The Glass Cannon Podcast - Gatewalkers Episode 10 – Dancers in the Dark

Episode Date: November 17, 2023

With more vanquished fey at their feet, the heroes continue looking for Bolan in the gnome stronghold. Watch the video here: https://youtu.be/_OzJ422nNiE This episode was sponsored by Demiplane, Foundry VTT and Norse Foundry. Check out Demiplane's Pathfinder Nexus and character creation tools at https://bit.ly/GCNOfficialTools See why tabletop gamers everywhere have made the switch to Foundry Virtual Tabletop at https://foundryvtt.com/gcp Visit https://trymiracle.com/GCP to claim a free 3-piece towel set and save over 40% off. Visit https://zbiotics.com/GCP to get 15% off your first order when you use code GCP at checkout. Visit https://manscaped.com and use code GCP to get 20% off and free shipping. For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com and for hundreds of hours of exclusive shows and benefits, make your membership official and join Glass Cannon Nation today by becoming a subscriber at jointhenaish.com. Watch new episodes when they premiere every Thursday at 8PM ET on youtube.com/theglasscannon. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You are listening to the Glass Cannon Network, the premier source for role-playing game entertainment. Last week on the Glass Cannon Podcast. Let's talk about your options right now. The heroes continued their search. There was a rope bridge leading west to a single door. I don't remember if you've explored that area or not. They specifically wanted us not to. Yeah, they said it was locked off. Don't go that way.

Deep within the forest stronghold. There's something in there. I'm gonna open the door. Is everyone ready? I'm ready. I ready my bow, pointing at the door. Where fairy guardians sprang to attack. And it just goes crazy.

It says, I butter your muffin. What strange creatures. These creatures are so weird. After stamping out a magical frenzy. So she misses the first one, but that second one, right in that little butthole thing that it shot the. Oh, my God. You can't run in the butthole.

Right in the butthole. Yeah. You shot it. Punch that bee in the face my god the heroes found more secrets to uncover there is a wicker basket suspended from ropes that lead up to a hole in the ceiling does it look like a pulley system? The adventure continues. Troy needs a week to think about that. I haven't read that. No. Thank you. Rockin' around the Christmas tree

at the Christmas party hop. It is mid-December here. Glass Cannon Network Network No fucking more No more Moratorium Only two more weeks No No more weeks

No more mention of fucking Christmas Ever again What happened on Christmas? You fucking ruined it You ruined it You killed it I used to love Christmas You fucking ruined it

I ruined it Right in front of me Over the course of several fucking years. You killed Christmas. Oh my God. I killed Christmas. You loved it so much. You snapped its neck.

I snapped its neck inside of your heart. You know what? It didn't even bother me until like we were doing Legacy and Nick Lowe was just like, what the fuck? Like, cause we were talking about the weather and stuff. It's like you assholes talk about the weather, holiday seasons, like way too much. Yeah.

Like, you know what? You're right. And that's coming from Nick Lowe. He doesn't like Christmas either now? No, he's the nicest, nicest man alive. And he thinks you're ruining a lot of things. Wow. Other people.

My, my request would be that we talk about anything else in the world. Like we pretend time doesn't exist while we're in this room? All I do is I sing a little ditty and then we move on. We barely talk about it. If it were up to me, the whole hour would just be Christmas. Just sing your song. I'm going to take my phones out.

I already sang it. I start the episode with a little ditty. I don't know what you're saying. For all he knows, you're talking about a Christmas tree. He has no idea. All I'm saying is, you can't take the Christmas away from me. Alright, I'm sorry I yelled. I know you enjoy Christmas. Yeah, Skid, you're forgetting the one important

thing here, which is Troy is the only person in the world. Yeah. Well, I just think you have to remember, like being a parent, we're doing it for the kids. We're doing it for the niche. We're doing it for them. Do it for them. They want this? It's not for me. I didn't sign up for that.

It's not for you either. I don't think they sign up for that either. I get emails daily from niche members. It's like they're writing Dear Santa. They say, Dear Troy, and it's written in a crayon on a piece of paper, and they Photoshop it and email it to me. Dear Troy, I've had a really tough year, and I love the opening of your November and December shows, because sometimes I forget that the greatest time of year is when we think about giving to others

and not just giving to ourselves. And you remind me of that every time I sit down to listen to any episode of the Glass Cannon podcast. And then you mail them back coal. And then I say, don't thank me. Thank Jesus. Oh, wow. You know that lying is bad and you don't get any gifts on Christmas. I'm not lying. If you're a little boy who lies, you don't get any gifts. I get people slide into my DMMS with, uh, just thanks.

Just pure thanks for reminding them of the true meaning of Christmas. But if skid doesn't like it, then I will just continue to do it. Quietly. Do you ignore the people who slide into your DMS about Christmas? It's the same way you ignore everybody else. I, I know what, I don't understand the question. I honestly just, it would be refreshing at the end of the year to talk about anything else,

anything else. If there's so many options of things, there's so many things like what we can talk about. I mean, we could talk about the weird little airplanes before we went on the air. No, no, no,

no, no, no, no. I have a bad topic. It's Christmas time. Got her. What's the topic, Troy? Let's go. No, I'm just saying that like the bit is I sing a little song and then we move on.

We barely talk about Christmas. Although on the episode that drops on December 23rd, I was hoping we could talk 10 minutes about Christmas. But I guess now we can't. I mean, people are welcome to listen back to the dozens and dozens of hours of Christmas discussion of former Christmas cheer. I'm going to find a way to make this work so that everyone will be happy. All right.

You have to fix Christmas, especially me. This is going to be the story. You're going to have the Troy saved Christmas. You're going to have to return to your hometown and reconnect with somebody from your past. No, we did this last episode. Yeah, we Saved Christmas. You're going to have to return to your hometown and reconnect with somebody from your past. No, we did this last episode. Yeah, we're just repeating. No, this is what's going to happen.

So many things. I've got to go visit. Skid's going to leave the show, and I've got to go to, he's going to move back to Denver, and I've got to fly to Denver to try and convince him of the true meaning of Christmas, and then we'll fall in love with each other. I like Christmas just fine.

I just don't need to discuss it. Do you think it has anything to do with the fact that it's late September and we're doing this? If we were recording this like we used to closer to the actual day, do you think you'd be able to tolerate it? No, that's the thing. I think that because it is late September and knowing that this won't stop

here, like this will keep happening for the next three months. What are you going to do when we record Closer to Christmas but that's going to air after? I've thought about this. I've got to just talk about it leading up to the show but not during the show. Because again, it's not

for me. It's for America. And only America. Oh my god. Here's my bank question. BLTs, overrated, underrated, rated. Or rated. Or rated. Do you use like Google icebreakers?

This is going to get controversial. Let me tell you. He does. Let me tell you why. I'm convinced he knows. I did not. I had a BLT recently, and my wife and I went through a bit of a BLT craze

a couple of years ago. I remember that and she was like hey you want to do blts tomorrow night remember when we did those i was like yeah i'm going to wegmans i'll get i'll get the ingredients the greeds as i call it b and the l on the t oh if only that was all that went on our blt so again i'm something else i'm burying i'm getting ahead of myself overrated underrated underrated, or rated? Joe, BLT? Well, it just, for me... Why do I start with you?

It depends so enormously on the quality of the tomato. He's going to delay. If you have a middling tomato... He's going to delay. I delay questions. I ready my action to punch Troy. When it comes around to me, just you wait. Let's imagine it's a great...

I'm not saying, like, a BLT, but you don't know about the quality of the tomato. Just imagine a normally made good BLT. It's a good BLT. Joe's imagining being in a restaurant. Ordering a BLT. You can come, it can be very rated. Or it can be like, holy shit, this is fantastic. I'd say on average, I guess they're rated okay all right rated

matthew imagine that you weren't a weird vegetarian and you ate bacon see i was going to be generous in the way i answered this question now i'm going to say blt fantastic sandwich i missed them all right you just have an lt someone stamps laurence taylor's face on the bridge kate coming off tackle you have an answer for this it's the other very popular opinion that i have similar to i don't fucking watch movies because they're too long i don't like bacon so doesn't like bacon doesn't like crispy fries. A hush falls over. Did you hear just the silence? Fuck bacon.

Is it the crispiness? Come on. It's one thing not to like it. You don't have to disparage a whole people. Is it the crispiness? Because you don't like crispy fries. I just don't like the taste. It's the taste.

The flavor of bacon. Salt? When I worked at a place that sold tacos, sometimes we'd make specials and I'd try it and I'd be like, this would be a great special if you did not put bacon in it. I do agree that bacon has become like, it elevates the food. Like you add bacon to burgers, you add bacon to so many things. And I'm like,

I don't think it elevates the food. I think it just makes it taste like bacon. Right. Yeah. Which is delicious. And so fine. I think a piece of bacon and a bloody Mary, you're telling me that's not the great.

No, it belongs in certain places in a bloody Mary is one of them. No, Mary, you're telling me that's not the greatest? No, it belongs in certain places. And a Bloody Mary is one of them. No. No? No, no bacon. If somebody put bacon in your Bloody Mary, you'd be like, no, thank you. What about no bacon?

You would throw the whole Bloody Mary in there. See, this is another. Not only does Michael eat my crispy fries and leave me with the soggy ones, as intended, he'll also eat the bacon that I don't fucking want. What a wonderful relationship you guys have. Match made in heaven. What about turkey bacon? What? What's the flavor?

