The Golden Hour - Episode 138: Skoaltron
Episode Date: September 10, 2021Erik Griffin and SteeBee WeeBee join Theo and Brendan again and the guys talk Fleshlights, more of SteeBee's sex toy butt, Brendan's Thiccc Boy dildos, hooking up with older women..., all new KATS Confessions featuring Gianni Paolo, Lingerie League Football, all new Relationship Advice submissions and much more! Get your King and the Sting merch at katsmerch.com See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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No, Theo and Brendan should spend minimum $35,000 on a ring.
No, y'all could roll like that.
Nah, Theo.
If you ain't spending minimum $35,000 on a ring, you ain't shit.
Yeah, exactly.
Just put that out there.
I would like to announce myself as not shit, bro.
Dang, dang.
Buzz Buzz.
Back off my broccolini.
Get your life together.
It is.
Don't touch me, bro.
I'm not touching you, dude.
This is the greatest show on earth.
Can you imagine him getting in the Uber with that, though?
Yeah.
No, he's going to put it in a box. It's, in fact, the only way that I can imagine him getting in the Uber with that though? No, he's going to put it in a box.
It's in fact the only way that I can imagine him getting in the Uber.
Yeah, me too.
I can literally imagine him standing outside and he can't open the door because he's holding it in both of his hands.
Hey man, you put the seat down?
He's like... Can you put the seat down for me?
And then when he squeezes it, a little cum comes out.
Hey dude, you're taking it too far.
No, don't make that noise yeah too much no dude
i'm gonna wash it soap it and i'm putting a ziploc baggie huh oh yeah that'd be nice oh wow
well the butt's like where'd you get it steve i want to like see it was a gift it was a gift
don't worry about it it was a gift what do you think i don't think that's a sponsor. The butt?
Do the butt.
Oh, yeah.
You guys could get a bunch of shit.
Nah, we'll probably turn that one down.
Or a fleshlights.
I don't think they're around anymore.
I think it seems kind of around. You know, fleshlights are around.
Yeah, fleshlights are around.
Fleshlights got big on roadies.
It seems kind of racial, I feel like.
Fleshlight?
No, I got the white one.
No, they make all colors.
I got all different colors.
Oh, you got it all?
Yeah, I got it all.
No, it's not like you have the word, like, white fleshlight.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, it's just fleshlight.
You can pick. But they also have black fleshlight. Yeah, I know. They do. Whatever color you not like you have the word white fleshlight. You know what I mean? Yeah, it's just fleshlight. You can pick.
But they also have black fleshlight.
Yeah, I know.
They do.
Whatever color you like, dude.
But that's a wholesome sponsor.
They have mint?
They have mint fleshlights?
Mint.
Green?
Like mint flavored kind of mint.
No, there's no flavor for your dick.
You're not eating it out like a son.
You're not going.
Bro.
Did you know fleshlight got big because-
Dude, people do it different the guy
who started on it what aubrey marcus the guy who started on it own flashlight it feels fantastic
i mean eucalypt you got that eucalyptus flashlight dude dude that's actually a good idea it is isn't
it because you can eat you can eat it too that's just essential oils you just throw some essential
oil yeah you can make your own yeah yeah, yeah, yeah. Make your own what? Oils? Lavender.
Fleshlight, whatever flavor you want.
Peppermint pad.
Yeah, you use latex gloves.
Sure.
And lotion.
Dude, why don't you just go for a run or something?
Yeah, but why don't you do some CrossFit, Stevie?
You know?
No, I don't know why I'm tapping you out.
Because I think your heart wants to say yes.
That is the healthier choice, isn't it?
Yeah, man.
Have a salad, dude.
Have a salad.
Don't do that.
Is it unhealthy to-
Or maybe watch a movie.
Yeah.
Have you listened to this podcast?
14% of it is Stevie battling-
Not to bring up the ass.
Yeah, with the burning bush in his life, which is this black buttock.
Do I bring it up a lot?
I wouldn't say a lot. I mean, it's great. I think it's good. I think you're black buticus. Do I bring it up a lot? I wouldn't say a lot.
I mean, it's great.
I think it's good.
I think you're trying to-
I think we bring it up more.
Well, we're putting it to bed next week.
I'll bring it.
You forgot.
See, that's growth.
You keep saying this.
No, because I thought we're doing the karaoke thing this week.
You could burn it, dude.
Oh, that's right.
No, I'm not burning it.
No, I don't want to sacrifice it.
Like, what?
I think so.
That's the way to move on, man.
Do you know the health hazards involved
with i mean that will smell up the air carcinogen yeah carcinogens or whatever it might be frowned
carcinogens we'll just put it in the dumpster yeah there's there's uh fire shit all over the
place you're not gonna burn it in here that's what he wants to do no no he said that oh you
want to do in the parking lot you do it like the mob and get some like acid yeah shoot it
put okay you can shoot it but you can also put it like you know how do it in the parking lot? Why don't you do it like the mob and get some like acid? Yeah, shoot it.
Okay, you can shoot it, but you can also put it like, you know how they dispose of the body?
They put it in like a bathtub with like.
Ooh, put it in a chair and put like a light over it.
What would that do? And question it?
Yeah.
What would that do?
Stories for days.
Tell us the truth.
Oh, we can put acid.
We can melt it with some chemicals.
You guys are going to hell, man.
What do you mean by the light?
Hold up.
How are you going to hell?
I haven't gone past that.
The mafia thing, man.
You got to get the mafia, bro.
What about the mafia?
Come on, man.
When they dispose of the body, they don't bury it.
Oh, they do.
They melt it down with like acid.
They put him in a chair.
They're like, where's Randy?
They put him in a vat of acid.
And he never tells them.
That's what we got to do.
Ozark style.
Yeah.
Can we do it on the
table i'd rather not no we just got this table it's great content is this it i don't think it
is man yeah you don't think that's good content i mean i don't know i don't 500 000 views right
there dude is it yeah you're overestimating the bro no one's done that that's new next level shit
well but what it does to us as humans, like...
What?
No, dude.
That's good branding.
Just being that close to something that you've fucked vigorously...
What?
But it's a healthy choice.
We're putting it to bed.
I know, but...
This guy's finishing and starting sex with me, I'm sure, is the inchworm, okay?
I don't think fucked vigorously is a term.
You don't think...
What do you think he's making slow love to his black butt?
Put on some,
Steve is fucked.
Steve is like,
God damn you.
I bet Steve gives that thing the biz
when he gets home.
Everybody looks at him,
are you talking shit?
Oh, you're talking shit?
Do you put a robe on?
Brendan,
you put a robe on and turn on like.
Brendan, you put this in the closet.
I don't talk to it.
You don't talk shit to it?
No, I don't talk to it at all.
Like, oh, you got attitude today?
It's an object.
You don't say nothing.
It's just an object.
Okay.
It sounds very, you keep it in the closet.
It sounds really Underground Railroad-y to me.
Yeah.
