The Golden Hour - Episode 131: KATS Karaoke Night

Episode Date: July 23, 2021

The guys take part in the first ever KATS karaoke challenge, featuring Steebee Weebee and Brendan and Nick make a bet to win Nick's dog Chewy. Also, Brendan and Theo talk not being invited to Bobby Lee's 4th of July party, Steebee and Bobby's declining relationship, the Wi Spa controversy, an update with KATS Dating Game's Savannah and much more! Get your King and the Sting merch at katsmerch.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Or in Indiana, 1-800-9-WITH-IT. What about Zuckerberg with that advertisement for autism medicine? Did you see him sliding across that lake on that thing? Oh, my God. With the American flag? Gun him down. I don't know what I'm saying. Gang, gang.

Buzz, buzz. Back off my broccolini. Get your life together. It life together Don't touch me bro I'm not touching you dude Stevie huh Stevie Weeby Brought your lunch I see eh Brought a little snack for later huh

Nick I want to steal your dog How much Give me a price He's priceless Nah he's not though There me a price. He's priceless. Nah, he's not, though. There's a price on every hound. Suppose I were to offer you $1 million for one night with your wife. You want to bet on it?

Hey, dude. Let's bet for the dog. What? No, that's sex trafficking. Or not sex trafficking. Hound trafficking? No, just, I don't think you should bet on an animal's life, dude. Actually, fuck it. Nick just shot him. Yeah, an animal's life, dude. Actually, fuck it.

Nick just shot him. Yeah, let's fuck it, dog. Wager that bastard. He got Fury or Wilder. Neither. Fury all day. Well, there's COVID now, so it's not even going to happen, is it? Fury's camp got COVID, but I doubt they'll figure it out.

It's Irish. Foxen figures it out. It's Irish COVID. Yeah, it's Irish COVID. It's supposed to be a fun time. You just drink Guinness. You've got to put up something pretty heavy. What are you putting up, though?

I'm putting up the love of my life. You don't love him that much. 5K? He's cute. He's eight, though. I have another four solid years with him. You took that orange Gucci vest off him, so you don't care about him that much. Yep.

Probably returned it. And you have Connor? No, I have Wilder. You'll take Wilder. I'll take Fury wilder i'll take fury yeah let's do it five grand okay thanks for the rate and i get your dog uh uh yeah and clear it with my girl see if she'll let me take it because y'all were just talking about getting a dog remember oh he's cool i kind of want a puppy though because i think he's damaged goods he's a little skittish. He has PTSD. I believe his first family beat him.

Oh, God. Every dog. It's like, what are they doing? Is he a rescue? Yeah, but. That's what you get, bro. Where are all these dogs from? They're from where?

Memphis or something? Like, how is every dog? Like, he came over on the Mayflower. His grandfather had asthma. I found him on First 48. Yeah. He only has three legs. You look at it, he has four legs. You're like, no, he doesn't. He snuck over the border. I feel him on first 48. Yeah. He only has three legs. You look at it, he has four legs.

You're like, no, he doesn't. He snuck over the border. I feel like you're just doing this to hype up the price of this house. He's a sweet dog. No, no. Stevie, man, good to see you, man. Yeah, you too, man. It's been a while.

It has been. I'm sorry for the bait and switch. I heard what happened, and yeah, your mom got involved, and I'm sorry. Stevie was mad. He thought I set him up. No, no, there was no setup. I just, got involved and I'm sorry Stevie was mad he thought I set him up no no there was no set up I just you know I took a

I'm taking a break I'm just just chilling right now and yeah just you got that fresh face I just kind of simmered down on that

I you know with the initial breakup I'm like yeah I want a date but now I think I'm like I'm gonna take it slow

you know I am talking to you were a little pussy hound when you got hey brother don't use that kind of language if you don't mind man um i'm just yeah i'm sorry texting are you ron white for halloween why are you dressed like this huh are you ron are you turning to ron white dude ron white can't even remember his name he's like what does r-o-n mean we're like that's you ron dude i interviewed ron white one time and he's a beautiful man he's 60 he's 60 or 70 hundred years old and i interviewed him one time beautiful hair

you know if he he's the kind of guy if he died i'd go up to the coffin and cut a little bit of his hair and take it yeah interviewed him for two and a half hours okay saw him the next day at the comedy store oh that guy's an old-time comic isn't he yeah he's all-time great dog he's on the blue comedy tour yeah that guy's original like hitler texas or something yeah uh apparently you did this interview at restoration hardware why do you guys sit on the couch like that we did it his house man that's right that's? Yeah. Is he a nice guy? He's a really nice guy. Really nice guy.

Yeah, he's a super nice guy. He's a businessman, though. What people don't realize is that VIP stuff, that comics, I used to it, but when you do the meet and greet, he owns that whole business. That's all him. He looks like he drinks, too. Does he drink alcohol? Whiskey.

Oh, I knew it. He'll be on stage with whiskey and a cigar. Oh, yeah. No no he's a legend but he also did um ayahuasca this is what i've heard he did ayahuasca six months ago and he hasn't had a drink since then oh wow oh it cures you he did it at a marriott hey am i allowed to do that even though i'm in a program can i do that once huh ayahuasca i'm not your sponsor hey nice try to get that out of me. Yeah. Nice try. I've tried that before.

I'm trying to co-sign that. Yeah. I know. I'm just asking for... Hey, it's cool to use cocaine if it's a Friday, right? Just ask it. Hey, guy that's smoking crack over here. Do you think it would be okay?

Well, that's a yes. Just once. Look. I could do it once. It's not addictive. I don't know that program either. There's a lot of wellness things happening right now. Brennan, you need to know more about this kind of stuff.

Right. Especially with your brain damage or whatever. I heard that microdosing is the new hotness on the street. That's old. That's four months ago. The new thing that people are doing now, MDMA stuff, NAD. The NAD drip? What is that?

That NAD drip. Have you ever done it, too? I haven't done it. It's basically medieval torture. Is it really? It's a nightmare. Don't let Rogan talk you into NAD drip. He did to me.

I was doing it for four weeks. It's medieval torture. But what happens? It hurts bad. What do they do? They just put it in your system, right? Yeah, they put an IV in that drips in. It takes about an hour.

It takes a long time. Dude, if you're moving fast, you can do it in about an hour. It usually takes about two hours. I can get it in in a few minutes, bet pure shit well what is it i think rogan get the fastest we just open up the floodgates he didn't like i don't know 18 minutes or something but you feel like awful i'll do the suppositories it's pure silver what is it it's pure silver stevie what is that though what does it do to your body listen i didn't feel anything off of it i think you probably did it sounds like you got involved in something different you know how What is that, though? What does it do to your body? Listen, I didn't feel anything off of it. I think it takes some time.

You probably did. It sounds like you got involved in something different, you know? I was using Rogan's NAD guy, man. Yeah. I can't believe you guys know him. I'm a big fan of that guy, you know? Are you, though? Yeah.

Really? Joe? Really? What are you a fan of? Because you're not that into... No, because I've seen you on so many. Joey Diaz, you, you. I watch all of it.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, I look up to him. Yeah, look, I think a lot of people look up to him. Is he a nice guy in real life, though? Yes. He's real, like, down to earth? Great guy. Okay.

Yeah, he is. He's just real, like, curious. He's, like, the most curious guy I ever met, probably. He's, like, curious about everything, you know? He, like, wants to know things Yeah, well, I'm like in you. Yeah, we don't give a shit. Well, I care but you you do you can't know stuff I feel like and I choose not to okay Deprivation tanks that does he really have that dude? I live here in interstate. Okay, I've done fucking sleep deprivation

I've done those tanks, but you get naked. Yeah, I live here in interstate, okay? I've done fucking sleep deprivation. Yeah, I've also done those tanks. But you get naked? Yeah, I don't suggest that either. I don't suggest that either. Yeah, I actually peed in my ice bath the other day. Yeah, I jacked off on those tanks. Oh, did you? Oh, yeah, you said that, huh? Not for me.

The old freaking yolk in the egg, bro. This one's got double yolks in it. So what's been going on with you, man? No, I've just been taking it mellow. You seem really seem really calm today i am i feel like you're in a good place yeah i just i i just i've been you know kind of thinking about things i'm like i should just because i'm going to be a lot busier with uh scissor bros and we're thinking about doing well we're going to release do a patreon now so i got to get ready should do twice a week yeah and then with my own podcast so three times a week yeah so that and

just a lot of things i need to be more responsible you're gonna kill yourself son you're trying to get you know get to the big boy i feel you i'm mad at your brother right now i text him i text i group text him and santino santino takes me right back your brother still hasn't respond you weren't there at his fourth of july party you guys didn't show up I didn't get invited Oh you think it's funny I thought for sure First of all it's America's party Yeah for sure So let's be honest

Andrew was there I met his wife I didn't know he was married Yeah great she's nice Who knows if he's married or not You can't tell So I would have loved to have seen you guys there how was the party really fun it was really kind of you know just okay i never got invited either by what's his name delia's party i did me too i did i never got invited by uh santino i invite you to my party yeah you're the only friend i

invited you know what i would like is is he goes to a Korean spa. And you know, Pauly's been there. It's just a spa for you. Is it Wii Spa? No, no, no, no. Because you know, Wii Spa got in trouble. Have you heard about Wii Spa? Tell them the story.

