. How little they have little effort they were putting into this. They had $10,000. Come on. Yeah, they had to tell the cheerleaders twice that

like there's termites in the house to get them out of the room. This termites necessitate a freak out like or it's like it's like roaches. You're the homeowner, maybe. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's the cheerleaders also are they have wooden legs. That's the thing. Yeah, the top business to be. So those high kicks sometimes you just you kick and your leg just flies right off because of all the force. So as the kids go to school, Dean Kane returns home in as Dan mentioned before, a very foggy morning. I'm assuming he turned back because he realized there are things in the fog. Yeah, well, he was going off to his work beyond the borderlands because they live in the house on the borderlands.

I guess the pigmen forced him to turn back. Yeah, that's the fog wall of Ravenloft. Yeah. So Dean Kane returns. He has forgotten something. He ends up talking to whiskers. He realizes that whiskers can talk, but he thinks that he is having a mental breakdown that whiskers is not actually

talking and that he's been working too hard. That was evidenced by him walking in while talking on his cell phone, doing some business bitch stuff. In the movies, short hand for works too much. Yeah. Wear a suit, have a cell phone is called a sports agent. That's it. It means you work too much You need to be with your family. I I hate having phone calls guys Yeah, I never I would want to get on my business done over text So the okay, so the crooks have to hide under the bed while Dean Kane hangs out with Andy There's some more bits. Dean Cain somehow hears Tara

Reed and her boss talking. As they're coming up with a plan on how to figure out how to do away with this. They realize that and tries to get her to reverse the wish and girls like, I don't get it. Now, when you say he takes him to bed, it, he just, they just take a nap. It's not, it's not like you can talk. You can give me consent. Let's do this Andy. I Mean I there's a lot of implied sexuality between and Andy and Dean Kane's Bob character I mean if if the mom can't escape the kitchen

Dean Kane might just be lonely in that bedroom. Yeah, that's very true. Melissa's going through a lot She's got her own yeah her like her phylactory is inside the kitchen. She can't go too far from it. Okay. And she also is not, it's, we don't know where she is during this time when Dean Cain comes back and is, and they see them crazy.

She is just, maybe she's sleeping in the refrigerator or something like that in her kitchen apartment. I don't know. Yeah, yeah. One might argue, one might make the claim that she's driving the kids to school. I think that's a spurious claim

because as we've addressed, she can't travel too far from the kitchen. Madjari, but would tell us, you can't assume things that are outside the picture plan. You got to go with what the movie shows you. Is that? And he was talking about Andy the talking hedgehog when he said that, right? Yes.

It was a class where he was teaching being there and Andy the talking hedgehog. And he was making it clear you have to go with what the movie tells you. Yeah. Okay, guys, time for us to get to the real exciting part of the movie. And that's, at the school, we're introduced to Mr. Kuggen and Mrs. Havanett. Mr. Kuggen is, I think, they're both teachers. And Mr. Kuggen is down bad for her. He is, he cannot control himself and the kids can't stop talking about how much

of a fucking heart on Mr. Kuggen has for his coworker. But he just can't pull the trigger on that thing. He just can't pull the trigger for that. I mean, like, look, I don't know, maybe, maybe it's my own lack of empathy as a child. I don't think that teens in general, uh, pay enough attention to the lives of their teachers to have any opinion on one of these two should get together. Uh, I mean, two pieces of evidence won the movie Clueless, so there you go. Uh, which is his stolen. Uh, to, when I was in high school, I certainly knew which teachers were having affairs because we would all be talking about it.

But this is the opposite of that. These teachers are clearly not having an affair. Uh, meanwhile, back home, Dean Cain is eating potato chips with the smallest possible bites. Yeah. Well, you know, I mean, even for a part, Dean Cain knows a minute on the lips. A lifetime on Dean Cain. Or you got it worth more like the movie's budget is so small that they can only give him four potato chips for all the takes and they're like, make them last, Dean, make them last.

These are Costco, man, and we can't. We only got one bag. Later on, he bumps into the crooks who are trying to steal his hedgehog and he's carrying a plate covered in potato chips. Which is the first way to carry potato chips. Yeah, let me say, I have never seen a human being put potato chips on a plate by themselves. Right, you have a sandwich?

Or something you got to chip on the side. But just like, what maniac, just like pile chips on a plate, just even up the goddamn bag, or get a bowl. Get a bowl like your two regular dudes hanging out in a TV show eating snacks. He's that note. He's the further sign of his mental deterioration. Is he doesn't even remember how to eat potato chips properly?

I mean, they should have gone another step ahead and just pour them in a glass and have him try to drink the potato chips out and not be able to do it. You know, starts trying to eat them rectally. He doesn't remember how potato chips work. Sticking them in his ears and his nose throwing them out the window. Is that my mouth? I don't understand anymore. Am I the house? Anyway, this is for the sequel and the Talking Hedgehog returns. Where Dean Kane has forgotten the events of the first movie and thinks he's crazy again. Yeah. So Dean Kane is also watching cartoons on his phone. He describes the cartoons as... That's the other, another cost-cutting measure is like,

look, if you watch us on the TV, we might have to see the screen. Having watched him on his phone. Watch him on his phone just to piss off Christopher Nolan. Yeah. Well, he's watching the animated version of Dunkirk. Not that phone, yeah. Yeah, which he describes as duck pig two guys who go boom to each other. That's Dunkirk.

Yeah. He says he's handing, he's caught up with what's, what happened with the duck and the pig or whatever. I'm like, I don't think, I mean, assuming that you're talking about Porgy and Dappy, that happened a lot of new developments recently. I mean, we saw one of the most recent ones a couple episodes back, but otherwise they've just sort of been hibernating. Is that what you think they're doing, Dan, when they're not in cartoons, is there hibernating somewhere? There's like a cave on the

Warner Brothers lot that for he being done, then deffy duck or just sleeping in right now. Yeah, they're in stasis in the center of the earth. Everyone knows this. Meanwhile, Melissa, his wife is worried that Dean Cain's behavior, which now includes acting like a dog for some reason, is due to him skipping breakfast, her want, as we have seen her interaction with other characters, is very breakfast focused. Yeah. Which, I am all about. Now the bad guys are still hiding in the house. I think even the garage this whole

time. Yeah. Okay, now it's bedtime. Is that when she walks in on them like collapsed on top of each other? Yeah, they're always on top of each other. And they're like the garage door works. And it's at that point, I would be like, I don't care if you're in a relationship. That's great. But please, not in my garage without telling me. And ever, what are you doing here exactly? What work are you accomplishing? What were they there for in the first place? Because all we've seen them do is wander around

and set up a ladder. Like what work is going undone on the roof that they were supposed to be doing? Are they fixed in the roof, cleaning the gutters? Who are these guys that they get with? When you bring a contractor in, you expect them to do just one thing, but then they find a bunch of other things

that need to be fixed. True, true. And the dogs that need to be kidnapped, yeah. Stewart, when you say it's bedtime, I just want to know that Andy and voiceover says, now our story goes to later that night. Who it is? Thank God he told me,

because the establishing shot of a dark house, then I would have been so confused. I would have been like, did the sun get extinguished? It's like in Wally and the computer that controls the sky of the climate bubble they're in. It's abruptly switched to night so that they all have to go beddy by now. So the cheerleaders, I guess, are having a sleepover in the same house. They briefly talk about a car accident story that I would like to hear more about.

And then they spend time with the car. Which seems to be based on a true story. Because during the credits, they talk about the actress having hit another character's car with her car. So I wonder if that is them talking about a real thing. You watch all the credits, you fucking maniac., well the parts the parts were and it was narrating honestly the best part I don't if you miss them like it is Andy and the cat I've whiskers like talking back and forth about all of the actors and people in the movie and like about them as actual

And like about them as actual there's one actress. There's one actress and Andy just goes, she talked about Jesus a lot. And he was the sister character. You miss the best part, Stuart. The best part where the director was like, as these characters, I'm gonna bad bouth my cast during the credits.

