The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 8 - The Rat Stuff
Episode Date: July 21, 2015Defying roleplaying game convention, our low-level party combats a stairway full of giant rats! And as they descend into the darkened basement of the Plague House, Barron matches wits with a bear trap... and the crew comes face to face with a truly savage foe! For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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This week on the Glass Cannon Podcast.
You guys descend these stone stairs and they end in a dark subterranean chamber.
The party explores the basement of the plague house and finds they're not alone.
Back up, back up, back up, back up.
They'll need a little luck.
Pat him on the shoulders and say, Good luck, friend.
And then run away.
And a little witch.
I look around Galabras and give it the meanest, cruelest,
most disgusting evil eye look right into its eyes.
And for six rounds, you have a minus two DRAC.
Holy shit. It's like donovan said
the season of the fucking witch the adventure continues now What's up, everybody?
Welcome to Episode 8 of the Glass Cannon Podcast.
Joe here, the alter ego of Lork Iron Tusk, your friendly half-orc ranger
that's getting back into the field after a few too many years behind a desk.
This is a good episode for Lork.
He, well, despite his sore joints and lower back pain,
he gives us a glimpse of his younger days in this show.
Like Skin mentioned last week, the response to the show that we've seen so far
has just been awesome, and we really want to keep it going.
Thanks so much to our listeners that have been spreading the word about the show.
It seems to really be getting out there.
And thanks also to those of you that have given us good feedback on how we can improve and everything.
It's a huge help.
A special shout-out to Russ in Philadelphia, who is not an RPG gamer at all, never played in his life
and spent most of the first episode
quote cross-eyed
trying to figure out what the hell was
going on.
But he powered through and
now he's into it and I think that
he realized something that a lot of us RPG
players sometimes take years to figure
out which is just that rules
can take a backseat to great story.
And so I just I loved hearing that.
If you want to contact the podcast, you should email us at glasscanonpodcast at gmail.com.
You could also follow us on Twitter at at glasscanonpod.
If you're an iTunes subscriber and you haven't already, please jump on there real quick and rate us.
I know it's a pain in the neck, but it's just such a huge help for the show. And if you want some visual aids
to go along with the story, our Tumblr is the place to go. We've got PC art on there,
character sheets, level two character sheets now, maps, NPCs. It's really pretty cool.
Glasscanonpodcast.tumblr.com. And finally, I want to thank Paizo for putting out
such awesome content. The Giant Slayer story is just one of a ton of great stories that they have
on their website that you can download and you can try running one yourself at home. That's paizo.com.
All right. I've been looking forward to this episode for weeks, honestly. I cannot wait for you to see what's in the basement.
Episode 8. Here it is.
Welcome to Episode 8.
Oh, boy. So you guys are done with the plague house right
you want to just go back to true now and call it a day
at this point yes
oh I thought we were under imminent attack
from something
oh that's right
you look ahead of you and three dire rats
are staring at your face
hey you know what
how about everybody rolls initiative
okay
that's one way of stealing.
Just for old time's sake,
we'll roll initiative.
Okay.
Okay, where are my 20 pluses?
24 for Barrett.
Grant rolled his die
and it hit my hand
and it turned into a 19.
Oh, don't we re-roll those?
Die interference.
No.
Okay.
Only if it's a bad roll.
Any other
20 pluses? No.
What'd you get, Gormley? 17.
17? Okay.
And
Galabras? 4.
Classic Galabras.
Old Lork the Orc?
13. That beats a 4
No one's gonna deny that
Okay
It is time for the newly second leveled
Baron to lead the charge
Can I shoot through your square
Or should I step around you
You can shoot through my square
You stick your gun right between his arms.
I didn't really describe it, but yeah, basically three just gross-looking dire rats come running up the stairs.
And we're headed in kind of a straight line, like we're waiting for our lunch.
Right.
You're queued up to fight rats.
Baron is going to pull his pistol out with a bit of panache,
Baron is going to pull his pistol out with a bit of panache,
and he is going to shoot with his up-close-and-deadly class ability.
Oh.
Is he both up-close and deadly?
Fair enough.
We'll see.
What is it, within 30 feet?
I mean, the range of my pistol is only 20 feet,
so everything is up-close-and-deadly, basically.
But I think I missed.
11.
That is a miss.
Bullet goes down the hallway.
I'm sure no one downstairs heard that.
Okay.
That gunshot.
All right, the one up front to the right charges up.
The other one there?
The next one, yeah. That one just moves up one space there
and attacks from an angle to
bite Lork.
Cover.
Okay. Because he's outside of the doorway.
Outside of the doorway, so he gets
a minus.
You get a bonus.
Plus two to his AC.
Yeah, plus two to my...
If you think the rat can see
more than half of me around the corner, get a plus two. If you think the rat can see more than half of me
around the corner, I get plus two.
If he can't see more than half of me,
I get plus four. You get a plus two. And it's totally your call.
Plus two to your AC.
And it's going to try and bite you.
17.
Hit.
Exactly. Right around the corner
that little rat.
Hey, you know what? That's a typical rat move.
You dirty rat.
You dirty rat. You bit my orc.
Alright, one point of damage,
but you know you're going to have to roll a four to two.
Ugh.
This is when I need that bit of luck.
Don't worry, it's not horrible.
Oh, wait, it is.
Ten.
Uh-oh. You, uh, worry it's not horrible oh wait it is uh 10 you uh you feel a little off oh shit oh man that's bad but don't worry now the other one's gonna bite you the one that was standing next to it steps up
and there's no cover it just bites straight straight at Lork. Rolls a 19.
Damn it.
Unadjusted.
And you take four points of damage.
But you are...
Don't need to roll another 42.
Well, wait.
Doesn't it incur an attack?
Yes.
It does.
It does.
Very good. You can't get close to a guy with a Yes. It does. Curse and attack of opportunity. It does. Very good.
Good call.
You can't get close to a guy with a spear.
All right.
Maybe you can kill it, and then you can have those four hit points back.
That would be nice.
A one shot.
I need a little crit action.