You think there's something psychological about that? The whole thing has kind of a Frederick Douglass vibe to me, I think.
No, no, no, no.
I feel like the butt is in there going, we shall.
No, because I do a podcast in there, man.
You think I want my guests to see that kind of thing?
Shut up!
Shut up!
Then all the little semen inside of it sing in the background.
We shall overcome, come.
We shall overcome, come.
Just a little out of my head.
I'm going to let you.
My sperm don't talk like that.
Sometimes you see it run to the kitchen
for some water.
You need help, Stevie.
You know what? I'm going gonna start hitting meetings again about that i think get in one of those centers yeah what do you know
yeah yeah yeah i need to go to a center i think a sex addiction center i feel like you'd meet some
hot chicks there dude brandon brandon you're not that's not helping with this recovery here
you're spitballing ideas yeah yeah I need to go to a different stage.
This is the guy that sells drugs outside the fucking NA meetings.
You know what I mean?
He out there with like, what you need?
How's your recovery?
I got something to spit.
Brennan's outside the eater, outside of Orange Theory selling thick boy sandwiches.
You know what I'm saying?
That dude don't care, bro.
Yeah, he had curves.
You know what I mean?
He had curves out there like, what's up, girl? He's selling whiskey and bicycles at the same time one care, bro. Yeah, he had curves. You know what I mean? He had curves.
I'd be like, what's up, girl?
He's selling whiskey and bicycles at the same time one time, bro.
You're like, oh, you need some whiskey and you need to be on a bike.
He got a gift basket with honey buns.
His audience is getting smaller because they're dying off.
That's why I do all of them.
He's going to come out with thick boy coughing soon, bro.
Oh, thick boy fleshlights.
Man, I don't know if we're in that market, my man.
What?
Now you reject him.
No, you wouldn't sell fleshlights.
We'd have to sell the dildo.
Yeah, yeah.
Get your Brendan dildo.
Get your Stevie.
Why are we talking about all this, man?
I knew it.
You know Theo don't like this. You guys know that the black butt and Theo dick got the same.
It's this.
Look, man.
Have you guys ever been to Indiana?
Yeah.
That's Steve.
Everything.
His scale is always this.
Man, I had a good ass burger today.
That'd be a top seller, dude.
Top seller.
Dude, my cousin has asthma, dude.
Is it this kind of asthma? top seller, dude. Dude, my cousin has asthma, dude. Is it this kind of asthma?
Top seller, dude.
The doctor's trying to get it.
Asking him questions.
How you been feeling, Stevie?
Feeling like this.
How about your headache?
That would be a top seller.
Man, you need to stay off my comments on my kid, man.
He always taking a shot at little Boston.
Yeah.
So they're working now.
So they're working.
Where is he, Lake Havasu?
Mommy waiting for me to skirt up in my boat.
What'd Chris say?
He probably already deadlifts more than me.
Camping trip or what was that?
Chris, we don't need you commenting on a child.
Okay, dude.
I'll handle that for us.
That's Theo's lane, my man. Yeah, dude for us that's theo's lane my man yeah dude now
there's brendan's ex-wife it's good that they're still close hey his new wife way hotter his new
wife way hotter than this one dude that's actually a little horse that's a good picture man you're
just a giant yeah i'm a giant that horse had some issues why Why are you dressed like Sinead O'Connor, though, dog? I don't know how to funeral.
Dude, you look.
That's that horse funeral tire, dog.
Yeah, it's been 60 hours.
I'm here.
Yeah.
And my son sees this horse and goes, dad, look at that horse with the antenna.
I said, ain't no antenna, son.
Oh, that thing got that wand on it, huh?
Yeah, it's a big black toy dick.
Eric, that's a horse like you, man.
Mixed?
Yeah, it's got the gray beard.
You're basically like
your own little apartheid over here, man.
I don't find anyone
but you guys been on horses? Yeah, a long time ago, yeah.
Wait, why are all these horses so ashy?
Oh, that is true.
That's just the mix of them.
Ashy?
That's not ashy.
What do you mean?
That's colorization.
No, it's not ashy.
That's salt and pepper, man.
That's the white fur with the dark...
What do you think?
You grew up in a...
Do you guys have a lot of Nepal or whatever?
They got horses in that horse country?
Dude, we're not from Nepal.
We're Korean.
It's a whole different country, my man.
My man.
Was it the same stuff to you?
I mean,
it's not the same,
bro,
but you guys definitely know.
You guys have,
you know.
I don't know anyone from Nepal.
But you guys get intel.
You been on a horse,
Eric?
Yeah.
Like,
you're comfortable with horses?
No,
no.
I don't think so.
It was a complete nightmare.
Yeah.
And you know what?
I think those horses are smart.
They know you got no business on them.
Correct.
So this horse, and I was trying to be like, come on now.
This horse was like, motherfucker.
I tell him, I'm like, my horse does not want to do this.
She goes, it is the end of the summer.
They're kind of over it.
I'm like, then I don't want to be on this fucking thing.
Yeah, why am I on this?
And then we're going down the trail, and my horse, my girl's horse, straight up fight.
Her horse.
On the trail?
Yes.
Was this on Spirit Airlines? It was this on spirit airlines is world star
my fucking her horse kicks my horse in the goddamn neck oh jesus and my horse bucks up i was in
saudi arabia going i'm sorry i'm saying i was in saudi arabia when i rode a horse oh well what were
you doing out there arabian nights though yeah oh comedy yeah i was doing comedy. Oh, shit. In Saudi Arabia? How'd that go? Damn, dude. It is what it is.
Did you bring merch?
You could, but I didn't.
I didn't want to be the- Did you bring merch?
It's just water.
Yeah.
I brought hopes and dreams.
Yeah.
Get your bottle of water in the back.
The merch is just, it's a polio vaccine.
I actually been to Saudi Arabia twice, and this time was completely different.
This time, it was like the prince that took over.
He's opened the place up.
Women are driving.
A lot of talking shit.
You could be in the same room, and there's music.
The Backstreet Boys were there when I was there.
Damn.
Dude, that makes me think.
I think, Stevie, you would be a young prince, I feel like.
Don't y'all feel like that?
There you go.
That's more like it.
What would your rules be
like right in the beginning?
Well, he'd be an older prince, right?
Because he's 50.
Yeah, but they don't know, dude.
I don't know either.
Well, yeah,
but the princes are always old
because the king and queen
are always like 172 years old.
Oh, it's like that movie
Last Emperor.
Yeah.
Yeah.
The Golden Child.
Dude, that would be great if you were a prince, man.
What would some of your rules be?
Because they bring you out on a pillow in the beginning.
I would be fair.
Would you be like Joffrey from Game of Thrones?
No.
No.
I would be fair to my peoples, yeah.
What would some of your rules be?
What time is breakfast?
Probably around 2 or 3 p.m.
Oh, yeah.
This whole workday is just completely thrown off now.
You know what I mean?
It's like a four-day work week.
Yeah, my sleeping schedule
is not the best.
My sleeping schedule
is not the best.
