The Flop House - FH Mini 21 - Stuey Goes to Hollywood

Episode Date: January 9, 2021

Stuart cracks the code to TV writing success, and gets some notes from his friends in the industry.Also, we're doing a new Flop House VIRTUAL LIVE SHOW! On Saturday, February 6th, at 9 pm Eastern, we'll be talking about TEEN WOLF, America's top basketball movie! We'll also be doing presentations, Q&A, and a few NEW SURPRISES! Worried that you CAN'T WATCH LIVE? Worry not! Ticket holders have a week to watch!Just $10 for a ticket! Buy them HERE!

Hey there and welcome to another flop house mini, a shorter off-week episode of a podcast that's normally about watching bad movies and talking about it, but on these minis we just kind of talk about whatever the fuck. I'm your host Stuart Wellington and joining me are my co-hosts, Dan McCoy. And Elliot Kaelan. Hey guys, do you like my vocal fry? No, I don't. Hey, does that burger come with a side of fries? You know, in England, they call it vocal chips. you know, in England they call it vocal chips. Oh, they do.

That's cool. That's reshore. Now guys, time's been a little bit tough for everybody, for well, a lot of reasons, at least for me. We're gonna focus on me though. Me is, it's all about me today. Well, that's why we have this time, Stu, so you can, this is your time, you know, that you're paying for it, just unload, you know?

Yeah, we had the New Year's Eve and New Year's Day, and now this is Stoogers Day, where we focus on Stoogers. Yeah. And on Stoogers Day, I got a text from my therapist, he's like, hey, why aren't you coming in today? You have an appointment, I'm like, oh no, I'm doing a podcast, I need therapy today. And your therapist was like, you do oh no, I'm doing a podcast. I need therapy today And your therapist was like you do a podcast. You must be super cool I'm like, yeah, we haven't covered this before. It's not that big part of my life

Because that's a big part of therapy. I mean is it is being there isn't telling you're you're what charge Yeah, that's what a therapist patient or client is't telling you what charge? That's what a therapist patient or client is known as is a charge? Yeah, they are super cool. Yeah, yeah, word. So, time's a little bit tough, as I said, smiling through the tears. Luckily the podcast's going okay, but I don't know if you guys know this,

but my other career in addition to being a podcaster is I own a couple of bars and the barb is hit or hit a rocky patch lately. Not a lot of people going out. And you know, so you're going to bring the booze to them with booze drones. Now you just slap a bottle on a drone, send it over. We are breaking several interstate commerce laws, so. And international, because they're going overseas.

Uh huh. And I'm slapping cameras on those drones so I can get as much found footage as possible. What's that sound footage per se? I mean, I guess, it pulled the drone's crash. What if he picks up a ghost or a bluer witch on that drone? That's found footage.

Yeah, I found it. And then he walked over the drone and picked it up using his feet when he walked that's footage. All right. So for people who aren't familiar with, you know, I'm given everybody a peak of our private lives. Some people might not be familiar with us. For some folks, for some listeners, this might be their first episode in which case, turn it off, go listen to a different one.

Listen to the one where I talk about Warhammer. But- That's a good, better idea what the show's like. I just want, basically, what I'm trying to say is that of the three of us, I'm the only one who is at a working TV writer. So I thought, why not we make it all three of us are TV writers? Why not we make it? So we make it indeed. You've got that right here.

You do talk like my two-year-old says things like, yeah, I did do did that. Yeah, so I'm introducing you. Just my two-year-old all the time, I'll be like, do you want this cookie? I do want that cookie. Wait, you don't want it? No, I do. And it's like, you don't need to use so many words.

Just say yes. Yeah. I mean, do your children get frustrated with being interrupted all the time or do you just reserve that shit for me and Dan? Oh, no, no, it's a real, it's a real, come up in where I'm constantly interrupted by them. So we, I'd like to introduce a new segment here on the flop house mini, and it is called Stuart Hollywoodington colon apotheosis. Okay.

