The Glass Cannon Podcast - Gatewalkers Episode 67 – Children vs. a Dresser God

Episode Date: January 10, 2025

Having rescued Sakuachi's sick companion, the heroes seek an antidote for her illness. Watch the video here: https://youtu.be/EkTVOYbQQ5E This episode was sponsored by Foundry VTT and Norse Foundry. See why tabletop gamers everywhere have made the switch to Foundry Virtual Tabletop at https://foundryvtt.com/gcp For all your random number-generating needs, visit Norse Foundry at https://www.norsefoundry.com/discount/newyearnewdice. For a limited time, save with code "newyearnewdice". Save your smile and your bank account with Remi! Get up to 50% off your custom-fit mouth guard at https://www.shopremi.com/GCN today! Access exclusive podcasts, ad-free episodes, and livestreams with a 30-day free trial with code "GCN30" at jointhenaish.com. For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. Watch new episodes when they premiere every Thursday at 8PM ET on youtube.com/theglasscannon. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You are listening to the Glass Cannon Network, the premier source for role-playing game entertainment. What's going on everybody? It's your old buddy Troy and I am here to talk about Glass Cannon Live 2025. In case you missed the news, Strange Aeons, the story that has been the focus of our tour since we began touring in 2018, is moving off the tour. We're gonna be playing that game online, long sessions once a month, marathon sessions, live on Twitch. And Glass Cannon Live is about to start a brand new adventure that I'm calling Ascension. Without giving too much away, this is going to be a story and world shaped in some way by the events of Giant Slayer, the story for the original Glass Cannon podcast.

And we are kicking off the tour in Texas. Good old Texas. We're coming to both Dallas and Austin. I think a lot of people are wondering like, well, should I get tickets to Dallas? The first show, is that gonna be a session zero? No! Dallas is going to be episode one.

The story is going to begin in Dallas and then continue the next night in Austin. This is a story and a show that I'm going to be working on constantly throughout the year, building it as we go based on the choices that the characters make. I am so excited about this. This is a project that I've kinda had in the back burner for a while,

that maybe I've been like, ah, I can't do it, it's too crazy, but we're doing it. It is going to be a spectacular jumping on point for new people who may be like, I can't listen to the 100th episode of a show. Well, you can listen to episode one or catch up really easily when we're on four or five and you only have a couple hours to listen to.

So if you have friends, you've been trying to get into the Glass Cannon podcast, the Glass Cannon Network for a while, what a great way to start. Bring them to this live show and they will get in on the ground floor just like you. So head to glasscannonetwork.com slash tour and you can buy tickets or VIP packages to any of the shows that we have coming up this year. The two that are on sale right now are Dallas and Austin. We're coming to Dallas on February 21st and Austin on February 22nd. But then get ready because tickets will be on sale soon for Milwaukee on March 21st,

St. Paul on March 22nd, Seattle on April 11th, Portland, Oregon on April 12th. That's my mom's birthday. Happy birthday, mom. Well, not yet. Ann Arbor on May 11th, Portland, Oregon on April 12th, that's my mom's birthday, happy birthday mom, well not yet, Ann Arbor on May 23rd, Toronto on May 24th, and then of course we're coming to Vegas in June for Glass Cannon Network retreat number two! That's not a Glass Cannon Live, but just a reminder that that's going on sale as well. Guys, I can't wait to share Ascension with you. Joe, Skid, Matthew, Kate, Sydney, and Sydney and I are all gonna be there and I hope you'll be there, too

Last week on the glass cannon podcast. It's just like hacking Well, he's like great as you know, like the voice in his head maybe too. Zephyr's like, get me out! Wood is splintering all over the scene. Standing on the table above you is a feminine figure dressed head to toe in Dark Souls armor of thorns. She looks so cool. Yeah. What the heck?

His arrows look so great. It's part for his part. The primary target takes 42 points of fire. And he's 10. Yeah. What the heck? Yeah. Boy's Narrows looks so great. It's Bar vs. Bar. The primary target takes 42 points of fire. And he's 10. Whoa! Amazing! Wow! And he can get all the way around and block her way out.

And she raises her glass. Yes! Do it! Daniki is still like lost in this drug-induced dream. What happened? What happened? Do you know who she is? She's fine. She just needs a little medicine. I feel like braving the apothecary shop in the middle of town.

Steal yourselves. Steal your minds. No, not what we find in here. No, open the door. Over in the far corner of the room as you're starting to look at the potions there, you see the cabinet start to shake a little bit and then the cabinet like lurches up, comes to life. The adventure continues... I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man, I'm gonna be a man,, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, This is the second episode of January. Now I know what you're thinking, Troy. Last week, we skipped a few people's New Year's resolutions. I guess we don't need to talk about it anymore, right? The New Year's over. No, not true. Most people by the second week of the year

have already given up their New Year's resolutions. The gym is packed on January 2nd, 3rd, 4th, and then the next week, you know, you just wait a week, empty again. So we didn't get to check in with three people last week about their New Year's resolutions. Let's start today with Sydney. Sydney, what is your New Year's resolution

besides finding a new group who doesn't mercilessly make fun of your character? You know what's funny? Same thing happens in my home group. You guys think it's me? There's one common denominator here. Oh, no. It's really fun to make fun of you. I know.

You go along with it so well. And at my age, my ripe age of 30 years old, I know that. And I kinda like it sometimes. So it's okay, guys. I mean, we do it because we love you. I know. We would have a very different tone

if we were trying to get rid of you or something. That's true. You guys would ignore me. And that would be way worse. Yeah. And it's like, yeah. The fact that you guys continue. It's just too fun.

I'm sorry. It's like, it's just really tempting and fun. Going to the heavy bag at the gym or something. My bullies felt the same way in middle school. And then they put me in a locker. Well, correct me if I'm wrong, but back in December when we had the Philly show, I met one of your friends and hung out, played a game with your fiance and everything.

And there was a bit of like, you won't believe what Sydney did in the game the other night. I'm like. Like, and I was just like, yeah. I know. I love, that's why I love. We all have these war stories of Sydney's antics around there. That's why I love playing games, because it's like you get to take chances, you get to try things out, try new characters, try new classes, and then your friends make fun of you.

That's the fun, that's the fun of it. You've got to pull yourself out there. Yeah. Discouraging you from taking any further chances. Yes. And yet, I still find a way. Do you have any years' res? You know, I And yet, I still find a way. Do you have a New Year's res? You know, I don't.

Could be gaming related. Could just be life related. Big year, you getting married? I am getting married this year. Very exciting. Is your New Year's resolution to go through with it? To get married. Not get divorced.

Not get divorced. Please stop at the end of 2025. No, I think, I don't know. I kind of want to get back into working out, but not in the way that's like, I'm going to go to the gym, I'm going to do-do-do-do. You want to get huge? I'm trying to get yoked. Swole.

Just absolutely swole. No, I'm trying to get steady in a practice of doing yoga in the morning, stretching at night. A little self-care. Yes. Very important. A little just like make a plan and stick to it. Like yes, it's hard to wake up early, but just wake up at six and do the workout and

then it's done. It's done for the day. Not for the day. So I just want to get back into that mindset of like, you're not going to die if you run three miles. You know, you're okay. And I think I need to just be more positive and kind to myself when trying to get back on that.

Because it's hard to start working out. You work out. If you take a break, I find it's very hard to like start again. Oh my, the herniated disc threw me off right into the holidays. It sucks. Yeah. It's tough. It's tough to start anything.

But you can't think about the whole big picture, right? Like, ah, I fucked up. My life's over. All you can do is moment to moment. Yeah. Day to day moment, day to day. Even day to day is too much. I have a fact that will help. So like when you work out and stuff,

especially like building muscle, like your body builds more capillaries to feed more blood to your muscle. So that's why sometimes if you take time off and then you start doing it again, it's a little bit, like there's a hump to get over, but it's not as big as when you first initially tried to build the muscle.

So there's that. So the muscle's there. It's just like a little sleepy. That's what my physical therapist said. Like if you were into it and then stopped and you get back, like it's easier to get it back than it is to like start from zero. But were you into it before? Were you like regular?

See, I go in and out. I'll get on like a every day, I'm doing this and that, and then life gets in the way. You know, you get a gig and you're like busy and then you come back and you're like, how did I have time for this before? Like, how did I make time? So I'm trying to make more time. Yeah. Just got to throw that tape in the VCR, the little tie bow.

Yep. Yep. Billy blanks. Billy blanks, got to hit play. Yeah. Put on my leotard and my, what is it? Leg warmers. Leg warmers, yeah.

Yeah. The Billy blanks method. Matthew, you're not a guy who likes anything. But. Ha ha ha! Famously does not like anything. No hater. His defining character trait is he doesn't like anything.

He has no legs. Well. Well, what I'm trying to say is you don't like special things. Like a birthmark. Ha ha ha! Is it just because of the numbers? You don't like special things, like a birthday. Is it just because of the numbers? It's like it's a birthday or a special occasion or like a New Year's Day. You're like, every day is New Year's.

It doesn't like extraneous commemoration. Yeah, that's a long one. Do you think that New Year's Day is extraneous commemoration? What? Hold on, sorry. I'm so sorry. I don't like things. Well, like, I think-

Do you like things? I think you're the type of person that's like, every day is New Year's Day. I'm always resolving to better myself. Right. I don't need January 1st in a new year to start cleaning. I'm pretty bad at planning my New Year's resolutions ahead of the new year. I'll say that. Okay.

But by January, I'm talking January rolls around, I'm like, oh, God, I should have thought of some things. Do pro tip. Take the month of January to figure it out. Yeah. And start my resolution. In February, this is your thing. I always forget.

Then you have a super short month in which to get tired of it. Because you wake up hungover on January 1st and you're going to start your diet. It's crazy talk. You take January to start laying the foundation. That's all you got to do. So what do you want to do? I don't know. I have nebulous resolutions.

I generally also wanna, I was doing, this year has been really up and down on my level of fitness attention. Where I was doing really well for a while, then I fell off and I got sick and there was this whole thing. So I wanna get back on that. I'm gonna look at your Peloton workout sketch. You know the worst part.

Oh, don't, it's embarrassing. I'm gonna share it online. I'm gonna split screenshots of it up. Go to Troylawalleymath. up. Go to Trilla Valley, mathatown.com. On the company. Well, I hadn't been doing Peloton because when I had the hernia,

I discovered it on the Peloton. So even though my doctor was like, get on the bike, I was like, well, that was where it was hurting. So I've been doing more running but then now it's winter. Yeah. See, that's a killer too.

Can't work out in the winter. Sure you can. I also wanna, here's a specific one, is that I wanna wake up earlier in the morning. You wake up pretty early. Not anymore. I thought you worked up at 5 a.m. to right. No, that was when I had the day job.

Okay, so what's the one time you wake up right now? When Mira wakes up. And I wanna wake up. What time does she wake up? Somewhere between 6 to 7. 10, 10, 30. 10, 10, 30. Gosh, that sounds so bad. She likes to sleep. Every time I hear about the tortures

of having teenagers in your house, I'm like, yeah, but they will sleep for a while in the morning. Oh, yeah. If you let them. If you let them, they'll just sleep. They'll sleep until 11 or 12. I wake up when Mira gets up, or sometimes a little after, if Kaelin gets up too.

So I want to, like, that's a good one. I want to wake up to get a little time before Mira's awake to kind of get the day organized. Oh, it is the best. Here's the thing. This is probably what happens. To be up and like, and conscious and doing even something stupid as like making lunches or getting some work done. Like before the kids are up.

Playing Indiana Jones in the great circle. Or playing Indiana Jones. Shaving your back. Before the kids are up. It's just so nice. A quick read. So nice. There's a little bit of a wish though,

and so she would, yeah, I've tried this in the past. I've resolved similar, I've resolved similar goals in the past and I would wake up, you know, 5.50 whatever, get up and like go to the computer and she would just wake up. I was like, I'm not being loud. It happens.

Yeah. She knows. She knows you're trying to get a moment for yourself. And then I just feel the fear. Like seismographs, they can just like sense the vibrations. Like when you. Yeah. So wake up earlier.

Wake up earlier. And get in shape. In shape. Okay. I am not. Hold up. Jeez. What?

There's more coming. Everybody hold on. Wait. Don't. It's okay. Everyone take cover. There we go. There's one more maybe.

It's gonna be okay. Just one more. Is that it? I'm going to swallow that third one. Don't do that. Inside of it. OK. It's inside. Sneeze is coming from inside. Oh, it went there. It went downstairs.

Kate! What about you, Kate? You got a New Year's rest you're working on? I was just saying that I am not trying to wake up earlier. Not that I wake up early. It's just like, that's not the life I want to live. I already work out pretty regularly. I don't need to do it more.

I could, but I don't want to. And I don't really have a resolution, but I thought of something I would like to do more this year sitting here. That's a resolution. It's not really a resolution, but it's a goal. And it's, you know, it's a mindset. I want to be complimented on smelling good a lot.

But you do smell so good. So I got a lot more like perfumes and stuff. So I just want to be like known as like Kate. She always smells really good. For that you have to be close to people. You have to get close to people. No, no. You have to let them hug you or touch you.