If you don't like bacon. I don't like pork belly. I don't like ham. I don't like bacon. No, no, no. That's what I'm saying. But turkey bacon is turkey. But that's just like wrong. All right.

So overrated. BLTs are overrated. Yeah. Don't like it. Why are you breathing like that? Because he wants someone to say underrated. Sydney, ready to action. He's desperate.

Oh, wait. No, I'm not desperate. I just really want you to be honest with me. Is it my turn? Yeah. Punch. I'm ready to punch. You're ready to punch?

Wow. And finally skip. So anticlimactic. Free action. Can I talk about it? Do you like them? Or you think more people should like them? Or like, eh, enough with the BLTs.

I'll be honest. I wasn't a huge sandwich person. I never understood sandwich culture. It wasn't a go-to meal or snack for me. Now I've become more of a sandwich person, dating Xavier, who really likes sandwiches. We go to Italian delis and we get crazy soppressata, whatever, whatever. go to like Italian delis and we get, you know, crazy soppressata, whatever, whatever. I think at this point in my sandwich career, I think they are overrated. They are a minimal sandwich, which I appreciate. But like Joe said, if the bacon isn't good bacon, the tomato isn't good

tomato, you have nothing. You have a shitty, shitty sandwich made with like breakfast ingredients that you're using. Yeah. Like you can have an Italian hoagie with not very good tomato on it and it'll be just fine. Yeah. But like it is so reliant on these three ingredients. I'm also like bacon can be really bad. Are you guys a crispy or soggy bacon? That's the other question. I like the soggy bacon.

I don't mind soggy, fatty bacon. We call it chewy. Yeah. Soggy, soggy, ruined. Soggy. No, I want drenched. I want my bacon. I don't mind soggy, fatty bacon. We call it chewy, not soggy, soggy ruined. No, I want drenched. I want my bacon soggy. I actually don't like teeth-shattering,

crispy bacon. But on a BLT, do you need it crispier? No? I don't eat BLTs because they're overrated. I guess so. Skid?

Well, I think at this festive time of year, food and family is so important. I just, I always think back to sitting under a Christmas tree and seeing that little BLT wrapped up in a bow. Remember when you used to act? It's just what I wanted. Yeah, it's just really beautiful.

The smell of Christmas. Bacon. Bacon under the tree. Bacon under the tree. So rated, underrated? I don't know. You don't care. What was the question? I think they're underrated. Yeah, I underrated? I don't know. You don't care. What was the question? I think they're underrated. Yeah, I knew you.

Of course you did. That's why you brought it up. A good BLT is among the finest things in the world. You can't, I mean, it's going back to simpler times. Caveman days. Cavemen enjoyed a BLT. I don't think they can make bread. You would have, so we make it.

That's really offensive. My father was a caveman. they can make bread. You would have... So we make it. That's really offensive. My father was a caveman. Sourdough bread. They didn't have pigs to farm. You get a nice... They can make bread. We'll deal with this in a second. Sourdough bread.

Nice sourdough bread. Mayo. Maybe Duke's. Maybe Hellman's. Doesn't matter. I know how to make a BLT. Lettuce, tomato, bacon, American cheese. That's not a BLT.

Yeah, that's a different sandwich. BLT can be anything you want. That's not. You have to have the BLT. That's why it's a silly conversation. It's like saying burgers. Overrated? Underrated?

There's a million different ways you can have a burger. What you just described is a cabilt. Well, we used to make something at work called a blogat, which was bacon, lettuce, onion, goat cheese, avocado, and tomato. So that's a different sandwich. That sounds good. But they're all a BLT family. They are all in the BLT family.

The only requisite of a BLT is that it has B, L, and T. So a bacon cheeseburger is in the BLT family. Bad example. Wow. No,burger is in the BLT family. Bad example. Wow. No, that's Matthew. Because now that crosses over into burger territory. The minute you put a patty on there, it's a burger. You're talking about a phylum.

You're not talking about a family. Yeah, this has become like a Venn diagram with 30 circles. I think my friendship with all of you is overrated. I thought you were going to unleash. I was like, oh, well, maybe Trey has some, you know, revolutionary BLT ingredient. Maybe he does something fun with the mayo. Maybe he mixes in a little,

I don't know. Chipotle mayo. Yeah, maybe he does something a little spicy, or maybe something. He puts American cheese on it and makes a different sandwich. We're fighting

and it's Christmas. He just said his friendship with us was overrated. He's the meanest one at the table. The show is canceled. Christmas is canceled.

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Troy, come out. BLT was the last straw. Troy, we talked and we all agree BLTs are underrated. And we're sorry. And we underrated. And we're sorry. And we love Christmas. And we want to, give us a song. Give us a nice little holiday. Give us a song, Troy.

I'd love to hear a Christmas song. Come on, Troy. We'll sing it with you. I just want to say, look how he's broken. What if we all started singing it? He's broken you like horses. Maybe we'll raise him from the dead. Oh, yeah.

Let's all sing and we'll get Troy to come back. Oh, King Wenceslas, look down on the feast of Stephen. Oh, the snow was long and brown, deep and crisp and even. Do you hear the music? Round of BLTs for my Christmas friends. BLT shots all around. I'm much more concerned about how I'm going to open the next two shows than I am this show. No, look, don't go ahead.

Do your Christmas thing. Don't let the fact that it makes me want to kill myself stop you. Thank you. I want you to do what makes you happy. Don't think about Skid killing himself when you sing. I'm going to get creative with it, Skid. himself When you sing I'm gonna I'm gonna get creative With it Skid I just wanna say

He's broken you all Like horses Speaking of Breaking you like horses What did you say Like when you It's a weird visual In my head

Yeah You're training them Oh I know Yeah Sing She has stabling lore This episode is off the rails I do

I do have stabling lore that nerd pf2e joke if you're keeping up the bees that you killed last week had confectionary lore that's amazing that's how they came up with all those epithets

confectionary lore plus six if you were a baker you would have that lore That's amazing That's how they came up With all those Epithets Sometimes I wonder If there's Confectionary lore Plus six Sometimes I just wonder If there's a writer Like if you were a baker You would have that lore Or something

I just wonder if there's I just picture a writer Sitting at their computer Working for Paizo And just being like Thinking of weird lores To add to the list There are so many

It's a bee That eats sugar. Infectionary. Could have been honey lore. No. No, no. That was already taken. Infectionary lore. You guys, last week, you, after finishing the battle with

the oak stewards and those crazy fake creatures, you were in this ransacked room. Took a peek upstairs. Seemed quiet, perhaps a little too quiet. You all go up there and look around and see that you're in this place that's all open to the air.

You see the other two huts, two bridges leading to them. And then you're like, let's go back down. We need to rest. We need to recoup because we don't know what else is in here. So you rest. You barricade the doors. You put sort of traps on the stairs, home alone style,

um, Christmas movie, um, to make sure that if anyone were to come downstairs, you would hear them coming. And then you get a good night's sleep as best as you can. You decide to go across the bridge to North. You cross that bridge,

you open the door and you see these two be like very creatures that are just like, ah, eating cake and cupcakes. There's food all over the map, too. There's food all over the map. There's a rolling pin. It's like a Where's Waldo. There's like a little cast iron pan. Yeah. Yeah, the foundry maps for the premium Gatewalkers package are pretty fantastic.

Was there two versions of the map, One with the intact stove and one with the exploded stove? Or did it have the exact same excellent question? Yeah, did it explode? Yeah, no. Unfortunately, they decided to go with the exploding version here, which kind of gives it away. Kind of gave it away.

I couldn't see it. I wasn't in the room. You know what? I just want to say, I don't think I should have been so hurt because on the map, it looked like the stove already exploded. Here's how they do traps on Foundry. You'll see if I make it visible. There's the trap. Oh, look at that.

Wait, do it again. Oh, I do see it. Do you see it up in the corner there? It just looks like a bear trap. So all the traps do that. And then I double click it. Lucky you got to move around to the other side of the room. Oh, I have to go look.

Tells me all the information. Oh, it was revealed to me because I wasn't in position before. Oh, that is really cool. And now it's gone. Oh! That's a fun little reminder of where the traps are. I love all these little things. Little things.

Well, speaking of little things, Matthew, no. You open the door and you see another room here. It looks like the stores for the kitchen, similarly ransacked as the kitchen and as the workshop that you were in. Everything here is destroyed. You know, this used to be a wonderful, beautiful gnome commune. And now it's been taken over by not only Bolan and these rebel oak stewards, but these malicious fae. on and these rebel oak stewards but these uh malicious fey there was a basket about five feet wide with ropes leading up through a hole in the ceiling and then another door to the south which you already know from walking around outside uh leads to yet another rope bridge

and the final building on this level of the commune. What do you guys want to do? We search. We love to search both rooms just before we go up or down. Deep perceptions, really taking our time. Do some perceptions. 19 for Talitha. Dirty 20 for Brother Ramius of Latria.

We're lucky. We have 18, 19, 20, 21. Oh my god. Skid. Can you do the 22 or 17? 12 is close to 22. That's a large straight. According to Sydney math.

We've never had a Yahtzee. That's the hardest one to get. Oh god. Alright, so that is all. Those are all good rules, except for skits. I'm meditating. You're meditating. He's taking some time.

