The Flop House - EPISODE #376 – Morbius, LIVE!
Episode Date: August 13, 2022Covid has kept us from in-person live shows for more than two years, but last weekend we made our triumphant return at The Bell House in Brooklyn, and we hope to line up more soonish (in addition to k...eeping the odd streaming show)! What could possibly live up to that event status? Uh... how about a LIVING VAMPIRE? We discuss Morbius! Fangs to all who came out in person!Wikipedia entry for MorbiusEver tried Microdosing? Visit Microdose.com and use FLOP for 30% off + Free Shipping.
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On this episode we discuss Morbius.
Live from Brooklyn, New York! This is the point where the people who have never been to these shows before are like,
oh, they're really just sitting at that table.
I apologize to everyone sitting in this general's.
Uh, apologize for how much of Elliot they get to see.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Thank you.
You need to sit over there.
Six.
Six.
Because I'm not tall enough to really be seen over the table.
So if you want to see me, you got over there.
Elliot was doing some squalant's backstage and guys, he's got it.
Thank you.
He's got it. He's, thanks. He's got it.
He's got it.
He's got legs, yeah.
Take him to the floor.
So, shall we start the show now?
Yeah, this is a podcast where we watch a bad movie
and then we talk about it.
In this case, this is a live show.
We're back live.
Yay!
That's right.
That's right.
The first time in over two years.
And so, of course, we went to our old homestead, the bellhouse.
I mean, honestly, this is where I would want to be.
I love this place, the Stafford Great, tip the bartenders.
It's awesome.
Yeah.
And it's extremely convenient for two-thirds of us.
Not you.
Not so much for me.
Not so much.
But I tacked on a visit to my family in New Jersey, so it's all worth it.
You can write off your love as a work expense.
Oh, I've been doing that for years.
What's, uh, yeah, what? Morbius, what about this movie?
Well, everybody we're talking about Morbius today. That's right, Morbius.
It starts with an M and that rhymes with movie. No, wait a minute, hold on.
It's the, it starts, M movie starts with them and that rhymes with movie, no wait a minute, hold on. It starts, M movie starts with them and that rhymes with movie, which is not a word.
It kind of sounds like oogi loves. And the great balloon-to-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the-the- meant to be the movie of the summer. It was the movie that was released to theaters only to die,
only to rise again and be released a second time to die yet again.
Just like Jesus except dying a second time.
Let's see, did Morbius deserve this unheralded fate?
I mean, it's a Morbius movie, of course it did.
Like, before we start the movie, we're going to summarize this movie.
I'm curious to show of loudness or hands of the audience.
How many of you are familiar with the character of Michael Morbius before this movie was announced?
Okay.
So why is it going to amount?
Remember, this is a podcast audience, so those numbers should be way high.
It's not an accurate sample size of the American public.
I made a point of calling him Michael Morbius, leaving out the fact they did all that hard work to become a doctor at
AGT sorry doctor Michael Morbius you're right doctor Michael Morbius MD
Perhaps I'm just gonna Morbius doctors what that stands for I'm gonna
It's a little redundant
He gave himself the degree. I think we could all it's like Randall without the Mology license himself
Yeah, I think let's I'm gonna say something, Rand Paul without the apology, license himself. Yeah.
I think, I'm gonna say something that a lot
might be a bit of controversial thing.
I'm gonna look at spider fans.
My second, maybe second least favorite
Spider-Man character.
Wow.
Ask me who my least favorite one is.
Who's your least favorite?
Molten man, piece of shit.
What a crappy character, molten man is.
He's not even really molten.
What is, yeah, does he melt?
What does he do?
What is, does he?
He's covered him and somehow gave him super strength
and thick skin and he started out as a crazy guy,
but he's also Spider-Man's friend, Liz Allen's half brother,
I think.
So now he just wears a suit and goes to work every day.
At the chemical company.
Like the metal suit or just a normal suit.
No, no, no.
He works at the same place that he had that workplace injury.
Yes, he does.
It's a family business, so he couldn't sue.
You know, get out of here.
They're economic pressures.
He's a terrible character.
Morbius is second terrible.
And he comes from a time when the Compa code,
this is going to be boring.
Compa code.
In the 1970s, they used that.
I mean, we can't skip it.
No, it's, yeah. Always an option. No, no. People saw it was a Morbius episode, so they said gonna be boring. Compa code, in the 1970s, they used that. I mean, we can't skip it. No, it's, yeah.
Always an option.
No, no, people saw it was a more obvious
after the show they said, get boring.
Yeah, there was a rule that said no vampires.
In the 70s, they were like, you know what,
you can have vampires.
And Marvel's like, great, let's have Spider-Man fight Dracula.
And then Stanley said, no, it's gotta be a superhero vampire.
Not Dracula.
And then Dracula showed up later in the Marvel books anyway.
So, so they invented this guy.
Anyway, more of this begins in the misty jungles of Costa Rica.
So we sail a sea helicopter, go into a cave full of bats.
And it just made me feel bad because Costa Rica is also
where all the Jurassic Park shenanigans have.
When will American monster stuff stop using Costa Rica
as the stomping grounds?
You know, it's not fair to the Costa Ricans.
It's a lovely country.
They're pretty laid back there.
They don't even have an army.
And it's like, you know what, leave him alone.
Anyway, so that's my pro-co-story-carant.
Stop sending American vampires to Costa Rica.
Not everybody.
So there's this cave full of bats.
What's weird is that Michael Morbius,
I think, is already at the cave.
He's like, the helicopter shows up.
It's unclear from the editing, at least to me,
whether he was on the helicopter
or he was just there waiting for his ride.
Yeah. And he's on, I know he does come out of the helicopter. That's right, whether he was on the helicopter or he was just there waiting for his ride.
Yeah.
And he's on, oh no, he does come out of the helicopter.
That's right, he comes out on crutches and he's amazed.
He says, but the power of these vampire bats.
And he sets up a big trap that's like made out of electric strings or something.
And the helicopter pilot is like, I don't want to stay here, past sundown.
And this is the problem the movie has, is that it seems to confuse vampire bats with vampires,
which are not the same thing.
Vampire bats are just called that,
because they drink blood, but like they're bats.
They're just bats.
They don't bite you unless you sleep and you're a cow.
So you don't really have to worry about it.
Better get your daughter to only one of those things.
Yeah, that's true.
And your seat pat machine is so loud,
it would scare the bats away.
It would scare the bats away.
They would mess with their echolocation and they crash into walls.
And you know.
Now, here's where I reveal the surprising twist that I have seen
Morbius twice at this point.
Yes, OK.
As someone who...
I feel bad.
I said all those bad things about Morbius before Dan's a real
more bad.
He was so excited.
So finally, my favorite Spider-Man character, second favorite
molten man, he said, is there finally they're going to make a movie out of him?
As a season pass holder at the Alamo Draft House,
and someone who has interesting work schedules.
I think at the time you were,
you were, let's call it amorphously employed.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
My friend John was like, I'm going to Morbius. I'm like, hell, yeah, let's call it amorphously. I'm going to morbias. I'm like hell yeah, let's do it and
It's too a clock on a weekday. I'll never die
There is no there's no maybe no greater spitting in the eye of God than seeing morbias twice with the limited time that he has given you on this earth
twice with the limited time that he has given you on this earth. Each man gets three score and ten, I don't think so, I'm seeing it for me, it's a second time.
You're all...
You're all...
You're all...
You're all...
You're all...
You're all...
You're all...
You're all...
You're all...
You're all...
You're all...
You're all...
You're all...
You're all...
You're all... You're all... You're all... You're all... You're all... I have truth at best.
No, I just wanted to say that I was such wise.
Now you get only this second time.
I mean, the second time I do get something,
which is this first scene is set up
as if it's going to be a framing device.
Everything in watching movies,
movie language taught me to think like,
okay, this is a scene.
We're seeing a bit of it now.
We're going to return to this point at some part of the movie.
We never return to this point.
This is not a framing device, this is just like,
we wanna see bats up top, and then we'll get into
chronologically telling the story.
But in between Dr. Michael Morbius being a child
and being an adult soon to be vampire man, there is this
scene that we saw earlier.
Yeah, I think.
Yeah, it's told out of order in a kind of a magical realist sort of thing.
Gabriel Garcia Marquez style.
Yeah, it's a brilliant work of work.
You expect Michael Morbius to get surrounded by bats and turn and face the camera and say,
hey guys, you're probably wondering how I got here.
Yeah.
This hairdresser smocked, surrounded by bats.
Cool guy like me.
We're more and over the course of the movie, but we don't.
No, we don't.
No, we do learn.
But anyway, so Morbius cuts his hand and holds the bloody cut up to the trap.
And of course, because bats, like sharks, I guess, can detect a little bit of blood in just
a lot of air, the bats rush out of that cave to get out that sweet blood
and the crew of the helicopter runs away as Morbius
stands up to the bats bravely
and lets them, I guess, lick at his hands
because then we cut to grease.
It says 25 years earlier, even though it seems like
the 1950s, but this is like 1997.
And we meet young Michael Morbius,
not yet the kind of guy who would stick his bloody hand
against a bunch of bats
And he loves origami. That's important.
And he lives at a hospital because he's got a rare blood disorder that makes it hard for his body to do stuff and
He's watched over by a meal Nicholas. That's a technical term. I mean, they don't really go into it much
Dr. Amiel Nicholas played by Jared Harris, one of my favorites. And he that's right. He went to him, which Dr. Emil Nickless played by Jared Harris, one of my favorites. And he went to Jared twice.
So I'm retaining my strength all the time.
So Dr. Jared Harris goes, oh, there's
this new kid Lucian.
And Morbius goes, all the kids who sleep in the bed next to me
are named Milo.
Your name's Milo now.
And inexplicably, they're now best friends.
Yeah, and also later, as Stuart and Charlene pointed out
when we're watching it,
Jared Harris refers to this kid as Milo.
It just becomes his name.
It's crazy, these are.
I was supposed to like this guy
who has put this other name on this kid.
Yeah.
That's not how names work usually.
And they've got this rare genetic disease.
They need infusions of blood three times a day.
Very rough.
And across the street, a bunch of mean Greek teens
heckle them.
Oh, those Greek teens.
Oh, that's what the movie Greece was about, how mean they are.
So one day, Lucy and Bass is out,
because his blood machine breaks down. And Michael Morbius fixes it just in time. He's just a kid, but he knows is out because his blood machine breaks down, and Michael
Morby is fixed at just in time.
He's just a kid, but he knows how to fix this blood machine, and Dr. Jared Harris is
like, you should go to a school for gifted kids, and Michael writes a letter to my list
slash Lucy and saying, hey, this isn't goodbye, I'm going to find a cure for us.