Not if you are a lot. If you want it to be really strong, if you want it to be really overdo it. But if you throw an elbow on live TV, you'll never have to do it again. So she can make the impression of one key influencer. I like that yours is specific enough where you're like, I want to smell so good from far away.

That I want to get compliments. Yeah, they yell at you across the road, are you wearing perfume? You smell amazing. It's that nice smell and we always know it at you across the road, are you wearing perfume? You smell amazing. It's that nice smell and we always know it's you. I mean, actually the work begins right now. Cindy just complimented you on this podcast. It's listened to by millions and millions of people.

I've already started sowing the seeds. I've seen corrected though, that is not a resolution. You're correct. Yes it is. Well, it's how I want to move forward in life. It's like, I think I wanna be a person that just like is known for smelling really good and having like fun scents.

And so that's going to be my fun little resolution. I like that. It's different. It's going to be hard. Never heard that one. No, it's not. I'm ready. I'm already halfway there.

There's this fine line, right? Like between being constantly complimented for how good you smell and it being too It's a really fine line. Matthew's already choking at your scent That's the goal this year is to find that trial and error if somebody's like Jesus in an elevator So listen, Sydney compliments me. Sydney compliments me. No, just an internal scent notebook. Troy and Matthew are both sneezing and coughing. Let me take this feedback. Yeah.

Have I ever told you guys about when I worked at a fragrance company? No. I worked in the IT department at a fragrance company, but as you might imagine, there wasn't a... What kind of IT stuff do you get? Like questions. I can't open the bottle. My computer smells terrible, help! Ah! Ah!

Ah! This is gonna, Ah! Ah! Ah! This is gonna date me, but I was helping them migrate to Windows XP. Oh my god. Oh my god.

You were that kind of IT, okay. God, tell us, tell us the whole thing, grandpa. As you might have, Sydney has no idea what you're talking about. I know what Windows XP is. You could be speaking Spanish. I know what Windows looks like. Windows has value.

Windows has value. As you might imagine, there weren't a lot of people with XY chromosomes working at the fragrance company. And but they need, there's a certain point where they need to smell the various variations on different formulae, formulae, formulas? I don't know, on real skin. So they would go around asking for volunteers to do tests.

So they would literally knock on the door of the IT office like, hey, can we borrow your skin? And then I was like, I don't know. I was like a summer hire. I was 21. So I was like, I don't know, I was like a summer hire. I was 21. So I was like, okay. So they would like- Let me hear an IT and say-

It's a weird way to ask. Is there a sound to it? That's a question that could go a lot of different ways depending on how it's asked. But I get why they're doing this. Can we borrow your skin? Right, once it reacts different to different peoples like oils and temperature and stuff like that.

So they, I would like roll up my sleeve, like up to my shoulder. Would they be like, oh my God! Like when they saw the hair on your arms? No, actually, I think they were like. We got a weed whacker. That was interesting. It's never going to reach the skin, Drew.

They would do the control on the wrist and then the various variables all the way around. Oh, it's like an allergy test. And they would sit there. And there would be a crowd of people around you. And they would just go like. Really? Weird. It was so strange. And one point we got to. And they were like there'd be a crowd of people around you and they would just go like really Weird it was so strange and

One point we got you ever ever have any skin reactions to particular ones no reactions But like then my like manigot my favorite one was when someone would be like all right They would spray a munch on then they would like someone come oh my god. That's putrid I'm like I have to wear this the rest of the day Before I feel like actually I have to wear this the rest of the day. I know. Oh my God. It'd be funny if they're like, actually we sprayed the other arm. Oh God. It's putrid. That's not a horrible stench.

Oh man, we didn't spray him yet. We haven't actually sprayed him yet. He's a natural musk. That's my musk. In those days I was really good at back going to the gym and sometimes I wouldn't have time to shower so I would be lifting and I'd get whiffs I was just disgusted. In those days I was really good at back-up in the gym and sometimes I wouldn't have time to shower. So I would be lifting and I'd get whiffs

of five different scents on my arm. That's the worst. People would be looking at me funny. You a cologne guy? Joe, I could picture you being an old-fashioned cologne guy. Oh, I was until maybe 10 or 15 years ago. Yeah, cologne, wake up, pop, pop.

That always is, you know, a little bit. Little, pssh, walk through it. None of you wear cologne? I used to, too. That'll waste a little bit, a little psh, walk through it. None of you work cologne? I used to, too. I used to get it as gifts a lot. I used to get like, is that, yeah, sure. That was an 80s gift. My grandfather was like a big like old spice guy.

So I still like the smell of this, just like old spice. My dad was Pierre Cardin. I don't know if he still used it or not, but like that scent to me. I had that. That smells like my dad. That's the cool thing about scents like that, is that it can sort of, you can be associated with a memory if you, you know.

This is what they talk about. At the Fragrance Company, is that the olfactory memory trigger is the strongest trigger. I smelled a scent yesterday, I think it's because I'm getting windows installed, so there's fresh wood scent, and there's something about that wood scent. Windows XP? Windows XP?

Yeah, I just looked, I was like, who's gonna make the joke? Why are you smelling it? Are we letting this go? I'm getting an English Windows install. It smells like wood. And there's something about that fresh pine scent that took me all the way back to being in preschool. Oh, yeah. Isn't that crazy?

And I was like, whoa. And I was there for a minute. Time travel, yeah. You smell it. Do you ever get a smell and you're like, this is a memory but I can't place it? Yes. Yeah, that happens. It's more of a feeling. And you're like, please last, please last, you smell. You ever get a smell and you're like, this is a memory, but I can't place it? Yes, yeah, that happens. It's more of a feeling.

And you're like, please last, please last, please last. I like to hear. Oh, there it goes. Oh, it's going to be. For nostalgia junkie like you. They use it, I'm sure you've done it in acting classes. They use it all the time, where you close your eyes and you go through sense memory through smell

to create memory and tie it to a character or a moment in a scene. So like happy, sad, whatever, because it is the strongest one, which is weird. But yeah. Yeah. Wow. Grandma's cookies.

And then you're like, hmm, happy. Grandmother never made me cookies. Yeah. Do you wanna talk about it? It's really sad. No. I don't think she knew how. That happens.

Not very good in the kitchen. What is your resolution? Oh yeah. Oh yeah. It is to take a quick break. That was easy. Millions of Americans grind or clench their teeth at night and most don't even know that they're doing it and I'm one of them. So you're in good company, but listen, we've got to protect our teeth. If you have jaw pain or headaches after a night's sleep, there's a good chance that you grind or clench your teeth.

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breaking the bank with Remy. And thank you Remy for sponsoring this episode. Folks, we're back. I want to thank our sponsors, Foundry Virtual Tabletop. We've seen them on full display as of late on this sick combat. And of course, Norse Foundry, who has been really showing up for the players lately, not so much the game master. Game master. Game master.

I told you about the new year new dice. It's still through the weekend, through this weekend. You can still get it. And I feel like for us, it's been a new year new dice. Where we're rolling better, you're rolling worse. It's been nice. What's the promotion? Pretty good.

What's that? What's the promotion again? New year new dice is a code you use to check out for a discount. I don't know what the discount is right now, but check it out. Two weeks ago... There's a link in the description of our episode. I gave you bottle caps. I gave you all bottle caps.

One of them has been used. They really haven't made a huge difference. It's just you've been rolling pretty well. I've been rolling poorly. Haven't needed them. It swung this way. I got nervous for that combat, but then once I thought about it, I'm like, this is like five enemies. It's not going to be like the cat.

It's going to be a little more balanced. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I had a couple cool things that just didn't pop. Yeah. But I was saying to Joe before we started, it's like you got to the part where you were like role

playing with them, and I was just really tired. I was like, I don't know where they're from. Just leave me alone. I don't know what my name is. I'm just asking. It's like, I'm a downer. It doesn't matter. It doesn't fucking matter.

It doesn't matter. Who cares? The guy said, it doesn't matter where I'm from. Why do you want to know? It doesn't matter where I'm from. It's a totally normal reaction as a GM to be like, every once in a while to be like, just leave me alone. I was just so- The players are on you for something.

Just didn't want to role play. Can we just move on? Move on. Just go to the apothecary. Just go across the street. In a way, that is great role playing. Some people don't want to chit chat. That's right.

That's true. But man, do you smell nice? You should have said to the elf. Do elves smell nice? I would imagine. I imagine they all, yeah, have a natural odor. The best ancestry for scents. Better than a leshy.

Yeah. I think. Worst? Dwarfs. Yep. That is racist. Maybe. No, I think they stink.

They stink? They work hard a lot in incredibly humid conditions. Maybe the scents that they do like if they wear them are like strong. Not like nice, fancy, or floral. They're also lower to the ground. They're lower to the ground, so the stench. they do like if they wear them are like strong. Not like nice, fancy or floral. They're lower to the ground so the stench. I'm making a cannon that a lot of gnomes smell like sandalwood and like leather and stuff

because they're like tinkerers a lot of the time. I think Gic probably smells like, I don't know, sandalwood, like the wood made from a violin or something. A very masculine scent. Yeah. I think my armpits smell like that right now. I think all of our characters don't smell good right now. No, we have not showered any of us once.

No one has rolled play showering. And we've also been- Father did. We also went on a tour of- That's right, he's the only character. I ran out of soap. Bath time. Oh, sorry, bath time. He didn't shout out about showering. Bath time, bath time. He didn't shite out about showering.

Bath time. Bath time. Sorry. Whoa. I missed it. He's just rubbing weeds and dirt on his naked skin. He's just pretending to shower like this. He was just rubbing the dirt on his nude body.

And then he went, I ran out of soap. I forgot that. Oh, that poor guy. I kind of miss him. We got to get back to Father. We got to get back. Maybe you'll see old Father, should you make it out of this sticky wicket, because in talking to the elf and her companion, one of the best raiders that came to Skywatch to kind of pick this place clean, you find out that they met Deniji and thought that maybe this was another raider and they didn't want to share their spoils.

So they poisoned her and just threw her in the back here. But because they're having trouble navigating Skywatch, they're kind of stuck here. They keep trying to leave during the day, not understanding that it's actually easier at night when there are stars. And so they keep getting turned around and ending up back here. Though they have seen or heard of the hobgoblins, they left them alone. At this point, they feel like they've gotten their fill and they want to get out. They do say there is a potion shop, an apothecary store in the middle of this market.

Any antidote you can find in there will work to remove this – what was it called? Dreamtime tea? Yeah. Sleepy time tea. Sleepy time tea. It's like a souped up version of it because they really – they didn't want to kill her. They just wanted to like take her out of the action.

But they said, we're not going in there. That place is haunted. We tried walking in there and the wall started shaking. So you go in or I should say Barnes goes in. You look through the windows. Everything looks normal. It's a very tiny room. How could an enemy even fit in there?

Maybe it is haunted. Brother Ramius does like a lore, recall knowledge. Like if you heard of haunts and you realize what you've experienced so far is magical disturbance, not so much haunts, not so much like divine, undead situations. You come in here and sure enough, one of the cabinets comes to life. It's like legs of the cabinet are the legs of this creature. It comes lurching at Barnes' Roll 4 Initiative. Let's get into it.

Roll, ricker, roll, ricker, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, roll, We're gonna make a roll for initiative. This roll for initiative brought to you by Norse Foundry. Norse Foundry. Are your random nom generating needs. That's all your ol' factory needs. Ha ha. They're smelling nice in the industry.

And they smell great too. All right, so I still don't have new art for Gic because, kinda waiting this out to see if you last. Ah. Before I. We don't wanna invest in that illustration. We don't want to invest in that illustration. We don't want to invest in an illustration just yet. She's here to stay.

Where did you get the art that we are using? Where is that from? That is like from the Pathfinder character shit. NPC Codex kind of thing? Yeah, yeah, they came up with a new one. It's a cool looking gnome. Andrew from Norse Foundry was like, yo, I just gave youx kind of thing. Yeah. Yeah, they came up with a new one and a cool-looking gnome Yeah, no, no, no, no, no Andrew from Norse Foundry was like, yo I just gave you all these characters you can use so I was like no perfect But someone is not what I say Norse Foundry the Andrew from Foundry VGC. Thank you regular foundry Somebody foundries. All right. So wait, someone is not in my initiative trackers

Who was the least important person to me? I got Buggles kill those parts Sorry points our frontline Barnes. Sorry, Barnes. Our frontline fighter? Yikes. May add you to the initiative trail. The only one who's actually involved in the situation right now. I know.

All right, Buggles, what did you get? I got a 12. 12, okay. Okay, that is a 12. Barnes, what do you three? 23. Very good. Gik Muck.

14. 14. Two more EPs. We'll-Mak. 14. 15. Two more EPs. We'll start talking to an artist. Okay. Brother Ramious. Damn. 23.

23. And Zephyr. 25. Ooh. Oh yeah. Oh, five alive. Well, of course the Apothecaries cabinet rolled higher than all of you.

