The Frank Skinner Show - George Clowney

Episode Date: August 19, 2023

Frank Skinner's on Absolute Radio every Saturday morning and you can enjoy the show's podcast right here. The Radio Academy Award winning gang bring you a show which is like joining your mates for a coffee... So, put the kettle on, sit down and enjoy UK commercial radio's most popular podcast. This week the team are in Edinburgh! Frank has been mistaken for a magician, Emily has been to a seance and Pierre has seen some Norse-mythology themed wrestling. Oh, and it’s coming home!

This is Frank Skinner. This is Absolute Radio. This is Frank Skinner on Absolute Radio with Emily Dean and Pierre Novelli. You can text the show on A1215, follow us on X, is it still called that? And Instagram at Frank on the Radio. But you can't block us on X because he stopped the blocking thing. And email via frankatabsoluteradio.co.uk. Any of those would be lovely because we love to hear from you

and we're a long way from home. We are. You know how far we are from home? Come. Do you know how far? This far. We are in a marvellous place where this is a constant soundtrack to our lives.

In the street, in our own homes, bagpipe music comes a-creepin'. Actually, is this a bagpipe? I think it's a fiddle. Anyway, it's lovely. We're all having a fabulous time. I think it's true. Oh, yeah.

And not only that, but England, if I may say this, in a sealed room in Edinburgh, are in the World Cup final, which is very, very exciting indeed. Frank, how do you feel? Because I do trust your spidey senses. Well, I keep analysing myself because when I started watching the women's football team about ten years ago because my partner wouldn't watch men's football so I thought I'm going to have to watch this stuff. And I started to get into it.

Very forward thinking of you. I know, well, that's what I was like. And if you're a bloke watching women's football you have to constantly keep in an eye that you're not just trying to be all very modern. I'm not like a guy who's doing yoga to meet girls. I don't want to be that guy. And I was in the flat the other day on my own

and started really punching the air and screaming during the game. And I thought, it's happened. I'm actually properly, sincerely enjoying it now. So I texted Matt Ford and said, you know, I watched the game today and I realised maybe it was a stance before, but now I'm really feeling it. He said, yeah, that's what all woke people say.

So, OK. OK. But I think I'm pretty convinced it's the real deal. Woke Frank. Yeah. And, you know, there's all this, I mean, I love Serena, the boss. They made a big thing today that she said, I feel like I'm living in a fairy tale.

But I saw that interview after the match, and she did say that, but in the tone of, I'm living in a three-star hotel in Great Yarmouth, there was none of that reality, you know, I'm living the dream. She's not, that's not in her game. I love her steely underbelly. She's never seen her steely underbelly. No, no, no. I'll tell you what I love about her.

When she was a player, you know, she was a brilliant player, which is never mentioned. She got like over 100 caps. Yeah. But she played for KFC 71. And I want to find out more. I want to find out more about that team. Were they sponsored by the Colonel?

Do they wear white with a little black tie? I really hope they do. But the tie would be painted onto the kit, obviously. Yeah, you couldn't just... Although Leeds United in the old days used to have sock ties, which were elaborate little things with their numbers on them. On their socks? Yeah, so they'd hang...

I think up here in Scotland, in Highland dress, when you put your socks on, there's a thing hanging below the sock. Flashes. Yes. And there were those. But we don't talk about those anymore. Always a risk. And Man United had those medieval bar tops as well,

the crisscross affair. Oh, yeah, sort of Robin Hood, men in gold. Men in gold. So, yeah, it's exciting and um i'm i'm i've actually changed my church going so it doesn't clash with the game i've had to go to a vigil mass i mean that's true love the church must have leeway for that given how big they are in south america yeah the catholic church still when you hear priests talk they always always talk about the Irish team. Even if they're not Irish.

It's Catholic Church is so aligned to all that. But I'll tell you what I did here. I had... Sorry. I won't. I got distracted, Frank. We usually have affairs held up to signify that time is up,

as our regular readers will know. But today we actually have a tam-o-shanta. And what a tam-o-shanta. Yeah, but you haven't said the best thing about the tam-o-shanta. What is attached to it, Frank? It's one of those things that comes with hair. Sort of inherent wig. Obviously, I'm anxious here about cultural acquisition,

but it is ginger, and as the father of a ginger, I feel I can celebrate it. And we have a ginger assistant producer today. You make it sound like a Labrador. We have a ginger assistant producer as well. Which reader did you go to? I always say, although I am not ginger myself, I'm a champion of gingers, just like Joanna Lomley and the Gurkhas.

That's how I do it. Brian Coltelli, who definitely thinks it's coming home. What about Brian Blessed? Yes, that was... Brian Blessed did a recitation of three lines set to... Was it set to music?

It's hard to tell with Ryan Blessing. It could have been the reverberation of the inner sanctums of the building. It was hauntingly not set to music. Oh, okay. Isn't it interesting? I watched it and it could have been set to music. It's so loud. Well, I was listening to it for, I think it was about the 14th time last night in my hotel room,

and I had to frantically keep pressing the decrease sound button on my laptop because I was genuinely worried about people next door. So, will you please keep the noise down? Yeah, it was, what must it be like in his flat? He can't live in a flat. He must live on an estate. He must have egg boxes on the walls. I think he has to move every time he sneezes.

Yeah, exactly. It was very fine. Did you like it? I did like it. I liked it better than, I don't know if you saw Derek Jacoby doing Sweet Caroline on Channel 4 News. No, that didn't happen.

I was so ready to be convinced. That didn't happen. Sweet, sweet didn't happen. I was so ready to be convinced that didn't happen. Sweet, sweet Caroline. Yes. Good times never seem so good. What I like about the renditions, as we'll call them, is the way that they try and make them quite conversational. Brian went very sort of...

Henry V. It was Henry V, but it was also slight sort of 70s play for today he also said Jules Rimini which is obviously a flashback to some Italian

family holiday I think he also said Jules I think you'll find he went Jules Rimini but he was great I mean it's

oh I loved him but I like that it sounded he really brought the dialogue to life, Frank. Thanks very much. He said,

everyone seems to know the score, they're so sure. Yeah, I know. You should check it out, guys. It's something. Do you think when he came off, he said to the floor manager, do you think Elizabeth Beer Group was alright? I always think you should play these things absolutely straight no i don't think he's ever said to anyone do you

think that was a bit big he is at risk of shattering the steel girders that hold that building up when he's doing it towards the end and then he did a sort of high he went high pitched at the end well he sort of did a come on England or something at the end he did a big scream but yeah but he went high he went animalistic

it was a howl of passion animalistic that's what he went just when you think you can predict blessed he goes high instead of low

I've never thought I could predict blessed what was his like a whisper what was his what was his sweet nothings like in his courting days?