Would you have a whole herd of girls?
A harem?
Yeah.
Well, that's how they all did it
back in the day.
They all had harems.
Don't look.
Don't look.
He's asking about you.
I'm not talking about back in the day.
We're talking about 2022, Steve.
Like a polygamous community?
Sure.
Huh. Let me think about that. Sounds like a lot Like a polygamist community? Sure. Huh.
Let me think about that.
Sounds like a lot of work, though, right?
Yeah, probably no more than five.
Oh, okay.
That makes sense.
What ages do you think?
Mid-20s.
Okay.
And wink if you mean younger.
No, not younger.
No, I watch granny porn.
I like them a little bit older, yeah.
So you have 25, 45? I would have some gr I like them a little bit older. You have 25?
I have some grannies in the mix.
Grannies what age?
67?
Okay.
70?
What's the oldest you've legit been with, Steve?
Pretty old.
Pretty old.
Pretty old.
The Rat King had to catch a flight, so your boy stuck with the Reeds.
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Bet on my Broncos.
What's up, man?
That's right.
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DraftKings is safe, secure, reliable.
You can take your money whenever you want at your convenience.
Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app now.
Use promo code KATS to receive $200 in free bets
when you place a $1 bet on any week one game.
That's promo code KATS to get your free $200 in free bets instantly
this week at DraftKings Sportsbook.
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Must be 21 or older.
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Probably around that age, 60-something.
How old were you?
38.
Oh, wow.
Funeral hopping, huh? Yeah. 65, huh? And you didn't, wow. Funeral hopping, huh?
Yeah.
65, huh?
And you didn't need to use a condom, huh?
No, she had one of them.
She was ready to go.
Yeah, she had her own condom.
And at that point, it's like, I feel like the vagina and buttocks kind of merge.
It's like a vagina.
Well, it's like just a big hole.
Yeah, you can get in there.
It's a vagina.
Was there anything surprising about sex with an older woman?
Were you like, well, damn.
Yeah, because she's been around the block.
She was a talker, too.
Yeah.
A talker?
Yeah, she talked to me.
Of course, she has her husband passed away, dude.
You know, this is not good for me.
If I want to do the recovery thing, this is not really healthy, is it?
I'm sorry I brought it up, man.
I shouldn't have said anything, too.
I'm sorry.
Hey, last question on the granny stuff.
Yeah.
Did she come on to you? Or did you come on?
It was like a mutual thing. Yeah. Oh like you were
D. Oh she on social media. No, this is I don't think I was on
He's probably in the parking lot of where he lives dude. Yeah fair. Yeah Wow
You've seen his place that the oldest it see anybody beat 65 in here with the handrails everywhere. Yeah
Yeah, you guys have like an outdoor area where like a bum can just live
Yeah, there's some I mean is that wrong older women
Yeah, I'm not going to you know, that's like the flip of side of like yeah people you say yeah
Yeah, I think 60 what is an
age where you think that you have to really shut down sexually fellas I think
it just depends on what your goals are in the relationship so if you want to
have kids I say you trying to like I want to be a dad 67 ain't the chick you
want start with hard path that's a hard path right cuz what if you it is gonna
be so he's gonna have four bones in his body.
Yeah, it's going to be Theo.
Is your dad old?
Yeah, he's going to be working on King in the States.
How old was your dad when he had you?
77-0.
Oh, good for him.
For guys, it's different.
For guys, it's different.
I'm just saying, like, for girls, 67 is tough, right?
I don't even think they can, I don't even know.
So that's what I'm saying.
After 40, other than that, if kids are not an option, then does it matter what age?
I don't think it matters.
I mean,
if it's a banging 60 year old,
you know,
you're so shallow.
You don't have to be banging.
It's about the connection.
Oh yeah,
you right.
Yeah.
Listen,
Helen Mirren,
that's a bad bitch right there.
Let's see.
Well,
Elizabeth Hurley's 50,
I think.
No,
no,
no,
no,
no,
Elizabeth Hurley,
she's still young, relatively speaking. She's 50. J-Lo's 50. Well, Elizabeth Hurley's 50, I think, too. No, no. No, Elizabeth Hurley, she's still young, relatively speaking.
She's 50.
J-Lo's 50.
Sign me up.
That's what I'm saying.
So 50 ain't old.
Especially these days.
Look at Helen Mirren.
She's still bad.
Wait, was she in?
That's a bad chick right there.
Or Sigourney Weaver.
Oh, Sigourney, I'd Weaver, dog.
You know what I'm saying?
But Helen Mirren is like, I don't even know how old she is.
She might be like 70 or something
I don't know
But she still got it
She still got that thing
Look at Misha Tate dog
76
She's 76
Look at her
Can you pull up another picture of her
Nick
You know Vin Diesel
Damn look at her back
Let me take a look
Let me take a look
Damn back in the day
She was gorgeous
Oh she was a looker
Yeah
What about the lady
That played on
Oh that's a beautiful woman
Yeah Hold on? Oh, that's a beautiful woman. Yeah.
Well, hold on, bro.
Oh, yeah.
Well.
We're saying she's aging gracefully, Theo.
She looks good.
Your question was, is there an age we should shut it off?
And what I'm saying is, look at this 78-year-old woman.
I'm saying there's no age.
I mean, look at her.
I'd have to cut off at 45.
I like to hike and shit.
Brandon, look at her body, dude.
70-year-old? Oh, God. We look at her body. 70-year-old?
We ain't hiking with no 70-year-old.
But look at her physique, dude.
You're a monster.
Yeah.
Who raised you?
You are just.
Oh, you would date a 70-year-old?
I'm not saying that.
We're going with the question.
But somebody needs to offer.
You think I'm hiking?
She looks good.
We're not talking about the things you're saying. Like you want to hike with your dad. I'm not eating dinner at 5 p.m. You You think I'm hiking? She looks good. We're not talking about the things you're saying.
Like, you want to hike with Jan.
I'm not eating dinner at 5 p.m.
You know what I'm saying?
Lights out at 6.15.
Well, look, yeah.
I'm trying to watch my shows and shit, bro.
He just woke up in his kingdom.
They just had breakfast.
Yeah, we were talking about it.
Yeah.
They don't even know what breakfast is.
They don't even call it breakfast.
Brandon, look at her physique.
Brandon, look at her physique.
Come on, dude.
Teddy's still smashing.
She's a very voluptuous.
She looks great.
What about Gina Davis from League of their Own?
Oh, yeah.
Gina Davis is looking good.
She's aging gracefully.
Dime.
How old is she?
A dime or probably a nickel at the value back then.
Let's see a picture of her.
Is she thick now?
Is she?
That's not her.
She's a thick girl.
No.
Do you have thick girls?
Do you call it that?
Oh, she was in The Fly.
Yes.
The original Fly.
Yeah.
She was in that good movie where she was like a spy.
Great actress.
What did she call it?
She's 65.
Oh, looking good.
Come on.
So 65 is not bad.
Theo.
See?