And then my little go outside, he immediately goes outside and the Greek team sees him and
beat him up.
Yeah, immediately without his dark protector.
But, no, it's funny to me that Jared Harris is like,
Oh, there's a school for gifted teens.
He's like, do you know a team of scientists had to design that machine and you fix it with
a spring from this pen?
I'm like, yeah, he didn't have to rebuild the machine.
I mean, I, look, I couldn't fix some Milo's machine.
If you put that as a test to me.
But I don't think it's like amazing that he's like,
oh, the power.
I need to link the power.
Like, he acts like, I don't know.
I'm just standing off to spring school
to be a spring scientist.
Yeah, he's the world's greatest springologist.
And it is like, he's like, you defeated their machine.
You must be smarter than him.
So cut to, I guess, which 25 years later,
from the place we just were,
because Dr. Michael Morbius has all grown up
and getting the Nobel Prize for creating artificial blood
and Jared Harris was presenting it to him,
which seems weird.
He's not on the Nobel Committee,
in which case he should have recused himself
if his former patient and friends and
Brodice is winning also if anything he looks younger than he did 20 years ago
Harris does not Michael morebius
Michael
Take care of himself. Yeah, and the thing is they specifically say that the synthetic blood Dr.
Michael Morbius invented has saved more people than penicillin which is a lot
That's a lot of people. That's a lot of people.
A lot of people.
That's like, the biggest effect a superhero's had on the world.
It's far better than the other stuff superheroes do, usually.
Every now and then they save the world.
Yeah, destroying the Sequovia.
Oh, wow.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Whoever talks about that these days, it's amazing.
These good works came from this bad boy, Michael Morbius, played by Jared Leto, a genuine
real-life bad boy
Who I look supposedly does bad things?
So but we learn in the next scene that he rejected the Noah Prize despite being there at the ceremony
So I guess he waited through the whole
Could have been an email. He showed up his mentor talked about what a great dude is he gets up to the podium
And I guess was like peace is sucks walks away
And he never really gives a reason, I think, as to why he.
Yeah, he just wanted to hear everything through him
as he stormed up.
He goes, I feed off your head, I feed off your hate, boom.
I think he says, like, I can't accept an award
for something that was a mistake,
which speaking of Pena Sillin, correct me if I'm wrong.
They're like, it just seems like, yeah, just take the award.
Take the job you do.
Well, considering Dustin Hoffman won a Nobel Prize
for the moment in Midnight Cowboy
when a car almost hits him and he goes,
hey, I'm walking here, which was also a mistake.
That wasn't supposed to happen.
I can't believe that he got Nobel prizes
for moments in movies.
It was a thin year.
It was a very thin year for physics.
That was the physics Nobel Prize.
So Dr. Morbys is telling us all to a child patient who
thinks he's a real badass for turning down the Nobel.
And he's with his love interest slash partner, Dr. Martin
Bankroft, who says that you are pushing yourself too hard.
This isn't good for you.
But she's figured out his secret, that in his secret lab, which is across the hall from where his patients are, he has been mixing human DNA
with bat DNA. And he's got a big tube, and when you press a button, it flills with bats
like a money-tombing bomb.
He's got a fucking bat-zone in his-
And sometimes they'll be talking and we'll hear it like muffled as if we're in the bat-zone
watching them, and then the camera just pans on to the bat zone and we hear them
normal it's crazy. It doesn't it's not it doesn't really work is what you're saying.
And you were pointing out earlier that he's acting as if he's hiding these
bats. Yes. If you just turn the lights on in the bat zone you see the bat.
That's show up. Someone's got to clean that room. Is Michael Morbius doing the
janitorial duties for that room?
I think so.
Oh, some science myth that there's a lot of guano in there.
Well, that's really, there's no,
there's no thing, the tube is guano-free,
which means someone is really working hard.
This bats shit like crazy.
And that stuff is phosphorus heavy.
So anyway, she finds this big tube of bats.
And he is like, you know, that vampire bats live
has a unique anti-coagulant, and if humans could make that, it would cure my disorder.
And it's like, hold on, dude.
So would you be like spitting into your own blood?
That doesn't make any sense.
Hold on.
And this is the first part where the movie is sort of slowly establishing over the course
of the film that vampire bats are magic in some way, and that they have supernatural
powers without ever going so far as to say it.
And there's a lot of points in the movie that would make more sense if they were like, oh yeah, Bats are magic.
Instead of this kind of made up science stuff.
Okay.
It's my favorite Bat Store in Brooklyn, Bats are Magic.
Yeah.
It's some local humor for those listening over the podcast.
Yeah, people listening to the recording are also in Brooklyn.
Yeah.
And she's like, this is too much.
You shouldn't tamper in God's domain and he's like, big things only come from bushing
boundaries.
There's so many reasons.
Do you?
Well, but there are limits.
I mean, but on the other hand.
There are limits, but this is definitely one of those things where it's just like, you're
tampering in God's domain.
And it's like, yeah, I guess, but in real life, you know, combining yourself with a bat
doesn't turn you into a vampire.
I'm like, are you?
Are mind you, Dan, this is a movie.
I get it.
I just, I think that you pointed out how, like,
conspiratorial thinking has been unhealthy for the world.
I think there are a lot of these Frankenstein derivatives
that are like, oh, science will inevitably lead
to monsters running a monk. And it's just like, like, oh, science will inevitably lead to monsters running a muck!
And it's just like, no, no, science,
it's gonna help us, guys, she'll have.
Yeah, worst case scenario, there's thousands of nuclear weapons
just lying around, but that's okay.
Okay, not all science.
I'm just saying it's a double-edged science story.
Who not?
Who's not?
I, and you found a counter example, I guess,
everything I said was wrong.
I didn't, I don't even know what AR stands for in AR-15, Dan, debate me.
Anyway, so, anyway, so I don't really think that.
Anyway, so, anyway, Morbius is like, I'm just injecting a mouse with this human bet DNA
and the mouse dies immediately.
But then they get called away and they come back, that mouse is doing great. It's up and kicking. It works. And it's not like this little costume
on. It looks like a real vampire. Yeah, that is it would have been so amazing. They
came back and the mouse they're like, wait a minute, this mouse isn't showing up in a
mirror. Hold on. I'll just feed the mouse. Let's offer it this girlicky pizza
sauce. Oh, it's shrinking away from it. Well, it's just the cheese, but not the
garlic. I'll just do what I always do every day
and baptize this mouse in holy water.
Oh, he's burning.
So, and this is the point where my notes are wrote.
They put a patient in a coma, and that's why I wrote my notes.
Lido's performance is to date Tacoma Toast itself,
because this is a guy who's supposed to be kind of like
a charismatic bad boy of medicine.
I don't know if you guys felt the same way.
It's almost like he is already dead throughout the movie. This is a guy who's supposed to be kind of like a charismatic bad boy of medicine. I don't know if you guys felt the same way.
It's almost like he is already dead throughout the movie.
His energy is so low.
And I wondered if he, and not like Han Solo, who's charismatic and full of energy.
His energy is so low that it's hard for him to carry a whole movie.
And I wonder, do you think he was doing this because we all know we've all heard the stories.
That he was so into this character that he figured this character would have trouble going to the bathroom.
So I will also have trouble going to the bathroom.
And he was taking so long to go to the bathroom in between takes that it was putting the movie behind schedule.
So do you think that he was also like this character would be very low energy because he doesn't have a lot of...
Elliot, Elliot, was that a...
That's a true story. I have to check.
Apparently would... You know joke about story. I have to check. Apparently would... Couldn't tell you.
You joke about Jared Little or something like that.
I mean, this is a story I heard.
I wasn't there.
He apparently limp on his crutches to the bathroom.
And I guess, you know, close the door at privacy.
And we nobody knows what was going on there.
But it was taking so long for him to go use the bathroom
and come back that it was putting them behind schedule.
They had to come up with a compromise
which is someone would wheel him to the bathroom
in a wheelchair. And just not like, I mean, like had to come up with a compromise, which is someone who would wheel him to the bathroom in a wheelchair.
And just like you as a man with two children,
probably understands the joy of going to the bathroom
and staying there for a while.
Oh, yeah, by myself.
Yeah, I was talking about with them.
I thought, no, no.
With them when my child goes, my child's
who can use the bathroom by himself,
it goes, come with me to the bathroom.
I want you in the room, but turn around.
Don't look at me.
It's like, this is weird. I'm so. Before the show, I'll wait for you to go into the bathroom, but I want you in the room but turn around don't look at me. No, it's like, this is weird.
I'm so-
Before the show was waiting, I went to the bathroom.
Oh yeah, very much so.
Yeah, oh, I'd love to go in there, read for a while, you know, anyway, but that's besides the point.
The point is, guys, why is Jared let us so, so nonexistent in this?
Meaning that's what he thinks a smart person does.
Oh.
Like maybe he thinks a smart person leans against stuff and closes their eyes a lot.
Okay I believe it. Okay. The thingy leans on her crutches and his long hair and special effects.
So Michael goes to visit his friend, Grown-up Milo, who he still calls Milo, and he's become kind
of a decadent waste roll who's still attended to by Dr. Jared Harris. Played by a doctor who?
kind of a decadent waste roll who's still attended to by Dr. Jared Harris. Played by a Dr. Who?
Yep, that's true.
That's what Matt Smith, right?
Yep, Matt Smith.
Yep.
And Milo tells Michael, hey, whatever you do, if you find a cure, I'm back in you 100%
with my money.
And more business like, well, it might not be turning away and going, and I'm doing.
And he goes, okay, I'll do it.
You do whatever you need to, but don't fall in love.
Hold on.
Which just seems like unnecessary advice.
Not only does he say it might not be technical legally,
he's like, we need to do it in international waters.
Yeah.
Cut to a chiron of a ship.
That says international waters.
International waters, now look,
I'm not going to pretend to be an expert
on maritime law, but,
and the topic seems fairly complex.
That's why there are people who go to law school for it.
You're people who specialize just in that kind of law.
But in my...
In my law about how much time it takes to marry somebody.
In my cursory...
My cursory googling of international law...
One half of the audience loved that joke.
And the other half did not like it.
Which makes...
We're in Brooklyn in support city. There's half of the people here that joke. The other half did not like it. Which makes, we're in Brooklyn in support city.
There's half of the people here
who work in the maritime industry.
My, my, my, my-
The Steve Adors were not having that.
Yeah, they're over there.
Frank Sabaka's scowling at you.
My brief research confirmed what I suspected to be true,
which is that international waters
is not the criminals' panacea of that.
