The Glass Cannon Podcast - Gatewalkers Episode 41 – Highway to Well

Episode Date: June 28, 2024

Deep beneath the Oatian settlement, the preserved memories of long dead elven heroes may be the party's only chance of returning home. Watch the video here: https://youtu.be/KYj-NuvMzRA This episode was sponsored by Demiplane, Foundry VTT and Norse Foundry. Check out Demiplane's Pathfinder Nexus and character creation tools at https://bit.ly/GCNOfficialTools See why tabletop gamers everywhere have made the switch to Foundry Virtual Tabletop at https://foundryvtt.com/gcp For all your random number-generating needs, visit Norse Foundry at https://norsefoundry.com Head to https://magicspoon.com/GCP to grab a custom bundle of cereal and try the magic for yourself, and don't forget to add their tasty Treats to your order! Use promo code "GCP" to save $5 off. Head to https://tryfum.com and use code "GCN" to get a free gift with your order today. For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com and for hundreds of hours of exclusive shows and benefits, make your membership official and join Glass Cannon Nation today by becoming a subscriber at jointhenaish.com. Watch new episodes when they premiere every Thursday at 8PM ET on youtube.com/theglasscannon. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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You are listening to the Glass Cannon Network, the premier source for role-playing game entertainment. Last week on the Glass Cannon Podcast. Look, see? Yeah. You see a small small bluish dot. Golarion. That is your world.

This is Castravel. Yes! Nailed it! What? This is their way to maybe get us back to our world. Possibly the key. Oh, yeah. These markings.

Yes, yes, let me see it. And the minute her hands touch it, she just collapses to the ground. And this very tall, androgynous looking elf walks forward. I have experienced this psychic signature only once before. It is the imprint of a soil, the Black Frost Whale. You notice she is starting to wither. No.

Oh no. Oh no. My mother, Iscariah, find my mother and retrieve the information about our soil. That will be the way to curing A'leli and your only way home. There's just one problem. Iscariah's been dead for 100 years.

Deep beneath Los Skialua's stony straits lies an ancient sacred site where the memories of the bests and brightest are preserved. Just beyond the edge of town, a group of these elves walk you past these huge trees with gnarled branches that loom over a wide circular stone well to a natural stone passageway at the bottom of the well that continues to descend and twists out of sight. And my mother, I said hello.

The adventure continues... now. Hey everybody, welcome back to the Glass Cannon Podcast. You know what I did yesterday that I haven't done in a long, long, long time? Take a shower. Shut up. You smell. You're oddly close though. You're oddly close.

Wait, I was going to say take a bath. No, no, no. Different direction. Okay. I took oddly close. Wait, I was going to say, take a bath. No, no, no. Different direction. Okay. I took a steam. Oh, the Schvitz. Yeah, the Schvitz. I guess you could call it a Schvitz.

You go to a bath house? Yeah, I went to a Turkish bath house. No, they, my gym earlier in the year installed a, the pool and the, because when they opened, they didn't have the pool ready yet. The pool was opened and a steam room and a sauna. So I was like, let's go. I love a good sauna. I love a good steam. Love it. And so I, I went to check it out a couple months ago. I look in and it's all coed. So it's like a coed steam room and a coed sauna. And I'm like, I don't know how I feel about that. That's a little weird.

What is it? Starship troopers? It's a little strange. I'm like, am I walking there and see a bunch of dongs? Or you might get lucky. And I'm like, I don't know. I don't want to take a chance. Is everyone naked? Well, I don't know what the deal is. So I was like, plus I got to bring an extra.

I can't go in there in my workout clothes. I got to bring a bathing suit. I got to bring a towel. I got to bring all this shit. I like to bring my keys and my AirPods and that's it. And my phone. That's it. Now I got to bring all this extra shit. You just bring the AirPods. You can just put them in and pretend like no one's there.

Oh, I do that all the time. There's times like my AirPods die and I just leave them in so nobody looks at me. But I have to bring flip-flops. It's a whole thing. But I said, you know what? I'm going to check out the steam. I'm going to do it. I don't care who's in there. Had the whole place to myself until about 10 minutes in another dude came in And I think he was in his underwear, which was a little weird But the thing about the steam room is you can't really see more than five feet away You could have been beaten off. I wouldn't even know who's concealed or hit. He was concealed to me Yeah, can see I know he was more than five feet away. So you'd be hidden, right?

Perhaps I think if I went to punch him in the face, I would probably land Land the blood. I'd probably sock him. Flat check? Flat check. Yeah, a little flat check. Yes. Uh.

That's so stupid. Such nerves. That's how we think in real life. You guys like a steam or a sauna? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's good to get the toxins out. All right, can we? The Airbnb I stayed at at Atlanta

had a sauna cabinet in there. Shut the fuck up. Oh, you're a. It's amazing. I thought you had one of our hotels. I'm like, I missed out on a sauna? No. No, but it was right in the Airbnb. It was like. Oh, you're amazing. I thought you had one of our hotels. I'm like, I miss that sauna. No, no, no, no. No, but it was right in the Airbnb.

It was like a little, it was great. I love both. I think I might prefer a steam to a dry sauna. The dry sauna, sometimes they get a little too much quickly. Yes. We'll get to you in a second. You're confused. I know, as soon as you said-

I'd like to ask a question. It's just a clarifying question. At a sauna, Joe doesn't know the difference. I was just gonna say one thing before. No idea what the difference is. I didn't know. I don't know the difference. When you were talking, say one thing before. No idea what the difference is. I don't know the difference. When you were talking, Joe went...

I'm not a sweating connoisseur. Asana, it's everything's... I'm not a rich asshole that has a gym membership. A gym membership. Asana is usually wood paneled and you sit down, there's hot coals and it's just really hot in there, but you can see everything. You pour water on the coals, sometimes there'll be steam. So you sweat in there.

You sweat in there. And sometimes there's steam coming out of the coals. And you're like, oh, I'm sweating. I'm sweating. I'm sweating. I'm sweating. I'm sweating. I'm sweating. I'm sweating. I'm sweating. I'm sweating. and you sit down, there's hot coals, and it's just really hot in there, but you can see everything. You pour water on the coals, sometimes it'll be steam. So you sweat in there.

You sweat in there. And sometimes there's limited steam. Very limited steam. But it's not just only steam. It's temperature control, 120 degrees or whatever. Steam room, you go in and it's steam and it's tiled. It's like a shower tile. It's like wet.

It's wet, it's a wet. What's the difference? It's a wet. One has more, more moisture. I feel like we're trying wet. It's a wet. What's the difference? It's a wet. In terms of the effect on you. One has more moisture. I feel like we're trying to, it's that moment in the Isle of Lucy

when you're like there are two words in the English language that you should never use. One of them is lousy and one of them is swell. Lucy's like, so what are they? I feel like that's Joe in this moment. Oh yeah. Oh. It's a dry heat versus a wet heat,

but I don't know what the difference in the health benefits are. I just know, I mean, I love a sauna. Don't get me wrong. But a steam room is nice because you get all that steam. You can inhale, but this is what I was going to say before he jumped in. Usually, there's like a menthol eucalyptus situation going on in there, and you inhale that, you're like, oh, let's fucking go clear my sinuses.

It smelled bad. There was none of that. And so I was like, oh, this kind of sucks. I was trying to do some deep breathing. So hold on. Let me get this straight. The co-ed steam room, which you were like, I'm not sucks. I was trying to do some deep breathing. Let me get this straight. The co-ed steam room, which you were like, I'm not sure what I'm going to see in there.

I could have told you in advance, zero hot chicks, and it was going to smell. Well, usually there's eucalyptus. There was no eucalyptus. Well, for the future. One old guy in white tighty-whities. And it smells like farts. You're smoking of menthol

You don't travel with your own you could I guess I should This frowned upon I brought a bag of Eucalyptus If you don't like the coed thing though There's a there's a place in Jersey called King Spa And it's a Korean spa and they have tons of drivers drive an hour and a half instead of using my free gym they have tons of stuff. I can just drive an hour and a half instead of using my free gym. Wait, hold on, let me write this down.

Also, I'm curious when he said he didn't like the coed thing. I don't think that was the problem. But it's like separated when you go in, so like the women go together, the men go together, and it's- All spas are like, all spas are like- Are they? I don't know. But it's like a traditional- I don't know if he has to go to Korea

to find a gender-separated spa. I could go to literally any spa that's usually separated. Oh, I didn't know that. I just thought it was a thing. Have you been to the Russian Turkish bath? That feels like a great thing to do. No, I haven't been to that. I'm always afraid Yeah, and jobs I don't want to be offered It's rude to say no just put your air pods

That guy doesn't want a hand job you love your job good You'll be proud of me putting up a position. That guy doesn't want a hand job. You love your job? Good. Me too. I don't think anyone. I mean, I might be leaving the conclusions here, but I feel like most people who are giving professional hand

jobs would prefer that you decline. We had a buddy. Oh, you can't. Who loves a good rabbit duck. And he would tell these stories that would turn your hair white, like a block away from here is a place. Don't want to know. My hair is already turning white.

Oh, no. I was like, that exists in my neighborhood back when I lived here? And he's like, yeah. Oh, my god. I wish I could tell these stories. A thoroughness with which she, what were you gonna say? The reason I like spas is I like the baths,

like a literal bath house. I went to one in Manhattan for a birthday present. And it's just like all different pools, like just different pools of water. It's fun. Are they all public? I mean, you have to pay to get it, so no, but like. But there's a bunch of other people in every pool

But it's limited but this one are they all hot the people like the pool Yes, and you know no, but it's like they'll have like a salt one, you know, and like you float in it It's really crazy and then they have like a deep plunge one that you like jump in and that's kind of tepid water and then You go to like a really hot one and you're supposed to do all these different, like a cold plunge and then a hot plunge and all this stuff. I like that. Yeah. More than I like sitting in a sauna.

