The Glass Cannon Podcast - Giantslayer Episode 89 - Bottle of Red, Bottle of Wight

Episode Date: February 7, 2017

It's the Day of the Inheritor! As Sir Will celebrates all things Iomedae, he has some things to get off his chest to Della. Meanwhile, a foreboding sign at another crossroads may force the party to change course. For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. To become an official member of the Naish, subscribe today at http://www.jointhenaish.com. Want to be a part of Glass Cannon Nation? Follow us at twitter.com/glasscannonpod instagram.com/theglasscannon facebook.com/glasscannonnetwork tiktok.com/@glasscannonnetwork Get the best apparel and gaming accessories in the biz at https://glasscannonnetwork.com/store If you enjoyed this, we have several other series featuring Call of Cthulhu - Time For Chaos Delta Green - Get in the Trunk Pathfinder 2E - Glass Cannon Live! Strange Aeons Pathfinder 1E - Legacy of the Ancients Traveller - Voyagers of the Jump and so much more! Join us every Thursday night for Campaign Two of The Glass Cannon Podcast – a playthrough of the Pathfinder 2E Gatewalkers Adventure Path! Videos premiere on YouTube Thursday nights at 8PM ET with a companion podcast available at midnight. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on the Glass Cannon Podcast. This is gonna be something else, I'll tell you right now. It's time to leave the chapel behind. Back out into the valley. Back out into the valley. But not before Will has something to say. I want to do a little role play. I kind of imagine like...

You're a naughty nurse. All right. And Nestor needs a checkup. At the dawn of a new day. Yeah, so he wakes up sort of invigorated. He's like, it is a checkup. At the dawn of a new day. Yeah, so he wakes up sort of invigorated. He's like, it is a blessed day. A tough decision will be made. I don't think this is a right idea to go that way.

I'm going to vote for the other direction. Could be anything. Could be a weapon. It could be dangerous to charge. That's something we need to explore. Belle's like, wait here. And she casts Fly on herself. Oh.

And takes off into the air. What? But will it be the right one? I can't tell you how huge this is. This could get so bad so fast. The adventure gets terrifying. Now I know why the scarecrow was there. Right now.

What's going on, everybody? Troy LaVallee here, back again with another wild episode of the Glass Cannon Podcast. The GCP, if you're nasty. I don't have a whole lot to say today, for a change. Obviously, if you've been following our announcements, the GCP is coming to Gen Con 50. I am so excited. Joe was the first one to take me to a gaming convention. Oh, God, five years ago at this point, when I went to Paxi's was the first one to take me to a gaming convention Oh god, five years ago at this point When I went to Paxies for the first time

And then we've been back since And I cannot even imagine what it's going to be like When we get the whole crew out there With all of you guys that are coming We cannot wait And Joe announced last week We're going to be doing our first ever live show At the Geekery HQ

Right here in Astoria, Queens on Saturday, April 15th. I'm going to tell you right now, there are a ton more details to come out about what we're actually going to be doing about the after party at the bar across the street afterwards. That's right, there's an after party and what exactly is going to go down that day. But I'll tell you this, if you want to be a part of it, you're going to have to be here. So make your travel plans now. I don't even want to talk anymore because this next episode is so much fun, so delightful. So here she is, episode 89. Bottle of red, ooh, bottle of white, whatever kind of mood you're in tonight. Whatever kind of mood you're in tonight At a table near the street

On our old familiar beat You and I face to face Them crystals on fire Them crystals on fire So you found some fire crystals. There was a long debate. The guys were very gun-shy, but Sir Will just chip, chip, chip, chipping away.

I had a very clear image of this, and you cast light on him, and I just imagined the shadow making Will look much larger than he was. But it was really just a child. Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick. Trying to play with fire. Yeah, so you see these crystals in your hand that are just glowing with living fire within them.

You hold them up to your face and it illuminates the room in red flames licking off the walls and the shadows. Just raw red crystals. And you start to put two and two together and realize that those other ones must have been decoys. Decoys. Okay. Okay. So this is the true treasure. Enemies of the church may have known about these things and tried to steal them.

Possibly. I mean, they were obviously put back here for a reason, but other ones left out. Like, here are the geodes. Oh, let me check. Milky white pulsating. Oh, my God. As we said a couple weeks ago, they're coming through Naucon.

I wonder, looking at them peering over, I kind of go, Will, you're okay, right? Did you crack it open? Yeah, and he's just like, there seems to be some red crystals in here. And he's running his hands gently through it. And does he know anything about these or what they are or could be?

I mean, what check is it? You could do an appraise check, honestly, to find their worth. But otherwise than that, they appear non-magical. You're getting a strong evocation aura. And you still sense that, but it's just like holding magic in your hand. Its use is completely unknown to you. What was your appraise? 17 appraise. They're probably worth,

that harvest of that first one is probably worth a thousand gold pieces. Raw fire crystals. Somebody should do a spellcraft check on it. And what is their weight like? How big are they? Are they golf ball sized?

No, you crack open a coconut and you open it up and it's just like Stella will. And what is their weight like? Like how big are they? Are they loose? Are they golf ball size? No, you crack open a coconut and you open it up and it's just like a handful. Yeah, like how big are they? Like golf ball size? No, they're like... Each one's like a baseball? They're all different shapes and sizes, you know what I mean? They're not uniform in size, but you have like a handful of them and they're the size... You know, the largest one is probably the size of your fist.

A little bit bigger than your fist. Not your fist, Will. I was going to say, a man's fist? 27 on this book. You know that it probably has some purpose. It can be used for something, but you don't know what. Can I do an alchemy check on them to see if there could be an ingredient in something?

Yeah. Okay. 25. You don't get the sense that they're an ingredient per se, but between all of your spellcraft and your alchemy, just kind of trying to piece together what their use is, you feel like that they have a purpose beyond just being sold for gold. Well, we should hack open the rest of them and gather them up.

Oh, yeah, and just, yeah, that's what I think. At the very least, we can maybe use it, you know, in some sort of negotiation, intimidation, diplomacy with the Giants. Yeah, they may be very important to the Giants. Yep. So, yeah. Trade them for the hostages. I'd also like, before we

leave, to see if they have any reaction to the brazier as we walk out. Any reaction. So you come back out and hold that. We're going to finish whatever here. Sure, sure. Yeah, we take the rest.

Chip, chip, chip away at the rest. Same thing. More crystals in both of them. So now you have three bushels of raw red fire crystals. And they don't hold any weight per se. Now you have all these things. So you can just throw them in one of your

bags. But you know they're valuable, so you want to be careful with them and keep them away from Nestor. Nestor, hold these. And the evocation aura remains after we've done this harvest. We do. It kind of comes in and out.

But now it's emanating from the stones, not from where they were harvested from. Right, right. Got it. I think the only one that can be trusted with these are Lexington. Yes. Nestor does try to pocket one.

He already has the jewel of Highgarden riding on his back. How could you put any more So as you guys are doing it Nestor try a sleight of hand And everyone who's working on a world perception 30 Fail

I don't care if he takes it So Nestor He's like Nestor grabs a good sized crystal I's like, oh, yeah, I'll put it in. And Nestor grabs, you know, a good-sized crystal. I just, like, palm it and, yeah. Nice. Is this your card? Yeah.

All right. Skid, you want to play Umlo again this week? Sure. We could continue the trend of two to three episodes of Umlo. Yeah. That's how you really get in Umlo's skin. Get in his skin! All right.

So what do you guys want to walk back on? You want to hold these near the brazier? Yeah. Nothing. Nothing. Well, I guess should we check upstairs real quick and see what's up there? Sure. So if one of you goes up, Nestor goes up the first one and Sir Will and Della go up the second one. It's just empty, dusty, like it used to be used for sermons, maybe singing, chanting, or whatnot.

