The Golden Hour - Aquamayne & LL Pool J | The Golden Hour #41 w/ Brendan Schaub, Erik Griffin & Chris D'Elia
Episode Date: August 11, 2023The guys talk Brendan in Austin with Joe Rogan, Alex Jones, Eddie Bravo and Bryan Callen, Chris' experience on Delta One, Robert Downey Jr. vs Jenna Ortega, Chris' review of Black Mirror, Logan Paul v...s Dillon Danis announced, a potential fight between Chris and Andrew Santino and much more! Get two extra episodes every month at https://Patreon.com/TheGoldenHourPodcast
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We're friends that laugh, we're friends that shout
Sometimes we don't know what we're talking about
But that won't stop us
Nothing can stop us
It's like a show you used to love
Just rebranded enough
It's stronger, better, bigger power
Cause it is the Golden Hour
It's the Golden Hour
Dude, Koss?
Yeah, dude?
Dude, that tattoo's great, man.
This one's great.
Oh, you want to talk about tattoos?
Well, dude, all mine look like something.
Should it be a cabin?
Yeah, it's rad. Yours, dude, about tattoos? Well, dude, all mine look like something. Should it be a cabin? Yeah, it's rad.
Yours, dude, that's just great, dude.
I was 17, dude.
When you got that?
Yeah.
What is it, a bill?
It's a cover-up, yeah.
Oh, that's funny.
Buffalo Bills, dude.
I like it.
Yeah, thanks, man.
Okay.
All right, dude, you got more.
You got tattoos.
Oh, you got a-
Mine are good.
I got them all in the last year.
No, you got a coffee maker on your-
Yeah, it's fucking so dope.
Oh, it feels good. I love tattoos, bro. you copy that tattoo off uh blue jam dude come on man
blue bottle that that logo is in blue bottle dude you're hopefully it's a sponsor hopefully
and they did pay me million i've never got a tattoo for a sponsor yeah according to ai
i don't know. It's odd.
He's acting all adult and shit.
I'm the only adult in this room.
So what's up? We're going? Or no?
We're always going.
What's up, dude? I feel like I haven't seen you guys in a while.
I know, but it's only been a week, but it does seem like that, huh?
Seems like forever, man.
What the heck, dude?
I say heck.
Were you on the road this weekend?
No, I was... What was I doing?
I had like a Irvine or something once or twice.
I can't remember.
Oh, yeah, you did like a whole SoCal Irvine brand.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Because I'm working on a new material.
But where the hell was I this weekend?
You were at home.
I was, but we did something.
I can't remember what it was.
You went to the grocery store.
No, we went to the beach.
Me and Calvin and William and Kristen, we went to the beach.
It was cute.
The beach is fun.
It's freezing for the kiddos.
It wasn't freezing, though.
The water's freezing.
Oh, the water was cold.
The Pacific, baby.
It don't stop.
It is.
Great White Central.
The beaches in LA are really not good, but we went anyway, and William's first time for
the beach.
Did he like it?
Yeah.
It's kind of terrifying for kids.
You put him in the water?
But he was just three months.
Yeah.
Oh, my kid's snorkeling and shit.
Oh.
At three months old, I let him snorkel around, dude.
Do you hold him?
I chum the water.
No, I just let him go.
Whoa.
Good luck, bud.
Whoa.
I'm like Terrence Crawford's mom.
That's crazy.
Do you see Terrence Crawford's mom?
I'd like your opinion on this.
Who's that?
Terrence Crawford is the pound for pound best boxer on the planet. He just won the biggest boxing fight. Terrence who? Terrence Crawford's mom? I'd like your opinion on this. Who's that? Terrence Crawford is the pound for pound best boxer on the planet.
He just won the biggest boxing fight.
Terrence who?
Terrence Crawford.
They're interviewing his mom.
Right.
They're interviewing his mom.
It's probably on TikTok.
They're interviewing his mom.
And they go, you know, how'd you turn Terrence into this beast?
She goes, since he was two years old, he'd ask me, oh, mom, I want to do this.
She'd go, and she goes, I'd tell him you ain't shit.
Every day, I'd tell him you ain't shit. And she she goes then i'd pay all the local boys in the neighborhood ten dollars
to fight him that's not good it's and it's very and you're like oh this is insane became the best
box on the planet terrible mother and then you thought terence crawford like yeah it is what it
is man he's like it was awful no yeah this was not cool i was a child that's terrible like oh
this is really sad and then she's over there like,
you're a champion of the world.
That's terrible. Was it worth it?
You're a champion of the world! Because of me!
But he's miserable, you know? And then she's like,
and I'll leave you on this note, you ain't shit.
You're like, alright, well. She said that?
No. Oh, wow, that would have been great. Can you imagine?
See, I'm world champion. She gets on the mic, you ain't shit
still. You still ain't shit. Yeah. Still got work to
do, bitch. You still ain't shit.
And he gets one of the new kids from the neighborhood $10 to fight him.
Just beat the shit out of the kid.
It's just other boxers.
You know what I mean?
And they're just like, what?
What is this?
Did you guys see?
I don't know if you saw it.
I know you guys wouldn't have seen this, but the governor is, I don't know if it's the
governor of Alaska or the mayor of Anchorage.
One of those.
Terrible gig.
No, he.
I think he's probably fine. He's. It's probably easy, right of those. Terrible gig. No, he... I think he's probably fine.
He's paying to send homeless people to Los Angeles.
He said it's cheaper to get a plane ticket
for homeless people to LA
because it costs $100 a day.
Brilliant.
So he's like, well, just for $300,
I can just send them to LA.
That's brilliant.
That guy's so smart. Yeah, but he's going to get killed. No,300, I can just send him to L.A. That's brilliant. That guy's so smart.
Yeah, but he's going to get killed.
No, he's not.
People from L.A. are going to go fly up.
They've been doing this.
Every state does this.
In the cold weather states, man, they just go, yeah, send him to, you know.
So that's why we have a situation.
But if you're a homeless dude and you're in Texas right now, you're just, you're flying.
Even if you're like, yeah.
But go to San Diego
It's way, like that weather
Yeah, but I think San Diego is way more
Stringent on like
LA's the spot, the weather's great
Never gets too hot, especially if you're by the beach
That's why Venice is popular
The weather's great
People are friendly
It's fucked up, huh, the homeless shit
I don't know if people are friendly
In Venice?
Yeah.
I think that there's like a – what we have going on here is that they're sort of like
I want to be a good person people.
They don't want to do anything necessarily about the homeless, but they also don't want
us treating them bad.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
So it's like this weird like –
It's also not our job.
Yeah.
No. Well, it's not. Hey, Newsome. Do something. Well, you like this weird like – It's also not our job. Yeah. No.
Hey, Newsome, do something.
Well, you know the thing is –
He's like, I did.
I gave him money.
But that's what the people in cold weather states,
they are obligated to do something because they can't just let homeless people die.
Die, yeah, right.
Because eight died last year in Anchorage.
So the guy was like, well, you know what we're going to do?
Yeah.
We're going to send them to L.A.
Because in L.A. –
$500, send them to L.A. Like in L.A. $500, send them to L.A.
Like in L.A., we don't care that they.
Just have them take a nine-leg trip, dude.
Have them take a bus and then swim over.
Yeah.
Dude, being.
How does a homeless person fly?
Like, how do you.
No ID, nothing?
Yeah.
You smell like shit?
Maybe they put them on spare airlines or something.
I mean, yeah, well, you wouldn't notice the smell difference if it was spirit.
Yeah, spirit just constantly fart.
When's the last time you've been on Spirit?
I went on once.
Sometimes you have to, right?
It's the one flight, y'all.
For a direct flight, yeah.
Hopefully nobody sees me.
Well.
You book it.
You get on with the hat like this.
You've got to get out of his shirt that says, this is the only direct flight.
Yeah, no, I did.
I did it once because it was the direct.
I remember that.
You do?
Yeah.
Where was I?
I don't remember where I was going.
It wasn't even. Was that with your flight? I forget what it was.
Was that Texas or something? It wasn't
really a, like it was not
a small city and shit. I was like, this
is the only one really? And I was like, I'm not connecting.
It was fine, you know, but I mean
it's a bus. It's a bus.
And they charge for everything. Like you want a seatbelt?
That's $50. It's a bus.
No, see the ticket is like $6.
Yeah, yeah.
And then everything else is like, to walk on the plane, $17.
To sit down, $65.
AC, $75.
Oh, you have a bag?
Oh my God, you have a bag.
You know what I'm saying?
$150.
But that's what happens.
That's how they get you, because you think like, oh man, this ticket is only $6?
I'll get, book it.
Your walk-on fee is $50.
Walk on what?
Walk on the plane.
I can't stand. I don't mind connecting-on another plane. I can't stand.
I don't mind connecting.
I'm not a big...
Really?
Yeah.
I don't care.
Connect me.
Nothing worse.
No, I'm flying,
because I fly the same airline
because I have my status.
I'm 1K on United.
Yeah, but that's how they get you, dude.
I ain't no bitch.
I ain't no bitch to get you.
Hey, I ain't loyal to these hoes.
I ain't no bitch to you.
Delta, United.
You bet, dude.
Hell yeah, dog.
I'm comfy. I'm not even thinking about it. You're not getting on the planees. I ain't no bitch. Delta, United. You bet, dude. Hell yeah, dog. I'm comfy.
I'm not even thinking about it.
