The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 174 - Acts of the Colossals

Episode Date: September 25, 2018

As the Hersir flees and the camp is yet again on high alert, the heroes must make a campaign-altering decision whether to press on and pursue or fall back and prepare for a critical strike! For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on the Glass Cannon Podcast. As their quarry disappears into the night. I want to chase this guy down and kill him. Hell yeah. I'm feeling psyched. Leaving the longhouse unguarded. Let us kill the lost and set fire to this building. And retreat to our hiding place.

The heroes make a decision. I like it. I think it's bold. Okay. That will instantly. Oh, my God. We're all dead. TPK.

Bring the beginning. Look at the map. We're dead. That is horrible. Oh, my God. Of. Oh, no. No.

I did it again. Come on. I did it again. The end. There's more of us small folk than there are of you, and we're gonna burn everything you ever held dear to the ground! The adventure continues now. What is up everyone? It's your boy Grant Berger, aka Baron Ashpeak. Does anybody out there have a gun I could borrow?

I'm gonna tell you, this episode gets pretty, pretty, pretty juicy. But I won't spoil that for y'all. I want to pump, pump, pump it up for our live show coming Sunday, October 7th at the Bootleg Theater in beautiful Los Angeles, California. I think we have a few more tickets left, so check it out and grab yours before they are gone, baby, gone. You're gonna want to be there because you monsters are responsible for picking each and every one of our character classes, so be there to see how they handle the absolute horror that the strange eons adventure path brings. That is not dead,

which can eternal lie unless it's a human fighter. And speaking of not dead, please tune in this Thursday night to see the thrilling conclusion to part three of the Pathfinder play test live on our Twitch channel. But since some of y'all like to plan ahead, I'm going to give you a little bit of insider info. A little birdie told me earlier today. That little birdie told me that you're

going to want to clear out that calendar and cook up some popcorn because we have a very special guest joining us for part four of our Pathfinder playtest and I cannot wait to play with this mystery person. What happens there could

decide the fate of the universe. But ladies and gentlemen, without further ado, please enjoy episode 174. Gentlemen seated at this table, I need to know, have we ever, and be honest, well not be honest, see if you can remember, have we ever had a combat that lasted three episodes? No. Come on. There must be one. Nope.

I've had a combat that's lasted 174 episodes. Some of the table that shall remain nameless. Real smooth, Troy. Oh, boy. One day I'm going to murder him. There wasn't one episode that went three? I thought there was. Or one in combat?

There was one that spanned over three episodes, but I can't remember. There had to have been. No. Lockmore, Eddogan? No, that was two. No. I mean, maybe the... No.

No. Yeah, not counting the Siege of Trunau, which was one long combat over like six episodes, but I'm not counting that. What about the battle for Red Lake Fort? We got challenged. Oh, Matthew. At the end of the one episode when he was like,

Ah, fuck! And Mark did the stupidest thing we've ever done on the show. And then we had the battle and then the resolution. That was awesome. That was awesome, Matthew. Shut up.

69, 70, 71, or 68, 60. 71, we were chilling. Yeah, 68, 69, 70. Maybe, maybe. Well, here we are, and I'm saying three. This could be longer, depending on what you guys want to do. I am pumped. I'm nervous. I'm nervous because I emailed you guys yesterday or the day before,

and I said, can I just get a general idea of what your plan is? And you all had different plans. I think I read them all and said, sounds good. That was Matthew's response at the end. I was like, first thing I'm going to do is chase down this hearse here. And then it was just like, boom, email from Grant. He was like, first thing we'm going to do is chase down this hearse here. And then it was just like, boom, email from Grant. He was like, first thing we're doing is getting my gun. Matthew was like, sounds good.

And then we showed up here. Skid was like, we're going back to scale. But yeah, so I don't know what you're going to do. And it's very hard to prepare when you don't really know what you're going to do. And there's still one more frost giant that you're not worried about, but he exists. He exists. Is this like global warming? Is this frost giant global warming?

He's a double move away from Feyraza, at least right now. So this is a concern. But I have some other concerns. What are your concerns, Troy? As you know, I do read the Reddit from time to time, the subreddit, as they say. We're not doing an all-new episode, Troy, no matter how much they ask. Fair enough. Let me cross that off my list of things to talk about.

They were, very early on, they were like, they cheated on this, they cheated on this. They're taking advantage of Troy's newborn brain, his newborn adult brain, and they're cheating and they're getting away with murder. So I said, well, let me know what kind of cheats they're doing so i can hold them accountable so we found out a couple things oh boy one grant you uh you used umlo like you used della i did i thought i corrected that but i had feeble mind cast on you son of a bitch well i stand by one thing Troy, that you're a piece of shit. Well, that's true. Wait, I thought

that you were... It was a move action, right? I thought that you were... But he shot twice. I shot twice at the beginning, but I think I stopped doing this. I think I corrected it. I think you corrected it. Can't take a full attack action. I corrected it halfway through the episode. I'm pretty sure... No, you shot twice. Not all the time. No, not all the time, because you said, like,

in a round that you were reloading, you didn't shoot twice. But then you shot twice. Not all the time. No, not all the time because you said in a round that you were reloading, you didn't shoot twice. Right. But then you shot twice in a round when you had started the round with it loaded. So you would shoot loaded in the previous round. And you'd be like, now I can do two shots. And I was like, that makes perfect sense. Because I didn't move in between.

Right. But it is a move action. Yeah. It is a move action to load the gun. Right. But you can never do that. You can't take a full attack and a move action. Yeah. It has a move action to load the gun. Right, but you can never do that. You can't take a full attack and a move action. Yeah, which I didn't realize until literally just this moment.

Oh, right, right, right. So you are fired. All right. You are off the show. It's been a really good run. No one's ever going to outlive me throughout all the shows, so I got that under my belt. That's why Ari was here the whole time.

Right. See you, Grant. Grooming him. Matthew, when you cast Stoneskin, can I just see your character sheet real quick to make sure you have the 250 gold pieces of granite and diamond dust? I do not. To cast that spell? I do not.

I mean, I have the 250 gold pieces. Yeah, the diamond dust and the granite. Did you not invest in askew materials? Does askew materials count for that? No. No? Damn. Nobody in our games invests in that because we just don't ever do material components.

You eschew that feat. We only use it, we only really pay attention to it for stuff like reincarnation or that stuff. It's like, oh, you need a thousand gold pieces, powdered diamond to do it. It's like that seems like a major thing. Ordinarily, we ourselves assume. We did it for restoration in the past in our other games. There's a cleric spell where everyone has to have a certain

ring on. That was a cool one. You want the 250 gold? No, no, no. I just want you to know. I'll Venmo you. Don't ever cast that spell again. What else do we got here?

Now, this is very, very interesting. And I asked about it because we got an email about this earlier in the week. Though, now, let's assume that maybe you get Della back. I think that's a big assumption. You may not. You killed her. Della the gun. Della the gun.

The gun Della. You killed her. Della the gun. Della the gun. The gun Della. Did you know that if Pembroke can cast Make Hole on it, he does not have the caster level to give you the Bane ability back? You need to have double the caster level, and Bane is eighth level,

so you need to be able to cast at a 16th level caster level to put the Bane ability back. So it will no longer have Bane on the weapon. Well, you know, that's a huge problem, but we have an anvil that can put magical material and properties onto weapons, so maybe we could do it that way. Hey, listen, I don't know how that works. All I'm telling you is that gun, no Bane!