Oh, just an ear completely torn off. Oh, man. The other thing with the semi-final victory is after it, Serena Wiegmann gets the team and all the staff in a big loose huddle and gives them a Henry V speech. And then they interviewed Lucy Bronze, who is a, I know PA looks a bit like who, she's like a tough, tough defence.

Actually, her middle name is tough. Yeah. It really is. What? Yeah. I know. It's the best nominative determinism ever because she's like a real hard woman.

A woman of steel, considering she's called Bronze. And they interviewed her after and they said, what was Serena saying? Looked really moving and motivational. What did she say? She said, I can really hear it. Yeah. Oh.

So I'm glad women footballers also have that power to bring down the poetic moment just like the guys. Frank Skinner on Absolute Radio. I went to see a... I went to see a lady, I've been there before. No, I went to see a lady, I've been there before. No, I went to see a clown Tuesday night. Do you know a piece called Andrea Spisto? I know the name, I haven't seen the clown myself.

Oh, you two and your exclusive clown club. Do you know her, Pierre? I went with... One clown myself. Oh, you two and your exclusive clown club. You know her. I went with... One clown a month. Clown club. Yeah, I've done two clowns this week. I spoke to Frank. He said, yeah, I've got a lot of clowns to see this week.

I think it's sometimes I just feel I'm feeling clowny. That's the sort of sentence that you'd expect from a sort of debt collector in a 70s cop. Got a lot of clowns to see this week. This clown? George Clowney, that's what they call me. Are these clowns? Can I just establish?

I want to hear all about the clowns. But can I establish what sort of clowns are these? I'm only going to do one clown at a time. One clown at a time, sweet Jesus. Everybody, come on at home. That's all I'm asking of you. Go on, ask me the clown question. Are the clowns, are they the sort of, you know, the plastic wig with the red hair, Stephen King? No, no, these are the modern clowns. But the modern clownss so they don't that's what concerns me a bit

is that they're not identifiable in any way are they well flowers in the back pocket they've all been they're bitter when they press the horn

on the car they don't do any of that no car they've all been to France yes I know these clowns and they've trained with

is it Goulier there's different there's different teams Gullier and Lecoq yeah Lecoq

like when David Bowie went to Lindsay Kemp in the 70s I don't know if you remember that okay

and so they were both I saw two in a night they were both ladies in fact is that true one the blurb said They were both, well, I saw two in a night. They were both ladies.

In fact, is that true? One, the blurb said, said neurodiverse immigrant queer clown. Sure. That was the first one. So that was Andrea. That's half the programme in the French. Yeah. And I got in and they said to me,

can you move right to the front, please? And it was her opening night and I thought, well, maybe there'll only be a front row. Maybe she, you know, I didn't know her stuff. So, of course,

it filled up and I'm in the front row with Mary, who I work with. And we're in the front row and I said, how did this happen that we're in the front row?

You know this, I mean, it's a clown. They're not going to come on and do a sort of bedroom mirror monologue. So she came on to people, everybody says I'm pretty white for a white guy. You know that song? Oh, yeah. She came on in a big nappy, a massive baby's nappy

with all these bottles and then she handed bottles out like baby's bottles one to mary and and when it went give it to me baby people had to feed her with milk that was how it started anyway that was mary i thought so far so good and then um and then mary became a character in the play. Got a name, was given a name in it. How were you feeling inwardly? I'm just thinking, you know, as we all think, you know the I'm glad it's you and not me.

And I couldn't work out whether she was mortified or secretly enjoying it. With everyone who's called into a show. Oh, this is it. But then she had to get up and play air bass on stage. I mean, she was in it. Afterwards, people were coming up, walking straight past me and going up to me and saying, I thought you were great, Michael.

Yeah, she told me the next day somebody stopped her in Edinburgh and said I thought you were great in Andreas Vista so yeah a star is born gosh

but something happened in the show which I have to tell you about because it was it was remarkable to me

and I still I'm still reliving it now so I'll tell you after this. Frank Skinner on Absolute Radio. So take us to the clowns. We're in Clowntown.

So bear in mind, it's about 11 o'clock at night, maybe after 11. Late night clowns. We're in a small studio theatre. The clown now has us in a grip. She was great. It's one of these people who felt like she might be the spawn

of the devil and then would do a really big smile that made you go, oh. Anyway, she put this band together of all air instruments and she said, we need a drummer and this guy was really keen to get up and he said, oh yeah, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

She said, okay, up you come. And he said, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. She said, okay, up you come. And he said, should I put my shades on? I thought, oh, he's got props. He's got props for it. Oh, he's come for it. Anyway, what he hadn't made allowances for is that the word stage generally implies some sort of raised platform.

And I think he thought she was at floor level. So he ran really fast to get on stage. And man, he went down hard. No. I heard the... You know that moment when the air leaves the... And the sound of him hitting the ground was... I mean, the whole place gasped.

Was it like a full pancake sort of onto chest? It was like a heavy canvas bag full of wooden spoons being thrown hard at the floor. That was the sound. And even the clown sort of dropped out of her persona

and said, are you alright? Terrible. And he did that male thing again, yeah. I'm fine. And I watched it and it was shocking. It was really shocking. He just went down with such velocity. Did he continue with the...

I mean, I've lost confidence in him as a performer. He did, but he's playing air drums, so he's got a moment to sort of get through. But I remember thinking, nothing I see at the Fringe will be as thrilling as that man falling over at such pace, so hard into the floor. Do you think in the same way that when a member of the audience

shouts a joke at us as stand-ups, that's like a heckle? It's sort of like heckling a clown to rush up and do your own incredible pratfall. Yeah, I mean, it was a pratfall, the sort of pratfall you can read about on any good Corrin's report. Did he not make a joke of it? No, but he couldn't breathe.

And he still got his shades on, but it was... He had his shades on! It was shocking. I was in Burkina Faso with Comet Relief and we were in a village sort of, this was in the age when we hadn't noticed the White Saviour thing was a bit, anyway, we were in there

and there was a wooden overhanging thing and I came striding out and hit my head really, really, you know that thing where they say see stars, but you actually do see something weird. And all the people of this village were living in terrible poverty, and the crop had been bad, and they really laughed.