I would love to see where this is headed. I'm not sure it's Holly Woodington, Colin Apotheosis. Okay. I would love to see where this is headed. This is to this doubles as a metal album. Uh-huh, yep. So guys, clearly, I love movies, I love cinema, but I also have a deep, sharp understanding for television. As you guys might remember on a previous episode, I created the perfect description of all television. As you guys might remember on a previous episode, I created the perfect description of all television.

The perfect balance for any TV show is Cop and Nautocop. So the best way for me to get a high-paying Hollywood job now that I have already figured out the secret to Hollywood is to pitch. I mean, you realize that's really more of a movie pitch. Well, so wait, no, by the way, you're coppin' not a cop, like every TV show, eh? Yeah, you got like, say, Castle, you got cop

and then a paperback mystery writer, I mean, I guess they worked it start out. Okay, so that's Castle, that's one show out of the peak television of six or seven more shows. I mean, what about bones, dude? One of them's a cop and the other one's bones, I think. And the other one's a skeleton, that's true. I mean, and on girls, Lena Dunham is a cop

and her friends are not cops, and... The scarecrow and Mrs. King, that's a spy, not a spy, but it's basically the same thing. Moonlighting is a detective, not a detective. I love that you really have your finger on the pole stand of what's going on with TV these days. Yeah I just say it was a classic formula now which one was hard castle and which one was McCormick Which one was Simon and which one was Simon?

So I know I assume Jake was the cop since the fat man could not pass the physical Oh, you would be surprised I like that was a show that I got very excited about to watch as a kid It seemed like an adult program and when I stayed up about to watch as a kid. It seemed like an adult program. And when I stayed up late to watch it, I felt like I was being an adult. So I figured, now you guys, once again, I'm turning to you guys. You guys are the professionals in this business. I figured I'm assuming the best way to get a high paying Hollywood gig, Ellie, I'm looking to you for this one.

The best way is to pitch a hit TV show, just like take it, hit TV show and pitch it straight forward and that's how you get the job. You mean take a show that's already a hit and pitch it again or pitch a show that becomes a hit? Well, we'll see. So I've been watching a lot of Cobra Kai lately and I don't know if you guys are familiar, it's a hot TV show that takes a popular movie from the 1980s karate kidate Kid. The people have a lot of nostalgia for, and then they create a sequel that comes out, a sequel to the story that's kind of like a modern take on it. In this case, it adds a new perspective where we have like Johnny who is previously the villain. It's set many

years later and the previous villain's actually an unlikely hero, and it kind of updates the whole thing. And I feel like that is, with that in mind, Stuart Hollywoodington is going to take it up to the next level, and you guys are gonna help me with some of these pitches. How does that sound? You guys think you can, without interrupting me a million times, let's see.

I can't promise you that part, but I will say this, I will say not joking, that is a very good strategy. If you can find a previously existing piece of IP that has an nostalgia and name value and you find a new take on it that you can show a fire, adapt into a show, then yes, that is a good way to get into professional television writing. Now, to get the meetings to pitch this show is going to take a number of more steps, but we'll get to that later. Hit us with these pitches, give us these pitches.

So I feel like a natural progression. So I mainly think about movies that I remember watching a lot as a kid since I'm already super familiar with it. I have a memory like a steel trap. So the first one I'm gonna go with that I think is, that I associate, there is very similar in some ways to karate kid is back to the future. And this is an easy one, would go with that I think is, that I associate, there's very similar in some ways to Karate Kid is back to the future.

And this is an easy one because an easy twist on it is instead of worrying about that Marty McFly guy, let's find out what Biff is all about, right? Now here we have Biff, he's an old man, he senses that there's something kind of wrong with his life, something wrong with the universe. Things aren't quite how they should be. He should be on top, not this Marty McFly clown. So due to something that will work out in time, he travels through, he finds a way to travel through time and space to try and make things right or wrong depending on your perspective. Uh, and finally get what's his.

