The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 64 - Blix Is For Kids

Episode Date: August 16, 2016

In a chapel sacred to Gelabrous' goddess Desna, the crew confront a long-dead spirit before having to make a vital decision on which way to continue deeper into the fort. For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on the Glass Cannon Podcast... Welcome. I have not seen people in the flesh in many, many years. An imprisoned spirit warns of an insidious evil. In the meanwhile, I've been trapped here. My soul trapped. While Tamin Varius's foul influence still lies within the walls of this fort and reveals what must be done. If you seek to cleanse this place and give honor to the Blix name, you must bring those remains here and destroy them upon this altar. I promise you we will do this.

But the path is treacherous. What's that saying about being a great idea to wake a sleeping giant? Yeah. And the destination, deadly. Oh my god! Shit! Mork! Oh! The adventure continues now. Welcome, one and all, to the Glass Cannon Podcast.

My name is Joe O'Brien, and I just want to say, if you thought we weren't going to have an episode this week, you are a fool, because we have an episode every week. Thank you so much for tuning in, and thank you to all of those listeners out there that submitted on our contests that we did. We did a few contests since my last intro, and we got some fantastic submissions. And despite the fact that I'm thoroughly enjoying reading these amazing ideas, we have to unfortunately close the submission process. It is over, but we have so many great ideas, hundreds of them, that we are literally going through as I record this. And pretty soon, we're going to have winners, and we're going to announce them and send out the prizes. So

keep an eye out for that. A quick thank you once again to Paizo for supporting the GCP community and our desire to play more Pathfinder. Speaking of the GCP community, I'd like to give a special shout out this week to Austin Jute from Cincinnati, who has taken the time to start the Glass Cannon Podcast subreddit. You can check it out at r slash theglasscannonpodcast. There are already dozens of members, and he's looking to expand it into a real community where you all can connect and talk about the episodes, theories, questions you might have, whatever.

If you find yourself wanting to talk about the show and your stupid coworkers are just talking about like the Olympics or the news, then this is the place for you. Log in and you can get your water cooler talk about the glass cannon podcast. Definitely check it out. Well, let's talk about this week's episode.

When we sat down to play this session, we knew that we were going to be quite literally speaking with the dead. Fabian Blix, the great, great grandfather of Calrion Blix. We met Calrion in episode 40. It's called Down the Hatch. If you want, actually go back and re-listen to the beginning of that episode. It might help you more fully appreciate what we're about to hear this week. I can tell you that things are about to get dark. If these episodes had parental warnings on them for what sort of content would be in the upcoming episode, this one would have a few buzzwords.

Strong language, adult themes, and graphic violence, would have a few buzzwords. Strong language. Adult themes. And graphic violence. To name a few. So, I want you to get in the zone for this one. Get ready to hit the lights. It's gonna get dark. Here comes

episode 64. And blackout. What do you guys feel like talking about? Pathfinder and the adventure we're playing. What else? I feel like we haven't talked about other stuff lately. Well, we do, but it's mostly off air.

Yeah. How's life, Troy? It's pretty good. I can't complain. How are you doing i'm okay yeah i'm okay what about you joe uh i feel terrible yeah do you have a long night a little bit of a long night yeah a little bit of brown celebration yeah what were you celebrating uh friend in town yeah that's that's worth getting wasted over yeah you know you wake up never see him again you wake up and you're just like What were you celebrating? A friend in town. Yeah, that's worth getting wasted over.

Yeah, you know, you wake up. You'll never see him again. You wake up and you're just like, what am I doing? Like, what's happening? Things are changing. Why didn't I just not do that? Like, it doesn't make any sense. Grant, how are you doing? I'm feeling great.

Yeah? I was with DD last night, so I had to stay sober. No brown liquor. That's good. Just beers. No brown liquor. That's good. Just beers. Just 20 beers. I'm going to need you guys to carry this if Joe is under the weather.

I'm hydrating. I'll be good. You're the lork of fun. I don't know what that means. Alright, so you guys finally made it to the chapel. Barricaded from the outside. That's always a good sign.

Yeah. You pull that stuff away and then written in blood. Careful. Ventral spirit inside. Stay out. You make it inside. It's a chapel to Desna, of all things. Yeah.

Holy Desna. This seems like more than mere coincidence. And Galabras is going through this stuff right now where he's sort of, not rediscovering, but getting back in touch with his faith. He's feeling Desna's presence all around him. Maybe it's because of your proximity to this chapel. Could have something to do with it.

And then... There are actual chapels to Desna, places of worship, because she's the goddess of travel are very few and far between. There just aren't that many. There are like little shrines and stuff on highways, but there's nothing like this, this like an actual rest stops.

Right. But there's something like this is very rare. Yeah. Little, little candles with the picture of Desna on the side of them. You light up. So here you are. You say, what was the thing you said?

The incantation? The call to dream. And what is the call to dream? It's just like a... It's like the Lord's Prayer for Desna. Yeah, I'm assuming in the week between recordings, you memorized it. Mm-hmm.

Okay. You want to just give it to us? Hey, you say you, you're a butterfly. Oh, I see you in the beautiful garden. Gonna get you, get you, get you, butterfly boy. I'm gonna get you Get you Get you Butterfly boy That's lovely

Thank you Thank you You all get bit of luck For 24 hours On every roll Thank you sub pop And shonen knife So you sing a little song

And A ghostly apparition Of a priest of Desna appears. Introduces himself as Fabian Blix. He's played by Orlando Bloom. Little something for the ladies. Little something for the Delas. You don't know that. He says,

welcome. Welcome. I have not seen people in the flesh in many, many years. What brings you to this fort? Father, peace and blessings of the goddess be upon you. And upon you as well.

We were sent here by a descendant of yours, Calrion Blix. She spoke of you. A descendant of mine? So my sons did yet live oh I have much to tell you what do you know of the history of this fort Kauriyan told us that the fort fell and that she feared that it was at least in part due to some failure of yours.

