The Flop House - FH Mini 45 - Live from Elliott's 40th

Episode Date: December 25, 2021

Merry Christmas to those who celebrate! Here's our gift to you -- a mini recorded LIVE from another special occasion: Elliott's birthday weekend!Before Omicron showed up to shut things down again, Dan... and Stu and fam flew out to Los Angeles, to a beautiful house Elliott's wife had rented for the occasion, to celebrate four decades of that talkative special guy, Elliott Charles Kalan! We talk about growing older and being adults, but with jokes. With cameos from whomever happened to be around for his birthday! 

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Okay. I'm going to nail it right at the start. Okay, it's going to be perfect. Okay. You're already, already. Okay. But you're not less likely. Okay.
Starting point is 00:00:09 Hey! It's me, Stuart Wellington of the Flop House Podcast. You're listening to the Flop House Mini. I'm joined by my co-hosts, Dan McCoy. Hello. And Elliot Kalen. That's me. And we have something special planned.
Starting point is 00:00:25 We're all out here in Cali. I would say plan. I would say plan. It's just, it's sprung on Elliot. Exaggerating to the point of untrue, yeah. The thing is, we couldn't plan it because that's right. We're here for Elliot's surprise 40th birthday party. I didn't even know I was turning 40.
Starting point is 00:00:41 Yeah, yeah, we tricked you. We have slowly been gaslighting you. By slowly, I mean, your entire life, we have been telling you that your birthday is years back. Yeah. To find out that I'm actually much younger than I am, was really great, yeah. Yeah, you saw you were turning 47?
Starting point is 00:00:57 Yeah, 47, yeah. Stuart also decided to surprise Elliot with a treat, making him work at his birthday party, I think. Let's bring some microphones. Well, there's a thing. Well, there's a thing. Well, there's a thing.
Starting point is 00:01:09 Well, there's a thing. Well, there's a thing. Well, there's a thing. Well, there's a thing. Well, there's a thing. Well, there's a thing. Well, there's a thing. Well, there's a thing.
Starting point is 00:01:17 Well, there's a thing. Well, there's a thing. Well, there's a thing. Well, there's a thing. Well, there's a thing. Well, there's a thing. Well, there's a thing. Well, there's a thing. Well, there's a thing. Well, there's a thing. Well, there's a thing. Well, there's a long game poly. This is a joke, sir. It has been workshopping quite a bit over the weekend. It is.
Starting point is 00:01:26 By workshopping, I mean, repeating. And that was a more polished version. Yeah, more polished. And I'm carefully watching your faces to gauge the reaction to see if it's getting better or worse over time. On the first time. You notes? I'm pretended like it was causing me to have a stroke. Yeah, blood
Starting point is 00:01:46 started trickling out of one of your nostrils. Yeah. So yeah, so this is Elliot's birthday. I'm really happy that we flew out to spend this with you. One of the reasons we're podcasting is because I love podcasting with my friend Elliot. And that's what this weekend's all about. Yeah, this is this is something that my wife, Mastermind, did not the podcast recording, but we are all together. It was a surprise to me. I knew that we were, I was going somewhere
Starting point is 00:02:14 from my 40th birthday. I didn't know I was going to this beautiful location we're in now. And that my friends were flying in from New York City. That's right, let me hear it. New York. Woo-hoo! Yeah, let me describe the loc local that we're in right now like uh... we're like professional pot
Starting point is 00:02:30 cyberspace yeah there's a way to get special guest algae rhythm is here uh... we're in a uh... beautiful sort of uh... air being being the mountains we're on the to penga canions were actually kind of on the side of a canyon wall. Yeah, and we're on a deck, you know, part way down a canyon wall with a giant Buddha statue. Looming over us. Followers of steward on social media will be familiar with the number of Buddhas at this house. Oh, man, if you count them all and send in to the flop house care of Dan McCoy, he will send you your prize. Okay. Dan gets prize.
