The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 75 - A Tomb with a View

Episode Date: November 1, 2016

With the help of the dwarves, the heroes have breached the final resting place of Nargrym Steelhand. While in awe of the majesty of sepulcher, they soon discover that not all is what it should be in the tomb of the famed Giantslayer. For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On the 75th episode of the Glass Cannon Podcast. This tomb has been raided. I suspect Angelina Jolie. I hope she... Passing through a door that's been sealed for centuries. In Baron, directly in front of you, is a glass panel on the floor, covered in centuries-old grime. Probing deeper into the darkness. You're able to slide the panel to the side,

revealing a narrow, concealed passage. Oh. Leading down. Oh. The heroes discover a gruesome secret. It seems as if someone has desecrated his tomb. I believe his evil was allowed to escape. This will not go unpunished.

And awaken the evil within. They're dying. They're dying right in front of us. Baron, what are you doing? Oh, no. Boom, you shut the door. So we're going to like, right down real quick. I'm going to tell a kind of like fallen man. Let's get killed. Let's get killed.

Is near death death the adventure continues now Welcome back, Glass Cannonites. Troy LaVallee here. I can't believe I'm saying this, but it's episode 75! This is insane to me. How the hell have we done 75 of these? Nonetheless, here we are, and what an episode we have coming up for you, as the tomb of Nargrim Steelhand has now been opened after centuries of being sealed. What secrets or dangers lie within?

Well, you'll find out soon enough. But we mentioned it as a little tease to the end of last week's cannon fodder, but coming this weekend, Skid, Joe, Grant, Matthew, and myself are heading to Cape Cod for the whole weekend for a little GCP retreat, and we're taking you with us. Well, not literally, but kind of. We are going to spend the whole weekend gaming and geeking out like losers. We're going to try and record a couple episodes while we're out there, and what I think you'll We'll see you next time. can happen. We will definitely be recording, but before you ask, no, we will not be recording a live episode. That's just not how our show works. I'm way too much of a control freak to degrade the quality of the show

with raw, unedited content. It wouldn't be good, trust me. However, we're going to do some Facebook Live. We're going to do some Twitch. We're going to give away a bunch of Pathfinder stuff and you'll be able to talk to us and ask us about all of our dark secrets, which you just know Matthew has a ton of.

So stay tuned, because late Friday night, November 4th, until the afternoon of Monday, November 7th, we will all be locked away together doing what we do best, pretending we're something we're not. Let us know on social media or email what you'd like for us to do that weekend, and maybe, just maybe, I'll say yes. 75 is a pretty big number, so here she is in all her glory. Episode 75, A Tomb with a View. Ladies, gentlemen, Grant. I welcome you to episode 75.

75! Oh, baby! Oh, Lordy! We did it! Lordy Lou. They told us we couldn't do it, but we did! Do you know how many podcasts make it to 75 episodes? None of them ever have.

I think we're the first. First ever. I'm pretty sure it's the Centrum Silver episode. You really need to worry about osteoporosis at this age. Oh, yeah. Bone density definitely goes down. When you say they didn't say we could do it, you're referring to our wives and girlfriends, right?

Yes. Yes. Okay, just to be clear. And all you listeners. Y'all said we couldn't do it. Well, here we are, damn it. How do you feel now? Oh.

All that hate mail we got early on you'll never see 75 see I can't if all of our hate mail is snidely whiplash you might get to 70 72 perhaps

74 75's a dream I tell ya oh my god and what an episode to you know go into 75's a dream, I tell ya! Oh my god. And what an episode to, you know, go into a tomb of a famed giant killer. It just worked out perfectly. Let's talk about this. I mean, the last big episode we had in terms of just numbers was episode 50.

The fall of Gormley. the fall of Ben Vereen. I always pictured Ben Vereen exploding when he hit the ground. I think you said it. I think you said it when he did. That didn't really become canon, but that's how I pictured it, just blah. All right. But it was like soft malts. I don't know if it was Gormley's first.

So Gormley's head popped off, and you just blah, blah, blah. This might be getting too far ahead of ourselves, but how do you plan on murdering Lexington this episode? I don't know. So many options. I have to say, you do possess an unnatural hatred for Joe's animal companions. Oh man. And this Lexington is at the top of

my headless. What has he ever done to you? Fucking magical wolf. I can't tell you in looking for sound bites from the episodes how many times I've come across you going like, fuck that wolverine or I'm going to kill your fucking bear. Well, it's an easy kill. Like you come to love those things, but I'd rather kill that than one of you guys. But let's look back. Let's look back and think about.

You hear that, PETA? They said we'd never make it to 75, those PETAs. Episode 50 was our last big numerical episode, our seminal episode, the fall of Gormley, the fall of Benverine. Iwiga was still a helpful, not-so-helpful companion. Yep.

And now here we are at 75 25 short episodes later 25 short episodes later and only one member of the party is still the same Mr. Baron Jones Baron Berenson

Baron John Doe I think is the yeah Baron Doe you have Ingrahild who was with the party but did not enter the vault of thorns you now have the mysterious umlo with you um the cook the cook umlo the cook with his mithril skillet and you have if that would be to have a mithril cookware now that is not min maxmaxing. Talk about privilege. Dwarves take great pride in all of their instruments. Better be non-stick.

Episode four. That's terrible. That's just a property of Mithril. I would assume, yeah. It's like a ceramic skillet, just non-stick naturally. Right. It's Teflon. Episode 51, you meet one Delanarn.

And she is with the party. Nestor Coyne, a evil-aligned slayer. Coyne by name, Coyne by nature, as my old dad used to say. As his old dad used to say. And of course, Sir Willemette Keswick. And his trusty steed, Lexington. One, two, three, four, five, six characters in a wolf. I mean, did you guys think that it would ever come to this?