Need a little crit here.
We got a level two.
Not a crit.
Ray?
I rolled an 18.
Oh.
That's a hit.
Yeah.
The spear only crits on a natural 20.
So I did hit it, which is good. That reach a hit. Yeah, the spear only crits on a natural 20. So I did hit it, which is good.
That reach is phenomenal.
It's like having a giant character.
I've never had a character with that before.
Yeah, I haven't either.
It's so awesome.
In our last Pathfinder society game,
I was playing as a rogue fighter,
and I picked up a spear with reach and sneak attack
with flanking.
That's pretty fucking awesome.
Five points of damage to the rat.
Five points of damage. So this rat came up, went fucking awesome. Five points of damage to the rat.
So this rat came up, went to bite for four points of damage to you, but
retconning that, you killed it before it even
Oh, nice! Right through its mouth.
So don't take those
four points of damage, obviously. Wow.
One shot it. Thank you, Skid.
Yeah, always here to help.
Skid, way to know Joe's character better than
Joe does. I'm still learning
Gormley
can I see either of the rats in there
no
then I'm going to step up
alongside Baron
and touch him
and cast guidance
oh nice
is that a hex or is that just like a spell
level 0 spell
alright so what does it do I'll tell you that Oh, nice. Oh. Is that a hex or is that just like a spell? That's just a level zero spell. Womp, womp, womp, womp.
All right, so what does it do?
Yeah.
I'll tell you that in just one second.
It breaks his handgun.
He gets a plus one competence bonus on a single attack roll, saving throw, or skill check.
Nice.
You have to choose to use the bonus before you.
Nice.
Does your reach weapon work around corners
For attacks of opportunity
No
Because you cannot take
Just learn this
Cannot take attacks of opportunity
Against anyone with any sort of cover
Even partial cover
Cannot take attacks of opportunity against
Well
This rat
There's a wall here.
So he's going to charge right up and try and bite you because he's not super intelligent.
Oh, so I can take it.
No, wait.
No, but unless you have combat reflexes, you can't take another attack.
I cannot.
You cannot take it.
Because I can only take one attack of opportunity.
Get him, rat.
Kill him.
Wow, so now this rat is just going to.
I fucking hated Lorik since the beginning.
Get that guy. Get that green-skinned. He turns around. He's like now this rat is just going to... I fucking hated Lorik since the beginning. Get that guy.
Get that green-skinned.
He turns around, he's like, what did you just say?
Nuh-uh, nothing.
I was just thinking out loud.
You look down, and there's like a gaping sore on your ankle
where the first one bit you that's starting to fester,
and this one goes and tries to sink its teeth in that same spot.
Oh, that's so gross.
And it misses.
Thank God.
Great job, Brett.
All right, Lork.
Lork the festering orc.
Lork the festering orc.
All right, I'll attack the one that just attacked me
that's right in front of me.
Fair enough.
15 to hit.
Ooh, 15 hits.
All right.
All right.
15 to hit ooh 15 hits
alright
12 damage
12 damage?
maximum damage
wow
you skewer it
yeah
with your spear
and kill it
holy shit
that spear would have
skewered a wild rat
dead city
two dead rats
right in front of you
um
fuck with lork
and then I will
uh
take a
young
oh I'm gonna actually
uh
move out
of the way
and give uh
clearance to my
my dwarf friend here
to blow this thing away
okay
so you're gonna take a
oh yeah
you haven't moved yet
so you can just move
uh
yeah and I don't provoke
because I have partial cover
from that thing
correct
uh alright Galabras you look down at your leg it's still festering yeah so you can just move. Yeah, and I don't provoke because I have partial cover from that thing. Correct.
All right, Galabras.
You look down at your leg, it's still festering.
Yeah, I am uncomfortable with what's happening to my leg.
I'm going to hold.
I'm just going to hold.
Galabras with the hold.
So ready or delay?
I'm just going to delay.
Delay, okay.
All right.
Time delay.
Van Delay Industries.
President for... Baron Von Gunslinger.
Baron is going to do a swift action reload with paper cartridge.
Okay.
And he's going to...
You know what?
He's going to get up close and deadly with this rat.
Yeah.
He doesn't have to get that up close, but that's fine.
Well, he's got cover unless you move into the room.
Do you want to move into the room?
No.
You won't provoke.
I won't move into the room if I provoke?
You won't provoke if you move into the room, no.
Okay.
Move me in there.
So I'm right up next to this fucking rat.
You just walk in the door and point a gun right at its face.
I put the barrel of my gun into its toothy little fucking rat and I hurt my... You just walk in the door and point a gun right at its face. I put the barrel of my gun into
its toothy little fucking
rat mouth. And you have plus one
from the guidance. Plus one from the guidance.
So plus six total on this roll.
Ooh, 21.
That is a direct hit.
It's like shooting
rats in a stairwell.
Oh! It's like shooting rats in a stairwell Oh You're rolling
Eight damage
You rolled two die for damage?
Well I have up close and deadly
Which is plus 1d6
Oh
Another 1d6
That's awesome
Who's standing right outside this door?
Gormley is the closest
Gormley all you see is like
He pulls the trigger
And then just like
Hair and guts hit him.
He's just covered like a
Tarantino movie.
And a gunslinger note, because
I killed that diarette,
I don't use my grip point.
So the grip point I would have used
on Up Close and Deadly. So you use the grip point to get
the extra 1d6 on the Up Close and Deadly.
But since you killed it, you get it right back.
Killing blow. That's so cool.
That's awesome.
I love it.
I love it.
And the other thing I can get grip points back for
are doing daring actions.
So I'm not going to tell you what my next daring action was,
but I have one loaded up.
All right.
And what is that, GM's discretion?
It is.
So if it's not daring enough for you, you let me know.
It won't be.
Oh, I will.
Can I have a bottle cap, please?
Just ask Skid for them.
Skid gives them out.
I got a ton of them.
You can get a bottle cap six times per day.
Right, there you go.
I got one from my Lagunitas Brewing Company.
Little something something.
If Lagunitas would like to sponsor this podcast, let us know.