I didn't do anything
I'm ready to have
I'm ready to have
Have love at 65
No you can have love at 65
But you're saying
The chick's gonna be
Also be 65
But would you date
A 65 year old deal
If one slid in your DM's
Right now
I will say this
Okay
That's no
That's no
Let's start with
Let's start with
That's no
But go on with the rest
Of this bullshit
Gora
This dude like He did it like he had a Senate hearing.
He was like, well, like his lawyer went like this.
What I will say is.
If that's the one that said I wouldn't.
Yeah.
Well, if I killed them all.
What I will say is, first of all, in your kingdom, people are starving at 2 p.m.
while you lay there and rest, dude.
Why would they be starving?
What do you think they're doing all morning?
I give them some rice.
Huh?
I give them rice.
Theo didn't even answer the question.
Hey, bro.
Classic Theo deflection.
Let's get back to when you dated 65 or not.
I would love to meet some women that are probably i would maybe go 62 63
so 65 you're out i think 65 to i just think 45 to 65 ain't that the same
i want a woman that's still working that's my thing because 65 people retire a lot of 65 i
don't want to have somebody that's trying to get me to do
all kind of new things, but then suddenly they want
to do archery. They want to do plant
potting. They want to do...
Yeah, they're painting in the backyard
and shit. I still want to be staying active
or working.
Okay, what's happening here?
That's your lawyer? Something about busting up.
If that's my lawyer, dude,
you can lock me up in Nepal
right now.
The same prison
that Bruce Wayne went to.
Gotham in the dark night.
69 years in
Tibet over here. This dude has
some issues, bro.
Oh, you look like Bobby right there
when you did that, dude.
Yeah, dude.
You know what? Oh, you look like Bobby right there when you did that, dude. Yeah, dude. Yeah. Yeah, dude.
Yeah, you know what?
I've never seen that before, but now they look like brothers for the first time.
Yeah.
They don't normally look like they have the same dad.
Yeah, dude.
You know, they normally don't look like they have the same father.
Yeah.
I love that.
It's weird.
Do you wish y'all's dad would have been alive a little bit longer?
Yeah.
Yeah, that day was messed up man because uh you know i didn't know my brother wasn't sober so i was just like
damn and then you know it was a horrible day you know but uh yeah we i was there when he when he
when his uh his soul left did you have you have you witnessed that like a life leaving a body
oh you were like holding his hand yeah me and my mom were hysteric.
And then Bob was just kind of catatonic.
And I didn't know.
He had 17 years sober.
Well, he was huffed up on that gas.
He was on edibles.
Yeah.
So he was watching it and he was tripping out.
I didn't know that until later.
Now, did he get high?
Like he was going to go see my dad?
Well, no, no.
My mom woke up that morning and she was like yelling in Korean, you know, in hysterics.
Like what?
Let's hear some of it.
Oh, mom, oh, mom, oh, papa, oh, you know, oh, oh, oh, oh.
You know, like, like, and I'm just, I'm like getting up and I'm like, okay, now, and like
in my mind I was preparing, this is the time.
It's going to happen right now.
And so.
And would you put on, did you put on a certain outfit?
No, no, no.
I just, whatever we had, because we didn't know how much time we had.
Oh, yeah.
So, like, I didn't know during this time my brother had ingested, like, I don't know what he had on him.
Why did he do that?
Do you have an appropriate.
Well, do people deal with death in different ways, bro?
Yeah.
I was just curious, Theo, if you have like.
If there's a certain outfit.
Do you have like an attire in the closet where you're like, I got to get my.
I can put on a suit.
My soul outfit.
I got to get.
I'd wear something probably loose fitting
in case part of the soul gets caught in my shirt. I don't want it to
get lodged on me or
whatever. Yeah. It was intense. It was
like an outer body experience. It was a trip, dude.
Like to feel
the body get cold and everything. No way, really?
Yeah, yeah. How long were y'all's hands on the
body? Y'all ever see that thing? Hands on a
hard body? You ever seen that? I was holding his hand. Yeah, I held
his hand. Where they win that Dodge Stratus or whatever.
They keep their hand on the thing for as long as they can.
Is that Fairfactor?
It was in Mississippi a long time ago.
Hands on a Hard Body, it was called.
What channel were you watching?
Is this on TLC?
No, this is one of the best movies.
It's a documentary.
People at a shopping mall in Mississippi,
everybody tried to win a Dodge Neon.
Putting their hands on a dead body?
Whoever left it on the longest, right?
And one person, they called somebody to bring them a snicker,
and when they got there, he just took it like that,
and he lost.
You were messing around.
It was all a trick.
Was that done by the local dealership?
Yeah, I think it was.
Hands on a hard body.
Sell one car?
How do you find out about this stuff?
It's the same thing you're doing, man.
I know, but dude.
It's not the same thing, but it's like keeping your hand on something.
All right.
When's the truck?
Five-minute breaks issued every hour.
Yeah, I didn't know that a nursing home was where people went to die.
That was my problem.
You know what I'm saying?
Because I walked by the room.
I was checking out the facility. Oh, you mean like a hospice? Yeah. I didn't know. Oh, this is where people went to die. That was my problem. You know what I'm saying? Because I walked by the room. I was checking out the facility.
Oh, you mean like a hospice?
Yeah.
I didn't know, oh, this is where you die.
Because I looked in a room.
I saw this white lady with gray hair one day.
The next day, I looked in her room, and it was cleared out.
And I'm like, that's when it occurred to me.
Well, they do that a lot for people with terminal illnesses.
She died last night.
They know with terminal illnesses, and they know this is it.
They just take them to a hospice to be comfortable.
So they're doped up on if there's pain there's pain they gotta make sure they numb the pain
Nothing else they can do. Yeah, they're just like okay. Let's let people die gracefully
You know like ups like USPS for God basically or ShipStation or whatever. It's like a way
It's like it's the last Center you go through. Yeah
But yeah, have you heard of like night visions or night terror like or
you go to the ups store you gotta stand in that line what kind of packaging oh no death visions
have you heard of death visions so he was catatonic they took the feeding tube out of him
but i went to watch i was watching i went back to visit him and i brought rocky i was watching rocky
too had my notebook on me and he had his eyes closed the whole time,
but out of nowhere he went and like.
What part of the movie?
I don't know.
I don't remember.
Check your notes.
I don't have notes.
What notes were you taking?
No, I just had my notebook.
I had my notebook on me.
I don't know.
I was like writing.
Just so we can like, let's just paint a picture.
So your dad is catatonic, and you're watching Rocky II.
I was watching Rocky II in the corner of and taking notes and writing in your notebook?
No, I just had it on me.
I could have had a book on me.
Oh, God.
Yeah, whatever.
I had a little thing.
I had a backpack on me.
Out of nowhere, he just opens his eyes, and he's tripping on the ceiling.
No.
He was like, you know, and I'm like, oh.
And what did you do?
You hold his hand?
No, I go, Dad, he couldn't talk.
Did you pause the movie?