It was not my failing. Well, hopefully now you can tell her the truth. Is she well? Is she strong? Is she beautiful? She is very beautiful. And she is a fine warrior. Good. The seed is strong. When the orcs pushed south against the blockade,

years and years ago, they attacked all the lines of forts along the border, and Red Lake Fort was no exception. At first, our garrison held strong against the orc hordes, but as the siege went on, the food supplies dwindled, morale was low, and surrounded by orcs and cut off from the rest of the forces manning the blockade with no hope of resupply.

Our defenders soon realized that the fort would not hold. We would either die at the hands of these orcs or slowly waste away from starvation. It was bleak. We all knew we were to die. The castellan at the time, a man named Tammond Various, sought my counsel.

He had an idea, and if I am to blame at all for this, what happened here, it is for refusing him. He came to me looking for assurance that the church would absolve him of wrongdoing on his deathbed. And I said, for what? looking for assurance that the church would absolve him of wrongdoing on his deathbed. And I said, for what? And he said that the only way we could survive was cannibalism. Obviously shocked by this proposal, I provided no such guarantee and instead advised Tammond to just surrender the fort to the orcs in exchange for the garrison's freedom. I truly thought if he just gave the fort over, some, if most, if not all of us would be able to escape.

He argued that the surrender was tantamount to suicide and vowed to hold the fort at any cost. When I responded that the cost might be his soul, Varius went insane with rage and struck me down with his sword. Resolute to what must be done to feed the troops, he locked up this chapel and began murdering those deemed unnecessary for the fort's defense, primarily the families of the soldiers.

I was the first one fed to the garrison. for the fort's defense, primarily the families of the soldiers. I was the first one fed to the garrison. To explain this newly discovered supply of fresh meat, he told the troops that I had been hoarding food in the chapel and when discovered had fled like a coward into the night, just abandoning the garrison to its fate. But instead they were eating my remains. He also told them that for their safety

their families, their wives and children, along with this food supply that I had been hoarding be barricaded inside the chapel and Desner would watch over them and protect them. But in truth he was just killing the wives and the children and feeding them to the troops.

Oh, my God. The chapel was empty. They were slaughtering good people in order to provide sustenance to the soldiers. The soldiers praised the castellan for his foresight and continued to fight, believing that the surrender to the orcs would doom their loved ones,

all the time unaware that their loved ones were dead and inside of them. I rose as a ghost soon afterwards, and lacking any ability to communicate with my family, I appeared to them in dreams, to my wife and to my two young boys. My wife, sadly, did not heed my advice and went to Tammond and scolded him, and she was then killed and fed to the troops. But I saw the last vision of my boys.

I saw them escape through the well, my twin sons. And now you tell me that I have a descendant. It must be one of my sons had a son and had another son and had a daughter. I wonder where my other son is. You'll have to ask, Carrion. I'd love to know. I hope to see her again, and I think she would be pleased to know

that you were steadfast and that it was through no fault of yours that this place fell. I blame myself to this day. In the meanwhile, I've been trapped here, my soul trapped, while Tamin Barius's foul influence still lies within the walls of this fort.

I had a feeling that the reason this place was cursed was from various causes indeed why are you here what brought you here i i asked you at the beginning what brought you here in the first place? This place has become the headquarters for a sort of an army made up of giants and orcs under the banner of the Twisted Nail and Twisted Heart tribes that threaten our city, the city of Chunal. Yes, yes, I'm quite aware. I had to fight many of them off when they first took

over the fort. I've killed many, many of them, but, as I'm sure you noticed, it was barricaded and no one has sought the presence of this chapel in many years. Are you unable to leave the chapel?

I am. Sadly, I believe the only way I can be free is if Various's influence is completely cleansed from this place. How can we do this? How can we free you? Your great,great-great-granddaughter

was very concerned that we be able to do this. I've prayed to Desna about this, and I believe that the only way his vile wickedness could be cleansed is if you find his bones somewhere in here. Bring them to this altar of Desna and destroy them. In the meantime,

I believe his influence lies within many of the rooms of this fort. Do you know how he died? Or where? It is my belief that eventually the soldiers discovered what he was doing.

Captured him. Tortured him. And killed him. Where his body is, where his remains are, is somewhere in here. I can feel that fel influence all around me. And I'm sure the deeper you go into the fort, you will feel

it too. If you seek to cleanse this place, in whatever your reasons are for being here, if you seek to free me and give honor to the Blix name, as you've mentioned, you must bring those remains here

and destroy them upon this altar. I promise you we will do this. Thank you, young dreamer. In the name of Desna. Lork is going to pull Galabras just kind of aside a little bit. And... Ow!

Ow! You're hurting me! Power attack. I pull him aside and whisper because I don't know exactly how to bring it up. And Calabros is really good with breaking bad news. But I remind him that probably this guy's son died in the well and fell. Oh. Broke his neck.

Oh, yeah. Right. If you want to tell him, I think we should. One of his sons, too. One of his neck. Oh, yeah. And if you want to tell him, I think we should. One of us. Obviously, one got out, and that's Calrion's ancestor. But I think his brother died trying to climb down. Right.

I'm reminded by my companion that we encountered the remains of a boy in the well that would be of commensurate age of one of your sons. Aye, and he was bearing the Blix symbol. A ring, I believe.

Just sadness falls over this ghostly face. It didn't have to be this way. We should have just given up the fort. Thank the gods, thank Desna, that at least my line has continued. And this great warrior, perhaps she will bear sons and bring honor to the Blixney. Fist.

Working on it, pal. I'm doing everything I can. I could put in a good word for you. If I was corporeal. She serves the Knights of Ozum with great honor and distinction. Good.

Yomidai is a friend to Desna. You get a bottle cap, Lork. Hey, all right! You get the official Lork bottle cap. It's a Lork bottle cap. Oh, nice. It's got his face on it. Awesome.