Yeah, and apparently the one who played the dumb cheerleader rear-ended part car and the director like made fun of her in the credit for it. There's so many movies. It's just like in Midnight Cowboy when he said, I'm walking here. There's so many movies where the best part, the most iconic part, was just an accident caught on film. And I guess in this one, he saw that she re-rendered this first car and he was like,

that's in the movie now. There's no way that's not in the movie. And he had to buy her story, I assume, which contributed to the budget, which is why Tinkane can only take the tiniest little nibs on those potato chips, you know. So after sprinkling some crumbs about this car accident, we, the teens talk about their teacher romance

subplot that they're very invested in. And then whiskers is like romance, I'll tell you about romance. And then we get a flashback where we get to see whiskers traveling throughout time. He devolves into this like, into like Andy circus at one point, and that was crazy.

And then Andy interrupts and then Andy circus for Andy the hedgehog. Andy the hedgehog. Although, how crazy would it have been to turn out that Andy circus was doing the moshot. Andy the headshot. Although, yeah, how crazy would it have been if it turned out that Andy Sirkis was doing the mocap for Andy the headshot this morning? It would have made a lot of sense, especially in that sausage eating scene. The Andy Interested. Is that something that way does that have trademarked Andy Sirkis thing?

Yeah, Andy Sirkis is really well-known. Yeah, and to every single Andy Sirkis movie, if you look carefully, he's eating a little Vienna sausage. Wow, I've got a watch. I did not notice that. Yeah, the next time you go to Walmart or a Fred Meyer and you pick up the Andy Circus collection box from the DVD, Barton.

Now what's in there? King Kong definitely. King Kong, yeah, for sure. 24 hour party people. Yeah, you got to imagine that, and also if you're looking for it, make sure to look for the DVD box set that comes in a circus tent Because it's called Andy it's they spell it Andy circus CIRC us and it's it's as Andy's circus Andy's why circus

Yeah And it's and it's comes in a tent and it's great and all the discs are in there It's pretty actually not very great packaging for a DVDs to be just loose in a tent because they tend to move around and scratch during transport, but you know. So different Andy that's Andy the head jog, not Andy circus. Yeah. As honestly, so I should mention in the Andy circus that they did it says black Panther, but it's just his scenes from black Panther. It's a dear choice.

Yeah. Yeah. It's called a call. And age of all drawn. He's in age of all drawn to barely, yeah, they they include it as its own disc Which again, they're just trying to just try and inflate the discount at that point. Yeah, so Andy the hedgehog interrupts and he heads to the bathroom, which of course is a one-way ticket to fairy land where he It is funny how at a certain at a certain point they just make it clear that every bathroom door is now an entry to fairy land where he has it. It is funny how at a certain point,

they just make it clear that every bathroom door is now an entry to fairy land, even if you need to use the bathroom. But so he goes in there. Terry, Terry, Terry convinces him to help her convince Lily to end this nonsense. And I'm like, yes, please, the movie should be done. Okay, next day, Dean Kane wakes up. He's like, what a crazy dream I had. Uh-oh,

not a dream. The animals are still talking. The plants are still talking, so he devolves again into a chip eating cartoon fiend. Meanwhile, Melissa is just sipping her coffee, just trying to hold it all together. Yeah. I think that the background story of this is, well, Dean Cain is sort of dissolving in the most big way possible. She is just barely holding it together. I mean, it's really a portrait of somebody locked in a marriage with a man who is losing his mind and is no longer reliable. She's just, yeah, she's just trying to keep things going. In a marriage often, one person kind of gets licensed to lose it a little bit, and the other one has to step up and then you switch roles. So you have to assume in the sequel,

Fredo the talking camel, that she's going to be the one who goes nuts and Dean Kane is going to be the one who's like, hey, we got if we got a kid to take to school, let's do this, you know. I just want to say that for listeners, it was a delight to see Jim Jim else face when react to Elliott say Fred O. Let's see. Lily goes to the bathroom. She really has to go, uh-oh, back to Fairyland. So she has another, there's another attempt to have Lily change her wish. No dice yet.

I really don't understand why she's so resistant to changing her wish, considering that it is, uh, obvious that her dad is having a breakdown as the basis of, I mean, I don't, I don't, uh, have any small children. So I don't know if they're stubborn or difficult to deal with guys. Nope. Always, uh, I don't know about your, your experience, uh, Jamel, but my children are always like, yeah, whatever you say to dad, that's what I wanna do. Let's do it. Wash my hands for dinner.

Yes, definitely. Kids love to be obedient. They love to do what their parents say. That's just how it goes. Yeah, it's bedtime. I'm way ahead of you. I'm already in the bed. Gotcha.

Here I am. Brush my teeth five times today. Okay, let's do it. Brush my teeth. I love it. Hey, can I am. Brush my teeth five times today. Oh, okay, let's see. Brush my teeth, I love it. Hey, can I do my homework now? Yeah, that kind of, they love to do it. At this point, both of my sons are, anytime anything is mentioned, they go, no,

even if it's something they like and wanna do, we're like, let's go get the ice cream and they're like, eh, let's stay home. But if we were like, let's stay home, they'd say, let's go get ice cream. They're just a couple of real, country, just, kind of a couple of bizarros, I guess.

Just couple of countries. A couple of little Christopher Hitchens, you have. Yeah. Oh, I hope not. Oh, no, that would be terrible. So, Lily takes Andy to school, Andy Charms, everybody at school, even the bullies a little bit.

But this is weird because later on, there's a, the plot is to bring Andy the talking hedgehog to the science show as some kind of science thing. And if she's already brought the hedgehog, like what's people be over it? But as well, because everyone was like, what, talking hedgehog, I mean, I guess that- To be fair,

actually, the real relationship. The real relationship. The real relationship. The real relationship. The real relationship. The real relationship. The real relationship. The real relationship.

The real relationship. The real relationship. The real relationship. The real relationship. The real relationship. The real relationship. The real relationship. The real relationship.

The real relationship. The real relationship. The real relationship. The real relationship. The real relationship. The real relationship. The real relationship. The real relationship. something like you're like I built a thing or like I'm gonna show that this does I have an experiment. This is literally just like we found a hedgehog that talks and I'd be like D minus. You don't you didn't have anything to do. Yeah, you know. Yeah, this doesn't what's your whatever. What's your hypothesis? My hypothesis is that sometimes hedgehogs can talk bitch. Well, now you're definitely getting in half. That's unacceptable. Stop dabbing, you're getting in half. Also, Freddie goes to this high school very, very interesting.

Yeah. Well, here's my experiment, is I wanted to see if you put sugar in water if it made plants grow better, and I guess it kind of does. You're trying to learn more about teens. I'm around so often killing teens that it reminded me. I never got my high school at home. I never changed my entry. I had to go back to school.

And now the teens I'm used to killing are killing me socially. They just won't let me be part of the group. Oh man, it's so hard being me again. It was already hard being me because I'm a criminal deviant who is hardly scored in a fire. And I'm some kind of dream demon, but now I see. I mean, you should just change up his wardrobe.

