The Flop House - FH Mini 51 - Talkin' Toys with T'Elliott
Episode Date: March 19, 2022In honor of our Masters of the Universe streaming show (tonight, 3/19 - tickets still available now & for another week!) Elliott takes us on a very silly tour through some of his favorite movie toy ti...e-ins.Thank you to our sponsor — microdose gummies from Lumi Labs.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hello everybody.
Welcome to another flop house mini.
That's right.
It's the flop house, but not at the maxi size.
It's the mini size with wings.
And tonight we wanted to do a special mini.
This way, it's driving it.
To help promote and endorse our flop house virtual live show, which is happening this
evening.
If you're listening to this on the day of its release, which is Saturday, March 19th,
then today you can watch our Flop House Live Virtual Show
where we talk about Masters of the Universe.
It starts at 9 PM Eastern, 6 PM Pacific,
to get tickets, you just go to theflophouse.simpletext.com.
Now, if you're listening to this a couple days after release,
you miss the show, I'm sorry to say,
but you can still buy a ticket and download the recording of the show. You have one week to do that.
After that week, the show will disappear forever and no one will ever see it again. We've
got new presentations from us. Dan has some kind of surprise thing that he's not going
to tell us what it is. Stu says, yes, surprise. Yeah. I'm just going to be there.
And I'm taking bets. Elliot and I have been taking bets, but I think Dan's going to show whole. What?
I didn't.
I'm betting no, but Stuart's been betting yes.
So that's the, if you want to see if Dan shows whole, that's the flop house dot symbol
six dot com today.
That's that's up to you, Dan.
And so in order to, in order to get people in the mood for a movie like mess, no, not
for you, not for your whole Dan or whole.
Thank God, because it's not happening.
No, in order to get people in the mood
from Masters of the Universe, a movie based on a toy line,
I thought today we'd take a look at toys based on movies.
That's right, it's time for Elliot Kalins
once every 35 years, 10 best movie related action figures.
That's right, I did one when I was five years old, 35 years ago, and I'll do one again in the future
when I'm 75 years old.
It's a 35 year thing like Haley's comment.
If it, Haley's comment came around 35 years instead of whatever it is, 70 something.
So today Dan Stu, once you come with me on a little walk down toy memory lane as we
look at Elliott's choices for the top 10 best movie related action figures.
Now, and these are, now again, these are toy lines based on movies. These are not toys that
were adapted into movies. So there's no Ninja Turtles on this list. There's no Thundercatses.
There's no Transformers is any of that stuff. So, wait a minute. They make a Thundercats movie.
Well, they've been talking about making one for a long time. You know,
what about the Thunder Birds movie? I know that. But that's not the same thing. No, different.
They wait. They made of the birds movie. Yeah, they made of the birds movie. It's called the birds.
It's based on the coin. It's based on the movie of the same name.
based on the movie of the same name. So the movie is based on the movie of the same name.
Yeah.
Okay, interesting.
Not him.
It's the Alfred Chuck was really eating his own tail on that one.
So which was good because he didn't want people to know he had a tail.
So there's the only way to get rid of it back then.
They didn't have the surgery.
To eat it right off.
Like turning red.
I sent you guys a packet of photos.
So feel free to go to the first page of that packet. Please
don't look ahead to the later pictures. And you should be seeing number 10, Dan Stewart,
can you describe what you're seeing here? Well, it is a grim one. Yeah. I will say that much.
It looks like Mohawk. It's Stripe. Stripe.
Oh, sorry.
Mohawk is the later one.
I could remember.
They both have Mohawks is the confusing thing.
Mohawks is more of a spikey thing.
Oh, a spikey Mohawk.
Stripe has white hair because he's like silver fox.
Yeah, you're right.
It is Stripe.
It is Stripe.
It is Stripe.
It is Stripe.
It is Stripe.
It is Stripe.
It is Stripe.
It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It is Stripe. It to describe him. I love it. He's like coyote. He looks a little bit out of shape. I guess that's kind of a pun because
he's literally a plastic thing that has been kind of bent around. I mean, Grimmlands are
like twisted creatures. Yeah, and this one is literally twisted. So this is the Grimmlands
rubber figure from 1984. This is a toy I had and I loved very much. As you can see from the picture,
he's kind of doing kind of a shimmy Charleston type day.
They were very hard to get to stand up properly.
And the best this person could do
was bend the knees inward and have the hands kind of like off
to the side as if he's dancing.
So this is my number 10 pick for the best movie related toys.
It was a bendy stripe.
It looked great.
It felt rubbery like you imagine real Gremlins skin skin would feel and adding to the excitement of it was the fact that I played
with it so much that the metal wires inside that held its shape started poking out through the
rubber skin and it became dangerous. Yeah, exactly. So just like the real stripe, it was very dangerous
to play with. Watch out everybody and I'll see see you shouldn't get it wet because it would not dry. It would just smell. Yeah, that's a good point. Do you ever try feeding
that shit after midnight? I mean, it was pointless. He's a Gremlin already. But what happens?
What happens if you feed a Gremlin after midnight? Does it become a super Gremlin? It does
become, I have to assume he comes to super Gremlin or it goes back and becomes a mogwai.
I know I never tried it before. Whoa. So that's the Gremlin's figure.
Do you guys have any Gremlin's toy memories?