Yeah, good call on that. He offers to both heal you if you have any ailments, anything he can do to heal you, and he says that this place is as safe as any both heal you if you have any ailments, anything he can do to heal you. And he says that this place is as safe as any, if you choose, if you need to invigorate yourselves at all,

just come here and you can rest. Home base. Because the orcs and the giants won't dare walk through the doors. Does he know any other tactical information about the fort? You know, would it go anywhere if we asked him, you asked him where Grenzledeck holds up or where... When you mention Grenzledeck,

all he knows is that she was trying to amass a dowry to try and wed this storm tyrant. But because of the failed raid on Trunau and the loss of the treasures there,

the dowry wasn't significant enough to gain the tyrant's interest. That's all he knows is like communicating with Drozha. Drozha has let him know that much. That's all he knows. Which is kind of the same information

you got from Drogia about Gretzeldek. Right. So she was raiding Trunau. What you know is she was raiding Trunau to get this treasure to try and impress someone known as the Storm Tyrant. And obviously, you guys stopped the raid from happening, and now she's gone into some sort of depression.

And so in communicating with droja he finds out what's going on here uh and he's also found out that you guys were coming and when you walked in the room he watched you to see if you were reverent if you were friend or foe and when galapagos started uh chanting and whatnot uh he knew he could reveal himself to you i uh i I turn to Fabian and I say, my friend here could definitely use your blessing. Her name's Ingerheld. She was so scared in the last battle, she wasn't even on the battle order.

She needs the blessings of Desmond so that she might feel well enough to fight along our side. She was practically invisible. Yes. Oh my. She didn't even have a pawn along our side. She was practically invisible. Yes. Oh, my. She didn't even have a pawn. I totally forgot she was with you.

It was the silent spell. Let's be honest. We all did. We all did. Wow. Once did anyone say, where's Ingrid? Yeah, I totally forgot. So we can just imagine she was keeping watch in the guard tower.

Get our back, Ingrid. Ingrid. I'm Ingerhild. Nice to meet you, Fabian. Oh, that's great. Heal me. So Lurk actually does need healing, so does he cast a spell, or is it just we can rest here?

He will channel positive energy. Awesome. Yeah. Or you guys can rest, but it depends on what you want to do well the problem with resting is that you know we expose uh umlo to more danger the longer we take to do this right and right now it's it's morning going into afternoon you know what i mean you guys came at twilight you guys rested through the night woke up at twilight got entered through uh kargik's tent and then you came through here and

fought these guys like for breakfast right um and now you're in here and it's going to be afternoon soon so you can hang out here for a little bit but yeah you would think that later this afternoon is when umlaut's going to have to go again yeah right so he fought last night you hope he lived right it's funny to hearing about uh grenzel deck's plan about trying to woo the storm tyrant which we don't know who it is it makes me think of thanos uh from marvel comics which he's in love with death like the female embodiment of death in the marvel comics universe and so he's to, he like kills like millions and millions of sentient souls to try to impress her. And it's just,

there's, it's, it's fun. I wonder if they were thinking along kind of the same, that inspired the, the nugget of the story. Yeah. That's interesting.

Yeah. Um, you'll have to ask her. I will. Uh, so did you read Avengers? Uh, issues at one 43 giant I will. So, did you read Avengers issue 143?

Giant Size Avengers, too. All right. All right, so you want to get channeled energy. Okay. I just took it. You just took it? You don't even know what it is? I'm sure.

He channels 10 points of healing to all of you. Do you need any more? No, I'm good. Barry Connick Jr., okay? Yeah, he was healed by Galabras last episode. So yeah, Fabian's like, you know, I'm sure you have much to do here, but I sense great goodness,

especially from you, young dreamer. If in your travels throughout the fort you find his remains, please bring them here. Please destroy them and you will free me. On my life, I swear it. Thank you. All right.

So now, what is the plan? You've got about 20 different options. Yeah. Talk it out. Talk it out amongst you guys what the options are.

I'll fill in the blanks. Basically, I feel like we can go towards the keep or we can go back towards the entrance. Right? Towards the, what do you call it, the fighting pits? Yeah. Barbican. There's the Barbican area where you guys were looking over the guard tower. You saw the Ogrekin come up and you ducked down because they heard Baron's double-barreled gun.

Right. Kill a hill giant. And there's stuff going on over there. Then there's the actual these middle buildings that you were standing upon and there's a staircase from where the hill giant was atop there leading down into it as well as a door from the inner courtyard leading in and it's a giant size ladder like would it make sense that the giant it's a staircase that a giant could fit down okay it's not a. It's like descends down into these buildings that separate,

that basically bisect the courtyard, creating an outer bailey and an inner courtyard. And then there is the keep itself. In the inner courtyard, there's doors

on the other side, and you would just know that it's most likely more guard towers. From what you guys have seen, you know, there's doors to the north. They probably just lead to guard towers like the one you guys came in yeah it's like mirrored on the other side right so you've got these buildings in the middle you've got the front with the bear

uh the barbican the bear pits and then another building that the ogrekin was on top of it's it's a small building it's probably like a guard a guard house in there too but it's it's larger so there might be other stuff in there. And then you have this keep. And the keep, you can enter the keep from the second level. So you've got the middle buildings, the keep, and then back at the front. Lork wants to go to the keep. Della agrees.

Yeah, I just feel like we've got to get Grinsaldek as soon as possible. And I think that that's where she is. If we can destroy their leader, that might fracture their ranks anyway, so. Are you saying Lork wants to play for keeps? Beautiful. I got scared, too.

Well, look, I mean, we're going to have to be searching for a while, probably. We're going to have to, like, search all over the place. Oh, right. Because wherever these remains are, they've got to be, by definition, in various places. Okay. You're going to melt down with what's worth, aren't you?