Oh, I'm sure they would.
That is a good beer.
It's a delight.
Sure they would.
That is a good beer.
It's a delight.
You're a little familiar with this room since you peeked in, saw furry dog things coming and ran.
But the dogs turned out to be dire rats. And now you're in the room and there sits, in front of the staircase leading down, a steel lockbox.
Let's just leave the lockbox for now, right?
Don't you think?
Yeah, we don't have any need to open you think We don't need to use our lock
Can we just check it out first
I think we tried it out
It is locked I tried to open it
Can it be carried
I don't think any
Rats are going to come in
And take it away
Something tells me that
We're fine leaving it here for the moment
But we just don't want to
if we need our knock spell
to open some locked door
downstairs
yeah
my point was that
if we don't need to use it at all
then he can write it
or she can write it
into her spell book
I don't think I can actually
it's not a witch spell
oh then you can't
oh it isn't at all
it's a wizard or sorcerer
oh that makes sense
can I even use it
well you have to
roll like a spellcraft check
to be able to use it
oh well I can do that I have a lot of spellcraft check to be able to use it. Oh, well, I could do that.
I have a lot of spellcraft.
So let's go downstairs first.
It's not going anywhere.
So it's pretty big.
There's no way you can carry it unless you all like said.
All right, guys, help me with this end.
So are you saying you're going to head down the stairs?
Well, you know.
Oh, oh.
Can you cast Diagnosed Disease? Is that a level 1 spell?
Yeah
I definitely have a disease
I don't know that we should be going into this
I mean, I didn't prepare it
I think we should probably
Can I do a heal check to see
What kind of disease he has?
Yeah, I could
Fuck your heal check, it's time for the gunslinger to do it.
I have a heel check, too.
As a ranger, you know.
I have a, I can do a heel check.
To maybe identify or.
Bam, 25 heel check.
Holy shit.
He is sick with a filth fever.
And can you describe filth fever to me?
It will at some point do significant damage
to both Dex and Khan once the fever sets in.
You've seen this before on your travels.
Yeah.
To both Dex and Khan.
That's bad.
Galabras, suck out the poison.
Oh, all right.
Pee on his leg.
Pee on his leg.
All right.
So what do you want to do?
I don't want to force you to do nothing
you ain't ready for.
Well, let's...
Well, I think I got...
I think I'm okay for now.
Yeah, let's just...
Let's just go down...
For a day.
We can get back to the sanctuary
and a higher level cleric can heal you.
Yeah.
We have ten hope knives we can sell to pay for that.
Yeah.
You just feel like...
Gross.
Yeah, Lork doesn't feel well.
But there's no discernible damage.
But Lork's not a complainer.
No.
He's just going to be like,
I'm fine, I'm fine.
Let's go. Let's go down the stairs. I'm fine. I'm fine. Let's go.
Let's go down the stairs.
I'm sure there's nothing down there.
Okay, so you guys head down the stairs.
Yep.
Troy has just revealed the second floor map.
Bill Murray, the flowers are still standing,
Ghostbusters sort of move.
Troy took the first map off the top,
and there was already the second floor drawn on the next map.
So you guys descend,
uh, descend.
You guys descend.
No.
You guys descend these stone stairs,
and they end
in a dark subterranean
chamber.
I'm going to crack a sunrod.
It's a
type of magical torch.
Magical torch. I have one.
Do you lose stuff for doing that?
Because I can cast light
on some object.
Yeah, I can do it too too, on some little object.
Yeah, I can do it, too.
You know, half your party can just see you right now,
so thanks for wasting it. I know, Lork is like,
Oh, God! It's so bright!
I'm encumbered because I'm carrying too much weight, so I'm trying to get rid of some of this.
Yeah.
And you hear a lone
piano player in the
distance. And being encumbered makes your character walk more slowly
and reduces some of the bonuses you have to skill checks for the listeners.
Yes, yes.
Okay, so it is this dark subterranean chamber.
You guys come down the stairs.
There's a landing and then another stair set and it
opens into this room
with multiple
means of egress, like to the
north, to the west.
Looks like a lot of hallways.
Around the corner
to the south, you see a lone statue
relegated to a dusty
corner behind the stairs that you just descended.
And then a doorway off in the stairs that you just descended. And then
a doorway off in the distance and multiple
hallways.
Okay. I think
I mean, Lurk's
instinct is to check the
backmost hallway that isn't a
door.
Northernmost hallway.
If something comes through the door, we'll
hear it, but something might sneak up behind us down the hall,
so he'd like to look down this hallway.
He's going to take a peek around there?
Yeah, peek around the corner.
So he goes to this, you know, it just looks very snaky.
There's multiple ways that he can go.
I'm trying to get a visual description.
And he sees that it ends and turns.
To the left.
To the left.
He'll continue up. Do you want to come
right behind me? Alright, so he's going to go
around this little corner and then look around the left
around the snake curve.
Alright, so he's going to continue that line of
walking. Everyone's going to follow with you.
Alright, so you...
And you see that
the...
there is a
an opening to your left,
and then the hallway just keeps continuing down.
And I can't...
It ends.
Oh, it ends.
It looks like it continues on.
So basically, you look around the corner,
you see an opening to the left, not too far away, and then the end of the hall, it turns see uh an opening to the left not too far away
and then the end of the hall it turns another opening to the left yeah oh geez hope you like
options man there's time all right i'll step up and i'll take a peek around the first curve
to the left okay uh you take a peek around the first curve um and you see
another hallway that looks like
it opens into a larger room.
Okay.
We'll start moving down that
hallway. Just show me on the
map right there. And is
everybody with you? Yeah, we all go
follow him behind Lork
and Baron. Okay.
Just as you
get to the exact space that you're
in, Lork,
you hear
ting, ting, ting, ting, ting, ting, ting!
And who are the two people
behind you?
Oh, crap.
Baron and Galabras.
So, Lork
steps on something and
interlocked
bear traps start
to lurch out at
all three of your feet.
So I think
Gormley is the only one unaffected.