So wait, is it impossible to put the Bane back onto it? With make whole. Yeah. With make whole, it's impossible. put the Bane back onto it? With Makehole. Yeah. With Makehole, it's impossible. Now, someone pointed out there is Greater Makehole, which I don't think Skid would have it. It's from the technology guide, which came out after Iron Gods.

No, it's not third party, so I would allow it, but I can't imagine Skid just threw Greater Makehole on there. So you could go get a scroll, learn it, blah, blah, blah. It's not impossible, but that's the only way it can restore the bane ability now can you go to the anvil and add it and i don't know how creating magic weapons works maybe but right now with that one frost giant left and a broken gun no bane you get no bane you know who could bring it back this young pembroke oh yes he was mighty indeed he was powerful yeah he was potent he was potent he

was a jerk to foot soldiers he was those guys yeah real jerk to mercenaries yeah really to everybody everybody and that he's always yes he's never kind to the help yes so particularly sensitive towards their needs and the other thing is like i can sunder sunder something like that replaces an attack action, so I could just Keep, if I have three attacks, I can Sunder, Sunder, Sunder It doesn't work like a combat Maneuver grapple does, so if I grapple, that takes up my

Action, but something like Sunder, I could have kept Sundering, Sundering, Sundering instead of missing Can you do that with trip? Can you trip, trip, trip? I don't know, somebody wrote the things You can do, I can't find it right now Sunder trip and disarm can be used in place of attacks It makes sense

Disarm I miss Disarm again It doesn't take that much time We always think that's a combat maneuver That's it but you can do it A couple people mentioned that Thanks for keeping us honest guys Matthew don't ever cast a scone skin again and

you might as well just leave broken della in the hall because she's useless no she's done she's done not unlike the actual character of della she's useless in this adventure oh my god we're having a good time he is starting off on fire we are in medias res here we are in the middle of the action. The high concept? Media res. Media res? I think you're both wrong, but it's okay.

Either way, four bears just went. Now, the last thing you saw, you came into here. You were looking all around. What's going on? Finally, I think it was four bears. You found a little secret door that was ajar. What's going on out there? You detected magic

coming back in the direction of the dais but you guys had already moved into this room or most of you had and you know there's a frost giant back in that room with that magic there's also other rooms in the longhouse you haven't taken a look at but the last moment for bears the tracker former trapper uh sees footprints going in the direction of where scar scar cutler gave her speech and you hear a single signal horn blowing and you think that must be the her seer alerting the entire camp oh no now it is pembroke's turn but feel free to talk amongst yourselves as players and friends. That is the weirdest signal horn. Speaking Latin!

There is currently an emergency in many arrests. It's so condescending. I've never heard a condescending signal horn. So I think my plan, what I was thinking of is i really i told you guys on email i think i put on a bird sound somehow i'm sorry yeah there's no birds here we're above the bird line i'm the only bird here there's one bird one giant bird one giant bird here you have owl sounds like a

really bass heavy owl sound uh there's so i was saying that I really, if we can, I would love to hunt the hersiard down and kill him now because otherwise, having run a few APs myself, I think we run the risk of encountering him later at the side of a bigger boss. So I would love, if we can, to kill him now. I suspect that Troy may make that impossible or largely impossible,

but I think we should try. I agree. I agree. I mean, I think that this is what we would naturally do. But we are several rounds behind. So, I mean, he's got probably a good 30 to 40 second head start on the run, which is, that's going to be tough to catch up with if you're not an owl.

A giant owl. Woo! I'm going to take to the skies. Yes! I'm also a flying wizard. And I don't believe I am flying. The broom, though. Maybe one of us could hop on that broom.

It sounds like a jab for the one who can't fly. Mm-hmm. You know what I do know? Like a jab for the one who can't fly. Mm-hmm. You know what I do know? My strength is 20 and my constitution is 22. I want to chase this guy down and kill him.

Hell yeah. I'm feeling psyched. Let's do it. All right. Whose turn is it? It's my turn. It is Pembroke's turn again. There is a frost giant left in this longhouse if you're interested. Oh, yeah.

Is there a frost giant left? Baron,house If you're interested Oh yeah Okay Is there a frost giant left? Baron could you one shot him real quick And then we'll move on with the adventure For Christ's sake You want that XP? Nope Nope You're gonna withhold the XP for the whole encounter

Just because you didn't kill the one frost giant Yes It says you must complete the encounter I'll give you a fraction of XP On how many hit points you took him down Oh man No I won't give you any fraction of XP on how many hit points you took him down. Oh, man. No, I won't give you any. Now we've told the truth.

It's like when you get to the boss in a video game. I didn't beat him, but I tried. Can I still move on to the next level? Sure. Yeah, because this guy's the boss. You don't know his backstory. Is it backstory that makes a boss? Maybe he wanted to be a herseer, but he had to serve him instead.

And now he thinks he left, and if you guys just walk away, he's going to sit on the throne. It's like, yeah, yeah, this feels nice. What's his name? Roger. But it's spelled R-O-J-E-R. Oh, okay. Roger? No, it's pronounced Roger.

Oh, okay. Pembroke, what are you thinking? So I can't remember precisely where we left off last time, but I'm going to make a perception check to see if I can tell where he went and try to follow in that direction. Okay, so you can step outside. You're right. Step outside like behind four bears there.

Yeah. And roll a perception check That is a 27 Now you don't have dark vision But assuming four bears is like You look Four bears is emanating light

So if you could see some tracks Sure yeah you see the tracks heading off in that direction To where the Door in the mountain is. And that huge effigy that's burning that they were throwing bodies into, that's a light as well. So you see the light from there. And with a 26, you see the shadow of a man running in that direction. Okay.

From the light of the effigy. I am going to – I'm flying. I am going to chase him down. Chase him down. Yeah. Okay. Strike him down. How far away is he?

He is, I will tell you right now from the Skier Guard... Greetings from Skier Guard map. It's a good 500 feet away. Oh, that is too far. So, uh, I am going, yeah, I can't make up that distance before he gets probably to where he's trying to get

to the door. So, um, I'm going to shout down, invisible as I am, he's beyond our reach! Let us kill the lost and set fire to this building and retreat to our Hiding place

Is he really beyond your reach? With dimension steps? Well, actually yeah That's a good point I thought you only had like 200 some feet But then make up some ground Yeah Let me

The thing is I think he'll just outpace him Regardless because I think his double move is or he's running so it's four times his movement it certainly also isolates him quite a bit yeah and I can't run I can move 120 feet around with the fly with the flight

double moving so he'll outpace us unless you had like whole person or something yeah or charm monster what's the range well what i was gonna try to do i was gonna try to like close within range use my spark staff to fire off a couple more um lightning bolts at him those have some good range on them too yeah i might be able to do it um i mean if i can get within spells distance i

can try to arrest his progress in a fashion that i shall not reveal but i have to get within a spells distance so i can okay all right i can i can dimensional step 300 feet and then move another 60

so I would be within 120 feet and then I could try to cast well next round okay yeah I would have to I have to get 60 feet close but then all right and the range of the lightning bolt 120 feet so probably not yeah by the time his next round starts he will have moved out of i mean the other option is to teleport there then then we're stuck then it's like black hawk down we have to run out of camp yeah yeah exactly and that we have to leave on foot. Right.