I mean, it's pretty simple. That's why it's called, it's called a Diner and Elstreet Ultimate Nightmare because now it's time for Freddy's Ultimate Nightmare. High school. Yeah, oh man, he's allergic to homework. So after school, we have this very charming scene where... Yes, wait, I just wanna do Freddy doing the,

they did the end of the trailer. So you see the title and then you the end of the trailer is him doing the Plegile agency goes I pledge allegiance bitch to the flag So we have this Dan you're gonna make this movie. This is your ticket to features. Come on We have a scene in the the kitchen of, where the mother is preparing dinner and Andy asks, Melissa, like, what are you cooking? And she says, sushi, and that was the last thing I was expecting you to say. Oh, man, it was great. Okay. So the next day, the teenagers bring Andy to the science show, which seems to be this kind of free form thing, having you in the cafeteria, you get your volcano, et cetera, before they go

up, of course, Lily is like, okay, fuck it. I wish he can't talk anymore. Did we miss the part where Lily brings Andy to the school and some girls are bullying here and Andy caused one of the girls fat? I didn't. I, I missed that part. Oh man, that part shocked me. That's crazy. The girls are bullying Lily and Andy's like,

you shouldn't say mean things about her because you're fat. And I was like, what the fuck? Yeah. Like fuck off, dude. But then later she was. He saw her. He really badly. She goes, right later she pet, she goes, walks to pet Andy really badly. She goes, right later she pet,

she goes, can I pet Andy? And she does. And it was like, oh, Andy, the hedgehog knows the game. He obviously studied under mystery. Yeah. Yeah, he's nagging here. He's been watching F boy Island.

I've been watching if we want to talk about F boy Island. So, okay. Now, I have so many, I don't want to go all the way to watching it, but I have so many questions. So I have to choose which ones are the F boys and which ones are the, what? I mean, they're all looking for love, you know?

And there's 24 contestants and a few get added, spoiler. And half of them are nice guys. And half of them are F boys. And the F boys are just in it for the money. So if they get picked at the end, they're like, aha, I just got the money, Saka. And they have to eliminate people each week. And when they get eliminated, we find out

if they're nice guys or F boys. Oh man. So it's what like tattooed under their arm, whether they're F boys or nice guys. Yeah, they have a QR code tattooed on their leg, and they have to scan it. Yeah, I see. Now I tattooed on their leg and they have the skin on their file. Now I'm just mad, I refuse to watch it because it's clearly a ripoff of my pitch,

Pep Boy Island, where the ladies have to decide who's worth keeping and who's a Pep Boy. And it's relatively obvious because the Pep Boy is a huge hedge and they don't even talk about auto parts. Yeah, the Pep Boy just mechanics. Yeah, this, but sometimes that can be romantic. Which one of you is the Pep Boy just mechanics. I know you have this. Like, they, but sometimes that can be romantic. Which one of you is the Pep Boy?

I think it's me, man. I just want to tell you what. Are you like his house? No, I'm the surviving cartoc, brother, close. Oh, man. And I, but I now imagine a sad scene where one of them goes to the doctor, the doctor's like, I'd like you to sit down.

I called you down because the touch results came back. You're a pet boy. Yeah, I'm going to huge head. He's in black and white. He's dressed like it's the 50s or whatever. Uh huh. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

He's holding a carburetor in his hands. He's just a fringles guy. This reminds me. I think I sent it to you. I drew a picture of the three of us as the pet boys because we map onto the visual design of the pretty-nality traits of the pet boys. That's me, because there's the pet boy who's like kind of a nerdy chatterbox.

There's the pet boy who's always like this again, and there's the sexy pet boy, some called the pet boy, that all the ladies go crazy for, yeah. Yeah, with the pet boy, the Peppoy, the giant crank. Okay, so. The problem is we would say the Pepp house, but that's already a podcast where we talk about pepperoni. So I don't know what we're gonna do.

Where we cheer people up and get them energized with pepperoni. It's a double play on the word Pepp, yeah. So in the, she made the wish in the middle of the show. So the girls bring Andy up and they're like, we got this one in the bag, show your stuff of course Andy at this point can't talk so they look like assholes. So yeah I guess it's over.

To be honest maybe you've done right. I think just and frankly I just wait no because we heard there was going to be a kid in Africa at some point I would say yeah they should stay on their land. It's not fair to be both the cheerleaders and win the science fair. That feels like you're, you're reaching for too much. Leave some for the other. Kelly, you're boxing people in, you know, like, why can't I know I'm boxing people in Las Vegas this weekend. It's me and she was a big sponsor. The, me and, me and Manny Pacquiao are going to go 10 rings, 10 rounds guaranteed in 10 different

rings, 10 rounds in each ring. So that's right. It's both boxing and also using mapels to try to find the next ring. So yeah, it's called, it's a tie-in with Shang-ji legend of the 10 rings. It's called, it's called Kaelin Pacquiao legend of the 10 boxing rings. And all those rings, obvious, we're doing a hedgehog movie. So the, of course, now the next day, the crooks try to steal. And at this point, they're technically crooks

because they're stealing something. Okay. They've achieved crookitude. You're right, still, okay. Kidnap Andy, then they roll around and some leaves for a while. And then, and whiskers is egging them on. And they're, they run into the front yard and a little bit

negging them on because he's very insulting. Yeah. Yeah. And then I mean, the neck isn't strictly an insult, I like, but we'll get into that when we it's something negative. Yeah. I guess. I think we're learning an X course. Yeah. Whiskers is about to run into traffic. And of course, Andy warns him of an oncoming car. Whiskers is not run over, and Whiskers realizes that, you know, his life could have been snuffed out in an instant that despite all of his fixation on death, you know what? It may be it's time that he give Andy a shot. It's time for Whiskers to finally live. And I'm not going to say that, like, look, shot that like it's time for whiskers to finally live. And I'm not going to say that like look, it's a wonderful thing obviously to save whiskers

for me run over. But it's also kind of a low bar for friendship like, oh, you didn't let me run out in traffic. Like I guess we're best pals now. And now to present the cons of the debate that it would have been good to let whiskers get hit by the car is Jamel Jamel make your case. So why should Andy of let whiskers get hit by the car is Jamel. Jamel, make your case. Why should Andy of let Wiskers get hit by that car? I mean, that can't kind of suck, let's be real.

He plotted, he plotted to get Andy kidnaps. Yeah. And he also seems, as you said, obsessed with that. Yeah, I mean, we sort of, part of the flashback, right, is that his partner is made, I don't know, gets hit by a truck and he calls this what getting flattened. And this becomes like a refrain from him. Everyone eventually gets flattened. The flattening is inevitable.

And there's not really any point to this. He just sort of like says it. As a decorative statement. And it shows a real fixation with mortality from what's here's the cat. What I liked about it also is it shows a not going back and rewriting the screenplay for a second draft because it's only after he tells the story that he becomes death obsessed. And it's like, they were like, yeah, yeah, okay, he's all about, he's an Islas, he's all about death until then, he's just a jerk. And they could have easily gone back and just put it in earlier, but they didn't. They didn't bother. I'm guessing they had the book Dean Cain, there was a mix up, they thought they had a

week to write the script. He showed up the next day on their doorstep so they had an hour to write the script. And they just had to jam it out on Microsoft Word and hand it to him and then immediately start shooting. Yeah. He showed up and he started tearing the chips right away and they're like, fuck, we only have so many chips here. We put all our money into the, we put all of our money into the ladder, but chips aren't part of the script, but I'm in the movie.

What are you doing? There you are now. Oh, no, no. Uh, so that's like, there was a, I worked on a, sorry, I worked on a TV show called The Who Was Show, uh, The Shitty Daily. Yeah. And there were always scenes that were in the Who Was craft services room and there was a big pile

of huge chocolate chip cookies and every day, it would kill me that I could not have, I was like, I just wanted to reach out and take one so badly but I couldn't because they were prop cookies and I never knew where they went to at the end of the day but it wasn't to me. Sad really. I guess what I'm saying is that's what my memoirs about.