Starting point is 00:03:10 And everyone's spider rings that I bought in bulk. And the notice that Stewart didn't say there's one winner. Anyone who counts and sends it gets prize. Yeah, that's the problem with that. For all of the turkey, I think that noting the the number of videos a little easy for It's not like one of those those jars filled with pennies and you're like how many pennies are in there if you get it You get all the pennies. I'd also like to say that He's sitting in a way that I would say is a reminiscent of a time cop
Starting point is 00:03:43 Where his legs are slayed wide open, but let's see wearing Dan wearing a tiny I guess that's a speedo It's a bathing suit. It's a well, it's a high cut His legs being almost is that his legs being almost one degree. From now on, a bolt-thrower. With a leg bolt-thrower, he sure are the minion out of it. With the minion holding a gun and giving a middle finger. Because he's the war master, he's a badass.
Starting point is 00:04:13 Now, from now on, when I- I also pink sunglasses. Yeah, my credit from now on, whenever I'm on a podcast. Not this one, is provocateur. Like the fact that this morning's tour was wearing this this bolt-thrower bootleg shirt and sweater and multicolored sweatpants. He said I'm going to go take a shower. He came back wearing the same outfit with the cardigan and more chains.
Starting point is 00:04:35 And he did not change his pants, but he changed it to the clean pair of sunglasses. I mean it does give us a nice view of his new beholder tattoo and his upper thigh. Yeah. Well that's me, you know. But that's not what today is about. Today is about Elliot's 40th birthday. And my birthday podcast would be mostly about Stuart's clothing and good life choices. Now, Elliot, we are here at the Flop-Ostool a lot of stuff where we talk about movies.
Starting point is 00:05:02 Not normally today. Today, we're normally talking about booties and steward. But, but we, today we're, that's the boot of steward. I think steward is the best. Steward will work, Stu, but then you feel that you don't have a web steward, which is amazing, he's great.
Starting point is 00:05:17 He's great, yeah, he's a chair shactor. Now, what have, now that you're turning 40, what have movies taught you about the looming age of 40 so that's a good question middle eight and i this is gonna be a very off the country is your time at eight it's a lot i did i did have a conversation with my mother the other day where she i said i'm not young anymore she said no you're still young and i said i am uh... this is exactly middle-aged like i'll probably die in my eighties
Starting point is 00:05:42 maybe i'll make it my nin 90s, or with medical technology. My, no, my son is planning to live in his thousands. Oh wow. He was like, he's like, I hope I make it to triple digits and then quadruple digits. And I was like, well, no one has ever done that. Yeah, I'm not sure that the singularity
Starting point is 00:05:54 is gonna be reached by the time. I like the chilling, the like chilling tone in his voice, where he's like, I'm living forever, daddy. Mm-hmm, that once I learn how to absorb life force. No matter the cost. But so, the movies have taught me that 40 is, I mean growing up 40 was just considered old. It was just when you were 40, you were old, you were essentially, you might as well be
Starting point is 00:06:16 a, you might as well be 70 when you're 40. And I found that my life experience is, if anything the exact opposite that, that where it's, I feel that movies will teach you that at 40s when men are like, what did I do with my life? Like, why am I not in my 20s? I got to change everything and get back to, I've got to erase all the progress I've made in my life and go back to being a dumb kid.
Starting point is 00:06:38 And I feel like I don't want to do that. That's an overwhelming urge that I think I know Dana and I feel. So it's nice to know that you don't feel that way. It's very strange. I remember walking down when I was living in Germany in my early 20s. I remember walking down the street and passing a head shop, which were plentiful at the time and seeing in the window. That's where you would get eight heads, put them in a duffel bag, take home.
Starting point is 00:06:58 And I remember looking in the window and they had all these novelty t-shirts that you would get somebody for their birthday. And they had different ages on them. And my favorite one was the one that said, I've been fiat-seek-yar out. Un fuela mich cool, man. Which man is, I'm 40 years old, and I feel cool, man. And I'm like, if I turn 40, kill me.