So if the priest or priestess led the charge up here, you go up there, maybe the deacons or whatnot were up there, acolytes. Roger deacons. Roger deacons, yes. And that's all you see. So that's it as far as you know, right?

So that's it? We're done? End of podcast. We did it, guys. But there is no unopened door. There is no area we haven't seen. There's nothing we haven't detected. Or we haven't detected anything else worth exploring. You were detecting evil and magic the whole time before you came in.

You went in that side door, explosion. You go to the altar, encounter. You find the secret in. You went in that side door. Explosion. You go to the altar. Encounter. You find the secret door. You find these geodes that are being hidden for a reason in a centuries dusty chamber. You go up. You look at the balconies. You look all around. You find bones. Nestor found the sapling rod.

This gigantic former chapel to Zer's Vader is otherwise empty as far as you know. Okay. It's nerve-wracking because it's such a big map, right? I recommend we camp the night here. Yeah, that's a good idea.

It is an enclosed area. It has fortifications. We can stay inside and get a peaceful rest. I agree. All right. Del, are you awake? Del is already sleeping. All right. Jello, your thoughts? Del is already sleeping. Classic Matthew.

For always the first to fall asleep. After she stitched her acid-burned clothing back together. I thought it was a fair question. Oh, yeah, remember the clothing? The tatters. Is there anything you guys want to do before you go to bed, or let's just go to bed and wake up a little here? Darren just says a prayer over the bones

that we now know were being offered as food to this flytrap creature. They were intruders, most likely. Yeah, and just says a prayer of vengeance towards Torag for them. Della will, before she falls asleep, cast Cure Light Wounds on herself and use

her last one. Ah, okay. Gives herself a little more cure. You want to burn off any channels there, Sir Will, before bed? Yeah. Yeah, I will burn off my last channel of the day. Give it... Oh, three ones.

Oh, I was going to say that before you even rolled it. So, three D6s? Three ones on three D6s. It's really not even funny. Those ones! That's ridiculous. I really enjoy how you, Joe, as a player,

have started to play characters who just have ridiculously high ACs. That's my only recourse. The one thing that can't be affected by my rolling. That's right. There's no randomness there staying alive uh us or will uh actually wants to i want to do a little role play um when we like as we're getting ready to sleep and stuff i kind of imagine like you're a naughty nurse all right and nester needs a checkup uh So he asks for

help from Umlo, and he takes off his armor fully and gets everything off. I imagine we build a little fire and we cook a little bit of food. And we sit around and eat. And at a certain point before Della goes to sleep, he kind of wants to

pull Della aside and say, Della, can I speak with you for a moment? And Della has her hair, like, very emo down in front of her face, and she's like, okay. Will is really kind of freaked out about what happened with

the flytrap, and he's very like, he almost lost her, you know, she kind of, like, got sucked into that thing and he tried to cast this command and, you know, luckily with the help of Nestor and Baron, she was saved but it just kind of reawoken in him this

sort of, this nervousness about how dangerous their mission is and with all the infernal healing that happened after that combat, it was like Umlo took it after the explosions of the geodes, and Della took it two or three times in a row, and he hasn't said anything, and he's just kind of watching it

because he knows how put off she was before. And he's been thinking a lot about it, and he wants to talk to Della, so he pulls her aside. And he just says, Della, I owe you an apology. Della kind of stiffens back and doesn't say anything. And he's looking up at her, you know what I mean? He's like a good foot or two shorter than Della. And he's looking up at her and he kind of tries to hold his head up high and he says, I've behaved rather childishly, as Nesta so graciously pointed out, and I think that perhaps I need to rethink some things.

Last night, I had a nightmare. I saw my family, my brother. I haven't told you this before, but I have three older brothers. One much older, Frederick, with children of his own. Another who is closer to me in age, but not in companionship. And then Benric. He and I were only a couple of years apart and grew up learning to fight together, much like you, I think. We were taught

the ways of martial combat like your father taught you. We took our lumps and we had to be ready to get back up. Back on the block, as my father used to say. I still remember the first time I beat

him. I beat him. I was thrilled. For years he'd bested me. He was so much bigger, you know. And when I'd finally exploited his weakness, I was overjoyed and so proud of myself. And then I beat him again. And again and again and again,

and that's when we started to realize that something was wrong. I suppose that's when I started to realize something was wrong. I'm sure my parents knew before they told us, but something was wrong with my brother. He was weak, a sickness perhaps, not of the mind, but of the body. Della, by this point, has sat down next to him. So they're kind of sitting down, like the firelight kind of glimmering behind, and he's sort of really opening up. He's trying to tell this story.

This illness was an insidious illness that lingered for many years. Lingers still. It doesn't seem to want to go away. For years, as we grew older and I grew stronger in my own small way, he grew weaker and weaker. Sometimes he would experience this great pain in his stomach, and for days on end, and then it would go away. For weeks and months at a time. It was so strange.

If it was a disease, we had no idea what it was. It couldn't be cured by the clerics of the Abbey. The clerics of Shalin and Yomadai that had been called on by my parents. And as you can imagine, my parents had no shortage of resources. They... I remember even once they reached so far out to pay handsomely for a cleric of Abadar from Corvosa to come all the way to Highbury to meet him, and still nothing. Nothing helped. He never got better.

And I just was overcome with guilt that he should be so weak of body when I was so strong. This, and he kind of hesitates for a second, tiny adopted halfling who had never experienced an illness. I'd never suffered from a disease. I can't even, I can't even remember the last time I had so much as a cold. Well, I vowed that if I was able-bodied enough to fight against the evil in this world, then I could no longer spend my time in the safety of Highbury Castle. Much to my mother's dismay, I enlisted in the Crusade, as I think you know, and I went to war fighting demons.

My brother still lives, as far as I know. It's been quite some time since I left, and I promise I'm getting to it. I'm sorry I'm talking so much. My brother Frederick has always said I don't know how to tell a short story. My brother still lives, and last night I saw something in a dream that made me realize how foolish I'd been

and perhaps how wise you have. It was the giants in this dream. They'd conquered the lands of men here, and even the hold of Belkson. They'd moved north to Neurossian and broke through the great walls. Of course, they came then to Highbury and crushed the great stone hall

like it was a children's toy. And Benric, I saw him there laying, laying helpless as they came through and killed everyone. I told you that I did not fear death and that I would rather die than use the means of evil, even to heal. But I'm realizing that is selfish. If I were to die here, now, at this time, when the storm tyrant least expects someone of my size to sneak behind his lines and dismantle his army from within, if I were to die, if we were to die, then how many more will die when the armies of the giants leave this valley? If I must use this infernal healing, loath that I am to do it, to keep me alive long enough to see this quest through, to exact justice on these giant villains, then I must. Did you know, Della, that in the old days, not long after the death of

Aradin, some followers of Yomadai believed that if you sheathed your blade in the old days, not long after the death of Aradin, some followers of Yomadai believed that if you sheathed your blade in the body of a virgin, the blood would turn your longsword into a demon-slaying magical weapon. I always thought it was barbaric nonsense, but some crusaders that I met, the ones that had many tours within the World Wound, believe it to this day,

swore that it worked for them. They would take any edge they could find to fight the horrors of the world wound, and who am I to judge them? Those that give their lives to keep the world safe. Della, she was really with you for a while, and then when you told her the story, she's visibly put off.

Do the virgins, do they sacrifice themselves, or are they just... Sometimes I don't believe they're willing. If the folk tales are true, even against their will, they could be sacrificed. But it was one death in the grand scheme of fighting the war of the demons.

