The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 126 - Sunday in the Park with Forge

Episode Date: October 24, 2017

They've explored Minderhal's Valley top to bottom, the ancient relics have been gathered and the time has come to light the forge. Will the party go through with it and what obstacles still stand in the way regardless of their decision?!!? For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on the Glass Cannon Podcast. Well, pleasantries aside, let's get down to business. A ritual begins. We're wasting time. Della pulls out the clay. Yeah, let's do this. Tell me what to do. Shrouded in doubt. Why must we light it?

To defeat them. We can defeat them without lighting the forge. And deception. She's lying to you. She's trying to bring back an evil power. He looks at Pembroke and realizes that it was all a lie. The team must join together. It's been a while since we've seen this guy in combat.

Ladies and gentlemen, Pembroke the Potent. Yes! For the beginning of the end. Your friends are dead, and soon you will be. Fight us! The battle for Minderhall's cathedral begins. Followers of Minderhall, you've chosen poorly. Now. R.I.P.

Razzmatazz the Bold. Oh, man. Such a sad day in GCP Nation last week. We lose our very own Razzmatazz. I just had to pour one out for Razz, my man. Gonna miss that guy. What's going on, everybody? It's your old friend Joe O'Brien here welcoming you to episode 126 of the Glass Cannon podcast. And today, I just want to talk about Twitch for a

second, actually. I know a lot of you guys out there know about Twitch and subscribe to us on Twitch, and to you, we are extremely grateful. But I think there's also some people out there that don't really know about it. It's a video game streaming service that really turned into a lot more than just video games. Board gaming, card gaming, really anything. You can just live stream through Twitch, and we have used it for a long time now. Troy did a great Dark Souls 3 series. There was also, now these days, it's mostly Skid and Grant are on there frequently playing video games, interacting with listeners. You can jump on, hang out with GCP Nation, exchange comments on recent episodes without

being too spoiler heavy, of course. But the main thing that we have heard from viewers over the past year or more of us Twitching is that they would love to have a more regular Twitch time where they know we're going to be on and they can plan around it, jump on and watch us Twitch. Well, I'm here today to tell you that it is happening. As of Friday, November 24th at 8 o'clock p.m., we are going to be twitching every single Friday night at 8 o'clock Eastern Time. Book it. Put it in your schedule. Be there. We're going to have a good time. Now, if Skid can't happen to do it that week, Gran will do it. If Grant can't do it, I'll be on. If I can't do it, Troy will be there.

Matthew is, he doesn't play video games. He's too much of an important adult person. But the rest of us will be there, and I'm sure we'll get Matthew on at least here and there to partake. So put it in your schedules the week after PAX Unplugged because we're already booked Friday night, November 17th. Don't forget that. Also on Twitch, incidentally, 7.30 p.m. You can watch a live stream of GCP Live on November 17th. But the week after, Thanksgiving weekend, November 24th, is going to kick off our weekly Twitch game.

Also, regarding Twitch, I don't know if you guys have ever heard of Extra Life before. I had heard of it, but I had never really participated in it at all. It is a charity that donates to children's hospitals nationwide. And what they do is they try to get one day in the fall, a Saturday in the fall, where they try to get nerd gamers worldwide to stream on Twitch for 24 hours straight to get donations for children's hospitals. Well, we are participating this year and I could not be more excited. On Saturday, November 4th, we are going to Twitch for 24 straight hours. That's right. GCP Nation nonstop all day, starting Friday night into Saturday at midnight and going for 24 straight hours until midnight Saturday into Sunday.

And let's be honest, I don't think we'll be able to just shut it off at midnight, right? We might get 25 hours, 26. Who knows? But either way, we are going to be on and we are going to be doing our best to try to get donations for our various children's hospitals that we are supporting. So we encourage you guys to not only come out and check us out, but if you can, donate to our team and we will rack up points and be able to donate all of the proceeds. And they're tax deductible, of course. All of the proceeds, and they're tax deductible, of course, all of those proceeds go to Extra Life, who I believe last year they raised $9 million that went to children's hospitals. So this is definitely a cause that we are excited to be behind, excited to partake in.

And if you can donate anything, a buck, doesn't matter, tune in, donate, show us your support. We would really appreciate it. I think there's more info on the Facebook page if you want to check that out. That's all I got for this week, guys. I'm excited to get into episode 126 here. We have left off with what must be the beginning of the lighting of the forge. And I cannot wait for you to see what happens here. Enjoy episode 126, Sunday in the Park with Forge. I was just coming back from

the restroom to sit down to start recording, and I overheard Matthew talking to Joe about, you know, like a rest or something, you know, my spells, and I just couldn't help but laugh to myself when I looked at Matthew. I'm like, I'm not sure what you're talking about, but you know Della has no

spells left, and will not be able to get them back before the end of book three. Matthew and I looked at Matthew and I'm like, I'm not sure what you're talking about, but you know Della has no spells left and will not be able to get them back before the end of book three. Matthew and I had a fundamental different understanding of what happened at the end of last episode. He was like, well, we don't have to rest before Light of the Forge. I was like, I think this is it, man. I think we're at the show. I was like, they've been waiting 200 years.

They can't wait another night. And then Troy literally said, yeah, there's no way. There's just no way? Once again, your hands are tied. What can you do? Name me one thing Troy as a Dungeon Master could do to rectify this. Nothing. Nothing? Literally nothing.

What control does he have? None. Pembroke found out from Isseus that tonight is the night. And so you have the opportunity to move in this evening. Now, you did not need to cast 70 of your spells before you got into the forge heart. That's true. That's my argument. I think we could have just walked across the open field for two miles to get to the cathedral without casting any spells.

And we would have been fine. You did it before? Well, we stealthed before. Was there any casting of spells? No. Some of these casted fly, vanish, so some spells have been burned. Wait, wait. Last week when we were doing this episode

and you knew what was going to happen, were you just sitting there just like cackling internally? Oh, I was just like, fools. Last week when we were doing this episode and you knew what was going to happen, were you just sitting there just like cackling internally? Oh, I was just like, fools. What? Fools? Just burning spells thinking they're going to get to rest. Matthew, how are you guys going to get back to camp? You're going to have to come up with some interesting way. Maybe the spellcasters should

have a conversation. I don't know. I'm just the GM. It was classic poor planning. Don't worry about Matthew. I have that hand of stone. I have tremor sense. It's good. It's going to save us all.

Oh, man, that tremor sense. That'll be it. That's so mighty. Mightiest artifact in all of Galarian. So useful and awesome. Well, I know. I'm very interested. Like, if Baron didn't have his gun, what does he do?

What happens when you're not allowed to do what you're used to doing? It forces you as a character to have to find another way. And here, with all of your backs completely up against the wall, about to face Minderhall knows what. You're literally going to have to reach into your bag of tricks deeper than you've ever reached before. This is true. So, humor me, if if you will for a moment oh boy just imagine complete emptiness silence you don't hear anything blackness and then all of a sudden like footsteps echoing down a hallway they get louder and louder and louder

and then the sound of the footsteps is overtaken by what sounds like crying yeah definitely crying and it's a woman crying. Not like sobbing uncontrollably, but like maybe protesting. And the footsteps are getting closer and closer to that sound.

All of a sudden the door opens up and it's opened by a small hand of a halfling. It's a much, much younger Sir Will. You know, it's hard to tell where, you know, he always looks kind of young. Is this a teenage version of him? Is he even younger than that, 11, 8? Very, very young, he opens the door and sees his father standing there sternly looking towards him. And his mother, seated at a table behind the father, just kind of head in her hands, crying.

His adoptive father, Emmett Keswick, motions for Will to sit. Will does as he's told. Willamette, there comes a time in every boy's life where he must decide what kind of man he is going to become. Today is that day for you. Your mother and I have decided

to send you away to a special boarding school for halflings. Now, before you say anything, I know you have dreams of being a knight someday, but you must understand that this school came to us. They've heard that you survived a dragon attack when you were but an infant, and they believe, through their powerful seers and wizards they have at this school, that you are unique and special.

