The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 170 - The Birds and the Bears

Episode Date: August 28, 2018

The heroes must make a daring escape from a burning building before deciding where to turn their attention to next! For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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a sweet phone plan, Netflix, Disney Plus, and Amazon Prime. All starting at just $99 a month. Stack more, spend less. The Happy Stack, only at CUDO. Conditions apply. This week on the Glass Cannon Podcast. The building is catching on fire. As the flames close in.

Do you want to try and search other rooms, search bodies, or get the hell out of here? You don't know what kind of time you have You don't know Are they going to send eight patrols at you? And the entire camp is on the hunt I'm a little less confident about sleeping here now though That the wolf who got away has a really good scent of us The heroes must make a quick escape

The other unexplored rooms are the last thing on my mind at the moment Yeah, what did we hear? For now, they are the hunted Forces are coming in from all directions. And the hunters can track their prey. Trolls descending in. Winter wolves skulking about.

Frost giants. And as you're watching them, the wolves start to fan out. The adventure continues. And he sees a large black shape emerging from the forest cover. No. Hello, my friends. This is Matthew.

For those of you who don't know me, I play games where I roll dice and speak into microphones. Anyway, hope you all enjoyed our live Twitch of the Pathfinder 2.0 playtest last Friday. It was a lot of fun on our end, for sure, and it's only just the beginning. There are six more sessions coming your way throughout the fall, so stay tuned for those. Please join us as we screw up and then learn all the fun new rules and try not to give Troy the chance to yet again murder all of our characters.

It's a good time. Also, Glass Cannon Live in LA is fast approaching. I have it on good authority that we may well sell out, so get your tickets now. Info is available at glasscannonpodcast.com. Anyway, that's really all I have to report on my end. I don't want to delay this. We're literally standing in a burning building. So, yeah.

Yeah, I should go. Please enjoy episode 170. Oh the fire skid i have a question for you please would you agree that we are at the height of our popularity right now yes this is absolutely this is it right we are we have reached peak popularity we'll never improve no we're gonna just steadily be mid mid-carders in the world of podcasts. Oh, wrestling reflers. Start it off. I like it.

No, I think we are at the height of our popularity. The Patreon's going real well. We've got about 19 shows going on. I lost count. And we're going to start doing some video pretty soon. Actually, by the time this releases, we'll have gone live with our first Pathfinder playtest video. Very exciting. Which is why I can't figure out why I picked now to have a child, because my brain is complete oatmeal, and the quality of these shows are just going to go downhill.

I am surprised, because I know how careful a planner you are. I am. So I was kind of a little taken aback by the timing of all this. I mean, I think you had 20 solid years of childbearing ability, 25? Well, I think as a man, I can do it as long as I want.

Well, no, no, I'm saying up until this point. Matthew, look that up. I think I can have children, I think, well into my 90s. You misunderstood what I was saying. I was trying to point out how old you are oh oh I see I'm trying to say of all the many years

compiled before this where you could have done this all these years of reality you chose this moment I was never more virile than I was this year maybe that was because of the popularity that's probably what it was it went to my head just the other head come on that's fun your brain was it went to my head just the other head oh hey come on that's

fun uh your brain really is mush isn't it it's just terrible and uh let's just why don't we do a couple of role-playing apps where i'll let you guys drive the show until i get on a normal sleep schedule and then we'll do some like high level combat i'm sure the fans will love that oh yeah so by a couple of episodes you you mean at least eight, nine? Half a dozen. You know it's going to be months, right, before you sleep? You know that's going to be months. Book five.

By book five, we'll turn all of the combats into role-playing encounters until then. By the way, speaking of having children at a late age, and I know fans increasingly hate it when we talk before we start playing. It's true. They hate to be reminded that we're human beings that enjoy each other's company. But did you know that President John Tyler,

who was born in 1790, has two living grandsons today? I did know that, actually. Really? He had quite a few children. He did. He had several.

He had 15 children. I think he had his last child when he was 79, I think. Wow. And then that child was very, very. Yes, exactly. Yeah. Oh, my God. Isn't that crazy?

That is crazy. This country is very young when you think about it. It is a young country. This podcast is very young. That's true. It's the ripe age of three. Yeah. Right?

Yes. We had a three-year anniversary recently, and we forgot about it. I think it was the next day. We were too busy. I got sent out a tweet about this. We were too busy. In the long tradition of anniversaries, we just forgot. Well, at the time of this recording, my son is three weeks old, and I'm very excited.

I turn 40 in less than a month, so there's a lot going on. I'm going to do my best to continue to produce these shows. But if we miss a couple eps, now you know why. Part of me was going to suggest that we just do all the hard combats now because you'll just have to go easy on us and then I realized no this is Troy even if he doesn't know the rules he's going to find ways to kill us all one of two things is going to happen

you guys are going to steamroll over me or I'm going to be so sleep drunk that I'm going to just take it all out on you guys one of two things I wonder which one it will be. Last week's ep was a nice long one. You know, you

had that triple combat that actually went over two episodes, 168 and 169. You go to the forge, you take out the Frost Giant and the Fire Giant, who had a plan. I think part of their plan was staying alive a little bit longer, but they did get you out on the ice long enough to have these remorasses come up and attack.

Forebears, you literally saved Baron's life. I went over what that damage would have been. He was going to eat him, and it was going to be bad. And how is Baron going to get out of that thing? Well, I sharpened my gun for like 100 episodes. I could just cut right out of his belly. That's the thing. How is he going to get it?

He has a gun. He's the only guy in the world that has a hundred episodes. I could just cut right out of his belly. How is he going to get it? He has a gun! He's the only guy in the world that has a gun. That's right, the gun does piercing and bludgeoning, right? Yeah. So you could get out. Alright. Just shoots his way out. Just like Jonah and the whale. Metal tail. Just shot his way

out of that whale. That's right. It's the first firearm mentioned in the Old Testament testament i don't know what they teach congregationalists but that is not how the tale goes look it up look it up very elusive scripture up at the new england no that was a long and exhausting combat i was mentally drained oh i was the end of that oh yeah Because I'm playing a new 11th level class and archetype and character. And in listening back to a lot of it, I have to say I was a little disappointed in some of my tactics.

I was like, I got to rethink the way I'm playing some of this. Oh, I'm sure. I'm sure I wasn't. I'm sure I wasn't. We're all disappointed. Yeah. But it is. It was when you're casting spells

That drains a lot As a player Drains you mentally Yeah A lot When you're trying to read spells Cast spells Memorize spells

So I I have a new found respect For Matthew's Constant mistakes What did we What did we say constant We've We've rearranged a bit

Around the table Recurrent I guess Would be a better word Recurrent We've rearranged a bit Around the table And Joe is now would be a better word recurrent we've rearranged a bit around the table and Joe is now sitting next to me

yes I'm a little concerned about what's gonna happen I'm excited he's like Hakeem Olajuwon under the rim man he's gonna dream shake you and throw an elbow

right at your face and then he's gonna go back to the line to get away and one all I can say is when you see that natural one hit the dice tray

duck just get out of the way I was talking before we started that maybe we should work out a signal because Skid and Grant are sitting across from us that they should give me a signal when I should leave when Joe's fury starts to go. Grant's got a good idea.

Yeah. And I said you'd feel it like a horse's genitals. The heat from a horse's genitals. I feel that anger. I don't recall you saying that. I don't remember that part. Maybe I said it to myself. I'm veryitals. I feel that anger. Is that what that... I don't recall you saying that. I don't remember that part. Maybe I said it to myself. I'm very tired.

Very tired. No, I think those are good for new characters. It's like a stress test. It's like, let me figure this guy out. Take him out for a good triple combat. Yeah, you gotta learn from some mistakes. But he lived. You know, he survived the combat by a long shot.