My initial reaction was to play this like a video game and clear out the metal buildings. But I also get wanting to go straight for it. Yeah, I just think that going in the keep has the benefits of We have killed these ogres in the courtyard Their bodies are laying there bleeding The hill giant's dead We unbarricaded the church Somebody's going to see it at some point

And report directly to Grenzledeck Who might be able to rouse some support from some of the orcs Or maybe through sheer threat and we know that karguk would turn on us in a second if the giants were about to kill them all you know he would be like oh yeah we'll kill him so uh and lork just feels like that's where the giants are and he just wants to hunt giants so that's my reasoning behind the keep. Yeah, Granslodek right now is in one location. Now that the alarm is about to be raised or has been raised, the longer we wait to go after her, the least likely she'll be there.

Yep. So we do it? I turn to Lork before we go on this plan of action and I say I killed Screed before we could do anything else we made the mistake with Malira to let her live and look at how that bit us in the ass

I would like to make sure that we end her life completely if we come to fight her if she I'm constantly in this position we end her life completely if we come to fight her. I'm constantly in this position in Pathfinder games where you let a boss live for two more seconds and they escape or do something more devious.

I just want to slit her throat. Yeah, it would. Oh, yeah, yeah, that too. So, yeah, I just want assurances, and I think Lork would be on my side of just straight up ending the life of this giant. Oy, but we need information on this Storm King as well. It's true.

Yeah. All right. We good to go? Let's go. Do you have any other questions for Fabian while he's here? How did you fight and kill the orcs and giants and ogres that you said you fought before they barricaded you? Desna's powers run through me, not unlike your friend here. I am a powerful cleric.

Oh, you know what we should do before we leave? We should erase the danger, vengeful spirit within, and say, come inside, free orc food. Or like free giant food. Free lemonade for giants. Yeah. All right. Let's move to the keep.

Moving to the keep. Up the stairs, across the plank. And I just assume Grunseldick will be right inside. You guys combat. You guys come outside. Just everyone roll a perception check real quick. Twelve. Twenty-three. Twenty-four. Twelve.

On your way to the platform, which isn't too far away, Lork and Della see these double doors that lead into these middle buildings just shut really quickly. Like something saw you and then shut the door. Oh, boy. Somebody doesn't want us going to the keep. I need to know so badly.

That's all you see. And only Lorcan Dulles see it. Well, all right. So that suggests to me that might be the other orc spies. The other orc spies. The other orc spies. Well, they never came back. We don't know that they died. We just know that they never came back.

I think if they're alive, they're hidden in those buildings. Right. Well, he said he sent two, did he specify? So there's only one left. Yeah, it looks like one left. Or there could be something else we just don't know about in here that is not as wantonly aggressive as a giant or an ogre um okay so we got the sense from our perception check that whatever it was saw us not just saw the carnage in the courtyard yeah um

it was just like well i'm i'm still in for the keep, unless anybody wants to change it. I'm in for the keep. Speak now. Though it seems like our DM is subtly hinting we should go to the middle. Dome at a game. Dome at a game. I'm just telling you what you saw. Yeah, I'll tell you that Lorca's thinking that maybe this, you know,

maybe we've been seeing the carnage has been seen, and they're going to tell somebody. But I doubt that we're going to track them down. So I'm like, let's just get in the back way and get to the fort before they can get to us. I think that makes the most tactical sense. I kind of want to hunt them down, but I'll go with majority rules. All right, so you guys make your way towards the keep. Yeah, up the stairs.

Up the stairs. It's a single file. Talk to me about the order, and what are you guys doing? way towards the keep. Yeah, up the stairs. Up the stairs. It's a single file. Talk to me about the order, and what are you guys doing? Just walking up and in? Order. I'm happy to go first unless somebody else wants to. Lork's happy to go first unless Della wants to go invisible or something. No, I'm fine with just walking.

Okay. Lork will go first with Barry, and he'll do a perception once he gets to the landing there, looking inside and see what he sees, at least from the outer parts. Sure. 15. Yeah, so obviously you see the keep is built straight into the southwestern corner of the fort. You walk up the freestanding stone staircase, start looking from the drawbridge in,

and you see a large open chamber that looks like it's been gutted. Inside? Inside. Okay. Like you see chunks of walls where walls used to be. And like exposed, what are they called, joists? Sure. Like jutting from the walls, like branches.

Joists, I don't know what that is. Joists, they're like wall supports. Flying buttresses. Flying buttresses. Get your hands off my buttress. Cranulated buttresses. Okay, I am going to move cautiously inside. Okay, you walk inside, move cautiously inside. Okay. You walk inside

and you see a very strange sight. It's a large room, but the ceilings are only ten feet high. And there's debris everywhere. So it's difficult terrain for any medium-sized creature.

Wow. Just rocks all over the place. No, it's difficult terrain for any medium-sized creature. Wow. Just rocks. No, it's just like broken pieces of wall. Like, you can tell there used to be three or four walls here, but it's been gutted to make more space. Room for giants. A little interior decoration. Difficult terrain for everybody, unless you're

a large-sized creature, you could easily move over it. Okay. And there are a couple of large creatures in there. Oh, no. Right when you walk through the door, you see piles of smelly furs in the corners of the room, and one hill giant is waking up another hill giant when it sees you.

Oh, no. Roll for initiative. Oh, no! Oh, no! Okay. Okay. Ooh! Oh no. Roll for initiative. Oh no! Oh no! Okay. Oh yeah.

It's about to go down. All right, we got no surprise rounds. We got just two hill giants, four heroes, and a bear. I should have said four heroes and a lork. Alright, who's got over 20? 15 for lork. 15 for lork. Della, 27 again? 16 for Della. 16 for Della. Always one-upping. Baron? 16 for Baron. Baron wins. Baron wins

in the Della Baron initiative battle. That's true. What about Galapagos? 11. Oh! Not too shabby. Yeah, I rolled an 11 on the die. All right. Where's Ingerhild?

Oh, where is Ingerhild? She is with you, and she... This week, she's playing. And she hates giants. Okay, she is after Lork and Bericona Cheetah, before Galabras. Okay, so you guys walk into the room, and Lork, you see two hill giants.