Tell them what happened. I used to go to Wii Spa all the time when I was fighting. Because it's like a Korean bath. They have like real cold ice bathing and switch between them. Well, apparently they let this transgender identify as a woman, but it's a man with a big dick. So this woman's in there with her kid, her daughter. Slanging his rod. And she's like, she comes out.

She's like, dude, this guy has a dick. Yeah. But he considers herself a woman. She's like, I don't care. Yeah. Like my kid shouldn't be eye to eye with this guy's big ass dick. That's a man with a dick. Yeah.

And the wee spot was like, well he she identifies as a as a woman she's like bro i don't care there's a dick in the women's bathroom oh yeah we're in a different time now like most places we're not dude no when you're screwing around with other things right and most places would be like well you need to go identify somewhere else okay because 99.9% of people are one or the other. So we can't adjust the whole rules. What they should have is a separate section for people that are trans. That's a good idea. They need to have a trans Olympic section.

Trans tub? Have a trans world championships. If you have boobs and a penis? In four years, yeah. You know how hard it would be to run with boobs and a penis? I feel like I'd love to watch them do it. I mean, I'd watch it. You know?

Yeah. It's one of the most Olympic shit. Yeah, it'd be better. Especially when they hit those hurdles, dude. Tim, them nuts hitting the hurdles? Oh, trying to keep that fucking cock up off that hurdle? Dude, please. I'm into it.

Or the long jump. You want to see that? The big ass dick flapping. Hell yeah, I'm into it. We got to mix things up man so anyway would you guys be open to going to the Korean spa with me and Bob

dude we can't even get invited to do Bobby's Japanese party or whatever it was okay well first of all it's our party that we started

he came over here and then fucking didn't invite us to it yeah it kind of hurts our feelings tell him we're hurt should I yeah

we're not gonna text you back he won't even give you work we're hurt. Should I? Yeah. He's not going to text you back. He won't even give you work. We're the only one giving you any work. I mean, what are we even talking about here? Your brother's straight up Hollywood now, bro. Oh, yeah. Oh, Lord, you're right. Dude, you could have a baby by now.

Yeah, I know. I'd be living in a shack, huh? Yeah, I mean. Steve, cook me some rice, dude. Yeah. For the look at us, man. I gave you $5. Hey, Bob. Yeah. Look at us, man. I gave you $5. Hey, Bob.

Hey. All right. You know, I just got a pair of these, man, and I'm enjoying them. You know, they used to call me Flamingo Feet when I was growing up because you could see my tarsals through my skin real easily. I kind of had the foot of like a like a you know archaeologists man when they go into rocks and then they find that bird phalange and you'll see it's a boneage in there that's what i got they used to call me flamingo feet well all birds tree runners cover any type of feet

start to take some steps towards normalcy in this wild new world. That's right. All birds, tree runners. I got a pair in there. You know what's great about them? They're comfortable, but they look nice. That's a hard thing to find. It also seemed like, heck, you could almost stop and play a game in them.

A game of hoops if you wanted to. Yeah. They're made from sustainable natural materials that feel light on your feet and are better for the planet. You know, you don't want to, you know, 200 years from now, a child digs up a damn dirty Reebok or something in his yard. That won't happen. All birds, tree runners are breathable, machine washable. That's good and made with responsibly sourced eucalyptus tree fiber damn you'll have a damn koala at you nipping at your damn uh

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What do you got, Nick? Yeah, what do you got, Nick? We do have updates from our dating game winner and Savannah. Who's still dating? I love how there's a dating game, but nobody got a date. You were gone that time. Look, I will say this. I watched the episode that you did.

She was a looker, man. She was a hooker. A looker. She was a looker. Yeah, sorry. I get my L's and H's mixed up. You know what I'm saying? Okay.

Fair enough. Okay. Lurby Landcock, dude. One of my favorite signers of the independence document. No alteration. I remember this guy's struggles. I remember this guy. What were you going to say?

I remember this guy. This guy's a handsome guy. This is a male nurse, first of all. He's a handsome guy. He's very handsome. He's a massage therapist or a physical therapist? A physician's assistant, I think. Male nurse, I think, is pretty much all encompassing.

So they traded numbers, right? They got each other's digits. Beautiful young fellow. Take it easy, man. He's a handsome guy. I am taking it easy. Look at his face. Can't be wearing that shirt, throwing that out there.

What do you got? Yeah, and they've been talking, they've been chatting, and they gave us an update on how it's going. Oh, so a date happened. One's in Minnesota, one's in Idaho. Oh, that's right. Savannah gave us permission to give Andrew her number and they've been

talking, so let's see. I'm surprised Stevie didn't try to fly over there and slip where that wink or bang, huh? I'm being a good boy, man. I'm trying to do the right thing. Trying to relax on the hose? I'm just chilling, yeah. I can feel it. You seem in a better headspace. Yeah, that's true.

Just relaxed, yeah. Probably going back to that fake butt. Maybe. You don't have to bring that up. Old faithful. You don't have to bring up the black butt, man. Look how good he's doing. It's reparations.

Get in there, dude. It's in the closet. Get in there and deposit. Oh, no, I'm using a tanga egg now. You what? Have you heard of a tanga egg? Tanga egg? Yeah, look it up real quick.

So we put the egg that you put um this liquid this sticky vaseline gooey liquid and you place it on the head of your dick and you you cut you uh stroke it you stroke it and it's like have you seen alien like alien one when the alien yeah pops out yeah out of the chest yeah yeah you you see the head of your penis doing that. Check it out, man. Now, it sounds like she just used Cadbury eggs. It's basically, yeah, that's what it is. Yeah, tanga egg.

I think it's Japanese. Yeah, there you go. It's like you're jacking off with a ghost. It feels fantastic. Wow. How'd you find out about this? Someone sent me and Jeremiah one in the post office. Oh, that sounds like a great one.

So he used it one night. He did it standing up. He's married with kids. Don't do the hand motion, please. We don't need all that in here. It's in that kind of show. It's a family show, bro. It's a family show, isn't it?

Look, and we're all, how quick to the lawsuit where Scissor Bros has penises out around scissors? Okay, that's a dead-end job right there. What do you mean? Talk to HR, Stevie. Soon as some guy sees one of your videos, gets his urinator out, and he also has scissor bros, he has a couple pieces of scissors on the counter

because he's a huge fan, he's snipping around, nips his freaking goose stick. It's a rap player. Don't put that out in the universe, please. It's me, you. You're the one out in the universe, please. It's me. You. You're the one out there monkeying around. I know. I know. But please

don't do that if you're listening. Don't cut your penis. Dude, Scissor Bros. Very dangerous title because of the you know what I'm saying? What if we're the knife boys? You know how soon we're going to get sued? No, we're positive. Machete boys? You think that's smart? No, we're doing something positive. What about Grenade Cousins? What we're doing something positive what about uh grenade

cousins you think that's what we're doing is positive man yeah real positive until somebody yeah positive till it's not stevie yeah no one's gonna cut their penises off you'd be surprised man people are wild out there be surprised dude really yeah this is your this is your you'd be surprised can i announce something though because people you have a big fan base and we're gonna hurt your feelings at home ladies and gentlemen don't cut anything down there please it's so but This is your you'd be surprised Don't cut anything down there, please it's so but it do you Know you don't I cut my pew you guys don't have any coverage. There's no way you have any liability insurance. It's a rap. Do we need that? Huh? Oh, you're putting fear installing fear in my heart. It's not fear That's finances baby We've been doing this too long We've been doing this too long

That's finances dog So you know the game Like So how do we Do we have to do a name change We'll talk off air man Okay no problem We'll talk off air

I like bad friends But whatever Yeah but you know Well what about Kindergarten Scissor Bros The rounded scissors What's What difference does that make

Fifth grade bros A whole Fifth grade bros Oh cause those scissors Fifth grade br are rounded. They're not as sharp Yeah, they're those little round ones. Yeah, all it takes is some little frickin You know some little fucking snot Muppet out there to clip his own fucking gander wand open and they'll Put himself yeah Out and over he trying to DIY frickin. Uh, it some lady nips out an ovary trying to DIY freaking...