The first one goes to try
and hit
Lork. Is there any reflex save associated?
No.
It's an attack roll.
It's an attack.
12.
Miss.
Miss.
And then the next one is Baron.
24.
Nope.
That's a miss.
So it does nine points of damage.
Oh, Jesus.
And the sharp jaws sprung shut around your ankles,
and it's holding you completely immobile.
Holy shit.
And then the last one tries to lock on Galabras.
13.
It's a miss.
And a miss.
We don't need Galabras getting...
I'm going to try to free...
I'm going to try to pry open the bear trap.
Y'all, I've been snake bit.
I love your assistance.
So it's like a clap trap bear trap.
Yeah, just like kong, kong, kong,
and you and Galabras just move just out of the way
before it snaps near your feet.
So can I try to pry open his bear trap?
Sure, you want to do a strength check?
Yeah.
Give me a fist.
And you guys can assist, which is what, a plus two?
Yeah.
Yep.
So I think it's DC, was it DC 10 to assist?
Or you got to roll 10.
Yeah, you got to roll, yeah.
I am unable to assist.
All right.
10.
So no assistance.
Oh, you got a 10.
Okay.
Okay.
So plus two. All right. Ten. So no assistance. Oh, you got ten. Okay. Okay. So plus two.
Plus two.
Eleven.
No, it's...
Am I able to assist, considering it's on my foot?
Well, I can also take ten.
It would take minutes to do this, unless there's something attacking us.
These are options.
Or you can also do a disabled device or escape artist. I could do escape artist. You would have to do this unless there's something attacking us. These are options. Or you can also do a disabled device or escape artist.
I could do escape artist.
You would have to do escape artist.
Somebody else could disable device.
I can escape artist.
We don't have a rogue.
We have no disabled device.
I'm going to add a point to escape artist.
We couldn't even have found the trap.
20, natural 20 escape artist plus three.
All right, come on.
No, I was going to say
the 11 helped a little bit.
It was DC 22
so the plus 3 got it.
Oh, wow.
Holy shit.
Rip it open.
DC 22 escape artists.
No, no, we get it open
like a little bit
but somehow this crafty
little bastard
wiggles out of it.
He's seen bear traps
in his day.
Before he snaps shut again.
Clang!
Nice job.
Nice job.
Y'all, unfortunately I am not feeling at my tippy-toppy.
Any sort of healing.
I'm going to channel again.
I'd really appreciate that, Galabras.
He says, don't worry, my friends.
I will summon the divine energies of my deity.
Six!
Fuck, yes, guys. For the listeners, six is the most he could have healed us for. The divine energies of my deity. Six! Fuck yes!
For the listeners, six is the most he could have healed us for.
Yeah.
Nice job.
I'm shocked that... I'm well into my second level hit points now.
I'm shocked that only hit one of two.
That bear trap had a plus ten to attack.
Whoa.
2d6 plus three damage.
Jesus!
And it only hit one guy.
And one of them wasn't the cleric.
That's shocking.
We should have died.
I am absolutely putting up with that.
We should have all of us in this hallway screaming and writhing in pain with Gormley just being like, uh.
I don't know.
I only have a nine strength.
I'm going back to town.
Starting a new life.
I'll definitely come back.
I'll find someone and we'll come back. I'll find someone
and we'll come back.
I love that trap though.
What a badass trap.
I'm going to be
really great at
escape artists
once I put a point into it.
I'm going to do that
next level.
You should.
Alright, so what do we see
in this room
that I walked up to
obviously too quickly?
Well, as I draw it
I think I'm going to need
some more epic music.
Alright.
Let's see. You mean like
Battletoads? Totally.
Battletoads? That's the hardest game
ever. That's a really hard game.
Fuck that game.
I just, I still want
to know where the guy
playing piano earlier was
yeah we'll find him
just Liberace
by himself in the corner
ding dong ding dong
I wish my brother George was here
this makes me want to play the
flute really badly
do you play the flute?
No, I'm a trombonist.
I would have guessed that.
No, the reason they put me on it is because I was so large
that they knew my lung capacity would be adequate for it.
But they put other kids that were big and untalented on the tuba
because the tuba is way easier to play.
But because I had some sort of
musical affinity they put me on a thing that required a little bit more talent the flute
no the trombone trombone versus the tuba i played trombone yeah yeah we should start a ska band
that's only trombone trombone uh fantasy themes Fantasy themes. Scobhead. Let's check out our embouchures, guys.
Okay, so you guys continue.
Okay, so you guys continue into the room.
And I'm going to give you a little description of what's going on here.
Embedded into the floor of this chamber is a 10-foot diameter granite emblem of a faded gold and white longsword.
Aha. Four passages lead out of the chamber in different directions. 10-foot diameter granite emblem of a faded gold and white longsword. Aha!
Four passages lead out of the chamber in different directions.
A porticullis blocks the southern exit.
I made little dots there, as you can see.
Southern is the one that's closest to me.
And a sturdy wooden door leads west.
That's the door that I just drew.
And there is a small chest on the southern wall
and a decrepit bookshelf on the southern wall and a decrepit
bookshelf on the opposite
wall, which I also drew.
And you think to yourself, oh, that's all that's in here, right?
Nope.
Aww.
There is also
a orc.
Half orc, rather. Half orc half orc rather
half orc
and
a giant
troll
oh
why
why
wait a minute
whoa
back up
back up
back up
back up
roll initiative
for the battle
of your life
gonna battle with your wife.
That's a bad taste.
I hope you brought your hope knife.
I hope your name is Ray Rice.
Lorca's coming up huge.
Oh no, I in no way condone that.
That's fucking awful.
No, we at the Glass Cannon Podcast
absolutely condemn Ray Rice and his actions.
And the Baltimore Ravens as a whole.
Yeah, fuck them.
And I'm so glad Troy Polamalu retired.
Unless any of you are listening are fans.
Joe Flacco's the smartest quarterback I've ever met.
Anybody got above 20? Yes. 21. 20've ever met anybody got above 20?
yes
21
20
okay
everyone got above 20
let me start with
Lork 21
Lork 21
anybody higher than 21?
who's the 20?