So we're all right. It finished with the patrol coming in. Finally, this patrol caught up with you because the fire giant, with his dying action, I think it was the fire giant, called the patrol, and they came. They're dead now, too. And they are dead as well. So you got two dead trolls, one dead wolf. One wolf got away. Two dead giants and two dead frost worms the building is catching on fire

feyraza sees a magical breastplate giant size giant uh no it hadn't yet yet been giant size oh medium they always brought their oh yeah they to and failed. You could see that they were trying to do it, but they didn't have the skills to pay the bills. I could tell that those were spelled with Zs, right? Yes, skills with a Z, of course. And there's also two other rooms. There's a room to the north and a room to the south that you guys haven't gone into, right? Correct. No, no.

No, you are correct. But I'm just sorry. I'm just thinking like the warning siren went off, though. Oh, yeah. That was my last thing. The other unexplored rooms are the last thing on my mind at the moment. Yeah, what did we hear? What was it?

Oh. Okay. Is that the wolf that alighted them? So Warren Zevon is clearly on his way. Listen, I don't know if forebears remember this, but we can literally teleport out of here. Oh, yeah. Yeah, we're fine.

We do have to put this fire out, which we can do with a thought. I can dispel my wall, right? Right. My fire. That was your firewall, or was that forebears? So we can explore the rest of the world. It is forebears. I always thought, by the way, it was werewolves of thunder.

What? I always thought it was there goes the thunder. Okay, so. There goes the thunder. Werewolves of thunder. Just making it sound. That sounded cool. I knew it was called werewolves of London.

I just thought he was howling and the wolves were saying, there goes the thunder. In wolf speak. In wolf speak. In wolf speak. I imagine, Forbears, you're looking at this flaming wall as the building is starting to catch fire, taking in everything that just happened. Your biggest battle since you joined this crew. Longest battle, we'll say. And if you're just staring into those flames for a while, I can see you maybe getting lost in the flames. And then the flames sort of turn into a hot blood red sun, which is

slowly setting over the horizon. You see a quiet thin trail cleared through the wild undergrowth of a forest that rests against the side of a mountain. Dusk is fast approaching. Sun's coming down. The chirping of birds begin to mix with the symphonic vibrations of cicadas and the occasional hoot of an owl. Cresting a rise nearby, we see the head And then slowly the body Of a young showanti come into view It's four bears But he's much younger Maybe a teenager

He wears the hide furs of his people And on his head Is an elaborate headdress That must have some ceremonial significance For it's something no hunter would ever wear on a hunt. You can see some of the feathers are like falling into his eyes and he's swatting back at them in frustration trying to get them up. And as he does, he continues walking towards us and then past us. As he does that, it's then that we see there's a small figure behind him. With the help of a walking stick,

an old woman hikes the trail with him. The two of them continue snaking their way up into the higher reaches of this forested mountain. At one point, the young Shawanti deftly leaps up a small rocky slope in three bounds. Like, boom, boom, boom. The older woman, who's probably like in her 60s, struggles up the incline a little bit. As she reaches the top of the rocks,

the boy grabs her arm in an effort to like help her the last couple of feet, and she stops cold and just swats his hand away, not unkindly. She catches her breath for a moment, then speaks in Shawanti. I can do it myself, Okahati. Little Bird, she calls him.

A playful name that she's called him since birth, but not for much longer. Because her grandson is going on a vision quest, and should he survive the journey, he would emerge with his war name, a child no more. She's saddened to see how much he longs to be a man, to leave his childhood behind, and you can see that in her eyes, because she knows that he doesn't know that one day he would want it all back, the innocence of childhood. But such is the way of youth. She smiles and follows him to an opening up ahead.

As they arrive in this small clearing, you can see it looks out over the lands of their people. They stop and begin a ritual. people. They stop and begin a ritual. She instructs him to start a fire, removes a bowl, water, leaves, and powders from her pack. She then heats the water and begins making some kind of tea. Grandmother, I'm not sure I'm ready. He says in this small voice that belies his preternatural size. He has grown furiously in the last year and now stands taller than most of the men in the tribe, despite still being a child. Why do you say that?

I'm afraid. Afraid of what? The animals. The mountain cats, the bears, The snakes. The... everything. She smiles, to see him so nervous, remembering his father saying the same thing many, many years ago. You have no reason to fear, she says as she crushes the leaves with a pestle and adds powder. The animals do as I say. I would never let them hurt my little bird.

But you won't be here. You have nothing to fear. Trust in what I have said. You must remember that when I leave. Must you leave? Yes. I know they say I have to be alone, but you're the chief. You can do whatever you want.

Can't you stay nearby? I mean, you don't have to help me or anything. Just watch in case anything unexpected happens. Something unexpected always happens in the wild, but you are ready for it. More ready than you know. Now here, drink this. She hands him the tea. He slowly reaches for it, the feather of his headdress again falling in his eye. He waves it away, pulls the small clay bowl to his lips, and drinks. Many have come before you

and sat in this very spot. Many will come after you. Know that if you want to be a man, you must be here alone. You must quiet your mind and listen. The sun, the moon, the animals that walk the earth, the spirits that dwell on the mountain, they all speak to us. But none of us can hear them. We are too busy hearing the noise of the people all the time. You must be alone to truly listen.

As the lights continue to fade, she stands and gathers her things. She grabs her walking stick and moves over to him, knowing this is probably the last time she's going to ever see him as a child. She puts her hand to his smooth face and looks him in the eye with great intensity. You must swear a solemn vow never to repeat what I say next. Yes, of course, Grandmother. You are always my favorite. She winks, kisses him on the forehead.

Remember, she says as she's starting to walk away, four moons. You may not return home before that. First moon came quickly. His fear seems to have subsided, probably from the warmth and strength of this strange tea. Eventually he falls asleep, but is soon awakened by the sound of cracking leaves and sticks nearby. His head shoots up in a panic immediately, and he sees

a large black shape emerging from the forest cover. Young forebear stands there, frozen in panic, as a bear slowly approaches, smelling the ground and patting toward the boy.

He's just standing there, shaking, frozen. The bear walks right up to him, sniffing the area around him, grunting in displeasure. It's hot breath palpable on the boy's neck. And the boy, who would someday be known as Four Bears, closes his eyes, beads of sweat running down his forehead, shaking, trembling with fear.

Well, aren't you a tall one? The boy's eyes slowly open. Oh! Oh! Oh! You're shook back

out of it now, hearing the warhorns of Skirgard staring into your wall of flame. Wow. We'll see you next week. Oh, man. I just searched warhorn on Syrinscape and nothing comes up. I know there's one in there. Oh, wait, there it is. I found it.

Play it. You play it. Oh, yeah. That brings you back, huh? Yeah. It brings you back to episode 100. True now, too. True now is what I think of.

We didn't have this sound at the season. That's true. Cinnamon's Fortune. Yeah. That's true. Shinman's Fortune. Shinman's Fortune. Man, that was crazy. We didn't do too well in that battle. We didn't. Suffered many losses.

Feet, bodies. We must hurry. Bears. We must hurry, says Pembroke. Yes, yes. Four bears Bears. We must hurry, says Pembroke. Yes. Yes. Four bears agrees. Enemies approach.

Faraz will descend in unwild shape out of the air elemental and will head towards the breastplate. Okay. And take it. And just take it. Okay. Building is going down. There's things coming at you. Do you want to try and search out the room,

search bodies, or get the hell out of here? You don't know what kind of time you have. You don't know. Is there, are they going to send eight patrols at you? What's the plan? Search the search,

everything. Search everything. There's a room to the North room to the South. Is everyone in the building or some of you are still out on the ice? I, I'll mention, I'll step into the building. Yeah, Four Bears is out on the ice, so he'll fly into the building, and when Feyraza says we're searching the rooms, he'll take a standard action to dispel the wall of fire that's in there.