That's a lawsuit, isn't it? Could be. Where'd you learn this, scissor bros? Two guys? Two freaking closeted gay men? I like good friends, too. Huh? I like good friends.

Yeah, your brother took that from you before we gave you a job. I think Santino took that from him. Oh, that's true. Santino tried to see you. All right, we don't have to cross that road. Dude, Santino is really Bobby's brother. Yeah, okay, dude. Now you're really getting to the core.

It's like a therapy session. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that, man. I love you. No, no, that's fine. It just makes me sad. They're making good money. They are.

They're making good money. They're Steve Jobs. You're working the freaking factory. Oh, I'm in the kitchen washing dishes, man. Yeah. Good for them. I love them. What do you got?

Do you? I do and I don't. Let's listen to this. I do and I don't. What's up, guys? This is Andrew. Just giving an update on me and Savannah. So we've been talking a little bit.

And initially, we really hit it off. And we seem to have a lot in common. And she's a really cool girl. But the Minnesota thing is making it tough, you know, being 19 hours away from each other. It's hard to meet up. But if you guys are willing to set something up for us, I would still love to meet her, you know, have her here for a weekend and throw her a good time. And, you know, we could film it.

It could be like chin in hot Carl, except, you know, we might get wasted, but we will actually do some stuff after and you know i won't be staring at her tits the whole time just kidding chin i love you guys i love you brendan i love you theo and i just love the show gang gang buzz buzz gang baby thank you man well 19 hours you have you're driving bubba that's a short flight yeah that's a great point if you're in a airline will get you there pretty fast yeah if you are in a conestoga wagon yeah you're probably looking at about 30 hours he's like that's a seven week track man yeah if you're walking baba we're gonna send you on

southwest he's like hopefully next spring what do you tell a guy like this steven when he's got a great haircut um he's got a nice, he's handsome. You can tell he has good hygiene. He's responsible. Ooh, here we go. Yep, here we go. Look at those frickin' front Muppets, huh? Those gonzos, dog.

Hanging the sting. It's Savannah here with a little dating game update. Thank you guys again for having me on. It was so much fun. Me and Andrew decided to call it quits because I realized how far away Minnesota really is from Idaho. Theo, it's not too late for you to shoot your shot. Go ahead and slide in my DMs. I'll come to Nashville. That's not too far away. But I do have a lot of weird DMs in my Instagram inbox. A few blue check marks that I'm not mad about.

A lot of men offering to fly me to Toronto, Texas, so I can be their southern girl. One guy saying that he's not from Idaho, but he'd love to be my potato. And a lot of guys who found my LinkedIn. But thanks again. It's been a weird experience. It's been fun. Gang, gang, buzz, buzz.

Oh, I know what's going on. This guy says either I'm coming to Idaho or you're coming to Toronto. She likes you. You don't belong with any of these guys in videos, not January. She's trying to get Daddy's sugar beet. She likes you. I just figured it out. This whole thing was a plot.

She likes you. Well, we knew that from the jump. She made it pretty clear. She wants that dark art chaff. She likes, she wants some of that. God damn, that's her clear she wants that dark art shaft she likes she wants some of that uh god damn that's her no that's pretty fierce theo's comments on savannah just made me recall this uh me hands looking fine yeah i forgot i did that dude i'm a fan dude i'm with you on this man it was right before bed

Yeah, I bet he got pretty sticky after that She's a beautiful lady hashtag the one that's a beautiful lady with one underground and railroad some dark, but dude Yeah, we steal shooting shots at Britney fucking Spears. A nice way to say that. And here's what's interesting. I could see it happening, bro. Thanks, player. Damn, look at that hard bod, man. Somebody tried to set us up one time years ago.

I used to know her cousin when I was in college. Come on, man. Wait, is she from New Orleans? Come on, man, dude. That's like double Ds, man. Those are double Ds. Come on, woman. She's from Louisiana, right, dude?

You're a strange guy man i love you we're just saying come on man is she from louisiana yeah she's from kentwood louisiana bro this is a match made in heaven she has a husband bro no she doesn't she's married she's married she's not married anymore dude and if she is i'll do a fucking saving silverman and break him up for you i I will do that for you. No, you can't. That guy's jacked her husband. What about that one? No. Is she married, Nick? I don't think so,

but... I'll take that other... This is, yeah, this is the other girl. Idaho Britney Spears. Well, here's the wild thing. Did the one man know that they weren't going to have a... Because he seemed kind of hopeful. He's into it, and she was like, not a chance. She's like like we're donezos but where's that firefighter dude stevie yeah that guy was that was a dude i mean you're

welcome the marlboro man guy he's fighting fires as we speak to him i think he had probably asthma or something yeah i think which i don't even believe in savannah john, we'll see. Maybe if I get to boys, I'll take you out for a soda or something. Soda bar? Cream soda, man. Cream soda. But she really likes you. You have no idea. This is a video tape. I know, but I know.

This could be edited. She really likes you. No, she does. And you've been dressing better. No, they don't. No, she does. She does. And you've been dressing better. You can tell, man. I know what you have. I only have about seven shirts.

She wants your babies, dude. I'm not doing any babies out there in the mountains. I know, but I'm just saying. She really likes it. Can you imagine a baby trying to crawl down a mountain? A mountain? They live in Idaho. They live in the mountains.

Oh, that's right. Yeah. Have you performed in Boise i would do salt flat baby have you have you done boise yet uh yeah i've done boys how long ago though it's been it was the dark arts tour it's also pretty recent yeah not too yeah about two years ago okay you know what's up she's gonna be at your show man boise's fantastic yeah man boise's great dude i think it would be great to meet her sometime and see if we love each other.

I hope it happens. It could happen, dude. Dude, I want you and Britney Spears to be together. Dude, I shot my shot. We'll put her in the culture corner. You shot your shot with her?

Britney Spears? Yeah. She had nice yams. He said them yams. She's going to see that. He's the top comment, dude. Hashtag free Britney. That's amazing.

Who wants them front yams, dude? That's amazing, man. You know what I'm saying? Them fricking rib nuggets, baby. Them sternum hams, though. Baby, hit me one more time, man. I'm in, dude. I'm in.

Who's this? Is this George, the guy you used to fight? No. Could be his brother. You've been ducking, dude? I'm not ducking. I like the kid. I'm not duck the guy you've been ducking, dude? I'm not ducking. I like the kid. I'm not ducking.

You're ducking everybody, dude. I'm not ducking anybody. You sure you are. I like him. I'm not ducking him. You're paking, ducking everybody. I'm up 135. I'm 130 pounds.

But you have speed. I'm 135 pounds. I weighed myself at the Korean spa. Dude. 135. It's called the spa to you, first of all. And, okay, I don't say i'm going to the american louisiana this weekend i'm sorry i don't know what else to call it theo just look at your history

i know man what that's the right way korean spa dude no it's just in k-town it was right bro no but korean spa it's a different thing. It's not, though. It is. Let's go to our resident Korean. Chin, back me up. I say when we talk to each other, it's a spa. But when we're talking to you guys, it's a Korean spa. I rest my case. When you're Korean, we know it's Korean when you tell us.

There you go. Hey, Chin, when you go to Korean barbecue, let's say you invite Stevie, you go, hey, we're going to Korean barbecue. Or just say, we're going to barbecue. You know what? I do both. Well, that's just wrong. I do both. Because I don't go, hey, we're going to Korean barbecue? Or do you just say, we're going to barbecue? You know what? I do both. Well, that's just wrong. I do both.

Because I don't go, hey, anyone want American barbecue? Damn, remember when Bobby cared about Stevie when they were kids? Yeah, a long time ago. Sorry. Years ago. It just breaks my heart. I was writing about it in my diary the other day. What did you say?

I drew a picture of you, drew a picture of Bobby. And then, no. And then I just, I just. You tore it in half, set it on fire no and then I just I just you tore it in half set it on fire no I just thought about it and I just said

man you guys were close then yeah you guys too close now or no I just spent movies and stuff yeah he just went to Hungary

yeah big movie yeah yeah but look at Luke Wilson gets his brother in the movie you know even with that nose

still in the movies right dude who else gets their brother Eddie Murphy got his brother in the movie. You know? Even with that nose. Still in the movies. Right. Dude, who else gets their brother? Eddie Murphy got his brother in the movies. Yeah, Charlie Murphy. It killed him. Oh, yeah. Chris Rock, too, has a brother.

Eddie Rock. Yeah. Oh, the Wayans. Oh, they get their brother. You have Damon. You have Marlon. You know what I mean? Oh.

Brothers. Dude, the Wayans will jerk off in a napkin and then get the napkin in the movie. Everybody in the movie. Anybody with Wayans DNA is getting in the movie. You got to get in there. I know. So what do I say? Hey, Bob.