Are those prop cookies made out of like wax or something? No, they were real cookies. They were like, they were just real cookies that I assumed that were, maybe they're the same cookies every day in which case, I'm less interested in eating them because they would be stale. But there's a show. I should have just taken one.

That's the thing about a crush though, you know? Like the cookies you eat every day, you know, even though they're there for you and they might be delicious, they don't, they don't like hold that place in your brain is the cookie that you never got that you saw once and never got to have. That's the, well, it's like the, it's the fantasy about it and there's never reality to fix it to stop to, to fix that fantasy is something other than perfect.

It's just like the story in, in, in, uh, citizen cookie, the famous horse and well movie where, uh, where Bernstein, his friend says, I remember I was I was getting on the ferry New Jersey. And I saw a cookie on a on a on a table wearing a white dress wearing a white dress. I only saw the cookie for a moment. The cookie didn't see me at all. But you know, I bet a month has it gone by that I would thought about that cookie. It's a beautiful moment. Yeah. So the the crooks are running across the lawn with the hedgehog. Dean Cain sees them. He remembers that he was at one point a football player. He throws his bag of chips in the air triumphantly. He goes and tackles Mr. Roller. The hedgehog hits the ground safely. Don't worry. He doesn't get smushed or hurt or anything. Lily picks up Andy the hedgehog. Whiskers is happy.

The cheerleaders are cheering in the background. There is crowd going wild noises. Melissa is able to lead the house, but only when she's wearing a cheerleader uniform. Dean Kayne, like look at the camera for a while. Yeah. Do you think that's part of her mystical sentencing that she can only do the housema cheerleader, or is that part of their relationship? Like, it's kind of like, I choose what you wear and you're gonna wear a cheerleader outfit. Well, I mean, the movie does make, yeah, like a brief joke that perhaps this is all just a,

like a projection of Dean Kane's. I mean, it is possible that there's an ending that we missed where Dean Kane is dreaming this on his deathbed as an old man. And it's like his memories have become so fractured that he can't keep it straight anymore. I don't know. I mean, they do call him a super dad at one point

and then stare at the camera, making sure that we got the reference to Lois and Clark. Yeah. You know what? It makes me feel old that there was a time when those were the new adventures of Superman. Yeah. So that was the movie.

I think there's like when there was a new adventure in the old Christine too. Yeah, well, that made me feel really old. I was like, even old Christine's having new adventures. Yeah. And now those are the old adventures of not as old as older Christie. Were those new adventures still being a car and running over people?

I think a lot of them were. Christine being a haunted car can only do so much. Like there was the one episode, there was the one episode where she tried to become a Tik Tok star. But other than that, like again, it was just TikTok videos of her running over people too. But yeah. Very popular. There goes Christine again running over innocent bystanders. Laft track, next, cute credits, next episode. Well Christine, you're not going to run over anybody anymore.

Crush. Here we go again. Yeah. Oh man man. Okay. So that very special episode with Christine. Yeah. Yeah. Christine, you're drunk this time. Christine, you're addicted to pills. There was the nude adventures of old Christine, but again, it's a car. It doesn't wear clothes anyway. It was, it's already made. Well, it doesn't have any undercoating on. So that's just Christine rusting is what happens on the new series. So yeah, that's the movie other than the bloops that that that's Stuart and miss. Yeah, which apparently I gotta go back and watch. I want to run don't walk home. The movie ended and I was like, okay, thank God, and then

the the credits started and I was like, I guess I do have to watch these because they are just that weird voiceover and the director talking shit about everyone. It was like as if he knew everyone will have walked out of the one theater where they show this one time by this point. For what? For qualifying for an Oscar?

Yeah. I mean, I it that one time was it the con film festival. It played at Sparries movie house, according to Wikipedia, in work here on Michigan in 2018. Okay. So was this was this before after the director did a couple episodes of what was that show? Uh, yeah, I see. Sunkie reletters or something. There was, I was looking up what this director had done otherwise and he did two episodes of a show called Spunky Airlines. Now, theoretically there are 13 episodes but they're only two listed on IMDB.

And I don't know, I think this is probably not an actual TV show, but something that was, I don't know, I think this is probably not an actual TV show, but something that was, I don't know, streaming somewhere small. But it has a very wacky, there's like a cartoon plane that has spunky on it and big cartoon letters. And then like a very put upon looking man with, I guess, there are a bunch of flight attendants around him. And now what, what, Dan, pitch to me, what do you think that, what do you think that is?

What is Spunky Airlines? I don't understand. Well, I hope it has nothing to do with cheers. I think it's, I think Spunky Airlines is about, I, you know, I, I, I had assumed that it wasn't, I come related, but who knows? It is only one way to find out, I, I, I had assumed that it wasn't, uh, I come related, but who knows? Yeah, this only one way to find out, I guess. I mean, like, but Dan, okay, if it is,

pitch me the conversions, I know, pitch me the one that's, that's just related. And bitch, bitch, bitch, read the one that's not just related to make reference to another max fun show. Join Jesse go, uh, Spunk is a come word. That's the, oh, yeah, okay. But,

yeah, yeah, they would, no, I, they'll say anything on that show. I think, I mean, the, the, the G is related one would be, this is, you know, they have to, this is an airline that specializes in

sperm donor, like, you know, transport, transport for know, transport transport for the transporned for the questions. We got it. Yeah, you're regular Robert. No, I was I did not want to say that. I said it accidentally and I had to

call myself out for it. And you had to repeat it. You you you you had you were describing the poster for what spunky airlines. But I also want to say if you're interested at all check out the poster for this movie, it is fantastically photoshopped. It's great. There's a horse on it and there's no horse in this movie at all. Yes. It's it's it's it's and he's writing the horse appears to have written the horse. Yeah, yeah, there's no horse in this movie.

There's no horse in this movie. So theoretically, I can get my money back. Okay, the one I mean, you watch on Toobie, so. It's not a horse. It is Andy is on top of a stump bearing the tea. And they seem to have Photoshopped a smile on him because he looks like, hey, yeah. And we don't get love in the.

And the chair, the reader in the sky, like they're like, they've died and gone onto film. No, yeah, they've got the rainbow bridge. Let's see, Andy, the talking. Yeah, it's great. Yeah, there it is. Yeah, he's riding a horse. And it says a magical good time.

I do like that my two B algorithm is based entirely around just this and deadly lessons the tail of Simon Conjurer or whatever Yeah, now here's so you'll notice that okay I'm working so fast that Andy is like just has to hold on to the main is you know now in the UK I'm seeing this is movie is, is Andy the magical hedgehog and the image, Andy is surrounded by some kind of swirling magic. And it has a quote that said, I can't read who the code is by, but it says, the best hedgehog movie. Now, Jamel, if anyone is qualified to make that kind of judgment, do you agree is this

the best hedgehog movie? I mean, I'd say I'd have to think, you know, a lorrent of the hedgehog is probably a better hedgehog movie. Sure, yeah. Yeah. For our epic about the hedgehog that helped the, helped defeat the Ottomans in the Middle East. But it's, it's all about the wipes and the transfers.

Yeah, yeah. Why is it called a magic hedgehog in the UK? Did the British don't understand what talking animals are? Is the only context for like a talking animal has to be magical and so they just throw the magic in. I don't know. Yes, hedgehogs can probably already talk in England. So I mean, I'm gonna be called Andy the talking hedgehog. People will be like, yeah, of course, he went to Oxford. We know that. Or maybe there's already a popular franchise of talking hedgehogs over there.

Possibly. A magical time. Was it a magical good time, Dan? Is this the part of the episode where we talk about whether or not the poster lie to us? I do, I do want to mention, I do want to mention Lord's the Hedgehogs has that great, that great scene cut where he blows out the match

and then suddenly it's a hedgehog. What a magical movie moment. Yeah. Yeah. Tara read apparently tweeted about this movie making fun of the poster herself. So that's great. It's cool. Yeah. Final judgments.