Starting point is 00:07:20 That is the most German novelty shirt. Like, there's no real joke to it. It's just like an attitude, you know? Yeah, exactly. I mean, the idea that anybody would feel cool, it's fun, it's joking now. Yeah, yeah. But yeah, how is, wait, hold on.
Starting point is 00:07:35 So if you didn't feel that way, how did your midlife crisis manifest itself, Elliot? Because this is an interesting, I haven't had one yet. I'm waiting for you to kick in but I find that I mean This is not going to be the most interesting answer to a part of the Curez gambling do you think what the thing is that like I know the bet people people want to hear is Confessions of of misdeeds or like unhappiness and that's what a lot of podcasting is but like I'm I have been thinking about this a lot in the year
Starting point is 00:07:58 Completing up to this because it was not a surprise. I was turning 40. I did the math and when I was 39 I was like wait a minute. what comes next? No, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, but I think about, I'm pretty much exactly in my life where I would want to be at age 40. And like, I have, I love my wife, and I wanna be with her forever. I have two kids that I love, who, and I don't want more kids than that.
Starting point is 00:08:20 And we have a nice house that we live in. I've been able to support my family writing jokes for dogs. Like, so I'm living a number of jobs. The act is playing, just playing dogs. Let's make it clear. You aren't a fact list for like, classy. Yeah, you're not dragging the performers. No, no, no, not at all.
Starting point is 00:08:41 They're playing animals. So what you're saying is that it's only down from here. So you're setting yourself up for a fall. I mean, that's one way to put it. I prefer to the inevitable revenge redemption arc that you're going to have. Yeah, sure. Yeah, sure. Now, it's more like the... You took this dog show away from me and now you have to pay.
Starting point is 00:08:59 No, but it's going to be like pig and I'm just going to make you an amazing meal. Oh my god. Oh, if only pig, watch it, best movie of the year. I don't know about that. Well, it's really good, I don't know about that, but I didn't see that many movies this year. The, what was I gonna say? No, I feel like each decade of my life has been better than the previous one.
Starting point is 00:09:16 I did not like being a child. I did not like being my teen, my teens were the worst. That was, I didn't like that at all. And my 20s were fine and my 30s were better. And now I'm excited about my 40s, but what movies would taught me is that, is that once you get to 40, you might, you either have to restart,
Starting point is 00:09:32 like you're the DC fucking universe and just reboot everything. Or you just keep, or you're just like, getting ready to be old, you know. I mean, I actually think that that's pretty close to true for me as well, but I, I, that didn't, that didn't stop me from having a lot of emotional pain that I then needed to be like, oh, okay, wait, hold on.
Starting point is 00:09:52 My problem, I need to figure out these emotions that are inside me and where to put them and what to do to deal with them. That was a thing I wasn't taught for some reason. Seems important. Yeah, but you were taught how to do a lot about the periodic table, right? I was taught it, but I forgot it.
Starting point is 00:10:13 Oh, boy, I see even that. Oh my God, we brought you along for the chemistry day. No, no. Yeah, no, I'm the same way. I feel like other than having to reconcile 40-year-old steward with the 30-year-old steward, 20-year-old steward,-year-old Stewart and 10-year-old Stewart, they're all living inside my brain at all times. Like Herman said, yeah. Exactly. And you know, it's just as funny. Hopefully it doesn't get canceled soon. I mean, Herman's had ran for at least two
Starting point is 00:10:36 seasons, right? That's right. Oh, no, it's okay. I just spilled coffee on the hopefully there's no one beneath this deck. The news that Herman's had ran more than one season was so shocking. I'm scared that he spills his coffee all over. Everything's working. Are we are we have like, but he's like, but how could, how could one one be on the Simpsons and Herman's head in the same night for more than a season? Yeah, destroy a mortal human. Yeah, yeah. What is this gym carry in the 90s? She has to draw those pictures of Lisa. Yes. I don't think Dan, Dan, I gotta explain how it's done.