I mean, some of us, you can fly. That's true, I can fly. Pember can fly, and we've got the broom. And Baron has to leave on foot. This would be brutal. Gunless. It's really hard to run. Gunless. It's really hard to run with a gun. So I gotta drop it. Into his book of poetry. I'm just saying, how bad do we

want to stop? I can also make Baron fly For the record He also got the Oh I can too Because I have the wand I have a wand of Oh that'd be awesome

Right So And I have it prepared I can cast it on him Right now Pembroke All you've done is Move five feet So you've got

Got some objects Oh he already moved Five feet He had to get out Behind four bears Oh But that wasn't The complete move action

No no He still got the rest Oh right right The perception was free In the middle of it Yeah the perception Was free in the middle Do you want to

Do you want to teleport Do you want to try this I think it would be fun Oh my god we're all dead TPK Well you're invisible If you just teleport Oh wait you're gonna

Teleport us Teleport the group Yeah Oh Holy shit It's the same thing either way if he expends the spell we're all kind of stranded okay I like it I think it's bold okay so Pembroke I don't

think Troy's happy with this tournament I don't I don't have a poker face so Pembroke lands and says like gather together my friends and he and he like uh touches touches you like kind of pushes you together so it's like we're going to take a little bit of a journey and so you're ready to teleport when they get all within your reach. Yeah, yeah. Holy shit! Oh my god! Pembroke says, gather together, and it is

now... Get ready for a little ride. Feyraz's turn. So I'm gonna move next to Pembroke. This is insanity. And then I guess I will ready an action as well. Okay. After we teleport and we have the herse here in view, I will cast a spell.

Okay. Alright, so you're gonna move My move action is to Walk up next to Penbrook Okay So he can grab me Okay you can control your character There on roll 20 right Oh yeah

I'm looking at my character's shit Sorry sorry And you're large From righteous might Yeah This is insane This is ludicrous And

You're going to ready an action To cast a spell After we teleport If he's in range and you can see him Exactly This is ludicrous. And you're going to ready an action. To cast a spell after we tell the first. If he's in range and you can see him. Exactly. Oh, man. And you have dark vision? Yes. Okay.

Oh, my God, man. I'm like shaking right now. I know. Okay. It is the frost giant's turn. And I did the math. I can only get within range of Bartholomew the Bearded Devil. Yes.

But we were bringing him, right? Of course. Obviously. He takes a single move and swings at Bartholomew with Power Attack on. Oh, Natty19, almost a crit! Miss. Does this make you happy, Troy? You got to use your frost giant?

At least if I can get rid of Bartholomew. 29 points of damage. Okay. He is still up. Bartholomew is still up. All right. And it is a new round. And it is Baron's turn.

Baron, you are one step away from Pembroke. Baron's going to move right up. And you are 50 steps away from your gun. Right up to... I am Samson. When I lose my hair, I lose my power, baby. But we're stepping into the fray, my friends. Steps up to Pembroke and Cass waves his hand over his eyes and says,

Torek, grant me the strength to see that which I cannot. Cass, see invisibility on himself in case there's shenanigans on the other side. And you see Pembroke immediately. It works. Okay, so you step up to Pembroke. Pembroke, you cast teleport.

As soon as they're all in range. And I bring Bartholomew up towards me too. Well wait, I get to go again before it's his turn. Oh, no, he was ready. He was ready. Yeah, you're right, you're right. All right, so walk me through this. You can move 500 feet, no problem.

Yes. Okay, so he was... We traveled to True Now. You know, the other funny thing is, even if you're like, are you familiar with the area? It's like, this is basically where Pembroke teleported before. So he's been exactly there.

Right. It would have to be a hundred on a D-100 for you to end up someplace else, which never happens. It's almost impossible. Don't never happen. If you roll a hundred, then something bad will happen. Oh my God. He can see the spot he's going to.

He can see the spot. Yeah. It's as familiar as possible. A hundred or an 86. I cannot believe this is happening. 55. Oh! You know what?

Troy Garber may not be able to drive 55, but I can. Old 55. So Pembroke looks into the distance. Obviously, Forbear is giving off some light, but it's the light from this effigy that is casting the large shadow of the her sier on the mountain itself. And you see him running away, blowing the horn the entire time. You say you teleport within, how close do you want to be to him?

In front of him. We should go in front of him. I want to get right in front of him. Interpose. Yeah. You teleport right? Well, I mean, you want, like how right in front of him. Interpose. Yeah. You teleport right? Well, I mean, you want, like, how right in front of him? Like 15 feet.

Oh, okay. So in attack range. Yeah. 15. Do like 30. Do like 30 feet. 30 feet. I said 30 feet.

30 feet from the herseer. Yes. All right. Oh, God. Oh, God. Now, when you went through the options of what you were going to do, I had to start thinking, like, what am I going to do if they decide to chase him? They're not going to chase him.

Baron's not going to leave his gun. And what of the frost giant? So I thought about this. Oh, God. And I said, you know what I'm going to do? I think I know what I'm going to do here. And I'm going to start by rolling a D4. And that D4, each number represents One of you guys

We'll go in alphabetical order We'll say the one is Baron Two would be Feroza Three Four bears and four Pembroke I rolled a three

Four bears Now listen it's not a good thing And four, Pembroke. I rolled a three. Four bears. Four bears. Now, listen, maybe it's a good thing. That's a good thing. That's so confusing. Maybe it's a new car. Maybe he's going to give you a dollar. Maybe it's a plus four set of magical armor.

You get a new car! Four bears teleports directly into a magical set of armor. Directly into Showcase Showdown. $2,800. What's your bid? $1. Forebears, I need you to roll a perception check. The heart is pounding.

I didn't see the number and it's out of the thing. Sure it is. 25. 25 perception. Okay. I can see your die and I'm not looking at it on purpose. Good. I'm so nervous.

Good. Well, I'll tell you. You are very, very perceptive for bears. Let me bring you... Let me just bring you guys over to the map real quick, because what happens is you launch yourselves over there and get within about 30 feet of the herseer. The herseer is right next to this effigy.

As you, boom, arrive there, forebears, you notice that the effigy reaches out to grab at you. What? That is complete lunacy. Look at the map. We're dead. That is horrible. Oh, my God.

That's so horrible. I can absolutely say without question, I didn't see that coming. I can absolutely say without question, I didn't see that coming. It is a colossal burning wicker man. It makes the her seer look like rat folk. It does. Oh, my God. That thing's really big.

That's no good. It's not great. No. I feel like Edward Woodward. Oh, my God. It is Forbear's turn. Well, does my ready action get activated? Your ready action does get activated. You will move in the initiative order.

Yes. All right. And the spell I cast is Ice Spears on the Herseer. Ice Spears on the Frost Giant. Hell yeah. Is the Herseer. Ice Spears on the Frost Giant. Hell yeah. Is the Herseer a Frost Giant? He is. Okay.

Yes. Okay. Walk me through this again. It's a reflex save. It is a reflex save. DC 17. DC 17, natural 20. Oh, God.

Okay. Damn it. So he doesn't get tripped, but he does take damage from each spear. Okay. So. Oh, dear. First spear. 17 points of damage.

Okay. And, sorry, and 10 of that was cold. 10 of that was cold? Yeah, just in case that matters. And, Matthew, you have the smallest stalagmite-shaped crystal, right? Just want to make sure on that one. Just kidding. Yep.