20 for Baron?
and Skid was 21 as well
no
what'd you get
Gormley?
11
Jell?
Gell? what? who? 11. Gel? Gal?
What?
Who?
11.
Oh, I'm sorry.
So Gormley and Gal both got 11.
Gormley goes first.
All right.
So, standing before you
is a giant flood troll
and a half-orc.
And they were talking, and a half orc. And,
um,
they were talking and you just disturbed them.
Lork,
you're up.
Can I ask you a question about trolls first?
Yeah.
I mean,
I have,
are,
is a troll a giant subtype?
Uh,
it is a media.
Well, it's funny.
It says medium humanoid in parentheses giant.
Yeah.
So I guess that's, okay. Oh, so that's, that's actually. It says medium humanoid, in parentheses, giant. Yeah. Oh, it is?
Oh, so that's actually Lork's favorite enemy.
Is?
Giants.
Giant subtype?
Of the giant subtype?
Yeah, humanoid giant subtype.
Which means like, and that's part of his,
because that's what he was fighting back in the day.
Right.
So it's been a long time since he's...
It looks like this.
Oh, wow.
Oh, look at the tumbler.
It's kind of like oh
it's got a huge
horse face
it's a chick
and the great thing
about Baron
is that he has
defensive training
plus four
dodge bonus
against monsters
of the giant subtype
as a dwarf
oh this is awesome
I'm gonna fucking
do a backflip
through his legs y'all
okay
escape artist
well it's Lork's turn first
okay so I want to see this backflip through his legs y'all okay escape artist well it's Lork's turn first okay so
I want to see this backflip
yeah
Lork is just like
ah it's bringing me back
to my younger days
and he just
stabs at this thing
from
from reach
which is just so awesome
and gets a plus two bonus
because it's a
giant
or giant subtype
14 damn it Lork because it's a giant or a giant subtype.
14.
Damn it, Lork.
Shit.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
Fool.
Fuck.
Get your head in the game, man.
Is that all the Lorkmeister can do?
Yeah, I mean,
he's not going to move in there.
That seems silly. No, don't move in there? Yeah, I mean, he's not going to move in there. That seems silly.
No, don't move in there.
Yeah, why would you?
He attacks and misses.
Damn it, Lork.
Lork, roll a perception check.
It's been too long.
It's been too long.
Seven.
I guess that didn't help.
Nope.
Baron. Baron.
So their special... Well, I guess I'm still medium size
Is there a special rule
Around moving through a giant square
Like a character
Two sizes larger than you
No
Well the one thing is
It's the same
If you move from 10 feet away
From 15 feet away to 10 feet away
No
From 10 feet away To 5 To 5 feet away to 10 feet away no from 10 feet away to five to five
feet away it gets an attack of opportunity because it can swing farther than you can reach it's like
a bully that puts his hand on your head and you just you can't swing at him stop hitting yourself
why no you as far as i know unless there's you have a dwarven special ability there is not a
basic rule ability that allows you to move through a square of a creature two sizes higher than you.
It's three sizes higher than you.
You can move through without anything.
Okay.
Yeah, so it needs one more level bigger.
So I'm just going to fucking reach around my main man lork.
If I were tall enough, I would put my gun right up next to his ear.
Damn it.
Put it between his legs.
I'm going to put it between his legs.
What have I ever done to you?
And I'm going to say, suck on this half-orc deer.
Oh, boy.
Lork is just sticking his pelvis out there.
And then, boom!
Oh, boy.
Up close and deadly.
So what are you, did you move?
Nope.
Or are you just peeking around the corner?
Yep, sticking it through his legs.
This is my boom dick.
And you're shooting.
Say hello to my boom dick.
And you're shooting at the troll, eh?
Well, we could kill the smaller enemy quicker,
but the troll can do way more damage.
Troll's going to regenerate anyway, so maybe you want to...
The smaller enemy has cover from you.
Oh, then shoot the troll.
Troll.
Shoot the troll, shoot the troll.
Shoot the troll. Troll. Shoot the troll. Shoot the troll. Shoot the troll.
Ooh. Ooh, yeah.
That's a 22 to hit.
Hi-ya.
Two on the toes.
I lost the epic music here. Let's see.
I'm trying to find something different for, like,
a troll. Working on it.
Nine.
Nine. Ooh. Nine damage.
Damn. Hello, nurse.
Damn.
Okay, well, now it's the troll's turn.
There he is.
That's a little loud.
Tell that to the troll.
But it's accurate.
Well, the troll just comes,
charging at Lork.
Should have readied an action.
It pounces him and makes two claw attacks.
The first one, 11.
Miss.
Okay, the second one, 21.
Hits.
Hits him.
Four.
Three points of damage.
Not too shabby.
You're lucky because if he had hit with both I believe trolls can do a rend
attack so they can like terror you.
Just be dead.
Rend is pretty brutal. And that would have been
bad for the rest of us.
And for Lork. I think Lork
is going to call a fallback here.
It is Gormley's
turn. Fallback! Gormley's turn.
Fallback!
Gormley's going to evil eye the troll.
There you go.
That's what I'm talking about.
All right, you're going to evil eye the...
DC 14 will save.
DC 14 will save.
This thing has no will.
What does evil eye do?
I'm going to give it a minus two to its AC.
Oh, that's pretty brutal.
Let me see if it succeeds.
What's the DC?
14.
Critical miss.
Yeah!
So that takes a minus two to its AC.
So describe, Garland, describe.
What do you do?
So I look around Galabras.
You're within range, yes.
Over Baron. And, within range, yes.
Over Baron, and kind of to the side of Lork,
and give it the meanest, cruelest, most disgusting evil eye look right into its eyes.
Stink eye.
And for six rounds, you have a minus two to your AC.
Holy shit.
And then as a move action, I'm going to cackle with glee.
And you'll take
and I'll extend it for another round. So that's
seven rounds. Whoa!
It's like Donovan said,
it's the season of the fucking witch.
