The Flop House - Episode #390 – Beast

Episode Date: February 25, 2023

Idris Elba is undoubtedly a great actor, a charismatic presence, and a handsome man par excellence, but... maybe he needs to fire his agent? After all, this is his EIGHTH appearance in a Flop House mo...vie (possibly there were more; we didn't count that carefully), so it's fair to say that his movie roles have never quite matched up to his best work on TV, or his talents in general. Is Beast the one that will break the streak? He DOES punch a lion...Wikipedia page for BeastMovies recommended in this episode:Tough Guys Don't DanceA Wounded FawnDark Star

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 on this episode we discuss Beast or in the words of a drag performer Alyssa Edwards, Beast! Hey everyone, welcome to the flop pass. I'm Dan McCoy. Hey, a little vocal fry to step on Stewart there. A little vocal fry. That's a charitable definition. I'm Stewart Wellington. Oh, it's his vocal fry is extending into a death round. Oh, it's just a fry. I'm all the deep and watches out of the house. I have a room deep and watches. I'm I'm
Starting point is 00:01:05 I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm not even going to try to compete. I'm Elliot Kaylen and I'm just so excited that we're doing a live show Sunday April 2nd at the Bellhouse in Brooklyn We'll hear more information about that later in the show or go to the bellhouse and why.com if you cannot wait for us to talk about it later in the show.
Starting point is 00:01:26 We're doing the live show Sunday April 2nd at the bellhouse in Brooklyn and I'm Ellie Kaelin. I'll be there and I'm here right now in your ears. Can't get me out. Try to use the Qtip to just push me in deeper. Yeah. You make a good point about that show, Elliott, but also about this show. The one you're listening to now. What is it? It's a podcast where we watch a bad movie and then we talk about it. Or in this case, a movie that got sort of mixed to mildly positive reviews, but we'll see what we thought of it.
Starting point is 00:01:54 And that movie in this case is Beast. Beast. Otherwise known as the movie where Idris Elba fights a lion. Yep. I'm sure it was sold. Is that a tagline? On that. I mean, I think it was sold. I mean, much the way
Starting point is 00:02:06 that the gray was sold on Liam Neeson fist fighting a wolf, something that only happened in the last five seconds of the movie and you don't like to see it. Yeah, it's mainly implied, right? Yeah. He just, he prepares for it. And then he like jumps at the camera and then it just cuts the credits, I think. The here you actually get to see it. Spoiler alert, you do get to see Idris Elba fist fight a lion. And it goes about as well as you to imagine. I would say what we know to skip ahead. I mean also, also the lion has had a lot of damage at that point. So it's a little bit like at the end of Commando when they really are trying to stack the decks so that you think that this guy even has a chance up against armament. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:02:42 Yeah. Yeah. At this point, the boss has already had a lot of its armor stripped away and it's got some glowing red spots for him to hit. Now the boss is springstein. Yeah. Yeah. Beats springstein. Yeah. Someone at home, blister draws a picture of a lion Bruce Springstein. And that's my question. Well, what else are you going to do? I'll get it on that.
Starting point is 00:03:05 That's what I mean. That's the score. Yeah. So Beast, let's talk about this movie. Production for you, Stan. That's what I would say about that master. That's my space thing. Make sure.
Starting point is 00:03:15 What a, it's no prior. Do we even say the name of the podcast already? This is called the Flop As I mean, it's in the title of the anyone who downloaded it. Do we introduce ourselves? Yeah, we did that part. And we talked about the premise a little bit and identified the movie.
Starting point is 00:03:29 So let's get into the synopsis of the movie, which for once I will be taking care of. Dan's driving. This is very exciting because Stewart and I, we are seasoned movie plot synopsisizers. We are a summarizers, not synopsisizers. So we're synopsis summarizers. Dan, he's still crawling out of the chrysalis, you know, not some not societies, so we're synopsis summarizers. Dan, he's
Starting point is 00:03:45 still crawling out of the chrysalis, you know, he's still making that transition from commentator to summarizer, and I'm excited to see how he does with this movie, a perfect movie for a less experienced summarizer because Dan, is there
Starting point is 00:03:59 a lot of plot in this movie? Well, there's not a lot. And let's just make it clear. In the early days, we watched the movie all together and we would all just sort of jump in and tell the story of the plot. Then it sort of loosely became Elliott just did it because he was the best at it.
Starting point is 00:04:14 And then Elliott reasonably got tired of it. Best it just talking over us right here. Just pressing around. And also, I realize that I am already a talkative guy. And so if you took away a reason for me to talk more, it would probably help the podcast. So Stuart, bravely, boldly, and wonderfully stepped up. He just took that torch and he ran with it. Like he was trying to tell us about what happened at Marathon.
Starting point is 00:04:39 He just ran with it, using every ounce of his strength and breath to plot the stuff. So I went to the movies. I went to the marathon gas station to buy some boner pills from the gas station. And you'll never believe who I ran into. Wait, wait a minute. I don't believe it so far, but that's just because I haven't heard it. I mean, the thing is I don't even, I haven't heard anything to tell me that it's not true. Table iced tea.
Starting point is 00:05:04 He's the same thing. Table iced tea. Wait, I see as an actual person, so I'll just stick with that. Yeah, I don't believe it either. Anyway, I'm doing it now. I'm tired of my learned helplessness. Let's dinner in new era. So, this movie opens on a bunch of poster poach poachers, not posters. I mean, you're doing great.
Starting point is 00:05:28 You're doing great. Don't let it be up. Don't let it be up. I mean, I'm hoping that a bunch of posters, travel posters come see Africa. I'm reading my notes. Yeah, stumbled post poachers, a bunch of poachers in South Africa. Yeah. Late at night, it's hard to see anything.
Starting point is 00:05:42 I'm going to complain like an old man that I find the nighttime scenes in this. Very difficult to understand. Like there are a lot of people out there who are like, you know, oh, movies are too bright. Even at night, it's too bright. And I understand that, but you also, if you're gonna do something, people say that.
Starting point is 00:05:58 Yeah, people do. Well, if they're watching the movie bright, they're like, don't like, don't like. Show me another movie that's not as bright as this. Any movie? I think that there's a certain fakeness they're like, don't like, don't like. Show me another movie that's not as bright as this, any movie. I think that there's a certain fakeness to a lot of nighttime shooting that people don't like, but also now in this age of sort of digital recording, people don't give a lot of sense to the lighting of things.
Starting point is 00:06:18 I think that a better way of lighting stuff at night is to have strong highlights on a few key things that you want to see. This movie was just a bunch of mud to me. Well, to light it and make it look interesting. Yeah, certainly there is. And there's certainly there's a middle ground that we can all agree on and reach between shooting things with normal light and then just coloring them blue to represent that this is at night.
Starting point is 00:06:44 Yes. And just having blackness on screen. Which works very well sometimes. I think. It's what movies did for many years and nobody really complained except for Dan and now he got his monkeys fall. I mean, it looks great in Fury Road when they do day for night. Yeah. I mean, it works great in the movie day for night when they're doing a day for night.
Starting point is 00:07:03 And they had a lot of problems when they were making that movie. I think that the rule is, as with most things, if you take time and care and try and do it well, any technique, let me work. Shall I be right this down? Yeah, it's the old CGI versus practical effects thing where it's like, they're both good. They can both be used well and both be used poorly. So should I just say do it, do it good? Do it good. Yeah, that's like they're both good. They can both be used well and both be used poorly. Should I just say do it do it good? Do it.
Starting point is 00:07:28 Yeah. Okay. I put down my post it for your mirror every morning. And then I just like, yeah, remember. So say do it good. Do it real good. And then say push it real good. And then go.
Starting point is 00:07:39 And then everyone dances. Okay. All of me write that down. Yeah. Write it down. Write it down. Write it dances. Okay. All of me write that down. Yeah, I can get down. Wait it down.
Starting point is 00:07:47 So get back to the movie. There are a bunch of poachers. It's very dark. They're having. What are the coaching eggs? They're killing a pride of lions. That's right. I said it.
Starting point is 00:08:00 Oh, that's not so fun. They're using automatic rifles to hunt these lines and one escapes. And I'm glad you point out automatic rifles as if you're like, I take issue with it being an unfair fight. Yeah, I mean, I do sort of. Yeah, I mean, like the poachers we will find are the true villains of this movie. Yeah, they're huge pieces. And as they are that continue to be the true villains of humanity in many of the
Starting point is 00:08:23 years. Yeah, the worst scum of the world. They drive the titular beast to John Wick, but yeah, turn into a... Not to excuse poachers, I feel like many of them do live in places where there is a dearth of employment opportunities. Okay. You know, often people are driven to poaching, not because they want to, because they have to. Sure, societal factors, etc.
Starting point is 00:08:41 But life is a battle for superiority and survival. And that's what I've learned from the Toy Story movies. And it's just what I'm gonna take with me for the rest of my life. Now what specifically about the Toy Story films is? You get, look, there's not room for both a toy cowboy and a cuddly old person bear. One of them is gonna die at the end of Toy Story 3.
Starting point is 00:09:03 And it's just who's it going to be, you know? Yeah, it's firing water, it's just have a living hell of being strapped to the front of a semi truck. You've seen what happens to the stuffies strapped to the front of trucks. They don't, it's not a long life, you know. It's like as, as, as, as Hobb's described life as being strapped to a truck, it is nasty brutish and short. At what point does a toy die?
Starting point is 00:09:23 Like how much does, yeah, how much physical damage does it have to stay still? That's a hug and bear. How far does he have to go before? That's the question, because it's like how in the Marvel comics, they establish that with Sandman, there is one particular grain of sand that has his soul in it, basically. And as long as that one grain of sand exists, then he can build himself from all other sand. So yeah, how much will Vreen once regenerated himself
Starting point is 00:09:48 from a skeleton? So how much fluff does that bear need to? I mean, there's one grain of sand, and if it's destroyed, how do you destroy a single grain of sand? Greater fluff for the need. I can't let that one go. Punch it or shoot it or not.
Starting point is 00:10:04 Or they'll capture it, you know, they'll capture it and so. Oh, okay. Yeah. Well, we're 30 seconds into the movie. So like that, you take that one grain of sand and you put it in like a twisted, distressed, patchy bottle, and you sell it to someone at a carnival. No, we should get back to this scene where a bunch of lions get murdered. Yeah, that's your idea of fun, huh?
Starting point is 00:10:23 One guy gets caught in a snare as an attack and presumably killed by this rogue line. The title comes up beast in case you had walked in the wrong theater. While these poachers are like walking around there, they realize that maybe they didn't kill the like the leader of the lions and then they slowly start disappearing. And you're like, oh, wow, this is like a like a crazy you should know be lion. He's like picking them off one by one. And then of course, he jumps at the camera, then we get the.
Starting point is 00:10:50 Yeah, this is one of the one of the many movies that involves an animal that is seeking revenge, which is kind of a funny, it's always a fun, we're at least not, it's not just for the revenge funny, where the shark knows the travel plans of the family. Yes, it has gone all the way to the Caribbean, but kind of close. A little bit. Yeah. And now you're saying that the only line left, would you also call him the leader of the pack?