So what do you think guys? We can bring all, uh, how hard do you think this will be? I feel like the whole cast is still alive, right? Dan, jump on IMDB. You got to find out if the whole cast is still alive. We need the whole cast in. It only works with the whole cast. I mean, Chris Ben Glover is going to be hard to get,

but let's bring him in, you know? Uh, I feel like Chris Ben Glover would be down when he hears that this is a fresh new take on the material. I mean, let's, let's gloss over the fact that the star Michael J. Fox has, has retired for health related reasons and just keep going with the premise. Other than that, it is a, that is a solid, solid adaptation premise. So here's what I'm going to tell you is Biff, the Biff we see at the end of the first movie who is waxing George McFly's car

because he's just, you know, he's a loser now. He's visited by the Council of Cross-Time Biffs. That's right, I'm stealing that premise from the Avengers. Because back to the future two, introduced us to the concept of alternate dimensions. There is an alternate world where Biff is the president mayor of wherever they live, whatever, you know, he's basically Trump, but just in that one town. And they've decided that this bif is not cutting it. And he's got

to figure out a way to get back on top or else they're going to revoke his bif card, which basically means killing him or racing as I his existence or something like that, you know. Now it's it's eerie how similar that is to like a Rick and Morty episode. Yeah. Yeah. But by the way, pitching a Rick and Morty episode, another way to get a hot Hollywood gig out of match. That's true. I mean, that is, I had a conversation with another entertainment professional recently, where I was like, well, Rick and Morty is just back to the future, but they're mean to

each other. And the guy was like, wait, what? He had not realized it, had not put two and two together. Oh, that's great. I do think, well, see, here's my gloss on this, though. I do think that you're going to get, you're not going to get past the fact that, let's call him Biff Prime is a, is a sex criminal. So, I think that's going to be a far to redeem that character. So the thing about Back to the Future is everyone and Back to the Future is just clones of their parents, except for Crispin Glover and Leotops.

Like either clones or it leaps a generation, or like in weird cases, Leotopsin, who is not part of the McFly line, the great-great-grandmother in the Old West still looks like Leotopson. So it's about, much like Star Wars, it's about the bloodlines of these families. So what if there's a Biff further down the line on the bloodline who is maybe a nicer Biff, who realizes that, you know, his anger is that not only has Marty ruined Biff Prime's life, but the entire Biff family has now been destroyed. Here's where I'm going to, here's where I'm going to try to, try to not yes and you dance.

So I'm going to say one, this is the age of the anti hero. So like, because is a bad boy. That bad boy means that he assaulted Leotomps and at the prime. I don't think we want to go down this road, Ellie. I think, and he's, look, if it's, we want, that one of the hottest TV shows of the Golden Age of Television, the one about a mobster who kills all the people closest to him, the one about a mild man or man who becomes a drug dealer

and kills all the people closest to him, and the one about an ad man who just cannot keep his dick in his pants. And it's just lying his head off. I mean, Elliott, for sure, for reality, we can sell a show about a horrible person. But for the funsos of laugh-em-ups, I was just trying to steer this into the ass. Here's what I'm going to say. Here's what I'm going to say. So I'll say that is the series is not about Biff trying to get back on top now. Forget that. Biff discovers that all of Marty McFly

is bouncing around in time, has really worked and damaged the space time continuum. Am I drawing on another Marvel comic storyline, ESIM, the age of Ultron, crossover, not the movie? And so he's an unlikely hero, because he's a bad guy, but his only chance to turn over a new leaf and redeem himself is to fix the space-time continuum

because this Martin McFly guy has been playing the universe like it's an electric guitar at a prom. And so he's not the right man for the job, but he's the man who has to do the job. Biff to the future. Coming to Apple TV, probably. All right, how about this? What if Scott Bakula just leaps into a bunch of,

like a shit ton of Biff's, like, you know, like Biff has been fucking up, you know, like whether it's Grand Pop Biff or Main Biff, like they've been fucking up for generations. So Scott Bakula just, you know, like leaps through like four or five Biff's, it's a limited series, you know, on HBO a limited series on HBO. So you're positive right at the beginning that Quantum leaping back to the future take place in the same universe. Yes.