You're not getting on the plane first.
Nobody claims us, dog.
Get on the plane first.
Dude, they drive me there on the tarmac.
I get there before the fucking pilot gets there, man.
On spirit?
Well, no, not spirit.
Thank you.
Delta One, dude.
You know what Delta One is? Oh, God. It's new. It's new? It's that new? You go there. You One, dude. You know what Delta One is?
It's new.
It's new?
It's a new new?
You go there.
You go Secret Way.
They check in.
You know what Delta One is?
It's like the people that go to Reno because they can't afford Vegas.
Oh, roast.
Explain.
Roast.
You doing Delta One is you like pretending like you're flying private.
Yeah, you ain't no better than us.
That's ridiculous though. You're still on a commercial flight but but hold on a second that's not a good uh
no it's not because you mr fucking when i talk about the matrix on
stage i'll come off he's like you know it's actually not you know you can't
i never the rules I can't. I never. The rules of the day. I have never pushed my glasses up.
When?
You know, it just makes me laugh.
The world you create on stage isn't the same.
Who is this person?
Who is that person?
That's who you are on the inside.
What were we talking about?
Yeah, dude, no.
I tell you what, though.
Delta One, it's really awesome.
It's like, I don't know how much it is, but you go and they fucking...
It's a whole buffet.
Before the plane, you chill.
United has the same thing.
They all got to have it now.
One of them asks, they all got to have it.
They take you down
an elevator, they put you in a Porsche,
and they drive you to the plane. You just drive
up. It's really awesome.
But it's only long distance.
Oh, is it?
No, no, no.
It says domestic long distance or international.
Oh, so the actual flight maybe,
but you can get the package at the airport,
which is still worth it, anywhere.
How do you get it?
You just pay for it, literally.
You just get your travel agent to be like,
I want to do the Delta One thing. How much is it
though? I honestly
I don't remember. I don't know.
I go like this. They say, it's going to be. I say, don't tell me.
Just charge it.
I'll only feel bad.
Because I'm going to do it.
That's why Kristen ends
up with nine Christmas trees.
Because you don't have a Christmas budget. See?
That's a good idea.
Christmas budget is the idea.
Oh, it says on there?
She knows she's watching right now.
She is really thrifty about it, though, man. She'll be like,
this was only this. I'm like, really?
How can you? What?
It's not thrifty
if you're doing it. well i understand thrifty is she
gets like they're so happy though dude i i know you get it but like i got a question for you
that ufc fighter that put the life rip yeah his mouthpiece yeah yeah no idea right you know you
have no idea i've known who he is now for a little bit because of the life yeah yeah yeah you know
he's ranked top 15 now yeah i know that no because. No, you don't. Because now, dude, he's at the log cabin.
When we create it, he's at the log cabin.
He's security?
People go like this.
He's security?
I go like this.
He'll handle the hiring of the security.
Like, this guy is legit going to be in the log cabin.
And if you pop off, Cody comes out.
Cody will keep you busy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, people don't want to fight.
No, I know.
We don't want to fight. It's all about peaceful shit. Log cabin? You never know. I'm saying, yeah. People don't want to fight. No, I know. We don't want to fight.
It's all about peaceful shit.
Vlog cabin?
You never know.
I'm saying these people are pro-fighting.
You didn't want to fight.
I know.
Exactly right.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
I don't know.
But then you have all your friends who are like, you want some of this?
Because my boy.
I'm like.
That was the life rips thing.
So I got to.
We're talking and I'm going to send this whole camp some shit.
But yeah.
You got some merch?
Yeah.
He's kind of won fans back.
One time he kind of embarrassed himself after.
Yeah, I saw.
I didn't.
What did he do?
After a fight, he beat a Chinese guy, and he's like, go back where you came from.
And everybody's like, you're kind of a dumbass.
But he's.
He's like, I'm from Irvine.
He's had super exciting fights.
He's kind of won some people back since.
Yeah, but dude, here's the thing.
When you're fighting, and I don't fight, but when you're fighting or when you're angry with somebody,
and I was just talking about this on my podcast, you got to say all this stuff.
No matter how, they're different.
You look at the differences.
And if I'm fighting a guy and he's not like me, I'm calling out the differences.
You can't go racist.
Don't care.
That's all part of it.
Fair is fair. You can't go racist Don't care That's all part of it Fair is fair You can't go racist
Dude
If I'm fighting
A short guy
Hey dude
Hey shorty
Short king
Fuck off
You know what I mean
If he's Asian
That's what's up dude
Oof
That's tough
Why bro
You gotta
You gotta pick the differences
It's actually equal opportunity
And it's very sweet to do that
Okay
You pull up You pull up in the Porsche
at a stoplight. Guy walks
out and you're like, you know, and he
fucking kicks your... He stomps
on your... It's an Asian fella? Yeah, he stomps
on your hood. He's Indian.
What do you think, bro?
Why does that have to be an Asian guy?
I said Indian. Pick anything. Go ahead.
He's Polish.
What are you going to think?
Hey, you.
Why are you going?
Come on.
Go ahead.
What are you going to do?
Let's say you find a black guy.
What are you going to say?
You know what I'm thinking.
Well, you know what?
Okay.
Well, you know what I can't say, bro, but don't kick my car.
I'm at least doing that.
You know what I'm thinking. But you just turn don't kick my car. I'm at least doing that. You know what I'm thinking.
But you just turn on a rap song where you hear that word a lot.
And then you go, and then every time it comes on, you point at it.
Ew.
No, it's hilarious, though.
Fucking, who had that bit?
Bro, I think it was, was it Dane? I don't even know, but it was like when he's playing video games he's
racist it was funny because he'll be playing tekken and he's like if he's asian like then
i'm racist again whatever it is but yeah man oh dude you should have seen i was in austin this
past weekend you should have seen your boy i went to dinner it's alex jones rogan eddie bravo me and
callan and callan was arguing with them that Jeffrey Epstein actually committed suicide.
I had my stay.
I sat back and went, why would you even?
10-6 round.
But why would you even?
Shouting match.
But listen to me.
Why would you even want to get into that with them?
Even if you believed that.
Because Brian's a CIA player.
That's the worst boy band ever right there.
You know what I mean?
Dude, that boy Alex Jones is worth all the money.
Well, so hold on a second.
Callan thinks that he killed himself?
Yeah.
Oh, wow.
Yeah.
Even I don't think that, and I'm not into any conspiracies.
Oh, I told Brian when we got in the car, I went, out of all the conspiracies, that one?
Yeah, really.
That's the hell you want to die on
You're not going to convince them
Even if I did believe that
I wouldn't bring it up
It's also four against one
I was going yeah bitch
Just Alex rattling off
I just kept going
I was in the green room
And Eddie Bravo was there
And he was like Did you vote for Trump or whatever I just kept going, you're tough. Dude, I was in the green room, and Eddie Bravo was there.
And he was like, did you vote?
You voted for Trump or whatever?
And this was like the first time he ran and shit.
And I was just like, I don't think I voted, honestly, because I was like, this whole thing is fucked up. But I was like, no.
And he was like, but you know, Hillary's a criminal, right?
And I was like.
Oh, here we go.
I was just like, oh, yeah, I don't know.
Maybe, I don't know.
Yeah.
Like, whatever.
What's the response to make this end?
Because like...
I'm going back to it.
Because you can't say I don't know.
I immediately think like, well, I'm not going to say what I think.
I don't even know what I think.
But like this has to end.
I don't want to engage.
Because you know what she did, right?
You know what she did?
And I was like, yeah, maybe.
I don't know, dude.
I don't know.
When you see Sam in the green room, like if he's like, dude, you know about Nancy Pelosi, right?
I go, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I just keep moving.
Otherwise, it's an hour before you're on stage of the deepest, darkest conspiracy you've ever heard in your life.
Well, I don't care to convince anyone.
And I also have definitely not read more about it than them.
But that means that – and I don't mean Eddie Bravo.
I mean anybody who is into
everything like this.
They've read everything.
And you can read anything.
You can read stuff
that only supports your side too.
Everything's out there.
Confirmation bias.
But the problem with Brian,
let's say we brought in
a flat earther in here.
All they do is argue that.
So the points we have,
because we're not arguing flat earth,
but they're going to light you up because they're used to all those arguments.
So you'll walk away like, damn, maybe that bitch is.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But for me, anytime I start talking to somebody, they're going that.
I always think if the tone is you're arguing this side
because you're arguing against the other side, I'm out.
Got it. That's a good point. I'm saying like you could support your side or be like you know i liked if you like trump you're like i
like trump because of this this this and this but when you're arguing the point to be like you know
well let me tell you how bad these people you know i just go ah i'm out i don't want to hear that
true that's some that's idiot shit that's why i don't like when when you see on wherever on
social media people are like oh man look at what he said this is stupid and then they're yeah there's always the
person that was like oh yeah but your guy the yada yada it's like all right dude you know what
that used to be when i when i wait but when i was growing up when i was growing up it always it was
always like that's how it was racial shit too oh how so it would be like if you're talking about
like i remember having this argument
my my white friend you know be like uh what was the arms well it was like you know you know black
people better athletes right facts right you know what i mean you can't come on at least especially
back in the 40s but it depends on the sport the 40s i'm saying white guys making a joke but then
it would be like,
did you have somebody who liked?
Because they weren't allowed.
Don't take it away from us,
you piece of shit.
Carry on, Eric.