Okay. The fire has still spread to the building, but this will buy you some time. Okay. Talk to me. What's happening? Do we want to divide and conquer, or do we want to stay together in case we need to teleport? Well, someone should just keep an eye out,

and then the rest should just kind of split up. Four bears will keep an eye out. All right. So Pembroke is going to go search one of the rooms. Okay. And who wants to search the other one? I'll head out. Baron will head out to the other room. And Faraz will start searching the rooms. Okay. And who wants to search the other one? I'll head out. Baron will head out to the other room. And Faraz will start searching the bodies.

Okay. So Pembroke heads to the north room and it appears to be the room of the fire giant. You just see a bed, an end table, and pictures of things that fire giants like.

Golf. Fire. Volcanoes. Ernie Els. Warm hearts. Fireplace. It's like a motivational post. It's like a volcano spewing love and it just says persistence.

Joel Schumacher directed it. Flames on the walls. Calgary Flames. Calgary Flames. Calgary Flames. Framed jersey. Chris Chelios. Signed by

Chelios. Do Flamie. Thanks for your support. Flamie? His name is Flamie? Flamie the Fire Giant. I love it. It's canon. Put it on the board.

I'm going to phone this one in. Flamie the Fire Giant? I'm going to do perception just on the room. Very nice. 30. 30, yeah. It appears to be a chest under his bed. I yank it out and try to open it.

Yep. It is unlocked. You see inside a giant-sized bronze spyglass. Oh, cool. You know that's probably worth some coin. Yeah. In a small deerskin pouch that feels like it has more coins in it. Okay.

I grab the pouch. I take the giant spyglass. Is there a gift receipt from Brookstone in there? What'd you roll the first episode? You don't see one. I grab, I just like, I'll try to sell it on eBay, and I just grab

the spyglass and I run out. You run out. Meanwhile, Baron goes into the south room and it's got to be the female frost giant's room. Ice everywhere. Jokes about ice. That saved a lot

of time. If you guys, people out there, insert your own jokes that you like about ice. Or experiment with a new form. Choose your own jokes that you like about ice. We're experimenting with a new form on the podcast. Choose your own jokes. We'll tell you the theme,

you tell us the jokes. You don't see anything of interest. Quick perception, eh? We're talking about 32. Nice. 32. Yeah, bed covered in ice. Because she likes it cold. But no, nothing else of interest

in the room. Empty Coors Light cans. Empty Coors Light cans, but all of the mountains are blue. Oh my god, the mountains are blue! Some cases of butt ice. Baron will head back out and meet up with Feyraza. Feyraza. Feyraza's got that fancy old breastplate.

Four bears. You're watching to see what's going on. Roll a perception. Natural. 20! Just start this one. 36 for four bears. Maybe your portions are changing.

Maybe. I imagine, what's your perception trained skill? What's your bonus to perception? Plus 16. Plus 16. Maybe. I imagine, what's your perception trained skill? Like, what's your bonus to perception is what I'm trying to ask you. Plus 16. Plus 16, okay. So I imagine you're out there and you're still reeling from this memory

at the same time and you're just having this kind of crazy sense that forces are coming in from all directions. Oh. Do you know what I mean? Like, you don't see anything. Maybe you feel the ground moving, but you just feel like they're coming. from all directions. Oh. Do you know what I mean? Like, you don't see anything.

Maybe you feel the ground moving, but you just feel like they're coming. He's flying. He can probably feel it in the air. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Something's, like, crackling in the air. Or if there's just, like, a little cup of water on a dashboard, you, like, see ripples, like, forming in it.

There you go. Yeah. You should see Troy's eyes grinding. He's like, where did you come up with that idea? I know. He was so excited by that idea. Yes, a giant played by Wayne Knight running over the hill.

Hello, forebears. Hello, Frost Troll. Yeah, you just, that's what you feel. Meanwhile, Feyraza is searching the bodies. Yeah. All right, you already searched the fire giant, so you know what's going on there. And the frost giant, she's got a giant chain shirt and a greataxe.

Nothing of interest. The Remorazes are loaded with magical things. They have nothing. Do you go under the ice and check? No. Okay. And I'll do a quick perception around the room, because you told me about the breastplate.

Right, right, right. That is a 34. No, I mean, you can see that they're... You actually probably feel pretty confident that all the weapons being forged for the entire camp are happening here. Wow. So just the two of entire camp are happening here. Wow. So just the two of them alone were doing everything.

Wow. You think like, all right, so that makes sense. They brought in the fire giant from where? Is he a higher up or a lower up? Did they just find him? Brought him in to help out. And then meanwhile, I lifted the veil and told you that the female frost giant was like a frost worm whisperer. So she's there, and they were working in tandem.

But you just see countless weapons. You don't detect any magic on them in various states of completion. They are creating an army. This is such a huge blow for them. Oh, yeah, taking out the forge? Yeah. Huge. And the blacksmith. You know, taking

out the person that's making skills. Right. You can see, like, tomorrow, if you're watching the camp, they'll probably be like, alright, can anyone else make weapons? Anyone else have any skills? You don't just get another fire giant. You know, they're not just running around everywhere. Yeah, not up here. No. They're going to have to write to HQ.

Sorry, I interrupted. Graham was going to say something. I just think we should rename them either Smith and Wesson or Heckler and Cock after making all those weapons for them. Did you say Heckler and Cock? Cock. Grant, this is a family show. You started this with all your horse wiener talk, Troy. It's your fault.

First of all, I said genitals. Okay. If you've ever been near a horse, you can feel the heat off their genitals. Just as you can feel the anger off of Joe O'Brien. He rolls a natural one. I'm sorry, I just have no experience feeling the heat off of a horse's genitals. Well, you're missing out. It's very hot.

Cold night, cuddle up. Forebears is going to loudly make it known that they're coming gather round kids gather round the horse's genitals Scorn's coming it's all good the knights of my father warming our hands by the horse's nuts

everybody into the stable it's going to be a cold one no Easter coming in. Oh, my God. I'm so tired. All right, so... Do we get the sense that this building is going to burn down? You get the sense that the building's going to burn down a little bit more slowly now,

now that Four Bears has turned the spell off. But Forbears gets that sense. I'm sure you tell them, Forbears, in your gibberish. He says they are coming. He's not speaking gibberish. He's not gibberish. He's speaking his own language. It's gibberish to Baron and Feyroz.

Do you know why barbarians are called barbarians? What? Oh, because they go bar, bar, bar, bar? That's exactly the reason. Yeah, because the Greeks thought that their language is so bar, bar, bar, bar, bar. Because the Greeks, in their infinite humility, thought that everybody not speaking Greek was speaking gibberish. Exactly.

Bar, bar, bar, bar, bar. So that's all you hear from four of us. Bar, bar, bar, bar, bar. Is there anything we can do to fan the flames while we're gathering together? You could throw the poster from the Fire Giants. Chris Chalice. Light right up. Done.

Jerome McGinley autographed the trading cards. Just throw them out of the game. The Chelios jersey lights right up. Done. I do it all. He's got a bottle of Fireball in there. You could throw that on there. Oh, excellent.

Whiskey, light right up. Four Bears has a Burning Hands left. He could, if there's something cloth or soft or whatever, he could just give on there too quick. I mean, if that's your goal, you can do that, and then you want to get out of here? Yeah. And if so, where?