Nice job. Okay,
that's dropping that AC for
the encounter.
So, Galabras, you're up.
Galabras is going to help further. He's going to draw upon
the Divine Favor of Desna
and cast Bless.
Which will affect all of us.
Gives everybody a plus one to attack.
Holy shit, that's great.
And also plus one to save
against fear effects.
Nice.
I'm going to write it.
Plus one to attack.
This is awesome.
Okay.
Come on, Lork.
Got your blast on.
Plus one to attack and plus one to save against fear effects,
which you probably wouldn't be able to play.
Okay.
This guy,
the half-orc.
Can't do she.
He can probably go around us, can he?
He steps one step closer to that hallway
leading to the north.
And he throws
this
Oh, I'm sorry yes
Lork has cover
so that gives you a plus 2 to your AC
because he can see
more than half of them and he throws this like
bag at Lork's
feet. Does he take a minus 4?
Yes because the troll. So it's minus 6
total. Yeah we can do it that way
minus 6 total
misses.
All right.
Jesus.
Okay.
That sounded like a tangle foot bag to me.
It was of the same ilk.
Round the two.
Lork, you're up.
All right, Lork's going to keep calling for a fallback.
He's like, I have no room to work here.
I know he's going to stab again.
Hopefully hit this time.
19 to hit.
19 to hit.
Minus two to the AC.
Minus two to the AC.
I believe that is a hit.
Yes.
Look.
And he does plus two to damage against giants.
Nice.
Fucking awesome.
11 damage It yells out in pain
Baron
We need the witch's fire
Trolls are neither goblinoids nor orcs
Correct?
No they're neither yeah
Okay
They are trolls
Got it
Just wanted to double check
So as a swift action
Baron reloads his pistol.
Instead of with the traditional paper cartridge, a flare cartridge reaches through the legs of Lork.
Lork pelvic thrusts.
That's not good.
That is a 11.
Miss.
Damn.
How many of those do you get?
I have four total, but it's dope if it hits.
So are they consumable?
Yes.
Do you have to buy more when you run out of them?
I can make more with my alchemy.
Okay.
But basically, if it hits, do you want to know or do you want to know if it hits?
Just wait. We'll wait and see if it hits.
Okay, this thing is going to take a five foot step back
but with its reach it can still do
two attacks. The flood troll
is going to try and claw at
Lork again because that's all it can
reach.
You nervous, Lork?
Yeah, yeah, should be.
Uh, first one
misses. Nice.
Second one,
12? Miss. Miss, miss.
Nice, Lork! He's dodging,
he's ducking, he's, yeah.
And he's got a bum knee. Yeah,
exactly. Queen of the Evil Eye herself,
Gormley, you're up.
I can't see the half-orc from where I am, can I?
No.
So I'm going to do another Evil Eye on the troll, this time on attack rolls.
Oh, okay.
So it's another roll.
Another DC 14.
And then please get out of there.
We need to move out.
Okay, and you're definitely within range, yes?
Yeah.
That one is also a fail.
Sweet!
Double evil eye.
So now it takes a minus two to attack?
Minus two to attack for six rounds.
Oh, oh.
And then I'm going to move back the way we came to give us some room.
Good teamwork, Galabras.
Nice work, man.
Nice work, man. Nice work. Galabras is going to
use a bit of luck on
Baron.
Pat him on the shoulder and say,
good luck, friend.
And then run away.
Yeah, good luck.
Run away.
Okay. Totally
lost the page that I had here,
which is awesome.
So now, are you still considered
in melee combat with the troll
with its reach?
Would it step back five feet?
Because of the ranged attack of the half-orc,
you're asking?
Yeah.
If the half-orc decides to range back.
Indeed, the short answer is
I don't know.
But I would assume
yes,
because I believe
it's if you're
threatening
melee combat,
which we both are.
We're both threatening
each other.
Nothing has changed
in that respect.
Right.
So I think that
the disadvantage
is still there.
Because the troll
is reaching out at me
and I'm reaching out at him.
So there's all kinds of, like...
Sameness.
Sameness to the situation.
That's how we play it the last game we played.
Right, okay, that makes sense.
Okay.
So this guy is going to step up.
This is the half-orc.
This is the half-orc.
He'll step right up. to step up. This is the half-orc. This is the half-orc. He'll step right up.
Step right up.
Fuck.
No, do it.
No.
So you have cover around the corner there.
And it's going to swing a morning star at you.
Just call the angel, the morning star. Misses. me Angel with the Morningstar.
Misses.
Misses with the Morningstar.
Lork, you're getting,
you're testing your luck here.
Next round, Lork, you're up.
All right, I am going to
shit.
You're gonna shit?
There's no time for that
That was not the time
That was good
Alright I'm gonna try to get out of here
So I'm gonna
I'm gonna stab at the troll again
But I wanna make
I wanna kinda stab and pull back
I wanna do a coordinated retreat
With my teammates here
Okay
Natty
20 Are you fucking I have never I have never seen this many coordinated retreat with my teammates here. Okay. Natty, 20.
Are you fucking...
I have never seen this many critical hits.
Especially from Joe.
So what did you try to do?
I was going to stab him and then pull back.
So I was just, you know, and then
fall back. So I critted, though.
Well, I...
Critical threat. I've got to see if I confirm
the crit.
Maybe not AC 15
Confirmed
Holy shit
Thanks to his evil eye
Thanks to the evil eye
Yes
Love this witch
Here's your card
Around the corner of you here
Oh wait a minute
Mine is times three
For the spear
Okay so that
So we say
So we give two cards
Two cards
And I get to choose the one that I want more.
This is a piercing weapon?
Oh, shit.
Yeah, it's a piercing weapon, and I severely wound the troll's shoulder.
Double damage and 1d2 strength and 1d2 dex.
Oh, goodness gracious. Double damage and 1d2 strength and 1d2 dex.
Oh, goodness gracious.
So I hit it right in the shoulder joint and basically dislocate one of its arms.
What's it called?
What is that?
It's called shoulder wound.
Nice.
And so we're going to roll a d6 for each of these, and odds are one and evens are two?
