The Glass Cannon Podcast - Strange Aeons Episode 70 – Ghost Ride the Bean Whip

Episode Date: April 11, 2023

An occupied guardhouse outside of a lunar prison proves to be a more than capable first line of defense. Join Troy Lavallee, Joe O'Brien, Skid Maher, Matthew Capodicasa, Sydney Amanuel and Kate Stamas as they tour the country playing the Lovecraftian Horror Strange Aeons Pathfinder Adventure Path. Watch the video here: https://youtu.be/1_3I_9jYgt8 For more podcasts and livestreams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com and for exclusive content and benefits, subscribe today at patreon.com/glasscannon. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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It's how we made it more one. You are listening to the Glass Cannon Network, the premier source for role-playing game entertainment. Good evening, everybody. It's Thursday, April 6th, 8 p.m. Eastern. Do you know where your children are? Yep. Do you know where they are? Well, actually, no.

I left them at the park. Potentially no. Oh, my God. I have to go. I actually, I never have any idea where any of my children are. They could be anywhere. They could be in college. They could be anywhere on earth. I don't know how old they are.

They could be in college. I hope they're doing well. I hope they think of me often. They can't be any older than the time, than the earliest entries to the first sperm bank you ever went to, right? I guess they couldn't be older than 35. Oh, my God. That means you could be a grandfather. I could.

I hope my grandchildren, I hope they're doing okay. I hope they can pay for college wherever they are. Maybe one of us is your child. Whoa. Whoa. That just blew my mind.

You guys are always finishing each other's sentences. I mean, this is a weird thing. Like, regardless of how safe you were over the years, there's always a chance that someday your doorbell's going to ring and you're going to have to be confronted with something crazy. Sure, but I thought you were going to say a child. I feel like the... For example, I would know if I

had one. Yeah, I was going to say. You would probably know. I think I would know. Come to think of it, I was like, that could really happen. Wait, no. I would know. I would know. What if you donated an egg, though? I would say if you've seen the later seasons of Allergy Field. That's my eye was your egg. Oh, which I sure have. That's my eye was your egg. Yeah. Which I sure have.

That's like a really intense and arduous process. They pay you a lot of money, but if you do. It's like months. It's like months long. It's months long of like sticking a needle in your leg or something. I don't know. You need an egg guy? I could do it in a day.

Do you have an egg guy? I got an egg guy. Get out of there. I know a great egg guy. A price of eggs these days. You got an egg guy? I got an egg guy. Get out of there. I know a great egg guy. A place of eggs these days? You got an egg guy? Let me know. Right on the other side of the river.

Great egg guy. Am I right? I have a relative in my family who he is, I'd say late 60s, maybe even early 70s. Let's say early seventies and right around, uh, sometime in his mid to late sixties, he got the email, uh, with the advent of, uh,

you know, uh, 23 and me and all these DNA sites. He got the email that says, uh, uh, this DNA test, it looks like bibbidi-bobbidi-boo.

And, uh, sure enough, it, it was his daughter and she was like, uh, 50 something and had a whole life, had a family with children and now they're, I think she's like part of the family.

Maybe once that happens, kind of like, all right, I guess we're adding an extra stop at Christmas. I don't know what the hell happened. Do you want to know something crazy? Yep. My dad was adopted. And he looked when he was, you know, like in his 20s, looked for his parents. But back then there was no digital records and the files were just gone.

Like there was no way to find them. The files probably burned down, you know, like in some fire or something, like just gone. It's like Philomena. He was just like, he was like, uh, you know. Was he raised in a nunnery? No. Continue. But he was just like, I guess I won't know, you know, like whatever.

And with the, you know, advent of genetic availability to the mass, I was like, you know, we should do 23andMe. Like we should just do it for fun, at least to find out our ancestry, because we didn't know what we were. And my dad was like, I don't really give a shit, but okay. Like should just do it for fun, at least to find out our ancestry, because we didn't know what we were. And my dad was like, I don't really give a shit, but okay. He just did it. He was like, alright. And I did it. And probably a year or two later,

I shit you not. Look at Skid's face. We found... I'm horrified at where this is going. I know, me too. It's a happy ending. We found his biological mother, who same deal had matched with us on 23andMe. It was like, we think this is your grandmother. And I was like, no shit.

So he messaged her and he was like, hey, totally understand if this makes you extremely uncomfortable. This is weird. But if you'd like to talk, you know, I'd love to meet you. And it just worked out. It wasn't that weird. They like got together. They met. And now they're like in each other's lives and they're friends.

And I've met her. And she's, you know, she's like a sweet old lady. She's like your grandma. She's your grandma. My grandma. Wow. And she's super nice. Wild.

And it was why like it was wild. But like you said, where was she? Was she in New York? Even better. She was in Mexico. Wow. She was running from the law? Yup.

No. She was a bank robber? She was on the lam? Did she leave your dad outside of an IHOP and run across the border? But it was super cool. But it's crazy because like you said like this woman has had her entire life you know like she has lived her life my dad has lived his life like there's only so much reconciliation you can do but it's kind of nice and wonderful that there's like the opportunity

in the world nowadays to meet your biological mom that's so mind-blowing though like was did she give him up for adoption like or was it okay yeah she like gave him up she was in a situation was he was he like hey what was the deal with that like did he ask the question or did he just avoid that conversation i think they had like a private conversation about it i think there were tears involved and there was a lot i mean who knows what a person is going through when you're 70 i don't even know if you would bring it up it's so you know but uh but no like we're friends on facebook me and her and every so often you know we're like merry christmas you know how you doing happy thanksgiving my grandma thanks for the check that is so amazing that's cool wild that it can

just happen you just it is weird all of a sudden to get a grandma like you know that's crazy kind of the worst time though i don't get like the gifts and all the cool stuff grandparents do i kind of missed out on that but that's okay does she like legacy of the ancients yeah that's a good question all right i will have to have her listen to this one episode where i talk about her and i'm sure she would go that's so nice. Has she left an iTunes review? They might not get it in Mexico though. They might not. They might not.

We have two downloads in Mexico every week. It's her trying two times because she doesn't know how to work the internet. How does this work? The novelist Ian McEwan had an older brother that he didn't know about. His parents, I think it was like a wartime situation.

His parents, like same parents, but they had given up his older brother for adoption because they couldn't afford a child and it happened. And then years later, we're in more, a more financially stable position that had him and they'd ever told him. And so he like met him when he were, they were both like middle-aged at that point. It's like, Oh, I've got another brother. I'm 53. All right. So check this out. I, there in my family who is like 90-something years old. And his wife and his wife's daughter – the wife's daughter basically got way into 23andMe or Ancestry, one of them.

So it started getting tests for everybody and got tests for her father. And it comes – they find out that, and she's reading the test. She's not giving him to her father to read. He's 90-something. She wants to read it and tell back to him. But they find out through multiple tests now, because the first one was like, wait a minute. Got another one like, wait a second. And then the third one to confirm that the man that he thinks has been his father his entire life, who he looked up to and just adored, wasn't his biological father.

The mom had had other like relationships and just settled with a different man and never told him that that wasn't his father. And they don't want to tell him because he's 90 something and like it would just they're afraid it would shatter his world as it would. Is it absolutely would. But isn't that crazy? Like they know that the man that he thought his entire life was his father isn't his father. And they they they just don't want to tell him. It is his father, though. I think so.

Troy, come on. Stop being so cold. You know what I mean. That's crazy, too, is these are all Simpsons episodes. Like, each one of these things has happened on The Simpsons. Simpsons, Herb. Homer's brother, Herb, the Detroit auto magnate. When Mona Simpson comes into their life, same thing.

They even have the same conversation about missing, not getting all the grandparent presents and stuff. They have that same conversation. Simpsons did it. Simpsons did it. It's a transcendent show. It's very possible that when we finish tonight's episode, it will be an exact replication of a season five Simpsons episode. They've done everything. It also, I feel like the chances are higher with Skid on the show of that happening because he could steer into it.

I can try to steer in that direction for sure. So I was watching today's like the episode where they had the bend, the talk show where it's like they have the bear like interviewing people in the audience. It's like a Sally Jesse Raphael, but it's like a wild bear. A microphone on its head. It's crazy. You know what's crazy? In two weeks, there will be no Glass Cannon Live here on Twitch because we will be in Boulder, Colorado. Amazing! Yes!

We'll be in Boulder, Colorado on 420. So stay home and get high because we'll be getting ready for a show the next night. Friday, April 21st at E-Town Hall. Now, at the time of this recording, VIP is completely sold out and there are only 24 tickets left.