This is a good bad movie, a bad bad movie, or a movie we kind of liked. I definitely did not like this movie. I'll put that up. Go on. I think if I had seen this with like a group of friends, maybe this would be a good bad movie, as it was like just Audrey and myself watching it this morning out of a sense of duty, because for some reason we have a podcast where we talk about head talk movies among other things. I didn't enjoy it even as a bad movie.

There's something weirdly grim about it. There's a sadness about this movie. I feel like- That's whiskers. I don't know. This movie- I mean, was it too much, too much whimsy? Too much, too much family-friendly whimsy-fool?

This is one of these kids movies that you can just feel like the synthesis of the person who made it, where there's like, I don't know, kids will watch whatever crap. Let's get some washed up actors and it'll be fine. Whatever, we'll make a movie. It's just like, there's an unpleasantness that I felt bled through to the screen.

But what do you guys think? I don't know. I actually, I had a fun time watching this dumb movie. I think this is a solid, good, bad movie. I feel like it would be fun to watch with a group. It's very stupid. It doesn't. Other than the, like, there's too much,

there's way too much fat-shaming. But other than that, it's like fairly innocuous, except for like you have to see Dean Kane stupid face all the time. But yeah, I mean, it's dumb. It's like a talking cat. Yeah, I'm also gonna have to put this in the good bad. It would be fun to watch with a group category.

I think one of the things that makes that way for me is there are kids in it, but the kids are not terrible. The kids are fine. And so I never felt like I was laughing at them, which would make you feel bad. But there's something about this movie where, at every, it wants to tell the simplest story. A girl makes a wish, it's a tale is all this time.

A girl makes a wish, a hedgehog talks. Bad guys want to steal the simplest story. A girl makes a wish. It's a tale is all the time. A girl makes a wish. A hedgehog talks. Bad guys want to steal the hedgehog. And yet it somehow fails every single scene to accomplish telling that story. In new ways that I did not predict what gonna happen. And so I found that very fun to watch. And they left somebody plot threads for part two.

Yeah, Andy, once again, is a talking hedgehog. Didn't see that coming. Did you for part two. Yeah, Andy once again is a talking hedgehog. Didn't see that coming. Did you part two? Do the teachers hook up? That's the question. Yeah, yeah. I mean, they do, they clearly do because we see an image of them of snuggling together. And the second movie Andy can like, you know, help them get over their hesitation about hooking up. That's just a job now. Yeah, it's called Andy the Talking Sex Therapist, Hedgehog. And it can be like a sequel to Hitch too. So it's like Andy now voiced by Wilson.

Hitchhog? He's a Hitchhog. Yeah, yeah, exactly. OK, so now you're talking my language, which is sequels to two movies at the same time. Right. So Hitch has either switched bodies with Andy or has been transformed into a hedgehog himself.

And now the two of them have to help each other. Hitch is gonna help Andy get these teachers together and Andy's gonna help Hitch live the life of a hedgehog. It's called, as we already said, Hitchhog, a slash Andy the talking hedgehog too. Yeah, that's the movie. So, Jamel, that's a, you, you, the movie kind of too. Yeah, that's the movie. So Jamel, that's a you movie kind of liked.

I have to agree that this is a good bad with the group, bad, bad by yourself watching it by myself at 10 o'clock at night. You took stock. It was not that great. Imagine watching it with some friends. And marveling, we didn't really talk about this so much, too much, but marveling at how, like, it doesn't even look like a shot on an iPhone.

It looks bad in a way that's inexplicable to me. It would have been shot about 2018. And I feel like your average consumer grade camera would be able to capture some little decent footage. There were some parts where like the shutter speed went way down and like, you know, probably action in the stunts. I think, yeah.

There were a number of scenes where I was checking my internet connection because suddenly it would be slow motion in between, like it would cut in a conversation. You would cut back and forth between shots that were in slow motion and shots that were not. And I was like, is this, am I having like early onset Alzheimer's? Well, that's the problem with my Wi-Fi. What's happening?

That's why I was pretty sure it wasn't my Wi-Fi because it would happen like within the same, I think you mean to say, my Wi-Fi. My Wi-Fi. No, within the same. I think you mean to say, my wife. My wife. No, within the same scene, yeah, like, but different shots would be shot in different ways. And I confirmed other people complaining on letter bucks, being like, why is this like weird, like,

David Lynch effect on some of these. But that's, you know, you can watch with friend, you can talk about that stuff, you can talk about the weird Cheerleader wanting the fuck Dean Kane moment. Otherwise, you know, don't watch this by yourself. Don't make you feel bad Yeah, you will you will start to wonder what what is going on in my life And it is it is even though you watch it on 2b. So it costs you nothing. It does cost you time Yeah, you will never receive again

Like if you have like if you find yourself with a free afternoon and you go by your local art house cinema and you see that they're playing Andy the talking hedgehog and you're like, you know what, I need a little bit of me time. I'm gonna treat myself, you go in, you buy yourself a packet of cookies, maybe a bottle of water, something to support the local cinema.

And you go in there and you sit down, then you watch the whole movie, like you're gonna feel like you wasted your time. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, the cinema is going to end, gonna end the end. The movie theater is going to be like, we insist you take your money back. We hadn't watched the movie yet. We just watched it with you. You got to take it back. Oh, can I get a refund for the cookies and the water? Uh, that okay. Now we're in a gray area because you still got those and those refine quality and you ate them right well yeah I didn't I didn't finish the bottle of water no one ever does well I'm not gonna ever finish a bottle of

what that's the most insane thing that you said the weird thing is the weird thing is your owner who's trying not to pay that's refund them for a bottle okay I'll say anything I feel like if if you're a movie theater screening this movie you're gonna sell a shitload of potato chips, right? The way Dean Kane was nibbling on those things. You see Dean Kane eating them and just like, oh, I wish I had those. Like the head jog was taking bigger bites of sausage than he was of those chips. I guess this movie proves that Dean Kane has a tiny mouth and that they use camera tricks to make it look like a normal human-sized mouth, yeah.

I'm Jesse Thornton, this week on Bullseye from MaximumFun.org and NPR. Hey podcast fan, we'd like to get a better idea of who you are and what you care about. So we have a quick favorite ask. If you have a few minutes to spare, please go to MaximumFun.org slash add survey. There, we've got a short anonymous survey that will take about five minutes to fill out. Plus, if you finish it, you'll get a 10% discount on merch at the maxfun store. Maxfun shows have always relied on support

from our members and always will. This survey will help keep the few ads we do run interesting and relevant to you. That's maximumfun.org slash add survey. ADSURVEY, all one word. And thanks for your help. The Flap House is sponsored in part by Squarespace. You can use Squarespace to turn your cool idea into a new website, blog or publish content, sell products and services of all kinds and much, much more. Squarespace does this by giving you beautiful customizable templates created by world-class designers. or publish content, sell products and services of all kinds, and much, much more. Squarespace does this by giving you beautiful, customizable templates created by world-class

designers, everything optimized for mobile right out of the box, a new way to buy domains and choose from over 200 extensions, free and secure hosting. So why don't you head to squarespace.com slash flop for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use the offer code flop to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Hey, Dan, I had an idea for a website and I was wondering if Squarespace would be able to help me with it. Sure, I'd love to hear about it. Now, this is a common problem. We saw it on the movie. We've all experienced it where you have to go to the bathroom, either to number

one or number two. That is a common problem. Respectively. Never number three. Never number three. Very rare. Please see your doctor if number three comes. Rears its ugly head. You walk into the bathroom and suddenly you're in a magical field where Tara Reed is asking you for a wish to make a wish. And you just need to use the bathroom and suddenly your, your, your, your John has been transformed into a portal to a magical fairy land. It's a problem we've all had to deal with and ordinary plumbers just are not up to the task of figuring out how to stop these portals.