The headmaster himself has come here to meet you. And barring any unforeseen circumstances, your mother and I believe that you will be accepted and you will go to this school and make the Keswick name proud you can see in Will's face he's like

this isn't a man that you say no to his father loves him the mother obviously has a soft spot for Will but Will kind of says something to the effect like but what about my brothers? They're training to be knights. Friedrich and Benric, they're going to get to do that.

I want to do that too. That sort of thing. And the father just, Emmett says, this is a special opportunity. Do you understand the importance of that? Your mother and I both believe

that you were given to us as a gift from Ayomide herself. We need you to live up to that gift. If an opportunity like this comes along, you must take it. I'll hear no more protestations from you or you kind of side glances at the mother

young Willamette like his eyes are starting to maybe water but he doesn't want to show weakness in front of his father so he just kind of nods eyes down at the ground and he says the headmaster

Dr. Forsythe is in the sitting room next door you be good Willamette be strong and represent the Keswick name

with pride Willamette pulls himself together walks to the door and goes to open it and then we pan back out to see a much older, now Sir Will, standing in the forge heart with a bunch of people. Della, Nestor, Pembroke, Baron, Nestor, Pembroke, Baron, Aram,

Atena, Farron, and Dublo. Atena has told you what you need to do. She's just standing there with that haze over her eyes, looking at all of you.

I notice you have some new members in your group. I sense great power from you, she looks at Pembroke. What is your name, sir? I, um, sorry. Dressed it off for a moment. at Pembroke. What is your name, sir? I... Sorry. Drifted off for a moment. My name is Pembroke.

And where are you from, Pembroke? You know, it's interesting. I don't fully recall. Although most recently I was on the staff as faculty at the Arcanarium in Absalom. That's before. That came long after me. I'm not familiar with it. Oh, it's a wonderful school.

I can give you some information on it if you like. That's fine. That'll be fine. But perhaps that's where this great power that I see around you has come from. Thank you. I wonder what part you'll have to play in all of this when all is said and done. Yes, I'm a bit curious about that as well. And you, where I sense great power in him. I sense great sadness in you. She points at Aram.

I feel as if you've lost everything. I'm very sorry for everything that you have lost. Aram's like, thank you, thank you, I appreciate it. Hopefully we'll be able to rebuild if we can get out of here alive. I feel confident in these men and this young woman here. They've saved my life. And I believe they will help you in what you seek. Well, pleasantries aside, let's get down to business.

The first thing you'll need to do to relight the forge is to line the bottom of the forge heart here with the sacred clay. Then you would place the fire geodes inside. That's the easy part. The next part would prove to be more difficult. Do you have the Drake's Bane horn on you? I do. May I see it?

I've only heard tales of it. Look, but don't touch. Baron pulls it out and holds it in both of his hands like a full cornucopia. How long is the Drake's Bane horn? It might even be taller than you. I thought it was like seven feet. Seven pounds.

Oh, seven pounds. Seven pounds. But it's a big horn. It's big. It encumbers me. I'm thinking Baron's ready to do a Ricola ad after this. So she kind of like reaches her hands out and she's not like

she's looking past you with her eyes that don't ever really focus on anything and tries to take the horn. Do you give it let her take it? Baron, no!

She's awake! I say let me hold on to this for the time being. You just need to instruct us how to use this. I don't think you need to hold it, Atena. Look with your eyes, not with your hands.

I understand you've given a lot to bring these artifacts back here. Almost died, in fact. Almost died, I bet you did. For centuries I've waited to see these things. Now my eyesight is all but gone, but I sense the great power. I've sensed it ever since

you came into this cathedral. Well, anyways, once the geodes are in here, we will all go upstairs. Why, I haven't been upstairs in hundreds and hundreds of years. But I must feel the flames on my face when the forge is relit we will go upstairs and blow the horn to hopefully call a dragon into the cathedral

one of you or more must stand in front of the sacred forge and withstand its breath of fire so that the fire may travel all the way down into the forge heart

and light the geodes after that no doubt you will have to dispose of the dragon then all of us together will join hands And recite

The blessing of Rosag Joining together as one In Minderhall's name And bring back his power on earth On earth Not earth Galarian What is this place you've become?

Last I was upstairs it was Earth. Now it's some crazy fake Earth. Some fantasy Earth. You damn dirty apes. You blew it up. It was Galarian all along. Let me ask you. When you came back into the cathedral

And snuck down here Was there anyone else upstairs? There were We may have distracted them With a former companion Who died valiantly To allow us to Get down here with

Subterfuge Died valiantly kicking somebody in the nuts. That's about a valiant of death I can think of, Bella. She closes her eyes and kind of turns her head over towards the slag

and just opens them and looks into the slag and again you see nothing. It's just black. But she sees something in there. She looks back at you guys, eyeing Pembroke and Aram, the newcomers. Looks over at Willamette and gives a smile. Willamette's not smiling.

Della, she looks at and gives a very terrifying look at Della Della winks she doesn't see it she's blind alright I always forgot that part and then Baron she looks at and she just kind of looks down on both of you

she says I believe they're still up there they must be disposed of Before we can call forth the dragon Now you must understand This is all going to happen very quickly Am I correct that you've fought a dragon before? Yes, we did

How did you fare? You might say poorly Well, were there this many in your party last time? Yes, we did. How did you fare? You might say poorly. Well, were there this many in your party last time? No, there were not. Well, then there's a chance. Let us go upstairs after the clay has been lined and the geodes put in, and deal with these guardians.

Then, when you are ready, we'll open the doors and call the dragon. Before we go upstairs to fight the giants, Pembroke would like to cast a spell, or two spells. Next, Baron, could you Pembroke would like to cast a spell or two spells. Is it?

Next, Baron, could you your bullets, your arrows, could you gather them all in one place quickly, just for a moment? All right. The cartridge is, but here you go. That's fine. Put them all in my hat. And he casts

a flame arrow on, so 25 arrows, 25 bullets. And he casts Flame Arrow. So 25 arrows, 25 bullets. We'll each get an additional 1d6 points of fire damage when they're fired for the next seven hours or something. Great. And Baron turns to Nestor. Hold on a second. Go ahead.

Did you want any bolts fired up? Yeah, are you going to fire some? From the Dragon's Bane crossbow, like in the event The Giant's Bane crossbow. What did I say? You said Dragon's Bane. Yeah, the Giant's Bane crossbow. Yeah, sure. It's 70 minutes, by the way.

You might as well just get a couple of them because I barely have time to reload. I'll do 20. Let's do 20 bullets, 5 bolts. Okay. Wait, wait, wait. 21 bullets. Three and a half bolts.

And my kneecap. Break this bolt in half. But I turn to Nestor and I remind him, I don't know if you've noticed, but we've been gelling a lot in combat lately. It's time to jump out of the frying pan and into the fire, Nestor. Yeah, no, I like that analogy. Baron, don't allow your excitement for this upcoming battle to cloud your vision. You've... you've prayed to Torag.

You, Umlo, you wish to stand around in this circle and... awaken Minderhall? Pray in his name? Ex ne on their array, pray. Umlo, explain this to me. Cleric. Be cool, Sotapal. Be cool, Will.

I've been doing a lot of thinking about Torag lately You sound like one of the Beatles I'm John Lennon Imagine if we could all just Next level is barred for Umlo The back of the world ruled by dragons No but I'm Umlo

Always have been always always will be. And I can tell you one thing. I can feel. All you need is love? Sorry. I couldn't resist. They have a really long catalog, so if you want to spend the next half hour

making Beatles jokes. I'm in. There will be no shortage. I love Stalin. Oh, boy. Help! Please, please me and do this. Why don't we do it in the road?

So, no one will be watching us. I can feel... God damn it. Now I can't do the accent. You could do it before. I know, I know. I'm just trying to differentiate it. This kid is so angry.

You never could do it. Let's be honest. What are you saying, Pablo? I can feel Nogrim Steelhand's strength running through me at this very moment. And I know that in the same way he struck down many powerful giants in his time,

we have a chance to strike at the heart of the valley before it can spread across this land. And if I live, if I die, nothing will stop me from attempting to do this. It's the only way I can get one step close to Ingrahild,

and be that through defeat or through victory, I will take that step through that door. Why must we light it to defeat them? We have defeated everything we've come across. We can defeat them without lighting the forge. Nesta, I've seen you lay out amazing amounts of destruction across this entire valley. You do not need them. You can do it on your own.