One is rousing the other one up from its smelly furs. Caught them napping. Not really, they're awake now. These are hill giants. This is what Baron just shot the cheek off of and eventually killed with a double-barreled gun, but that hit him once for significant damage. And the same hill giants that almost killed poor Galabras on the patrol. Baron, you're up.

Oh, oh, yeah. So Baron moves in as far as he can to the room. And you're moving half speed. Oh, yeah. Remember, it's difficult terrain. So Baron is going to hold his action until people clear out in front of him because I would end my turn. I'm going to move after them because I would have to end my turn in there. So you're just holding your action.

Yep. Okay. Baron holding his action. Della, kind of in a similar situation. Della is going to step into the room and to the left okay so Della just throwing caution to the wind well she's gonna rushes through and hug the wall yeah yeah on the left and magic missile magic

missile now how many magic missiles you have I have three okay if I take away all the extra ones you got over time you have negative two magic missiles. Let's just even it out right now. All right, so three magic missiles, all the same one, or are you spreading them out? I'm going to do it all against the one

that was rousing the sleeping one. Okay, so that's the one on the left. The sleeping one is tucked away there in the corner. Eight points of damage. Eight points of damage. Boom. Okay. Lork, what do you want to do, buddy?

Oh, man. This is tough. These are your favorite characters. Giants. You love giants. Yeah. Yeah, it's tough because I would just want to charge in at them, but I can't because the floor is completely riddled with broken walls.

It's as if someone wrote this really well. Oh, and Della's scimitar is on fire, by the way. Classic Della. You're going to get something burned down with that, Della. Lork is going to slide to his right where Della went left. He's going to slide to the right and shoot, quick draw his bow

and shoot an arrow at the one that is rousing the other one. With this time, we're going to hit Lork. Yep, natty 19. Natty 19. So the one that Della just hit, you come in and boom. Boom with the arrow. 14 points of damage.

Holy shit. Now, correct me if I'm wrong, you forgot to add favorite enemy to hit and damage all Holy shit. Woo. Now, correct me if I'm wrong, you forgot to add favorite enemy to hit and damage last week. All last combat. Yep. But I remembered it this time. Nice, 14 points of damage.

Great job. Barry Connick Jr. Barry is going to just move into the room. Okay. Barry comes into the room. Inga is going to draw her bow. Well, Baron can go now. Oh, Baron, now you want to go.

So I'm going to move as far as I can, which is 10 feet. Right. And I am going to shoot. That's 20 feet or 30 feet away, the giant. That's 20 feet. Oh, great. So I'm going to get, just shoot him. It's the old touch AC.

That is a 27 to hit. Yes. I don't think anything has a touch AC of 27. That is 16 points of damage. Oh, man. Great. Great. I mean, you see the importance of initiative now when there's no

surprise rounds. For each of you to be able to go pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop and get all these hits in, you've really done some serious damage on this first guy. Good job. Do you have another shot or no? You moved to get into that position. I could, by the way, we are stupid. You guys already read it, but I should have rolled for each of my

pistol pulls that other time. So I could potentially pull another, but I haven't already subtracted four, so it's too late. I'm going to allow it. Okay, Ingrahild is going to double move into the room, and she's got her axes in hand. So she's not going to get very far because of the difficult terrain, but she's just

rushing up to try and join the fray because she really hates Juts. Oh, I bet she does. Two axes out at the ready. Galabras. You guys all rolled higher initiative than the hill giants. I'm going to move up behind Baron and Della and

reach out and touch Della with a bit of luck. Oh, thanks. Alright. Like it, like it, like it. Desna is flowing through Galabras right now. Hill giant time. All right, the first one comes up. And mind you, these guys aren't affected by the difficult terrain. And attacks Ingehild.

Way to just use her as a meat shield. Okay. 20 to hit. Hits Ingehild with a great club. Jeepers. Oh, man. The one who was waking it up has a great club in hand. Heard you guys coming.

The other one just has fists. Its great club is next to it. Hits Ingehild for 22 points of damage. Oh, my God. Really bad hit on Ingehild. And then the second one comes up, and... God, you've got Barry Connick Jr. and Ingehild are in the vanguard right now. Can I make an argument?

Sure. If you said that thing was sleeping, I would think that it would have to get up and then move. Right. That would be its full turn. That's fair, yeah, because it was, you know. It was rousing. It was rousing it, so it stood up

and it used the rest of its movement to get up into the group. So it'll probably be a little bit back, a little bit behind its friend. So the first guy just comes up, boom, nails Ingehild, and now you see Ingehild get rocked. And the other one.

That was amazing. Good. That was amazing. Good. Round two, Della. Baron. Oh, no, Baron moved. I'm going to, Della's going to rush up to the one who struck Ingehild, roll acrobatics, try to avoid the attack of opportunity. Okay.

I get to roll twice, and because of my vexing defender trade, I get to add plus four to my roll. You son of a gun. So I got plus 16 on my acrobatics. Vexing defender. Love it. Natural 14, so 30. 30, you make it. add plus four in my roll. You son of a gun! So I got plus sixteen on my acrobatics. Vexing Defender! Love it. Natural fourteen, so thirty. Thirty, you make it. Yeah! Alright! So I tell her that's her, you know, scimitar dance, so like, roll in,

and then I'm gonna swing at it with my, and it's swift action, keen my scimitar. Oh, shit! So now it is a keen, flaming scimitar. And I'm gonna swing at the giant. Roll twice. Oh, the critical threat. going to swing at the giant roll twice oh the critical threat and roll twice to confirm it 23 to confirm confirm I love Wow teen man that's awesome well you're really seeing, you guys are really stretching your sixth level legs now.

Yeah. Ugly wound. Oh. That sounds ugly. Normal damage and one D3 charisma damage and one charisma drain. Oh. So you basically slice at its face and it makes it even uglier. Yeah, it was so attractive before.