Of course. I forgot it's a cabinet attacking us. Yes you want to see what it looks like? Yeah. Yeah. All right because it has artwork. Here's what it looks like when it comes to life. Oh I love it. Oh my god. I can't fight that. It's like the luggage from the Terry Pratchett books. Maybe if I had like teeth or something so cute There's no way that things dangerous And I feel like that's what plays here anyways, it's its turn and it's cute, but nasty so Barnes is the only one in the room a drawer opens up and a Bottle just comes flying at you.

Oh my. Really fun mechanic here. Let's see if I hit. That is going to be a 27 to hit. That hits. Let's have some fun, huh? So, oh god, this is so fun. Is this like a random?

It's a random poison substance. Oh, no. That does sound fun. It does sound fun. I thought it was going to be a random spell. I got to roll to see what kind of poison splashes on the struck creature This is a noxious poison so I feel like foot powder potentially or something could be yeah You start smelling nice all right, so give me a fortitude save all right

19 Okay, so a couple things are gonna happen. First of all, you're going to take some damage to the tune of nine points of bludgeoning damage as this glass explodes on you. Boom! And then a 19 is a failure. You now take another nine points of poison damage.

Oh boy. And you are sickened until the end of your next turn. Oh no. Oh boy. That is its first action and you're in there. I think it's just gonna be like, just start flinging poisons at you. So second attack, another poison.

That's a really good roll. 25 to hit. Yes. Okay. I'm sickened, sick and some AC starts to tick down. Yeah. Oh, man. All right, so first of all, you're going to take seven points of bludgeoning damage.

This camera just threw two glass bottles in my face. This is rude. But it is. It is rude. Now give me another Fortitude save. If you just fail again, you're just going to take some damage. I'm not going to make you sick in two.

24. 24. 24, all right, so that is success. You're gonna take another six points of poison damage. I am well below half. Oh boy. Okay. How much was that total? That was 31 points of damage.

Whoa. Oh my gosh. Okay. Nasty, and then. Not good. Oh man, it'll be fun. No, no. No another one I Was thinking about just standing in front of the door Like blocking my god, you'd have to jump out the window. That's what it's gonna do

It's just gonna stand there and it's gonna move down come. It's a large creature completely. It's huge. Yeah completely blocking the entrance and Large it is a blocking the entrance. That's how big it is? Large? It is a large capital L creature so it moves down, blocks anyone else from getting into the room. It is 10 feet away from Barnes and it's Zephyr's turn. So it's large you say. Oh interesting. How would you go about grappling with a cat? Well the fact that's on the other side of a medium-sized door jam is going to make it pretty tricky. We've all built Ikea furniture. We've all grappled large things. I feel like you can...

I'm just wondering if I... We've all had to move cabinets out of tiny apartments. I'm just wondering if I were to like try to grapple it or like restrain it in that way would it prevent it from spewing? It would just take the grappled condition which would give it certain penalties for trying to do such things. I feel like it probably couldn't throw potions as easily though. It's possible, it's possible. Let's just look at the grappled condition. But at this point I think in order for you to even try and do that you could like find

another way into the building to try and really get at it. If you crit succeed on the grapple, then it can't do anything until it uses the escape action. Otherwise, you know, certain. All right. She runs up to it. Flurry of blows. I'm going to start punching the cabinet. Okay. Maybe flavor.

It's like she's more so like, I don't know, trying to tear off certain hinges. I don't know. It's like tearing drawers out. 21 for the first one. Miss. That's crazy, it's so big. What?

What? What? Yeah, miss for the second one. So yeah, she's not sure how to attack it. So she's... Would it be an issue if I was in the way right here for anyone? Not that I know of.

That's, I can get around it. That's fine. Okay. And I can't try to grapple it from the doorway. I have to like move in. I think, yeah, in order to get a real good grapple, I was tempted to even give it a boost to its AC to hit but I'm saying it's a big creature just blocking the door you're punching it where you can see so I'm not gonna give it a boost. For now she's going to take a step back

and take cover because she saw Barnes get lit up. Yeah she doesn't want any piece of that. And she can't grapple this turn. So. You, did you consider tumbling through? Like as an action you can use. I don't want to just be in that room when it's its turn. Yep. Yeah. I didn't know if you just wanted to get in there by any means necessary. Yeah, not when it's going to go.

All right, it's excellent. Let's keep pushing here. It is Barnes's turn. I'm going to roll exploit vulnerability just to figure out what this is. So this is gonna be a Esoteric Lore, which is actually specifically for creatures and haunts. I don't know if this is either. Okay. Okay, that's a terrible roll. Natural 7.

For an 18. 18? No. No. Failure means something here. It would be failure, not critical failure. Okay, great. So I can only do its personal antithesis. Natural seven was close to a critical failure.

Wait, yeah. It's a single enemy. Yeah, so it's minimum two to three levels higher than this. Okay. All right. Usually pretty higher than this. Okay. All right. Usually pretty bad for this particular crew. Barnes is gonna glint the mirror and another Barnes is going to appear out the window.

There you go. Okay. And then that Barnes is the one that's gonna move. The one in the house disappears. I'll come around the corner. That's so cool. I just saw your palm pop out of nowhere. I'll come around the corner and be like, you don't wanna go in there.

Don't go in there. Okay, great. And now it's Ramius's turn. I mean, this thing can't even get out the door. Yeah, it's too big, I guess. We'll just walk away, let her die. We could just hit it ranged. Sorry, Takamachi, we never found her. Fucked up in there. Let's hit it from range, I guess we'll just walk away. Good throw her die. Yeah, we could just Watch you we never found her

Let's hit it from range. I'll get my show Dark Souls things are really just like stay far away Yeah Okay See if we can cheese it I Don't know if Troy's gonna bust through the door here It could yeah, it could cool aid man through the door if it's gonna bust through the door here. It could, yeah, it could Kool-Aid Man through the door. If a Kool-Aid Man's through the door,

that could be a problem for- Oh yeah! Oh yeah! It's like, it helps. Oh god! Oh god! I knew a guy who had worked at the ad agency with a guy who had come up with the Kool-Aid Man,

and we were all like, so did, people just walk into his office all the time and just be like, crash! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! He was like, so did, people just like walk into his office all the time and just be like, crash, oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. He was like, yeah. Ramius is gonna see this thing come up to the door, sees Barnes come around the outside, he's hurt, thinks about healing Barnes,

but instead is gonna try to focus on hurting this creature, see if we can can't whittle it down a little bit. So he will. Oh, you're no longer sick and by the way it was just the end of your next okay which the way it worked out was actually this turn I'm gonna do it delay he's gonna delay kick muck he wants to go after kick muck kick muck kick muck kick muck kick muck what is kick gonna do What is Gic gonna do? Gic, Gic, Gicma, Gicma, Gicma, Gicma, Gicma

Hey, hey, hey! Uh, Gixie's Barnes run around the corner. Barnes looks messed up. Messed up. Um, she turns, she goes, Are you okay? I've been poisoned. What?

Twice. Um... Twice. By a cabinet. And, uh... That just draws. You're not making any sense. She double, double what?

What, what? Uh, alright, so she is going to then do her Hymn of Healing. You're not making any sense. She double, double what? What, what? All right, so she is going to then do her Hymn of Healing. And to action Jon, use, wow, two focus points to him. Well, two focus points. And she's gonna say, Mm, mm, mm, mm, mm. And you just feel like, like a mother singing you a lullaby when you were a child.

You just feel like you're safe. There are no monsters under the bed. There's nothing in the closet. You feel warm. You feel cozy. The bed and the closet are monsters. Yeah, that's a bit... She says, don't think about the furniture. There's no monster in the closet, Barrence.

The closet is the closet is I Feel so much better and you the glorious singing men's wounds it provides temporary respite from harm so you gain fast healing for and I Can sustain it each time I do you gain for temporary hit points so you gain for temporary hit points this round okay? Oh, okay, thank you attract. Thank you. Make sure to track those separately. And she's going to back up a little bit and get behind Remus so she can see the doorway.

And that's the turn. Backing up behind Ramu. Buggles. I'll go. Okay. Brother Remus will cast Bless. Pwaa. And then he'll back up. And then he'll back up. Then he'll back up.

Put a little light in here. Okay. Now it's Buggle's turn. I was gonna say, speaking of the Kool-Aid guy, I took voice lessons once from a guy who claimed to be the voice of the owl in the How Many Licks Does It Take to Get to the Center of the owl in the how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop commercial?

A two, a three. It wasn't true, but no one knew it at the time. It was pre-internet, but he had set up this whole sort of practice in Denver. It's telling people that this is who he was and a bunch of people, like Nick Shelton, we both took voice lessons from this guy. It's like-

Was he good? It's hard to say. I don't know. How much work have I gotten? Like none. Fascinating. Yeah, Dick Terry. He's probably dead now.

All around. All right, so. And it was Paul Freeze, by the way. Like the great Paul Freeze, I think, was like the voice. The actual voice. Yeah, the actual voice. Also the voice of the Haunted Mansion.

Ah! Uh, okay, Stolen Valor. Buggles is going to step back and in front of Gikmuk, and he is going to hand fingers to his temple. Boom, frostbite. Please give me, and I'm going to do, yeah, I'm, boom, frost bites. Please give me, and I'm gonna do, yeah, I'm gonna do frost damage. So please give me a fortitude save.

Okay, frost damage, fortitude save is a 32. Okay, that's a critical success, no damage. No damage, boom, tries to frost this thing. We go to the top of round two. It is the Apothecary Cabinet's turn. Sydney, did you heighten him a feeling? Boop, boop, boop, boop. Is that your thinking noise?

Didn't you say it's a focus spell? Yeah. So it automatically happens. Yeah, it automatically happens. Oh, so you should heighten plus one the fast healing temporary hit points, increase by two, yes. So it should be four and four because it's heightened.

Didn't I say four? Yes, but the spell itself says two, so I'm just kind of playing. Yeah, okay. Yes, four temp HP and four gains fast healing four. All right, let me see if I can customize that. Thank you. All right, with Bugles in the front there, its targets are pretty slim. So this is coming at Buggles here.

A poison bottle comes flying at you. 21 to hit. That's a hit to me. All right. First things first, you're going to take 10 points of bludgeoning damage and let's see what hits you. Something a little bit different. Give me a Fortitude save.

Oh, okay. Fortitude save you questions? Oh. Uh, I'll be able to give you an answer. Total of that in just a few moments. Oh no. Right after this quick break. Still mad at that fucking guy, man.

Thinking about him. Told us he was in the fucking commercial. I love that commercial. Dick Terry. I told my whole fam, I told all my friends, like, you'll never believe I'm taking voice lessons from. Fucking asshole. 20 years later, they were like, Skid, lie.

Yeah, now I'm a liar. Our friends are liars. Now I'm a liar. Turned me into a liar. What was the fortitude, say? Yeah. 24. 24, that's a success.

Nice. So all you're going to do is take five points of poison damage. No affliction. Oh great. Wait, wait. What was the damage, the physical damage? 10. So it'll be 15 total. Yep. It is Paul Winchell who plays the owl. Paul Freeze. Paul Freeze is in it. He's the fox. He's the fox. One, two, hoo. A three. A three. All right, let's get down to business here. That was its first action. For its second action, it is going to hurl another one at Buggles.

Unfortunately, you guys pushed Buggles right to the front there, and that is going to be a miss, thankfully, for its third action. Shatters on the ground. For its third action, it goes back up to the corner there out of all of your lines of sight so maybe Zephyr could get something off there Zephyr does seem like she can see it I might give it some cover there which isn't really gonna help oh fuck oh shit

get them no I have something I forgot that I have this but if it if the situation doesn't change radically till my next turn, I have something cool I can do. All right, we'll see what Zephyr does. Zephyr? All right. Zephyr goes into the room. Okay.

Oh, I have to go around the door. And she attempts to grapple the cabinet. Yes. Okay. With her new Titan wrestler feet. All right, do you become, do you do your thing? Nothing happens to her. It doesn't say like flavor-wise like, oh, she grows.

It's like a regular feet. It's not part of this adventure path. And it just means that I can do certain things like grapple to creatures up to two sizes larger than me. Okay. All right, so. So athletic check against your fortitude DC. Against my fort.

Which I'm pretty sure a cabinet is fortitudinous. Well, let's just try. It's quite high. It's already been shown. If you're old enough for 20, it's not even a discussion. Let's just try. Alright, athletic. Worst case scenario, you're left alone in there. I got one more move.

It's true. Nope. It's gonna be an 11. Okay, well now, critical failure in a grapple. I think something happened. If it's already grabbed or restrained, it breaks free or your target can grab you. I don't think you can do that. Well, critical failure. If you already have the target grabbed, your target can either grab you as if it succeeded at using the grapple action against you or force you to fall and land prone What was the total roll?

um with bless Or is that you walked out of the bless? Okay, 11 just just a failure Hold on. Let me double check actually No, I'll see you're in bless well. I think that's technically 15 feet away 12 still a critical I'll say you're in bless. 12. I think that's technically 15 feet away. 12.

