The Flop House - The Flop House: Episode #154 - I, Frankenstein

Episode Date: June 14, 2014

Yes, Elliott, it should be called I, Frankenstein's Monster, but that doesn't change the fact that we watched I, Frankenstein. Meanwhile Elliott reveals the secret sex fetishes of Archie Comics characters, we learn Stuart's nicknames, and Dan asks the big metaphysical questions.Movies recommended in this episode:The GrannyThe Wages of FearDeceptive Practice: The Mysteries and Mentors of Ricky JayWhat's the Matter With Helen?

No normal human could have a jawline that ridiculous. We discuss I Frankenstein. Hey everyone, welcome to the flop house. I'm Dan McCoy. Hey Dan McCoy, right over there is Elliot Kalem. Hey buddy, thanks for naming me. And you know who just said my name, and said hi to Dan McCoy, was Stuart Wellington. Stuart Wellington and the three of us make the flop as podcast using it's like Voltron but instead of a giant robot made out of lion parts we just talk about bad movies. It's a terrible way to make a robot. And Bart talked to Dr. Voltron, the inventor of Voltron.

It's horrible. Well, you already zoologist. Explain what the deal is. I guess we can go. So let's be bad. You know what a right, you know what a professional host would do is just keep moving and not mention that I just did. Well, you were taking in a drink of water.

I didn't know what to fill the extra time with. The next part of the podcast. Which is? I was telling the people at the movie. That's right. So we watch a bad movie and we talk about it. Yes. The movie we watched was I. Come on. Frankenstein. Wait, you Frankenstein explain so much. The way that you're head and your body, you're not quite in proportion.

Okay, well, your total lack of ability to say things properly because you have a dead man talking to him. These are all accident things. Very insulting. And no creature born of God's work would have so little personality. Okay, well. That was the most exciting. Goodbye, everybody.

This was not really a laugh, Stuart. Anyway. We love mountains. We've been fighting. Oh no. Head to Antarctica to fight elder This was not really a laugh, Stuart. Anyway. We'll go up now and we'll leave the fight. Oh no. Head to Antarctica to fight Elder Thing.

Yes, Dan's to... No, well one prank assigns Monster went to the Arctic. Not Antarctica. Not Antarctica. Not the Arctic. To fight giant penguins. Yeah, that's a tickly elite or whatever it is. Yeah.

So we watched a thigh prank. So we watched a movie. Starting air in the egg card.ard and now we're gonna talk about it. Yeah, Elliot wait so before we talk about it I want to say that all means this is one of those Pumped the brakes guys because this one of those movies that when the When I saw the trailer you said this is the best movie this is when I saw the trailer, you said this is gonna be the best movie ever. This is immediately I'm like,

I'm gonna get to see this movie, I can't wait. And my wife's like, we're gonna go see this in the movie theater. I'm like, no, no, no, no. I'm gonna wait until I can see it with my buddies, we the flop house. Oh, very nice, we flop house. I like how you pause there,

because it could have been other buddies of years. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, they didn't wanna go see it. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, they didn't want to go see it. Yeah, I can see this. Justin, come on. Right. Or Todd or Chip or Moose or J.H. Are you hanging out with the Riverdale gang?

They'll have me. I wanted to go see the jughead, but he's too busy eating an enormous amount of food at Pops Chocolate Shop. I had to go with Mr.head, but he's too busy eating an enormous amount of food at Pops chocolate shop. I had to go with Mr. Weatherby, and he was no fun. And he was just doing the popcorn trick on Ms. Grundy the whole time. Those two were having sex, right? I have to assume it. Certainly.

Why does he have to use the popcorn trick then? I mean, I guess he needs to spice things up. To spice it up, and it was spicy, how will I paint your popcorn trick? Wait, hold on. That is a terrible choice. So, spicy things up, like he's role-playing spicy. Hell a pain. Yeah. Hold on. That is a terrible choice. So spicy things up like he's roleplaying like a stranger who's freaking her and exactly.

Yeah, the stranger he's he's going to be he's going to be Archie. Okay. Yeah, well, that's the they would play it. That Miss Rundee and Mr. Weatherby would play a roleplaying game where he was Archie and she was Reggie. They were experiencing forbidden love. Oh, we were experiencing forbidden love. It's full-slash fiction, Dan. All right, thanks.

But they also did another one where she was Jughead, because they had the same face. And he was a hamburger. Exactly. And he would lie there on a bed in a hamburger soup. Oh, I hope Jughead doesn't eat me all up. Just like how hamburgers do. Yeah, and Miss Grundy would be wearing that crown hat

the Jughead heads. I mean, it wearing that crown hat that Jagged has. I mean, it's a crown, it's pretty obvious. You do the math. You know what happens next. And Mr. Weatherby always was trying to get her to do one where he was bedding. She was Veronica and they were forgetting about Archie, but she thought that was too weird.

Yeah, too weird, yeah. But anyway, I Frankenstein is really good. So let we get past our Archie porn for a second. I Frankenstein is the story of Frankenstein. So let we get past our archie porn for a second. I Frankenstein is the story of Frankenstein's monster who as you may remember from the original Mary Shelley novel, uh, lives a hundred years and fights and fights demons. Right now, I don't recall that part. Uh, they made it pretty clear in the movie that right after he buries his creator, Dr. Frankenstein, another scene that's not in the book, because I guess he's quite... Yeah, he buries him in this like...

This Antarctic chap or some shit. So, it picks up kind of vaguely where the novel leaves off where Dr. Frankenstein is hunting the monster in the Arctic. But in this version, the doctor dies and the monster, having pity on him, I guess, buries him in, yeah, this ruined... Well, it's Scandinavia, I guess, buries him in, yeah, this ruined. Well, it's a scam, maybe I guess. It's ruined cathedral in the middle of the Arctic. It doesn't really, it's gonna be.

Unless he, like, he was just carrying Dr. Frankenstein for hundreds or maybe thousands of miles. But while he's super strong, he uses that super strong power later on to fight demons. That's true, but he's not carrying one human doctor. Yeah, he's like, look like a second potato. I don't imagine like a day into that. He'd be like, you know what,

why don't I just leave this here? And I'll go about my hair. I'm very old-seen now. Yeah, very little ice. Have fun being eaten by lobsters, dad. That's what he would say as he throws Dr. Frankenstein. And Dr. Frankenstein, even though dad is like, well, the lobster is,

Mrs. Miss Grundy in a costume, right? Yeah. And Frankenstein, even though dead, is like, well, the lobster is misgronding in a costume, right? And Frankenstein's monster is like, what? What are you talking about? Now, for the kid, now, just for the sake of convenience, because we're going to be saying the name a lot, I am going to set a title on standing. And I'm going to say Frankenstein to mean the monster, and not just the doctor, because it's going to get irritating if I keep saying Frankenstein. Why don't you come by the name that's given to him by the queen of the gargolus? Because we haven't gotten to that

part yet. So Frankenstein the monster buries his creator and that attracts the attention of a bunch of gargoliles who are a bunch of demons. I'm sorry a bunch of man demons and the way demons are presented in this movie it's literally like the very end of Mary Shelley's Frankenstein. And you close the book, you're like, oh man, that was a great story. Where could that go? Immediately goes to a demon's thought. Yeah, well, you may remember that the Mary Shelley's Frankenstein was designed to be

like an episode of True Blood. So the next episode picks up literally as the last one ends. Yeah, it's two people are having sex and then one person explodes and blows. And you may remember also that the end of the book and this was very controversial at the time, ends with the end dot dot dot or was it question mark. And then a page that says, Frankenstein's monster will return in you will we live twice. Monsters are forever. Oh, I would let that you know it. That's beautiful. If there's not a children's book called

Monsters are forever, I'd like to get tattooed that says monsters are forever. Yeah, yeah, and it's gonna be like one of those super deformed cute caricatures of Frankenstein's monster you in two thumbs up Um, yeah, but so these demons appear and the demons are basically people with monster heads Yeah, and when you kill them they or monster masks that they were with monster heads. Yeah. And when you kill them, they're monster masks that they were actually put on over their faces.