You, Baron, can do it with the help of Torag. I, with the guidance of Iomedae. That is all we need. She's lying to you. She's trying to bring back an evil power. Will's getting kind of hysterical. Mate, if I'm being honest, your precious Yomadai, that's dialectical, by the way, so I'm allowed to do it.

It's my Yomadai. Now, she basically abandoned you and us, so I don't know where this attachment is. It's a little sad, honestly. It's a little bit of battered syndrome. But me, I think that Mendenhall, that's the new thing. I'm all about Mendenhall now. So I think we should put our trust in Mendenhall.

Ah, yes, Rashad Mendenhall. Yeah. My favorite god of... Atena kind of ambles her way over to Sir Will and stands over him. And now she's old, decrepit, but she towers over you. Yeah. Just kind of leans down. Says, hi.

Seems as if you're having a crisis of faith, little man. Do you not want to save your brother? Do you not want to accept Minderhall as your savior? I will not be tempted anymore by your lies. You will do nothing for my brother. I know this. Your god is evil. Explain to me, once and for all, why you want to light this forge. For some reason other than pure curiosity. You don't know the power you are unleashing.

I have sat in here for centuries waiting for warriors such as yourself to do this. I'm lighting that forge with or without you. But I tell you,

young man, you don't want to choose Minderhall. So be it. Does he speak for all of you? Can I do... Nestor wants to do one last sense motive on her

oh 30 30 sense motive what did you get Della 91 well Della you completely believe her. And Nestor, you... No, 33, sorry.

So, Nestor, you definitely feel as if she's holding something back, but it doesn't seem to be... It also comes from her not fully understanding what power she's unleashing. Well, Sir Will wants to respond. You told us that we had to light the forge, that we were these scions, that I was Rosag reincarnated. Now you say

you will light the forge with or without us. Well, if you don't choose to light it, if you don't choose to accept Minderhall, then perhaps I was wrong. There's seven of you here now. I think. Yeah. Party of seven.

Everybody make a noise. Perhaps I was wrong about you, Sir Willamette. Maybe someone else here is Rosag reincarnated. Maybe it's your wise friend here who understands the power of Minderral and is ready to choose it but if you don't want to go that way it's your loss but unfortunately i believe

it's your brother's loss too sorry can i be more than one person or or is it just one-to-one? Can I be both? I'm willing to be both. What do you mean? If it'll help. Can I be Adirondacks and the other one that he was supposed to be? Or is it only like you can only be one person?

I'm more than willing to take them. Adiromi and Roseanne? Sure. Of course you could. That's what she'll tell you now. She spreads this around to whoever she feels like. Anyone's a scion. Any given day of the week.

I thought you were immune to fear, Sir Will. I get you so fear power. She's out of spells, but she's got a lot of sick burns. That was 1d4. That was good. That was good. That's a t-shirt right there. Ah, yes. Della, if it is your wish to light this forge, and all of you agree, you may light it.

I will see it lit, and I will defeat whatever evil comes at us for it. You said exactly why we have to light this forge, Sir Will. We have to draw into single combat the leader that is driving these giants together to rip them apart. Yeah, mate. Go draw them out. We can't fight through. We snuck into this temple on a day we understood it to be empty because we know that we are not capable of fighting through everyone. We have to find a way to engage in single combat those that oppose us.

If you want to draw Runefash here, if he's the reason you've come, light that forge, and he'll come. And Brander. You said he would come if we lit the forge. Will he? If he's the one that holds Aggramosh? Absolutely.

You're surrounded by wisdom, little halfling. You might be wise to listen to them. I'm surrounded by a lack of faith. And he looks at Baron dead in the eye and then turns away and he's not interested in further debate. He's good. You guys doing what you got to do? He said his piece. Baron fiddles his internal spells

And the love that he still enjoys from his god While Sir Will walks away In answer to your question Do I believe you could be both Adorome and Rosag? No, I don't believe so But I could have got it wrong the first time Well, it's just a suggestion I mean, if there's

I'm just trying to be helpful. All I know is the prophecy said the four scions would return. Would return with the pieces needed to relight the forge. The pieces are here. We're wasting time. Della pulls out the clay. Yeah, let's do this. Tell me what to do.

Just start working the clay into the bottom of the... Is that what I'm... She needs to get up in there and stretch out and just start... Yeah, it's just like lining the furnace. Oh, it's all the way down? We don't have to move anywhere? Well, the first two steps happen down here, and then you're

going to go upstairs. So Della's just lining the clay. She starts smothering it along the walls. Getting all over your hands. You wish you had a spell that could line clay quicker but you've used them all. Nestor comes up behind her like Patrick Swayze and starts

intertwining his hands with hers. Della immediately stands up. Other side of the room please. I said no. I thought you liked that film. I'm sorry stands up. Other side of the room, please. Now. I said no. I thought you liked that film. I'm sorry.

I was just doing an homage. I'll stand over there if it helps. Farron says, what a beautiful vase. Doesn't he die at the end of that movie? Or the beginning of that movie? You guys are the beginning of the film. He's invincible for the rest of it. So Della lines the clay.

And then she says, now who has the geodes? Oh, I've got, yeah, no, me. I've got them. Yes, bring them here. Right, there you go. Dumps them out. Be careful! Everyone dives for cover.

She's blind, so she goes to grab a geode and she grabs Lexington and throws it in. It's a very irregularly shaped geode. No, she puts the geodes in with Farron's help. I think you had three of them, right? Com! Com! Com! All right. Farron and I will come up with you.

Farron, please give me your hand I'm scared I'm scared to go up there after so many years How many did you say there were up there? Three Three, yes Well, you need a plan

in order to take them out There are seven of you, you should be able to take them out there are seven of you you should be able to handle yourselves but Urufash's recruits are quite strong what's your plan well I think that what

my idea is to go up and start shooting at them and hitting them in various parts of their body with my arrows until they sort of fall over and stop breathing that's my plan a sound plan to be sure he sounds like he's joking but they didn't seem like they had any ranged attacks so if we can pick them off from a distance that's a big old chaplain there they might takes a lot of damage before they get in close enough to hurt us. So we can all stand back and pounce on them when they get within range. Adela pulls out her longbow.

I'm with you. And I have a couple of protective spells that may be useful before we start this endeavor as well. Farron speaks up and it's like there are a lot of pews that are quite high both in the front around the forge and then in the back in the nave area

if you're going to be using your bow and what not just be aware they'll get cover partial cover or full cover? I think full cover, depending on where you're standing. We can make our way up to the choir loft where we fought those. No, that's a good idea. Get some high ground, yeah?

I like that. And leave her. Oh, yeah, the choir loft, that's where you fought Ruddig Headstomper when he turned into the Earth Elemental. You could definitely get up there. You might be able to sneak over there and shoot down at them. They're going to get, I mean, they're so far away from there

if you're just looking at the map. But the ranged attackers can definitely get a better line over there. Yeah, so why don't we do it? Yeah, and Baron will equip his giant spank crossbow if we're going to have that much distance, because that'll give him some time to reload if we're going to start that far away.

So we'll stay on the ground and just wait until something gets close and then charge. Della turns to Robin and says, stay with us. Who should I stay near? Probably the ones going to the high ground, yes. That would be wise.

But won't they be safe? Won't I need to use my healing powers on those who get in the thick of the battle? Stay near Nesta. I will stay near Nesta. Anyone who needs healing can come to you. Alright, so when you head up the stairs there, you know once you come out of the secret door in the statue

that you are above the ground here. Dimension-wise, the slag pit, you don't know how deep it goes because there's all solid slag underneath it, but the dais where the statue of Minderhall is, that leads to a little pathway that also leads, there's a little pathway from the dais that leads to where the sacred forge is, which is also raised up on the same height as the dais where the statue is. In terms of actual mechanics of how high up that is,

it's 15 feet above the sanctuary floor. you know, actual mechanics of how high up that is. It's 15 feet above the sanctuary floor. Where we are right now. Yeah, when you get upstairs, you'll be 15 feet above where they're standing, but they're behind, you know, the first layer of pews surrounding the forge. So can we not just get there? Do we have to, are they going to like see us before we get there? No, you can get there.