Still a critical, fuck. All right, so I can either grab you as if it's easy to use the grapple action or force you to fall and land pro. Oh God. I think that's what it's gonna do. It's gonna like, you go to land it, like pulls itself back and you lose your footing

and fall prone. Horrible. All right, I'm not gonna use my bottle cap to reroll that. I was just thinking about it. I'm like, should I just reroll because it was it was a natural to um All right, so she falls and with her final action Can I crawl? Can I crawl out of there Since I'm prone I'm like I can't like I went into that house

Since I'm prone, I'm like, I can't. You went into that house all tough. I just wanted to try something new. So much change. You can crawl if you're prone. Your speed is at least 10 feet. You move five feet by crawling. You continue to stay prone. That would provoke if it has an AOO,

but you could slide in there all heroically, fall over, and just go crawling out if you want. She falls over, and as she falls over, she tries to stumble, crawl out down the stairs so I can move five feet, you said. Yep, you probably see her crawl out. Each going into the house. You see her walk in and just jump at it.

Yeah. But it's out of her feudal vision because it's behind the wall. You just hear like, oh, oh, oh. And she comes back out, rolls down the stairs. We're all watching. In my mind, you look like Buddy the elf going, like jumping on the Christmas tree.

Yes. Yeah. Like, whoa, boom. This is bad. Like how'd it go in there? I was just trying to get to you guys. Uh. Okay. It is Barnes's turn.

Yeah. It is. Yeah. Yeah. can I see I can see this square right I can say based on the I can see some of it what square you looking for this this square yeah you can see this yeah you can see part of it right inside the door another Barnes appears in that square okay where are you you're okay she boink God whoever invented this wait had another Ramirez anything but that okay and Barnes will take a

swing okay now t17 ice I'm no longer sickened am I blessed here in that square? Yep. So that's gonna be a 28 to hit. That is a hit. Hi-za! Okay. We did it. We did it! We hit the cabinet. The cabinet.

We hit the furniture. We hit the giant piece of furniture. The sentient cabinet. 18 points of damage. Okay, you do notice not all of that goes through. That's hotness. We should light it on fire. Yeah, it's hardness, that goes through. I Hotness we should light it on fire hardness. That's in yeah, that's interesting so hot

Is there any kind of damage that would get through? Cuz that would well you failed your thing right I still get You just get the personal antithesis right yeah Just weakness against weakness against your unarmed weapon strikes so just is more damage yeah so nothing's nothing special okay and then the barns outside will take a five foot step I guess to the south closer to Zephyr and the barns inside will disappear inside barns goes away and outside barns moves closer to Zephyr. Standing right under that little lamp.

That's fun. The map, isn't that fun? Oh, look at that. Look at that, finally a bunch of tabletop. Ehh. All right, that was Barnes' kick-mock. Um, all right, I have... Well, first of all, I'm going to spend one action to sustain the fast healing.

So remember to add four back on this round. Four hit points. Sustain. I heal four, or I get four temporary HP? the fast healing, so remember to add four back on this round, four hit points. Sustain. I heal four or I get four temporary HP? You have four temporary HP, which is sustained now, and you also earn four normal HP every round. So you should have gotten.

Oh, so four again. I keep going. You get that back at the beginning of your turn. That's how fast HP works. Cool. So I'm sustaining. Oh, so I should have healed four on the last turn. Unless you pre-heal. Did you heal for the first time she cast it. No, nice. So you haven't taken any yet

Yeah, right. So you take four now take part in the beginning and then annual take four to start your next turn Yeah, yeah, and I have some tip for temporary HP to Buffet me yeah Slow but Warren buff at you. Um, it's slow, but it's fast. Technically. It's fast I mean every six seconds getting back a tent, you know Little less than a tenth of your health doesn't hurt. I keep you like I Wanted in there get I only have My highest level is second level right now for spells, but I do have to spell magic

Is it even worth it now to do a counteract on this now it's too powerful well I think that what it's doing is not magical it seems like a magical creature it's a magical creature like I don't think somebody is doing has to spell on it but we don't know I know all right so much I so much of my stuff is like talking to something. So I can't talk to him. Do you have non-somatic stuff or no? I do. I'm going to do a telekinetic projectile. So that was my first action. Second action, I'm going to pick up a stone from outside.

And I'm just going to hurl it at the cabinet through the doorway. All right, you're going to have to move up to be below Zephyr to have line of sight on it, because it's tucked up there in the corner. Oh, I see below Zephyr to have line of sight on it because it's tucked up there in The corner. Oh, I see below Zephyr. Okay. So yeah. Oh Do you have enough action? You need to pick up a rock to do that You can use telekinect projectile to fling something in the room at it. That's two actions. Yeah. Yeah Oh, yeah. Yeah, sir. Yeah. No, I can't do that then let me

Let me just let me just, let me just... The thing can only, if you can stay out of its sight, I can keep popping in to pepper it with a hit. And if you guys can hit it from range and then get out of its, like move, shoot, move again, so it can't throw something at you, we could feasibly just not take anywhere down. If we stay out of the doorway,

Zephyr could get a clean line with her bow So just I think if you want as a general rule, I think none of us should end our term where it can see us Okay. Well, there's just not much I can do then because I have to be able to see it to do anything on this turn So I'll just end my turn Now you can give you move out of the way and yeah move out of its sight Yeah, I'll give guidance to, I'll give it to Barnes. I'll continue that and then.

Bless is still going. But guidance is not. It's good, it'll help your saving throws. It'll help my saving throws. Yeah, if it throws in. Hit with the model again. Yeah, I mean, do you want that? I'm sure, it's not gonna be able to see me

unless it moves. It can see me. I'll give it to Zephyr. Because I'm laying there. I'll give it to Zephyr, yep. Oh yeah, you're prone. Oh yeah, you're prone. Thank you, yeah. I got a lot of it to Zephyr. Yes, I'm laying. I'll give it to Zephyr. Yep. So yeah, you're prone. Oh, yeah Yeah, I got a lot of stuff to do next. Oh, yeah. I definitely give you guidance then

Yeah, that's the turn. Okay, that's the turn brother Ramias. Ramias will expand the range of bless So, what is it now? Now it's 25 feet So that'll pour into the room. But yeah, it's getting out of its range is just not helpful to people that need to be healed. All right, I'll just try to, I'm going to try to shoot it. I'm just going to try to shoot it. I'm just gonna try to shoot it.

Barnes is slowly healing and he seems to have a way to dip in and out without being targeted. You can see less than half of it so I'm gonna give it some cover. Unless you want to move to a more advantageous position. I can't. Without just doing nothing. So yeah, I'm gonna risk, I'll risk it. I'll risk the miss and I'll risk it. Tough shot, tough angle shot. Biscuit for the biscuit.

Biscuit for the biscuit. Miss. And that's his turn. Your glass shatter in the back of the room. It's a 17. It was the one antidote. Yep. Close up on the label.

Dun, dun. Dun. Dun. Dun. It says doat. It's a doat. Doat. Doat. No, the doat. Back to Buggles.

All right, Buggles is going to like sort of put his little goblin hands out to the side. Let's like lift them up. And all of a sudden in the middle of the room of this place, like bottles and bits of wood and everything starts swirling around battering this chest as he casts animated assault in a 10 foot square in the middle of the room. Oh, cool. Centered on that little square nexus there. Okay.

So it's gonna need a reflex save. A reflex save. How about the reflexes on this cab? All right, that is gonna be a really bad roll. 15. Wow, he failed a roll! That is amazing. That is a fail that's 18 points of bludgeoning damage.

Nice! Phenomenal. Okay, same thing as Barnes, you notice not all that goes through, but you're chip, chip, chipping away at this thing. Right? Yeah. It's gotta chip and stay out of its sight. And yeah, and then I'm just gonna...

I'm gonna raise my shield. Sting! Uh, okay, that's Buggles. That's the end of round two. We go to the top of round three! That's the cabinet's turn. What does it have up its sleeve? Find out right after this quick rag.

What it has up its sleeve is potions for Zephyr's face! It's gonna move back. I believe it's like skincare or something. Yeah right, here comes a little Aveeno moisturizer. You're dry! Alright, it is going to move in the middle of the room and then throw two potions at you. Let's start with the first potion. That is gonna be a natural 10. 24 to hit.

Yeah, that hits. Give me a fortitude save. Fortitude save and I get a plus one because. Get the guidance if you want. Guidance. Guidance. Guidance. Guidance.

Guidance. Guidance. Sorry, this number's really big. 29. 29, that number's really big. 29. 29, that is a success. Nice. All right, so you're gonna take seven points of bludgeoning and then another one point of poison.

Not bad at all. Gentlemen's eight total damage. And then the second bottle, just again, like a drawer opens up, a bottle comes flying out at you. Okay, not too bad, not too good, but not too bad that is a dirty 20. Miss. Nice. Nice.

They're like, hold their hands up and block it. Prone? Prone. I'm prone. Negative two? Just means you're off guard, right? Prone, you're off guard. Or AC, so it's negative two. What'd you say? Twine. It's hit.

Damn. Oh, shit. Hit. Afforditude's safe say? Twine. Damn it. Oh god. Hit. That's crap. Oh, that's crap. Do I still have guidance? Oh! Did you use it on the last one? I did.

Oh, then no. I'm just trying to soft cheat. I think you should. Trying to soft cheat. I think you should. Personally, I think you should. I may have committed a bit of light cheating. A bit of light cheating.

Cute cheeky cheat. 21. A couple things are gonna happen. Okay. Alright, first of all you're gonna take 14 points of bludgeoning damage. Damn. Then you get hit by a clouded mind poison. You are stupefied one until the end of your next turn.

Wait, is this? Which shouldn't really affect you. This isn't like auditory or visual effects. No. Okay. Thank you. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr This isn't like auditory or visual effects. No. Okay. Thank you. And you're also going to take another five points of poison damage.

That second potion was no joke. Yup, that one really popped. And that's the end of its turn because it moved into a position to be able to even throw those. Now it's Zephyr's turn. Zephyr, you're standing right at the door. What do you do? Um, she gets up. So stupefied I was just double checking. It's not stupefied that lowers your actions. No it's not gonna hurt you that much. Yeah for you it's spell casting. And you're well saved I believe.

And she moves really far away. Okay show me. Maybe. Show me on the map where you move maybe shna I would like to move so that I'm like 30 feet Away from it, so let me just kind of like measure. Yeah, you're okay. Yeah And I'm not gonna take my bow out right now But I am going to do a harmonized self a quick harmonized self to get myself eight hit points back, okay And you have the focus points available to do that? Yep. You didn't burn them in the first fight? I did, but it's, you refocus. Oh, you refocus, got those back.

10 minute active. Okay, sweet. Great, good turn. Oh god. Barnes. Okay, Barnes is gonna glint the mirror and another Barnes will appear right in the room again. It's a grind, huh?

A little bit of a grind, but you're playing it safe as opposed to being bold and interesting. Okay. I tried to grapple it. Yeah, she would try to wrestle the thing very bold I don't know if I can see that square, so I'm gonna put myself right here, but I can still attack Okay, and I'll take a swing with the kukri Fumble and fall it's not fumble 19 to hit 19 miss okay Bar the outside Barnes will then move around the corner to stand at the window.

Oh. Yeah. Okay, so around the southern corner? Yep. Okay. And then the barns inside will disappear. Chik-oink. See ya, barns.

Chik-oink. Now I can see what it's up to and I can jump where I need to. Get and run tactics from barns. Gick mock. and jump where I need to. Get and run tactics from Barnes. Gic Mock. Gic, one action continues the healing hymn, so four more points will be added to you. I healed on my turn, I forgot that. So yep, you'll heal again.

And then I'm going to, you hear in your mind. Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. Like, Gic's not even talking to you, you just hear like this hy him in the background, background noise, white noise. And then you also hear in your mind the same sound happening. And I'm going to two actions soothe you. You regain 1d10 plus four, do you want to roll it or I'll roll it?

You can roll it. Okay. And you also get plus two status bonus to save against mental effects. Cool. If that comes up, it might not. You're gonna get 11 hit points back. Nice. And then the plus two status bonus to mental effects is like one round?

For the duration, so one minute. Okay, cool. And that's Giggs' turn. A minute, a minute, I keep holding on. Ramius. Ramius will just keep trying to shoot this thing. Okay, from that disadvantageous position? I don't know what you're talking about.

Oh, no, no, you got a nice, clean, juicy shot there. I'm wondering if I can hit it. Let's see if I can hit it first. So, divine lance! You're telling me there's a chance. 25. Hit. Yeah!

Now the question is, does spirit damage bypass hardness? I bet it does. I bet it does. Oh! Ooh! Oh! Oh! 11 points. Right?

No. Yeah, 11 points of spirit damage. Fwah! Doesn't affect the creature. Oh, it has no spirit. What? Oh. It is immune to spirit.

Hoopy caca. Hommage. Okay, good to know. So I've been effectively nullified for the combat. Does spirit damage, I forget what you did. Udyr. Remastered 2. Does spirit damage, is that the positive of void damage?

No. That's vitality. Spirit encompasses anything that is a soul. That's no moral compass. Is my understanding. This cat has no moral compass. Yeah. It must die.

Would you be opposed to moving for when Zephyr shoots? Yeah, I'm gonna get out of the way. He'll move down to the south, down near Barnes. He's out of line of sight of the creature. Yeah, I'll just stay down here. Yes, yes, yes, we do. And, yeah, Delay. Good spirit.