He's not really paying attention to what you're doing. You're thoroughly searching both rooms. The kitchen is nothing. It's all broken foodstuffs. However, the storage room, it looks like it hasn't been searched as well as the search that you're giving to it. And you find a couple things. You find three minor healing potions. Oh, I need that.

Oh, I need that. You find five tinder twigs. Yes. Oh, yes. And a magical bottle full of a magical liquid. And one of the things we're going to do on this show Just to kind of keep things moving If it's like a simple magical thing

I'm not going to have you waste time rolling checks on it Identify magic Yeah, I'm not going to bother with that Let's keep things going It is a bottle of nectar of purification Oh That doesn't sound simple Yeah, it's evil-ish

It's not like a plus 20 vorpal, John Was that it? Oh, it does pur-ish. It's not like a plus 20 Vorpal John. Uh, was that it? Oh, it does purify food and drink. Oh, nice. Okay, Lucky asks, would you all mind if I just popped one of these healing potions? Go ahead. No, by all means, I'm sorry I couldn't be more help.

No, no, no. This should do the trick. Hup! Hup, hup, hup, hup, hup. Is that 1D? Uh, what is it? Minor minor healing you said yeah yeah three potions well now two potions of minor healing yeah i think i'd probably take the other one i'd like to be up in front with lucky going forward can i take one yeah in case is zephyr do you think

zephyr is going to get to the point where her skill with the bow will outpace her skill with her fists? Or are they going to scale at the same rate? I don't know. I think it depends on my long-wielding. Like, if I get a better bow at some point. But, I mean, maybe my fists will always be better because then I'll eventually also get better hand wraps. Yeah, that's true. Well, I'm sure that there's also class feats you're going to select along the way.

Yeah. Like if there's any. I have a plan. Okay. Okay. Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face. Until they get punched in the mouth. Until they get punched in the face.

But Zephyr is used to that. That's true. I healed five points. It's 1d8 per. Could I take another one? Wow. I mean, I don't have to. Do you want to take it and use it?

I have 14 out of 20. I mean, I don't have to. You want to take it and use it? I have 14 out of 20. I can hold off, but then I'd be using it in battle and wasting an action. Why don't you hold it until we get to the restaurant? Alright. I think I could do that. Does anybody else want to hold on to one? Who's going to need it? What do we think? You can drink it if you want to drink it.

We have two more. Does anybody else want one? Yeah, you were taking one, weren't you? Oh, you took one? I took one because I figured I'd be... Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you take one and I'm gonna drink the second one. Fucking two. Do you need the last one? So it's just 1d8. That's the minor. Per minor

healing potion. Alright, but I'm back to 16. That's better than 9. I'm fine. Two potions. Gone. Brutal. Why are you looking at me like that? I need to have some... Not worth a drop? No. Not yet. What's this? Tinder Twix. Two wasted potions. You can start fire. Yeah, they help start a fire. So Brother

Ramius is like, I'll take care of these. And he takes care of Tinder Twix. He just tosses them away. Oh, can Lucky inspect this basket I asked last time? Is the basket a pulley system? Yes, it is indeed. Do you have like engineering

lore or maybe even thievery to try and figure out? Yeah. Those are two very different skills. Yeah, that's interesting that you asked for either of those. I have thievery. I do have thievery. Oh, good. I have thievery in legal lore. Does this help me? You know, let's just have thievery. I do have thievery. Oh, good. I have thievery in legal lore. Does this help me?

You know, let's just try thievery for this. Okay. Your Honor, this is a simple pulley system. Let the jury see. That's going to be a 21. Okay, yeah. It's a simple pulley system, and you look at it to figure out, like,

oh, okay, probably two of you could fit in there. Pull yourself. Pull yourself up to the top. You see how it works. It looks a little complex. There's like markings on the floor like discoloration of two

circles and you think, oh, there used to be a ladder here perhaps and now it's been replaced by this. Did the gnomes do that? Did the new residents do that? You can't quite tell, but you think two of you could fit in there and you know and you could show everybody how to pull yourselves up you could also just climb the

rope too so i'm just trying to get the timeline straight here so this was this was just a gnome village yeah the gnomes made a deal like all these different groups of gnomes made a deal with the oak stewards i believe to be able to come in and the good oak stewards yeah the good oak stewards, I believe, to be able to come in. The good oak stewards. Yeah, the good oak stewards, to have sections of the forest that they could build on, and this one has been cleared out by Bolan. Okay. Tolitha, Ramius, what do you think? I mean, me and Zephyr could go up, but we have no idea what's up there.

Go. Take a look. There's also the door. We could keep exploring down here but I don't know if we'll make a back around into this room. Let's go up. I like it. Alright. Okay. Ziff? We'll both

get in the basket, I guess. Go ahead. Pull ourselves up. We'll wait down here. Let us know what you see. We'll be up shortly after. I'll yell out the safe word again from the top, which was pineapple. If you hear that

coming down, you know you're in trouble. Buggles, you'll know it. I'll remember. You look over at Talitha's just like eating a scone. See? Awesome. You seem busy. Awesome. A-tisket, a-tet, you two go up the basket. Let's go to a new map.

Carefully and slowly and stealthily up the basket. And quietly. Now, I think that only the two of you should see this small room. Let me explain to you what you see. As you're going up the basket, you hear like, and you go into this room, and it's like there's a water tower in here. There's droplets of condensation beating along the exterior of a large catchment vessel in the center of the room,

and occasionally that water drips onto the floor. The vessel is shaped like a funnel so that the top of it sort of balloons outward to encompass the entire ceiling and connects to a much larger catchment on top of the building. There are pipes covered in gauges and spigots snaking out from the tank in all directions. They run along the floor and the walls. And it's just like piping and blowing out steam. And you figure that this is what's powering the windmill.

What's a catchment? I think it's like a... Like peppermint? No, a catchment is like a... I think it's more like a... A peppermint? No, catchment is like a... I think it's more like a... A basin, right? Like a winter green mint. Spearmint.

Spearmint. Catchment. The action of collecting water, especially the collection of rainfall over a natural drainage area. Gutter. Gutter. Okay, but there's a floor.

Yeah, so you're in the basket, but you could step into the room onto the floor. Yeah, I mean, I think I'll call down. Doesn't seem to be anything up here. Give us a sec. I search for traps as I step around. Yeah, I'd like to do a perception after the stove. I search for traps by stumbling around. I touch everything.

All right, put your dice down there. Are you guys trained in perception? Um, yes, I am. Yes, I am too. Okay, what, uh... I'm an expert. What is your perception? Plus five. You don't roll that. I don't roll? No, you don't roll. Oh, nice. Plus five, and what about you? I'm just trained.

So, plus three. Plus three. Yeah, it does not, you don't see any hazards whatsoever. I don't like that. I don't like that. Yeah, it does not, you don't see any hazards whatsoever. I don't like that. I don't like that. Well, that's what he said, so that's what my character thinks. So I guess just a once over of this room, I'm not sure we need to do anything in here, but I guess. Yeah, I was just going to do a perception unless you want to roll that as well. No, I mean, you're just going to walk around the room and look and see what's what?

Yeah. Okay. The minute the both of you get out of the basket to step onto the floor... An oven explodes. An oven explodes. God damn it. Another god damn exploding oven? If only

it was an oven. The pipes. No. The, uh, basically seals on the water pipes that are running all along the floor. It's like crisscrossing everywhere. You both step on these, and they just, like, blow, and these water jets start flying

randomly around the room, the type that could cut through flesh. Oh my god! That type? So let's roll for initiative. What? Oh my god! Oh, you looked for traps! Roll for initiative! And you failed at looking for those traps, unfortunately. What? Oh, my God. Oh, you looked for traps. Roll, make a roll, make a roll for initiative.

And you failed at looking for those traps, unfortunately. But this is going to be interesting. Before we get to initiative, one of you triggered this trap. It was me, wasn't it? We'll say, one, two, three, Sydney, four, five, six, Kate. Of course, it was Sydney. Before the encounter begins, a water jet comes flying out at you and misses. Just slices right past your head.

Now, let's get into Anish. What did you roll? I'll put Talitha, Brother Ramius, and Buggles in there as well, just in case they can help at all. What did you roll, Lucky? I rolled a 14. 14? Okay. And Zepha?

18. 18 for Zeph Meister. And then Talitha? 8. 8? Oh! Yeah, you're downstairs. I rolled a natural 2. Stank! Brother Ramius? 14. What was that noise up there? Was that skin being cut by water?

Buggles? 16. 16 for Buggles. Okay. Let's get into it. It is the Reservoir Trap's turn. Oh, it's called a Reservoir. Reservoir Trap. Okay, so it is going to start randomly firing off these water blasts.

The first one, same thing. These are random. So, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. This one's against Sydney as well. That's a 21 to hit. Jesus. Yeah. You take 10 points of piercing damage. Oh, no. Oh, I'm gonna go. I am gonna go down really fast. The second one goes against Kate.

And it is a Ooh, this could be a crit. A 27. be a crit A 27 Not a crit Thank god Still going to be 10 points of piercing damage And then third one goes against You with a 1

And this is going to be Probably a miss, a 16 Randomly these water jets Are just flying from pipes all along the walls, the floors, and when it hit both of you, it literally left blood. Blood is gushing out of your arm. It took Lucky more than half her hit points. Water!

I feel like it just scraped her arm a little bit. It is now Zephyr's turn. Yell the word. It's not good. Don't come up here. I was emotionally just water almost critted me.