Once Jackie Robinson came in,
people were like,
wait a second.
You lived in the past.
Okay, go ahead.
That's all right.
No, no.
I'm interested.
Nick, what do you got?
I'm interested.
What was the white guy saying?
No, but it would be like, if you, one side, then it would be like, well, but you know,
but white people are smarter.
Oh, got it.
Okay.
But my thing is like, if you're arguing something.
Yeah.
If you're, see, look at him.
Look at him.
Yeah, he wants to see.
Was that white guy me?
Was that us?
Was that us last week?
No, I'm just kidding.
No, but I'm saying like, if it's's like if you're – I can't stand this.
If you're talking about say whatever and then somebody brings up the other side of
the – well, but what about when this?
I go, okay, that's fine.
We can argue about that too.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But let's talk about this.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Like it doesn't – it's not one or the other.
Anytime it's one or the other, I'm like – and even like what we're saying even
like with politics.
If it's like – if we're going to go, right if if let's say if someone's anti-trump for instance you know
and they gotta be like well here's the things and they go well the other side i go yeah okay cool
let's finish with all the shit this guy did yeah yeah and then we could get to that but the thing
but people always take a stance of be like well he's the best thing ever, and the other side's the worst thing ever.
If you're arguing that, I'm out.
Yeah, I agree.
I agree.
They both suck. I am out.
Yeah, they both suck.
They're terrible.
So if you're arguing if this guy's evil and this guy's not, I'm like, check, please.
They're all evil.
They're all evil.
Let's have a real discussion.
Yeah.
And most people just can't do that.
Yeah.
And so you feel that bias, and you just kind of go – and that's why when a conspiracy theory starts going, you just – I think most of us are just kind of like, okay.
People that like – when I hear about a super successful person and then they're
buying into like – it feels like crazy.
Yeah.
I'm just like, ugh.
It is weird.
But someone like say –
Get me compromised.
But I'm saying – but someone say likelex jones i actually get being like that it's lucrative as fuck he's the face of conspiracy
i know but what i'm saying is i just signed a multi-million dollar deal today all you people
at home you're he's doing it's he's doing that for we i don't even know if he even believes all
agree i i wonder about that.
You know what I mean?
That's like that, like, you know, we know people like that where it's like,
are they doing it as a bit?
It's a comic.
The comic version is like, are they doing it as a bit or are they going to kill themselves?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know what I mean?
That's some dark shit, man.
No, but, dude, I don't believe, like, I don't believe, like, Sean Hannity, Tucker Carlson.
No, I don't believe them at all.
And all these kind of people.
I don't believe that. When I see you look at Forbes and you go
top, you know,
you go, oh, well, yeah.
Well, you made how much money? Yeah, I believe that
too. They're playing for teams.
They're playing for teams. Yeah. You made that much.
I make that much money too. I believe that too. I believe
that too. Yeah. So I'm like, sorry.
I don't care.
But with Alex Jones, you don't know though, because he really seems like he believes that shit.
I don't know him at all.
He has so much charisma.
He's such a smart dude.
Like, wicked smart.
Photographic memory.
Wow.
I think whatever Laney decided to go down, he'd been successful.
He just got onto this conspiracy stuff.
Good point.
And ran with it.
Now he's the face of it.
And he's been around for how many years?
25 years.
The face of conspiracies?
Use your powers for good.
I mean, I think there's a lot of people that use their, that use that.
Some would say he is.
In a wrong way.
Some would say he is.
Some say, like, this guy could have been Hitler over here.
You know what I mean?
For real, dude.
Me?
Just like, I'm just saying it's like.
If I had.
Because of cult?
Yeah.
I would have said Charles Manson.
If my parents went a different way.
Bro.
Oh, man. I mean, you got people, you're charismatic. Round them up. You my parents went a different way, bro. Oh, man.
I mean, you got people, you're charismatic.
You got people that are getting tattoos.
Round them up.
If you had Terrence Crawford, you ain't shit.
Think of what you would have done, dude.
Round them up.
Bro.
Start saying to your kid.
Round them up.
Oh, this is the conspiracy where Bill Hicks turned into Alex Jones.
That's so stupid.
If you're going to play the conspiracy game.
That's the stupidest thing.
Well, is it though?
That's hilarious.
Them boys make so much money.
Imagine if something like that was true.
The age isn't even right.
Like Bill Hicks would be, how old would he be now?
Yeah.
Yeah.
And Alex Jones was around when Bill Hicks.
I know.
I know.
Oh, dude, I fucked up at the dinner.
I was quiet just listening to Brian get obliterated.
And I was like, I need to get into this thing.
And I was like, dude, DeSantis, I heard he has funding from George Soros.
And Alex was like, what'd you say?
I'm like, what?
Why would you do that?
He was like, what'd you say?
And then it was like.
I'm like, wait, wait.
Back on talent.
He's a cuck.
I would drop some shit like that in just to see what happens, though.
That's what I was so bored.
I'm like, fuck it.
How about Soros and DeSantis?
Next time you hang out with Alex Jones, you just got to, when he's not paying attention,
get his attention, be like, Bill, and see if he looks.
Oh, yeah.
Mr. Hicks, you know what?
Gotcha.
And I'm filming.
I would like one of these sort of things to be true, like Elvis is 85.
Still alive.
Tupac is on an island.
Yeah, yeah.
Dude, I would- The shit he knows, though, whether it's true or not, it Elvis is 85. Tupac is on an island. Yeah, yeah. Dude, I would.
The shit he knows, though, like whether it's true or not,
it's so interesting.
The dinner's so interesting.
But the whole thing about Alex,
the thing that really fucking was, I think, wrong was,
and, you know, I don't know if he thinks it was.
Sandy Hook?
Yeah, it was just, it's horrible, man.
That's why I check out.
That's why I don't defend.
It's horrible, man, because these families,
people are still harassing these people.
And he admits that was a mistake.
Oh, he does?
Yeah, like a tough time.
Well, I mean, look, dude, you know what?
You see how far you can go.
Yeah, true.
It's like Kanye with Jewish people.
He clowned white people.
He clowned black.
He clowned Greek.
He's like, can I get away with this? Hold on, let me try the Jewish route. He's like, whoa, that's too far. My badowned white people. He clowned blacks. He clowned Indians. He was like,
hold on, let me try the Jewish route. He's like,
whoa, that's too far. My bad.
And they even got Jamie Foxx.
Jamie Foxx hates you. That's so stupid.
That's the dumbest thing ever.
It's like making a Kobe Bryant joke.
What?
You know?
There's a line too far.
Right after his death?
Or whoever, right?
What I'm saying is you don't know what it's going to like.
When that fucking from the Westworld woman said,
rest in peace, Kobe Bryant, but let's not forget he's a rapist.
The day he died.
This is a piece of shit.
Anyway, yeah, this is crazy.
This was crazy.
This was just-
They.
They.
Well, the Romans killed Jesus, according to the Bible.
The Romans did.
Well, whatever it is, I mean, all this guy has to do is culturally be like,
black people say they as like this kind of shit.
So you're being racist for fucking.
Well, how about this?
But it is, though.
How about this, man?
Fucking DJ Khaled does it all day long.
How about this?
Jeffrey Dahmer was white so
therefore white people are terrible right facts they all have heads in preachers yeah I'm just
saying it's like even if even if the guy that killed Jesus was Jewish oh I know yeah right yeah
so all of them are left to do it yeah it's like that whole thought process is just. It's so bonkers.
Listen, you're stupid.
Yeah.
All Italians are in the mafia.
I don't want to deal with people like that.
Nobody, here's the deal.
No, nobody, nobody who is actually a real person thinks that Jamie Foxx is anti-Semitic
for this, right?
But the problem is, and I don't think it's happening, but the problem is companies will listen to-
Hollywood.
Right.
Yeah, yeah.
But you see, Neo, because Neo came out and was like,
who?
Neo, the-
So Sick of Love songs?
The R&B singer?
Neo.
Hold on, let me call, let me do it.
But when you say Neo, I don't immediately think of Neo
because of how white you are.
So sick of love songs.
But this was in 2000.
And that's it.
2000.
No, he's on game shows and shit.
But he's in the news.
His career's over.
He's on a game show.
He's so big in Europe, though.
No, he writes a ton of songs.
Anyway.
Regardless, he came out and was like, I don't believe in transitioning young kids.
I have five kids.
Said that, and that was just his opinion.
And then he got all this backlash.
And then his PR team was like,
I apologize if I offended anybody.
And he was like, oh, hell no. And everyone's
like, don't apologize, Neal. It's okay to
feel that way. And then he got on there
and was like, listen, my
PR team sent that out. That is not how I feel.
It went hard in the paint.
Yes.
So that's not Neil.
That's his PR team released that after he said that.
What?
But then he posted a video and was like, I did not say that.
He's like, this is how I feel.
He's like, if I get canceled for it, fuck it.
He's so rich.
You know what the thing is?
I don't think either side believes in the things that they say.
I don't think when they get into a room like this and they're talking with their friends,
I don't think anybody believes that it's okay to be fat.
I don't think anybody truly believes that, like, you know.
Gender assignment with kids.
I agree.
I don't think when they.
Nobody actually thinks that.
This is an internet thing. And even on the other side, I don't
think people
truly believe that
Biden stole the election.
It's that kind of thing.
Whatever. What's this guy saying?
I get it.
What I do, what y'all have to say
about what I say, whatever. I normally
don't care because, like I said, opinions ain't special.