Starting point is 00:11:08 I feel like we're having, like, we came here and we sat in front of a Buddha. And suddenly we're having an emotional encounter group. Well, this is, I mean, this is a very, this is the other thing you do in movies when you're 40, which is that you do like big chill type stuff. I guess they're in their 30s in the big chill, right? But like, that's when you're like,
Starting point is 00:11:24 that's the oldest hell when I used to look at the big chill poster that was on my parents' basement wall all the time while I was growing up. Yeah, I mean, well, they are particular. I still never seen it. I feel like our parents were particularly old 30, although actually our grandparents' generation when you were into 30s, you were already, you were, you might as well have been in your 50s. But there's, that is, that's the thing you do, you might as well have been in your 50s. But the, but there's, that, that is, that's, feel like that's the thing you do.
Starting point is 00:11:47 So you get together with your friends and like, talk about your life and like, what's going on? And we've been, you know, what you hope to do. I was early, luckily we do that every two weeks. Yeah, that's true. So we don't have to do that right now here, guys. But the earlier in the day, my friend Brock Mayhan, who's also here with us, hoped he would be a special guest,
Starting point is 00:12:05 but he saw this microphone's coming out and immediately booked it for some of the place to be. They'd like to leave a, a Brock shaped clotted dust. He and I went to college together and we did briefly talk about which of our college classmates we still keep in touch with. And I was like, this is the kind of thing people in their 40s do.
Starting point is 00:12:20 Yeah, they reminisce about who they keep in touch with from college. Because otherwise, most of our talk, so far this weekend has been about like the same stuff We don't have the podcast just like movies and dumb stuff. Yeah, like oh, it's really misty out I guess we're gonna talk about the fog yeah, we talked about heavy love you for a while earlier for some reason Dan was like I don't think you should be canceled. He's okay He's got a big heart. This game that we've got.
Starting point is 00:12:47 I think it's a crime to love him. We try and get in trouble. No, we all agree that he's not a good character. And not just problematic, but just a dumb bad. It was it was funny. Uh, also, Ellie, it's brother David, the famous David last name with held. Kalen was here. You're briefly.
Starting point is 00:13:02 And I told him earlier what a pleasure was because i realized like i'm the youngest and i had never had to in my family and i'm the family i'm the youngest brother children of the last one born so he's famous now and so i never had the pleasure of like bullying like a younger sibling or a friend of the younger sibling
Starting point is 00:13:24 but with david around we could all gang up against him rather than the usual Which is you two getting up against me? Yeah, I'm glad that you that was like a fantasy camp for you for a little bit Well, it's also because David has a tendency to just like throw himself into the conversation and I'm like, oh He's gonna talk about fucking cinnamon. He was talking about how much he loved cinnamon as a spice about fucking cinnamon. He was talking about how much he loved cinnamon as a spice. I think that's the kind of personal information. He does not just reveal this. Yes, sir. You can watch my fucking hair turn wiker as he kept talking. But it's also something I've known him for 36 years. This was news to me that he was such a big fan of cinnamon. I was like, like, so I'm still learning things about my family members. This is great.
Starting point is 00:14:02 I'm still learning things about my family members. This is great. This week on tights and fights, Austin Creed, better known as WWE Superstar, Xavier Woods, unbalancing his many passions. This dude actually wants these ridiculous things he wants to wear crown. He wants to be a G4. He wants to have a yacht rock band. Like he wants to DJ at a festival one day. WWE and G4's Austin Creed, I'm tights and vibes.
Starting point is 00:14:31 Find it on Maximum Fun or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello, I'm Marley Smirl, I'm Sydney McAroy, and I'm Taylor Smirl. And we host Still Buffering, a cross-generational guide to the culture that made us. Every week, we share media that made us who we are, things like Archie Comics, Sailor Moon, and lots of Taylor Swift. And now that Riley's an adult, it comes with a hundred percent more butts. And now I am totally comfortable with it. So check out new episodes of Still Buffering every Thursday on MaximumFun.org.