I guarantee by the time this episode airs, it could be sold out. There may not be tickets left, so I'm sorry to get your hopes up. You had your chance. I really want to nail you down on this one, Troy. You're guaranteeing it could be sold out. I'm guaranteeing

there's a very good chance. I can't believe. We might have to edit this. Nope. You're leaving it. Leaving it. So bold. I want everyone listening to go check right now and just blast the comments. Like, no, it's not. No, it's not. There's 23 tickets left now. No, they need to blast the comments. Couldn't be.

Couldn't possibly be sold out. Couldn't be. Well, you know what may not be sold out is the other four shows that we announced. Two in May and two in June. Thursday, May 25th, we are coming back to St. Paul, back to Amsterdam Bar and Hall. And then two days later, we're hopping a plane to Asheville, North Carolina at the Gray Eagle on Saturday, May 27th. Flash forward a month, Thursday, June 29th, we're back in Hollywood, baby! Los Angeles, sunny

California, back at the Terragram Ballroom where we were last year, and then two days later, we're flying up to the Pacific Northwest to be in Seattle at the Triple Door on Saturday, July 1st. The 2023 Tour is on! It's back! Come see us.

Come see us. Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! We're gonna have so much fun. I'm very excited. There's back. Come see us. Come see us. Yeah. Yeah. We're going to have so much fun. I'm very excited. There's nothing better than being on tour. I just love being out there. I love traveling. I love hanging with you guys in person.

Yeah, in person is way better. Way better. I love backstage. And I'm super excited to return to St. Paul. And I'm super excited to go to Asheville for the first time ever. I've always heard great things about Asheville. I've never been either. I'm super excited to go to Asheville for the first time ever. I've always heard great things about Asheville. I've never been either.

I'm so excited for Asheville. Never been. I'm very excited to return to St. Paul. Sorry. Asheville's awesome. I really hope the tourists are in town

as I said the other day, the Asheville tourists. Sorry, Matthew. Go ahead. No, no. I was just going to say I'm very excited to go back to St. Paul because I'm in need of an E-string

for my guitar and that green room had a vending machine of guitar strings. Oh, yeah! That was amazing. A vending machine of guitar strings. Oh, that's going to be fun. Travel to these shows. I mean, the Asheville show,

I say it on Cannon Fodder a couple of weeks ago. We really need you to travel to these shows in these new cities because it allows us to try out new locations. You want us to come to Phoenix and Boise and Kansas City, then we need you to show up in Asheville. It's the only show in the South we're doing this year. So come on, Florida.

Come on up. You're allowed. And Atlanta, we're not coming to Dragon Con come on, Florida. Come on up. You're allowed. And Atlanta, we're not coming to Dragon Con, so come see us in Asheville. I'm so excited. In LA, we're going to be out there for like a week. It's going to be a blast. But speaking of blasts, a fireball is about to explode in your face. But first, how did we get here? But first, how did we get here? Last week, last episode, you had finally mopped the floor with those three denizens of Leng that were standing in the room where you first met the Yellow King. You're here to find the Yellow King.

You traveled back to the abandoned Caravanserai to meet with the Yellow King because once you got all the gifts, he was going to take you to the Mad Poet. The Caravanserai is a little weird. It's dark out. There's new people there. It looks like people have been searching the place, turned it upside down. It's denizens of Leng. You meet some boogeyman named Mr. Wanderlust who explains to you he's just a consultant working with a denizen of Leng named Weyreli who has come here with a bunch of her cohorts to do something, to take the Yellow King. Well, after you go outside, you see this giant flying dinosaur with a

howda on its back, who explains to you that Weyrali left with a man-matching description of the Yellow King on her brother, another Shantok, and they flew to the moon! This book is getting a little out of hand.

So you hop in the howda after convincing this dumb dinosaur that you're friends? Hey, Sybil is really sweet. She is sweet. She's a simple dinosaur. A little dumb for trusting us, but yeah, sweet. Well, she flew you to the moon, and you get to the moon. She is sweet. She's a simple dinosaur. A little dumb for trusting us, but yes, sweet.

Well, she flew you to the moon, and you get to the moon. Fly me to the moon. Fly me to the moon. You get to the moon, and you land on this paddock, and she seems concerned. And you realize it's because she expected her brother to be here and he's gone so now she's worried that they left without her and she needs to go back thereby stranding you on the moon and you're like well we'll just die and wake up yeah you'll die and wake up and then you know your way back to the caravanserai how do you know you can get to the moon and then you gotta find another shantok that just happens to be in the area to fly you to the moon. It's a very dangerous situation. You're

now kind of on the moon. You need her to fly you back to Caravanserai. It's complicated. So you convince her to stay. And you see this little lake and you walk in the direction of a building to the south of the lake. And there's a

guardhouse. Looks like the only way in. On the other side of the guardhouse is a portcullis that's down. And you hear a guardhouse. Looks like the only way in. On the other side of the guardhouse is a portcullis that's down. And you hear a voice that's like, get out of here. What are you doing? Come on. And it's a ghoul that's in there. I don't know if I mentioned that.

But I'm mentioning it now because you're about to see it. You didn't mention that. It is a ghoul that's peeking its head out of this tiny little hole that doesn't look like there's any door leading into the building. And Ethel stands up and demoralizes the ghoul when he tells you, you got to get out of here. You got to leave. And he's like, all right, come around. I'll open the gate. And you come around and he unleashes a fireball. And I'm going to have this happen pre-initiative.

Everybody roll a reflex save as I drop this. Uh, yeah, okay. God damn it. Fire! We were laughing before we started recording about how stupid we were. We were just like, oh, thank you for letting us in. Yeah, thank you. We just walked right into

the trap. Walked right back. Walked right into that fireball. You can see it on the map here. Hey, why'd you put it on me? Because that's where it, uh, that's where it started. It started on you. Um, so everybody give me a sweet little reflex save here. Um,

and then tell me what you got starting with Machu. 25. 25. Pretty good as he looks for the DC. 25. I thought it was a certain fail.

25, okay. It's pretty good. And Suki? 17. Not good at all. I rolled a natural 3. Okay. Spoiler alert. Not good.

Atticus? I did not roll a reflex save. I would like you to. I object. No, I said in our last episode, they all get mixed together. I think it was our last episode. Here we go. That I got new spells when I leveled up.

And I mentioned one of them, Cone of Cold. And said I did not mention the other because it was new. Something that we hadn't seen before and I wanted to save it. Yeah. Well, it's been saved. And I'm going to use it now. Ooh, is it an immediate spell? It is a reaction spell from the illusion school called Shadow Siphon. Ooh.

I cast it. So as soon as this begins to cast a fireball, Atticus is on top of this with what he's been studying and reading and writing in his creepy, like, grimoire. And he casts this spell immediately. And essentially what it does is as the fireball comes at us, this, it starts to change from just an orange ball into a half purple, dark shadow of a fireball. And he basically forces and changes the material of the fireball to become an illusion and not real. It's really cool.

It's extremely cool. However, it doesn't just automatically happen. Joe's got to roll. Oh, no. And there's two pieces of really bad news. The first one is Joe has to roll. The second one is after the roll, it's going to be a counteract situation, which means none of us will understand it and we will 100% get the rule wrong.

But here we go. of us will understand it and we will 100% get the rule wrong. But here we go. I really thought I had counteract down, but every time it manages to confuse me when I'm live on air. Here we go. Okay, well what's the spell called? Let us know the name of the spell. It's called Shadow Siphon.

S-I-P-H-O-N. Shadow Siphon. It's a very common word. Yes. And so basically if I get a good roll, it works. Now, because it yes um and so it basically if I get a good roll it works uh now because it is it is really powerful in terms of the counteract

and the counteract how do you spell shadow go ahead I was just wait I was just I was seeing you in my mind typing s-i-f-o-n because you went to actor school I almost want a spelling bee in my mind, typing S-I-F-O-N because you went to actor school. I almost won a spelling bee. What was the word you went out on?

Satchel. Satchel? I didn't know what it was. I think I spelled it S-A-C-A-G-L. I forgot the T. To this day, I don't know how to spell it. Maybe I spelled it S-A-T, and it doesn't have a T.

My word was Colonel C. The girl got it! Colonel C, Skin? Colonel C was my word. The first time I heard that word was in Downton Abbey. Satchel or Colonel C? Colonel C. Is that popcorn related? What is Kernel C? Kernel C. Is that popcorn related?

What is this Kernel C? All right. Okay. I'm going to... Basically, I'm rolling right now. I was trying to buy time for Joe to reread Counteract. I'm reading Counteract right now. It is, it is.