We never do that. What a jerk. And then another 16 points of damage, and 11 of that is cold. 11 of that is cold. Very, very interesting. You just healed him. Natural 20. I don't like metagaming too much,

but you might look at this map and see an impossible fight. It is. It is also a shit ton of experience points. If you could ever survive it. The odds of that happening, well, let's find out. Four bears, you're up.

You just see this arm reaching out to grab at you. Oh, my God. I've been so excited about this creature since I read book four. Look at it. Oh, my God. Look at it. I don't understand it. I thought it was like...

I thought it was like a... I ripped a body and threw it into the fire here Yeah but I thought that it was like a Like a scaffold basically Of a fire effigy I thought it was like rooted to the ground The St. Texas A&M baby You gotta fight this thing

Yes it is Grant Hook em horns Oh man Oh shout out to Susan Kipok Nick Lowe's sister-in-law She's an Aggie Yes, it is. Hook them horns. Oh, man. Oh, shout out to Susan Kipok. Nick Lowe's sister-in-law is a big, she's an Aggie. Big Aggie. Listen to the show.

She was very excited. Fan of the pod. Friend of the show. Friend of the show. Okay. Oh, God. All right. Then Four Bears is going to turn. He sees this arm coming around, and he's going to alert his comrades as soon as he can.

He points. He says, in common, he says, it reaches deep. I mean, he's so tall, and his voice has dropped octaves, and he's like, it reaches. Just to alert you to it. And just to alert you to it. And he is going to then move, try to put some distance between himself and the effigy. And then he is going to enact his spirit of the warrior. There you go. And call on the spirit of an ancient warrior ancestor to guide him in these final moments of his life.

Ooh, doggie. All right. It's its turn. Let me just check out the distance here. All right, that is, who are the two closest? Bartholomew and Baron. Think I'll go after Baron He's curious though, we said we'd be in front of him

It looks like we're behind him, go ahead Troy, kill me Uh, I can put you on the other side Still within range of his grip There's no facing in Pathfinder We are, we should be In front of the direction he was going We are currently, these characters are currently Within range, is what you're saying

Yes, now I can put you He has 30 feet within range, is what you're saying? Yes. Now, I can put you... We are very conveniently placed. He has 30 feet of range, of reach. Yes. That's badass. I've never fought a colossal creature before. No. Yeah.

No, I can easily move you guys to the other side of the map. I was going to set it up this way either way, so... Baron, it was nice knowing you. He is going to reach out to grapple Baron. Mind you, I picked you up in the positions you were in when Pembroke cast and dropped you here. It just so happened that Bartholomew and Baron were the closest.

Pembroke, why do you keep saying Bartholomew? I don't know why. That is going to be a 51 against your CMD. Yes, Troy. Are you kidding? No. No, I'm definitely not kidding. Okay. Rivals! Rivals! Oh boy. Are you kidding? No. No, I'm definitely not kidding. I rules. I rules.

Oh, boy. Oh, golly. Oh, gee. Didn't think it would come to this, but here we are. Yet here we are. We could have been lazily exploring the caves. Lazily. Well, the listeners wanted this.

That's true. They did. That's true. It's time for the sheriff to go to prison. Because what happens is this creature, this colossal creature, reaches out, successfully grapples Baron. And then as a move action, it shoves Baron inside of a cage within its chest. Oh, my God! Now you're Edward Woodward.

Oh, my God. First thing that happens is you take 11 points of fire damage. Okay. And then you automatically catch on fire as you start burning alive inside of the wicker cage within this colossal creature. You take another four points of fire damage. Oh, my God. Immediately. Oh, my God.

Oh, no way. Does that bleed? It ticks on his turn. It ticks on his turn. It ticks on his turn. But when you catch on fire, as he does right now, you get that four points immediately. Okay. Catching on fire.

And then every turn, you get a chance to put that fire out. You are locked in a cage and you are completely on fire. I'm locked in a cage. Immolating. And you have basically been swallowed whole. Oh my god. Except with flames. Except

with flames. Wow. Can you cut yourself out of this one with a dagger? We'll see. I don't think so. We'll see. It is going to be the Frost Giant's turn back at the longhouse. You don't know what he does. Maybe he walks over and says, what is this broken instrument on the ground? Perhaps I'll bring this back to my masters.

No, I think he's live tweeting about this. It's like, OMG, you will not believe what just happened. New round. Pembroke. Pembroke. I'm going to throw up. Invisible is going to fly over to the her seer and make a touch attack.

Fly over to the her seer and make a touch attack. And because you are invisible, he doesn't get his attack of opportunity. The cojones on this wizard. Amazing. That's 15. 15 touch attack. Fly over to the wizard and do a 15

touch attack. If you say miss, I'm going to punch you in the face. You're too far away. You're too far away from me. I cast longarm on myself. That is a hit away from me. I cast Longarm on myself. That is a hit. Okay.

And I'm scared. I cast Fleshworm Infestation. Oh, I've read this one. On to her sheer. Wait, so now we just sit around away from him to die, right? Well, now this is a Fortitude save, so he's probably going to save. But regardless, it lasts ten rounds. Who has a bottle cap? Oh, my gosh. What's on the board? Let's check out the board so he's probably going to save. But regardless, it lasts ten rounds. Who has a bottle cap? Oh, my gosh.

What's on the board? Let's check out the board, everyone. Let's go to the board. Let's go to the board. But every round, you have to make your save. All right, well, what happens? So, okay. Here, let me just...

Why don't I just read you the description of the spell? It's got something to do. It is time for Skitch. All right. Save by finger the work of doing the drop. With a touch, you cause an infestation

of ravenous worms to manifest in the target's flesh. The target must make a fortitude save every round. Failure means it takes 1d6

hit points of damage and two points of dexterity damage and is staggered for one round. If it makes the save, it takes no hit point or dexterity damage and is staggered for one round. If it makes the save, it takes no hit point or dexterity damage and is only sickened for one round rather than staggered.

And it has to do this every round for ten rounds. It has to do this. Oh, this is awesome! And it's a DC 21... 23! It is a DC 23 Fortitude save. Wow. Okay. For the next ten rounds. Alright. I think I can make it, but let's see.

Natty 19. Dammit. Made it. You're sickened. I'm sickened. Yeah. I'm sickened by this whole thing. You might as well just leave that on for the next 10 rounds.

Oh, yeah. But you know what? 10 tries increases our odds of a Natty 1. Right. We just need a Natty 1. One round, and he's staggered. And there's other numbers. I'll tell you right now.

There's other numbers. It's not a gimme. Oh, okay. It's certainly not a gimme. He has a very high chance, but Sickened lowers his Fortitude save as well. Right. Right.

By two. Sweet! Skibbity-bup-bup-bup. Skibbity-beep-boop. I just want to, like, weaken a bullet. And I said, Sebastian,

rescue the dwarf! And Sebastian goes after the construct. Who's Sebastian? You mean Bartholomew? I mean Bartholomew the bearded devil yes. Okay. And so Bartholomew he closes

with his glaive towards the construct. Alright the construct will go ahead and take an attack of opportunity to try and slam the Bartholomew. Natty 18. Okay. He's wrote a lot of high numbers.

That's another miss. That is another definite miss. AC 44. Hits Bartholomew for 22 points of damage. Okay. That's 17. Okay. 22 points of damage plus Bartholomew begins burning.

Okay. Wow. Well, he's immune to fire. I believe. He's immune to fire. He's immune to fire. Okay, so he doesn't. He doesn't.

I'm immune to fire too, Troy. Oh, okay. I forgot to say that. Take all those hit points. I can hang on here all day. It's like a sauna. Uh, all day. It's like Asana. Alright.