I was going to ask my girlfriend to marry me, and now I can't. 15 damage, five of which is fire. And then if you care, two charisma damage. So you come in, swing, and you lop its nose, clean off of its back, and just blub, blub, blub,

shooting blood out at you, covering your translucent skin. Lork, you are, excuse me, uh lork you are excuse me della you are a crit machine uh lork man bounce this party out with a one oh man that's what i'm

here for uh all right lork is going to step into the fray uh and take a an attack of opportunity from the giant all right so this one uh is just and take an attack of opportunity from the giant. All right, so this one is just slamming. And 21 to hit.

That hits. So you come up with the other one that was rousing itself, and it just, boom, punches you for eight points of damage. Ooh, okay. I get past that and swing, uh, which we'll call Gorham's thorn, uh, at this giant. Come on. It is. I keep forgetting also that Gorham's thorn is keen.

Yeah. It's always keen. So that's 19 to 20, 17 to 20. Oh, awesome. Yeah. Really? Yeah. Um, so 24 to So 24 to hit.

24 to hit, hits. And it does 22 damage. Wow. Screw! I said a few episodes back that this party was just a strange makeup, and that's why you guys were having so much trouble, but now with the addition of the Magus, you guys are really coming into your own. It really fills

a Magus-sized hole that we didn't know we had. Boo! Barry. Alright, Barry is I forgot to do this. I keep forgetting to do this. He's going to do Thank you, Della, for reminding me. He'll do an acrobatics check to avoid the attack of opportunity.

Almost certainly will fail. 17. Fails. Takes a hit. And now is this the one without the weapon? Yeah, this is the one without the weapon. So Lork and Barry are on one of them. Della and Ingrid are on the other. 18 to hit. 18 to hit.

That is a hit, but I will enact my bolster companion and it does not hit. And it's a miss. I'm like, Barry, watch out! It dodges. That is either your third or fourth bolster companion of the day,

so keep an eye on that. Third, okay. Third of the day, and I have five. All right, Barry can now attack. Barry is going to bite. Power attack bite. And 16. No.

Barry has not had a successful hit. He's not keeping up his end of the bargain here with the team. He is not. Baron. Baron has line of sight on the unarmed giant. Just barely. Yeah, it's going to get a bonus to its AC because you're shooting through,

and it's a minus four to hit. I'm shooting through a square, though. It's a large creature. I see what you mean. I can allow that. That's fine. Minus four to my roll. Minus four to your roll, yep, because you're shooting into melee. I'm going to rapid shot at it.

Okay. This is the sleeping giant. The first one's going to be up close and deadly, which I totally forgot when I hit level six is now 2d6 additional damage. Oh, wow. Oh, shit. Man, level six is fun. That is a 11 against Touch AC.

That's a hit. Nice. Now, these things are so big. Touch AC is low. Damn. That is 16 points of damage. 16 points of damage 16 points of damage We'll chew ones on the six-sided dice

Second attack Sneak eyes There you go That is I didn't call it ahead of time So it's regular Roll for damage Yeah

12 points of damage Nice job Third shot And final What the fuck about third shot? Boom, boom, boom. Nobody will hear this. It's a misfire.

It's a misfire. But it's worth it. I'm glad I did it. All right. So wait a minute. You don't have to reload between three shots? I get three reloads. Okay.

Because of rapid reload and paper cartridges. Got it. Awesome. So you can do unlimited free actions, right? Yes. Okay. In of rapid reload and paper cartridges. Got it. Awesome. So you can do unlimited free actions, right? Yes. Okay. Ingra Hilt. Now she's about to do four attacks.

Let's see those axes of work. All right. Let's do work. Ingra Hilt. She really hasn't contributed enough to this group. It's really hard to Contribute when you forget To put her in the combat All together

Yeah Alright First attack We got so many emails about that Dwarven War Axe Misses Second attack Misses

Masterwork Hand Axe Hits On the Masterwork Hand Axe And then the last attack Misses So four attacks She only hits once And does five points of damage

To the The giant The noseless giant. The noseless giant. Man, that could have been a lot more damage. This wasn't happening. Galabras. I'm going to move up behind Della and give her another bit of luck. Della is a murderer with a bit of luck.

Okay. One, the noseless giant. Two attacks on Della. Oh, boy. All right. First swing with the great club. 22 to hit. Miss.

Oh, no, that's it. Sorry, I didn't take the shield off. Boom. 23 points of damage. Oh! Second swing with the great club. with my neon green D20. Less of a chance to hit. Misses.

Yeah. All right. I was going to say natural 20. He says that so often. Yeah, I know. Okay. Okay. The sleeping giant.

What's that saying about being a great idea to wake a sleeping giant? Yeah. Always do it. As long as you're in a room where you can't move well, I think. Yeah, right. Can you cleave with a natural attack? Yeah. Why not?

All right, so it's going to attempt to cleave Lork and Berryconic Jr. So it's just going to punch with a slam, come down and try to hit. So this first attack is on Lork. Misses, so it doesn't get the cleave. And it doesn't get the cleave. You guys caught these giants unawares. Della, with a bit of luck, round three, show me what you got. Do you have four or fewer hit dice? Do these giants

have four or fewer hit dice? I doubt it. No. No. Then Della is just going to do and she's going to swing her flaming scimitar, rolling twice. Good thing I rolled twice because I rolled a natural one and a seven, so

15 to hit. 15 misses. Oh, no! Two attacks? I don't have two attacks. And then... Shit. Oh, man. Oh, boy.

No five-foot steps. I know. That's why I was... Yeah, no five-foot steps. There's nothing I can do. Yeah, I'm done. All right. Okay.

Della does not hit the giant, and it is now Lork's turn. Let me just say, they haven't done a lot of damage to you. I'm going to change things up if you let them live to their turn, and you're not going to like it. Lork, what are you going to do? Lork is going to... I just took 23 in one hit. He's got two attacks with Gorim's Thorn.

Okay. So, great sword. First attack. Natural one. Oh my God. Oh no. Every week. Come on. Alright, you can roll to confirm. Roll to confirm.