And some of them pointed at me and laughed in real... Cartoon fashion. This is the international language of banging your head. You're still disgusted and handed down by the oral tradition. Yeah, I probably am, yeah. There's probably a muddle of wooden carving of me banging my enormous domed head, which they still speak of. Talking of clowns, I saw some amazing...

You know sometimes if you see literature that's very... Literature, sorry. You see litter that's very sort of thematic for where you are. Yes. Like if you were to see the scarf of the losing team in the gutter outside the stadium, and you think, oh, yeah, that fits with what's happened. Yeah.

Yesterday, I was walking along the street in Edinburgh, and I saw in the gutter, along with a load of flyers and you think, oh yeah, that fits with what's happened. Yeah. Yesterday, I was walking along the street in Edinburgh and I saw in the gutter, along with a load of flyers and other litter, a clown's nose. Oh. And I just thought, yeah, it is the fringe, isn't it? That is. Do you think that's been thrown down in dismay? I'll never equal that pratfall. Words already got around the clown community about that guy.

I love it. Frank Skinner. Absolute radio. But you may have noticed, by the way, that Pierre is a little bit gravelly today. A little croaky. Yeah, it's that time of the fringe, you see. That's right.

A few weeks in, you start to go a little bit. We're wear and tear. And it's oft discussed among comics at this point, the home remedies, the solutions. Yes. All the obvious ones, chamomile tea, lemon and honey and all that. Nah, they don't work.

Do they not? In our house, my mum would get a spoonful of butter onto a spoon, put it in the sugar bowl till it was encrusted and then we had to swallow that straight down and that was supposed to do a sore throat. Did it work? Does anything work for a sore throat?

I've had injections and sprays and all sorts. Well, you know what my parents obviously recommended? Doctor Theatre. Oh, yes. But they'd say that to you and you'd say, I've got a tummy ache and you had a cycling proficiency test. Doctor Theatre, darling. I don't think Doctor Theatre works for a throat.

It works for everything else. Yeah. I got a sort of home remedy from, years ago, from the comedian Fern Brady, who she's not at the fringe this year but she would lose her voice a week in every year without fail. So she's got this great sort of archive of

eldritch remedies and marshmallows. Oh, I think I've heard that one before. One marshmallow right before you go on. What about George Ezra told me about wearing wet socks? Hey, that's a good one. Yeah, that can't work, can it?

Are you sure he was giving you throat advice? No, he definitely was. And Bob Down, remember Bob Down, the Australian? Do you know who Bob Down is? I do not. Oh, we will tell you. I remember... There's not much to say on this.

Dennis Leary described him as wearing a beige polyester leisure suit. He wore like a safari suit. Singing Frank Sinatra songs. He was a character comedian, wasn't he? I don't know. I think he looked... We thought he was, and then we found out that's who he was. It was real.

But he said pineapple juice. That was his thing. Oh, interesting. Treat your throat like a piece of gammon. Yeah, exactly. That was when gammon was a perfectly nice word in those days. Summoned up ideas of a lovely little slice of ham. Not a raging mouth.

Oh, gammon. Yeah, it's a shame. Much maligned meat these days. It was, yeah. But I was wondering if anyone listening had any tips. Maybe there's some obscure home remedy from one of the listeners that could help me out. Friar's balsam. What did you call me?

The thing we had in the house. I'd get that seen to it by you. The thing we had in the house was a kid called Friar's balsam. I have no idea what it was. I bet it's been banned now. Yeah, probably. It would have been. It's like mighty.

Probably I'm bleaching it. But it was a black, a thick black elixir. Oh. And I wonder how many Alexas has gone on then across the country. Only in the very poshest of homes. Elixir. It must be a very difficult, if alchemists have got Alexa, they must keep saying elixir.

They must keep going, yes, what is it? No, it's an elixir! I'm nearly there with the gold! Don't interrupt me! So it was thick black... Oh, I don't think it was glass. If anyone... So, yeah, any...

If you've got any home cures, we'd like... Is that what they're called, home cures? Home remedies. Yeah, Tom Jones had special sweets he used to like. And if you know what Fryer's Balsam is, let us know about that. Oh, yeah. Yeah, thick, but like mole-lesses. Oh, like sort of gloopy.

Was it administered with a spoon, like cough syrup, or did you? It was, yeah. Oh, it was administered. Don't worry about that. Don't have any threats of non-administration. No, it was... The fact that it's not on the market now does make me think they might have found terrible stuff in it.

It's almost as if it wouldn't pass current food and drug agency tests. Yeah, those old spoiled sports. This is Frank Skinner. This is Absolute Radio. This is Frank Skinner on Absolute Radio, live from Edinburgh. I'm with Emily Dean and Pierre Novelli. You can text the show on 81215.

Follow us on X and Instagram at frankontheradio. Email via frank at absoluteradio.co.uk. And also I have another thing to read. What about that? Tickets are on sale now for Absolute Radio Live at the London Palladium. We'll be creating i'm reading this you will be creating the uk's biggest night of life comedy on sunday the 26th of november

all the profits from every ticket sold will go directly to teenage cancer trust frank skinner will be your host and we'll tell you soon who he'll be joined by I won't be telling you that because I have no idea who's on but it's always a top end Bill, you can buy your tickets from absoluteradio.co.uk slash tickets so come along and have a laugh

while raising money for a brilliant cause get them quick it says in blocked capitals at the end I think they are already selling. It's not till November the 26th. Yeah. I mean, I haven't even done my hair or anything. It's a brilliant show.

Well, it was last year, so, you know, get preparing, please. Yes. So after I'd seen Andrea Spisto, I then went and saw another female clown, by now it's five past midnight and I'm at Pierre's venue I'm at Monkey Barrel

and this was a woman called Julia Masley are you familiar with her work? Yes, Estonian Yes, Estonian. In a very, yes, in a very hot cellar.

Yes, Estonian, yeah. Sorry to interrupt, but are you pretty much 70% clowns now? I've just had a clown week. Okay. You say, I've just. So, Julia Masley wears an enormous hat, like the sorting hat from Harry Potter, and walks around with staring, very beautiful eyes.

I think it's all right to say that, because it's part of her power in the room. And her right arm is a sort of a metal lady's leg with a microphone in the end of it. And she walks up to people and goes, Problema. And they have to tell her their problems. And then she endeavours to solve them.