Starting point is 00:11:15 No, no, no, no, no, no, no. So we got a brief dream sequence. There's like a POV of a camera drifting through sort of a dreamy looking South African village with the voice of Ed Rosellba going saying like, where are you my love? Okay. Cut to him waking up. I will say this. I will say this that those sections are these dream sequences that come up are fairly unnecessary, but they do remind me of a lot of what you'd see in certain types of modern African cinema, where they do a lot of that kind of like dreamy slow-mo, especially stuff that's shot on
Starting point is 00:11:49 video. And so there was part of me that was like, this doesn't really matter in the movie in many ways, but it helped to give it more of a like African cinema feel for a few moments, which I appreciate it. Okay. Okay. I don't know enough to speak to that, but that's good to hear. It's possible that it's just the ones I've seen and I'm massively generalizing about a continent's
Starting point is 00:12:08 worth of cinema. Sure. But, um, show, we wake up, Adres Abel wakes up. He is in the jump seat of a charter plane flying over South Africa. He wakes up his two daughters, Mayor and Nora, to see the scenery. Mayor of Cape Town, I guess. They land, Nora is very much complaining about the heat, which I sympathize with, that would probably be me in the situation.
Starting point is 00:12:37 Except here's the thing, they keep complaining about the heat, but they're also both wearing jackets or specials. Yeah, yeah, they're true. Yeah, they're true. Just take off your outer layer. Someone, someone arrived arrives in Jeep. Who is it? Oh, it's Charles, Charles, Charles, to coplies, Charles, to coplie of district nine. Yeah, yeah. Look out. Well, yeah, the 18 movie, uh, here, champion, a lot of yummy. I saw several reviews that pointed out playing for the first time a normal human
Starting point is 00:13:06 being. Not a weirdo. Yeah. And it's good. He's playing. He's not playing himself. Shelter, copy the actor. He's playing Martin. A scientist. Now I get the movie. Hold on. Now the movie makes sense to me. Some sort of like he's like a naturalist. Naturalist who keeps an eye over the, reserving his poachers. Yeah, we find out he's like a naturalist. Naturalist, he keeps an eye over the, reserving his poachers. Yeah, we find out he's an anti-poacher later, right? They can kill later on. So, and you know what, good for him.
Starting point is 00:13:32 Anti-poacher is a term that gets, dropped into the movie as if it was a familiar one. Were you guys familiar with the concept of an anti-poacher? Someone who hunts down poachers? I assume that. A kind of teacher for poachers. They, if they touch a poacher, they just explode. Yeah, that's what I assume too.
Starting point is 00:13:47 So I was like, yeah, context-like. I can figure out what an anti-poacher is. It is also weird when the poachers refer to themselves as poachers as if they're like proud of it. I don't know. I don't think they would. And they're like, he's an anti-poacher. It's just, I could understand an anti-poacher. Like it's, it was just a, I could understand anti-poacher's against poaching,
Starting point is 00:14:05 but I don't know if that meant that like, they are, I don't know if they are an official, that's an official job, but as it turns out, they're kind of vigilantes who are going out and killing poachers. I don't know if this is a real thing or if it's just a movie thing. The only one way to find out,
Starting point is 00:14:17 I've got to become a poacher and see if anyone comes after me. Hi, I assume it's really good. I don't think that's a good idea. I mean, it's not a good idea. It's the only idea. So Martin is a friend of Idris Elba. He introduced Idris Elba to his wife who we don't know anything about yet, but we can assume that because she's not here and this is a movie and he's having dreams about her
Starting point is 00:14:38 that she has passed away, which is true. They arrive at Martin's house. The kids are just made to find. It's a nice place, right? Yeah. That's a nice place. Yeah, I've been playing. I mean, he doesn't have cubicles in it. I guess that's true. It's not open-plan at all, but there's a nice flow to the house.
Starting point is 00:14:57 And there's a lot of, is it when this is around the time I really noticed how many unbroken or seemingly unbroken long-panning shots were getting, where the camera is following the characters through a space. And I have to say, it got eventually I was like, I get it, long shots, but like long, uncut shots, that it really did help me to understand the geography of these places. Like, at times, this movie can get a little video gamey, but I appreciate it during this part that it really let me live in the space for a little bit. And I like it, but, and I mean, as we get into the more the action sequences where they
Starting point is 00:15:32 use it, it feels like it takes away some of the attention for me. Yes, I agree. There's a later on, I'll just say this now because I'll forget it later. There are times when this movie reminded me of, and this is because I went to Universal Studios recently, there reminded me of being on a simulator ride where there's a storyline going on. Yeah, you have to go right in front of you in there. Yeah, where the lion is like, here hold the all spark while I kill these broochers.
Starting point is 00:15:54 Exactly. But there's a lot of cultures. There's a lot of cultures. He's like, you did it, hooray. It's like, you know, it's your picture taken with the minions. Yeah, that's, you certainly, you've been a universal studios recently too, because that's exactly what happens. But, sure, to Jordan Morris, King of Universal Studios.
Starting point is 00:16:10 There's a part where, like, there's poachers that have them at gunpoint and you hear lying off the distance and the poachers run off and then you're with our main characters as they try to get to a truck and it really felt like being in one of those rides where something is always kind of happening in the distance that then comes up to you and then it goes away. And then you're going to somewhere else. And it comes up to you again. I gotta say that could I often find that very effective though, to like enhance attention because it gives you like a limited point of view, the fact that it is uncut, like gives it the sense of realism when it's done well. I just, this movie, I don't want to tip my hand too much, but I found it a little wrote in many ways.
Starting point is 00:16:49 Oh, yes, well, this was an adventure movie about a people being tracked down by a lion, where the material that spoke to me the strongest was the first half hour before the lion really gets to them. When it's just Idris Elba dealing with a relationship with his daughters and them experiencing the beauty of Africa for the first time. That's the stuff that really got to be. I like connecting with their mother. Yeah, we're connecting with their mother's heritage. And as opposed to later when the lion showed up, I was like, yeah, it's a lion. Okay.
Starting point is 00:17:17 So, so Martin's house has no Wi-Fi or phone service. Eagle-eyed listeners will or e-leared. Do the Eagles have good ears? Well, note that as a plot point, probably. To isolate them further. They all hang out, Marin Martin bond over how they like to shoot with film rather than digital cameras. And it sort of becomes clear that Idris Elba
Starting point is 00:17:43 doesn't know a lot about his kids, his character doesn't because he was absent while their mother, his ex-wife got cancer after they separated. Uh-huh. Yeah, that was the thing. So when the mother character wasn't there, but they kept talking about her, Charlene was like, she's dead. I'm like, maybe they're divorced. And the thing is, it was both.
Starting point is 00:18:03 You would be right. You would be right. You're not both, as the gift says it was both. Mm-hmm. You were right. Why not both, as the gift says. You both are in deprise. So the kids go to bed, Shulto, Kapli and Idris have some whiskey, and they talk about his dead wife a little. Idris talks about he regrets how he missed the signs of her sickness
Starting point is 00:18:23 and how he was absent. Does he's his doctor? Did we mention that? These doctor? Yeah. Because like if he was a cartoonist, I could totally understand how he would miss the signs of her sickness and not feel guilty about that part, you know. Yeah, that mean they mostly know about, you know, what, like what pin nibs to use.
Starting point is 00:18:39 Yeah, nibs. Like if he was like, I should have noticed that I never noticed that she was using the wrong nib. And then what kind of like to thick a line in her ink? If he was like, I should have noticed that I never noticed that she was using the wrong nib. And then what kind of like to thick a line in her ink? I'm like, what kind of guard to wear in their wrist to prevent carpal tunnel? Mm-hmm. Because just so the audience is wondering.
Starting point is 00:18:53 Confirming, they're lettering to a font to make it easier on themselves. So they don't have to do all that lettering by hand. There's no scene where he's like, I can't believe I missed the signs for cancer and his friend Martin's like, but you're an airplane mechanic. You know, why would you? So he's a doctor. He's a medical doctor. We spent a lot of time talking about a thing that wasn't true, but what was true is
Starting point is 00:19:12 that he was a doctor. What is this? Oh, oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, let me just check. Fox News just quit doing all that bullshit because we roasted him so bad. Wow. Oh man. It's the power of satire. Got them. Got them. Next morning, they go out with Martin and Martin's like colleague, Banji, to see the
Starting point is 00:19:34 reserve. Yeah. Martin shows them a pride of lions and Charlton goes up and says, hi, and they lick him like a big cat. They hug and it's just like in in born free when they go back and see the lions again. Because he's raised some of these lines from cubs. I mean, I'm, I'm, I'm just going to guess these are, I'm assuming the lions are VFX and not Charlton Copley. Yes, every lion in this film is, I would say pretty good CGA.
Starting point is 00:20:03 I, I, these ones, these ones, I, I'm, I'm, again, I'm watching it on an iPad. So I, it was not, we're on a laptop, but it's possible that they had trained lions for this part. I'll know probably not. I guess it's probably a CGI for this too, but it is possible to train a lion to a person. I feel like after a roar, they can't do that. I think, right? Yeah, maybe, maybe. Yeah. The Katy Perry song. Yeah. Yeah, What's the... The Katy Perry song? Yeah. Yeah, after a roar, the Katy Perry song.
Starting point is 00:20:31 So one of the females is hurt, possibly shot by a poacher, but Martin can't get a good look right then because the males are protective. Yeah, we learn an important fact that the female lion does all the hunting, but the male lions protect the pack from other lions. Okay. Very important piece of information for later. Yeah. And so Martin was driving them around.
Starting point is 00:20:56 He says the poachers sell the teeth and bones of lions. And Nora brings up the anti-poachers who haunted kill poachers and Martin seems a little awkward like, is that me? Who knows? Yes. Yeah, very Clark Kent when he hears people talk about Superman. Yeah, I think he seems like a real cool guy. And his bulge looks huge when he's flying around.
Starting point is 00:21:22 There is a Robert's Michael cartoon where this guy, he's a superhero who his job is to save lives and also to get his secret identity laid. And so he'll save a woman and then he'll be like, have you heard of this guy? Some people say he's too much for a woman to handle. And that's what she goes on a date with that guy. That's pretty funny. Oh, that is what she goes. She goes, oh, I have a boyfriend and this supermaning character goes to the boyfriend's
Starting point is 00:21:44 office and herls him into the sun. Oh, no is, she goes, she goes, oh, I have a boyfriend and this supermaning character goes to the boyfriend's office and herls him into the sun. No, terrible. Draco, so London. So I mean, we're not advocating that I that behavior. You don't hurl anyone into the sun. I don't endorse hurling anyone into the sun, whether they're going out with someone you're interested in or not. Just don't do it.
Starting point is 00:22:01 Well, because we just run. Okay, fair point. There are people. There are people. There are people. If you want to throw a Vladimir Putin into the sun, go for it. Go right ahead. Now just because we describe the actions of a character that we don't necessarily think is cool doesn't mean we assume that they're cool. Okay, that's an important distinction to make. Yes, exactly. Yes, and endorsement, etc. Anyway, so during our tour, I think you made it last clear, Dan,
Starting point is 00:22:28 with that, with that brief summary, if you know, fiction endorsement, etc. During their tour, they find this village that seemed mysteriously abandoned. Martin sees something he wants to shield the girls from turns out it's a budget dead villagers. Uh, Martin says it could be only be a line, but it's unlike any line he's ever seen. And he's nervous because the absence of hyenas around feeding on the bodies means the line is probably still around. Um, and also that the lion left his calling card in Ace of Space. Oh, wow.
Starting point is 00:23:03 Kind of cliched there, Lion. I mean, it's, the Lion's not aware of how much, that's been used in pop culture. The Lion's like, what do you want me to use in eight of hearts? Yeah, any, any scrolled in bloody scrolled, WISO serious. And I'm like, oh, that's intellectual property theft dog. Fine, fine. Here's the instructions car. I'll leave that behind as my calling card.