Teleport back to the camp. The camp overlooking, base camp overlooking the up. Yeah, so. Well, we could actually go back to, I don't think we have the tent, do we? Do we have the tent? Yeah, we would have brought the tent. We do, yeah. have brought the tent.

Oh, go ahead. We could go back to the cathedral or wherever else. No, I would like to stay at the camp if possible. Look at all what they're doing right now. Yeah, just to keep an eye on them. I'm a little less confident about sleeping here now, though, that the wolf who got away has a really good scent of us.

That's what I'm worried. And Troy mentioned to Matthew when he asked as he left last episode if he felt like he could communicate because he was casting spells and whatnot, and Troy seemed to think he'd be able to talk to his master and give him some more info, so I'm just a little worried. Sure, but can he...

We can keep a watch? It's not going to climb a mountain quickly. We're professionals. We're up the side of a high cliff. We would have time. We would see them coming. Keep a watch. It's not going to climb a mountain quickly. We're professionals. Okay. We're up the side of a high cliff. We would have time. We would see them coming. It wasn't casting spells. It was breathing some magical breath.

Okay. There's only one magical wolf in this story. Grant. He can walk up and down stairs. And he's probably dead. He's a rug on someone's floor. Damn it. Actually, he's a rug on stairs.

Perfect. Alright, so you want to show up near that copse of trees. That copse of trees overlooking the statue. Plant the spike. And the brewery. Plant the spike. What once was the brewery. Plant the spike, and then we want to take a look at their movements.

Just for shits and gigs, go ahead and roll a D100. I mean, this is a very familiar place. Joe, not you. I saw you get a D100. No, no, no, please. Put that down. Put it down. 43. What does Joe roll? 86? No, 58. We're all good. This is where

your 86 rule could really come back. This could be real bad. That's one extra number that could destroy us. Alright, so boom, you're there and you're just watching this all unfold. Yeah, we're invisible. We're underneath the spike. You're invisible, you're in the spike.

Plant that spike. Baron, Pembroke, Feyraza, and four bears. Joe just held out four fingers for four bears. In case Troy forgot my name. He's very tired. Veraza and two snakes. I love his rap album. Two snakes is great.

It was good. It's not bottle cap good. It was good, Grant. You watch, and sure enough, it starts really catching fire. But at a certain point, the patrols and other giants have come over to try and stop it. It doesn't matter. The building is a disaster. And without their main smiths.

Or the Remorazes. Or the Remorazes. I mean, you know the blow you've dealt. So you have to just imagine from your vantage point what is going on. Chaos. I imagine chaos. Can I use the spyglass? Can I do a spellcraft check or something?

Yeah, go ahead and roll a spellcraft check. All righty. Oh, that is a 34. Yeah, it doesn't have any magical properties. It's just you know. You've probably seen things like this in the Arcanarium. Did I say that right? Yeah. I always get it wrong. like this in the Arcanarium. Did I say that right? Yeah.

I always get it wrong. I think so. Arcanium? Arcanium? Arcanarium? In the AC? Yes. Atlantic City, brah. That's where I would teleport, 269. In the Tropicana? Especially where it's giant, it is beautiful. Even though it's only made of bronze, it's worth a lot of money,

but it allows you to do what you want to do. So you get a really good look on here. So you see those ice trolls. You see more of those winter wolves skulking about. I kind of mount it on the top of my stool cane. Right. Like a tripod. Like take a knee.

Yeah, yeah. And I just like look. Yeah, like the fire giant was probably using it with two hands. So for you, you really going to like take it. You hang it on Four Bear's shoulder. Yeah, he'll kneel down, put it on his shoulder halfway between. I am actually going to do an appraise check on it also. Yeah, go for it.

24? 24. It's worth 1,500 gold pieces. Ooh. And it's mundane? That's awesome. That's great. Wow.

Can I spellcraft? Ooh, and it's mundane? That's awesome. That's great. Wow. By the way, the deerskin pouch has 15 diamonds inside, which are worth 50 gold pieces each. It has six platinum pieces and 311 gold pieces inside, so a nice little haul. Wow, that's great. Wherever this guy came from, he came from a nice family. Seriously. Hold, Flamie. We should crush down those diamonds and resurrect Lork. No, that's great. Wherever this guy came from, he came from a nice family. Seriously. Hold, Flamie.

We should crush down those diamonds and resurrect Lork. No, let's not do that. Never. Just hold on to him. Just hold on to him. Can I spellcraft the breastplate? You sure can. And then I want to talk about what Pembroke's seeing.

Not great. 15. 15, huh? You're not quite sure. You do see, you get the sense that it has something to do with phasing in and out. Oh.

Baron rolled a 25 on the spellcraft as. Yeah, you're like, Baron steps over. I got this. I'm magical now. Let me do this, all right? Perhaps you've heard of my Bane Baldrick. There's been a lot of discussion on that Bane Baldrick, Troy. A lot of people on the side of right and might,

a.k.a. Grant Danenberger. Oh, really? A lot of people on Grant's side on this? I'm on the side of truth. It is a breastplate of vanishing. What? That sounds awesome. Fight for it. Fight for it. Fight for it. Fight for it. Fight for it. Fight for it. Fight for it. Fight forishing. What? Ooh. That sounds awesome.

Fight for it. Fight. My precious. And he disappears. Never to be seen again. He bites off Feyraz's finger and disappears. Breastplate of Vanishing. Give you a little detail on that.

Talk about worth some money. It is a plus one mithril breastplate. Looks like a stylized turtle shell. On command! The wearer can vanish inside the armor, leaving the breastplate behind while she stays safely hidden in an extra-dimensional space. The space is barely large enough for the wearer to sit comfortably, but does provide air and light to see by. The wearer cannot perceive the environs around the armor while inside. A second command word returns the wearer to the armor's location, wearing the armor.

If the wearer can't return to the space the armor's in, it's shunted to the next nearest space. Or if for any reason the breastplate is destroyed, the wearer returns. So it's just kind of like... Wait, can you see the breastplate? Yeah. If you're somebody else? You vanish inside the armor, but clink, clink, clink, clink, the armor stays behind. Okay. And you are in this extra-dimensional safe space.

That extra-dimensional space sounds like a greyhound bathroom. Like it's stuck in a bus stop. Hopefully it's cleaner. Is there any way to know if there's someone currently in the extra-dimensional space right now? So do you put it on? No.

Somebody's in here! Occupy! Occupado! Hey, can you hand me some toilet paper too? They're out. Can any one of us actually wear it? I can wear it. I need to wear my wild armor. I think this is 100% Bear Bear.

Oh, great. How very Joe of you. So nice of you. Saved my life. Who can wear it? Show of hands for podcasts. So you guys. We used that joke a few times

lately. It's been good. I like when you said juke. We juked a few times lately. We used that juke. So Grant, you're the only one that can wear it? That seems about right. So for bears, you just want it to sell in the black market? Well, do you want me to... No, I said it's for bearin'. Oh, you said

bear bear. Oh, I'm sorry. I called him Bear Bear before. He would have said Bear Bear Bear Bear. Yeah, when you said how Joe of you, I was like, I'm confused by that insult. No, that was like... But I so often am. That's why I thought it was a nickname for yourself. It's like short for four bears.

Right. You're just using two of the bears. I also thought that. Okay, I'm sorry. Actually, everyone did. I called Baron Bear Bear for a long time before four bears came around. No, I can't. I understand thought that. Okay, I'm sorry. Actually, everyone did. I called Baron Bear Bear for a long time before a forebear came around. No, I can't. I understand the confusion.

I love adding things on Hero Lab and forgetting to check buy for free. And it's like, you're 13,000 gold pieces short of being able to afford this. Technically, we could be pronouncing Baron wrong. This isn't interesting. Never mind. No, Matthew. I'll explain. No, you started that really.