But first, let's just do the roll. This is going to be against the spells DC. So you have the spells DC. Here we go. Yeah, sure. Natural one. Did anyone wonder for one second? All right, I'm spending a hero point.

Was it a natural? It was a natural one. So excited about this new spell. So excited to be able to help my friends. I mean, the game just takes and it takes and it takes. It never gives anything. I mean, from who it takes, it gives.

That's true. It gave to Troy. It took from me. I feel like I just got a new grandma. Alright, hero point. Now I i'm gonna die in this in this episode the troy just said it was a funny joke oh i missed it i said i feel like i just got a new grandma that was good all right rolling again come on come on o'. Okay, all right. That is a 27 against the Spells DC. All right, so now let's just talk this through. I'm not telling you if you passed or failed,

but what happens if you fail? If I fail, I am successful if the counteract level is lower than your effect's counteract level, which it would be. Because the counteract level is lower than your effect's counteract level, which it would be. Because the counteract level is essentially, unless I'm getting this wrong, is going to be the level of the spell.

So that's the counteract level. If an effect is a spell, its level is the counteract level. Okay, so even if you were to fail that this check, that 27, say that 27 was a failure, you still could counteract it? I still successfully counteract it because Fireball is a lower level spell than this spell. What if it's a heightened Fireball?

Well, then that's what we have to see. If it's heightened Fireball, so this specific spell. What's that? This is a fifth level spell? This is a fifth level spell, but it has an added thing. Shadow Siphon's counteract level is two higher for this attempt. So it's a seven is the counteract level. Wow.

Yeah. Wait, so yours is effectively a seven? Mine is effectively a seven, the way I read it. The last line of the spell says, treat Shadow Siphon's counteract level as two higher for this attempt. Oh. Treat Shadow X, wow, okay, as two higher. So that becomes seven.

And you did fail on the 27. But you counteract the target. If its counteract level is lower than your effect's counteract level, which because of that particular spell, it is. Yes. Awesome. Okay. So it just means it makes half the fireball into shadow fireball, as if it's from the shadow plane, and it does not exist or harm us on this plane.

So everyone takes half damage. Takes half damage or half again depending on the result of your save. Half of whatever they would have taken. That is massive. Now do you still roll the reflex save?

Absolutely. I just wanted to get that done first. And then reflex save is I'm sure a failure. That is a 26. Yeah, so that's a fail. Okay, and then, Kate, what did you roll? I had a natural 15 for a 32. Oh, wow. Reflex is my best.

What about Aldo's skit? I, like Sydney, got a natural 3, and I got a 19. Okay, so skid and Atticus Not Skid, not you Skid Aldo, Atticus Oh no! Aldo, Atticus and Ethel would have taken

40 points of damage but instead you take 20 Suki would have taken 80 points of damage Oh my god I do need a retcon if this makes any difference on the critical fail you take 20. Oh, man. Suki would have taken 80 points of damage. Oh, my God. I do need to retcon if this makes any difference on the critical fail. I had my old character sheet open. It was

a 18, not a 17. Still a critical fail. Okay, just checking. That's okay. But now you're only going to take only 40 points of damage. But that would have been... And there's the hero point thing. 80. Now it's too late. And then, Kate,

you would have taken 20. You take 10. Because you were the only success. Caster v. Caster. I just love it! So cool. Roll for initiative. Let's dance! He's got to be a little intimidated.

That was That was pretty awesome Yeah that was when I was reading through spells There's obviously a huge amount Of amazing 5th level spells But like for it to be illusion school A reaction spell of which I really have none You know I was like I gotta take this

I gotta take this And for it to happen so quickly That's awesome Yeah and I think we did it well I did it correctly I think so too take this i gotta take this and for it to happen so quickly that's awesome um yeah and i i think we did it well uh i did it correctly i think so too it's all based on if you got the only thing i would question is like what you rolled for your check as long as you got your roll right i think everything else we did correctly yeah i i'm not sure 100 what to roll but i rolled my spell attack roll which i feel like like is probably the number that I

roll. When attempting a counteract check, add the relevant skill modifier or other appropriate modifier to your check against the target's DC. I rolled my spell attack modifier. For spells, the counteract check modifier is your spellcasting ability modifier, plus your spellcasting proficiency bonus.

Plus any bonuses and penalties that are specifically applied to counteract tricks i think you might have been right uh certainly even if you were off i don't think you would have critically failed right because you were off by one on the dc with a 27 well if i'm successful it doesn't change anything right uh it just yeah so if i'm in critical success it doesn't change anything. Right. Even critical success, it doesn't help you in this instance. Right, exactly. This is what I realized about counteract. It's not that difficult if you're going against

something that's kind of equal to you or you're stronger than. It's not that difficult to counteract. It's when you're trying to counteract something a higher level than you is really difficult. It's quite cool. Let's talk initiative. What'd you get there, Atticus? I got a 27.

Sorry, sorry, sorry. That's not right. I got a 23. I did my reflex save as my initiative. You're so stupid. I wish it was. Suki, what'd you get? I got a 34. 34? But I need to do this

Because if I don't do it now I'm going to get it wrong For this entire campaign while I have it Pepsi is on the field So Pepsi needs to also Make a reflex save Oh no Pepsi Pepsi's with me

Critical success That's a That's a 27. Snake got good reflexes? That would be 40 points of damage. Instead, it's 20. I mean, does Pepsi have 20 hit points? Yeah, Pepsi's pretty healthy. I mean, that's not good.

I feel bad for my snake, but Pepsi's okay. This is the same snake that you tried to shoot out of a bone-out. Exactly. I think that this snake has been really misimagined for all of us. It really all started with the shooting it on an arrow thing. I need to do a PR campaign for Pepsi. I need new Pepsi. Crystal Pepsi is Pepsi's new name.

Giant Pepsi. A snake that shrugs off 20 points of damage. Could have been fired from a crossbow. All right, what'd you get, Ethel? 24. 24. Sugs off 20 points of damage. Could have been fired from a crossbow. All right, what'd you get, Ethel? 24. 24. Eris?

I got a 26. 26 for Eris. And my main man, Skid, what'd Aldo get? I got a 30. 30! All right, well, we are in it, and I am going to do the following. So if you look at the map here, I have not revealed the guardhouse because it won't really help you. Can I disagree?

Respectfully disagree. Might we be the judge of that? Is this up for discussion? The difficult thing is Reveal no longer works. Just use your imagination. Even Polygon Reveal doesn't work. Have you tried asking? Please, Reveal.

Have you tried restarting your computer? I can't do that. We're live. But anyways, it is there doesn't seem to be any sort of door there. If I can, I'm resetting the VTT here. If it comes up, I'll try to reveal it. If it doesn't, this is going to be a short

episode tonight. But there doesn't seem to be any discernible way, like a door. There are small little windows, but the person that attacked you, that ghoul, because you can now see it, this green-faced monster, doesn't look like your typical ghoul.

Looks a lot like ghouls that you faced or talked to in the Necropolis, if you remember, is standing there. And it is Suki's turn. Wait, so there's no windows, but we can see the ghoul? Yeah, well, no, I'm sorry. There are windows. There's no door.

And so you see him kind of peeking around, and that's where the fireball came out of. And he appears to be alone in this small, what, 10-by-5-foot gatehouse. Okay, and then question, remind me, where we were before we walked over to this door to get ambushed. Were we talking to him through a door?

No, he was talking through a window. He's like, get out of here. You're not supposed to be here. Go away. And then, all right, I'll open the portcullis. So you guys came around, and right to the west here is a portcullis that is down. But he tricked you. Okay.

Tricked us. Trixie. So he has a little Trixie situation here. Yeah, I don't really know what to do. I'm just going to, as like a reflexive action, not a reaction, but just in story terms, Suki just casts shield on herself as if she meant to do it before the fireball hit, but kind of missed a little bit, and now shield is up.

So she casts shield, and that, yeah, I'm just gonna, that's what I'm gonna do. I don't know what to do. Okay, yeah, no, you can do that. So you're gonna cast shield, give yourself a little boost, and kind of wait this one out.

It is then Aldo's turn. Aldo is going to do something I don't think he's done before. Whoa! He has a new sort of formula that he's been working on distilled

with perhaps the urine of Werner Hedgehog. Gross. Gross. Very special concoction. How gross. And he pulls it out of his bandolier, guzzles it. It is a Quicksilver Mutagen. Oh, nice.