Yeah.
Right, right. Well, first I'm going to the the double damage okay to the to the joint which
is pretty severe so um so it's 22 damage it's it's barely standing okay so 22 22 damage yeah
yeah because he gets this is his favorite enemy like it is in the old days lork fought a lot of
giants and a lot of trolls and he he hates them. And he knows everything
about their anatomy. And he was like, if I take out
its shoulder,
it'll never be able to fight back.
Boom! Stabs right in the shoulder.
It's standing on one leg. Okay.
And it takes
two strength damage
and
one dex damage.
Yay.
Okay, I'm going to work on those
numbers while Baron goes.
So, oh, and I guess we should say
lowering its strength is going to lower its ability to hit
and its damage. Lowering its dex
is going to make it easier to hit, possibly.
Does Lork still move?
Yes, and then
yeah, he's not afraid at all, so he's just going to
withdraw back and the thing gets an attack of opportunity. The troll gets an attack of opportunity. Yes, and then He's not afraid at all, so he's just going to withdraw Back
The thing gets an attack of opportunity
The troll gets an attack of opportunity
Okay, and
It
It misses
What's your AC?
Yeah, 16
Baron was going to
Load up with his flare cartridge
But after seeing
Lork finally
justify his existence
he is instead
going to reload with his
alchemical paper cartridge
and he is going
to get up close and deadly.
And he gets two rolls
thanks to the little bit of luck from
Galabras.
Amazing. 19.
That's definitely a hit.
That's a hit.
Let me do my second one.
Does the...
14.
Does the gun not threaten on a 19 roll?
No, it's a times four.
Oh, Jesus.
Wow.
So it hit it.
Hit it, And then The damage
Two
Two
Minimum
Oh man
Minimum possible damage
Thanks to the
Efforts of Lork
That is enough
To fell
Yeah
Shit we killed
A giant troll
But it's gonna come back
Unless we put some fire
I can come
Lork says
I did it
I did it
I did it
Okay I'm sorry put some fire on it. I can come around. Lork says, I did it. I did it. I did it.
Okay.
I'm sorry.
It is Gormley's turn.
Oh, you can... Oh, no, you can't go around.
Well, no.
That's a portcull.
Well, yeah,
I'll scream that it's down
if you want to try
to come around
and burning hands it.
Yeah, can I shoot
my burning hands
through the portculls?
Can you move that far?
I don't know if you can move that far, but maybe.
No, you can't move that far and cast Burning Hands.
Let's see if you can come around the other way.
You can step in front of me, though.
No, so he can either stand behind you and shoot Burning Hands through you as well.
And you've got to take the risk.
Well, any creature in the area of the flames of Burning Hands
takes 1d4 points of damage per caster level.
But he gets a reflex save.
It would be dangerous.
Probably silly. No, it's worth it.
Because it's not going to kill him, but it will
definitely kill the troll.
It'll permanently kill the troll.
Alright, I'll come around. Do it.
So he can make it.
He's going to try to do it without hurting.
My reflex save against spell-like abilities is, like, plus eight.
Oh, well, beautiful.
So you're going to do it?
You're going to cast it?
I'm going to cast it right now.
So Baron's like, shoot it!
Do it!
He's just like, do it!
All you have to do is deal a single point of fire damage to it,
and it's gone.
I know.
So it gets a save, though, right?
That's for half, right?
Yes.
Just to tag it.
Yeah, so you do the burning hand,
so roll the damage.
Two points of damage. No, no, no.
It's 1d4 per caster level.
And now you're two.
You're level two now.
Four points of damage.
No, no, no.
You roll it again for the second level.
Four points of damage.
He's a seer.
He's like Catrezra over here.
So Gormley walks up
behind Baron and her hands
start to glow and fire shoots
out around Baron's head.
27.
So he dodges it. He only takes
two points of fire damage. Now who else is rolling
reflex save? The Flood and the Half-Orc? The Half-Orc of fire damage. Now who else is rolling reflex save? The flood and the half-orc?
The half-orc is in error.
The flood can't...
How can he roll a reflex save?
He's unconscious.
He's unconscious and dying.
And the...
It's a cone of searing flame.
Shoots from your fingertips.
Would that go around the corner?
It's straight ahead.
The body of the troll is straight through the hole.
But the question is,
the cone, is it going to flood?
I would say no.
Okay.
All right, Galabras.
Is there any creature in the area?
So the troll catches on fire.
The half-orc is standing next to the body of the troll.
Is there anything in the area of the flame?
No, no, the flame being the 15-foot cone,
and that wall is blocking it.
The orc is going to be able to be like,
it comes out through the hallway next to it. The orc is going to be able to be like, oh, it's like,
it comes out through the hallway next to it.
The corpse of the troll is catching on fire.
Galabras is just going to huddle in fear.
And Galabras huddles in fear.
The half-orc bolts for this hallway.
What a bitch.
Oh, shit.
Can we try to capture him if we can get to him?
Well, are we still in combat?
Depends on what you're going to do. It would be
Lork's turn. Let's turn this down here.
Since this guy's dead,
we'll kill that. If you
choose to chase him,
we'll obviously stay in combat.
If you hang back, you're out of combat.
I say that we are at an advantage if we can prepare for the next battle.
I think he's probably going to a place with more people.
Yeah.
I think that we might have even got Roderick's flood troll.
I don't know that he killed his flood troll.
So we might have got one of the main culprits here.
We should probably check his body.
Absolutely. And maybe investigate a little bit around this circle,
but I don't know that we need to be delving deeper.
We've used some spells.
We're low on hit points.
I don't know.
Well, regardless, we'll check out the troll.
Okay, so you're just searching the body of the flood troll?
For right now, yeah.
You don't see, find anything
on the body whatsoever.
So it wasn't using weapons, it was clawing.
It was just clawing, straight clawing.
Big ol' snout,
just gross.
And it was a woman.
It was a female troll. It had gross
flood troll breasts.
And we mentioned it before, but just to clarify,
the thing was unconscious, but it could have come back to life
because that's their special ability, unless you burn them.