You really dropped that off quick. Tell us why Grant's pronouncing his character's name. I want to hear this. The reason is because he's from the South, but we'll go into this. They're actually different sounds, but certain reasons. Throw dry rub at him. It's covered in dry. I still have it on me.

I still have it on me. I never got it off after that barbecue. I haven't showered since I cooked it. All right. I'm like Mr. Fuji. All right. So. I never got it off after that barbecue. I haven't showered since I cooked. I'm like, Mr. Fuji. Alright, so you're looking through the spyglass. Yes. Trolls descending in.

Winter wolves skulking about. Frost giants. You don't see any of the higher ups, although you can tell there's a difference between like regular frost giant and lieutenant maybe or a couple of Sarges walking around, but you don't see any of the bigwigs

that you saw during Skirkala's speech. But everyone looks, they look both pissed and also like, what is happening? Like, not resigned, like, oh, something's not right here. Just kind of like, what are we going to do? So you see the higher-ups, like, conferring with each other. Who are the higher-ups? When I say the higher-ups, I mean the people.

They're Frost Giants. They're Frost Giants. Random Frost Giants. Random Frost Giants. Why do I always forget the name of his, right? The Herseer. Herseer, yeah. The Herseer's not there.

No, you don't see the Herseer. Obviously, you killed the Bellows. So you see the lieutenants, the sergeants, and they're conversing. And Pembroke, even though you feel like you guys have the sort of jump on the camp right now, it's a very uneasy feeling you're getting watching the lieutenants confer with one another. And as you're watching them, the wolves start to fan out and you start to get nervous about Baron's concern.

They're sniffing and they're going around. You see, if you keep looking about the camp, you see those wolf warrens that are between the lower camp and the upper camp, those caves. Remember I said they were large, large caves? Or there was one that was large and the other one were regular size. They're coming in and out of there and just being spread out throughout the camp.

It's not long before they will be closer to where you guys are, but obviously you're on the lookout, so I'll let you know if they come right up in your business. That's what you see. We also don't have a choice in the matter at this point, right? Yeah, I'm out. We can't teleport out of this and we can't climb out of here. That was my concern about teleporting. Sure.

I could fly away. It's okay. It's alright. Feyraza could fly away. I just wanted to be clear on the situation. I think the only thing we have to do now is to smear Baron and shit. Classic. Well, I have my pocket dimension, so fuck all you guys. Throw him near the statue of Thermon Deer. Is it just me? That breastplate

sounds... By the way, I think Four Bears can wear it. It's medium armor, right? Breastplate? So I think he can. It is. It's light armor. No, it's not. Breastplate advantaging is light armor. Because it's Mithril. Oh, that I could wear. You could all wear it it i already have it on

my character sheet so i guess that's it then sorry it also race clothes it's a better max dex bonus than what i'm currently wearing it raises my thing by two let me have it it has a holster for his gun built in yeah it actually says baron across it too it's really weird it just but it just sounds terrifying to me it's like when the awfulness is coming at you you vanish and you go into a greyhound bathroom where you cannot perceive anything that's happening in the area where you just were yeah and then you just have to blindly appear back in the armor wherever it is or whatever's happening think of it this way it could be life-saving i'm just saying it's scary. If you picked up Baron after he vanished

in the pocket dimension, picked up the breastplate and then threw it like Johnny Unitas down the end of the field, in the end zone, behind the big bad evil guy, comes back, that'd be awesome. Oh, you mean if it was like a planned tactical use? Yeah, it'd be a cool use of it. That's pretty cool. See, I didn't think about that. That is a cool idea. Yeah.

Shoot it in a cannon? Yeah. I'll see you in two rounds. Shoot it out of a cannon? Yeah. Glass cannon. Have yourself banished? How about that? We could banish one of us and then toss them in the bag of holding.

Yeah. They don't have to have an air in there. They're just in the existential space. How about Trojan horse it? Walk up to the camp, offer them a bunch of goods, and be like, we'd like to give you this breastplate. Right. We know it's only medium-sized. Have our turned frost giant give it to Skirkotla

as, like, a gift. And then Baron, solo, shows up in her room. Yeah. She tries it on. And then I explode her. And he comes out. Boom, boom, boom. She explodes.

End of book four. End of book four. There it is. Sorry for the spoilers, guys. It just wrote itself. This is good. I need to get through this book. I'm just going to hand wave that.

I think that's good. That's good. No, it's a very cool item. What do you guys want to do? How long can you go into that pocket dimension? As long as you want. Is it rounds? It doesn't.

So there's no time limit. Cool. Yeah, you can breathe there normally. It'd be weird if you came out and your friends were dead. That's what I'm saying is like all your friends are dead and you're in the enemy's like storage shed. It'd be fun if Grant ever uses it if I make him leave the room. That'd be good. And then he doesn't know.

I think we should. Yeah. That's awesome. Or put him up there with headphones on that he can like noise canceling headphones. Noise canceling headphones. Hi, Grant. You can come back. And then we'll all make faces like something awful happened.

No, no, no. You should do it like And then we'll all make faces like something awful happened. No! No! No! No! No! No! You should do a blind taste test on Gordon Ramsay's Hell's Kitchen and put a blindfold on me and no noise-blocking headphones, but let me have my microphone. You'll be like, candy ginger.

Mm-hmm. We could just spend $40,000 on a Scott Pruitt soundproof booth. We have some options. We could see him through the glass. He's just looking out at us. Our next Patreon goal. Alright, what do you want to do? Pembroke sees these wolves coming. Is it a

done deal that they're going to find you? No, but they're going to make their way to your side of the camp at some point. And if Baron's correct about their scent... There's no trail, mind you. There is no trail. So he's going to have to luck into our scent. And you're not exactly on a main thoroughfare of where they all walk about. And don't discount the amount of wind at the top of a mountain.

That fouls up scent a great deal. Are you upwind or downwind? Exactly. Where's my die? I say we just move back a little bit. Get as far away as we can from the edge and throw in the spike tent. Because even if they do come up there searching, they won't see us. Yeah, they we can from the edge and throw in the spike tent. Because even if they do come up there searching, they won't see us. We're in the spike tent.

So we could have them jump on them regardless. But what is it? As soon as they get within a certain amount or anything interferes with the illusion, it's over? Yeah, as soon as they touch the illusion. Remember the bears on the top of Minderhall's Cathedral? Yes, yes, yes. Oh, yeah. I smelled you. I smelled you!

And then we can rest? Yeah yeah do some healing and some resting did you want to rest Matthew we'll keep a watch just a little bit yeah it makes me wonder what Kat Benatar is doing right now yeah but she opened up a nice little B&B her own thing yeah her own thing

alright let's get a little rest in here. Okay. Let's do watches. Let's coordinate watches. Let's do it that way. Coordinate watches. You know, it's so funny.

I wanted to look this up before we started playing. Pathfinder Playtest has a really cool system for watches. Yes. It's based on the number of people in the party. It tells you how long you have to actually rest so that everyone can get eight hours of rest and everyone can watch. It's based on the number of people in the party. It tells you how long you have to actually rest so that everyone can get eight hours of rest and everyone can watch. I was thinking about this just now

because of the Kingmaker. Yeah, I was just thinking the same thing. Because you spent forever trying to figure it out. Yeah, I spent forever trying to figure out the mechanics. On Twitch? Yeah, even when you just now said this, I was thinking, okay, well, Four Bears is happy to watch, but if he watches, he can't get any of his spells back.