And you're out here fucking around with this. Hook me up with your agent, Bob. Yeah. Is that what I do? You text him, hey, dude. Hook me up with CAA, dude. I got my head shots ready, man. He's your CAA agent.

Yeah, he's the agent. I'm like, hey, I'll do the movie. My brother needs a small part. He's got that much power like i think he does i think he's getting there what i don't know about that but we're talking about like i think us saying he does yeah yeah you guys are on the same level what are you talking about well i wouldn't say bobby and i are on the same level you're on look at this studio oh yeah it's great he doesn't have this stuff i know he't. That's why I'm saying I wouldn't say Bobby and I are on the same level.

Bobby's Hollywood, though. Theo's getting pretty Hollywood, too. Yeah, you're getting up there, dude. You're getting up there. I stay out of it, man. I'm Hollywood. You're getting up there, too. The closest thing I even know to Hollywood is you.

No, you know a lot of people, man. They know who you are. You hang around with more famous people than I do. I don't know about that i don't know about you probably know uh yeah dinner last night with david spade yeah that's true you fucking jerk off uh the fucking uh no uh i bailed out of chris pratt's movie you're right you're right you're you're with uh kid rock every other weekend on the boat? That's right. With your tits out? You're connected, man. Yep. Keep going. Keep going where?

Just by your connections and your status. I can keep going, but I'm not going to. Right. There's no more Hollywood. But he's up there, right? Thank you. He's up there. There's nowhere else to move, though.

You moved to Nashville. This is our Hollywood. No, but you have the freedom if you want it. You could probably get a house out here, too, if you wanted. He could. I know what she makes. I don't want no house out here all right fair enough but that's your decision but if i did have it you could come and stay with me i wouldn't make you stay in hud housing rental apartment somewhere i like my apartment it's a beautiful apartment i'm just saying my brother would be staying with me if he wanted. My brother stays with me when he comes to me. Guest house? Guest house at least? Easily. Guest chalet.

Yeah. At least, right? Take the water sign down in the morning. Or like in the garage at least? They call it a casita if you're Mexican. In the casita? Yeah. Dude, you should be in the casita, dude.

How do I get through to Bob, though? Because he's catering to, you know, he's got people he's taking care of there. It's great. George and everyone's around. to collide you know he's got people he's taking care of there it's great george i know a lot of people that have you know i don't want to say yeah typ taking you a place but you know i hate to use acronyms that hurt people's feelings that's why but i look man you're welcome here and i'll say this i love the episode when you guys did with eric griffin man you did i i just tuned in to make sure that you guys even got the thing up. And you usually hate the episodes, right?

When you're not here? It was the dating game. It's not my favorite when I'm not here because I wish that I was here, but I loved it. You did? I loved it. What'd you like about it? I felt like there was some kind of beef between... I felt a little beef between you and Eric, but I felt like...

Did you feel any animosity towards Stevie, towards me? No, I only... That was a fake beef because i i was that was my entry point to the fart spray challenge yeah because y'all were so organized with your chronological yeah so i had no time to get a word in because you know what about eric's so fast on his toes boom boom it's a talker yeah he could just every second that's not the no he's got punches boom boom he talks though boom. He talks, though. He's mentally quick. Yeah, mentally quick.

I'm not that quick. I'm like slow. I'm like, oh. You're a different speed, Coach. Yeah, I'm just very slow. Yeah. Yeah. You're like, Bobby Lee.

Yeah, just slowly getting into it. Brother. Yeah. Yeah, that needs to change, too. They need to start saying, hey, aren't you Steve? Steve? Steve's brother? Mm-hmm. Yeah. That needs to change. And that's changing start saying, hey, aren't you Steve's brother? That needs to change.

And that's changing. Oh, yeah. Bobby's not on here. You are. Give me six months. You're the one who's actually still getting some leg out there in the world.

You're flying out to Washington. Washington getting hickeys and shit. Mugging down some Target worker, dude. Okay, that's way better. Bobby's over here. Bobby's over here still making love to the same woman. Watch your words, Theo.

I love her. Okay, okay, okay. Everyone in here loves her. Okay, okay, okay. Okay? And I've already written down certain walls and stuff around town that I love her. Fair enough. Bathroom walls.

I'm just saying, wherever. Wherever will accept it. They're a good match, man. They're a great match. Yeah. Power couple. They're a great match. Power couple. Beautiful. Both of them them beautiful and they need to have kids i don't know if bobby can have them

no i think himself shoot i i weighed him at the spa how much guess 200 180 yeah 180 and most of it was gristle. 180, dude. 5'4", 180. His body fat was 69%. He was 88% body fat? Dude, his... Is that like an elephant seal? His body fat, it said Cool Whip came up on the thing. Is he like a baby elephant seal? Yeah. Oh, if he doesn't die by clubbing, I won't even know how it all works.

I will not even know how the world even works. What about you back there, fucking semen nipple? What are you doing? You alive? You forgot your vape pen today, so nobody even wants to talk to you. Little Fazoli forgot his fucking vapor. Know your role, dude. That's a great Mr. D shirt, though, so you fully redeemed yourself.

Know your role. Does Paul Revere show up with a hoarse voice? No, he doesn't, dude. Bring your fucking vape stick, daddy. All right? And we want the coconut one not that other one you had one time you know that bullshit grape or whatever laser lime no no it was uh red energy yeah red energy okay what are you trying to do yeah who are you putin get the fuck

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What? No, I'm taking the dog. Yeah, take it easy. I like the dog. That's going to be my dog soon, man. So take it easy. I like the dog. That's going to be my dog soon, man. So take it easy. I like the dog. I do, I like the dog.

We've seen the drawings, all right? We've seen. I'm just saying, whatever spell you put on this thing. There's no spell. Okay. This is just pure love. All right. I love the dog.

Why don't you just order a Bunsen burner on Amazon? Hey, easy, dude. I'm not, what are you implying? I'm going to eat the terrier? How dare you? I would never say that. I would never eat a Yorkshire terrier, you son of a gun. Even though, let's say this.

You son of a gun. How dare you? I was not insinuating. Dude, yes, you are. You said Bunsen burner, my man. You're implying that I was going to cook this little Yorkshire terrier. I love this dog. How dare you, Theo?

The dog was awake. I'm not smelling it. The dog was awake when you got here. The dog was on my lap. The dog liked me. Okay, the dog did like you. Yeah. Okay, I'm just saying now the dog appears to not be doing very well. No, the dog loves me, dude.

He trusts me. Does he trust anything right now? He went right into my lap. Right here. You saw it, Brendan. This dog loves me. Whose he trust anything right now? Yeah, dude. Okay. He went right into my lap. Right here. You saw it, Brendan. This dog loves me. Whose DMs are these? We talked about that one.

Yeah, let's get going. Let's get into the episode. Stevie had a bunch of suitors. And I'm sorry, Stevie. I love you, dude. I love you too, man. I got upset. I got upset.

I'm not either. Oh, you got upset? I think there's a thing with Bobby. It's like, why? You know, when i was growing up my dad he had some older kids yeah and they were really wealthy yeah and they didn't treat him well i was a kid we didn't have any money or anything and they made him live in like uh and i know you live in a nice place i'm not saying that but they just didn't like yeah they

made him live in a shack there were people stabbings and shootings all the time outside brothers out there. Right, right. Somebody stabbed him. Some black guy stabbed him with a screwdriver. But, yeah, I just don't want to see it end like that for you. Because me and Theo take care of ours. Yeah.

That's right. How about my brother's car? Oh, wow. We pay you every time you come in here, don't we? Yeah, you're starting to now, yeah. Good. You're starting to now. I appreciate that, guys.

Yeah. And I'm not judging Bobby. I know he's busy. Mm-hmm. You know? I know he's got a lot of mouths to know. I appreciate that, guys. Yeah. And I'm not judging Bobby. I know he's busy. Mm-hmm. You know, I know he's got a lot of mouths to feed. Sometimes you got to stop and smell your brother. Yeah. But the first steak I get goes to my brother's lips.

You take care of a... And that's from Game of Thrones, actually. Yeah, older brother. He'll be here next week. You got him a car? Mm-hmm. GT3. It's a Toyota Celica.