Crazy up here. I was originally going to be like, I'm going to try to shut this off, but like, yeah, the jet of water almost critted me. Yeah, I mean, I I'm going to leave on my turn. I'm going to try to jump back in the bucket. Jump back in the basket?

Yeah. Okay, jump into the basket and leave Lucky up there to just slide down the road. No, I'm not going to leave her up here, but I'm getting ready to go down. You sure you want to risk getting hit by that water? I duck under the basket. Okay, so you get in there and you... And I'm like, get in here, Lucky! Okay.

We're going back down. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, well, it's Buggle's turn, technically. Is there anything you'd like to do? You hear the screaming. I haven't heard the code word, which is... Sandwiches! Sandwiches.

Pineapple! Pineapple! Pineapple, I haven't heard it yet, so... Okay. Pineapple! I'm gonna delay. Brother Ramius, I assume't heard it yet, so... Pineapple! I'm going to delay. Brother Ramius, I assume you were ready to step into the basket next. Well, the basket's up there. Yeah.

What's going on? Come back down! This is going to delay. Lucky, I get into the basket. You get into the basket? Are you sure you want to get into the basket? Help me! All right, so you get into the basket,

and let me just make sure there isn't a check for you to pull yourself down. Oh, I'm waiting for Zephyr to get. Oh, I'm in the back. She used all three of her actions to get in there and get ready. Well, she wasn't in on the map. I wanted to make sure before I. Yes, luckily you were the one that rolled the engineering check so you can get down with ease.

You get down to the bottom, and again, it's just. What did you do up there? And then it stops. Oh. He falls out of the basket. God dang. There's a trap up there. We thought that

there wasn't a trap and we checked, but there definitely is. The steam thing that's powering the windmill, there's pipes all over the place. And I guess we stepped on one and they just all went off. It's like a bullet, but it's water. It hit me, I think, in my kidney. Oh, no. Can you take a look, Brother Amos? Let me take a look.

Are you... Ease down. I'm bleeding. Would anyone like to... Stay still. I don't know why it hurts so much. I said stay still! Almost a crit.

But he does successfully do seven points of healing. Oh, thank you. Something over a period of ten minutes. If the area is trapped, perhaps there. Something over the period of ten minutes. If the area's trapped, perhaps there's some sort of valuable mechanism up there. No, I wouldn't call it a trap, Talitha. I believe they just broke a pipe.

They said trap. Well, it seems to be over. It felt like a trap. I know, because they left. I think they might... It seems like it's protecting up there. Is that the sense you got? Well, didn't you say you stepped on a pipe and broke it? No. We didn't get really that far into the room.

Yeah, what actually happened? What happened is we stepped on the floor and it went off. There's lots of pipes all around and we just stepped on them. What kind of knowledge do you have? What are your knowledges? You guys got a good look at it. So let's start with Zephyr and Lucky.

Stabling. Legal. Legal and stabling. Levery. Nature. Society. Self. Intimidation. Acrobatics. And anyone have any engineering whatsoever? An engineering background? Yeah.

It seems strange, like it would be a purposeful trap. It just feels like that perhaps it was being used incorrectly. It definitely is what's powering the windmill. And maybe the gnomes knew how to use it, but whoever's recently been doing it has overtaxed it to the point where it's out of control. So maybe it's just bad. Don't windmills usually power other things?

Perhaps. So the windmill is powering something else. Why would you need a powered windmill? Well, maybe the windmill is powering this. The wind powers the windmill, usually. Yeah, and then maybe the windmill is powering some hydraulics. Yeah, some hydraulic system maybe Pumping the water? Eating the water?

Could be I don't know Was it superheated? Or was it just the force of the water that cut them? There was no burning Oh, the water wasn't hot Uh, no Oh, it just looked like steam

Okay, so it was just really hard water I think she's making fun of your trap I'm gonna use that Oh, it just looked like steam. Okay, so it was just really hard water. I think she's making fun of your trap. I'm going to use that healing potion I just got. I didn't add this trap to the adventure. Don't they have for cutting diamonds and stuff? It's water. It's like the water laser. Yeah, they have industrial water cutters.

Yeah, those are insane. Yeah, yeah. Isn't that for friction, though? No, no. Not when you use the water to have the blade. It seems... I'm pretty sure they're like... I know how to cut knives. Water, laser.

Talitha is going to go investigate this door to the south. I'm taking my healing potion that I have. Brother Amias is going to talk to Lucky and just do you know of any way to fix it? Could you disable it or something like that?

I don't know. When I checked it, I didn't see any part that was like a valve, a turn-off valve or anything. It just seems like a mess of pipes. It's a mess up there. I mean, if you want, you can go look. Just don't step out of the basket. I'd like to take a look.

Who has thievery? I do. We both do. Send him back up. Send him back up. Send him back up. I think you didn't take a closer look. Send him back up. Get back in the box. I'll explore the space.

I'll go back up, but I'm not stepping on that floor. I'll go up with you. Do you think you would disable it from the basket? Let's go up. And we will get in and go up. I wouldn't step out the basket again. Squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak. So, Troy, we'll go back up. Who's go up i got we will get in and go up i wouldn't step out the basket again so troy we'll go back up who's going up brother ramius and lucky brother ramius and lucky you go up and uh well can i see it yeah i gotta put you may i see I see it, sir? Let me see it, let me see it. Sure.

You're like a really great goblin. All right, he'll look over this. From the basket. If Zephyr dies. From the basket. Not later. He'll look in the area. He's gonna do a perception roll. If you wanna do it blind, you can.

He's going to do a perception roll on the situation and see if it's just where they happen to stand, if there are places you could step without setting off these things or if it's just a timed sort of thing you know what's your uh perception you trained expert master trained okay plus seven yeah i mean there are spaces between the pipes that you could stand uh stand on like to maneuver about the room take some careful footing but it's possible if it is triggered by stepping on the pipes, then you could walk around. But just a general perception on the room, you look and it's like

it is weird. Like, why is this connected to the windmill at all? But then you think about like, as a well-read weirdo, that gnomes are notorious tinkerers. And so maybe they were like, oh, let me see if I can take this water tower

and turn it into a windmill gravity bong or something like, and maybe it went awry. Like, it's not crazy to think that, like, a gnome would have, that gnomes, especially, They've been tinkering with this. Yeah, just trying to do something else with it.

That's classic gnome behavior. Now, if they're the ones that caused this problem or if it was being overtaxed by the news residents, that's unclear. But it does seem like the tank isn't making the same noise it was when you came up the first time. So maybe the... Maybe the pressure was relieved. Yeah.

The pressure was relieved. Can I just do a thievery check on top of that to see if there's any like turn off valves or like a way that you could not get hit by water. That's a one. Man, crushing it lately. Wow. Wow. You think the only way to really find out is to start walking around.

Brother Ramius, if you want to take a step out there, I would commend you. It seems to me as if it's already run its course. He's looking around. You think so? I think I see a few places I could step. I'd like to try. And he's just going to take a step on one of these places between the pipes that seem safe.

Okay. So you gingerly step out of the basket on the floor, straddling a pipe, and nothing happens. And he'll take another step toward the northeast. Take another step to the northeast. He's looking around this room in the parts where he wasn't able to see because of the, on the other side of the tree trunk. Yeah, revealing a little bit more of the room. You notice now, and nothing happens when you take that step, but you see that there is a window to the west

that has like a rope, a single rope extending up to another hut. rope extending um up to another hut um it's like uh elevated higher than this level it's not like a third level it's just the hut up there is higher than this one um like a split level yeah like kind of like a split level ranch a ranch tree house going down into this uh window just a rope yeah rope connecting the two windows. Zipline. Can I move to that window? Yeah, for sure. Lucky, look, here, there's a window and perhaps a connection to another hut.

All right, I'm going to step on the ground. Yes, right there. Right there. Okay. Carefully. Okay. Imagine you're a cat and step gracefully lethal it's not helpful and not funny

and you can I'm sorry I can't I just can't see it on the map am I anywhere near where this window is oh it's oh it's down I see it's right by the basket yeah southwest got it oh cool amazing see out the window

um okay so it's like a tightrope, like a zipline Yeah, a zipline And the one that it connects to is higher than where we are So you could technically climb the line It'd be tricky, and it's a pretty decent drop Yeah, and Ramius is not an athlete by any stretch So he looks across and he's like You could probably easily get

across that, couldn't you? Is the other window open? Can I see? Um, yeah. There's like a, um, curtain on it. I don't know if I should go in there without everybody else. No, of course not. I'm just saying, keep it in mind. If we find ourselves on the other side,

it might be an interesting way to move between huts. Also a good escape if next door goes awry. Or it might be fun. Or it might be fun. Or it might just be fun. All right, you're like downstairs yelling, or it could be fun. Or it could be fun. All right.

Did someone say zip line? I think we should go back down, head over toward that building, and see what there is to see upstairs. Sounds good. Lead the way. And we'll get back in the... Well, I do want to, if I can find a safe, what I feel is safe passage, I want to go all the way around to the other side of the trunk. You're walking gingerly around, and yeah, if you do that, you take one more step there.

Yeah, look at that! And you see a door. There's a door! To the south, which you know, from being outside, will lead to the rope bridge that takes you to the area where that staircase led up. The original hut that we were in. Look, Lucky, I think I know where this goes. Door's closed now. He's going to open the door.