Even if he just watches for two hours, he can't get any of his spells back. So we have to rest longer than eight hours. Let's figure out, is it going to be 16 hours? Are we going to rest into the next day? So we need to take eight-hour shifts, or not shifts, but eight hours of sleep before ever doing a watch. And that game had me thinking that. So that's definitely something they're thinking over there. They're working on the resting.

Yeah, and it's weird. I think a party of four, it's an extra two hours and 40 minutes in Pathfinder Playtest. You have to rest. So like 10 hours and 40 minutes, and everyone gets all their stuff back. If they have a watch. If they have a watch. A rotating watch, yeah. But you guys are going no watch, right?

No, we're definitely watching. Four Bears is happy to offer to watch first. He's in pretty good shape. He still has some spells left. So he's eager to get Feyraza to sleep first and keep an eye out. Four Bears got first watch. He has a pretty good perception, too. Feyraza takes a melatonin.

Baron, you want second watch? I'll take second watch. Feyraza, you should be well-rested by then. You want third watch? As long as I get my eight hours I'll do whatever you want And Pembroke is, he likes to have his breakfast at 5am So he'll be up I'm an old man, I wake up at 4.30

I'm not going to eat a steak at 3.30 Stand behind a tree Trying to pee for 15 minutes Come on Alright let me just make a couple of rolls Behind the screen here Does anyone need any healing before we talk about stress? I'm fine Come on. All right, let me just make a couple of rolls behind the screen here. Nothing that you really need to be too interested about. I'm fine.

Yeah, I could use something. That's interesting. I was eaten by a ram. Look at that. Don't worry about what I'm doing. You guys just talk. Oh, okay. I'm down 40.

It's so awful. I'm down 48. Well, I can take care of you, so don't worry about it. All right, I'm going to wand myself. I do not like the look on your face right now, Troy. That little coy smile up to the corner. He likes it too much. You just don't like my face.

That's true. I was about to say, I never like the look on his face. I never like looking at his face. This is why he's so mean to us. We don't make a lot of eye contact on this show. We never do. It's weird when we're not recording because I have to look at you. And I'm not used to it. The rest of us make eye contact.

You just don't make eye contact. Do I not? Is it me? Yes. Yeah, you're always wearing a hat. Your eyes are always covered by your hat. You're always looking down at your book. I spend a lot of time with my cat, a baby now.

And my wife, who was out of work, caring for said baby. And so I don't have a lot of time with humans. Yes. I don't know how to interact with you. You know your wife and your baby are humans. No. That doesn't sound right. They're different.

They're different. They're both angels. Angels. Angels here on Earth. Well, as far as you know, Grant, you're all right. As far as you know. Now, I got gotta ask you this it's a new day

a new day is dawning you're fully rested you know those of you on watch saw those wolves coming close they're snipping around they're getting close

they're going up near the statue maybe they catch your scent still on those orange peels man those are some incredible wolves

your stank is all over the camp. Yeah, we have literally bled everywhere all over this camp. There's traces of us everywhere. I think they might have cloned us in the temple already and mixed our body with another dead character. Who would

know? It is funny you bring this up, though. Why is it funny? It's funny because I've been preparing my spells. Oh. And I've prepared preparing my spells. Oh. And I prepared four uses of the spell negate aroma. Oh. I wish we had that in the studio.

Old dry rub burger over here. Yeah, I know. Thank you, son of a bitch. I do finish them St. Louis style. I should say, Angel made a beautiful sauce that we glazed over and we let it set in for five minutes, still low and slow at 225. Were they pretty good?

They were really good. They were pretty good. The ribs are great. None of the rest of you were invited. I was going to say. Because I hate all of you. We have a full kitchen here, Grant. You could make those any time.

I'd love to do a charcoal-burning smoker in the middle of the room and just die of asphyxiation so quickly and ruin all of the equipment. Sounds nice. Well, we got dead sons on Sunday. Maybe you can whip that up, buddy. What a great idea. All right, negate aroma.

Spells have been prepared. Everyone is rested. Is everybody at full HP? Yeah. Full HP. All right, so what's next? Let's look at the old greetings from Skirgard map here. You've done a number on the camp.

Now, there are a few buildings that you haven't touched. I'll walk through them with you. Not only buildings, but just locations. And I'm only going to mention things that you have pointed out yourselves. There's this one small building near the lower camp, whereas the upper camp had the mess hall. There's another building near the lower camp. Between the lower camp had the mess hall, there's another building near the lower camp. Between the lower camp and the middle camp

are those wolf caves, one of which large enough to fit a large creature. I think larger than large. I think we're talking huge. I don't feel like looking it up, but it's big. There is this building right in the middle of camp north of the mines and mind you the mines you just kind of you know what's going on there you haven't really done anything there but like what is there to do um question about the mines yes they disappear

into darkness and we just never went in there no we did raza raza went down i know but it doesn't so i thought they just... There was nothing there. I thought they had started digging tunnels, and they didn't get far in, and they were poorly constructed. End of story. Right. There's something there to explore

that we have not explored? No, what I will say is this. During your time of watching, you've seen them do more digging. But since your disruption at the camp, they've turned their attention to other things. Okay. What are they looking for?

I don't know. The one thing you know is that Feyraza told Baron about the construction, and Baron was like, that's shoddy. You know, what are you going to do? That mine is filled with Boston mobsters. It's the dig. It's the big dig. It's going to take years to complete.

Yeah, 20 years to make the Ted Williams tunnel. The building right to the north of that well actually directly north is the forge but just west of the forge is this other strange building that you know nothing about wow then there is

this big long house to the north like right up against it's house to the north. Like right up against it's just to the east of the temple that you guys went to. And then there's, you know, the boss fight. The boss fight.

The door leading into the fucking mountain itself. So, you know, there are a handful of things that you have noticed that are still not dealt with. And there's watchtowers everywhere. But that's pretty much the situation. During the time that they were on alert, did we notice anything in the watchtowers? Did we notice anybody checking the flares?

Right, right, right. the flares. Right, right, right. Yeah, like during, we'll say during forebear's sort of sensing of things, like as you were teleporting out of there,

maybe some fireworks went off just to alert, to send even more people. Imagine if this has been going on now for a little over a week at this point. Like if you guys see anything,

you light those skyrockets. Right. So as you guys are teleporting out and showing up, and they're like, But it's safe to say, I mean, we dismantled a lot of them. Sure. So it's safe to say that the ones that we've dismantled have been discovered to be faulty and replaced, probably.

By now, you would have to assume that's the case. At least the ones close to where you've set off the alarms. I think you set off an alarm when you fought the stallion creatures, or it might have been the brewery fight. So anyways, around that area of the camp, maybe the sleigh pens, basically the northeast. They noticed it was a dud. And then obviously here at the forge, you've caused a bit of a ruckus.

And the silos. We've caused a lot of ruckus. There were woolly mammoths running around. Mass hysteria. Lest we forget. So what does the guards or patrols look like during the day this day? Right. The day patrols.

Does everything look pretty routine, or are they ramping up the guards? Is it business as usual? Maybe a few more guards? I'm going to tell you. I'm just throwing it out there. Okay. That big, old, fancy longhouse, that's what I'm looking at right now. I just feel like it's up against the wall.

It's in the back. It looks like there's some level of leadership in there. I'm tired of dealing with the low-level people around here, Grant. I want to take out this herseer or somebody seriously important. It is like the fanciest. And it looks like a fancy house. It looks stylish. Grant just gave me this slow, dramatic drawing his finger across his throat.

Oh, no, that's supposed to be me flashing your throat, which will happen right after this episode. We'll see you next week. See you next week. You hear me in the background. He's killing him. Oh, my God, you guys. He really slit his throat.

