The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 116 - Waterhouse-Five

Episode Date: August 15, 2017

The heroes must travel underwater in hopes of finding the remnants of an ancient submerged temple! For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on the Glass Cannon Podcast, the heroes dive deep beneath the surface. You guys go, just kind of let the weight take you down. This is so preposterous. It's a magical world. Where one false move... Oh no, Duster! Or one bad roll...

Holy crap! That roll, that die roll for a long time. It did, it did. It was a slow roll. Could mean the ultimate sacrifice. And if this is where Sir Will meets his end, I don't think it's so bad. So who will lead the way? Troy, if I've told you once,

I've told you a thousand times, Inquisitors gotta inquisit, so I'm gonna be up there. So Baron's in the back. I gotta inquisit the back. I wonder what's going on behind us. The adventure continues. Natural one.

Oh, no. No. This week on the Glass Cannon Podcast, Joe does the intro. Hey, what's going on, everybody? It's your old pal Joe here to welcome you to the latest installment of the Glass Cannon Podcast and, slightly less importantly, GenCon Week 2017. That's right. It is GenCon Week. We leave tomorrow for Indianapolis. I am ridiculously over-the-top excited, and I can assure you that excitement is completely genuine and is not filled at all with fear of the amount of stuff that I have to do.

I am so excited for this event. Truly, I can't even – we've been hyping it for weeks, obviously. I don't need to talk about it anymore. I'm sure those of you that are in are in. Those of you that are out, unfortunately, are out. But if you're out and you still might be in, there's going to be a lot of events this weekend in Gen Con. Live events, bar events, gaming events, you name it. We're doing it.

It's going to be crazy. I truly hope that all of us live through the weekend. If you are not in Indy this week and you happen to be in, say, I'm just going to throw a random location out here, Southern California, you can totally still hang with GCP fans and play some games. My cousin and one of my best buddies in the entire world, Steven Stagliano, is running a GCP fan event at Emerald Knights in Burbank, California, this Thursday, August 17th in the evening.

If you are interested in checking that out, go to eventbrite.com, search for Glass Cannon, you will find it there, RSVP, and go meet some people and play some games. It should be phenomenal. Speaking of GCP fans coming together, literally over a thousand of you now have united worldwide to donate to the show and help us get into a position to launch a second actual play podcast. We are so close to that milestone. If you haven't checked in on the Patreon recently, go check it out.

You'll see we are a sliver, a fraction of the way away from seriously going into production on a second podcast. So if you have not donated yet and you're willing to, if you're thinking about it and you're on the fence, now's the time. Head over to our Patreon. Check it out. Because once we hit that milestone, oh my God, we have to do a second show. And it is both extremely exciting to do another free show for everybody to listen to and partially terrifying,

but it does go to show how supportive our fans are. And I mean, there's no better feeling than that. So if you're right on the cusp there, if you're on the bubble, go check it out. Think about it. We're almost there. You guys, as for this week's episode, episode one 16, all I will say is it's one of those sessions that I love to play. It just has a little bit of everything and goes to show you how much fun you can pack

in to one hour of an RPG. That's why RPGs are the best. That's why we're going to Gen Con. So I've got to pack up. I'm on a flight tomorrow to Indy. Can't wait to see some of you there. Those of you who I miss, I will catch you next time. Please enjoy episode 116 of the Glass Cannon Podcast.

There was a pretty good point. I can't exactly pinpoint it when I go back and listen to last week's episode, where I was pretty sure you guys were just going to walk away and either go back and get Pembroke or just start running around yelling for Parisa.

Looking to the skies. Hello! Woman we've only heard about! Talking to every small creature they found in the woods. Like up to every vole. Are you a druid? Are you a druid? Are you a druid?

None of these characters know her. No? They don't even know she exists. They've heard stories. They don't even know she exists. They've all had those conversations. Lork told the story atop the dragon's den there. But man, yeah, underwater stuff is just wildly unpredictable and dangerous,

but it seems like water breathing is going to make it slightly less dangerous. At least you don't have to worry about drowning. The only reason you have to worry about drowning, even if you go unconscious, is if the spell wears out or gets dispelled. Then that could be bad news. But otherwise, you've just got to stay alive. I didn't even consider that an option.

If the spell got dispelled? A good dispel magic. P-K. What do you think happened here? In the image that you saw in the cave painting, beautiful city on a lake. They left the Paris Climate Accord. And this is the result.

Global warming happened, and they took their dumb castle into the water. A warning to us all. Certainly possible. I mean, clearly, yeah, this got submerged. Like, I don't know whether it sank beneath the lake. By destructive means, or... Or, yeah, or whether, like, the water levels rose.

Yeah, I mean, it could have over hundreds of years sunk, but it's also very... You don't think they would have built it there in the first place if the ground was not strong. Was it in... According to the paintings, was it already on an island in a lake? Yes. It was. It probably sank. It probably sank beneath the waves.

Maybe they built two more castles on top of it. Yeah. Oh, and Baron is also interested because we're not sure why. So he's just kind of detecting magic as we slowly walk every once in a while to see if anything strange is there that can be deduced. Roll a concentration check. Yeah, roll a concentration check.

And is that a first-level spell or a cantrip for you? It's a cantrip. Okay. So DC 15. But I'm water breathing. Yeah, you cast spells normally if you're water breathing. You're fine. It's no matter.

I just wanted to torture you. Yeah, that's one thing. I want to see you squirm. So let's say you didn't have water breathing. It's actually DC 15 plus the spell level, not double the spell level. But if you can breathe underwater, you can just cast spells as normal. Now, that doesn't mean that some spells won't have different effects than you expected.

I didn't prepare a lightning bolt, just FYI. Thank you. You cast it, everyone takes three, six bolts of electricity. So, you know, just focus on your speeds, know what your speeds are. Everybody moves at half speed. You cannot take a five-foot step at all. I'm sure someone's going to ask. I'm going to take a five-foot step. You what your speeds are. Everybody moves at half speed. You cannot take a five foot step at all. I'm sure someone's going to ask. I'm going to take a five foot step.

Can't do it. Underwater is considered difficult. So guaranteed combat. Yep. Shocking, right? And, but Della, you're going to be the one swimming, so you're going to have to roll Oh, you have a swim speed, so you're not going to roll swim checks unless you want to

Actually, if you move, what are you going to have, a ten foot? Ten foot swim speed, so you're not going to roll swim checks unless you want to... Well, actually, if you moved up, what are you going to have, a 10-foot? 10-foot swim speed. How long does monkey fish last? Only eight minutes. Oh. So I'd have to cast again if I wanted to maintain that swim speed. I see, I see. I'm sure this will only take eight minutes to explore an underwater temple.

Well, I can walk, too, so the monkey fish is better. To get us there, I want to have the monkey fish on. Right, right. Monkey fish. Huh. I just... Puppy monkey, baby. You don't want to have the monkey fish on to get out?

Well, that, too. But that's... You know, and you do both? Yeah. Okay. You just cast it multiple times. Yeah. Pro power.

Gotcha. Even though this falls into the category of Jurassic Park, i.e. great things that Troy doesn't like, right, one of the most infamous levels in all of video gaming history is the Water Temple in The Legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time. God, that Water Temple. And this already feels just as arduous as that. So enjoy the episode, everybody. God, the Water Temple. just as arduous. So enjoy the episode, everybody. I mean, I... God, the water temple.