There you go. Alright. It's all coming together. How fucking cool is this? This is an awesome level. Awesome level design. Really cool. Yeah, this bridge, this way. Should we go this way? No, because that leads back to where we started. We should stay

here, go back down, then enter through the southern door that we haven't opened yet. You're right. You're right. Of course. Back in the bucket. And then chomp, chomp, chomp. Back in the bucket. Down. Chomp, chomp, chomp. Nice.

Yes. All right, a little re-con. Yeah, a little re-connoissance. All right, so you've got one more door that you have not opened yet. And Talitha was, yeah, Talitha's on it. Talitha will open the door. You open the door, and you see another small rope bridge leading to another building, another hut, and there's no door there. It's just an opening leading in.

Oh, okay. Perception check into the room. Hear anything? See anything? Any movement? Anything at all? 18. No.

This is a huge building. Yeah. From what I can see, it looks like benches at a long table. Maybe like some sort of mess hall or dining hall. Mess hall or a chapel. But this is like, from looking at the map, it's like twice as big as the two other spaces we've been in so far combined. Combined, yeah. It looks massive. Well, this looks like this would be when we first came up and met those oak stewards that we fooled.

Yeah. This was the western wing. That they told us not to go to. That they told us not to go to. Oh, right. But here we are. Troy, on the map, this rope bridge seems to have been damaged or repaired. Is that just fun drawing, or do I observe that it's unstable?

Yeah, like the branch, it looks that, do I observe? That it's, like, unstable. Yeah, like the branch, it looks like, is broken through it or something? Yeah, I mean, the branches are all sort of growing through. You saw that on the floor on the other side last week. The branches are growing through onto the floor. So it didn't fall through. Yeah, it doesn't. It was designed to build around the existing branch. Yeah, I mean, they're all kind of, they all feel a little shaky, but

you look okay. Alright. Lucky. I'll follow you. I'll take the lead. And she heads forward past Talitha and gracefully, carefully, walks across

this bridge towards the building. When she, uh, Zephyr, what are you doing? Are you bowing it up in the back or are you moving up forward and doing, I don't know.

Cause I'm still down a little bit. Uh, the healing potion only gave me four hit points. Oh, I can, I'll treat wounds on you. Oh yeah. Um,

yeah. Or attempt to anyway. Oh man. Got, gotcha. That attempt to, anyway. Oh, man. Gotcha. That's two, one point away from crits. Minimum. Minimum. Which is?

Two. Oh, sick. Well, I'm down a little less now. But, yeah, I was planning on, from now on, just kind of not using my bow alongside Lucky, but this room looks bigger. Okay.

Yeah, the range might be... So you're staying behind. Yeah, there's room for you to kind of do your thing. Yeah, I'm going to have my bow out. Okay. So yeah, Lucky is running up and then doing the thing like in an action movie where she gets around like a doorway. And she like tucks, you know, like around and looks to see if there's anything there.

If she had a gun, she would hold it. You probably see something in the room there as you come on. Oh boy. Let me explain the room first. I don't see it. I don't see anything. I don't see it. I'm only lucky.

All I hear is Matthew go, oh boy. On the western wall, it appears that Tinkerbell has joined the fray. Oh no, don't tell me that. Let's talk about the room first. It's a dining hall of sorts, maybe a gathering hall. There is a long wooden table like what Talitha saw. It's lined with benches. You see assorted musical instruments lining the walls.

The lute, electric guitar, stand-up bass. One could imagine... The orbo. The orbo. The orbo. One could imagine that the gnomes probably use this room to sing and dance and do weird gnome shit.

This is the venue? This is the venue. This is the venue. This is where they jam. But obviously the gnomes have been... It's a nice venue. The acoustic is amazing. It's built really well.

The gnomes have obviously been displaced, and there's a noticeable lack of joy in the room as you enter. There are two doors leading south, one on the west side and one on the east side, kind of at an angle on the southern wall. There is a little fairy creature kind of floating in the air over near the western wall. And you come in. She goes, oh, hello.

You startled me. What are you doing here? And Lucky says, we're reporting to Bolon. Oh, Bolon. Oh, he is the one that has taken this place from us. A terrible man he is. Are you, is it just the two of you? Yes, it's just the two of us and we're here.

This is going really well. Go on. Made all the right choices. That's what I keep doing. So I keep cooking. Before this conversation goes any further, can I roll a perception on her reaction to Bolan to see if she's being genuine about...

Sure, I'll roll it in secret. I am also doing the same. Before I say that, before I say, here's the two of us, I am trying to get a read, a read on her. Plus six for, plus five.

Before I open, but I'm an expert. With a blatant lie that is disprovable in one second. Two lies. If she moves, if she takes a step

to her right, it will be disprovable. Literally. You didn't, you certainly didn't get anything of her reacting to the name Bolon. Forgive me, are you one of the original inhabitants? Oh, original is an interesting way of putting it. I am an original inhabitant of the forest, as are all we sprites.

What is your name, traveler? Come, sit on these benches. They are sturdy. What the? Perception on the bench is for traps. And this is what she looks like. Oh. Hello, please come.

She's cool. Is she tiny? Yeah. She's tiny. Oh. Is she mechanically tiny? Yes. Mechan's tiny. Oh. Is she mechanically tiny? Yeah. Is she just mechanically tiny? Mechanically tiny. Come. You are very kind to offer us...

Cheese? Cheese. Is that what you're serving? Cheese. Yes. Yes, we love cheese. However, we're a bit pressed for time. I understand.

We're in search of Bolan. I'm going to step into the room. Oh, another traveler. And what is your name, good sir? I am Brother Ramius. What is your name? My name is Chibi. Jimmy.

Chibi. Chibi. Chibi. My father was Chibi. I'm Chibi. Chibi. Chibi. Chibi.

Chibi. Chibi. Chibi the Sprite. Chibi the Sprite. Mrs. Sprite. Oh, just Miss. the Sprite. Chibi the Sprite. Mrs. Sprite. Oh, just Miss. Miss Sprite. Oh, sorry.

Long story. Sorry about that. Sorry to hear about that. Chibi. Is there a Mr. Chibi? Is there a Mr. Chibi that I could speak to? Chibi, I'll be straight with you. All right.

Shucks. We're looking for Bolon. We're looking for Bolon. What the fuck? We're looking for Bolon because we believe that his forces of these oak steward deserters are ruining the forest. And we think that he, well, we think he should be destroyed. The forest is my home! Of course, and you wouldn't want it destroyed

by the likes of Bolon. No, absolutely not! I think... Are there more of you over there? I think that you and I have similar interests. Hmm. As do my friends here. I see.

Have you seen Bolan lately? Recently? Well, it's interesting you mention that. Here, let me come a little closer. Bolan, Bolan, yes, yes, I have seen him recently. I have seen him and you'll see him. Talitha will flank out. As she gets closer, I flank out along the northern wall.

Inhale! Oh, no! Come on! Really? Can you just make anyone nice? Can we talk to anyone? Can anyone be nice? When she saw more people p piling in the back.

I had high hopes. I was trying to lie and said we only had two so she wouldn't be freaked out. Then you guys were like, no, we have more. I have a high deception. Let me lie.

Joe was like, wait, what? Is there something in there? Joe literally went, I'm going to come into the room after Sidney said two people. He heard me say it. Dude, it is an open door.

Talitha is right next to me and she starts talking with somebody that I can't see. Like, I'm not staying back there. Just a reminder, this initiative is brought to you by Norse Foundry. Norse Foundry, for all your random number generating needs. Norse Foundry. Norse Foundry.

Other big shout out to our sponsors, Demiplane and Foundry VTT. They've been making everything so much easier for both the players and the GM. Hell yeah. Let's get into it. Buggles, what'd you roll? 22.

22. Yeah. Lucky. Dirty 20. For a total. Oh, 20. Oh, yeah, yeah. That's what that would be.

Dirty total. Go on. Dirty. Talitha. 25. 25 for Tal, yeah. That's what that would be. Dirty total. Go on. Dirty. Talitha. 25. 25 for Talitha. Zephyr. 15. 15 for Zephyr.

Brother Ramius. Nine. Nine for Brother Ramius. All right. Well, it is Chibi's turn. So Chibi is going to unleash. Good thing Talitha slid out of the way there, because Brother Ramius... Well, let's see what this cone is going to look like.

Oh, boy. Oh, my God. Love a good cone. All right, 15-foot cone. Let's really get into Foundry here. Let's get my cones on. Don't say that. I wish you wouldn't.

Find another way to say that. I can't. For the sake of Found't. For the sake of the sponsorship. For the sake of the sponsorship. Got a beautiful cone template here for a 15-foot cone of a little spell known as Color Spray. Oh, come on. I'm sure if you're familiar with

Color Spray, Lucky and Brother Ramius give me a Will Save. I don't think I've encountered this in 2nd Edition. Oh, boy. Okay. Chibi! Will save. Come on, brother.

No! Oh, no. Two looks of sadness. Oh, no. What'd you get? I got a 14. 14. And Lucky?