I just get bored. I'm just like, oh, I'm so sweaty and bored. What do you do in there? You just sit? Yes. Can you have your phone out or is that a problem? No, because it's gonna get all hot. Yeah, it's gonna get all hot.

I think you're just supposed to sit there. The guy next to me had a phone. I heard him tap, tapping away. I'm like, what are you doing, man? Your phone's gonna get ruined by this. So you just have to like sit and relax. Yeah, like if you're good at meditating, I think this would be the place for you.

Yeah. It's like a willpower test too, because the hot saunas are like, your lips start to get hot. Like your salty sweat starts to heat up on your own skin. It's a crazy feeling. I mean, I felt like a million bucks when I came out of there. I went in, took a very, very cold shower.

It was like counting, it's gonna hold my- Get the circulation going. Get the circulation going. You know, cold plunges are all the rage right now. Yeah, people love them. Ice baths. Yeah. I mean, sign me up. I love it. 99 bucks to get one of those fucking things. I'm like a year or two away from having a fucking sauna, a hot tub, and a cold plunge in the backyard. I'm going to be that guy because I love it. I love all of it. It's a really popular upstate to have like a sauna on your property. Oh, common upstate then.

I hate sweating. I don't like being uncomfortable. I don't like being too cold. And this just sounds like varying like different levels of uncomfortable. And you're like, ooh, let me try this out for a while and not have my phone. I mean.

Yeah, let me get a room that its whole purpose is let me see how long I can stand being in here. Sit here with my thoughts about how uncomfortable I am and then be a different type of uncomfortable in the next room. At Kingspa, there's one sauna, because Kingspa has all these different hot rooms. There's like the amethyst room, the salt room, and you just go in and they're just like saunas. One, forget what the temperature was. It's like 200 something degrees Fahrenheit.

And you can't wear any synthetic materials. They give you clothes to wear because it'll like adhere to your body. You can't wear jewelry and they give you a burlap sack and you go in and you like put the burlap sack around you and you just sit there like a monk and you just contemplate. And you felt like a million dollars when you were going I don't get it.

Losing my mind. Follow up question. It's like being in a yurt. Yeah. Can you wear contacts? Oh, I don't get it. Losing my mind. Follow-up question. It's like being in a yurt. Yeah. Can you wear contacts? Oh, I don't know. I don't wear contacts. Not if it's 200 degrees.

Yeah, I was closing my eyes, too. Like, I was just like. By the way, not 200 degrees. OK. There's no way. That would be cooking you. You would be cooking, slow cooking. Hottest, dry, sauna.

Very hot. I'm sure it's quite hot. Especially with the burlap sack. But it's quite hot. Especially with the burlap sack. But it's not. But you have the burlap sack. It's gonna add a few degrees. All right, 100 something. As I was saying.

It's like every sauna. You can start cooking stuff at like 140. I'm sure it's short of lethal, which 200 degrees would certainly be it. I don't know. Sydney keeps bringing up these specific specialty places that are just like every other place. The ideal temperature, 150 to 195 degrees Fahrenheit.

So it does get quite hot. That is hot. You know, it's not uncomfortable when you know you're like going into it for an experience. You're like, I'm gonna shower afterwards. It's not like I'm gonna go give a lecture somewhere, like soaked. You're doing it and you come out and then you get that,

I mean, I felt great all day into today, except for my eye, which has been twitching uncontrollably for three weeks straight. Oh no. You gotta drink more water. That's the worst. I'm probably not drinking enough water.

I drink a lot of coffee in this water in that. That's not how that works. That's the second I start to twitch. You just gotta not be so stressed out, just relax. I don't feel stressed. Stop feeling stressed, Troy. That's the thing is I don't feel stressed. I'm not getting as much sleep anymore now that I wake up so early, but I don't feel stress. I don't feel stressed. I'm not getting as much sleep anymore now that I wake up so early, but I don't feel stressed. I feel really good, but my eye is

telling me different. The lack of sleep thing will do crazy things. Might be the sleep thing. Anyways, you've never been in a steam, huh? Never said I'm going to doze in a sauna. I think I sat in a sauna once. I think I was in a sauna once and yeah, it was like, this is really hot. It was cool though, you know, it was like you feel like you're sitting there trying to sweat out the bad shit or whatever Yeah, but is it all nonsense? No, man. It's good for you. What bad shit is in there? I like it. There's a lot of bad shit in there. You ever do the

Why don't you just go for a jog? Sweat it out. Lemonade. You do that first. What was the lemonade cleanse? Remember the lemonade? With tabasco. Yeah, what the fuck was that called? You were in the cayenne pepper, right? Cayenne. Cayenne. So I did it. I've done it twice.

I mean, this was a long time ago, but the first time I did it, it was amazing. It was like a spiritual experience. You fast for 10 days and all you can have is this homemade lemonade, which is like distilled water, lemons, cayenne pepper, and like grade B maple syrup. But the other part of the experiment is that every morning you drink 32 ounces of water with this Celtic sea salt in it and you cannot leave the house for an hour and a half because what happens, especially the first time you do the lemonade cleanse, is that you shoot black water out of your ass for For an hour and a half straight. For 10 days.

Every morning you do it, you're like, you cannot leave the house. And it is the most purifying feeling because like I did it when in my 30s, right? So it's 30 years of buildup, just like, when I did it again, like a couple years later, it wasn't as dirty in there because it was not as much buildup.

But the things that come out of you, holy shit. You belong in LA. I don't know why. Right? It's such a weird trait you have. This whole holistic health. Oh, I love it. It's like making a random sim that's

sporty and from Boston. But then they also have this weird high maintenance health trait that's out of nowhere. Well, you know, you get older and you realize like, tick, tick, talk, only so much time left. Tick, tick, talk. Yeah, but you talk. No, he wouldn't work in LA.

It doesn't work. Because he swings so far the other way. Like he's also horrifying to his body when we're on tour. Like we're on and out. Yeah, I was gonna say. That's true. He does some of the most terrible things and he drags you with him.

He's like, do this to yourself, hurt yourself. That's the one little window I have to enjoy a nice little cocktail. Stay up till 3 a.m. Drink this 10 percenter. Right, that's not enjoying a nice little cocktail. A little tipple. A little tipple.

Not a little tipple. Well, we all have our vices. Mine's like a little typical. We all have our vice. Like a good drink. My in-laws are in town, and they're retired. So they like having a couple cocktails, too. This is my wife's dad. And they had a bottle of Captain. I was like, let's fucking go.

I love Captain. Last night, we're playing wingspan. I'm like, I'm having a Captain and diet. Let's go. I pour it. Nice cocktail. Cocktail and wingspan is so fun. Oh, my god. So pour it. I'm taking Cocktail and wingspan is so fun. Oh my god.

Sounds amazing. So pour it, I'm taking a sip and I'm like, man this is, captain tastes funny. He goes, oh that's the 100 proof captain. I was like, what the hell are you guys doing drinking 100 proof captain? I mean it was a bottle this big. It's normally 70 proof, so this was like

having a high end bourbon. His captain is something you sip. Yeah, it's a real sipping whiskey. Sipping rum. Anyways, shout out to our new sponsor, Captain Morgan 100 proof, which we will all be drinking right after this quick break. This episode is brought to you by Dragon Ball Legends, the mobile fighting game. Dragon Ball Legends is the first card-based fighting mobile game based on the widely popular

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GCP and use the code GCP to save $5 off. Thank you Magic Spoon for sponsoring this episode. We should have an episode where we just sip on cocktails, like a real strong cocktail. That'd be fun. There's nothing wrong with that. I would do that. We really need a bar. Martini's, like martini's all around. Yes.

The old studio had a kitchen. We never really set up a nice bar. We always had whiskey in there, but we got to do something with some flair. We need to bring a caterer in here, like a real professional bartender. I can make some cocktails. We have two. Well, I know, but you guys have other things to do. Yeah, but they need to be here when we're recording.

No, exactly. Walk around. They'll like stand around the background, they'll hover with like Matt. I have a friend. They're like the ball boys. And when our drink is empty, they like sprint in, like pour another drink and sprint back out. We should have an on-set private chef slash barista slash bartender that is just here for our needs.

And a masseuse. Obviously, and a masseuse. Who comes up behind us while we record when we get scared. Can we get a plunge pool installed in there? And a sauna. And a slide. We got some space. Slide down.

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So check it out, 30 days for free. You'd be a fucking dumb, dumb not to do it. And you're gonna stick around because you can't listen to everything in 30 days. You simply can't, it's impossible. Lots of Sydney on there if you're into that. I also wanna give a shout out to our sponsors, Norse Foundry, Foundry VTT, and Demiplane.

The plane. Keeping these lights on. Lot went on last week. You guys have listened to that episode recently, some of you. I'm tempted to hear your thoughts on what happened last week before I give my sort of recap, as it were. Who would like to? Can we go in a circle? Can we all?

Yeah, you listened. Nice. Start it off. Wait, I wanna start. Oh. Oh, you're gonna start? We're on a fucking different planet. Yeah.

Yeah. I was right the whole time. You never saw that coming. Did not see it. I called it immediately. You did not say that. Yes, she did. I did. As soon as we saw the map, I was like, whole time. Kate was right. I called it immediately. You did not say that. Yes, she did. I did.

Hashtag Kate was right the whole time. As soon as we saw the map, I was like, this is cash or not. You read it online on Reddit. No, I didn't. I swear. I remember this very clearly. Unbelievable. The actual person who said it first was Skid.

And Skid gets a button. Are you serious? Wow. I swear to God, if I could flip this table, I would flip it. Listen to the tape. Was skid and skid gets a buck Listen to the tape I would flip it. Listen to the times. I remember myself as Kate This table weighs like a metric ton. Yeah. Oh My god, she's so bad. It was it really was skid when we we were all thinking we've all been there before Right, But Skid was the first one to say it and then you said it at the beginning of the next episode. No, no.

Watch the video tape, it's true. I think we gotta go back. I made a note. You need your receipts. Give Skid a bottle of that. Bring your receipts. I will, I'll go get them, like I did the last time. What will happen if Kate brings the receipts?