Natural two. Oh, confirmed. Confirmed. Fumble. F Fumble Jesus Christ For Lork You've been handed the card By your good friend Galabras This just Is now gonna turn so

This is gonna be Man Lork's gonna Lork Awkward attack You take a minus two penalty To AC For 1D4 rounds Oh

That's bad That's not good That doesn't matter At least I'm in the combat Giant's gonna be rolling One round One round One round Minus two AC

Okay Could've been worse Definitely could've been worse Way worse You're still standing I can still fight at least Oh well that was my first swing I get a second swing

Yep I get a second swing That's another natural one I'm gonna pick my pants My favorite enemy here No And it hits 23

23 does hit 23 does hit And I do 24 points of damage. Yeah! There you go. Oh, all right. It is now teetering. Teetering. All right.

Barry has to say. Come on, Barry. Take it out. It's not impossible for Barry to. Full attack action. Claw, claw, bite. Claw, claw, bite. All power attacks.

Here we go. Claw. Miss. Claw. 17, bite Claw, claw, bite All power attacks Here we go Claw Miss Claw 17 Miss Miss Bite Miss

God damn it Barry Barry This Barry is not working out Barry, you racist, paranoid fuck I know I am I'm no longer gonna bolster Barry

I'm just gonna let them kill him That's a good plan He's useless Barry's gotta go Barry's gotta go Oh boy Alright I am no longer going to bolster Barry. I'm just going to let them kill him. That's a good plan. He's useless. Barry's got to go? Barry's got to go. Oh, boy. All right.

We need a new entertainer. All right, yeah, Barry, I don't know. I think we've got to do more with him. Baron, you've got that clear line of shot with that sleeping giant. Not now that Ingerhild's moved up. Well, maybe kind of. But anyway, my gun's jammed. Going gonna shoot with a jam and hope for the best right this is this is where grit economy comes into place i only have one grit point left

for the day unless i gain more all right so i could spend a grit point to clear my gun as a move action and still shoot but i'm gonna keep that that grip point and just clear it as a standard action and stay where I am. Okay, so Baron... I'm going to move 10 feet. Well, no, that's not going to give me a better line of sight. I can't really move anywhere where I get a better shot or I'll type move. It's getting really... This room, even though it's been cleared out to make room

for the giants, it kind of bottlenecks here and widens towards the back of the chamber. So yeah, everything is clumped right here at the door. So Baron just uses standard action to just get this fucking cartridge out of here, damn it! All right, Ingerhild, four attacks. First attack, natural 20.

Oh, there we go. Roll to confirm, natty 19. Yeah! Ingerhild crits! Oh, she might have just saved Ella's life. Yeah, seriously. All right, it is a slashing weapon. Overhand chop.

Double damage. And 1d4 bleed. And mind you, that is a Dwarven War Axe, so double damage for her is times three damage. Yeah, that's right. So times three and bleed. We were just saying. Why is there gunfire? Joe, you need right. So times three and bleed. We were just saying. Why is there gunfire?

Joe, you need to move to a better neighborhood. This is ridiculous. I clearly hit something and the Sirenscape is firing a gun over and over and over. Ingrid Old has four attacks.

She crit on the first one. Times three, 1d4 bleed, max damage. Oh my God. 14 times 3 do it in your head 42 points of damage

and she kills the giant oh my god that is awesome and since she still has movement left she will start moving towards the back of the room so she will start moving and avoiding attacks of opportunity

she can't get very far because of opportunity. You moved her too far. Yeah, she can't get very far because of the difficult terrain. And actually, we're going to leave that body there just to clog the room a little bit, make it tough. So she strikes down that giant that was about to power attack Della for two attacks. Which would have been brutal. Okay. Thanks, Inga. Galabras, one giant left.

One giant left. You can't kill it. I'm going to channel. Ah, Ingo. Galabras, one giant left. One giant left. You can't kill it! I'm gonna channel. Ah, okay. Eight. Points of healing. Eight points of healing to the group. Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum.

Della shouts back her thanks. You're welcome. Lorik feels reinvigorated. Okay, the hill giant. Okay The hill giant The last one The last one here What are they doing here? They clearly cleared out this room To make room for giants to move around

But what are they doing here? And why weren't they on better guard? This place is falling apart Slam number one at Lork 24 to hit That's a hit Slams Lork for Don't know why I rolled a hit. Slams Lork for, don't know why I rolled a D4.

Slams Rork. Slams Mickey Rork for 10 points of damage. Goes to slam again, 20 to hit. Hits. Hits for another nine points of damage. So boom, boom, 19 points of damage. You just feel these fists hit you,

a feeling that you probably haven't felt, you know, until recently for years. Right. And this is really... Toe to toe with the giant, man. You're getting the physical memory of fighting giants back again as a fist the size of your head

hits you in the chest twice. All right. Round four. Della, what you gonna do? So how can I get... Is there a space there that I can move in next to Lork to attack the roll acrobatics? Yeah, you're gonna have to roll ac can I get... Is there a space there that I can move in next to Lork to attack the roll acrobatics?

Yeah, you're gonna have to roll acrobatics. What's your movement? 30 feet. That's 15 feet. No, you can only move 5 feet. You can either go in there and provoke or...

Oh, because it would go at half speed. Because you have to go at quarter speed. You can probably survive the hit. You can move at full speed and roll it, but it's a CMD plus 10

Let's do that Okay, so CMD plus 10 CMD plus 10 I mean, I'm not going to get it, but I need the help Because basically, instead of moving half speed Which you wouldn't have been able to get over there You add a plus 10 33

CMD plus 10 would have been 32 Wow You made it Flaming, Keen, Scimitar Yeah CMD plus 10 Would have been 32 Wow Oh my gosh Wow You made it Wow that's incredible Flaming Keen Scimitar

What a dancer 14 to hit Yes Well at least you didn't get hit That was nice Alright Lork That is a crazy Awesome acrobatics roll

Okay Vexing Defender What does that give you A plus 4 It gives you a plus 1 Normally But if they're bigger than you Plus 4 To avoid attack Awesome Uh, okay. Vexing Defender. What does that give you? A plus four? It gives you a plus one normally. But if they're bigger than you, plus four. To avoid attack comfort.