I got a five. Oh, no. Failure and critical failure. I rolled a nine. 14. And Lucky? I got a 5. Oh, no! Failure and critical failure. I rolled a 9, too. Brother Ramius is stunned 1, blinded for 1 round, and dazzled for 1 minute. Oh my god. Dazzled is fine. It doesn't mean anything. Lucky is stunned for 1

round and blinded for 1 minute. Wait, stunned 1 or stunned for one round and blinded for one minute. Wait, stunned one or stunned for one round? Stunned for one round. I think it's your stunned one. So you lose an entire round. Yeah, stunned. Oh, that's what it is. You're not stunned one. It's a big difference. You're stunned for a round and then blinded

for one minute. So you're blinded. Absolutely brutal. For the combat, you are stunned one, blinded a round and dazzled for a minute. So just make sure you add those conditions to your jawn. Wow, that worked out really well. That's the best use of color spray I've ever had in my life. And then she's going to go ahead and, like, fire.

You see this, like, an orange glow about her that starts to swell, and she just fires something in the direction of Talitha, a little spark over towards you, natural 20. Oh, my God. Rocks! Rocks for sale! Get your rocks! Named character as well.

Thank you to Norse Foundry. Eric from Norse Foundry I don't like Chitty Beautiful Red Sox dice What is this? Is this a ranged mundane attack Or is it a magic attack? It's a ranged

It's not I wouldn't call it mundane I wouldn't call it mundane That's subjective Okay In that case We will go to Ulias

I'm going to enact Just for Oh no I haven't enacted yet I can't use a reaction You're a good man Charlie Brown We'll go to U haven't enacted yet. I can't use a reaction. You're a good man, Charlie Brown. We'll go to Alias. That's not true.

I can use a reaction? It's up to Troy. Damn it. I'm just going to do Eerie Flicker, which gives a flat... It's a DC5 flat check to see if I phase onto the ethereal planet. I'm not going to allow it this time.

In this case. As written, you're not supposed to do it, but you can kind of fudge it. What do you mean you're not supposed to do what? You're not supposed to get reactions beforehand as written. I don't necessarily agree with that, but you can interpret it that way. Basically, I think the way they do it is if you're clearly surprised

by the event, you know, but if you saw it coming, you don't have to. You can get your reactions ahead of you. Ulias from Seattle, Washington. Eating away at your confidence, your shot misses wildly, making you...

It's not a fumble, right? It's a goddamn crit. Bitch! Ulias! You spelled your name wrong, too! You spelled your name wrong! It's not a real name! We'll come back to you. Ulias! Elias! You spelled your name wrong, too. You spelled your name wrong. That's not a real name. We'll come back to you. We'll come back to you.

Elias. This one is from Arrow in the Knee in Seattle. I Arrow in the Knee. I Arrow in the Knee. It's called Arrow in the Knee. Your shot hits your target and it bends itself in their knee. Normal damage. And the target is slowed one for 1d4

rounds. The creature also takes 1d4 persistent bleed for 1d4 rounds. So normal damage, but persistent bleed and slowed one. Alright, so this is brutal. Oh, that's going to kill your device strategy. Alright, well here's the good news.

There's only one point of fire damage. So basically this spark comes out, hits you in the knee, burns your pant leg, and it cuts through that you start squirting blood from your knee. That's how we're going to interpret this. 1d4 bleed, you said? 1d4 persistent bleed for 1d4 rounds. So it will end on its own, as this one is written. Okay.

All right, so I'll add that. If you don't end it before. And it's 1d4, you said? Yeah. Okay, I'll just add that to your Jonski. You won't take that damage now, so you only take one point of damage, but you are slowed on top of everything else. Thank you, arrow in the knee.

Thanks, arrow in the knee. And that is her turn. Of course, is she the only enemy in this room? Why would you say that? It's an interesting question, Kate. And we'll find out after this break. It's not a bird. It's not a plane.

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the only enemy in this room because emerging out of perhaps invisibility next to Lucky is a little creature that looks like this. It's her ex-husband. It's her ex-husband!

She lied! Oh! This is like a worm gully right now. It really is. It's like a shrimp man. If a cockroach was a centaur. Like he's half hot

and half gross. Yeah, half hot, half... I have him listed in the initiative as weird flying man crab fairy. I mean, his legs do look kind of crab-like. Like if he were a lobster.

Crabs are roaches of the sea, right? That's true. He is coming out of invisibility, so he will be catching you off guard, or flat-footed, as it were. She's blind. She's already blind. Yeah, you're already blind, so it doesn't matter.

I'm blind! I'm blind! I'm blind! And he's just going to come up and just punch you in the face. Like this little fairy. And probably misses with an 11, although your AC's taking a hit. That does miss. That does miss. He's like, oh, I guess that's not going to work.

Wait. My AC is taking a hit because I'm blinded. Mm-hmm. Let me check. It's not on my sheet, but how much would it be taking a hit for? I don't think it'd be that low. It basically makes you

flat-footed. Okay, let me see if I can modify that. Negative four to perception. Yeah, what's the blinded? No, it does not make you flat-footed. Yeah. Oh, okay.

Well, now you are flat-footed. But all terrain is difficult terrain. Okay, but you said because he surprised me, I am flat-footed. You are flat-footed. So you'll minus two to your AC, and 11 still wouldn't hit, right? Okay. Yeah. Okay.

I think it should make you flat-footed. I'm reading the description. I know. I believe you that that's what the rule is, but I think it should logically make you flat-footed. I think it should make you flat-footed I know, I believe you that that's what the rule is But I think it should logically make you flat-footed I think Well, Skid I'm not going to argue too strenuously about it under these circumstances

I'm just saying I think this should be harder Alright, so seeing that that little punch from his tiny fist didn't work His legs start like scraping together in the back. Oh, he's going to do a little cricket thing. And they're just going... And it starts like this music starts coming

out of him. Really? Everybody roll a will save. This is ridiculous. This is a nightmare. We've not really dealt with a lot of fey on this network, honestly. We've dealt with entirely too many fey. I am so, Matthew, you're going to get this die right in the head. You said will?

Will, yeah. Let's take it around the horn, starting with Buggles. Nine. Nine, okay. Eighteen. Eighteen. Eighteen. I got an eight and I'm looking at my bottle cap.

Oh. And I think I might use it. I would hope you did. Honestly, yeah. I'm using it. Okay, eight. Oh no. That's the worst.

Nine. Okay. It's better than an eight. You could just put that bottle cap a little closer to me. That'd be great. Thanks so much, Steeler. All right, so we got a nine, an 18, a nine. 22.

A 22. And a 13. And a 13. Okay. That would have been a critical fail. Oh, you did the right thing. Huge roll. Instead, it's just a fail.

So we got fail, succeed, fail, succeed. What is yours? 13. 13, fail. Oh, you did the right thing. Huge roll. Instead, it's just a fail. So we got fail, succeed, fail, succeed. What is yours? 13. 13, fail. All right, so those of you who succeeded, no effect. Those of you who failed, you are flat-footed and take a 10-foot status penalty to your speed as you just can't help but dance to the music. Stop.

There's something catchy about this weird little leg tune that is getting into your mind, and you're just like, so river dancing. Brother Ramius and Blind Lucky are dancing. No, I'm not. I'm not. Oh, you're not. I am.

Zephyr with her bow. Zephyr, very out of character right now, is dancing. Talitha is not sure what to do. I wish that I could see it, but I can't. You can only imagine, Brother Reem. I'm blind. He's such an awkward dancer. All your books.

What's his move? Oh, God. It's a lot of... For the listening audience, you don't want to watch this section. Have you ever seen the episode of Seinfeld where Elaine is trying to dance? Oh, God. I like that. Little kicks.

Little kicks. A lot of thumbs. Lane is trying to dance. Little kicks. Little kicks. A lot of thumbs. I mean, the thing is, it's like you're obviously not like,

oh, what a catchy beat. You're dancing. It's something that's infecting your mind. Yeah, you're river dancing. So I'll let you know how long that goes on. Right now, consider for the rest of your lives. The rest of you who succeeded will no longer have to roll saves against that. He still has one action left

because he's so cool. And he is going to just be like, in the direction of Talitha. And with the multiple attack penalty, this is going to be a miss with a nine. What did he do? Shout at me? Like a weird little dissonant note

came out of his mouth. Mind you, he's like this big and just floating there with his little crab shrimp legs. And now it is Talitha's turn. Talitha is going to devise a strategy. I'm going to attempt to attack the crab crab ferryman. I like that we're calling him a crab. He has way too many legs.

The crooked crab ferryman. I'm a crawfish! Okay, I many legs. The cricket crab ferryman. I'm a crawfish. Okay, I will use that to now attack with my second action. That is going to be a 24 to hit. 24 is a hit. Okay, which gives me my strategic strike with the rapier. That is going to be seven points of damage. Okay.

And that is my turn. And that is my turn. And that is your turn. So weird. Buggles, you're on the bridge. You gotta save us. Dancing away. He's got the minus 10 to the speed now, too. I take it back.

That is... Might be a 26 actually. Is that a crit? Let me just activate here. Oh no, I already put it up. Alright. Before we get to Buggles, two points of bleed and give me a flat check. Right.

10 on the flat check. Brutal. How many rounds? Did you roll the d4 for how many rounds? I didn't. This was from the crit, right? Yeah. Two rounds. Two rounds.

What about the slowed? Was that 1d4 rounds as well? The slowed? Yeah. Wait, who was slowed for? Slowed 1 for 1d4 rounds. And who was slowed? Oh, Lucky is slowed for the 1d4.

And I am too. I'm stunned. I'm sorry. There's a lot of conditions already floating around there. How many rounds am I slowed for? Or are you going to make it? Just got to roll a d4. Is it for slowed? Oh, it said 2. I'm stunned How many rounds am I slowed for? Just gotta roll a d4 Is it for slowed? Or is that for the bleed?