The party makeup is so different now. I mean, you used to be witch, gunslinger, ranger. Cleric. Cleric. Thank you. And now you are slayer, magus, magus bard, uh, gunslinger, cavalier paladin, or paladin cavalier. I mean, you've seen the damage that you've done in the last two episodes. I couldn't, anything I threw at you, you guys just boop, boop, at you, you guys just took out. Are you feeling overconfident now because of this party makeup? I was worried

that you were getting frustrated because it's like, oh, you're killing all my monsters before. I think that we all have to keep in mind, especially you, Troy, that this is a different party makeup now and we're going to be dealing a lot more

damage than we were before. So I don't think you have to worry. It's like, oh, I've got to balance it to make it like it was before. It's not going to be like it was before. For sure. And look what you've faced. You've faced spiders. You've faced a caster. You've faced spiders. You've faced a caster. You've faced animals that can do serious poison damage and whatnot, but you've got two of you fighting from range, one of you fighting atop a wolf,

and one of you who just automatically quits and kills anything she touches with her 17 attacks and spells. I was talking to Skip before. If you think about the classic party makeup, where you have like frontline fighter rogue caster healer we've we've kind of taken those roles and broke them up into small sub roles and then just weirdly distributed them about the you know throughout the party so you've got your frontline fighter in who is also who's kind of della and sir will who's also a healer. And Della's also the caster. Right.

And the healer. And the healer. And then you've got... Because you're a bard. You're a rogue who's also your now principal damage dealer. And then you have Baron who's shooting a gun and can automatically hit stuff from range. We've taken everything and just scrambled it around. I would say that the greatest weakness for the party, and we'll see if this comes to bear, is having a true caster. Yeah, there's no real high power magic.

There's no blaster, you know, battlefield control type caster. Oh, we can deal a lot of physical damage. Right. But that's about it. Nobody has a spell over level two right now. That won't rear its head as much. I mean, casters come to their own

around like level 10, 11, really, when they start to really separate from the party. And really i'm in a campaign now with skid where we have level 14 characters approximately and my barbarian who was just a whirling dervish of death is now looking at our summoner and just jaw dropping damage and battlefield effects so what i'm saying is kill one of us and we'll bring back a caster. We'll unbalance it even further. Don't you worry, buddy. It is episode 75, after all.

Well, I'm interested to see. I don't know. Joe can be the first one to attest. I am a stickler for the die. I love the idea of probability controlling things. So I'm going to be interested to see, like, are you guys going to just keep mashing? Or are things going to change?

And how will certain things that have not affected you so far, how will you deal with that? Like, you dealt with poisonous spiders. Great. What's going to happen when 15 giants come running at you? Different ballgame.

Different ballgame. I think, you know, consciously and subconsciously, when we picked new characters, we were trying to think about those giants. Right. And, I mean, so we haven't tested ourselves against that yet. I think as well, as much as Joe talked about how devastated Lork was about not being able to save everyone,

about Gorim abandoning him in this time of need. I think Baron is thinking a change has got to come. And, you know, he's got to change his ways because he let down people, too. He let down, he, as strong as his magical handbanger is, he couldn't save Galabras and Gormley from their fates. Right. And Baron, like, you guys might all feel like, all right, feeling pretty good.

Baron, you've seen enough to know that those last couple battles, that the tide is going to turn. Yeah, I think that Sir Will has pretty much only known victory to this point, you know? Right. And he's never been in real serious, he hasn't been in a real serious combat situation

where a lot of people have died. So he's very optimistic, you know, about his goddess being on his side and what is, you know, the future is bright ahead of him. He's on the side of right and the side of right always prevails. He hasn't really been taken off that pedestal yet. The hardest battles we ever had, in my opinion, are the ones where intelligent NPCs are driven by rage and anger.

And that is Screed and Melira. They had the most devious web-snaring plots and plans for us to fall into, and the same with Awiga. Fortunately for us, Grenseldeck was so depressed and sad that she really wasn't as effective as she would have been probably.

So what I'm worried is a guy, potentially potentially who's been buried alive for 700 years, furious at us coming in and just, you know, we killed his mother. Yeah. Wow. Lockmore Ettergun. And he's got to be insane. Or if not his mother, maybe a descendant or something. Right.

Yeah, because the bodies have not been here for 700 years. That's what was confusing from last week. So maybe that other thing was some sort of descendant. Also, your most dangerous episodes tend to be multiples of 25. That cannot be overlooked. It's just like the Giants with even year World Series. Exactly. That's exactly what it's like. Giants Slayer. Oh boy. Loyalty, duty, strength. And the sort of circular door connected to the tomb,

opens up into darkness. Siren's game, that's everything! That's awesome, that's great. And you see, those of you with dark vision see a room ahead of you. Maybe it's 30 feet long, about the same amount wide. Tightly spaced pillars that line the walls of this wide chamber gracefully suspend a vaulted ceiling.

Walls, ceiling, and pillars alike have been cut from the surrounding stone. Centuries of dust coat every surface, and the air is stale. A large translucent panel is set in the center of the floor. On either side, a stone door sits inside a low arch. stone door sits inside a low arch. Whoa. And it is

darkness in Pathfinder terms. Who has dark vision in the group? Della does. Baron. Della and Baron. Sir Willamette does not. Sir Willamette and Nestor Coyne. Humans. Well, a human and a halfling.

No dark vision. You have low lightvision. Turtle power. Nope. Nothing. Can't see shit. Okay. I got the three dwarves standing up front. So they can all see. They can all see. Ingrahild and Umlo. Wide-eyed. Didn't we have some sort of

light source? I, uh, Della, lit your bow on fire. Oh, that's right, yeah. Sorry, lit it on fire. Oh, wait, no, I need that. Can't be trusted. I need that. How long does that last?

I think it'll last 10 minutes per caster level, so it's going to last a while. And that'll give around the area where Nestor is a 20-foot aura of dim light, or a 24-foot aura of normal light. And then another 20 feet of dim light. Think of Diablo 2 listeners. Yeah. Diablo 2 listeners?

Think of the Diablo 2 listeners. Please give now. These poor people can only listen to a visual game. What do you guys, Gal and Wolf, do? Well, so Nestor's sort of standing in the back, and he's got his bow, and he's just not. He's got it ready, like he's got an arrow knocked and drawn. And he's like, be my guest.

I'm low and ingri-hilled. Look to Baron and say, we're going in. If you'll have me, I'll walk side by side with you. And we walk forward to inspect this room. The threeves the two nargrimikins and the one parentless former redheart motherless baron step into the room the dwarves umlo and ingrahill fan out around this translucent panel and bar Baron directly in front of you is a 15 foot by 20 foot like glass

panel on the floor covered in centuries old grime yellow from age and dust I take my pants off a kerchief out of my duster I take a kerchief

out of my duster and I gently wipe away as if an archaeologist was approaching a dig site to see if there's anything underneath the dust dust is starting to move but you feel like you need a little more elbow grease to get some of that grime off okay

I do a quick check around, thinking back to our journey through the woods of traps. I just do a quick perception check to see if I see any obvious wires or anything that could trap this area. Sure. 29. You don't see anything. What does it smell like?