I always thought it was horrible, just as I thought your infernal healing was. But think. Think about what you told me. How we must use any means necessary. I'm sorry for the way I reacted. That's all I want to say.

I understand why you did what you did, and I hope you understand why I'm doing what I'm doing. We are in this together, Della. And I will do whatever it takes to see this quest through. Whatever it takes.

You can count on me. Della nods, and she shakes his hand. She's like, I just think. There's a lot. If we can't see it, there's evil and good and good and evil. It's just a fast way to die. I'm with you, and I'll keep you alive for as long as I can.

Please do. And he kind of gets like a smile and like a light in his eyes as if he's been reinvigorated in this fight somehow in some strange way. And Nestor's standing behind Will. you didn't see him come up so sorry sorry mate startles he's so consumed in his thoughts i uh i don't i don't want to be rude but i did i did overhear a lot of what you said and he like gets down and like squats down and he looks him in the eye and he says, you claim that you are incapable

of telling a short story. Well, let me tell you, mate. Any story that you tell about yourself is by definition a short story. And he like claps him on the shoulder

and gets up and like goes back over and lies in his bedroll. And he cracks claps him on the shoulder, gets up and like goes back over and lies on his bedroll. And he cracks, Will cracks up. And Del pulls out the vial of demon blood. Demon's blood in one. Need some? Will looks at it and he's like,

there will be a time, I think. You just let me know. Puts it back, tucks it back away. Joe, you just earned yourself a bottle. Yeah! All right. I put a little thought in on that. That was good.

That was real good. Nice. I learned some stuff. That was great. That was awesome, man. Learned a lot about Will just then. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. And I think that tension between Will and Della, at least for now, maybe there'll be a pause in it.

Yeah, I mean, I liked the tension and everything, but it's been weeks that, as a player, I've been like, I don't want to not react to it. Right, Della almost just died twice in the past. Exactly, and so it's something he felt like he wanted to tell you, because we don't

know how much time we have left, and he wanted you to know that he understands why you did what he did and he's sorry about how he reacted. That was really the gist. And I think, I mean, Delia doesn't have ill will

towards Will because, I mean, again, she was acting to save his life and obviously the method was what he objected to,

but she still doesn't want him to die. I mean, she doesn't have that kind of attitude to her just because she doesn't see eye to eye with him. she doesn't want him dead. Also, as a team, you have

to hash these things out. We can't just continue with real tension without addressing it because we're acting in concerts. We have to rely on each other. We're comrades. In a really vicious situation.

A vicious war where we're behind the enemy deep in the territory, we have to trust each other. We have to. I can see Baron sitting in the back, smiling over this as he sharpens his gun. This team's coming together. Baron actually is happy about it, but he remembers kind of...

He understands now that he couldn't have made Will get to this conclusion himself when he brought up Inquisitors before and that they use any means necessary to get to it at the end. But what he's thinking inside of his head is that maybe and this is all internal, maybe Will, he's afraid that Will may have gone too far in the other direction and course adjusted and the point that he would use any means necessary so the quote that's in baron's head right now is beware that when fighting monsters you yourself do not become a monster

for when you gaze long into the abyss the abyss gazes also into you. It's a fine line. And he clacks his gun and puts it away. Especially considering the abyss, how that is the home of the demons. That's where the demon's word comes from. It comes from the abyss. I think treading that line is going to be something that all four characters are going to be dealing with

throughout the adventure. And how appropriate for you to have this conversation with Della, because I've said now for a while that I've been keeping track of the days, and I just haven't shared it with you, I certainly haven't shared it with the fans, and I just, I didn't start doing it at the beginning of book one, so at the beginning of book three,

I arbitrarily picked a day at the end of what would be August in Galarian, and it just so happens, as you wake up today, the sun streaming in through the holes in the ceiling, it is the Day of the Inheritor. Oh! It is Yomadai's holiday.

And a Yomadai holiday. It's a Yomadai holiday. I happen to know what that is, actually. The Day of the Inheritor? Yeah. Please enlighten us. It's very simple. It celebrates, like as I had said last night,

after the death of Aradin back in the day. Because Yom and I was one of his most stalwart supporters, right? Well, she was one of his... Oh, she was one of the ascendants. She was like a herald of Aradin or something. But did she ascend from the Starstone? Yeah, she was immortal that ascended. She took the trial. But she was below Aradin, essentially Yeah, she was immortal. Yeah. That ascended. She took the trial.

But she was below Aroden, essentially, who was the god of humans. And the god of humans died under very mysterious circumstances. Nobody knows if he really is dead, but his clerics have no power anymore. All that stuff. It's a huge point of change in the world, in the Galarian world. It was like 100 years ago. Yeah, it was about 100 years ago. The equivalent of 1906 compared to our time.

Yeah, that would be 110 years ago. The equivalent of 1906 compared to our time. 110 years ago. Isn't the, like we have AD and BC, isn't the calendar based on like before the fall of Aroden and after the fall of Aroden? Yeah, it's Aroden Reckoning. No, it's not the fall of Aroden. It's when he rose the star stone. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Aroden Reckoning. So, and it's been almost 5,000 years since that. So he basically, when Aroden died, the Day of the Inheritor celebrates when the humans that worshipped Aradin came over to Iomidae. So Iomidae had become a goddess and didn't necessarily have a huge

human following. And then the humans came over. So that is something that... The former worshippers of Aradin kind of were like, eh, I guess we'll go to Iomidae. Well, some of them went the other way too. Some of them were like, because Aroden is neutral. He's not a good aligned god.

He's neutral. So some of them went the evil way. Some of them went to like lawful evil, Asmodeus sort of stuff. And some of them went the good, lawful good way to Yomadai. So the night, you know, that's something that Will

definitely would have said to Della. You know, it's like tomorrow is a holiday, the day of the Inheritor. And it was a big celebration in my family for the humans where it's the day that the humans celebrate becoming followers under Yom Adai, for they had no God. And the ones that wanted to do good in this world went that way. And I think if you're a follower of Yom Adai, you're supposed to give your GM a present. A present. You are more than welcome, Jeff. There's Rutherford Lee Hayes. your GM a president. A present. You are more than welcome to our current president, if you like.

Well, happy day of the inheritor, Will. Yeah, so he wakes up sort of invigorated. He's like, it is a blessed day. You know what I mean? Like his somber mood from last night. He feels like a weight has been lifted. And he gets up early and he works out.

He's excited to continue. Runs downstairs, opens his presents. You know, the day of the inheritor is perfect though for our current president considering the mass amount of wealth he inherited from his father. That's true. Boom. So, new day. Chapel

is clear as you're going to clear it it was a nice night spent with all those skulls the verdant tangles do you guys want to set off and go back to the main road as it were back out into the valley

is there more stuff heading east like is there your course so far has been like east and any the valley. Back out into the valley. Is there more stuff heading east? Oh, yeah. Your course so far has been like east and any opportunities to go north, you take north. And then if there's nothing there, you keep going east and take all the north.