Now the Herseer, it's his turn. Now, obviously Pembroke is invisible, greater invisible. He did not become visible all of a sudden because he attacked, but the Herseer can feel that he was just touched. So it's a 50% missed chance to strike out

with his mighty glaive? And I still have mirror image on, too. Right, now someone brought this up. When you're invisible, I didn't read through the whole thing, when you're invisible the mirror images still work for you? Yeah. Did you read that thing that somebody wrote? I was like, oh, that's interesting.

I probably should read this. I don't read anything. And I didn't. I think there's also a fair chance he wouldn't know which square Pembroke is in. Well, all the mirror images occupy the same space. I'm not even talking about the mirror image. You're assuming that he's going to choose the right square, but Pembroke... That's where the 50% mischance comes in, but I'm... No, that's just because you're striking

out a square. That's if you're targeting the right square. I think you should roll something to make sure you choose the right square. You don't think he felt where that hand was coming from? The direction of the hand? No. I think he would know it was from one of these three squares in that direction. That's fair. That's fair.

He might not even feel it. If he's wearing furs or something like that, he might not even... If he succeeded on a touch attack, he probably touched his body. Well, this is what I'm going to do. I've got a D3 here. Fair enough. I've got a D3, and he's got three attacks. So every time i attack i'll

roll a 50 chance and the d3 uh if i roll a three he doesn't he attacks into the wrong square okay so first things first a two so he attacks at a 50 chance for first attack uh 96 and it is a 25 to hit. That's a hit. So he hits, possibly hits Pembroke, might hit a mirror image. How many of you are there? I have, there are four images of me. High level play. This is exhausting. All right, so. What is this, Math Finder?

The best way to do this, a D10. Yeah, D10, one to two, so like you could say nine to ten it do this. A D10 and odds. Yeah, D10 1 to 2. You could say 9 to 10 it hits me. Okay, that's fair. 9 to 10 it hits you. One hit from this guy. 5. So it destroys a mirror image.

And then there were 3. Alright, so second attack. Roll my D3. I would say you don't have to roll the D3 because you would know you hit something. Okay. At this point, right? Made it anyways. And now it goes to attack again. Misses on the invisibility.

37. Beautiful. Beautiful. And using Matthew's generous rule, I will just attack again a third time. And that is 004. That is a four. That is a four. Yeah.

Hey, good round. You can't hit what you can't shoot. Are you curious about the damage? Had it hit you? Sure. 43 points of damage. Wow. On the first hit, for example.

Oh, my God. Easily somewhere in the 40s each. Hit! So the second contributes to that detracts from his ability to hit me as well, right? I believe so. I don't remember what his attacks were. Yeah, sickened is like a minus two, I think. Yeah, minus two.

He's just got a massive to hit. This is a big guy in the camp. That's the reason you followed him. But a high-level wizard, he is almost achieving god status. Luckily, none of those broke through. But you are down one mirror image. It is now Baron's turn. Baron understands that his life is on the line,

but he also understands that part of this is breaking the will of this camp, and he's not going to let this get to him. He's going to grind his teeth, and he's going to say it as loud as voice possible. You sons of bitches can sunder my gun, sear my flesh, and grind my bones

to make your bread, but you'll never break my soul, you bastard. There's more of us small folk than there are of you and we're going to burn everything you ever held dear to the ground! Including Barrett. Including me! Including me! Do you have anything to say about it? Including Baron Including me Do I have anything to say about it?

We love you We love you Baron Here's a question for you Baron Do you want to attempt to put out the fire And have that be your action Or do you want to attempt to cut yourself free Cut myself free if I can Alright then first

You're going gonna take some fire damage. You're gonna take another five points of fire damage. Who's running Sirenscape? Do you have a man burning alive sound you can look at? Alright, so not unlike Swallow Hole,

what kind of weapon are we using here? Light slashing or piercing? Plus one hand axe slashing. So you draw it out. This is from Gristlecrack. Way back in the day. Using their weapons against them like an Inquisitor should. Yeah. So you draw it out, move action, and you are grappled.

So give yourself the grappled condition. Oh, absolutely. Thank you for reminding me. Just trying to keep you honest. Oh no, it was escape artist checks. Remember we discovered that we'd been doing grappled wrong. Escaping a grappled hole. Just trying to keep you honest. But didn't we... Oh, no, it was escape artist checks. Remember we discovered that we'd been doing grappled wrong, escaping a grappled hole wrong. Well, no, you apply the grappled condition to the person trying to maintain the grapple as well. Yes, in the case of swallow hole, you don't, though. Got it.

Just the grapple-y. Here we go. We're going back to a classic. Big Reddit served me well. Handaxe. Fucking. 16. That is a miss.

Is it even remotely close? Do I have a bottle cap? He could do anything. You get the sense that this is gonna get ugly fast. Oh boy. I should read up how many guys can fit in this cage. It's coming up on my turn again.

Fey Rasa. Fey Rasa. What are coming up on my turn again. Feyraza. Feyraza, what are you going to do here? All right, here's my question for you first. You're a magical lady. Can you describe this cage? What's it look like? Is it burning wood? It is burning wood, yes.

So here's what I would like to do. I'm listening. I would like to cast Warp wood And open up an opening for Baron to get out Oh Warp wood He would get a save Okay It's not like specifically applied to this So it would be a little bit of a

But doesn't it like directly damage wooden constructs Like isn't that part of the spell You cause wood to bend and warp Permanently destroying its straightness, form, and strength. A warp door springs open or becomes stuck, requiring a strength check to open at your option. A boater ship springs a leak, warped range weapons, blah, blah, blah.

And then I can use it to... It's a castle for how many small objects you can do, but I'm really only pointing it at one. I mean, you tell me if I need to warp different spokes of the, or, you know, bars. Sure, sure, sure. I mean, this basically is like a caged door. It's a huge caged door. How much wood can it affect?

I mean, I can do... How much wood would a warp wood warp if a warp wood could warp wood? Exactly. I can do ten small wooden objects. Okay. And a large object counts as four. You're losing me. A huge object counts as eight.

So... What's a colossal object? Well, I'm not trying to warp his whole body. Sure, sure, sure. I'm trying to warp one door, one man-sized door. So what's a medium? One bar. Yeah, one medium.

Or bust a door open. Yeah. So it'd be two small objects, so I could do it... Here's a question. How did he put him in the cage? It was open already. And then it closed. And then it closed automatically. So it could be a door, right. Here's a question. How did he put him in the cage? It was open already. And then it closed. And then it closed automatically.

So it could be a door, right? Yeah, it could be a door. We've shoved into the cage built in his chest. Yeah, it's a cage built in his chest. Favorasa. The best! Love it. Let me look at the picture here.

Can we have s'mores later with the sound effect? I know. It's intense fire. I want to tell ghost stories. I'm looking at the picture on Roll20. It is not, in fact, a door. He just puts you in between the bars of his body. So you could warp the wood.

Is it going to be enough for Baron to get out? No, but you know what I'd do? I'd give him a bonus. I mean, I would lower the AC of the creature to escape. Okay. For him to cut himself free if he fails the save. Okay. So DC 16 will.

DC's not a gimme. Certainly not a gimme. Natty 15. God. He's on fire. He is on fire. So is there. What is the bottle cap situation, by the way?