Yeah, but he didn't break
what it depends on what scene he was on dad dad pipe down it's my favorite scene
it's a great movie by the way two seconds great movie you're a rocky i'm a rocky fan
rocky one and two are the best ones How dope though
That your dad
Right when he gets to heaven
He's like
No he used to box
My dad was a boxer
In Korea dude
Is that why you watched Rocky
Yeah he was a featherweight
Yeah
Oh wow
Like in the army or something
He was a featherweight
Because y'all was eating
All them duck over there too
No we're not eating duck
We're not eating duck over there
Yeah y'all were
No we're not eating duck
Dude you bring up
95 pictures of people
Eating in Korea It's not there One of them having duck're not eating duck. Look it up. Cream's eating duck. It's not there.
One of them having duck.
I can't believe that's a duck country.
They eat the bill.
We don't eat the bills.
We don't eat any of it.
Lord, you guys.
But anyway, going back to
Deathbed Visions, yeah, he was tripping
on the ceiling.
LA's Double Duck Dinner.
Here you are.
That's not me, dude.
But that's what's her name right there.
I've had Balut.
Lucy Chower.
What's that girl then?
The comedian?
Pregnant?
Ali Wong.
Well, the one on the bottom right looks like Steve there.
That looks like Ali.
No, man.
Is that Ali Mukbang in bed?
I've had that.
That looks like Ali. You know her name? Ali Wong? That looks like Ally. Is that Ally Mukbang in bed? I've had that. That looks like Ally.
Do you know her name?
Ally Wong? That looks like her, doesn't it?
No, really.
Maybe just the glasses. Get us in the episode,
Nick.
Perthio gets canceled.
It looks freaking 78% like her.
It kind of does.
In his defense, it does. Thank you very very much I don't see it Thank you Prince
Your honor
Your honor
Yeah
Look it's about 3.30
I'm hungry
Okay
Yeah what do people
Do in his kingdom
If they're like
They're just up at 10am
They're like
Fuck
I can't even start the day
Because it's illegal
No sleep in
Enjoy life
Sleep in
Enjoy your sleep
Enjoy your sleep
Like he's the only one
A curfew is from like
Enjoy your sleep
I cherish it 10pm That's the best thing Tofew. He's only with a curfew is from like. I cherish it.
10 p.m.
That's the best thing.
There's nothing wrong with it.
Police walking around making sure people are asleep still.
I know you got more dreams in your void.
Why are you up at 11 a.m.?
That would be a great world to live in.
I'm just getting a cup of water.
What we got?
We can lighten the mood with some confessions from our deviant listeners.
There's some fun ones.
They're not that bad.
Hey, guys.
So the thing I wanted to confess was I was at a Chili's the last,
about two, three weeks ago.
And we were there.
We had some drinks, me and my girl and i said i was gonna pay
but i didn't well i kind of technically like i threw the money on the table right
and then when the waitress left we i was like oh it's all good and grabbed the cash off the table
and then we left i was like i didn't actually mean it like I wasn't actually. I'm not like a
I don't do that often.
My girl thinks I paid. She thought I was
being a good boyfriend.
And
to be fair, she did
take a long time
to come pay for the check.
So I don't know.
So he dined and dashed.
And didn't tell his girl.
So she's going to be like, hey, let's go to Chili's again.
He's going to be like, ah.
I don't even like my full rack of ribs.
And it's probably the only place to eat in their town, too.
Right.
Yeah.
That's what it sounds like.
Chili's is the spot.
That bill gets priced, though.
You get that full rack of ribs and a shake to wash it down with.
That Oreo shake with the whipped cream.
Oh, that's Applebee's i like that he
was like uh i don't do this all the time but he's like he was trying to make up for anything but she
did take forever man yeah trying to justify it uh what do you think nick about that you ever done
something like that uh dine and dish when you're in high school yeah in high school we did it as
a group one time i felt pretty i do it with my mom all the time.
Yeah, Denny's.
At Chili's, matter of fact.
Yeah, all the time.
Yeah.
My mom did it all the time.
They're going to send you a bill.
She's like, you guys stay here, and I'm going to go get the car.
And at the time, I was like, oh, this is how it goes.
Dude, my dad one time, I think, forgot to pay.
He was so old, he just forgot to pay.
And the lady came out and was like, you didn't pay.
And he's like, I did pay.
And I don't think he was dishing. No, he just didn't knowhing i just had no idea and i didn't know what to do dude i was probably maybe 27 i don't think i was 11 years old probably my grandma had to drive us
home too i remember oh really he would let me fucking drive as soon as i hit five feet
you should know better you can go go to Hogwarts at 11 years old. Bro, my grandma used to steal the knives from Outback.
Nice knives.
She had a collection of 12 of them.
I've done that.
When I was a kid, my mom was like.
Man, I got some crime families.
You know, it would be like you get the take-home bag.
Yeah.
So I put the whole tray, like this nice silver.
Yeah.
I didn't know.
I just put it in.
And when we got home i was like you stole
that you know like okay don't have a kid do your job what happens if somebody steals in your kingdom
steve well i i have to confess i did something once when i worked at a sushi restaurant to a
waitress because she she always treated me like shit what'd you do i took some of her tip
off the table it was like an eight top but
she'd always dude she was so mean to me and uh so you left her some money though yeah i left a
little bit on there but i so you had her mean potatoes i took yeah you had those people thinking
yeah but i had she i yeah i had a thing with her but that's the only time i did something
were you jealous about her no she would just stiff me or just steve table 14 you know like and was she japanese or vietnamese she's white
woman she'd like shit though so yeah that's not too bad so the tit the yeah but that poor table
oh i know now she thinks that table's a bunch of dickheads i at me my brother used to work at this
place called all season rentals and the boss treated us like shit my brother asked for a raise he was like the manager and they treated us like shit so before i quit he used to work at this place called All Season Rentals, and the boss treated us like shit. My brother asked for a raise.
He was like the manager, and they treated us like shit.
So before I quit, he used to smoke cigarettes all the time,
and he left them one day, and I stuck the cigarettes up my ass
and then took them out, and we were smoking them.
I went, man, you're smoking shit.
I got fired.
I got fired.
Like on the help almost.
Yeah, I got fired for that.
I don't know if you should be admitting.
Oh, no, he's fine. He's fine. should be admitting. Oh, no, he's fine.
He's fine.
The place is doing well.
No, he's fine.
Well, now he's going to be like, oh, you know, I got E. coli that year.
Yeah.
Definitely a pink guy.
Yeah.
So just so I'm clear, you stuck a full cigarette in your butthole.
All the way up your butt?
Multiple cigarettes, yeah.
Well, all the way up your butt.
How many cigarettes at a time?
No, that's not possible.
You have to grease them.
Without breaking it?
No.
So you have a real stiff butt.
Oh, he's got his butt whole.
What do you have, your butt made out of what, origami or something?
How do you have a tremor?
It's like a tremor.
When Brendan farts, it goes, ooh.