Awesome. Spoiler alert. You're going to fight a lot of enemies that are bigger than you. It's a giant slayer trait. That's awesome. That's awesome. All right, Lork is, uh, he's going to kill this thing. You and Matthew are still sitting on bottle caps.

First swing, natural 20. Get out of here! Yes! Trip it! I know, right? What a wasted trip. To confirm. 19 to confirm.

19 exactly. Yeah! Confirmed crit! Confirmed crit for Lork. I think last episode you rolled a 1 and a crit in the same episode. This episode you rolled a 1 and a crit. Oh, shit. He's very excited.

Parrying strike. Double damage and plus 4 AC for one round. It's not going to matter. It's not going to matter. Oh, boy. Was this a power attack? Lork said he was killing it, and he's going to kill it. Yeah, power attack.

42 points of damage. So Lork brings Gorham's Thorn up over his head and cleaves it straight through its chest, like right above the nipples, and half of its body falls from its body. And it just collapses. Yes. And you guys, blood just blah, blah, blah, blah, pouring out everywhere. You're covered in blood. He turns to Barry Connick Jr. and he says, that's how you do it.

Do, do, do, do. Benghazi, Benghazi. And that's it. You killed the hill giants. Oh, man. Good job. Wow. That was fun.

Now I'm sweating. Man, you guys are really coming into your own. Yeah, for real, man. Let's knock out Angerhild's crit there. No, that was huge. Okay. Now let's take a look at this room. Is that the most crits we've had in one combat?

That was a lot. I mean, between this episode and last episode. Well, between the two keen weapons, that's the... Yeah. But you guys are rolling 20s on your... Yeah, I haven't used my... You've been rolling 20s. I'm rolling 18s and 19s,

so even without the keen, it would still be crits. Mother ever. Mother ever. All right. We also both fumbled, so... Yeah, true. So, in addition to all that I've described so far, the broken down walls, the joist,

the word you didn't know what it meant, and the smelly furs, and now two dead giants, you see three sets of double doors. Oh, okay. Exiting this entrance hall to the keep, or what was once an entrance hall. To the right is a set of double doors that you guys would just know

is going to lead back to the latrine area. Remember when you exited the latrine, there were double doors to your right and doors straight up, and you guys went up. And then you went along the curtain wall and came to the bunk room had you taken a right you would have walked right into this room got it okay so that's

the doors to your right you need not worry about them there are doors to your left and there are a set of double doors to the center uh is there and can i do a perception check on the furs i want to see if there's anything in there of interest or if they're just disgusting sleeping giants yeah you don't even have to roll a perception there's nothing in there just yeah they're sleeping in their own i do i pick up the giant's nose that got cut off and i just tuck it into my belt pouch oh gross shades of gormley yep uh and they were they were really grumpy probably from having to stoop in this room. It's only 10 feet high. Oh, so they were

stooping the whole time? Yeah, I mean, more flavor-wise. They're just like a little ornery. Yeah, and their heads are like right up at the ceiling.

Right. Yeah, like if Galabras had any ENA check left, he would have burst through the ceiling or had to roll to try and burst through the ceiling.

Della appeals to Galabras for a little consensual wanding. Sure. Yo, girl, I'm always there for you. You could always channel, too, because I'm also down 20.

Well, four points from the wand for you, and then I will channel again. Ten. All right. That's good. That's great.

Okay. Yeah, so double doors to the right. You know where they lead. Double doors Yeah, so double doors to the right. You know where they lead. Double doors straight ahead. Double doors to the left. And in all of your maps so far, you don't know what's going on here. Right.

All right, Lorkel, turn to Baron and go left. I like left, and I quickly walk with my hand along the wall, feeling for secret doors the entire perimeter. Stone cutting. Okay, roll stone cutting. That is a 15. No, 60. Yeah, you don't see anything.

All right. It's just these three sets of doors in front of you. And can I just roll perception, looking at the walls and floors I'm going? Della will join Natural one Twelve for Della So We have some

Beautiful picture windows Outlooking the courtyard Does anyone have Dungeoneering To be able to tell What might be behind These doors Or anything like that

Or would that even count I mean I have Dungeoneering But I mean we have The map It looks like a Smaller room Maybe with stairs

Going down Possibly or spiraled Or up Or up Let's go Let's go left engineering, but I mean, we have the map. It looks like a smaller room, maybe with stairs going down, possibly, or spiraled. Or up. Or up. Alright, let's go left. Alright, I'm going to do a perception check on the door for traps. 31. 31.

It does not appear to be trapped. Okay. I will attempt to stealthily open the door. Okay. Sorry. That is a 17. Okay. You open the doors.

You see a small chamber. To the left, a set of double doors. To the back of the room, a spiral staircase descending down. All right, I'll check the doors on this floor. Perception check for traps. Okay. There might be some crude traps here. 26.

26. You do not detect any traps. All right, I'll try to stealthily open the door. 14. 14. You open the door. You see a small room, similar to the latrine in size.

Circular room. And there's a low fence surrounding a rectangular opening in the room's floor. A winch, a frayed rope, and several rusted buckets along with three water jugs sit next to the fence.

It's a well. It's a well. Why, it's a well. So you're standing outside the doors. Lurk will peer, walk up to it, and peer, oh no,

there's a fence surrounding it, right? Mm-hmm. Can I get through the fence? Is there an opening, or a latch, or a... There is, you could just kind of step right over it.

Okay. So I'd of step right over it. Okay. So I'd like to step over it and look down into the well. Okay. Roll a perception check. 16. You step up, and you don't notice that the tiles surrounding the well are weak.

Oh, no. And you weigh over 200 pounds with all your gear. The floor collapses, and you fall. We'll see you next week. Oh, my God! Oh, shit! Mork! Outro music. Thanks for watching!