We can just go to the choir loft. But once you start moving is when you've got to decide how you're going to sneak. So we do have to sneak to get to the choir loft. To the choir loft? Yeah, but you're going to have a very – they're going to get a ton of bonuses because they're still probably searching Raspidaz's body. Okay. All right, so you go upstairs. And, you know, Farron just gingerly helps

Atena up, and you see Atena's face, like, lighting up with both fear and excitement of leaving. Imagine she just stayed down there for hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of years. And she's coming up to see her life's work come to fruition.

So though you may not agree with her, I think there can be an appreciation for what this moment means to her. You guys get upstairs. And you can obviously go to the right down the stairs and then up the choir loft, or you can go to the left and come around. Do you guys want to split up um i think maybe what if we sent everybody up the choir loft sneaky style and then sir will went the complete opposite way around the other side of the pews and made a ruckus you could drew them and then just slowly drew them to the uh the choir loft yeah you can outrun them with lexington right

yeah so buy a little time but oh but me the money mary chase yeah exactly and then i'll come back up on the altar back over the other side and the whole time you can just be shooting from afar at least nester can It worked really well for the last guy that did this, so go for it. Who did the, oh. Razzmatazz. Yeah. Well, I'm not as stupid as Razzmatazz. You're just

as ugly. He had a solid battle plan. Scythe and then kick him in the nuts. Yeah. Yeah, but also I think that you guys should start sneaking and I should start going over to the other side all at the same time because I'm going to start making noise inevitably.

Give us a little head start. Can Aram or Yoram, what is it? Y or A? Aram. Aram. Can Aram stealth with us? Yes, I think he'd better. I'll stay close to Nestor as I was told. I'm just curious if he's adept at stealthing or if it's a totally untrained skill for him. No, I can sneak.

He's not, like, big. So once you get down the dais there, it's going to be pretty easy to get up to that choir loft, as long as they're not looking straight at the statue. And that little staircase is the only way up into the choir loft, right? As far as you know, yeah. Great. All right. Let's do it.

All right. All right. So everyone except Sir Will is going to go down the stairs and up. Yeah. And Sir Will's going to go down the other stairs the opposite way, hundreds of feet away, and try to draw the giant's attention to the other side of the church. Okay.

Cathedral. So you're up there. Everybody roll a perception check. 16 for Sir Will. Sorry. Go. 37. Is that Pembroke or Nestor?

That was Nestor. 24 for Della. 34 for Baron. And 34 for Baron, 26 for Umla. 34 for Baron. And 34 for Baron, 26 for Umla. 19 for Pembroke. 19 for Pembroke. All right, so you get up there and you see the two-headed green creature is kind of examining Razzmatazz's body and picking through it

while the other stone giant is attending to the other stone giant that got wounded by Razzmatazz before Razzmatazz was brutally murdered in 12 seconds. Yeah.

But they are busy and you guys can get up to the choir loft, no problem. Great. Sir Will, however, you need to sneak around. So give me a stealth check. Okay. Zero.

You rolled a zero. I rolled exactly zero. Okay. Adjusted. Sure. You would have the only d20 with a zero side on it oh boy alright so you guys all move to the choir loft

you can move your pieces there I'll move around luckily you get up there and there is no one else up there Sir Will you kind of clunk clunk clunk over there and

the two headed creature turns its head and kind of stands up from Razzmatazz's body and begins walking around the corner. All right. Are you moving him on the map? Yeah, I moved him about 15 feet or so. Okay. Still 100 feet away from you depending on this. And of course

Ferrin and Atena are right up next to the statue. Okay. Everybody Sir Will's going to try to peek up over the pew to the far end to see if it looks like people are in place. People are in place, right? Yeah.

You would think so. You don't see them on the dais anymore, and you're so low to the ground, even on top of Lexington, these creatures can't see you. We are nearly 200 feet away from these creatures. Yeah. Super, super far. All right, so what do you want to do, Sir Will? You're kind of in the pole position here.

Okay. Sir Will is going to slowly walk up with Lexington until he appears from behind the pew. So that he can see them. You just jetted forward.

And they can see him. Yeah, so this creature comes up and sees you. Yeah, so he turns, sees Sir Will, resplendent in his armor and banner of Highbury over his head. Not really fluttering because he's inside. Just kind of hanging down. And he's just like, followers of Minderhall, you've chosen poorly. Followers of Minderhall, you've chosen poorly.

I am a servant of Iomedae, and through me, she will work a destruction upon this cathedral unlike anything you've ever seen. Come, meet your doom. May all turn and look at you. Roll for initiative. Yeah, baby! Alrighty, everyone in the choir loft accepts her will. Roll for initiative. Yeah, baby! Alrighty. Everyone in the choir loft, except Sir Will. Theron and Atena on the dais, hidden in the shadow of the statue.

What did everyone get? Oh, I got to roll for Aram. Natural four. Okay, let's start with Pembroke. Ten. Pembroke the Potent. Ten. I forgot that was his title. Who's Umlo?

I'm Umlo. Do you remember the terrible beat-up thing that happened earlier? Oh, yes, yes. I forgot. Umlo got a ten as well with a plus two bonus. Okay. That got you beat, Pam? I have a plus one bonus, yes.

Oh, okay. Sir Willibot. Seven. Oh, boy. Not a good time bonus, yes. Okay. Sir Willibbett. Seven. Oh, boy. Not a good time to get seven. Baron. Natural ten for a 22. He's always bragging, Della.

24. Damn that gunslinger's initiative. Ooh, nest a coin. 25. Oh! It's all right. It's all right. Sir Will's drawing him in.

That's right. You're doing your job. Yeah, he's going to wait until the last possible minute. Okay. Round one. Nest a coin. Okay. So I am going to knock two arrows, do a quick study target against the two-headed troll.

I want to get him with my fire arrows. And just for our listeners at home, how far away are you? I'm 160 feet away. You know, the map is so big that there's a range-finding tool like in Roll20, but you're so far away that I can't read the numbers. It's too small. Yeah, it's 190. 190.

190. But with your bow, that's well in range. That's for second range increment. Okay, second range increment. And because you're on higher ground, they are not going to get any bonuses to cover. Great. All right, so study targets and two arrows,

and I'm going to fire. Aiming at the foremost stone giant? No, the troll. Oh, the troll. The two-headed troll. Oh, he's way far away. Okay. And that is going to be a 34 to hit. 34

flat-footed. Still definitely to hit. Oh my god. 42 points of damage. Oh, baby. Much of which is Fire and electricity That's right fire

Fire and electricity And my second shot Miss Miss on the second shot But that thing Just walking towards Sir Will Just gets an arrow Right between its right neck And its shoulder blade But that thing, what the fuck? Just walking towards Sir Will. What the fuck? Arrow like right between its right neck and its shoulder blade.

Son of a neck. Its right neck? Oh, that's right. He shot at the two-headed one. All right, Della. Della is going to take aim at the wounded guy. Ah, the foremost guy. Is he a troll? He is a stone giant. Foremost stone giant.

So I'm outside my first range and your miss was a minus two or minus one? Minus two, I believe. Minus dose. Miss. Oh, well, eleven. Flat-footed? Eleven flat-footed is a miss. And second shot, miss. Remind me what weapon you're using? Longbow.

Longbow. Have you ever used a longbow in combat? You forget when I shot the guy threatening Droja in the face. Oh, who could forget? Who could forget? That's all I'm saying. You, apparently. I did. That was the Orc's Bane arrow.

There's the Orc killing arrow. The Orc killing arrow. Baron. Baron gets excited at his compatriot taking a shot at the troll with his dual elements. And he says two can play at this game with his fire arrow bolt. It's a little confusing if you've got an arrow and a bolt in there. So you've got a fire arrow bolt. And now the crossbow has much less range.

It's 120 feet. 120 feet. Heavy crossbow. So it's just one ranging from it? One ranging right at the troll. Pitching it slightly higher and aiming at the troll. That's a 22 to hit.