Makes a lot of sense to me. I don't know if you forgot that. Those are two different things. But they. Oh, a crossover between existing properties isn't going to be profitable, Elliot. Yeah. You're taking your eyes off the prize, which

is to get stewarded know, get Stuart a job. No, no, I'm just, I'm just saying it's twice as much IP that you're going to have to get the rights to. And that's difficult. But again, this is just for fun. So throw whatever you want in there, throw Jurassic Park in there, throw shinlers, list in there, they're all, all the Spielberg movies too. Throw them in there, all the Roberts and Mackas and Spielberg movies and, I'm going to throw them in one thing. They got to take the poll to express. Ready player one. I mean, that is ready by your one thing.

Yeah, you're basically just describing the t-shirts that keep getting pitched to me on Instagram and Facebook. So I got a whole bunch of these to get through. So I'm going to move to the next one and to help me with this one, I'm going to need a little help from another pitchman. My favorite pitch man I know. Charlene Wellington, come on down. Hi guys.

Let me set you up here. So this one we're going to do. We're going to do a little sequel or prequel. I don't exactly know what you guys have in mind here. No, no. Stuart, Charlene is your daughter. This is how you flatter women, Dan. Yeah. Well, yeah.

Well, pretty good. I mean, I guess I do have a new ring light, so our skin looks really great. Hey, it does look good. But look great. And I apologize. I should not have been so misogynist with my compliments. Ultimately, I'll work the other way. Charlene, is this your son, Stuart?

I mean, based on most of my behavior and interest, you can guess that. So we're gonna, this is gonna be a sequel prequel or something related to one of my favorite movies growing up, Better Off Dead. Better Off Dead, my favorite Christmas movie. Better Off Dead, the story of the Paperboy. So the Paperboy has all grown up.

He's got a successful business, nothing fancy, maybe like a landscaping business. Lane is the villain because, yeah, because he's rich. He's got, he can afford to put his girlfriend's face on every one of his hangers. And it's not like now, he had to get those printed. It's not like now where you just printed on your computer. Like he had to take these photos, get the film developed, go to the he had to get those printed. It's not like now where you just printed on your computer.

Like he had to take these photos, get the film developed, go to the photo mat, get them all printed, and have them put on all the hangers. And this guy, I mean, I don't know if you've ever had a paper out, but you have to pay an advance for the papers. Yes, yes, I did have a paper out. We see in newsies, we know how that works.

He just refuses to pay $2 and no tip. That's ridiculous. So, muscles is here. Anyway, Lane is the villain. And it's like all the paper boys, they're all grown up. And I think maybe they have a successful landscaping business. And all the kids in the neighborhood work for them,

but they're also in competition with like the rich guys' kids, right? Okay, you following me? Yeah, I'm kind of not sure why he's still mad about the $2 at this point. If he clearly knows successful landscaper. No, he's not mad, he's moved on. He's moved on.

He's a successful landscaper, but now like the neighborhood kids work for him, you know the less fortunate, well less rich kids and you know the kids of the skiers They're like in competition. They hate each other. So it sounds like only good things seem to happen on the show Yes, but on tarage, but for paper But it's narrated kind of like those But it's narrated kind of like those Rudolph the reindeer movies by the hamburger in a van hit any man hell and sound a like voice narrated it which I would have to break

Does this booger have a kid doing it or is it just all the characters have No, I just have one page of notes. Booger has like a hardware store or something and he's just fine. He's doing fine. Ricky's a whore. Ricky's mom. Is that a nursing home? Hello, this is a show about people growing up and having respectable middle class small businesses. Like no one's super wealthy.

Right, what you know. No one's super wealthy. Everyone's doing fine. There's stable. Well, there's the wealthy. There's super wealthy. Everyone's doing fine. There's the wealthy. There's the wealthy kids and the working glass kids. And they're at odds. Okay. I don't think they do karate though.

This sounds like the polar opposite of the real housewise franchise. Because nobody's wealthy and there's no drama. I mean, you could go like the Riverdale route with this and it would be all about the sexy children of the better off dead crew. I don't know that you want to say sexy children. Okay. I, children in the sense that like I am the child of my parents, Elliot. I know, no, no, I knew what you meant.

I just, someone's going to make a soundboard where you press a button. It's you saying sexy children and you don't want that. And now I've said it. So now they can make that soundboard for me. And all the kids hang out at the Porquies hamburger joint. Yeah, Porquies. That's like their peach pit. It's called Porquies Beach Pit.