Everybody got one. However, this is something I feel very strongly on and I need y'all to hear
this from the horse's mouth, not the publicist's computer. So check this out. First and foremost,
I do not apologize for having an opinion on this matter. I am a 43 year old heterosexual man
raising five boys and two girls. Okay. That's my reality. Now, if my opinion offended somebody, yeah, sure. I
apologize for you being offended because that wasn't my intention. My intention is never to
offend anybody. However, I'm entitled to feel how I feel. I'm absolutely entitled to feel how I feel
the same way you are entitled to feel how you feel. I ain't asked nobody to follow me. I ain't
asked nobody to agree with me. I was asked a question, and I answered the damn question, okay?
I have no beef with the LBGTQIA plus community whatsoever.
He continued, but yeah.
That's the way to handle it.
That's what you do.
Well, you just see.
No, say no.
Fire that publicist.
How do you put them out without him?
You just need more of the society needs more of that.
Being authentic. No, but you need more of what the society needs more of that but being authentic you know we need more
of that but the thing too is that you need we need more of that from people other people of
influence yeah yeah yeah that's what we need more bending the knee to hollywood you need something
like that from the girl who played wednesday yes whatever her jenny ortega jenny ortega great
series am i right you know the fact that i got nominated for 13 emmys it's so good so Yes. Whatever. Jenny Ortega. Jenny Ortega. Great series. Am I right? No.
The fact that they got nominated for 13 Emmys.
It's so good.
It's so amazing. It's not that good.
It is.
Did you see it?
Hey, dude.
No.
Yeah.
Listen, you like shows about movies about lambs that turn into devils or whatever.
You don't get a vote.
It was good.
No, you don't get a vote.
No, no, no.
You don't get a vote.
You see it get bitched out.
It was good.
It was good.
No, you don't believe it.
I don't believe what?
It was good.
That's you. Dude, when you talk about believing. Let me tell you something. Tim Burton. I have Chris D'Elia. It was good. No, you don't believe it. I don't believe what? It was good. That's you.
Dude, when you talk about movies.
Hey, I'm Chris D'Elia.
Dude, Tim Burton?
Let me tell you something.
Tim Burton.
I don't like movies with a point.
I don't like movies with a point.
It's Tim Duncan, man.
But you got to do it like this.
Tim Duncan.
Dude, Tim Duncan makes movies.
It's a boring movie.
You know what?
I wouldn't say it's boring.
It's well done.
It's a boring movie, but really well done. be surprised It's a boring movie But really well done
Just like his career
Super boring
But it's well done
It won five Oscars
You're like
What the fuck
Tim Dunn gets out of here
So boring
Listen
But well done
Wednesday
Might be good
It's not
It doesn't deserve 13 Emmys
There's no
It doesn't know
Kiss my whole asshole
No no no
You know what your problem is
Your problem is
You're Mr. Like Once you find out People? Your problem is you're Mr. Like.
Once you find out people like something, you have to be Mr. Like.
Let me find out why I shouldn't like this.
Everyone loves Tulsa King.
Let me find the problem.
Everyone loves Tulsa King.
I watch Tulsa King.
It's fucking fantastic.
Not everyone loves it.
Everyone loves Breaking Bad.
I watch Breaking Bad.
It's fucking fantastic.
Breaking Bad's big, but Tulsa King ain't shit compared to Wednesday.
You know how big Wednesday is?
Because it's Jenny Ortega, dude.
What?
That's her name, right?
Yeah. It's the Addams Family.
She was fantastic in it.
Man, let me just
set something straight for you, dude.
You're doing legs, daddy.
Yeah, I am, dude.
Jesus Christ.
Oh my God.
I feel like you could teach a self-defense class
at the Learning Annex.
No, no, yeah.
No, no, no.
You have to attack me like this for me to tell you.
Why don't you like it?
I don't not like it.
He's never seen it.
Wednesday, you're not great in that role.
You're fine in that role.
He needs to see it.
You're so wrong.
All right, I'll watch it.
I'll watch it.
You're so wrong. I'll watch it. That's me dude
Like Sean Street do was it Sean Strickland exposed him? Yeah, he tried like doing against on strictly
Oh, you're talking about fucking people are out there playing
Like I am Sam
Please play full down syndrome
Sean what's his name? Penn.
He's just like... You couldn't do that today.
I know that, but that dude is killer.
You're going to tell me fucking
Wednesday is... Alright, I'll watch it.
I'll watch it.
That universe
is a hard thing to sell. Totally.
It's been done so many times.
It's not that. It's just what they represent.
It's a thin line. I was trying to add value. It's been done so many times And it's not that It's just what they represent It's a thin line
I was trying to add value
It's okay
You're right
It's fine
You're right
I guarantee she's fine
You got this
I guarantee she's fine
I guarantee she's fine
No she's fantastic
Yeah
That's fantastic
Bro alright I'm gonna watch it
And I'm gonna watch it strictly for that
And you know what I'm gonna do for you guys
No no you can't watch it now
Because you're biased
You know what I'm gonna do for you guys You're going in hot Can I finish You know what I'm gonna do for you guys I'm going to watch it strictly for that. And you know what I'm going to do for you guys? No, no. You can't watch it now because you're biased. You know what I'm going to do for you guys?
You're going in hot.
Can I finish?
You know what I'm going to do for you guys?
I'm going to watch it and I'm going to fucking be open-minded.
That's what I'm going to do.
I don't believe you.
You know what?
You're a bad friend for that.
I don't believe you.
You're a bad friend for that because I'm telling you the truth.
I don't believe you.
I believe you.
Look at you.
You have a devilish look on your face.
He believes me.
He just went like this, Brendan.
He went like this.
I still believe him. I still believe it. And I'm going to have it like this, Brendan. He went like this. I still believe him.
I still believe it.
And I'm going to have it like this.
And I'm going to have an open mind.
Nobody believes you.
It's well done.
I just, like, when I see fucking, you know, it's like, it's just horse shit.
Bro, that show, I have not seen that show, Beef.
I'm sure it's great.
I'm sure it's great.
But when I drive by a billboard that says, the most important piece
of art I've seen in years,
I go like this.
Fuck me in the mouth.
Fuck me in the mouth.
That's how I feel about the USA.
I'm sure it's great.
But come on, bro.
Fuck me in the mouth.
But that's because that's how you
campaign to win
Emmys and stuff like that.
I understand.
Everybody's hyperbolic when it comes to that kind of stuff.
And I know Steven, whatever his name is, they're great.
Here's what I reject from you is that you don't have to play fucking Down syndrome,
mentally challenged for people to go, oh, well, that guy's a great actor.
You're right.
You're 100. No.
You're 100% right.
You know who fucking, you know who killed it as a boring role? He played a boring person in a boring role in a boring movie, and he was fantastic.
Tom Hanks in that fucking movie Sully or whatever the hell it was.
That fucking movie was so goddamn boring.
He played a boring guy, and he fucking killed it.
Let me give you an example of what
jenny ortega did okay educate it reminds me of tropic thunder okay there's a fine line of that
blackface role that so that you can ignore what's happening because of how well he's doing it
and that's what and that's what it is because not everyone can pull that off. So what I'm saying is
No, you're right.
What I'm saying is
that performance
he's great.
Yeah.
Okay.
And what I'm saying is
I feel what she did
as that
it was pretty great.
I'm going to go
I'm going to go
a little bit further here
and you're going to
fucking want to
take my head off.
Robert Downey Jr.
was pretty good
in Tropic Thunder.
Not great?
Pretty good.
Get out.
Get out. Get out.
He was up for an Oscar.
I can't stand you for that.
Oh, he wasn't.
Was he?
Yeah, he was.
In blackface.
He was up for an Oscar.
Bring it up.
He didn't win, but he was up for it.
He shouldn't have been.
That's how good it was.
It was great.
He was pretty good.
I don't think anybody that saw that was like, I can't believe, because that was the point
of the-
He was pretty good.
No, I protested.
All I'm saying is there's moments... You put me in that role?
You don't even need to paint my face.
People believe it.
Oh my God, dude. Are you kidding me?
They go, they didn't paint his face at the end of the movie?
He's not black? No. And they watch the game and be like, they really didn't.
Stupid.
Weird.
It's like I knew what the fuck I was talking about.
Nominated, you dumbass. Imagine how much
the times have changed in just 12 years like that.
That's just crazy, bro.
They haven't made a good movie since?
Chaplin's great.
Great movie.
Well, he's great in it.
Yeah.
Charlie Chaplin.
Well, that was a BAFTA.
That wasn't...
No, no.
That was Oscar.
No, he was nominated for Chaplin for sure, yeah.
Oh, did he win?
Oh, no, he was nominated, yeah. Okay, he's a great actor. Just saying. No, he's a for Chaplin for sure, yeah. Oh, did he win? Oh, no, he was nominated, yeah.
He's a great actor.
No, he's a great actor, yeah.
I mean, now he's just playing Iron Man and everything.
Okay, first of all, don't just say it like that.
What?
Listen, the end game.
Hold on, I'm about to get mad.
Yeah, you take Robert Downey Jr. out of the MCU,
it would be trash like it is now.
Trash.
He was playing that part like you were like, he was working, man.
He was born to be Iron Man.
That scene in the end game where they find he's all emaciated and he's yelling at Captain America.
I was like, oh, this dude trying to win an Oscar doing this role.
No, no, no.