You can just make it the same What was the slowed? Slowed 1 for 1d4 rounds This is part of the Slowed and bleeding So 4 rounds No Alright well 1 down 3 more to go I've never known you to be an optimist Okay, so four rounds. Oh. Oh. Oh, awful.

All right, well, one down. Three more to go. Yeah, one down, three to go. I've never known you to be an optimist. Only one to go on the bleed. Now it's Buggles' turn. Sorry, Buggs. All right, Buggles is just like doing a little jig.

Oh, my God. Crying. I don't like this. And he's going to hop his way into the room. I and he can finally see what's going on. That's right. Oh, boy. It's not looking good. Where is the Tinkerbell-ish lady?

She's right in the middle of the room there. Oh, I see. Okay, then Buggles is going to summon a ball of flame into his little hand and toss it at her. Okay, that is a 24 to hit. 24 is a hit. Okay. All right, that's six, seven points of fire damage.

Okay. And then with my third action, he's going to psychic's going psychic shield. Psychic shield. All right. It is Lucky's turn. I'm stunned. Good turn.

It is now Zephyr's turn. Are we ready for that Lucky drop? I will say that. I've been waiting, like literally every die roll that she's made i can't wait to hear what it is i will say that it's really cool to look at the map though once you added the blinded condition because now everybody is wavy circles and it's all black and white it's very fun yeah check it out at home there this is what lucky sees yeah but i it's cool i i can't see shit it's awesome wow cool i don't want that it's funny you also get like a faint

memory of the room yeah i like i have like want that it's funny you also get like a faint memory of the room yeah i like i have like blind sense sort of like i know there was a table over there so fucking cool all right um all right zephyr what do you got um well i uh shimmy into the room here and i've got 15 feet of movement speed because I'm a little busy dancing. I think I want to move. I'm not. I think I want to move. I don't want to group up with everyone because I've seen them use at least one area of effect

thing. And so that was one action. Zephyr's pissed. How could you be pissed? This sucks. I don't want to dance. This is awful. She can't like bottle

her rage anymore oh so she you just see like her limbs just

like start to um they tense up and they just kind of like break into uh

like you know those maimed wolves that are like have the long limbs or and they just kind of, like, break into, like, you know those maned wolves that are, like, have the long limbs or whatever? Like, it kind of does that. Oh, yeah. So her limbs get longer. Her limbs just get kind of wild. I have, this is her deviant feat, and I don't think she's ever used it. Let's go. I don't think she knows she has it.

I think that she's mad and it's happening. Whoa. You know? So she gets up to this thing. Two actions. Titan swing. Her limbs just like, and she looks at this fairy.

She's like, fuck you. Poor little chibi. And I use two actions to do this and make a melee strike. Melee? Melee. A little melee.

Melee. A melee strike against this fucking fairy. All right, so you come into the room, you do this, and then boom. Boom. Trying to hit this fairy in the face. Oh. Caitlin Stamos. I'm seeing my whole name.

I'm disappointed in you. When I do a bad thing. That's why I did it. Do you want one of mine? I have two. Rolled a natural one. I know. Do you want one of mine? I have two. Rolled a natural one. I know. Do you want one of my...

You can't share it? I take this back, actually. If only you'd used... That's only the start of the bad news. Yeah, critical fumble for a name. You also have to roll for a... Oh, the Deviant John. The flash...

Not flashback. What's it called? The setback? It's called... Do you have to roll it before? Can it interrupt the use of it? It's a flat check. We did this last time. It works, but then you have an issue.

Yeah, so can you just roll that flat check real quick for triggering this? 14. Okay, so you're good. But now if you use it again today, it's a DC 10. Yeah. Flat check, I think. Or 11. it's a DC 10. Yeah. Gotcha, I think. Or 11. Let's start at 10 and it goes up to 1. Alright, but a critical fumble. Alright, critical fumble

from Richard in Sheboygan. Sheboygan? Sheboygan, Wisconsin! In Sheboygan! Whoa! Alright, Richard from Sheboygan. Oh no. Not again. In the infinite improbabilities of the universe,

a pot of petunias appears in the sky above your head. It hits you. What? It's a Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Yes. Oh, no, not again. That's the last thought of the flowers, is it? Yes.

So a pot of petunias appears in your sky. it hits you and deals 2d6 bludgeoning damage no no no who is this adjusted for a level one character exactly like you don't ever put in damage numbers that are not adjusted for level some frankly i'd like to praise this guy that seems good can we change it to 1d6 yeah and then yeah 2d that could not, 2d6. That could... Not bad. Four points of damage. Four points of damage. Terrible craps roll. Yep, not a good craps roll. And then you must roll a fortitude save.

What are you going to do? Throw up? What else could happen? I don't know. It's already ridiculous. 13. That is a fail, and you are dazzled for one round. Dazzled.

I mean, this makes sense. This is the first time. It's, like, kind of happening uncontrollably. Yeah. So she probably doesn't know what's going on and can't use it. It's probably, like, damage to her body just going through this right now. Yeah, the way... Dazzled for one round? Yeah.

Dazzled, yeah. The way I'm going to interpret that is a portal didn't open and this dropped out of the sky. As your limbs were elongating, you bumped into a shelf and a planter fell on top of your head. Kind of like. And that's why you missed. And now you're dazzled. All right. Sorry, Zeph.

Can Brother Ramius right the ship? It's a little hairy here. I doubt it. Brother Ramius is just dancing. Something's happening to me! He can't see anything. He's blind. He's auto-dancing.

I wish I could unsee that. It's a horrible situation. He will. Face me. He will attempt to write himself and remember his training, his focus, his connection with Gruhasta. Prayer will set you free. He's going to focus, even as his legs continue to dance,

he is going to ask for the Keeper's blessing. Keeper, save us. And this magical divine energy begins to form all around him as the Keeper begins to bless all of us. He casts Bless. Oh, nice. And anybody within five feet of me gets a plus one to hit at the moment.

So yeah, then that's two actions and I'm slowed, or stunned one, so that's all he can do. Great, so Buggles and Lucky will get a plus one to hit. Thank you. Wait, I'm too far away. Plus one status bonus to attack rolls while within the emanation.

Yep. Which is just a five-foot burst. Five-foot burst. Five-foot emanation, yes. But it can grow. It's almost like he starts to become a beacon, and the light is starting to, like, reach out. Currently, if you're within five feet, you get this bonus.

You might think if you get closer to Brother Ramius, you'll be invigorated and get this bonus. Status bonus. It is Chibi's turn. Chibi almost fell at the hands of Zephyr. The long hands of Zephyr, but instead Chibi is still alive. Bowfoot, we have them! They are blind! Let's finish them!

And she takes her rapier and goes to stab at Zephyr. This tiny little, like, toothpick just... Ah! Fuck you! That is going to be a 19 to hit. That is exactly... Oh, no. My AC.

You're going to take one point of piercing damage and one point of fire damage. That glow that's coming off her is like going on to the rapier and hitting you. Ow! And then she will take a step

back diagonally and fire off that same spark that she fired at Talitha at you that hit critically and caused her to bleed. Watch out. Watch for your knee. And that is going to be... They go for the knees!

Even with the map, that's a 20 to hit. Oh, my God. Just on fire here, literally, but only one point of fire damage. So the damage wasn't that bad, but she did hit you. The crit's bleed and additional effects have been way worse than the actual damage. So the damage wasn't that bad, but she did hit you. The crit's bleed and additional effects have been way worse than the actual damage. Alright.

If only we weren't rolling so well. This little creature, Bowfoot, evidently, Bowfoot is going to continue to fiddle, which means you do not get a save to try and right yourself if he uses an action to continue fiddling his legs. What does it do besides the reduced movement?

Ten feet. Ten feet movement. Critical failure, you're slow. Just regular failure. What's regular? Regular failure, you're off guard. Oh, okay. So I'm saying off guard.

We updated Foundry VTT, so now it's using the nomenclature from the remaster Pathfinder remastered but it's not doing anything mechanically so you might hear me

use off guard same thing as flat footed so yeah you are off guard both of you who failed from the fiddling

or three of you failed right yeah Buggles so yeah flat footed and a minus 10 and if any of you nobody critically failed to that right so gonna keep doing that keep having you be flat footed and a minus 10 And if any of you nobody critically failed to that

Right so gonna keep doing that Keep having you be flat footed And then he is going to Fire off a Spell I think And normally Lucky would get an attack of opportunity Here but you're blind

Unbelievable Never happened I have a question though Yeah, I'll ask And I was going to ask on my turn I don't think this pertains to the attack of opportunity But I do have the sharp-eared catfolk trait So I have a plus two circumstance bonus To locate undetected creatures

So they would be undetected to me Since I'm blinded, correct? Yes But I would have to do that on my turn Do a seek action Right, to make them on my turn, do a seek action. Right, to make them hidden. I can't do a seek action now and use my attack of opportunity. Right.

Okay. All right, just checking. Yeah, there might be some cool feat that would allow you to do that, but as written, no. All right. All right, so here he's going. I mean, are you sort of, are you saying that it's in writing that you can't take an attack of opportunity if you're blind? Or can I do so with disadvantage? No, I just assumed you said that.'s in writing that you can't take an attack of opportunity if you're blind? Or can I do so with disadvantage?