And we're in combat. How about you buckles Bugles gonna spend an action Sustaining the spell okay. Yeah assaults. I keeps going yeah I keep sustaining it yeah, and it's like right in the middle of the room And it's like it's too big to get out of its radius. Yeah, it's amazing I roll reflex reflex They please perfect no not all right 20 dirty 20 Okay, that is, that's a success. And I rolled badly. So it'd be, this probably won't get through the DR. So it's 20, uh, two points damage. Two points damage, sure enough. It does not

just buffets against it. Doesn't damage it. Okay. And then, all right. and then I'm going to do a fiery frostbite spell. Fiery frostbite? So from outside zoom, globe of cinders closes around it, snaps shut, give me a fortitude save. Fortitude save, not great, not great, but he does have pretty good for it, so it's gonna be a 23 okay That is a success So that is That is five points of fire damage, okay Might have a weakness yeah, so I'm hoping is a freaking cabinet made of wood Doesn't take any damage.

What? You fucking kidding me? The fireproof cabinet? Hey buddy, enjoy the rest of the game. You packing up? I'm gonna beat the traffic. Nice, good for you. Yeah, its hardness reduces any damage.

Oh. So, moving right along. What the fuck is that? What the fuck is that bullshit? That's silly, doesn't make any sense. It's actually world-breaking I'm unimmersed I'm not immersed goes to stop around for cabinets turn Who can this cabinet see you can see you can see Barnes through the window? Oh?

Sure can doesn't want to break the windows of this beautiful house. Look at this. Oh my god, he's blowing raspberries at him. He's confident. He's got his tongue on the window and he's like, bleh. Like, faces. I do like an, oh Billy. Oh Billy. It moves down to the middle of the room and Sadly it has to throw at Buggles This is going to be

Another poison bottle. It is a dirty 20. Yeah, that's a hit It is going to be 10 points of bludgeoning damage, and then I need a What did you save? Fail What did you save? Uh... A fail. How much of a- 15. 15, okay. That's very important. That's a regular fail, so here's what's gonna happen.

It's going to be... Nerve poison. You're clumsy one, and you take, until the end of your next turn, and then you take another nine points of poison damage. So it's just like, it's racking your nerves, and then it fires off another poison bottle. And that's another hit with a 25.

All right, so this is gonna be big old bludgeoning to the tune of 11 points of bludgeoning. I'm down. Shit. And now the fortitude save. So all this damage happened at once. Does it? Is that how it says? That is...

No, it's two separate instances. 16. 16, okay, not a critical failure, but now you get hit by a weakening poison. You're in Feebled 1, and you take another 10 points. The poison damage which for you just means you go to Dying 2. But holy shit, in Feebled, you take a status penalty to your strength base rolls. Doesn't really affect me. Doesn't affect you, yeah. okay, not too bad. But you are now dying too. Oh boy. Now, good news for you guys is that it has moved into the middle of the room so that, you know,

you all have a chance to hit it, depending on where you put yourself. It was kind of hiding in the northern portion of the room, but this hardness is making it very difficult for you to do damage. You're gonna do damage above and beyond it. Really thought, like, if I could just start unleashing fire on it, that that would Yeah, yeah.

Sorry, I'll stop. New Year's rest. The unsmoking New Year's rest. Yeah, see, this was working here, this sort of hit and run tactic, but at a certain point, maybe you got to move in close on it and start really pounding. Because Buggles might die. If Buggles rolls, natural two. We can't pound.

There's no real difference to where we're pounding. We were all in the room and it would be the same thing. The only difference is we have to stay out of its sight. Maybe. We were all attacked with every round. Yeah. Well, let's see. What you're going to do.

Buggles is near death. I'll roll away from dying. He just said I've all kept them. It's Z what you're gonna do. Buggles says, near death. I'll roll away from dying. He does have all kept them. It's Zephyr's turn. Zephyr takes out her longbow. First action. Gets into monastic archer stance. Maybe she's a little not used to it

after fighting with her fist for so long, but she gets right back into it. And tries to do a flurry of blows on the cabinet with the longbow. Riding a bike. Question, how long does the stupefied last for this? Thing stupefied asked last till the end of your turn, okay So I don't have it anymore because I did a full turn did a full turn stupefied

Okay, cool flurry of blows is actually a really great option here because you can combine your damage. Yes Yeah Hardness That's true that is with your bow that's the hurdle um Hardness. Hell yeah. You have to hit both turns. That's true. That is the hurdle. 24 for the first one. Hit.

Nice. Second one. Second one misses. So fortitude save please. Fortitude save, you got it. Oh that's right, I've got a striking rune on this. 21 on the fortitude save please. Fortitude save, you got it. Oh that's right, I've got a Striking Rune on this. Right, 21 on the Fortitude save. Just missed, got it.

Okay. So... 10 points of Piercing Damage. Zero points of damage. Damn, decent. Hardness 10? Hardness 10? Wow.

Zero points of damage. She's just gonna die. And that's fine. Okay, that was all I got, but yeah, she like knows that that first arrow was good and it just like didn't seem to do anything. Stuck into the cabinet and then Yeah.

Don't. Down stuff. You know what's too bad is that you didn't get your knowledge check off. I know. Yeah. Just didn't know something. I thought about that multiple times about that if there's anything at all that like give us an advantage. Yeah, yeah, very poorly Yep All right separate anything else nope nope three actions

Barnes Barnes will go with the mirror and appear in inside the room next to the cabinet, okay? You will swing with the mirror and appear in inside the room next to the cabinet. Okay. You will swing with the Kukri. It was a natural 20 that rolled off to a 23 to hit. Uh. It's less. Less. That's what I'm checking.

Less is on. 23 to hit. We're all screaming. Yes. Five. AC 24. AC 24. So you know the other thing is this like we just need to roll natural 20s

Yeah, that's like if we quit it will crush the hardness. Yeah, yeah, you have to crit All right, the barns outside will take a we'll take a step to his right and the barns inside will disappear Okay, step to the right. I'm set chum get buck geek Continues the healing him. Oh Yeah, and I healed four points on my turn. Still have the fast healing four, that'll be the last round that I do that.

I mean, that was huge. And then two action jawn, you hear her loot on her back, grr-eww, as one of the strings just snaps off, and she holds her hand up and then whips the string at the creature, and I cast live wire I conjure a length of sharp copper filament humming with electrical current that strikes out Electric loot yeah, it's electrified I created the electric guitar and look geek when electric so I'm gonna make an attack roll what to use what to use

I'm gonna give it a little AC bonus because you are doing that through Buggles unless you want to. I'm dying. Oh, you're dying, I'm sorry, then you're good. Let him die in peace. What is it called again? It is called Livewire.

Livewire from Player Core 2. All right, let's do this. Maybe I'm a real Livewire. Livewire. That's gonna be, with bless, 24. That's a hit.

That's a 24 with bless is a one. Yep. Yes. I thought for a second bless was two. So I was gonna say 25. Okay. 24. That's a hit.

So that's gonna be- I'm convening the turn after you find out what the AC is. You rolled exactly the AC. I almost said 34. You're lucky I didn't say 34. So I'm gonna roll... It's just regular success, so I take... Hold on. Oh yeah, regular success. So you take full damage. Yep. So... 2d4. Yeah, unfortunately I don't think it can do anything.

So you take 7 slashing and then... Hmm. Okay. I think... do those happen as two separate instances of damage? 11. Fully 11, because 2d4 is electricity damage and 2d4 is slashing damage. So together is 11. It's just 1d4.

What? Did you heighten it? Yes. It's heightened, so it's 2d4. It's 2d4 slashing and 2d4 electricity damage. It doesn't heighten until level 3. There is no level 2 of livewire, right? Is that a focus spell? It is. The cantrip, it's heightened plus 2 which means. It's heightened level 2. Every other level is when it gets its bonus. So it'll get it. It goes up to die at level three and then at level five.

It's telling me it's two D4 and two D4. Oh. This says the slashing damage, initial electricity damage and persistent electricity on a crit each increased by one D4. It's telling me my primal cantrip heightened to level two. Live wire. Yeah, cantrips are automatically heightened. No, I know it's automatically Can't trip automatically. Is that the heighten?

No, I know it's automatically heighten. The heighten condition says that the damage only goes up on a crit. The slashing damage, initial electricity damage, persistent electricity damage on a critical hit, each increased by 1d4. It's the item in the list is persistent electricity damage on a critical hit. That's the whole item. Yeah, persistent is the critical. Okay. All right. So now here's the question question is do those damages happen together or separately because if it's it's one

attack it says the wire deals 2d4 slashing damage and 2d4 electricity damage okay so all together yeah and you said you rolled 11 total total so one one point okay all right fighting really hard to one. One point of two. Okay. All right. Fighting really hard to not get one point of damage. I know, my God. Well, it's more about getting this right for the future. Totally. I just don't understand why it doesn't say heightened plus one

add one D four. You know, that's what like all these cantrips always say that. I just don't understand why it doesn't say that. Oh. Yeah. Yeah. It makes sense. I'm not a player, so I don't... I couldn't tell you about heightened. I know that it's heightened to level 2, so it says 2d4 and 2d4.

Yeah, I just thought that it got its bonus at level 3, but I think I'm wrong. Okay. Brother Ramius, be right about something. Can you roll knowledge on this? I think I am, yeah. I think I'm going to in this round. Arcana? It's Arcana. Arcana? It's Arcana. Arcana Asylum?

Are you sure it's Arcana Asylum? Yeah. God, what are you thinking? Talk it through. I'm tortured about bringing Buggles up or just stabilizing him. Just always run into this problem. He's still, he's the most direct target.

So if I bring him up and I don't roll that well, I wouldn't worry about bringing me up. Well, the one thing, I mean- He goes before the creature, so you get up in the other way. I'm now the new target also, because I'm standing right behind Buggles. Yeah, I know. I don't, there's really, there's really nothing I can do

because I'm not gonna be able to. That's what I'm thinking. Nothing I can do like does any damage to it. I don't this really there's only nothing I can do because I'm not gonna bet that's nothing I can do like does Any damage I don't think you can do anything. Yeah So let me die. Just let me tie I can probably stabilize and no no no I'm gonna definitely stabilize you I just feel like you have your bottle cap I feel like stabilizing you is Better than bringing you back up right now. For sure. Unless we're desperate.

Um, we just need Barnes to just keep chipping away at this thing. So yeah, I will... Ramius will stabilize Buggles. Buggles, no! And he'll stabilize you. And then... I will attempt to recall knowledge. Now, the problem is I... I probably can't. I, the problem is I probably can't.

I probably can't. I don't. Because, you know, you have to be trained in the skill. And I imagine this is like arcana. What do you have? Religion. A lore? Nature.

I could do an arcana check on my turn. Do you have crafting? No. Sure. I don't have crafting, I don't an Arcana check on my turn. Do you have crafting? No. I don't have crafting, I don't have Arcana, and I don't have... Yeah. Any lore, any relevant lore. Genealogy lore. You're really ill-equipped to help in this combat. Yeah, yeah, I just wish...

Of course I wish I had healed Bugles earlier. I think we all wish that. Yeah, I mean it would have bought me a round at best. Right, and I just felt like the Spirit Damage would go through. I thought it would be a surprise. Yeah, like a really good option. I'm surprised the fire didn't go through. Okay, I will... Oh, what about your... Your debieven ability? Yeah, it's you know mostly useless because it's a grab just a grab. Oh, you don't have the thing I have. No, I don't have the way of energy beams. Yeah, I don't have that sadly. Alright, so You know, I guess I will aid Zephyr with my final action by attempting to distract the

creature just before she goes. Draw its attention for a moment. Okay. Very cool. Moving right along. Buggles will move in the initiative order, which happens to be right now at the top of round five. So, Buggles, I need a death save.

He's stable, I'm stable. You're stable, okay. So that's the end of your turn. Stable and wounded one. Stable, wounded, wounded one. The cabinet's turn. And of course, Gick called it. Gick is standing right there, ready.

You need a potion, Gick? Here's one. Not thirsty, I don't need it. I'm a little fast, Scarecrow. I'm a little fast, Scarecrow. I'm full, no thank you. 19 don't need it. No. I'm a little fast, Scarecrow. I'm a little fast, Scarecrow. I'm full. No, thank you. 19 to hit. Miss.

Misses with the 19. Tsh. Throws the second one. Misses with the second one. Wow. Gigg is charmed. She's so smart. No, thank you.

And I'm gonna shoot the moon on the third one here. Natural one. Don't you dare. Natural one. Out of the box. Natural one. 19 out of the box, by the way. box by the way look at accountant are you doing over there not gonna count it as you shouldn't miss potion potion potion miss miss miss on the ground great little opening here can you take advantage of it Zephyr

that's what I'm hoping for. Zephyr. Attempting an aid here to create a distraction. A 17, so that'll be a success. A plus one. And so plus one. All right, so her hand wraps. Wait, do you have to, and does she have to use it on the next attack?

I am gonna use it. You should aid the second attack. My aid is set up to her attack. Can she choose? Okay, whatever, yep, sure. It's not for both of them? Doesn't matter, go ahead. I don't know, yeah.