So that's why help my bathroom is a magic fairyland portal.com is your place to find the specialists you need to fix your bathroom turning into a magical fairyland portal problems. Our experts, and we, you know, I shouldn't say our experts because we are just a site that connects you. We're a middleman. We connect you, the consumer who needs a bathroom, and you need it fast because you were about to go in your pants while this magical fairy is asking you for a wish, and you can't just say I wish my bathroom was back, they won't do that.

I've tried. We connect to you with the professionals and the specialists who know not only how bathrooms work, but also how magical fairy lands work and how to replace one with the other. Anyway, so help, my bathroom is a portal to magicalfairyland.com is your place to find this information. It's kind of a networking site. We also have tutorials about how to do some repairs on your own if you say want to install a toilet in the magical ferry land.

Again, you're just going to be using a toilet while sitting in an open magical ferry land and the ferry will continue to ask you for wishes while you're using the toilet. If you're okay with that, that's fine. That's a personal preference. I personally have trouble going to the bathroom when a magical fairy is asking me if I have any wishes at the same time, even if I'm in a stall, and the magical being is standing outside of the stall and is just yelling at me, any wishes? Do you have a wish yet? It's both hard for me to perform my waist duties

and also hard for me to come up with a wish. It's just, it's double stress and I don't need it. So I'm not the one to help you, but the tutorials there if you wanna try to do it on your own. Anyway, help my bathroom has become a magical FerrielandPortal.com or whatever I called it earlier, would be your place to find the specials that you need to solve that problem.

Do you think Squarespace would be able to help me put up a website like that? Yeah, you know what, I really do. And I look forward to listening back to this episode and hearing what you said rather than zoning out like I just know. Wow. Outer. Wow.

On this moment from Dan McCoy. Yeah. I guess we're not being polite and we started getting real. I didn't realize that, okay. That's what we're getting. That's what you're getting today. Stewart. The flat pass is also brought to you by Storyblocks.

Bring your StorySolite without sacrificing your vision with Storyblocks. Storyblocks Unlimited All Access Plan gives you unlimited downloads of the over 1 million plus assets in their library. You can try out multiple options quickly and find the perfect fit so you can create more and spend less. Stay on budget while telling the best version of your story with the most affordable subscription plans and tools on the market that scale to meet your needs.

Re-stock is their commitment to increase representation in stock media by hiring creators from marginalized communities to create content that is more reflective of the diverse world we live in. And if you want to see some examples of story blocks content, I'm sure when you check out the upcoming Flop House live show at the end of this month, where we talk about Super Mario Brothers, tickets are still available. I'm sure there will be at least one or two segments when we use, when we use story blocks footage to what give us a bathroom break.

I hadn't confirmed this with you guys yet actually, but I was planning on doing another intermission just to, you know, so we can have a bathroom break in the middle. For me, I'm so bruised, he's off camera, you know, like the, I'm sure the viewer actually won't get a bathroom break

because they don't want to miss the song. Oh, because it would be so busy loving that amazing story blocks. Although, you know what, you can take the laptop into the bathroom or the phone. Like, I'm not. I'm not going to tell you where you put up your tape over the camera. And you're all set. Yeah. Sure. Huh? Wait, why would you put tape over the camera? You know, just in case someone's hijacked that makes sense. Yeah.

And case a Russian bot is watching you, P, which is also the title of it. And it's also another website, www.help.russianbot is watching you, P. And my bathroom has been turned into a magical fairy land level.com, yeah. So explore their library and subscribe today at storyblocks.com slash flop. Once again, that is storyblocks.com slash flop. And as Stuart mentioned, we've got our live show coming up.

That's right, we'll be our live show coming up. That's right. We'll be in your house on the computer screen. That is so you don't have to worry about cleaning up or making us dinner. Or in your phone when you're on the bus or when you're at work hiding in the closet. So everybody can see you chordling away at our hijinks. Mm-hmm. Or let's say you're a constipated. Perhaps the laughs that you're watching on your phone

will help loosen everything up. Just giggle that, giggle that we need out of there. This is not, you know, the FDA hasn't approved us for that use, but off label maybe. No, what it could be us or perhaps as a marinade. If, if laughter, laughter is both the best medicine and the best affradiac. So perhaps you just want to have us playing on the side. Yeah. Well,

that's a chill. It's just if you just want to fly out of chill that September 25th at nine PM Eastern six PM Pacific. Again, we're going to be talking the movie Super Mario Brothers. That's the only, I think, live action feature film based on the

most popular video game character in the history of history video games. We're going to have all new PowerPoint presentations at the start. Dan will make something with story blocks that he has time to pee in the middle. At the end, we'll be answering questions live from listeners over Twitter. And guess what guys? What? Let's say you can't make it. Let's say you're too busy. It's September 25th at 9 p.m. Eastern 6% Pacific. Let's say you live somewhere where that's a crazy time. It's in the middle of the night or in the middle of the morning when you're at work or lunchtime.

Go on, yeah. You're just trying to get off a screen because you're on the Zoom meeting all day. If you buy a ticket, you'll get access to the archive recording of the show for one week. That's right. You can watch it at your leisure. You can watch it multiple times to memorize everything. A type of transcript, because after that week, it will be gone forever. You just won't be able to watch it at your leisure. You can watch it multiple times to memorize everything, a type of a transcript, because after that week, it will be gone forever. You just won't be able to watch it again.

So if you have any interest in watching it, it only costs $10, one Alexander Hamilton to get access to it whenever you want to watch it. As many times as you want to watch it, put it on loop for a week. I don't care, go for it. Anyway, also if we can get our act together in time, I think we can do it.

We'll have some flopp house merchandise that will only be available during the time the show is available to watch like we did last time. And we'll be talking about that during that show. So all for only $10. I mean, the merchandise to get a pay for $10 for the ticket and it's $10 per household. If you invite all your friends over, you can sure you won't know, you know, September 25th, 9 PM.m. Eastern, 6 p.m. Pacific, I was talking about Super Mario Brothers. Yep. Why not buy tickets now while you're thinking about it?

Just go to SimpleTicks, either Google SimpleTicks, Flop House Mario Brothers, or go to Flop House Podcast.com slash events with a link to where you can buy tickets. It's just that easy and it's going to be a lot of fun. You know it is because the last shows were fun. Yes, Dan. Hey, Ali, did you know that the directors of Super Mario Brothers also directed the video

for Talking Heads Blind and Tom Tom Club Genius of Love? I did not know that. Yeah. Is that how they got the Super Mario gig? Yeah, I don't know. I mean, they got it off of being, it looks like music video directors and also doing the Max Tedroom show. Yeah. And David burn was originally supposed to play Super Mario. So that's another aspect of it. Yeah. But uh, but it makes

sense that there's a real 80s early night. New style like the Kubitoo was have big David burn suits, right? They do wear big suits. It all makes sense. We'll be connecting even more dots like that. September 25th at 9 PM Eastern 6 PM Pacific time. Super Mario Brothers. Flapphousepodcast.com slash events for tickets. And thank you. Let's move on to letters from listeners. Let's get let's get this trainer rolling. This one's from... Let's get this train rolling,

he said an hour into the episode. So what's from Kevin Liesing withheld, who writes, while making my way through the flop house, back catalog, I've stumbled across the origins of some flop lore, including Ellie at first referring to the flop house as the original peaches, episode 17, untraceable, and Stuart's castle freak recommendation, episode 53, Hannah Montana, the movie. But if you had to hear anyone talk

about the show's theme music, would you enlighten us? Thanks, Kevin Lasting withheld. Yeah, I can't remember whether we've said this on air. I do get this question on Twitter sometimes, it is by Keith Bergan, who was, I believe, recommended to me by Brock, Elliott's friend and writing partner of The Old Days and... Brock Mayhan. And yeah, he, you know, I was just looking for someone to write a piece of music that was ours, that we wouldn't be stealing some copyright material in case the podcast inexplicably grew popular at some point. And...