22 is a hit. Yes! Alright. So that is a D10 plus 2D6 plus 3D6 actually. So wow, that's great. Wow. So wow, that's great. That's pretty good great that's pretty good didn't anticipate this so that is um that's a d8 by the way thank you for that holy shit i think his giant mid-sized

so that's 13 points of uh fire and arrow damage and then eight so 21 points total damage against that troll. Nice. 21 points total. Nice shot. I wish I could start loading a crossbow. Can you use half a round to start loading a heavy crossbow? Does that work? Alright, so pretty good opening volley there. And Baron's going to move 20 feet to the right as well. Okay, so

you are firing and then just moving along deeper into the balcony here. Yep. Okay. It is their turn. Starting with the stone giant in the middle. He's like, what is going on? First the red cap out of nowhere, then this.

And he just, with all haste, begins rushing towards the balcony. Mm. Okay. They're not falling for it, Lexington. I start playing the harpsichord madly to draw him in. Fools. Follow the harpsichord. Yes. The second one,

the one that perhaps landed the killing blow on poor little Razzmatazz. You see Razzmatazz's mangled body at the feet of this giant. He also double moves to get up in closer quarters,

and they both position themselves behind, you know, they kind of position themselves around the corner from where that side entrance is where Nestor snuck in. Yep. So now that second one that moved is actually, I don't even know if you guys can see it. You might be able to see it from over there. You know what I mean? It's kind of around the corner. Yeah. And the other one, yeah, now they're a little tougher to see. May You might be able to see it from over there. You know what I mean? It's kind of around the corner. Yeah. And the other one, yeah, now they're a little tougher to see.

May not even be able to see him. Well, you tell me. That's Della. Yeah, Della can't see it. Well, I can see the second one. You can see the second one. The first one I can see, too, but he definitely has cover. Yeah, he definitely gets a little bit of cover.

Pembroke, roll a perception check. Okay. 18. That second one that came up into position right before it disappeared out of your sight, it's Isseus. Oh, really? Oh!

You recognize it as Isseus, the wounded one, the one that perhaps killed Razzmatazz is Isisius. It is now the troll's turn. That's thorny. That's a wrinkle. The two-headed troll begins making its way to Sir Willemette Keswick.

Let's see here. Double moves around the corner. Gets even farther away from the peanut gallery. And it's now about 5, 10, 15, 20 feet away from Sir Will. Little does it know that it is in perfect charging range for Sir Willemette Keswick. And it is Umlo's turn. I believe Umlo has to do a little bit of a will save to see if he enters mortal deadlock. Let me ask you, is he within range of them?

Oh, not nearly. It's not sight, yeah, so you're good. Oh, I thought it was sight. I apologize. Umlo has no range weapons to speak of, and his acid dart only works 30 feet away. He has the mythical skillet. Umlo's going to stand. He throws a pan.

15, 20. This isn't Teflon! Umlo's going to stand. Throws a pan. 15 and 20. This isn't Teflon! Umlo's going to double move so he can be prepared to brace himself at the top of the stairs should they come up and acquire Loth. Very brave.

Very brave of Umlo. Hold. It's been a while since we've seen this guy in combat. Ladies and gentlemen, Pembroke the Potent. Yes! Yes! All right. Hold, please.

Black tentacles. Ripping all the pews to shreds. Create pip. Sorry, what is the... Hold on. Hold on one second. It's called Ray of Disintegration. Oh, you know what?

He is going to cast Fireball on the two stone giants around the corner. So wonderful. Yep. Wonderful. His close friend. Yeah. Yeah, I was thinking about this. Well, I'll just cover this later.

about this and well I'll just cover this later but so that is a DC 17 reflex save for half damage. Reflex save for half damage. Alright so the back one

14. Would you say 17? Yeah. Alright it's failed. Isseus. Isseus also fails. Okay. that is 23 points of damage to each. Boom! You hear Isseus cry out in pain, and the other one takes its first licks. Nice!

Fireball! Classic! Is that our first fireball on the show? It might be. On PC? Jell-O has cast it several times. I'm sorry. I keep forgetting about it.

Not fireball. Yeah. Really? Yeah. Really? Let's go to videotape. We can refer back to our recorded episodes. There's just no way of knowing.

All right. Sir Will, 20 feet away or so from a disgusting two-headed troll. Yes. Wielding two scimitars. Whoa! Really? Yep. All right, so Sir Will is going to, seeing the other two stone giants splitting away,

he was originally going to try to draw this guy deeper back toward the altar the way he came, but he's feeling emboldened by his renewed faith in Iomide. but he's feeling emboldened by his renewed faith in Iomedae. He lowers his lance, and he's going to do a ride-by-attack charge past this guy. So he's 20 feet away. He's going to go 50 feet past him. Tilt to the side and end up far on the other side. Let's see if he can get a hit.

For Highbury! For Highbury! Highbury! Highbury. There we go. That's got to get a hit. For Highbury! For Highbury! There we go. That's got to be a hit. 32 to hit. Yeah, that'll hit. And he does 10 points of damage. Ha ha ha. Oh, that's great.

You rolled poorly. And how far past him do you go? Roughly 50 feet. I'll take care of it. My roll 20 is so slow. This guy sped up to try and meet you, and now you've run past him, probably out of his range. Yeah, so I just kind of tilted to the side and ran past him.

We'll see if he can charge his way over to you. Okay, and last is Aram. Aram looks to... Even though he's standing near Nestor, he looks to Baron. Dude, Is everyone okay? We're all fine, Aram. Just hold.

Be brave for Shimmerman's fortune. All right, let me know if anyone needs healing. And it is round two. Nestor. All right, Nestor is going to once again fire. Actually, yeah, he's going to fire at the stone giant that he has the clearer view on. Okay, the non-Issius stone giant.

Yeah, the non-Issius one. We'll call him Roger. Roger the stone giant. It's a family name. Roger Stone. Turn him on. So that's 22. 22 is a hit.

Sweet. And, damn it. 39 points of damage. 39 points of damage. Udious. Boom! And he's going to fire again. 29 to hit.

Yep, that's going to do it. And. 27 points of damage. Whew! How did he hurt me? Fire! Shoot, shoot, shoot. All right, so that one is in really, really rough shape.

Della, can't quite get an aim on these guys. What are you going to do? I can't get an aim, especially with the one that Nestor just hit, so I'm going to take two shots at him. Okay. Or let's see what happens. Let's see. First shot. 16 to hit. That is a miss. Second shot. 15 to hit.

Miss. Man, you are really grinding it out over here. Alright, so just change that guy out as well. Farron, you've seen Della out as well. Baron, you've seen Della fail four shots. What are you going to do? Baron's going to spend an entire round reloading his giant spank crossbow. However, before

he does that, he'd like to do a little bit of a knowledge local to know if Isseus has any loved ones or family we might be leaving in the dust after we murder him to death. So that is a 8. I'm not acknowledging that. That's not how that works.

Pause for edit. Alright, so the second one who is in really, really bad shape, he Oh boy, this is a pickle. He is going to move with all haste to try and get right underneath the balcony,

making it impossible for you guys to hit him ranged. But let's see if he has the speed with which to do it. I think he does. They have a natural speed of 40, so 80 feet. I think he's going to be okay. What does he know about the hot oil canisters we have up here? Good call, Della. It was disguised as a hopsicone!

And he does indeed. He gets all the way down, and he is now out of you guys' range. And Isseus, he's no fool. He does the same thing. he's no fool. He does the same thing. That's a lot of diagonals to be moving 80 feet, just FYI. You can move every other one as a diagonal.

Read the quote. All right, so you get right up against the wall so that they can't shoot straight down at you. Right. Unfortunately, they're right next to each other, but they have moved out of range. Meanwhile, Morog, the two-headed troll. Ooh!

Let's see what... Can we get a named crit on Sir Willibit? Oh, boy! He's got a couple of simitats! And crit! Alright, so he's got 5, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 30, yeah. He's gonna charge at Sir Will. Ah!

I don't know what time it is. And, ooh, that's going to be close. 28 to hit. That's a hit. Okay. Stupid question. Did you get a bonus of damage on a charge? Because I have not charged in so long.

Ten points of damage with the scimitar. And now it's right up in your face. Two heads are better than one. Umla! Umla's holding. He's bracing for impact. Umla is both holding and bracing.

Just for one night. Okay. Okay. It is Pembroke's turn. Wizard in our midst. Alright, Pembroke's turn. Wizard in our midst. All right, Pembroke is... So, is there any reason he couldn't stand at the edge and look over the railing and see them below?