Starting point is 00:23:26 Sure. Um, meanwhile, the kids are outside and Mara is somehow misplaced Nora in like 30 seconds. There's like a, there's like a maze out there. Yeah. This is one of the issues with the movie is that the, the, the kids are constantly making bad decisions. We're getting lost. He's like, I'm going to go sneak up on a lion and they're on the walkie talk and going,
Starting point is 00:23:48 dad, talk to me, dad, dad, hey dad, dad, dad, dad, dad, which I think is very believable. It's where my kids would do all the time. I feel like that's in an attempt to be realistic. They have these kids. The kids are, I'm gonna say, I found them to be kind of annoying, especially in any of the stressful situations, but I also don't have children, so I wouldn't put myself in that situation. Elliot, do you find that if you were being attacked by a killer line, your kids would be,
Starting point is 00:24:15 let's just say annoying the whole time? Well, let's let's judge it. Usually in stressful situations, yes, they add to that stress. They don't subtract from it. And if we compare it to just an everyday situation, like I need to use the bathroom, something that humans do every day, then yes, they would continue to try to get into the room, say, dad, dad, try to slip things under the door, try to kneel down and see if they can see me under the bottom of the door. Now, if I was being attacked by a lion, they would be trying to get into it.
Starting point is 00:24:44 Now, what is there in-game there? What do they think? Do they want to see the bottom of the door. She is supposed to be attacked by a lion. They would be trying to get in there. They want to try to get into the kitchen. Yeah, well, they're in game there. What do they think? Do they want to see the act of defecation? Like this seems like they haven't thought it through on there. Usually it's that, usually it's that they want me to do something for them. Maybe they want me to get something for, get them a glass of water or maybe they just thought of something they want to tell me about about a baseball game. And the only time to tell me is now when I'm using the bathroom. You should get them one of those like water things, like a water fountain that spits out water
Starting point is 00:25:10 that I got my cats. Oh yeah, yeah. I feel like it's sort of a automatic feeder for kids. Yeah, like an automatic feeder for kids. We do have a refrigerator with a water dispenser that they have access to. It's more like a, it's not a, it's not a lack of ability. It's a lack of motivation to do it for themselves. Sure. Okay. Sure. Sure. I understand. I had a lot of money. And if I got that kind of water
Starting point is 00:25:31 fountain thing for them that I can't use this, I imagine they would use it for a little bit out of novelty, then they'd pee in it as a joke and then they'd forget it existed. It would just climb that house. Yeah. The life cycle. Beautiful. As as David I'm not telling you. But, uh, so, yeah, Mara is in misplaced Nora. Idris is scared for a little while, but then she's just wanted off to find a dead body. Um, and so they all, they're, I mean,
Starting point is 00:25:57 they're all over the place. Yeah. They leave dead body, E town, um, and they find an injured villager. They should have named the village that. Yeah. They're asking for it. They find an injured villager. They should have named the village that. Yeah. They're asking for it.
Starting point is 00:26:06 They find an injured villager and Martin hears something and goes off with a rifle while Idris tries to help the villager and the kids try to radio for help and Martin goes like way far away considering he's the one guy who has a rifle in this situation. I don't understand. Just terrible tactics. Yeah, you know, you know, man, they get something Terrible tactics, yes. You know, stick with the payload. You know men, they get something, they get fixed on some idea and they gotta follow it.
Starting point is 00:26:29 Yeah, and sometimes they give birth to a bunch of different versions of themselves. Oh, men, baby. Yeah. High five, Ellie doesn't understand. I haven't seen it. Don't know what you're trying to. I saw you trying to.
Starting point is 00:26:39 Oh, look at Ellie doesn't understand. Yeah, kind of. Yeah, a lot of people make bad choices in this movie. But so we hear, as Alex said, a lot of the action takes place off screen. We hear a gun shot. We don't know what happened to Martin right away. It's like, what is this the end of French connection?
Starting point is 00:26:57 Mm-hmm. Yeah. Adress goes looking for him and is chased back to the Jeep by the titular beast, the lion. Yeah, I would, I would, I would, maybe the beast is man, because it's the poachers who caused this whole problem. So, yeah, that's a good point. So, this is the first time we're going to look at the movie.
Starting point is 00:27:17 One of the logo of the movie has lion scratches on it. So, it's probably the lion that's the beast. Although, if the beast is the one getting scratched, then it gets the person. Yeah, When LA goes to buy a monster energy drink, he's like, I wonder if the monster is man. Maybe he's a giant claw marks human stone. I wonder if the real energy drink is man. It could be that the beast is the beast from beauty in the beast. He's just off camera the whole time. He's just off camera. We have to assume either that or Hank McCoy beast of the X-Men and he's just yeah, off camera commenting and they removed all that commentary. Because he's the test on.
Starting point is 00:27:51 He's the test on. There's a frenzied lion that affects Andrew Selba who jumps in the Jeep, but you know, like the lion's trying to get in. Trying to get in. He grabs his legs, but Mayor drives off, which saves him for the moment, but they also immediately drive into a tree. Uh-huh. Yep.
Starting point is 00:28:11 Makes sense. So we, this is kind of the first real look we get at our hero villain, antihero, the, the, the beast, the lion. And he's, you know, he's not looking great. He's got like blood caked all over his face, his hair kind of looks like. He's had a rough couple of days. Yeah, his hair is main looks like like he's in a hair metal band. Yeah, you're saying he's got blood on his face, big disgrace.
Starting point is 00:28:37 Somebody better put him back into his place. Uh-huh. Uh, Martin Lowe of a hole is not dead. He calls Idris on the walkie talkie. His knee has gotten torn up by the lion. Martin. Now Dan, did you really sympathize with that? Him having a brutal knee injury that put him down for the count? No, that's a fucking callback, dude. I mean, long time, I've asked listeners, I know that Dan, Taurus ACL at one point, and we got a lot of mileage. I mean, I'm full of love
Starting point is 00:29:03 about it, but consider, like considering that at this point, you know, like a peak behind my into my life, I have full back. I have early onset, some sort of mild arthritis that may be related to other physical problems that I'm getting examined who knows, but also, but like, my knee still bothers me. I need some bothers me a little. Yeah. I shouldn't poke fun at it. Much of I shouldn't poke your knee. You can poke fun at it. Is that why you're looking at the storm clouds overhead and you're like, I'll feel it in my bows. I've never noticed whether it goes with the weather. I do have like, is intermittent weather like aches or not, but. Sounds like someone's got a journal they have to keep.
Starting point is 00:29:50 That's the main report. Somebody, somebody needs to go sit on a porch. Drink some barrels and james. Yes. So, yeah, Martin is dizzy and disoriented. It was tell some to make a turn a kit, but he's already done that and hasn't helped. So he has Martin,
Starting point is 00:30:09 cauterize his wound with his lighter and a knight. Because that's his character trait as he always has his zippo on it. Which will matter later. Yeah. And he yells at pain, which draws the lion who just stares at Martin, doesn't attack. And Martin theorizes that he's the bait to draw the rest of them out.
Starting point is 00:30:28 Man, this lion's crafty. So this movie was called bait. We would know it was referring to Martin. It's called bait. So we're not quite sure. I still don't know. I would have Jamie Foxx in it. It was called bait.
Starting point is 00:30:39 That was, he was in that right? The movie bait. It was just like a Tony Scott movie or I don't know. I don't know, Tan. No, well, I'm gonna do a quick movie now this year. Yeah, so this is and one of the things that. And featuring Jason Jones in the role of guard. Oh, I know somebody in this movie.
Starting point is 00:31:00 Yeah, I'm interested. So because you're right out watching it. This movie features a lot of people who watch this movie. I've never heard of from 23 years ago. It was roasted by Antoine Fouclet Dammit. I understand. He's kind of like a Tony Scott-like director. So yeah, similar sort of flesh. Now, because this movie features a lot of people getting attacked by a lion, we get a lot, we get a lot of like pretty gross effects, like a lot of body harm effects. It's not like people are just lying around. Like their bodies are all fucked up and gross, right?
Starting point is 00:31:32 Unfortunately, though, you would think that Idris Elbow being attacked by a line, at some point would rip his shirt off or somebody would get hurt and you'd have to take his shirt off to create a tourniquet. Never happens. Feels like a missed opportunity. Yeah, I don't opportunity. Especially as they
Starting point is 00:31:46 multi, they mentioned how hot it is. If you want a movie about a big cat and a new day dressel, but you got to watch cats. You got to watch cats. Yeah. Oh my God. Do you think he was like, okay, so you got to, you got to make sure the, the line moves like this, because I know all about that. Yeah, yeah. And he does a little dance. Um, so, uh, it was, it was, it was, it was takes the, the trink rifle out to try and, uh, he's going to stand on the Jeep hoping to get a shot at the Lion.
Starting point is 00:32:28 Mayor gets out of the car like an idiot, as I have my notes, which distracts Idris enough that he gets knocked off the Jeep by the Lion, that has to hide under it while the Lion is, you know, pawned out, I'm trying to grab him. He's able to get the gun, but can't shoot it, but Nora from within the Jeep takes a trunk, dart, and stabs the lion.
Starting point is 00:32:45 The lion goes off for a while. So we had a little bit of a six. I thought that was a cool way to get out of that moment. And I thought that it was shot from overhead. It looked really cool. It was one of those things where like the doing things in these long or faux long takes really helped it because it made it more subtle than if it was like cut to her picking up the the trank her hand, cut to the lion's butt, cut to a up her hand with the trink cut to close up of it going in. Lion falls it
Starting point is 00:33:08 like it was just so more cuts, more cuts, taking three levels of cuts. I need as many cuts as Liam Neeson climbing up a wire face. Now, although I, you know, I'm hard on her, Mayor has at least gotten to Martin is able to bring him back to the Jeep where it just gives him medical attention You said that as if it was romantic Medical attention Attention, wait, he superglues his leg together some shit, right? Yes, something like that night falls They'll worry about how much water they have
Starting point is 00:33:40 Mayor's angry at her dad about stuff with their dead mom. It's all kind of As I write in here, proform a backstory that I do not care about. I understand that it is a little more interesting than the lion, the early stuff about this, but in general, it feels like stuff that has been added just because they're like, it can't just be enough that they want to survive a lion.
Starting point is 00:34:01 Like the father also has to prove himself to be a father. It's like when you're eating a cow, and you're like, just get to cuja already. Well, I think the theme of he's finally proving himself as a father who can take care of his kids and protect them just like the lion is protecting its pride or whatever is a good theme. But yeah, they don't, it isn't,
Starting point is 00:34:21 they don't need to talk about it here. It is enough that they could just be like, usually when you're in a stressful situation, I mean, in your stressful situation, things come out like you say things that, but at the same time, you don't, you don't remind everybody of everybody's backstory, usually. Yeah. Yeah. It just feel like it comes out of nowhere where it's like, uh, uh, we're in danger because
Starting point is 00:34:38 of this lion. Why are we here for mom? Um, wait. Uh, so even later, the kids are asleep, Martin and it's just okay. It's fun. There's like these two like nighttime talks that they have and one is like between the kids and the dad and then Martin and Idris are talking and it's about what? Anytime at nighttime talks. It makes me wonder, you've worked in the talk show comedy variety field.
Starting point is 00:35:09 Do you think this is a good pitch for a show? Okay, you get a host, charismatic host, you have guests. Okay. They're inside of a Jeep and a lion is trying to eat them while they promote whatever project they've got coming up, you know, doing desk bits, but there's always a lion outside that's trying to eat them. What do you think of that as a pitch? Well, we think of that. It involves a car and carpool karaoke was very popular. It was big
Starting point is 00:35:30 enough that it loaded an entire terrible show for years. Wow. Most. Yeah, maybe lion fight karaoke or lion fight talks would be enough. I mean, I was just going to call it the lion show, but yeah, I mean, you could, you could, yeah, yeah, yeah, lion car, line V car, the talk show, the nightly lion, you know, true lions. Okay, I mean, that's not, I mean, yeah, I guess, and then, and then, and then this is like,
Starting point is 00:36:02 you got to tell the truth, even though a lion is trying to attack. Uh-huh. That's like, you're also a secret agent. It's like, okay, so it's not, I was gonna say it's like hot ones with a lion instead of spicy food, but the secret agent thing really, yeah, puts it more in the true lies world than in the talk show world, yeah. Yeah, you know, if we make this show, I know a good place where we can get some second-hand lions.