So you see her hand wrap start to glow and I'm gonna use my last focus point right now to do interrupt evil again with the flurry of blows on the bow. So hopefully this extra damage will happen. right now to do interrupt people again with the flurry of blows on the bow. So hopefully this extra damage will happen. Um, let's go. Oh, the first one is not going to hit. Um, second one, not going to hit natural five each time. Um,

I rolled some of those. Cool, so those just miss. Trying to think, because I don't have the knowledge either that would be required. Pickle dance. Yeah, no, I'm just trying to think of what else I can do. That was one action. You could aid me. Or have you aided me already? You did aid me.

I don't remember, but. You do they'd be. I don't remember, but um... Yeah, I don't... I mean I guess I'll cast Guidance on Gic, because that'll give you a save benefit. Or your Knowledge Check. Yeah, or the Knowledge Check. Yeah, or your Knowledge Check. Yeah.

And how much was that? That was one. And for my last one, can I just do a flavor, any knowledge check, occultism? Does that apply? No, but you can try it. You can always try, right? Like it'll just be a higher DC to try and unlock occult knowledge. It's not the worst. It's better than religion. Is perception better? It's better than religion. Is perception better? It's better than religion. Or do you think a cult? No, no. You want to roll a lore to try and... Perception is just gonna... What do I see?

I'll try to roll in the cult. She's just trying to figure out how to help here. Natural 20! Tell me! Tell me about this cabinet. Um... With the... I don't have any pluses to that. 27. Okay, so you do have pluses.

You have seven. Well, I mean the extra. All right, so it has construct armor. Yeah. All right, so it's immune to bleed, death effects, disease, doom, drain, fatigue, healing, mental, non-lethal attacks, paralyzed, poison, sickened, spirit, unconsciousness, vitality, and void damage. Damn.

Okay, until you crit it or get it past half of its hit points, it just is eating 10 points of damage every single time. Okay. If you crit it once, it'll shatter. We break them. That's the window. Hunter armor is one of the coolest things in the game.

We get it below half, the hardness goes away. Right, so the way you're chipping away, once you get to the halfway point, it'll break or a single crit I forgot about that. See that was the first training thing is this yeah, we're gonna be here all night I let you guys know that I didn't want to say I knew it would like snowball If we just get it like I see my arrows missing and us not like doing damage But I'm like if we just get it down to a certain amount. We'll get rid of this armor. It has Okay. Now I could be wrong about the fire damage bypassing hardness,

but the way I read it here is this the hardness reduces any damage. And I've dug through, but you know, it could be something wrong. And then the only one E that wasn't magical and shit bypass. Yeah. But here it says any damage. I thought there could be a more specific rule buried in the text that I just don't have. So I'm moving as if it doesn't affect it. Awesome. Well, that was helpful. Yeah, very helpful.

That was extremely helpful. Yep, natural 20 on a bow would have been even better. You know what? We would have broken the armor. Or a single attack. Would have been a miss. But it would have resulted in a regular hit, not even a crit, so don't beat yourself up too much.

I'm not, I'm not. I think you should beat your... Because it's probably a minus. I think I did. Smelling yourself up. I think I did a good job. I think I did a good attack. You should be very proud of your... I think he was the same. it's probably a minus. I think I like it You should be very proud of you. I think he was just saying she had rolled that your attack earlier I can't believe you guys are trying to bring me down

I'm not I'm trying to say don't worry about you should have done the knowledge check that was the in there did the right thing It's the most helpful thing with anyone's What's your name me man personally no? Barnes your turn! It's your turn! Same turn. Glint the mirror, up here in the room, swing, get out. Natural 20.

Come on now! Get him! Break that hardness, dude! Not a natural 20, but it's gonna be a hit. With a 28. It is a hit! Nice. Powerfully, yeah.

There you go. Maybe I'll bring it below half. Do more than 10 points of damage. Okay, 19 points of damage. Hey, that's pretty good. Whoa, that's more than 10. Solid. All right, so nine of that is gonna go through. Nice.

And then I'll five foot step and the inside one will disappear. And there you go. Still looking pretty strong there. Gic Muck. Gic is gonna again. Lucky little half gnome. She's lucky.

Half gnome. You want me to be half gnome? Half gnome half- Uh, gnome. She's lucky. You want her to be a half gnome? Half gnome? I'm half gnome? Just a good half as my mother would say. So much going against you Sydney, because I don't like halflings, gnomes, or bards, so it's like three things that you're just like- I'm not a halfling!

He prefers human fighters. But he hates playing humans. He hates playing humans, but halflings and gnomes. What are we doing? Oh my gosh? All right, I'm gonna do what do you like? Do you like elves dwarves? Do you even like elves or dwarves? They're all right. Yeah Wow look at anybody. I'll take an Elven or dwarf I think him not hating something says a lot. That's how he likes it. Goblin. No, but I enjoy skits goblins I actually hate goblins and that's I've gone on record to say that Fascinating.

Why do you play Pathfinder? Skitt's Agrabul still skates, you can turn anything into gold. Seriously, why do you play Pathfinder? Yeah, like when they're like, we should play Weeby Goblins, I'm like, I'd rather kill myself. That sounds awful.

That's not my cup of tea. I'm gonna do, there's not many things I can do against this type of creature to do max types of damage. Is this the pep talk you give to the group? Yeah, everybody be lower your expectations Inspirational at this bum and do my best. Hey, and I'm gonna do live wire again. I've why okay You're the new Joe Bryant, oh my some fun. You're the new Joe O'Brien. Oh my God. We're all the new Joe O'Brien.

It's like V for vendetta. I'll put on a Joe mask. My leg. I'll put on a Joe. I'm Joe O'Brien. We become anarchists by just rolling ones all the time, ruining the show. Joe, stop.

Is it like you permanently lose a limb and can never have it regrow? Sonya. Sonya? From Kingston. I swear. Jamaica? Jamaica?

Ontario. Canada! We've been on a Canada run lately. Canada kick! Is that outside Toronto? I have no idea. This one is titled. Tower of the King!

2E is confusing. That's true. Yes. You didn't read your spell description ahead of time and have forgotten how many actions it takes to cast. You can only take one action each turn for the next one D three rounds. Oh my gosh.

You desperately try to figure out the rules of your spell. Oh. On a successful will save, you reduce this to one round, a critical success. No. Oh, okay, okay. You get a will save Against the targets AC. You get a will save against the targets AC. All right, what's my will?

It's not too shabby. All right, let's see. That's gonna be an 18. Just a regular fail. So 1d3. 1d3 rounds. Two rounds. One action. Slowed two for two rounds.

This isn't the worst thing. No, people are just saying you can't do anything. Well, it's pretty bad This isn't the worst thing. No. It wasn't a ton you could do anyway. Well it's pretty bad because she was sustaining that thing. She can still do that. No, it's over. Oh, okay. Yeah, that just happened. What could get tricky?

Oh wait, so here's my question. Can I still, I was gonna move on my turn or did I lose that now because of this? How many actions did you take? This was a two, John, spell. Could I use my third action to move? I was going to do that. Yeah.

This is pure Jamfia. Yeah, I'm going to say finish your turn the next two rounds. OK. She already broke the rule. You've already broken the rule. If you'd only used one action, I'd be like, let's call it here for this round, but you've used two. So the spell failed.

I want to get the full use out of this. Yeah, you haven't won an action. The spell failed. She goes to reach for Buggles, but knows that she can't really do anything. So she's just gonna move. He's all right, Kik. I've got him.

Are you sure? I've got him. Okay. Get out of the way. Okay. And she runs over to the side. You should run to a better place. I've never had to do nothing like this.

Sorry. And she just stands there kind of breathing heavy run a better place. I've never had to do nothing like this, sorry. And she just stands there kind of breathing heavy and she's so, she's never had to deal with this. You're doing well. Okay. Stay behind me. Oh wait, you're completely across the battlefield. Oh, come the other way?

No, no, no, I wasn't looking at the map, I was just picturing you running behind Barnes and I. All right, it's Brother Ramey's turn. Ramey? Ramey? Ramey? Behind blinds or not? Behind blinds or not? Behind blinds or not? All right, it's Brother Rammus. Ramu? Ramu? Ramu. Ramu? Whatcha gonna do, Brother Ramu?

Whatcha gonna do when they come for Ramu? He will just heal Zephyr. I'm down less than 10, I'm only down eight. He will. I'll take it, but. Heal Zephyr. Okay. With a level one heal.

So 15 points of healing. Thank you. And then he will just continue to attempt, he to attempt to aid Barnes in his attack. Attempt to aid Barnes on his attack. It goes to the next round. Buggles, you're still unconscious but stable? Yes. Okay.

I should just remove the dying two condition from you. Just unconch. All right, so then it's the creature's turn, the apothecothecaries cabinet he is going to slide down and fire a Gik-Mak No one else was in range Okay That is gonna be a 22 to hit okay That is gonna hit I'm gonna do my unexpected unexpected shift

I'm gonna try it. Let me flat check McFlu Not 20. Oh, there you go useless So what happens on a success you gain resistance to all damage equal to your level and you gain a plus two circumference Saving throws against the effect which is important because because it's huge. What's the plus? Plus two. Six. So resistance four and then? Yeah, and I gain Dazzled for one round.

Do I move though? I'm just trying to check. No, you shimmer out of existence and then come back. And then I come back. Okay. I gain resistance to all damage equal to my level. You shimmer out of existence and then right back in. Okay. All right, so. I gain resistance to all damage equal to my level, so. It's four. Four. And then a plus two. So all damage, so your resistance is four.

All right, so let's start with the bludgeoning damage. First you're gonna take eight points of bludgeoning, so only four points of bludgeoning. Now give me a fortitude save with a plus two because of this. Yeah, fiat. Let me roll this one again, this one was a good one. Yeah. Fiat. I rolled this one again, this one was a good one. Yeah.

Kind of. That's gonna be a 15 plus two, so 17. 17, all right, so just a regular failure. That is going to be the Noxious Poison. You are sickened one until the end of your turn, as well as dazzled, and you take nine points of damage, poison damage, which is really gonna be five. And it does the same thing again, throws another one at you, but very low chance to hit. I mean, it's not like I'm gonna roll a natural nine. That is an

18, but you're dazzled and sickened. Okay, hold on, let me add those. Does that take... Dazzled won't affect your AC. I'm second will second second down one one So no, it's not ahead. What's your AC 21 20? You got an 18. Did I say 18? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, you're good Okay, so dazzle and sicken and that's its turn and the him appealing is done and the him appealing is done It's done. Does that also mean he doesn't have any temporary hit points? I believe those would go away. Let me double check.

Hymn of Healing. I'll check that. OK. Great. First time each round, you sustain the spell, so yeah. So. Sepha! Yeah, it lasts for one round, so yeah.

Is your light in the room still popping in there, Joe? Yeah. Okay. So because the cabinet moved, I'm gonna have to move, so she moves to the opposite end of this walkway. Am I out of Bless now? We didn't recenter it. No, Bless is the green.

Right, but we didn't, oh, it stays where you were. No, it moves with me. Okay. Oh, okay. Let me move it then to, where are you down there? Boop, yeah, that would- Okay, so I'm out, but this is the only place I can really hit it, unless I move off the map.

I mean, you can't move one space closer. I would have to move one space, no, because then I'm within my volley and I take more negatives. So, this is fine. All right, so she moves. Flurry of blows with the bow. I'll sustain it next time.

Let's go. You do. 20. Just say four. 23. Is there a plus one anywhere? There would be. There would have been.

There would have been. There would have been. But it would have been a minus two. But a net minus one. Yeah, that's a't. Net minus one. Yes. Yeah, that's a miss. Miss, miss. Yeah.

Wait a minute, don't you have a striking rune on this, Beau? Yeah. I have a potency rune and a striking rune. This is insane. You just have to hit. You'll do so much damage. I did, I did the first time with one and it all did not go, it has hard as 10.

Well, if you hit both, I mean, you'll do so much. Well, that's a ton of damage. You know, single creatures. So that didn't work. That was two actions. Trying to think who's going next. I am. I got aid from Brother Ami. You have aid already.

Attempted aid. Throw stuff at you. So there's no point in giving you guidance. Ooh. I'll aid Gic next time. Okay. Yeah, okay. Yeah, thanks.

Well, Gic aid. Were you there Gic aid and aid aid? Gic aid. Pause. So the cabin has moved, but would you say I can see this square that I'm picking on the map? Yes.

Great. A second Barnes appears there. Boop. I guess I'm technically not flanking it with myself because I'm not threatening outside the window. Yeah, it's kind of put itself in a weird position there where... You wouldn't be flanking it. I'm a flank.

That's the path through the center of the creature. Okay, great. All right. Sadly, I'm outside the bless. No, I'm in it, I'm in it. You're in it. Yeah, it's not going through the wall, but bless doesn't work.

Miss. Oh, such a slog. Put off guard of it. Wow. Wow. Missed by even more as I natural wand on the eight. Woo! Okay, the barn's outside, takes a five foot step. This is fun.