Starting point is 00:15:07 Let's get back to something about movies. So people are totally upset by this. What are things about, what did movies teach you about growing up and being grown-ups, basically? I mean, because movies do teach you that growing up is bad. You look at a movie like hook and that's just one movie. But the message of that movie is like, this man shouldn't put any time into his job. He should be a kid who gets into food fights. I think I'm plagiarizing a mutual friend, Matt Bird, when I say that I feel like a movie like Highlander taught me that part of growing up is going to wrestling
Starting point is 00:15:53 shows by yourself and then going to live in the antique shop that you own and live above. Yeah. Well, the movie, this is 40 taught me that when I was 40, I would have no real problems, but I would make like a two plus hour movie about it. It would be a lot of you just like goofing around. Yeah. But it's true, movies did teach me, I mean, there's a book out called Never Can Say Goodbye where I have an essay about this, that movies taught me what life was like as a grown-up
Starting point is 00:16:21 and specifically like what it was like to live as a grown up in New York. And that the one of the most exciting parts of ghost busters for me as a kid was Dana coming home with her groceries in her apartment and just being like, she has her own apartment. And it's like there's all these people around her. So she's not lonely, but like she could just close the door
Starting point is 00:16:37 and put her groceries away. Like that's what a grown up does. And I can only buy two bags of groceries because I have to be able to carry them. I remember there was in my early 20s, there was a brief period of time after my girlfriend broke up with me and moved away before I got to know it's okay. I mean, hey, I'm better off for it obviously. And I was in the apartment by myself before my new roommate moved in, so I had a few days.
Starting point is 00:17:00 And it was like the first time I had an entire apartment just for me. And it was like, it was exactly the same entire apartment just for me. And it was like, it was, it was exactly the same thing where I'm like, whoa, I can do whatever I want. Yeah. This is mine. I mean, not mine, it was the landlord's and no, but I understand you. You were renting that space. But yeah, so what I'm trying to think what else movies taught me about growing up, but that's, there's almost, there's very few movies that I feel like are about like growing up and being like, yeah, I'm glad I grew up which is the way I feel. Like I'm very, I like me an adult much more than I like being a kid. I assumed I was gonna wear suits all the time and that I would have a lot of opinions about cars and the market
Starting point is 00:17:38 and things like that and I don't. I'm trying to think like- I'm sorry. No, I mean, I have a lot of worries just like in the form of just sort of free floating anxiety, but I'm realizing that like I don't I rarely have like these conceptions of the future like I'm just like I don't know I like I float through life in an eternal present. I mean, but that's pretty nice. I mean, that's I mean, if anyone would agree with you, it's agree with that.
Starting point is 00:18:03 It's the Buddha right here. Yeah, it's enormous. It Buddha that's looking down on us. Is he smiling? I don't know if I can tell. Very cryptic. He's the son. He's the Mona Buddha. Just to get a little context. I would say maybe like two of us would, special guest that rule of us, being a boot up sitting on shoulders being boot up get back
Starting point is 00:18:29 that's the well good yeah can't rooster gets picked up on the yeah you can hear there's farm animals in the distance constant
Starting point is 00:18:38 that's the to pangle rooster grow yeah so i mean i'd rather that grow then some some ghost that came back for a fact that's true. Oh, I mean, he is really cool looking. I will say that, yeah, it's true. I will say growing older is made a little easy by the fact that my generation has decided
Starting point is 00:18:55 as a group that we will never let go of the things that we like to children. And so the stuff I liked as a kid still is the dominant pop culture. If anything more so than it used to when I was a kid, the dominant paradigm. No, that's like, especially with the podcast, with the pandemic, gee, I'm like, equating a wonderful thing and a terrible thing. Yeah, this pandemic has been great.
Starting point is 00:19:15 This podcast is a chore. With the pandemic, like, even more so than normal, I feel like I've been taking refuge in the most nostalgic, like pop culture, you know, like. If I just want to comfort myself, I find myself looking for something from my youth that I maybe haven't caught yet or something that recaptures the vibe of when I was young. And so much of my time is like spent obsessing over that and then getting disgusted at myself for a little bit of time. You're still being in that way.