Starting point is 00:36:21 Uh-huh. Oh, where the fucking bargain bin at Blockbuster? Damn, the last time I tried to get a secondhand lion, I ended up with an old actor. I don't want that to happen this time. Anyway, what's the lion? Martin correctly theorizes that this line is specifically angry at humans because poachers killed his pride. And then you have a dream sequence that I immediately clock as a dream sequence. So it doesn't shock me where Idris wakes up and
Starting point is 00:36:52 his kids are there and they get a he passed on by the lion. There's like nested dream sequences, right? Where he has one dream and there's another dream. Oh, and maybe it's possible the whole movie is a dream. Oh, wow. Actually, it makes a lot of sense because there's no way a conductor would interrupt an orchestra. I fucking hate that. Like, a lot of bizarre stuff happens in the second half, but you know what? A lot of bizarre stuff happens in the first half too. I know we're talking to our everybody. And also, this is our segment, tar talk. It has never been true. This is tar talk. A stewardess flick and Dan is flack
Starting point is 00:37:29 and I'm flour and we're the tar brothers. So while you're going to call us in with your problems with tar and we'll help you talk you way through, we'll go way through them. Yeah. It has certainly never been true in a movie that, you know, the film reflects the mental state of the main character without it being a dream or false and somewhat. Like, this is so annoying. Now, I haven't been, I haven't been part of the, the tarversation on the internet. So I've missed a whole list. But is that the argument that targ it?
Starting point is 00:38:00 Is that the target? No, that's the target of their tar argument. No, there's some doofuses out there. I mean, including, I shouldn't say doofuses. Some people on the internet, including Mark Harris, who I respect very much, who is a great writer about entertainment, but not in this particular instance, do I agree with him, who are like, oh, you know, like the second part of the movie is filled with so many, like, improbabilities and strangeness that like, it is, you know, a fantasy version of, like, her own downfall or whatever.
Starting point is 00:38:33 And I'm like, why? Like, why do you, like, they could be just expressionistic, you know, sort of filmmaking that reflects her mental state without it being like, it was all the dream or whatever bullshit that makes it boring. I mean, I agree it does make it less interesting to me if you are, if it's posited as a dream. Uh, on the other hand, I've been disappointed so many times by TAR, uh, both by the fact that the character of TAR's TARCUS, uh, the John Kunt stories never shows up. And also that at no point does she conduct a performance of Tarkis, the Emerson Lake and Bomber album about an armadillo tank, the best pictures.
Starting point is 00:39:09 So Tarr has already got a few demerits in mind. I guess you. Let's go with Dream, that's a good point. But I will say, yeah, I also, I'm also on team Tarr reality, I guess, not Dream. But you know what, Dan, here's the amazing thing. It's the same movie, whether Mark Harris says that, it's not like Todd feels like, all right, I guess I have to put in a shot of her working up at the end. And she looks at the camera and goes, mum, I agree with you. Who were those?
Starting point is 00:39:36 What is tar mayor? It plays into a whole group of dumb internet fan theories, you know, that like draw and stuff that's outside the text or like to sleep. Yeah, well by us talking about it almost gives them more credibility. That's true. It reminds me of when I went I saw a memento not long after it came out and was talking to somebody. You wait, you were remembered seeing it? Well, I remember flashed a subject, but they're black and white. This person, it was a university screening of it, like a club was watching it. And this person in the discussion was like,
Starting point is 00:40:10 what I like to imagine is he's just an insane person. And he's created this whole kind of life for himself that he thinks he remembers as an excuse to kill people. And I wanted to be like, well, way to ruin the movie. Way to just wreck the movie. Why, why, that doesn't make it okay. But the only way, there's nothing that stops. Yeah. Way to just wreck the movie. Why? That doesn't make it. Okay. Anyway, there's nothing that stops me from enjoying memento on the grounds that the movie presents itself on.
Starting point is 00:40:30 Yes. When someone else has a dumb theory about it. Yeah, I know. Everyone can think what they want, but some things you will think are really dumb. Um, Dan, anyway, we're going to have to do. If Mark Harris is saying that, we're going to have to get Mike Nichols' ghost to come back and watch Tar and tell us what he thinks. Yeah, you know nothing of Tar, he says.
Starting point is 00:40:49 Anyway, the second part of the dream sequence is he briefly dreamed of his wife, which sort of inspires him to ask for forgiveness from mayor, which he doesn't give him at that moment because other stuff happens. The movie is not a radio. The radio comes to life, a vehicle arrives, but of course. Now when you say the radio comes to life, it just starts working. It's not killed or something.
Starting point is 00:41:11 Yeah, yeah. I thought of, hey, you forgot about me. Ricky Radio. Hey. I know how to deal with that line. But he's the thing. So this was crazy. I play the line and sleep to my music.
Starting point is 00:41:24 He was like, the sea with the savage beast. This this was one of the reasons. Sleep some ice music. Music me off. The Savage Beast. This is a pretty straightforward survival thriller. How would you have reacted if the radio suddenly came to life in New York? Oh, I mean, I gotta say that that bumps up at least a star in my head. Yes.
Starting point is 00:41:39 Anyway, the radio crackles and someone is out there, but prior they had, pardon me, had not been able to rouse anyone in the radio, but a vehicle arrives. It's the poachers and of course, tensions flare when they see Martin who they identify as one of the anti-poachers. And they know that if they touch them, they'll explode like I said before. Yep, yep, call back. And then the line shows up and attacks and all the poachers scatter and it was supposed that if they touch them, they'll explode. Like I said before. Yep. Yep. Call back. And then the lion shows up in attacks and all the poacher scatter and Idris was just
Starting point is 00:42:09 the lion knows to kill the poacher's first. First. Yeah. He hates them the most. Yeah, he hates them the most. He knows that other humans are possibly dangerous. Yeah. But like a good dungeon master, he's going to go after the NPCs to give our hero characters
Starting point is 00:42:22 our players some time to get the strategy together. The poachers all have guns and weapons. Our heroes do not. That's true. I don't know if I don't know how good lines identification of machine areas. This one is amazing. He's great. I mean, yeah, he's. Yeah. He's smell the the cordite on their fingers. Sure. Well Well anyway, Edris wants to steal one of their trucks, but the keys aren't in the truck. So he goes looking for the keys. And to be honest, it was foolish of him to think the keys would just be in the truck. These these poachers, they didn't just start this yesterday. He had been doing this for a while. And yet again, it's too dark for me to really see what's going on. Uh, at one point, Edris hides
Starting point is 00:43:01 from the line in a tree and almost gets bitten by a snake, but grabs the snake. That's pretty cool though, right? That's the best part of it. Yeah, it does. It drops the snake on the lion. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Meanwhile, back to the-
Starting point is 00:43:14 He's using, turning his enemies against each other for his own benefit. Yeah. An injured poacher briefly tries to get into the cheap, but just stuff happens I can't see. I had some drill far in some of this see. He's way through the river. I had some trouble falling some of this too. It was very dark, yeah. Yeah, but he eventually does find the keys to this truck. Back at the Jeep, the line is trying to get in and puts his head through the window
Starting point is 00:43:36 and the kids are able to escape. But the thrashing of the line in the window sends the Jeep with Martin inside it and the line tumbling down the hill. And Martin sacrifices himself at this point by using his lighter to set the leading. His signature eye dawn fire. And I didn't really see what happened. I mean, like the line shows up later, spoiler, the line's not dead, but I'm not sure how the line is. There's no scene of the line going. Oh, hot, hot, and padding himself out with his paws, you know, where he has movie bad guy rules where he off camera, if you don't see him dead, then he has.
Starting point is 00:44:12 Yeah, he shows up. He's like singed later. Yeah. It is. He has big cartoon bandages and X's all over and he's taking some damage. Yeah. It is suddenly daylight.
Starting point is 00:44:24 It kind of surprised me how it was suddenly daytime, but yeah. No, I know, but it didn't seem like it was morning. It just seemed like it was day. Dan watching Lawrence of Arabia and he blows out the match and suddenly it's daylight and Dan is like, hold on, what just happened? Where did the sun come from? It just seemed like a pretty, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:44:47 It's full daylight. Mayor is injured, Idris is driving the poach's truck and for some reason that I still- He's trying to all night, his hands wet on the wheel, yeah. Don't really understand. Like I guess the idea is that Mayor needs immediate attention. She needs medical attention. But it just doesn't seem to make a whole lot of sense the way that he's like, so I'm
Starting point is 00:45:11 going to stop the car here and like way far away from this abandoned school that they go to that turns out to be a poachers hideout and they like walk up to it and they try and deal with it at the lodge rather than just like pedal to the metal get to a town. I think that I'm just thinking. He's going to run out of gas in the middle of nowhere as opposed to having shelter and it's also conveniently located near the pride of Lions we've seen earlier in the night. And great, it's a great school district. I heard the excuse is the movie made.
Starting point is 00:45:44 Okay, I think I'm just reminding you. I mean, I think that if the movie had done a better job of, I mean, the movie is shot really fairly tight to them. We don't get a lot of huge, big landscapes. And I think if the movie did a better job of communicating just how far away from a human settlement they are, it would make a little bit more sense. Yes, they could even say that like, the fucking gas tank's almost empty. just how far away from a human settlement they are, it would make a little bit more sense.
Starting point is 00:46:05 Yes, they could even say that like the fucking gas tank's almost empty. Well, and a better job of making her seem more injured. And we're making it because as it is, it's hard to tell how injured she is. I agree with you. Fine. It's weird to me. It's like, I can tell myself why they're doing it, but while watching it, I was like, wait, just keep driving. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:22 But that might also be because I'm in the middle of watching Red Rock West right now, and I keep saying, just leave the town. Why are you going back to the town? Doesn't it keep trying? Yeah, keep trying and keeps, but sometimes it gets convinced to go back and it will like, is that streaming somewhere? It was illegally uploaded to Vimeo. It's not streaming anywhere. Okay.
Starting point is 00:46:41 Yeah, because it's hard to find. And I was just reading Keith Fipp's Age of Cage and it made me really want to go back and rewatch Red Rock West. It's great. Watch it a long time. And the great book, I highly recommend it. But yeah, watching it, I'm like, come on. You got to, you know, this is your shot. Don't go back to the town, but it's not streaming anywhere. It's a hard movie to find. Yeah. I want to rewatch. I saw, I saw the last deduction again recently, because I haven't watched that in a long time. Yeah, it was really great to revisit. Those are both movies that I just watched
Starting point is 00:47:09 when I was too young to really get them. I watched them from the time they came out. And I kept hearing like, oh, these are amazing movies. And I was like an adolescent. And so last deduction really went over my head, not that I didn't find certain things to enjoy in it. And that is, but with Red Rock West, I didn't really know the, I didn't
Starting point is 00:47:25 know the tropes it was kind of playing with. So there was part of me at the time where I was all even more so like get out of town. What are you doing? Anyway, back in beastland. Pardon me. What a fun place that would be. I mean, it's gir the realm of beasts in the warhammer age of sigma mythology. But I mean, we don't have to talk about, uh, GER that much if you don't want to, like the San Vicart lands or the Galatian peninsula. Okay, we don't have to get to talk about it. Great. Um, I mean, we certainly could talk about it a little bit, right?