I look at it, and do you ever get into an encounter or a situation in Pathfinder where you're like, this would be so much fun if I wasn't playing my character? Because if I imagine being a druid in here, it would be a blast!

What would you do if you were a druid? I would turn into a fish and explore the whole thing in two seconds. And then, like, yeah. Just an angler fish or something? Yeah. There's just so many cool... And if you were a wizard, you'd have so many fun options. Did you guys know that the Ash Peaks were mermen?

It's true. It's a little-known fact. I had a little sesh with a tenor offline. She let me know. By the way, you guys wade out there just in the middle of this lake and imagine you look to your left

and you're very far from the shore. You look to your right, very far, all around you. You see Lexington, he waves. Nice knowing you, Lexington. Yeah, never see him again. A drake comes down and grabs Lexington. knowing you, Lex. Yeah, never see him again. A drake comes down and grabs Lexington. Oh, no!

Lexington, no! Throws him in the air, catches him in his jaw. Play the horn! Play the horn! Rips him in two. All right, so... Open up the bag.

Explain to me, for those of you that are walking, what you do. You see the opening. Della has pointed it out. Now you can see it as well. Forty feet below. Do you guys just, like, jackknife straight down? blocking what you do you see the opening della is pointed out now you can see it as well 40 feet

below do you guys just like jackknife straight down yeah okay della will swim down della will swim down okay so you guys go just kind of let the weight take you down this is so preposterous but it's it's a magical world i can't imagine any of you have breathed underwater before. So you just go down and, like, you're breathing in and out, and it's working. So strange. That's got to be the weirdest sensation. Right? Hard to, like, open your mouth and breathe in water on faith.

It's the abyss. It's the abyss. Exactly, yeah. And you look up, and Della's just swimming behind you. And you guys get to the opening of what looks, well, as you're going down, these ruins consist of little more than great blocks of cut stone haphazardly toppled into piles of rubble. haphazardly toppled into piles of rubble. Only the unnaturally symmetrical cuts of the tremendous blocks,

worn smooth from the passing centuries and covered with a forest of algae, suggest that they were once part of ancient structures. This temple, Sir Will can see slight marks of religious iconography. This has got to be a temple. And it appears to be the only building in all the ruins that remains at least partially intact. Can I do a knowledge religion or is that pointless? Do I already know what it is?

I mean, you just feel like, temple. Temple. As if it was fated for you to find it. And you eventually get down to this opening, and you look in, and it's just dark up ahead. It's about... It's the nest areas now. I'm blind again.

Oh. 40, excuse me, 20-foot-wide opening leading in, and up ahead you can see into the temple. While it looks like it was originally much larger, you see rubble from whatever made it collapse, sealing the chambers up ahead, those of you with dark vision. And it looks like a maze. But before you lies

a vestibule. Nestor's frantically gesturing. He's like, light. Somebody make some light. That's right, you guys cannot communicate. You can't talk. What are you saying? Light. Della will cast light

on him. She'll swim over to Nestor and cast light on what you're wearing. She'll swim over the nester and cast light on what you're wearing. Well, I got my short sword out. She'll cast on the short sword. That gives her a thumbs up. Oh, awesome. Leave it to Siren's game.

That'll help Sir Will as well. Do you want your own lantern? Ooh. Della swims over to Sir Will and casts it on his on his life. I think you can only have one. Yeah, I think once you cast it on another object, it goes off. Whatever you wish to cast it on.

I don't have it, so I can't cast it for anyone. Wait, I might have a solution. Yep, I can cast it as a bard. Get out of here. There you go. Two separate light spells. Two separate fields of study.

Breaking the system. Awesome, so he's got it on the tip of his lance and it's up in front of him. This is just so ridiculous. It is so absurd. Ordinarily, I'd be worried about stealth, but, I mean, we're on... Whatever we fight,

we're going to be on their home ground anyway, so stealth is not going to be a viable option, so this is completely disastrous. Oh. I can't even begin to describe... I was saying to Troy that if things go bad for the rest of you, Della could always...

I was hoping Della might be able to shadow walk to a random location. Oh, yeah. See ya. Yeah. And if this is where Sir Will meets his end, I don't think it's so bad. A badass underwater temple. Yeah. No one will ever know, but it's pretty cool. Yeah. I mean... Well, if you get out.

Without water... Tell my story. Without water breathing, at least one of you had to die. There's no way it would work out any way besides definite death. But with water breathing, you least one of you had to die. There's no way it would work out any way besides definite death. But with water breathing, it definitely gives you a chance. There's no ticking clock. It's a lot less paperwork. Yes.

All right, up ahead lies what looks like a vestibule. Great blocks hedge in the walls of this room, sealing it from the outside. hedge in the walls of this room, sealing it from the outside. As you approach it, little lake minnows dart briskly through the cracks in the walls that pass you like a little school of minnows. And you can see that the floor in the room

is covered with small indentations filled with, like, silt, detritus, and pebbles. Hmm. You guys are all outside of the chamber. 20-foot-wide opening. Looks like it's about 20 feet long to get into that first. I'm going to do a perception check. Let's see if there's anything notable.

Seventeen. Unless there's a trap. Seventeen. You can see what looks like bones lying among the silt. Oh, boy. Giant bones.

Oh. Giant? Oh, wow. Do they look like bleached, like very old, super clean? Very, very old. Yeah. Okay. Worn by the passage of time and the water flowing over them.

What do you do? Can I do a knowledge local check to determine the approximate size of the giant? Sure. Yeah, me too. Damn, I can never get a fun roll. 23. 23. You'd have to get more into the room to really acknowledge it,

but you'd say probably 10, 12, 15 feet. One of the normal sizes that we usually see. I'll take the lead. Go in. Della will swim alongside. Okay. Place yourselves on the Mondo mat, which I finally am getting to use.

Yeah, that's awesome. Oh yeah, this is big. Alright, so talk to me about this group here. Nestor's up front with Della, and then behind them is Baron, and then in the back is Willie and UMS. Yep. And Troy, you tell is Willie and UMS. Yep.

And Troy, you tell me when you think eight minutes has passed so I know that I'm not swimming. Okay, hold on. Okay, it's passed. We were at 7.58. 7.58. I mean, in all honesty, though, did you cast it before you went down? Yeah. All right, so I'd say about four minutes has passed at this point.

Okay. I mean, it's not the big... She also is encumbered enough that she could... Walk along the boat. Walk with a steady hand. The main thing you've got to remember is, if you're moving and you're encumbered, it's half speed.

Double move is full round action. All right, so... Yeah, you just see this room up ahead, and you can see that beyond this room, it splits off to the right, it splits yeah, you just see this room up ahead, and you can see that, you know, beyond this room, it splits off to the right, splits off to the left, and you can just see that whatever's left of this temple is just a maze of ruins. Is our vision somehow... Occluded?

Yeah, because, like, seeing underwater is not... Not super easy, right? Yeah, so the way it works is like it depends on the water's clarity. We'll say that this is clear water and not murky water. You can see 48 times 10 feet if the water's

clear. You can see 220 feet. Yeah, we're fine. Those of you who can actually see. Can I take a closer look at this rubble here at the entrance? Sure. Okay. 24.

