The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 121 - Bridge Over Troubled Slaughter

Episode Date: September 19, 2017

The party celebrates Ascension Day by battling a pair of Stone Giants on a bridge! Meanwhile, another Stone Giant senses something amiss while on guard duty. For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Order up for Damien. Hey, how did your doctor's appointment go, by the way? Did you ask about Rebelsis? Actually, I'm seeing my doctor later today. Did you say Rebelsis? My dad's been talking about Rebelsis. Rebelsis? Really? Yeah, he says it's a pill that...

That's right! Did you know it's also covered by most private insurance plans? Well, I'll definitely be asking my doctor if Rebelsis is right for me. Rebelsis. Ask your doctor or visit Rebelsis.ca. Order up for Rebelsis. This week on the Glass Cannon Podcast, the heroes must cross a bridge blocked by two stone giants. It's the day of Ascension, a very special holiday for followers of Iomedae.

And for people who fall to their deaths off of bridges in the sky. Sir Will is feeling confident. Well, that's exactly where I want to be. That's where Sir Will is meant to be. He's well-armored. He flies the flag of his house. But unbeknownst to the heroes... Meanwhile, back in Winterhall's Valley, just outside the castle walls no more than one battle might

rage on this ascension day baron della nester sir will umlo pembroke lork and razzmatazz all roll for initiative the adventure continues i feel very confident. No. Hello, dear friends. It's your old pal, Dr. Troy LaValle, Esquire, MDRN, DDS, the fourth. We're having fun. Oh, baby, are we having fun? We've got a wild episode coming at you pretty soon. You know, it's Monday. This episode comes out in a little bit.

This is probably the latest that I've ever recorded an intro for a show that's about to air. I'm getting ready to watch Monday Night Football. Hopefully, my Giants will defeat the Detroit Lions. But you guys don't care about football, you nerds. Let's talk about what's going on in GCP Nation. Going into today, I didn't really have much to say. And then I found out about an hour ago from everybody's old buddy, Joe O'Brien, that our panel submission for PAX Unplugged 2017 got accepted.

So on Friday, November 17th at 7.30 p.m. That's primetime, baby. In the Dragon Theater, we will be doing GCP Live at the first ever PAX Unplugged. I'm going to be there. Joe, Skid, Grant, and even Matthew, and maybe a special guest. We're going to do GCP Live. But wait, Troy, I can't make it to PAX Unplugged. Nobody wants to go to Philly. That place is terrible. Well, true though that is, don't worry, because it will also be broadcast live on the PAX Twitch channel. What? This is insane. We're going to be going live at the PAX Twitch channel. What? This is insane. We're going to be going live at the Dragon Theater,

and it's going to be broadcast live to the entire world. Hopefully a couple people are tuning in to the PAX Twitch channel on opening night of PAX Unplugged. Oh, my God. I've got to come up with a new storyline to try and rival what we did at Gen Con 50. So if you can be there, make sure you come Friday night, 7.30 p.m., opening night to the Dragon Theater and watch us put on, hopefully, one hell of a show. I tweeted out earlier today that I didn't really know what to say in this

week's intro. There's so much going on, my head is ready to explode. I couldn't even put it into words in an intro. So I mentioned maybe we'll do a contest. Well, now I have to do a contest. I can't just throw it out there and not do it. So we're going to do one called Show Me Your Loot Sheet. Troy, what does that mean? Well, this is what I want to know. I want to know how you guys record loot in your games. Do you just use a spreadsheet like we do? Well, that's not news to me. Everybody uses a spreadsheet. Is it color-coded? Oh, how innovative. No, I want to see people that do loot sheets in a way that we haven't even thought of. I want you to email us at glasscanonpodcasts at gmail. No, I want to see people that do loot sheets in a way that we haven't even thought of. I want you to email us at glasscanonpodcasts at gmail.com, subject line, show me your loot sheet.

And include pictures, explain how you do it, whatever you want to do. I want to see a way that is better than the way we do it, cooler, sexier. Because not only am I going to steal it for our own game, but my favorite ones that I read, I'm going to put those names in a hat, pull the name out, and that person is going to win a brand new signed copy of Bestiary 6. Now, as usual, I know, wait for it, we can't include international listeners on this. I'm so sorry, not yet. I feel sick to my stomach that we can't include international listeners on our contest just yet, but I promise very, very soon we will be able to do so. It's a little more complicated than how

everybody thinks it is. But, if you're domestic, and you've got a cool loot sheet, show me your loot sheet, and you could win a Bestiary 6. Had a hard time coming up with a title for this week's episode. Really wanted to be centered around bridge, you know? I was thinking maybe Fast Times at Bridgemont High?

That's kind of fun. Maybe Bridge on the River Dye? Hacksaw Bridge? Do something really topical of fun. Maybe Bridge on the River Dye. Hacksaw Bridge. Do something really topical. But at the end of the day, I went with something that really doesn't make any sense but sounded cool. So please enjoy episode 121 of the Glass Cannon Podcast,

Bridge over Troubled Slaughter. Even though they're really on top of the bridge and not over the slaughter. Just quiet down and enjoy the show from time to time I have the Pathfinder pawns I use when we play off of Roll20 and I was when my bag of pawns gets overflowed I'm like

alright I gotta put these back in their respective pawn boxes Bestiary 1 pawn box, Bestiary two box. So I was going through them today and my wife was like, oh, you're playing with your toys? I said, come on! I'm building a podcast empire! This guy goes into slot 92 and then I don't

have the NPC codex box. Joe has it. So there's a lot of the pieces that you guys use come from Joe's NPC codex box. So I was pulling some out that I could get back to it. I'm like, well, won't we need this little bear anymore? Oh, man. I was waiting for that to come.

Threw it across the room. Chucked it. Stepped on it. The cats batted around. I thought they never touched your little gaming supplies. Well, when you throw it at them and they think it's a toy, they go after it. But yeah. You never throw dice.

No. No, it never happens. So here we are. We're back. How's everybody doing? Fantastic. Why are you fantastic? Because I'm excited to play.

Why? Excited to play. You are in the vanguard right now against two stone giants. Yes! What makes you excited about this prospect? Well, that's exactly where I excited to play. You are in the vanguard right now against two stone giants. Yes! What makes you excited about this prospect? Well, that's exactly where I want to be. That's where Sir Will is meant to be. He is well armored.

He flies the flag of his house. He should be up front. Do you remember being in the Vault of Thorns, and you guys walk past that first room, and it's that bridge without the handrails? Yes. And I think that was back in your lork days. And you were like, I hate a bridge without handrails. Here's another one.

Here's another one. And yet it's not where the falling death occurred. No, oddly enough. Yeah, those lurkers in light did not have the strength to bull rush you guys off. At best, they could blind one of you. Right. Permanently. Grant still is suffering.

So is Gormley. Yeah. It's true. R.I.P. This is your first meeting in a real encounter with stone giants. Skid, you know stone giants are no joke.

You're running runelords. They're a big part of runelords. Oh, yeah. They're pretty beefy. This is a step up in sort of the giant land. Is it? I actually have no idea. Oh, yeah.