I don't have any Gremlin's toy memories.
A couple of years back, I think it was our first Christmas together as a, you know, partnered
in anyway.
Audrey got me a Gremlin figure that has, it's from the original movie and it's got a lot of the
movie theater, you know, Kutramon, like it has a full three glasses and a beer and a cigarette
and popcorn bags you can put on the ears. It's a nice little, I've lost at least two of
the smaller items that came along with it already, but I am very
fine with my Grimmons figure. What about you, Stu?
Yeah, so just like you guys, I love Grimmons 2. And when Grimmons 2 came out, there was
a, I think, tops put out a series of trading cards, and I obsessively collected them. At
the time, I probably should have identified this as a signifier
of upcoming addictive obsession habits. And I should have nipped it in the bud, unfortunately,
I did not. Yeah. And then at the same time, I was playing the Nintendo game, Gremlins 2,
which was based on the movie. And that was the first Nintendo game based on the birds.
Yeah, I think that was the first Nintendo game that I beat.
And I remember taking a picture of the end game screen that couldn't have been the first
game I beat.
Ducktail is the first game I beat.
But I feel like Grumlin's too was a game that I beat.
And I'm like, hell, yeah.
So I took a picture and I sent that chin and Nintendo power did not hear back from
them.
Oh, they're lost.
That was a fun game.
I look, no shades too.
A little bit of an easy game, but a very fun game.
Well, why do you think they didn't print it in Nintendo Power?
You sent it in a Nestor opened up the envelope
and was like, this easy stuff?
Not magazine, were they?
You know what I just remembered that I had
that I really loved was I don't, I think it was like
some sort of
fast food tie-in maybe I had a series of
records that told the story of Grimlands. Yes, yeah, I had those also. Yeah, and they were there was a lot of story books that that told it. There was one called what Billy's new pet or
something like that. Anyway, I had a lot of Grimlands toys as a kid. A lot of them are still at my mom's
apartment. We had so many gizmos, but this one I think has disappeared, which is good because
it was. Why was he the one?
I was the one who never striped. We had gizmos up the wazoo. Anyway, so let's move on to the
next one. Don't scroll to where I just go to the next page. Just go to the next page.
Oh, okay. So now we're going to number nine. This is Showtime
Beetlejuice from 1989. Dan, can you describe this toy? This is a puzzle. It'll fall out.
Yeah. So imagine in Beetlejuice where he says it's Showtime. That is what makes this showtime Beetlejuice because he's got the, you know, like the carousel
head hat kind of thing with like bat wings around. He doesn't have the long hammer arms,
mallet arms that he does have at that point in the thing, but they have tossed in on the side
a banister Beetlejuice snake, you know, the snake with the beetles
use head, although it is really tiny.
It looks like kind of a, it's smaller than his arm.
Yeah, it's made, it's made kind of attached to his arm.
And here, according to the packaging, it's called a rotten rattler.
And so the reason I concluded this was, this was my first experience with Beetlejuice was seeing this toy at a friend's house
and having no idea what it could possibly be.
That it does not look like a Beetlejuice character.
Very much like the sculpt does not look like my face.
I'm sure you were able to easily extrapolate
what the plot of the movie was.
That was like, okay, this guy has a carnival for a head.
He's probably a ghost.
He's probably a ghost. He's probably a ghost. He's probably a couple that die in the next.
It was amazing. I feel like my first experience of Beeljuice was this toy, then the Beeljuice
cartoon. And only many years later, the movie. So for years, I thought that Beeljuice was the star
of the movie, Beeljuice, and didn't realize that if anything, he's the villain of the movie.
But yeah, this was, I always thought it was a strange choice to make your Beetlejuice
figure from one moment in the movie when his head is misshapen and he's turned into something
else.
We have to talk about that in the upper right corner of the packaging, we have a Beetlejuice
who has, you know, again, he's got human legs and arms and hands or at least Beetlejuice
human legs, arms and hands, but his face is sort
of the snake beetle juice.
Yeah, it's got like a snake head like he's one of the bad guys.
Yeah, there's a little word on what's that?
What's the word balloon say, dude?
The word balloon says, can I be scary or what?
And then above that, you'll notice it says ages four and up, which seems wildly inappropriate.
Yeah, very.
Very loyal playing with this.
Very optimistic.
There's something and there's a, and I'm going to touch on this actually in the Human Live show is the inappropriateness in the 1980s of what materials redeemed
licenseable for children's merchandise. It was just like anything goes and it doesn't matter
how scary you're already did the movie, you know.
And this is after the like Saturday Night Live, Dan Acroid sketches where they make jokes about toy manufacturers
not giving a fuck about killing kids with their horrible toys.
Yes.
And it was right before the classic big red commercial, which is, yeah, yeah, the big, the
big red SNL commercial, which is a Viking whose helmet spins and just squirts red toxic
goop all over the place.
So yeah, people knew that toys, that kids played with toys.
They didn't think like, oh yeah, an adult would like this.
At the time, kids, toys were for kids, you know.
So let's move on to the next one.
This is going to be a more, this is a slightly more modern toy.
Let's go to number eight.
Mm-hmm.
And I'm sure you recognize all the characters in this.
Uh, yeah.
This is, this is a Star Wars set.
These are some of your favorite characters.