It's like a tremor.
How would you get a cigarette in your butt?
A few of them.
Demonstrate it.
How would you do that?
I mean, I just took them, the ends of them, and fucking just jammed it in.
That's how he got addicted to nicotine.
Boom. I do it in the mouth. The hardmed it in? That's how he got addicted to nicotine. Boom.
I do it in the mouth.
The hard way, huh? That suppository.
You'll probably come out with those soon.
You'll be selling them in a week, dude.
What else you got, Dick?
Were they shitty, though?
I mean...
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
And you just left them?
He just...
He didn't even...
What did he think?
I put them back in the packet.
You know, he's talking shit to us, and he's lighting it, and then we're all laughing.
Did you smell the sick...
Do you smell...
I mean...
Did y'all used to smell each other's bodies, you and Bobby?
No.
What the hell are you talking about?
I'm asking you a question, man.
No, no.
No body smelling.
All right, fine.
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This next guy threw his brother under the bus.
Hey, guys.
I'd like to leave an anonymous confession.
So about, I don't know, seven or eight years back, my grandfather redid this brand new bathroom.
He was all excited about it.
It took him like months to do.
And he painted the door.
It was the last thing that he did.
And when he painted the door, there was just a little paint drop that dried in the middle of the door.
So when I was taking a shit, it was this big, big navy blue door.
I peeled it off.
And under the door was white.
So there was this big white mark on the door now.
And I was like
oh shit so about 10 minutes later my grandmother comes in and she sees the big white mark on the
door she starts freaking out she's like who the fuck did this who did that and i blamed on my
little brother um and everyone believed me and everyone hated him and for the next five years
my grandmother never spoke to him.
Every time he showed up to the house, she would just say, get away from me.
I don't want to see you.
She never liked him again.
Oh, yeah.
And then she died of a heart attack.
Is that my brother calling?
I believe.
And I feel a little bad about it.
That's Gianni, and he's talking about Chris, too.
I'm going to get that off my back.
So, thanks, Gianni.
Your grandma really never talked to you?
Oh, my grandmother fucking hated me.
Makes sense.
For no reason either. Well, whoa. No, even before this. Look, beef Oh, my grandmother fucking hated me. Makes sense. For no reason either.
Well, well.
No, even before this.
Look, beef marvel, dude.
People like you.
You possibly would have done that too,
so one of y'all had to take the fall.
Well, let me put it this way.
The first time I saw her in six months,
it was Gianni, my brother's first time back in Rhode Island.
We go over to their house for dinner.
I'm 10 years old.
We knock on the door.
She gives him hugs.
She looks at me and goes,
this night isn't about you.
Do not say a word.
Do not sit at the table.
She made me eat my dinner
in the living room.
They were all having a good time
at the dinner table.
Damn.
Grandma sounds real bad.
And what was causing this?
What were you doing
that made her kind of
create some of this?
She was just a bitch.
She just didn't like me.
She always called me
and my brothers
little bastards all the time. She was just a very bitter person. Were you happy when she She always called me and my brothers little bastards all the time.
She was just a very bitter person.
Were you happy when she passed away a little bit?
I mean, I wasn't happy, but I mean, I didn't care.
But also, I didn't cry.
See, this has something more to do with she didn't not like you.
She didn't like your dad or something.
Or your mom.
She didn't like your mom or your dad.
She didn't like my mom.
There you go.
There it is.
Which was weird.
And you probably look like your mom.
It was my mom's mom, though, which is the weirdest part. And she didn't like your mom or your dad. She didn't like my mom. There you go. There it is. Which was weird. And you probably look like your mom. It was my mom's mom, though, which is the weirdest part.
She didn't like your mom?
Yeah.
But you know raccoons?
There's always something there.
No, she likes my mom's brother and my mom's sister.
She didn't like my mom because my mom was like a tomboy back in the day, like when she was a kid.
So she wasn't a girl.
Semi-les, though.
What I'm telling you is this, brother.
Raccoons.
If the man, if the woman raccoon doesn't want to have sex with the man raccoon telling you is this brother raccoons if the man if the woman raccoon doesn't
want to have sex with the man raccoon you know this the man will kill the children so that it
will make the woman go back into heat all animals what oh wow lions do the same thing yeah they do
that like if a new lion if a new lion comes in and don't feel bad is what i'm saying to you bro
yeah i don't feel bad at all
I won that because I'm here and she ain't
She also was older and died
You're also 21
She was 97 years old
I got the last laugh is all I'm saying
What did you do to her before she died?
Did you do something?
Did you go to the funeral?
Yeah
It was kind of hysterical.
But you went in sneakers?
No.
No, no.
My grandfather would have beat my ass if I did that.
Stevie, if you look at this picture, does it seem like you guys know each other at all?
No, no.
Look at his hands.
He's cute.
His hands are like.
Did you know Gianni did that?
No, I had no idea.
But right when he started talking, I knew exactly who it was.
I didn't know he was going to tell that story.
Gianni's been putting a lot of shirtless pictures of himself up recently.
Has he?
He is looking good, man.
He is feeling himself.
He's thirst trapping, dude.
Yeah.
Well, I think you hang out.
He hangs out a ton also with the urban community.
He does.
And so I think he gets a lot of that.
He thinks he's Nelly or something.
I mean, look at this. That's's more of a Damn, he's working out
Yeah, look at this, bro
Damn
Teal, come on
Well, it's just insane
What is going on here?
Deadlift
Wait, what are you?
Is he?
You're the kind of person that's impressed, man
Is that a Tim Tebow tattoo on his chest?
Which one?
No not the rose
Oh no that's just a random EKG
And he likes to shout at me for my tattoos
How much can he bench?
Not a lot
Do you feel like
That
Gianni
That he's a decent brother
Yeah oh my god yeah Yeah he's a decent brother? Yeah.
Oh, my God, yeah.
Yeah, he's a good guy.
Him and I, we've always had each other's back, which I'm grateful for.
I'm really close with him.
He got him a job.
He did, honestly.
That's a good point.
Yeah, he really did.
You have another brother, though.
There's another one, right?
Yeah, but I'm not as close with him because the age difference is high.
Right.
It's like five years.
Gianni's definitely very
thirsty this would be like people in your community at breakfast is gianni you think so yeah real
thirsty real hungry out there dude just lifting weights and nothing to eat or drink because
they're killing time do you wake up and you have to go out on the balcony have no choice but to
fast yeah what are you gonna do when you get on the balcony well i fast i fast in real life
are you like one meal what would you say at the kingdom you go out on the balcony and do your work. I fast in real life. I eat like one meal.
What would you say at the kingdom?
You go out on the balcony, what do you say to them?
I would just say breakfast is in a few hours.
Wait, so hold up.
So you're waking up at 2 and they still got to wait until 5?
Oh, no, brunch.
They got to wait until 5 to have breakfast?
That's a brunch.
That's a brunch.
At least everybody won't be thick.
Everyone's going to be in shape.
Everybody be starving in your community, dude.