I'm sorry, 30, but that's fine. Stale. Just musty, stale. Yeah, like a... Sealed tomb. You know, like a... You ever have that... Go down to your cellar,

and you haven't been down there in a while, and it's got that, like, celery, musty, moldy smell. Mildewy. I say... There's not a lot of fresh air coming in here. I say in Jorvish to Umlo and Ingrahild, we are here with the Nargrimkins.

We come with respect and all due deference to Steelhand. And I invite them to help me clean off this clear glass plate with whatever they have. And they oblige. They pull out, you know, they use their clothing or whatever, and they just start rubbing, and you guys begin rubbing away. I mean, it's a pretty large surface, so you're just getting sort of, you know, tiny circles that you can look in, and eventually you can see below into another room.

Sheriff, may I risk a little light? Let me just take a quick peek. I think that any type of reconnaissance mission deserves a little bit of reticence around using light. So just one moment, but I would love your help. At your command, but know that I cannot see. Absolutely, I understand. Let me just take a quick peek. And also imagine Nestor, the light from off of his bow is sort of spilling out into the room,

but it's just lighting like where Baron's standing and a little bit around it, and then it's dim below, so you can't really see too much. I can't see through it? Okay. So I say, to Nargrim Steelhand, I say, I am inviting a righteous warrior of Yomadai into your midst to help us through this tomb. So, uh, Sir,

Will starts to like slowly trot Lexington into this dark room. And he's like saying prayers under it, under his breath, like Yomadai, please protect me. And, uh, he's going to,

in his main hand, he's going to light a torch and just like hold it aloft, trot up to the edge of the glass, and then hold it out over the glass. Baron, roll a perception check. 29. 29. Atta boy. I'm just going to point out that that's my die, Grant is using. Yes, thank you, Matthew.

And it never rolls that well for me. Time to trade die. The glass looks to be about five inches thick. You feel like it could support your weight. As you've cleaned it off, and Umlo and Ingerhild have helped, you've got a wide enough spot to sort of look below, you see a sarcophagus. Whoa.

Creepy. That has been opened with its lid pushed to the side. Whoa. This offers a glimpse of its occupant. That's good. That's good. I'm scared. Just like Diablo 2.

I can't see it. You get a peek into what's in there. A crumpled corpse dressed in a suit of scale mail armor. While the view is centered on what must be Nargrim's sarcophagus,

your keen eyesight in peering into the room also sees, sort of north of the sarcophagus in a little alcove, a large, broken cage. Hmm. Ha. Ha. broken cage. Hmm.

Huh. I am immediately suspicious because in our last episode I believe you told me that Nargrim Steelhand wore a suit of mail made from the nails of giants that he had slayed. Correct?

So just seeing scale mail there makes me think, is this the body? Is this a ceremonial dwarven ritual? Now, mind you, too, that it is. You're doing the best you can. Right. As far as you know, that's scale mail.

Five inches thick glass is hard to see through. So I turn towards Della, who seems to be the person that knows the most about planes, and I turn to Willamette, Sir Willamette, and I say, there was a cage in there. Now, I don't know much about the past, but if you know anything about, in your history books that you've seen about dwarven burials or what might be down there, it might be a good time for you to check that out. Well, this, if you ask me, I believe that they must have caged this Eddogan in there with him.

Oh, yes. And if the cage is broken, then I believe his evil was allowed to escape. And I'm going to cast Detect Evil. It's a 60-foot cone. Nestor's behind me. No jokes. Let's just look for evil.

I just want to kind of scan the area within 60 feet. So that's through the walls as well. Right. And if there's anything it would give off a faint glow. So it's probably all the way to the floor or at least the sarcophagus is 50 feet down. Oh wow. It's a pretty

high. So it's not just under the glass. Sepulcher. Sepulcher. Sepulcher. Sepulcher. Sayulcher. Sepulcher. Sepulcher. Down there. Say that five times fast. Say it five times fast, five times fast. I know.

But you do not detect any evil. I feel he has escaped from this place. He may be deeper within the vaults. I say we keep on going. But I'd like to look around the edges for any other runic inscriptions or secret doors. All right, Willam, it'll start sort of trotting around the edge

of, around the glass, around the perimeter, just holding the torch aloft, looking at the walls. You know, seeing if there's any etchings, any markings, anything on the doors that indicates what they might lead to. No, there's two doors, like I said, one to the north, one to the south. They are in archways, and the room seems pretty unadorned

except for the pillars that are creating this vaulted ceiling. So it's just a viewing chamber. And there's nothing written on the ceiling itself? No. Okay. No, it's pretty, you know, when you came in, there was runes all around the circle, but this seems to be maybe purposefully unadorned

because it's all about what you're looking at below. I say, Ingrahild Umlo, do we go left or do we go right? I defer to your judgment as a survivalist as a tracker i will roll a survival check 26 this is incredible that's awesome 26 matthew is so upset you can never return that i don't I don't think I've ever rolled this well on any die, let alone that one Oh my god You don't see any tracks

Is there anything Sort of a crapshoot Is there anything that, if Della were to approach and look down to the tomb, is there any indication of where a door is or like, we could do a knowledge of engineering to suggest how to get down there You can't from whaton was able to see he can only see sort of straight above but the room seems to go it's big bigger you know larger to the east but you can't oh so this is just a

viewing chamber into what looks to be a larger room it's not just a pit in the middle it's like okay it's like grant's tomb, but with glass over it. This is making sense. Yeah. This is cool. Very cool. We're up 116th Street in Manhattan. That is a beautiful tomb.

As far as tombs go. My dad named me after him, and I went there with my dad, and it was really weird to see the tomb of the person I was named after. That's always weird, yeah. Do you remember the famous trivia question, who's buried in Grant's tomb? Oh, you guys know the answer grant grant and his wife and grant and grant grant and grant grant and grant grant burger not this grant not that grant all right um maybe we'll be about the end of 75 so the survival you have anything to say about it

the survival check gives me no information whatsoever. No information. I turn to... Ingrihold has begun walking to the north. Baron. Inspecting the door. Sorry. Sheriff, what do your instincts tell you?