Zet, Jukasa, Baron, Papanoda, Tier, Tineel, and Chi, Kiri.
And this, of course, everyone knows that this is the Star Wars
Lucas collectors set, which is the set collecting all the characters,
George Lucas and his kids played in the Star Wars prequels.
And I got to say, that's a pretty cool move for
a dad to do that. Yeah, I mean, that's a fucking flex. That's amazing.
What's amazing also is if you look at this smaller picture, one of the figures, the Chi
Ikari figure, I think it is, is side-eying the George Lucas figure like dad, I can't believe
you made me dress up like this. One of my big regrets is when I got a tour of industrial light magic
years ago is not buying this in the gift shop that they had because it would be, because
I just thought it was such a crazy thing to have to where it was like, yeah, yeah. I love
star was so much that I want toys of the creators family.
In terms of being in the movie, I don't
know exactly what these characters are, but they kind of all like they give the vibe of
like, oh, they would be standing behind Queen Amidala in one scene. Yeah. Yes, yes, very
much so. These are not major characters, but Star Wars has never let that stop them from
making a toy that a character is only appears in one frame, you know, like it's one thing, it's one thing to do this.
And it's another thing to wear like as a, as a wrap gift for Peter Jackson, some of
the crew got together and hired the, the Perry twins, the miniature sculptors to sculpt
up a set of figurines of Peter and Fran and their kids as 28 millimeter figurines, which
is amazing. And I think that's super cool. And he also, he also commissioned those same
sculptors to sculpt up a line of New Zealand World War One infantry, which is super cool,
too. But he didn't try and sell them to people that aren't his family.
Yeah, he didn't package them and then sell them. You'll notice also it says in the corner
here, ages four plus four year-year-olds love to play with
George Lucas' family members.
It's just, they love it.
It's a weird, it's a weird flex to be like,
you want to complete Star Wars figure set by my children.
So let's move on to the next page.
Now this is a more niche, even if anything, an even more niche product than the Lucas family figures.
This is from the Silent Screamers line from 2000, 2001, which was the strange thing of,
they look like McFarland toys, but they're not McFarland toys, where they are horror
toys of characters from silent movies, and this is Maria from Metropolis. And here's what I like about it. One, yeah,
I want a figure of Maria from Metropolis, maybe the greatest robot in the movies. I mean,
it's like C3PO, but a lady, but the things that I think are funny about this is that the sculpt
for this figure has made her boobs so much bigger than they are in the movie.
They're giant. Yeah. Well, also's sitting with her legs splaid wider way to part in the packaging.
Like, yeah, mostly packaging.
You just have like someone just standing there, but this, this is Maria spreading this robot.
Yeah.
Well, she's sitting on the throne where she's formed, where she turns into, where she
loses her robot shape and becomes Maria, the, the, taking
the form of the, the workers daughter. But there is something yet. It does look like her
legs are kind of cocked at a, at like a sexy angle, you know. Guys, and I want to talk to
you, is there anything nerdier than, and I have a reason for this. Is there anything
nerdier than buying a kind of gritty action figure of a character from a silent
horror film from the 1920s?
You know what?
I would normally say no, but I feel like this is a setup for something.
No, I think you're right, guys.
I think you're right.
Wait, it's still all you can say.
Yes or no?
I was going to say like, I feel like this, if I bring somebody home to show them my well-appointed living room,
and I have my display cabinet where I put all my in-packaged figurines, I would probably
put this one near the back.
Now, I'm asking you this because I did not own this figure, but I did own a different
figure from this line, the Caesar the Somnambulist figure from the Kevin to Dr. Caligari. Who that figure, it's like it's super, you know, Edward Siserhands, Gothy looking, but
it also kind of looks like the artist Michael Allred, creator of Madman.
Now I want you to scroll down.
There's a runner up for number seven on this list.
If you go scroll down, just the next one.
And that in, let me know when you get there.
Oh my.
The runner up is the Noose Faratou figure
of the same silent screamers line.
And the reason this really got to me is,
one is one of the few figures that comes with several mice,
several dead rats as things that you can have as accessories.
But also, I think it's possibly the least anti-Semitic
Noose Faratou I've ever seen, which really hit me.
That they, they made it to make one that did not feel like it was a cartoon in a, I ain't have. possibly the least anti-Semitic Nosferatu I've ever seen, which really hit me that they
if a man that should make one that did not feel like it was a cartoon in a nice newspaper.
I have to say that this feels like the spitting image version of Nosferatu, the British puppet
satire program, like they did a version of the bunch in Judy. Not so bad. Yeah, it's a little distorted from what you know from the FW
Murnau movie.
I feel like that was I feel like the packaging makes some promises that I don't know if it's
going to be able to keep like it says featuring skin burns when exposed to sun.
Yeah, I never had this one.
So I don't know if that actually happened
or not. Seems like it's hard to be meant. Based with extra rats. Oh, man. Yeah. Like I get
it. One rat is fine. And you'll notice that this one also, the base connected to the base
of the Renfield figure, which was sold separately. These figures were done with like this, you
know, this kind of twisted 90s kind of like distorted got style.
There was around this time that they had these like twisted
wizard of Oz figures too, where they're all kind of like
tough and scary.