24. Closer look at the rubble. Yeah, just these fish nests, they look like, are surrounded by bones, but you can't tell actually, you can pretty much be certain that these bones were probably laid to rest here, and over time have just floated about through the

current and settled in these fish nests. Interesting. So, I'm going to move past. I'm going to start walking out of the room. Okay. And roll another perception check. All right.

What's everybody else doing? Del is swimming alongside. 29. 29. Okay. Del is swimming alongside Nestor. The rest in the back. She has fish fins, by the way.

Fish fins. Fish fins. Monkey fish. Nestor, you hear up ahead a rush of water. And signal, stop. Point at the noise. And around the corner, and you will get the jump on them, Nestor, a creature that, you know, I looked for an image online

for this creature there's a lot of different ones but I thought it would be most appropriate to show one from our own tumblr because many episodes ago someone fought this creature someone fought it bravely but around the corner

comes Gar Brooks a giant roll for initiative But around the corner comes... Is it Gar? Gar Brooks? Gar Brooks! A giant... Oh, it is! Oh, man! Roll for initiative! That didn't take long. Man.

The near death of Glamorous. Oh, come on! Oh, that's huge. Look at the size! Roll, record, roll. Roll, record, roll. Roll, record, roll. Roll, record, roll.

Roll for initiative! Cool. Oh, man. Joe said before the show, he was like, I think by the end of this episode we'll have moved 20 feet into the room. Alright, what do you got, Nestor? 21. 21, alright, and

a surprise round. Sir Will? 8. 8, okay. Della? 10. It's a gentlemanly roll. Della, you know your rolls aren't affected by water, right? We're having fun. Baron? Baron has a 24.

Nestor, you had 21? Yeah. Okay, and Umlo. Umlo has a seven. Oh, you're Umlo! I'm Umlo. All right, so Umlo, sir, will just be Umlo. Surprise round.

I'm only giving it to Nestor because he had asked for that perception check before he came in. Nestor, you hear this thing. You get to jump on it. What is it, 20 feet away from you? Is it? This is a huge creature, by the way. 30, I think. Oh, it's farther.

Yeah, it's farther. So it's standing at the entrance to the rest of this temple. What are you doing? Shit. Diplomacy. Great sound. I'm going to ready an action. If it comes within striking range,

I'm going to stab. Okay. And by the way, Nestor hates not having old Jolta. He hates it. I can't imagine. I've never seen him fight without it. Yeah, he knows how lethal he is with it and without it, he's just fairly ordinary. He hates it. I can't imagine. I've never seen him fight without it. Yeah, this is like, he knows how lethal he is with it.

And without it, he's just fairly ordinary. And he hates this more than anything. This is going to be wild. All right, so ready's an action to slash if it comes at him. Round one. Bam. Are we going to assume that because I said I'm using the crossbow underwater that I've been carrying it this whole time, are you going to make me spend a full round to load it?

Your choice. You just strive loading it. Okay. So I have my loaded crossbow in my hands, and I move. Okay. No, it's up to you. No, no, no, it's fine. Tell me, Troy.

We've joked about the walking around with a loaded crossbow before, but that's fine. You certainly mentioned it last episode. If you wanted to switch to the hand axe now, then I'd be like, all right, you get to draw your weapon. Yeah, that's fine. You're ready for danger. And I'm just getting in. My action will be if he gets in the melee range with any of my companions, I will shoot at him. Melee range, you'll shoot at him.

Now, he's a huge creature, but you're kind of tucked back there behind your foe, so he's going to get a little bit of a bonus there. Plus, he already gets the bonus for every five feet that arrow. Right, that's why I'm waiting for him to get closer. I'm waiting for him to get a little closer. Close-up. Nestor, you're waiting for this thing to come to you, and you still have the jump on him. It's your turn.

Still, again, ready to action. All right, well, get ready to use them, because the giant, the giant gar just swoops in. Let me just check on the reach situation. Oh, 15 feet of reach. Oh, fuck.

For his mouth? 15 feet of reach. Makes no sense whatsoever. That makes zero sense. Well, look at his body. But we could hit his body. It doesn't have hands. That makes zero sense. Well, look at his body. But we could hit his body. But we could hit it. Right, right. We could hit his... It doesn't have hands.

Yeah. Baron, did you roll a knowledge? Oh, this is so silly. Strike like a snake. All right, so who's up front? Della and Nestor. I'm going to roll a d20. One through ten goes after Nestor.

Eleven through twenty, it attacks Della. Five on the die. With my aquatic D20. Looks like a celestial. No less. It goes to bite. Swallow. Oh, no.

We're all going to be in the belly of this thing. 24 to bite Nestor. Oh, boy. Oh, no, Nestor! Bites Nestor for... Oh, boy. Imagine, look, Nestor! Bites Nestor for... Oh, boy. Just imagine. Look at the jaws on this thing.

Look up a picture of a real guard. They're pretty accurately described, just not as mythical. 19 points of damage. Oh, Jesus. And attempts to grab Nestor with a 29. That is...

Yeah, I am grabbed. That's actually 32. So it grabs Nestor in his jaws. Pulls him to him. And it is Della's turn. Della, you just see Nestor go, gets pulled away from you. In the jaws of his mighty Mabel. Well, wait, now that I'm in melee range, can I...

You know what? That satisfies the condition. I'll totally allow that. Yep. Okay. You're obviously going to just put the... Actually, you should have gotten a hit before it attacked you. Well, no, because that 15 feet reach.

Oh, that's right. Now, Nestor, just throw on the grappled condition, and it'll do all the math for you. In terms of your... And then, I don't know if there's an underwater thing. If you're not using a piercing weapon, just remember it's minus two and half damage. But you got normal. Yeah, all right.

This is tough. Ah, 31. 31? Yes. Holy shit, that's a hit? Yes. Wow. Oh, fuck.

Three points of damage. Three points of damage. Nesser just slashes at this thing. Stab at it right in its eye. It's coming at me. It grabs me. Alright, Della, what do you got? Della's going to swim up ten feet and then cast Frostbite.

And not spell college. She's just going to attempt to touch the gar. Nice. Okay, so you're going to attempt to cast... All right, so roll for the touch attack. All right. Sorry, I'm looking for my touch bonus. Okay.

19. Sorry. I'm looking for my touch bonus. Okay. 19. 19 is a hit. Yes. Ice to see you. So Frigid Touch is 46 of cold damage. Nice. Wow. Okay.

Did I say Frostbite? Because I was talking about Frigid Touch. Frigid Touch. Frigid Touch. Exploding dice. 16 points of cold damage, and you are staggered for a round. Yeah. Wow. Amazing. Nice. Okay, staggered is

I can take a single move or a standard action, but not both, and I cannot take a full round action. I'm going to call this guy Mrs. Pauls because he's a frozen fish. Yeah. All right. How much damage did you say? I'm sorry? 16 points of damage.