Do you want to continue in that fashion? You only skipped maybe one thing going south. I keep on thinking about that one passageway that looked like it was hard to pass it was difficult for one person that was the southerly one and i i know it's may not be quite as relevant because giants probably couldn't have gone through there but i wonder if it's a shortcut to someplace

else but i mean i'm up to following whatever else the rest of the party wants i'm good with just continuing east. Okay. By the way, I should tell you, I spent an arcane pool point this morning. Oh, really? Interesting. This is your knowledge pool? My knowledge pool, yeah. And this is going to give you a spell that you're not going to tell me you're going to surprise me with. Exactly. I thought that'd be

fun. We're having fun. We're having fun. I'd like to go east, too. Alright, so you guys want to go east? Do you want to continue, like, anytime you see north, keep going north? Or do you want to continue Like anytime you see north Keep going north Or do you want to Take it as it comes Yeah I think That's safe to say for now

I mean Yeah Obviously it's You see a giant drop off And a huge cliff Right Well we just keep going north We promise

We gave our word To keep going You don't break your word On the day of the inheritor Assuming We all die Assuming We're hurtling off a cliff It's like Wile E. Coyote style world on the day of the inheritor assuming we all die assuming hurtling off it's like

wily coyote style like floating in midair assuming that there's no other changes then i'll say you're going that way so you guys set off and you go south now to get back to the you know the

the main way you were going and you find it and you're following a stream all the way there and then the stream continues east. Are there any hints on our map, our geode map, as to where any of this

leads? No. We haven't checked in on that in a while. The geode map just led to the mouth of Mineral Spell. It stops here. It stopped there. That's all it took. Oh, before we get too far, can I try to spellcraft that bag again? Oh, sure. You guys want to do some spellcrafting? Yeah, new day, a new spell

craft. 18. Nope. 18 for me, too. 22 from Baron. That'll do. Yeah! There we go. It is a bag of holding, as you assumed. Yes. And it is a type... it is a

type 5 bag of holding. Whoa. Whoa. So the bag itself weighs 100 pounds. Oh no. But it can contain up to 2,500 pounds. Oh my. Because it's a giant bag of holding. Yeah. Type 5.

But it weighs 100 pounds. I don't know if we can even take that. We can put it on Reginald. Oh, there we go. Yeah. Like the saddle bag? Yeah, We can put it on Reginald. Oh, there we go. Yeah. Like a saddlebag? Yeah, we'll strap it to Reginald. Yeah, and Reginald will literally just be a pack horse. Basically.

Yeah. Well, I mean, somebody could take it and they could load all of their equipment into it and they would get rid of all of that weight because it would just... Probably have to be... With that belt of heavy load, you could probably take it, right, Baron? I have the muleback cords from... Oh, yes. You should know that retrieving anything from the giant bag of holding is a full round action. If you ever want something in combat.

Baron, high on his own hot spellcrafting, says, Gentlemen, regard the silver pendant granted to me by the Alderwoman of Shinemon's Fortune. Ah, yes. I would like your assistance in determining its worth. And he rolls his own spellcraft, and hopefully he doesn't need any help. That is a 17. It is a brooch of shielding. What is that?

Well, I'm glad you asked As I stall while my iPad brings it up Thank you for asking that Grant That was a very good question It is a You know a piece of Jewelry just to fashion a cloak Or a cape but in addition to this mundane

Task it can absorb magic Missiles of the sort Generated by the spell or spell-like ability. A brooch can absorb up to 101 points of damage from magic missiles before it melts and becomes useless. So anytime you get hit by magic missiles, just keep track. And once it uses up 101 points of it, it's useless. Wow, that's very awesome. It's cool. You know, it's only a first.

So when, really, when Della turns on Baron. Yep. Right. Yeah. He's gonna be set. But Della spellcrafted too, so she knows not to do that. Della, do you have a brooch of bullet shielding? I do not. A brooch of Kevlar? We could throw it to our enemies

to even the odds. Yeah, catch! That would be such a baller move to be like, you're going to need this. I'll spot you one brooch of shielding. Before we leave the cathedral, Della actually would like to, near the door,

she's going to cast Arcane Mark and leave kind of like a rune that's our symbol, the symbol of our party. The true now four. Yeah. Awesome. A big four.

Just to mark it. I like that. What about me? I don't count at all, do I? She casts again, does a little second rune that says, end of rune. And taking his lead in a much more mundane way,

Will will carve the Sunburst Longsword of Yomadai. Just, like, mark it on the wall. It's not going to obviously carve, but, like, mark it on the wall that a follower

of Yomadai was here. You want to put Torag up there as well? Sure. I've been graffiting all over this whole place. I was going to say that multi-denominational

priest from Shinemon Sports would love this. Except everybody. Adela will do Desna in Glabris's honor. We're really going to spruce up the place.

The butterfly in Glabris's honor. Now where do I put the video screens? This is a great place. A bit of a fixer-upper. All right. And so off you go

continuing east. You get about a half a mile up the way and you see a passageway to the south. You can see the ending of it. Doesn't seem to be anything there. Another mile a mile up the way And you see a passageway to the south You can see the ending of it Doesn't seem to be anything there Another mile or so up the way

You see another passage south Again, you can see the ending of it But you've ignored all the southerly passages so far I'll assume you're doing the same And then you continue Even further at this point You've gone probably Well, from leaving the chapel

You've gone maybe ten miles just trudging along and Sir Will is the only one on a mount right now, Reginald bearing the weight of a giant bag of holding. We didn't do that. You didn't do that. Baron took it, didn't he? Yeah, Baron has it.

Oh, okay. And soon the valley opens up And you can see a passageway going straight south It's wider than the ones that you've seen A passageway that's going north and turning around And then the valley continues going east And maybe like a little bit south

But east Okay Perhaps the valley curves back south and around Onto itself I believe we shall continue north, Nestor, yes? Yeah, yeah We've had much luck heading north and east So far And the Inheritor is with us today

Wouldn't you agree, Nestor? Oh, yeah, no, it's like a holiday, right? It is, it's the day of the Inheritor Oh, great, well Happy day to you then, my little friends Thank you so much Let's do, it's the day of the inheritor oh great well happy day to you then my little friends thank you so much let's do it's your day you pick whatever you want Baron just wants to a quick

survival check before we follow that way to look for tracks sure 22 nothing of any important got it it so you go north and it's like a pretty wide valley that eventually gets to a point

and just ends nothing so it ends in a cliff wall a cliff face cliff wall cliff face just a point

okay one extra perception around the area cliff face itself ooh 20 even

26 nothing nothing and nothing. So it's just another dead end. So it takes a couple hours. It takes probably like an hour and a half to get back to where you guys were. Oh, wow. And then, you know, you continue

following along the water. And you follow along the water and eventually the valley splits into like a sideways V. A greater than symbol, we'll say. There's a passage continuing north.

Okay. Probably north-easterly. And then there's another passage to the far southeast. Roll a perception check. Oh, 22! 22. 20. 21. 17. 21. 17.

21. Nestor and Sir Will notice what looks like a statue towards the opening in the southeast. The river, or the stream rather, that you're following splits and one goes to the northeast V, one goes towards the southeast portion. But there seems to be a statue in the southeast and the entrances are about a mile apart do you want to continue north do you want to go to the

south do you want to inspect i'd like to inspect this yeah i'm a bit intrigued by that statue so i say we break our vow sorry to do it on your special day. And go south and just check it out. I see you guys are following this here. Just to show you a visual, you're moving along like this following the stream. You go a little bit north, point dead end. So you come back, and now you continue going east, but you notice that the valley is starting to go a little bit southerly. There's a passage going straight south.

You go past that and come to this opening here. Part of it's going north. Part of it's going south. You go to inspect the statue. As you get closer and closer to it, you realize it's not a statue at all, but it looks like

a giant scarecrow. About 20 feet tall or so. Whoa! Crudely formed from tree trunks, lashed together. It's like the Wicker Man. And it stands to the entrance of this southeast passage that is forest.