I don't see that. I was just looking it up. There's nothing about... I might be carrying this over for Chewie. ...reactions in Blinded either. I think she can take it. She just doesn't know where it is. My catfolk is grinning very largely with her big teeth.

As you hear these voices debate the rules of the world around you. Yeah. What's his name? Bofa? Bofa Deez Nuts? And then I take a step. Yeah, what's up? Bofa Deez Nuts.

That's good. You thought I'd let her do it now. And I double-slice. I think this might be a call for the drop. If I'm allowed to do it. If I do it and I hit. And you hit. And I kill him.

You have to do a flat check to hit it. Yeah, so I think it's... DC 11. Wait, but if it's undetected... It's not undetected. She knows it's there. He's hitting her. It's just hidden from her.

Undetected means you have no idea there's a guy in the room. Yeah, I guess they aren't. I know they're there. I'm just blind now. So I would do a flat check. Yeah, so if it's hidden to you. Yeah, if it was undetected, that's totally different. You tell me.

I'm striking that. I roll the flat check and the attack. But if it's just hidden, yeah, I'm not going to do any deep digging here. I'll say you know it's there. Your friends are yelling out to you. So let's roll to hit first and then the flat check so you'll be disappointed if one hits. That's not the right way.

So rude. It's much more fun though. That's a 17. You feel like that might be a hit. Plus nine. Now give me the flat check. I swear to God. 19. Oh! Hell yeah!

All right, so it has no bonuses to its AC. 26 to hit. 26 to hit and 19 beats. All right, so you do get the attack. But I can't do my double slice, correct? Because that's a two action. That's just a one attack. Wait, wait, wait, wait.

Double slice is an action. Attack of opportunity is a reaction. 26? Yeah. 27. Because of the plus one. Oh, because of the plus one. Is that a crit? You son of a bitch. That is a crit. 26? Yeah. 27. Because of the plus one. Oh, because of the plus one. Is that a crit?

You son of a bitch? That is a crit. Yeah! Keep your face up! What was it? Both of these nuts! Both of these nuts! Both of these nuts!

That's what she says. Cringing crits! So that's with my Kopech. Oh, phenomenal. Four plus four, eight points of damage. Okay. Yeah!

Let's do it! Oh, phenomenal. Four plus four, eight points of damage. Okay. We're up all night to get lucky. Yeah! We're up all night to get lucky. Let's do it. Yeah, we're up all night to get lucky. She's not dancing from the fiddle, but she does dance a little bit, and she swings her kopech around. She voluntarily dances.

I got one for Joe's character. He ain't heavy, he's my brother. That was the one I was going to do. I just thought of that. It's really long, but I think it would be worth it. No, I'm just going to ain't heavy, he's my brother. That was the one I was going to do. I just thought of that. It's really long, but I think it'd be worth it. No, I'm just going to do it like, he's my brother. He's my brother. He's my brother.

Or just like the opening music would be great for that. Instantly recognizable. All right, I'm so thrown off from this. I was thinking more intuitively and not what the actual rules are, because in 1E, you couldn't do it. But here, you can. I don't see any reason you can't. We might be told otherwise.

I think it's fine. However, do I lose the spell now? That you're making a stance with? That you were about to cast. I was about to cast a spell. I think it interrupts the action, but do I lose the spell? It does not interrupt. It does not disrupt the action. I think maybe unless it's a crit.

There are some cases where that's the case. But that was a crit. It's not in the attack of opportunity explanation that a crit disrupts the... This is what happens. We start jumping on the boards here to read stuff and you don't want to confuse it with everything else. But it appears that because it was a crit

and this is a spell with somatic components that is considered using the manipulate action, it disrupts and I lose. Yeah! And it only happened because of fucking Bless! Bless! Dude, when you cast Bless, when I want to say, I was like,

what a dumb move by a dummy. And it literally was the game changing. Dude, I looked through my thing and I was like, I'm stunned once. So like, what's two actions that I don't have to see anyone to do? I was really limited. That was the only spell I could cast. I was about to cast Glitter Dust.

Oh my god. Just to make the rest of you blind. Yeah, everybody would have been just like, ah. And look, it's a ten foot burst. So like, that's everybody except Brother Ramius and Zephyr. Yeah. Wow. But instead, the spell is lost.

And you lose the actions. I lose the actions. Yeah! Attack of opportunity, boom. Lose your spells. Get fucked up. Both of these nuts. Talitha, you are up.

Incredible. Okay, I'm going to go after both of these. I'm going to devise a stratagem first, though. And I will not attack. Well, actually, I will. He's had enough, you say. I will attack. I will just use a normal attack.

I will not use the devise a stratagem strategy. I'll just try to blindly hit him. Okay. Look at me like I'm insane. I believe it says the next strike you make must use this d20 roll as its result. I believe so. If you, yeah, okay, yep, you're right. So instead,

do I have the movement? I do, because you moved up with your other guy I did With Chibi Chibi I will strike Chibi That's Miss Chibi to you You are married though, your husband's here

Natural 20 I mean the swings, the crits, it's just out of control right now. It's about time. This rapier is deadly. Oh, my gosh. Amazing. Let's read the critical effect. Let's take it to the niche.

Chris from Montgomery, Alabama. Montgomery, Alabama. Montgomery. What's up, Chris? What a follow through. You line up your swing with a little gusto and your attack carries a bit of extra momentum, giving you a couple of extra steps more than you usually would. Double damage and you gain two extra actions this turn.

Wow. All right, so I don't double the deadly die, right? No, you do not double the deadly die. Greedy son of a bitch. That'll be 23 points of damage. Yeah, you followed through. Holy. What kind of weapon do you have, a rapier?

Just skewer her. Yes. Nice. What a follow through. I thought we were toast. That's why I used up a spell. That was not looking good. You got the chance here to do a double kill now

because you've got two extra actions. Your map is going to keep getting worse. My map is the issue. Why not? Why not indeed? Might as well. I'm going to stab at a... But then if I go back after both of these nuts...

I love how that's his name now. Okay, I have to use my Devise a Stratagem roll, which was a seven. When you fail, what does that mean? I didn't fail. I just rolled badly, so I decided I won't use that. I'm not going to attack that person. I'll miss. You could do something else.

You could aid. I could do something else, yeah. I'm going to aid. Let's see. Zephyr. I'm going to aid Zephyr I'm gonna aid Zephyr okay so be Buggles Buggles brother Ramius and then Zephyr Buggles lucky Zephyr brother Ramius oh lucky

lucky you could jump oh I'll I'll aid lucky yeah I'm gonna need the help I'm gonna swing yeah so I will attempt I will basically I'll all the way I'll try to story wise narrate it is I'll use my poor divisive strategy roll to make a bad attack to distract both of these nuts

so they shouldn't make anything. All right, so the DC's high, but get in and roll it. Natural six. Okay. Over here! Who? But maybe you won't even need Lucky,

because it's Buggle's turn, unless you have an action left. I do have an action left. Yeah, you do. What could I possibly do? Oh, I know what I can do. No, I can't. There's no way to flank.

There's no way to flank. Can you do just a recall knowledge on both of these? Oh, I haven't done that. I thought I did. I will recall knowledge on this crustacean insect creature. Okay. What would be nature? Yeah, nature.

14. 14. 14 isn't enough, actually. I got all the stuff right here. I wanted to tell you some info, but I can't. I don't know what it is! Here's what you can do. You can take three points of bleed damage and then give me a flat check.

My gosh. Fail the flat check, but it's over. It's over. It is over. It's over. I'm still, however, slowed. Still slowed. Lucky.

I use my final action to yank the arrow out of my knee. Or the spark. I find the arrow. It's still in there. I'm digging out the little arrow. Ah! Ah! Buggles, what do you got?

Bugles what do you got Bugles is Gonna He's gonna dance his way into the room Further into the room Oh wait Right in front of Yeah buddy And as he's hopping about

He's going to Oh his aura is activated It's like It's like... It's like a blizzard forms around him. It's just... And fires

a ray of frost at her. Nice. Natural one. Oh! What is going on today? Both extremes today. Spell Famboni. Absolutely terrible. The dice giveth and the dice taketh away.

My goodness. There's been so many backs and forths. Backs and forths. Okay, what do you got? Benji. Benji from Esteline, South Dakota. Hi, Benji. I've never heard of Esteline.

Okay. Blood from the Sorcerer's Stone. In desperation, you force all of your being into your magic, drawing from your life essence for this single action. Flip a coin. Heads, the spell hits for normal, but you are now fatigued. Tails, the spell deals half damage, and you are slowed one for 1d4 rounds. So either way, you're still doing damage.

Do you have a coin? Roll a d20. Do people carry money on them? DC 11 flat check. What am I going to the laundromat? All right, I'll do one to three is heads, and the other is heads. Heads. The spell hits for normal, but you are now fatigued.

That's fine. I'm tired. The spell was going to hit either way. You put everything into it. All this dancing. With this creepy fumble. Eight points of cold damage. I get four temporary hit points from it. And I'm tired. And you're tired. And it exhausts you.

It's death. It just freezes and then hits the ground. Awesome. There are two doors to the south leading out of this room in this large area of the gnome encampment. The venue. Which one will you choose? Find out next week.

Yeah! I can't believe that was close. That was crazy. That was crazy. Natural 20, natural 1. Natural 20, natural crazy. Natural 20, natural 1. Natural 20, natural 1. Let's do that dance again, Joe. Stop laughing at me!

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