And that's, it was along those,
it was in that kind of Maryland Manson,
we're gonna take Allison Wonderland or whatever
and make it like, and make it,
Kormac McCarthy twisted.
Ellie, yeah, do you say?
This is your daddy's nuts for you.
I would say this is not your daddy's most frot too, because your daddy didn't have a
nose for out to your great grandfather had a nose for out to.
Yeah.
So before before we take a brief break for ads, I want to just go down to one more.
I want to go down to the next the next one.
Go down to the next page.
So this is number
six. Don't scroll. Files number six. And so Dan, can you describe this? Oh, you describe
this figure since he has such a reaction to it. Well, it looks like a shirtless, unmuscled
man with a mustard described as German mechanic action figure from Raiders of the Lost
Ark. That's right.
And you'll notice that somehow, according to this picture I took from the internet, it was
on sale for $2.11, which is a strange price.
That's a strange number to put on a price.
I would like to highlight the inset.
There's a little inset picture of the figure in action that says, quick action arm for realistic play.
Because that's what I'm looking for.
I don't know what unrealistic play would be.
Like, I'm sorry, Bobby, you're moving that action figure around,
but it just doesn't feel like a realistic play to me.
So, and again, ages, ages four and not.
Ages four and not.
The character of the beefy Nazi that punches Indy in the face before being killed by a propeller is for ages four and not. Ages four and not the character of the beefy Nazi that punches Indy in the face before
being killed by a propeller is for ages four and up.
Of course, now this figure, what I like about it is partly one, it's a character you would
not expect them to make a toy of.
He's only in one scene and there's nothing particularly distinctive about him.
I was in being bald and having a mustache to that they call him German mechanic as opposed
to like Nazi soldier or something like that.
Because the fact that he's a mechanic doesn't really play into his character.
No.
He doesn't really just wrench or anything, you know, and also that when you look at the actual
figure itself, he just kind of looks like a dad.
He looks like a dad who took a shirt off to wash the car.
Yeah, he looks significantly less intimidating than he does in the movie.
And the movie you're like,
oh man, this dude is gonna fuck Indie up,
but the figure you're like, oh, nothing.
Ah, he's a little potato.
Yeah, I know, he's got it.
He's got a dad bod a little bit.
He's, you know, I mean,
I, you know, he doesn't have enough body hair to be a bear,
but he's got like, you know, nice mustache.
I, I, I like that this is a Kenner figure, you know, Kenner, obviously known for the original
Star Wars action figures.
Like, I think the G.I. Jones, well, what was that has, bro?
G.I. Jones has, bro, I, I do believe, but Kenner, of course, famously got the Star Wars license and rode that to
the money bank, as opposed to the other kinds of banks.
To the other godland bank.
A sperm bank, where they be like, why are you bringing these toys here?
We don't want people to use these while they're delivering.
Or the blood bank, which is where blade hangs out outside, waiting for suckheads
to walk in. He's like, I'm gonna smoke y'all. Now, this one doesn't come with any accessories,
but if it did, I imagine it would come with like a can of beer and probably like a little
portable black and white television set that it could, it could, it could prop in a garage
on top of a white bench. Yeah, or like a folding chair or a pretzel. That's a little bit real. You can't like a big, big pretzel.
Yeah, just like, come on.
Canner, give him a pretzel.
Come on.
I would have the pretzel as a beer.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So you have to imagine that at some point, a kid got this toy, took it out of the package.
Of course, they want to play with it and then left it in a box and that someone then
found it without the packaging and was like,
why does he have a shirtless, like a shirtless hairless bear daddy? Like, why does he have a toy of this?
Because there's nothing else about him that particularly screams adventure.
Now, as, so, now was roadblock the Chi-Ajoga, who kind of looked like this, or was that leather neck?
I mean, this, this guy reminds me of a sergeant slaughter, but without the hat and the sunglasses.
And he wore a shirt.
It sounds like we're talking about all of his distinguishing characteristics.
Yeah.
Now, let's take a break.
I've got a few more toys for us to go through, but don't scroll ahead.
Let's take a break because we've got some sponsors on this episode.
Dan, would you like to tell us tell the sponsors are not toy makers?
Unfortunately, that would be in real cool. Dan, who's sponsoring us?
Well, it's a real hard left turn. I want to talk to you briefly about microdosing. This is a time
of, I feel like that goes hand in hand with laughing about toys. It really is. It does. This is a
time in our lives, guys, where, you know, maybe we want to chill out a little
bit without impairing our judgment.
I think that, like, that is kind of the vibe of a current society.
Yeah, yeah.
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us to look at these pictures of toys. I mean, I didn't know I needed to make it a publication ready. I think you're doing this fine, buddy.
This internally use internal use document had to be hitting the stands tomorrow.
It's literally just a word document where I said to you as a PDF, I guess,
where it's one picture with a line of text on it. There's just a certain level of professionalism
I've come to expect from podcasts. I
want to remind everybody, as I mentioned before, if you're listening to this on the day of
release, that's Saturday, March 19th, that today is the day of our flop house live virtual
show where we're talking about masters in the universe, the greatest movie based on a
toy line.
No, of course, it's not, but I can't think of any off the top of my head that are better.
It's going to be at nine PM Eastern six PM Pacific, it's only $10 for your ticket, and if you
get it, you have one week of access to the downloaded video.