You're saying that popular culture would have us believe that.
You're saying if they wanted to do this experiment,
they would have to go on the money plane.
Yeah.
I'm saying that if you commit a crime in international waters,
you are subject to the laws of the country you're from.
Oh.
Oh.
So they're not trying to become a vampire.
I don't know, boat, I guess I'm saying.
So they're on a boat with a bunch of boat murmurs.
A boat murmur?
A boat murmur?
In case any pirates combine so, and they kept it now.
They've got these mercenaries.
And Michael Morbius and Martine,
she's on board with the experiment now.
What are really?
And they mix the thing and the computer says success.
Because I guess the computer knows.
And they banter and then he hands her an origami bat,
and she injects him with a serum.
And he starts convulsing like Norman Osborne
and hailing goblin gas.
And this crew member, this merc, come by.
Thank you for putting it into words on your scene.
Yeah, I got to, I got to, I'm like, what movie's this Stewart scene?
What in the story of Ricky Yoh could be in this?
And so crew map and this crewmate?
And the family, is there anything there?
He almost gets the point of ripping his own ding-dong off.
So this mercenary comes in and starts harassing Martine,
which is like, these people hired you. What are you doing?
And then they go into the morbid room, he's not in his chair.
That's right, he's hanging from the ceiling and he's got fangs now
He turned it to a vampire and the crew member is like, I'll shoot it
That doesn't work and morbid's a tax of him and bite some he's gone feral
And he just thrown himself around the cell and the crew comes in and they shove martin to the floor and he hits her
She hits her head and morbid's just killing everybody in bullet time and we get some cool morbidus scenes as he is stalking the crew through the ship
But this is like the weird like the the mer, the merks are on the ship.
Yeah.
Let's be honest.
So there's someone that, uh, Dr. Michael Morbius, the living vampire, can murder.
Yes.
That we don't feel all that bad about.
Yeah, they're already bad dudes.
Yeah.
Yeah, but we saw them back with me.
Because it's like, isn't this your buddy Matt Smith's boat?
Why do you have these angry men with automatic weapons
who are arguing with you at all times?
Anyway, it's a good question.
I mean, this is the first real action scene we see.
So the action is, there's a lot of like smoke trails
coming off of Morbius.
Yeah, he's, I read that.
He's both very fast and also very slow sometimes.
So he's constantly followed by these kind of either purple
or black smoke trails, depending on what he's wearing at the time. And I read, or at least the Amazon Prime
trivetall meet was loosely, it was inspired by Pokemon movements. So, because I got what makes sense
because in this movie they got to catch them all all being vampires. Yeah, I mean later on,
later on we sort of are able to surmise that these weird CGI trails are kind of his echolocation,
kind of like airflow around him.
Yes, something like that.
And at times, I honestly...
It's not carbon neutral, let's just say that.
Honestly, there are a couple times where I thought this looks cool.
And a lot of the time, it looked like CGI mush, especially towards the end.
Yeah, one of his powers is he can do echolocation like a bat
where he kind of zones out and his ears get little ripples.
He can really rakely and ripples.
And it's kind of like, it's basically
detective mode from the Arkham games.
Yeah, he's, it's, well, we'll get to his full power set.
When he tells us about it in the video.
Oh, sorry.
Anyway, Morbius wakes up.
And now he's back to normal. Except he's jacks now. He's no be a... Anyway, Morbius wakes up, and now he's back to normal,
except he's Jack's now.
He's no longer the frail Michael Morbius
who looked like Samuel Jackson in Glass.
Now he's like Michael Morbius,
who worked out for a movie role.
And he finally puts on a shirt
and he walks to the wreckage of the boat
and checks Martin, he can hear her heartbeat,
and watches a security video of him killing everybody,
and is so sick and he throws up,
I assume the blood that he drank. And he calls for an emergency airlift but takes the vials of Batman
Serum but they never say Batman and it and that's here's where we get the stars of the movie FBI agents
Al Madrigal and Tyree Skipson and I will say this
Al Madrigal Al Madrigal friend of the show he's been on our podcast. I thought he came out probably the best of anyone in this
Yeah, he made a meal of this. Yeah, he was, he had a bunch of funny jokes.
He did not embarrass himself.
I want to see more of him in the movie.
Terry's, he's, Terry's is fine.
Terry's is fine as the guy that Alts has jokes to and he goes,
mm-hmm, and the most like.
Yeah, and he's light down by being the tough cop
where's Al's the funny cop.
Yeah.
And they're investigating the find out all the security footage
was wiped and the bodies were drained of blood.
Martin is the only survivor, because Michael Morbius has
disappeared.
And Milo sees this story on the news.
I do like that the police are immediately
like it's a vampire.
Yeah, they do not.
They're no questions.
They're immediately like it's a vampire.
Without an APB for a guy with a widow's peak, who doesn't drink
wine.
Like it's got APB all-pointed.
But if Jared let us walk around, you're like, who doesn't drink wine. It's got APV all- Cheerlead. If Jared let us walk in around, you're like,
it's that fucking two.
Yeah.
Come on.
He does so much to make it obvious that he's a monster.
He's always wearing like a hood, real scary like,
and skulking around.
But I did enjoy that that usually in horror movies.
There's the part where someone goes,
look, these bodies roll trained of blood.
It's a vampire.
And they're like, sure it is, pal.
Throw them in the crazy hatch.
And then, no, you gotta believe me.
And a vampire's a killing person after person.
They're like, ah, what's going on here?
But here, yeah, they're like, it's a vampire.
We see movies in old vampires.
A fucking boat shows up with a bunch of boatmurks.
Dramed a boat.
That's a drank of a move to the end.
That is Dracula.
I mean, that's how he shows up.
There was a vampire in Brooklyn just last month.
Dan, I hate to tell you, it was actually almost 30 years ago.
You were old.
How old are you?
You age quite a bit.
It is pretty balsy of them to have a boat full of dead bodies show up since that literally
does happen in Dracula.
I wish Al had just been holding the cliff notes of Dracula and put them down and was like,
seems like I'm am rye all right.
Um, it all fits.
And Milo sees us on the news and is like,
duck small boat.
And so more of us, he goes to his lab.
The serum is wearing off, which leaves him weak.
And he's drinking bags of artificial blood for strength.
He has this overpowering urge to drink blood.
And he tells us in voiceover, because I guess he started
a journal that when he drinks blood he feels like...
Yeah, he's like, toxic who's a little vape pet.
Yeah, he's physically strong and he parkhors around his office and he's got, he can hang
up, say, not like a bat, and the bats welcome him, he says, like a brother, which is ridiculous.
And he's got a location out like Stuart says, he has kind of ruffles ears and stuff.
But the artificial blood is losing its effectiveness for him.
Soon he'll have to choose between drinking the blue,
the artificial blood or the red,
the blood of real live people who have blood in them.
It's always about politics.
Yeah.
And Milo goes to Michael's lab and Michael's like,
I need some blood, I'm real Jones in for it.
And Milo's like, hey, here's some fake blood.
Wow, you're strong, have you been working out?
And he goes, I want that cure too.
And Morbius goes, no, it's not a cure.
It's a curse, go, go.
But later that night, a nurse is attacked
by something vampire in the hospital,
which also sometimes seems like the power
to make the lights flicker on and on.
Well, so is the vampire just standing there
pressing the switch?
It's like, it's like, you know, power saving lights.
It's supposed to like follow you as you go down the hall
and turn off that part makes sense.
But then later on, like, all of the lights just sort of shut down
even though they're still like the vampire's still eating her.
So I don't know.
The answer is the director thought it would look cool.
I like how you started out kind of explaining it,
like it's okay.
And then you end up admitting that it didn't make any sense. No, no, no, no, no, that made sense. It sounds like you started out kind of explaining it, like it's okay, and then you end up admitting
that it didn't make any sense.
No, no, no, no, that made sense.
It sounds like you're explaining it to the victim
up before they get killed by a favorite.
Like don't worry about that, you'll be fine.
You'll work.
You'll look really cool.
The lights are not your real issue.
Don't worry about them, there's a vampire stalking you.
So the next day, Morbius was there at work or something,
and he hears people going, hey, they found this nurse's body
drained a blood, and he's and he hears people going, hey, they found this nurse's body drained a blood
and he's like, oh, oh, oh, oh.
And Alan Tirees tried to arrest him,
but he escapes by climbing up the inside
of a big Guggenheim style stairwell.
And then he goes to the roof
and then I couldn't put on her stand this.
He almost gets blown off the roof.
What was this about, like by what wind?
What was this telling us?
Yeah, I mean, I think he, like,
later on he flies on wind like a vampire does, right?
He can glide on.
Air currents, but was this trying to be like,
he's suddenly his bones are lighter now,
so he can't stand up to the wind as well on this roof.
Oh, no.
Probably.
It's just a very, it makes him look like a real whoo.
And especially because Tari's ketchup is on.
My one weakness, wind.
So, so he runs away from the police,
and then the next time we see him,
he's in like a maximum security prison,
and I'm like, that guy almost got a fucking Nobel Prize,
and they don't have any actual evidence against him, right?
Other than the fact that he did it,
because he's a creepy person.
I mean, the evidence, I guess, okay,
what, let's say we're the, we're the DA,
we're making the case against Michael Morbius.
Okay, so we know Michael Morbius is a pretty weirdo
with a two-fold bat.
The weird date of being in the straight, we're playing.
OK, yeah.
And we know that a nurse that works with Michael Morbius
has been drained of blood.
Who are the suspects?
There's a guy with a big tuba bat.
So let's start with him.
I don't know who our other suspects are
because there's almost no other cast members.
And it's certain what we have to start suspecting
the FBI agents, because they're the only ones left in the cast.
I mean, I think that what's his face, Jared Harris, you know, as far as I recall, he's
more yardy.
So he might be.
Okay, fair, okay, cool.
And he's also, you know, a Russian nuclear physicist.
So that's, yeah, that's hard.
And yeah, you're right, other than the fact that Morbius is a possibly known vampire, that's
the spirit of the world. Which is kind of wild that he is a medial even person.
Yeah.
And America's most beloved citizen, Dr. Michael Morbius, under arrest tonight.
But it's such a great story.
Nobel rejecting scientist, arrested for vampire murder.
Oh, it's like the headlines write itself.
That's the headline.
It's anyway. It didn't write itself, I said it.
But you know what I mean.
So, Morbius, he's in jail and he's like,
the fake blood isn't working.
I don't know what to do.
And the FBI agents interrogate him and Jared
let us go in feral and he's like, I'm hungry.
You don't want to see me when I'm hungry.