How high is that railing? I mean, if we can fire over it, like, can he look... Sure, sure, sure. Yeah, I suppose you could, yeah. You... Sure, sure, sure. Yeah, I suppose you could. Yeah. You just can't fire ranged weapons. Yeah, yeah. So he is going to lean over and fire a magic missile

at Isseus. At Isseus. Poor Isseus! Who knew Pembroke was so heartless? Oh my god. He's ruthless. That's what that Kanye song's about. 17 points of damage Nice And a bottle cap too

Which is always nice Oh yeah The famous magic missile The old force missile bottle cap See that's the double whammy you get With firing a magic missile So Pembroke just looks over the edge

Just How many of those? Four? Four yeah Just Pepper Isseus Isseus. Isseus who, think about it, he came in the middle of the night thinking that maybe

Minderhall was talking to him. He came here. He wasn't. For a purpose. He came here maybe to find a greater purpose in his life. Heard a voice in his head. Is it Minderhall? No. It's a crippled old man who is now murdering him. He was wrong.

He was very, very wrong. Sir Will, what are you going to do when a two-headed troll comes for you? Sir Will is going to do a strategic withdrawal. So he will withdraw. Full withdraw. Full withdraw. How's that related to cowardly withdrawal? Is that the same?

It's strategic. Okay. Now, with ten feet of reach, it doesn't get an attack of opportunity? It does. It does. It does. Okay. So just boom with the scimitar. You think it's going to be the crit this time?

You think the crit's coming? No, but it's going to be a hit. Another hit with the old sim for nine points of damage. So Sir Will's taking 19 points of damage. But you do get away from this thing. You're playing possum with it, and you're also now, as you initially planned, drawing it back towards your ranged friends.

Aram again looks to Baron. Has anyone heard? He's a little bit far... What the heck is my voice this episode? He's a little bit far away, Aram. Just hold. Just hold. Alright, I can channel. Round three. Nestor coin.

Nestor! All right. Nestor is going to... Jump over the balcony and stab down at Isseus? Exactly. Awesome. I'm going to move 30 feet over right to the edge of the stair, like get onto the top stair, so I can flank the two giants.

And I'm going to fire a single shot at whoever the closest one is. Is that Isis? Yes, that is Isis. Oh, natural one. Oh no! Not a fumble. Not a fumble.

Yeah, it's a miss. Isis will live another round maybe Della we changing up the strategy the fans at home want to know Della is going to jump over flaming scimitar shocking grass there you go

death from above just giving you some ideas. Della is going to follow Nestor, but she is going to ready an action. Okay. So she'll move 30 feet, and then if the giants come near the foot of the staircase, she will cast a spell. But I'm not going to tell you what the spell is. Okay. And for the listeners at home, 30 feet is still quite a ways away for Della

from the actual stairwell. Right, I just moved her. She's 10 feet away from the edge of the stairwell. Excuse me, that's not where I was moving to. Oh, I'm sorry. We'll be moving back. I took the liberty of moving Della to where I would like her. You're drunk on power!

She is now outside of the cathedral and being attacked by a horde of giants. Baron, your crossbow is loaded. Baron is going to have to double move because he cannot see over the railing in order to target them with melee. But he's going to stand behind his buddy, Umlo, with a double move. He'd love to give him a touch. His buddy, the human shield. I thought he was going to stand right behind my best friend Shieldy. I mean Umlo.

Correction, Troy. He's a dwarven shield. That's a good point. And he would love to give him a touch of law for whatever attack he gets, but he can't because he had a double move because he's got tiny little dwarf legs. Tiny little dwarf legs. He's doing the best he can. Stone giants, they're just having some trouble there.

Just when they think they've got a chance to be safe, they get peppered by magic missiles. And let's see here. They both just double move. And you guys can see them. You see, if they can move at that speed, they're probably going to be up on top of you guys next round. And actually just be face-to-face with Umlo's braced spear. And they're moving fast, so they might just run right into that spear. Meanwhile, the two-headed troll, Drew Blood on Sir Will.

Where'd he go? Oh, Sir Will's so far away! Well, I should be 70 feet away from him. I can move 70 feet. So I pull with Drew 70 feet away. Whatever his movement is, he can get that much closer. With a charge, he can move 80 feet, which will be enough for him to strike at thee. Oh, another hit.

Damn. Jeez, man. I haven't rolled lower than a 15, and that one is going to be 12 points of damage. All right, I got to get out of here. This is like, you guys just hear, oh, oh just hear... You can just keep charging. Hyperall! You have to run. Sir Will's taken a 10, a 12,

and now another 12. You're taking some hits there. It is Umlo's turn. Umlo, you know they're coming around the corner unless they know something you don't. Now, could Umlo give the rest of his ranged party members a bit more breathing room, move to the bottom of the stairs, and then ready a brace?

Is that within the move action economy, or would I just have to spend my action? No, you can use your move action. Okay, great. And then ready is your... Perfect. So I'm going to move to the bottom of the steps, because Umlo is feeling fat and sassy today, and he's going to ready a brace. I don't know that saying. All right, fat and sassy today. Okay. And he's going to ready a brace. I don't know that saying.

All right, fat and sassy. You don't know fat and sassy? I've never heard that. I'm feeling fat and sassy. It's been rejected. Tuesday is coming. Did you bring your coat? Fat and sassy.

What are you talking about? I don't get this reference. I've heard fat and sassy, but then Matthew just started. I am a banana. Nope. I have no idea and sassy, but then Matthew just heard it. I am a banana. Nope. I have no idea what you're talking about. You guys are missing out. I guess so.

This isn't even good enough for deleted scenes. There are fans out there I know who know this cartoon. There are dozens of us. Dozens, I tell you. All right, so Pembroke, still standing at the railing, is going to shoot another magic missile at Isseus. Isseus. Poor Isseus.

Choo-choo, choo-choo. Let me get that sound. That is 17 points of damage. Another 17. Yeah. Missiles are landed. Okay. It is Sir Will's turn. Yeah. Missiles are landed. Okay. It is Sir Will's turn. Sir Will, what are you going to do?

Sir Will, seeing this force missile fly by, he is going to, again, he's going to strategically withdraw. And now he's going to put a pew between the guy and him so he can't charge next round. Pew. So he sees he's covering the distance on the flat, so he's going to go around the curve of the pew. Let me ask you this. What would it take for you to just stay there so I can do four attacks next round?

Just asking for a friend. Nothing? Okay. So you gain the safety of the pew, but now you're leaving what we can hit with our ranged weapons. Sure. Yeah. We got two other giants to deal with. Yeah, you guys are plenty busy. Plenty busy.

Sir Will is just doing what Sir Will does. And Will wasn't 100% on board with the plan anyway. So he dies. I'm just going to say, no big loss. Aram's like, I can't go out there to help him. I'll get murdered by the stone giants. Should I just stay here? Hold on.

There is an attack of opportunity on Sir Will. Oh, let me do that first. Aram, no! Aram, no! Aram, no! All right. This one might not be a hit. You tell me 22.

Miss. Miss. All right. A clang off the back of the armor right as he's running away. Okay, so Aram's just like, I'll stay here. And now it is round four. Nestor, you got a good beat on these guys.

Yes, so now he has his feet planted and he's going to take a full attack. Natural one. Motherfucker. Oh, come on! Oh no! That's a 21 to hit. Oh, come on. Oh, no. That's 21 to hit. Oh, no.

Oh, no. It's a fan master. Oh, man. I'm so happy we get to play Nick's new drop here. If I can find it. Oh, I can't find it. Oh, no, there it is. All right.

All right, yeah, that's it. I'm sorry the thing cuts off after four minutes, which is how long that drop is. I think we told him we needed a shorter version. Yeah, I don't know. It's his own fault, really. Get your shit together, Nick. He's drunk on his own power.

Stop giving us free stuff that's broken. Him and his newborn child that he's so concerned with. All right, roll another d20. All right. Wow, I thought for sure with the highest base attack was... Seven. Seven. Okay. I rolled a one and a five.

Matthew from Edmonton. Oh, no. See? This is why Matthew's so upset. You can see it. It's a Canadian. It rolled a one and a five. Matthew from Edmonton. Oh, no. See? This is why Matthew's so upset. You can see it. It's a Canadian. It's a Canadian. Canadian Matthew.