We go where you lead. My instincts say to go right. I always like the path of right. Right. Righteousness. Della turns to Nestor and says, Shall we? Well, they seem to know what they're doing, don't they?

They're so decisive, aren't they? There appears to be more board space to draw on the right side. That's a good point, yeah. I went that way. Knowledge map drawing. Please don't take that. Knowledge metagaming. Nestor is going to go to the door on the right and check for traps.

Della will follow. 22. Doesn't appear to be trapped. Or locked, for that matter. I say a prayer to Torag and Dwarvish, asking for forgiveness for letting a cold-blooded

killer, not someone who kills with any type of might or right, the path of right on their side into this holy place. I'm standing right here, mate. You know Dwarvish? Let me see your character sheet. I thought my name.

Okay, so Nestor walked up, did not appear to be trapped, did not appear to be locked. Baron, you stand in front of the southern door. What do you do? I will open it. I'll get a little WD-40 down here and take a look at those. Baron, you open the door,

and you are just smacked in the face with stink, nauseating stench, filling this chamber, just immediately comes into the viewing chamber room where you're standing. You see a bunch of broken stuff laying about the room. With your darkvision, you can see all the way to the other end of the wall. It just looks like broken furniture, all sloppily piled into strange arrangements

all throughout the room. Among the pile of wreckage, there's like toppled statuettes of jade and serpentine, shards of clay and porcelain urns, and several crushed drinking steins, which you would obviously notice. That was pointed. Not you, Grant. Hugh Farron. Hugh, you drunk. Grant, you have a real problem.

It smells like BO and shit. I take the curtain. I thought that this whole podcast is an elaborate intervention for Grant. It took 75 episodes to work up to it. I suppose you're wondering why we called you here, Grant. You can leave anytime you want.

Anytime you want to go, Grant. But do you mind if we just tell you how we feel? We all love you. We all love you. Matthew has a letter he'd like to read to you. I'm working very hard on this. I prepared some background music on Syrinscape. Dear Grant, I miss our early times.

You guys remember when we restarted that recording because i got angry that joe got a hero point that i deserved and that's what i would do if you actually did that i'd flip this table over i'd run out of the bottle cap the uh the bottle cap for the after right before skid got impregnated by the... What's it called? The Griff. The Griff, yeah. Classic. So, throwback, 75, so nostalgic. This is like a clip episode. Yeah.

Like, we're too tired to do an episode. We're too tired to do an actual episode. We're just gonna, yeah. Baron covers his nose and mouth with the kerchief he was previously using. He whips it in the air very quickly to get the dust that was in it out. And he holds it with his left hand, his non-dominant hand, and he

keeps his gun drawn as he kind of sidles his way into the room, looking above and around for anything. And he says to the group, we're not the first visitors to this tomb. And you walk in. Yes.

So Baron covers his mouth. Smart. You've dealt with nauseating things before. You've dealt with airborne shit. You walk in, gun drawn, looking up, looking all around, but not looking down. Two bolts fire directly at him. but not looking down. Cha-ching!

Vroom, vroom! Two bolts fire directly at you. Uh, 22 to hit. Hit. Roll a fortitude save. Burn! Is it a poison? It is.

Okay. Okay. 20. Grant. 12 points of damage, and you are not poisoned. I'll listen to this one. Trap sprung. Oh, nice. Courtesy of Siren's Gate.

Double crossbow trap. The bolts hit you, 12 points of damage, but you hearty dwarf that you are fight off whatever sort of poison was about to mess you up from the inside. I say, Nestor, I could use your particular set of skills now.

I think I've sprung another trap, but it's nothing but a little scratch. Right, yeah. Well, alright, yeah. I'll take a look. This is my field of professional expertise. Oh, that's fine. No, no. Don't say anything.

No. Come on, rest of the group. No, roll to 16. It's all well. You look down. Obviously, now, if you pull the bolt out of you, you can look down and see there was a trip wire there on the first square. Oh, yeah.

You can roll a perception. I would like to actually take my duster off, and I'm going to whip the dust in this room, if there is any, that way to see if it will unveil anything or aid in my perception check. Okay, so you take the duster off, and you see that Baron doesn't... He skipped chest day. Yep. I'm all legs. All legs. He's all legs.

And, I mean, it's smelly now. Umlo and Ingrid are kind of stepping back away from the door. The smell is so bad. But it looks like there's only that one tripwire in front of you. My perception check, I'll just... That's a 25. 25. Yeah, you can see with your dark vision the whole rest of the room.

There's too much stuff broken around the room for there to be another tripwire. I ask Umlo and Ingerhild to help me rummage through the items that are here to see if there's anything of importance to Mr. Steelhand himself. Of course. It seems as if someone has desecrated his tomb by destroying all of his funerary

gifts. This will not go unpunished. And Umlo and Ingerhild carefully walk into the room, stepping over the tripwire. Sir Will will trot in as well, once the dwarves are in. Della will join as well.

And Umlo's like, rats. Look at this. There are half-eaten rat carcasses all over the room. And other vermin. Skeletons. This human waste. What is this? What happened here? Seems as if someone destroyed this in a fit of rage. It was Edegun, I'm bound to believe. He couldn't get out.

He was starving. He was reduced to eating rats. Filthy, filthy creatures. This is a great dishonor to our ancestor. I'd like to... We need to move, I know, but I also turn to Willamette and I say, Please, Sir Will, I'm not a man of the cloth as you may be. Could you please say a quick word of prayer for this room?

I will do what I can. And he says a prayer to Iomadi to desecrate. Fuck Toregg! We're friends! Wait, wait, wait. They're friends. Cut the mic, cut the mic. Yeah, so he'll offer to help if they want to take any if there's any particular holy symbols or anything like that they want to get out of the muck.

He'll help kind of root through and do that kind of stuff, but he's not really gonna I don't think we're gonna put anything back together, but at least clean a little bit. Yeah. Did you say skeletons? Like skeletal carcasses of little rats. Another vermin. Beware

of shadow rats. I've heard of them inhabiting tombs, and I know the evil god Troy likes to sick them on people. Their CR is much too low for these type of encounters. They would still do a number on us.