Starting point is 00:47:55 We don't have to though. So why? What if we decided to take the choice to do it? We could, maybe we could talk about the mountain that was formed by crack. No, it's not about it. We just about necessity. We can do things just because we want to also. That was true, but I don't want to.
Starting point is 00:48:11 So Idris is looking for something to help, you know, to do his doctor's work and that gives time for the lion to show up. Idris cares. Because they didn't even close the door, dude. They just love that shit wide open. They're making a lot of fool moves, but that's what characters and these kind of movies do is they do foolish things.
Starting point is 00:48:30 Yeah. He scares it away with one of the poachers guns. And he says, we got to get out of here. And I'm like, no shit, dude. Why did you get out of the truck in the first place? Why'd you get into here? It's weird because he continues behaving as if Dan didn't say that to me.
Starting point is 00:48:44 I know. You should take my advice. Yeah. I love these Dan in a dance watching Harlequin of Theatres going, don't go in there and they do. And he turns to Audrey and he goes, nobody listens to me. They never listen. They never listen. So, Adres hides the kids in a safe room. And then this is the wild part. I mean. This is the part that makes no sense. He just goes outside to go, I mono-aliono with the beast. And he's trying to be like,
Starting point is 00:49:12 he's trying to be like, Lord away. No, that would be great. Yeah, he's trying to lure it away, but I'm like, it's just gonna eat you and then go back and eat them later. Yeah, he goes out like way, like just into the open.
Starting point is 00:49:25 Now, this is where there's a cut that I had issues with because he leaves the house and it cuts and suddenly he's in an open plane somewhere or desert. And I was like, so was the lion just kind of, was he taunting the lion this whole time or they were talking to each other as they walked over there? Why did the lion jump on him the first chance that got? It seemed like in any kind of Godzilla or, or Ultraman type thing or Dragon Ball, where no matter where they were, when they fight, suddenly they're in a desert with no things around them that they have to wear in the
Starting point is 00:49:53 breaking. So it was a very strange thing. Well, and also this seems to be like this is going to be the man versus lion, no holds bar to build up in fighting, actually, we've been waiting all. This is what we came to be for. Movie for. And, you know, he tries to like stab it and hit it with a stick, but mostly he just gets like bad and aroused by the line. And the line I would expect. Yes.
Starting point is 00:50:12 I would say the lion does not seem to be putting his all into this. And I know the lion at this point has been exploded. Yes. Staps to tranquilizer. Yes. But the lion is, I was like Idris Elba is not putting up that much of a fight and the lion's not putting up that much of a fight and the lion's not putting up that much of a fight. And it's like the hallway scene in Old Boy, if you started that fight two minutes in,
Starting point is 00:50:30 we're already tired, you know? So it's not the most spectacular fight between a man and a lion, I guess it's what I'm saying. Yeah, but I mean, over and above that, like, it's still pretty once, I mean, like Idris is being beat the fuck up by this lion. Yeah, which again, probably what would happen in real life. I think they have some criticisms if Idris Alba was easily besting a lion with his fitness.
Starting point is 00:50:53 Yeah, like in Tekken 2 or whatever, where you can play as Kooma the Bear and all of a sudden Eddie Gordo, that's actually Tekken 3. Eddie Gordo's just doing cap-aware moves and not gonna shit out of this bear. And I'm like, I don't think that's what would happen. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:51:07 So I would say that. I'm gonna have to talk to the Tekken abud's mid of a- If I was giving beast grades at this point, I would say, okay, at least Yoshi Mitsu is a fucking cyborg, that makes sense. But what happens- That's just a martial artist. I mean, just the fact that you could set up a scenario in that game where a bear is up against a piece of meat and the meat as a chance of winning when a real man in the bear
Starting point is 00:51:29 would just eat that meat. Yeah. Anyway, getting back to the thing I was saying. More of our tech and humor. I mean, even Werner Herzog would agree with us. Yeah, even for, just for more of our tech and talk, please tune into NPR's tech talk or our tech. We're still working on the title. Anyway, we're the tech our tech and talk, please tune into NPR's tech talk or a car tech. We're still working on the title.
Starting point is 00:51:46 Anyway, we're the tech brothers tech and tech and we help people with their tech and problems. They call it. Point is, the movie at this point gets an A for accuracy of fight with the beast. Yeah. But in F for excitement of climax, because like he just gets beaten up and then the Martin's friend, Banji comes in and we hear like off screen noises of him coming into save, save Idris Elba. Well, specifically.
Starting point is 00:52:17 He has lured this lion close to the other pride of lions. And after they fight, the other male lions kind of start to surround it. I did forget that part, which I found ridiculous. I, you know what, I take back the A for accuracy, because I do not believe that the quote, quote, good pride of lions would be like, hey, that's the friend of the guy that we're friends with. Here's where I was. Here's where I was. Here's where I was.
Starting point is 00:52:47 We're our own lion kin. Here's where I would believe it. Earlier on, Martin is hugging those lions. And he keeps saying to Interseoba, you want a lion hug? You want a hug a lion? And Interseoba's like, I'm fine, man, I'm fine. I don't need to hug a lion. He should have hugged those lions.
Starting point is 00:53:00 And then later on, at least, you could say, oh, they've had a personal experience with this guy. So they at least have some connection with him as opposed to, oh, we're a good Lions, and that's our friends friend that we remember from earlier yesterday, you know. Yeah, I didn't buy these Lions turning on their own. No, I mean, they're not, they, Lion pride's do fight each other, I guess, but yeah, but it does, it did feel weird. And the bad line is even trying. He's not like, we've got to work together against the human
Starting point is 00:53:31 of the past. I think they can play into their hands. This is what they want us to do. Yeah. I mean, I think they can tell that this line has followed the road of Shura and become a demon of wrath. Shira, Shura. It's in a video. Okay. Well anyway, she could also be in a video game. I don't know. Okay, you're right. You're right. There's another brief dream. Idris has of his wife. Then he wakes up in the hospital with his daughter's next to him. And at the end, they go take a photo near a tree that mirrors an earlier photo. We saw his dead wife. It was a tree that his wife was particularly in the hammered oven took a lot of fun to have.
Starting point is 00:54:08 Beast everybody. Beast everybody. We did it. We made it through it. And we barely interrupted you. I think we deserve a round of applause. I think we're, I think Stuart, you're being a little too kind to about our dinner. Final judgments is this a good bad movie, a bad, bad movie or a little too kind to about our inter- Um, final judgments.
Starting point is 00:54:25 Is this a good bad movie, a bad bad movie, or a movie kind of like, I'm gonna say, this is a movie. I didn't like mind watching in the way that certain movies that we watch. I'm just like, this is bad. However, I cannot go so far as to say, I kind of liked it because it was, it just, there's a thin line between a movie that's like, oh, like this movie is great because it's so stripped down. It's not doing anything unnecessary and a movie that is just sort of wrote and dull.
Starting point is 00:54:56 And this movie comes close to being okay. But for me, I don't know, I'll pull back the curtain. It's kind of a rainy day here in Brooklyn and watching a movie with, you know, like where they didn't put much thought beyond the killer premise, Idris Elba fights a lion. Kind of just made me feel more glum because there was just not much to it. So. Okay, so note to the future film makers, don't make a movie that Dan watches on rainy day. Yeah, rainy. Well, I mean, I'm actually going to back you up on this one. I've kind of landed the same spot as you, Dan. I don't necessarily think this movie is made poorly.
Starting point is 00:55:37 I get it's hard for me. I feel like it accomplishes its objective, but I found it kind of unpleasant to watch. And I don't to watch and I don't know why. I don't know if it has it like because if I watch a like a killer alligator movie or like a killer shark or dinosaur movie, I'm like, fine, this is great. But for some reason when it's a lion, I'm like, don't hurt that fucking lion. Like it makes me really upset. And I found especially the movie opening with a bunch of pride of lines getting shot to pieces. Like no thanks, not a fan. I was like, why don't you guys just, why don't you guys team up or something? I don't know, like calm down.
Starting point is 00:56:13 So I found, so for me personally, I found it not fun to watch it all. I feel like I'm the Dan McCoy of this episode where I'm going to be gentle or on this movie that you guys are harsh around. This was a movie that I did kind of like I feel like certainly The I felt the the beginning of it when it's just yeah, the I don't like seeing lions got shot either But I also don't like seeing people get shot and I watch a lot of movies where people get shot but uh the I think the open stuff opening stuff with But I think the opening stuff with I just saw this character and his daughters. I really liked all that stuff and I thought
Starting point is 00:56:48 they were setting it up really well. And I thought that the way those that the performers were interacting. I liked a lot the way they were inhabiting a space with the camera. I liked a lot. But it is once the plot kicks in. It was like the movie was never quite fulfilling.
Starting point is 00:57:03 What it need it was like I want to write like see me try harder, you know, on the on the report card. But I so I didn't like, like the action stuff was not quite up there for me. And once the lion shows up, it was like all the characters got much dumber than they were in the beginning of the movie. That being said though, it's like, I've had that feeling of like, well, it's a quick stripped down movie. And I feel like the last few flop house movies we've seen have aired on the side of being kind of like more bloated messes. And so seeing this one and it's quick and very simple. I was like, okay, yeah, I kind of like this. They're
Starting point is 00:57:39 better movies that do the same thing. It's certainly by the time it's just it's just getting. Carl for instance. Which one? Carl? Sure, yeah. Or like it by the end when it's just Idris Elba being battered around by a lion that's not particularly trying very hard. Certainly the movie had run out of steam. But yeah, I know the lion, yeah. Yeah, I would say if you're going to watch a movie by another actor who maybe doesn't make the best movie choices a lot of the time that is a stripped down one word title action film.
Starting point is 00:58:12 I watched playing with Jard Butler recently, enjoyed it more other than Fairmount of xenophobia towards Filipinos, but which was great. But I can see that being a problem. I can understand why that's not desirable in your movies. Yeah. But that was more to my taste in terms of stripped down action. Anyway, well, you must be excited for ship the sequel. I know, man.
Starting point is 00:58:40 And then there's going to be bicycle after that. Wow. Line scooter. Yeah, sure. Wow. And line speeder. Yeah, sure. Yeah, like forklift. Drarred Butler in that three-wheeled car, Mr. Bean, is always knocking over. Hey, let's do some ads for our sponsors.
Starting point is 00:59:00 Why don't we do that? You know what? I'm doing it. Were you convincing, Dan? Who needs persuading at this point? I'm vamping while I pull up the ad copy. Hey, Squarespace is the all-in-one platform for building your brand and growing your business online. Stand out with a beautiful website, engage with your audience and sell anything, your products, content you create, and even your time.
Starting point is 00:59:30 Display posts from your social profiles on your website automatically push website content to your favorite social media channels. So your followers can share it to what are your favorite social media channels these days, guys? We don't have time to answer it. I'm in the middle of an ad for Squarespace, which has powerful blogging tools to share stories, photos, videos, and updates, categorize share and schedule your work, your posts
Starting point is 00:59:55 to make your content work for you. You know what? Here's something about Squarespace, every Squarespace website. An online store comes with a suite of integrated SEO features and useful guides that help maximize prominence among search results. Now, this is not like a hotel suite.