It's pretty good. And sometimes, like, she'll, I don't want to give away her app, but she'll go around going, Ah, ah. And people go into the mic, and she smiles, and it's a lovely moment. But occasionally, she'll go, and the person goes,

and she goes, Really, really, they are terrible. Then everyone's frightened of doing the wrong... So there's tension in the room. But she was asking people their problems, and they included, I'm hot, I'm hungry, and I have IBS. That's another one. It's a new Channel 5 show, isn't it?

Yeah, exactly. So, yeah, and she solves them. But one guy said he was missing his mum so she I think no did he anyway he ended up phoning his mum and we all thought this will be a funny

but you've seen comedians the phone calls on stage so so Julian Masley instead of going down like the comedy road said tell us about motherhood so so this woman says going down like the comedy road, said, tell us about motherhood. So this woman says,

well, it's a really marvellous thing and it changed my life. And you just, you know, you give your life to another person and all that sort of stuff. This is half-assed med, mate. By now it's caught to one. And the clown's mascara is running with tears. It's like a real wow.

The steaming, the condensation on the walls, the clown's crying. Some woman somewhere in England is saying her motherhood's really special, really special. And her son, she sounds very emotional, but it is light. And her son says, oh, by the way, Frank Skinner's in the room. Don't bring that up now. Keep me out of this.

And then Julia Massey says, my mother is here tonight. I want to talk to her. And she said, mother, what do you think of me? And her mother said, I, what do you think of me? She said that. And her mother said, I think you're a genius. And she said, Why did you say that?

I don't know what you're saying. And it was like, it was absolutely balmy. Oh my Lord. But brilliant. I really felt after, like I've been through a very special experience. So if you are up here, I would go and check it out.

I really want to go to this clown. I know a clown called Dr. Brown. He used to do workshops and he said, I remember he said to me, yeah, but you get, the trouble is you get stand-ups turning up. They've brought their ideas, their stupid verbal ideas. I thought, wow. So it's a bit of a cult thing now, the clown thing. But if you want to do it, kids, you're going to have to go to France. That's all I'm saying. That's all I'm saying.

Frank Skinner on Absolute Radio. I had my hair cut this week, can you tell? I was actually going to compliment you because it's got a lovely A.E. Houseman vibe. Thank you. It's a really, yeah, it's a good one. I went to a place called Cots with a Z. Yes, I thought so Z on South Bridge. And I was sitting to wait.

There was a lady doing the haircuts. How much? And there was a man in the chair. Have a guess. Oh, I don't know what to do. £16. I was going to go £14. Yeah, okay.

But £16, I think you got the value for money. Yeah, anyway, a man came into the shop and said, sorry, I just saw you sitting there. I just wanted to come in and shake your hand. So I said, hello, nice to meet you and all that. And he went out again. And this woman said to me, are you famous or is he a friend of yours?

And I said, I can't say I am famous. And then the bloke in the chair, who was a bloke, I suppose about my age, who looked like a hard man, like a local hard man, said, he's a very big magician. And she went, oh! And I thought, oh no, where have you taken me, mate? And she said, will you suddenly just jump up and disappear? Is that what you might?

And I said, yeah, yeah. And I thought, am I going to run with this or am I going to? He looks a bit frightened. I don't want to argue with him. You've got to go. Whatever he's saying, I'm going along with it at this point. I know, but he's giving her expectations, which I can't fulfil. Do you know what I mean?

That's a gore. Because at the end, there was a debate about cash only, and I felt she slightly tilted her head as if she wanted me to take it from behind her ear. And I never fully she kept saying, so what's the show like? And I said, well it's a comedy.

It's actually comedy. And she said, oh it's funny as well. And I thought, oh! And she was really waiting for me to do a bit of magic. You can use that for the poster, Frank. Funny as well. But how did I get into that?

That's a great hospital pass from that guy. Yeah, exactly. I love that guy. Who did he think I was? Paul Zenon. I think he saw the space for mischief. No, he didn't look like a mischief kind of a guy. Did he mistake you?

He looked like a headlock kind of a guy. Someone who might put someone in a headlock and then walk them round for a whole weekend before he released them. You don't think there's a possibility that he mistook you for a magician? I'd say that is possible. If so, which magician? A-12-15. Ali Bongo. Have you seen Ali Bongo's sort of thick horn-rimmed spectacles?

It could be Copperfield. I was introduced to Ali Bongo sort of thick horn rim spectacles. It could be Copperfield. I was introduced to Ali Bongo once. I was in my dressing room at the BBC and a knock came on the door and it was Paul Daniels. He said, I want to show you my set. I think you'll like it. And he took me in and he said, oh, here's Ali Bongo. And I was introduced on the way.

It's a fabulous passage of play. LAUGHTER on the way. It's a fabulous passage of play. Frank Skinner on Absolute Radio. Pierre was asking for sore throat remedies. Yeah. And our readers have delivered. Oh, yeah.

Tremendous. They always do, don't they? John Hopkins. Hopkins? One of our regulars. I certainly won't be offended if he doesn't try it. This is to you, Pierre.

But my nan used to swear by placing a piece of raw liver across her throat when she slept at night. How did she secure it? I suppose with a nan you could just put it into one of the folds.

Just go to the butchers. In the next morning, you wouldn't be able to tell what was liver and what was old throat. That's the only problem. Fine. Sort of tuck it in. It's all right, I've got an old throat. Like saying someone has an old soul. It is.

He's got an old throat. I find a turkey throat is for life, not just for Christmas. Well, John continues. This also, very good, this also might explain why my grandad slept in the spare room. Yeah. And John ends with... But our three dogs all slept in with Grandma.

How do you think I get Ray to stay on my bed? And John ends off with, on a slightly sinister note, Frank, bon voyage, Pierre. Ooh. Ooh. Okay. Okay, have a voyage. A suggested cure for an awfully sore throat.

Oh, very, very fine. And that's how I got sent home from the fringe. Yeah, exactly. Not sent, taken. Taken. Ultra Magnus, again, our regulars are all coming to the rescue here. Old Ma Magnus's, even older Grandma Magnus, recommends the following home remedy.

Teaspoon of sugar, pure lemon juice, honey, paracetamol, topped with hot water, and get this, our white lemonade. Our whites lemonade! Our whites lemonade. That's a great impression, very niche. Well it was, the song was done by Elvis Costello's dad who I interviewed and you realise when you hear that, this is an old advert in case you don't know it, for a lemonade. And a guy would get up at night like some sort of

drug addict in his desperation for our white lemonade. And he'd say, I'm a secret lemonade drinker. Our whites. And he did, our whites. It did sound like Elvis. He said, I'm trying to give it up, but it's one of those nights. Yeah, sure, it was lemonade.