He takes shit serious. He was great, oh, this dude trying to win an Oscar doing this role. No, no, no. He takes shit serious.
He was great as Iron Man.
He really was.
And that's what I'm saying about that's how Jenny Ortega was.
They say that's why Marvel movies are done.
Like Endgame, that was legit the end of the game.
Yeah, that's the end.
Now they've got to revamp that bitch.
The worst day ever.
Me and Lil Shady are hurt.
They killed Iron Man.
Take Kevin Rick instead
That was the first day
It came out
And he spoiled it
Oh wow
Oh LeSean McCoy
The running back
Yeah
He was supposed to be on
Whatchamacallit
With Stephen A. Smith
I'm sorry
With Skip Bayless
He's supposed to be
The replacement
What?
No
He's not
They're doing
He's on Speak
I love this guy
He's on
I watched that show
I watched the show
He's on it
You would love him on With Skip Bayless, but he didn't get the gig.
This is like a matinee.
Richard Sherman did.
Well, you know the –
And Lil Wayne.
You know the history between Richard Sherman and Skip Bayless, though.
Richard Sherman came on first take and was going in on –
He kind of lit him up.
I remember that.
Oh, lit him up.
Lit him up.
He's like, you're a failure.
We're talking sports
You know what we're talking about
We were talking about this
And then you guys hijacked it
And it's all good
He lost a Lincoln sponsorship
Because of it
God
He got that much hate from it
Yeah it was like
A really big deal
Oh that's so stupid
He says it's a giant regret
In his life
Remember
Remember Colby Compton
He's a UFC fighter
And he's like super
You know
He's hated
He like plays the heel
He drove
Down the theaters
When everyone was waiting
And spoiled the ending
Oh that's terrible
Just shout it out
That's so shitty
Ruining our kids
Yeah it's not cool man
Dude
It was late at night
I think if you do it
A week later
It's okay
But the day of
Close to it
Yeah no no
I know
Even if it's close to a day
It's like dude
I don't like when
Something's out for at least a month
And let's say we've all seen it
And we talk about it And let's say you've all seen it. And we talk about it.
And let's say you have me.
No, no, no.
Don't spoil it.
No, that's annoying.
But that's you.
You do that.
Me?
Yeah.
With what?
You don't watch things.
No, no, no.
But talk about it.
I don't care.
By the way, I've been meaning to say this.
I finished Black Mirror.
So good.
The first episode was terrible.
All the other episodes were definitely worth watching.
Correct.
The first one, you're like,
God, this is long drawn out.
You're normally wrong.
Is this the point we're trying to make?
Well, no.
I said the first episode was terrible.
The fucking all of the rest,
and then I was like,
I'm not watching.
I said the second one was pretty good.
And then you're like,
keep watching.
I'm like, okay.
They were all good.
Yeah.
They were all good.
I don't know why they kicked it off with that.
The first one was terrible. Yeah. And then. Too were all good. They were all good. I don't know why they kicked it off with that. The first one was terrible.
Too long.
The second one was very good.
And the Aaron Paul one was like gangster good.
That's my favorite.
And then all of them were good, though.
Yeah, when he kicked the chair out in that Aaron Paul one.
Yeah.
What's up, man?
Yeah, I guess we're all the same now, huh?
That's fucked up, dude.
But I like the Macy Day one.
Which one was that?
That's the one where they-
Turns into a werewolf?
Yeah.
Oh, I like that one, too.
Because for me, it's very much like those Korean movies where you think it's about something.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
I had no idea.
I had no idea.
I love that.
I love that.
I know.
All right.
I guess that's-
We're done, huh, Nick?
What do you got, Nick?
Did you guys see The Race War? Yeah, we did. I know. All right. I guess that's an inkling. We're done, huh, Nick? What do you got, Nick? Did you guys see the race war?
Yeah, we did.
I didn't see this.
You didn't see this?
I see everything.
It's making the internet go crazy.
There's so many memes about it.
So let me get this straight.
White guys attack a black guy?
Yeah, who was working at the dock.
He just asked them to move their boats, and they start beating on this black guy.
And then?
He sent out a bat signal.
He threw up his hat.
That's very funny.
Oh, and that's the bat signal?
The person who did the bat signal?
I don't even know why he did it,
but people are saying it's the bat signal for black people?
Bro, that's so funny.
And then they all come?
Yeah, one guy jumps off the boat,
and you'll see he starts swimming.
Yeah.
But this went on for?
The names that they're giving the guy who swims up is fucking hilarious.
Aquamane.
Who's the guy swimming?
Aquamane.
LL Pool J.
LL Pool J.
Yeah, dude.
They're so funny, bro.
I know.
I know.
Wait, what else?
Oh, shit.
Look at him go.
Bro.
Jemichical phelps
now it's getting racist
i don't like it either
it's like if you want something to sound racist have nick read it
and they and they beat the shit out of the white guys? All the white guys did?
Good for them.
Pretty much, yeah.
I mean, Aquaman.
And he's 16?
Hold on, hold on.
Black Aquaman, JJ Fish.
Michael B. Feltz, dude.
Captain Hook.
Catfish Cuss.
21 Tilapia.
Oh, man.
Shaquille O'Gills.
That was just dumb. Yeah, that was that. Somebody's dad came up withapia. Oh, man. Shaquille O'Gills. That was just dumb.
Somebody's dad came up with that one.
Shaquille O'Gills.
He's only 16, too.
He body slammed that dude, right? That was that dude?
Well, I mean... It's actually...
It's so rare, I think,
that it's an...
This was like a, almost like
this is
something that would happen in prison.
You know what I mean?
That one is so funny.
But dude, you gotta go to
West Side Story. You wanna see this all the time, you gotta go to Fight Haven.
I've talked to you guys about Fight Haven before.
I muted it actually on Twitter because I was sick of seeing people
die. Yeah, Fight Haven is the one
man. They always got this kind of stuff.
The only difference between this and what
usually happens on the internet is it's usually
a black family at a barbecue.
What happens? They're just fighting
with each other. Or they're at Disneyland.
I enjoy those. With white people?
No. Oh, just got it. I thought it was a race thing.
But they do have some of those,
but a lot of times it's just people acting up.
Bro, this one
when they go, assemble.
Did you see that one? It's timed so
God damn, it's so funny, bro.
Why is everyone out of shape?
Fight Haven follows me and they only follow 678
people. I'm kind of proud right now.
Good job, Nick.
But I'm sure they had this on Fight Haven.
I'm sure, you know. Oh, like kicking
the street fight? So what is this?
It's just a bunch of fight videos. It's like sure, you know. Oh, like kicking the street fight? So what is this? This is like a.
Oh, it's just a bunch of fight videos.
It's like Worldstar-esque.
Oh, that lady's eating a tarantula.
People get legit hurt.
Yeah, man.
Yeah, I can't watch it.
It'll be a lot of like teachers getting hit.
I can't watch it.
There was one.
But there was one.
Those teacher fights.
No, but there was one where this teacher.
These kids were fighting, right?
And they hit this female teacher.
And this one black kid like goes in on them he he like pushes the other one clocks the
other one in the face and he was like you don't do that it was you don't do
that without me yeah people's elbow there's a lot of crazy like you know
security guard guard yeah the by a skater.
The girl fights are the worst when they're pulling hairs and tits and ass popping out.
I don't like that.
That brawl in the ocean really made me sad at first, but the more you watch, there was a lot of really funny parts in the video.
There really were.
Of what?
Which one?
The one with the boats.
Oh.
Just lots of happening.
This is not funny.
Street fights are tough, man.
There's nothing funny about it.
You hear about people all the time getting clocked
at a bar, they hit their head,
die and shit. You're like, what the fuck?
So what happened in the end is all these
Waidus got their comeuppance?
I guess so, yeah.
Did they murder them? Well, here's the thing, too.
I heard That they
That they were in town for like a Trump rally
And it was the day before
That's probably fake right?
Maybe
But if that's true
They were like ready
They're trying to say they're Trumpers
Probably not
I mean they're obviously Trumpers
They obviously voted for Trump
Look at them
I know but what's dumb about that is
They forgot how Trump used to hang with rappers
and-
Yeah, well-
He had street credit.
Yeah.
The dude was on TV and-
Yeah, all the black people voted for Trump too.
It's like, what are you talking about?
They're acting like this, oh my God.
Those are the ones I'm saying is like, those are the dumb people.
And is this in a small town Montgomery
Alabama try that my town
oh well that sucks that was a lot
of the black people were
saying that try that my town yeah yeah
I'll try that my town yeah
because they've got because they tried in the town they got their
ass whoop got it
but yeah that was the big
anybody that does that kind of stuff anyway
it's like they should get beat up.
No matter what race, just get your ass beat up.
Yeah, I agree.
For me, I don't care about the whatever.
It's like whoever was being dumb should get their ass beat up.
No, of course, yeah.
Of course.
Boy.
This guy wasn't there.
That's how I am.
Pac Zillow.
That's how I am, dude.
I'm like that.
Like what?
Buff like that.
Before we check him out, here is one of the guys who got beat up.
Is this real?
Yeah.
He's actually a guy who got beat up?
I saw this.
I thought he was making a joke.
I wasn't sure either.
Okay, go ahead.
What?
Fucking throw him.
Five-year-old man could really fucking throw him.
He said that 65-year-old man could really fucking throw him.
He got his ass whipped.
Yeah.