Barn's outside. This is so fun. Hang out. Hang out. Bit of a slog, bit of a slog. But you're playing it safe. Yeah. Right. You know, to keep yourselves up

and so it is a little more grindy in that respect. Right now it's kind of a war of attrition here. Gek, what do you got? Anything? You got one action. I have one action. I could retch, cause I'm sickened, but I don't get to do anything else anyway, so I will give... It's not a bad idea. Can I aid you on your retch? No, it's not a good idea, right,

because we know this poison goes away at the end of her turn. Oh yeah, sickened is gonna go away. You know what? You're right. I'm just going to move so this thing can't throw another bottle at me. That's a good idea. Okay. So one action, I'm just going to move so this thing can't throw another bottle at me. That's a good idea. Okay. So one action, I'm gonna move up to like the direct north corner of this building so it doesn't have lines on me. Doesn't have an angle.

No angle. What's its angle? Okay, so you move and it's Brother Ramious' turn. You guys gotta be real careful leaving just the body of Buggles there as its only target. I wish I could help. Just throw that out there for people following along at home.

This is not a particularly intelligent creature. Okay. Brother Ramius, go up and get Buggles. Throw that out there. And drag him back. We're Buggles fans. He is very weak. Buggles or brotheramius? Brotheramius! Brotheramius.

Buckles only weighs like 30 pounds. Yeah. You have books that are heavier than buckles. How uh, how, what's your, what do we need to say your bulk was? I think your bulk is, I have, it's, I don't know, it's negligible. Pretty sure. I don't have any equipment, I'm like. It's like two or something. I weigh 35 pounds. It's, it's three or something pretty sure you don't have any equipment I'm like it's like two or so I weigh 35 pounds. It's it's something to leave you're getting there wrong I'm sure we were sure we were saying because we didn't include the weight of the person. It's not just what you carry It's like your weight included, and I think they were saying we didn't include that or something if I remember correctly yeah But he doesn't really have anything. That's up Anyway, I'm gonna attempt to drag Buggles out of the line of sight of this thing. Okay So first action move up second action grab Buggles third action Say move half speed move half speed. So I'll drag him back ten feet

And I want to I want to put him in such a way that like that it's funny. No that I'm between That's like my face and somebody's butt Just put his butt up in the air. I always do that video games. I put his hand in some warm water. Yeah So try I want to move him You know I just move him ten feet down But put me... Like that? Yeah.

Put me on the other side of him. Yeah, you are there, right? No, like on the other side so that I'm between him and the creature. You pushed him in your... Yeah, I'm essentially, like I'm dragging him, but then I'm moving myself around so that I'm between... Right, you're kind of positioning yourself. I'm putting my back to the creature

so that I can protect Buggles from any extraneous shots. Okay. Well, it would be Buggles turning the top around seven instead of the cabinet's turn and the cabinet sure enough is going to move up and start firing at Ramius. Let's see if the healer can... Here come the Kreats! Here come the Kreats!

25 to hit. Thank God. Just trying to dodge Kreats. 25 to hit. Ah, thank God. Just trying to dodge Kreats. 14 points of bludgeoning and give me a fortitude save. Oof. 14 points of bludgeoning. Natural 20. Yes. Nice.

Hell yeah. There you go. Northfaldrath. Unaffected. Natural. 20. Second. Utae. 20! Second. Who tie?

Miss. Yes! Ramius! Huge. Wow, what a turn. Wow! Doesn't take that poison. Big round.

Huge. Big round. Huge. Chepa! Chepa! Dang. This cabinet. Well, no, but Brother Ramius moved now,

so the Bless moved and I'm within it. Do I have a line of sight to it from here? Yeah, let's see. I can see a part of it. Yeah, it's going to get a bonus to its AC, and you've already been struggling to hit it. So just throw that out there. I'm actually going to move then.

I'm going to move. I'm sorry, she would not take a penalty from that spot. No? If she moves. From the center of your square to the center of the square the creatures in it doesn't pass any obstacles No, but like when I click on her I just see a sliver of her line of sight it less than half the creatures exposed based on that doesn't matter sight line Right. Yeah. Yeah, you can only see half the creature less than half the creature from that position if you step down no pet Yeah, step down ten feet. I want to step down ten feet, but also back five feet so I'm not in my volley

But you're back and nothing. I'm still I yes, I'll still be within the bless so all right 20 gotta get it um um no 22 23 so 23 for the first one wait with the oh I roll the natural 11 I have a plus 11 you should roll less that's one um yeah but it's just like I'm already rolling at 11 it's like I'm rolling a 2 right or 3 oh my god my precious dice this is out of the box and I messed with it So then you get a roll it in the box. Oh, was it a good roll? Kate has located the worst dice luck on the entire network. It's really natural eight and she's kind of like when we hit these one Creature fights and their AC so high and they don't it's just like of like, when we hit these one creature fights and their AC is so high and they don't,

it's just like, I'm not gonna do help, no one's gonna do any damage. It's not crazy high, I mean, I think you and I can probably hit it on a 13 or above. Yeah. Right? With the Bless. Yeah, that's not insane. You just don't roll that number. Well, I do, just not when I'm rolling to hit, I just rolled one for like a knowledge check. Right, another thing you'll know is like, if you get rid of that construct armor, it's AC drops as well Yeah, so like you'll do full damage and it's easier to hit it snowballs down. Yeah, I'm just gonna try it again Yeah, please I have to go to the bathroom so bad

You got this Please No, miss Do something Yes, yes, yes, bong lie if you have to Same turn, glint, appear, swing Glint, glint

Was anyone aiding me? I don't think so Yes, Bonds. Lie if you have to. Same turn. Glint, appear, swing. Glint. Was anyone aiding me? I don't think so. Same roll, natural four. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Dickluck. No one believed in me. I have one action.

I moved you five feet to the left. Thank you. I'm gonna give guidance to Zephyr. Ramius. And you haven't done that yet, right? This combat. Ramiush. Ramiush.

Ramius is going to continue to push, to carry Buggles away. Okay. So, move him another 10 feet, and then another 10 feet, till we're both behind Barnes. Okay. And so that'll be two actions.

And then last action he'll aid Barnes. Attempts anyway. Aid Barnes, okay. You have an aid of, oh it doesn't matter, it's not curtains. Okay, it's cabinet's turn. All right, so cabinet, Zephyr's a little far, Zepr, you're actually another five feet back, right? You're 30 feet away. All right So it's gonna take a penalty here, but it's gonna start flinging at you

That is going to be a really good roll with a minus two at the 28 to hit. Not a crit. Not a crit Okay, you're going to take to start 8 points of bludgeoning damage and then I need a fortitude save. Can I get a plus one from the guidance? Yep. Uh, fortitude... Oh, it's a 16.

16 is a failure. You will take a weakening poison. You are in feebled 1 until the end of your next turn. And you will take another eight points of poison damage. It has two more attacks. This one also with a minus two, very, very low chance to hit. But I feel like my dice slot is gonna start turning around.

Not on that roll, not on that roll. I'm gonna take a third attack here. I'm going for the crit. And not a crit, but yeah, 18. Miss. All right, so one hits, does significant damage, and then a miss, and a miss, and now it's your turn, Zef. So now I'm out of Bless again.

Yes. But. Sue, sorry. Yeah, my bow has the striking rune. So, Flurry of blows come on with the bow Start making up numbers man. I got a fucking pain. Yes, come on something Yep, miss miss I swear to God man I'm gonna move anybody natural 15 or higher anyone I'm gonna move Okay, just like I don't know here. Maybe because I feel like it'll take a penalty. It can't see me fully okay

And I don't have anything else to do. I've aided everyone, guidance, yeah. All right. Yeah, and I don't think bringing Buggles back does anything, right? Yeah, and I don't want to risk rolling again. If you're not gonna do more than 10 points damage, so you could roll a crit, at least it's a chance.

I can't even. I mean, I would argue it would be helpful. And if a crit just takes out the armor, then we want as many attacks on us. I agree. So yeah, I agree. Bring him back, Mr. At this point, I've probably run

10,000 hours worth of Pathfinder. Right? At least maybe less. You're a Malcolm Gladwell threshold. My Gladwell threshold. I mean, there is a way to quantify this. We have released most of the Pathfinder you run. Yeah, someone could do the math, right?

Every episode was a different length. And then Geo. Don't put a lot on your row of free time. That's not like. Right. Yeah, and then there was previous. All of Jade region. All of Jade region and other games as well.

And I've been sitting here for the last half hour knowing that this is how this was gonna go. You know what I mean? Like sure, a crit changes things considerably, but this sucks. Yeah. I was like, where are you going with this? This is just, this is fucking awful, right?

And so like, my- Finally, we said it. All agree. I think it's important to say that, like I don't think that, I think there are people that have problems with the adventure. I'm not talking about the adventure. I'm not talking about the adventure.

I'm just talking about, and I'm not talking about Pathfinder 2e as a whole. Although this problem comes up over and over again. It part of me thinks like, okay, another thing I've been spending last half hour on is like, how can I fucking make this interesting? Because here's the thing, here's the elephant in the room, the unspoken thing.

There's no payoff here, right? Like I can create a payoff. You go in and there's a unspoken thing. There's no payoff here, right? Like I can create a payoff. You go in and there's a magical bard fucking guitar. Okay, then you made it worthwhile. Like I've done shit like that, because you worked so hard. The payoff is not that great. Not to mention, yeah, you can go back to the camp

and get an antidote from the smiling wolf. The antidote just gives her a bonus to the save. Right? Oh my god, I didn't even know that. What? We're leaving, we're leaving. Smiling wolf. Yeah, they just give her a bonus to the same But here's the other thing it's like I don't want to do this for another half hour, but here's the thing We it's a weird room. It's a weird size creature that I think our strategy of Hopping in in rain shooting getting out of the way and just waiting for that natural 20 or chipping down is the only way to do it. Right.

It's a fact that we're doing a show. Like we could make it more interesting, but the only way we would do that is to unnecessarily put our characters in danger. Right, and I can fast forward and say, okay, you know what, so your strategy has proved, and they say this all the time, it's like, when'd you know you have the fight in hand?

You'd be like, all right, hand waving. But the thing is, there's still this opening for this thing to fuck you up. It's already taking Buggles down. If I had hit you or if I hit Zephyr or Gic a couple more times, they're down. Now Ramius has to go up there and heal and Ramius is the target.

If Ramius goes down, now all of a sudden it's just Bart. Like there's still a threat. Now we've accounted for that. And I think now no one's gonna get hit for the rest of this cop. Yeah, cause what we're saying is like. We'll move in, shoot, move out. Yeah, Ramius and Gic, for that, and I think now no one's gonna get hit for the rest of this combat. Yeah, because what we're saying is like- We'll move in, shoot, move out. Yeah, Ramius and Gic, for instance, have crossbows.

So we can just step in, shoot our crossbow, step out. Granted, we're not gonna hit and do damage with the crossbow unless we roll a natural 20, so we're just waiting. And we break the armor. To roll a natural 20. We're waiting for me to hit on both of my arrows or for- Me to roll a natural 20. Yeah.

And I also, and this is a terrible thing for GM to say, but it's honest and that's why I want to say it. I don't fucking care about this encounter. It doesn't matter. So we're having a big win. What are we doing here? This is like just sort of a pointless side quest that is not really directly tied to the plot or anything.

If someone had a personal grudge against this cabinet from their childhood, then we could justify hanging out here and doing this. There's a world, right, where you come into this square from the south, okay, and you see the elf and two of her companions sleeping in the bedrolls. And you go over there, they wake up, and that fight starts. Maybe you don't even alert the other three guys, and you go into this middle building, and you fight the Obatacary cabinet. Then you're all weakened by the time

you get to fight the other guys who see you through the window when you go to get Deniji. So like- So are you saying we were almost too good? I'm just saying that like, this way of doing it, like where you've already beaten all the other relevant combatants in this area, it's like, who fucking cares? The treasure in here sucks. So why don't you just hand wave it? Yeah, you get the antidote.

I'm going to hand wave it. I mean, yeah, like you're saying, like this method will prevent any of us really from getting hit. It'll just take forever. So it's like you, after you spend like a few minutes, just like flashing in and out of here, and you eventually like you wear it down and you destroy it and you can walk in and like. So anticlimactic and so shitty. That's how some fights are.

It's like what are we doing? You just promised that there's no climax anyway. There's nothing, right? Like so why don't we just rip the bandaid off now? Unless, unless. That's a fucking thing. It makes sense though, it's story wise how some fights are. Like we just had someone die and there's no reason for us to risk anything.

We would just have like a calm quote unquote combat where it's like you and I are just trying to find the right combination and like the aim. And you all have bottle caps except Sydney at this point. So like even if I do a fucking crit to take you to dying two or you're wounded. So maybe to dying three, it doesn't matter. It doesn't.

What could a Kool-Aid man out the door? Like, is that something I can do? No, the thing is like, I thought about it like, crashing through the window, but like it has a negative five. It doesn't know. And also like its job is to protect the apothecary shop. It's not going to destroy the windows.

It knows that its primary objective is to save it. So, you kill it, okay? You kill it. Yeah! Dumb fucking accountant. Yeah! It's a bus with its tears. Oh, man.