Which is like, I guess they're a little joke version
of the Hulk's angry line, but he should have said,
hangry.
He said, you would like me when I'm hangry.
And then Tyree should be like, what's that?
And I'll be like, it's the thing the kids say.
It's hungry and angry together.
You're so hungry that you're angry.
So this fantasy version, you're...
So this fantasy version, why would you just say angry?
Explaining slaying to Tyree.
Al, explaining, explaining, slaying to Tyree.
Okay.
Considering all respect to Tyree, he is a man who saw a fake Mark Scorsese quote saying
that Morbius had changed his mind about superhero movies
being cinema, retweeted it, and then had to take it down.
It was a real deal that it was a fake.
That makes me feel sad.
It is a little sad.
That makes me feel sad.
It shows a fair amount of misunderstanding
of Mark Scorsese's thinking.
But anyway, Milo goes to visit Morbius,
and Morbius is like, maybe I did kill her,
and Morb no I was like, there's no way you did it.
There's no way you did it.
And then he leaves, and throws his cane away,
and stops limping, because he obviously did it.
Like, he's a vampire now.
He leaves a blood bag in his cane,
and the corrections officers like, I don't know,
fucking bear.
In Morbius itself.
It'll pay me if I can.
I could understand if the guard is going to overlook
a bag of fake blood.
Because maybe they're going to have a prank show.
Well, that cane, a heavy tipped cane has been left behind.
Usually, I don't know, what ever.
Also, that Milo goes, oh, this guy's
going to do a Kaiser Susie thing and walk away.
That Milo is like, I'm his lawyer.
I'll go in.
And I guess they never check to see if he's a lawyer or anything
like that.
Like this, anyway, yeah, he obviously, even more of his at this point. I was watching him, and I guess they never checked to see if he's a lawyer or anything like that like this anyway the uh yeah he obviously even more of you at this point I was watching
me and I'm like how long is going to take moron more be as to realize Milo did it the more
be I realize as it instantly uh he drinks the blood Milo behind turns into a vampire and
just smashes through the wall because vampires can smash through cement he tracks Milo down
and finds him right after Milo eats a news vendor who's mildly rude to him. And Milo's like, yeah, I killed that nurse.
Anyway, more be a embrace being a vampire.
It's totes cool.
Because this is what vampire movies about white people
are about.
As I said in my presentation before the show,
Lister's the pie, I guess you missed it.
White people vampire movies are about how it's kind of cool
and sexy to be like a criminal vampire who drinks blood
and is kind of damned, but kind of cool.
Because you know you're kind of damned but kind of cool
because you know you're kind of getting you're gonna get forgiven for it later when you get a job at your
dad's company or whatever so it's but you can be a vampire for a little bit and sew your wild
blood oats and then go away but they do a vampire fight which leads them into a subway station labeled
front street very it's a very New York style, it's curved tunnel and British style escalators.
It is really a, it's an amazing new-
There's a crumbit selling station.
Yeah.
The fact that, the fact that as they're fighting,
they pass Paddington only proves that it's a New York station.
Would you like some Marmelade on your ticket
as is traditional here in New York City?
If Paddington had been there,
would have raised the fucking steak so high
because I would have been like,
don't touch that beautiful bit.
Yeah.
I mean, almost every action movie
the steaks are higher in Paddington's there.
Look, the convicts have taken over the plane
and Paddington's on that plane.
Yeah.
The planes fall of snails and Paddington.
The only good thing in this world, Paddingding. And this world padding dead.
Why someone selling padding didn't blame tickets.
The president's plane is being taken over by terrorists
and padding tin is on that plane.
And we're in the movie theater now.
It's like, Stuart, where are you going?
And I'm like, I got to get on that fucking plane.
Got to save that beautiful bear.
Just like Mark Wahlberg if I was there.
Nothing would happen.
A lot of bad behavior we're referring to tonight.
Okay, so a lot of bad boys, the literal sense of doing bad things when they were boys.
So, okay, so they're fighting, they're in this very fake New York station,
which they didn't even give the name of a real subway station.
Front street is a real street.
It used to be the eastern part of the island.
It's all over. Until the landfill is in great and more of a downtown. Anyway.
That's right today.
But they don't have a station there. Anyway. And Milo fights some cops for a minute, and
then he monologues for a little bit, and Morbius is like, I'm going to cure you. They're
about to find the platform when Morbius realizes something. Wind. The kind of wind that comes
when a train is coming into the tunnel.
And he stands there for seemingly 17 hours,
putting his hand into the wind to kind of gauge
the aerodynamics, and then he just suddenly,
whoop, glides away on the wind in front of the subway train.
And it looks so silly, it looks so ridiculous.
Like a human leaf, like it's...
I'm gonna snopes this and tell the audience that human beings are not shaped properly to take advantage
of Bernoulli's principle.
Okay?
We will not cause a lift and we cannot glide
on the wind like a leaf.
Just in case you want to try that.
Don't try.
At home.
When you're on...
When you're on the subway platform tonight
and you feel that wind coming, that beautiful wind...
Step back. Step back. Please stand away from the platform edge. Do that right off the bat.
A helpful voice will tell you the same thing in kind of a passive aggressive way.
And then, but do not really fight the urge to jump in front of that train and fly home
because it is not going to work out well for you.
You will go home, but only in the way that that sailors drowning. Only the way
that sailors were drowning say it feels like going hard. Like a spiritual, we'll
speak of talking. Yeah, yeah, spiritual. You'll go home to the creator. Yeah, you
won't go to your apartment. And your cat will be like, where is this guy?
He should have the decent seat to die in my, in his home so he can eat him. Dan, you beat me to it.
You beat me to it by half a second. No, I'm proud of you. Anyway, so...
So, Morbius finds Martian and he feels ready, he's like, hey, I'm a vampire now.
And while they're at a cafe or a diner or something,
he overhears some thugs talking about crime.
And then he follows them to an underground science crime lab
and throws them all out and makes it his own
crime lab.
And this, this scene raises so many questions about how the world is.
We thought it was a counter-fitting lab, but he's going to use it for like biological
science.
Yeah.
The thugs are trying to pass a counterfeit hundred and the woman working the registers
like, this is fake, I can't take it, he's like, well how about you take one for yourself
and I'm like, that one's fake too, dude.
Hey, she just doesn't want trouble.
Then you take this one.
It's totally real.
Don't use the pen on it.
Don't.
Sir, it has a picture of William Frakes on it.
This is not a real, anyway.
So is that top cat?
This is.
How about when somebody takes over?
How about my buddy John Lithgow, things you should take it?
Nothing but respect for not, President.
I don't understand.
You know, when they take over this, when they take over the printing press lab, he does
the bit from the trailer where the thug whose hand is being shattered is like, who are you
and he says, I'm Venom.
And in the trailer he's like, huh, I'm actually Michael Morbys, but that isn't in the movie.
No.
So he just tells the guy he's Venom and that's it.
It doesn't make sense.
And now he gets to be a,
so that guy thinks Venom came in and bothering him.
He's like, Venom flew all the way across the country.
And there's, and there's the, the other earlier,
Al's like, this is weird.
Like that thing in San Francisco.
And it was like, oh, I get it.
Venom went away.
And they just says, I'm Venom.
It's like, all right, well then why,
why were they beating around the bush earlier?
I don't know.
But yeah, so now he's, he's stolen a crime lab. He, I mean, killed a bunch of people on a boat. He's like, all right, well then why would he be beaten around the bush earlier? But yeah, so now he's stolen a crime lab.
I mean, he killed a bunch of people on a boat.
He's stolen a crime lab.
He's unfairly cast as fursions at Venom.
Very difficult.
And meanwhile, Venom's having troubles of his own
on the other side of the country,
dealing with Woody Harrel since Wig.
So anyway.
And Milo threatens Martine at the lab.
So Martine goes to Michael Morbius' crime lab,
which I guess he sent her an address change note,
so she would know to go there.
And she cuts herself, and he smells it,
and he's tempted by her blood.
And so they go up to the roof and kiss,
because she's turned on by his bloodlust.
It's like he says that a wakens a primal hunger in him.
And she goes me too.
She doesn't really say me too, but you know.
It's like you get purger king together. And then they get purger king. I'm a weakens of primal hunger in here. And she goes, me too, she doesn't really say me too, but you know. And then they get burger thing together.
And then they get burger,
yeah, I'm under burger king.
Why don't we have it our way?
And they go, they go,
do you want, so do I.
And he goes,
I don't drink soda.
Unless I can use the cup to mix
all the different sodas
in the dispenser together.
Not even diet soda.
No studies have shown that an asshole can
dream it to obesity.
It's still not as good for you as Walter.
OK, but if you press the water thing,
it's in the minute-made, so you're still
going to get a little bit of juice in there.
Ah!
All right, I'll take a two-litre soldier.
He turned into Max once side over the end.
Yeah, I love it.
This is just him and him and that movie where he moves to the United States and settles a farm.
What's it called?
But he's a strange form.
No, that's not, neither of those, never mind.
Okay.
So the FBI agents, they see the surveillance video of the killing.
They see it's Milo, not Morbius.
Morbius in Clear is named modern technology.
There's a lot of those things where they pull up the CCTV footage and they're like computer
and hands. It's this perfect image of where they pull up the CCTV footage and they're like computer and hands.
It's this perfect image of Matt Smith
who we had previously seen dancing.
Did we talk about him dancing?
So we haven't yet got to the,
oh, did we just skip the dancing?
He's fucking feeling himself.
Oh, baby.
Oh, you know what?
Because he's like, you know what,
we skip the dancing.
Let's talk about this.
The thing is, he's close, still fit,
even though he's way more jacked.
Here's the thing, here's the thing.
So one, he's very rich.
You could have had them tailored that, Dano.
That's true.
And exercising, he's dancing.
And then every night, he just throws him
in front of the mirror like a vampire face like,
into the mirror.
Like he's like a kid getting ready for the prom.
He's constantly fucking face more face.
It's crazy.
I will say, okay, let's take a moment to try for the face.
So is that science or magic?
Or is that science or magic?
Because it happens really fast.
I mean, science of special effects that make
his face more of like that.
What do you mean in the movie?
Yeah, I mean in the movie.
There's no supposed to be magic or something.
There's no magic mentioned in the movie,
so you gotta do it.
So it's supposed to be really like,
making more of that fast.
Yeah, that's what that fast is.
Vampire Bat to DNA.
Vampire Bat's more of their faces all the time. Yeah, that's why bad vampire bat to DNA. Vampire bats morph their faces all the time.
Yeah, that's why that's why vampire bats they go.
And they morph their teeth?