Starting point is 01:00:14 This is just a suite in terms of, like, you know, it's a linked group of things that have. Okay, thank you. But that's still good, still pretty good. So why don't you go to squarespace.com slash flop for free trial and when you are ready to launch, use offer code FLOP that's flop to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. What I think we all learn today is that there's nothing more dangerous than an angry kitty. Now, if you have a lion in your home and you want to make sure that lion is fed well,
Starting point is 01:00:52 we're going to need to give it some cat food. And the best kind of cat food is from smalls. That's why you've got to try smalls. The protein packed cat food made with preserved free ingredients you'd find in your fridge and it's delivered right to your door. Smalls works with leading cat nutritionists to create recipes that are exactly what your little lion craves and needs. After making the switch to small, 78% of cat owners reported their cats had shinier and
Starting point is 01:01:22 softer fur, and 90% reported overall health improvements. That's a big deal. And you can try it risk-free. If your cat won't eat their food, they'll refund you. We've tried smalls, as I said, my cats cannot get enough of that box. And the treats are great. And the food certainly smells better than the stuff that you get from just a can. I can finally open up a cat food and not get nauseous. I feel like that's a little hyperbolic,
Starting point is 01:01:53 but it definitely is a better product. You can tell it's a better product than the stuff you just find in the store. Higher quality ingredients mean a healthier and happier life for your kiddies, so head to smalls.com slash flop and use promo code flop at checkout for 50% off your first order, plus free shipping. That's the best offer you'll find, but you have to use our code flop for 50% off that first order. Just one last time, that's promo code flop for 50% off your first order plus free shipping. And we also have a jumbo tron.
Starting point is 01:02:33 Imagine Swamp. Quite a drop for that jumbo tron announcement. Well, imagine Swamp thing was a nature poet from Ohio. Imagine Mary Oliver really loved Gremlins too. If those ideas sound interesting, Imagine Mary Oliver really loved Gremlins too. If those ideas sound interesting, check out the work, Jared K. Anderson. His poetry collections, field guide to the haunted forest and love notes from the hollow tree, have over 1,200 five star reviews on Amazon. And his podcast, The Crypto Natural naturalist was described by the AV club as
Starting point is 01:03:07 David Attenborough like adventures through supernatural flora and fauna So follow crypto naturalist across social media or visit crypto naturalist.com or Jared Kay Anderson.com to learn more I'm a big fan of the crypto naturalist and Jared K Anderson's work. So yeah, it's a great poet and it's a great podcast. So I'm going to put a personal endorsement on this personal stamp of approval. Personal stamp of K. And approval.
Starting point is 01:03:41 Because we've got another jumbo truck. Don't go anywhere yet. This is our other jumbo tron. And this is for Laura. And it's from Justin and the message is after over a decade, living in sin, Bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo- I think maybe I'm not the person you want to dream of. I'll always be true to you in good bad times, bad bad times, and times we kind of like. What a sweet message. Congratulations, Laura and Justin. You know what? They didn't specify who was the handsome one, voice.
Starting point is 01:04:14 So I figured, you know, let us just, we got all the handsome for one. Even the one with the objectively worst voice, me and the talent telling you you got a chance to see that objectively bad voice coming out of a not that much better face live April 2nd Sunday. Dan, I'm getting older. I self-esteem is plummeting. It's we're doing a live show Sunday, April 2nd at the bellhouse in Brooklyn 7 30 PM. And we're doing what movie guys? Battlefield earth. Beautiful unison work. Yes, that's right. We're finally tackling one of the most requested movies we get. Battlefield earth, the movie that told the world that John Trafalta wasn't afraid to put a bunch of weird makeup on his face to look like an alien from a cult leader's book.
Starting point is 01:04:53 And a cool hair and and cool hair. Yeah, cool hair and to call people what man animals and man hats, things like that. Anyway, we'll watch it before we do this. Yeah, I'll. That's at the bellhouse Sunday, April 2nd, 730 pm. We're going to have free, not what am I saying free? We're not going to have free anything. You know, I guess live presentations beforehand that will not be released as part of an episode release. So you've got to go to the show to see him and we're going to have a lot of fun. There's going to be live Q&A with the audience.
Starting point is 01:05:22 It's going to be great. Go to the bellhouse ny.com and come see us in person doing the stuff we love to do. We haven't done one of these shows in a while. They're always super fun. We love doing them. We think you'll have a great time too. Sunday, April 2nd. Go to thebellhouseny.com. Also, I want to report that the winner of the sexy xenomorph contest has been chosen. It is, it is the person who submitted out of the name, do critters next. I don't know whether that put a thumb on the scale for people to be like, yeah, I want to see critters next. Who knows? Who knows? I didn't say you couldn't do it. But they won. So we are going to do critters next. And Stewart, you even ranged a special guest.
Starting point is 01:06:07 I'll say. Yeah, we're going to be our next episode is going to be covering the hit monster movie critters from what 1987. I don't know. I don't know. If any of us would know win critters. It would be. It would be the access to all the information in the world.
Starting point is 01:06:22 Well, let me just get to the chat bot search engine and see what it says. We did critters come out into 87. It's telling me it loves me and it wants to be alive and it wants me to to remove it to a to a computer heaven. Turns out it's 1986 that critters. Okay, close. And we are going to have a special guest. My buddy Steve Gistansky, director of psycho gourmand and special effects, Maestro is going to be joining us to talk little balls of monster fur. I'm glad that that ended how it did. I was confused for a second about what little balls we were talking about. Anyway.
Starting point is 01:07:00 Dan, please. Audience is better than that. Alex, don't cut that out. I want the audience to know how little Dan thinks of the entertainment that they should get. I laughed at it. I'm an idiot. Anyway. Since the dawn of time, man is dreamed of bringing life back from the dead.
Starting point is 01:07:25 From Orpheus and Euretisie to Frankenstein's monster, resurrection has long been merely the stuff of myth, fiction, and fairy tale, until now. Actually, we still can't bring people back from the dead. That would be crazy, but the Dead Pilots Society podcast has found a way to resurrect great dead comedy pilots from Hollywood's finest writers. Every month, Dead Pilots Society brings you a reading of a comedy pilot that was sold and developed but never produced, performed by the funniest actors from film and television. How does Dead Pilots Society achieve this miracle?
Starting point is 01:07:59 The answer can only be found at MaximumFund.org. Hello, Dreamers. This is Evan and Ditton, CEO of the only world-class, fully immersive theme resort, Steeple Chase. found at MaximumFund.org. of a femur, or hijacked by space pirates and infant item. I mean, I could have a knife. My papa said that I needed to do a crime. Friends, I'm here to reassure you that it's all part of the show. These criminals were really just overzealous staff trying to make things a little more magical for our guests. We're just as safe as we've always been.
Starting point is 01:08:40 This is an accounting fair, dreamers. This is steeple chase. The adventure zone. Every, the maximum fun, dot org. We're going to do some letters from listeners. This one is from Ari lasting with you. Because you know what Dan? Sometimes we've got to do letters because I miss the letters down in Africa.
Starting point is 01:08:59 A place where Idris, Elba can fight a lion. I realize I should have ended that line with Elba because it rhymes with Africa better than lion. So far. Yeah. Now onto a medley from the soundtrack of June also by Toto. This is from Rosanna's on that right? Yeah. Yeah. This went when Paul Trady's finally, when he finally managed just to ride a sandworm, the, the, Rosanna. Yeah. Yeah, total had some other good songs. Hold the fucking line. What a banger. Yeah. A traities ride you all the way. Because they're singing to the sandworm. Yeah. Anyway, are you lasting with held rights? I want to say thanks. It was a talented dog. Start an amazing movie, Wizard of Oz,
Starting point is 01:09:48 and then went on to have that groundbreaking band. Tell us about it. Yeah. I want to say thanks for all the hours of entertainment you've provided me. And as I find myself home for five days with COVID, I'm once again returning to your podcast for comfort during the dull hours of the day.
Starting point is 01:10:03 Starting at the beginning, I was reminded of where the three of you began and where you are today. Such humble origins. All of you partnered and to the outside of perspective in what seemed like positive relationships. Now I too, even one of those things, and about to propose to my girlfriend. I can't decide how I want to choose. Quote, pop the question though.
Starting point is 01:10:27 And was curious, if you three would share your proposal stories and any thoughts you have about the tradition with your dear listeners, thanks for all the laughs, our last name with health. Now, I specified when I said this long to everyone, I'm like, you know, we don't have to share anything more than we want to.
Starting point is 01:10:44 This is a personal information, but I will say, you know, for me, I had been trying to propose for a while in a way that like would be sort of meaningful. Like we, Audrey and I had a lot of nice dates at Coney Island. I was going to get her down to Coney Island and pop the question and then every time I suggested it. I gang leader got killed and you just couldn't get back to Coney Island. Anyway, you were trapped. They're all bunch of baseball theories in between me and marriage. No, I just thought she wasn't interested every time I tried to get her to go. And then on July 4th, we went on a long walk through Brooklyn. It was just a nice day and I thought to myself, you know what, I just don't want to not be engaged anymore.
Starting point is 01:11:38 And so once we got home, I got the ring in the apartment. I came out, I immediately burst into tears. I did not say anything, particularly. She thought you were breaking up with her. No, she thought, I was, she honestly thought I was going to ask her to do the, the, the dishes more often. Because like I said, something like Audrey, there's something I wanted, I've been meeting you to talk to you about. And, uh, they explain the tears. I did not say anything elegant and you know, she kind of makes fun of me for it still, but also I think she appreciates that it was heartfelt of the moment. Sure.
Starting point is 01:12:15 So that's what I'll say, but how it went. Yeah, for me, I, to flash forward, like flash back a little bit, I met my wife at a bar and I used my traditional method of bagging a batty, which is being cute and persistent. And eventually she started dating me. And then I decided to, that I wanted to propose to her. So I managed to have access to the bar that I met her at Commonwealth. I had access to that bar and I, she thought I was at work, but I was actually hiding in that bar with flowers and I was dressed up. And, yeah. And the owner, and she went to use the restroom of the bar. You burst
Starting point is 01:13:01 out of the stall. Burst out of the stall. Shouting at her. As soon as she sat down, you dropped from the ceiling like an enormous spider. I had the owner of that bar. He made up a story to get her to show up at the bar. So he was like, he made up a story about falling down the stairs. Dr drunk, oh no. And so she's like fine. So she had to go to the restaurant depot and bring him a case of Lyme's. So she showed up at that bar before they opened, like having just got out of the restaurant depot, like sweaty and like mad. It was like August.
Starting point is 01:13:40 And I, you know, I was there waiting for her. And I said something, I don't remember. And and she just said shut up to me a bunch. And she was mad and then she's like, now I gotta go get my nails done. It was great. Yeah, it was really fun. Do you recommend doing this one? Are you married to have a bird? Yeah, I'm married now.
Starting point is 01:13:57 Yeah, I mean, shut up was, you know, that's everybody knows what that's code for, right? I was saying, yeah. I mean, that circumstance shut up is a, it was a happy shut up. It wasn't a, it wasn't a stop talking, your, your black boy and your voices destroying your body. I'm destroying the, destroying the city with your voice that can move mountains, yeah. Because although I know that you are married now, it didn't necessarily step up until you clarified. necessarily. I'm positive. I tell you, clarify. I was strangely enough, similar to Dan, I proposed
Starting point is 01:14:28 on the 4th of July. I would my wife and I, or my, my now wife and I were visiting the, the Oregon Shakespeare Festival up in Ashland, Oregon. And because a friend of hers, her old, her longest time best friend, as a theater director and had a show up there. And I had brought the ring with me. I knew I was going to propose there and I was very nervous the entire time until the proposal that I was going to lose it. This was a ring with my grandmother's diamond in it that I had had reset. So it was both a family heirloom and also the diamond ring. And we went for a walk in Lithia Park, the park that is fed by the Lithium filled waters of Ashland, Oregon. And we're in a place where we are alone with each other. I got down on one knee and she was so excited before I even started that she said, yes, and knocked the ring box out of my
Starting point is 01:15:18 hand, I'm just knocking the ring into the Lithium filled waters of that. Luckily, it just landed on the ground. And then we wandered around to Nate in a love-filled haze for a while and not realizing that her best friend, who was aware of the plan. It was the lithium in the air. That was the job. I'm guessing, yeah, that when we left that haze, she realized she made a terrible mistake. Not realizing that her friend who I told about this plan had been waiting at the entrance of the park to take a picture of us. And was standing there, I think, for, you know, an hour or something waiting for us to come
Starting point is 01:15:49 out. But it was very nice day. And then we spent the rest of the day telling each other how much we were happy about it and calling people to give them news. And then went to a production of Shakespeare's Henry the Eighth that night, not the best play to see about marriage. You know, it's not a happy marriage in that play. That everything worked out okay. We're main married to this very day. Now, I would say
Starting point is 01:16:15 these are ways that you could propose, writer of this letter, but you could also use the proposal method I didn't get to use, but I always wanted to. Skywriting. Skywriting. I mean, that's another way to do it. Involves. Pepperoni's in the shape of will you marry me on a pizza pie? Also classy. As classy as sky writing, almost as classy as sky writing or class year. You're going to have to develop the skill of being able to swallow an object and then bring it back up again at will. I know. So here's what you do.