I mean, it's a real slice of life story. It feels like this is, you know, it's, it's, I wonder if this is maybe more of a breaking away show, the way you're describing it, you know. I think instead of fighting, they have song and dance offs. Mm-hmm. They just break into song. Okay.

Well, everybody loves songs and dances. So that was, that's our pitch for better off dead. Everybody has a nice business. Everybody's doing okay, but not great. And then there's songs and dancing. I mean, I think right now- I think the kids hang out in a place. I'm nursing home.

Oh, okay, yeah. And the what? Not too, okay. I mean, right now though, I think people have a real thirst for a show that's mostly just pleasant. I mean, that's what everyone wants in quarantine time. I know he's extraordinary playlists, but nobody's dying. Yeah, there you go.

I mean, shit's Creek has ended, right? So there's real room for like a show that just makes you feel, just makes you feel warm. Yeah, it'll be a while before we get some new Ted Lasso. You got to fill that niche. Yeah, I don't have Apple Plus. So, we'll move it out of the next one. I gotta think, this is a one percenter gripe. I gotta think in the mail that was like, for a word season, here's your viewing code for Apple Plus

for your consideration. I was like, oh great, I'll finally get to watch that Ted Lasso show. And then it was just for their original movies. So I can watch that Tom Hanks World War II Navy movie. And it's like, great, thanks. I wanted to see Ted Leslie. But, Elliot, you're a dad, that is right up your alley.

I did say, I did say when my wife and I looked at it, I did say, hmm, this is solid dad stuff. This is... Well, hmm, I wonder how many epilepsy has on that thing he's wearing. You know, let me pause the movie here just to talk about the tonnage that that ship could carry in those types of waters. It's not riding low enough. Macho man to the top rope.

The flying oboe, the cover. We've got a new champion! We've got a new champion! We're here with Macho Man Rande Savage after his big win to become the new World Champion. What are you going to do now, Mach? I'm going to go listen to the newest episode of the Tights and Fights podcast, oh yeah. Tell us more about this podcast. It's the podcast of power, too sweet to be sour, funky like a monkey, woke discussions man, and jokes about wrestler's fashion choices, myself excluded.

I can't wait to listen. Neither can I. You can find it Saturdays on Maximum Fun. Oh yeah, dig it. So I think this is talking about Epolettes and Tonage. I think it's a perfect time for us to take a little break from all this. I know everybody's worked up, listening to all my pitches.

By the way, I forgot to say this right up front, but fucking TM, dude, nobody can steal this shit. This is mine. It's all based on pre-existing material than other people in the least. Okay. Dear God, do not not give Charlene credit. Let me tell you.

Okay, so we're going to do a quick word from our sponsors. That's who keeps the lights on here at the Flop House. And it's the Flop House that keeps the lights on in my life. This word is the sponsor for today's episode is Squarespace. Squarespace is a way to make a beautiful website. You can turn your cool idea into a brand new website. You can blog or publish content. You can sell stuff. You can sell services of all kinds, like screenwriting help, like what I'm asking for right now. And more. Squarespace does this by giving you beautiful customizable templates created by world-class designers. Not just regular old designers like the one you see down the street, unless they are a world-class designer,

in which case, more power to them. They're probably working for Squarespace. Yeah. Everything is optimized for mobile right out of the box. You don't have to, I don't know, like plug it into something else and do something else and twist a knob and pull a lever. It's ready to go right out of the box. And it provides a new way to buy domains and choose from over 200 extensions. I'm assuming that has something to do with what you plug into your little