A Canadian Matthew. He's the mirror universe. It's a doppelganger. Like a white tiger. Make one, it's called in the black. Make one ranged attack against the closest ally. Jesus Christ. That would be whoever that red.

It's Baron. That's Baron. No. Oh, no. That would be whoever that red... That's Baron. No! Oh, no! That makes all the sense in the world. Every time we're up here... He's like, whoa! And just fires directly behind.

He's standing behind me. Like, how am I firing two arrows into someone standing behind me? It's the evils of Minderhall! Poisoning your mind. I guess this would be... Even though Baron is closest, it doesn't make any sense,

so we'll say it hits Umlo. I mean, Umlo is at least facing... even though there's no facing in Power Fight. He's still behind me. It makes sense. Well, he's more at an angle that... Yeah, Baron's like, anything that doesn't attack me. No, it doesn't matter. It is absurd.

Just in terms of people being able to picture this, how the fuck is this happening? He is standing behind me. The answer is always banana peel. Alright, banana peel. Banana peel. Again, right in the back of another ally's head. Well, luckily I rolled a natural 20. No!

No! Are you kidding me? But I rolled... Oh, but he's not a studied target, so that's 14. Unless you've been studying. That's 16 on the confirm. This is Umlo? Yeah, that's a miss, right?

On Umlo, that is a miss. So instead, it's just max damage. Oh, that's... No, it's exploding dice. No, it's an unconfirmed 20. Exploding dice. How long did we go back in time to like 40 episodes ago? We haven't played this game in a long time.

How long? Well, it's been a long time since we've had Natty 20s and Chris. Yeah. And fumbles, yeah. A lot. So he's not... It's going to be six less damage total because he's not my studied target. So just don't roll an eight.

So that's 34 points of damage. Oh, no. Uh, so that's 34 points of damage. Oh, no. I wish we were playing by that rule where it would be like a grievous wound if it took out more than half his HP. Because that's more than half his HP. In one shot. Just in the back of like Umla's shoulder blades.

I was bracing! I was bracing! So, that's just it. Ah, sorry, mate! That was an honest accident. I'm very sorry. And turns around and fires at the other guy. Again, that is a 20. And a miss on the second arrow! Oh, God.

Falling apart! Nestor does better from farther away, evidently. It is Della's turn. Della will move over to her left and ready in action. If the giants come within this area at the bottom of the stairs here, she will cast a spell. All right, she is now about 15 feet away from Baron, who is 5 feet in front of the stairs leading down. At the bottom of the stairs is a bloody umlaut. With an arrow sticking out of the middle of his back.

And Della is readying an action. Call Aram. Aram! Aram! Aram! Medic! Medic! It's almost my turn. Actually, it's not. I'm at the end of the round. Baron. Baron, seek this asshole, Nestor.

Shoot his only dwarven friend that's still alive in the back. He could only reason that Nestor had turned on the party and he has to shoot Nestor. That really is the only possible explanation. He aimed up and shot. I turned around, shot down the stairs at this guy.

At the new year, we gotta have 2017 awards for fan criticals that upset Skid the most. That'll be a really great award. You know what? Where's he from? Edmonton? Yeah.

That was a worse shot than anything Craig McTavish ever took in his life. Take that, Oilers. That's an Edmonton bird. It was. By the way, the last player grandfathered in that did not have to wear a helmet in the NHL. Oh, very nice. This is better than dick facts. Yeah.

Okay. did not have to wear a helmet in the NHL. Oh, very nice. This is better than dick facts. Yeah. Okay, so Baron moves into place right behind Umlo, and he looks as he's going down the stairwell and says, I could shoot them. I want to kill these giants. But he wants to give his buddy a little cure light. His buddy ums? His buddy ums. All right, so you walk all the way to the bottom of the stairs,

and what? I heal him for 11 points. Nice! Nice! That's huge. and what? I heal him for 11 points. Nicely. Nice. You can feel the synergy of Torag between us. Nicely. Right before we pray to raise Minderhall from this.

You know what? I'm an Inquisitor. I don't have your weird paladin hang-ups, Sir Will. Raising an evil god from slumber I get to use the enemy's weapons Against themselves Alright

It is the stone giant's turn The one in the back, not Isseus Comes around the corner here That activates Mutt Della's action And that also activates Umlaut's will save There's a lot of activations. Let's start with the closest to the stone giant, Umlo.

So what is the will save, Matthew? You are the best, Umlo, clearly. I believe it's DC 16, but I'm... I believe so as well. Oh, I pass. I do not have to fight him to the death. You do not rage. All right, Della, what do you want to do?

Della casts Grease. Oh, there you go. You little Grease monkey! It's a 10-foot space at the bottom of the stairs. It's perfect. Alright, reflex save. Yep. Let me just pull it up. DC 17.

Uh, DC... 17, right? No, no. It should be 14, right? It's a level 1 spell. Is your intelligence 16? DC 14. It's be 14, right? It's a level one spell. Is your intelligence 16? DC 14. It's got a pretty good chance.

They are not the most... Oh, fail. Oh! Fail! Nice. Rolled an 11. Nice. So you fall prone.

So, boom, falls prone. Isia sees this creature go down, his buddy. And by moving into that square, doesn't he get an attack of opportunity? He sure does. He was bracing, right? Oh yes, he was bracing. Of course

bracing means he would have walked right into him, so roll to attack on the bracing. By the way, I was just looking at this. Umlo has a strength belt plus four and a negative four strength drain right now. If we could ever remove that, he's going to be so much better. We've got to get rid of that. Also his charisma drain.

All of Galarian. All of Earth, if you ask the attendant. Okay, so that is a 16 to hit. That's going to be a miss. And you will move up in the initiative order before Isseus. Now it's Isseus' turn. Isseus...

What the hell does Isseus do here? He's in a real pickle. Isseus begins to climb up the wall. Oh, cool. That's awesome. Natural 20 of the climb. How tall is the wall?

It's 20 feet up. So he has a normal speed of 40. He rolled a 30. He moved a 32 on the climb. So he gets almost all the way up there. He's about halfway. So he's just trying to climb up.

Can he double climb? Yeah, I guess he can double move. Yeah, because I passed the climb. So he's up there. Yeah. So Isius gets right up there next to... Who is that? Pembroke.

Pembroke. Oh, I didn't even realize! Literally right next to Pembroke. Hey, buddy. Wow. Hey, friend. And he just... He looks at Pembroke and realizes

that it was all a lie. It was all a scam. And it is Morag's turn. Now Morag is kind of playing possum over here, Sir Will. Morag is going to go around the benches to try and meet you. Okay, bring it. But he can't charge and attack this round, which is a little round off for taking damage. Yeah, he gets all the way around, making it harder for the ranged people.

Actually, maybe impossible for the ranged people to hit him. And he's still, though, about 15 feet away from Sir Will with the double. Oh! Pembroke's turn. Face to face with Isseus. Okay, Pembroke is going to to face with Isseus okay Pembroke is going to do a full withdrawal okay

see if he has reach he does 10 foot reach does that provoke yeah one time one time so you can roll acrobatics if he's I can on a full withdrawal though can I I think you can maybe you can because I'm double moving so I don't think I have to move half speed to do that.

Yeah. Yeah, that's true. So he just, like a real anger, like he's been betrayed. And now he sees the face of his betrayer again. 28. That's a hit. All right, so he hits Pembroke. For 24 points of damage.

Wow. With a great club. Boom! This is... But Pembroke gets out of there. Pembroke is down. Oh, it's down! No, he's not. I'm just kidding.

I was like, what? Nester will run out of the cathedral. He's very close. He's very close. Don't worry. Nester will shoot him in the back in one minute, and then he'll be dead forever. Sir Will runs out of the cathedral. He's very close. He's very close. Don't worry. Nestor will shoot him in the back in one minute, and then he'll be dead forever. Sir Will. Mind you, Aram is now the next target.

But Isseus is going to go after Pembroke. Isseus is most likely going to continue going after Pembroke. Sir Will, what do you got? All right. Sir Will is trying to... Yeah, you know what? He's going to just go down fighting here. Oh, no.