So, it's a forested vale. On either side of the passage, steep rocky escarpments climb sharply towards the sky. Clinging boulders jut from the slopes, entwined by the thick roots of twisted ash trees, determined to hold themselves fast. As you guys approach, just to make it extra eerie, a cold wind comes through the valley, hits the ash trees, and it looks like a blizzard of snow as the ash falls down upon the ground. Wow. Ash is probably a good sign considering we're tracking a dragon. Is there a check that can be done to tell what kind of creature this scarecrow was intended for? Birds? Drakes? Dragons? Anything else that flies? Any type of pest?

That's a good question. Roll a knowledge local check. 16. 16. 19 for me. Neither of you know. 26. Vadella comes up and looks at it.

Because Baron brings up the idea, what's the point of this thing Nestor comes up I don't know stupid Della comes up and looks at it and realizes that it is a warning to other giants not to go this way

ah well you know what we are not is it other giants we are not giants so especially Will gangway as usual you have many options

I mean yeah that's a conundrum we're still trying to track the I should tell you it's getting darker now because you lost some time going up to that dead end. It's getting darker at night. The sun is coming down. It's beautiful but eerie.

Well, I've got to say, anywhere that the giants don't want the giants to go, I'd like to see. Can I do... Oh, I'm sorry. Was the check done on the scarecrow? Yeah. Okay. And the boulders. There's boulders that are being held up by

the roots of trees on the cliffside? Yep. So does it seem like they could be trapped? You don't get that sense. Like the roots seem to really hold the boulders fast. They wouldn't sweep into the valley. Yeah, you don't get that sense. But it is thick forest ahead,

whereas you really haven't seen a lot of trees. There's trees growing usually on the slopes that are a little more, that have more flat portions before they climb up to the sky. But in front of you, down this dale, is all trees. Or I should say thickly. Will, emboldened by Nestor's casual confidence, will kind of turn to Della and be like, We are giant hunters, aren't we? But there are no giants this way.

Wasn't it put up by giants telling other giants to stay out? Yeah, and presumably that meant there's something they don't want that way, right? No, I'm thinking it's a tribe of giants that is trying to keep other giants out. I think it's a warning

to other giants not to go down there lest they be endangered by something far greater than a giant's strength. Oh, but look, I mean, it might be, there could be anything. It could be a weapon. It could be dangerous to giants. I want to keep people away. That's something we need to explore, I say. Every day we lose.

Those Shinnerman's Fortune people are closer to death. Yeah, I know, but I don't really care about them well I do I know you do but I mean that's that's the crux of the argument but I mean I really honestly and I'm being

honest here I really just want to kill giants as many as I can and there's so I mean that's my vote I've said my place and you do what you want you always do

so Nestor really didn't need the passive aggressive cut at the That's my vote. I've set my pace and you do what you want. You always do, so... Nesta, I really didn't need the passive-aggressive cut at the end. We are trying our best to be a full group here and I believe your opinion is very much so respected. All right, well, I appreciate that. And I understand what you're saying here and I believe, yes, that we are here to hunt giants. We are here to kill giants, and perhaps

these survivors of Shinemon's fortune, they were given to the dragon, weren't they not? Yeah. The drake or the dragon, whatever they said, and perhaps this warning is for giants to stay away from the dragon. Could be. Perhaps the dragon took the prisoners this very way. Yeah, they could be right there on

round the bend. they could be right there Hello, we're a bunch of people, footless people And then we drag them back to, you know, whatever The truth is we know very little And we must go with our instincts, Della Exactly, your instincts warn you against this path Della's like, you're absolutely right We do know very little

Wait here, and she casts fly on herself Oh And takes off into the air What? Where is she going? Della Oh. And takes off into the air. What? Where is she going? Della casts Fly and takes off in the air, going... She wants to kind of get high up so she can do surveillance around the area.

Okay. And then, you know, next round she will vanish herself. Okay. So you fly up and roll a perception check. 15. While vanished, vanished lasts for how long? 12 seconds. Right?

Oh, no, no, you're sixth, seventh level now? I'm seventh level. Yeah, so it lasts for seven rounds, so 30 or 40. 42 seconds. 42 seconds. You fly up in the air. When you feel you're at a comfortable height, you vanish. And you vanish just in time because you see three drakes flying around.

Oh. Hunting for prey. And there's a rift drake in there as well. Oh, wow. And that's from like over the area where they said giants don't go? No, it's just like over the area in general. Like you feel like if you don't land right now, you're going to get attacked by three rift drakes. So Del immediately, and do I

see anything out? Sorry, what cardinal direction are they in? They're like up in the sky, like hunting. But you look down and you just see the tops of trees and the stream that cuts between the path. But yeah, you... So they're moving over wide swaths of the valley.

They're hunting. So Della immediately turns around, flies back down, appears to them, and says, We need to get to cover immediately. Immediately. Whoa. What? But it's like Lexington. We must get to cover immediately.

Is there a... We'll get to cover immediately. Baron, there's no time for this. Are we in cover? Baron's like, wait, wait, wait, wait. There's no time for your role play. Let's think about this. Once we're in cover, are we in cover? Is there was like, wait, wait, wait. There's no time for your role play. Let's think about this. Once we're in cover, are we in cover?

Is there a tree nearby we can hide in? So you're going to go into the valley, into the trees? Like the first set of trees you see right there? Yeah, sure. Okay, so you guys just run in cover and you're watching. It was more like you went up there, you looked down, and you saw the tops of trees. You couldn't get a sense.

And you can see the valley curbs. It keeps going down, down, down to the south. There's so many trees you can't quite get a grip on what's there. But when you went up, you realized there are drakes in the area. Obviously, one of them attacked you already. So it's probably drake nests all the way up in these cliffs. And so,

had you not gone down, you would have been attacked and most likely killed. Great. Is there a knowledge check I can do to determine a way outside of staying underneath trees to avoid detection of drakes as we travel? I already tried to cover myself in giant's blood at some point to throw them off our scent,

but I'm just trying to find a way to not fight rift drakes, especially since we still don't have a good way to get them grounded. Sure. I mean, I can just tell you, you just roll a wisdom check. You're wise. 17. 17.

You probably don't want to fly. You probably don't want to go snooping around in nests. But otherwise, you know, there's nothing you can do. There's nothing you can do snooping around in nests. But otherwise, you know... There's nothing you can do. There's nothing you can do. You're in the wild. All right. They could come at any moment.

It's a scary proposition. Yeah. And you saw what one did. Right. Della just had three. Was one of them drakes that you saw, did it look familiar at all? Like the one that ran off?

Yes. Because I'd love a second shot at that one. At least one was definitely a rift rake. The other two you couldn't quite tell. No, but was it the one? I didn't take a minute to look at its features, if that's what you're asking. Well, did it have huge gaping wounds all over its body? Did it?

Not that you could tell. Not that I could tell. Well, I'd love to take another fucking shot at that thing can i ask you a question esther yeah please ask away have all the things that you said you wanted to kill are they all dead at this point so far but uh i still have ambitions so you know i can't you know i'm still hungry you know, I can't, you know, I'm still hungry, you know. This conversation is all happening in the trees. Yeah, yeah. And Will is just looking up the whole time.

Like, he is literally, I'll tell you what he's scared of. He's very confident in himself and in his size. He thinks it is an advantage. He loves it. He's imagining how easy it would be to just get swept right off of Lexington and just carried away. Like, he's looking around so scared because it's like he wouldn't be able to control that. It would be so easy. It would be so easy.

And he can't move much. He can't dodge in his heavy armor. You know what I mean? So he's, like, really freaked out by the idea of the swoop down and take you away for a meal. Like, really freaking him out. and take you away for a meal. Like, really freaking him out. My concern in character is that this might be the way to the aforementioned dragon's lair,

and that thing is the only thing that is strong enough to scare giants away. And I don't know if we want to directly creep into their lair. Or it could be set up to just keep them away from these drakes. Right, yeah. But there isn't some trees suggest... Well, I don't know. Della, I think, is now more inclined to go this way considering the other way was out in the open and that would put us at greater risk.