Are they a tier above the frost giants? No, they're a tier below frost giants. They're like the sophomores of the giant kingdom. That's true. If hill giants are freshmen, they're sophomores. They've got a Honda Accord. They're driving to school every day. Yeah, that's right.

Whereas Cloud Giants are fourth-year seniors. Yeah. Fourth-year seniors? No, it's like fifth-year seniors. Fifth-year seniors. They're redshirt freshmen. No, they stayed four extra years. Oh, gotcha.

Fourth-year seniors. They're in their fourth senior year. Right, right. So they're really burnt out. year right right so they're really burnt out Steve Holt Steve Holt what did we fight

back in the Grog Hall Frost Giant he's a junior yeah he's a junior yeah Giant Academy

so it's Frost then Fire right Frost then Fire and then well and that's the last no one lived that long yeah

but yeah that's usually that's the classic progression but what's cool about Pathfinder is they've created And then, well, no one will live that long. But yeah, that's usually, that's the classic progression. But what's cool about Pathfinder is they've created all these other giants that didn't exist, you know, when we were playing as kids. So you guys are on this bridge. It's the Day of Ascension, a very special holiday for followers of Iomaday. And for people who fall to their deaths off of bridges in the sky. Followers, F-A-L-L-O-W. Followers, that's all.

I'll see myself up. A very special day. I'm sure you were taught by your adoptive parents about what this means to be a follower of Yomadai, the, you know, the crossing of the,

Iomadai, Iomadai, whatever, the big eye in the sky. That was great. And emboldened, emboldened by this, you know,

religious fervor, your powers are coming back slowly, but surely you decide to go forward as you crest this 100-foot-long bridge, or maybe 200 feet long. I'd have to check my notes. It's 200 feet long. 200 feet long bridge.

You get to the apex, and now you can see to the other side there are two stone giants. One of them just... throws a boulder. The other one, maybe you've got a boulder. The other one, maybe you've got a boulder in hand just charging at you.

I need two characters right now to roll a very important perception check. Oh, that's not Sir Willamette. He's got his visor down. I'll make it easy for you. I'll tell you which characters. Damn it! I shouldn't have showed my hand.

Pembroke and Lork. Whoa. What? Are they under the bridge like the Red Hot Chili Peppers? Pause while I go get a character sheet? Yeah, excuse me. What the hell? All right.

I have them ready. Almost. You know what? I'll just roll the one, and then I'm going to have to go get the sheet. Yeah, yeah. Just roll the one and take a minus two. Natty 19. Oh.

Nice, Lork. I'm perceptive of you. I'll have to look this up. He's got a good perception, if memory serves. He's lying down. 20 total. 20 total. And Lork is probably 26, 25.

Probably more, I would think. It must be hard having two character sheets in your hero lab. He's a ranger. As opposed to 40, like mine. You can't get there quick, Joe? I just have the load times. That is a 31. 31!

He's a ranger, dude! All right, so imagine you're still smarting from this emotional rip of your soul from a couple days ago, I guess. You don't quite know what it meant, but something struck you inside, Lork. Yeah. Can't put your finger on it. Yeah, and I think he definitely, since then, has felt this reinvigoration, I guess. Not like an excitement, but now he's like, I need to get well. Because I feel like I have to fight.

Like something is going to happen here and I need to be ready to fight. And he's just sort of reinvigorated to try doing whatever he can. Push-ups in the tent. Right. Pull-ups. Right. He's all upper body now. Yeah.

He's ripped. Huge upper body. He's the best wheelchair basketball player of all time. Exactly. Exactly. Got tiny little child shins. He's just. Huge upper body pass. The best wheelchair basketball player of all time. Exactly. Exactly. Got tiny little child shins. He's just doing ab work. As your muscles are.

Mountain climbers. But you have to imagine, though, you probably have a strong lower body, and it's just atrophying. You're not up on your feet moving around. Right. But you had this feeling a couple days ago, and Aram and Ymir did their best to sort of comfort you. Pembroke obviously reached out to you to be like everything's going to be okay. You're going to see your friends again.

Don't worry. We'll figure this out. But of course Pembroke also knows he doesn't have a cure for your missing feet. Aram and Ymir What did I do to my friend? Well, I kind of want to pitch something. I think Aram and Ymir being their did I do to my friend? Well, I kind of want to pitch something. I think Aram and Ymir being their father being who he was,

I think they should be able to have some level of basic first aid that they can sort of continually do to Lork, whether it's patching things up, making like a solve out of sending Razzmatazz out for herbs at night. Whatever I found, guys!

You know, something that sort of starts to get him past this constant pain and to start refocusing. Totally. I mean, we've just sort of hand-waved that. But, I mean, that is what's happening. They've said, you know, Aram said specifically, he's like, I don't have my father's powers. I haven't, you know, I wasn't able to get what he has yet.

Maybe someday, you know. Now that he has lost his father, he's lost his teacher as well. So he's going to have to forge. I'm sorry, which one is this? Aram's the older brother. Ymir's the younger brother. And they're followers of Abadar, right? Abadar, yeah.

So every time they put a salve on Lord, they're like, that'll be three silver pieces. That's right. No, you just see them like write something in a ledger. Don't worry about it. We'll settle up later. Perhaps you've met our friend Tayari Varadis. something in a ledger. Don't worry about it. We'll settle up later. Perhaps you've met our friend, Tayari Varadis. Back in Trinidad. She rips off her Ioma Dye armor.

There's Avatar underneath. But while Pembroke is providing this emotional support, you know, they're doing their best to keep you, you know, physically well. You can tell they're not. They're kind of stumbling around, having been around Galabras. They're not Galabras-level healers, but they can make you comfort you. It hurts terribly! Sorry! Never got this far!

You're laying there, Lork, and you're stewing over this, and you just hear a sound off in the distance. Now you're in this invisible tent or whatever you want to call it. Camouflage. This camouflage tent from the spike

that you've dropped into the ground. But you see off in the distance a stone giant coming up towards the Oculus' tent. Oh, shit. Kind of looking around. And you probably didn't see this, but having talked to Pembroke, or if you guys were sending people out to kind of look you would know that they are guards

you know maybe Baron and Adela and Nestor and Sir Will told you about this four stone giant guards we saw out front maybe they're guards so this guy is canvassing the joint and he goes into the Oculus tent and disappears you wake up Pembroke

and Pembroke was already like trained stay quiet looking on it and the stone giant tent and disappears. You wake up Pembroke and Pembroke was already like trained. Careful. Stay quiet. Looking on it. And the stone giant comes out of the tent and you see him like crouch down to one knee. And he's like feeling at the ground.

And he begins walking towards where you guys are hidden. So does everybody see this now? Because I've kind of like... I mean, you're on your back, obviously. Razzmatazz jumps up. What's going on?

Lurk grabs Gorim's thorn. He's kind of like holding it on his side, ineffective as it may be. And this thing is just walking towards you and you see that it knows something isn't right.