Yes, it will give him a bonus five feet to his foot speed, a plus one bonus to his dex checks including ranged attacks and he will take some damage so he actually like I think his bones actually lengthen to like you can hear a cracking sound as his joints kind of rearrange themselves and he gets more angular and lanky

if that were possible and it is incredibly painful he takes 24 points of damage, I think. Oh, wow. Oh, my gosh. But it gives a little, a tiny bonus. So there we go.

That's probably stupid, but there we are. Never accomplish anything without doing something stupid. That's what they say. So that's one action. And then, for his second two actions, he's going to try to find a door.

Alright, so you walk over, do you want to walk over to the gatehouse, or do you want to just kind of do a perception check from where you're standing? I'll do a perception check from where I'm standing. Okay, second'll do a perception check where i'm standing okay second action perception check uh 22 all right 22 um it seems like it would be possible to climb in and out of the window um especially now for me yeah you could get it you could get in and out

um and and it would it's probably like slow you down as you're going in. Think greater difficult terrain. It would probably cost you an extra 10 feet of movement to cross over into the gatehouse. But then you would be also in there with him. You don't really know what else is in there, but it does seem possible to get in there. Okay. So you've got one action left. As final action, he yells out,

Hey! You can crawl in through the window! You can crawl in through the window. So he yells that. He does not go in. It is the creature's turn, and that's going to happen right after this quick break. We're back, and I'm going to reveal two things to you. The first thing I'm going to reveal two things to you. The first thing I'm going to reveal is the ghoul that I was talking about.

Oh! That's what he looks like now. He's actually in there. He's not standing on the roof with a fiddle having fun. He's in there. Sounds crazy. The other thing I'm going to reveal to you is the second fireball he just fucking dropped on you. Oh, no.

Come on. Give me another reflex save. Unless you have another siphon. You know what? F you. I'll do it again. You'll do it again? I'm going to do it again.

I mean, if you have it, if you have a reaction. This is ridiculous, but I'm going to do it again I mean if you have it If you have the reaction This is ridiculous But I'm gonna do it again Okay This is a fifth level I'm going to use I'm gonna use It's just too much damage

I mean if somebody Critically fails I mean you're done If I critically failed I would be I would be unconscious I would die I have my shield up

Don't worry And if your shield is useless Yeah Don't forget if you critically fail You go straight to dying, too. Right, exactly. I can't afford that right now. Yes, I am going to

once again, he's going to draw from the powers within his eldritch amulet, his bonded item. It opens up and it begins to bring out this, like, purplish mist that is going to change the fireball into not real. Don't believe it.

He screams at everyone. It's only an illusion. And so, yeah, maybe, maybe with your minds, you can get rid of this. Here we go.

Going for that counteract, John. Natty 18. Rush city. Boom. Crush city. But we need, we need an actual total.

Give me an actual total. We need an actual total. Give me an actual total, but I think you would have to critically fail here for it to not counteract it. Right, so it doesn't actually... Yeah, you're right. You don't need an actual... Because of that particular spell, where it counts as two levels higher, you already know that you can beat it. So this will be... I know that it is...

Because of the last one, I know it's not a critical success. It is just a success, but I counteract it. Yeah, and even a critical success wouldn't make a difference. Right. So you counteract it. Half damage. Let's see if it'll be half a minute. Everybody give me a reflex save.

Oh, geez. And as you can see, he is conveniently out of the range, and that's why it was on Eris, because he wanted to be out of the range of his own bomb. Terrible roll on the reflex save. Terrible. Let's start with you then, Atticus. 23.

23, okay. That is a fail. Harris? Pass. Got a natural 19 this time. Nice. Was it a critical success? Probably not.

I wanted you to math. 36. 36, no. Pretty damn close. Suki? 32 for Suki. Okay. And 28 for Pepsi. Okay.

And Ethel? 28 for Ethel. 28 for Ethel. And Aldo? 27 for Aldo. 27 for Aldo. All right. So only Aldo and Atticus failed, but they weren't critical failures.

So it would have been 40 damage again. I rolled another 40, but instead it's going to be... Yeah, it's going to be... You rolled the exact same amount of damage. I did. I'm using it on my roll because it's 10d6. I rolled a 40 twice. So you both take 20 points of damage. Eris and Suki and Pepsi and Ethel, you take 10 points of damage.

Yeah, I mean, that's just wild. Not great. Suki and Pepsi and Ethel, you take 10 points of damage. Yeah. It would have been half. That's just wild. Not great. If I didn't do that, I'd almost be down. I think I would be dead. If you rolled a 38 there, Eris, he would have taken no damage. But yeah, I mean, you had to do that.

That was huge. And with his final action, he is going to just slide to the south. Slide to the south. And now, I'm using six computers to run this. It is Eris's turn. What do you got up your sleeve there, Eris? I didn't know what to do because I couldn't see this guy. And I guess I still can't.

I mean, we can only see him through the window if we're, like, kind of out the window. Yeah. Do we have, like, line of sight for spells? Like, where is the window? Yeah, you know what? Let me see. I'm going to say you do. But if it's an attack spell, he's going to get some cover there.

Any sort of attack. If you were trying to do something to him, he's going to get a cover if it was a spell that had an attack roll. Well, let's see. I want to cast Guidance on Ethel.

Do you have to touch him or no? No, it's 30 feet range. You make it sound so distasteful for touching Ethel. Do you have to touch him? I don't have to touch him, but I can flavor touch him. That's alright. Do you have reach?

Alright, so I want to class Guidance on Ethel and then I don't... This is a really big, big, big prison, and this is just one guy, but he's doing fireballs. Dropping bombs. Ugh! So, I'm gonna... I'm torn.

Nothing's right, I'm torn. I was just gonna say it. I'm all out of love this is how I feel that's exactly what I was thinking thank you Kate I'm all out of faith I'm gonna do impending doom

on him dropping some doom on this John dropping some impending doom and what happens is you roll a will save okay now let's just take a look at here is this the one that has the incapacitation Doom. And what happens is you roll a will save. Okay. Now, let's just take a look at here.

Is this the one that has the incapacitation? It has incapacitation, so yes. Okay. Now, here's the thing. It's the incapacitation trade. It's been a while. I just want to see any creature more than twice the spell's level. And it's a third level spell. So, yes, this would be, he's always going to get one

higher success in what he rolls. But let's roll it. And this is a what kind of save? A will save. A will save. Let's see how his will is. Oh, not a great roll. That is going to be a 23. All right, so that's not a critical fail. It's a regular fail. Which becomes a success. Mm-hmm. All right, so I'm unaffected.

So you're unaffected for this round. Second round, you will be affected. Okay. You will be. You will be affected. Yeah, it was a pretty shit roll, so there was a chance there. Okay, and that was two actions, and the first one was guidance. Great.

Moving right along, it is Ethel's turn. Okay, Ethel is going to... Merman. What was that? Merman. Yes. Ethel Merman is going to run and climb through the window. Okay. So passing from the outside to the inside, you have to add ten feet to your movement.

Okay. We're going to treat it as greater difficult terrain. But you're a boss, so you're going to slide in there? Yeah, I was going to see if I could roll acrobatics or do athletics, but it seems like the easiest thing is just to climb through the window. Yeah. Does that put me out? I mean, no matter where I am, I'm next to him. but it seems like the easiest thing is just to climb through the window. Yeah. Does that put me out right?

I mean, no matter where I am, I'm next to him. Yeah, you're in there and he's like, ah! Okay, that was action number one. Action number two is a double slice. You know who he kind of looks like? He looks less ghoulish and a little bit like, I mean, the face is ghoulish, but he looks a little bit like our old friend. He does look like Jack Benny, but also our old friend Thune. Yeah.

He looks a lot like Thune. Call me Thune. Okay. Double slice, scimitar, warhammer, orange dye is the scimitar. Come on, just natural 20. Just once before we get out of the dreamlands, I want to No natural 20.

Cut somebody's head off. You also have guidance. Great. Which I apply to a single roll or... A single roll, either attack, perception saving, or skill check. Save it for perception. All right. That is going to be a 30 for the Warhammer.

Okay. And a 32 for the Scimitar. That is going to be two 30 for the Warhammer and a 32 for the Scimitar. That is going to be two hits. Nice. Yeah, it better be. Beautiful. Let's do the Warhammer first. Wet hits.

15 points of damage from the Warhammer. Why are they wet? And that'll be 18 points of damage from the scimitar. Oh, nice. First blood has been drawn. Max damage. Nice. Max Dimaggio.

All right, is that the end of your turn? That is three actions, and it is the end of my turn. It's quite powerful. Way to set up Joe Bryan with Atticus's turn. Joe, you've been a hero here with this new spell of yours, Staving Off Death of your allies. What will you do? I was thinking about it.