It's a GT3 Porsche. It's nice. It's nice, man. So we a GT3 Porsche But still dude It's nice It's 91 So we had a bunch of Suitors for Stevie One girl I was like Is really into him

And someone was like Is she really though If she was so Retired Is she really Bro Don't be so negative You gotta help him out

With his Confidence Confidence This was his reaction And someone was like Well if she liked him so much Why didn't she slide in his DMs Well she sent proof that she actually

did slide in. No what did she send? No that's not my Instagram man Oh it is? It is. Hold up man. Call me it says too. Is that the girl from Montana or whatever? Yep. Dude this girl is so thirsty for you

bro. I don't know I never received that one one no that's him sending a message what was that no yeah that's her no that's her sending to him never never got it i think that's what is your handle is that her handle that's me is my korean name that's my handle thank you nice to meet you sir you're sir it's nice to finally meet you who you really are i'm being honest i that's the first time i've seen that yeah yeah i'm sure you'll idea i would respond back to that one stevie she's a beautiful woman yeah but you know i'm trying to you know and maybe enter a different another program where it works on that are you a sex addict yeah i think

i think yeah i mean dude i have a black butt, I got fleshlights, you know, I'm doing, yeah, I've got the tanga egg, there's things going on. Yeah, I'm trying to simmer it down,

you know what I mean? But dude, how are you? Buy Terry Crews' book, you got over it. Maybe an animated person would. Yeah, I'll wait for a robot.

Or to get your frustration in other ways, why don't you fight the kid? I thought you guys were setting up the mat over at Thick Boy Studios. I'm trying to set, we are,

we have full mats ready for you to go with the big boy. I want to do it two weeks Tuesday. Or no, next week. Next Tuesday. Are you down to wrestle this guy? Nick, have you seen the space? Yes. It's huge. We have wrestling mats. Oh, man. I'm a buck 35.

I'm out of shape, man. You arm wrestled Brendan. You're not out of shape. I saw your back earlier when you changed shirts. Good shape. You look good. Your legs popping. Oh, good shape, dude. You can stick and move on this big boy. No, I need a little bit of time. I saw your back earlier when you changed shirts. Good shape. You look good. And your legs? Your legs? Oh, good shape, dude. You can stick and move on this big boy. No, I need a little bit of time to at least hike up a run in and get my heart rate going. That's not going to help. No, it is.

What if you and I worked on some moves that are guaranteed to work out? You can train me, man. Why don't you just cry by the mail slot for 10 minutes? That'll get your heart going. I got a black belt. You can teach me jujitsu. I got a black belt. Let Brendan train me. And we a nail slot for 10 minutes. Oh, you know jujitsu. That'll get your heart going. Yeah, I got a black belt. You could teach me jujitsu. Sorry, I don't think I'm being today. Yeah, let me, let Brendan train me.

And we'll get some of that footage. I want to do this up. We'll have Anik do some voiceover on the lead up. I'll have Bruce Buffer announce you guys. Ooh. Well, what is it? A wrestling match? Or what's the program?

Just wrestling. Just wrestling. Just wrestling. Straight wrestling. Just like you in high school. Well, you're punching a bag. Remember that one time? Yeah, that's just him trying to lose weight.

But you guys are going to wrestle. There's no punching. You guys really want to see this, huh? Well, I think here's what you're going to do. Because I think you're going to beat him. Dude, I'm 135 pounds. He's less than 300. Dude, you're Vince Papalia fighting.

Just fucking sign up for it. And here's the thing. We need singlets. We need cat singlets. Okay? I like Ray has that. Already looking into it. Thank you.

And so we're gonna need a Few more weeks If we do it next week People are not gonna be ready I want Theo here Yeah Yeah I thought we're doing a tag team thing

With me and Jeremiah We could wear WWF Remember You said I could tag him in You said I could tag Jeremiah What about him and Jeremiah Because the cardio Against the big boy

That's fair Tag team We tie one of Jeremiah's arms behind his back. That's fair enough. No way. If Stevie's just gassing out, he can tag in Jeremiah. He could just use one arm. No, you can use all your appendages.

But the big boy, then it's even because they both weigh in. The big boy has a name. What's his name? George. His name's George. He's Jackson was at my comedy show the other night. I like him. I would like to say that. In honor of whites and Asians in here, the master mix.

Michael Jackson's kid? It was Michael Jackson, yeah. Michael Jackson's kid. I used to do jiu-jitsu with him. It's a girl. She has a brother, though. Dimey, too. Who's this?

Bro, start dating Michael Jackson's daughter Then sky's the limit dog Get her pregnant You set I just went to a month retreat For a week retreat for sexual wellness dude See that's what I'm talking about You really did?

Yeah See I need to do I need to get on that You would really dig it man Bobby went there It's the same one he went to Oh so you went to Arizona Yeah

You went to that Scottsdale? Yeah How did it work? That Bobby went there. It's the same one he went to. Oh, so you went to Arizona? Yeah. You went to Scottsdale? Yeah. How did it work? That's a good one. It's good. How did it work? That's a good one. You came here talking about you have nine dates.

Dates, but I'm not masturbating in a dark anus. I'm not doing a... There's levels to this game. Yeah, there's levels. And I was on... He really needs help. All right, Brendan. At least I admitted it.

Yeah, I do. First step. Yeah. Yeah. level and i was really need help yeah all right brendan at least i admitted it yeah i do first step yeah yeah what about zuckerberg with that advertisement for autism medicine did you see him sliding across that lake on that thing oh my god with the american flag gun him down could there be a bigger dork oh my my God. What is going on there? If this isn't an ad for autism medication, I don't know what is, dude. What is his problem? Paul reversed, dude. Turn around.

This is the next promo for love on the spectrum? Turn around, dude. It looks like he won season seven of Alone. It looks like he won season seven of Alone. Dude, I'd fist fight this little bitch, bro. I'd hard scarf this fucking... God, I'd love to set up that Zuckerberg versus Theo. Oh, that'd be amazing. People said immediately after this video,

he sold all our data to Russia. For sure. This is the end of it right there. That's him heading over to Russia. That's a great commercial. Alright, what's this big boy want? This gentleman wants some help. He's 19, doesn't have his license. Okay. Driving license?

Yo, Brennan Theo, what up, man? It's Dale Yankovich from Pontchartour, Louisiana, man. Shout out Cubs. I ain't never been to that shithole, but if Theo says it's nice, it's nice. I was wondering if y'all could give me some advice, man. I just started driving recently. I'm 19.

My mom's been on my ass for a while about driving and shit. I still have my driver's license, though, and my driver's test is coming up. And I get fucking – I'm not going to lie. I get nervous when I got to take the test. But I found out that little – you hit a little bit of that Takavaka. You feel a little better on my driver's test. But I know I couldn't take it on my driver's test, so I probably out that little you hit a little bit of that talk of vodka you feel a little better on my driving test but I know I couldn't take it on my driving test I probably feel that shit I was wondering if y'all had any good remedies for me like what could help me pass you know maybe maybe something legal a little less illegal than that little talk of vodka but whatever y'all need

whatever y'all say I'll take it brother thank you yeah I think if you had about eight ounces of preparation dude you'll do fine on a driving test man it's uh pretty fucking easy it pretty easy there's a there's over there's over i think 80 million drivers in in america yeah i think uh a little kratom might help him right chin i was gonna say kratom too really a little kratom maybe a little meth it takes a little bit of anxiety off what's kratom explain it chin it's a you ever seen that movie what's that movie no Bradley Cooper no no no what limitless for me it's like limitless I see every scenario I see 50 scenarios that's what it does Carl it makes you focus yeah well it's a powdered leaf it's just all natural and it's related

to the the coffee tree right yeah I do one shot maybe to calm down, but I think the thing that's really going to help you. Quit in the vodka. Don't drink. They'll smell it. They'll smell it for sure. They can't smell it at all. Not if you get mouthwash or you put in some cinnamon mint or some shit.

Everybody in there looks like the mayor of Chicago, dude. They can't smell shit at that point. I've been in there a little Beetlejuice. Everybody fucking is going to of Chicago, dude. They can't smell shit at that 22. I've been in there a little Beetlejuice. Nobody, everybody fucking is going to be fine, dude. Yeah, don't give a fuck. Just trying to get through the day. Yeah. But look, also, here's my thing.

Also, if you can't pass that test, you probably shouldn't be behind the fucking wheel, bro. And this is an obvious thing. We have to say this as human beings here. And Brendan has two children, and he should have said it. And you are probably going to have a couple kids climb out of that fucking urban crevasse. Dude, mutants. Crawl in that closet. Yeah.

You pour half a can of Similac into that thing, you're going to have a little family climb out of there in a month. But I'll say this, Bubba. You can't drink and drive. We can't condone that. No, I don't condone that. So sorry it took so long for everybody to get to that.

To wrap up. He finally got to it, though. Thank it though i'll just say if he has to do it but you should be this nervous for that fucking driving test yeah and the cure to nerves is preparation man the cure to nerves is preparation agreed preach don't drink and drive yeah don't drink and drive uh and also it's pretty easy test man there's cheat sheets out there You can take the test online It will give you the actual test There's three different ones so you can't memorize it There's three different tests We can find all three tests online And just memorize that shit and go in there and pass it

But again if you can't pass it Bubba I don't want you on the fucking road Because that test is so fucking easy dude I think he's more worried about the driving aspect of the test Actually having someone in with him. There's also Uber, big dog. Just fucking fuck your license. Uber around then. Dude, I fell asleep when we had drivers.