Yeah, yeah.
No, they don't morph their teeth.
Vampire bats are the same teeth all the time.
They don't even have face.
They have kind of little saws that they used to cut open
their necks and they lap up the blood.
They don't even suck the blood.
They just lap it up.
Like a cat again, cats.
Anyway, so, but we should, it's, my low is really feeling so, so let's take a look, let's
talk about the CGI effects, because I actually thought, they did a, they thought they did a
really good job with the CGI face of X this.
I'll give the effects people credit.
By the end of the movie, all, as with all action movies, the effects kind of fall apart a
little bit, but, but early on, I was like, they're doing a good job of giving him a little
more of these no-nose, because of you as the cast has never knows.
Yeah, there's no nose.
Is that your aliphate no-nose?
This week's aliphate no-nose.
Look, you see Jai to take someone's nose off their face, don't do it, they're on a
plastic way and just cut it with a knife because that's not okay.
He does that kind of town.
Yeah, it's hot on this stage.
Alright.
I assume it's also hot in the audience.
Alright, absolutely FBI is like, hey, it's Milo.
It's not Morbius, which is they shouldn't show up on cameras
if they're really vampires, but I guess they didn't.
They're living vampires, Ellie.
Good point.
It's also one of those movies where the cops are like,
how are we going to see who did this?
And Tyrese looks up and sees a security camera
and goes close circuit TV.
It's like, yeah, that's the first thing you should check,
dude. But Jared Harris sees the news. And they like, yeah, that's the first thing you should check, dude.
But Jared Harris sees the news, and they talk about Morbius,
and the news, they say, dubbed the vampire killer.
And I was like, say, dubbed the living vampire.
It's his name.
Like, this is a tagline.
But anyway, Jared Harris goes to Milo and says,
I can help you.
And Milo's like, I want to help on the vampire,
and he slashes Jared Harris' belly.
And he goes a bunch.
He hits him with his like sonic boom punch.
He has his special move where he punches you and then like sound radiating.
Yeah, because it sounds, because bats.
And so, and Martin and Morbius, they create an antibody that kills bats and humans.
We would just call that poison, but I guess he needs special science for it.
And then he makes two shots, one for Milo,
and one for himself, because by tomorrow,
he's gonna need human blood.
And Jared Harris is like, Morbius, come find me,
and Morbius goes, and Jared Harris is dying there.
And then Morbius, using his super hearing,
he picks up Milo threatening Martine,
and he casts an echolocation wave
over the entire island of Manhattan,
and manages to narrow target in on Martins heartbeat on top of a building.
That's nuts. And so, and he's all morbbed up now and he leaps up and he glides across the
updrafts of the city, trailing purple magic smoke like just the, just the, the contraining
is. Yeah. But it's, and she goes there and she's like, drink my blood, make my death
mean something. And he's like, no, no, and he kisses her, and she bites his lip, but then he gets her blood,
and he drinks, and she dies.
Yeah, and she gets a, there's like a bit of splash pack.
There's a CGI blood that falls off.
Now, Ali, when you're watching this,
did you start singing to yourself?
Feet on me, when you're not strong.
I didn't.
You drink my blood.
Now, it's very good.
It helps you carry on. No, I didn't. You drink my blood. Now, that's very good. It helps you carry on.
No, I didn't.
Hey, Al, did you start singing this third is a vampire?
I did it.
I did it.
I did it.
Set to suck.
You did it.
Yeah.
And he roars, and he's going to go out.
And Milo's applauding.
He's right there, and they fight.
They plumbed off a building through a construction site.
This building, they're plomting through,
is roughly 4,000 feet tall.
And then they smashed with a ground and fallen
other 4,000 feet.
Yeah, it's like a weird cave underneath.
No, no.
It's like a sewer canyon.
Yeah.
Now I got to tell you, I like, when we watched
this this afternoon, we couldn't figure out how to
dim the lights in the room we were in.
So this was all just like a mission.
You could feel that, had a hit the lights.
Tant, tant, tant, tant, tant, tant, tant, that's metallic anyway, so. You felt left out when we were saying you didn this was all just like... You could feel that, had a... Hit the lights, tan, tan, tan, tan, tan, tan, tan, tan,
tan, that's metallic anyway, so...
Yeah, you felt left out when we were saying you didn't.
Yeah, I did. I did.
Anyway, so, so, maybe this is a great climax.
Dan Stewart, they watched it without me this afternoon
because I had family stuff to do.
I watched it on my own, again, on an iPad while doing the dishes.
So, maybe this is a movie theater, it was...
In the movie theater, it was...
All equally into here, so I will tell you.
There's a lot of fighting and there's blah, blah,
and there's smoke everywhere.
And they'll tell finally, Michael screams so loud
that it lets out an energy wave that attracts a huge horde
of bats who surround him and lift him up.
We've got his brothers.
Yeah, his brothers.
And I guess they give him strength.
And this would make so much more sense if it was magic.
But it's not.
It's science.
So it's kind of the way that I guess when you're
siking up for a varsity football game,
your team brothers all circle around, you're like,
do it, do it.
Yeah, you can do it.
It does, I assume they do, that I didn't play football.
And again, if it would be mad, if he was magically connected
to bats, it would make sense.
It doesn't.
It's all science.
And Michael attacks Milo with his last furious bat strength, and he saps him with the killer
serum, and more be a sadly devamps as his friends dies.
And the cops and FBI show up at this big hole in the street they made, and it looks so much
like they showed up in the Bob's Burgers movie.
And I wish it was just a little crossover.
It was not in a huge tornado of bats and merges.
Who knew there were so many vampire bats in the sewer canyons of New York?
I guess there are.
And Martine opens up her eyes.
She's now a vampire.
And Morbius flies up into the sky and then straight into the camera.
Credits.
Movie over.
This begins.
One by ten.
Number two.
Because, okay, the credits start.
And this is among the, some of the decisions made Morbius are baffling.
Some are not Baffling.
This is the most Baffling to me.
It's the first mid-credits scene.
There's two scenes are in the credits?
Yes, and it feels like nothing more than that,
the second episode of the Morbius TV show,
a couple scenes, were tacked on to this one,
to bring it to feature length.
Because this Batman movie already has one Joker,
now needs a second Batman, baby
Because we see where as the vulture Michael Keaton from Spider-Man coming home again is he teleports
He teleports into a prison cell and he goes, oh the food's better here or something instantly under
He's a fucking laugh line. It's amazing. It's a huge laugh line
And the news is and the news is, a hearing has been set for the man
who calls himself Adrian Tooms, who somehow mysteriously
appeared in a prison cell, but of course, not belonging
to this universe.
There are no crimes on his docket.
So why would we keep them in the prison?
We don't know.
And they let him go.
And you're like, what does that have to do?
Michael Morbius, that's really weird.
This guy from another dimension, I don't understand.
I mean, I love to see Michael. He's in all ways.
It's like, you know, and he's playing this character
of Birdman, best picture when he moved.
And so he's played a Batman.
He's played a man who played a Birdman,
and then he finally played a Birdman.
And so then we get credit scene number two,
where Morbius driving fast on a rural highway,
all charges dropped.
He's a legal vampire now.
It's like the end of short circuit, too.
He's the first vampire citizen, I guess.
And he stops and he checks his watch,
someone's late to the meeting and he moorbs up as the vulture.
Michael Keaton, infel armor with a mask on,
so it's probably not Michael Keaton, but it is his voice.
I want to pause here to say something very nerdy.
He swoops in using his normal vulture suit,
which I'm like, well, how do you get he built it?
Danny built another one.
But that's like from fucking Chitari like tech that he got because he's gonna
get a Chitar.
We do not team when the Avengers, you know, you know what I'm talking about.
This is space technology.
So in this one he used a Tariq.
I don't know.
Look, Dan, you just watched the Morbius movie.
Well, you're gonna you're gonna quit with how that're going to quit with how it's not built in.
I said it was goddamn nerdy.
Good point, fair point.
You're right.
You're notculated yourself against criticism.
I'm just saying this opens up a lot of questions.
It does open up a lot of questions.
And Vulture shows up.
And what's really funny is they were clearly not in the same place.
I mean, this is shot. He's like, either that or Gerald Ledo has taken not reacting with
the same level that his co-performer has to an amazing new degree.
And because a guy has just taken with huge turbine wings, has just landed in front of him,
and Morbius is like, hey, so.
And Vulture says, hey, I think we should team up.
Morbius goes, intriguing.
Cut to credits.
Why would this be intriguing?
Yeah, what?
He's not a superhero.
He's not a super villain.
He's a doctor who's also a vampire.
Why would it be intriguing to team up for one?
Intriguing because he's not either a criminal.
A potential sister, six movies, a thing that's so
on him, what's's new for some reason.
Are they going to co-author a paper on something?
What?
Yeah.
Yeah.
I guess we'll find out the answers whenever
the Craven movie comes out.
But it was such, it was almost part of me that was like movie.
You made yourself worthwhile by having
the most baffling scene I've ever seen.
It was like, yeah, these characters
show up in each other's movies.
And then they like hint that they're going to be in a movie together without ever wondering why these characters would show up in each other's movies and then they like hint that they're going to be in a movie together.
Without ever wondering why these characters would show up in each other's movies, they're
being a movie together.
These Sony post credits scenes are noty.
So we're going to on short on this one so far.
We're going to do our final judgments whether it's a good bad movie, a bad bad movie or
a movie we kind of like and I'll tell you something.
There's no video to cover this in the way that we do when we do streaming shows
but I'm gonna run in P as you give your final judgments wow
I just really I don't want to own most of other people wow I really need to
but I can hear I will hear you from sure yeah over your thunderous urine I'm
gonna say I'm gonna quickly say the first time I saw this in the theater, I was
like, oh, there's part of me that likes the first half of this movie that feels like an
old 90s superhero movie where people didn't think superhero movies were going to be successful
or something like that.
They try to hide that it's a superhero.
Yeah, they're like focusing on third tier cut characters,
but this is bad, but anyway, gotta go.
So.
Let's do well.
Dan runs off.
Can't defend his argument there.
He's first, he calls himself a nerd.
Can't argue with me.
I'm a nerd.
I'm not supposed to say this stuff.
And he's like, can't argue with me.
I'm not here in person.
I'm peeing. Yeah, I'm a nerd, I'm not supposed to say that stuff, but he's like, can't argue with me, I'm not here in person, I'm peeing.
Yeah, I don't know, it's tough. It's hard to say, this is a bad bad movie, it's
fairly boring, it has some good moments, but it's bad bad, come on.