I will give them. Skid will have to hand that bottle. This network can't handle another reunion shot. They will riot. You did say it, but Skid said it first. And that's how it's like Skid was spoiled on this adventure. You're just trying to pit us against each other. I would love to give you a cap. Lord knows you need them.

But I'd love to give you a cap. Skid heard that one. But listen, you are on Castor Valley. You're on another planet. You make first contact with these elves. You are in Lohskealua. They are the oasia. They are the astronomers, the sort of divination magic and studying the stars. As we learned in cannon fodder, the constellations they see are the same that you would see if you were on Galarian. The constellations do not change. However, you are not in Kansas anymore.

You guys wanna fill in the blanks, you want me to keep going? Yes. Yeah, our first contact situation went really well. Yeah, shockingly well. They knew we were from Golarion, one woman in particular. Yes, Alelly knew that we were from the Blue Planet. She was like, I recognize your accents.

Your language, your language. Yeah, speaking common. And basically she got a message from Sakawatchee, who was an oracle. Sakawatchee. Sakawatchee, who's an oracle in Skywatch, which is a city in Brivoy. And they have a big observatory,

and so does this city in Las Calura. Las Calura. Las Calura, ohura. Los Galura. Los Galura. Oh boy. Los Galura. So she basically like was in contact with this other person. Just call it LA. It would be easier to remember.

We're in LA. The Griffith Park Observatory. And things were going really well and we were really getting along and she was like, basically, I think I can get you back home if we can open up this portal. And Zephyr was like, no worries, I have a key that does that. Oh, let me see. Oh, I forgot.

And then. This is what I remember from the first contact situation. Oh, Lily grabbed the key and then started dying like immediately. She's cursed. Shriveling up and then we realized it's probably the Abnobuliculate curse, which we didn't really think about

And then her what's his name? I said his name wrong You'll gentheal gentheal gentheal or their name gentheal got really mad and Was basically like you need to go talk to my mom who's dead No, dad a hundred years or so. Yeah my mom who's dead. Dead a hundred years or so? Yeah. I like they were like, oh yeah, she's been dead a hundred years.

I haven't even been to visit her grave, like 80. Yeah. And now we desperately need her help. Can you go? Yeah. Can you guys go? And he was like, I can't come though. Peace.

But yeah, so they were like, you can go down to this Grove area and go talk to my mom to save a lele to get you home. And that's basically our only option now. And Hubert pissed off a cliff and everyone got upset. And pooped. Oh, and pooped. And he pooped.

I think that's what made people a little bit more upset. I also think he was pleasuring himself over the cliff onto the beach. No. You never said that. Yes. Yeah, I don't think so. If you listen, you hear him say, I'm raining, it's raining babies on the beach. That's not what happened.

Listen back to the tape. I assumed he just didn't understand the difference between urine and semen. I think it was pretty clear in my mind what he was doing. But one other thing is Gentheal, when Aley's situation said, I've experienced this psychic signature once before. My mother Iscariah revealed it to me so that I would recognize it again if such a time should come. It's the imprint of a soil, the black frost whale.

His mother was a healer and part of a secret society, a society that was tasked with remembering the elves campaign against this Osoyo. Even Gentheal doesn't know what that entailed. If there's any hope of removing this curse from a lily, maybe curing the Abnoblod curse altogether as well as getting you home since a lily is the one that has made contact with this Sakawatchee on Galarian and is the head astronomer that could possibly open up some sort of pathway for you to get home. You need to go to this grove to speak with his dead mother. We also found out that in the grove or the Grove is protected by guardians, extraplanar guardians

that hold these memories in safekeeping the memories of their great ancestors. And so supposedly they're just keeping out monsters and other enemies in the deep it seems that there might be like Intelligent civilizations down here that are I don't know. I call them drowish I don't know. We'll see but like it sounds like there's people that live underground And so I don't know what exactly that means and also extra planar guardian. Did you say that extra planar guardians? Yeah Yes, a memory cache the memory cache cache like like most Troy NPCs They were deliberately vague when they could give more information about never been there I think he gave you a lot of crazy that he's never been there. He didn't tell us they are scholars

They are not adventures and it is dangerous the road to the memory cache is fraught with peril Why did they bury his mom there? I was a one thing that's common to the memory cache is fraught with peril. Why did they bury his mom there? I was like, one thing that's common to the elf society, they only bury their dead in places that are really, really dangerous to reach. Just over a century ago, the former elves took her down there because of the memories that she possessed. It was important to preserve her.

She was the last one, yeah. And since then, no one from this generation has gone down. I wonder if elves' generations work the same as we do, like every 20 years, or is it every like 150? How often do they procreate? What's their trend cycle like? They could bang anytime they want. They could bang anytime they want,

but when do they want it? When do they start feeling that kind of biological clock? Oh yeah, like around 200, like I really need to have a baby soon. Or if we knew what kind of music they were into, we'd be able to better understand like, okay, so this generation, they're really not into whatever that generation is into.

Right, was your dad an elf or your mom was the elf? They were at bell bottoms. My dad is an elf. That's really accusatory. Why? The way he said it. Was your dad an elf? Was your dad? The way he said it. Did your dad know? Did your dad know?

Did your dad? But wait, Zephyr's dad wasn't Elphie. Yeah. Did he love you? Zephyr? Yeah. No kid. Well, I think so. Don't all parents love their child? What about your mom? No. She's a human.

Did she love you? No. I mean, yeah. She's still alive? Yeah. Were they both around when you were growing up? Yeah. Really?

Did your dad run around on your mom? Childhood. Troy. I don't think so. Your dad like chose a mortal life? Yeah, I don't know. Are they both still alive? Yes.

Where are they? Yeah. They're back in Silver Strand Harbor just chilling. What do they do? Are they retired? Are you gonna be cool when you remarry? My mom's like a chef and then my dad's like a hunter, like a butcher.

Do they have any allergies? Do they have any what? Allergies. Allergies? You're going to make them dinner? Why are you asking that? I don't think so. Maybe seasonal allergies.

Everyone's got seasonal allergies. You have passed the backstory test. Well done, kids. Congratulations, congratulations. Though you did say I don't know about 17 times You don't know your parents allergies you have not done your character study cuz your dad love you. I don't know Never thought about it Your dad love you fuck we should start doing that to each other. Just intensely interrogate about backstories. You have passed the backstory test.

Yeah, backstory test. Congratulations. Did we get a ball cap? You have been... I might have thought about it. It's a really dangerous thing to do with us. I feel like we started doing that in the right mood. Someone would just like go off.

It would be like 30 minutes later, we'd rise from the backstory test. Yeah. You have been walked by a congregation of elves It would be like 30 minutes later we'd rise from the backstory test. You have been walked by a congregation of elves to this area, this well. Looks like there's a staircase descending. A murder of elves. A murder of elves.

Oh, can we also say just for us too, we're reckoning that we went shopping. Went shopping at the Elven outposts on the Oatians. We sold them some cool shit from Golarium. And they were happy to take it, and they gave you their versions of things that will have the same mechanical benefits. But I think flavor-wise, if you put some rune on your weapon, it doesn't look like a rune you can buy from Absalom.

Maybe the rune stones they're carved into are like those stones that Asta was stealing. That's fun They were so happy to receive our Galarian Goods that they paid full price. Yeah, they don't even know about the half pricing. That's so sweet. That was huge It was really huge. They paid quarter price. That's why we were able to get all those striking room Anyway moving on All right, so you are outside of this Staircase leading down the the elves say, see you.

And they start walking back. Oh. Oh. Well? Yes, it's a well. Bonds, would you like to go down? I'd be honored this way. I'll follow your lead.

Katana out. Speaking of Bonds, you guys ready to see Bonds? Oh, yes. Oh, do we have Bonds art? Oh, wait. Do you finally have it? We sure do. Shout out to Matt Forsyth.

Here is the Amicus Bonds. Oh, my. You guys, my. Oh my. You guys, my. Unfair bullshit. The first word that popped into my head was daddy Barnes. Daddy Barnes? I saw this and I was like daddy. Daddy Barnes.

Daddy Barnes. This is daddy, this is papa. Oh my god. This is daddy. This is daddy. Bad foresight. Wow. This is daddy.

Holy shit. This is daddy Barnes. This is so ridiculous. Look at that coat. This is zaddy bonds. This is so ridiculous. Look at that coat. This is why people should play role playing games. The voice goes with this. Make up handsome versions of themselves. He's so debonair.

Where are the tats? They're under the coat, right? The only one you've seen was poking out from his sleeves. It might be the only tattoo he has. No, there's no way There's no way is no full river dragon Don't wake the dragon So that coded stud goes down first.

Such a stud. You descend about 30 feet, and then you see a passageway. It's just darkness. Only Buggles can see, those of you with low light vision. The light that's trickling in from the passageway gives you a little bit of vision in but Buggles can tell you like the passageway just keeps going. You don't see an end. Are the Ramies You have any ability to

Shine a bit of light on the situation here. Yes Bonds just wait one moment and he does his casting and this ball of light Hover is over Barnes and stays there. And then he turns and he casts one over Asta and then he casts one over himself. And these three balls of light are just kind of hovering around us. Asta, Barnes and yourself? Asta Barnes myself and potentially Zephyr but she's shooting range anyway what does she care? Right. You know my dad loved me. At least your dad loved you you think. Give me one second because I want to put these lights on your character just to say

that. Sefer also has one. Sorry. I didn't know if it was four total, but it is. It's 20, 20 or is it? What is it? It's 20 feet of bright, 20 feet of dim. Last but not least.

But like, like save yourself the time. Zephyr, Brother Ramius in particular. I don't know about Asta. Do you have low light vision? Yeah. Yeah, so the three of us, it doesn't matter. It's just 40 feet essentially because. If you guys start moving in different directions, having the flickering light will look cooler on them.