They'd still die. They don't have channeling. Are you guys all in the room now? Yeah. Sir Willamette on Lexington. So there's only one door on the eastern side of the room. Nestor, if you're along sort of the western wall,

you see there's cracks and holes in the wall. Maybe it's worn over time. Maybe it's been done by someone. Not enough that any, like, person could fit through, but certainly rats and other insects. So whatever or whoever was here could sustain off of that stuff. All right. Well, first thing I'm going to do is I'm going to disable the trap. I'm going to fuck up the trap. Okay. Even though it's spent, it's ammo.

And I'm going to just do a quick perception check. 17 and 20 for traps. So you look at the wall, you're looking at these holes, you don't detect any traps. Okay. And I'm gonna make my way over to the door, too, and check it for traps. Okay. Uh, 26.

26. It appears to be untrapped. And unlocked. So, uh, Sir Willamette wants to, he's going to trot along the south wall with the torch up, and he's just going to just sort of graze his offhand along the wall as he walks

and see if he can detect any sort of seams or lines that would indicate a hidden door or something of that nature. Fifteen. Fifteen. You do not detect a hidden door or anything. You just see the double crossbow sort of set in the southern wall.

Ignore what I said before about what Nestor was doing. It's set right there. Got it. Baron will open the next door. Baron sidles up to the next door, and you see a hallway that ends about 25 feet into nothingness. Into another wall. I ask again for Nestor's kind assistance. Before I do that, I'm going to

just quick scan over everything in the room to see if there's anything valuable. 27. 27. Good roll. It is surprisingly empty of valuables. Everything that is here has been destroyed, but if this was some sort of reliquary,

there should be valuables here, and there are none. It's been looted. This tomb has been raided. I suspect Angelina Jolie. I hope she gets full custody. Fuck Bradford. Team Angelina.

Willamette will trot up to the doorway and offer a little extra light to Nestor to check the hall for traps. I'm going to check the hall for traps. I love this image of holding out the torch. 28. All the shadows it casts. 28. So Willamette and Nestor, this unlikely duo,

Willamette stands at the door allowing Nestor... Could you hold that light a bit higher? Oh, sorry. And it's enough for you to see dimly that it ends and, Nestor, you do not detect any traps in this hallway. You see that 25 feet it turns.

Turn back and say, looks clear to me. Alright. We can keep letting Nestor lead or, you know, the dwarves can go first because it's whatever you guys want. I suggest you go first, Sheriff. You can see in the dark

and we won't have to light our way so brightly. Perfect. We'll be right behind you. And I wave Ingerhild and Umlo up. So you let the dwarves go first and we'll back them up. All right, so Baron, Umlo, Ingerhild, walk down to the end and the hallway turns and ends at another door uh i don't want

don't you love dungeons yeah i love it i love drawing them there's just like oh i am nervous i put my ear up to the door and i do a perception check to see if i can hear anything on the other side. Sure. 17. 17. Silence. Not even the wind. I almost want to take my potion of cure light wounds before I go in. That's right, because you guys are, I mean,

you guys didn't get hit that hard in that last two battles, right? Yeah, but I'm down a few. I'm down a couple. My strength is still damaged. Oh, right. Oh, man. And Baron's down down a couple. My strength is still damaged. Oh, right. And Baron's down one dex. Yes, I still am. Which still has me at 18. Nestor, how much strength did you lose?

Two. Two. Della, 100 hit points. Totally healed. Della got hit in both combats. The player inside of me wants to turn and ask for a channel, but's right. The player inside of me wants to turn and ask for a channel, but the daring gunslinger

inside of Baron opens the door. Okay. What do I see? Baron opens the door and sees the following. Another room that is so 20 feet wide,

25 feet long, and off in the northwest portion, you see another hallway continuing. Maybe it leads around in a circle to that first viewing room you were in. Maybe it leads deeper into the tomb. There are four statues of idealized dwarves standing against the walls of this chamber next to stone fonts. A dusty film covers the fonts, and their basins, Baron can see, obviously,

from that vantage point, are inscribed with dwarven runes. On the eastern wall, there's a massive stone panel bearing a bas-relief likeness of a dwarven warrior garbed in a suit of scale mail and wielding an oversized barbed spear. That's on this side of the room? Yes. No, eastern portion.

Correct, right. So there's four statues, two on the western wall, two on the eastern wall. Between the two statues on the eastern wall is this huge bas-relief of a giant, excuse me, of a dwarf, scale male, large barbed spear. Oversized barbed spear. Just remember that Troy orients all the maps to himself and not the players. Correct. The carved figure on the wall is completely unadorned.

As far as you can see. I mean, you're not... I never said that. You're not in the room yet. So I step to the edge of the room. And if there's nothing along this wall of value... And I'm pointing towards the southern wall? Northern wall.

On the northern wall. Great. So if there's nothing on the northern wall of value... No, it's completely empty. I pull the dwarven war axe off my back and I fling it across the room

into the wall. It just hits and hits the floor. Now I take a quick look up, down, left, right into this room for traps. Roll perception. 20. You see no traps. I walk into the

room. Cha-chink! No, I'm kidding. Baron walks into the room. Umlo and In! No, I'm kidding. Baron walks into the room. Umlo and Ingrahild very quickly follow. And can we read the runic inscriptions? Absolutely. What do they say?

Rubbing the dust off of these statues. Each of you grab a statue and just start rubbing the dust off the fonts to be able to read these runes. Regular old dwarf party. Roll a knowledge religion. I cannot do that. Right. Unless you say it's so Torag-y that I would know.

Ingrahild and Delican. And Soken will, I imagine, right? Yeah, I'm not in that room. I'm not either. If you want to call me in, I'll do it. I can't see anything. Right. So you see likenesses of four dwarves.

One you know is Torak the other three you're not sure they're probably his children right but they seem to be of the same age oh okay so I say light up your torches boys come on in

and girl Della will roll knowledge for legend as well Willamette and Lexington will walk in. Della doesn't know. Neither does Willamette. Is it Ingerhild? No, Ingerhild doesn't as well. So you see Torag and three other statues.