I was like, I can't believe I've used two fifth-level spells in this combat and haven't gone yet. And it made me think something. I don't like what you did, LaValley. Something's fishy here. Yeah? What's with the surprise round? I was waiting for you to bring that up

This isn't This isn't your first edition Pathfinder game This isn't your grandfather's Pathfinder This isn't someone slightly older than you's Pathfinder This isn't the guy who was in fifth grade When you were in 1st grades Pathfinder Your mystery younger grandfather Who lives in Florida

I looked up For the hell of it today Because I was thinking about this I'm like man I really feel like this is a situation Where that fireball should come out You walked right into it But I was like you know what The surprise round isn't really a thing like it

is in 1E. There's no like any of that shit. So I googled for the hell of it to look this up. Sorry, when you say walked right into it, was it a trap on the ground? No, you walked right into the radius of his fireball that he was going to drop there.

So I looked up surprise attacks and it's on page 499 of the core rulebook, and it basically says it should be used sparingly. And so I'm using it now. I can't even tell you how much I don't like it.

I think it is so dirty. He is an enemy that we knew was there and was aware of. That's a lot of damage to put out. In an AOE to an entire group of people. Without a chance to have a go. I also thought it's like, what a great way to, like, you see this huge building

and like, immediately you're put on the ropes. It's just a, I thought it was a cool way of being like, shit's about to go down if this is the first guy. Or have four characters dying outside. Yeah, you thought it was cool? The point of order, the surprise...

This is never going to work out in Troy's favor. The surprise scenario that is being referred to on page 499 and 500 of the Corvoboard are surprise encounters. Like, you're sleeping and you're... You're sleeping! And an encounter occurs during the rest time.

Atticus is going to, I don't know what to do here. This is a real dumb situation, and I don't like my positioning, and Ethel's up in there. I can't even see the guy. So I'm just going to pull something from in that hut and just telekinetic projectile the dude. So he's just going to grab something off the wall, a loose bar, and smash it into this ghoul's face and definitely roll a natural one.

I can't tell sometimes if you're excited or not. You already did. I can't even begin to control what's happening, the fire that's boiling within me right now. So what did you try to do? Sorry, what did I? Oh, I tried to cast telekinetic projectile. But instead you rolled a natural one,

which means you critically failed a spell. Yes, which means I critically failed a spell. A cantrip that could kill all of you. Everyone shut up. I can't wait for this to be over. This one from Eric Clark in Seattle, Washington. He gave his last name

everyone. Go get him. Phantom from the green. You see You see a terrifying is Troy's favorite. Crossovers. You see a terrifying is Troy's favorite crossovers you see a terrifying spectral

Roger Comstone suddenly appear in front of you don't just change it don't read it aloud when it crosses genres like this you see an image

of Sir Julie in front of you laughing maniacally and glaring into your soul before she disappears again without explanation. The ghostly sight of the colossal

psychopath immediately strikes terror into you. That was her defining trait in life. She was a psychopath. Here we go. I had to make a will save and I roll a natural five. I can't buy a decent die roll here.

Well, I did roll that natty 18 on the counteraction. All right. That is going to be a 21 against its AC, so that's a fail, correct? Yeah. So failure is frightened three. Oh, my. That's panic, right? Is that panic? It doesn't say panic, Skid.

Just be quiet. I'm sorry. Ian, mute his mic. I'm going to take the frightened three condition, and then I'm going to run away. And this is mostly to not be in the range of the third fireball you're going to shoot, You horrible, horrible friend. All right.

So you are going to use your last action to run away in fear. I'm going to run away in fear. Sir Julius, how haunting my dreams. And he runs away. All right. You could be so lucky. Right? Hey, Sir Julie, get out of my dreams.

And into my car. It's the top of round two, and it's Suki's turn. Suki, Suki, Suki, Suki, looking everywhere. Suki, Suki. My shield is useless. Suki is going to and command Pepsi to crawl in through the window. Bye, Pepsi.

He came into the godhouse window. Pepsi goes in through the window and Pepsi's going to make two attacks on our ghoulish fiend, I should say. Pepsi gets three actions just to confirm, right? One of my actions is to command Pepsi.

Pepsi has a move action and then can attack. Yeah, he could attack twice. Okay, so he does get three actions. Yes. Okay, I didn't know that. So with his jaws. I think you're lying. I'm not lying.

Listen, Mr. Surprise Round. I think we all get a little white lie this game. Matthew was right for the right reasons. And I was right for the wrong reasons. Pepsi also gets a deck of opportunity. And that's my white lie for this game. All right, you. That's an 18.

I'm assuming that misses. It critically misses. Okay. It bites himself. All right. that rattlesnake i saw on tiktok and i'm gonna attack again just because i can and yourself a fourth action while you're at it that's uh i'll tell you what to balance it out we all get a fourth action next round what What do you say? That's a 23. A 23 is also a miss. Okay. Well, Pepsi's in the guardhouse. Get a little crowd in this guardhouse.

I know. It's just so ridiculous. I mean, to think what goes through your mind. The size. I'm looking at the unrevealed prison. It looks like an enormous dungeon crawl. Apparently the boss was just outside the front door.

He just greets everybody. He just greets everybody. He's a good guard. He is. He is a good guard. For Suki's second action His body's all over the place outside. Just blackened corpses

everywhere. Do you know he can cast seventh level fireball 85 times a day? We really should have realized it after we crunched through all the scorched corpses through our feet. The pork house is right over here. Crunch, crunch, crunch, crunch, crunch, crunch. It's a little wet. I could definitely see why he got the surprise round. You said that we can see through the window for spell attacks.

Yes, yeah, he'll just get cover. So then I am going to cast daze through the window as my second action, and you have to make a will save. Ooh, daze. All right, a little will save. All right, that doesn't have an attack. And I double-checked it. I don't think that's going to work.

I could be wrong, but I think that it can't work on... Oh, I'm sorry. Maybe I'm thinking of 1E. That it can't work on... Higher-level creatures. Yeah, I'm thinking of 1E. You're good, I think. Enchantment, mental, non-lethal.

Yep, it's just a basic will save. Yep. All right, basic will save Alright basic will save 33 Well yeah that does it Nothing happens Nothing happens Oh wait Oh no it is mine's a 23

Yeah so nothing happens It's a critical success Sorry this guy's a badass For real I said the boss is out front Speaking of badasses It's a critical success. Sorry. This guy's a badass. That's us. I said the boss is out front. He is the boss. Speaking of badasses, it's Aldo's turn. Oh, hello.

All right, do something cool. Suki says, do something awesome. My turn was wasted. Also, Skid, I'm just back here doing research the whole episode. I think you took too much damage. I don't know if I did. I was going to say. Okay, great.

I should have taken 16 points, not whatever, damage. No, I did. I was going to say. Okay, great. I should have taken 16 points, not 20-something. Also, this thing sucks for me, this Quicksilver Mutagen. It is basically worthless for me. I get the five feet of movement, but I really wanted the tiny boost to my two-hit rolls, which is canceled out by my moderate bombs. They're both item bonuses. So, like, I took 16 points of damage, and I get a debuff to my saves as well

for five feet of movement. I really should not have done that. Sometimes you just have to drink it and see. Yeah, it's just like, oh, this is terrible. Like the Malort. Yeah, it is. It's like the Malort. It's like the Malort of alchemical elixir.

Mutagens. Oh, mutagens, sorry. Sorry. Nerd. Nerd. So Aldo is, if I can find the map here, Aldo is going to, oh, he's right at the, so he's standing at the window right now? Yeah. Okay.

Then through the window, he is going to toss a dread ampule at this guy. A dread ampule. I love that word. Which one? Both. Good word. Ampule? Or dread?

Dread ampule. I like ampule, but the two of them together is also just awesome. Dread ampule. That is a 35 to hit. That is a hit, even with the cover. Okay, awesome. All right. Do you have something that avoids or ignores cover,

or is that just the cover of your allies that ignores, like lesser cover? Oh, actually, I think my goggles do ignore lesser cover, I think. Okay, so that's for your allies and stuff. This is full regular cover. Right. But it's still I think. Okay, so that's for your allies and stuff. This is full regular cover. Right. But it's still a hit. Okay. Okay, so that is 10 mental damage.

Ooh. And he has frightened one. Frightened one. Just checking out his various immunities. Yeah, he does not look happy about that. Okay, Frightened1. And you've got two more actions. All right, and then I'm going to...