Damn.
Well, I'm sorry your grandmother treated you bad, bro.
Appreciate that.
You seem like a decent guy, and it's her loss, I'm sure.
Bro, did you see him and his brother fighting each other over a video game?
Straight up fighting.
Oh, me and Bob did that all day.
Yeah, I did too.
Yeah, dude.
FIFA, dude.
Steve almost pulled a knife on his brother.
How old were you though?
Yeah.
32.
Oh, wow.
30 to 50.
No, because we're playing Knockout Kings.
And the old one, you could do one cheat where you do a low blow, hit him in the nuts.
So we were going like he would win a round, I would win a round.
We're on the 12th round and he he did a low blow and um i i bet like i bent over and then he uppercutted me okay
and and so i just i saw red dude you got a switchblade out i got two knives and what'd you do
it was you know what i feel bad maybe no no they were sharp kitchen knives. And I was like, dude, let's go.
Like Cutco.
Remember Cutco knives?
Yeah.
Goddamn.
And how did it end?
Did you cut them?
No, because he had a...
Oh, you know, I feel bad because it was the night before his Mad TV audition.
His final audition.
Yeah.
Well, he got it.
The first time...
Yeah, he booked it.
He booked it.
So...
The first time I met Steve, we were playing FIFA.
Oh, yeah. We got competitive. I was at Bobby's place. Yeah, we played FIFA. Remember? Yeah, yeah. And that was the first time I met Steve, we were playing FIFA. Oh, yeah.
We got competitive.
I was at Bobby's place.
Yeah, we played FIFA.
Remember?
Yeah, yeah.
And that was the first time we met.
And what happened?
They were going to get into a fight.
So I'm beating Bobby, and then he's not supporting Bobby.
So they're starting to fight while I'm playing both of them.
It was great.
You guys fight a lot?
That's why we don't play games like that no more.
Really?
You guys really get into it?
Yeah.
Who would win?
When you guys fought as children, who would honestly win? Oh, he knocked the shit out of me when I was a kid it who would win when you guys fought as children who would honestly win
oh he knocked the shit out of me when I was a kid
who would win now
I don't know I wouldn't fight him
but you have to fight him
I'm in better shape
you could beat Bobby's ass right
I don't know yeah probably
probably Bob if you're out there
if it was black you could that's for sure
if you paint his ass black you could beat him did you and. That's for sure. If he painted his ass black, you could beat him, dude.
Theo, did you and your brother fight?
Yeah, we would beat each other with chairs and shit.
It got just from zero to violent.
No, but would you guys throw fit?
It was always attack with weapons.
Always attack with weapons.
Stairpost.
When you listen to rock music, right?
Oh, yeah.
I listened to a lot of ACDC.
Oh, you couldn't put on Creed without you guys fighting each other?
Yeah, I threw something and threw the window at me one time,
broke the whole window.
It was just more like-
Yeah, yeah, me and Bob too.
Construction worker type shit.
Yeah, I threw him out my parents' window, yeah.
You did?
Yeah, because he was prepping me for wrestling,
so we'd had been-
Did y'all have straw windows or was it glass?
It was glass.
Uh-huh.
And I shucked him out
and then his arm got out the window.
He pulled it back in.
Were y'all in a jungle or something?
And he goes, you want?
All right, all right all
right and then he like looked away and went boom just knocked me out yeah should we get in some
king or sting it yeah let's get into something i'm king in that though go ahead yeah yeah i would
like who do you think would win honestly brennan do a below the belt real quick on these two fellows
yeah man stevie's in better shape bob's kind of fat happy and successful so i'll on these two fellows? Yeah, man.
Stevie's in better shape.
Bob's kind of fat, happy, and successful.
So I'll think Stevie.
Stevie got that chip on his shoulder.
The little brother.
Bobby seems like he's a little cowardly.
You know what I mean?
I don't think he's had a good fight in a while since that.
Yeah, I think Stevie's down. I think Stevie's lived a little bit longer.
He's lived. He's in that hovel. you know what i mean he's like life is like
on him yeah i mean oh yeah he has all those safety rails on everything in your apartment yeah he's
ready to go very alarming when you go in somebody's bathroom there's safety rails in there it's
fucking alarming and the air conditioner that's leaning over the toilet so he's like he's got a
shit like this stevie battle he's fucking tough You know what I mean
He got shit
He got a push
He doing crunches
All right dude
You're saying too much man
You're revealing way too much man
I'm just saying
You're a tough guy
King it or sting it
Okay
King it or sting it
Hey guys
And next
Hey guys
I don't think we
Gave that last guy
King it or sting it
King it or sting it Hey Hey Did we gave that last guy a king or a sting. King it or sting it.
Protocol.
Hey, did we give that last guy a king or a sting or what?
King it or sting it.
I don't think it was only that last guy.
And next.
Wait, did we sting it?
Great segue.
We put a pull up.
All last week he's like, hey guys, I don't think.
Well, I'm sticking to protocol.
I respect the platform.
I respect the platform. Nobody else does, dude. I know I'm protocol. I respect the platform. I respect the platform.
Nobody else does, dude.
I know I'm mad.
This is your guys' time.
Yeah, nobody else does.
They put a lot of effort into this.
He's watching.
He's just at home with a notebook.
Again, Steve?
Again?
Yeah, dude.
He can't understand it.
My favorite part.
Here's your other brother.
Happy Winkle.
Brendan. Hybrid. Schwab. How's your other brother. Happy Winkle, Brendan, Hybrid, Schwab.
How's it going, guys?
I love what you guys do.
I love your podcast.
I got a cater stinging for you.
What do you guys think about lingerie league football?
You guys love those lovely lady hitters with all the double D, full impact, CTE.
Let me know what you guys think
gang gang
buzz buzz
well
also
Stevie
and Eric
he didn't include you guys
I'm sorry
I'll say that
that's fine
I
I went to a game
one time
have you ever been to a game
a lingerie football game
is this real
it's hard enough to give me
the NFL game
yeah
those are bad
I skipped a Super Bowl I skipped a Super? It's hard enough to give me the NFL game. Yeah. Those are bad.
Dude, I skipped a Super Bowl.
I skipped a Super Bowl one time.
I went down to USC to the campus. And it was, bro, the hits were insane.
Are you serious?
Well, it's real.
They really play.
They play football over the NFL right now?
It's not touch football?
The women playing this thing.
Now, there's, I think, a lot of thoughts.
There's a lot of thoughts that get in thinking it's just cute and shit.
Yeah.
And they get into it.
That's some real.
That's some chasing it. That was one big bitch.
Well, they got pads on.
I know exactly what you're saying.
Yeah, I know exactly.
We're playing for keeps.
65% of them are like, bitch, how?
You know, they want to eat.
But then there are a few bad bitches with pads on, yeah.
And they mad.
See, here's the problem, too, is the cute ones are the ones that get all the shit.
Oh, dude, they're getting into it.
They get all the love, the cute ones.
Damn.