We're going to have some new merchandise for sale during the show that's only available
during the week of the show, and we're going to be doing new presentations and stuff.
It's going to be great.
That's theflaphouse.simpletics.com for tickets, theflaphouse.simpletics.tix.
So that's tonight, 9 PM Eastern 6 PM Pacific, theflaphouse.simpletix.tix.com.
So that's tonight, 9 PM Eastern, 6 PM Pacific.
Theflophouse.simpletix.com.
.
.
.
Hi, I'm Jesse Thorn, the founder of Maximum Fun.
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You know, for years, each new episode of this supposed advice show
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But now as they enter their twilight years,
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Okay, now without further ado, let's get to the second half of this list, which is my
five, my five favorite toys based on movies.
Now guys, we're getting into some really special ones here that mean a lot to me. So let's scroll down to the next one. Number five. So let's go to number five
again. You're going to see one of the classic tie-in figures. Dan, tell me what you see.
It's Bob the Goon from Batman, the movie. That's Tim Burton's original Batman from what is 89 I think I
it's 89. I forget the name of the actor. He was in a lot of Jonathan Demi movies.
Stopping sense. Yeah, classic character actor Bob the Goon. He's got a oozy. He's got a knife. He's got
a hat. And apparently according to this, this like wham, you know, balloon here, he's
got a button activated power kick. I want to see that shit in action or as it says, coup d'épire, mechanic action,
Paul bouton.
Yeah, so this might be a Canadian package.
It lists everything in English and French.
This is Bob the Joker's Goon as portrayed in the movie by Tracy Walter.
And yeah, it is.
This was one of your first movie based bad guys that I have in toy form
that I remember as a kid.
And I have to admit,
the character of Bob the Goon
didn't make a huge impression on me in the film.
But seeing the toy, I was like,
oh, I guess he must be a major character.
What's so striking to me about this toy is that
the figure does not even look like,
it doesn't look like the actor
and doesn't even look like the picture of the actor
on the packaging.
Instead of the packaging,
don't the packaging also doesn't look like the actor.
It doesn't look like the actor. I would say the picture of the packaging looks a little bit picture like the packaging also doesn't look like the action. I would say the
picture of the packaging looks a little bit more like the actor and the figure looks more like if Willie
Nelson had played Bob the Joker's goon. Sure. The picture of the page looks more like Billy Jack.
Yes, he looks just like Billy Jack. Billy Jack. Well, I was a bad fan. They had all these Billy Jack figures
sit around. Now, I got to say you said that he's a bad guy and you know what,
you can tell he's a bad guy because this is for ages five and up. Yeah, this is not for
kids only five it up. And of course his accessories are I think is Dan mentioned a gun at knife
and his hat so that his hat can come off when you need it to go. Yeah, yeah, when he sees Batman's
secret identity and his fucking hat flips off
his head.
And you got it, you got to give them credit over at a, I forget which company this is.
You got to give them credit that with Star Wars, they'll make up a whole name and a back
story for every figure, even if it's not in any way connected to what happens in the
movie.
But with Bob, not even a last name.
He is Bob.
He is the Joker's Goon that is all the information you're going to get.
And I hope you enjoy it.
To be honest, he looks more like Bob from Twin Peaks than he does like Bob in the Batman
movie.
So which would I would say is for ages six and up at least at least, but maybe it's a
hidden Batman Twin Peaks crossover, which would have been great, Dan.
Here's something significant.
I would like to say about the picture of Bob the Goon.
So he's wearing a hat.
If you look at the head, that's significant.
Yep.
If you look at the head, the hat seems to cover up to where his eye is on his hat, as if
beneath that, the hat, his head narrows significantly in sort of a zippy
the pinhead, the cone heads sort of scenario. Like I do not understand how a normal human
head would have this size hat worn as it's in here.
I would also say that this, this packaging art looks a lot like magic, the gathering and other fantasy artists,
Paulo Parente's work, who knows? Maybe.
Good. So that's, I mean, there's a lot of good detailing on this art, the, the, the kind
of expanding waste of the jacket that he's wearing is very lovingly detailed. So, so that's
pretty nice. But yeah, you're right. That hat doesn't, it looks like a big chunk of
the design. So Dan, I have a way works for the Joker because he's, he lost part
of his head. He's looking for it. Now I haven't seen the new with the Batman movie. Just Bob
show up in that please.
Bob's a good, does not show up. Oh, that's too bad. The Batman. Well, they're waiting for
the spin off the Bob. I mean, maybe it wasn't long enough. Do you think there's a director's
cut that's like five hours long where Bob the gun shows up? The funny thing is I mean, maybe it wasn't long enough. Do you think there's a director's cut that's like five hours long? We're Bob the Goons, yes.
That the funny thing is I went like again, I don't know if we, I don't think we mentioned
it in this episode.
I think we pull back the curtain.
We recorded two things at once tonight, which is a rare occurrence, but it's probably
why everyone's extra spicy in that of their jobs.
In the previous thing, we recorded a record,
which is an episode that will come out a week after this one.
Yes, I referenced having a almo season pass, which means that, you know, like you pay a certain
amount, you go and see, you can even see one movie a day flexing on all our listeners here.
Yeah, wow. Flexing. You can see movies whenever you want.
Take your space money and put it right toward the end. My point is I will see certain things
that maybe I wouldn't see otherwise.