Yeah. Like normal faces in one monster hand. Yeah. Now, I mentioned when we were watching this, that the monsters look less like movie characters or scary monsters and more like the villains from like, are you afraid of the dark episodes? Like a kid's show version of a demon. Or like a monster bobble head. That's how. Yeah, because the heads of the

head They all look like they were in kind of like Marty Graw costume heads or maybe like demons in like a like Buffy or one of those shows. Hey Not to not okay. Sorry. I don't know. I didn't watch that much Buffy, but that's what I would imagine they'd look like. Yeah, exactly. Thank you I'm so sensitive basically as Ellie Elliot put it, if we switched over to the sci-fi channel and we saw these demons, we'd be like, oh, okay, those look right. This is a sci-fi channel, original movie level

of production design, effects for the most part. There's just more of them. But anyway, so these demons approached the monster and they start fighting them for whatever reason and a bunch of angel people who immediately stop calling a prank inside and start calling them monster. I can use synonyms. The same way that sometimes they'll say Stuart, sometimes they'll say Mr. Wellington.

Or the monster. And then they'll say the monster, yeah, exactly. Or boyphantasm. Boyphantasm. Boyphantasm, the pool hustler you'll love his balls the only place with his own his own pool billiard balls that are silver and

occasionally drill in people's heads and shoot their blood out so now we're gonna warn you I play a good game so the demons show up then the gargoyles, which are basically angels that turn into gargoyles that fly around. They say they're 100% angels, they're gargoyles. The only reason they are not just angels is the guy, someone in production was like, oh, it'd be cooler if they look like Gargoyles. I guess so.

Okay, let's just make an angel Gargoyles. And the characters who are demons, the characters who are Gargoyle angels, change back and forth between their... Gargangles. Gargangles. Change back and forth between their human and mystic forms at random.

In the middle of a fight, they'll go from Gargoyle to human and back. And the only reason I could come up with was that the characters understand the limits of the movie's budget and how many effects shots have been. Because otherwise just stay in one form, dude. Because you would say that like maybe they changed so they can emote more, but there's a lot of times where they just cut to a like a Gargoyle's rocky visage like nodding sagely at Frankenstein chopping the shit out of of some demons or they cut to a human face showing no visible emotions whatsoever because the actors aren't very good.

But so the angels say the gargoyles because they only refer to those gargoyles they save the monster and can happen basically right and they belong to what's called the order of the gargoyles which is just angels And they're fighting a secret war against demons. And- They have a special symbol that's went across with three slashes on them. With three slashes, because they're Jesus, I guess, had six arms. He's Dr. Octa Jesus. Yeah, some Martian Jesus. Yeah, Dr. Octa Christ, who has six arms and two legs,

or Martian Jesus, which is a good name for a band. But anyway, they explain that there's this long running war between devils and angels, gargoyles. And the big evil demon, his name was what? Niberius? Niberius. Niberius wants to bring himself to the bible, dude. Yeah, is it?

I don't know. Niberius wants the monster for some reason they don't understand. Yeah. Because he's a magic monster, dude. Well, we find that why later, but it's pretty obvious it's because he's a magic monster, dude, or some kind. They sell the monster to join them. The monster instead takes two magic weapons that are basically just clubbed with silver, silver.

It just big sticks and goes off to wander the wilderness for 200 years doing nothing but practicing his stick play on Cliff tops Now in a movie with a bunch of stupid looking fancy weapons. I think it's particularly funny that they thought like dumbest Yeah, I'll just have like these things that are basically just two pipes like Pipes you'd pick out of a junkyard Yeah, I took him the of a junkyard. You can beat people with. Yeah, when you took him, the guy goes, we're like, really? He has one step away from just beating people

to death with a tire iron. And I love that. I mean, actor who looks so much like Christopher Lambert has to have a couple shots of him like practicing his caught on the top of mountain. With long hair and like a rooted road as that like as i said like his outfit in this movie

is him wearing an overcoat over a hoody with little hobo gloves on so i guess having to pipes as is weapon just like a plate the idea of like this is like a homeless vigilante he's he's the land in the

the moment the shot that if that was frank completes the idea of like this is like a homeless vigilante. He's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he and they couldn't do they couldn't do a car goels the anime series No, I guess Disney wouldn't let the license go because they're they want to do that Avengers gargoyles crossover and They're like well you can't copyright the idea of a gargoyle Yeah, take take that lawsuit to 17th century France my good man so The monster has refused to join the gargoyles But then one day in the woods a bunch of demons him, and he decides it's now his mission to hunt down and kill all the demons before they can hunt him. He walks to civilization. Yeah, he won't do it for good reasons. He'll do it for revenge.

Yeah, he walks to civilization, which is represented by kind of Englandy, Canadiany, French French German town. Eastern European. And all we know is this town has one nightclub, but a public transit train system, a kind of university type building with a lab in it, an old cathedral, and a shitload of abandoned buildings. Like for all we know, this is Detroit, because no one seems to live there. Yeah. Half the buildings are just wrong.

And the gargoyles over the place. And the gargoyles like crazy, just like to try. As you pointed out, and it took me a while to realize this, but it's totally true. And our character would totally blend it. It's a story. Other, he's a screwed up like a guy dressed like a hobo. Other than the scene where we go to the club,

Dr. Frank is sign of the beginning, and then like the love interest lady. And her coworker. And her coworker. There are no non supernatural characters in this movie like none the streets are empty anytime They're almost no extras in the entire movie and anytime there's a street scene the streets are just empty and full of smoke Yeah, and it's like the youth it's kind of like this is taking place in a corner of dark city You know if you ever see extras those extras are either gargoles or demons. And anytime the stakes are described,

it's always, well, we can't let the demons wipe out all the gargoyles and humanity. Yeah, because there's a moment where you're like, well, they're just garglo monsters. Oh, I guess they're not worried about. They're not worried about. Yeah, that's not an argument. You're worried about humanity. It's like, I am legend situation. Like, there's not worried about. They're not worried about living there. Yeah, that's not how you're worried about humanity.

It's like, I am legend's situation. Like, there's that one guy. And we also find out later that the hero's layer and the villain's layer of damage. And you find out that from each other. And you find out that one guy you thought was a human was just like a mummy or some shit. Or a creature from the black lagoon.

What are you talking about? We're saying the three humans that live in town. You're like, oh, they're all- Yeah, I wouldn't be just surprised if One Turn Out be an alien, one was a robot. And the other was like a mouse that had a spell cast on him. But this movie, so it's conceivable that this epic battle between Good and Evil is happening in like an abandoned rundown neighborhood in Montreal somewhere.

But the point is, his going after the demons is getting the Gargoyles mad, because as the queen of the Gargoyles tells him, this war must be fought in the shadows. Now, why? There's no people to see it anyway. The CGI looks less crappy. In the light, the CGI doesn't look as good.

Now, here's something I never understood about these movies. Okay. How come these movies, by the way?'t look as good. Now here is something I never understood about these movies. Okay. What are these movies, by the way? Ethic battles between good and evil that are happening the shadows are wonderful. You're underworlds, you're legions. You're underworlds, you're legions, you're night swatch, that kind of stuff. Sure. How come the battle has to be fought in the shadows? You'd think so if these angels and demons are fighting each other, this means this is the organizing metaphysical principle of the universe that there is a god There is a devil there is pure good and pure evil and they are fighting for the fate of mankind So why does it have to be a secret the same way an RIPD?