Right.
It very well could have.
Thank you.
Go on, Leigh.
Go on, Leigh.
Possibly, but it's also a different kind of troll.
Maybe it had different abilities.
Yeah, whatever, Troy.
But you guys get to go.
Can we do a knowledge religion on the circle here?
Is it some sort of Iomadai circle, or is it...
Is it like the graffiti?
No, this is a...
It's embedded into the floor, a granite emblem
of a faded gold and white longsword.
All right, so it is old-school Iomadai.
And just to reiterate what's in the room, it was that emblem,
the four different passages leading every which way,
and a small chest and a decrepit bookshelf.
And you want to do a knowledge religion check on the seal?
I don't think it's necessary.
I thought that it was like newly painted on there, but it's an old Yomadai.
I'm going to do it anyway.
Yeah.
16.
Yeah, it's obviously.
Let me open that chest.
It is the most clear symbol of Yomadai
that you've seen so far.
But with that thing,
you realize is that those white swords
that you've been seeing in town,
that graffiti,
they're different from this.
It's not quite the same thing.
Okay.
Is it so similar that it warrants comparison,
or is it so dissimilar
that it doesn't even warrant comparison to Iomidae?
You could see why people think that they're similar,
but now that you see this very ornate,
perfect symbol of it,
you realize that it's nothing like it.
Lurk is going to do a perception check on the bookshelf
for any interesting tomes.
Tomes, as it were?
Because he likes reading a lot.
He's real smart.
Just to do some light reading on the way back to Trinale.
I can read!
Gormley's going to join you and do her own perception check.
Ooh, 20 even.
20 even.
Adjusted 20.
23.
Oh, well, that makes sense.
You guys are looking,
and it seems like the bookshelf holds very little of value,
only the mostly destroyed pages of Yomadai's holy text,
which is called Acts of Yomadai,
and then there are several other scriptures
that are all pretty weathered.
Okay.
Do we want to look at that chest?
There's a chest in the room?
I'm going to check out the chest.
Of the troll.
Gross.
Because she's a lit...
No, I'm not.
All right, I'm going to...
Galabras is clearly a virgin
12 on the chest
Okay
23 on the chest
I'm sorry
It's just like
You said 12 on the chest
I'm imagining you just
Exploring
The chest
Six fingers on each hand
It seems like it is full of loot
Really?
Really
All right, get your pens and pencils out.
You find the following.
One ounce of sovereign
glue. What the fuck is
sovereign glue? We'll look it up later.
Two doses
of universal solvent.
It may sound silly now,
but maybe it means something. We'll think about it.
Fifty feet of silk rope. Ooh, that's light. but maybe it means something. We'll think about it. 50 feet of silk rope.
Ooh, that's light.
No, it's good.
It's better than regular rope.
It is.
I have hempen rope.
You find a disguise kit with six uses remaining.
Ooh, that sounds like a bear in use.
A set of thieves' tools.
Classic.
Yeah, for a rogueless party.
Right.
You always need some thieves' tools that you don't know how to use.
A noble's outfit, which I'm just going to
tell you is worth 75 gold pieces.
Is that anything
that rings any sort of bell to us at all?
Like, were there any, like, known
nobles missing
or anything like that in True Now?
No, but this is clearly like a True Now
in noble's clothing.
So somebody bid it.
This goes deep.
There is a signet ring.
A signet ring worth 50 gold pieces.
And lastly, coins totaling.
You guys got a nice little haul here.
237 gold pieces.
Oh, there we go.
That's our first haul of the adventure.
155 silver pieces. And 55 gold pieces. Oh, there we go. That's our first haul of the adventure. 155 silver pieces.
And 55 copper pieces.
Beautiful.
Can I do a quick check?
Can anyone do a quick check on the signet to see whose house or who it identifies?
That would be a knowledge nobility.
If anyone has knowledge nobility.
Don't got it.
Would a knowledge local help me out?
I don't have it.
Yeah. If it's a local
nobility,
that's up to Troy to determine, but roll it.
Yeah, you roll.
That's a nine.
No, I'm sorry, it's a six.
You know
less than you knew before you asked.
I live in the mountains with a scorpion,
so it's not my fault.
Nobility is your strong suit. I'm so excited mountains with a scorpion, so it's not my fault. Yeah, nobility isn't your strong suit.
I'm so excited to think about what we could do with this gold.
Troy, could I possibly do... So we've explored a little bit, I would even venture to say possibly more than half-ish,
of the lower level of this thing, at least visible.
Can I do a knowledge dungeoneering check? Is there any reason to
think that this
is more than just a basement of the church?
Meaning, does it delve
deep underground, or is
it just as wide as the church?
Have we basically explored most
of this? Yeah, you can absolutely do a knowledge
dungeoneering. I'll try.
From back in your dungeoneering days.
Right. 13. Basically, I'm trying to see if from back in your dungeoneering days. Right.
Uh, 13.
Basically,
I'm trying to see if we should like explore like a little bit farther or if
like we should,
uh,
uh,
quit while we're ahead,
get out,
rest,
take this coin back to town before coming back and delving.
I will tell you this.
You feel as if you're in the center of the,
these,
uh,
so maybe, so maybe about halfway in.
Maybe.
And that's why there's a passageway leading in every direction,
so you get that sense.
How much bigger it is, you're not quite sure.
You would think probably not much bigger,
unless there was a really intricate series of underground tunnels built beneath this old church of Yom Kippur.
Which doesn't make sense.
But maybe somebody else took it over and started doing
something else, and that you don't know about. But your
general sense with a 13 is that
no, it's probably not that big.
Two things. One,
you feel like
this stuff in the
chest
is stuff that was like stolen
from Trinauans.
And then the last thing is
as that half-orc got closer to you
to attack,
you recognized him.
Tattoos?
I recognized him?
Lork, you recognized him.
You know who he is?
Who?
Well, I guess we'll have to find out next time.
Oh, fucking motherfucker!
Fuck you!
God damn it!
Fuck!
Fuck! Outro Music