Did we ever figure that out? Let's check out the board. I feel like the board isn't right because it looks like there's two. But didn't we get a board that you were specifically administering so that we would know exactly what was right at any given time? Well, right now I'm seeing Matthew 1, Skid 1, Joe 2. That's what leaves me suspect. How did Joe earn two caps? That is correct.

Here's part of the problem, though, too, is the board is now obscured behind our very generously donated giant map of Galarian. So you're the only one that can see it. We don't know if you're telling the truth or not. It's true. Well, I gave you guys four Wildcats. I saw it. now obscured behind our very generously donated giant map of Galarian. So you're the only one that can see it. We don't know if you're telling the truth. It's true. Well, I gave you guys four Wildcats.

I saw it. Joe saw it. So it does say, excuse me, Matthew 1, Skid 1, Joe 2. I will honor the board.

I have mine right here. I will honor the board. All right. Since I now know that information, I guess I'll use that Wildcat on another spell.

I purposely held that information from you. Farazza will then, she is a giant owl. She'll take off flying. Okay. Up into the air. I'm going to Cozumel. Sorry, Grant. I tried.

That was the best I could come up with. No, thank you, Matthew. That means a lot for someone who I want to murder. It is now for Bears' turn. Oh, man. Okay. Four Bears is not going to shy away from this fight with the Herseer. He is going to use a swift action to enact Giant's Bane on his mace.

Yeah. So it's going to become a baney base on his mace. Yeah. So he's going to become a baney base. A baney little base. A baney little mace. And he is then going to close. This is the problem, is the attack of opportunity, but never going to get better than this.

He used it on Bartholomew, unless he has combat reflexes. I was talking about the herseer. Because... I wasn't paying attention. But you have reach as well, so you should be able to avoid that. You don't have to leave... He has 15 feet.

Oh, because he's extra long. He is extra long. We're talking about Pinky and the Bane. So what I'm going to do... I forgot to roll a dark vision check for Pembroke's touch attack. Well, too late. I got off the chest. Just reminding, this effigy's touch attack. Well, too late. Hands off the chest. Just reminding.

This effigy you said is casting light all around him. No, you're right. It's a giant thing on fire. That's true. I forgot about him. It's several hundred torches. Yeah. This massive burning statue.

This is good because I don't have dark. Four Bears is going to move. I've got a rough one for the herseer. Four Bears is going to move and put himself between the herseer and the giant statue. Okay. And provoke. And in doing so, he will provoke an attack of opportunity. Okay.

You were speaking slow enough that I felt like you were going to say, but he has this power. No, I was just getting the move squares right. Okay. So I want to get right next to him. Right next to him. Give him a hug. Because I can still hit him five feet away. He can't hit me five feet away.

You are now a little bit taller than him. Yeah. With righteous might. Because you're a big drink of water to begin with. He was big already. Yeah. And now you're kind of looking down on him. His mace is like the size of a minivan.

Who's the big man now? That doesn't stop him from seeing you coming and just like spinning his glaive around and just stabbing out with it. 28 to hit. Miss. Oh. Wow. It's a boom. I am then going to bottle cap one swing.

Bottle cap a swing. Because I know I'm just going to roll a natural one. Cap swing. Before that happens. He's second. Ladies and gentlemen. I'm going to cap. He dies.

I'm going to cap one swing with the mace. Well, I only have one swing because I moved. Here it is. That is a 30 to hit. That's a hit. Yeah! Oh, that is beautiful news. Would you have missed on the other swing?

Yes. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. That is beautiful news, Troy. And that is a great roll. That is 30 points of damage. Wow. Whoa!

30 damage. All regular damage, yes damage wow regular damage yes all regular damage yes well it's magical points of magical Bane a damage damage hmm so if you're worried about dr or anything that cuts through I'm just looking I mean of the creature I'm seeing all of his fun things that he does okay okay all right that's that's that's that's cool is that all you got that is all I got I'm seeing all of his fun things that he does. Okay, okay. All right.

That's cool. Is that all you got? That is all I got. I'm moving an attack this round. It's the Wicker Man's turn. First thing that happens, Baron takes damage. Oh, on his turn, too? Oh, two sixes on some d6s here.

16 points of fire damage. Just burning alive while being... Oh, you can't break me. Just imagine. Your beard is catching on fire. Your clothes are catching on fire. And, uh... That was a point of contention. You guys all laughed at me when I brought up that last time. Look, here we are

talking about clothes catching on fire. Oh, wow. Matthew's insecurity. Let's take up a whole half hour of the podcast. Jesus Christ. See a therapist, you asshole. Oh, he's fired up? He's fired up. Actually, you know what? We're skating

into Angry Grant territory. We're skating in. Apollo, baby. I just got, I get free therapy through school. Oh, great. That's another huge benefit

of going to Juilliard. Yeah. That's great. Yeah, they all need that. Not only do you get to like hang out with Kevin Kline, but you get free therapy. One's not connected to the other. Yeah, they all need that. Not only do you get to hang out with Kevin Kline, but you get to pre-therapy. One's not connected to the other.

Yeah, which is what you need after hanging out with Kevin Kline. That's right. It's like, oh, God, I just spent a half hour with Kevin Kline. I need a vent. Capit-a-caza, is Feyraza visible? She is visible. Visible, so I could do a 60-foot ranged attack on you from the Wicker Man? I mean, let's take a look at the ruler.

All right. Oh, boy. I mean, I've already measured it. I was just asking. Have you measured with Pythagoras? The thing is colossally high. That's huge. So it's 55 feet as the crow flies.

But she flew 60 feet at an angle of an air. And he's, what, 40 feet tall? At least. His story is high. Go ahead. Kill me. That's why I want to ask. You don tall? At least. His story is high. Go ahead. Kill me. That's why I want to ask. You don't have any HP.

As far as running away. Oh, no. Matthew. Oh, no. Oh, it's so good you have that free therapy. So basically, he reaches into himself, another part of his body that isn't where Baron is, and grabs like pieces of burning wood and just hurls

this brand at you. I think it's a miss. Unless it's a touch attack. Nope. Ranged attack. 13. Miss. Yes! Praise Jesus. Dodged out of the way. Might have been game

over for me. I can't believe I rolled. That changes what I was going to do next round. And that is all the Wicker Man can do this round. It is a new round. It is Pembroke's turn. Okay. The Pembroke Quartet. Pembroke forgot that to actually take the...

What's Bartholomew's turn? He didn't actually attack. Oh, yeah. Oh, that's right. He came up. He survived the attack of opportunity and never ended up taking his attack. Please. The listeners are screaming right now. Don't forget Bartholomew! Bartholomew could kill him in one hit! He's got only chance!

I feel like a jerk. Bartholomew must save Baron! I just forgot, so I'm going to forfeit that. I'm going to... Take that attack. Yeah, take that attack. Okay. Of course.

You're going to move right up in his business, right? He moved all the way up into him. Okay. All right, so he's going to swing with his glaive. Oh, that's a 17 on the die. That is a 28. 28 is a hit. Okay.

Beautiful. And that is... And tell me what type of damage. Physical damage. That is physical damage. Okay. That is 11 points of damage. Okay. That's last round. Question for you, Troy. Yes. Did doing

that range attack provoke an attack of opportunity from Bartholomew? Very interesting question, Matthew. You've been playing this for 173 episodes. It is a ranged attack, so sure,

Bartholomew, you get that for 90 points as well. 90, 19. That is a 16 to hit. 16 misses on the A-0-0. Good call, Matthew. Good call.