Yeah. Our whites. but at the end, he goes, oh, it's lemonade. And he just thinks, God, Elvis has inherited his father's voice completely. I interviewed Elvis Costello's dad about that very advert. Did you? Well, do you know, it always, it's the

last time it represented the end of those men in those pyjamas. You know, the flannel, the stripy pyjamas. Well, there was Freddy Fingers, was it, in the Boomtown Rats. The keyboard player used to wear those pyjamas on stage all the time. Did your dad ever have a pair? Was it Johnny Fingers? Johnny?

One of the fingers. One of the Berkshire Fingers, if I remember rightly. Yeah, I think they were distantly related to Tom Thumb. Could be wrong. I was in a restaurant in Edinburgh. Do you know Ox 184? I have walked past it. It's very nice.

And I was in there and a woman said to me, older, I mean I say older, like in my age group, said, are you following me around? And then she showed me a photo on her phone that she took of me at an opera about a year ago with me not knowing I was being photographed. And I thought, it should be me, shouldn't it, who's saying, oh, you're following me around.

It's a very interesting thing to do. Yeah, fancy seeing you here in your bathroom. Yeah, exactly. But it's very weird that a photo, I always think all my best photos, I don't know I'm being photographed. Yes. Oh.

Was the opera one a particularly, did you ask for a copy? I didn't. That one was, that wasn't one of the best. I was just looking at my phone, like pre-opera. There was used to be,

a man who used to stand in my road behind a tree and take paparazzi shots of me every morning. This was in the white heat of my celebrity. And he did that for about three weeks, just taking loads of photos. And then one day he gave me his business card, said, if ever you wanted any of these. Really? He didn't suggest they were free.

No. No, God forbid. Oh, the tree, the tree photographer guy. What happened to him? Frank, I need to tell you about some shows I've seen. Yes. Because I've been sampling Edinburgh's wares while I've been here. I came, I'm in and out, but I came down, up, I apologise, yesterday,

with Ray, and on the train, Ray caused such a sensation. Ray, in case you're new, is Emily's dog. Yeah. He was walking up and down, he was getting applause. What? They were shouting at him, they were going, Raymond! Honestly. Really?

Applause breaks? Yeah. It's not even up at the fringe. They're at that. He's not even up at the Fringe. They're at that. Isn't that even doing a work in progress show? I remember Jimmy Carr telling me, Jimmy Carr said I did a charity event for Bruce Springsteen in America. And I got...

I think Bruce is doing all right, Jimmy. Yeah. I think it was organised by him. Please give generously. And he said I got 14 applause breaks. Oh, come on. And all I'm thinking is, I'll accept that you got 14, but who counts them? Who is that person who thinks, you know, the clicker in the hand.

Like a bouncer. Wow, yeah. Also, I think we need to establish some sort of international exchange rate between American applause breaks and British ones. Yeah, exactly. It's like dog years. He got two. He got two applause breaks in the UK.

At best. They're like Zimbabwean dollars over there. That's a very Pierre Novelli comparison. Only Pierre. So one woman did say though, what did you think of this, guys? I wanted to run this past you. It's a potential opener when you're meeting someone.

She went to stroke him and then she paused and she said, is it nice? Oh. And at first I was a bit offended and then I thought, actually, that's a reasonable question to ask. And I think if someone, for example, if I introduced Frank to someone, I said, this is Frank Skinner, and they said, is it nice? Yeah, I'd be okay with that.

I would say it's not only nice, it's a master craftsman. Oh, yes, well, there you go. Do you think that's reasonable? I'll tell you what I've learnt from people approaching my own dog is the back of the hand. You give the dog the back of the hand first and it's non-threatening. They have a sniff at that and then you can

gradually turn the hand and do the little tickle under the chin. It's quite regal, isn't it? I do that with humans. Yeah, but for some reason they're not threatened by the back of the hand whereas, you know, in actual human terms, you say, yeah, I'll give him the back of my hand.

But, you know, I've never slapped, I'll give him the back of my hand. But, you know, I've never slapped. You wouldn't slap a dog like that. No. For insolence. For any reason. Can we just clarify? No, I'd never. Or maybe, I don't know, if it was hysterical

and I was in a black and white British movie from the 50s, I might have to slap its face. People got so slapped about in those movies if they got hysterical. But for a very low bar of hysteria as well. Oh, man. Someone would go, well, that's terrible. Now, see here, calm down.

Well, pull yourself together, why don't you? Sometimes you get like three or four real quick ones. Have they ever waited to see if the hysteria's dipped after the first one? I suspect there was no stunt person either. No, that's a person who's just been waiting for an opportunity. Frank Skinner. Frank Skinner. Absolute radio. Absolute radio.

Boys, can I tell you about a séance I went to yesterday in Edinburgh? A séance? Was it for someone's career uh a victorian type seance i mean is there any other kind really i don't even know if people still have them i don't know much about um the ages of seance seances through the ages have they changed much well the one i went to yesterday, it's called Seance. Keep it simple, everyone. It's in a shipping... They had a massive one at Tottenham Hotspur's football.

Oh, no, that was Beyoncé. Beyoncé, I get mixed up. Sorry, carry on. I don't think I can. Okay. There's a big sign outside. It's in a shipping container and I like that. Oh, yeah, one of those.

So it's one of those 20-minute shows. Oh, is it really? Love that. Go in. Before you get too excited, I worry for you, but we'll get to that. It's a bit of a fright fest, Frank. Yes, I can't cope with the macabre. 20 minutes, though.

Pop in, chat to the dead. Yeah, but, you know. Well, that's why I wouldn't worry about you. Yeah, but do they stay in the container? That's what worries me.

Or do they drift home after you? Also, the trouble is, because of all their cumbersome clothes throughout the ages, it just gets a bit

hot and uncomfortable and their ruffled blouses and... I thought they were naked. No, they're not. We've established this, right? My problem with ghosts is how does, how does, And they're ruffled blouses. I thought they were naked. No, they're not.