Uh-huh.
The other week I did a double feature of Uncharted
and the Batman.
Wow, Dan, you need hobbies.
You gotta find something to do with your time.
I think life made a turnaround.
But my point is the Batman famous.
What we were rushing for, right?
Three hours long.
So watching uncharted before the Batman may have added to my impression of the Batman,
which was it was a, it was an old fashioned butt buster.
It, I might,, in pain after watching the
The Fat Man.
I, I fantasize about the times when I would get to go do double features at the movie
theater.
I haven't done that in a long time.
I have not had a very long time.
Still my best one was the witch or no, it was upgrade followed by hereditary.
Oh, what a fucking double-feach. Yeah, wow. best one was the witch or no, it was upgrade followed by hereditary.
Oh, man.
What a fucking total speech.
Yeah, wow.
I was fucking wasted by the end of that.
Yeah, if anything, I like, I can't argue with that other than I would probably switch him.
I like, I feel like upgrade would be a little bit more fun after the.
Well, why don't you go back and show him and tell us to do what the other way, Dan?
All the other way, Dan.
Yeah.
Man, after when everyone people first see Tony Collette crawling in the
walls, everyone's hooting and hollering it rules.
Yeah.
Now, that's a fine one to see in the theater.
Oh, what a movie.
That has one of my favorite floating body effects, hereditary.
Yeah, that's great.
Yeah.
So anyway, that's Batman Bob the Joker's Goon.
It's a classic toy.
Dan recommends the Batman.
He thinks it's great.
It'll make your butt bust. So let's move on to the next page.
Plus your butt at the back. Now, this is again another toy based on a movie.
Scroll down to the next one. Don't scroll any further. Just go to number four.
Now this is the bull alien from the aliens toy line from 1993. Were you guys aware that in 1993,
from the aliens toy line from 1993. Were you guys aware that in 1993,
almost 15 years after the movie Aliens came out,
they released an Aliens toy line
where they imagined, hey,
what would happen if the alien was in different kinds of animals?
And this is what we're like coming out of a bowl.
So just put this bowl for me, Dan.
This is like if the alien infected a bowl from TV's night court
is what you know, no, not at all.
No, you're misunderstanding.
That's a big.
It's a, I understand that that's a misunderstanding.
It's not, it's not actually.
Okay.
Oh, which is weird because Richard mall's blood is already acidic.
Yeah, but that's just because he eats so much to so much ketchup and vinegar.
Yeah.
Well, I would say about this.
It looks like a, it looks like a bowl and it looks like an alien.
And it is also, it looks like someone has sort of half, half, half, half
hazardly, half heartedly spray painted part of this bull alien red.
I don't think there's a lot of a rhyme or reason to which parts of this is our sort
of reddish. But now, it's, and I described to me again of this are sort of reddish, but that's really
good. Now, I described to me again, what's the, what's, what it makes it bullish? What makes
it bullish? It is other than the fact that it, the other than the fact that it is, it's
hedging big on gold right now. Yeah, it feels good about the future of the market. The
way it's, it's legs are, are kind of as if it's like, hooping at the ground. I don't know how you say it,
stamping as if it's going to charge and it's got some bull horns. Those would be
not too big. Now, Ellie, are these the same figure in both pictures? Because one neck is way
shorter than the other neck. So that's the thing it had a, it had a headbutting power
where it's neck could extend. So this is, it's standing up with the neck extended and
also sitting, sitting forward. That's what the alien that's already got a weird amount
of phallic imagery. Yes. And now it also has an extending, extending a vany neck as well.
Yes. You've understood it completely. Yeah, that was HR Geeger's fucking design notes
to the bull alien design.
I should also, you're going to be happy to know
that there's also a guerrilla alien which had a head
that you could squeeze and water would squirt out of it,
just continuing that imagery.
Now, the thing I like about this,
that bull alien in particular, I love the horns,
it makes it look satanic, like it's a demon alien.
But also, you can kind of build your own story around it, like, hey, what if Ripley, she's had a hard
time with all these aliens. She just wants to take a load off. She goes to the Calgary
stampede, the famous show in Calgary, and she just wants to take in some bulls at this
rodeo show, but then, uh-oh, there's an alien inside one of the bulls. And it gets out,
maybe it uses horns to tear through someone's belly belly and a bull's belly, I guess.
And it's just wrecking havoc.
And now she's got to get on a cow or a horse and rope that bull.
And it's a, you can, there's endless hours of imaginative play that way.
You make a.
I mean, I mean, for me, it's, I don't know about you guys, but I was just tired of
ferdinand just sitting under that fucking tree just dicking around.
I think he should get a xenomorph on the face and squirt out a little bull alien.
Yeah.
And they take that bull alien to the bullfighting ring and all the lady, lovely ladies
have flowers in the hair and he sniffs that the flowers and just tears the head off of
the Torridor.
Yeah.
This is how it happens.
So that's the aliens, bull alien.
Again, this, I don't have the packaging. So I don't know what ages
this was recommended for, but this was 1993.
Three and up.
I'm going to say 80 to 85.
Yeah, this is 1993. So it's still the era before toys were like a grown up
collectible. Yeah, explicitly. So let's move on to number two. Now this,
I know it starts to number three. Let's move on to the next one. Number three,
this is the toy I wanted the most when I was a kid.