As the audio fades out. The Black Cat Podcast is a Black Cat I've never produced. slit his throat. As the audio fades out. The Glass Cannon Podcast is the Glass Cannon ever produced. I mean, I'm definitely like, I'm really intrigued by Two Things,

by The Longhouse. I definitely want to check that out. And I'm still just really curious about The Mind because I just feel like they're, you know,

they're looking for something and we still don't know what it is. But I don't want to like... We've already kind of checked it out. But we did get the sense that we could blow up that mine pretty easily, if I remember correctly. So it might be something easy to do quickly.

I don't know. Whatever you guys want to do. But I do want to go... I want to check out the log house. Pop up there. Is there any excessive guard posting around the fancy longhouse? Good question. That would be repellent in our mind to not go there? Someone can use the spyglass and do a perception check.

One of you. I can do it. All right. I hand it over to... Who's got the highest perception? I've got a plus 22. Ooh, that's you. I'm 18. to... Who's got the highest perception? I've got a plus 22. Ooh, that's you. I'm 18.

So put Feyraz on the glass. Eagle eyes! She's gonna look through the sky. That is a 35. Oh, baby. By now, you've probably noticed that the day patrol consists of frost giants, whereas the night patrol Consists of these Ice trolls and winter wolves

Why? Most likely While the patrols have been ramped up here During the day, it's daytime right now You see more frost giants milling about You don't see any guards Posted near the longhouse You do see people

Coming and going Sometimes large groups come in guards posted near the longhouse, you do see people coming and going. Sometimes large groups come in and then come up. Large groups, eh? Groups of what? Mixed? Groups of like maybe half a dozen. What's your roll for perception? 35.

Officers. Ooh. Officers mess? Yeah. Or some kind of headquarters, maybe. I wonder if it's like you go in there and there's just the table with all the flags of the small folk armies that could be around and the cities and where they're planning on placing people.

Yeah. This longhouse. Westeros. Yes, exactly. Dragonstone. Is there more than one story or is it a single story dwelling? Because I'm thinking about jumping on the roof, going through the top window, and going, Surprise, motherfuckers!

Come in. There's 40 giants inside. Yep. All with guns. Yes, seriously. Oh, no. That's the twist I've been waiting for. Yeah, yeah.

We took out the blacksmith, but we didn't take out the gun factory. Gunsmith. Guys, I may have been doing some illegal arm stealing. Nicolas Cage style, Lord of War on the side. This building is about 300 feet long. And it stands probably 50 feet high at its apex. You can't tell if there's two floors or if it's just one big vaulted ceiling.

But you don't see any windows whatsoever. No, like little vents for air to get in from the top or a chimney? There's a chimney. Okay, let's send Farazza right down. Perfect. There's plumes of smoke coming out of the chimney. What about some insect spies? Oh, my favorite voice ever.

Oh, no. Ah, There were three forty giant leptokin, sir. It was communicated to me in not so subtle terms that I should never prepare that spell. Don't see that in Pathfinder. There is a level when I can cast six level spells. There are insect spies greater. Oh, no. This works exactly as insect spies, except the voice is less annoying.

That's what the script says. In the book? Okay, so the only way in is through doors on either side or all around? You see through the spyglass three sets of doors leading into the building in the front. There's one in the middle, two on the sides. That's it. No windows. Little smoky chim.

This is chimboni. Can I propose a plan? Terrifying. Let's hear Matthew's plan. Yeah. It's a big old longhouse. Is it 300 feet? At least.

That's a football field, baby. If a yard. So, yeah, a football field baby If a yard So if it's A football field building A football field size Building What if I What if we rain down A volcanic storm

On one side of it And then enter Through the other side Yes Or enter Through that side I mean We can hang out

And watch and see what happens Yeah I like it And then go to the mines While they're distracted Let me Let me throw this at you. Yes.

Can you do that? Of course. That, on a camp that is already on high alert, is going to be like, what is going on in the longhouse? And then 50 giants descend upon a longhouse that could already be very well filled. That would draw a lot of attention. That was your roll of wisdom check.

Okay, whatever you rolled, that was what I was going to tell you. It's very far away. That would draw a lot of attention. Yeah. That was your roll of wisdom check. Okay, whatever you rolled, that was what I was going to tell you. It's very far away. All right, fine. Why don't we teleport by one of the side doors and just try to sneak in and see what we...

Yeah, all right. What are those little things? They look like windows on the top. I zoomed in on the... I did the Blade Runner Enhance thing on the picture you sent us. Enhance. It does look like there are little windows.

Little windows. Wait, did I send you, where are you guys? Oh, look at that. It's little windows. That's a, that drawing's incorrect. Oh. Oh. Well.

That drawing's not right at all. We take back all the praise we made of this drawing. It even says in the flavor text. No windows. No windows. Windowless building. Really? to Mr. Ock. It even says in the flavor text. No windows. Windowless building. False windows. False windows.

Oh, we could also... It's at the base of a cliff, right? Just another thought. We could try to start like a rock slide or an avalanche. We haven't used any of that. We've escaped an avalanche. We've escaped the death of that, but for a building that's right by the side. I mean, the intel inside might be very valuable.

Just another way to approach attacking it, potentially. If it's buried under 500 feet of snow or whatever comes down, then no one can get inside and enjoy it. No one likes this plane. I like it. Well, I just don't know. I don't really understand it. It's like right underneath a cliff, and there's a ton of snow. So I thought maybe we could create a...

Is the goal not to go into the building? Is that what the goal is? Well, we're here to like mesh shit up. Looks like there's like about six inches of snow on the ledge above it. You're saying that because you're from Colorado and you guys always underestimate snow. Grant, no one likes your idea. I'm fine with that. No, I like grant's idea to give it a light dusting of snow before we go in it'll make it extra pretty it would certainly be more picturesque

for the battle what an idiot all right uh all right so pembroke's idea was to teleport in front of one of the side doors, either the east or the west. Are we doing this in broad daylight, or are we waiting for the night? I would wait until after dark, and then wait for a break in the patrols or whatever. Say, like, right after. Just see if we could time the comings and goings, maybe, of people coming out. Maybe, like, right after a group leaves, you know, pop in.

Make sure there's no one on the way. It's extra rough rough now because like we thought we were safe for at night but now that they have a scent you know that but the giants will definitely be more active during the day it would take longer for them to wake up but that spell lasts oh right we have cover so perfect yeah so okay what does the cancel order or whatever it is. Negate aroma? Negate aroma. Ten hours, yeah. And one casting is good for each of... You can...

From the way I'm reading it, you can... One instance of that spell, you can cast it on one creature per level and then for each creature it lasts ten hours. Yeah. So actually I didn't need to prepare four of them. Yeah.

Too late. What a shame. Alright, so you wait until night and then you want to teleport to the east door or the west door? I'm assuming you're waiting for the most opportune moment to avoid the patrols. Does anyone come in or out of either

one of the side doors? Yeah, people come in and out of all of them. Is there anyone that's less frequented? All right, so looking at the Greetings from Skiergard map, imagine there's just, equidistant from each other, a door right in the middle on the front, right on the left, and right on the right. The left and the middle doors are the ones that seem frequented.

The door to the right slash east are the ones that seem frequented. The door to the right slash east seems to be the least frequented. There's stairs leading up to all of them. I say we go for that door. Take the path less trodden. Sounds good. The door less frequented, as the poet

would say. That's my plan. Let's do it. You're the man with the teleport. That's true. We're going where you say. Everyone hold hands in a circle. Life bubble, by the way, when we woke up as per standard.

Life bubble, per standoni. That's really getting extensive now. You do notice that as it gets darker and giants and other creatures are coming up to the door, they're knocking. Knock, knocking? Knocking and then being let in. Didn't happen during the day.