16. Oh, my gosh. It would take me about 20 rounds to deal 16 points of damage. to deal 16 points of damage. And remember, where it's grappling, even though it is the grappler, it also has the grapple condition, so it lowers its AC, makes it a little bit easier. And I'm assuming it couldn't take an attack of opportunity

when I closed. Unless it has multiple attacks, like fins or something. Well, I mean, it hasn't used its attack of opportunity yet, but it is not going to release Nestor. So, although it doesn't know its name is Nestor. Sir Will. Sir Will will take a full round action to move 10 feet toward the creature. All right.

Boom. Just pushing, pushing. Just like a rule trying to get up there. Oh, I move so slow and I'm so tiny. I love this underwater effect on the music. That's really neat, by the way. So good. Umla. Umla's going to move

within 15 feet of distance to, I kind of sound like Lork, um, uh, of the, is that close enough? I'm always confused with reach. Am I good there? You're good. Okay, so he's going to reach out with hot spit and say, creatures of

the land, creatures of the sea, all must fear. I'm loud. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. That's all I need. Ooh, not natural 18. Yeah. Wow. That is a hit. And this is 2d6. Is this a giant subtype?

Because it's a giant car. Ah, no. Four. What is his bonus? Plus four. Plus four. Eight points of damage. But then...

Okay. Eight points of damage. It's piercing. Is that piercing? Yeah. It is. Great. This is why you had to bring UMS along.

So UMS just harpoons at you. Yeah. Oh, it's work-ups. If I ever crit on this thing, it would be amazing! It's right between Della and Nestor just like stabbing. Round two. Alright. No one has died yet. Baron, you've just loaded

crossbow. You see Umlo just walk up and stab at the mighty mammal. Mammal? Definitely not. The mighty avian. So I'm 15 feet away and shooting through

the largest arachnid we've ever faced arm yourselves I've never seen a marsupial this large so check it out that's gonna get it's one two three

four spaces away that's a plus eight to its AC and you're shooting through someone so it has partial cover so plus ten to its AC impossible I'm not gonna shoot at it has partial cover. Plus ten to its AC. I'm not going to shoot at it. I'm going to do a knowledge

nature on him. He's deadly. Yes. Knowledge nature, 19 points. 19 points. 19 points? You mean 19. 19 points of knowledge about nature in regards to this guy.

That's going to give you one piece of information. And the only piece of information that's even important is that this thing can swallow whole on the next round with Nestor. Maybe you've heard stories. Actually, no. Galavris wouldn't have been able to tell anyone what happened. They don't even know about Benverine. So this is important information that you don't have, Grant. Baron says.

And it was the last words Nestor ever heard. Put it on his tombstone. Bubble, bubble. Bubble. Bub. I hope he does swallow me, because I'm excited to attack him from the inside. Yeah, it is fun. Oh, he will.

Don't worry. I don't think he got enough laughs out of that. That was pretty funny. It was funny. Thank you. We've got to get distracted. Troy, you're supposed to tell us when your jokes are funny, right? I'm worry. I don't think he got enough laughs out of that. That was pretty funny. I thought it was good. It was funny. Thank you. We've got to get distracted. Troy, you're supposed to tell us when your jokes are funny, right? I'm sorry. I can't do everything.

We had a deal. We had a deal. Time to swallow a hole. All right, so plus 20 to the attempt to maintain the grapple. Oh, boy. All right, so Natty's 17. Yep. So it swallows Nestor whole.

Goon gone. And he takes, oh boy, 15 points of bludgeoning damage. Oh my god. And is inside the creature. Let me walk you through this, because we didn't take time. You know, Nestor doesn't know about this. I only told Glabrous. Being swallowed causes a creature to take damage each round.

That's going to be that 2d6 plus 10 bludgeoning damage every round. A swallowed creature keeps the grappled condition while the creature that did the swallowing does not. So I am no longer grappled. A swallowed creature can try to cut its way free with any light slashing or piercing weapon. The amount of damage required for the creature to cut itself free, well, I know what that is.

Or it can just attempt to escape the grapple. This is not something we mentioned before. So you can try to cut yourself free or attempt to escape the grapple even though you're in its mouth. You'd be like prying its jaws open and getting out. That's cool. And if you

do cut yourself free, it cannot swallow a hole until the damage is healed, which could save everyone's life. You know how we were just talking about how we all learned how to mitigate falling damage after the death of our dear Jerk Ormly? Right. Orphos, who's dead now, but

the enchantment I put on Zeal Shaker's armor was the Bitter Condition, which makes them roll a Fortitude Saver. They have to spit you out. Oh, that's fun. Yeah, it was fun, but he's dead. He's dead. And he also never got the chance to speak with Calabras.

Right. So you're a dirty cheater. Yep. All right. Nestor. So I'm very much battered, bloodied, per the D&D 4-E rules. He's going to stab. Trying to hack his way out from the inside of this great fish.

22. 22. Even with a minus two to attack, he cuts into the flesh of the fish. Seven points of damage. Seven points of damage. Seven points of damage. And second attack. So they're hit. And four more points of damage.

And you cut yourself out. Yeah! Oh my god! Yep. Lost my way out of the belly. The belly of Jonah. Like if Jonah had a short sword plus one. So where does he emerge? He emerges right next to it. So like outside of its mouth. All right, so Nestor cuts his way off.

Not too shabby. Wow. Okay. And it is Delos' turn. Like Boba Fett coming out of the Sarlacc pit. Extended universe, still a hill. And Chorra being birthed from the rhinoceros. Can Delos do a knowledge check

to see what would happen if she were to cast Shocking Grasp? Let me just pause all the action here. I mean, you could do knowledge Arcana, but I don't even know. I've no idea. I mean, I was looking up and apparently there is a mechanic for it underwater. But anyway, that's what I was seeing, if there was something.

It's my call. Call it. Well, can I roll the knowledge check? Cast the knowledge to know what happens. Well, can I roll the knowledge check? Yeah, roll the knowledge check? Cast knowledge to know what happens. What can I roll the knowledge check? Yeah, roll a knowledge check. Knowledge arcana. 21.

There's a good chance it'll affect everyone within 10 feet, because I just decided that. And by good chance, you mean almost certainly. This is one of those classic GMs call. This is also what happens when a character invests heavily in, like, metamagic feats to make a certain spell great. They don't want to not prepare it because they're underwater. They just want to have it all the time. Totally.

Well, that would only affect Umlo. Right? And Nestor. And me, yeah. And you. And you are chaotic evil. I have energy resistance. You are filled to the brim with the soul of a demon.

I have 37 hit points left. I'll do Frigid Touch again. Spell Combat, Spell Strike. With the Star Knife. Oh, nice. So ridiculous. Nice. It's Calabras coming through there.

Yeah, man. Oh, you were staggered last round. Could you swallow a hole? Oh. Yeah, it's a standard action. Okay, you're staggered again. Come on. Let's see how much.

There you go. 15. 15 plus 1d4 for the Stardust. Nice. 19 points of damage. You rolled max damage on the Stardust? Yeah. Galabras is really with you.

That knife was there. Second attack. Revenge of the Gar. Finally. Revenge of the Gar. First attack with the Starnife. Miss. Okay.

Second attack with the Starnife. It's not your go-to weapon. 18. So 27. That is a hit. 25. Four points of damage. Four points again.