Did you get dark vision from Talitha? No. In the ball set? I don't think we got mechanical effects. Remember, we talked about if I got the Darkvision, but I get the Changeling Feet is the effect. Like a flavor change into an animal. Changeling trait, the ability to get Changeling Feets, yes. Which I haven't used yet, because I'm only level 3, but I hope that will come around. That would be fun.

Wow. Alright, so Asta. Changeling Ancestry Feet. That would be fun. Wow. All right, so Asta. Change-ling ancestry feat. It would be cool. Very wild. To take one late, yeah. And you said Zephyr as well. Old Zephy-doo. Old Zephy-doo.

Zephy-poo. Zephy-poo, Zephy-doo. Here you go, Bonds. Thank you. Bonds, with this light that Brother amy is gives you who has it again The light all of us but buckles. Oh you gave it his effort to yeah, how do you hate bugger? Yeah, why he doesn't need it he has dark vision. Yeah, but it's pretty You can only have four orbs. Sorry bugles tried for active orbs

See this passage just twisting and turning and going on. Keep following it. I'd like to do a survival check. Okay. As we're walking just to see if no one has passed this way in a hundred years, if the evidence suggests that. That is a 17. 17. There are some little things that look like tracks, animal tracks perhaps. With 17,

I'll tell you it's hard to determine how old or how new they are. Is it recent, as of a week? It's certainly not years old. So there has been some... What are the tracks like? Like paws? They look like paws. Some look like paws, like quadrupeds. Like a smaller creature? Yeah, and then some look like lots of smaller creatures altogether. Can I roll knowledge on the tracks,

see if I can identify the... You can, you're gonna have to hit a pretty... Oh, I bet it's a mouse deer. On another planet, it's gonna be pretty tricky. So I think it's mouse deer. I'm using my diverse lore to use esoteric lore. If it's mouse deer, can I have another bottle cap? I'll think about it. Yes. Uh, 26. I'm using my diverse lore to use esoteric lore. If it's Mouse Theory, can I have another bottle cap? I'll think about it.

I swear. Uh, 26. I said it first. No one said it before me. I want that on the record. I'm the first guy to say Mouse Theory. 26, but with my dubious knowledge, even with a fail, I would get a piece of information.

I would get a piece of true information, a piece of false information. All right, the one that looks the freshest, we'll say, has sort of a simian quality to it. Interesting. Oh no. Asta immediately thinks of the scorpion. It's a cave orangutan.

Yeah. The scorpion monkey, and is like. Oh, right. Yeah. There's something very simian about it, but it's, you know, it's otherworldly. The dubious knowledge. When you fail, but don't critically fail,

or recall knowledge check using any skill, you learn the correct answer and an erroneous answer, but you don't have any way to differentiate which is which. That's fun. That is also fun. I also see the tracks of a Ferris wheel. That's crazy. Could be anything.

Based on my research, it could be either something simian or a theme park attraction. I have no way of knowing. I have no way of knowing. I really hope it's not the theme park attraction. You don't have a good first, do you? Don't know how to fight that. Ah, yes, that would be challenging. Guys keep going down this inclines, these declines, the stairwells from time to time built into the stone and then more twists and turns.

You feel like you go for about a mile or so until you see a circular staircase, reminiscent of the one that you came down to get to this passageway. And at the bottom of the staircase, the passage sort of opens into a wide landing. And we will go to the map. You guys can rearrange yourselves based on what you've decided. I put Barnes up front there, but... Brother Amias is all the way in the back and I can't see shit.

And I'm just like, I don't see anything on this map. Oh, I see why. Huddled in the back in fear. Huddled in the back. Passage opens up into a landing and to either side of the eastern exit of this room, the walls have been carved with identical images of leafless trees.

Roll an odd check on that. Yeah. Okay, that in 19 With the minus 2 will be a 28 28 yeah dubious knowledge. Yeah, you don't recognize the particular symbols or the what what they represent but it does seem like It is sort of denotes the entrance of something You know, like you don't know exactly what the trees mean,

but it seems like it was put there purposefully to denote like, welcome, you've arrived at the right place. And also there's a Tilt-A-Wheel somewhere within? Yes, and also a Tilt-A-Wheel. Welcome to Six Flags Over Castravel. I think this is the way in, shall we? Yes, proceed. Astofalos holding her katana.

Yeah, I've Kukri and my mirror out. Okay, now we don't really use exploration mode. It's something that we've kind of eschewed just naturally in the way that we play. But give me a sense of what everybody's doing as you're walking along here. We can play around with it a little bit. I think Zephyr's paranoid about if anything can jump out at us, especially if we noted that we saw like simian tracks.

So she's like hyper aware of any danger, maybe. Okay, so perception. Yeah, percept. Can I use esoteric lore, my knowledge skill? Just like seeing, like constantly scanning and see if there's anything I recognize from my research, my field work, my experience. Absolutely. Brother Amiens, I think, will be on guard for unseeable, magical sort of... I don't know, whether they're traps or defenses or whatever.

So he'll just continually detect magic basically. Okay. So he'll just want to know as soon as there's any magic within 30 feet. Okay. I think Buggles is just kind of absorbed by these images of trees here trying to kind of come to terms with what that could signify. Like here deep in the earth these leafless trees down here I think he's that image is fascinating to him. What about Asta? I think Asta similarly to brother Ramius is sort of like tuning in to the sounds and like the feelings of the air around her You know feeling for like a crackling energy or like force Changes of force like entering a new area that might have a magical effect around it. So I guess Arcana

Okay Great You turn the corner there Bonzi and you see, uh, another chamber up ahead sort of twists and turns to the south. Um, and the sky up above somehow peeks into this sinkhole chamber. Maybe there's a fissure in the ceiling with which some light is kind of peeking its way through very, very faint light.

How deep are we? Oh, is it a mile? Right? Like, yeah, I mean, you went a mile, but it was so many twists and turns and ups and downs, it's kind of hard to know how deep you are. It's like 20,000 leagues under the sea. It's like they're not 20,000 leagues deep. They traveled 20,000 leagues. He logs 20,000.

But you can see Barnes from your... No, I thought the same thing. I didn't know that either. Wow. I feel dumb. You can see that the hole in the ceiling with which this light is spilling through is hundreds of feet up. So the ceiling in this chamber is very high. I cast Magic Measure.

Is that a thing? What? You know how I know you made it up? You never looked at anything. See, skin slowly peering over is the best. What the fuck is she reading? I'm not familiar with all the spells. Like, does she want me to laugh? A hundred feet.

Couple hundred feet up there are narrow streams of water cascading down the walls in a dozen tiny waterfalls. So maybe this crack is one of many cracks where moisture from up above is finding its way down and there's these little rivulets, little waterfalls all coming down the walls of this sinkhole. And I say sinkhole because in the back of the room is a pool to the south. And beyond the pool, the ceiling starts to lower into a smaller cavern that turns the corner and then disappears. How does the ground look? Does it look stable? Am I walking in a quicksand here?

You know, it looks very stable This is sort of feel sort of like a cenote Yeah, yeah, yeah They filled with the fresh rain water and they slowly become caves full of water. Yeah, so cool. I would imagine right now Pugles actually know you guys can't even see the, you can't see the water yet, right? No. No, I don't think so. So you can just hear the water,

or maybe there's a dead eye going through the water. Oh, wow. Wait for me. It really does kind of emulate the experience of being behind a bunch of people, and they're like, whoa, look at this, like get out of my way. All right, I wanna see this.

Yeah, Buggles, you have the best view of it. Obviously it's in like monochrome Everybody roll a perception check now that you're in here Zephyr if you already rolled. Yeah, I'm gonna keep my roll What did What did everybody get starting with the go around the horn here with Joe? 25 for brother Amias nine 24 12 12. 12 also.

Okay, so what'd you get at 20? 25. All right, so Brother Ramius and Zephyr, you notice hiding among the plants that have started to grow up from this moisture are these two creatures that start to creep out at you. And they look? Absolutely disgusting. There's sort of a cross between

Frog and a multi-legged monkey and they have Like sort of a spider like face this ferris wheel face this Ferris wheel you guys can keep your perceptions but if you said you were doing something else besides perception then you can roll that fresh this is awful sometimes when you describe gross stuff you show us a picture and it's actually kind of cute not this one this is not this thing these are right out of your nightmares.

You said it was 24, Zephyr? Yes. And then Ramius was 29? 25. 25, why'd I say 29? Bugles, what'd you get? 12. 12, that's right.

And then Matthew? 26. 26, okay. Now how does this work? Wait, did you reroll Perception? No, I rolled my esoteric lore. You rolled esoteric lore, right, okay. So do I get, that's a separate,

the initiative does not count also as a recall knowledge, right? Even though I was, this is where I get lost in exploration mode. That's fair, yeah. I can look it up if you want me to. Yeah, no, I think I'll just make a ruling. Yeah, I'll let you recall knowledge with it.

That's kind of fun. It's not very often that you're gonna use esoteric lore for initiatives, so I might as well give you a little bone for doing that. Don't do it all. Now he's going to do it every single. You said. That's a free action basically. Let me look it up. Yeah, I mean esoteric lore isn't necessarily the lore that's going to help you with these creatures. You know what I mean? But that's the whole idea. It applies to all creatures.

It applies to everything. Yeah. Let me look it up. It really applies to creatures more than anything else. Yeah. It's creatures, haunts and... I look at it because we were basically using exploration mode as a trance. Haunts, curses and creatures. All right so you take a look and what did you get for your... So just so I'm clear did you want us to reroll the roll that we originally did or just add the difference? Yeah, no just roll our can. I rolled worse. That's a 10. Okay Got a natural two. I could tell by your question

Alright so they were hiding and so they will have lesser cover to those of you to everyone except Ramious and Zephyr at least on the first round here. That's how I'm gonna rule it. So depending on what they do. So the first one here on the right, let's make him appear. This one, oh God, they're so ugly. Yeah.