It doesn't see you guys, but it is coming directly towards you, and if it interacts with this space that you're hidden in... Pembroke, is there a spell you can cast? Yes, I have something that may be useful.

And what do you do, Pembroke? I cast Charm Monster. Baron, Della, Nestor, Sir Will, Umlo, Pembroke, Lork, and Razzmatazz. All roll for initiative. Oh, Jesus. Oh, my God. We're going to go round by round, back and forth

between these two moments. Holy shit. And I already hate myself for this idea. This is the worst idea you've ever had, I think. Oh my God. I'm not prepared with these load times. Alright. Alright. So Pembroke, 10.

Shit. 11 for Della. Oh, 28 for Nesta. I rolled a natural 4, which gives me a 16, of course. Obviously. Obviously. Obviously. I add my wisdom to my modifier now. The panties your mother laid?

Natural 20. For sir, we're out of here. That's a big one. Modified 18. Modified 22. 22. Wow. That is awesome. 19 for umlaut. 22. Wow. That is awesome.

19 for Umlaut. 19 for Umlaut. Why do I do this to myself? Lork. Lork is a 7. That's about right. Lork's back, baby. All right.

No. Let me just bring out some more ponds onto these. This dual map. I was wondering. I'm so glad none of you asked me. Why are there, like, two maps out? There's the bridge map. I thought it was just a wider.

I thought you were covering something up. Yeah, I thought you were planning on us falling off the bridge, and that was the ravine below. Is that an official red cap pond? I thought you were planning on us falling off the bridge and that was the ravine below. Is that an official redcap pond? That is as close as I could get right before we recorded. Lork, I'll be to mine. I didn't get you a base.

Boo! Boo! Think of the money we're saving on bases. Think of the money Lork will save on shoes Alright So this is how we're going to do this Never in the history of this show Have we done this

We are going to go back and forth So round one is going to happen for the bridge people And then round one is going to happen For the people back at the camp And we will continue Until both encounters have been resolved. Oh, man. In episode 125. Yeah!

Alright. Oh, my God! We'll call it round 1A. Sir Will. Sir Will of it! I had a 28. Round 1A. Nesta Coy.

So I'm still I'm affected by fleas Alright You are affected by fleas You got the fleas I got the fleas Bad case of the fleas Alright

So he's going to do The study target He's very happy to be On the open air And he's going to take aim With the lead giant With his Study target And First attack Multi shots And he's going to take aim at the lead giant with his studied target.

And first attack. Multi-shots. 24 to hit. 24 is a hit. And that is... 40 points of damage. Nice open! So that was the frontmost stone giant.

Yes. The one that was charging towards Sir Will. Just... Yep. Hit. And second attack. Second attack. Oh, wait.

Don't roll an eight-sided die. It hits, you idiot. It's Canada! 19. That is a miss. Okay. All right. And now it is Sir Will's turn.

Sir Will, what'd I say? You're about 80 feet away. 80 feet away. From the foremost giant, the one that Nestor pegged for 40 points of damage. 40 points? Damn! He's charging at you, Sir Will. He is.

What are you going to do? He is. Damn it. I'm just out of charge range, which is crazy talk. But I am. I am going to hold. Sir Will is going to hold. Yeah.

He's just buying a second here so that he can get the maximum impact out of his charge. Do it. Delaying. Exciting moves, as always, from Sir Will. It's so annoying. If it was ten feet closer, I would have it. Ten feet closer. Umlo played by, who's playing ums this week?

I'm umlo. Yeah. All right, what do you got, ums? Umlo is going to double move out onto the bridge. Oh. Alright what do you got Ams? Umlo is going to double move out Onto the bridge So Umlo just Double move for Umlo now with his barbarian level Brings him, is that 60 feet? 60 feet

And he's going to take a step One of those five feet is going to go To the left so he's a little closer to the edge of the bridge Let me ask you this Does he say anything to Sir Will on the way like This is how it's done or does he just run past? He accidentally punches

Sir Will on the face with a steel hand. Right. That's what happens. Sure. You should roll your will save. I should now roll my will save. Roll away.

Fail. Raging. Raging. Raging. Raging. Raging. All right. The one way in the back. It's Stone Giant's turn. Chucks a boulder at UMS.

Actually, you can chuck two boulders. First one. Don't forget UMS bonuses to his, you know, because he's fighting a giant. Fifteen. Miss. Why did I even ask? Second rock. Also a miss.

Umlo is just like. The next stone giant attempts to bull rush Umlo off of the bridge. Oh, no. You are. This is a terrible. You are. Oh, no. Why did you move closer to the edge? A couple things are going to happen. This is a terrible situation. Why did you move

closer to the edge? A couple things are going to happen. A couple things are going to happen. You're going to get an attack of opportunity. That's how it works.

It does not have improved bull rush. However, if it succeeds on the bull rush by five or more because you are as close as you are

to the bridge, you will be pushed off the bridge. End of story. I don't want to hear anything more. That is a 100-foot drop. Oh, wow. Take your attack of opportunity.

10d6. 10d6. So, attack of opportunity. Giant's pain. Plus two for the giant's pain. You're raging. Come on, buddy. Come on, UMS! Matthew, this is important.

Mind you, UMS is like stabbing when he's still 15 feet away. 94. Oh, no! So that's a 19 to hit. Yeah, that's going to be a miss. Damn it. Really the least important part of this equation. Now, are you going to get a bonus to your CMD because of your defensive training against giants?

Or is that just a bonus to AC? I'm sure it's to CMD. I'm only asking Greg. It also applies to CMD. Okay. Will that be automatically applied on my Hero Lab? No, you just have to add four. Here is...

I don't know what else to say. Here is the rule. Hero Lab, I'm fighting a giant. I'm fighting a giant Hero Lab. Why don't you listen to me, Hero Lab? I'm exactly what you do for a favored enemy, you dicks. I'm going to go out on a limb. I'm going to go out on a limb here, Matthew,

and say it's going to beat your CMD. I could be wrong, but what's important is if it beats it by five or more. Here is the roll. All right. Not is the roll. All right. Not a great roll. Okay. 24.

Fail. Yeah. Straight up fail. Straight up fail. So it is just right up in Umlo's 12. 22 CMD for Umlo plus the four for defensive training. So Umlo just like, I imagine he's like braces heart spit in the ground. He's like digging in with his heel.

He's like. The fist is glowing. Sir Will is going to go now. How convenient. Yes. How convenient. Now that he's within range, he sees him almost push Umlo off. Right.

Umlo just. Will is going to challenge the stone giant. Lower his lance for high body! For high body! Full-blown charge straight at the giant. 32 to hit. Yup. Booyah, Kasha.

And he does... Oh, my God. Do it. He does 28 points of damage. Yeah. Holy menderhaw. Man! 68 points done on him so far. Woo, baby.

Wow. And what's great is you've given him another target to push off the bridge. Which is what excites me the most. Another small target. I fear not. I already got a title for this app. Good night, Lexington. Della, you're up

Della is going to take Move over to Nestor And touch him and banish him Oh you sneaky Thank you Sneaky fetchling Thank you my dear Thank you my love

Baron Baron Hart Baron immediately Baron Baron Baron Berenson How many times is my backstory going to change on this damn show? Thanks for consulting me on that, Troy. I really appreciate it.