Keeping me honest. So I'm going to resolve Bartholomew's full attack. Right in this round now. And that's a hit as well. That's 29. 29, yeah.

Big old target. Just chopping away at its leg. That is 15 points of damage. Beautiful. Okay, okay. Chopping wood. You don't even need me anymore. You have Bartholomew. He's great. He's the new party member. Grant, you get to play Bartholomew after this.

Wouldn't it be awesome if you could summon in a devil with a gun? Oh, that would be great. I want to see that artwork. And the second attack is a 14 hits. 14 misses. And now for Pembroke. Yes. Pembroke is going to invisibly fly back 30 feet. Okay.

Does not provoke because it can't see you. Right. And he is going to use... Can't smell him either. I said, you don't know me. He's going to use the metamagic rod. Okay. To cast magic missile on the herseer. Metamagic rod, magic missile on the herseer.

Oh, my God. Do you realize if Baron falls unconscious in here, he's going to burn alive? I don't know what it takes. I mean, I suspect that if the herseer goes down, that four bears will be in there directly. Well, it just dawned on me. If he goes down, that four bears will be in there directly. Well. It just dawned on me. If he goes unconscious, it's game over. Maybe. The thing that gives me hope is take down the herse here, and there's a spell I'm thinking of.

I'm not going to spoil it. Okay. But it's out there. All right. That I can't cast, but maybe one of you will. Della could cast it. No, no, no. All right.

Bring her back. Dormley would have been able to cast it, I'm sure, no. All right. Bring her back. Gormley would have been able to cast it, I'm sure. So that's 19 points of damage. To the herseer. To the herseer. And what was the spell? That was magic missile. Magic missile. Yeah, that's just going to hit.

And then Pembroke will use his spark staff to cast lightning bolt on the herseer. Ah. So that is a DC 19 reflex save. DC 19 reflex save. Natty 17 on the die. I'm rolling today. So that is a total, so it's a 33, so that's a total of 16 points more damage.

Okay, and just walk me through this because I've got a million things I'm thinking of. You flew over. Yep. You use your metamagic rod for magic missile. Yep. And now this me through this because I've got a million things I'm thinking of. You flew over. Yep. You used your metamagic rod for magic missile. Yep. And now this is your action. This is my action. And you said 16 points of damage?

Yeah. That's the saved damage. That's the saved damage. Okay. And that was electricity? Yes. Okay. All right.

Just reading all my stuff here. All right. All right. He's still alive, at least for now. He might have energy resistance, electricity, fires, like something like that. Yeah. I think we established he has DR.

I feel like we... Yeah, but I think he might also have energy resistance, but we'll see. Well, it is his turn. And he's going to do a full attack action. No, he's not. For Bear. First, he's going to roll a save.

He's got some flesh-eating worms. Ah, flesh-eating worms. DC 23. And he's second. It's. First, he's going to roll a save. He's got some flesh-eating worm. Ah, flesh-eating worm. DC 23, and he's sickened. It's DC 23 fortitude, right? Yeah, sickened. Ah, 26. Okay. So he's still sickened.

Still sickened. Yeah. Okay. Power attack is on. Now, how is he going to do the full attack? Five foot step? Yeah, I think he So I moved very close because of his reach weapon right

Right Can he attack 10 feet and 15 feet away or is it 15 feet And 20 feet away Because I thought from last episode that it was 15 feet or two episodes Ago now no it was last episode That it was 15 feet away was

It's a reach weapon, which allows you to attack beyond the reach of the weapon, right? Right. Your natural reach. Yeah, his natural reach. But so if he has a non-reach weapon, he can attack 5 and 10 feet away.

If he has a reach weapon... Oh, I see what you're saying. Maybe he can attack 10 and 15 and just not 5. That would make sense. That kind of makes sense. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. That would make sense. That kind of makes sense. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. I'll allow it. It is weird, though, because you think about the hilt protector on the edges of swords and stuff. I feel like you could pull back a weapon like that and just stab real close and maybe not do the same amount of damage. But within the rules as written. Yeah. Possibly. Well, I would like to look this up because, I mean, if he hits three times, he could kill

four bears. He won't unless he rolls natural 20s. Oh, you're very confident. So should I just shoo looking this rule up? Yeah, let's roll the dice. You're going to roll it? Hey, you know what? You want to roll the dice?

We're all friends here. I'm going to look it up. Yeah, four bears is imbued with the power of his people. It's going to go. Just don't roll natural 20s. Mm-hmm. And we're fine. We're fine.

So I will take the five foot step back. Okay. Okay. I'll take that back. And now it doesn't make sense to me why he wouldn't be able to attack. But I understand what you're saying. He's going to go ahead and first attack. 26.

Miss. Okay. Now the number just crushes the shield. The number are. Splinters fly off the shield and then immediately come back into the shield. That's awesome. They stop in midair and then suck back into the shield. Awesome. Second attack

at a lower to hit, although a glaive does crit, 19 to 20. That is going to be a 31. Miss. Wow. So this one is going to have to be a natural 20. Matthew, you look like you have some new information.

My new information, I'm still looking it up. All right. So here we go. Come on, four bears. I mean, it's a neon green. It barely rolls 20s. Oh, my God. I can see it.

I can see it. It's a 20, y'all. Holy shit. What an asshole. It's a times three crit. Oh, no. Well, you're not going to confirm it unless you roll a natural 20. With power attack. It's 19 to 20

and times three. Wow. Really? Glaive is one of the best weapons in the game. It has to have some deficiency. I just stood there. You got to confirm it, my friend. I do have to confirm it. You have to roll another natural 20. You got a bottle cap. Where's my bottle cap?

Not confirmed. Okay got a bottle cap. Yeah. Where's my bottle cap? Not confirmed. Okay. Exploding dice. Oh, man. Oh, boy. Shit! Oh, no. Chicken and cheese!

I thought that I could... This is, you know, it's rough. 2d8 plus 31. Oh, wow. I did not roll an 8. So you take 37 points of damage. Oh, my God. Damn.

Well, you know, a confirmed crit would have been 48 plus 62. If we're going to fight, we're going to fight. Evidently. Let's fight. Have you guys read about the Iron Gods campaign? I hear it's really good. Maybe we'll do that next week. Yeah, seriously.

All right. That is the Herseer week. Yeah, seriously. All right. That is the Herseer's turn. I did just look up. I'm trying to figure this out, but you know how tall a colossal creature is? How tall? Generally speaking, 64 plus feet tall. Wow. So it totally nailed you.

Yeah. He was looking down on you. Just tossing. Four feet. No, I was basically at eye level. Tossing rocks. Just tossing rocks. It is like Godzilla.

Hit an owl with a prize. I have an idea if I can live another round or two. I have an idea. Well, here's my idea. Baron, I need to know are you going to try to put out the fire or are you going to try to cut yourself out because it is your turn. Can I take that damage on your turn when you

burn me more? You'll take the damage right now and then you'll take more damage. You forgot to roll one of those, by the way. No, hold on a second. If it's on the creature's turn, does he just, even if he puts the flames out, does he just light back on fire again on the creature's turn? That's a good question. I believe so. I'll look it up.

Then what's the point of it? But basically, if you put the fire out, you're going to take... No, I don't think you'll relight again. I think you just take fire damage. I have to look it up. I should tell you because that... It's like D4 or D6 fire damage. We're talking D6.