I should have done this first. I'm so stupid. Stop berating yourself, Skid. No, Skid. Terrible, terrible day. Stop saying that about you about my friend my friend that way I know it's Matthew always says don't talk about my

friend that way it's like I hate to bring it to you Matthew but your friends a moron that is a that is a 30 to hit 30 to hit is a hit. Okay. So I should have done this first, but this is the Bottled Lightning. So that is 12 points of electricity damage, and he is flat-footed until the start of my next turn. Okay.

Stealing Kate's thunder. And with my last... With my last action, I am going to provide... I'm going to give guidance to Suki. Oh, thanks. Should have given it to Pepsi. All right. Well, now it is the ghoul's turn. I said this ghoul looks a little different. It looks similar to the ones that some of you met in the underground necropolis

where some of you perished, one of you being Atticus. Now there are two enemies here facing the ghoul, and he is frightened, and he is acting out, and he goes to bite Athel. It's going to be a 31 to hit. Yeah, that'll hit. Well, as they say, and by they, I mean me, a couple things are going to happen. First, we'll start with the damage.

Oh, God! That's going to be 16 points of piercing. And now, I first need a fortitude save. You don't need anything. You're good just the way you are, Troy. Need is a strong word. Oh, that's not going to be great.

24. 24. Everything seems to be just fine. You're definitely not a stage one carrier of Langul fever. Oh no. Langul. You're definitely not there. Now, give me another fortitude save.

Oh man. One of my favorite Stephen King books, though. The Languliers. Bam! 30. It's a good book. Why are you booing it? It's on fire. 30, okay. You seem to be fine.

Second attack with the jaws! That one is going to be most likely a miss with a 24. That is a miss. Okay, and then he is going to... Let me see what his Johnny is here. let me see what his Johnny is here. I'm going to attempt to tumble through your square to the outside.

Okay. I believe that's going to be athletics against your reflex DC or acrobatics against your reflex DC. So I'll roll it and you tell me which reflex DC that's going to be your reflex plus 10, but I'll roll it, and you tell me what your reflex DC that's going to be your reflex plus 10, but I'll roll it first.

Ooh, rocks! 39. You critically succeed. Oh, he just fucking backflips through you to the outside right next to Aldo. Oh no! That's where I'm standing.

Both equidistant to the wall I'm going to say you don't have cover from each other In this instance I guess you could If you're right up next to him We'll figure it out when we get there There's a window right I remember in 1E it was like

Whoever's closer to the barrier Gets the cover But where you're equidistant I don't think you get it But now he's right next to Allo, and he's out there with Suki, Eris, and a trail of rat piss leading to the north. And now it is Eris' turn.

Okay. This guy is really, really annoying. Truly. It's only one of him, and he's really messing up our stuff right now. He's mashing your potatoes. Um, okay. Hmm.

What do I want to waste on him? I feel like I don't want to waste anything on him, but then also he's really, really tough. This guy's a fat ass. He's hitting us like crazy. Um, so... Talk to me about Impending Doom for a second. He's hitting us like crazy. Talk to me about Impending Doom for a second.

He would have been flat-footed this round. Yeah, the thing is, you would have become flat-footed this round. You already are. So at least now it's extended past Aldo's turn, if that's what happens. Right, to your turn. Exactly. So that's cool. And then you become Frightened 1 next round. Right, so as that Fright goes away at the end of Skidster,

it will come back at the beginning or end of your turn. Let me see. I want to... Frick, I don't know what I want to do. I wanted to go up to him and cast Chill Touch. Everybody chill. But I also just saw him bite Ethel. Yeah, maybe don't.

And Ethel didn't react well to that. Maybe don't get close. I'm fine! I'm fine, alright? I know, I know. You're fine. Bring your filthy neck mouth my way. Listen, you little. I do want to cast Guidance on Aldo.

Maybe help with whatever you did to yourself with your Mutagen. Get a plus one next time. And then I'm going to cast Grim Tendrils. Grim? What? Oh, dear. Oh, no. Tsuki's in the way.

You can cast through me. It's a 30-foot line. Oh, dear. Oh, no. Suki's in the way. You can cast through me. It's a 30-foot line. Oh. Well. And Aldo, then, is also in the way. I say do it. Well, shit. You know what?

Casting Phantasmal Killer. Oh. Oh. Whoa. At me or at the bad guy? At you, Suki. Oh. Oh. At me? Or at the bad guy? Okay. At you, Suki.

No. Suki, what's your worst nightmare? At the bad guy. Good question. All right. So you make a will save. Death, emotion, fear, illusion, mental. Let me just check my immunities.

All right. All righty then. You said it's going to be a will save to begin with? Yeah. All right. All righty then. You said it's going to be a will save to begin with? Yeah. All right. Natural two. Oh! What does that mean?

Amazing. Total. It's probably not a critical failure because he has very high will, but it is very likely a failure at a 21. It's not a critical fail. It's a regular old failure. So you take 86 mental damage. Oh, nice.

And I'm going to use the online dice roller because I don't have 86. Yeah, and I'll be frightened, too. So now I'll just go up to frightened, too. That will take over for Haldo's frightened. So that's 22 points of damage. Hey, nothing wrong with that. Nice. Frightened

two. Nothing wrong with that at all. Okay. Very cool. And now it is Ethel's turn. Fantastic killer. Man, it fucks it to a... I love it. Yeah, yeah, maybe. And maybe not.

Actually, it's great because it does do a lot of just damage, but you're never going to kill anything of consequence. Until, sure, until you do. Maybe early game, you know, Gatewalkers, early game. No, no, no, no. Before you get into it, that, the killing thing, I just realized for the first time,

has the incapacitation trait. The killing part? Yeah, you will always only kill something that is lower level than you, basically. Yeah. Still cool. It is cool. And you really shouldn't be able to just kill a boss

with Phantasmal Killer. But it does sound like it would be a cool night at the table if that happened. I wonder if there's some sort of thing. If it happened like once every 50 encounters, it would be an awesome story. Yeah. Yeah. I wonder if there's a metamagic feat that allows you to remove

the incapacitation trait from HR. That would be amazing. Let's house rule it. Yep. 12th level. I'll trade my quicksilver mutagen rule it. Yep, 12th level. 12th level feat. I'll trade my quicksilver mutagen for it. That doesn't seem like a fair trade. It could be really useful if you want a failure save.

Whose turn is it? It's mine. It's your turn? Are you sure? No. Are you Ethel? I am Ethel. Then you may proceed.

Thank you. Double slice. I was under the impression You were playing the character Named Eris That is a mistaken impression Easy mistake Yes Easy mistake

One we've all made Yep I'm frightened That is a 36 On the warhammer And a 20 On the scimitar 36

What a range Is a hit. And the 20 is a miss. Yes, I thought it might be. Okay. Let me get some d8s here. That's gonna be 20 points of damage from the Warhammer.

20 points of damage from the Warhammer. Alright. Alright. The damage is coming slowly but slowly. You have one more action. Yeah. We've talked about this in the past.

An attempt to grapple using athletics has the attack trait, right? You take the multiple attack penalty on it. You do. You know what? I'm going to try it anyway. Ethel is going to reach around. It's going to try to reach around with one of his arms through the window to just grab this guy and pin him against the side of the building.

I mean, it's definitely cool. But yeah, you will take the multiple attack penalty. It's against my athletics DC, I believe. I'd have to look that up to be sure. Yeah. That's what I'm remembering off the top of my head. Let's see if my homework is paid off. Nope.

The athletics check against my fortitude DC. Fortitude DC? Okay, great. Which makes total sense. Well, you don't have to even know what it is because I rolled a natural three. So that's going to be a definite fail. I like it though. You're thinking outside

the box. You're thinking outside the guard house As they say here On the moon As they say That's his turn That's his turn Hell of a turn It is

Hold on a second What was your first attack Matthew? Was it 31 or something? It was a Was it really high? 36 I believe I believe. I believe that should be a crit. Why?

He's flat-footed. Because he's frightened three, he must be at this point. And flat-footed. Well, frightened doesn't lower your AC. Yes, it does. It lowers all... It lowers checks and DCs. Your AC is a DC. Your AC is a DC.

AC, DC. He's been understruck. Oh, I didn't know the AC was a DC. Yeah. The AC is a DC. Yeah. The AC is a DC. I'm so confused. I don't care for that. Now, it doesn't say that anywhere in the book, but it is.

No, it actually is. Okay. In that case, was it a 36? Yes, it was a natural 17 and a plus 19 to my Warhammer. All right, so you said it was 20 points of damage? 40 points of damn sanity, dude! Actually, 40 points of damage. You are also knocked prone.