But at least it's the least interesting thing about Baron. More interesting right now, casting long shot on his pistol and moving 20 feet forward. Okay, so long shot on the pistol, which extends the range how much? 10 feet. 10 feet could be all that matters. Meanwhile, back in Minderhall's Valley, just outside the castle

walls. No. I never thought I'd say this, but it's Razzmatazz's turn. Oh my god. He turns to Pembroke and is like, What should I do? Should I go after it? He says, Wait here for just a moment. I'm going to try something.

If it doesn't work, you can do your worst. You got it, Fred. I got your back. And Razzmatazz delays his action. And it is Pembroke's turn. All right. And he does, in fact, cast Charm Monster,

DC 19 will save. What if we got a fucking stone giant that's an actual guard already in this camp? Right. Charm Monster on the stone giant. Take us to the forge. From Troy's face, I don't think he really is happy

about this turn of events. I feel good about the will. Gotta see. 18 fail. Oh, my God! face, I don't think he really is happy about this turn of events. I feel good about the will. Gotta see. 18. Fail. Oh my god! You have charmed the stone giant. Now let's walk me through the charm spell again.

So he treats me as if I am a friend and trusted ally for the next seven days. Friend and ally for the next seven days. Oh and ally for the next seven days. Oh my God. All right. So that was fun.

So now we don't have to worry about that. No, that encounters over. I guess we will finish it this episode. So the stone giant starts walking up and all of a sudden is just charmed. Yeah, Pembroke like raises his walking stick slash bonded staff, and the glowing light comes out and it washes over him.

Lork, it's your turn. Right now, you see that Pembroke has the situation under control. However, there is a stone giant just standing there, not knowing what just happened in the middle of this open area. Lork is also going to delay. He's going to hold and wait to see if this thing actually worked. He's trying to keep as low profile as possible. He'll say, I have to get back in his voice.

It's been a while. Pembroke, if you've got him, call him over here. Bring him close. On my turn, I shall. Aram and Ymir, taking a cue from both Pembroke and Lork, know to hold as well. Oh, can I do another? Pulling out daggers, ready to go.

Can I just do another perception just to see if there's any other patrolling giants kind of behind them, or if this is our only threat right now? Sure. 17. 17. You don't see anything at the moment. Okay. Okay.

However, your black hour training would lead you to believe they would never send one guard out alone. Yeah, it seems strange. If this is a tightly run ship. Yeah, yeah. I mean, when we saw them before, there was two and a bear. You know, so maybe one and a bear are just nearby. That's kind of what I was thinking. So everybody holds, and the monster is just standing there

and he can't see why he's been charmed or like he can't see the sort of where this came from but he just feels like... Well, actually, I think he would probably continue like he would feel a little strange but he'd probably continue following the tracks

because he doesn't know but then when he sees Pembroke he'd be like, old friend yeah you know like i think that's kind of how it would play out right right so he just started walking that way and something emotionally took over him and so he's just slowly walking towards you guys meanwhile back it is round two nor coin is now banished. All right.

And Nestor, like, he sees Omlo in trouble, and he's like, no fucking way. Not on my watch. Takes a five-foot step and does a second full attack on this Gigantor. Oh, that's a hit with the many shots. Oh, boy. And that's another 40 points of damage. Holy crap.

All right. So it is pretty hurt. Still alive. It's not dead? No, no, no. These things have a ton of damage. Over a hundo, huh? Yeah, yeah.

Wow. In the hundo club. Second attack. Damn it. Another miss. Second arrow. But this thing is bloodied. And now you're visible.

As it were. And I am visible. And you are visible. Amlo. Face to face with this thing. Your hands are kind of tied. You can't get an attack off without incurring. Yeah, he's going to...

So he's going to... Do I dare risk it all for the flanking? Oh, that Nestor always said, Get away from the edge! Get away from the edge, Omlo! Alright, then he won't. Omlo! So yeah, Nestor's gonna incur and step back so he can get him with

heart spear. Okay. Here it comes. Oh boy, 25. Yep. Yep. Omlo gets hit for 15 points of damage. Just boom! And he's like, ah!

He's so angry! So where is Umlo in relation to the edge now? So now he's 15 feet away from falling off. Yeah. Right? And basically he stepped back towards the center of the bridge. Right, okay. And he's going to be able to get one stab off after taking that hit.

Yeah. Okay. Attack away. 20 to hit. Yeah. Okay. Attack away. Um, 20 to hit. 20 is a miss! Ah, shit. Alright. I hate this giant! Kill it!

Kill it! The stone giant that just smashed Umlo. Takes a five foot step back and then just Sir Will, you're standing now ten feet away Ten feet away. It molds into the bridge

and disappears. What? Oh come on. Oh no. Oh come on man. The other one. Is the bridge made of stone? The bridge is made of stone. The other one throws a boulder

at Sir Will. First boulder. This is a joke. I don't even know why I'm trying. Crack die. 23. Miss. Come on! We're gonna hit you with a rock. Alright, another miss.

Boom! These boulders are just flying by Sir Will's head. And it's Sir Will's turn. Sir Will, this thing just disappeared right in front of you. All right, can I do a quick perception at the ground to see if it seems clear for me to charge over it or if, like, I see something funky on the ground where it disappeared?

Right, yeah, yeah, you can definitely look. A 12. 12. Nothing looks particularly funky. It doesn't make any sense. But it also seems somewhat very familiar to you, what just happened. Familiar to me? Yes, to you specifically.

Huh. Somewhat very familiar. Can I roll a knowledge local? You can roll knowledge arcana if you have it. I don't. I don't. All right. He is going to, for the lack of that target, he's going to level his lance again at the farther guy

and now charge to the other end of the bridge. Firebomb! Again, lowering his lance, charging full bore. And that is a... Sorry, I am not, this guy is not part of the challenge. That is a 25 to hit. Yeah. 25 to hit is a hit.

That'll do. Oh, my God. Oh, amazing. He does 18 points of damage. That was a really high roll. All right. Nice. Box cars.

You hit this guy for 18 damage. Not too shab, Sir Will. So you're just charging along. You're almost at the other side of the bridge. And I go past him, so I ride by. But I don't have enough to go out of his reach, but I do go past him. Do you continue running to the next encounter? Yes, exactly.

Okay, just need to know. All right, Della. You just banished Nestor six seconds ago. Della would like to do a Knowledge Arcana on what the stone giant is. Yeah, what the hell just happened? What happened? Go for it. Natty, 16, 27. knowledge arcana on what the stone giant What the hell just happened? Go for it.

Natty 16, 27. You're looking at what he did and you're like, where have I seen this before? Wait a minute, this is what Sir Will has been doing. The earth elemental belt. It was some sort of earth glide maneuver. So he just

became the bridge. And what do we know about that? You can move. You can pass through stone, dirt, almost any sort of earth except metal as easily as a fish swims through water. You don't move very fast. That's what you know. Okay, that's good. And he gave no indication of what direction he was moving.