It's like ghosts are always trying to catch ghosts that are escaping hell But we can't let mortals know about it. Well, why not? I don't understand. Yeah, what's gonna happen? That's so bad. Well, I can't they know maybe they could help you like what what would be better in your fighting against demons than if you had Like an army of Marines armed with your magic weapons that could just fight a bunch of demons since the demons seem to have no powers other than having Goofy monster faces and I'll trump your metal physical problem Which is with something that I also mentioned in peeding during the movie which is in these movies about a grand fight between good and evil there's always the implication that there is some sort of God God figure here some organizing principle and if that's true why does this

all powerful God and maybe this is just a problem with religion in general why does all powerful God need a bunch of foot soldiers to like fist fight? Well, it looks bad guys. You might as well ask Dan why is there evil then? And at all, if there's no powerful God and I would point you to time bandits, then Ralph Richardson says something about good evil,

or something about free will, I suppose. That's as good an answer as anyone's ever going to come up with. So thank you, Terry Gilliam for ever gonna come up with so thank you Terry Gellium So no thank you at least but brothers great at least that movie Treats that as a joke though. Yeah, but it's a joke that has a that has a meaning yeah has meaning something about free will I mean, I think there's two point two possible but that applies to humans the evil that humans do Has to do it pretty well.

What you guys say is the evil that men do lives on and on. The evil that men do lives on and on. That's right. Oh, wow. The evil. You can hit the high notes. I cannot hit the high notes. I'm just saying that, yeah, there's a reason

that my Iron Maiden cover band Fear of the Dark did not get off the ground. Exactly. It's all based. You're a little fairer tone. Free will creates evil and humanity. But if you're talking about creatures of pure good and pure evil as I believe that this movie posits, then why does nothing more like the one Gargoyle would like a magic ax?

Maybe. Then here's this. I would say this is a world where the... Like a magic axel. Maybe then here's this. I would say this is a world where God has created it and then left. A deist universe. A deist universe, yeah. Where there's a candy grip and running it. That explains it. Yeah, the creation of life on the deist.

So anyway, moving on with the movie because the reason this movie is. No, let's talk about questions of philosophy. I would love to. We've got to talk about fucking I Frankenstein because that's the that's the modus operandi of this podcast. Yeah. Well, so we're going to get people up in arms burning us an effigy that we don't talk about the movie. It happened to people to play in about it. I would love if this podcast created so much fashion that someone burned us in that machine. I think that's kind of a monkey's paw wish, and I don't want you to make it.

I think that sounds better in your head than it doesn't realize. All right, fair enough. Actually, no, just give me that monkey's paw. I don't trust you with it. No, I was going to wish for unlimited wishes. No, but they all turned bad. Oh. I was going to for unlimited wishes. No, but they all turned bad. Oh.

I was gonna wish that the fingers curl up in a special way, so it leaves with one middle finger up, so I get sass people with my monkeys paw. You'd like sure all the wishes blew back on me in an ironic way, but take a look at this. Like the guys drive down the street or leave the monkeys paw up there. The guys flipping me off with his one weird monkey and wait a minute

He's just holding that he's doing Seriously flipping me off Stewart don't you want to use that last wish? No, that's the middle finger of wish. We got to keep that one So anyway Gargoyles are fighting demons the demons are led by Bill Nye. He Yep, so let's say one thing about the movie aside from air neck heart by Bill Nyehee. The science course. Yeah. The science course. Yep. So let's just say one thing about the movie. A side from Aernack Heart, everybody is like a British or British English Commonwealth

actor, it seems. And this movie seems like less of a movie and more of like some kind of UK government welfare program to distribute subsidies to English actors in exchange for spouting shitty exposition dialogue in movies. It's called elevating the material. It's exhibit A of, we're going to hire British actors so that when they're talking about the I'm going to, so then when they talk about I've collected thousands of corpses so that

we can bring them back with electricity and then put demon souls in them. You're like, that sounds reasonable. You know what? This doesn't sound goofy as I'll get out. Because the English guy is saying it. I will say elevating material. And this is the one moment that justifies the movie's existence. Is there's a moment where Bill Knight,

he responds skeptically to somebody by raising a single eyebrow. And it is beautiful. The way he does it. It is just the right blend of acting talent and camp inherent company. I love that guy. I'm sad that he's spent so much time in these sorts of movies.

I'd love to see an aging Bill Nye play. You mean Bill Nye, he is aging already. Yeah. Well, him playing Dr. Frankenfurter in the Yorker picture. Oh, that'd be great. What if he did like the the York picture show 20 years later reunion and it's those

characters but later I mean I know they all die at the end. I mean that sounds like like you're like I don't want to see that. Let's all meet up here in 30 years. Let's meet up at the place with the house but let you let's meet up with a place where the

river and magenta took the house up into space and the river and magenta are the house up into space And the riff raff and magenta are on the planet Transylvania Yeah, and they're like hey whatever happened to brand Janet and they just decided to go back Yeah, and find that yeah It's the Rocky Horror big Jill show And they dance to Motown classics this is is a million dollar idea. Richard or Brian, where are we or? We didn't try to do that. It's not a million dollars.

Yeah. What was the name of the shot treatment? Treatment, yeah. Was the sequel. Which is, it's an interesting movie. I've never seen it. It's one of those movies like List of Mania where I want to see it,

but it's not going to live up to what I want it to be. I mean, it doesn't, it does not even live up to Rocky Horror, but it's an interesting movie in its own, right? In its own way. It's too much singing for your taste. Yeah, because I hate singing. If I watch right here and now I'd probably enjoy more.

I saw it a lot when I was in high school. Right. My friends who loved it, and I think it was, I just got tired of it. I think it actually suffers from it's cult. I think it works better, divorced from it's cult in my mind. mind like what about the children? What if they get divorced? Yeah. All right, let's keep going with this. So I Frankenstein. Uh, basically, they're all fighting. So they want to learn Dr. Frankenstein's secret of bringing people back to life so that they can

bring back these bodies and put demon souls in them. And have an army of demons that takes over the world or shit. And so they want either the monster or they want Dr. Frankenstein's journal. And the rest of the movie is just these characters running around looking for this journal and fighting each other. And there's a little bit of, there's a little bit of tension

because the gargoyles wanna, I don't know, they're designs are at odds with Frankenstein. They're at a cross-fraggin style. Frankenstein has, it won't go with the Gargoyle. There's one cocky Gargoyle. Well Frankenstein doesn't have a soul. They think Frankenstein doesn't have a soul, and so he is the wild card in this.

But in the end, it turns out he does. Spoiler alert. Spoiler alert. I'm gonna skip to the very end of the movie. There's also a pretty scientist who, I guess, is set up as a lover for Frankenstein. He's played by Ivan Strahowski.vinsky Stravinsky Stravinsky. She was in Chuck and she's currently in the 24 many series and she was in the Massivex series.

And she's in that one episode of Louis. She played the model he sleeps with, the lanterns that he punches by accident. Yeah. So she's a pretty lady. I'll say that. So that was the evidence you were presenting for the actress in this movie being pretty. I don't know. I was just trying to relate to the audience.

I'm trying to. By listing the credits of an actress. Who this person is. Anyway, the person is. I'm trying to wrap her. You're Mr. Skeleton. The only person he can trust is this scientist. She fixes his wounds by sewing him up as if he didn't have an eye on his body.

In this weird apartment. In his water apartment, that Stuart aptly described as looking like a level in a Batman video game. It's just like the most falling apart rotting. You always see these. And Frank, it's time sleeps off his wounds from a demon fight well she reads the entirety of the doctors journal yeah cover to cover

there many cliches that are seen in this movie one of them is this apartment where you see like in these movies where it's just uh... it's crumbling plaster and you see the skeleton of the wooden uh... slats through the wall and that's always the case and i'm always like really? He's the landlord. Yeah. How are all these supernatural creatures finding these places to squat in?

But there's also like in another movie that'd be weird but as we see in this movie every building is amazing. Yeah. There's no people there. But also early on there was that scene where they go to the club and it's just like this is all that supernatural characters do in movies is they go to club where house music plays. Yeah, that's all they want to do. A club that is not even that full.