It kind of like with their six eyes, those six tiny eyes, They look at Barnes and just you feel this like surge of Mental energy like mental heat come at you. Give me a fortitude save Okay Seventeen 17. Okay, so that's a fail you take 17. 17 okay so that's a fail you take 16 points of all fire damage oh it was like all in your brain it was like you know what it is your body heat is like starting to rise something in the way that it looked at you is like raise

your body temperature to the point where you take 16 points of fire damage. Thank you. Good boy. It then jumps out and will go to bite Zephyr. You can try. I will try to bite you with my gross one tooth jaw. And that's a natural 20. Ah! Big shout out to Norse Foundry for that natural 20. Critical threat, critical threat, critical, critical, Ah! Ha ha ha! Big shout out to Norse Foundry! For that natural 20!

Critical threat, critical threat, critical, critical, critical threat! Here we go. 1D10 town, and I rolled a 10 on the 1D10. Oh my god. That'll be 30 points of slashing damage. This is the worst day of my life. Oh my god! I'm back, baby!

Jesus. Ooh, that's the first guy, he moved, he did that thing, bang, boom, it's now Barnes's turn. Okay, I haven't found an answer to this. It seems like we didn't choose a specific action to do during the Exploration Mode, so I think the fairest thing to do would be not to give me the recall of knowledge, so instead my first action, I will exploit vulnerability, which uses my Esoteric Lore. Yeah, I didn't realize that it would actually be something you can use all

the time and I don't think that's the spirit of the rule. 13. 13 to... This is against the standard DC for the creatures level. The standard DC for the creatures level. Good thing I always have that table open all the time. Now I have it. What is your roll? 13.

Alright, just regular failure. Okay, so I fail to recall a salient weakness about this creature, but instead I can exploit a personal vulnerability. Ah. Basically, I just get to add, it gets a weakness to all of my attacks. Okay.

Okay, and then I will, sorry, still trying to look that up. Barnes will activate the mirror. And another Barnes will appear. Can I get there? No, I don't think so. Oh yeah, I'll do, I'll move. Can I stand in this space with the rocks? Right there?

Yep. Twice the barns. So I'm flanking with brother Ramius. Just got hotter in here. It's funny because my friend was like, next time he does that, make sure to make a fish heads drop. Somebody said this to me as well. Because the guy, the band that did the song,

parody song fish heads is Barnes and Barnes. Ah, nice. It's fun. Two of them. I'm not going to do the song. But six people appreciate it. That's a 21 to hit. 21 to hit with Fake Barnes is a hit.

Nice. OK, and this will be OK. Nine points of damage plus, I say 12 points of damage, including the weakness. OK, 12 points of damage plus, I'm sorry, 12 points of damage including the weakness. Okay, 12 points of damage including the weakness. Good round for old Barnsy. Brother Ramius rolled a 25, what do you got there buddy? Wait, what was that again? Cause I forgot it.

What'd you roll again? Did you hit? Yeah. 21. Okay, yeah, cause with the lesson- And it's off guard. Yeah, okay, so you're good. And it's off guard. Yep, that's a hit still.

Brother Ramius. Brother Ramius seeing Zephyr take this massive hit is going to, oh man, this is tough. He's gonna attempt to- And what did he do, it bit me? Yeah. Yeah. Ugh.

It's long tooth. Oh man, brutal. He is gonna attempt to do battle medicine on you Oh my god Jesus Christ Go either way you know you never know It could go either way, you know, you never know. Yeah, but that seems I got the minimum possible success I mean it is just the lowest goddamn number you can imagine the special thing about Joey express the most Because it's such a big risk to do that on battle medicine and damn it 13 points of healing so he will heal you for 13 and then he will... every monster Troy

has he gives them attack of opportunity even if they don't have it. Shit, I'm gonna take the risk. I'm gonna take the risk and cast a spell next to this guy. Does it provoke? It doesn't attack you. I will shoot a Divine Lance right in its face, like right up in its face. Okay. Bam! It's off guard because you are flanking with bombs. Divine Lance.

Really aggressive. I really got that visual there. It looks really aggressive. Natural one. 20. Hit. Yes! Oh, yes! Nice. Beautiful, and that will be four points of damage.

Huzzah. Four points of damage. One from minimum, and that's his turn. That's his turn, Zephyr. Whoa, all right, so she's still down almost half her hit points. So she, I'm assuming does not have her bow out in this tiny little tight quarters. So she's gonna do assuming does not have her bow out in this tiny little

tight quarters. So she's gonna do one two punch the regular way. Flurry of blows with the fisty fists. Okay let's do it. Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on. Oh, oh, oh, oh, 26 to hit. The first one. That's a hit. That's a hit. I'm just gonna roll the hits first and then stunning fist. Yeah, cause then you can combo the damage, yo. Oh, the second one is... Oh, it's effort! 22 to hit. That's another hit. Yes, oh my God, they both hit.

So stunning fist. Oh, all right, so I'll roll it. Make a fortitude save, please. A fort save? Ooh. 24. Oh, that's a pass. All right, that's fine.

But two hits, awesome. So that's 26. Let's go. So that's 7. Oh, I think I have a max damage on that one. Oh my god. That's 16 points of damage. 16 points.

Keep it right back to it. Damn. So yeah, desperately striking out with like a big jab cross. The cross definitely hits square in the face, max damage. But since she's still very much down, she's going to take 35, her not full 35 feet, but just move back away towards that entrance there so she doesn't get surrounded at all.

And then I guess last action, try to make some sort of knowledge check desperately. Like any weaknesses that these guys have. Or you could do a nature or a arcana. Anything else you might wanna try? Nature, please. It's gonna be hard, obviously these don't exist in your home world.

Ooh, my God. All these big numbers. Action Kate. Action Kate, there she is. 23. It's pretty good. I think that's good enough to give you some information here. I don't think there's any reason for you to know

what these things are called, but I will say that, what is actually gonna be helpful to you? Weakness. Weakness phase. Yeah. One weakness. Maybe two. I won't get one. What is actually going to be helpful to you? Weakness weakness, please. Yeah, why don't we have any maybe two? I won't get one. They don't have any weakness you could give them one And their most they have weakness five to physical damage beneficial thing I could know all physical magical and energy damage The one the one small weakness. Yeah, I mean, I'll give you something that's going to be helpful here because you did pass

this check. They are not very fortuitous. Okay. They're not very fortuitous. Okay. That's helpful. So, perhaps my Stunning Fist will break through at one point. When you hit it, you feel like you should have been able to stun it, but it really had to steal itself with all its power to hold that back.

So you do feel like maybe a little light on the fortitude. Interesting. I'll let you guys know that. All right, next up it is the other one's turn. Terrifying Spider Frog will fix its gaze on Asta. Asta, give me a fortitude save as you start to feel a little hot under the collar. Hey, I was rolling bad before, let's go.

Oh, that's gonna be a 27, no worries. 27 to success, you are not affected at all. Wow. Thank goodness. I just, and she's immune. I just grit my teeth staring down. And it just like really bears down, it'll upset you harder.

Give me another four to two. Oh my god. Snow. Does it have a multiple eyeball penalty? There actually is a really cool, I've never seen a mep. A mep. A mep.

It takes the mep. Takes the mep. 23. 23, you're fine. I just, I growl, I growl back. It takes the map. 23. 23, you're fine. I growl, I growl back. It's a battle of wills here. Alright, just for shits and giggles,

I'm going to continue to do it. Because where he's standing, he's going to get cover, so I want to stay there, because if I were to move, I would lose that cover, so I just wanted to see if you'll roll that one. Is there a map on it? Does it get a little weaker? Basically, I can tell you, if you'll roll that one. One more time? Yeah. Is there a map on it? Does it get a little weaker?

Basically, I can tell you the Fortitude DC goes down. 16? To 16. Yeah! Oh yeah! Yeah! My god. Wow.

I will never, I'll go on record and say I will never in my life pass three saves in a round. That was insane. That was crazy. That's amazing. That's amazing. Alright, I was hoping you'd get that one. That is cool that the 42 DC drops. Yeah. Really interesting. Each of her rolls went down too. Yeah, they just hit a little less. You still hit and outlasted them. Now it's Buggles' turn. Wow. Okay, Buggles. So I'm within 10 feet of this one that just attacks Ramius. So that puts me in melee range of my Ignition.

Oh yeah, that's right! Yeah, so pop! He's with the fiery snap of his fingers. No, it's a miss, I'm sure. Shit! And then with his third action, he is going to reach out to Zephyr and cast Thermal Stasis. Ooh. What is that? That will give you resistance four to cold and fire until the start of my next turn.

Awesome. That's great. If they were to fix their gaze on you. Okay. Now it's Asta's turn to finish out the round. Okay. So yeah, Asta is gonna charge, just run five feet over to where this little fucker is.

And- Get out of my head. Have you ever ran five feet before? She just takes one big- Run at full speed for five feet before she just takes one Pools our hamstring Came up short stop so fast tweaked my knee I shouldn't have done that But yes, you kind of can't she couldn't see it You know she's got this low light so she runs up, and then it's right there, and she's just going to

Spell strike at it okay, so let's see. Let's see indeed. Come on, I'm gonna do... It has lesser cover right there. Gouging claw as I strike out with my katana. Tits. 12. Nope. Nope. Pfft.

Pfft. Pfft. Pfft. Cut! That's very nice. Did I do it again? Here I go. Sure. You're out of action.

No, she, oh, Spellstrike is two actions? Oh, Spellstrike is two and I moved. I thought she was kidding. I was like, it's a good joke, Sydney. Wrote it down in my diary. Used all your juice on those Fortitude saves. That's the end of round two, excuse me. That's the end of round one, round two, right after this quick break.

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The terrifying spider frog who is pretty beat up and currently flanked by Barnes and Ramious. All right, I'm looking at this weak, grey-skinned priest. It will stare into your soul. Give me a fortitude say No kidding no kidding this is ripe for fumble zoning 16 It's a regular failure and you take max damage 17 points fire damage. I should just your body heat is just 17 points of fire damage. I should And then we'll turn on Barnes, with a bite as well with the map.