No, just boom. He just went straight down. Yeah. Okay, I think the He just went straight down. Yeah. Okay. I think the spell, it's like 10 feet per round or something silly like that. It's like very limited speed. Well, you are traveling through solid matter. That's true.

And you're basically immune unless someone were to destroy the bridge while you're in this form? I think so. Does anybody have dynamite? Yeah. Just like take out the bridge. Let's place charges. Okay. Della, for lack of a better option, is going to vanish Nestor again.

Oh, thank you. Okay. Another vanish for Nestor just to give him that extra boost of damage. Baron, you cast Longshot on yourself. You moved up. Della will share the knowledge, obviously. Share the knowledge. She's like, Earthglide.

In a very deep, manly voice. Earthglide. Earthglide. Earthglide, bros. Earthglide, guys. Definitely Earthglide. Baron, you're up. Long shot. Baron's going to stay... Well, the only giant he can see is so far out of his range, he wouldn't hit it.

So he's going to move 20 feet forward, clasp the hand of stone hanging around his neck, and tremor sense out 30 feet. Nice. I love it. Wow. This is the first appropriate use of that thing. This is awesome. Wow.

Okay, so you tremor sense out, and that gives you how much? 30 feet. 30 feet. Okay, so you sense out. And I moved right around where they were. And you do sense some vibrations in the bridge, maybe 15, 20 feet away from Humlo. So this thing just went into the bridge and, like, backed up a tiny bit. Okay. Towards his buddy. Okay. Good use and backed up a tiny bit towards his buddy.

Okay. Good use of tremor sense. Thank you, sir. Alright. Oh no. A space whale. A space whale. Meanwhile, back at the space whale foundation. Meanwhile, back outside the Cathedral of Minderhall, you got this stone

giant just walking up. It looked like it was walking with a purpose, like tracking you maybe. And then, boom, charmed. And now it just feels a little strange, but it's still walking forward. I don't think it can see us. It can't quite figure out what it wants to do. Pembroke, show yourself. And so it turns around and starts walking back.

No, don't let it go. And calls something out behind him. No! Oh, wait. Well, do I get a turn before he does that? Yes, yes, yes. Okay. It's Razzmatazz's turn.

He's like, what should I do? I think I should go after him. No, no. Hold, please, hold. Part of me feels like I should just go help. I know, I know. But don't help. All right.

Please don't help. I'll hang back. Please don't help. And it's Pembroric's turn all right uh pembric is going to cast message message okay wizards uh let me do anything yeah um so old school yeah so and i actually this is something I had to spend two slots on because it's an opposing school. But he says, hello there. Over here, my little friend. And he looks down at Lorik and says, oh, don't worry.

He'll be all right. So you must keep us safe. You must keep your fellows away from us. It is very critical that we not be found. So odd. He hears this in his head. Yeah. Okay, roll a charisma check.

Okay. Because his natural impulse is to call his friend. He's not angry But something doesn't seem right Something's going on Yeah, he doesn't see you guys Now he's hearing a voice in his head I'm hearing a voice in my head

Eleven I bet he has great charisma This is an imposed charisma check Alright, so you roll an eleven It rolls its plus zero to charisma Come on, come on Wait, we gotta bulk up Damn it Ten Yeah It rolls its plus zero to charisma. Come on, come on. Oh, here we go. God damn it.

Ten. Yeah! Yeah! Wow. So, you know, I misspoke. I said it called out his friend. It turned around like... And then it hears this message.

And then it kind of turns around and just looks back. Lork. Lork holds. Lork holds. A round. Pembroke is doing his thing, yeah. A near hold. And this stone giant just doesn't...

He doesn't know what the hell is going on. And he actually seems a little nervous. Not like scared, but feels... Where he doesn't see anybody and hears voices in his head. Maybe this is a test from Urthash. Maybe this is some sort of other creature casting a spell on him. He looks very apprehensive right now. Okay.

Yeah, Lork is just going to reinforce to Pembroke, like, go out, go out. You sure you don't want me to go out there? I have to take him out in two blows. No, no, no, it's all right. I feel very confident. Now, it's... You, I'm not going to explain to you

why this is very similar to something you've experienced. All right. It is. Just trust me, my trusted friend. My old and trusted friend. You got it, is. Just trust me, my trusted friend. My old and trusted friend. You got it, buddy. Thank you, sir.

Meanwhile, back at the bridge. Round three. Nestor, you are vanished again. Deligist, boom, vanish, boom, vanish, boom, vanish.

So how, I've never, I've never shot at anything outside my first range increment with the bow. I think it's a minus two. It's a minus two to hit. And I think to damage or just to hit.

Yeah, I think. Okay. Luckily, the range increment is 110 feet. So you're just outside of your first. Just outside the first. Yes. All right. So I'm going to study target, do the

mini shot, and that's actually... That is a 24 to hit. That is a hit, guys. Even from a mile and a half away. Fuck yeah, bro! I shoot my arrow in the air

where it lands. I know not where. Sorry, it was against his flat-footed AC. Yeah, that's, yes. Well, it's the same, probably. 35 points of damage. 35 points of damage. Okay.

So that guy is getting plunk, plunk. And second shot. Now you're visible. Visible again. And it's a miss. Again. I can never hit him that second fucking shot. Crush it on that first hit.

But the second one, it's a far distance. It is. How far was it? It's like miss. Again. I can never hit on that second fucking shot. Crush it on that first hit. But the second one... It's a far distance. It is. How far was it? It's like 120 feet. 120 feet. Or 230, I think. It's 130 feet. Wow.

Yeah. This isn't Wamp Rats with your T-16s, kid. I know. This is Stone Giants on a bridge. Umlaut. Don't worry. It'll be all right. You should have had Alec Guinness play Pembroke.

I thought of it. I have a pretty good Alec Guinness. I was thinking about it. You have an excellent Alec Guinness. Thank you. Oh, no, don't worry, he'll be all right. Obi-Wan Kenobi. Obi-Wan.

That's a name I've not heard in a long time. A long time. Um, so what do you got? So, Umlo. You must be never bored. You're alone for hours and hours and hours. No, no, he's not dead. Not yet.

All right. Is he, in fact, you? Of course I know him. He's me. Umlo, using the information that Baron possibly shared with him. Oh, yeah. Baron let everyone know. He's on the bridge!

He's going to take heart spit and just stab it at where he assumes it's going to be. Interesting. Go ahead and roll. Umlo doesn't know what stone shape or earth glide is. He's not much of a person. He doesn't know. He doesn't know. Umlo doesn't know what stones shape or earth glide is you're raging he doesn't know I'm low doesn't know it's gonna attack a stone

27 heart spit breaks in half 27 um okay this is one of those things like the PCs are always gonna do stuff you don't expect so you move like 10 feet forward to go to where I told you he was, I'm guessing, to do that? Sure.

Yeah. Okay. All right. So you stab in there. Nothing happens. Okay. But you feel compelled to jump off the bridge. You feel like you went off the bridge and you're raging and you just can't see straight.