One is a woman and two are men. And they seem to be of the same age of this statue of Torek. Similar age. Do they look fat, skinny? Do their faces look like anything in particular? Are they adorned with any armor, weapons? Is there any more flavor text? Nope, just the runes.

There's dwarven blessings on each one. And they're just standard blessings, like keep this house, whatever. Okay, so I go around, and I look all the way around the back. If I can maneuver there, I look all the way around each four of them, and I'm looking for secrets and intrigue and anything fun.

Okay. Roll a stone cutting, because they're all made of stone. And I'm looking for secrets and intrigue and anything fun. Okay. Roll a stone cutting, because they're all made of stone. 24. 24. So you look at the two on the western wall. Mm-hmm. And don't see anything of interest.

You then go to the eastern wall, and that's where the statue of Torag is, and that's where the bas-relief is. You also don't see anything of particular interest on the statues, other than recognizing one as the father of creation. But you do see on the bas-relief, now that you're closer, two things. One, the carved figure of this dwarven warrior is completely unadorned with the exception

of its right hand, which is leaded in silver. Oh. You'd think steel would be more appropriate. It's like a bowerleaf, the way it's carved. There's nothing special on it, but it's silver embossed on its right hand.

Well, silver's more valuable, so it might be a ceremonial, you know. So he's naked? No, he's wearing scale mail. Oh, okay. He's totally unadorned. Well, unadorned in the sense that, like, the wall... Nothing fancy.

This has been carved. The wall is completely, there's not, like... He's just nude. He's nude. Except for a covered hand. He has a large, bobbed penis. And his other finger is to his lips to say like, Oh, look at me!

I'm the Venus de Milo! He appears to be stepping out of a shower. But the wall doesn't have any rubies or gems or anything encrusted into it. It's like a candid shot of the... He's like, wait, wait, wait! No, no, don't carve me now!

I put on my armor! There he is in all his glory. Trust me, it'll be better with the armor. Trust me. Don't carve me now is one of my favorites. So I attempt... Yeah, the hand is silver. But you notice two things, I said.

With a 24 stone cutting perception check, you also notice a small gap between the stone panel and the wall. I attempt to see if I can maneuver that gap wider and then I also, if I cannot, I will attempt to depress

the silver adorned hand. You touch the hand and just feel silver. You know, you could chip away at it if you wanted to be a grave robber. Sell it on the black market or the silver market. That would be appropriate.

And then you stick your hand into the panel and with a little help from Umlo and Ingrahild, you're able to slide the panel to the side, revealing a narrow,

concealed passage leading down. Oh! Boys, I think this is how we might have escaped. Oh, that is so cool. Oh, that's good. That's good, Joe! I say, do you want to

see any more on this level, or should we go down and try to have the element of surprise on our hands if anything's down there? I always say, take the secret door. They'll never see it coming. It's the phrase of my house. The words of my house. Always take the secret door.

This is so cool. Let's take the secret door. Let's get this going. We say it at weddings and funerals. He died as he lived, taking the secret door. That's his tradition. So, yeah, you see a staircase leading down, and the 20, 25 feet it turns.

I go down. I'm mindful of any wire traps or such similar thing. That seems to be the modus operandi of whoever is setting the traps in this campaign. Right. You have one example with which to use that. Also in the forest.

Correct. Yeah, more than one. You're wrong. I win. Bottle cap. I think that's a definite bottle cap. Yeah, come on, man. So you go down. Yes. I win. Bottle cap. I think that's a definite bottle cap. Yeah, come on, man. So you go down. Yes. Baron enters. I'm low on Ingrahilt.

And I'm checking whenever I can. Fast at their heels. Roll a perception. 22. 22. You do not see any traps. You do not see any runes. When I reach the base of the stairs where it turns, do I see anything else?

You see a door. At the end of a tiny, five, ten foot long hallway. I just see if there's anything obviously unusual with it. With a 20. Looks totally normal. I open it. More wire traps. You were right,

bottle cap. I wish that's how it happened. You open the door and see the room that is indeed the viewing chamber. Ooh. This is amazing.

I wish you guys could see this map that Troy obviously spent several hours drawing. Dungeon maps are pretty, I like dungeon maps because they're usually pretty boxy. You know, it's like X amount of feet by X amount of feet. Not a lot of curves. Open spaces of running water and so it's tough to draw. And I only have one blue

Expo marker because I refuse to invest in any more. All my maps are blue. They could sponsor us. Come on Expo, that's Expo markers. You're drawing maps for your friends. Want to get high? Want to get high and draw maps for your adult friends? That's Expo.

So it's a good thing the dwarves are up front because your dark vision allows you to see relatively everything in this room. Do you step in, Baron? I step in. Baron steps in. Umlo and Ingrahild flank Baron on either side because they, wide-eyed as usual,

knowing that they are in the tomb of their ancestor, Nargrim Steelhand. I am in absolute awe, but I know that I have been told that I am representing Torag's son, who was the strength. So I am trying to hold it back and keep a steel-eyed look on my face as I enter into this room, and I ask Umlo and Ingerhild if we should approach. We should, but first,

let the DM explain what the room looks like. Ingriheld's like, yes, it's a great idea. On either side of the room are two wide alcoves flanking the eastern portion of the room, flanking where you're standing. The floor in front of you is inlaid with the symbol of an ornate warhammer. Classic Torag. Each alcove,

to the right and left of the dwarves on the far ends of this room, contain a large iron brazier crammed with baubles, trinkets, a bunch of stuff just crammed in thereubles, trinkets, bunch of stuff just crammed in there. Doesn't look like that's how it was originally put when Steelhand was laid to rest. Beyond the alcoves, so moving forward into the room,

visually, the chamber begins to narrow and a flight of wide steps climb to a vaulted recess in the back. Vaulted, obviously, because the ceiling had the viewing chamber. A great stone sarcophagus, its lid pushed to one side, lies in this space beneath the translucent panel in the ceiling above. A smaller alcove stands on either side of the stone coffin.

One, you know, has a broken cage in it. The other can't quite see. And on the back wall, beyond the sarcophagus is one of the most beautiful works of dwarven artistic craftsmanship you've ever set your eyes on, Baron. And as a man who spent a good couple weeks carving a beautiful

triptych mural on the chelish devil you realize how great dwarven artisans can be. You see in all of his glory Nargrim Steelhand with his silver hand holding the same

oversized, large, barbed spear fighting a giant surrounded by his kinsmen. Each dwarf unique in their appearance. Where's Judas? Where's Judas? I'm looking for Judas in the Last Supper picture. He's reaching for the bread.