Did you see that baseball player, Tim Anderson, get fucking clocked?
Yeah.
Like, you know, baseball, there's never fights.
This dude, Tim Anderson, I did a show with him one time.
Baller.
Super best player on the Chicago White Sox.
He goes like this, and they're swinging.
Dude, boom.
Bro, the dude who hit him goes like this.
Yeah, not't look But still
He got lucky
It sucks with Tim Anderson
Cause
He's not gonna be able
To live that one down
And he's a baller
But people still
Watching baseball
Yeah but
I love baseball
Don't fight
Don't fight
Don't fight
A Dominican
Oh my god dude
Like no
Don't fight a Dominican
The bad thing is
He picks the fight
Yeah he got six
He got six games He got six games
He got six games
Suspension
The other guy got three
Who got picked
Who got picked
The guy who fell
Who got knocked out
He got the longest
Wow
But he starts off
Like he's squaring up
And you're like
Damn Tim Ansell
Is like in fight
Then boom
Like ah that's not good
Yeah
You wonder if it was
The guy holding him back's fault
You know it's like
You know what's crazy
The Angels have
Probably
Like When it's all said and done,
could be the greatest baseball player to ever play.
Your team?
No, like this dude.
The Japanese baby.
This dude.
Shohei Otani.
Yeah, this dude's probably the greatest.
The other day.
He's not in there.
No, no, no, I'm saying.
Hashtag no racism.
My son calls him Sushi Otani.
He just can't get it.
I get it. The other day, the other day the guy hit. I'm saying. Hashtag no racism. My son calls him Sushi Otani. He just can't get it. I get it.
The other day, the other day the guy hit.
I'm not saying hamburger.
The other day the guy hit two home runs.
In a back-to-back games, he hit a one hitter.
He pitched a one hitter and hit two home runs.
Whoa.
Okay.
No one goes to the games.
Okay.
You understand what I'm saying?
They suck.
It doesn't matter.
Stop Asian hate.
That's right.
No, no, but I'm saying it don't matter.
There's certain teams in other sports that even when they suck,
people go watch the sport.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
There's sucky NFL teams, but it's packed because we love football.
Aren't they in Anaheim?
It doesn't.
What I'm saying is baseball, can it even survive?
Not in Anaheim.
Is it going to survive?
Baseball survives.
And the Dodgers, the Padres, it's packed.
Yankees cleveland packed la
this is in boston it's like yeah yeah it's anaheim it's the market orange county kind of
market they don't give a fuck they get they get really high tv local tv contracts like
to have the show the boston games that's where their money's at in advertising
not in the tv deals yeah they don't give a fuck about ticket sales. Yeah.
It looks terrible, though.
This guy's out here wrecking it, and there's like seven people in the stands.
I saw him, and they're cheering for him like crazy when we're at the stadium.
In Orange County.
But they sell, everywhere he goes, they sell out.
It was packed.
If the Angels play the Seattle Mariners, it's all Asian in the crowd.
Where are you going to be?
Looks like a-
Tons of it.
Remember that one?
We'll be in Charlotte coming up, Little Rock, Arkansas,
and Knoxville, Tennessee, and then Canada coming up.
ChrisLeah.com.
Get them tickets, baby.
I'm in Phoenix this Friday.
Two shows.
Stand up live.
Phoenix, then Omaha, Nebraska, and Kansas City next week.
Don't dismiss it.
Wednesday, Thursday.
Boop.
Touch your wiener.
Yeah, it doesn't matter that you're going to be there.
Okay, see ya.
That's your long standing joke dude
I know
I told you that time
When I walked out
This guy trying to get
Titty fucked
I had a Batman shirt on
I walk out of the
OR
Off stage
And he's standing
In the hallway
With his phone
Like yeah
He had a Batman shirt on
That's hilarious
I was ready for it Yeah yeah He was just ready He was just standing there I was like What's he doing Yeah yeah Batman shirt on. That's hilarious.
I was ready for it.
He was just ready.
He was just standing there.
I was like, what's he doing?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Pretty much he had a Batman shirt on.
It's like, okay.
So stupid.
Such a piece of shit, man.
Let's see what Captain America has to say.
What's up, Golden Hour?
Travis from Palm Beach, Florida.
I've been on the show a bunch of times.
Look at that shit. I'm listening to you guys talk about hospital beds right now.
Like a gorilla.
Complaining about it.
And I opened a cabinet, and now I have a complaint.
So what do you guys do when your wife opens bags?
I don't even understand.
And then I pull this one out.
Does this count as clothes?
Oh, I see.
That's definitely stale, right?
Can't they just clip it?
Yeah.
I hate that popcorn.
Gang, gang, buzz, buzz, soar.
Tits.
I'll say this, dude.
And I saw somebody say this once.
Why are they not partnering?
Like, make it a Ziploc thing.
Why do they all have fucking shitty?
Expensive.
Yeah, but there has to be some sort of deal you can work out.
It's so fucking annoying.
Yeah.
You got to get the chip clips.
You're 40 years old, though, right?
You'll figure it out.
Well, I don't eat this bullshit.
My body's a temple, but, like, I don't understand.
It's just the casualness of it.
You know what I mean?
It really annoys me.
My body's like a temple.
Guys are coming in and out of it all the time.
But I don't understand.
Religious guys.
Yeah, you know what?
This annoys me a lot right now.
Your girl leaves the bag open?
Oh, no. This is. Like, you know. Your girl leaves the bag open? Oh, no.
This is Rachel yesterday, you know.
I come home, and she's like, hey, babe, you have a mess you have to clean up.
Yeah.
You know?
Well, now.
Right.
You know what I mean?
She's like, I say, what happened?
You know, I find that she, first of all, she made four eggs, burned them.
Wow.
Damn, she can't even cook eggs.
No, dude.
Scrambled?
I don't know what she did.
Because that's crazy if she burned scrambled eggs.
All I know is that I come in, and it's like the fire alarm's going on.
It's that kind of thing she'll do.
But it's just a mess.
And I go, so you can make a mess, but you can't clean up the mess?
I mean, to be fair, it is easier to fucking make a mess.
It's like, the baby.
Oh, God.
I hope you don't talk that way to our...
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, my God.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, everything's like, do you even love me and the baby?
It's like, don't bring the baby into this.
Not even here yet.
What else you got, Nicholas?
You guys want a really depressing update on the Island Boys?
Yes.
Oh, one sucking the other off, right?
Yeah.
I'm sure it was fake.
Look at that, dude.
That's fake. That's fake. It's probably fake but is it
Ante though, you know, there's something about they gonna do next kill you know that
There's something about leaning into like two trolls and also just being like yeah, but this why this don't makes you feel sick
Why?
Yes, dude looks like he's holding a carrot.
Bro, because the problem is now you're thinking about Jay, he's thinking about Matt.
It wasn't until that happened at all.
At all.
Listen, you know what?
We're not even going to mention Matt's cock in your mouth at all.
You know, you just pounding Jay.
How did they decide who was going to get on their knees and do that?
He's like, hey, if we're going to troll, you got to get down and pretend you're sucking my dick.
He's like, no, you fuck.
Okay, let's just.
How did they decide?
Hypothetical.
No.
No.
Hypothetical.
Who's doing it?
I'm out.
I'm out.
If it was, you know what I mean?
I don't want to play this game.
Which one?
Who would?
I'd rather suck his.
Well, yeah, no shit.
I'd be all over you I know you would dude
I'd be sucking Brendan
Built this city
No
We built this city
I like that it was on a plate
I like that Chris puts the balls on a plate
And then the And I say dinner like dick Dinner served I like that it was on a plate. Yeah. I like that Chris puts the balls on a plate. The balls. Pow.
And then the.
And I say, dinner served.
And he's just.
Elon Musk comes in.
He's like, billion dollars on the table.
Whatever you want me to do.
Yeah.
Legit, whatever you want. He walks Matt in a little lingerie.
Okay, well, no.
I don't think I would do it with my brother.
I'd say with him.
For a billion?
You couldn't get over it?
Ankles up.
Jay would get it for a billion.
Ankles up.
Dude, I'm going baby style.
I'd say a billion dollars, daddy.
You can't even do that anymore.
What do you got, Nicholas?
Former linebacker Blake Martinez martinez he made 11 million
dollars his first year in retirement selling pokemon cards but he just got banned from like
the biggest exchange for evidently scamming people but did he still get his money yeah yeah
oh no and from what uh selling pokemon cards on whatnot some some like exchange for cards So can they not go after him now for the money?
Is he like, sorry, bitch, you bought it.
I don't know.
So they weren't real?
No.
Oh, man.
He was selling fake Pokemon cards.
Hilarious.
Yeah, that's just like NFTs.
Well, at least you can hold them, but yeah.
Do you see how Jake Paul, he spent $672,000 on an NFT.
It's now worth $13,000.
I think it was Logan Paul.
Logan Paul.
Yeah.
Logan Paul just announced a fight today too.
I know you guys don't give a fuck.
Who is it?
Dylan Dennis.
They're going to fight?
Yeah.
Really?
I bet Dylan Dennis falls out.
Box?
Yeah, just boxing.
Yeah, because that's the thing about.
He's going to fight a real boxer now, right, Brendan?
No, why?
Well, no, you don't have to, but that's... I guess it doesn't matter.
But hold on.
Let me just ask this question because I don't know.
Jake Paul, you put him in a ring with an actual boxer.
He loses, right?
Okay.