Yeah, it's a bad movie, although I did not like it until Dan earlier said the
same thing to me about it, feeling like a 90s movie where they didn't really know
how to do superheroes, where suddenly, it's the thing that where a movie that is bad,
you see it when it's in theaters and you're like,
that was dumb.
And then 30 years later, you're like,
I'm kind of affectionate for that dumb stuff.
And then you see something that's like it and you're like,
this is dumb.
But you know what it reminds me of this other dumb thing
that I didn't like at the time.
But now I'm inexplicably nostalgic for.
Yeah, I mean, there's a couple of like the weird
detective mode bullshit I like. But come on, I mean, there's a couple like the weird detective mode bullshit I like.
But come on, I mean, it doesn't take any actual risks.
It's fairly boring.
Well, I mean, it's a movie that doesn't,
at no point during this, they were like,
what should a morpheus movie be about?
And it's such a, I'll give them credit.
It's hard to make a good movie about Morbius.
Let's just get it out there.
He's not a character with a lot of what I would call potential.
But well, someone yelled at molten man, of course,
my least favorite Spider-Man character.
And I'd saddled with a star with, let's say, not
the most star power.
Yeah.
And also, it's a movie that, I don't know, we've
enumerated a number of flaws.
Let's just say that the weird thing about this movie
is that the studio that made it didn't get the joke
of everyone on the internet pretending they wanted to see it
because it was so obviously not a thing
you would go out to see and just not understanding.
And there was something kind of purely beautiful about that.
In the world where people say sometimes
we live in a post-ironic world.
And this was the first time where I really felt it.
Where it was like, oh, they don't get that people
are ragging on this movie.
Like, they really think like PT Barnum set
or whatever that all publicity is good publicity.
And they're going to release this.
And people are going to go crazy for it.
And they didn't, because it's a character with,
and they were like, hey, nobody knew who the guardians
of the galaxy were.
And that made a Bafo Pio.
But it's a, there's something beautiful.
There's something beautifully naive about that.
Where, oh, dance back, everybody.
Dance back.
Dance back.
Didn't learn his lesson and his drinking with something.
Hey, it's John Moe, host of Dupresh Mode, a podcast about people's mental health journeys.
Guess who we got.
Guess who?
It's Jamie Lee Curtis.
I look at life now as the game of Guess Who, which is simply the process of elimination.
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That's how I found out who I am.
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It comes with a 100% happiness guarantee.
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Hello.
This is a live show, and that means that, as always, it's me,
Dan McCoy, with your patented solo ad read.
Sorry, if I've sounded a bit tinny,
I forgot to get the digital recorder we normally use back from our tech man mat
after this live show.
I have been doing this for 15 years now,
and I still make dumb mistakes, but I'm recording it on my laptop to bring you
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It could squarespace help me and I'd say,
yeah, sure, Elliot, and he'd say,
yeah, it's called, is it more of an time?
And it would just have a clock that would indicate
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flop. And before we get back to the show, you have a personal jumbo
tron. This message is for two from Emmy and two says, or wait, two, that's who's
for, Emmy says, you are one of the most incredible humans I have ever met.
Seeing you never fails to bring a smile to my face, I hope this message makes you as happy
as you've made me.
Happy birthday, babe.
I love you so much.
That is very, very, very sweet and a great note to return back
to the bellhouse for the rest of our live show
on Morbius.
Did you say something funny while it was gone?
So much, so much fun stuff.
Yeah, yeah, we covered up a couple of
of your own podcasts.
You'll hear when you listen to it.
Normally on the podcast is where we recommend a movie
that you should watch instead of Morbius.
And obviously when you go home tonight, should fire up fucking prey because it rules.
Yeah.
If you watch that shit, it's amazing.
No, I'm excited.
I love 10 Cloverfield lanes, so I'm excited.
If fucking rules, like I haven't seen the action movie in a while, they got me that, like,
fired up.
It's awesome.
Go see it.
If you like predators fighting bears and shit. So you normally we would
recommend stuff and read letters from listeners. But today we're in person. Hey, we don't
have to read letters from listeners. We can take questions from people, which are like,
how do we do that? Letters that we have removed the middle part. It's the original letters.
Questions in person. Yeah. There is a lot of letters talking.
There's a microphone right there.
Right there in front. There's a microphone.
Everybody. I don't know how much time we have.
I don't care how much time we have.
We're going to waste your time still.
We should try and keep it to 15 or 20 minutes.
But you heard it in 35 minutes.
All right, everybody.
Not that long.
So here, so before we have a, please line up,
you're doing a great job, everybody Before we please pay everybody, stop fighting.
No, no, no, put down that broken box.
Oh god, no, oh god.
There's a, so the, I'm going to say two things.
One very relevant, one not relevant to this.
Okay.
Actually, not relevant to them when you mention bringing it.
Okay, anyway, so the relevant thing, hey, everybody, we've all been at Q&A's.
We're someone's up there and they're like talking, and talk and talk, and but they're not really asking a question.
They're just trying to grab that moment where they can be a part of the show.
Just like in, you know, those things where you'd go to the mall and you'd take your picture
and then they put it in an adventure like they've used to be in your face on the hero,
and you'd be part of the show.
Anyway, we really appreciate that you're all here.
It really means a lot to us.
We know you're real excited about us,
which is wonderful.
Thank you.
We can feel it all the way from the stage.
But think to yourself this, if I was sitting in the audience,
and I was listening to someone say this,
and it wasn't me saying it, would I be interested in it?
And if the answer is no, please say something else.
Ha!
But that's to say that, to say not in insulting
or critical way because we're really excited
to be here.
So question away, it's more been time question wise.
I guess so.
Yeah, probably.
That's a very low microphone.
Yeah, there you go.
Yes, thank you.
And you should all be so amazed in my self-control that I'm not seeing the song right now because I want to hear your questions. Perfect. Perfect. Yeah, there you go. Yes, thank you.
And you should all be so amazed in my self-control that I'm not seeing the song right now
because I want to hear your questions.
Okay.
Later, I'll sing a song later.
Sing a song later.
No, it's question time.
I saw you.
Are you aware of the morbias meal at the look cinema?
Okay, you're going to have to define some terms in this question.
One, all cinemas are look cinemas.
It's a visual medium.
With an egg in the middle, it is a brand of cinema chain,
and they have meals for their character movies.
OK.
So the content of this is weird.
Yes, and they had a vampire sunrise, which
is a sunrise drink that I did not
when Noah's alcoholic vampire bites, which are pretzel
bites that they've named vampire bites.
Okay, so you don't really bite you, that's good.
No, absolutely not.
And cheesy garlic bread.
Which I know.
But garlic will kill a vampire.
I guess you could be themed from one end or the other.
I guess you could be themed from one end or the other. Like, I guess you're, you know. You know, if the monster squad is taught it's nothing.
It's that handy slice of garlic bread can be just the thing.
Yeah, for JoJo Rabbit, we've got our Hile hot dogs.
I don't know.
I don't know.
Looks like you don't understand the point of the movie.
Vampire is don't like garlic, is what I'm saying.
Yeah, all right.
I get it. It's bad for the. So so have you had this meal?
Yes. Okay and how was it? I was for my 19th birthday for our seventh showing of
Morbius. You've seen it. And that made fun of me. You think you're you think you're
because you're young you have all the time in the world. You don't. There's so many
better movies you can be watching. I know. Watch them now. No, no, this is part of the morbias, gentlemen's,
that is the TikTok craze, right?
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Everyone dresses up in a suit and goes to see morbias.
He's dressed in a top hat and tails,
and he goes to see morbias.
Yeah.
That was seven out of nine and a half.
Oh, god.
Oh, god.
Why the half?
Because I fell asleep.
So they, bam.
During morbias? Yes. Oh god why the half? Because I fell asleep. Okay. Bam.
During the morbias?
Yeah.
We're like,
Audrey also fell asleep during morbias earlier today.
Dan being a good husband took a picture of her and texted to me with a caption on it
and said more like snorby.
It's a true story. I have a short follow up question which is would you eat the morebias meal?
Yeah, it's just fucking well.
It sounds good.
It's a hustle bite.
Yeah, it's...
I'll eat almost anything.
Yeah, I'll mess things up.
Yeah, okay, good question.
Good question, thank you.
We all learned something today.
You know what?
The morebias you know.
Yes.
Hi there friends. Hello.
So I've got a pretty simple question, but I want you to all answer this individually in your heads before any of you answers that loud.
Wow, that's fucking rules.
I don't want you to buy us each other.
I didn't know Jigsaw was going to be coming up and just play a game.
What do you like to play a game, yeah, for sure?
Um, look, uh, if you touched ET, the extra terrestrial, would he feel wet or dry?
That's a very good question.
You know what, sir, you were right to make us, you're right to set the terms ahead of time.
Okay, do I have to write this down in the world?
I feel qualified.
I'm going to say, I don't see any shimmer on him.
I feel like he would be dry.
I feel like, in the words of the Simpson,
just talking about Hans Mollman,
it would be like kissing a peanut.
Certainly, when he's dying, he looks very dry and dusty.
He looks dryer there, for sure.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I would also think he would be fairly dry,
but I mean, you should stay away from ET's underside anyway,
but that might be a little wetter, yeah.
I mean,
I can already tell you what he is.
It's really struggling with.
He's got to like clean out his wrinkles.
That's gotta be right.
You got to clean him out or you'd see.
You damn, when we look for your temper,
it's funny, it's not.
Oh, I thought it was easy.
You said he'd take care of your ET,
that means clean out his wrinkles.
There's all sorts of chip from.
True.
When I asked you to adopt that ET,
you said that I'd be the one to clean up after.
Yep.
You got to take him home, all that stuff.
Yeah.
I'm just like both depending.
Alright.
I think that's fair.
Okay, and thank you for-
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Oh, I don't know.
I don't know if I can handle any more brain pluslers like that.
Follow that one up.
Oh, shit.
Uh, hi.
Andrew, last name withheld.
I wanted to take the opportunity to ask
the preeminent Topeka Focus Bad Movie Podcast.
All right.
As the native cans in myself, I'm wondering,
what is your favorite or least favorite part of Topeka?
I mean, I can say right now, my favorite part of Topeka
is the name.
That is a great, I love saying Topeka.
Yeah, so similar.
I've heard about a bodega there that's worth talking about.
But yeah, I've never been to Topeka.
I've only been able to vicariously enjoy or despise it
through the words of our listeners.
And I can't wait to, we've got to do a show and talk.
Yeah, my least favorite part, I guess,
is being unsure about whether we're being unfair. Yeah. I've never got to, we gotta do a show and do a show. Yeah, my least favorite part, I guess, is being unsure about whether we're being unfair.