We've established this, right? That's my problem with ghosts. How does a 1987 M&S blue nylon cardigan live on? Well, the sales, you get into the shipping container. There's about 12 or 13 of you. I imagine it's probably 13. And there's a long white dining table. Yes. Well, there's a table or 13 of you I imagine it's probably 13 and there's a long white dining table yes well there's a tablecloth on it

and you put the headphones on and the lights go off headphones? headphones goes pitch black oh that's doesn't that allow ghost FM

skulldoggery well surely you suddenly hear a man in your you know in your ear and he's saying, I told you to put your hands on the table.

It's your fault. It's your fault. And I, for some reason, instinctively, sort of shouted, I am putting them on the table. And I could feel the man next to me shuffling with embarrassment. Because he hadn't. He probably heard me say that. I don't think you're meant to shout out and respond. Do you remember that moment

on, they had a Michael Jackson seance on one of the shows, and one of the guys, one of the guys trying to contact him was a Michael Jackson impersonator. This is Derek Okora, by the way, wasn't it? Yeah, Derek Okora. And this guy turned up

in the full Michael Jackson thing he wears on stage. And there's a bit said, we need to put our hands on the table. He's sort of closer, but the hand's going to the centre of the table, and one comes in in a white sequined job. Oh, well, this sounds already terrifying.

But the Tam O'Shanta's come in, hasn't it? The Tam O'Shanta has come in, but we'll... I mean, not into the seance. No, interesting. Tam O'Shanta, of course, the Robert Burns poem, is all about a drunken man going past the church and seeing ghouls dancing in the night, and they follow him.

It's a winner. Frank Skinner on Absolute Radio. This is Frank Skinner on Absolute Radio with Emily Dean and Pierre Novelli. Text the show on 81215. Follow us on X and Instagram. I still can't say it with a straight face. None of us care.

At frankontheradio. Email via frankatabsoluteradio.co.uk. We're mid-seance. I'm already frightened. Just the idea of this freaks me out myself. With the headphones. Just anything. Just being in a container trying to contact the dead.

Do you know, as I was in the shipping container, with the headphones on, hearing strange things. Put your hands on the table. It's not unlike this radio show in many ways. Yes. But I did think of you, Frank, and I thought, not one for Frank, this. No. And I thought, Pierre, you could handle yourself.

I think he'd remonstrate with them and say, look, mate, a joke's a joke, you're frightening people now. The only way I'm ever going to get to a seance is from the other direction. Because I'm just sort of a gag. I'm sort of a really good gag in the other world and i just yeah yeah well i need to share start flickering light bulbs and stuff yes the light was a bit it was quite troubling because the man's voice gets more persistent and louder again not unlike this radio show but he hisses and then it's very personal because you've got the headphones on.

And he says, it's all your fault. It's all your fault. You've made this happen. And there's whooshing. I mean, I don't want to... I'm trying to avoid that for the month I'm away from home. And... I like just having your Bluetooth.-a-tooth in.

So I was getting very frightened. Oh, you were. You admit it. Yeah, you don't. What is this, some strange law court? You admit it, do you? I thought you were pretty impervious to these. Well, I am normally, but honestly, there was one point and there was creaking footsteps like...

of a floorboard and then glass shattering. Do you get floorboards in a ship container? No, but in my head, I wasn't in the shipping container. I see. And so I did, again, slightly embarrassingly, I did feel myself at one point go, I couldn't help it. Yeah. I mean, I hope other people were doing the same thing,

but it felt, I was gripping on. I don't understand the headphones, though. I thought it was like a communal thing. Well, it is communal, but it's... It sounds like a sort of immersive experience. It's immersive. So the idea that it's atmospheric. If we had some old actor sort of wandering up and down,

it's not going to be the same because I'll be looking at his shoes and I'll just be thinking, no, I'm not in a Victorian sales. Whereas this, it allows, you transport yourself. But what else? Are you asked if you want to contact someone or any of that stuff? Yes, they mention names. And they say, do you know someone called Matthew?

Yes. And I say, no. And I hear other people say, yes, yes, I know a Matthew. And I keep saying no. I'll tell you, a guy told me he saw one in Leicester. And he was struggling. He was going, gee, there's a G in it. Graham, is it?

Not nobody, nobody in the audience. Eventually he was going, D, I've got the letter D. I think, Dad? Now, you are really desperate when you've gone to Dad. I could do that. That's very Aquarian. I should say that this, they go, I don't want to spoil it for people, Frank,

which is why I'm being a bit sort of vague about it, but what I would say, I think you would find it frightening. However, you would love it, I think, Pierre. What do you think? He'd be very analytical, wouldn't he, Pierre? Well, there's slightly... I think you'll find that's the wrong dialect for this. Just ruin it for everyone.

And also, if I went to a shipping container, I want us all to sit around and say, I think Britney Spears should go out with Harry Styles. I'm going to describe it. Shipping. Oh, I love it. Oh, Frank is so modern. No, I did that because I could see if I wasn't laughing.

I thought, she needs a footnote. Oh. I'm going to describe it as exhilarating, fascinating, a little bit spooky. Can I ask you one question without spoiling it? Yes. Did you see anything? You don't have to say what it was, but did you see anything that might have been supernatural?

I might have. I might have actually got a hint of something. Okay. Or it was my watch. Did it involve bedclothes? No, it wasn't a Scrooge in a nightcap. No, I'm thinking of the sheet over there. You know, the old sheet over there.

Did I see the Reebok trainer poking through? The ruined sheet with the two eye holes. The Reebok trainer is exactly it, like you're saying. We always talk, you're on the ghost train, you're trying to get involved, and then you see the glimpse of the Reebok trainer is exactly it. We always talk you're on the ghost train you're trying to get involved and then you see the glimpse of the Reebok trainer. It is very earthly the Reebok trainer.

Way too earthly. We've had Colonel Spud who's one of our regulars. Oh, Colonel Spud. Is that the Colonel Sanders in his earlier vegetarian phase? I'll tell you what it is. It's a collab between KFC and Spud You Like, I think.

Spud You Like. Do you remember Spud You Like? Recently, I would say I hadn't had a jacket potato for 10 years. And I went on holiday to... Great start. Yeah. Yeah. To bury St Edmund's teeth, yeah.

I feel that there are some statistics that sums a man up. That's one. My problem is I started microwaving them rather than ovening them for speed. And I don't like the sinuous base. I don't like the wrinkly layers either. Honestly, I could have cut the bottoms off those microwaved jacket potatoes

and used them as coasters. And you would. Yeah. In my outdoor furniture, they still wouldn't have perished in the weather. Sort of early man coaster. Exactly. So I was in the berries at Edmonds.