Natural 20. God damn it! Lafali! On a roll! Jesus Christ! I mean, this die is almost un-fucking-fair. All right, so it's a 25 to hit. That hits.

Okay, that was with the map. Okay, let's see. We're doing the max damage, let's see we do the max damage, let's see Pretty close one off of max two offsense. It's gonna be doubled And 28 points of slashing damage say that's 28 goes down Down goes man, let's Say that the barns that goes Ali. And let's say that the barns that goes down is... I love that you can choose.

The one that he hit, we'll say is the one that he hit. Be worried if he hits that one and the other one. That one stays. I'll just move it. So he disappears, right? Yeah. Well, that one stays and the other one disappears. I see. Okay, cool. Alright, so that pretty good round for that guy. Boom, takes a bite out of you. Boom, does that. Boom, okay, cool. All right, so that pretty good round for that guy. Boom takes a bite out of you

Boom does that boom crits you. We were doing so well. We were playing strategically. Same. Thank you, Norse Foundry Barnes it's actually no Barnes You will move in the initial order because you are dying a condition you are quite familiar with It is brother Ramius this turn brother Ramius. You aren't doing too. Well either. I know we're just insane The way you roll He's going to attempt to heal Barnes it's not really an attempt. He will pray to bring Barnes back. So I will heal Barnes See here all right that is 23 points of healing. Oh wow.

Nice. Whoa, this white light surrounds you. Level three, man. Level three. And then Brother Ramious will flee out of the combat down the corridor, never to be seen again. Ramious leaves. Zephyr's turn. Zephyr, you see Barnes go down.

Ramius brings him back to life. He's laying on the ground wounded, prone, without his weapon. So since he's laying down, if I move up to where Ramius was, there's no flanking. You still get flanking because he has an unarmed strike he could do. Okay.

Yeah, he's still technically threatening. You can flank with this friend, or my other friend. Nice. So she takes a step up. Again, attempts flurry of blows with her 50 fists. Okay. See if we can get... Becoming a bit of a fister.

Is that what they call people who fight with their... Yeah. It's like Mike Tyson's famous heavyweight fister. The first one is a 20 to hit. Yeah. Fists. It's like Mike Tyson's famous heavyweight system. Uh. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. The first one is a 20 to hit. Well, the best fisters of all time. That's right. I mean, I wouldn't want to be in the ring with that fist.

Ha ha ha ha ha. 21? 20 to hit for the first one. 20 to hit is a hit. Nice. And then the second one. That one definitely hits. It's a 24 to hit for the second one.

There we go. So, 42 to save, please. Fortitude save, keepin' it comin'. You know it's weak on the fort and that is a 13. That's a fail! That was awesome! What happens when this... They can't take an action, right? Probably stunned one.

Yeah, you're stunned one. I rolled that damage. Awesome, so damage. Stun that will... I mean with the damage he was laying out with three actions, now having one less, we could. 12 points of damage total. 12 points of damage totes, and he's stunned.

Good round for Zephyr. So yeah. A couple rounds for action Kate. Action Kate. Step in. Give up the bow. Bow, pam, with her stunning fist. Pew, pow.

And then takes a step back to protect Brother Remus a bit. Cover his cowardly retreat. Yeah. Remember, you'd also then not be giving Barnes flanking. Might be better. What do you think, do you want me to stay up there? If you could stay up, since you didn't take him down, if you could stay up, that might be helpful.

All right, I'll stay there, and I guess I can either take one more hit with the map or. Could be eight barns. I'll aid you, okay yeah. What should I aid you in? My attack. Okay.

Okay. Done. Done. I'll be like I know right where to hit him. Every time. Maybe you're distracting him in a way that could give barns an opportunity to strike from the ground. Well, it's the other terrifying Spider-Frog's turn, and that one is Manoamana with Asta, and has yet to be hit.

Put him up. I think I have to start with the old eat beam. Give me a fortitude save. Oh, god. Nine. Fortitude save. Oh. Gonna fail.

Oh. Twelve? Almost a critical failure, but it is just a regular failure. Time to take some damage. Oh! That is going to be 13 points of fire damage. You just feel your body start to warm up

like you're being doused in lava. Then it will go to bite you with its jaws. No natural 20 this time around. In fact, only a 13. Miss. Okay, and then since it worked last time, let's try it again with its jaws. No natural 20 this time around, in fact, only a 13. Miss. Okay, and then since it worked last time, let's try it again with the map. Natural one.

Oh! Wow, what's its name? What's its name? It came back around, it has no name, but it doesn't matter, nat one is a nat one. Too close to the sun. Yeah. All right.

What did you get? It doesn't have a name. It sounds to me like its attack is magical. So let's go with a magic fumble. It doesn't have a name. It doesn't have a name. Doesn't matter, all natural ones are fumbled. Oh, really?

Yeah. Okay. What? Natural 20s are crits if they're a named character. Oh, but. Natural ones are fumbles. Yeah, yeah, fumbles, yeah. Oh, today I learned.

I learned, I was this. Today I learned. Today, you're old. From the very beginning, and everyone forgets old. It's been true from the very beginning and everyone forgets every time. It's been true for seven years. Really, it's a funny little blind spot. In 2e, it just does not stick in my head.

Does it work differently? There's so many different ways to crit. Because there's fumbles without rolling a natural one. Right, right. I wonder if people, I imagine they do, play 2e without the plus 10 minus 10 crit fumbles. You think so? That's such a major part of 2e though. I know, but I bet you can do it without it.

I'm sure. I imagine some people do it. Does it mean you should? The thing is like, normally fumbles have no consequence in 2e. This is one circumstance in which they do if you roll a natural one for us. Most times in the game, on an attack, it doesn't matter. When we first first played the play test, that was one of the things that I remember

being like, oh I don't like that, because it was a big change. I like a natural 20 being a crit, a 1 being a fumble, and when you expand your crit range, like you did in 1e, like having a 19-20 or an 18-20 be a crit, that to me, I like more. And I still to this day don't love the plus 10 minus 10. But you kind of- I don't understand what you're saying. I don't like that you can crit by going 10 over the AC or fumble by going 10 under. I like that.

Which doesn't have any significance. You get to crit more. Yeah, I would take that. I know, I don't like that. I like that a 20, because it's a lot rarer. Not for me, but for- No, you had to confirm in one E. Right.

So it was way rarer. I would take that over the confirm any day. I hate the confirm. Yeah, so frustrating That's it can be incredibly the most deflating natural 20 imaginable Yeah, that makes sense, and it just makes like a high die roll Fun and also like what we're saying when you say you crit more is you will never Crit bosses yeah of any kind even unless you're moderately higher level unless you roll a natural 20 but bosses can crit you all the time Yeah, yeah, and sometimes you will roll a natural 20 against them and you still won't crit. Yeah, right exactly. Yeah. Yeah That's one thing that I miss because I did I did like that a little bit of a masochist

I get it. I get it. Critting more is more fun. But also like. They rebalance the crit effects on a lot of stuff anyway. So it feels, it doesn't feel OP to me. It just feels more fun. Yeah, I feel like we need to do something for the fumbles, the minus 10 fumbles. Cause right now it's just like, you miss.

Nothing. Yeah, if we could. So it's just weighted towards success and there's no penalty for. Yeah. Unless you net one. Self-inflict a wound every time. I also think we're skating through this campaign. That's true.

Let's make it a little more general. I mean more general and not so much the campaign. But the way that these are balanced, especially the way these in this AP are balanced, a miss is devastating. Every miss is like a character could die. It's like a lease of a turn. Remarkable. Every miss is like a character could die. He's like a lease of a turn. Remarkable.

Well, I'm just saying like you get the bonus at a 20 and 10 over. There's no penalty unless you roll it. I've thought of it many times. Like how come a natural two against this thing doesn't mean something worse happens than a regular miss? We need Curtis, man. Sure.

Because we would die. He loves sweating, he loves drinking lemon juice from his cousin. He and black blood. It came out of my head. The grittier blood. It came out of my butt, Kate. Pay attention. It came out of my butt, Kate. The black stuff came out of my butt.

Can you read this, Bumble? This one from Derek in Portland, Maine. That's the real Portland. We all just saw that. You are so embarrassed at how badly you just missed that you become self-conscious and you take a minus one to all melee attacks for the next 1d6 round. This guy is embarrassed. Nice.

Minus one to melee attacks. You also take a minus two penalty to all charisma-based checks blah blah blah, won't matter. No charisma-based checks. Is that a beak or does he just have two teeth? Teeth. They look like rodent-like teeth. Yeah, it looks very rodentian. Yeah.

It's like a... I don't see a frog. One big fang and then a little kink kink kink. Yeah, frog is like a... I don't see a frog. I don't see a frog. It's got a frog body. Turn your laptop to the side and you're like,

I see a spider when I do that. Spider. Yeah, it's a spider. Oh, it's a beak. And then like a baboon nose. Yeah, baboon. Or is it like a mole tooth? Oh, it is a beak. It is a, and then like a baboon nose. Yeah, baboon. Or is it like a mole tooth? Oh, it is a beak.

It is a beak. You gotta look closer. The shading looks like a tooth, but yeah, I know it's a beak. I see a lot of Thompson's gazelle in there. Oh, that's worse. That's what I see. You know what it looks like? Kind of like an octopus mouth.

Yes. The mouth of an octopus. Yeah, I love his little feet. You love him? Love it. You wanna pet one of these? Hi, Mimi. All right, so that was like my last, right?

Yes, that was your third action. Yeah, that was your third action, yeah. All right, now it goes on to Buggles. Buggles. So Buggles is like frustrated at this, the lack of effect of his last attacks. And this anger morphs into the emergence of the Kulakandas. Globe of frost emerges around us.

It reaches out and a frostbite. So give me a fortitude save. Fortitude save? Yes. Bad nine. Ooh! That is a critical failure. Yes! Yes, that should be!