Not a full, very well lit. Strangely enough for like an electronic a house music dance. It's better lit than the rest of the movie. Like better lit than the Gargoyle, like. It's like a doctor's waiting for it. You can easily get a face. People are reading highlights for kids. Just to keep care of highlights for for for gargoyles. A lot of people are having fun with the

purpose in that club. I can't remember. I can't remember what stupid book is. This Ranger Rick is all about gargoyles. Oh, look at this issues. This is Gargoyle. Goofy's doesn't help his mother clean the table. Gargoyle fights the forces of evil. And let me mention this that there are somehow fewer Gargoyles than demons, but the power ratio is so stacked for the Gargoyles who can fly, have super strength or made of stone, have magic weapons. Well, the demons just kind of run around getting around. Basically, they're like stuntmen. Yeah. Yeah.

They are, these demons, they're only proper match-up between them and the angels from Legion. Yeah. Who were so incredibly killable. Like, these are the same way where it's like, I just imagine these demons running into things and exploding. And that's their whole life. If you put like a thumbtack in these demons, they burst into flame. Yeah.

Yeah, you kind of wish that they could meet with the vampires from the Blade movies and have a long talk. Or talk like, yeah. Like, maybe we should come up with some strategy or... Maybe we should like get stuff. Maybe we'll trade, let's trade. Yeah, the old axe of action. Work out for a while, man.

Like, you know, hit the gem before it is. Or maybe like, we should bring weapons to the fights too. So it's not just us running into axes. I kind of feel like the Gargoyles are the role of like the werewolves because werewolves are usually like the big tough guy that fights off a legion of stuntman monsters. I guess so.

I mean, in this type of movement. I feel like the Gargoyles feel the role of. Magic Angel Heroes? Yeah, who are not totally good guys because the main character doesn't see eye to eye with them. But anyway, the Gargoyles keep losing even though they're super powerful and the demons are super weak, the bad guys get the, you have to get Dr. Frank and science journal. They force the scientists to figure out how to revive people.

They start, they start sending electricity to these thousands of bodies they have suspended underground. And the matrix. And this kind of like steam punk matrix set up. But what's great is that each one of them has a screen on their chest that says reviving. And then the percentage of reanimating. Reanimating.

Reanimating. And then the percentage of the reanimated. As if like every. That's an important piece of information we need to have. information If every person has like a computer like like start up bar digital Clock has been hooked up to them account down clock and I didn't Dan you made the point that for people who didn't know how to Revive dead bodies. They seem to have the perfect apparatus already set up for reviving How reanimated they are and like what is, what is the idea of like someone who's 50% reanimated?

Well, I think I'm looking at him right now. And they move like they're moving around. Yeah, they're like, they're moving. They're moving down, they're moving around. Yeah, it was like when I was, they've all got happy feet. Yeah, I like that they've already, like they've already developed the technology to determine how reanimated I've had a lot of reanimated it was a like when I was

recovering from knee surgery and I felt like I was in the kill bill movie and I was like looking down at my like toes and I'm like all right move move. Well, no, when you're 25% percent when you're 25% animated you're like kind of listless. Yeah, if you're so animated, you're like I guess I could do something 100% you're you're like, yeah, let's go out. This will be fun. Let's get dinner. Yeah. 75% is like, you want to get brunch? Like, I don't know. How long are we going to have to wait? What's the weather like? Let me check. But so skipping all the way to the end, Bill Nighy reveals his demon form, which I got admit, he's the boss demon.

I assumed, oh, this is after this is after. He's still ready. Let me just say, he's the boss demon. I assumed oh this is boss this is after He's Bruce bring me to say that Frankenstein's monster has and I'm saying it again because it's second-hand to me Frankenstein's monster shows himself to the Gargoyles who hate him and want to kill him because he Killed one of the Gargoyles when he was attacked. He shows up then walks down the street like a block he was attacked. He shows up, then walks down the street like a block. The bad guys hide out. The bad guys come out and fight and the Gargoyles are like, he let us write to them, of course, which means the Gargoyles are hella-dome. They didn't notice this. They can fly. They can fly and they didn't notice that they didn't ever say, hey, these Gargoyles run away from us all the time. Let's, these demons run away from us. Let's fly above them and follow them and see what builds.

It's a simple mistake because they look very similar, except one has wings and the other has, I guess, a mask on her. Except the demons all wear suits and the Gargoyles are all wear like Immortals, style, leather, you know, outweigh. Like skirts and... Yeah, leather, like, it's like... It involves... Breach Clouts.

Yeah. So they're fighting and Bill and I he reveals himself to Frankenstein. I thought he was going to be like a real cool looking demon with like wings or something or he'd look like Tim Curry and legend or the bad guy at the end of Fantasia, but no, he's just got a monster head. He's just taller than the other. He's just slightly taller than the other monsters. He has more horns on his head. And he is gonna put a demon soul into Frank's eye. At that point, you're like, I just kind of wanted to see for Bill Nye.

Yeah, he'd rather see the special feature where Bill Nye he explains how his agent negotiated his contract for the movie. He explains how much money he got for the movie and what he did with yeah I know you know what I don't make the movie just give them a little night in the money and hire a crew three guys Yeah, I'll go around all day and let him spend millions of dollars and see the device make it be kind of like the trip Yeah, which is a bill night. Yeah

And you know what brings Steve Kuggen in why not two of them it can't be that expensive no It can't be as expensive as making I Frankenstein. For half the price, you get twice the movie. Yeah. Anyway, so the demon tries to put a bad soul in Frankenstein, which is how Frankenstein's against. You mean the demon? Yeah, Frankenstein tries again.

I just like some asshole kid or anything. You put a demon soul. Yeah, the kid from Problem Child. He's not trying to put the Slipy. Thanks for inviting me. That's a movie too. He's not trying to put the soul of like Eleanor Roosevelt there because her time was cut short and she's there's more good for her to do on the earth.

The Frankenstein has a lot of hellfire flying out of his eyes but then it turns out he has a soul already. The bad soul was rejected and he kills the head demon, and the head demon's death is so explosive that I guess it destroys all the bad stuff. And the Gargoyles meanwhile are as slowly as possible destroying these reanimated bodies, just kind of like hitting them one at a time or just like knocking down a rack of them. Like Pinyatus. Yeah, and but they all blow up anyway, so it doesn't matter. The Gargoyles didn't even need to be there the whole time and Frankenstein decides.

Frankenstein. It's like Raiders of Lost Ark. Yeah, it's this movie is just like Raiders of Lost Ark and that one thing, and in no other quality whatsoever. If the Gargoyles did nothing, if the bad guys got Frankenstein and tried to do that thing, they still would have lost. They still will.

Yes. The Gargoyles. They still will. Yes. The Gargoyles could have taken the day off. You know what Gargoyles? Frankenstein should have been like, I got this one. And at the end of the movie. He kind of did. Yeah.

The Gargoyles did in person. He, at the end of the movie, he accepts his new role as protector of humanity and fighter of demons. And he takes his two sticks and he goes out with the knife. And he takes on the name Frankenstein and declares himself.

Yeah, I guess Frankenstein. I guess. Which I just realized is what a pirate would say if he was agreeing to what Frankenstein just said. I Frankenstein. But I do think it's weird because I guess that means that the character arc in this movie is that Frankenstein accepts that the guy that he killed the guy's wife of and left to freeze the Arctic is his true father. Yeah, I can see that issues with the guy and at the end he accepts him and that's it made if he

brings closure to him. I don't think that's as crazy as he. And he he came to that by beating the shit out of a bunch of demons. That's why it seems weird to me. I don't not sure why that provided closure for his daddy issues. Yeah. Um, well, this is a pretty dumb movie. Yeah. We should, we should go on this. This is written by the guy who wrote the Underworld movies and it feels like yeah, exactly. Yeah. This is a, and it has the similar visual style of gray. It's not as gray as the Underworld movies, but if you like your horror adventure science fiction fantasy action movies, super gray and dim and not particularly interesting to look at or watch the story of, hey, try this movie, I Frankenstein. And if you want to see Aaron Eckhart act, I would recommend watching interviews with him,

describing I Frankenstein, where he explains how Frankenstein is the original loner, the original antihero, the original party animal, the original party animal, and how this is a story, this is a character story you need to be told. I want him to say that Frankenstein was the original Herman monster. But the years that that, that, that reminds me of something that someone said online that was really funny when Channing Tatum was talking about how Syte is to play Gambit or something. I figured it was a set up, I wish that their favorite thing is when the celebrity now has to explain why they've always wanted to play this superhero they just heard about. And it feels kind of like, sure, certainly Aaron Heckard had heard of Frankenstein before.