I remember falling asleep at the wheel and they made me get out of the vehicle. Interesting. Well, this guy, he's a waiter. He's becoming a regular. He's always got some pretty good submissions. Beautiful young man and nice to see him again. Mustache like mine.

Is his name Alan? Kyrick. Kyrick. Close. What up, Brendan? What up, Theo? It's Kyrick from Rhode Island again, and this time I've got a cat shark tank for you guys. Today we're talking cat's karaoke. You guys each take turns singing popular songs in front of each other.

I know Theo's got some experience from TPW. Stevie Weeby, who I'm sure is there, obviously has experience from his album, Banger. Brendan, I'm a little worried about you, but let me know what you guys think. Gang, gang, buzz, buzz. Well, Chris had that Young Chink album or something. What was that thing called?

Chink Smith? Chang Smith? Chang Smith, sorry. Easy mistake, one letter. Yeah, first of all, the guy made something called Chang Smith, okay? Chang. Chang.

Don't get confused, Chang. Also, Chet Hanks just dropped a new album, too. Yeah, and he should drop it even further, dude. That thing. No. White Boy Summer was awesome until you get to the second verse of that song. No, no, I like the whole song His new one is a slapper. I

Wish him the best though. Now. Do you hear his dad cut him off? He smokes we didn't do Tom Hanks fucking Forrest Gump cut his son off for smoking and drinking Tom Hanks Who couldn't even get out? Or off an island for years yeah the guy's obviously stoner dude he moved to greece didn't he is he in greece no well he got citizenship in greece but he lives here he lives in beverly yeah i wore i wore the white boy summer shirt the other day i went to watch rebirth brass band and wore my white boy let me hear his new track doug It's like good guys running, don't dance yet. Damn. Damn.

Love it. Love it. That's the style. I don't think it's all this way. You know what? No more. Why do you keep saying Tom Hanks? That's his dad. I got these bitches shook. Damn. I got you like a bug. Damn. But they don't know what it took. Damn.

Why do you keep saying Tom Hanks? That's his dad. What? That's his dad. That's Tom Hanks' son. No. Yeah. You don't know who Tom Hanks is?

His dad works on that train, the cartoon train. That's Tom Hanks' son? That's Tom Hanks' son. Yeah, dog. No. Bitch, I'm here for one night. Let's make the most of it. This is good. Oh, unbelievable.

It kind of looks like Tony. It's not bad. No, hell no, it's not bad. Yeah, this is a lot better, I think, than the White Boy Summer anthem. I like White Boy Summer, too. You don't really like it. You're trying to get him on your podcast. No, I like the... You bought the shirt.

Shut up, man. The shirt I love. No, I really like it You bought the shirt. Shut up, man. The shirt I love. The fucking shirt. No, I really like it. It's surprising. Before I heard the song. Man, it surprised me. You don't like White Boy Summer?

That's Tom Hanks' son, man. Go back to White Boy Summer. Go to White Boy Summer. That's Tom Hanks' son. I haven't had caffeine for 30 days today. God, what are you doing, dude? He's just got the same intro.

You've been watching too many fucking JREs. Get a little caffeine. Oh, that's what's going on. You know which caffeine I've had this morning? Dude, I ordered some fucking dried beer blood

off the internet. I'll be fine. Take it. Fuck it. Yeah. Fuck it. Turn it up. The beat.

Just a little bit. Yeah. Just a little bit. Yeah. White boy summer. I met a bad little shorty on the pole to dance. Get into the bag like it was her only chance. Rich bitch.

No, no, no. Them bands said fuck it. Then she went and made her only fans Boy white boy summer got your favorite Instagram Oh It was good. Yeah, I loved it. Yeah. And I loved it. Oh, he said sushi at Katana near the comedy store. He didn't say comedy store, though. Yeah, but Katana's next to the comedy store. The deep cut. Yeah.

He could have said comedy store. That'd be nice. It just never really hit a chorus that I would, that's what I was looking for. Oh, you're looking for the catchy chorus. Oh, my bad, Dr. Dre. Yeah. I was looking. Oh, my bad, Dr. Dre. bat dr dre i was oh my bat dr dre but dude this guy not dr dre how many views on that huh 700 million 700 762 000 that's a lot though

now the shark tank guy's idea chin's gonna play the course a few more than the episodes when i was on anderson tino's, which is his most viewed episode. I would like to say that. You're my most viewed. Is it really? Yeah. Oh, thanks, man. Yeah.

Thanks, dude. A couple on fire kids over in Mill now with you and me. Really? Yeah. That's how this started. So to avoid demonetization with this karaoke, we're going to have Chin know six songs. All the way through.

That are all written down there. Okay. So we can play them on there. And then we're going to try Chin knows six songs That are all written down there So we can play them on there And then we're going to try to sync the lyrics Now my allergies are popping So my voice might be a little off But you get the gist We got the gist So we just pick a song

Will you bring up the lyrics Whichever one is brought up Who wants to go first Stevie You're an actual musician. Yeah, I'll go first. You got to pull a song from here. Okay, no problem.

You have a piano in your house, don't you? Yeah, he does. I remember that. Oh, I got this. What song is it? Fast Car, Tracy Chapman. We're not supposed to tell us. We're supposed to guess.

Oh, no. No. Wait, where are the lyrics? Bring up the lyrics. Chin's going to fucking riff this thing. You know how talented Chin is, man? Let me think about the cadence. Yeah, I'm gonna fucking rip this thing. You know, you know, tell the chin is man Let me think about the cadence. I seen anything about the Browns all their cuts. You got the lyrics You know lyrics beautiful anthems out of them. I

Used to make love to a brother listen to Tracy Chapman It's like it listen to Nicki Minaj and lick this girl's butt. Ugh. Ugh. That's different from me and you. Oh, what a jam. Oh. How about Chin? Beautiful.

It was an Ultima. It was a Nissan Ultima. Where's the lyrics? They're coming. Okay. Oh, here we we go If I had One ticket to anywhere Maybe we'd make a deal

Maybe together we could It's like an old Asian witch So if you've got nothing to lose Maybe we'll make something If you've got nothing to lose That's amazing Sounds nice. I like Chin's guitar.

That's what I like. Hold up, give me a chance. Really belt this one. You went too fast. Convenience store, you know that line. Come on, guy. This place is turning into a shithole. If I'm Simon Cowell.

Hold on, man. If I'm Simon Cowell. Give me a chance. Give me a chance, man. Dude, you're not playing to the. I gave you seven stanzas, Papa. Give me a chance. I'm sorry.

You're right, man. Give me a chance. Let me get to the chorus, my man. Dude, aren't you a performer? Don't you have an album? Yeah, please. Don't shame me. I'm just saying.

You're shaming me, man. You're shaming him, dude. Hold up, man. Give me a chance. All right. He was playing off tempo. Remix. Give me a chance.

I want to get to the chorus. Please, please. You guys are making me sick. Yeah, we hit the chorus earlier. Go ahead. Just a little bit. Brendan, you're making me sick. Let me sing the chorus. Let me sing the chorus.

Let me sing the chorus. I'm nervous with my allergies now. The chorus? You want me to just go right now? Yeah, yeah. The chorus? Ready? Yeah.

What is this? Sorry. I've got to reply to some emails. He's tuning out. No, he's not. No, he's not. We're back in. Here we go.

Here we go. That was my bad. Here we go. Here we go. That was my bad. Okay. You got a fast car. I want a ticket to anywhere. Maybe we can make a deal. Maybe together we can go somewhere. Any place.

Start from zero. Got nothing to lose. Maybe we'll make something. Me, myself, I got nothing to prove. There you go. He's going. Me, myself, I got nothing to prove. There you go. He's going to kill the chorus, I feel. Yeah. You got a fast car.

I got a plan to get us out of here. Here. Working at the convenience store. There you go. Just a little bit of money. Don't have have drive too far Just cross the border into the city You sound like somebody giving

What gives the chorus do you know? I'm not. You're doing great. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Let me get to the chorus. Let me get to the chorus. You sound like you're going to fuck up. We're going to kill you. Hold on, hold on. You sound like you're going to fuck up. Get out of here. This body's too young to look like it.

It's a sad song. Where's the chorus? That's what I did. Where's the chorus? The chorus. Here it is. Where's the chorus? Here it is. Where's the chorus? You went through it seven times, the chorus. Here it is right now.