Google search bar. I don't know exactly. And it's free and secure hosting. So yeah, let's see. Man, I messed this one up. So go check out squarespace.com slash flop for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use the offer code flop FLOP to save 10% off of your first purchase of a website or domain. Oh, well, well, well, not so easy. Is it Mr. Wellington? Oh, look at what we have here. Oh, ta-ta-ta-tee. Oh, you caught me. You create a little petard by sending me the email

right before the show while I was doing other stuff. And then I stepped directly on that pet show. I was doing other stuff. And then I stepped right down that. Damn, that was entrapment. That was entrapment, yeah. I was prepared to read this. And then at the last minute, we decided it made more sense for Stuart Tury

if he was in the driver's seat. He would know where the natural break is. I feel like Dan, a friend would say, I'm prepared. Why don't you just tell me to go and then I'll And then I'll do it and then throwing you to the wolves the square space wolves I'm trying to be helpful square space Build it beautiful that used to be there. Look. That's not there

Square space the stability of the square with the openness of outer space. Yeah, okay guys We're back and you guys are helping me put together my TV pitches into some kind of what resume. I don't know, I don't know what I was saying. Please, this is your premise. So, welcome back to Steward Hollywoodington, Colin Apotheosis. The next property that I think is ripe for a sequel is a little movie called Coming to America. I mean, it is. They aren't releasing a sequel to that movie soon. Is it a TV show?

It's a movie that they're doing for what Amazon, I think. Well, it is either an Netflix, a home streaming service. So wait a minute. Wouldn't it make a lot of sense if they released a TV show at the same time to kind of like tie it all together uh... doesn't tie together was it will be a fine so the premise here is it is said in modern day uh... many years after the original movie came out uh... which i did not do the research to find out the exact release date.

And he is, you know, it's the 80s. The hero of the show is Daryl Janks, the heir to the soul glow fortune played by Eric Lasal. So it's years later, his life is in tatters. His fortune has dried up as soul glow has fallen out of style. He's haunted. Ironically, because as you've seen from the movie, Soul Glow does not dry out.

It leaves the hair with kind of a wet sheen all the time. I thought that would be a fun choice of words by me. And you're really- And he's also like- Enjoying pronouncing words too. Yeah. He's also like haunted by the robbery that he was That he wasn't and he wasn't able to stop that he had to rely on

Akeemed to stop from the robbery at the McDowell's. Yes, Samuel Jackson. Yeah, really role Maybe he's Samuel Jackson shows back up. We'll find out however He finds out that there's one way for us that so glows suddenly become very popular in one place in the world that's right zamunda so the only way for him to build his fortune back is to go back and began a coup against king a king yeah so yeah i think i mean i i haven't watched there a trailer out? I haven't watched the trailer for coming to America. Well, no, this coming to America is,

I think just about Eddie Murphy's son is now looking for a bride. I think is what it's about. It's not a dark side of the sun kind of mercenary is an Africa overthrowing the kingdom. Right, I think it was, I think it was maybe a sun he didn't know about as well. I'm not sure about this, but I think that might be worth it.

So, no, very different, very different different from the from the porno version coming in America, which was not not as big a success. It rarely is, right? Yeah, that's true. You know, the porno is usually is rarely as much a success or a bigger success than the original. I mean, I'd have to compare the numbers. I'd have to pull up the spreadsheet. I mean, I probably return on investment, they're pretty close, but like if you're just going by percentages. That's true, because proportionally,

the budgets are much smaller. And the advertising budgets, you have to assume, are much smaller. So I almost never see like a subway advertisement for a porno. Almost never, but you see him at subway, the restaurant, which is weird, but that's just the thing. Although I feel like a green that they made.

I feel like a lot of subway advertisements have been, I don't know, like, makeshift turned into porno advertisements, basically scrawled genitalia on everything. That's true. That's a fair point. But it's right, you never hear people say, like, did you know so and so that famous porno was actually based on a non-porn movie? It's just not a thing you hear. Maybe in just in the circles I travel in, you know.

Yeah, I mean, sometimes I see somebody mention it on Reddit and I'm like, oh cool, upvote, but you know, okay. So we move on. We're moving on to the next property. This is the next one. I'm going to. Okay, so coming to America, we didn't really help you with. I apologize.

It seems like it was. It sounds like it next. Yeah, it sounds like it was perfect. The next one we're gonna we're gonna use is cocoon. That's right. We are gonna follow this story. Obviously, I'm gonna continue the tradition or tradition. I'm gonna continue the theme of like kind of modernizing it. And so we're going to follow the poor guy who had to clean the pools at the retirement meeting. That's right. It had to deal with all that pod gunk and all the old person's jizz and whatever. Wait. And Steve Gutenberg's.