And the other thing to consider, too, is you have been out in the open the whole time and only got attacked once, but those are your options. You can go down this way into the forest area, or you can go back up north, or you can go back and try other stuff. I say we put it to a vote. As a player, I'm concerned that Skid has two votes. I say we put it to a vote Can Umlo serve as vice president

And only break ties? He's president pro tempore, so We go to the south Or we continue our exploration of the north What is it? We know Nesta's vote Nesta, I'm voting with you on this Yeah, I like to take out these drakes

I don't like them I think you should all know That I like to take out these drakes. I don't like them. I think you should all know that I have no fear of these drakes. See, that's what it is. He's a brave little man. Light, just light. Sense motive.

He's shaking in his arms. So much courage. So that's two for the South. Sheriff. I don't think this is a right idea to go that way. I'm going to vote for the other direction. Oh, this is funny. Two south, one north.

Della, what say you? We've been going north this whole damn time, and it is the feast of whatever they inherit or hail, or Yomadab bullshit. Della, perhaps. That's extremely offensive. On any other day, I might smirk. I like to call her the whore in the sky. I'd like to change

my vote. Anyway, Nestor isn't going. I call her the whore in the sky. No, that's what I thought that was her name. I thought that was like an honorific. I thought it was an honorific going up. That is how you pronounce an I in front of an O, right? Exactly.

All right, let's Della. Della, perhaps both scared by the rift rake and maybe swayed by Will's story last night, votes to go with Will and Nestor. Yeah, it's unanimous. We're going. So I'm low voted with Nestor, I'm guessing. I'm always just like, I'll go i was just like i'll go whatever you like

i'll do whatever you like can i make you some eggs would you like some scotch eggs i'm not paying for them that's good so off you go uh towards this southeasterly way sir will question i want to ask a question yeah that thing that we that we got, the tree. I mean, I know it was like to stay alive, but wasn't there a survival check that could tell us something else besides just how to stay alive? The sapling rod? Yeah, the sapling rod thing that we got. Wasn't there some one added element? Plus five.

Plus five to survival checks to not get lost. To not get lost. Yeah, yeah. I don't know if it was like for finding water or something like that. How long does the tree take to grow? An hour. So you can plant it now and come back later, whoever's still alive. I don't know if it was like for finding water or something like that. How long does the tree take to grow? An hour. So you can plant it now and come back later, whoever's still alive. I don't want to lose it, though.

Well, now, doesn't that take a week? No, no. It loses its powers for a week. No, you can only do it once per week, but it grows in an hour. And you eat the fruit. You have lesser restoration. And then you can do it again one week later. And cure moderate wounds.

This would be great if you were still in True Now. You could plant the tree, go to the plague house, interview a couple people. Yeah, totally. Take a cure moderate, then do some other stuff, come back,

do lesser restoration. So cool. Okay. Silvermane is watering the ground next to it. He's not quite hitting it. It's more complicated. It can bloom once per week and as soon as it blooms,

it reverts back to its rod form. Yeah. Right. Yeah, we had that. Well, but that's the thing. It's like you plant it, wait an hour, pick the fruit, and then take one pocket of it. And then you walk it away again, but you can't use that ability for another week. Now, let me ask you this.

You guys chose the southeast. You start walking down thickly populated with trees. The stream runs just like it has the entire time you've been going, right through the middle of this valley. There are trees on either side and a little footpath on either side of the river. Do you guys want to be on the left side of the river? The right side?

I say river. It's a stream. It's probably 10 feet, 15 feet wide at its widest point. Left side, right side, or half and half? Left. I'll vote for left. I vote we all stay together. So left it is.

And as long as we stay within 20 feet of each other, we all have woodland stride. Yeah, that's a good thing. So I would like to... The formation I would like is to have Nestor, or whomever wants to be in front, and Will in the back. Okay.

Are you guys straight lining it or two by two? I think we two by two so we can stay within 20 feet easily. Nestor and Della up front. Nestor and Della. Okay, Nestor and Della. And they've got the dwarves together. The dwarves in the middle, the hardy dwarves in the middle. And then the little guy in the back,

just in a perfect place to be snatched by a drake. Yeah, because he doesn't want them to see his face while it's like snapping around in the sky frantically Sweat beading down his temples Out of nowhere, Baron pulls a drake call out of his pocket It starts frantically pointing at Will It's not funny, Baron It's not funny

So, you see this scarecrow Made out of tree trunks to resemble a giant Della realizes that it's to keep giants out, made by giants tell giants don't go this way you guys follow the stream on the left side of it, trees everywhere

and it's getting darker and darker and darker and eventually night falls the only sounds you hear are the sounds of, like, maybe some woodland creatures. Like that. Like that, for example. And the rush of the stream, the mountain stream. It's very, very eerie.

Not only because it's night and it's dark, you don't know where the hell you're going, but also because there's more trees here than you've dealt with. And so you feel even more closed in. It's one thing to be closed in by these sloping mountains that go all the way up to the sky. It's another thing to have these trees because you don't know what's in them. Well, sure enough, there is something in them. Because at one point you hear like... I'd like to roll a perception check.

I'll save you that perception check, because out of the trees come one, two, three, four giant creatures. Oh my god. Like, flames shooting out of their eyes, their skin basically falling off them. So bad. And they just come like lumbering out and they look like this. Oh my god! Roll for initiative.

Now I know. Now I know why the scarecrow was there. They're saying they're zombie giants down here. Zombie giants, apparently. They sure are, fellas. They sure are. Oh, baby! Four bloated, rotting giants come out of the marsh, reeking of death. Reeking of death!

This is going to be something else. I'll tell you right now. Baron, for his part, wanted to go north. Alright, who's over 20? 30. Of age. 30 for Nestor.

Natural 20. Wow, okay. 27 for Baron. Oh, come on. You guys should be playing wizards or bards. Alright. Or what we are playing. You guys should be playing wizards or bards. All right. Or what we are playing. Or what you are playing.

Della? 12. 12. And a 13 for Will. And what about old Umlo? 11. 11. All right.

You guys appropriately get the jump on these. You'd think they'd be slow lumbering creatures, but they come out of the woods very fast. Now look at the way I've drawn it here. You're hemmed in by the valley. I probably could have given you a little more room in the valley there, but what's done is done. The stream you can walk through. It's not difficult terrain

or anything. At this point, the stream is very, you can just walk through it normal without losing any movement speed. Alright. All right. Round one. Nestor. And remember, it is dark out for my humans. All right.

So I assume that being – assuming that they're undead, that they are not subject to persistent damage, sneak damage, right? If they are undead, yeah, I think you can crit undead. You can crit undead. You can crit undead, but I don't know about sneak attack. I don't think sneak damage. Yeah, I think you can. Really? Yep. Yeah, we thought they couldn't, and I believe that, yeah, you can absolutely

do it. I'm looking at undead traits right here, and it doesn't say that, so you're okay. Undead traits are usually like they're immune to electricity or something weird like that. I think they're immune to electricity or something weird like that. I think they're immune to mind affecting effects. They're immune to a lot of stuff, but not precision. But not straight up damage. It does not say precision damage.

All right. Don't go Googling undead traits. All right, so Nestor's going to many shots, pull two arrows out, and fire them at the giant across the stream from him. Weird white giant comes out. Skin falling from it. And he studied him and that's a 30 to hit.