Wow. All right. That knife is awesome. Four points again. Wow. All right. That's awesome. I mean, if you don't think about that, though, this is Galabras' weapon, and it's striking true. Yeah. And you don't add strength or dex bonus to it because you're not trained in it? Yeah. Well, my strength bonus is plus zero.

Okay. Sir Will. Sir Will. Della is messing this thing up. Nestor just cut himself out the side of it. And Sir Will's like, I want to help so bad. He just goes another ten feet. It must be exhausting.

You're dragging 50 pounds of armor through. I'm coming. Umlo. Umlo is going to take what he hasn't done in quite some time, which is a full round attack action on this guy. And he says, I'm going to make shish kebabs out of you, mate. Spearfish. Bubble, bubble.

That's a miss. First one is a miss. Second one is 18. Does that hit? That is a miss. Dang. All right. Dang.

Dang. Dang, dog. That's a word I can never make work. All right, so... Dang. Dang. Dang, dog. That's a word I can never make work. Dang. All right, round three. So far, so good. Della is just slicing and dicing, making sushi over there. Not slicing.

Stabbing. Piercing, stabbing, and dabbing. Baron. Cam Newton. Baron's going to move ten feet closer. So now he is a simple square away. Okay. That will provoke.

All right, attack me. So it goes to bite Barone. And it take an attack of opportunity when staggered. Is it still staggered? Yeah, it staggered it again. Oh, right, you said it again. It staggered it again. A creature. It staggered. It can take a right, you said it again. It staggered it again. Creature.

You can take a single move or a standard action each round. It doesn't say he can't, but it would make sense that he cannot. So, Baron, you're good. No, I think we did this before. Not to do this on Baron, but I think that... Oh, he can still take free swift or immediate actions. You can do... Attack of Opportunity is an immediate action. You can do an immediate action whenever you can do a free action.

Okay, if it's an immediate action, then he can 19 to hit, Farron. That is a miss, miss, miss. All right, so it costs half to try to bite you. Nothing. And he says, I don't have my gun. I feel a little unpowerful, but here you go. Oh, that's probably going to be a miss. So that is minus two right now.

Why is it minus two? Because I'm 5'0". Because underwater. Underwater. Yeah, I'll add that to my now. Why is it minus two? Because I'm five feet away. Because it's underwater. Underwater. Yeah, just, I'll add that to my AC. Okay, got it, got it, got it. So it is an 18 to hit, then. It's a plus two for every five feet. No, but the minus two to hit is underwater. Yeah, yeah. That's for sure, and then I get the bonus.

Okay, then it's the 16. 16's a miss. So Bamish just, poof! Thing just, blububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububububub So Baron's just... Wait, did you reload? No, I never shot. Now I have to take an entire turn to reload. You're going to be in its stomach with that crossbow. Alright, so it's going to take a five foot step back as I hit Joe in the face. Five foot step, I mean a five foot swim back.

A five foot paddle. And it's going to attack either Baron or Della. Let's bring out the Aquatic D20. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Who's It Gonna Kill? First up is Della with a 1 to 10, followed by Baron with an 11 to 20. It's gonna be Della Narn with another 5.

This has been Aquatic D20. Do you have a light slashing weapon on you? I'm, I'm sorry, but it's not going to help. It slashes. It can't swallow a hole again because nests are cut out. But it can just rain down damage. I'm rolling in front of the table here. Natural one!

Natural one! Oh, no. You've got to be kidding me. Confirm. Confirm it. Confirm it. No, not confirmed. Just a miss.

You're a bad GM. Shit. Okay. Shit. Son of a B. Nestor. Yeah, I'm going to do a full attack again. That's what sucks when you have one creature.

You just want to do some stuff and then... Yeah, I'm going to do a study target to make sure. Oh, that's what fishes look like. And that is a hit. And four more points of damage. So Nestor just slicing at this thing scant. Stab it away. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.

Oh, that's a miss. It misses with the second one. And Della. Della's thing just came within inches of your face. With its big jaws. Can I take a five-foot step if I have a swim speed of ten? You cannot. So I've got to take a move action to get up in it.

It's real. We should provoke, I'm assuming. It already used its attack of opportunity. Great. So Della will move up and... I'm sorry, real quick. What was the difference between it taking a five-foot step and Della taking a five-foot step? Oh, that's right.

I didn't even think about that. So if it did that, then we would get attacks of opportunity. If it doesn't have a five-foot step. Yeah. Since Della has a swim speed, she would get one. All right, so do you get... If you can swim, I think so. I don't know why you wouldn't.

You're at home in the water. Okay. Sure, I'll let you do that, Della. Yeah, okay, Della, we'll take a five-foot step and then Spell Combat Spellstrike with the Star Knife. Okay, where you have a swim speed, that's totally cool, because I did it with my creature. Great. We'll wait for the emails

to tell us how it works. Sure, sure, don't worry, no problem. Full round action. First, casting Spellstrike. I need to do Concentration. I automatically get it, because it's a DC 15. Okay. And then... Just to cast defensively. Yeah. Okay. And then here's

roll to hit with the spell. Natural 1. Natural 1! Roll to confirm. Confirm. Come on. Natural 1! Oh! Fan! Fan! I think if you do two natural ones in a row, you immediately take 30 points of damage. That's what it said in the...

I think you cut off your own hand. Look it up. Look it up. I'm pretty sure that's the house rule. So what is this? Is it a piercing fumble? With a spell. Is it the spell fumble?

Yeah, that's a good question. You want to roll die for it, or do you want to call it? Wait, so what'd you try to do? You tried... Spell combat spell strike with the star knife. But this is the first action. All right, so I get to pick. Instead of you picking, I'll pick.

Hmm. I mean, I kind of want to do magic, because that's always wild. All right. Let's do magic fumble. It's going to kill us all. We got submitted so many magic fumbles. Oh, man. Amazing.

I hope it's... Roll... Drowning. Roll two d20s. Two d20s. And add the result. Because we have, what, 40? Yep. If you cast water breathing, it's... Roll 2d20s. 2d20s. And add the result. If you cast Water Breathing, it's dispelled. 12.

I'm kind of worried something like this is going to happen. Okay. Oh my god. Andrew from Pittsburgh comes in with Human Missile. Now you have to understand, when you cast magic and it goes awry, crazy things happen. Oh god. You are propelled up to

30 feet in a random direction dealing 1d6 per caster level fire damage to yourself and anything you collide with will negate. Will negate. Jesus Christ.

Why did we accept that? 1d6 per casual. So that would be 8d6? 8d6 to me and anything I touch? To you and anything you collide with. Oh, come on. You could collide with him. Come on. So the will save is my AC, right? Yes.

The will save is his AC. I almost want to give you my bottle cap. I thought you were going to try and touch a lot. You got it. Oh, yeah, 23. You're fine. You're fine. Holy crap.

That die rolled for a long time. It did. It was a slow roll. Does the will save negate the damage and the blast back? Yeah, it just negates. It negates the whole thing. It would be kind of fun if it blew you out of there, but you didn't do fire. Holy moly.

So is my knife still charged? I think so. I never touched it. Oh, wait, but if it... It never went off. Well, because you negated, I think. The spell, I mean, you fumbled. The spell was still cast.