On the east door? On all the doors. Oh, interesting. Is it a secret knock? Do we notice a cadence to it? You're very far away. It's a wooden... It's a bronze spyglass, not a silver spyglass.

I don't think that would change anything. You see them knocking, and then they are allowed in. You guys want to teleport to the door at the most opportune time when no patrols are nearby? Is that the plan? Oh, man. And does anyone want to wear greater Thremir's beard and go in by themselves? I can enlarge you.

Ooh. Tempting. How long does that last, though? The enlarge? Yeah. It doesn't last that long. Ten minutes. Ten minutes.

Oh, baby! We're newlyweds. It was the last time. Ten minutes. Ten minutes. Oh, baby. We're newlyweds. Four bears will do it. Four bears will do it. And you can take one of us in as a prisoner. It is. Or as an animal companion. Did we ever see any slaves being taken in there?

No. Yeah. So, no deal on that. It's only a plus two bonus on disguise checks to impersonate a frost giant anyway. So, Oh, that's all it is. Yeah.

Oh, that's more of the type of, you might want to wear it in general for some of the CMB CMB type stuff. If you're going to be in melee, but, uh, yeah. Hard pass.

All right. Plus two to disguise. No, thanks. That would be like plus ten. If you're enlarged and wearing this thing, they think you're a frost giant. Four Bears is not a master of disguise. But I mean, he speaks giant.

He's a big guy. He carries intense weaponry. Let's see if we can get him to open the door then. Well, nobody would recognize him, though. Well, he could knock on the door. Knock three times on the door. You could sit on Baron's shoulders and speak giant from that point, so they'd think it's giant.

Right, throw a big cloak over you. Well, I'll wear the damn beard, then. I'm already wearing two beards. That's too many beards for one person, Joe. What's your disguise? I don't need a disguise. It's just gonna, you know, do all the other stuff it does. Oh, okay. Yeah. Um, let's just go.

Just go and knock on the door, see if they open it. I like how our battle plan for this extremely dangerous situation has been formulated by fatigue. Yeah. Let's just go in. Let's just go in. Let's see what happens. Well, I mean, I don't, I, there's nothing I can do. I thought insect spies would be a great idea.

We don't want to do it for flavor reasons. So I don't really... I think we just got to knock. I'm okay knocking. Let's do it. We can try the door and if it doesn't open we can knock. Roll a d1. Let's get it.

I'm very familiar with this. Let's get it. Okay. I'm very familiar with this. I'm not. It's the second one down. It's studied carefully. Oh, yeah. I totally agree. 79.

Baby, get vicious. Oh, man. So you are in front of the door to the west. And we smell like nothing at all. You smell like nothing. Smells like nothing at all. Nothing at all. Nothing at all.

Stupid sexy planters. You see this wooden longhouse. Like I said, 300 feet long if it's a yard. As large as any human palace. Actually, could we go to one of the other doors just for a second? What? Why? What are you talking about?

It's 300 feet long. Because I accidentally prepared. I can just walk. I'll just go over there. Because I accidentally prepared another spell called fire trap. Oh. It's a little. You cast a spell and you trap a door with a little firefly. Flame Burst thing.

Again, it's more attention drawn on the canvas. It's not as dramatic as the volcanic spires you wanted to lay waste to this long house with, but still. You'd be setting a trap that if they were to run out the side or someone was to come in, they'd get burned by it? Yep. But people are coming frequently enough. I don't know.

Your call. If the group doesn't like it, I don't have to do it. I accidentally prepared this spell. No, I like it. But, yeah, I don't know how much attention you want to make. But, I mean, if people are running out of the door, they're going to be calling the reinforcements. How much damage does the trap do, Matthew?

That's what I want. 2d4. Yeah, exactly. This is going to be a trivial what I want. 2d4. Yeah, exactly. This is going to be a trivial amount of damage. 10d4 plus 1. So it would scratch a giant. Perfect. That's a frost giant.

I get a reflex save for half, but I don't know. All right. Big old building. Like I said, as large as any human palace. Just standing very quietly, ominously, in this snowy clearing. It was built here at the head of the camp, purposefully. It's for specials. No windows.

Three double doors along its southern face. And just as it was in the morning, a plume of smoke rising from a stone chimney at the eastern end of the building. What do you do? Four Bears is gonna look at Baron and just sort of start to... He's got a shield in one hand.

He's got... And he reaches with his open hand to the... Is it... Oh, we have to knock, right? I mean, can I try the door? Sure. Can I see if it's locked gently? I think you have to roll a stealth check.

I believe, per the rules of the game that we're playing, you have to roll a stealth check. Well, maybe there's a look at Baron and, like, give him the old head nod, like, check the door, see if it's... Bar, bar, bar, bar. Listen, fella, I am the one who knocks. And then he rolls a 26. 20.

Nice, dude. Six Sony. It seems to be barred from the inside. Barred from the inside. Every time with these guys. Bar, barred from the inside. Bar, bar. Bar, bar, bar, bar, bar, bar.

Baran. Bar, bar, bar, bar, bar, bar. Baron will... So we weren't close enough to hear the knock. bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar bar They might get away with it. If I knock down here real low, they're never going to buy it. I call four bears over and ask him to repeat phonetically what he heard in common. Oh, exactly. And then I translate it. You understand some, don't you? Totally. Yeah, I mean, you reach out.

Yeah, he does understand some. You reach out. It's probably a lot of signage, yeah. He's going to. All right. Shield in one hand, open hand in the other. He reaches up high. I mean, for him, that's going to be seven and a half or so feet in the air, eight hand in the other he reaches up high i mean for him that's going to be

seven and a half or so feet in the air eight feet in the air oh no more than that probably eight and a half and just try to mimic whatever we saw in the in the um uh spyglass spyglass in terms of timing so whether it was just like bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang. Right, secret knock. Or just one, yeah. We'll try to mimic it, but just big knock. Hammers the door. Okay. Boom, boom, boom. It's a pause.

A pregnant pause. Oh, no. Something to the effect of, Who's there? When you translate giant, you also translate tone. That's right. Well, yeah, it helps. Who is it? Giant is a very inflective language, so yeah.

Clearly. He'll just grunt and guttural a giant. Officers. Officers. Does anyone try to aid or anything or say anything with him? Or are they just letting him go solo? Or do you have something you want to tell me to say? You could say Fijimon's name, perhaps, or one of the other giants we've met.

Fijimon wasn't an officer, could we say? Or a gentleman. Something like on orders of the Herseher or something? Well. Oh, we knew the name of the brewer. But we know he's dead. Yeah, he's dead as hell. He's really dead.

It's the brewer. He's been stinking for days. I'm back. They saved me. a brewer. He's been stinking for days. I'm back. They saved me. It's just a question if someone wants to aid or if they want to just let you fly solo. Aid how?

If they aid how? With a diplomacy check? Or bluff? Which one? I can roll to aid on bluff. Does anybody speak giant? I do. Yeah, so I guess... I speak giant. I guess it would have to be Pembroke if he has anything he wants to say or he doesn't have to. Salma. We've...

We've encountered a problem on patrol. We need to speak to Hearsayer. All right. You roll to aid, Skid. Joe, you roll to bluff. So it's an aid to bluff. Yes, you get plus two. 18, bluff.

Hmm. Curious. Hmm. curious the door starts to open yes we'll see you next week that's okay

that's okay so excited we opened that door who is it there's a mouse under my table. The Glass Cannon Podcast is a Glass Cannon Network production and is an officially licensed partner of Paizo Incorporated. Giant Slayer is copyright 2015. Giant Slayer and the Pathfinder Adventure Path are trademarks of Paizo.

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