And that is a 10-20% mischance. And I make it. Micah's nester doesn't have dark vision so he still hits it. 35 points of damage. Wow! All right.

Next attack? Second attack. Oh, natural one. No! Oh, no! Well, nobody's in melee yet. Nobody's in melee. But don't fumble.

Let's see if it's a fumble. It's against his flat-footed AC, which I don't know if that helps. They're not very dexterous. 17. No fumble. Jeez. Okay. By a pubic hair.

Oh, man. Okay. Okay. Wow. The whole room is just like, rip Drake all over again. No. And I've shuffled the fumble deck too, so I could get that card again if I pulled it out.

I was going to say, you probably ripped it up and threw it out. Oh, I should have. Baron, you're up. Nestor got a good hit on one of them. Baron is going to, as a swift action, enact his first judgment. Oh, Judge Dredd!

The judgment, and just like Judge Dredd, he's going to talk to his gun and give it the judgment of sacred smiting. Yes! Talk to me. Grant's got some splaining to do. That will bathe the double-barreled pistol in divine light. And my weapons

will count as magic for the purposes of bypassing DR. And it will count as a good weapon for the purpose of bypassing. Okay. Nerdy! You're such a nerd. Everybody check out the nerd. Who brought the nerd?

Chess nerd. Baron's going to take a five foot step towards the giant. Which one? There are four. The one that has her shot. Okay. And he is going to do three shots at him. All right.

Nice. Shot number one. Take him out. Take him down. Almost a misfire. Almost. That is a Sorry 14 against touch AC

Hit Yes This gun Minimum damage 11 points of damage 11 points of Second attack Drake's won't hear that gunshot

That's a hit Do they do night feedings? 14 points of damage And the first Marsh white Falls Oh Marsh white I used the mud elemental Pawn Did you notice? 14 points of damage. And the first Marsh White falls. Oh, nice.

Marsh White. I used the mud elemental pawn. Did you notice? All right. Do you have a shot left in that? Yeah, I have one more against the other guy. Did you just take another five-foot snap? No, no, no.

He was counting his squares. All right, so you got one more guy over there. The other guy on the other side of the river. If he has the same touch AC, it's a hit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 13 points of damage. 13 points of damage on... You know what?

I'm going to give him a real creative name. I'm going to call him Three. All right, Sir Will. Trying to name your creature so you can get the crit cards. Yeah! Know your game. Name's Three. Sir Will is going to...

Whoa, he's going to... 13, you said, Barry? Yes. Sir Will is going to turn Lexington toward the creature that Baron just shot. It's like... And yeah, and when a paladin of all people sees undead, I mean, that is... Yeah, this is your bread and butter. Talk about an offensive just attack on the Day of the Inheritor.

This is an affront to your god. Yes, yes it is. And to decency itself. He is going to turn toward it. He is going to say, you've chosen the wrong day, white, and smite evil. Right, he's still right. As a swift action. He's going to smite evil As a swift action

And then he's going to lower his lance And charge ride by attack Through the stream Slashing on the water And since it's undead I've never done this yet with Will I don't think I've ever done this with any character When you smite evil and it's undead

Your first attack against it Your bonus damage is doubled. And that's on top of the charging damage, which is triple. Okay. So he's going to lower the, I mean, this is the exact sort of target you want. And you're going right into the tree line. I'm going right into the tree line. Yep.

So can I continue the charge into the far? Well, no, we have that thing. I'll be more than 20 feet away. I won't have woodland stride. Yeah. So, um... You're gonna be able to go far enough. It gets so thick in there. So it's like 5 feet or so I have to stop. Yeah.

Basically, if you don't kill it, it'll be able to attack you next round. Okay, then I will aim to kill it in one tilt! For Highbury! For Highbury! Okay! 29 to hit. That is a hit.

And he does... 44 points of damage. And you kill the one. Yes! Smoten from the heavens. I can't tell you how huge this is. On the day of the Inheritor. No less.

This could get so bad so fast. So make these attacks count. That was 3d6 plus 33. Oh my god. I think minimum damage might have killed it. Question for you too.

I don't know what wights are but do they have to roll will against Umla's armor? They would have to. They're undead. armor uh they would they're undead yeah i think they're undead so no yeah maybe not yes that's a might exactly right thank you uh all right della make it count uh della is going to move uh back towards where will charge okay her full movement and then she's going to cast a zero level mega spell oh these always work uh she's gonna come this way.

Yeah, in the middle of a huge combat. Let me guess, press the digitation? Disrupt undead. Oh! Talk to me, Matthew. So I make a ranged touch attack, and then I deal 1d6 points of damage. Alright, pretty slow. While I get out of the way,

that's gonna be a hit. Alright. 25. 25 is a hit. All right. 25. 25 is a hit. And you take three points of damage. Hey, there you go. It counts. Nice. I love when you can use a zero level spell

and have it do something. Yeah. And that was against the one, what I'm calling one. Yes. That's correct. This lumbering marsh white comes out. All right, Della.

Umlo. Umlo. Umlo. All of you rolled higher initiative than the whites. There's a marsh white at the tree line right behind him.

So he turns around with... And he's like, I don't like these, you know, giants that are like used to be dead and now they're not.

I can't think. It's very late. But being that it is the day of the Inheritor, I think it's proper that I put you back in your grave. Right, Will? Will shouts from the trees about 50 feet away. I couldn't agree more! Right, see?

And he knows what he's talking about, so... Oh, no! Oh, no! Save for Highbury! Oh, for... For Highburn... Highburnies. For the Hibernians. Oh, shit.

15. 15 misses. Flat-footed, okay. Plus two, plus... Flat-footed, that's right. You get the plus two for... Oh, shit. 15. 15 misses. Flat-footed. Plus two. Flat-footed. You get the plus two for didn't you? Oh, yes. And plus two for...

That is a hit. Yes. Okay, cool. Steal this yet to crit with Heart Spit. I know. Heart Spit. Heart Spit. 12 points of damage.

Okay. And then the two... Oh, and then... Yeah. And then 15. 15 damage total. Okay, so another three for the 2d6. Yep.

Boom. And then second attack, 20. 20 is a hit. 12 points of damage. All right. Now I get to play. Now you've taken two of my two of my very, very dangerous creatures

out of the fight. But there are two left. The first one attacks Umlo with a slam. Alright. I'll attack Umlo because if this hits, you'll realize why they're so bad.

Natty's 16. Oof. Hits Umlo. Miss. Hits Umlo for 14 points of damage. And Umlo starts to feel very weak as he loses an entire level. Oh, no. With energy drain. Oh, no. That's why he could an entire level. Oh, no! With energy drain.

Oh, no! That's why it could get so bad. That's why it could get so bad. Yeah, wights, that's right. Wights have always had level drain. And it gains power from Umlo, as it sucks power out of Umlo in that touch, so it gains some hit points back.

And I'll tell you something. The Negative levels remain until 24 hours have passed or until they are removed with a spell, such as Restoration, which you do not have. If a negative level is not removed before 24 hours have passed, the affected creature must make a Fortitude save with a very high DC. It's like 25. On a success, negative level goes away.

On a failure, it is a permanent negative level. And Umlaut's already a level down from the rest of us. This could cripple Umlaut. One more white steps up and... That's me. He goes after Nestor. The two guys

who have the ability drain of damage! It just happened to be the way they were standing. Alright. Goes to Slam Nester. 23. Exactly. That's what you said. You take 15 points of damage. And, oh, excuse me.

You guys get a save. I was like, there's got to be some sort of save on this. So roll a... Fortitude. It's got to be Fortitude, yeah. Roll a Fortitude save. Natural 20. 27 for Nestor. Oh, thank God.