Frankenstein is a part of our popular consciousness, has been so for 200 years now roughly five. I mean, you should play this new badass hobo version. But why, but why Frankenstein is the role he wanted to play so badly when he gives it so little energy and so little of his acting talent? Uh, yeah, let's, let's move on to final judgments, whether this was a good bad movie, a bad, bad movie, or movie you kind of liked. All right, we had to say bad bad movie. Yeah, I gotta say, I am totally, and I'm usually a purist in a lot of things. There have been so many different versions of Frankenstein

that I'm totally open to a complete reimagining. Frankenstein's gonna survive. It's like a hamlet. Like if I see a bad production of hamlet, I'm like, that's cool. I'll see another one again. Eventually, it plays 400 years old. It's not going away because this one bad production.

Like Frankenstein will survive this. So if you said to me, we're gonna make a movie where Frankenstein's monster is kind of like an action hero who fights demons I'd say that sounds stupid, but maybe there's a fun way to do it, but they didn't do it. Instead, they tried to make him like a dark, brooding Batman type and it, but throw in a Crap-load of underworld stuff and it doesn't work. I'm gonna say it's a bad bad movie. I'm gonna take the counterpoint Actually to what you just said, which is that I don't mind the idea of a reimagining of Frankenstein, but this particular reimagining of Frankenstein is the most boring. No, no,

it's the laziest dullest way they could do it. Yeah, I'm just angry at the trend these days where it just seems to be like, let's take anything in the world and plug it into like a typical superhero narrative. And that's what all modern action movies seem to be. Certainly all modern fantasy action movies are like, let's take something. It's similar to how. Something and everything.

It's similar to how with like Alice in Wonderland stuff like that and Snow White and the Huntsman, it's like, let's take a fairy tale or a fantasy thing and just make it a Lord of the Rings movie. Even if it doesn't speak to the spirit of the story at all in the case of like Alzen Wonderland. But I think this is more malleable than that. It is, but I mean like this is in that...

At this point, the character is so far divorced from the story and you could find a new way to make him an Adventure hero that's not just this bland kind of superhero filler. That's true. I just I'm just tired of it's basically the same Abe Lincoln vampire hunter template. No, that's true. Well, I think you guys are fucking crazy. What? are fucking crazy. What? This movie was great. You have a queen of the Gargoyles played by Miranda Otto delivering her best Judy Dench style monologues. And she only seems to have one split of clothes. And there's an evil, evil Gargoyle played by Jay Courtney from I mean, he's just got a bad attitude. I mean, a bad attitude if you will. Okay, so I think he's evil. And then there's all other kinds of stuff.

Like the writer, the movie gets to play one of the bad guys. There's a bit where they electrocute this rat and it comes back to life. That shit's amazing. You guys are nuts. Okay, so I break it's time. I a fan. I a fan in style.

That was the most ironic final judgments. I know they should have made I Frank and Himer John Frank and Himer takes takes a little break from directing movies to fight Gargoyles and demons but all of his Hollywood friends come to help him burlankaster the ghost of Robert F. Kennedy is it would be great i frankenheimer or or if i frankenstein stand for Ignatius frankenstein and it was a cross between frankenstein and confederacy of dents were it stood for it stood for isic frankenstein the son of al franken and benstein got married and adopted a baby call us Hollywood. But before we move on to letters, I guess what I'm saying is the golem was the original Frankenstein. Yeah, sure, protecting the ghetto of Prague.

Talking about, of course, what's his face? The star for wrestler. Thank you for the awesome golem. Here's speaking of ghettos. Andy Sargis did an amazing job. How come the picture in the floor of the ring? How come during the black exploitation horror phase that brought us Black Yilla and Black and sign? There was no black golem. It's a ghetto story. It's a ghetto story. You just have you just make it set it in the inner city instead of it's a palatine and you make it wasn't a shadow. was it was it was it was a Jewish quarter

But that's besides the point isn't a city rather than a village. I'm sorry, but it's okay But I black golem hey somebody go back in time and make it along with Borlando so Before we move on we'd like to thank our sponsor as they have been for the last couple episodes of Squarespace, which is the all-in-one platform that makes it fast and easy to create your own professional website, portfolio, and online store. Great my own?

Yeah. Even I, Frankenstein. Mm-hmm, even you, Frankenstein. If you want to put up some videos of your like awesome Kata with your stick attacks. If you Frankenstein want to show yourself beaten up some demons, show your enemies with their streaming video. And where would I get the tools to make of that site?

You do that at Squarespace for free trial and 10% off that free trial. Visit squarespace.com slash blog house and enter the offer code Flophouse at checkout. And look, Squarespace makes it simple and easy. You don't need to know HTML. Good, because I do not. You can just use their tools to design a beautiful website using their pre-made templates. It's got drag and drop content. It's got 24-7 support through live chat and email.

If you don't know how to do it, even with the easy tools they provide, you can talk to a support person at any time. Plants started $8 a month, and that includes a free domain name if you sign up for a year. It's got responsive design. My God, Quafan, or the Flophouse podcast. I think someone took Flophouse butts already. Oh, awesome. I mean, that just redirects to our website.

Yeah. But thank you whoever bought Flophouse butts. Yeah, read it. And now you have to just have to buy a Flophouse wives butts. But for Dan. Yeah, but um. But um. We're talking about Squarespace because it's hip

to be square, square space that is. If you want to, uh, use Squarespace to design your website now, you can start a trial with no credit card required today and you can go to Squarespace using the offer code Flophouse to get 10% off your first purchase. And it's just to show your support for us. So I believe in this product so much,

I'm not going to make one of you for saying off-for-quode just now. Thanks, buddy. So what was the site again, squarespace.com? Squarespace.com. For all your web development needs, that's true. And the off-for-quode was flop house. Yeah, it was.

And that's great. I'm signing up tonight. Thanks, guys. So now we're moving on to letters from listeners. Like you, the one who's listening to us right now. Great. Are you going to hear your letter tonight? You, the listener, you jump up and fright.

My letter, my letter, it couldn't be better. My letter on the flyhouse tonight. Maybe, but might. Could they better my letter on the flat house tonight maybe but might could they read my letter tonight internal rhyme I'm sent in my letter couldn't forget her sending in that letter the pop house the pop house read my letter for free so I need a chunk of jitter well I wait for a while to read some lends I know that my floppaus guys are my beders

floppaus read my letter Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr I typed and sent into the ha Oh, yeah, I didn't hold that note that well look it's late at night That letter I wrote I meant it note for note the letter that I wrote Goosefloff guy No, a little higher a little pitch on that one All right. Well, when you write letters, you write letters to the flop house from your first letter to the other one you wrote, write us a letter and we'll read it someday when you're a fan, you write letters. Kerry Westwood's story. Yeah. So this first letter, a letter, a letter, a letter, a letter, and suddenly you'll hear the letter

that's so near you. I was looking for a title to the letter, but the new website doesn't have titles, so that was what was confusing me. A lot of people are writing through the website now, emailing directly, and so we don't get the subject headings, which, you get to make it up. So this one has no title. But this gentleman writes, I write to him, admonish, praise, and question. First, the admonishment.