You were very, you were very... Forward thinking about that. Yeah, forward thinking because it was not, but eight years later, I think, that we started making money off the podcast. Yeah. But yeah, he gave one version of it that was sort of more blues-en-flighted because he was kind of going off of the flop house thing,

and I said, hey, could you make it more sort of like, give it some of that Simpson's theme vibe, where it's like some sort of, like Zany Madcap feel, and he just changed the instrumentation and and it worked. It was great. It was a real Dave girl interview situation right here. Yeah, well, I mean, there's not like there's a lot to the story, but that's that's what it is. Anyway, that's the theme. But, and also thank you to our producer, Alex Smith,

for doing the eight-bit version of the Flophouse theme for that great video game episode, and doing other soundscapes for us. But. Who soundscapes? Yeah, this next one, this next letter is from Lena Last Name With Hell. Okay.

Lena Don. Right. Well, it's finally happened. And what we, the audience, can only assume was a desperate attempt to boost ratings the flop house has introduced an adorable child to the cast. Don't get me wrong, Sammy's great, his complete disregard for the conventions of linear storytelling and deadpan exploration with his dad are a real breath of fresh air to the show's formula. But I worry what move this means

for the, what this move means for the future of the show. What's next now that you've started down the well-worn path of shark jumping? Well, one of the peaches be recast between seasons by a younger, sexier actor? Well, Dan and Stewart finally get married only to get divorced so the writers can get some more mileage

out of that whole Sam and Diane thing to have going on? Well, Ellie, it'd be revealed that we have been in a Russian spy all along and revealed that seems cataclysmic but really changes nothing about him as a character or his relationship with his friends. Which of you will heroically sacrifice yourself for your friends only to be resurrected a few short episodes later and a move that allows a show to keep going but cheapens the emotional impact of the death. your friends only to be resurrected a few short episodes later. And I moved that allows a show to keep going, but cheapens the emotional impact of the death. Looking forward to you're to sit down the slippery slope. PS, I cannot emphasize enough that I'm 100% joking.

I would never seriously and unironically write into complaint about one of Elliott's kids only a monster would do that. Do you like monster? Do you like monster? Last name with hell. Wow, Elliott, put those knives away. Elliot's kids only a monster would do that. Do you think monster less than withheld? Wow, Elliot, put those knives away. I got it. Look, I got it back up my son.

As you know from the space jam episode, nothing I like less than a parent just standing by while someone else rips their kid a new one. So even this, even this kind, heavily qualified joke dig, must be met with atomic destruction. And our descent goes right into our, I guess our descent starts with small timber where we talk about Andy the talking hedgehog, huh? Yeah, we've added a adorable animal to the cast. Yeah, yeah, who would are adorable? I mean, we do have it. We have a, the house cat who's

kind of a talking animal. That's true. All he says is Raoul, but still, where is the house cat by the way? He's, he hasn't been around in a long time. Oh, man, he's, he's in rehab right now. Oh, sorry. Yeah, he's, he got real tight with the coors like beer wolf. I guess that's all the times. The signs were there and then interview that he did in playboy. Yeah.

People were wondering if what was going on with him. Yeah. Yeah, and his his and his appearance on Marin. His guys were spuds McKenzie unfortunately. Oh boy. Yeah, that's too bad. So what should we do. So what should we do to wreck the show? I think the idea of replacing someone with a new actor, and not just mentioning it, you know. Interesting, interesting, our guest thinks that there should be a new co-host. Yeah, I can be Dan, right. And it'll just be like, oh yeah, Dan's always been black.

It's an audio medium, you can't prove us wrong. It's otherwise, yeah. Okay, portrayal. That would be such a, that would be so, I mean, shows must have done that right where they just cast a new person of a different ethnicity and they're like same person. You know, obviously the same, never taught. Well, the closest thing I can think of to that is the fresh prince when they replaced the mom who was a dark skin actor or the light skin actor, and we're just like, nothing changed.

There was a difference here. Even though like right like, the actor who plays Carlton is very dark skin and so it's sort of like, well, how what happened there? I love the idea that you as a young person were writing into Freshman's being like, let's just look at their genotypes and phenotypes. This is not, who's linear just expressing right now? For some reason, Stanley wrote back and gave you a no prize. Yeah, because Jimel also offered an explanation.

That's how you get that's the secret by the no prize. You don't just find the mistake. You offer what? Explain why it's not a mistake. Yeah. And the explanation can't be because Stan was writing seven books of the time and forgot, you know, or that Kirby drew the issue in a day. So he was just, you know, working on on fumes at that point. So now do we talk about recommendations,

Danny Boye? And recommendations, movies that you should probably watch instead of after you're done, enjoying some Andy the talking hedgehog and watch the credits. Don't turn it off on the credit start because you're going to miss all that that gold. I feel like such an asshole. I would like to. I think it's the only reason I think it's funny as soon as because this was maybe the shortest movie we've seen ever. I mean, except for me, it's true that it was just like and done couldn't watch a minute more. I immediately threw my laptop across the room.

I jumped on the treadmill, popped back, popped Hellraiser back on, so I could finish my workout. Yeah. I'm like, I got to make my body as wet and glistening as the creature's unscreen. Yeah. Well, for my recommendation. The thing is, Frank, the skinless monster and hell razor. That's

my body. Oh, wow. He's almost, he's almost. Now, he's just like a skinless guy, right? Well, when I pause the movie and it listed the characters and their actors, it listed that character as Frank, the monster. So I'm going to take my cue from Amazon or I guess it's probably IMDB. It's all one company. Look, every company is just the world's I bought to entertainment. We're getting into the fall. It's not only September now, but I'm, you know, I don't need, I don't need it to be October to start watching some horror movies. Oh, Dan just made a spooky face. I want to recommend a new movie called The Night House starring Rebecca Hall. And it's about a woman whose husband has committed suicide. And under very sort of unusual circumstances, very unexpectedly,

she has a lot of sort of obviously sadness, but also anger at it happening, confusion about why it happened. And her grief is strong and she is living in the house that he built for the two of them and strange things start happening and horror things start happening. And honestly, I think that the movie is a little stronger when it is just sort of focused on the mysterious things happening at her grief because Rebecca Hall is so good in the movie. As is the Sarah Goldberg plays her

friend and you may know her from Barry where she plays Barry's girlfriend and she's a great actor and she turns a you know a pretty basic concerned friend role into something that feels very real. Yeah, she's the one who's so good on Barry that she gets endless hate mail from asshole dudes on the internet. She's just doing her job. But she's so good. But I think that the movie is not quite as strong when it starts explaining things and

gets into sort of the horror, the unraveling of the logic of what's going on, but it is still very kind of haunting horror movie that I enjoyed quite a bit. So the nighthouse. Yeah, I want to see that. Thank you, Roy. What do you want to recommend? I'm going to go to my familiar place, my comfort zone. I'm going to gonna say go over to

Shutter, fire up Shutter, and watch a new movie that went up there. I don't know when you're listening this, but at some point it's a movie called Superhost. It's a little thriller that's a little nasty, and it's got some really fun performances, including one from former Flop House guest, Barbara Crampton. And it's about a couple who make YouTube video reviews of Airbnb's and they end up staying in Airbnb that you know, well, you can figure it out. It's like it doesn't have any particular twist there that's surprising, but the performances are all really fun and I thought it was, I thought it was, it was good and

it was gory and it was cool. Super host. I'll go next. How about that? I have not, I have, life has been busy and I have not had a chance to watch too many new movies lately or any new movies other than Andy the talking hedgehog which took a valuable movie viewing time that I would have loved to have spent on something else. Anything. Yeah, you're seeing all the reviews in from what Venice and all these other film festivals. I can only, I can, I watch the video of the ovation they gave for Dune and I'm like, well,

I hope to see it someday if I can finish with the Talking Hedgehog movies. But I started this, so I was thinking, I wanna recommend a movie about a talking animal or that is good. And I was doing some research and there are not very many, it turns out. There's not a lot of non-anamated. Not France is the talking, Mule? No, not even that.