Thank you, Stu. I mean, that part makes sense because there's that weird pool sexy. But yes. Dan, you know as soon as those old people were feeling young, they were just making the most out of it. In the pool? Yeah, it's right there. Okay.

Yeah, you're already, and you're already in like your trunks or whatever, or I don't know, what do you want to do? I guess if you found a fountain of youth pool, why not have sex in it? Yeah. So imagine this poor guy is managed to find one of those pod things, and he decides to use it and open up a little B and B with a little magical spring in it. Maybe he takes his daughter along, maybe a friend who's a chef. OK.

Maybe he's looking for love, but you know, he never really finds it. Wait, is this, is this just turned into Gilmore girls? Then his daughter gets caught up in like a similar pod situation. And then the whole cycle just continues over and over. Yeah, I guess, I mean, I guess if you're going to, you know, if you're going to steal, you might as well steal from the best, right? Sure. You have the best cocoon and Gilmore girls

doesn't get me better. Too very pleasant entertainment. Okay, so, man, you guys have provided very few notes on these. You're really good. There's a reason when the Library of Congress buried that time capsule for the year 10,000 that all they put in it was a DVD of cocoon and a bought complete set of Gilmore Girls and that was it.

Guaranteed entertainment. I think it's like the stint. I know that said you're welcome future. A cataclyl for Laura Lyle. Okay, so another movie that I think that I watched a lot as a kid that I did. There's more. Great TV show. Okay. Yep.

I didn't know you were following the comedy rule of 18s. Okay, go ahead. Yeah. So, of course, I think the movie that would make a perfect TV show following this formula is Goonies. That's right, we're going to follow the Fratellis. They're out of prison. They team up with the rich jerks to try and take over the town.

Maybe while they're searching around, they find a second pirate ship. Maybe that ship is crewed by a bunch of ghost pirates. Maybe those ghost pirates are ghosts until they find the last piece of cursed gold. Now the fortellies are rocked by the existence of an afterlife and ghost and shit. So that raised the possibility that maybe they can bring mama fortellied back to life using magic. So our heroes travel around the globe, seeking forbidden knowledge and getting into sexy adventures. The fratellis.

So I gave you a lot of I gave you a big meal right now. I know you want to take your time with it. So they leave the goonies down pretty fairly early in the pilot. It sounds like. Yeah, you know, I do want to see more sort of gangster three stooge's antics. Now, here's here's my pitch for season the season one are it starts with them at the captains of this ghost pirate ship. And then it's like like You're probably wondering how we got into this the rest of the season is just them Finding stuff and the last episode they finally find that ghost pirate ship Yeah, it's like them you know figuring out what what their role is in the town now and like

Morning their mother and then Having to you know eventually they find find clues to what the pirate other pirate ship under the town in the caverns. Yeah, fuck it. We can have more pirate ships who cares. Yeah, each pirate ship just has clues to the next pirate ship. Yeah, it would be silly if there was only two pirate ships. Yes.

You're right, you're right, you're right. It would be unbelievable, unbelievable. Like, one makes, makes sense, unbelievable. Unbelievable unrealistic like one makes makes sense Okay, a single pirate ship that makes sense but two that's like no, there's got to be way more Yeah, it's like I mean feels like a coincidence But if there's seven of them and it's like okay. It's just a place where pirate ships go Yeah, you can be like you can do it sort of like a where in the world is Carmen San Diego of like trying to find these pirate ships And it would be like

it's like a game show. Well, they're like, yes, no, no, no, no, no, no, trotting adventure where it's like, where's the next pirate ship? We could be anywhere. And like, well, no, I think it's number one is probably on the water. So let's cut out everything that's not on the water. Um, not, you know, they, they, they've, the first pirate ship they found in a cave. That wasn't it was on the water cave. It's not like open water, but there's water in the cave. There was water in the cave. That's true. What was this?

The sloth going to bet you know shit. He's the star of the show. Okay. You should be. He's a lot. Yeah. So is the show called sloth? Or is it called the Fratellis?