Wait, he can't. It's too narrow. So he will continue kiting this guy away from the party. So, yeah, he'll just do a big roundabout of these, whatchamacallit? Pews? Pews. All right, so now Sir Will is running towards the entrance to the cathedral, like around

this four rows of pews. Morag is between pew four and three. Sir Will runs all the way up into, basically in front of pew one, which is the one closest to the entrance to the cathedral. Aram, see, he's spent a lot of time with Pembroke now.

He knows that Pembroke is just getting over the attack and all thatke now He knows that Pembroke is just Getting over the attack And all that stuff He sees that Pembroke is in need of help So he moves Moves over Closer to Pembroke And channels positive energy for Pembroke

Two sixes and a two Wow nice 14 points of healing for Pembroke Thank you Will is about 195 feet away Does he get any of that? Sixes and a two. Wow. Nice. 14 points of healing for Pembroke. Thank you. Thank you. Will is about 195 feet away. Does he get any of that? You know what?

I can measure it. No, no, he definitely doesn't get it. He's got to look up channel positive. Just outside. Just missed it. All allies within 200 feet. Round five. Nestor.

All right. Well, Nestor was going to do something really cool and fun that he hasn't ever had a chance to do yet, but now he can't because Pembroke's in this much trouble. So he's going to attack Isseus. Okay. So he comes up to attack him? Yeah. Yeah.

He walks right up behind him and shoots him in the back of the head with an arrow. Right in the back of the dome. Natty 20. No, he doesn't do that. All right. So yes, that is a hit. Right in the back of the dome! Natty 20. No, he doesn't do that. Yes, that is a hit. All right. Could this be the end of Isseus? 41 points of damage.

And Isseus goes down. Hits him in the back and he falls forward. Quite possibly saving Pembroke's life because that would have been a charge with a great club yeah that would have been it uh and Isseus falls down and begins bleeding out it is Baron's turn Baron says it's like shooting fish in a barrel my friend looking at the grease covered giant trying to get himself up again. And he finally fires his second shot from the plus one giant Bane-heavy crossbow.

Past Umlo. So a little bonus to his AC. Crack die. That is a hit, my friend. Okay, there we go. That is a 26. 26, yeah, that'll hit. That'll hit.

That'll play. Okay, so. That'll play bad. Bonus giant damage is five. Yeah, that'll hit. That'll hit. That'll play. Okay, so... That'll play bad. Bonus. Giant damage is five. Base crossbow damage is six. So that's a total of 11 right now, and the added fire damage is three

for 14 points of damage. And that is enough to take that one to negative one. Beautiful shots, gentlemen. All right, so both stone giants have fallen for the moment. And it is, well, it is now Umlo's turn. Umlo pulls an arrow out of his back. He's so brave. And he's going to coup de grace.

Coup de grace? I don't know. Coup de grace. Someone yelled at us the other day, and I don't want to say it ever again. I know. It's an automatic crit, which is going to kill him, so just describe it to me. He's up on, like, a couple stairs up. He's doing, like, a jump.

Umlo rears back a little bit, and he kind of, like, slicks the oil off the bottom of his boot, and he says, I've put plenty of you down in my days, and I'm going to take all of you down before I leave. Ah! The spear heart spit goes through him and then he pulls it out with the barbs and he actually confirmed a crit. Right, right. For the first time ever.

Level up. Immediate level up. Immediate level up. Stone giant blood mixing with the grease. They're both dead. One enemy left. And a dragon. Della.

Here's what Della's going to do. She's going to take off running, run down the stairs, and acrobatics over the side of the banister and start with all haste heading towards Morag. Morag? Morag. Morag. All right.

What's your acrobatics check? It is plus 16. Plus 16. All right. So you can get right to here. Right to basically the corner where the wall meets the end of the staircase. So I imagine her doing a little bit of a

front handspring over the banister. And she lands like a cat at the bottom. And it is Morag's turn. Stella will also taunt Morag. Vicious Della will also taunt Morag. Ah.

Viciously. She'll say, she'll shout because they're 200 and something feet away. Sure, but they have great acoustics in here. Great. Your friends are dead and soon you will be. Fight us. Roll intimidate check.

17. Morag comes up around the corner and begins making his way towards Della wait this is the troll the two headed troll yeah so now he is basically where the stone giants came up to hide behind the wall to avoid those ranged attacks

that's where Morag is Pembroke after his brush with certain death Pembroke is going to just get five feet closer to the edge and try to catch his breath. That's it. Okay. Pembroke just...

Sir Will, you hear it run away from you. Well, I saw it. Oh, yeah. You can actually see it from where you are. He turned the other way from me and went toward Della, so Sir Will will start pursuing. He's too far away to reach, but he'll start pursuing him.

Okay, so Sir Will just kind of, but keeps his distance. He goes as far, but keeps about 20 feet away from him, you think? It would be more than that, even at my max move. I'm not going to run. I'm just going to come up 70 feet. Like Trot. So yeah, I'm still about 40 feet away from him. Aram says to Pembroke,

do you need more healing? No, save it for the others. I'm all right. I'm coming around these barrels. Actually, yes, I could use a little. If you have extra. I do. All right. And he heals

Pembroke for 19 points of healing. Oh, that gets me up to thank you. Wow. So Aram comes around the barrels. There's some barrels up here that were all full of ale. He comes around and heals. I think it was Mead, actually. He heals Pembroke.

I feel like we've been undervaluing Aram. Seriously. Yeah. Where have you been all my life? Where was he in the underwater temple? Well, all the stuff we didn't play out is he was like nursing, helped nurse Pembroke and Lork back to health. Yeah. Where have you been all my life? Yeah. Where was he in the underwater temple? Well, all the stuff we didn't play out is he was like nursing, helped nurse Pembroke and Lork back to health. Right.

And it is round six. Nest a coin. All right. Nestor is going to double knock. Yeah. Nestor's got a shot on Morag here. He's got a shot on Morag. And he's going to take the shot.

That is 28 to hit. Yeah. All right. And. 49 points of damage. Surprise, surprise. Morog, fall. Roll a knowledge local there, Nestor.

All right. 22 on the knowledge local check. Well, that's enough to know that good thing you put Flame Arrow on there because that will kill the regeneration. That was my thinking. And that is a bottle cap. Yeah! For Pembroke.

For Pembroke. Pembroke bottle cap. Oh, for the magic missiles? No, for Flame Arrow. Oh, okay. And honorary magic missile bottle cap. Awesome, cool. All right, you are out of combat.

Oh, boy. We got four dead bodies here. Isseus, the other stone giant, Morag, and the mangled corpse of Rasmus. You really love bringing that up. I just can't help it. What goes on here? Well, Pembroke walks up, kind of

limps over to the dying form of Isis and like kind of leans down and he says rest now my friend may you find answers in the next life

that you are unable to find in this one and he closes his eyes his eyelids and Isis stops breathing and he closes his eyes, his eyelids. Anisius stops breathing. Huge, huge chamber here. Up ahead, Umlo and Beren see Atena walk forward in front of the statue.

Farron not too far behind, and she just looks out over... She doesn't see anything. The entire crowd doesn't see anything. She doesn't see anything. There's so many people that came today. Thank you all. Thank you all for coming. It's my birthday! Happy birthday to me!

A tenner of the church. She looks out over the whole large congregation. Of course, it's empty. And just smiles. She's like breathing in the air, breathing in the cold slag in the pit below. Is this the first time she's even been out of that chamber in like hundreds of years? Yeah. Hundreds of years.

And you guys see the size of the room. Della turns and is like fascinated by this. She's like watching very intently. Right. Centuries. Locked away. Farron not too close behind her. And she kind of calls out towards

Baron and Umla it's like we must act quickly there will be others prepare yourselves set yourselves in the way that you would like and then we will open the doors and blow that horn

next week And then we will open the doors and blow that horn. Oh, Jesus. Next week. I can't believe it's still not happened. The Glass Cannon Podcast is a Powerhouse and Tate production and is an officially licensed partner of Paizo Incorporated. Giant Slayer is copyright 2015. Giant Slayer and the Pathfinder Adventure Path are trademarks of Paizo. All Pathfinder images are property of Paizo and are used with permission.