That is a critical failure. Yes! That makes a difference when you're free to go on a spell and shit. Okay. So that is 22 points of damage. It just turns into an icicle and shatters. Nice! Nice, Buggles!

Oh, huge. Huge. And then with his last part of his round, he reaches out, the Buggles part of him reaches out psychically to Barnes. And it's just like, get up. Get up. And soothes him, heals him for eight points of healing.

Oh, hello there, Buggles. Oh, hello. A little soothe action. Oh, I feel much better. Thank you. Comes back around to Asta. Asta, you're toe to toe with this thing. Took a little bit of a chunk out of you with that heat,

but then missed on two bites. What do you got? Asta is going to swing her katana around, like she's going in for a hit, and then zzz. She disappears and reappears just down. Oh, and I disappeared off the map accidentally. Oh, I'm back. Oh, that was cool.

Did you do that? Oh, that was so cool. She flickers back in and then immediately swings upward with the katana in her dimensional assault to attack. Nice. Am I flat-footed for that? I feel like I should be. I don't think I am. I don't think so.

I feel like I'd be like, oh fuck! I'd be a little off guard. It would be awesome. I mean, hey, if you want to flavor off guard yourself. Nah. Okay. I'm good. 25. 25.

25's a hit. Okay, so that is, D10 of damage. D10 of damage. It's gonna be four, five, six, seven points of damage. All right, first hit on that guy. And then I'm going to spell strike. So. Try to.

Well, I'm. Try to. I'm going to. Oh, she's gonna. All right. she's gonna Show me what you go. I take the map But I needed to use the dimensional assault to recharge the spell sure is it you could spent the action You just spend the action, but I want to get in the most amount of hits if this crushes. It'll be awesome watch this get it 13 It anyway 13. It wouldn't hit anyway. And that's my turn.

Okay. Actually 18 might have, but probably not. No, definitely not. Yeah, mine was so far as 20. It would have been a 16 that we've hit. Top of round three, it's Barnes's turn. Barnes, you have moved in the initiative order because you went down and you're still down and you're wounded and you don't have a weapon. But I've been feeling very soothed because Buggles was just tickling my brain.

That's nice. Barnes will pick up his Kukri stand and then, let's see, oh, that changes the equation here because I think I... It's like we're listening to Phil Collins. Is that what it sounds like? I can feel it coming in the air tonight. Barnes will stand, draw his chakram, throw it.

Oh! So not the Kukri zone. So you're leaving the Kukri. No, I'm staying where I am. Nope, I only have 20 feet. So I'm gonna take the, I'll stay. God! Just standing and having to pick up your weapon. I know. Just there's the three action economy and just such good like, oh, I love it so hard. That's

why we should like try to knock people prone as much as we can. Yeah. Yeah. Really messes up your... Yeah. Yeah. Especially you, Kate. Me. Yeah. You're like, you're a martial artist. Yeah, I should. Martial artist. Well, you. You're a martial artist. Yeah, I should. Martial artist. Well, I tried to trip the snail and we saw where that got us. Well, that was.

These also have six arms. Okay, Barnes will. Why does every enemy have 100 centipede legs? Barnes will grab his kukri, stand, and attempt to demoralize. Okay. Help. What do you. How should I aid you? I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say,

I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm gonna say, I'm what we did to your friend here? I don't have Intimidating Glare though, so this is probably gonna be useless, but.

That would be a. Against my Will DC? 26. Against my Will DC, that's a success. Oh! It would be 22. Minus four. It's minus four if he doesn't speak English.

22. Common. Still a success. Nice! Okay. So he's what, frightened one? And he's already embarrassed. He is. He's so embarrassed. Now he's embarrassed, frightened one? And he's already embarrassed. He is.

He's so embarrassed. Now he's embarrassed and frightened. That's a minus two to his attacks. Frightened one. Okay. Basically, the other thing basically is giving him frightened, right? Or is it just minus one to attacks? Minus one to melee attacks.

Okay. And that is Barnes' turn. It's now Brother Ramias' turn. How you feeling there Ramious? Back to the Ramu. He feels terrible. He is gushing blood. He can barely stand But he's gonna try to focus on bringing this thing down. I guess Asta Asta didn't take a big hit right? Yes, she did. Yeah, she's oh I mean not I'm okay. Yeah, all right. She's...ugh. I mean not...I'm okay.

Yeah. Alright. He is gonna just try to attack the creature then. Okay. What are you gonna do? Actually, yeah. He'll attempt to attack the creature. Here we go. With the Divine Lance and he misses and then he will... 13. Yeah. Shut up. and then he will... Maybe not. 13. Yeah, shut up. And then he will, he'll stay where he is and he will try to aid Zephyr if she attacks the creature. Okay, well it is Zephyr's turn.

Oh right, awesome. So I'm going to keep doing what is working, run up to the creature. There! And he's going to tell you its weak spot, that's a 21. All right, so that's plus one. Plus one to both Stunning Fists. First attack.

So again, Stunning Fists, gonna try the old Jab Cross into the face. Jab Cross! Math is 26 for the first hit. Wow, that's a hit. That's some math. And then the second hits, it misses, it's a seven. Okay.

So stunning fist. Okay, you only need to hit with one, right? For stunning fist. Fortitude save, it's fortitude is down and I failed the game with an 11. Nice. So you're stunned one. Oh my gosh.

Wait, that's like a critical fail. I don't think that matters. It's probably stunned two, let me know. I don't have the stunning fist in front two. Let me know. I don't have the Stunning Fist in front of me. Or stun three on a critical failure. Wow. Whoa, no way. Wait, yeah.

You're out for the round, I guess, if that's... Yeah. So it's stun three? Yeah. Amazing. Oh my god. That's amazing. That's amazing.

Wait, what? Did you roll? I rolled an 11. No. Yeah, my class CC is 19. So that's 21. That's 10. That's 10 of both. 10. For critical. It would have to be 21. No. Yeah, my class CC is 19. So that's 21. That's 10. That's 10 above.

10. Or critical. It would have to be 21. 21. Yeah. How dare you. It's okay. That was so exciting for a second, Kate.

Oh no. Kate's doing my... I can't read. That was just basic math. Still stunned. Reading includes numbers. Still stunned one though. 26, that's six points of damage. Six points of damage, okay.

She's gonna take a couple steps back because she's still half down. Cup steps back. It is that guy's turn. He has stunned one, so he'll only have two actions this round. He doesn't like what you just did. He stares at you, give me a fortitude save.

Wouldn't blame him. You don't have the thermal save. I don't have that anymore. His DC is decreased by one. The DC of the save. It's a 10. The DC of? His save is decreased by one.

Right, because of the, yeah, it actually updates here on Foundry VT. Doesn't matter. It's a 10. Oh, come on. It's a 10. Oh, come on. It does matter. I tried. It might matter.

It does matter because that would've been a critical failure. Oh! It's not a new word? Because it's frightened, it's just a regular failure. Whoa! Oh! That's huge. That is huge.

And shout out to Foundry VTT. I mean, it is, I can't tell you, all those years when I had monster stats and I'm like adding conditions, little fucking note cards trying to remember shit, the fact that I can't tell you all those years when I had monster stats and I'm like adding conditions little fucking note cards trying to remember shit the fact that I can just add frightened and like within the Text of this ability the fortitude save goes down awesome absolutely amazing. That's really cool. Thank you foundry VTT You're still gonna take some damage And it is going to be plus five fourteen points of fire damage

Still up? Getting hot under the collar and it is going to be, plus five, 14 points of fire damage. It's getting hot under the collar. And then it's going to attempt to bite Ostum. So you stand him right there, I don't have to move. Here comes the jaws, minus two to this Jonski. One of them is on there, one of them's in my head from a fan crit. Miss.

Yes! All right, you have to finish it this round. Yes. I'm going to, That's the end of your turn. No you All right, you have to finish it this round. Yes. I'm going to... That's the end of your turn. No, you can't, you're stunned. No, that's right, I'm stunned. Stunned?

Let's go! Go to work! Gooses. Stunned, now I lose that stunned Jonski, and I lose Frightened as well, but I still, how many rounds am I? Do I have that bullshit thing, the minus one to attack? I think you had to roll it.

Yeah, it's 1d6. 1d6. 1d6. Oned6, one round. It's over, it's all over. He's back to fucking fall. We have to take him out this round. Take him out. So scared.

So scared. Well, it is, fucking bug. Come on, bug. Come on, come on. So, light him up. Is like, you know, the aura again shifts the burning embers and he stalks across the battlefield like Drew Barrymore in Firestarter. Picture it perfectly.

And pop! The ignition, he'll try one more time with his ignition. Like Drew Barrymore in Charlie's Angels 3. 26 to hit. Yeah! 26 to hit as I ant. OK. Now this all, this all, and I'm amping this, by the way. So this all like went up like quite significantly.

Ooh, nice! At level three. Ooh. Yeah, OK. Oh my god. Sorry. Oh no. So excited. Oh no. So excited.

Oh no. So many dice. It is doing damage. That is 24 points of fire damage. Wow. 24 points of fire damage. My. Okay.

I mean it's over. It really wasn't hit yet. Well let's see Asta, can you finish it off? Okay. I'm going to spend one action to recharge the Spellstrike. Zoop, zoop, zoop, zoop, zoop. And then what are you channeling into your jaw? I'm gonna channel in the gouging claw again

because it's 3d6 of slashing. Because it looks like these things bleed. Sorry, 25 points of fire damage. Okay, you said 24, so it's another one. Did you die? Dead. All right, so you's another one. Did you die? No. Dead. All right, so you see her new on her katana, this rune, this elvish rune glow

as she's getting ready to go in for the killing blow. Greater striking. Die! Ah! Oh man, they go one there, Sid? No, it's just a four. It's the most unfunny thing. I know.

They get a 14. Can I put my bottle cap? You only have one? Yeah. You wanna reroll that attack on a dying creature? That's the funnest way to do it, I'm just mad. I'm just mad. You know what?