I fumbled on the attack. Oh, I gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. So... Yeah, the spell technically didn't discharge, so I think you're still charged. Great. Okay. Um, and here's the first attack. There you go.

24. That is a hit. This has gotta do it. Okay, so you're gonna take, uh, 1d6.8 points of non-lethal cold damage, and you're fatigued. Oh, jeez. Plus the star knight facility. So, 12 points of non-lethal cold damage and you're fatigued. Plus the start of the episode. So, 12 points of non-lethal damage. And it's dead!

Oh! Adela tries to cast a spell and you felt like something really bad was about to happen. But you willed yourself through it. Like, I can do this! I'm a sand city in the water! With Galabras in your mind's eye, you just slice through and kill the gar. Nice.

So she fooled. Alright. You are out of combat. I'm in bad shape. Is the gar a fish or a reptilian? Fish. Okay. Sir Will has just arrived. He's ready to attack. What can I do? He's gonna roll

to hit with the spear. Sir Will will beckon Nestor to come down to him, and he can lay on hands. Nestor kind of limps over. Sir Will's like... And you touch his lay on hands, and you heal 12 points. Excellent. Wow. So, Sir Will, in a sacred place, dedicated to Minderhall, as you know.

It's still working. It's still working. I'm taking this as a good sign. That is a pretty good sign. Quite literally. Yeah. Are you still down? Oh, yeah.

Would you still like healing? I could use some. Baron will reach out with the power of Toreg to give you a little cure. Light. Loot. Ooh. Exploding dice. oh 10 10 points i feel much better oh great all right i'll take my gar back this was much better when you guys were like seven six level yeah big difference

big difference uh took it down Took it down a level. It's also a lot more fun when it's just against one cleric. Yes, much easier. Five level 9 creatures. One cleric and one celestial wolverine. Right, that's right. Anybody want to buy a used gar? Tom Exposition, you're down here?

All right, so up ahead you see a corridor going to the left, going to the right. Which way are we going, Della? Who does what? Let's go to the right. So you're going to swim into the hallway without looking, right? Needlessly. No perception? No, I will do a perception when I get to the threshold.

Okay, so Della gets to this T intersection. And probably doesn't see anything. And closes her eyes and moves into the area. 13 on the perception. 13 on the perception. You don't really see anything. What you can just tell is that to your right, it looks like the corridor wraps around to continue deeper into the temple. And there's also a chamber far off to the right.

to continue deeper into the temple, and there's also a chamber far off to the right. To your left, there's rubble from fallen stones that used to make up maybe this temple or another building, and then there's a small little opening that leads you deeper into the temple that way. Since we're in a magical temple as well, I'd like for Baron, in each room he goes into, to do a check for unusual stonework.

Or secret doors. So you're going to enter as well? Yes, please. Airtight chamber. Both of you guys need to get in the corridor. 32 or 34 for unusual stonework.

You do not see any unusual stonework. However, I'm going to give you this bit of knowledge. Where Della's perception wasn't quite good, you do notice interesting stonework. In the chamber to the far right is some sort of stone structure with a series of like... Concentric circles. It's a CBS logo. Bless Moonverse.

It appears to be some sort of structure of concentric circles, but you can't quite see what else is going on in there. So you basically have three different options. You've got that chamber. I agree. You've got the passage

leading deeper in that's next to that chamber, and you've got the passage to the left that also leads in deeper in. Let's pull a Matthew and reach for that low-hanging fruit. Aw. Let's cut that out. Jeez. So mean-smeared. That's not what I was in Boston.

Everyone was like, you're so mean to Matthew. Why is everyone so mean to Matthew? And it's like, I don't know. Because he can't fight back. He can't fight back. It's more fun than making fun of everyone else. Because he's a pacifist. I'd like my previous statement stricken from the record.

The last time you asked for that, I pleaded guilty. By the way, now that you guys, Della and Baron, have entered into the chamber, you notice that the silt

and sand and dirt underneath you is kicking up with every step, providing concealment any time you walk on the ground. Oh, neat. Interesting. Okay. Alright, so, yeah.

What do you guys want to do? I'll, uh, Nesta points at the circles on the ground. That looks good to me. That's where Sir Will wants to go to. He wants to get to this prayer as soon as possible, and that looks magic-y. So we'll see. Will Sir Will get there in 25 minutes? Yeah possible and that looks magic-y. So we'll get there in

25 minutes? Yeah, so I just need 30 mats. Yeah, I agree. Nestor picks them up and carries them like a baby. He's heavy. A big metal baby. A big 50-pound iron-clad toddler. I turn on Righteous Might.

Alright, so you guys want to begin walking into that chamber with the circles? Yes. Yeah, I bet. All right, as you pass by the other entryway leading deeper into the chamber, you can see that it opens up into a huge room with other rooms as well. Oh, gosh. Dang. But you guys all move in to... He just shoved us all into this room. up into a huge room with other rooms as well. Oh, no. Gosh dang. But you guys all move in to... He just shoved us all into this room.

He put us right in the circle of death. Now that you get close, you see this odd stone structure that looks like a set of terraced rings stacked from largest to smallest, just standing in the

center of this room. Inside of the rings lies a pile of smooth, polished stones, covered with dead leaves and sticks. Huh. I'm going to assume Del's monkey fish is worn off by now. Monkey fish

is no more. Sir Will would like to test the paladin power. He wants to see if he has the first level ability to detect evil at Will. So he wants to detect evil on the circle. At Will? At himself.

And Della and Nestor. Yeah. So if Della and Nestor don't light up, he knows he does not have the ability to detect evil. If they do and there's nothing on the circle, that just means there is no evil in the circle. It's a control test. Yes, exactly. You two stand there. There we go.

Right. You go to detect evil and you do see a faint glow off of each of them. You do not see the same glow coming off of this circle of stones. Okay. This is awesome. What are you looking at me like? Pay no attention. Sir Will, do a perception

on the circle? Sure. Any particular dangers? Yeah, I'm going to do the same thing. Will, you don't sense any danger. 22. And yeah, Nestor, you feel pretty safe. Nestor still is clearing

the brush leaves. Sir Will does the same. So you're moving everything away and it appears to be you know very purposefully put here. The sticks or the stones? The stones.

The stones seem to be here for a reason. Are they... The stones are not the concentric circles. There's some stones in the... Yeah, circles going up from largest to smallest, and within there are a bunch of stones. Detect magic on the stones. Baron goes to detect magic,

and you do not detect any magic. I'm going to examine one of the stones. You pick it up. It's very smooth. It fits in the palm of your hand. But you otherwise have no idea. I'm going to save it

for skipping purposes later. Della's going to grab a couple. Della grabs a couple. Anybody else do anything? Sir Will is going to look around the walls to see if there are any markings, any religious markings or anything like that on the crumbling walls. Is there a knowledge check we could do on the stones? Yes, there is.

You can roll a knowledge religion. Touch a law? Do you want it? I have no bonus, so no. Okay. Thirteen. Thirteen. You don't know.

Bering, I'll also go with thirteen. Let's take them all. Yeah, we start clearing them off. We can always show them to somebody who does know their thing. Yeah, it's a pile of them, there's probably a dozen, two dozen But yeah, you can't quite see the significance And so, Will, you're looking around You can kind of see there might have used to been etchings on the wall here But they've been rubbed so much by both time and water

You can't quite tell There is some sort of religious significance to this But none of you know. And there's nothing underneath the stones after we... No. There's no markings on the circles or anything, right? Or are those the markings you're talking about? No, the markings were on the wall.