Oh, like this.
So this is the city set from the commercials
for the real Ghostbusters toys.
This was not a toy available in stores.
This was the set that the professional commercial directors
and set designers made to show off the Ghostbusters toys.
This was not a toy you could buy.
There's a little bit of a tease on your part, Elliot.
This was a tease on the part of the advertisers, Dan,
because this is what I always wanted to use
in my Ghostbusters toys, and yet I could not,
because it didn't exist, it was not viable.
Yeah.
And I would just watch these commercials
and I'd be like, sell us the buildings.
I want the city buildings.
That's what I want.
Yeah, you wish that you had some kind of,
you were some kind of oligarch, I mean, you could just buy whatever you wanted. Yeah, you wish that you had some kind of, you were some kind of oligarch.
I mean, you could just buy whatever you wanted.
Yeah, I could just call up the commercial
and say, bring that to me and they'd have to do it.
Now, these are impressive little sets.
They look like, you know,
I'd the old HBO feature presentation city or whatever.
One of my favorite pieces of filmed anything
is that old HBO promo
It's a city at night the camera swoops through it here the buses honking
It goes over the suburbs then it goes over the mountains it goes into the sky
What's this coming out of the sky coming to us out of the universe this cosmic visitation is the HBO logo
We go towards it. We go into the O of the HBO logo and unfathomable, unfathomable universal energy,
prisms of pure tranquility and understanding and galactic harmony are flying through this O
and what does it bring us, your feature presentation. Oh, I just love it. Just imagine the music,
it makes my neck tingle. So Dan you're saying? No, it's the adventures of Ford Fairlink.
the adventures of Ford Fairlink. This thing, this thing, this, this, this camera takes up Pluto Nash.
It takes you up out of the mundane world of every now and up into the sky into a magical
place where the toy is constantly playing, starting Richard Brian.
Yeah.
Here's my blue.
This is.
And now that we've lifted you know that you've ascended to the heavens,
like onto the rapture,
here's Dream On starring Brian Ben Ben.
Still not on HBO Max.
Enjoy hot to trot.
Now I will enjoy that shit.
Yeah, I will.
I'm a kid.
I don't know it's bad.
I don't know.
It's got two things I love a talking animal and fucking Bob.
Yeah.
People who are hot to try.
Now, do you think the producers of that movie that there was an old man who was like,
we want to do a talking, a talking movie,
that a talk, a movie about a talking horse with Bobcat Goldsweight, a talking horse
and a talking Bobcat. Yeah. Make the movie.
And then he saw it and he was like, wait, the Bobcat's a guy.
Get this. It's called hot to trot get it because of horse
Now I was gonna say like this is a this is a lovely hot part of course is bobcat in this case I don't know of course. He's earned inherently sexy animal. It's those haunches
So bobcat someone that trots. I don't fucking think so
I would say that these, like, look, I would watch these commercials too, Elliot.
And I would be like, man, if I only could have these cool sets, the, their playing.
And like that was so, so cool.
But it doesn't, it didn't even need to, what I'm trying to get to is it didn't even
need to be like these nice city sets.
Like I would watch these GI Joe commercials, whatever, or they'd be like, they'd like have
like rocks arranged like artistically.
And maybe there'd be like some water, there'd be like a little river and like a fort made
out of sticks and things that they could blow apart with missiles. and I didn't know how to make that stuff as a kid, but I felt like this was the was read about that was so it was way my child mind work was those g. I go commercials, I was like, some kid made that and they're better.
These go spusters ads I'd be like well, no kid made this they bought it somebody bought this for them and I want it because if you can buy it, I can have it as long as I've got the green. And that's how I got into the vice industry just to be my ghost busters real estate building habit.
First you get the money, then you get the power, then you get the ghost busters.
Yeah, child, oh, just memories. So let's move on. So that's number three. We got two more left.
Let's go through the second one. This is my second favorite.
Oh, classic one. This is a classic one. Stewart, what is it? Tell me what it is, too.
It's Rocky the meat. So this is a toy. Unlike some of the other ones on here, I actually own
this. I still have it in my garage. It was given to me as a gift by I believe our former
co-worker Daniel Ray Dosh. And it was given by me.
What the fuck?
I know, I know, I know.
Oh my God, you got me.
I wanted you to get mad.
I wanted you to get mad.
Yeah, Dan gave me this.
You gave me the dance raw.
Yeah, Dan gave me this and it is a,
from the Rocky line where they were like,
you know what, we're just gonna make one of the meat
that he punches, that he practices on and it is a package.
It's just a side of beef and then a bloody butcher's apron that you could put on the rocky figure. And my
favorite thing about it is it just says it doesn't say side of beef or like punching exercise.
It just says the meat in big letters. Yeah, I guess like they're like what does our bees have?
It's got this rocky. Yeah. And so there's also what there's also a date on here. No,
number 21st 1976. So all the Rocky figures, they had dated on it,
which movie they were from basically, it would they would say that which move,
which Rocky movie they were from and what year that that movie was from.