So you want to jump off the bridge after it with your spear pointed down. All right, next turn. I guess I'll just jump off the bridge. That's what I'll do. Thanks for playing along. All right, this guy here realizes that throwing rocks is not working out for him. He's got this tiny little guy on a donkey. Magical wolf.

On a magical wolf, so he quick draws his great club. He has the quick draw feat, huh? He does have the quick draw feat. Five foot step, quick draw. Boom, boom with the great club. At Lexington. No, at Sir Will. First attack.

Come on! 24. Hit. Yeah! Really? Exactly. Oh, wow. You're a wolf. Okay, wow. You're a wolf.

Okay. Okay. We're rolling some of my new D8s here. It's going to be 19 points of damage. Okay. Second attack. Come on, Troy. Come on, 20.

Come on. 21. Miss. Miss. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Meanwhile, the other stone giant in the ground.

Where is he? I don't know. Where could he be? He pops up out of the ground and attempts another bull rush at Umlo. Attack of opportunity? Attack of opportunity. Do it. He's got to be low, man.

He kind of like, he basically came up from the right side of the bridge like Sandman in the old Spider-Man cartoons. But all stone. Natty 8's at 25 to hit. 25 is a hit. No, I'm sorry. Wait. Liar.

Liar. Natty 8. Yeah, 27 to hit. Yeah. Ha ha. Can't be correct. That is a hit. Elmo? Yeah, 27 to hit. Yeah! Ha ha! Can't be correct. That is a hit. Elmo is now plus 19 to hit.

Plus 15. Plus 15. So that's a 23. 23. No, but it's plus 17 against Giants. I was counting to you. You told Hero Lab. That's still a hit, right?

23 is a hit. Nice. Good. Ooh! I saw one six. Zero left. That's still a hit, right? 23 is a hit. Nice. Good. Ooh. I saw one six. That is 18 points of damage. All right. All right, Matthew.

Could have been better. You added the plus two to damage as well, right? 20 points of damage. So here we go. Okay. Yeah. It's going to take a massive CMB roll here But I'm gonna try

To just blow you back I need more space here All these cracked eye Yeah Missed again You can't get a roll I can't get a roll To save my life

I'm gonna just stand And just go All right So now it is back And it's right up in Sir Will's face. Oh, okay. You put that there. And it is Sir Will's turn.

Sir Willamette! This thing, five foot step back. One good hit, and then just misses. Yeah, so Sir Will is a little too close to charge the guy that's right next to him, but the target of his challenge has just popped back up. Sir Will is going to take an attack of opportunity from the giant in front of him and charge past

him. He's going to look up at the stone giant and just say, I'm going to take out your cowardly friend. For Hymery! He charges past the one stone giant. Go ahead and make an attack of opportunity. Come on, Crit. That's going to be aes. Come on, crit. Come on, crit. Don't you crit.

That's going to be a hit. Like 27 to hit. Yeah. All right, so he's going to give you a big wallop on the way by. Oh. Boom. With a great club. Oh, yeah.

That's going to be 24 points of damage. Oh, that's. Boom. Substantial. Substantial damage. But you are free. Oof. Okay.

Then Sir Willamette then continues his high-brace charge. He gets kind of knocked off Lexington a little bit, but then he rights himself. He's got like another 50 feet to right himself and land this charge, hopefully, on his challenged foe. His challenged foe. Natural one. Oh, no! God damn it! Roll to confirm.

Oh, no. God damn it. Does not confirm. Just a miss. God, I really wanted to finish him off. I really wanted to fan fumble. You fall off your mountain, get thrown ten spaces in one direction. Lose, lose.

Oh, man. Question. Oh, no, that won't provoke from him anyways. All right, Della. Della, you've been working buff this game. Della is going to double move towards the earth-gliding stone giant. Deligious. Closing the gap. Closing the gap.

Closing the gap. Baron, with your long shot. Baron is going to reach into the heavens, and even though it's Ascension Day for I-O-Me Day, he's going to ask for a little bit of a judgment of sacred destruction at plus one. Oh, shit. For the first time ever, Baron is going to use a deed that's never been used on the show before and spend two grit points. Get out of here.

Two grit points. Literally leave this apartment. What are you doing? I am using Deadshot, which is essentially Vital Strike. Oh! You get to use, you make as many attack rolls as you can based on your base attack bonus. I'm not doing Rapid Shot because Rapid shot is not a part of base attack bonus.

You only misfire if both are misfires, and you get to critical both shots if one of them is in a crit range. Wow. Well, vital strike, you only get one attack. Right. So it's not exactly. Right. It's basically a safe way once your base attack bonus gets really high as a gunslinger to. So you roll both attacks, and they don't resolve until you see what both rolls happen.

Right. Yeah. But you can't misfire and you'll crit. You can, but only if you misfire both. Right. I'm scared. Let's see it happen. And I'm doing up close and deadly as well.

Nice. Fire when ready. The only way... You can't use two deeds at the same time if they both say, for example, they require a swift action. Okay. And does this require, how many grip points do you have in a day? Three. Still only three, right?

All right, so two. This is a big, big moment here for Baron. First attack. Come on, Baron. Yeah. Boom. Second attack. Yeah.

Is a hit. Oh. Ah. Oh. And up goes some deadly. Yeah, all right. Here's a hit. And I propose some deadly. It is so deadly. 19 points of damage. And Baron kills the sword. Yeah!

There we go, baby! 22 points of damage. Doesn't matter. Nice. And now... Nice walk Baron Thank you Back

Outside Of the cathedral Of Minderhall Are you sure You don't want me to go I really feel like I got this I'm quite sure

I'm quite sure But Troy's got my Stat sheet And he's ready to roll I know I know You sure I know you were

Probably very excited And I'm sorry I think this will be Really fun Alright I'll wait Pembroke Street I know you were probably very excited, and I'm sorry. I think this will be really fun. All right, I'll wait. Pembroke Street. So he says,

Go about your business as normal. These aren't the droids you're looking for. Come back later after dark, and you shall talk again. Ooh, interesting. Pretend you've never heard my voice. All right, so he, like, the whole time, you know, he's walking there,

he hears this, wants to turn around and yell for his friend. If you build it, he will come. Now I gotta build something? What the fuck is a baseball? And he's just like, he's got this, you know, he had his great club in his hand.

The voice, Urathash, had told me to build a baseball diamond in the fighting pits. You're insane. A man named Joe without footwear. He'll approach me, I suppose. I'll summon him from the corn. And he walks away. Okay. All right.

Oh, my God. Yeah, you better walk away. What? No, sorry. Lork fires his longbow. Razzmatazz charges. All right, so Lork, Inaram, and Ymir.

Lork, to satisfy Razzmatazz, will say, let's try one of our little scraps. And he attacks him for non-lethal damage. He attacks Razzmatazz? Yeah, just a little sparring match. This is something

they've had to do frequently, I think, to satisfy his urges. No scythes allowed. I was about to do two scythe attacks on him. And a boot kick. Alright, so this has been quelled for the moment. It walks away.