I went to a cafe and then got anything I liked and I thought, oh God, I'll have a jacket potato. And it was absolutely fantastic. I was away for six days. I had five jacket potatoes in various venues. Oh, wow. Yeah, I just thought, this is, man. What a day.

Since I got back, I haven't had one. So it's just a Barry St Edmunds treat for you. I forgot how brilliant, they are brilliant when they're done without the sinuous base. What are you when you don't cook them? Yeah, well, I could do them in the oven. I once had a strange four-pronged thing that looked a bit like something you might dry very small washing on. And you put a potato on each spike

and because the whole frame got hot... Are you familiar with these? My mother used to eat... It was a large spike medieval torture instrument. Yes. Oh, I see. So because the metal getting hot, is it within the potato?

Yeah, exactly. It was an early shot. Whoa, Frank, we're not letting that pass. Let's return to potate. Just a bit of fun. It was an early shot at the microwave. The idea of heating from within.

From the potate. Yeah. Has anyone, regarding Spud, you like YOY? I feel like no one really capitalised on the jacket, tuxedo Has anyone, regarding Spud you like, why oh why, I feel like no one really capitalised on the jacket tuxedo element. There's so much scope there. You've got Colonel Sanders.

Why didn't they have a black silk tuxedo over the potato? Don't you think it would have been a lovely marketing? The truth is the jacket potato is not a great name. That's why I think. The potato doesn't have a great physique. It's a suit, isn't it? They're missing a chance to sort of, with a scalpel one could fashion lapels from here. No, but it's a whole suit.

You would need one section of the potato to be peeled for it to be a jacket. Also, it's going to look a bit bodybuilder in a tuxedo. Yeah, it is. With that frame. It's going to be a bit Daniel Craig in a suit. It's a bit Dan Craig. It's going to be England rugby team on sports personality of the year.

It's going to be size 19 collar. It's going to be have that look to it. Tiny little Drew despicable me. How did we get on to Jacket Potato? Oh, we got on to Potatoes. From seances, of course. We got on to, no,

we got on to Potatoes. Well, they're all buried. Hold on, the time's out. Frank Skinner on Absolute Radio. Frank, you may recall we went off on something of a tangent.

You did. How dare you. Proud to have, actually. But Colonel Spud called us. Colonel Spud didn't call us because potatoes can't use the phone. Colonel Spud messaged us and said, I hope you didn't swallow the old, A-U-L-D, Friar's Balsam, Frank.

Well, I certainly did. We used to use it as an inhalation, having poured boiling water onto a dollop of the gloop in a... Oh, I'm afraid... Oh, my God. I used to just drink it off a spoon. Yes. I'm afraid... But anyway, here I am.

Well, what Colonel Spud poured it into, I would have to check with the producer whether I'm allowed to even mention this implement, but it's used by students a lot for recreational purposes, OK? A traffic code? No. I think people will know. Of a kind.

Yes. I walk round Edinburgh and think, yeah, we've seen the traffic cone on the statue's head joke now. Relax with it. Did everyone do traffic cone as a student? Did you do it? Yeah. Yeah.

Well, we... We did. I don't know if we had traffic cones when I was a student. Or did you have horse and car? The horses were alarmed. But there's still up here, every statue has got a traffic cone hat, and you think, oh, really?

Did you put a man with a big red flag on top of statues? Yeah, exactly. Yeah, I did in 1917, when we were there in St Petersburg. Sorry, carry on. Colonel Spod then continues, 1917, when we were there in St Petersburg. Sorry, carry on. Colonel Spud then continues, it's since been banned as carcinogenic.

Has it really? So no surprise there. And then... Almost everything I ate as a child has been banned for some health reason. Yeah. Raw sausages now. When's the last time you saw kids on public transport eating a raw sausage?

I'd assume it was some sort of performance art. I've got to say, I don't recall the sort of halcyon days of come and eat your raw sausage, children. I can still remember sliding the finger and thumb up the skin of the sausage to get the last bits of raw meat out. Honestly. We did now. Memoir of a goblin of some kind.

I'd read that book. You are. I'd read the memoir of a goblin. Actually, you probably did read it in your fantasy. In my studies of days. I bet you've read a few of those. I'd like the author photograph of the goblin, Frank. Yeah, turtleneck, pipe.

Yeah, goblin off duty, maybe. Yes, contemplative goblin. With a black polo neck. Yeah, looking out for a park. And just in this, Colonel Spud signs off with this absolutely, I mean, this is life-changing, this piece of news. P.S., with one P.S., Colonel Spud signs off with this absolutely, I mean, this is life-changing, this piece of news. P.S., with one P.S., Colonel Spud has changed. I mean, it's Colonel's Pud.

Colonel's Pud. I'm sticking with Spud. So there's an apostrophe in the... Yeah. I can't really talk about it. It's really upset me. Yeah. I'm't really talk about it. It's really upset me. Yeah. I'm edgy about it.

Also, Rob Davenport has got in touch. I've asked AI for an image of Frank doing magic. I will be sharing that with the world shortly. I must try. One of these things that people say to me, I asked AI for a giant monkey on the front of a building and it just sent me. Yeah.

Actually, you don't need one of those. I went to House of Ours. Have you been there in this festival? What's that? It's got the best signage I've ever seen, like a giant, giant monkey on the front of the building. I'm going to put a photo up. Part of my act.

And I'll tell you what, I saw the listies there. They were the best children's act in the world. And the whole finale was about the undulating giants. You know the things we've been talking about?

Yeah. It was, they dressed up as them. They had about three on stage. I saw them flyering and initially I thought there's an undulating giant. Yeah.

But then I saw human legs underneath. Yeah, they dressed us. We're talking about those things that car dealerships have that hot air is fired through them and they're like tall men. I tied with the idea of when I become old and lonely of having one of those and also a fire which were the flames of those things from air beneath as well,

just orange linen, orange and linen, yellow linen. That's my dream. This is Frank Skinner. This is Absolute Radio. In terms of spectacles we have witnessed at the Fringe, I was taken along by a friend of mine to see a Norse mythology-themed wrestling evening. Oh, okay. I think I might have seen them out on the street,

looking Norse. Yeah, Mythos Ragnarok is what it's called. Oh, excellent. Yeah, it's very, it's proper wrestling. It sounds so like Disney made- up language in a fantasy film. Well, Ragnarok's a real thing. Yes, I've heard of that. It's very real, especially if you go see this.