I wrote some time ago to thank you for helping me get through a very tough time. Well, I didn't expect my email to get read. I was hoping it would at least let you know how much I've enjoyed the sweet, free golden entertainment you've provided to me. Imagine my surprise when I tuned into the next episode to hear Dan chastising the listeners for not being concerned enough with his knee injury, which he probably got performing some sort of pervy activity.

You know it. Needless to say, I fell into my asthma of depression and guilt. Yes, asthma. Rending my garments and smearing ashes on my face. I've only now recovered. That's for the praise. I mean, all you need to do recover from that is wash your face and put in a clothes on.

As for the phrase, you guys rock, every episode seems to get better. And I have to say, I think that I think- I killed this one. I have to say, I think the leader of the group who is far too unappreciated for his comedic sensibilities and right personality has finally gotten you all went to shape. So I say thank you to you, Flop House House cat, for working your management magic. I see what he did there. Classic Bainswitch. No, misdirect. I'm sorry, misdirect. Finally, questions. Elliot. That's me. Being a history buff. Do you have any revolutionary war

history books you would recommend? Stuart. Johnny Tremaine. Stuart. Yeah, I guess it's a young adult novel. Let me get through these and we'll we'll soak it back. Stuart, why coer's light? Why oh why coer's light? Dan. What happened to your hook hands? Did you have surgery to get them replaced with less hook-like implements, such as mannequin hands, keep on flopping forever? Peter lasting withheld. So Elliot, you would take my job for me.

And you actually, and come back to me because I'm gonna look up the author of the book. Okay, I'll jump on mine. Core is light because it's super watery. And it's like drinking vitamin water if it made me stupider as opposed to a better at stuff. It's like so instead of smart water, it's dumb water. A dumb waiter.

Yeah, I drink a ton of other stuff, but this is... As to what happened to my hook hands. They were replaced by much more insulting and personally damaging traits that people have imposed on me like being boring. Yeah, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Who are you really at the homophob? I was supposed to be the homophob. I was supposed to be the race. No, yeah.

Okay. Yeah, I'm boring, Ellie. That's why I have reached a position of success in New York comedy, and I have, whoa, have produced this successful podcast. It was through the sheer boredom of my personality. You were so bored with your personality. You were forced to do other things Well, that's partly true and the revolutionary war book that I would recommend you're right, and you're not boring. You're merely

Boreish That's true. I would recommend a book called Patriots the Men who started the American Revolution by AJ Langef Which I found to be very readable and dramatic and also Educational book about the American Revolution. Okay. So, we'll meet later, but Stephen is also. And, yeah. And if you wanna be, if you wanna be particularly about one battle,

there's a good book called The Battle of Brooklyn about The Battle of Brooklyn, which took place in my Institute's neighborhood, but before we moved in. Okay. This next letter, not But before we moved in. Okay. Um, this next letter... Not before. Frankenstein moved in. Well, Frankenstein lived in Brooklyn for a while?

Yeah, I think so. Now he loves in Williamsburg. Oh, that guy. So, this says to the floppers, I've been listening to your podcast for a few months now, and I finally made my way through most of the back catalog I think you're constantly outpouring a lot for that vivacious bubbly scamp mad's michael send his finally rubbed up on me culminating in a dream I had last night which mad's and walking human thumb Andrew's emmer

Travel the world. I can see that eating exotic foods or peoples Thanks to say wholesome for long as mad soon found himself in bril and a Russian political coup. I was roused for my dream before it's conclusion. But it left me wondering, what kind of adventure would you like to see mad's involved in? And keep it PG. I know how you guys are when it comes to that guy. Thanks for the last fellas. Jim last name withheld.

Well PG back in the day used to be way crazy. Oh, yeah, they used to have PG comedy with nudity in them. Where a teen wolf could surf on top of a van back in the day. I mean, he could still do that. Probably. Yeah, that would be our. That's very sad. I'm just saying wolf in a van.

Not like Tonya Roberts, nude and beastmasters. Well, don't. Well, don't you. Well, I am douche. Well, she met you. That's the top of the business. Toplessness and beastmasters. Well, don't you? Well, I am. Well, she met you. Don't you remember how the topples and some catty shack? And that was, I think, no, that's the thing. I was gonna say, don't you remember that movie?

When that movie, the program came out where the football players were like lying down in the middle of the road and then cut that scene. So maybe it's actually got ran over. Sorry, you know, respect for the dead and all, but they were lying down in the road and got ran over. But that, but team will, nobody tried to serve on a van. Are you kidding me? Everybody was that she was awesome. So you're saying, are you a styles or are you a team wolf, Elliot? I am one of the guys hanging out elsewhere in the high school. I don't think I've been to

either one. You're the guy with his penis out of his pan. I'm the guy in the last scene talking his penis back into his pants and the stands of the basketball stadium. Yeah Best ball court anyway. Oh, so what was the question? What was what would man? Course, let me just say what adventure would I like to see Mads Mikkelson in their no adventures I wouldn't like to see Mads Mikkelson in maybe he's fighting demons with the help of some gargoyles sure That's fine, but let me just let me just put one little thing in your mind, a little thing called Jurassic Mads.

You figure it out. I would like to see Mads Michael Sanian, an old-style Broadway musical. I think that'd be a lot of fun. I'd like to see a movie where Mads Michael's in place an English teacher in a tough high school, and he asked to get some kids to, you know, to stop, to straighten up and play around.

Yeah, stop fooling around and show the class full potential. Or maybe he's a summer school teacher and he's got a motley crew of students who don't pay attention and he has to help them all pass summer school and also keep his job. He's speaking of which, Kristi Ali was in summer school. Yeah, that's what I thought. All right, I just wanted to confirm that I checked it up after the last episode. Oh, okay, I thought you were implying

that we couldn't do a remake of summer school with Mads Michelson and Kristie Ali at a falling out. Yeah, the two of them hate each other. Just so you know, before you make that, the way you do that, look who's talking reboot with Mads Michelson as the baby. Before you can Kristie Ali cannot be in the same room.

Before you put, Kristie Ali, I said he's a Christmas. Before you put Mads Michglen as the baby. Before you and Kristie Alley cannot be in the same room. Before you put, Kristie Alley, I think you should put Mads Midglen in a new Veronica's closet series. No, before you let Mads Midglen voice the bullets in the remake of Runaway. Before you do that new version, before you do Cheers, the next generation. Yeah. So this letter, It's Cheers, but on a, this letter is titled, Hitting the Big Time.

I don't know what it's going to work. It's that's basically, it's just, it's just what we go over again. Think about it. You trigger people to go to the holiday, I can get shot by a time again. This letter is titled, Hitting the Big Time, Dear Flop Housers. I was listening to one of your old podcasts where Dan was limiting, he had no Wikipedia on the as letters title hitting the big time dear flop houses i was listening to one of your old podcast where dan was limiting he had no Wikipedia page curious to see if this heinous crime had been rectified in the ensuing years i

was delighted to see that it had was shocked to see it had been not nominated for deletion some years ago and i think not worthy enough for shame Wikipedia but it's even more delighted to see that Stuart now has his own page as well. Thank you, Matt Kerman. I'm wondering now if Dan and Allie had seen any changes

to Stuart in the months since he became a Wikipedia superstar, has the fame gone to his head now that he's achieved where I assume it was his life goal. I assume he was constantly being stopped in the streets. Even before there was a Wikipedia, that was his goal. I assume he's constantly being stopped in the streets. Even before there was a Wikipedia, that was his goal. I assume he's constantly being stopped in the streets, but people are asking for his autograph

and asked to deal with a paparazzi following day and night. I hope that he will remain the same old steward, still the lighting and movies where people get their ding-dongs ripped off and thinking that text speedos are indeed the height of fashion. I would hate to see him turn into a diva, creating a rift in the flop house brotherhood and house the flop house house cat dealing with the fact that he is yet to get his own wikipedia entry?