I'm giving to the economy. Great. There we go. You only had one character die. Sorry, I threw it. Like it's smart to save it for dying, but it's not fun. It's not fun. It's not fun.

And you know what? I appreciate that to the point where I want to see what you roll. Oh. I thought you were going to just give me one. That's what I wanted you to do. You roll a natural one. 90, 19. Oh!

Worth it! That's it! That's it! That's a 29, isn't it? Yes, plus 10. You sure, Sydney? Yes, it's a plus 10. Sydney. Sydney.

Vicious Emanuel? Yes. Are there any other pluses? That's a crit. Yes! Yes! All right, double damage across the board. Critical crit, critical crit.

Okay, this is a lot of damage to roll a spell and attack. This is why you play Megas. All right, so that's nine for my hit, and then the- So 18. That's double? Double, yes. So 18 physical. Okay. Or 18 first slashing.

11, 11 with the gouging claw spell. So is that also true? 22. 22. 22. 22. And it is dead. Yes! Yes. Yes! Hell yeah! Phenomenal!

Worth it. That was teamwork. Amazing. Amazing use of a bottle cap. That was amazing. That was good use. That was very heroic. He's not gonna.

If you do it, it makes it worse and he'll never give you one. He said, no, he said you only get bottle caps for doing things that are bold or heroic. You just said it was heroic. Or if you guess a correct answer to something that nobody asked 20 episodes ago. You just said it was heroic.

You did it first. It was very cool, it was very cool. Hashtag, Kate shot first. The best part about it was you probably could have just attacked it with the map and saved your bottle cap and killed it instead of being all heroic. I couldn't have because I used my action to recharge my spell strike.

It's true. Oh, right, yeah. It's true. Probably would get a bottle cap. It's so true. Probably. Probably not. I gotta go. I gotta get out of here.

You guys are in this cave situation, and there is a pool up ahead. You see there's like a little stone there, which luckily you could leap to. But drip, drip, drip, drip, drip, drip, water. Brother Rami is just standing there. Just like. Zephyr sits down.

Zephyr sits down. Zephyr sits down? She's got like ten hit points. She holds her head that is burning and she sits down on a rock. Why does every place on this cursed planet have to be swarmed by these hideous creatures? He comes over to Zephyr. Come here! Okay, alright, just be quiet. Not so loud Okay, she gets up. I've got something for this

And it'll patch you up. He's going to treat wounds I'm gonna tempt something here in my frustration. He is going to Attempt to increase the DC of the treat wounds. Oh, yeah And we'll see how that goes. It's always good when you're doing surgery. He's being like a little rough. Agitated and angry. And then you're like, you know what,

I'm gonna make this a little harder for myself. Is there a benefit? There is a, yeah, there is a benefit, but he fails. And so no healing is done, but he doesn't fumble. And yeah, it takes 10 minutes and then he's like, oh, I've gotta slow down. Sorry, sorry. And then I'll do regular any fails. You usually don't fail on Zephyr.

Like you usually fail on other people, but not her for some reason. So like you're trying to help and you're not. And she's like, she's pulling these like soaked bandages off. Warren's is just like, damn it. Those are my hand wraps. Throws them down.

Throws it on your hand wraps. Gotta make eye contact with everyone else. It's like, what's happening? You know what? It's fine. I'll just sit here for a down. Throws it on your hand wraps. Try to make eye contact with everyone else. What's happening? You know what, it's fine. I'll just sit here for a second. No, it's fine. She's like, her hands shaking.

It's my fault I'm distracted. I'm sorry. It's fine. And man. And then just goes on and on. And there's a crit. So then he crits on the third attempt. And that is 21 points of healing.

30 minutes later. 30 minutes later, 21 points of healing. So 30 minutes later. 30 minutes later, 21 points of healing. So not full, but a lot better. I have a bit of a tension as well. Yes, come over here, Bones. I'll take care of you. He gets out his medical kit, and he's still,

you can see he's still hurt and bleeding. He's not taking care of himself. Maybe you should work on yourself. No, no, I'll get to myself. I'll get to myself. His blood is dripping down his hands. He's not gonna. No!. Maybe you should work on yourself. No, I'll get to myself. I'll get to myself. His blood is dripping down his hands. He's not gonna. I don't think I'm trying.

He's not gonna barge. I'm increasing the DC again. And he hits at that time. Phenomenal, okay. So this is the first time I've done this. So he increased the DC to 20. And since he takes the medic dedication, and that's a regular success,

now that healing is gonna be 2d8, which I just rolled max. Nice. Plus success. Now, that healing is gonna be 2d8, which I just rolled max ice, plus 15. Oh, wow. So it's 31 points of healing. I had seven hit, I was down seven hit points. I know, so that's so funny. I thought you were down more. No, I got heal, you healed me with the heal spell

and then Pasta's tickled my brain. I just thought you had more max HP. Pasta stands up. 38. From the water and walks over. I'm also hurt. Yeah, no, he's going around. Speaking of which, so we talked about this last episode about the level up.

I decided not to take Ward Medic, but the reason was because it is a skill feat. And I think I might take Ward Medic as a skill feat. Oh, okay, I see. As opposed to a general? Yeah, you can take it as a general, but instead I went with a general feat. And after what happened with the snail, when he came so close and he had that vision, I

decided to take toughness. So that when he came back, even though he's like a weaker guy, when he came back, he's a little bit tougher. He's hardened by that experience. And I think mechanically, like, I just need to try to stay up longer, right? For sure. Yeah. I mean, we've all got to be tough. Like we've all like, it's how comical it must be.

Like every 15 minutes, one of us like gets knocked unconscious and almost dies. Yeah. It's like a three stooges short. Yes. All right, Asta, that is 16 points of healing. Awesome. I'm back up.

Great. And Buggles, you didn't take any, right? No. All right, so as you guys plan, like, what's next, he just starts working on himself. So that's been 50 minutes so far. I wanted to show you guys something. This is from episode 32 of a show called The Glass Cannon Podcast. You guys just stepped through the portal to Castorville.

Just now. You guys just stepped through the portal to castor fell just just now I'm passing through humid air just face like a hot towel You look around and surrounding is just verdant Skid Mar you just got receded on air. Live on air. Oh, I don't need to take this. I don't need to take this.

I can't take this anymore. I need to take a break, Andy. I need to take a break, Andy. Rip off your lav. Just rip off your microphone. Well you know what? Sometimes you forget things too. I have never forgotten anything. You're not perfect. When's my birthday?

November. You know what that really does work when they do that on TV? October 30th. Deflect. With help. Yes. With help. I sit at the water's edge. The day before Linus's, that's when. I sit at the water's edge contemplating

all of the parties. That too. What do you do? I'm sitting at the water's edge contemplating everyone in the party's birthday, because Oster remembers it. Oh, do you? You're one of those people?

Brother Amias healed you up, right? Yeah, so you're good, and Brother Amias is good. He fixed himself in 10 minutes back to full. So it took one hour of us just kind of like patching up. And I have my conflict spell back because I had enough time to also get that back. To refocus. Yeah. Yeah.

All right. Have you ever seen any creatures like this before? You know, travels around the jungle. No, I just sensed it had a Just some daddy issues that we could exploit It's kind of how the personal weakness works. This is like. Oh, I I see they they I see they have a particular version to this thing Oh, you know seems like some subterranean beast. Yes Brother amy, it's my expertise is going to be limited. Can I do a little post combat recall knowledge? I want to use my scholarly recollection.

I just want to see if I can determine... Well, it's an alien world, so I'm never going to know what their habits are or anything. I just wanted to see if he could figure out any more about them, but yeah, I know where you're going to go with that. So it looks like I could probably pretty easily hop from the shore to the middle rock to the other shore. Are you still wounded or no? No, that went away with the healing. I'm not.

With the tree wounds, yeah. With the tree wounds, it went away. Okay. Right? Yeah, easy leap. Okay. Go leap leap. So I will leap onto the rock,

and if I have short footing, I'll roll a perception check onto the other shore before setting foot there. Okay, yeah, well only one person can stand on that rock, so you hop there and then roll a perception. 18. 18. Okay, so you look in there and

you can see it's like a long, looks like a long cavern that runs east-west, at least by the map here, and the walls of the natural stone have been carved into dozens of bas-relief statues. Many look like familiar-looking humanoids wearing robes or carrying books or staves. But others look maybe insectile under their hoods or reptilian, maybe rodential. A vest. And some completely unrecognizable. They said that there were some extra formian.

No, they said that there were also some formia Civilization All right, I will then leap to there wouldn't there wouldn't be Vesk well should so yeah We already mentioned they already mentioned the show, too. I don't think the best would be here at this point though Okay, you just mentioning going back to detecting magic particularly with the water in the pool any any residual magics Floating from any of this stuff. No Austin gets in the pool. Don't go too far. It's it's deep you start sinking Yeah, she just wants to jump in okay. You want to swim across okay?

Oh, yeah, you can't feel the bottom so you're just awesome swimming your way across everybody follow brother amias will leap and then, oh! Okay. I'll leap. Fine. Asta gets out, shakes her whole body like a dog, and her hair is once again like, poof! Super poof. Comically.

You all get into this room and immediately, poof! As you step in, and Barnes, you started feeling it as they were jumping across, you start to become overwhelmed with what at first feels like nostalgia, but then kind of devolves into memories of every single failure you've ever experienced in your life, every moment of shame, and it just starts to eat at you and eat at you and eat at you until you begin to buckle over in pain.

And we'll see you next week. Oh my God! Gross, not your feelings. Bury that shit. Just tap it down! Just ignore it. Just ignore it. It's all just me friends.

I have so many shameful things. Why are you looking at me? You fail too, don't you? It's time to make your membership official. Become an official member of the Naish today at JoinTheNaish.com. That's JoinTheNaish.com where you'll get access to exclusive podcasts and live streams you can't find anywhere else. See what everybody's talking about and join the nation today at join the nation.com