Larkmore. That is what you see. I say in Dwarvis truly Nargrim was one of the brightest That is what you see. I say, Endorvis, truly Nargrim was one of the brightest sparks to ever spout from the forge of Torag. It is a shame what has happened.

We must consecrate this place. And I ask them to approach with me. Our centuries, our ancestors, nay, all dwarves have heard of this tomb and now now we set our eyes upon it our kinsmen they both take a knee and begin silently praying

they stand up look at Baron and nod. And the three dwarves walk forward into the room, up the steps, and look into the sarcophagus. Although the skeletal corpse, the remains, still wears armor, you see that its right arm ends in a stump, and Nargrim's legendary steel hand is nowhere to be seen. Oh my god.

His skull has been crushed completely, and parts of what clearly had to have been his beard hacked off, not unlike when you saw Umlo. Incredible dishonor. His steel helm, legendary steel helm, shattered to pieces beneath his shattered skull. To your right, you see a broken cage and a long rug rolled up that seems to be bulging with objects. To your left, in the other alcove, is an elaborate candelabra

covered with drippings of dried purple and red wax. Each holds probably a dozen melted candle stubs. That is what you see. What's going on with Della, Nestor, and Willamette? Sir Willamette is, once the dwarves ascended the stairs, he is very suspicious of this traitorous ancestor. And he is going to kind of do a, a three 60 and cast detect evil on the area. And he's eyeing up these like back alcoves and the door we came in.

So he's basically, he feels like if something came out up there, the dwarves could handle themselves, but he's going to watch their back. So he's sort of looking where we came from and in the back alcoves for any sort of evil presence besides Nestor. Feeling around,

detecting evil. I mean, you got to think at this point how deep below the surface you are. You guys came down that shaft was 120 feet and then you've gone down another 50 feet. You probably feel the weight of the earth above you. Surrounded by stone. Complete darkness, except for Nestor's bow.

I have that, and I'm holding a torch. The torch and Nestor's bow. I just see you on the wolf. Yep. Looking around. You do not detect evil. Okay. But I'm just going to keep an eye back there.

Right. You're feeling it. You sense evil, but you don't, in the mechanical sense, detect evil. Okay. You just dissect the presence of evil. Could Della walk over to where all the baubles are? Sure, in these braziers? Yeah, she'll look at the left brazier and just south brazier

and see if there's anything going on. Brazier crane? Yeah, I'll roll perception. 27. So you go to the north east or the south east the south you see

many valuables you detect magic on some boots there's a clay vase on an iron stand sculpted to look like a coiled dragon. Three chunks of azurite, a yellow golden topaz, and a small leather embossed casket which has a ton of coins inside of it.

That's what you see to the southernmost alcove. Della is, having had the conversation with Baron about this, is worried about touching any of the, or taking or touching any of the objects, but she does make a note to tell the dwarves about it. Right. Well, Indiana Jones stuff going on here. No, I'm not going to switch out the sandbag thing. Right.

I just want to see if there's anything. And then I detect magic there, and can I walk over and look at the other? Sure. Brazier crane? Well, I was actually going to do that myself. Ah, good. We'll share. Sharing is good.

20 perception. Nestor, you go up there and you see more of what? I don't know if Del, if you were speaking aloud, like this, this, that, and the other thing. Were you? Yeah, she's going to tell the dwarves about it. And you see her visually sifting through that. Nestor, you go up there and you see more stuff.

An abacus with hematite beads. A large drinking horn engraved with entwining oak leaves and silver inlays. An ivory measuring rod with carved numbers that you don't recognize.

An obsidian statuette of a female fire giant. A wooden box containing a set of eight bronze measuring weights carved to resemble squatting goblins. And a sack of coins. I'm going to check for

traps, specifically. 28. Does not appear to be trapped. I start stuffing a sack full of all this stuff. Jesus. Can I roll perception and see if I hear this? Yeah. Or notice? I'm going to do a sleight of hand to see if I can

hide it. 23. 20 on the perception. You'd have to do that on every object. I failed. Willamette failed perception as well. Okay, so and the dwarves are busy looking in the sarcophagus. So Nestor, you're able to get the sack of coins

and like the female fire giant. That kills me because I want to talk about the female fire giant thing. Damn it, Nestor. Nestor's able to get it. That's awesome. You have to do it on every one, so you have to decide. Sleight of hand is per small object. It's a roll, unless you want to let it roll. Sure. Well, I mean, everyone's doing their own thing. I'm saying Nestor's able to get a couple

of the things. Okay. And no one knows anything. Yeah. Classic Nestor. He got the bag of coins. Nestor, what do you see over there? Is there anything in that brazier? Yeah, there's a lot of things here.

Hold on a minute. Let me take a look at it. Let me take a closer look. I'll give you an inventory. Ingerhild is standing. Will is like, take your time. Stella would like to sense motive on Nestor. Sure.

16 bluff. Yeah, fail. Nice. Nicely done, Nestor. Even. 16 bluff. Yeah, fail. Nice. Nicely done, Nestor. Even when he's bad, he's good. Umlo is like, this corpse has been desecrated. Paladin,

can you do a check? Can you look at this body? Something has happened to him. So I'll take that as permission to approach the altar, and I'm going to trot my way up there. And on wolfback, I should be able to see into the coffin, right? I'll be tall enough to see in?

Yeah, absolutely. So I look in, and what are you asking me to roll? Roll a heal check. A heal check. Okay, so I'll place my offhand on the shattered skull. Natural one. Fuck. Sorry, Troy.

We're just going to roll. Just going to roll. Della can do a heel check if you call her over. So, Willamette. I can do it, too. You look and all you see is a crushed skull. You don't even notice the beard. The act of a madman is all I can say.

Baron, you're right there. Let me look. 21. DC 20. You notice some very disturbing things. You notice bite marks on the bones. Yeah. He was starving.

You notice, you know, severe damaging of the bones as well. But most disturbing of all, with a 21 heel check, you are pretty sure all these injuries were made post-mortem, suggesting deliberate desecration of the corpse. Ingrihild says, This is horrible. What is this rug? It seems to be full of baubles. Shall I look inside?