Yeah.
I'm gonna go there for like a week
and then do a show that's all about to be good.
I think I got this one.
I think my favorite part is the mall.
I think I got this one.
And my least favorite part is school.
I think I got this one.
I think I got this one. I think I got this one. I think my favorite part is school. LAUGHTER
APPLAUSE
Oh, let it stewart, cutting the gordian knot like that.
Oh, amazing.
Yeah, he is the coolest of us.
Let's go.
Hey, how's it going?
Josh, last name with hell.
Hello.
Hello.
Thanks for coming.
So first, I just wanted to pile on the subway scene.
The train doesn't stop at the station.
It could be an express train, but you're right.
It's a good point that it doesn't seem
to be a functioning mass transit system.
It seems to be the MTA is operating only as a more
biased pushing system.
It's a fair point.
Fair criticism.
And then secondly, I totally forgot the question.
I was going to ask why the time I got up here so I'm just going to say you guys all
have great shoes on. Oh thank you. Thank you.
Thank you.
Hello. Hello. Zach lasting with held. Hello. So, Jared Leto was pretty amazing, right?
No, sure, yeah, naturally, yeah.
There's, there are times when I was like,
not sure he was on the screen.
He was, he was excluding so little energy, yeah.
And it's probably because he was so method.
So I was wondering what other movies could be improved
or made worse by somebody going so method.
I mean, almost all movies could be made worse by someone going method.
There's so many people just having things in movies.
Certainly be made worse for that person's co-workers.
Always.
Oh for sure.
That's like...
Unless...
Let's see.
I mean, human to repeat, obviously. Sir, you're just taunting the one iTunes repeater who was
disgusted by how often human sitter-peed was.
Hold on.
That's all we talk about.
That's how I sound.
Why would you put that in iTunes review?
I don't care how I was saying.
A method. Uh, method.
Well, the cats.
If they lift his cats.
They all roll their cats, right?
At all times.
Just a cat now.
Yeah, that'd be pretty great.
For all time, Dame Judy Dench, now a cat,
says that being a cat will not in any way
enjoy her with her future roles.
Oh, she, she, bequeath all of her riches to herself upon her death.
A local Yorkshire family was amazed to find out that the cat they had adopted was actually
famed actress Dame Judy Densch.
But first tipped them off that this wasn't a normal cat was the tattoo that said cat life on her tummy
Anyway, I don't really have an answer, but that's a good yeah, let's end it at that. Thank you
Hi, I'm Claire last name with hell say it you caught yourself real fast Oh, we did it. Mick last name with held
I
Previously wrote in to say thank you for the podcast
because it keeps me company when I'm hospitalized
and things like that.
And I thought it might be appropriate to ask if you have
any recommendations for comfort, sick day kind of movies.
My go-to comfort, sick day movie, for a long time has always been the last unicorn.
It's got the saddest soundtrack in the universe.
It's really.
Yeah, there's like, that's beautiful.
So, whistful for a...
I have a lot of...
You did it all the time, I'm a lot of...
A icy sun, cancer moon.
A deep well emotion. It's your moon, the deep oil of motion.
Yeah, it's sad because like, I don't know. I like,
Dan, look at yourself.
Dan's like, death wish.
I don't know, I just, I feel like,
I mean, Dan's really, it's would be like,
some kind of weird 70s Italian sci-fi porn, you know.
No, no, what I was thinking was like,
I realize as I grow older that I am becoming the thing that bothered me
when I was younger, I'm just like, oh, the people who
were young at this point are now dominating culture.
And everything is nostalgia looking back to their culture.
So I feel like shameful that the true thing is, yeah,
I want to regress to my childhood films,
like give me a slasher of the 80s
Or something that I saw in USA up all night even though I know all of the problematic elements of it now like
Like it just envelopes me in this nostalgia
But then I feel bad about it is what I was struggling with inside myself
And you know mental struggle is great for podcast
I was struggling with inside myself. And you know, Mendel's struggle is great for podcasting.
Yeah.
For me, it's that double feature
singing in the rain and wizard of Oz.
Love them both.
Fear joy on film, but they also made me cry at the end.
Beautiful.
Thank you.
I appreciate that.
And also, I have the discharge hospital bracelet.
You do.
OK, great.
OK, stick around.
Don't go anywhere.
That is to be signed later.
Yeah, yes. For the audience, you might be anywhere. Yeah. That is to be signed later.
Yeah, yes, it's my big abuse.
I'm collecting them so I can sneak into a hospital and kill nurses.
It's still blood because I'm a living vampire.
I'm a living vampire, so I need, but it's hard to get into hospitals these days.
And they can't find blood elsewhere, it's not like people are just walking around full of blood.
Wait a minute.
Hi, I'm Fleet. So first of all I just want to pitch for
Hinterlands thanks for the best for State Bar. Oh thank you. Thank you so much. I own a
little bar called Hinterlands. It's great. Come visit. Yeah. You won the Nobel Prize for a
beach tournament. I turned it down. Reject it brutally.
So I actually have a more biased question
that really confused me when I watched the movie,
and I'm wondering if you could fear that.
Okay, you could be, next one.
Yeah, I need, well, they set up that Matt Smith and Morbo
have the same power set.
Morb?
Yep.
How did the bats pick which one to support?
That's a good question.
You're right.
Just political views that breaks down.
I don't like that.
Along.
Because bats, unlike a lot of other, here's the thing I'm going to tell you, animals that
are awake during the day, like humans, are chaotic evil.
Now, animals that are awake at night, bats, possums, uh, some people, but not most of them,
are chaotic good, so they can just recognize the goodness.
Ironically, Jared Leto, as we said, probably not a great guy.
But in the movies, playing a good guy,
well, he's not that good a guy, you know what?
I think it's just because he's just friends with those,
maybe they're the bats from the tube,
and they just heard him and went down there.
I don't know.
Yeah, the bats were like, I know that guy, he's a good dude.
Yeah. He's the guy who cleans up all of our shit.
That's the guy that two bats were talking about.
Yeah, we'll help him out.
Hey.
My cousin was talking about you.
Look at this guy, he's morpious.
Bobby!
So I got to live with that pile of you.
Bobby!
Forget about it, come on!
Oh, I love these bats.
What do you think you guys see?
You go have some blood?
Should we give some blood to night?
Yeah, yeah, we're not.
Let's go to blood.
Yeah, sure, we're bats.
Yeah, okay.
Yeah, it's those days.
Thursday, blood night, get dressed up.
Yeah.
I hope that helps.
I don't know.
And you know, you know those bats are biting someone to go,
oh, best blood, you don't get blood like this in other cities.
Only in New York, best blood.
It's your blood!
You mean the blood on first avenue, that's the best blood, fuck you!
Blood on bleaker, come on!
Best blood.
Best blood in the city.
That means it's the best blood in the country, which means it's the best blood in the world.
Anyway, so.
Oh, yes, you have a question about New York Bats.
What if the New York Dolls were called the New York Bats,
that's...
Big extended, oh.
Hi, I'm Leo, last name withheld.
So in the past, you've covered the Nick Cagification
of John Kisak.
Tonight, you covered the Tommy Wazovification of Jared Leto.
So I'm going to know who is a weird actor
that you want to see become an even weird actor?
Mine would be Ryan Gosling becoming Steven's a go.
Oh, wow.
Yeah, that would be an interesting transformation.
Actress getting weirder.
I mean, I feel like Timothy Schalman
is on the Johnny Depp trail, right?
Sorry, Schalman, mom.
I'm gonna write it out of her now.
It's his name.
There's half the letters you don't even say. I feel like he is.
So he's boarding letters.
I feel like there's only enough time for that pale,
elfin little guy.
But only so much time before he becomes a real man.
I mean, I think Robert Pattinson is just on like a road
to get to the end of the game.
Yeah, I appreciate that.
Robert Pattinson is becoming just like,
you're all right, my idea of what David Cronenberg is.
I, yeah. I hold in my heart that local celebrity Michael Shannon can get
weirder. It's possible. I see him walking around the neighborhood, bag of beers
and mustache. You got a little more of the basement, Michael, you say?
That's something I miss about Roltham.
Walking around and seeing John Turro yelling at cars.
Thank you, thank you.
So, yeah, who's?
Yeah, I feel like there's room for a good, legitimately weird, new actors.
Yeah, who get real weird.
Okay, let's play the Craigslist ad.
For weird actors.
Must be weird.
Hello, I wanted to ask if you think
it's merely any better if the main character is Milo,
as someone who's misnamed, by someone named Michael Morbius,
and the Getch Revenge by having the best dance moves.
Oh, shit.
Yeah, I mean, Mansmith has so much more fun in this movie
than the character with more in his name.
Yeah, I think you've tapped into a much better version of the movie.
It is incredible that he's like, my name's Lucian, no it's not, it's Milo,
you're Milo now, Hero of the Movie, do what I say.
And Lucian is like a perfect vampney.
Yeah, it is.
It is supposed to be this moment of like showing like
how cynical this kid is at this young age that like,
oh, the two previous Milo's have already died.
Like, and I won't learn anyone's new name,
but it really sets off this hero on a sour note.
It makes it, yeah.
It just continues.
It makes me wish you had it.
Now there was a version of this movie that was not so more be normative, I'm going to call it, yeah. It just continues. It makes me wish you had it. Now there was a version in this movie that was not so more
be normative, I'm going to call it, where it's like,
and that was more of the like kind of like an
like an Oscar Wilde Decadent Phase type movie, which I guess
is in true with the vampire, to a certain extent, where it's like,
where it's like, yeah, let's be a vampire.
Let's just do bad stuff.
Like come on, we're vampires, you know?
Yeah, because it really, I mean, it's just degrees of living vampire.
Or like neither of that, like, both of them are murderers who drink blood.
Well, I feel like there's a, I've for a while, I've been tinkering with and I don't think
I'll do it yet. I feel like I've never seen a really, I've never seen a good movie about
capitalist vampires. Like, I haven't seen one yet that goes all the way. And it's like,
make that movie. Like, Hollywood, you're scared to go all the way
with your capitalist vampire movie.
Milo is clearly like, he's a rich guy in it.
But they never want to go all the way
to like a rich person who is praying on the underclass
or something like that.
So you look like society, but instead of faces
coming on a butt, it's vampires.
I mean society, I feel like society
doesn't really make that necessarily,
doesn't really say that message clearly.
It doesn't have a face coming out of a blind but still.
I mean, someone just yells society at one point.
That's the message, yeah.
But yeah, okay, yeah, it would be a better movie.
That goes that saying.
I'm taking control of this line.
It is hot in here.