You'll come out believing. So what happens? So they've got it set up like a proper WWE wrestling show with a sort of special floor that you can slam people on and all the big platform and things. What, a know, that you can slam people on. Yeah. And all the big platform and things. What, a ring, do you mean? It's sort of a raised cube. It's in an enormous old church, so it's very atmospheric and spooky.

Right, okay. I wouldn't approve of wrestling in the church. Well, I don't know. I think I seem to remember that, who was it that wrestled an angel for about an hour oh there was one wasn't it michael very specific an hour but yeah anyway that happened um what it did in our house so i went along obviously thinking this is something that I studied or studied to an extent,

what I would do and what I'm expecting. What, wrestling? Yeah, yeah. You did a degree in wrestling. I don't know if we... I have a BW, Bachelor of Wrestling. I went and I thought, well, what I would do, because some of the mythology can be quite, you know,

fiddly and elaborate. And I thought, well, they're going to cut it right down. They're going to simplify. Yeah. And they're just going to get on with the wrestling. Yeah. Boy, was I wrong. I'd met the guy who directs and writes the whole thing,

and stages the whole thing afterwards and chatted to him. My word, a loyalty to the original Snorri Sturluson texts. Oh, wow. Would put a smile on the face of the most pedantic academic. That sounds great. It was brilliant. I thought it was just going to be some dressing for a wrestling match. Dressing for wrestling?

Yeah. Good album. Yeah. No, I thought, even if they go a bit detailed they're not going to go beyond the big hitters you've got your ode and you've got your thor you're loki you're loki he's there but no they start from the very beginning where odin is a sort of under god and has to establish himself odin origin story fantastic that sounds brilliant yeah highly recommended and my god there's an enormous man.

A couple of them. Well, that was you. Well, I was there in proportion. I looked like an enthusiastic 10-year-old. Did you not feel you were with your people? No, these are true giants. I think I saw one of these men in the street. He did look absolutely enormous.

Yes, there's one who I chatted to afterwards. He looked like if it got really hot, you could sit in the shade of his breast muscles. I've done that with the world's strongest men, as you know. I bet you have, yeah. What else have you done with them? Well, I'll tell you off there. But these are what I call toilet breakers.

Yes, yes. As opposed what I call toilet breakers. Yes. Yes. As opposed to like a toilet break. No, because they do break toilets. Yeah, I'm sure they do. So there's plenty of myth in it. Oh, they're declaring all the complicated, from the milky breath of the first man did spring.

Yeah, no, they really go for it. I think you'd like that. It makes a change from ask him ref, ask him, which was the wrestling I saw as a boy. No, no. That's all I ever remember any of them saying. Though I did see Miss Cleopatra fight in Birmingham

at the Who's Miss Cleopatra? It was a wrestler. And at one point Miss Cleopatra said he's cheating me. I mean he's just cheating all the time. I thought what part of Egypt does that accent

come from? But no, I used to be a live wrestling enthusiast. I think you'd love this, watching Loki absolutely slam a frost giant into the decking. But he is a frost, he is part frost giant, isn't he? Oh, they deal with all the lineages. Okay, lovely. You sold it to me.

Frank Skinner on Absolute Radio. Ain't it lovely? You sold it to me. Frank, you were talking about sausages. Yes. Specifically the uncooked variety, which you were a huge fan of as a child. Well, I wouldn't do it now and I wouldn't give them to my own child, but when I was a child we used to eat raw sausages as one would eat a Salera. A Salera, yeah. What about when your Terry came home

and your dad said he'd changed because he bought toothpaste? Well he bought a toothbrush, which we all gathered round. And what did your dad say again? He said he's changed. Yeah, we've lost him. That was what he said. The bright lights. The bright lights.

Oh, man. The bright lights. So, Jill has got in touch. She's from West Brom. Okay. Jill of West Brom. Yeah. She says, which I like in a slightly Chaucerian way.

Yeah. There's nothing like raw sausage. See, it must be a Midlands thing. I don't know if we had gas in the 70s. I suspect you did. We did after we ate those sausages. I was going to say, dark heated. My mum never cooked a full pack of sausage,

as I'd been at all eight of them. Yeah. When I lived in Wensbury, I also invented sushi. Extraordinary. As we used to have cod on a Friday I don't think it was a Wensbury a cuisine and I was also compelled to cut small pieces

off from the cod to eat without cooking them first I believe when West Bromwich Albion formed they had to walk to Wensbury as a team to buy a football because that was the nearest available football. Anyway, that's that.

So speaking of football, we should again say, of course, it is the World Cup final, which is very, very exciting. And there's talk that if Gareth Southgate resigns Serena Vigman might get the job, why? Why would she want that? Let's go to a team Let's go to a team who's

less success was less recent than Sgt Pepper's Why would you do it? Well, of course, there is one reason she might do it, and that is that apparently Serena gets 400,000 a year, which is obviously great money, but Gareth gets 4 million for the same job.

Do you think that she would be able to sort of quite smugly say, if it comes home, she can say, well, I've done that. I've won the biggest thing, so now it's time to take on a sort of fixer-upper team. Yes. Do what I can. Yeah, maybe.

But I think the idea of going to a less lesser team is a strange thing. But then, you know what, Frank? 30 years of hurt never stopped me. Dreaming! Could you get me a cab back to Richmond, dear? So, look, yes, we continue to be in Edinburgh next week. I said, me and Pierre were talking about the fact

that we can't remember anything about home. We've always been here, Mr Torrance. Exactly. Can I please tell people to see a great thing called Grown-Up Orphan Annie? I'm not being paid, I just loved it. And it's one for Frank, OFF. Well, Annie's perhaps my favourite musical.

Also, it's about a washed-up child star taken financial advantage of by her parents. Really? Imagine. It's all a bit Gary Coleman. The next episode of Frank Skinner's Poetry Podcast. Frank Skinner's Poetry Podcast, did you say?

I like it, I like it. Thank you, Gerry, for your support. We'll be out on Wednesday. It's about Percy Bysshe Shelley and I reveal in there the first time I ever came across Shelley's poetry

it was being read out loud on stage by Mick Jagger he is dead he doth not sleep he hath awakened from the dream of life Keith Richards yeah

he hasn't awakened yet. So you can download that from wherever you get your podcasts. Thank you so much for listening to us this morning. We love you all. And if the good Lord spares us and the creeks don't rise,

we'll be back again this a time next week. This a time. We'll be back this a time next week. You're getting your tutti frutti ice cream. Now get out.