Oh, that's awesome! Yes! Tide monster! Back at the bridge. Round four. Hey! Hey! Take it back to the bridge.

Hey! Take it back to the... Can I take it back to the bridge? Can I take it back to the bridge? Bop, bop, bop, bop, bop. All right. It is Nestor's turn. You've been just laying out damage, but you are very, very far away.

I'm going to throw this out here. Grappling hook, crawl down to the valley, leave forever. That's a great idea. I'm going to take that under consideration and ignore it. Okay, good. Fair enough. All right, so I'm going to do the same. I'm going to full attack this giant at the other end of the bridge.

Second range increments. Yeah. 24 to hit. 24 is awesome. And that is... Oh, boy. All right. Oh, boy, I'm scared.

Oh! Ooh. Are you rolling d20s for damage? No, no, no. 50 points of damage. Nestor and this giant are at complete opposite ends from the apex down to the bottom

couldn't be farther away just launching these arrows at it I'm thinking now should it have got some sort of cover for shooting through all this mess no he's arcing over it's so far away that he has to arc the arrow. It's not a straight shot. Yeah, think about like a Hail Mary versus like a 20-yard strike.

Yeah. It's not going to get blocked at the line of scrimmage. Makes sense. Well, I mean, he could have some vision issues. Yeah, that could be. Sure, sure, sure. Yeah. But at this point.

But it's still taller. It's still double the height of everyone else on the field. True. Okay. And second attack. That helps. And another miss. Awesome. Another miss. All right. Umla. Um of the Low Clan.

Umla is going to... He's going to move up 30 feet towards the other stone giant and brace. Nice. Nice. All right. Sombra moves up. He's about 25 feet away from this guy and just braces. And then I'll roll my will soon.

Ah, because it's a new guy. He passes. He passes. Passes. All right, so comes out of a rage, perhaps. Probably didn't even have... I only have four rounds. Okay, and it's round four, so...

This is the last round of rage. You are deraged. No, I'm still raging through this round, right? I rage in round four. Oh, yeah. Yeah, all Okay, that's round four. This is the last round of rage. You are deraged. I'm still raging through this round, right? I rage in round one. Oh, yeah. That's fine. So, yeah, if he does the charge, the rage should count. All right, so this thing sees you brace down.

Obviously, he doesn't want to see that because you're doing it in the motion of this happening. He's acting like he's not bracing. Right, right, right. He's like, oh, look, it's the lovely valley. I just rolled my spear in the brace Do you want me to roll a bluff on that brace check? I love Pathfinder! Alright, seeing its friend fail to bull rush anyone off the bridge

This friend who had this magical power to do earth glide It walks up to Umlo and attempts to grapple Umlo. Attack of opportunity? Attack of opportunity. Let me see what the reach is. It's got 10 foot reach. He has 15 feet.

Moving from 15 to 10 is enough. Roll your attack of opportunity. Daddy 18. Oh, he got him! He died before the grapple. Roll your attack of opportunes. Natty, 18. Oh, he got him! Oh, nice. He died before the grapple. Troy's so sad. 24 points of damage.

26 points of damage. Nice. There you go. 26 points of damage. He is in very, very bad shape. Attempts to grapple, which will provoke again, but does... I'm going to have to come back. No, he can't attack there. because he's too close to me.

Attempts to grapple. 24 against your, well, excuse me, no. 34 against your CMD. Yes. Grapples. UMS! 10 feet away from the edge of the bridge. And it is Sir Will's turn. Sir Will, you see this guy

grab UMS. Yep. Sir Will now you see this guy grab umps. Yep. Sir Will now has a clear line to do a full ride-by, a nice clean side tilt. Sure do. So he will ride-by, do a tilting charge, and then move on past the target. And just to mix it up a little, he's going to do a little, For the rose! And? And the light!

And the grant. I wasn't sure when to join in. I thought, do I do it after him? For the rose! And the light! All right't sure when to join in. Do I do it after him? For the rose! And the lights! Alright, good. He rides by and tilts his high beret lance. 25 to hit. 25 is a hit.

Beauty miss. Oh my god. He does 9 points of damage. I rolled 2 ones and a 2. 9 points of damage. Takes 9. Still going. And it is Nine points of damage. Oh. I rolled two ones and a two. Not as good. Nine points of damage. Okay. Takes nine. Still going.

And it is Della's turn. Uh, okay. Uh, Della is going to... Okay, yeah. So she's going to come up and stand next to Umlo. So she's going to be adjacent to grappled Umlo. And she's going to cast a little spellled Umlo, and she's going to cast a little spell that I used in our

cane pool pointer. That's way... Get out of here. I like it. I like it. That's way past your first move increment. I was like 25 feet away, wasn't I? No, you were behind that giant. Umlo moved up. You're like 45 feet away. Matthew, stop cheating.

I can still cast a spell, Lotus, won't get the benefits Okay, so This spell is called Siphon Might Yes It's from the Giant Hunter's Handbook So I drain the might Of the target and transfer that power To another creature

Oh my god, that's awesome So you get a fortitude save for half, but it's going to be 1d6 plus 4 strength damage. Wow! Holy crap! And if I were standing next to an ally, I could transfer it, but I'm just going to transfer it to myself.

What a spectacular spell. What's the save? It's a level 3 spell, so dc 17. Fortitude, you said? Fortitude. You're probably going to make it. Still, even half of that is great. It made it. It's a level three spell, so DC 17. Four to two, you said? Four to two. All right. So you're probably going to make it. Probably make the save. Still even half of that is great. Yeah.

Made it. There's a good roll. Yeah. It made it. So. Okay. So it was six. Three points of strength damage.

Three points of strength damage. Oh my goodness. And I get it. And you get them. Get in there with that scimitar. That is cool. Right? Isn't that a cool spell?

Yeah. And you can do it. That's very cool. Oh yeah, because you have weapon finesse. Weapon finesse. But we can give her some heavy shit to carry, yo. Yep. Yo, carry this heavy armor.

Yo, help me move this piano. Carry this banded mail. Just throws it at him. Carry this banded mail. All right, so three points of strength damage, you said? Yeah. All right, so if he rests tonight, I'll be fine tomorrow. It's a penalty to strength.

It's not damage. Okay, fair enough. I've a penalty to strength. It's not damage. Okay. Fair enough. I've added it to my age lab. Baron, you're far away from this guy. I want to clarify this. Oh, boy. Just real quickly.

Killing the momentum. Deadshot full round action. Up close to deadly. Has no move action associated with it. You're able to spend an extra point. It's fine. Just FYI. Okay.

Thank you. I appreciate you clarifying. So Baron, level zero spell, Charm Monster. No, he's going to move. It's a good spell. Take a bow. Take a bow. So Baron is going to spend a

grit point to resolve. He's outside of his range increment, but he's going to resolve against Touch Ace. He is still. Because of Log Shot? He's outside of his range increment, but he's going to resolve against touch AC still. Because of log shot? No, no, no. He's inside 60 feet.