Not yet. You've got a fast car. Is it fast enough so we can fly away? You've got to make a decision. Leave tonight and live, die this way. Now the chorus is coming. Here it is right here. And the screen went blank

So remember Okay you're done Alright alright I'm done You sound like a burn victim Trying to give driving directions to someone Take a ride up here my friend Get out of the car Dude don't be nice man Take a ride at the convenience store Just put me. Get out of the car. Dude, be nice man.

Take a ride at the convenience store. Just put me in the back of the car. Sorry bro. I was just saying you sound like somebody with severe burns. I'm sorry. Like who's in a full body cast. It was hard because he was playing. Got to the end of the road.

Take a look at the swamp. Why are you doing this? Take a ride. Take it easy. Because you're a burn victim. Why are you doing this? Take a ride. Take it easy. Because you're a burn victim. Because you're a burn victim. You're a third degree burn. Oh, dude.

Because of the burns, you can't move. He's like, you're out of gas, Charlie. You want me to pick down the gas? Yeah. Let's try it one more time, man. You're going to want to get some gas. Dude, stop doing that pose. I can't help it.

Dude, that's traditional burn victim pose. Don't do that anymore. My bad, man. I'm sorry. Don't do that anymore. My bad, man. I'm sorry. Oh, thankfully. Actually, that was all a ruse just to let the dog escape. Oh, here we go. Metallica, enter Sandman.

Oh, there you go. There you go. Enter Sandman. That's how I felt when I joined this podcast, dude. Let's go, B. Ching, get your fucking energy up. I'm trying. I'm trying. I'm trying.

Chin's 50 years old on Kratom, dude. He's got energy. Okay. So should I leave it up a little bit for you? There you go, B. Good job, too, Steve. Let's give Steve a round of applause. Oh, don't do that now.

After you did the burn victim. Don't do that. Don't do that. Don't do that. Don't start dying until you get over there. You're going to be fine. The song makes me want to break stuff. Let's go. This is good, man.

Here we go. I love this. This is fun. Yeah, hell yeah. This is fun, man. I'm glad I came here today. I'm nervous oh you'll be fine dude hold on i'll catch it oh i'm nervous.

You got this, Beezy. Get in there. How far do I have to go? Huh? Just to the chorus? Just till you beat Crow Cop. You got it, bro. Is it loading?

It's a legendary lead-up. That's part of the song. Yeah, part of it's a lead-up. Is Jim playing a legendary lead up That's part of the song Yeah Part of it's the lead up And is Chin playing The legendary lead up? Okay Oh there we go Oh Chin's rocking out

Chin's on an electric guitar? No he can fucking Thrash is what I think They say Slay This is awesome I wish I had a wig on Right now Say your prayers little one Don't forget This is awesome. I wish I had a wig on right now.

Say your prayers, little one. Don't forget my son. To include everyone. There you go. I tuck you in. Keep me free from sin. Feel the same when he comes. Sleep with one eye open.

Rip your pillow tight Exit life Exit this Take the night Yeah Take my hand Off to the new land She'll never, never live. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Morph? Something's wrong. Shut the law. Here we thought the whole night. And they all are the lie. Snow White. Bring the boys from the night To the fire And things that will bite you Sleep with one eye open

Grip in your pillow tight Shut it down Exit this Exit this. It's her night. Take my hand. Oh, my God. We're off to Never Never Land.

Thank you, Dark Confident. Good night. Dude. Let's go. Keep touching me, dude. It's your turn. Perfection. It's your turn, man. Keep touching me dude It's your turn Perfection It's your turn man

Keep touching me Thanks dude Oh man Stevie man I will say this It's always more fun When you're here Okay

Jim crashed that thing And I mean that man Killed it Okay Now if you don't like it You can pick another one I got extreme more than words Oh

Perfect Is that Metallica too? Is that Metallica too? No, that's extreme. Oh, perfect. Hey, you can't look at the other ones. We might have to do round two. What are you doing? Brendan cheated.

No, no, he picked the one he picked, Brendan. Yeah, this is a perfect one for Theo. Is it? Oh, yeah. I don't know. It's an old school, but that's a super popular song this is a good one don't be nervous can you hear it oh i know this song oh yeah i love this song shout out to my boy nino

betancourt too man who was in this band you have to do the standard tune though oh this is it's a good song there's lyrics yeah all right so don't even oh you know you got because it's in a different tune okay yeah just do it in like a c-flat

okay oh I can't wait for this this song is gay dude I'm sorry huh what it's not

it's a good song dude the women love this song say YAG dude is that a gag yeah you're right this shit's YAG, dude. Is that a gag? Yeah, you're right. This shit's YAG. Will you start over?

Sorry. It's okay. So it doesn't help you at all to start with the sound? No. So literally, if they could just see the lyrics, I think Theo would know when to come in, right? Yeah. Good luck being the Andrew Sandman.

When you come in, I'll press play because we're right at the beginning. I'd like being Andrew Sandman. When you come in, I'll press play because we're right at the beginning. Saying I love you is not the words I want to hear from you. It's not that I want you not to say but if you only knew how easy it would be to show me how you feel more than words is all you have to do.

Then you wouldn't have to say that you love me. When he sings, he turns to Asians. It's strange. No, he's been like this. No. What will you do if my heart was torn in two? More than words to show you

feel your love is real for me. What would you say if I took those words away? Then you couldn't make things new. Here's my saying say I love you. La dee da da dum. Dum dum dum dum. More than words. More than words.

More than words. More than words. We love you. More downwards We love you At the casino Yeah! Yeah! What? The voice is...

Out of body experience, Papi. Thank you very much dude You didn't know Theo turns into a young Chinese man when he sings Dude yeah My vocals My vocals get so Vietnamese when I hit some of those notes

And I know that I definitely feel like I'm in the Fashion district We'll do it again in a couple weeks Send in songs Chin should learn That was good I definitely feel like I'm in the fashion district. We'll do it again in a couple weeks. Send in songs Chin should learn. That was good. Oh, yeah.

Ooh, I love that. That was so funny. I love that. Sweet. Okay. Well. Let's close it out with just a couple cat confessions. Yeah. You got any confessions?

What about you, Spunk Colonel? You got any confessions for us back there? Spunk Colonel? You got any confessions? Nope. Fist on the back. What's up, dog? Yeah, what you got for us, huh? Something you never told anybody. Winker bean, what you got?

Something I never told anybody? I don't know. Long Island Ice 2, what's up, dog? I don't know. I'm a pretty open person. I tell... When's the first time you ever drank? Tell us about that real quick and do not make it long.

When I was junior in high school. What happened? Where were you? My house. Did you have sex? Not that night, no. We ended up getting into a brawl. That's called a domestic dispute. Okay? When it's involved with a woman we say domestic dispute. Okay? Even if it went three rounds, five

rounds. You ever been to jail? Yeah. For what? Drinking. Yeah. You got a drinking problem, son? Nah, I do it rarely, and when I do it, yeah, I do have a problem. You need to drink some of that Mountain Marrow, brother, some of that HGH. I've been trying. I actually got a lot of DMs from people who watch this show that have been hitting me up like, yo, if you need steroids, I got you.

So I've been looking into that a little bit. There we go. That's fans giving back. Have Bradley Martin Does he know anybody I'm sure He has to work out though I work out every day

He drinks a lot though He came over Monday To the studio Hungover as fuck Talking about I had a bender yesterday Did he He's young

You forget how young he is Have a style bender dude Take care of yourself Start kicking some bags Let's see what we got man But thank I'm glad you're alive Bubba.

And let's do something else. Stevie in here looking young. You got that haircut on. Yeah, you look fresh, man. Where'd you get a Philly fade? Damn. Oh, you got the Kim Jong-un. Kim Jong-un. Classic Kim Jong-un.

You got that rapping on. That's that Kim Jong-un. Kim Jong-un, baby. I used to have that. That's a good fade, man. Oh, that's so fun. But yeah, this person has a confession. It fits for the fights

we just had in the past weekend. Hey, guys. Got this little confession I need to get off my little chest. It's not too bad. I mean,

it's kind of a dick move. Get to it. But I just got my own apartment in outreland about a year or so and uh you know i'll let all the homies come over if they want to watch the fight you know a little boxing you know whatever whatever they want to watch baby you're a nice guy you know we all usually you know throw in on the fight you know about that'd be like 10 20 ahead you know we watched we watched the it didn't he what i need to get off my chest is i don't ever actually throw in on these fights i just have everyone cash at me and then you know i just use that

little stream you know that little that little freebie uh you know so that's good hustle tv they don't even know the difference. It's a good hustle. That shit start lagging. I don't know, man. The Wi-Fi acting up. That shit real quick. You see the ad popped up? Yeah, that's my confession is I have all the homies come over and they throw me about $80 to watch the fight.