You know what I realized? A natural 20 on a save is always a success. Yes. And a 1 is always a failure. So, umlo. Oh, 13. Umlo failed. Poor umlo. Huge save by Nestor, though. I was like, this kid just every hit do an energy level, but it's a pretty tough Fortitude save.

Natural 20 will do it. Round two. Nestor. Kill that thing before it takes more of, uh, Umlo. Okay. Nestor will take a five foot step back. And take a shot, and he will hit, uh, with his many shots,

and we'll see. Oh. Yes. Okay, he hits him, gets past the concealment, and here we go. So you can imagine dark. These creatures come out of the woods in the darkness. This is just like training his bow,

straining his eyes Trying to see 37 points of damage Alright Alright And then Take a second shot Put him down Nestor

And that's 23 And 23 is a hit Ah 11 12 points of damage Oh no Not gonna do it

Shit If you can't see me at home I'm shaking my head. Oh, wait, wait. Hold on a second. By the way, are you adding electricity damage to all this damage? Yeah. Are they, like, have any resistance to electricity?

I looked at that. Okay. No. Okay, cool. I don't know why I always think undead have resistance to electricity. They're weird. They have, like, this is all immunities. Look, it's just a whole thing.

You know how you have your, like, hang-ups in Pathfinder? Like, things you never remember or you think of as wrong, no matter what, no matter how many times you're told the right thing. Minus four shooting into melee. Every time. That's mine. That's what I was saying. All right, Baron. Both of the remaining whites have taken significant damage.

One has already exacted something that could, like, flat-out kill him. Do you want to save your dwarven brother in arms? Or the scumbag convict Nestor coin? Porque no los dos! And Baron's going to step into a location where he can shoot at both. So I think if he does a five-foot step diagonally towards the tree line, he might have to have cover through... Yeah, he's going to be shooting around Umlo.

You're fine hitting the one that Nestor just hit, but the one that exacted energy damage on Umlo is going to get plus... Umlo's between you and the creature. Right, yeah. Plus four to its AC. But Umlo is getting another shot. But you also will hit anything that you don't misfire at,

so you're fine. Because it's touch. Do a bit. Do another one. Or two. Are you aiming for the one that's... I'm aiming for the one that Nestor shot first Okay gotcha

Nice 19 That is a hit That is a hit I'll save you the damage roll You kill it Alright yeah Nestor came extremely close

It was at three hit points Oh fuck Yeah and they don't have con right When they get to zero They're done Yeah that's it Zero con Yeah

And this guy gets just a plus Whatever to it Plus four to its AC That is a 21 against touch AC Oh that'll do That'll do And this guy gets just a plus whatever. Plus four to its AC. That is a 21 against touch AC. Oh, that'll do, Baron. That'll do. That'll do, pig.

15 points of damage. And let me check the amount of hit points it has left. Still alive. One more. Last shot. Still alive. Baron is going to get up close and deadly on this one. Yes, do it.

One. Roll a one. Roll a one. Ooh. What is that? It's plus four. It's a... Plus five. That's an eight against such AC. That's a miss. That is a miss. But he still takes damage

from the up close and deadly. Yeah, he takes half damage. Oh, right, right, right. One point of damage. Oh, no, I'm sorry. Two, two, two. Little graze. Totally forgot. Lumbering towards. Sir Will, you'm sorry, two, two, two. Little graze. Totally forgot. Lumbering towards. Sir Will, you are in the tree line. I was going to...

You can't charge out of there, just to let you know it's because you're in the thicket. Using Lexington's movement, I can double move though, right, and get out of there. Okay, I'll just get... Well, I'm not going to go all the way to that thing because I'm not going to be able to hit it, I don't think So I will get out there and

Shoot You know what, I'm going to use his move And then I'm going to hold my action Wait, I can't do that, I have to ready an action I will ready an action Because if he comes in melee, he'll be ten feet away, so that won't be relevant. You know what? I'll ready an action, and if he hits any of our allies, I'll channel positive energy.

Okay. Interesting. All right. It's Della's turn, then Umlo's turn, and then its turn. Oh, yeah. This thing's dead. Della will magic, then Umlo's turn, and then its turn. Oh, yeah. This thing's dead. Della will magic missile.

Magic missile. Does it have a brooch attached to its decayed flesh? It did sleight of hand on Baron's brooch. All right, magic. It jabs it into its flesh. Missile. 12 points of damage. 12 points of damage. That's it.

It's still alive. It's still alive. It's up to Umlo. Umlo could kill it, because you've got multiple attacks, it. It's still alive. It's still alive. It's up to Umlo. Umlo could kill it. Because you got multiple attacks, right? She's like, alright, now I'm not going to let you ruin another Inheritor's Day. This happened last

year. The exact same thing. And I'm holding a grudge, I'll tell you right now. So you're about to go back to the grave and etc. 14. 16. 16 is a mess. Shit.

Shit. Umlo also has to be 15 feet away, so if you could put him a five foot step back. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm 7 foot with a little magus. I have another missile. Oh. I guess that's too late, huh?

Hands off the chest piece. Hands off the chest piece. I'm sorry. Sorry, Matthew. God damn it. You have one job. Know your character. Second attack from Umlaut.

16. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. He goes to slam Umlaut again. Oh, it's actually, it was less. I forgot about the...

Hang on. Negative levels are the worst fucking thing to deal with. Oh, my God. Hero Lab is one thing. Mathematically, they're all. Mathematically, it's actually, it was less. I forgot about the... Negative levels are the worst fucking thing to deal with. Oh my god. Just mathematically, though. Mathematically, it's so fucking shitty. Does he also have 15 feet of reach? He has 10 feet of reach. So he would have to close and take an attack of opportunity.

No, he'd take a 5-foot step. 5-foot step. And because nobody else got up in melee with him, he's gotta go after Umlo. If he hits and does energy drain to Umlo, Umlo will be down two negative levels. I mean, it's a death sentence. Oh, my God.

Talk about knowing your character. I should have retconned my turn. I should just channel positive energy against him. I didn't even think of that. Oh, yeah. So I'm dead. Oh, my God. What an idiot.

I would have rolled three ones. Learn your character. Yeah, I know. Practice what you preach. I'll roll this in front of the table, because, I mean, this is a death sentence for Umlo. If not now, soon. Ooh, not good.

It's gonna be an 18 to hit. It's got a miss. It's a miss. His AC shouldn't go down with the negative level. It doesn't, no. It affects hit points, stuff like that, so that is a miss. Yes. Clutch. I don't believe it even affects hit points. I think it's all attacks, saving throws, skill checks. It's minus two to everything yeah i think you lose

some hit points too but i can't remember we'll look it up between episodes you lose one hit die well i don't know it doesn't work like yes it's not like it's and it's not like an actual level is taken away it used to work like it's extremely extremely bad yeah it's bad uh and if he had lost two levels you might as well just slit his throat and leave him in the stream. It's round three. We put him in the bag of holding. Nestor, take this one out.

All right. Many shot this thing. All right, so he steps up, five foot step, and he's just like, 99, what? And that's a hit. Deadsville.

Oh, concealment. Oh, yeah. Thank you for remindingadsville. Oh, concealment. Oh, yeah. Thank you for reminding me. Yeah, you got it. That's 27. 34 points of damage. Boom! Kills the final white.

All right. Saturday night's all white for fighting. What could have been very, very ugly for all of you was only really, really bad for Umro. I want you to think about that. Because I'll see you next week.

No! Pablo! We need the sad outro music. Sad outro music. You've got to save my life! Bring me back. I love you all. This is the worst Inheritor's Day ever. It's the worst Inheritor's Day. Outro Music