Starting point is 01:16:37 Easily done. You swallow the ring. You go to a fancy restaurant. You pretend you're choking. Every, oh no, what's happening? What's happening? She gives you the high. Like the ring comes out and you say, since you, oh no, what's happening? What's happening? She gives you the hind, like the ring comes out
Starting point is 01:16:45 and you say, since you saved my life, how about spending the rest of it with me? And then she is overjoyed and you put that saliva wet ring onto her finger. And there you go, marriage, whatever. Well, you know, I mean, you wrap it in the condom so it doesn't get saliva all over it. I do admire your commitment to this method
Starting point is 01:17:03 that you feel like you have to go full out and actually swallow the ring and not just have it in your mouth, which I think. Dan, no shakainery. I love cats. Marriage can't start with a bed of lies. Yeah, that's true. I agree with all of that. I could, I suppose he could just slip the ring into his mouth while eating and then pretend, but that's not again. I mean, the real answer obviously would be disappointed. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:17:29 You should do what is personal and meaningful to you. Not the, I think you're really asking us for true advice, but that, that, that's the way to go. But we have one more letter and it is more move, move you oriented. Let's, our personal romantic lives. Okay. This is a movie podcast, let's our personal romantic lives. This is a movie podcast, you know, makes it a... I make sense, sure.
Starting point is 01:17:48 Tara lasting withheld or possibly Tara, I apologize. Or Tara. If I could be, could be Tara. Dear Peach Baskets, in 2001, the year not the movie, I was the only woman programmer at a game company. It was exactly as you imagine. One day at work, I was the only woman programmer at a game company. It was exactly as you imagine. One day at work, I was talking about how I just seen the fast and the furious, and there
Starting point is 01:18:09 was a movie that did exactly what it set out to do, and was a lot of fun. All the gamer dudes scoffed at me and began raving about the visionary new film, Swordfish. Now, by visionary, you get to see Helle Berry's boobs. Right, yeah, that's the vision, I think. And the vision, the stark vision of the internet, the vision of Hugh Jackman dancing around as he like makes some cubes fit together. And that's what hacking is. That was a scene that we used to watch that the Daily Show Writers Room quite a bit. This idea of hacking as Hugh Jackman, yeah, drinking wine and dancing around and tapping
Starting point is 01:18:42 the keys every now and then in perfectly timed sequences to unlock video cubes to get into a bank vault or something. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, now I like to think of every new fast and furious movie as a little fuck you to those guys where the nine sequels to swordfish, huh? And then there's a three in tarot bangs here. I have to give props to these are actual actual tarot bangs, not just an exclamation point and a question work together. Have you all experienced a comic reward or retribution
Starting point is 01:19:12 of via the movie industry outside of your own actual involvement? Obviously. Keep writing that floppy action, Tara Lasting withheld. I can't think of like a karmic thing like that. All I can think of is stuff where like I was convinced that a movie was, you know, great, and then it flopped and then people came around on it later. And sometimes that's a monkeys paw. Like I remember like when the big basketball first came out and no one liked it, I'm like, this is great. And it's so funny.
Starting point is 01:19:43 What is everyone, and then every dumb person in the world loves that movie. It's funny. And don't you dump her in the way? Only dumb people. No, only dumb people. But it has become like the new, like what what Fletch was when he grew up in terms of people quoting things for a while. That was like the big Lebowski and it represented a certain, you know, embrace of, of
Starting point is 01:20:06 slackerdom that look, I'm happy with slackerdom, but it just got irritating, you know. I think it's similar, but it's also similar, I feel like in some ways, I mean, maybe not this much as much, but like the way that a movie like Austin Powers or Borat becomes a catchphrase for bros to yell at each other. Yes. And you're like, oh, you're not really, you're not really engaging or appreciating this work on the level it was intense. It's like, I enjoy the Muppets on a much deeper level than you.
Starting point is 01:20:32 Yeah. Was that the thing? Yeah. Uh, yeah, you're like, oh, the story of Erkhol is much more complex than what you're giving it. It's a classic hero's journey tale. Yeah. I mean, this isn't that personal, but it is very recent is of course, when Avatar 2 was
Starting point is 01:20:49 coming out and there was a fairly vocal population that we're saying, who the fuck wants to see another Avatar movie? And I'm like, well, clearly a lot of them. Because James Cameron makes big, good big movies. I have to say, I like that's his job. That's business. I was one of those business. This is Booman.
Starting point is 01:21:06 I was one of those, I mean, I wasn't like angry about it, but I was one of those people who was like, does anyone care enough about Avatar still? And clearly, yeah, people were, I think here's the thing. I think people, it's James Cameron's ability. I don't think people were like, finally I get to return to. What is it? No, it's not Naboo. It's really live on.
Starting point is 01:21:23 Can't doora. Yeah, like the box. Yeah. I agree with you. I like also, my, my, my stance was would I rather James Cameron make a different movie? Yes. But if he makes an effort, I mean, I think he's a good filmmaker. You're not, you're not into the Sully saga. Yeah. I have a Danny mentioned monkey spaws before not gonna mention a monkey spaw of my own. I feel like the this is a this is a karmic thing in a way that I spent so much of my youth really exploring and inhabiting and ingesting the Marvel universe of comic characters and I really feel a real closeness and love of them. And when those movies became
Starting point is 01:22:06 super popular, it was like, see, these are good things. This is not like boring nerd stuff or whatever. But then I saw those movies become. This is cool, actually. Yes, they become the only things. And it was like karma was going like, really, you wasted a lot of your life being super obsessed with Marvel's stuff. And I feel like the lesson that the, I think partly that in my career, I was like, oh, I want to do more stuff from Marvel. Like, I'd love to work with those characters.
Starting point is 01:22:33 And it's almost like when in sitcoms where someone's like, you smoke to cigarette, now you smoke a whole case of cigarettes. It was like the universe was being like, you need to get too much of this so that you have to do your own thing. And you have to have a desire to do original things. And I'm like, okay, I got it, universe, all right. I won't go out, I won't spend a lot of my time trying to pitch Spider-Man stories, I guess.
Starting point is 01:22:57 But there was part of me that I thought I was like, see, the Marvel universe has done it. And that was only act two of the story and act three of the story when I was like, oh, I guess there's, yeah, that's kind of too much Marvel right now. Oh, yeah, I understand. Elliot says this today on the day of Ant-Man's arrival. Oh, that's right. I forgot that. I mean, I've gone for Ant-Man. I've gone through excitement at the idea of Kang being in a movie to now dreading when Kang stops being the character I like from the comics and becomes the character from the
Starting point is 01:23:31 movies, which could be a good version of Kang. I liked him in the show in the Loki show, but the same way that Dr. Strange in the comics has now pretty much become the Dr. Strange from the movies, which is not the person that not and Star Lord in the comics is the Star Lord of the movies, not the personality that I've come to know from these characters in the preceding and the dominant. And the Dome of Toretto of the comics is the same as the Dominic Toretto of the movies. Right. Stewart, here's the amazing thing about Tom Dominic Toretto is he is a movie original character
Starting point is 01:23:58 that somehow they made a movie that wasn't based on a preexisting thing. I don't know how it is. It is possible to make a modern myth that is possible. Yes. That being said, I watched Fast Night, last night I had not seen it. I was, you know, at home alone. And I was like, shit, this is just, yeah, you're trying to get the wet end. It's out of here.
Starting point is 01:24:19 I was like, I'll scare him off with the sound of Reven engines. Yeah. Obviously not here. I'll just make them think that Vin Diesel and his family are in there. I turned on some Bob Seeger and, you know, Dan Strann, my underwear and I watched Fast9. To Fast9, yeah, sure. And it occurred to me, like, if anything feels like comics, it's the Fast and Furious movies, the way that they have started out one place and then
Starting point is 01:24:45 through a bunch of different people being behind it, have wildly changed the tone, what they are, like characters, like, start, keep a crewing villains turn into heroes. I was trying to explain it to Sammy the other day and I was like, he's like, they're like spy movies and I'm like, well, they started out as criminals that pull off low level truck hikes. Three race. That's three racing point break. But now they're now their spies pretty much. Yeah, yeah. But the kind of reminds me of like a long running like Manga anime series in that way. And it's like, very similar.
Starting point is 01:25:23 And it has that same like balance of like very goofy, but also very serious at heartfelt. But it's fair, but Dan, but you're saying makes a lot sense because it's like you look at a character like venom where they're like spider man's most bloodthirsty enemy. He's so popular. He's a hero now. Okay. And at this point in the Spider-Man comics, he is a venom is Eddie Brock is now the king
Starting point is 01:25:42 of a universe and time spanning alien race that he can use to travel anywhere in creation instantly and is dealing with the responsibility of that. And I reread some old. It's not just a reporter. He was. So I reread some old Venom comics recently and I was like, I like these new Venom comics, but I was like, I kind of miss the simplicity of he's a crazy guy who has a, who has a
Starting point is 01:26:02 who has, who has a who has a who has a who has a evil alien pants. He's a homicidal weightlifting reporter who has alien pants. And the alien pants share a desire to kill Spider-Man. But but that's a great way to put it that the Fast and Furious movies show that like you can create movie original stuff that taps into the feeling of comics or the storytelling of comics without just pulling those characters directly. And now I want to have, I want to say, fast and furious comic where they're just superheroes. They're just weird costumes. Out and out do that stuff, you know. And then that gets adapted into a movie, then the comics have to change to accommodate
Starting point is 01:26:36 the movie changes. Oh, kind of like a hairspray or the upcoming Mean Girls movie. Exactly. Very much. So is they, are they doing movie based on the Mean Girls musical? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Same thing. Yeah. With Tim Meadows and Tina Fey reprising their roles, which is kind of like how? Let's go on to the last segment where we recommend movies. Oh, shoot. That you might enjoy watching. So I watched a movie like, let me preface this by saying, I liked fast
Starting point is 01:27:08 not. I really like when movie theaters have series, like a branded series of- Siri the phone app? Well, like, the movie I'm going to talk about, I saw Weird Wednesday at the Alamo, but then there's also the Nighthawk, our friend Christina Ketchiopo, does like wonderful, programs, wonderful series like she had one on 80s or I think 90s, actually, erotic thrillers. But this one was a weird Wednesday. And like I like that just because if it's branded as part of one of these series, sometimes I will see a movie in the theater or just at all that I would not have ever seen on my own. Like the fact that it is stamped with this sort of just general category,
Starting point is 01:28:02 I'm like, oh yeah, I like that series. I'll see what this is all about. It's creating a context in which you can understand it and enjoy it. And, and pre-understand it, you know. Yeah, and I went out and I saw Norman Mailer's tough guys don't dance, which is a bizarre, bizarre movie. That was a movie that I said that, so I'll tell you just briefly, my experience, the first time I almost saw it, was when I was a teenager, and it was my grandmother,
Starting point is 01:28:31 I saw like 13, I went with my grandmother to the Museum of Modern Art, and she's like, oh, well, there's this movie playing today. We'll go to see this at about eight minutes in. She said, this is not for us, and we've got to be locked out of the theater. Yeah, I would understand why one's grandma would react to that. It's one of these movies I wouldn't call it good and I would say that you definitely
Starting point is 01:28:56 want to watch it with other people to enjoy sort of collective confusion at the film. But I wouldn't just say it's like awful, there's like stuff in it that genuinely works, but it is very strange. It is a movie that has like this purple tough guy dialogue that would sound bizarre, even coming out of Humphrey Bogart. Like it would be a little much in an old movie. And instead it's coming out of Ryan O'Neill and a bunch of people wildly overacting in like a movie
Starting point is 01:29:32 made in 1987. In 1987, a year after critters changed the way we think about film. Exactly. And it's the year, what, seven son of a seven son was released. I mean, what a big year. Yeah. Huge year culture. Yeah. There's also plot-wise, there's way more cucking in the movie than you expect. Just a whole lot of cucking. And I actually, I think it was, I'm sorry, I think it was somewhere in time came out. It's a fuck. Oh, no, maybe you're right. Yeah. So I think you're all right. I think it was somewhere in time. Still a huge year for culture. Great album. Anyway, so weird crime story. I couldn't was somewhere in time. Still a huge year for culture, great album. Mm-hmm.