He is not happy. Sincerely, Kelly last name with help. He prefers to be more of like a puppet master behind the screen. He's more of a legend. He's also known as screens. Uh, I will say that Stuart drove up to the podcast recording tonight, uh, in a yellow Lamborghini driven by a chimpanzee in a tuxedo. So let's just say the path the fame famous gun to his head a little bit. I mean, Parking up, he's not gonna park it or in this neighborhood. No, he's just driving around. I just wonder how that's driving the block constantly.

Yeah. And he is drinking Corsair Light, but he's drinking it out of a diamond-studied beer koozy. Yeah. And his speedo is now made of gold. Very uncomfortable. Very chafy. He now has gold penis poisoning. That was in an early draft of gold finger. Wasn't gold finger back then. Go! So I hope that answers your question.

Our last letter of the show is titled the leprechaun series. Please explain. Let's explain. answers your question. Our last litter of the show is titled the Leopardcon series, Please explain. Let's explain these, the Leopardcon, it goes to space, it's been the hood. That's a monster. It's like a little monster, guys. It's like a little monster, guys. It's a little exgenre brand new in space. It goes a little something like this. I just recently watched all six Leopardcon movies and I'm huge. You had six dates in a row, I guess. I'm confused I confused you why do you watch all six leprechaun movies Why you get least around four you get tired the leprechaun doesn't have a huge bag of tricks

I totally remember rent by the way I totally remember renting leprechaun in space on VHS and my local Hastings VHS copy Wasn't a very good copy and then there was no sound and I still watch the whole You did all that Like while I rented it I paid for it. I'm gonna watch it I'll just pretend this is surroggy eyes and stare. Hey, I'm starting But I wasn't ready prepared to like make a stink about it Well, I guess I'll make the most of it Mr. Leprechaun to continue with the question, why does this series exist? What is the target demographic?

They aren't scary or thrilling and given the meandering style of films, they don't even seem to be trying for thrills. Well, they're Robert Altman made in the town. They're true graphic for kids, but not graphic enough for exploitation enthusiasts. Like, most of them scared stupid. Most of them have one violent kill and one boob shot, no more more no less They're generally funny, but they seem to be vaguely aiming in the direction of comedy There's no consistency between any of the six films. I don't get it. Who's this for? Who said and even leprechaun?

Brilliant the kids just can't get enough dark modern interpretations of goofy Irish folklore explain Well, I think they found their target audience in our letter writer. You're like six of them. I would say that they were ahead of their time in doing a dark interpretation of a fairy tale type character. But.

I remember as a kid, I watched the second one a couple times. Yeah, it seems like. Before the one gory kill and the one boob shot. The audience is like 14 year olds, you know, hey I have to admit I've only seen the first leprechaun and my experience of it was watching the first 20 minutes Enjoying it a fair amount and then watching the rest of it sober the next day and clicking Can I fast forward to the end of this thing when?

This who plays the leprechaun again is it work? Yeah, I think it's just a work Davis vanity project He really loves this leprechaun again? Yeah, I think it's just a work Davis vanity project. He really loves this leprechaun character. Like a live-tube story. Yeah, he wanted to, this leprechaun character he thought was great, do a TV show, public appearances. I mean, they were going for kind of like a Freddy Krueger type. They want a Wisecrack and monster. Raise awareness of leprechauns,

and how leprechauns want to keep their gold. And he's super powerful. Like his powers are fairly ill-defined, so you can have him do whatever you want. He's basically Tom Bombadillo. Yeah, I feel... Well, that sounds great. Well, like evil Tom Bombadillo.

The movie where Tom Bombadillo is the villain? Exactly, and his wife Goldberry and his pony Faddy Lumpkin. Just singing an interminable song. So, I'm exactly... Being an absent-minded god. old Barry and his Tony Fattie Lumpkin just singing in Terminal songs. Exactly. And being an absent minded God and saving people from old man willows. Welcome to the forest using his infinite ability to occasionally do something.

Yeah. What a weird character. We are going to get a ton of really. Yeah, for our Tom Bomberdill slaying. That's so, like that really feels like talking, clearing his throat. Like, he got through the first few chapters, and he's like, oh, this is moving pretty well.

And he's like, um, okay, uh, well. I think we need a lamb. We've got to slow this down. We need a funny guy. Let me put something in that even Peter Jackson won't put in a movie. I think he trapped the characters in a situation he didn't want to save them from.

So we literally did what he does in the hobbit over and over again and just had another character wander in and save them. But made the character way too powerful by accident and was like, oh, well, there's no danger if I just have this guy walking around. So I'll have him be absent-minded Don't they say why don't we just give the ring to Tom bomb? Yeah, cuz he takes the ring and he's like, oh, this is great

And they're like they said like oh, he'll just forget it or something At Tom Bombadil So I hope that answers your question About the movie I don't know what to say you'll never got it made him for money Yeah, I feel like they're made for like 14 year olds. Yeah, you could convince their parents a lot of them watch them because most parents are like, this can't be that. They're like a leprechaun movie, there's probably songs and families.

They're like a travelogue with a leprechaun. You get to see the hood, you get to see space. Oh, yeah. It's the every time. It's all accurate. I feel like the hood at that point, they're like, we are going for the hardcore irony crowd. And the, you gotta go back to the hood. The first leprechaun is what, 20 years old now?

Yeah. Like, that's a long line. Oh man, that's fun for a criteria collection. Yeah, that's a criterion box set. With Peter Bob Donovich, doing it. Now Peter Bob Donovich. It's a guy, he's the world biggest leprechaun fan. Peter Bob Donovich.

He's got so many names. He's got so many namesidant Peter Bob Donovish Bob Donovish look at my thing though. I'm gonna do Donovitch Peter B So many first names Building Peter Donovitch I'll tell you about the time orson and I were having dinner or some whales that is who should walk by but Sam Picking Paul and it went Peter. He said you wrote the DURNDY script. Instead of an ask-out, he has a dirty bib. Oh yeah. So let's move on to our final segment,

which is recommendations of movies that we actually liked, movies that we recommend that you watch instead of I Frankenstein. Stewart, you'll be here. Or if you're Stewart in addition to I Frankenstein. It's too late. Or if you're Stuart in addition to I Frankenstein. I'm praying to go. Which he called the awesomeist film of the year. The I Frankenstein-iest movie.

Yeah, is there a DVD box that I can put a stamp of approval on by now? Guaranteed entertainment. So. Is there the lamest of the blockbuster stamps? So. For stickers I get you guys would say so still keeping with the theme of a Frankenstein of a of a you know a an original loner hell bent on revenge. I want to talk about a movie about it. I'm missing. I'm just a fellow who might live in a castle.

You might have difficulty. I don't know connecting with people. Women, perhaps his own ding dong. I'm just joking. I'm not going to recommend Castle Freak. Although I did read a great interview with Peter Jackson, or not Peter Jackson's tour Gordon. They're both have beers in her fat. But I was reading a great interview with Peter Jackson or not Peter Jackson Stewart Gordon they're both have beers in her fat.

But I was reading this great interview. I mean, Paul Prudome. I mean, Chris Claremont. I mean, George Harmon. So I was reading this interview with Stewart Gordon. I mean, Santa Claus. Where he was talking about, you know, other filmmakers are pushing the envelope that he appreciates and he mentioned the human centipede.

And I feel that's kind of disappointing because I feel like a, a Stewart Gordon directed human centipede would have been so much more gross than Tom Six's human centipede. Yeah, just to have more, more imagination. Yeah, exactly. Um, but the movie I really want to recommend. Also features. I've regularly known that one.

It's a full-seat one Uh It's women, and recent MacLeod actor Like the fact I do like that that was a selling point for the movie We just such a William Castle old-fashioned thing We talked to 10 doctors who all told us that our human centipede theory would work Who both told us Yeah, I guess you could sew do three people together, ask them out.