Oh, that's right! Critical effect! Welcome to critical effect town. Woo! There he is, prone. That really sucks. That would change my third action, because I certainly wouldn't try to grab him out the window

if he was lying on the ground would you alright what do you want to do instead that's fine you can't just be happy with the crap now I fucked up I mean we literally we Joe literally gave me a note before about how I should always demoralize on

my first my first action but I was hoping to flinch so instead I will attempt to demoralize this fellow first action. But I was hoping to flinch. So instead I will attempt to demoralize this fellow. Oh, so your flinch is an action. You'll never demoralize. You'll always hope to hit with the double slice and then flinch. Yeah, exactly.

So I'm going to try to demoralize him. And I'm going to say, you lied to us. You liar. You dirty liar. What did you lied to us. You liar. You dirty liar. What did you say to me?

Did you already roll poorly and you're acting it out appropriately? Never has anyone spoken to me in such a way. All my years as a god. It was a 29 intimidation. Bite your tongue. Fail. What?

This is a fail. 29. You don't know that? All of his DCs are lowered. They are lowered, but he's got, you said 29? Yeah. Oh, that's right. Oh, fuck.

I just closed my document with all my shit. I'm all thrown off now. All right, wait. It's a 29. You said 29? Yes. That actually is a success. Yes!

So add another drop to his DCs. All right, so what is... Sorry, I'm all thrown off right now. It's just Frightened. Minus one. It's another Frightened. You stack another Frightened on, right? He doesn't speak English.

He doesn't speak English? What were we communicating in the entire roleplay scene? Common. Those are the only roleplay scene? Common. Those are the only words he knew in common. Oh. Wow. Wow. We really got lucky.

Hit the target, right? He had memorized them phonetically. He just says that. It makes it worse that we fell for his surprise attack. I feel dumber and dumber by the minute. All right, so wait. He was frightened three. This doesn't stack.

Does frightened stack? I think you just take the highest condition, which is still Ethel's frightened. Oh, is it? I thought it just kept stacked if it's from different sources. Yeah, I'm not sure about that. I think, I was just reading this the other day, but I think it's like

when you get tagged with another condition that's the same condition that you already have, they don't stack, you still just take the highest one. But if the duration is longer, you take the longer duration. Okay. So it was a waste. They don't stack.

Damn it! So I fucked up the other thing, but I got this right. And surprise attack I got completely right. Which is all that's really important. Oh, wait, but Troy, what you said is correct, though. So it's, I got completely right. Which is all that's really important. Oh, wait, but Troy, what you said is correct, though. So it's like, it's not like it replaces it. They're both there. So, like, Frightened

One has a longer duration, so that will still be in... I don't think we're gonna last that long in this, but, yeah. So what you said is correct about duration. Thank you. I just like hearing that I'm correct. Well, you're welcome. Pea Pants, what do you want to do? I knew who you were talking to.

Since he's already... Since he's already... Was he frightened five now? Because it stacks. His AC must be so much lower. So Atticus is going to fight through his existing fear of seeing his dead companion. And he will cast another round of telekinetic projectile.

Because if he can, his AC is lowered. He must be able to hit here. He's prone. He's frightened. Let's dance. Time for a natural 20. Double damage. Rocket.

Natural 2. Best stop. Enjoy the rest of your evening. Is that a critical failure? I'm just curious. It wasn't a one. It would be a 19. No, obviously with all these penalties.

Yeah. So it's just a miss. And then with his last action, he will move a little bit closer. That's amazing. I mean, I am ice cold. I mean, ice cold in multiple games. Skid could tell you. Matthew.

Oh, yeah. Even for you, it's been extraordinary. Yeah. skid could tell you matthew oh yeah it's been even for you it's been extraordinary yeah i mean you didn't get that it makes me realize that like for like a year i've been on a on a average streak yeah which has been amazing for you is is a is a white hot streak yeah but it's all coming back to me now uh i am then going to reduce my frightened condition by one and i don't care what you say okay uh reduce your frightened condition by one. And I don't care what you say. Okay. Reduce your frightened condition by one. That's fine.

It is the top of round three, and it is Suki's turn. She has to yell because Pepsi's far away. Pepsi's going to act and attack. Come on. This is Pepsi's moment. Prone on the ground next to a boa constrictor? Do something terrible. That's going to be a 26? All right, so...

Now, I said that Ethel didn't take any cover, but I think this boa constrictor, to try and stand up on its tail and attack through here, is going to... I feel like the ghoul should have a little bit of cover from this boa constrictor. Wait, because now you're outside the house? I'm outside the house.

Oh, okay. I thought you were still... Whereas Ethel's standing right there at the window. But I'm still going to let you attack and I'm just going to give him a little cover. But he also has a minus three to his AC, which will effectively be a minus one. And you said your total was what? For the record, a little cover in

2E is plus one. That's lesser cover. I just meant cover. Standard cover? Okay. Standard cover. Okay, well how much is standard cover? Let's use the words we mean. Plus two. Plus two. Okay, I rolled. I think we all do with it.

When you said just a little bit. Okay, I rolled. I think we all do, whatever. When you said, just a little bit. I like a little bit of cover. A little bit of cover. A little bit. You liking the cover? You liking the cover? I like a little bit of cover. I like a little bit of cover.

The thing is, I mean, I'll move. This episode is all over the place. I'll move Pepsi first, then. Okay, does he want to slither his ass out the window? Yeah, he's slithering his little ass out the window. Okay. And then he's attacking. Okay, now, yeah.

Okay. Yeah, sorry. I thought he was going to see how Pepsi can... I didn't tell you about the cover beforehand. Does Pepsi have... What kind of movement does Pepsi have? 30 feet? Yeah, 20 feet and climb 20 20 feet he can slither through a

window okay because there's another 10 feet to slither but i'm not gonna with semantics i'm sure he can get there all right so then uh there won't be cover and you said what was your roll 26 26 that's it under the current circumstances chomp chomp chomp, chomp. Ooh, nice. Nine points of damage. Piercing damage. Nine points of David Hyde piercing damage. He's not coming back for the Frasier reunion? Cutting Von Moth?

He isn't? No, how do you not have Niles? Isn't Frasier going back to Boston or something? Isn't that like the premise? Oh, is he? Yeah, come back. So it's, wait, are they remaking Cheers or Frasier? I don't know.

It's like a postquel. A postquel. Postquel. Let's go back to Boston. It's a double spinoff. It's a spin back. Cheers. Spin back.

Are you done your turn, Sydney? No. Okay, sorry. Ben Suki pulls out from her pocket a small back. Are you done your turn, Sydney? No. Okay, sorry. Then Suki pulls out from her pocket a small bean. Oh. And you might be thinking, what's that? A small bean? That is literally exactly what I was thinking.

At Suki, as if she heard you asking this in your mind, goes, yes. And then she crunches it and it turns into a fucking whip. And that's her, oh, I hit my mic. I was so excited. Bean whip? A bean whip. A bean whip. Ghost ride the bean whip?

Yeah, you haven't lived unless you ghost ride the bean whip. She says, bean whip. Yeah, that's cool. Yes. He brought the bean whip. Now it's a party. Seven layer bean whip. Now it's a party. Seven layer bean whip.

Come get your scoops. It's a seven layer bean whip. It's her verdant weapon, which I haven't used yet. Which she concentrated on and she made her verdant weapon so from a second she can just turn it into a weapon in her hand.

She's going to attack with her cool new whip. Cool whip? I thought you were going to... I thought it was a bean whip. I thought you were going to plant the bean and do something cool and it made me think of my boys were outside today and my

youngest boy, Dash, grabbed a little pom-pom and put it on the ground. And Archer comes over and says, Dash, you planted an imagination tree. I was like, that's really deep. So cute. You planted an imagination tree. That's such a deep way of saying it.

That's adorable. But you're turning yours into a whip. That's a 25 to hit I'm not that good with a whip You know what, with all his conditions That would be a hit if you got a 26 Cool Well said, Troy Well delivered

Oh, I'm using My guidance I hate this game I hate this game. I hate this game and the way you play it. Thank you, Alda, and thank you, Atticus. Why are you shaking your head, Joe? It's good. It's great. It's great.

Alright, there's a hit with the bean whip. The bean whip was a hit? Would you say you flipped the bean whip? The bean whip was a big hit! The bean whip was a big hit! The biggest Super Bowl party ever! You can't say flip the bean whip? The bean whip was a big hit. The bean whip was the biggest Super Bowl party ever. You can't say flick the bean. Damn, this is like...