That's what I thought.
Like a high-level boxer?
Yes.
Yeah, but that's who you fight.
Like a guy at his level?
No.
Of course, right. No, I understand
he's good for however long he's been doing it, but
my point is, you put him with
somebody who's an actual boxer. I don't get that
argument. Like, that's the
knock on Jake. Like, oh, he's not being real boxers.
Okay. No, I... Who cares?
I don't care. I don't care either.
He's making money, and there's a market for it,
and that's great, and he should be doing what he's doing.
If I'm Jake Paul, I'm not going to not gonna fight fucking yeah but why do it yeah totally i
guess because then there's no more money to be made correct after that you're like oh he lost
box at his level have zero fame zero followers no one's gonna tune in right it'd be like if
keeping up the mma guys right massive fan right if the lakers played us right you know what i mean
yeah you know what i mean and then Patreon. And people are watching it.
Yeah.
And paying for it.
Yeah.
And then the audience is like,
oh, why don't you play the Clippers?
Like, why?
We're making more money
playing these dumbasses.
So the issue is like,
well, to me it's like,
look, you know what this is about?
It's about the integrity
of the sports.
You know?
And it's like,
only certain sports have,
they care about that.
But that's assuming.
There's no integrity in boxing.
But that's the perspective. Like, you're assuming if you watch terence crawford neural spence that that's
the similar product this is completely different yeah because i don't even know who those guys are
there you go exactly and those two best on the planet right they fought a week prior and people
like well look at that it's like this is completely different how many times do i have to say this
about these these boxers dude guys get on social media jake paul has shown people
the way it's like you gotta like be you gotta be get a publicist and do all that what's his name
the reason why i know fucking um no no i well yeah social media yes that's a good point but
i was going to talk about d d on dion no the big big dude Deontay Wilder Is because of the
To this day
That meme
That's how I found out about him
Get down there
But let me ask you this though
Do you think it's
Is that a bad look
For Nate Diaz though
His wife is fucking
It's bad
So it just doesn't
Nobody cares
Yeah she's great
The
Like pure boxing
As the MMA
Community are gonna hate on
But
That's what I was saying
On the shop show
My wife's hot as fuck Like people will argue Yeah People are gonna argue boxing as the MMA community are going to hate on. That's what I was saying on the shop show.
People will argue.
People are going to argue like, Jake, this is
stupid. It's fake. And they're going to
argue, oh, fighter pay. But then
he's paying these guys legit money.
The biggest paydays they're ever going to have.
So we should be celebrating. That's why I don't get
that. It makes no sense to me.
And Nate Diaz lost, but he lost in a very Nate Diaz way.
He stayed cool. He put Jake in a
guillotine in the last round. His fans still think he won?
Like, if this was a street fight, you're like, alright.
Oh, well. But that's the thing. Jake said
he wants to do an MMA.
He would lose in 30 seconds.
Yeah. Right? So, because
what Nate said was true.
He's like, he might beat me in boxing.
Doesn't mean he can win in a fight. Correct. Well, I mean. He's like, he might beat me in boxing. It doesn't mean he can win in a fight.
Correct.
Or whatever.
Well, I mean, that's like you learned that boxing isn't just swinging your arms and having some kind of street fight.
I mean, there's like real.
No, it's a legit sport.
It's a sweet science.
Yes, a science to it, right?
So it's like that.
Yeah, so that's what I mean.
Now, if Nate would have went in there and got fucking knocked out cold in like five
seconds, that would have hurt his brand.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But the way it went, yeah, they both won.
Well, that would have made me.
Punches and punches.
But here's the thing, though.
If he goes in and beats some fighter.
So Nate Diaz is a fighter.
Jake Paul beats him in five seconds, like you say, right?
That's bad for Jake Paul because then we're like,
yo, dude, you have to now fight a real
boxer. Right, right. It's bad for him too. He needs
these fights to be like, oh, it was a
great fight. That's true. That's true.
There's a little WWF element to it.
I'm sure with
McGregor and Mayweather,
Mayweather could have ended that
shit early,
but he was like,
there's $100 million on the line here.
Let's put on a show.
I don't like that.
You think?
Oh, yeah, dude.
He could have wrecked him.
Hold on.
Why is that better to put on a show?
You want to give the fans a show
instead of just going there and destroying it.
Oh, you know how many times people have paid for pay-per-view
and then they're disappointed?
When Tyson used to knock guys out
in 18 seconds,
people called HBO or whatever
and wanted their money back.
Oh, really?
Like, we got family
and friends together.
We cooked fucking food
this last 15 seconds.
Really?
And HBO's like,
what do you want us to do?
No, no, in the first part...
Fight again, fight again.
In the first parts
of the Tyson pay-per-view,
we were fine with it.
It was the later ones.
Remember the one with the white guy?
Bofa?
No.
What was that guy's name?
Who?
Nick.
You know.
Tommy Gunn?
Tommy Morrison.
Tommy Morrison.
That was the one that people were like, nah, we're good on this.
Why?
Because it was a terrible fight.
The guy just gave up.
He quit.
And it was like people were paying all this money.
That's not what we paid for.
What?
Fuck, what was I going to say?
So I don't know.
I mean, it's like when he was fighting, when he fought that basketball player,
I was like, dude, you've got to fight somebody better than this.
Did Mayweather?
Dick Paul killed somebody.
Did Mayweather fight Logan Paul?
Is that in my memory?
Yes.
What?
I didn't even hear anything about that one.
How was that fight?
Not good.
It was...
Yeah, but they went to the district, right?
But it was an exhibition match.
I worked the broadcast.
Okay, so then...
So if you did that...
You didn't see it?
No, I think I might have seen it.
I just spent so many fights.
You saw me.
But what is the deal with Mayweather?
He's just doing it for a paycheck.
Right, but Mayweather, I mean, of course,
Logan Paul is much bigger than Mayweather,
so Mayweather held back or what?
He's older, too, and Logan's big and avoided the punches.
That's the greatest defensive fighter of all time.
Right, right.
I understand that's his thing.
I get it.
It was an exhibition.
What about the Tyson Roy Woods Jr.? Yeah, yeah. Not Roy Woods Jr. was an exhibition. What about the Tyson-Roy Woods Jr.?
Yeah, yeah.
Not Roy Woods Jr.
Roy Woods Jr.
What would it be with Roy Woods Jr.?
That'd be fun.
Yeah.
Tyson and Roy Jones Jr.?
Yeah, Roy Jones.
That was also like a glorified sparring match.
That's what I'm saying.
It wasn't real.
Well, they didn't want somebody to get hurt.
Yeah, they're both like 60.
I mean, Mike Tyson is a fucking...
He's still a monstrous man.
A monster, bro.
You don't want him to swing.
This look on your face.
You think you could beat up Mike Tyson?
In a street fight?
In a street fight, maybe.
He's way younger.
I know Jiu-Jitsu, too.
He doesn't know shit.
In boxing, he'd beat the fuck out of me.
But in an MMA match?
It's not an MMA match.
In front of 7-Eleven.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
It's more of an MMA match than it is a boxing match.
Yeah, boxing would fuck me up,
clearly. I know.
Anything goes.
It's on the record right now
that you could beat up Mike Tyson.
He probably could. Yeah, he probably could.
In a fucking street fight.
I did get offered a legit fight, though.
You did? Yeah, recently. Oh, really?
Who's trying to beat you up?
I don't think so, no.
An MMA rule?
Bare knuckle MMA fight.
Wow.
That allows head stomps.
That allows?
They offered your boy money.
Whoa, dude.
Tell me who he is afterwards.
Well, you know what I think money is, bro.
Bro, I got more winks than you
do, dude. Hey.
What is happening right now?
We're talking moolahs.
Yeah, but bro, bro, bro, bro.
I got waves.
This fight's flying delta one over here.
Would you take a bare knuckle fight
with head stomps for, I don't know,
five mil?
With who?
Like a fighter?
Like Logan Paul.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But you could get more money than that.
Right now?
I'm telling you right now.
Well, that's Logan Paul doing the heavy lifting.
If I had to fight Andrew Santino, how much are we talking?
2 million.
Would I fight Andrew Santino?
Two million cash.
Sure.
I think it'd be a fucking – for life.
It'd be such an idea for a lifetime to do that anyway.
Oh, my God.
You're so fucking stupid.
I would buy that.
Fuck it.
You'd buy it.
Yeah, I'd buy it.
Oh, my God.
It would be the fight of the century.
That'd be sick. No, but what I'm saying is, my God. It would be the fight of the century. Damn sick.
No, but what I'm saying is like, you think of the like, there would be a thing too.
If Logan Paul was like, I want to beat up Chris D'Elia.
Yeah.
You know?
And then it would be like.
Okay.
Yeah.
Okay.
You know?
Then a pay-per-view.
I'm trained so hard.
Then you get like 30.
If it's only like, what would the thing be?
It'd be like, you only got 25% of the thing.
It'd be generous.
It'd be generous, right?
Yeah, for him, yeah.
Yeah.
But it's like, great.
I'll take 10.
You know?
You'll take 10%?
Yeah, on a fight like that?
It might be a $50 million fight.
What do you think, Brendan?
Wait, I just want to tell you something right now.
This is my favorite version of him
Why?
I wish you were more like this
When we're talking about other things too
Because he's so
It's all in his head
It's so funny
You're like an evil villain right now
When we talk about fighting stuff
You turn into a whole different person
But to fight
Because I know what I'm talking about.