I mean, sloth in the Fratellis. Well, it's. Well, the Fratellis makes the most. That's the people are going to call that anyway. Well, that's the Fratellis? I mean, Sloth and the Fratellis. Well, it's, Sloth and the Fratellis makes the most, I mean, the Fratellis, people are gonna call that anyway. Well, the Fratellis just sounds like it's a sitcom about a wacky Italian family, you know.

It starts out being Sloth and the Fratellis. Like the same way my parents called Happy Days, Fonzie. How people used to call Happy Days just Fonzie or people used to call Alf, Alf, and you're like, the show's called alf. No, no, alf is called alf. That's all I've said. People are called dinosaurs, dinosaurs,

because it was filled with all those fucking dinosaurs. They're just calling dinosaurs baby dinosaurs. And it's like, it's easier if you just say the real name. It's baby sinclair. Oh, damn it. Wow. So I feel like, I feel like the last possible thing we could talk about then From a movie from the 1980s of course is teen wolf, right? Yeah

Yeah, that is a hit movie from the 1980s and inexplicable hit movie from the 1980s And if you're interested in hearing us talk about Teen Wolf, a hit movie from the 1980s, well, we got something nice for you up our sleeves. Dan. Well, we're doing a live show online where we talk about Teen Wolf and we do some presentations in Q&A like we do in a normal live show, but we've also added a few new segments and wrinkles to the proceedings. People love wrinkles.

Surprises, things that could go wrong. Yep, that's what everyone loves. And we're going to do that on Saturday, the 6th of February. That's nine Eastern. That would be 6th Pacific. This is a ticketed event, unlike the charitable ones we did before. This is a ticketed event, but it is a mere $10 to get that ticket. Where do you get it, Eliot?

Well, you just go to www.theflaphouse.simpletix.com. That's S-I-M-P-L-E-T-I-X. www.theflaphouse.simpletix.com. It couldn't be easier. Go to that URL and then buy a ticket for $10. That will give you access to the show live as well as access to a recording of the show, which will be archived for one week.

So if you can't make it, Saturday, February 6th, 9 PM Eastern, 6 PM Pacific, like say you're some widow baby that's gotta go to bed, way and way, I'm so tired. Then just still buy that ticket and you can watch the show at your leisure 9 p.m. Eastern, 6 p.m. Pacific, like say you're some widow baby that's got to go to bed way and way I'm so tired. Then just still buy that ticket and you can watch the show at your leisure after this archived. Sounds exciting to me.

We're going to have a lot of fun stuff and we're going to talk about, that's right, Teen Wolf, as mentioned before. This is the movie that I think is one of the most requested ones for us to do live shows about. And so I think people are going to be a little excited, so excited that things might get a little hairy. Gross. So deal with this. My bags are packed. I have my sights set on Hollywood, but maybe you could help me. Not a great time to travel to L.A. to do. Just want to warn you about that. You can help me stay here in Brooklyn and not abandon my life. By supporting my little bars, my little bar, Hunterlands bar is selling merch and minis

is selling merch. But if you're interested in some merch from Hunterlands, we have T-shirts, hoodies, bandanas. And all you have to do is email hinterlandsbarmerch at gmail.com and we are now offering international shipping options. So if you are not from the United States and want to get your mitts on some of that stuff, you can email me. your mitts on some of that stuff you can email me. And for minis just go to minis Instagram page. Yeah go to the Instagram page for minis bar BK. Be care. Thanks so much this has been the flop house.

I'm Stuart Wellington. I'm Dan McCoy. I'm Elliot Kaylin, see you Saturday February 6th at 9pm Eastern 6pm Pacific for Teen Wolf www.theflophouse.simpletakes.com and also see you wearing a hinterlands and or minis shirt. Buy them both, wear them at the same time. I'm going to be one of them's going to be underneath the others. You're not going to see a clue.

It's cold, yeah, it's cold. People will know that you're wearing it. I've been Elliot Kaylin. Maximumfun.org Comedy and Culture. Maximumfun.org. Comedy and Culture. Artist-owned.

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