My bean whip sucks. I gotta put some runes in this. She always brings that horrible bean dip. Bean whip. She's always flicking her bean. Yeah, that's what I'm doing with my bean whip. I'm flicking the bean. Come on. It's Sookie whip I'm flicking the bean Come on

It's Suki What's going on with this What are you doing over there You're flicking your bean whip Suki is again Soaking wet She wasn't in any water How's that possible

She's flicking her bean whip What the hell is going on What happened tonight We're planting imagination trees How's that possible? She's flicking her bean whip. What the hell is going on? What happened tonight? We're planting imagination trees. It was so pure, and now it's just so vile. So dirty. The saddest part is, I thought this whip had way more damage.

I have to put some runes into it or something, because that's a measly five points of slashy damage. It took 45 minutes. It's really not cool. It wasn't a cool whip at all. It wasn't a cool whip at all. It's not a cool whip at all. All right, so you flick your bean whip at him for five points of damage. Are you done?

I'm gonna attack again. No, you're not. You have to be out of action. You cannot have another action. That's not physically possible. You commanded. I attacked. You interacted. Then you flicked. You commanded. I attacked. You interacted.

Then you flicked. You took out your beam. Oh my God. You're going to count? It's an interact action to make the beam turn into a weapon. I don't know if it is. Hold on. You can spend a single interact action to cause it to immediately grow into that weapon.

I thought it was a free... All right. Well, this weapon's into that weapon. I thought it was a free... All right. Well, this weapon's so less cool than I thought it was. Also, I think it's probably a manipulate to even pull out the bean. I was going to say that, but then I'd be like, you know... I keep my bean on me. Joe's the asshole. I keep my bean on me.

You keep your bean in hand at all times? It's on a little ring on my finger. Genius. Ring bean. You know, I read this the other day. If you're getting something out of your backpack, it's like an action to take off your backpack. Yes.

And then you need two hands, I think, another action to pull it out. Were you reading this about your real life or Pathfinder? Yeah, there was a novel I was reading. I just thought I'd discuss it here amongst friends. My turn is over.

Oh, wow. I rest my case. Aldo, you just saw a scene to the south. Yeah, a lot just happened in this last episode. We live in a different world after that round. What are you going to do? I want to do... I can't... God. I should have done this a lot earlier

but i want to do a knowledge check did we did we ever do a knowledge check on this guy i just assumed that he was a ghoul like the other ghouls that we've faced and so i didn't i also never felt like i had that extra action but yeah yeah i just like i one of my best bombs is my blight bomb but they have to be vulnerable they have to they have to be able to suffer poison damage which i assume this guy isn't but i just wanted to make sure yeah we haven't done a recall knowledge um you could do religion here um it would be a different more difficult check with a cult but i would allow a cult i actually i wouldn't say that I would allow occult here And I'll tell you why if you hit it

Okay uh yeah I might as well I'm gonna do it I'm gonna try for the occult That was a pretty good roll That's a 35 The reason I'm gonna allow it is it is not just a ghoul It is a lang ghoul And so you would know that from your occult studies

And they are indeed immune to poison. Okay. Well, that's out of the way. So Aldo is once again going to throw a bottle of lightning at his ACDC. Man, I'm crushing it. I'm crushing it tonight for some reason. You've stolen it from Atticus. I did. I've shadow it tonight for some reason. You've stolen it from Atticus. I did.

I've shadow siphoned off of your luck. Shadow siphoned my luck. 35 to hit. Yeah, that's a hit. So close to a crit. Almost a crit, yeah, with all these penalties. Oh boy. Okay. That is 11

points of electricity damage. He's flat-footed. And I am now going to throw an acid flask at the fellow. Okay. And obviously, if he's not taking reactions here against Aldo's ranged attacks, you probably feel pretty confident he's not holding on to any AOs. Natural 20. Yeah.

You just can't stop. 32. Wow. Just can't stop. So that is a named crit. And is this a ranged John or a magical Jon? We've been using ranged in the past.

Yeah, I think you're right. I think you're right. Okay, this one is from I'm Feng Li in Ann Arbor, Michigan. In Ann Arbor, Michigan. Love Ann Arbor. Love Ann Arbor. Trying to do a show there. Feng Li from Ann Arbor, Michigan

comes in with, that's not how arrows work. Your target in an unexpected display of... That's not how bombs work. I'm so sorry. It's a fumble, wasn't it? It was. I'm so sorry.

Pea pants. So many fumbles today. I'm sorry, I'm Feng Li. Cate P. Pants. So many fumbles today. I'm sorry, I'm thingly. It'll come back. It'll come back around one day. Don't worry, Atticus will fumble enough for all of us to get you that crit. This one from John in Chicago, Illinois. Nearby.

Nearby. Shades of Gormley Call. As you eye your target up and down, looking for the perfect shot, your face takes on an evil glint reminiscent of a certain wild-haired witch. A shiver runs down the target's spine. Double damage, and you effectively inflict evil eye. Amazing. Oh, cool.

Target takes a minus two to one of the following. AC, ability checks, attack rolls, saving throws, or skill checks. And then make a will save. Oh, is it for the length of the effect? Okay. So let's go with the double damage first on the acid, John. Okay. So that off the bat, that is ten points of acid damage.

Okay. And then the persistent damage will also be doubled. Oh, that's right. On a crit. Right. Okay. Amazing. damage. Okay. And then the persistent damage will also be doubled. Oh, that's right. On a crit. Right. Okay. Amazing. Okay.

And then. And then a will save, which would be crazy high. So let's see if you can roll a natural 20. Actually, it's not crazy high. Was it 32, Skip? Yes. Well, I rolled a 29. Okay.

So that is a failure. The effect lasts 1d4 plus one rounds. So evil eye. So, Skid, you pick. Minus one to what? AC. Okay. Minus one to AC.

Minus two, sorry. Minus two to AC. Okay. So right now he has an effective... Well, is he still frightened three and flat-footed in those stacks? So he's a minus five to Ace. Yeah, I think he's frightened two, I think. Yeah, he's frightened two.

I think he's frightened two, and he is flat-footed again. Right, he's flat-footed. So he's an effective minus... Six. Four to his Ace. Frightened two, flat-footed two. And then... And then two for evil eye.

Two for evil eye, so it of mine, sixers AC. Good lord. They have evil eye and two? I don't think they do. Have you ever used a hex there, Aris? Yeah. My focus spells are hexes.

Oh, so you only get three focus points a day. Do you have three in your pool? I have three focus points in my pool Three spells, one cantrip Evil Eye is a witch cantrip And it just makes the target frightened Based on will saves Interesting

Took the sting out of that one Alright, well, it is my little ghoul's turn here And he's prone, and the first thing he's going to do is try and actually, you know what he does? This is what he does. He reaches into his

like a little scroll case sitting on his belt. You see other scroll cases where the tops have been popped off, and he goes to pull out a scroll, and I believe that interact action will provoke. Manipulate action. Manipulate, excuse me, will provoke for Metholt. Get him.

Get him. Before he can cast the scroll, dude. You see him just like laying on the ground, fumbling at the scroll case. I'm doing it with the scimitar, but I think you should give me some cover. I should take some cover, because I'm swinging down through the window. He's on the ground.

Fair. Same as I would have done for Pepsi. Come on. Natural 18. I want the natural 20 so bad. Oh, man. What a horrible death. It still might be a crit.

It's a 36. It probably still is a crit. It is a crit. With all of the penalties. Yeah, and he's prone. Yeah, that is a crit. Okay. Let me just check.

The one thing I didn't think about is the forceful... You'll get this scroll if he doesn't cast it, too. Oh, yeah! So attacks of opportunity are not subject to the forceful trait, I'm assuming. Right, Joe? I'm not sure what that... No, I don't know. Why wouldn't they be?

The text of it says This weapon becomes more dangerous as you build momentum When you attack with it more than once on your turn There we go Okay so this is going to be Crit 22 points of damage Nice 22 points of damage and he. 22 points of damage, and he is dead.

Yes! That was so huge! That was so huge, I thought. Leans out the window and just like... And we get a scroll! And he brings the scimitar down and just doesn't chop off his head, he just, you know, digs it into his head.

Yes! He chops off his hand that's holding the scroll. The scroll! And the scroll falls limply to the ground with perhaps other things on his body as you stand in front of a portcullis that is down and no other way into this building that you can see. And we'll see you next week. Oh, man.

There's no way to heal The massive amounts of damage. Yeah, I'm not looking good. We'll see you next time, everybody. Pretty! Eat your beans. Eat your beans. Eat your beans. Eat your beans.

Eat your beans, everybody. Thanks for listening to the Glass Cannon Network. For more podcasts and live streams, visit glasscannonnetwork.com. And for exclusive shows and content you can't find anywhere else, subscribe today at patreon.com slash glasscannon. you