It's just a story for now. But is this the future of medicine? So I'm recommending another movie that features a loner who has difficulty connecting with people. He's been fighting demons for quite a while. And unfortunately, a woman that he gives a magic potion to turns into a demon and that woman is the granny. Little did wait, what's his name? The character's name is Namanami. Little did he know that when he gave the granny this magical potion the queen shall I think I don't remember

That she would take the potion at the wrong time like a gremlin and become a super powerful demon granny and then Kill a bunch of people so if you haven't already watched the granny I'm pretty much pretty much required viewing. I think it was it when a TCM essentials Number one of the sight and sound pool? So the granny. Yeah. Would we find this movie? In the hearts of the school, through it everywhere. In the reflected eyes of any child that has, I don't know,

imagination. Or I think you can find a BHS. I don't think it exists on DVD yet. So I'd quickly like to recommend two movies and I'm saying up front that I'm recommending two movies this time. I'm not sure. The problem last time was you were like, let me tell you about two movies I'm not recommending. Yeah. I'm not getting to my regular days.

Just own up to it. So quickly I rewatched Wages of Fear recently, which is a movie that I originally had seen on a semester abroad in London years ago and immediately thought like this is one of my favorite movies ever. And I, but then just did not watch it again for years and years and years.

And I got the criterion disk and it's beautiful and it's a movie about basically a bunch of guys in, they're in South America, right? They're in sort of all-in-dead-in positions. They get a chance to make $2,000 each by transporting a bunch of nitroglycerin across these rocky roads and trucks that can blow up at any time. And it's directed by Enrique Cluzzo, who did Diabolique, which is probably what he's best known for, I think, in America, but I think Wages of Fear is better. It's my bad, the abelique. Likor Boe is better than the Abelique, I think. But it's beautifully shot, and the movie is about half over before anyone even gets in the truck,

which is not waste of time. It's all character building time. It all shows who these men are and why they would put themselves in the position. And it's just a great tense thriller and character study. And I also want to recommend a movie that I saw on Netflix streaming called Deceptive Practices. And it's a documentary that's nominally about Ricky J. Although Ricky J deflects a lot of the time talking about old magicians that he admires. And I just love old time magic and close up magic.

Magic gets a bad rap mostly because what most people think of is what most people think of is like sleazy long-haired people gyrating while there's lasers in the background and smoke machines and putting a lady in something you would love. Gyrating putting a lady in a thing, lasers, smoke machines. But it's all like Jerry Riggs, like giant prop magic. You saw him at like, for instance, the David Copperfield making the statue of Liberty disappear trick.

Yeah. Where he just rotated the platform everyone was on. Yeah. Whereas I have a real love and respect for people who have taken the years to learn the totally useless skills that are inherent in slight of hand. Yeah, but I mean, in a larger sense, it does nothing for the world, but in another sense, it's beautiful that they've spent so much time becoming a master of this thing. In that sense, it's similar to the documentary

Giro Dreams of Sushi or something like that, where a man spends all of his life in pursuit of becoming perfect to this one. That is professional. Yeah, and I love magic. I love the oral tradition of handing down these tricks. I love just kind of the sleazy, blood-billion kind of like carny quality of it.

And the gyrating and the lasers and the smoke. And Rick and Jay is such a great Lerlin historian. Lerlin. Of these things. I just, you know, it's just a thing that personally I care a lot about. Like if I had, if I had was granted the wish to have like a technical skill. No, keep in mind, this wish would be real magic.

Yeah. And you would be using real magic to get fit magic. Well, if I had a wish, I would probably go for a hunting, able to play guitar a lot better than I can first, because that would actually impress people. I mean, both of these are cool things that you can get better with with practice. No, no, I don't care, of course. I want to say something like a magic knee or something.

But a magic, unterrible knee. But I think it would be quite something to be like very good at a slight of hand. I've never had the patience to actually take down the patience and control. Good at it. But here's your monkey's paw moment. You're gonna wish for an unbreakable knee

and then your other knee is gonna break. Oh boy. Well, your leg falls off at the hip or something. Damn, you monkey's knee and then your other knee is gonna break. Oh boy. Oh. Well, you like falls off at the hip or something. Damn you monkey's paw. Then monkey's paw is an asshole. So just give it up. Give somebody else a call.

So the point is you love magic and this is documentary about magic. Yeah, and I don't know, John. And necessarily like whether on a technical level as a movie, this was the best movie, but as a, we're not asking that. As a portrait of Ricky J and like like, who's a fascinating guy. And as on a personal note, like, I just found it very pleasurable to watch, like, this

documentary about Ricky J. and about magic. So deceptive practices. Deceptive practices. And it's on Netflix streaming. Does sound a little bit like a late-night cinematics movie. Yeah, deceptive practices sounds like something that involves a woman changing her underpants in front of an open window. Like a sexy, lawyer movie. I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say that I like to say carry word. Oh yes, I did notice it. Anyway, a lot of worrying going on. I'm going to recommend a movie that's a little,

that's kind of a sleazy movie, but it's a lot of fun. And that's a movie called What's the Matter with Helen? It's a Curtis Harrington movie and who directed it. And if you know Curtis Harrington movies, you know, there is going to be at least one middle aged woman who goes crazy. And there's going to be some murder and a blue jasmine not a more psychotic and There's going to be some kind of nod to old-time Hollywood and this movie has that in spades

It's set in the thirties and it stars Shelley Winters and Debbie Reynolds as two women who are the mothers of two boys who committed a kind of a thrill kill and who are the mothers of two boys who committed a kind of a thrill kill and they've been threatened by people who knew the victim and so they escaped by going to Hollywood and setting up a dance school for little girls and Shelley Winters is very religious and Debbie Reynolds is looking to land a husband and the two of them formed this kind of bizarre relationship but at the same time they're afraid that they're still being hunted by the person who wanted to kill them as revenge for their sons killing this woman. And there are around the, it's a pretty like knowingly campy movie in a way that I usually don't go for, but In Curtis Harrington's hands it really works. And around the time that Shelley Winters thinks she hallucinates that she is seeing her dead husband who is killed by being chopped up by a tractor while backstage at the child's recital and

starts screaming and ruining a patriotic number sung by little girls. I realize this is a pretty fantastic movie. So if you're in the mood for kind of melodrama that's not as good as whatever happened to Baby Jane, but it's better as good as whatever happened to baby Jane but it's better than hush hush sweet Charlotte as part of the trend. I'm often looking for that. And very much as part of the this this kind of 10-year fad of older Hollywood starlets now being in horror movies about crazy people. It's a really good example of that and a lot of fun and Agnes Morehead has a one very good scene in it as an Amy Semple McPherson evangelist type who does not

approve of Shelley Winter's behavior. So I'd recommend it. It's called What's the Matter with Helen? I would recommend though, don't look up the poster or any of the original advertising materials for the movie as spoiler alert. They literally give away the ending of the movie on the poster. So don't do that. To tell you where the matter with Helen is. They don't tell you what the matter with Helen. Oh, okay. What is the matter with Helen? She's nuts. Okay. So guys, what's the last part of the podcast? The last part of the podcast is when we say goodbye. What's the saddest part? Well, do we have to like Frankenstein will be out there with

our two sticks fighting bad movies, wherever we come across them. Just slab the shit out of that. It's giving me a good smack. Yep, wearing a hoodie and Tobo fingerless gloves. And maybe we'll lead the good movies to the bad movies and the good movies will kill them. They live in the same neighborhood. So you can know that we're out there and those people who are out there are me Dan McCoy Oh, there's a bum Stewart Good work Stewart perfect and perfect cute and I Elliot K. L. Good night everyone Yeah

Yeah, yeah! Oh, the Franken. When you're all the Stein. Al Franken. Give it up Stein. When you're Franken Stein. I. Franken Stein. Dancing on the ceiling.

Pop, pop, pop. I'm high on the ceiling, pop, pop, pop. I'm high on the ceiling. Under dance, and on the ceiling. Oh, what a Frankenstein. You're dancing on the ceiling. That's right, Dan. I took your song, and I hijacked it, made it a different song. you