Okay. I guess we think of a gravestone where people leave a memorial, like a rock on top of the gravestone. Could it have been a pyre or something? I did misspeak slightly. You do detect a very, like a rock, like on top of the gravestone. Could it have been a pyre? I did make a slight... I did misspeak slightly. You do detect a very, very, very faint

evocation aura. Can I spellcraft that evocation aura? Um... No. No. This is tied into the divine. Got it, got it, got it. Shall we head to the big chamber? Yeah. In that direction, I think.

Okay, yeah. Nothing else in here. Slowly but surely. You come out of that room, and you take a right, and you go into what appears to be the Great Hall, or what remains of it in this temple. It's the largest room that you've seen so far in the temple ruins, and obviously you haven't been that far in,

but anybody with even the slightest knowledge of dungeoneering would know that this is probably the largest room here. The western wall has completely collapsed and now consists of a pile of great stone blocks. Lake fish dart around the rubble and through the fallen stones. Lakefish dart around the rubble and through the fallen stones. In the center of the room, to the east, a short flight of stone stairs rises to a small stone dais. You see in the back of the room two openings that lead deeper into the temple,

one directly across from you, one towards, like, southeast. Also on the other side of the dais, you see another opening into another room, and then if you look to your left, it wraps around into the room that would lead you back where you guys came,

but you didn't, when you came out, you went to the right, you didn't go to the left. Well, to your left now, you see there's another entrance into another antechamber that would then lead you back out to where you were before. So there's a lot of different options, but now you are in a very, very large room. Still, kicking up silt as you walk.

Sir Will just gestures with his Highbury Lance to the dais and just starts approaching it. Can I roll Perception? Sure, yeah. Yeah, can I roll perception? Yeah, let's do that. I believe it as well. 23.

24. 28, 30 for stone. Yeah, from where you are, way in that back corner, nothing of interest besides the dais. You feel like if you get deeper into the room, then you'll be able to kind of do perception into those other three or four

rooms if you wanted to. Gotcha. Yeah, I'll... Sir Will just wants to walk to the dais and up the steps and onto the dais if he's not interrupted on the way. Alright, Sir Will walks over to the dais. And Nestor will follow about 15 feet behind.

Walks up the stairs and you see an ancient giant skeleton lying atop the dais. Awesome! And the only thing of interest on what's left of these remains

is an elaborately wrought golden headband. Nice. Ooh. Okay. is an elaborately wrought golden headband. Nice. Ooh. Ooh. Okay. I'll do a knowledge local on the giant skeleton just to get a sense of what it might have been. That failed. And then I will detect evil on the headband.

Detect evil on the headband. You do not detect any evil. 23 on the knowledge local for Della. 23 on the headband. Detect evil on the headband. You do not detect any evil. 23 on the knowledge local for Della. 23 on the knowledge local. It appears to be the body of probably a slag giant based on the size and the markings. Okay.

Maybe it was Rosag herself. Huh. Yeah. Can Della kind of climb up the skeleton to get the gold amulet off it? Well, that's what Sir Will's doing. He's going to take that amulet. With your 50 pounds of... Well, she's laying on the ground, right?

Yeah, she's like the body's laying. Sir Will goes down, reaches for the headband. And the skeleton doesn't come to life. Ah! We're having fun. Della, you were up on the dais there with Sir Will? No, I came up thinking that I would have to climb it, but it was on the ground. I'm grabbing the rear.

And Nestor, you came deeper into the room as well. Yeah, I'm standing at the base of the stairs. And Baron, so you're there with Baron and Della, pretty much. And Baron and... So you're there with Baron and Della, pretty much. Yeah, yeah. Nestor, Umlo, and Baron roll a perception check. Actually, Sir Will as well.

Natural one. 26. 22. 26, 22. 24 if it's done. Is it a stone giant fish? Is it... Made of stone. Baron, you see up ahead past the dais,

but in the direction of where Sir Will is, so to the east. In that next room is a stone statue surrounded by two tall menhirs. Nestor, you see, straight ahead of you

to the right, in that other room, glimmering coin. And a lot of it. There's all sorts of shit there. That's what you see. So Will's like, which way does he go oh can

I'm literal to 23 yep so I'm low sees what Baron sees so sir well does he get any indication of magical resonance or anything off of this headband he does not okay he's going to take it, and he wants to hold onto it just in case it's like a relic of this rose egg. Okay, he just puts it in his pouch.

He ties it to his belt. You want to open the watertight patches. Right. While you don't feel any magic from it, you feel an intense religious connection to it and as he takes it he's saying a prayer

to Iomedi to his god Minderhall he's not trying to loot the place he's trying to understand what happened here and who these people are and if there is some reasonable side of Minderhall and Minderhall worship that is not bound to just kill all the small folk of the world.

And as you bring this thing up to you to put it in, you do notice one little image of the symbol of Minderhall. It's changed. It's not the one that you've seen in the cathedral. It's even older than that. An archaic image of Vendor Hall. Yes. And you look at that and pray to Iomadai. You have to pray to Iomadai.

We're remembering. For that. That's our New York accent. That's all that is. Iomadai. And you must feel this sort of Okay. That's our New York accent. That's all that is. Iomadai. Ew, ew. And you must feel this sort of tear within you as well because Atena has offered you the chance at saving your brother. Right. If you were to go to Minderhall.

Right, so he's sort of pushing that off as much as possible, but he's also trying to prey on it to Iomadai to say, like, is there a way? Like, is there a way that we could work with Minderhall to help my brother? And so far, right now, the fact that he's starting to get some powers back and he doesn't feel evil in these items and in this place,

he's starting to think maybe there's a chance. But there is a part of it that is just pure halfling curiosity. He just wants to see who this person was that he is supposed to be a scion of, and if he can really have that kind of power. So it's a little bit of both. But I wouldn't say he's torn. Both things are kind of going in the same direction, but just for different reasons. Right.

All right, so you see Baron and Umlo see that one room with a statue, and Nestor sees a room full of treasure. And then there's still another room beyond and as well as the room that you passed over on your way there. Nestor's going to start working his way towards the treasure room. What are the rest of you doing? Della will go with you. Okay. Is there any point in doing a further perception on the dais,

or is that the only thing? Is it just a clear, clean body? I'll join, but I really want to look at the Yelp review of this castle to see if this room's trapped, because a big pile of gold smells like crap. We never do any internet searches before we go into these places. So is everyone going to the treasure room? Yeah. Sir Will is keeping a wary eye on that statue in the distance as he's walking by.

Um, okay. Uh, just kind of watching. Yeah, he's just, you know, he's not interested in the gold so much, and he's, basically he's watching the party's flank. Baron, by the way, is spending the time to load the crossbow as he walks through this place, which is filled with fishes and creatures. As you walk into the room, are you guys walking in? Yeah. Well, Nestor's going up to the right side of the doorway as he looks at it and putting his back against the wall and looking around into the room.