There's not a lot of non-anamated, good, talking animal movies. Hot to trot. Hot to trot, I was briefly like, do I have the guts to recommend a movie that I thought was marginally funny when I was seven and have not seen since then. At a time when I was young enough that I thought, yeah, Bobcat Goldway, I guess this is how grownups talk, you know, that's why he does that. But instead, I'm going to

a better movie, I think, about an animal that learns how to talk, or gains the ability to talk, is, it made me think of Rise of the Planet of the Apes, the first of the recent new Apes trilogy, and as someone who really loves the original plan of the Apes movies, I remember being really bold over about what a good job they did in making a, making a movie and then following it up with two sequels that were really good that did something similar to the old series, but different enough that it felt like its own thing, but similar enough that it felt like we are, we know the kind of the themes that we're playing with to a certain extent. And so that first one, I just remember being so impressed by it when I thought it was going, I was worried that it was gonna turn out to be crap

as there had been a history of bad remakes of the Planet of the Apes movies. And it was just really good. So rise the Planet of the Apes. It's another movie about an animal who learns how to talk. This time through scientific, rather through magical means. And it's a little harder to put the genie back in the bottle.

Good one. I remember watching this. I'm not a said this on the show before, but I remember firing that up and right away, I'm like, oh, that CGI baby monkey looks so fake. And then within like 10 minutes, I'm like sobbing. I'm like, CGI baby, baby, cry. And also, we're speaking of Andy Circus earlier.

Prim Andy Circus, but sorry, Jim, I didn't say anything. I would recommend those sequels to. Those sequels, I think, are recommendation is not talking M or ap related. It's a lot of people who are talking about the same thing. I mean, I think it's a lot of people who are talking about the same thing. I mean, I think it's a lot of people who are talking about the same thing. I mean, I think my recommendation is not talking am or, or ape related. It's a, I recently watched for the first time the last seduction and 194 erotic. As part of criterion channels, modern

war and neon war collection. As part of criterion channels, neon war collection, several, can which contains every movies, which are not in wars. There's very frustrating to me. There's a bunch of stuff in there that's sort of like, I mean, these are good, but like, I don't know if they belong here. You got 10 minutes in and you're like, I can't watch this garbage. No one's, no one's wearing a hat or using a gun. There's no shadows. I think I think the criterion channel falls down sometimes when they're like, here's, instead of being like, here's five great Ne and wars. They're like, here's 30 new and wars. What's some of these? You don't expect me to watch them. That's the thing, but sorry, talk about last deduction. Last election is great. It's a, it's basically sort of double in debnerity if the

femme fetal is the lead. And also she is a lunatic. And it's, she's played by Linda Fiorentino who is scams her husband out of a bunch of money or steals a bunch of money and then is basically trying to get away with it and pulls in a kind of a yoke called Peter Berg who gets really into her into it sort of it to lend a fear and Tino like exploiting all the men around her for the sake of her trying to get this money. And it is a totally great watch. Fear and Tino is terrific. She's like phenomenal in the role. Yeah. And it's a real shame that her career didn't take off the way I really think it should have after this and men and black.

She had like, I think, think I think I think within a couple of years she had this and men and black, which are two great performances from her. Well, she, I mean, she got a reputation for being difficult, which is frequently coded for like, we just don't like this woman. Because I, you know, I, yeah, I think she's a terrific actor. I look, I don't know what she's like on a set. I met her briefly socially and she couldn't have been nicer. So I, I've always been a fan. What was that that you met her on? Sarah, my ex-wife is friends with her sister

and we hung out on a bar once and she was being at that. Oh, that's really cool. Very cool. Yeah. I remember this was one of the first, that's really cool. Pretty cool. Yeah. I remember this was one of the first, I mean, this movie came out in 94. And I remember so well being like 12 and watching like E or whatever and hearing about how all these critics were saying

that it should have been nominated for Academy Awards but because it aired on television first. Yeah. It was ineligible and how that was, and it was like the same issue that now we're gonna be dealing with with what movies deserve to be nominated for Oscars if they're on streaming platforms. Like, last deduction was a real pioneer with that in appearing on HBO before it was in theaters.

Well, and John Dahl had to have into him with Red Rock West as well. Like he made these two noirs that both got sort of dumped to premium cable. Is red rock West isn't in the neo-noir criterion collection, right? I can't remember, but I think they would qualify. I mean, it isn't. It's, it would probably just because they don't have the rights to it. It's not like they were like, I think it's hard to, I think it's not. No, I think I remember reading that's hard to, hard to find. Yeah. But I mean, if you go to the video store in my hometown that's not there anymore, that's

where I got it. Okay. I'll just head down to a place I don't know of. If you want to go, if you want to go to the video town in Milburn, New Jersey in 1995, you can pick up a copy of it. Okay, but he also, like, I feel like could have had a bigger career because, you know, rounder is a sort of a cult now, and that's a fun movie. And Joy Ride, I think, is a really underrated.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Directed. Great walker steeds on Lili Sobiuski vehicle. Yeah, pun intended. You gotta imagine he's living off the proceeds of his dad's estate, Roel Dahl. So he's probably fine. Mm-hmm.

All right. Well, let's... Ha-ha-ha. On that note. It's a dismiss fine. All right. Well, let's on that note. It's a dismissive. All right. Well, let's shut up the flyhouse for another week. Jamel, is there anything that listeners should check out that you've been up to lately? You don't have to, but if so. There's been your time's column.

There's been your time's newsletter. You can check out on serious eats. I have a series for viewing bad cereals. You can check that out. That's a lot of fun. That's really bad at it. I mean, that's plenty. I don't want to do that.

I don't want you to think that you're underachieving right now. You have so much stuff and yet you still found time to watch the still movie and come on. No, it's always a pleasure to hang out with you guys. Thank you so much for being here. Something to have you. Yeah. Thank you to Alex Smith, our producer for making the show Sound Good. Thank you to Maxman Fun, our network. They lend us so much support. Please return the

favor, go there, listen to other podcasts, you know, become a member of the network. And go to simple ticks, flop house, and buy a ticket to our Super Mario Brothers show. I don't know how you're going to watch Super Mario Brothers. So that's on you, buddy. You should buy a ticket to hear us talk bullshit about it. Yeah, we can't do everything for you. But yes, September 25th, 9 PM Eastern 6 PM Pacific, Super Mario Brothers, go to flop house podcast.com slash events or the link to buy tickets. And I guess, yeah, go back to video town in Melbourne, New Jersey in 1995. I bet they've got a copy of Super Mario Brothers just sitting on the shelf in the science fiction fantasy section. I'll take a, you know, go back and turn on TBS. It might be playing who knows.

But yeah, until we talk to you again, I've been Dan McCoy. I'm Stuart Wellington. I'm Ellie Kaelin. I'm Jamel Bowie. Bye. Bye. Jamel, you know I'm gonna be asking you about Hedgehog's in America today, so get that shit ready. Yeah, I'm gonna pop baby. Yeah, come on. Maximumfund.org Comedy and Culture Artist-owned

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