Starting point is 00:19:47 Well, but at this point, the way culture is and there's a lot of bad about it and there, you know, I've been reading a lot lately about algorithms and cultural stagnation and nostalgia stagnation. Not just about our understand motivations of algae, rhythm and space. I mean, that's how I got into it. I was like, I want to know more about this guy. Where'd he come from? But that it's hard for me to go a day without seeing a picture of Spider-Man, that's how I got into it. I was like, I wanna know more about this guy. Where'd he come from? But it's hard for me to go a day without
Starting point is 00:20:07 seeing a picture of Spider-Man, and that's not in my house. That's outside in the world. There's just Spider-Man everywhere. And the fact that I go to work, and my co-workers are like, Elliot, can you explain this thing about Dune to us? And I'm like, dude, I make a wish on a monkey's heart.
Starting point is 00:20:21 Like this is my dream, but at the same time, it's a little bit of a curse. Yeah, it definitely feels like, it's similar to like growing up, there's the feeling like nerds were the stepped on class. And now that is clearly not the case. Now nerds are the bully class.
Starting point is 00:20:34 I mean, nerds as human as individuals, I'm sure are still stepped on. Yeah, yeah. But that nerd culture is now the bully culture that is hitting the rest of the world and saying why you hit yourself. But it's just a, it makes me wonder about, so in my dad, I remember very well when my dad turned 40.
Starting point is 00:20:53 And it was like a big event. And it was very, like, it seemed very strange. And he, you know, was very like, oh, I can't play my 40, dah, dah, dah, dah. And I would ask him questions about the stuff I'm interested in and he would not know it. He would tell me all the stuff he was interested and I wouldn't understand it.
Starting point is 00:21:06 But now the stuff I'm interested in. Mealy Steely Dan, right? Well, I mean, with my dad, it was the Beatles were up top. And then a step below them was Bruce Springsteen and Billy Joel. Okay. And then a step below that was Final Countdown by Europe. No other songs by Europe, just Final Countdown. And then there's kind of floating cycle of,
Starting point is 00:21:26 that you would go through of Jethro Tall and Queen and Stix. Like that was, so my dad was never really just stealing Dan, but it was associated things. Yeah. He was way ahead of a curve on Queen. I remember when Wayne's world came out and everybody was suddenly into a hemiin rap city. I was like, you mean my dad's song?
Starting point is 00:21:42 That was the thing too, that my dad's always playing. But I feel like now, the things I'm like, you mean my dad's song? That was the thing too, that my dad's always playing. But I feel like now, the things I'm into, many of them are the same as the things my children are into. And so it's being 40, it doesn't feel as separate and farther from youth, because it's not like they're talking about, they're not yet old enough to be talking about music acts that I've never heard of. So when they're teenagers, then I'll feel really old.
Starting point is 00:22:04 But I mean, my 50s by then I will be old. I mean I guess I was gonna be my follow-up is looking forward 10 years what do you what do you expect your 50th birthday to look like? I think we'll go a little something like this. Can you guys see the fantasy in my mind? Uh huh. Okay. Oh. okay. Yep. Oh. Oh. No, I mean, I imagine my life will be, I mean, one thing that would be different
Starting point is 00:22:31 from my past birthdays is I own my own home now. So I'm not going anywhere. So in 10 years, my setting will be the same. But I think, you know, I'll just have older kids and hopefully I'll have moved higher in my career, but other than that, it'll probably be the same. Probably podcasting again. I mean, every year, I'm like, we're still doing this podcast.
Starting point is 00:22:51 How long are we gonna go with this? And no one's told us to stop. So I can tell you guys, I was doing it. I know it's happening. Maybe reason we are still doing it. This is nobody, like nobody has told us to stop doing it. And we're like, okay, I guess we're gonna meet every two weeks.