You take four D6s every round on its turn. You take one D6 on your turn. I'll just try to escape. Okay, so I have one bottle cap. I mean, I just want to make sure that you're going to be able to escape if it's a successful roll. You know what I mean? Like if you roll a natural 19, it still doesn't work. Take three points of fire damage from the catching fire.

I have a plus 10 to my rolls. You giving him a cap? I think it was close before. I just don't want to roll a natural one at the start of my next round, which I have four attacks, and it'll completely... Like, I know I'll roll something. You won't do it. How are you doing in HP, Bear Bear? 39 out of 120.

In one respect, though, he's safest in there. Give it to me. Is he? Yeah, but if you get out, what are you going to do? You can't do anything. It's just going to put you right back in. You're going to take 40 points of damage in one hit if he hits you. And how are you going to take falling damage getting out?

It's a lunatic. It's a very difficult position to be in. I wish that we cast Fly on each other before we tell the story. Well, if you don't want to give it to me, you're a selfish person. No, no, I'm just trying to have you reason it all out. If you think it's worth it, I'll give it to you. Skid and Matthew also have caps. Oh, I do?

Oh, right. You can have mine, Grant. Matthew no longer has a cap. You can have mine. All right. Oh, because you're running away anyway. Roll twice. I have a different plan to save your life, you asshole.

You want to keep it to save my life? You sure you want that cap? There's nothing the bottle cap can do to help me with my plan. Please save my life, guys. We're talking a 17, though, on the Dizai. Stop it. That's a 27, Xena.

Give me a minus 10 every time you do that. That's a negative 37, Xena. Negative 47. That is a hit. Okay. So roll damage. See, it's a damage thing.

It's not going to do anything. This is fucked up. You're going to have to do like... You guys have cut your way out of every creature that swallowed you whole. Now, granted, they weren't colossal. And they're not going to have hardness and... Ugh. Four. Yes, that was a terrible not going to have hardness. Four.

Yes, that was a terrible, terrible use of a bottle cap. I thought you were going to break out. I forgot you were just rolling. I thought I was breaking out. You see wood splinter out. That's stupid. All right, let's take this. Troy, let's pause for a minute.

I'm going to put myself out. Can I revoke my cap? I had a funny feeling about that. You can take your turn, Ferraza. You just saw a chunk of flaming wood fly right past your head. All right. Ferraza is going to attempt a hover check. That's okay.

Because I want to not be able to move and cast a spell. All right. It is the DC for a hover check. It's DC 15. Okay. And I'm probably going to fail. Okay. So I have to move.

So I can't cast a spell. You don't just fall to the ground for failing a hover check. Okay, so I have to move. So I can't cast the spell. You don't just fall to the ground for failing Arbiter. No, I don't think so. I have Flapping Wing. I was just asking. You just have to, you can't stay there. I can't stay there. I'm just going to move.

So I'm going to circle upwards north of the Herseer fight. And then I, the problem is I had a grand plan to help Baron. Are there any What's the plant life like around here He asks knowing what Troy is going to say The 30th time in book 4 Stall for time Let me just look at the map of Skirgard

Nothing Look at that Do you need another copy of this map I can run over to the copier and make you one They not teach you maps in Julian? In fact, they don't. You probably should have taken cartography instead of playwriting.

Is he Buster Bluth to you? What is he? Alright. I'm just going to cast this little spell called Frostfall. Okay. No, I'm not going to cast this little spell called Frostfall. Okay. Okay. No, I'm not going to do that because I don't want to hit Baron.

All right. So that's not going to work. I'm going to double move then. I'll move back to where you were exactly. Yeah, that's exactly what I'll do. That's my turn. There's nothing I can do Okay Damn it

Damn it So Your hands Your wings are tied My wings are tied Four bears It's your turn Which is why you plummeted to the ground

I want to clarify One thing Baron You can roll a reflex save each round To see if You take that fire damage So can I roll it on the last one? I took 16 last time Well this is the question, it's like can you roll that

Reflex save and still act? Absolutely, rolling a reflex save to avoid Burning is not an action Unless you roll on the ground for a plus 4 bonus Roll once That is a total of a 20 Now roll again for the second time That is a 24 Alright, give yourself Now roll again for the second time. That is a 24.

All right, give yourself four hit points back. There we go. But I'm pretty sure, yeah, every time you take that damage, you catch fire again. That's the ruling I'm making. So you have a chance to not take that extra damage. Wait, I catch on fire when you do your turn? Yes. Your reflex save was just to avoid fire that turn.

On your turn. Basically, you can't avoid being on fire inside this thing. But you can put yourself out of fire every time it's your turn and avoid that extra D6. But that's not an action. But that's not an action. That's free. So you can still try and cut yourself out over seven rounds as you slowly burn alive. Four bears, you're up.

Okay. Four bears is up. He is going to full attack action at the her seer. Okay. He's going to use another action at the her seer. Okay. He's going to use another bottle cap because I don't want to ruin the whole turn. Using caps left and right. Using caps left and right. And this thing crits 19 to 22, Troy.

Show me what you got. Suck it. You can roll a 22? That's amazing. Come on. Come on. Come on. Natural two.

Okay. And a 32. That is going to be a hit. So that is a 32. That is gonna be a hit. So that is a hit and he does 23 points of damage. Nice. And you kill the Hercere. What?

Holy shit! Oh my god, only one attack? The first attack was enough to kill the her seer. Wow. Wow. Holy shit. So part one of your plan has succeeded.

Okay. And then Four Bears is going to call a challenge in Shoanti to this colossus and just stand there like... Awesome. Awesome. I like this. Will I even fit in the cage? Well it is uh the wicker man's turn let's find out because you are within range and he's gonna do some damage you know who really

came out on top in this battle who those flesh-eating worms because they can just go to town now oh that's true oh yeah and feast we gotta sell that fertilizer later to home depot man i really want to hit feyraza with this ranged though, and I can do it once per round. I'm pretty far away now. He's far away. I haven't moved myself on the map. Oh, but you flew farther away. I flew specifically to get out of it.

And that's all he did with his turn. Oh, I forgot to put Baron's token inside of him. Oh, great. Oh, I feel so cozy in here. It's like a little oven. Hush, little Baron, don't say a word. Effigy's going to buy you a burning grill. All right, it's going to be chunky here,

but he's going to go ahead and take a full attack on four bears. So first attack is going to be a 30. Miss. Yes. Is your bonus against giants, or that's just straight up AC? Straight up AC. Okay, just had to check.

Oh, it's not a giant subtype. Yes. Aha. A little reveal behind the screen with Troy LaValle. And Kenneth Potter's back. It's back. By popular demand.

As it turns out. Second attack. I think I'm going to hit you. I don't think you are. Unless it's natural twin zoning. Oh no! No! I did it again! I did it again!

You said it, and it turned into a 20 right when you said it. You have to figure out a way to channel this magic power that you have for good somehow. Oh my god. All that you are able to do with it is fuck yourself. I know, and I really had

some ideas to help Aaron. Damn. You know what makes this all the worse is I just saw so Troy's wearing a Red Sox shirt and when he turned around to celebrate I saw whose jersey it was. Big Papi. Oh god. Such a like trashy dude. I bet after he kills us all. Like a garbage fake treasure from Columbia

here comes the big poppy confirm this is going to be so horribly bad uh 30 to confirm does not confirm does not confirm

we'll see you next week oh no four episodes four episodes ready I think I'm medium rare you You better take me off the grill. What happened to the frost giant?

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