You can see the parts of the ceiling of the room have collapsed and large blocks have just crashed through in several places. Oh, escape route? At the far end of the room lies the remains of what looks like a crumbled fountain. And then there's just hordes of treasure, and anyone that can detect magic is detecting a ton of magic. Okay. Can we see up to the surface?

Like, would this be an escape route? No, there's probably a thin hole that could be squeezed through, maybe. I mean, I shouldn't say that. There's some holes that you might be able to squeeze through, but you can't see clear up to the surface. You'd have to go into the room and look up.

Upon detecting magic, Baron's going to cycle through his inquisitive nature and detect alignments in that room. Okay. Is detect alignment not targeted? Cone-shaped emanation. So I go 60 feet away. So you just do, like, detect chaos and do a sweep. And then detect lawful and do a sweep.

It's evil, good, law, chaos. Yep. Alright, um... Four sweeps. So you detect evil and you do detect an evil emanation coming from the far end of the room. Second round. If this lasts for 12 seconds,

I get to know the number of evil auras. If it's just one, it's one. You detect one evil aura. And I get to... If it's evil and I'm of good alignment, I get to see... Okay. If it's super powerful, I'm stunned for one round. Okay.

Third round is power and location of each aura. Back of the room. Okay. Yes, one Back of the room. Okay. Yes, one back of the room. Are we within 60 feet of that? Is the back of that room 60 feet away or is it more than 60 feet away? It's less than 60 feet away.

Well, if it's out of my line of sight, I get to know its exact location. You're detecting it above the fountain. Okay. Strange. Where the break. Okay. Strange. Where the break-in ceiling is. Okay, so I... So Will's going to walk up next to Nestor

and just be close by the action and not be left behind. I get eyes on them and I don't know how much we can really communicate, but I say... Danger. Danger, danger, Will. And I point at the crack

in the ceiling um sir will is going to try to do hand motions to say like let's leave this room for later all this treasure and stuff it's a lore something is keeping it here it has nothing to do with what we're here for I mean we

don't know that no we don't but like that's his best guess to explore a little further rather than walking into the room but if you want to walk into the room we can walk into the room they all kind of want to walk into the room there are kind of cool magical items probably in there so I don't know

I mean it's kind of magic Baron thinks it's totally trapped gotta come here eventually might as well do it now so Will do you back up and go to that other room with the statue? Not alone. So Sir Will is emphatically just gesturing that he doesn't want to go, and all you guys are gesturing that you do, right?

I'd investigate the statues, too, and come back here. All right, let's go check out the statue first. All right, so we'll cycle back behind where the dais was and just take a look at the statues in that room back there before committing to the room of treasure death. Certain treasure death. All of you begin walking to the room with the statue? Yep. Yeah, Sir Will wants to check out the statue.

All right, so your hand motions were enough to pull them away from promise of treasure. Well, he's sort of also brandishing the, like on his belt, the headband. Because he just doesn't think that it's insignificant. He thinks that it might be something important, even though it's not resonating magic, and even though it's not as shiny as this other room. To peek into Will's head, he thinks that the treasure is a diversion. He thinks that he might have something really important to the temple and to Rosag, because it has this worn old symbol on it.

And so he wants to go to this statue to see if there's any symbols like that on the statue, or if maybe he could, like, I don't know, put it on the statue, and it'll unlock a secret door to all the answers. You know, that kind of thing. Right, right, right. So you want to head up there first. Does somebody want to go with him first? Troy, if I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times,

Inquisitor's got to inquisit, so I'm going to be up there. So Baron's in the back. I got to inquisit the back. I wonder what's going on behind us. I like this. I like Sir Will and Baron just kind of slowly approaching this room. Bro-file. Just a couple of guys that love religion. Right.

Love it. They do an underwater high-five at half-deck. Right. Very slow-motion high-five. Oh, you laid hands on me, huh? Synchronized swimming. So, yeah, you're kicking up the silt, kicking up the dust and the dirt, which provides concealment. kicking up the silt, kicking up the dust and the dirt,

which provides concealment. As you walk along, and you see in the distance a worn, algae-coated statue of an enormous humanoid figure standing towards the back of this chamber. It seems as if this statue is holding a large, circular disc in its hands. Like a discus? Kind of. You can't have it. Does it resemble the disc in the room that we went in that was on the floor? No. No, this is something

totally different. It's like holding a disc in its enormous hands. Well, hold on. It's holding the disc in two hands. In two hands, yeah. Okay. Definitely a laser disc. It chucks it at you. It is from an ancient civilization. I found it at a yard sale!

Now that's a tag. But, as I mentioned, the statue is flanked by a pair of stone menhirs that are also worn through time. You see as you approach... I'm sorry, a menhir, I'm not very educated. Is it just a stone? Like a column. Like a shaped stone. It's like a stonehenge.

Stonehenge, right, yeah. It's not like we haven't seen men here. The upright pieces. Yeah, it doesn't have the lintel to go on top. Yes, the upright pieces of the mien and the crustops of menthol. You see as you approach, and it's so... Nestor knew that? Yeah, that's a Nestor pull.

May I raise a practical question? Are we going to do Stonehenge tonight? Yes, we are. Wow, that's totally a different response than I was expecting. As long as Baron stays away from it, because we don't want it to be in danger of being crushed by a dwarf. Yes. You see Baron and Sir Will as you get closer.

Sir Will, you have a little bit of light from Delas Bardsville. Yeah, coming off the lance, the hybrid lance. And the light, like, if you shoot it or, like, glare it towards the room and up the statue, imagine it going from, like, the base of the statue all the way up to the face, and the face is, like, not there anymore. It's like Titanic. Like, as it washes up, you face, and the face is, like, not there anymore. It's like Titanic. Like, as it washes up, you see more and more of the earth. It's been worn.

Like, was it time that wore it away? Did someone deface it? You don't know, but you cannot make out what this giant was. Erosion. Who this giant was. Does it look broken or purposeful at all, or does it just look like it was worn away, worn away, worn away, worn away? Smooth like a stone baby's bottom.

I mean, you'd have to get closer to examine it, but the main point is the features are impossible to recognize, and that just adds an extra element of eeriness into the room. All right. I'll keep getting closer, then. You keep getting closer, and you see that the room itself doesn't appear to be too large. you see that the room itself doesn't appear to be too large. But as you and Baron step up to the front, you both hear a sound.

And you've heard sounds of fish darting past you. And maybe like an eel flies past Baron's feet. Baron, don't touch me there. And all of a sudden, a hulking creature that looks like it works out seven days a week jumps out in front of you, like with its flipper-webbed toes, claws. I can't say it's something that you recognize, Sir Will, but Baron has fought these creatures before. No. And there are four of them. No. It's shades of the river-esque. No. We're fighting creatures before. No. And there are four of them. No.

It's shades of the river-esque. No. We're fighting marrows. No. Next week. Yeah. You are the worst. You are the worst.

Talk, we have the new year. Would they be interested in fighting us on stage? The Glass Cannon Podcast is a powerhouse in tape production and is an officially licensed partner of Paizo Incorporated. Giant Slayer is copyright 2015. Giant Slayer and the Pathfinder Adventure Path are trademarks of Paizo. All Pathfinder images are property of Paizo and are used with permission. Thank you.