Starting point is 00:23:02 Yeah, I mean, it's one of those, I- Please don't tell us to stop doing this by the like, okay, I guess we're going to meet every two weeks. Yeah, I mean, it's that one of those please don't tell us to stop doing this by the like, I can't on the income for currently. Yeah, just to eat at us with the hashtag stop. Don't tell us. I mean, I guess if I wanted to see somebody telling me to stop doing it, I'd just go to like, Reddit or some stuff. Yeah, I think the, I think that one of the, I haven't listened to old episodes of this
Starting point is 00:23:21 podcast in a while. I don't recommend people necessarily going back and doing that. But like, one of the things that I always loved about old movies is that because they were old, I could see the performers aging. I didn't have to wait. I'm not going to, I'm not going to, by the time Timothy Shalam is an old man, I'll be dead. So I'm not going to see what that's like. Is he going to look kind of weird the way that Leonardo Caprio looks kind of weird? I mean, Leonardo Caprio just looks like a man who is aged and got a little brown fur.
Starting point is 00:23:43 I don't know if he's that weird. No, but I mean, I don't know. He looks like a man who is aged and got a little round there. I don't know if he's that weird. No, but I mean, like, I don't know. He looks like a man who is this age. Lena or Ecaprio, who I like as an actor in many things, but I feel like. But you don't even have more as a celebrity poker. But no, but. No, but I, well, like, I feel like if he had not been a star when he was younger, I
Starting point is 00:24:01 don't know if he would have been picked to be a star now. I don't know that he would be a movie opening star, but he had not been a beautiful young man that people took to, but he would still be a very well respected and employed actor. You know, he's great. He's great. He reminds me of not quite the exact same, but a little bit like Colin Farrell, where it was like the older he gets and the less people are distracted by his looks, the better he gets to, the more it's the things he gets to do as an actor. Yeah, absolutely. You know, but then like you look at somebody like George Clooney, he didn't really become
Starting point is 00:24:33 famous, famous until he was already in his middle age. Yeah, almost middle age, yeah. But he had been acting, you know, on baby talk in fact, life, return of the killer tomatoes and grizzly, right? Or pauses and that. Yeah, there's the and in fact life, return of the killer to Matoes. And Grizzly, right? Or Paul season that. Yeah, Grizzly two. And in the TV midi series of Centennial, I think he plays a guy carrying a barrel at one point.
Starting point is 00:24:54 Wow, is that his credit or is that just your description? No, I think the credit is main character. I lost the thread. Was there a question originally that we got? No, Leonardo DiCaprio. I think Stuart was trying to rag on Leonardo Carefree, right? Yeah, well, I'm trying to nag Leo, so he calls me up.
Starting point is 00:25:08 He's like, who, you want to come hang out on my yacht? I'm like, I don't know. This seems creepy. Which I'm still nagging, and that's the thing. It's a long game. But I was saying that it's a very long game. I was saying that one thing that's interesting to me, if I ever go back and let's do it,
Starting point is 00:25:23 is that this podcast has been such a document of how our lives have changed since we were in our 20s. And that's something that, again, it's more interesting to me as a concept that exists in the world that is something I actually want to go back and experience. For the future documentaries that we've made about for a flat back, they don't have all this rich,
Starting point is 00:25:42 modified, and the brain of Peter Jackson in a robot body that cuts all the footage together. It's just lots of conversations and things. And I'll be still complaining that the brain of Peter Jackson and robot body isn't making homemade zombie movies and only makes big movies. I mean, but if he started doing a so meriline movie, you'd be excited, right?
Starting point is 00:26:02 Yeah, always, because I can't help it. So speaking of being your 40s my uh... lake are both uh... totally asleep from sitting crisscross applesauce yeah on this thing where we're gonna get people to wish a happy birthday or so what we're gonna do is we're gonna say thank you for listening everybody uh... thank you for the 40 years of following LA. K-Lin, what are they following me since I was born? So there might be a way, so this is, so there might be a, this is something I think I have on.
Starting point is 00:26:35 Just roll over and line your tummy. I think I have on video somewhere but I'm not sure when I had my, when I had, I still like partially, yeah. When I had my, when I turned 25 and I did a comedy show that was celebrating 25 years of Kaelin and John Oliver came and delivered a eulogy. And so I had a thing that was like, what, what, what was like, let me see what happened in the 25 years I was alive.