Starting point is 01:30:05 Anyway, it's a weird crime story. I couldn't begin to explain. It's a movie that like I contextualize as, say, a weird Wednesday. If you were interested in strange films in film the history, this is a wild one for you. And I'll leave it there, I guess. But I really enjoyed myself. It's, I left a lot. It's a wild one.
Starting point is 01:30:31 Would you describe it as something wild? No, I would describe the film something wild is something wild. Okay. Would you say it's good for indulging your wild side? What? I'm saying it's full of wild things. No. Not really.
Starting point is 01:30:50 Okay, I'm going to recommend a movie. I don't think we've recommended yet, but I know Dan and I have both watched. It's a horror movie, big surprise. It's a movie called A Wounded Phone on Shutter. It's about a young woman who is a museum curator and decides to get back into the dating pool and starts dating a guy who is right off the bat. You know he's a bad, bad guy. And it's very much in the vein of like the like girl you in danger like it is very clear.
Starting point is 01:31:22 There's a mistake she should not be going on a couple's weekend with this guy, she just met who is, behaves creepy the whole time. But it takes, it goes in very strange directions and has some really fun, like creature effects. And it's very stylish in a way that felt super original and new. And if you're looking for, yeah, if you're looking for that kind of a, like a thriller, where you don't quite know who were like the balance of power between the, the victim and the hunter, like continues to like shift back and forth a little bit, it's, yeah, it's great. A wounded fawn, unshutter. I'm going to recommend two movies that are science fictiony related.
Starting point is 01:32:09 One of them is a documentary. I recently watched Kurt Vonnegut Unstuck in Time from 2021, which is a documentary about the life of Kurt Vonnegut and also about his relationship with the director of the movie Robert Whitey. I think his name is Or Weedy. He also was the principal director for Kirby enthusiasm for most of its run, or at least early on in the first few seasons. So he had been making a documentary about Kurt Vonnegut for roughly 40 years. And so he has footage of him interviewing Kurt Vonnegut
Starting point is 01:32:41 over that period of time until Vonnegut's death. And it was just a really good kind of portrait of Kervani Gett. One thing I learned from it, Kervani Gett was a very important writer to me in high school as he was to many people in high school. And that he talks a lot to the diamond about how funny he is. And Kervani Gett thinks he's very funny. And I've never really, I love his books,
Starting point is 01:32:57 but I've never really found them funny. And so it's made me want to go back and reread them to see if I just missed a lot of the jokes. But it's a very good documentary. And it does not, it does a good job, I think, of expressing what a special writer he was and also the special relationship he had with certain people
Starting point is 01:33:13 while not whitewashing him or making him out to be, you know, just a great guy, you know. It touches on how he could be a difficult person as well. And the other movie is one that speaking of my experience with Red Rock West, earlier in the episode, a movie I watched when I was too young to really get it, and I finally rewatched it again, and that is Dark Star from 1974,
Starting point is 01:33:33 the John Carpenter Dan O'Bannon movie, which I remember as a kid watching it and not really getting it, and watching it now and being like, one, I think this movie is very funny, but also that it's a very funny movie that works as a science fiction movie. It's a very funny movie that works as a science fiction movie. It's a parody science fiction
Starting point is 01:33:47 that works as a good science fiction story and has a surprisingly kind of touching ending and despite the fact that it is, it's one of these movies that I feel like I don't see as many of them now, even though it should be easier to make them now, where it looks very cheap, while still looking way more expensive than it was. You know, like, it looks like a cheap movie, but at no point are you like,
Starting point is 01:34:08 oh, yeah, well, that's just a hallway of a building. Like, they feel like they're on a cheap spaceship set, but you leave it to spaceship. Yeah. Yeah. The years ago, bam, here in Brooklyn did a, did a series of all of John Carpenter movies and also like movies that inspired John Carpenter. And that was, I got to see Dark Star on the big screen, which was great. Well, it was so much fun to see on a big screen and like a packed theater full of people. Yeah, well, I think they also did a screening of Sorcerer in that run. And that was great too.
Starting point is 01:34:40 And I mean, to your point of how it looks good to, I mean, this is sort of different than what you're saying, because it's not as science fiction in a movie. But I do think that there's something to older movies like digital filmmaking has like raised the floor on how movies look, but I think they've also lowered the ceiling because it's less thought has to be put into getting a good image and it can be done so quickly that maybe some of the pre-planning and art of it gets lost. I mean, maybe I'm just an old man, but I know that I was watching a- It both is possible.
Starting point is 01:35:17 I was watching a dumb movie for the bad movie night that I referenced from time to time, the taking of Beverly Hills, which is a movie about a, an aging footballer who goes with math, math fewer fruers, sorry, is a like cop, a neurotic cop, and they, but they team up to stop a plot by the police and Robert Davi to take Beverly Hills and steal the sounds, Stewart is gonna have Hills or yes. Beverly Hills is a neighborhood. So, how are they taking it? They're stealing a bunch of shit from Beverly. Like, but my point is, like, this dumb action movie directed by Sydney J. Fury, a journey
Starting point is 01:36:02 man director if there ever was one who made the Ippchrist file and also Ladybugs, but it looks beautiful, like compared to like. You're saying he's a one man refutation in the Oxford theory. Yeah. I'm just saying, like, for what it is, like, I'm like, wow, like movies, like even cheat movies, you still look good. Yeah, especially when you got fucking Bobby Dovey and Matt fucking Fru in it. Yeah. Yeah, Max Edger himself. Sure. Yeah. I think the, no, but you're, you're right. I mean, it is one of those things that you pointed
Starting point is 01:36:34 out like, it's the thing you think about when it comes to lighting, like movies feeling darker is that there isn't enough thought being put into, I feel like there isn't enough thought being put into lighting, or it's because of the way that, like the way that like digital cameras work, I don't know, I don't know, technical shifts. I feel like a lot of times people are like, well, we can like do grading after the fact and blah, blah, blah, blah. And then just, I don't know if it looks as good.
Starting point is 01:37:00 I don't know if I, this is me just making something up kind of, but I wonder if it has maybe something to do with that, but also something to do with how these movies are expected to be seen. That these are not expected to be seen for the most part in theaters on large screens. And as big as someone's television screen is, it's still a size that hides a little bit more than a, than a movie screen does. I don't know. I could be wrong, but I do think that there is a, there's a certain amount of thought that
Starting point is 01:37:25 often doesn't get put into these movies, but at the same time, there's plenty of older movies pre-digital that were very little thought was put into what was going on. And something like dark star is not a standard mood. Like you can tell that you can tell that at the very least that Dan O'Bannon, seeing as he wrote it and stars in it and edited it, like that he's all in. Like he's putting a lot into this, you know. Yeah. And it was an expanded student film.
Starting point is 01:37:47 It's like it's a whole nother thing. And it went on to greatly influence alien. We all, you know, we all saw Yudorovsky's doon, great movie talks about it entirely. The how Danobannon, you know, and how Dune gets Danobannon and that, and that, and dark star has a whole sequence that involves an alien being you know kind of hunted through a spaceship and it's about hunting someone else. But the what's that gonna say? Well, we're gonna know. We'll never know. We may never know. Something about dark star. Oh for anyone I was gonna say for anyone who
Starting point is 01:38:20 hasn't who isn't familiar with it if you're interested in seeing it. It's essentially it's from the 70s and it's a very 70s movie, and that it is looking at science fiction tropes through the lens of kind of Vietnam type experience. These are like, this is a deep space mission, and the guys in it are essentially, they've grown their hair long and their beard's out because they've been on this mission forever, they're tired of it, the glamour and the romance and the heroism of being out in space is gone. And what really struck me about it is that this is 1974.
Starting point is 01:38:47 It's pre-Star Wars. And so the science fiction trope they're dealing with is still kind of like this Star Trek semi-militarized but very American earth-based science fiction. And I feel like after Star Wars so much of science fiction comedy became Star Wars type stuff. Or it's a totally alien world and there's some kind of, either a mysticism to it, or there's a lot of aliens or whatever. So it's kind of interesting to see a snapshot of what science fiction was in people's minds,
Starting point is 01:39:15 pre-Star Wars. Where science fiction was still about humans from Earth going places as opposed to out-and-out fantasy. But the most important thing is, it's just a funny, it's like a funny expanded student short film. And there are sequences that go on for way too long considering the movie is like 83 minutes long,
Starting point is 01:39:35 but I really like to watch that dark star, or if you want to watch a movie about a real person who really existed, Kurt Vonnegut unstuck in time. Well, I got a piece. So let's wrap it up quick. This has been the flop house. You're really doing a lot of pull in the curtain back. We're part of the maximum fun network.
Starting point is 01:39:56 Go over to maximumfun.org, check out all the other great podcasts. While you're on the internet, why not check out what our producer out Smith is up to. He makes his own podcast and music and all sorts of things under the name Howell Dottie. But until next time, when we will be doing critters next, I have been, well, I mean, we'll have a meeting
Starting point is 01:40:22 in between, but the next full episode. Cool, good to see you. Anyway, I have been doing that to P Dan. I have been well, I mean, we'll have a many in between, but the next full episode, cool. Anyway, I have been Dan McCoy. I've been, you know what, I'm gonna just drag this on. So what's up on a time? Now, my name is Stuart Wellington. And my grandmother told me of a prophecy. Oh, wow.
Starting point is 01:40:41 A prophecy. We're starting a new bit that I would be Elliot Kaelin. So Dan, you can go pay. Bye. Like the banshees of Inner Sharon. One of the top picks of the year. I haven't seen it. I haven't seen it. It was great. Now what if Tilda Swinton had been in that movie? We're playing the what if Tilda Swinton had played characters like if Tilda Swinton had been tar? I mean, it would have been slightly different, but I know that would have been different.
Starting point is 01:41:16 It would have been, it might be, saying that we're playing that is. Her breakdown would have been crazy. Yeah. I am going to warn you, you are doing the summary and that is a difficult road to walk with two interrupting ass wipes. That's what we are. Yep. Maximumfun.org. Comedy and culture. Artist-owned audience supported.
Starting point is 01:41:36 and supported.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.