$80 a pop-up? I don't pay nothing. I just keep all that money. Oh, total. Brandon didn't even listen to the first part. I thought he was charging. He's won $80. What do you, total. Oh, total. Brendan didn't even listen to the first part. I thought he was charging each one $80. What do you suggest to this guy, Chen? What do you think?

What do you share with this gentleman? That's a douchebag move, especially those of his homies, too. Yeah. That's a douchebag move. He's pocketing the money. But are the homies bringing over all the snacks and drinks and the girls? Yeah, beer. You know what I'm saying?

Yeah, and the money. The homies are just bringing over everything. Yeah, you're right. Oh, is he providing snacks? What I meant to say is he providing snacks. That's what you meant. Yes. That's what you meant.

Yeah, it's his new apartment. They're paying for foot traffic. Pay double if you want a legal stream. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For $10 to even walk in someone's house is a deal these days. Okay? So I think, yeah, bub, I say upcharge him. That's what I say.

Stevie, what do you say to this kind of thing? Have you ever had to do this sort of thing? You illegally stream shit? Nah, I've never done that, but I can see where he's coming from. Dana put some guy in prison

because of it. Yeah. Yeah. So he says there's no evidence, though. It's a conspiracy theory. Dana will voice track this dude, I think. Dana does not like you legal stream

Yeah, no, it's a huge hit on their business Yeah, all right. We got let's do one more stream east live Yeah, I was calling make a confession back in the day when there I was 19 I Was uh Like stupid stuff real bad and I stole a laptop from the church

and they didn't like that too much but they couldn't prove it was me I was feeling real guilty about it the Lord knows I sold it for like a half ounce a week The Lord knows. I feel really guilty about it. The Lord knows. I sold it for like a half ounce of weed. Oh, good deal for the weed dealer.

Yeah, and that was about it. That was about it. That was about it. Dude, you're getting a dollar. Well, you got to fast pass to hell, my man. Stealing a laptop from a church, Selling it for some weed, bro. Selling it for the devil's lettuce. What are you doing, dog?

He did say he used to do it, so hopefully he's reformed. And look, we appreciate you sharing it, first of all, man. I know it's tough to get it off your chest. Obviously, there's some remorse inside of you as a human, and it's tough, man. It's tough not to steal from the church. They leave all the shit out. They also pass that kind of bucket of money around, you know what I'm saying? And they're not paying taxes either, so they can write that thing off. I'd like to know what kind of church, too.

Yeah. Because then I'll judge you. If they have a snake cage in the front, then maybe give it back. Bro, have you ever seen that religious guy who thought he could talk to rattlesnakes and bit them in the fucking neck? Did he die? I don't know if he did. Did he die?akes. Oh, yeah. And he got bit by them. And bit him in the fucking neck. And he died. Oh, it's classic. I don't know if he... Did he die? Yeah.

He definitely not doing it. The dad died. The son is still back at it. Yep. Still fucking with them rattles. And shout out to my boy, Peace, that died. There was a... I talked about him this past weekend.

He died last... How? The other day. How did he pass? He's in a motorcycle accident. Oh, man. Motorcycle's so dangerous, man. It was crazy, dude.

He was a good buddy? Yeah, I was staying at the Sober Living with him for a week. He's in there. No, not a good buddy, but just a new friend. I just met him. A couple nights, we're all watching the games and stuff, chilling, chatting. Drinking, smoking. The second day, he gets a motorcycle.

The third day, get in the accident. Been in a coma since then. He just passed away. Rest in peace. Yeah, peace. And peace was his name, too. Yeah, rest in peace, peace. So you're kind of destined for that if you have rest. I mean, everybody's going to die, but when. Rest in peace. Yeah, peace. And peace was his name, too. Yeah, rest in peace, peace. So you're kind of destined for that if you have rest.

I mean, everybody's going to die, but when you're at peace, they just have to say rest in to them. Motorcycles are too dated. Look fun as fuck. I get dressed while I'm stuck on the 405. I see a motorcycle pass down the lane. I'm like, God, that looks fun. Not worth it, though, man. Yeah.

It's risque, man. Especially if you have some kids or if you have dark buttocks full of semen. Yep. You're already playing them dark arts. Yeah. It's risque, man. Especially if you have some kids or if you have a dark buttocks full of semen. Yep. You're already playing in them dark arts. Yeah. You should name it. Ooh, does it have a name?

What'd you say? Give it a first and middle name. Should we maybe go out with a little palate cleanser chin? This is one of our choices. Yeah. Time of Your Life by Green Day. Oh, yes.

And look, guys, thanks for sharing whatever the crimes you committed or the things you were carrying. Hopefully you feel better, man. Let that luggage go, dude. Just do something. Pay it forward.

Do something nice. Stop by a church and do something good. Oh, how about this? Living amends. Buy him another new laptop to replace that old one. Just donate money to the church, though. Living amends, dude. Living amends.

Before we sign out, dude, you're on tour now, right? You can make an amends. Yeah. I'm the best in the world. Back on tour. I'm on tour, man. I wouldn't say best in the world, but I would say. You're up there, Bubba.

Well, that's nice of you, man. You're on your way, man. I appreciate the nice words. Just want to let you know I got some, I'm taping my Netflix special in Nashville out in the Central East this year. But also I've got some dates. I believe it's the 8th, 9th, and 10th in Huntsville, Alabama. Those tickets are on sale right now. I'll be practicing the material for the special.

In case you didn't get to see Dark Arts Tour, you can see it there. You know, COVID delayed us, but, you know, it can't stop us anymore. So we're moving forward. Tons of tour dates at theovon.com slash tour. Charleston, Albany, Buffalo uh buffalo dear god different places you'll love it all over make sure to get any tickets through theovon.com slash tour anywhere else is a scam gang thank you portland of boise is pretty close is it savannah six and a half hour drive i'm in portland maine oh oh that's, but I bet you would go.

But I'm going to Maine, man. A lot of people are like, nobody ever comes to Maine, dude. Maine lobster. I decided I'm going to Maine, and I'm also going to Burlington, Vermont. As you guys are watching this, this Friday and Saturday, I'm at the Ha Ha Shop and Friends. Eric Griff and I have some other monster comics coming out. This Friday and Saturday?

Yep, this Friday, Saturday. Two shows Friday, two shows Saturday at the Ha. Those are almost sold out, so get tickets now. And then end of the month, I will be in Tacoma, Washington at the Tacoma Comedy Club. Get your tickets at thickboy.com. The Tacoma aroma, baby. Chin, hit it.

This is at every fucking graduation? Another turn and find a fox stuck in the rut. Time to grab you by the wrist, direct you where you go. Start it over, Chin. Please, Bubba. Okay. In spare rib, you come in on the choruses. Spare Rib. is to direct you where to go. So make the best of this test.

Don't ask why. It's not a question. It's a lesson learned in time. It's something unpredictable. And it's right. I hope you had the time of your life. Starnum Ernie, come in. It's only special, isn't it?

So take the photographs and still frames in your mind. Hang it on the shelf in good health and good time. Tattoos of memories and skin on the trial for what it's worth it was worth all the while something unpredictable but in the end it's right

I hope you had the time of your life nice flute, dude. It's a beautiful song. Oh! Who the fuck was this earlier? Stevie. Damn, Jack, what?

Damn. Jack. Yeah. Hope you had the time of your life. I hope you had the time of your life. That's it, baby. Gang, gang. Stevie, thank you so much for being here, man.

We love you. You bet. Brennan and Theo, fighter in weight. I got to go in and go hard in the paint. I do not think I am in flow. Black rifle coffee, I'm ready to go. I need a sponsor. I am a monster.

About to open up with this at my concert. Flow is contagious. Brows are outrageous. Th am a monster. About to open up with this at my concerts. Flow is contagious. Brows are outrageous. Thicker than girls that are Instagram famous. Damn. Hungry like I'm fresh off keto. Seeing red like Andrew Santino. Every song I hit like the great Bambino.

Brennan ate the queso and the quesoritos. But everything's gonna be fine. Hate on me. I do not mind. Theo looking like the type of dude that got a pack of matches in his pockets at all times. They sliding into my DMs. A couple of matches in his pockets at all times. They sliding into my DMs. A couple of you tried but couldn't beat him.

Quit playing like Nintendo DS. You don't want to smoke like Joey Diaz. Meaning y'all edible. Just got my eyebrows threaded and I'm feeling incredible. Brandon's son hit me up. He said it's too loud in the club. Can you pick me up? King and the sting. King and the sting.

King and the sting. We sting. Rap king. King in the sting, king in the sting, king in the sting, bee sting rat king, king in the sting, king in the sting, got the bees in the trap, got the cheese on a string, king in the sting, king in the sting, king in the sting, bee sting rat king, king in the sting, king in the sting, bee sting rat king King and the sting, king and the sting Got the bees in a trap, got the cheese on a string