So that's that just shows you this is their original Rocky, you know,
the famous. Yeah, the specifically listed 21st of November 1976, the meat versus Rocky
Balboa in the case meat gets top billing. Well, and because you know why? Because the meat
won on points technically. Yeah, technically. But the TKO, but the meat won on points in
the end. The judges were in the meat's pocket. The rumble and the meat locker. And what I like about this too is it is a star wars
level of making an action figure out of anything. Anything that could be made into a figure.
But for Rocky, a series that has never been, I think, particularly kid-friendly film series,
you know, um, then anyway, the meat, you can't, you can't ask for anything better than a side of beef action figure.
Or can you, because let's scroll down to number one for my favorite toys from movie.
Now again, this is a little bit cheek, because these are not real toys, but these are, uh, this is the,
my dinner with Andre action figures from the movie waiting for Guthman, which I, which are so like the joke.
And it is, well, they just sit there and talk, right?
Yeah, that's what I want my action figures to do
I can get action figures that fight ghosts or superheroes or whatever
But two figures that understand the importance of a conversation and a good meal. That's hard to find. It's incredible
Yeah, you know, you want an action figure like Andre Gregory who's gonna come in and tell you about some like
Bullshit spiritual experience he had across the world.
And you're like, that sounds interesting, but I enjoy sleeping under my electric blanket.
I mean, yeah, that's, I mean, the one that I really want is the wall is Sean figure because
finally an action figure who just listens, who's curious about what I have to say.
Who knows the questions that'll get me out of my shell, you know?
Yeah.
So guys, what would you do with your, my dinner with Andre figures?
If you were, if you were playing with them? What scenario would you put them in? Uh, well,
they would have probably dinner together in some, okay. So sticking pretty, pretty much
to the template of the, yeah. Well, well, I would say just like with my GI Joe figures,
I would test the limits of the physicality and the flexibility of these figures. I'd stretch them and pull them and see, I would take them to the edges of pleasure and pain.
Okay.
We're that in your sex, you know?
Now, the thing is, I wish these were real figures because I want to see them in that
package that says, ages four and up for the wallestown figure.
And to know that some kid would get it in the some kids grandma
went to the toy store. It was the day before Christmas. The shells were cleared out except
for this one Wallace Sean figure and it gets brought to this kid and it's the most magical
Christmas and they strap Wallace Sean to a model rocket and shoot it up into the sky and
Wallace Sean finally achieves his dream of going into outer space.
Did you guys know that was his dream?
I did not just learn that.
I just assume it is.
He's never said it, but I get a real wants to go into space vibe from him.
You think I figure he just wants to, you know, produce the best production of check-off
that has ever happened there in space.
Because it's the problem with it's easier to check out without gravity. Jason X plus the cherry orchard.
Starring Wollashon.
As Jason.
I don't know, man.
Jason is the star.
Yeah.
So guys, thank you for joining me on this on this little trip down my favorite movie based
action figures from the Gremlins toys of my youth to the Star Wars George Lucas's family toys
of my young adulthood until today, my love of my dinner with Andre and my wish to reenact
it in toy form.
I really never think.
Do you think they're ever going to make a movie where Jason kills a fuckload of organotes? Oh, you know that they should.
Jason, Jason, not Jason.
Jason, I mean, Jason from Jason's organotes, he merely, he was on the same team.
I mean, he's an asshole.
He is, I mean, he does lead to asshole.
He's terrible with Medea.
He seduces Medea into killing her family, you know, but I feel like they're leaving
money on the
table to not do Jason and the Argonauts. And Jason, for he says, been hurled backwards
in time to antiquity. And just on the loose, just going after, I mean, you have to have
a scene where I know it's conflating time periods, but nobody cares. You have to have a
scene where Socrates is like on trial. And then Jason chops his head off or something like
like Jason stash Julius Caesar, you know, just takes the organ knots.
Yeah.
Jason is inside the Trojan horse.
Yeah.
Oh, that would be amazing.
And they're like, Oh, let's bring this horse in here.
And he just busts out.
And he's just slashing people's heads left and right.
Jason goes to Hades.
Yep.
And Akeleus is like, Oh, I can beat this dude.
And then Jason stabs him in the ankle of the machete and he just just fucking dies. Yeah. This, this, you know what? Okay. This, that's what the
mini should have been about. Everybody go and erase your memories of this. I'm going
to do a new mini. That's all about Jason versus the organ. And every character from ancient
agent, Greek and Roman myth and history. But guys, I'm glad we could all hang out together
tonight. If you'd like to hear more of us talking about toys or just anything in particular, tune in tonight.
9 PM Eastern 6 PM Pacific, the flop house live show.
We're going to talk about masters in the universe.
I will talk more about toys, specifically,
he man toys and other toys related to said he man toys.
Some of my very true real life embarrassing memories will be said.
And it's all for only
$10. And Danins do have some real surprises lined up that I don't know what they are. They're
even surprises to me. And I'm excited about it. So go to the flop house dot simpleticks.com. Again,
that's the flop house dot simpleticks.com and join us. Won't you tonight with masters in the
universe. And if you can't make it the night that this is released, get your ticket anyway,
because you can still watch the video for one week only, one week only, one week only like in dream girls, but it's a
week instead of a night. Oh, I get it. Yeah, sure. No, it's going. Yeah, it's cool. For the
flop house, I've been Elliott Kaelin. I've been Dan McCoy. It's me, Stuart Wollent. Wishing you champagne wishes and toy dreams.
Good night, everybody.
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