It just feels good when you work for one. Yeah. I mean, really. I don't blame the designers or anything like that. It's just the perfect storm. It's a perfect storm of just, yeah. We talked about this on Cannon Fodder probably multiple times over the years.

But definitely I remember many years ago discussing this exact situation. Not this exact situation, obviously, but the situation where you find the party encountering a high AC enemy that poses them no threat, but is an obstacle to what they have to get through. And you're just waiting and waiting and waiting for someone to just roll a natural 20,

basically around the room. And it gets so boring when the die rolls kill the night. They just kill the energy in the room. They kill the fun of the game. It's also a cabinet, we can't role play with it. Right, exactly. It just, it. Just make the cabinet surrender.

I can't. Yeah, I know, it's hard to get emotionally invested in the outcome of this fight when it's a cabinet. It's also crazy that it was immune to, obviously mental, like I'm a bard, I can't do much with that, but like fire, spirit, vitality, void. That's the thing with these like. Does that go away with the armor, when the armor goes down? but like fire, spirit, vitality, void.

Like it was like. Does that go away with the armor when the armor goes down? No, it still has its constant communities I believe. It's just, it's AC drops from 24 to 20. And like it had 80 hit points to start with. You've got it down to 54. So you have to do another 14 points of damage to that or a single crit in eight rounds.

So the blue one got a single crit. If I don't, if I didn't crit it, I mean, max damage for me on the Kukri is 22 points of damage. So max damage is 12. So I'd have to hit it twice more. And you're not gonna max damage. So it's three more hits or a Zephyr hit. Yeah.

The last time I rolled a natural 20 on this die was on the saving throw for sleep. I mean, I'll complain about the AP. I rolled a natural 20 in this up on the poison save. That was huge. But that was my rose quartz. I'll complain about the AP because I don't know the people who wrote it, and I'm sorry.

But these single character encounters, they're always a little bit too, not like, it's a little bit too hard, but it's a little bit too intense where it's like, why is it immune to everything, including fire? We have Buggles here who can do do fire damage and then I don't. Oh yeah. You know what?

It's not even that it's immune to fire. It just says hardness 10. And it applies to fire. It doesn't do us any good. It's not weak to it in any way, which doesn't make sense because it's a wooden cabinet. Is the balance there that it goes away so they can beef up the hardness? It's hardness 10 instead of hardness five. So the math is a little more even when the, I don't know, I'm not a game designer.

I just like, it dares. It did feel like we were knocking our head against the wall. It just run up against it when you feel like there's no imminent danger to the party. Yeah. And you're not moving forward. It's like. Yeah, at best I'm just like sapping your resources,

which is fun, and there's a point to that as well. We could also just go rest. Yeah. Right, yeah, rest before you try and make your way back to the camp, because you might get lost again. Who knows what's gonna happen there? It's just, yeah, very frustrating. And I've been like-

I don't think there's anything wrong with hand waving. No, no, no. I think it's fine to say, eventually you- We arrived at the strategy that would defeat it, and are now at no risk of taking any damage. It just would take. Just take. I mean, the way we're rolling it, we'd be here all night.

Yeah, that is very interesting. I was worried about the windows. It's just like firing through the windows is the one reason I was saying we shouldn't hand wave it. But when you say that it is categorically opposed to breaking the windows in the place, it's like, okay. Yeah, well, we'll eventually defeat it. Yeah, I thought about it early on.

It's like, just to mix it up. It like does a drawer attack, but I'm like, I don't think it would do that. Its job is to protect this building. And so. So we get the antidote and we march back to the other room. Is there anything else in there?

Shove it down our throat. Yeah. Where's your goddamn antidote? I'm just gonna combine all the treasures. You better roll a save. You better save on this. We're not giving you any more help. Shut it down your throat. Where's your goddamn antidote? I'm just gonna combine all the treasures. You better roll a save! We're not giving you any more help. You get one lesser antidote.

What the fuck? Oh my god, what is inside the cabinet? There better be a striking weapon in there. No, it's all garbage. And the thing is, I could add something, I shouldn't say garbage, but it's mainly garbage. Are there any healing potions? It's one moderate antidote To Eagle Eye elixirs. Oh, that's good

To cheetahs elixir moderate And then if you would search the bandit camp, let's just say you search the fucking bandit camp. There's a feather token fan Which it's a 15 gold thing item. It allows you to fan in a given direction. It's like it helps boats. OK, which if you're sailing out of here in the Little Ice Rime, that will be helpful. OK, they'll just give you shit if you're not going to use it later.

Right. And two bark skin potions. Cool. That might actually help you. Yeah, it's a lot of stuff. All right, so it's a lot of stuff, right? But like nothing, no one big marquee item. Right. Yeah Yeah. No maestro's fiddle in there for a little. No maestro's fiddle. That broken the fight. I open the cabinet. There's a broken fiddle inside. Fight break glass.

Yeah, so that's, that's the end of the fight. Got your potions. I'm so relieved. Kill these other people. What are you doing? I'm sorry that we can't roll natural 20. It's not your fault. We we guide. Well, I guess we'll rest and then we'll guide them out back to the they want to leave.

Okay. We had administer the answer the antidote. All right. So return to her. Return to her. Okay. Let's get into an extensive conversation with the Raiders They're sleeping

Guys were gone. Don't wake them. Yeah, they can't they're finally kidding. You're gonna miss for the second trying to kill us You're gone 48 seconds. They fell asleep But she's still on the ground and brother amyus will bring up the moderate antidote. And he'll say, easy, easy there. And he'll administer the potion. Take a sip of this. OK.

Easy. And Buggles is huddling outside because the dog is still in there. Oh. So he's just sort of peeking around the doorframe. He's afraid to come into the room. How does the dog go away? Will the dog attack me?

It's like three hours. Wow. So if he comes in, he's just gonna be like, stay over there, don't come close to me, just stay, like, even keep its distance. But like right now, it's just like, he's gonna stay out of the room completely. I'm not gonna roll for the antidote.

What? You are fired up. Fuck, what am I saying? It didn't work. Yeah. See you next week! You know what, that would be hilarious. I know.

I was thinking like, let's not even fucking give it to her. Who is she in this world? I mean, the moderate antidote is- You should keep the antidote, just bring her back to camp. I think we could get her back alive in time. She's sick. It's worth the risk. What, she's just loopy for like a day? Yeah, they said she's not even gonna die.

Was that a bad trip? She's not even gonna die from it. We'll just keep her hydrated. I think she's coming out of it. Oh. And then she like, she pushes herself against the back of the wall. It's like, oh, please, please don't, please.

No, it's okay. I don't mean you any harm, please. Friends of, we're friends of Sakuachi. Sakuachi has sent us. Is he okay? Yes, he's okay. He's back at camp and we didn't want to expose him to any unnecessary danger. Oh, and she's like, got a hangover, kind of like,

oh, fuck. You're fine, you were poisoned. Fuck! And you've just started to come out of it. Oh my fucking head! You hit your head also? So fucking angry at so many things. There is no need.

Ramies, aren't you a doctor? Shouldn't you look at her head? She'll be fine. I don't know if he can fix the anger. It's just going to take some time to come out of it. Can we hand wave healing for Brother Ramies? To heal all of us and then we can just get out of here Um you're not spending that you're gonna spend the night. We're gonna rest and heal a lot of time between us. Oh We almost alienated our whole audience trying to get time to save you oh, but we'll just rest here

I'm sure he's got some amazing story progressing treasure Visibly shaking. Yeah, we did. That's what happened. The real treasure is making sure you're okay. As long as you're okay. The best part of it is I will be a very important part of the remainder of this adventure. I'm so glad you saved me. What was your name again?

In a way that could have killed one of you. What was your name again? I don't know. Daniji. Ranford Luigi. I don't know. Stop! My backstory doesn't matter.

I'm barely relevant. I'm a fetch quest. You found me! May I introduce yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah How is King Abu this day? Oh, Abu! It's great. It was a Game of Thrones this day. You found Sakawachi, so he's safe. What of Enuma and the others? Enuma is safe as well, but your other companion was another. Uli-Cook and... Uli-Cook?

Yes, we believe one of them to be with the Hobgoblins. And one has left the city. So we are still searching. Hisoi? Oh no, that's a Smiling Wolf. Don't worry though. Sakawachi is safe with a bunch of cannibalistic raiders. Not cannibals.

Good, it was Olycuch. I think better safe than sorry. Olycuch and Pamuk. Yes, Olycuch and Pam. Pamuk. They're still missing. Still missing. Can you by chance, you are a hunter, yes? Yes. You handle yourself in a fight. You came with us to the obsidian oath.

Obsidian oath. You came with us to their camp. We could find one of your other friends. I need to see Sakawatchi and Enuma and talk with them and see take counsel from them. I am maybe the muscle of that group, but I'm hardly that helpful. I'm shocked. We will though. It is written that we're not to help out in the actual adventure. Especially for an adventure built for four PCs and five of it.

Why are we arresting them? We just leave her. We should just leave this town. Just bring me back as if I'm a bottle that you found. Good luck getting back on your toes. If you find four bottles and pour them into your jersey chest, you win the adventure. You win the adventure. I found the Denigie bottle.

Don't drink me. Well Denigie, I see that you're not interested in role-playing We should get you back to suck what she's doing as possible yes, um absolutely um absolutely rest Yeah for a day we travel best at night So as the Sun rises we should rest and yes, I could I could help with the with the navigation I think I don't know wish Sakawaki Sakawachi was here he's not very helpful either he's with the cannibals then maybe I will be you I I trust you to take us back what are you doing with them? Turn her in. Who are going to follow us as well? Back to the camp? Well, until we get out of the immediate city.

No, no, no, you can't bring them back to Smiling Wolves. They're very dangerous. They're duplicitous. They made me feel as if they were welcoming me in and then the last thing I remember is they gave me a drink and I... What should we do then? Very well, we'll murder them. We'll murder them. No, no, I'm not saying we murder them. Will the Smiling Wolves murder them? Last thing I remember is they gave me a drink and I what should we do? With the smiling wolves murder them Absolutely, Matt. So you want to kill them on sight? I'm just saying if you take them back to camp they're dead right, but We agreed to lead them out of the city. So so are we can't be in two places at once is what I'm saying

Are we taking the bonds can the. Danigi, Danuji? I actually can. What's your? Danigi. Danigi. Do-ee-ji? Danigi? Danigi, it rhymes with Luigi.

Luigi? It rhymes with Luigi, I'm Danigi. Danigi. Yes. Dan-ay-ji. Are we taking Danigi back to the Smiling Wolf's Camp to meet Sokka-watchee, or are we going to the edge of the city?

Well, Smiling Wolf's Camp is in the city, so we could feasibly say, now just follow the stars and here's how you do it. And we can show them our way of navigating. Do we leave you alone? Perhaps you shouldn't bring them back to the camp. They would certainly annihilate them. I also can't return to the camp

until I find Hisso and bring him back. That's the whole reason why I was allowed to leave, to go with y'all. Very well, Barnes will take his kukri and just start stalking Turner and Hooch. Well, what are you doing? They're asleep. You said this was the only solution. No, I said we could lead them to the... Well Barnes will take his kukri and to start stalking turner nudge You said this was the only solution no I said we could lead them to the I think he's right kill them what? Let's just say they won't come and find us. Maybe there's others

What's the difference between y'all and them then don't watch please? I'm just joking on relax It's a hilarious joke. Sorry. maybe I'm just still high. I Just I fear for my life. I trust you if you are friends of Sakawatchi Whatever you decide to do. I will go with and why don't you come with us? where to the obsidian of the camp um, I Can was that we could we believe one of your companions may be there. Don't worry, we won't make you get involved in the combat.

All right. If anything happens to me, Sakawachi and Numa will never recover. I hope that Ulikuk and Pahmarca okay as well, and this group of mercenaries, they're safe there in that camp? This group of mercenaries, they're safe there in the- Oh, you mean Sakwatchi? We believe so, they seem to be... She is of their clan.

You don't want to return me there first, you want to go take out these... Raiders? More raiders? We can fight. Whatever you want. It's just. Mr. Pied, Mr. Pied. Whatever you want. It's just unnecessary travel. It can get lost. We pitched something here.

Yes. So while this discussion is happening, Buggles is like trembling outside the building because of Chami, because of the dog, and he just won't go in. And so this state of heightened fear so this like state of heightened fear in the state of heightened fear, the Kulu Khan takes the four sort of takes over while this discussion is happening. So the Kulu Khan like is not, has no fear of the dog and he comes inside and he hears

like probably no one is even noticing that this is happening. Everyone's so intent with this discussion. The K'uulukan goes over to the prisoners and just rips out one of their throats with his teeth. And we'll say that Chami, instinctively following the instincts of his master, does the same. I think even like he tells the dog to does the same. I think even like he tells the dog like to do the same. In an instant, Vogels and Chami are at the throats of uh, Trenuunooch. Vogels! Vogels! And you see them just both ripping out the larynx. They start screaming and their screams are choked with blood as they bleed out and all of you just stare at the carnage And we'll see you next week We haven't seen you do this yet Interesting. That cat might have been... Thank God. It's time to make your membership official.

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