I apologize to everyone that it is hot in here.
We will get through the line and then we will say goodnight.
But your question, please. night, but your question please.
Catherine, last name withheld. Hi guys. As a person from Kansas, I am certainly on the non-tapika train.
Okay, interesting. But I will chat about that with anyone else from Kansas here.
My question is as a group of people who have seen both death on the Nile and cats,
is as a group of people who have seen both death on the Nile and cats,
would you prefer to watch a film
that is a straight-laced murder mystery,
Aula, death on the Nile,
except for all the characters are the characters from cats,
or would you prefer to watch?
Well, no, it's for cavity.
Well, there's no mystery there.
Is these broken every human law?
Or would you prefer to watch a murder mystery
with human characters except it is in the style
of a musical review, Aalakats.
Oh.
You guys love musicals.
I have to say that you were describing the first option.
I'm like the second option, better be pretty fucking good.
For me to not go for the cat's murder mystery.
Nobody leave the room. Olderonomy has been murdered.
Yeah, for a second, you were describing Dan's next birthday party.
Guys, let's do a murder mystery birthday, but all of you please dress and lead turns.
What I love is that Dan is presenting it like he's
like asking everyone to do it.
But usually he sends an email that's like, OK, everybody
be here.
And you're wearing this.
And then you open the door, and he's wearing a mustache that
has whiskers.
He goes, oh, Dan, I'm a hook you'll perro.
Yeah, I'm yow.
I'll be investigating this meoward there tonight. I'm like I flew out from LA for this.
Now that's how I know what's a fantasy.
Well, if it was like a 50th birthday.
Yeah, sure.
Yeah, yeah.
Option A. I go with Option A. What do you think?
That's Option A.
I think they're both, I mean, if I, for this question, option A, but I do kind of like, I do
like the idea of A, if someone could pull off a musical murder mystery like that, where
it's just people introducing themselves in song.
I mean, that would be pretty amazing, but it would take, it would take someone of amazing
musical ability to do better than me.
Oh, you really dodged a song on that one, yeah.
Looking off into the sky.
I like to leave the audience with an anti-climax
at the end of every answer.
Hi guys, Sam, last name without.
So every year my wife and I watch in October
try to watch as many horror thriller or just
Halloween themed movies as possible.
Mm-hmm.
Focus, focus, etc.
Yeah, focus.
For October, yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm just scared stupid, yeah, yeah.
So are there any horror movies, horror thrillers or Halloween themed movies you guys can
recommend that aren't torture porn or rely on jump scares?
Uh, rely on jump scares. Uh, rely on jump scares.
My number one Halloween movie that I always recommend.
Uh, I don't, I wouldn't describe it as either.
There's things as night of the demons, the original.
It's great.
Uh, yep, thank you.
Give me at least one, Wu.
Um, yeah, I don't know.
It's like kind of the perfect like haunted house,
Halloween party that turns into a demon murder fest.
It's great.
I would go for that sort of thing.
There's some jumpscares in it,
but Trick or Treat, the Michael Dordin movie
that's like kind of an anthology movie,
but it's more like just different types of horror.
Intertwined on Halloween.
I think it's gonna say what cries and whispers.
Hello.
Well, everyone, I'm record person,
as the scariest movie I've ever seen.
But it's like, these two, and their identities are merging.
This is terrifying.
But if you haven't seen, you may have watched already.
If you haven't seen the original, the haunting,
the Robert Wise, the haunting.
It's an old movie, but it's very creepy scary.
And there's a scene where you're just looking at a wall,
basically.
And I was like, this is very scary right now. And there's a scene where you're just looking at a wall, basically. And I was like, this is very scary right now.
And there's nothing less jump-scare than a wall.
They can't move.
So that's what I was saying.
You could literally stare at one to calm down right now.
Yeah, yeah.
That's true.
Unless there's a scary face paint that I'm like, yeah.
Yeah.
Dan, would it calm you down to stare
at a wall with a scary face paint on it?
How cool is this face?
Okay, good question.
Next question please.
We'll talk with you later, because I painted a scary face in your wall.
Hi, I'm Winston, I lost name with Hild.
First I have to come up with a cape, because I actually use it as a, for vampire the mask
rage, the game that I run.
Cool! Thank you. It game that I run. Cool.
Thank you.
It's very good game.
Cool dude, learn everybody.
I want to ask you, what do you think Matthew Smith
has done to deserve this?
As a film career, it's not being great between this terminator,
and I'm sure he's been a lot of other bad feelings.
He was in last time, so which is not good,
but he's good in it.
I'm moving out like better than Stuart,
but yes, it's not widely below.
Yeah, he's not.
Post doctor, he's not had the greatest luck.
I don't know.
I mean, I don't know really much about him otherwise.
He's going to be a Targaryen suit, everybody.
Yeah, sometimes people just don't get the breaks.
Sometimes they're kind of thrust into that,
into the kind of...
Are you gonna ask me which targory he's gonna be?
No, not at all.
Sometimes, sometimes an actor knows...
Well, you need to, for your own good things.
Sometimes an actor, to no fault to their own,
gets thrust into what's called the heavy role,
where they're just kind of like the bad dude
that the hero has to either fight or get over or whatever.
But, um, and maybe he just loves making these movies.
He's like, I want to be in these movies that are like not that good and I'm like a bad guy
at home.
Oh, but he's English, so he's like, that's what I want to do.
Yeah, that's what it is.
And someone who came to the new Doctor Who episode starting with him as the Doctor New,
as the Doctor, uh, I do think that also in that role,
there's a lightness that like tempers a lot of,
he's got a weird vibe, which is good and engaging
in what makes him a good character for things.
But I think that the lightness that he brings in the doctor
is not something that's there when he's cast
to the villain all the time time and it's not serving him
Well, I don't know. Yeah, it looks like a bad guy so they're making a bad guy
But he's a lot more fun than that so yeah, it's a fun guy. Yeah
Yeah, this episode's gonna come out a day after something terrible
All right, all right, we're so close to the end. We're doing it.
Question left. What?
Oh.
Don't spragunt us.
Hi, my name's Peter and I was just wondering where you thought Milo got all his money.
Oh, I think it's because Otis died and left him all the cash.
I mean I did. Assume inherited it.
Somebody's Otis. I mean, I did assume he inherited it. It's somebody's own.
It's somebody's own.
It's somebody's own.
It's somebody's own.
It's somebody's own.
It's somebody's own.
It's somebody's own.
It's somebody's own.
It's somebody's own.
It's somebody's own.
It's somebody's own.
It's somebody's own.
I mean, because it's sad reality.
There's a lot of Milo's notices dying,
the making of that movie.
So, I didn't do it.
I didn't do it.
I said sad.
Yeah.
Look, I feel bad about the thing I made up.
Yeah. I wish. So,, yeah, where did my look?
I always assumed to be inherited it.
That he was a rich guy.
I assume Orbius has money, too.
The Jared Harris Hospital agrees does not come cheap.
But what do you guys think?
I kind of figured, oh, he's like this kind of weird kid
genius and maybe had a little seed money and invested well in like
gamble. Online poker or something. He's maybe he's one of those guys who he's
maybe all this time he is one because he certainly starts acting like a real
like a real show voting creep when he gets all blooded up. Maybe he's one of
these guys who like just look makes himself seem rich on Instagram and then
makes money off of that.
So he's always like, he'll like go to a place where there's a fuselage of a prop plane,
he'll take a picture of himself walking off of it
and be like, hmm, returning from Dubai or something like that.
And he hires a bunch of women to like lay in a bed with him
and takes a picture and it's like, Tuesday,
you know, this is all gonna pay off
when I become a vampire later.
Yeah. I just need to make it enough.
Well, that's the honestly, man.
He's been pretending to be a vampire all this time.
So when Morbius was like, I have a cure, he's like,
Oh God, I hope it turns me into a vampire.
I've been living a life for so long.
If it turns me into a van Helsing on full terms.
Oh.
Thank you.
And finally.
Hello. That. Hello.
What's good?
Last question.
What is God and is Dr. Michael Morbius God?
Ooh, what is God and is Dr. Michael Morbius a God?
Well, it's a good question.
Yeah.
The traditional.
I would argue he's a good question.
The traditional stalling tactic.
That's a good question.
Good question. Good question.
I mean, I just think...
I just imagine that, look, there are two Gothpillars in my mind.
Go on. On the one hand, I imagine Robert Smith up here,
above my left shoulder.
Yep.
And the other hand, I imagine death from the Sandman comments.
Look at the name similar to Morbius. And the other hand, I imagine death from the Sandman comics. I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to say that.
I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. I'm not going to say that. Morbius cares more though. Isn't Bernie being God like not Karen?
No, I don't know about that.
I think God's care a lot.
Yeah.
I think part of being God is carrying a painful amount.
Yeah.
It's why you literally put a barrier face pain
between you and the world.
This goes, yeah.
But yeah, I would say, I don't think he's a God.
I'll tell you what, I don't think so.
You know why? He didn't choose that lifestyle. He doesn't think he's a god. I'll tell you what I don't think so, you know why?
He didn't choose that lifestyle. He doesn't feel an affinity with it. He's just a bad like that
Like he's not just cuz he's like rockin' and I'm walking around in a hooded sweatshirt with the hood pulled down He's like, you know people it's society's based on a lie. I'm a bad and it's like
Bad I can see it. He never like he talk about his feelings, except for how he feels now
that he's a super hard body, right?
Yeah, and I feel like you don't usually...
How do you feel now that you're a super hard body, so...
Oh!
Oh!
Okay.
Oh!
Let's take a look at these thighs.
Can we...
Oh!
I know, I'm not...
No, I'm not.
I'm not going to go with the way Jane is objectifying Stewart right now.
It's one of the good way to end things on a high end.
So what are our votes?
You say, yes, God.
I say no, God.
Being a God is all around.
Let me say no, God.
Oh, not a God.
You heard it.
I got a report by a vote of two. No, God. Oh, not a God. You heard it.
I got off port by a boat of two.
And you know what?
Let's keep the energy going and say, that's the show!
Thanks for being here.
Thank you, Brooklyn.
I've been Dan McCoy.
I've been Stuart Wellington.
I've been Elliot Kailan not a god but god the Jason
As I was sorry about Jurassic Park
Just a little block for the dinosaurs. Oh
Yeah, they were
Priming next to DNA they brought them all back
Thank you it's a very easy song to pair with. Explain the plot to Jurassic Park.
Well, that's only the premise.
So there's this paleontologist.
Name Dalin Grant.
No. Doesn't much like kids.
He works with Daily Sad.
We'll save it for a many.
So...
So...