It's your ancestor. Who will help me? Umla says, I will help. And they go over to the rug in the northern alcove and open it up. As they open it up, a bunch of ting, ting, ting, ting, ting, ting falls to the ground. Willamette's holding a torch up over it so he can see everything as it's coming out.

Ting, ting, ting, ting, ting, ting. You see a bunch of stuff fall out, a box among, like a box, a candelabra, a this, a that, you know, a bunch of little things. But also, as they open it up, a this, a that, you know, a bunch of little things. But also, as they open it up, spores start to come out. Oh, God, I hate spores! Yellow spores start filling the room.

They start coughing immediately. Everybody roll a Fortitude save. Oh, fuck. Poison? Yes, indeed. Willamette saved. It's 23 or 25 if it is. Whatever you want. 14 for Della.

Eight. Just to be clear, even those people, because Nestor is really on the far side of the room. He's like 60 feet away. Is that still affecting them? Yeah, it immediately fills the room. They open it up. Ingrahild and Umlo both failed.

An 11 and a 14. It was DC 15. Nestor takes two points of con damage. Della takes three points of con damage. Oh, my God. Ingrahild takes two points. Umlo takes three points. Okay, so you take the con damage

and it's working its way through you. What does Willamette do? Willamette, I'm assuming he's near Umlo and Ingrihild? Yes. He will go to Umlo. He'll go up to Umlo and he'll, you know, he sees obviously that he's affected by something. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm right next to Baron too, right?

But you saved. Okay, so he sees Umlo is affected by something. So he's going to come right up to Umlo and immediately try to do a heal check on him. If I'm not mistaken, you can roll your heal check. If it passes the DC of the poison, then Umlo would get a plus four to his next roll if it's another save on the poison. Okay. I'm going to try to beat the DC of the poison. 18.

18. You beat the DC of the poison. So Umlo would get a plus 4 if he was doing another fortitude save on the poison. So, I'm trying to tell him what to do. Umlo passes the save because of that, but

it's still not cured. It takes two saves to cure it. So, he's got one save. So, can I try it again, you think? Mechanically? Or does it roll over? Yeah, it can roll over. Okay, another plus four.

But I'm going to do Ingerhild now. Ingerhild failed again. Oh, shit. Ingerhild now is down five con. They're dying. They're dying right in front of us. Baron, what do you do? I see Ingerhild go down and see her acting bad,

and I say, Ingerhild, please let me help you.? I see Ingrahild go down and see her acting bad and I say, Ingrahild, please let me help you. And I roll a heal check on her the same way. Okay. That is a 18. 18? That passes.

And she succeeds. So that's one succession for her. One for Umlo. Della, do you want to do a heal check on yourself? Yeah. Okay, go for it. Go for it. And if I want to do a heel check on yourself yeah okay go for it

go for it and if I want to cover my face or something is that can I um it's already in you natural 20

natural 20 now roll a fortitude save you should have used that for the fortitude save oh no no 11 oh

with the plus 4 Della takes one point of con damage extra Nestor do you have the heel skill um I don't okay uh roll a fortitude save fuck Della takes one point of con damage extra. Nestor, do you have the heal skill? I don't. Okay.

Roll a four. It's a save. I will charge over. I mean, if I see them down there, like sort of succumbing to this coughing, whatever, we'll admit, I mean, depends on how many I can do around. If you're saying this is kind of an initiative thing, then. You'll have to wait till the next one.

Nestor, did you get it? 24. All right. So Nestor did you get it 24 all right so Nestor's got one save in the bank Della's got zero saves in the bank Humlo and Ingrihild Lexington

we must help them one save in the bank each everybody roll a perception check ooh 16 20 for Willamette

21 for Della 31 no 22 31 for Baron he is so perceptive everyone except Nestor hears off in the distance k-kink

coming from the hallway and the secret door that you came down. Oh, no. I said I was watching our back. K-kink. Someone close that door. Della.

All right, now, you want to rush to someone? I am going to... You see Della kind of like falling to her knees. No, hearing that noise, I am want to rush to someone? I am going to... You see Della kind of, like, falling to her knees. No, hearing that noise, I am going to rush to the door and try to close the door that we came in. Okay.

Was it a door, or was it a doorway into the... No, it was a door into the room. You took the secret door down the stairs, and then another door into the room. So I'm going to, like, ride down real quick and try to shut the door. Boom, you shut the door. Okay.

Baron, what do you want to do? Do you want to help anybody out? I have actually gotten to a point where I don't know what's happening, but I'm holding Ingrid as if she's a loved one. I'm holding her like, in la pieta, as Mary held Jesus. She's down five con, and she is buckling, and you're just holding her there. Do you want to do another heal check on her? If I can.

Try and give her some help here. 14. 14. Well, I thought you said you were going to roll it over. Are you not going to roll it over? Oh, rolled it. All right, so you did that on Ingrahild, or you did that on Umlo?

Yeah, you did it on Ingrahild. Okay, so now Ingrahild. They should each have a plus four to their second save. Ingrahild makes the second save. So Ingrahild is no longer poisoned, but she's down five con. Umlo, does anybody have the opportunity? I already did it.

Umlo, natural one. So he now... Umlo now resets, because he has to get two consecutive saves. He's down four con. He just got one more con down. Della, you're at the door. Nestor and Della

roll another save. And I'm going to save. You get a plus four. You get a plus four, Della. Can Della chug a potion of lesser restoration? In a moment. Nestor cured.

23. With a 23. Nice. I can see the die from here. Della, what is that? Natural five. Natural five for Della. Della loses two more points of con.

Oh, my God. This could kill. This could kill. Della is near death. Umlo has now reset his fortitude saves and is near death. Ingrahild is okay. Willamette is okay. Baron is okay.

Nestor is okay. is okay. Willamette is okay. Baron is okay. Nestor is okay. Above you, in the viewing chamber, you see the emaciated, living corpse of a dwarf

stamping up and down. Oh, what? He says, Now you will live out your days trapped in the sepulcher of that coward. Just like I did. Just like they did to me. Like I did.

Like they did to me. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Long ago. So many years ago. 700 years. Now you will die. We'll see you next week. Oh no! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Outro Music