Starting point is 00:26:55 And I'd cut together a montage of like new Coke and ET or whatever. And then it was like, it was like Jesse Owen's winning at the 36 Olympics. And then, and then it ended with, with my name in the date's 1981-2006. And then John Oliver came up and delivered a eulogy for me. And I was like, but I'm not dead. And he was like, don't make this any harder than it already is.
Starting point is 00:27:16 But this is where this reminds me of. So let's wish Elliot a happy birthday, everybody. Happy birthday. Happy birthday. Dan is totally lying down on his back now. Happy birthday. Happy birthday. Dan is totally lying down on his vagna. Happy birthday. Where are they coming down? Hopefully the mics pick that up.
Starting point is 00:27:33 Well, I mean, they're walking over now slowly. I'll paint a word picture. We're still in this deck. Someone's, now the significant others of two of the hosts are arriving. Yeah, just take the microphone from Dan who is up, that one's not plugged in. I mean, yeah, you might want just take the microphone from Dan, who is up. That one's not plugged in.
Starting point is 00:27:46 I mean, yeah, you might want to take that mic from Dan so he doesn't choke on it. The mic from me. This is Audrey. Hello, Audrey. Hi, everybody. Hi, Elliott. Happy birthday.
Starting point is 00:27:56 Oh, thanks. Charlie, you're all welcome. Happy birthday, Elliott. Thank you to you and your wife for inviting us to this beautiful house and letting us spend your 40th birthday with you. Oh no problem. My pleasure. I like how this went from a podcast to just like the video that you watch from your wedding. I'm not your guest. Hey, happy birthday, Elliott. I'm honored to be here.
Starting point is 00:28:17 I'm, uh, is really nice listening to this mini get taped. As you tried to relax below us on a different deck. Yeah, I was a chill on you now you hit Buddha Langing Buddha's got a Puddle of a Curric coffee on the mystical sphere should be they do say they do say when you meet the Buddha on the road, pork off, you know. I'm really happy that we can spend this time celebrating. Oh, thank you. For years of Elliot Gale. It's especially special not to throw shade on any of you guys, especially here from Brock,
Starting point is 00:28:56 who is I've known longer than anyone else here. I mean, now that my brother's not with us, because he left. Why are you looking directly at me while you face it? Because he's sitting behind me. I can't do anything about not knowing you sooner, Elliot, I'm sorry. Yeah, yeah, thanks. But the Brock is my, I think, third oldest friend
Starting point is 00:29:12 that I'm still in touch with. Pretty soon. If you work a little harder, you can get to number two. Just go after my college roommate, Brian, and he's number two. Number one, you're never going to be involved. I know, we'll have to take out. Yeah, that's the right Elliott. So just for our research.
Starting point is 00:29:28 Oh boy, okay, well there's, but yeah, so I've been, that I've known you guys for a long, long time. I've known you guys for what, almost 20 years, 16 or so years, 17 years. Yeah, I mean, and I've known Brock for 20 years or 22 years. So yeah, that's right. So it's great to be with people that I care so much about. And I know so much, and I've known for so long
Starting point is 00:29:53 and feel so close to my wife, of course, is somewhere else right now. I would have included her in that certainly, you know. But I haven't known her as long as I've known you guys. So from us to you, thank you so much for listening. This is a product of maximum fun. Don't hold them accountable. Thank you to Alexander Smith for probably putting a little bit of editing juice on this.
Starting point is 00:30:13 But Alex, whenever it's getting too slow or too real, just put up. Yeah. Slap a little juice. Yeah. Yes, I think this is Stuart. Is this just so you can write off this trick? I mean, you can do it now, especially. Sign off, sign off. Okay, bye. Maximumfund.org. Comedy and culture.
Starting point is 00:30:42 Artists-owned, audience supported. fun.org. Comedy and culture. Artist-owned, audience supported.

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