So that is with one range increment out of my current range. But that would mean that I would not resolve against touch AC. Regular AC. I am spending a grip point in order to... Your last grip point. Still... Nope, I got a grip point back. No, because he killed the other guy. Oh, because you killed.

That's right. Yeah. That's what's so great about killing. Yeah. All right, so you're going to spend your last grip point to do what? No, not my last grip point. You're going to spend a grip point to do what? Don't try to trick me out of this.

Sorry. In order to attack against his touch AC. Ah, and what is that deed called? Cheat and grant? EX. It's called cheat and grant. It's one of the advanced players, guys. It's an exceptional ability.

It's the card cheat from Munchkin? It's called Deadeye. So I could technically, it also does not have a move action, so I could do, like, targeting Deadeye and up close and dead. Well, actually, I'd have to be in a ranging run, but I could. I already hate it. Go ahead. Natural 20. Oh my god! It's over.

It is over. Critical threat. Critical threat. Critical. Critical. Critical threat. Boom. A 14 to confirm. That is not a confirm, so it's max. It's against touch. Oh, against touch.

Damn it all, it's a confirm. Yeah! Time for a fan critical. And I'm assuming you don't misfire on confirm rolls for criticals, right? Yeah. Roll a d20 and a d4. Add those up. What do you got? Oh, come on. Grant. Add those up. What do you got?

Oh, come on. Grant. It's classic. It has to happen every round. 19. 19. 19 it is. All right, this is John from Colorado Springs.

All right, John. Hey. Hey, John. Right in the mumble box, your projectile pierces through the vocal cords, causing double damage and 1d4 charisma damage. Oh, wow. That's already pretty ugly.

Also, for 1d3 days, it has a 50% spell failure chance for spells with vocal cords. That's what's really going to hurt it. Yeah, it's really going to hurt it. That'll teach him. So that's four times damage. Yep. Four times damage, but I want you to really describe it to me, Grant. Oh, yeah.

Right in the mumble box. Oh, my God. You guys should see what he just rolled. He rolled so much. It's Grant rolling. Is it really that surprising? Baron says, I don't even hear you talk, but I never want to hear your damn voice again. Cleverly and closely aims after spending a bit of his grit.

You can see it leave his body. Just a little bit of him die. The finger touches the trigger ever so gently and pulls it back with precision. Unknown to dwarven kind until this very moment. And hits him right in his mumble box. Right for 35 points of damage. And his neck explodes. His giant, misshapen Easter Island head just falls off of his body.

Thank you, John, for Colorado Springs. Thanks, John. Is the body still hugging Umlo? The body just like limply lets Umlo go, and Umlo falls to his death. Awesome. It's funny how that happens. Oh, that was great. Oh, man.

Nicely done. I saw that. That's a 20 hit. Wow. Oh, wow. It's not even a big dice thing. See, I do it on other dice. Yeah.

I done tried to kill you. I done tried. Grant, I don't think you know how many emails I have sent back to people where my sign-off has been, may you roll like Grant. All right. You've killed these giants. Oh, man. I thought for sure this encounter was going to be minimum two episodes.

Yeah. Charm Monster. Charm Monster, man. That is amazing. Go about your day. So close. What I wrote was DC 19 or something?

DC 17. I miss it by one. Yeah, I think it was 19. Yeah. So, you know, back outside

the cathedral, you guys feel safe for the moment. Everyone may have their own hesitations on how good of an idea that was. Because now this giant is going back to his guard friends, maybe acting a little bit differently,

maybe keeping everything to himself. Yeah. Because he's embarrassed about not knowing what he saw. Well, I also told him specifically to... Right, he heard a voice in his head, so maybe he doesn't want to talk about it. Maybe if he said that he was hearing voices or something like that,

and he thought maybe it was like Minderhall or something, Orathash would just like, kill him as a heretic, burn him at the stake. Right. Because Orathash clearly doesn't have any inspiration from his god. Right. He's a loser, the poser.

He's going to do what his friend asked him to do, which is pretend that none of this ever happened. So he walks away. Yeah. But for the first time since you were up on the top of the middle spire and the giant came up with the bear looking around, you guys feel like maybe your position isn't the safest.

Oh, okay. Back on the bridge, what the hell's going on with that giant that blended into the bridge? Knowledge check? Yeah, can we examine his body, see if he has any items on him that might have triggered it?

Now that he's down, you notice he's dressed differently than the other giant. He appears to be wearing some sort of robe that is emanating magical energy. I wonder if he's a sorcerer, a druid, or something. Sir Will would like to do a spellcraft check. Sure. He never gets to do it. For a good reason. Seven.

Perhaps you should let one of the people better at it. You're like, nothing to see here and you throw the robe over. Yeah, I throw it off the thing. He's like, it's worthless, Baron. Don't waste your time. No, stop talking. Della, as part of your continued training as my deputy i feel it's

about time to give you another touch of law 22 on the smoke ground della you look at this brown and gray robe which when you were fighting him didn't think much of it and you realize maybe it's something you read about or your father told you about. Who knows? But it's known as a Zorn robe. Oh, wow. It's a very powerful, magical item. I know what that is. The back and the chest and the shoulder is decorated with a gem-like eye pattern. The wearer gains a plus five bonus on perception checks.

Wow. a plus five bonus on perception checks. Wow. And can use Earthglide to pass through up to 20 feet of natural or worked stone per day. Distance traveled with Earthglide does not need to be consecutive, but it must be used in five foot increments. Cool.

The wearer is able to safely chew, swallow, digest, and derive nutrition from gems, precious metals, and derive nutrition from gems, precious metals, and metallic ore, with a hundred gold pieces worth of these materials sustaining him for one full day. If he removes the robe after one such meal, he is sickened until 24 hours

have passed since the last meal of this kind. Wow. Now have the very strange, very powerful, and very expensive item. Is it giant-sized? Could we wear it and not look like

the Sorcerer's Apprentice? Was he a fat guy in a little coat? Fat guy in a little coat. I mean, for the purposes of this... Baron has clothespins. We can pin it up. Pin the sleeves back.

Yeah, you're fine. It's a robe. We can have it. You can have it. You're fine. You can have it. That's awesome. Nice.

Cool. Azorn is a creature that derives its nutrition from eating precious gems and metals. Oh, wow. And can pass through stone. This shit is so cool. Yeah. can pass through stone. This shit is so cool.

Yeah. In the distance you see that on the other side of the bridge it's connecting to a worn path on the far side. And if you look at the path you see that it splits in two directions.

And Sir Will, you don't know if it's the feeling of this day of ascension and this hard-fought battle on the bridge that you have emerged victorious from, but you feel this great spirit within you.

In fact, all of you feel that as you go up to tenth level. Oh! We'll see you next week. Yay! I love you, Troy! Troy, Troy, Troy, Troy, Troy, Troy, Troy, Troy.

Eggman. Unbelievable. Yeah, Troy Eggman. Touchdown. Unbelievable. The Glass Cannon Podcast is a Powerhouse and Tate production and is an officially licensed partner of Paizo Incorporated. Giant Slayer is copyright 2015. Giant Slayer and the Pathfinder Adventure Path are trademarks of Paizo.

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