The rest of the stuff, I don't.
That's funny.
You know what's crazy though?
Here's the irony.
I have to fake it.
The stuff you know about, you don't say shit.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, fair.
That don't even make sense.
That's so funny.
That's called podcasting.
Now I want you to talk.
Yeah, I know.
And I refuse to.
That doesn't even make sense.
No, you'd have to.
For a guy like me, you'd have to do like, I'd have to fight Andrew.
That's the obvious one that I would have to do.
That would be my first fight.
Remember when it goes on to, you know.
So there's YouTube wars.
Why not podcast wars?
There was a fucking thing like three years ago.
Theo was calling me.
He's like, man, we got to do like a fucking WWE.
Remember when you do that WWE shit?
He was like, man, we got to do it, man.
We got to all wrestle.
I'm like, really?
He's like, yeah, man.
I think we can make millions.
In a real wrestling match, Theo, Chris, sort of MMA loose rules.
Who you got?
Who you honestly got?
Chris did jujitsu For a while
I would win
Here's the thing
People sleep on Theo
Theo's way more athletic
Than you think
No I understand
Way more athletic
But if you're talking about
When you saw him on road rules
In those competitions
That motherfucker
Was beating the Miz
Oh yeah
Like Theo's no punk
He has that
The big haunches
He has that big southern ass
Back in when he's never
Met a black person days
He's just saying the N word
A little too loosely
Yo Yeah but But you know I reckon when he's never met a black person days. He's just saying the N-word a little too loosely.
Y'all.
Yeah, but, you know, street fight, who knows?
But if you do like, I don't ever know about street fight.
I don't know.
I don't know how much. I'd watch it, though.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But what I'm saying is, it's crazy.
Who would Eric fight, though?
Who would Eric fight?
I'd fight Bobby.
Roy.
I'd fight Bobby Lee.
Roy.
Roy. Oh. Roy.
What about Louis C.K.?
You versus Louis?
I'm not a fighter, dude.
No, I know.
Neither is Chris.
Neither is Louis.
Nobody is here.
He did jiu-jitsu.
Yeah, but I did, though.
The most fun I've ever done is when I was doing some boxing training.
You know what I mean?
I was like, all right.
There's a lot of money.
Let's say Spotify was like, hey, we have $100 million.
You need to put on a card.
We call it Podcast Wars.
I'm in.
It's the three of you and then three others.
Robert Kelly.
Now fuck Robert Kelly.
I just like saying that.
I fight Chin.
Yeah.
Again.
No, since we're on the same, you'd have to fight Jamie.
Oh.
Jamie's jacked.
Did you see him in the picture?
Is he actually?
He has to be.
Oh, my God.
You think he can walk in and Rogue can see him and not be like, you know.
Rogue can be like, 10 push-ups now.
You know what I mean?
Let me see.
Did you get in the cold tub today?
Oh, shit.
That's him?
Yeah.
Oh, he got big.
Plays a lot of golf.
Yeah, I'm not fighting Jamie.
I didn't know
he was that big. But if you beat him,
you get to
take his job. Now you're over there with Rogan.
I wouldn't leave you guys.
Ah.
He sounds like you.
I don't even know.
It's creepy.
You know I'm here for the long haul. You know I want to Aw, guys. You know I'm here for the long haul.
You know I want to stay here forever.
You know I'm here for the long haul.
Oh, man.
I kind of want to put this out.
I want to see some of these fights.
I mean, I can't fight, but I'll be the promoter.
I don't want to fight unless it's so much money.
If it's so much money, I'll do it.
Someone's going to back up the Brinks truck, buddy.
Yeah, it has to be so much money.
You know what the thing is?
Cal would have to fight.
The hype of it would be better than the actual event.
That's all fighting now.
Yeah, yeah, that is true.
For the most part, Cal.
I wonder how much I can get.
No, but the hype for you fighting Santino would be like, oh, my God.
You know, the comic wars.
Just keep going and never actually fight for years.
It's coming.
That's kind of what Dylan Dennis does.
Well, that's Elon and what's he called?
Dude, did you see fucking?
Elon's like, I need surgery.
I'm out seven years.
Dude, the other dude is like, that dude is jacked as fuck.
Zuckerberg?
Zuckerberg?
Meta?
Yeah.
I think it's the best PR move that's ever happened to Mark Zuckerberg
because we used to hate him.
Like, this guy's a cuck.
Now you see him training.
He's doing jiu-jitsu. posts the the text message with his wife he's like babe I moved
to Okinawa in the backyard she's like honey I planned like this is what it is we're all damn
like in Zuckerberg still cucked yeah but their backyard is like fucking Nebraska yeah I know I
know it's not like my like you know that's what I was saying when he posts that text
everyone else is like Where would it fit
Did you see the octagon
Look did you see the octagon
I put in the backyard
Yes I saw it
It looks awesome
Mark we have plenty of yard space
I've been working on the grass
For two years
No you haven't
It pissed me off
Because like
He knew
They knew they were going to post this
I wish he would have texted first
Like what's this octagon
Doing in our backyard
Not hey did you see the octagon
I think it would have been
Funnier that way
It would have been better I don't know This is pretty funny It would have been better If he, did you see the octagon? I think it would have been funnier that way.
I don't know.
This is pretty funny. It would have been better if he put.
It was planned.
Yeah, this is all scripted.
It would have been better if he was like, yo, I put an octagon in the backyard.
Okay, well, I've been working on the yard.
No, you haven't.
We've been paying people.
That's what it is, bitch.
Wow.
Well, also, here's the deal.
There's no way you put in an octagon without her knowing.
It would be funny if we show fake messages from Brendan and his wife.
You know what I mean?
Chris is right. Your penis is small.
It's a picture of a video of her.
And also,
why is he ever in the phone?
Like Priscilla Chan.
I have boo, wifey.
I have everybody in my phone like that.
Guess who I have in my phone?
Bill D'Elia and Ellie D'Elia. Weird. That's how I have everybody In my phone like that Guess who I have in my phone Bill D'Elia
And Ellie D'Elia
Weird
Yep
So stupid
That's how I have it
That's weird
You know what
Actually I do that same thing too
It's only because you have
I don't know
I'm just a nerd about like
Oh you're a nerd really
Yeah
I used to just have
I have OCD about my
Contact list
Yeah
I have all nicknames
In my phone
I have to have
Sometimes
Who is this?
Oh, Rachel.
Rachel's like that.
Her names will be like a full sentence.
You know, it's like, that girl I met at the Pop Springs.
Oh, mine?
Because some people I don't know their names.
It'd be like, nice guy that I met at restaurant in Tampa.
I'm like, what's up, nice guy?
What's up, nice guy from Tampa? Hey, Tampa.
How's Tampa?
I have a lot of don't answers.
Oh, really?
I just block people when I don't.
You're just so racist.
I just, immediate, immediate.
Who is this number?
I don't know them.
You don't leave a message?
Block.
Yeah.
Straight up.
First of all, in this day and and age why are you calling anybody yeah
you know what i mean like you like to text it's a check-in i would i would hit you i'm gonna go
hey you free can you talk that's proper etiquette in this day and age you're just calling somebody
i don't know if i always think something's wrong if you call me i'm like yo what's up man
i answer phone go what happened that's why i'm saying you gotta be careful i'll be like yo what's
happening i'm like wait what'd you hear me jesus christ yeah that's what you know you're doing
that's what i'm saying you just go hey buddy i have a you know just a quick uh what's going on
but even that's hey what's up gotta call you oh no it's not like that that's not what i'm saying
hey you free dude i wanted to have a chat, you know?
About what?
Yeah.
Well, then you could say that. Want to go to Erewhon?
Right.
You know what I mean?
Call.
You text Chris Yeo's,
you got to open him with a joke.
What'd that dick do?
Like, what?
I'm like, no, dude,
seriously, I ain't going to talk to you.
Small pay, small calls.
Yeah, you got to call.
No, you have small dick.
So when someone calls you,
you have small dick.
I have a small cock in my butt.
Oh, shit.
Was I live when I said that?
No, you're so far away from the mic.
I didn't think we got more.
That's it.
Did we get a restricted call?
Oh.
We're done?
Okay.
Phoenix, this Friday, two shows.
It does matter, Chris, with your little dick.
Phoenix, this Friday.
It's August 11th.
The next week, Wednesday, I'm in Omaha.
Thursday, I'm in Kansas City.
Go get your tickets right now.
It's one night in each
city but kicking it off this weekend Friday Phoenix I'll be at JT Wings during the day
holla at your boy I'm gonna be one at the Ice House on August 17th or 18th I gotta look at
the thing one night so check that out it's Eric and Friends um oh yeah I haven't even booked
anybody you want to do that show?
Sure.
Okay.
Perfect.
I'll be in Charlotte and Nashville.
Charlotte and Nashville.
And Little Rock at the Ryman.
I'm playing the legendary Ryman.
I'm actually going to go do...
I'm doing some shows with Matt Rife because I'm going to help him with his new special.
Oh, cool.
You know?
So I'm going out with him.
Those shows are sold out.
So you can't even go.
You know what I mean?
So it's like, but check it out.
Just go to crystalia.com.
That's all we got.
Got a computer with him, huh?
Yeah.
He's a nerd now.
Pretty weird.
It's not weird.
That's what did it.
All right, kids.
Love you.
This is the iPhone 17. Thank you.