So these other ones are like, you don't want this.
Yeah.
Holy smokes. I was shocked by how violent it was, honestly. Some love, the cute ones. Damn. So these other ones are like, you don't want this. Okay. Yeah. Holy smokes. I was shocked by how violent
it was, honestly. Some of the hits were violent.
Oh, dude. Oh, shit. You don't get those in the
other lines. Oh, no, I'm down for this. They're not talking about it.
Oh, I'm down. And they're in, like, bikinis
and shit? Oh, hell yes.
Boom. Oh, dude, you'll see a
tit just fly by you in the stands, dude.
Damn.
Stevie's like,
I'm down for it.
Brandon's like,
was it under 65?
45.
I'm not even looking.
Hey, we should all go to a game.
Is it still around?
I think it is.
Because they were on strike
because they weren't getting paid.
That'd be sick.
Yeah, because you know what?
Hell yeah. The chick that won Big Brother, because you know what? Hell yeah.
The chick that won Big Brother, because I love Big Brother,
like three seasons ago, she was on a team.
She left the team to go do Big Brother.
They weren't getting paid.
Really?
Yeah.
Big Brother's good.
This is awesome.
This is a highlight from.
Well, Peter, we circle right there.
Megan, she's been fucking up all game.
And oh, no, she blitzed.
She's supposed to stay back.
That's a touchdown.
Let's listen to the head coach who's verbally beating her.
We covered this shit over and over.
Listen, Peter, we have covered that a fucking million times.
Your job is to weak side tight end, not the fucking quarterback.
Well, fucking watch her.
That's your only responsibility.
Take it off.
Get out there.
God damn it.
Well, that is not a nice man right there.
I mean, Megan did blow the coverage.
And, oh, no, I think it's going to happen a fucking game.
No, Megan.
Touchdown.
Head coaches might explode.
Let's listen in.
Like, if you can do that as the announcer, I'm in 100%.
He's all like, what's'm in 100% He's all like
What's this bitch doing
He's like going in dude
That's not the real announcer though
That's the guy who does
Viral
Oh
You ruined it for us
But it should be man
I got
That's real quality stuff
I'm a fan
King it
I'll king it
King it
Are they making any money
No No There was one point Where they let you throw money I remember There was a point I'm a fan King it I'll king it King it Are they making any money? No
No
There was one point
Where they let you throw money
I remember there was a point
Where they let you throw money
Onto the field
Yeah
It was like a donation thing
Or something
No
They should get paid
Very strippery
Yeah
Yeah but
You know Theo was doing it like this
No they should get paid
I was doing it like this
Back to you
Back to me Theo's too fugal for that
he got strings on him
this guy's got a dope
he changed his voice
because he just doesn't want to be found
oh doesn't want to be found. Okay.
Oh!
Gang, gang, dude.
That's sick.
Train, train. King that.
Dope.
King that.
Gang, gang, buzz, buzz.
That's amazing.
God damn, that is dope work, man.
First of all, the fact that he's still...
That's cool.
...doing graffiti...
No, there's nothing wrong with it.
...in 2021.
It's a subculture, man.
This is art, bro.
It's a subculture.
Listen, listen.
They did this before, and that was the way that you could get shit seen.
There's a thing called the internet now where you could put your artwork on.
No, but that's street cred.
You need to really go out there and do that.
But that's what I'm saying.
That's why it's impressive when somebody is still doing this.
That's a loyal fan, dude.
Let's just admit, this is Tucson, Arizona.
And this is where it always is.
Dude, I went to school there for one semester.
If you lay down for five minutes, somebody will tag your ass.
You got a dick on your face.
Yeah.
And it's like some artsy dick.
You can barely see it.
It says Lance and something.
You should make that into a t-shirt.
I don't want to downplay it.
Very impressive artwork.
And also, everything that he did, everything that went into it,
because he had to do this in the middle of the day.
Avoiding cops.
Yeah, that's true.
Well, this don't look like the Amtrak station, though.
That's a poster t-shirt.
You know what I mean?
This is nicer.
That's nice, man.
Well, what we don't know
is he had his, you know,
people stop the train.
Somebody's laying out
in front of the train
while he's painting.
Yeah.
And they're trying to deal with it.
So he over there
hopped up on Deloitte
or something.
T-shirt, dude.
That's dope, man.
I say King,
you're saying it trains.
What I've never done
is I had a friend
who jumped in one of those train cars
at a place
and just rode for as long as he did.
You know what's weird?
I was thinking about the other day.
I was in Montana.
I saw a train.
I'm like, man, it'd be so cool if I'd have kids just jump in that fucking train.
Just see where it goes.
People still do that?
I like how you do it.
Go do it, man.
He always uses his kids as a reason not to do stupid shit.
Well, look, though, here's the thing that a lot of people die in trains.
I don't know if you guys know this or not.
You guys have a lot of trains in your trains. I don't know if you guys know this or not.
You guys have a lot of trains in your region. In Tibet.
History.
In Nepal.
Well, I don't know about Nepal, but you know what I'm saying.
Y'all are train people.
Do people still get around by train and shit?
I don't think so.
People still jumping in trains and shit like the old days?
See who said I think so?
It's American pastime.
Yeah, fair. So I'm just saying, yeah, trains used See who said I think so? It's the American pastime. Yeah, fair.
So I'm just saying, yeah, trains used to be, I think, real popular.
But anyway, people die in them because they get in the cars
and they close the thing, and the only way to open them
is from the outside.
People die all the time.
Can we Google those facts?
Train deaths in 2021?
Ask him.
I don't know.
It makes sense.
You guys should take a...
You guys should take a picture.
Get that picture that the guy sent and get that framed.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
Like I said, the guy put...
That was so detailed.
No, I put it on my Instagram.
Yeah.
We should definitely take pictures of that.
Gang, gang.
That's dope, man.
We'll get that printed.
Until they come to find you guys and be like,
can we get the email of the person that...
Print. yep.
Here's a guy right here.
What does it say?
A decrease railroad death and injury.
750 or 57, 220.
Down 12% for 2019, so we're beating it, guys.
Amen.
Yeah.
Still almost 8,000 people got hurt by trains, though, in 2019.
Damn.
God.
That's a lot, bro.
Oh, my God.
Would that happen in your kingdom?
What do you mean?
People getting hurt by trains or what kind of stuff?
What do you think would be the leading cause of death?
Getting rid of trains?
Probably starvation.
Wow, that's deep.
Nobody's eating in your country like damn
this guy's a criminal
what's up guys it's Cody
from uh
Glastonbury Connecticut
in the fucking
country but whatever
uh I got a king in her stinger
for you
indoor growing of you know whatever. I got a king of the stinger for you. Indoor
growing of
that fun plant.
That medicine.
That weed.
If you're going to say it, just say it.
Yeah, bro.
In California, it's legal.
That looks like that horse you rode, Brendan.
You already know.
We got to do it legit.
Gang, gang, baby.
Looks like he has a long ways to go, though.
Yeah, he just started.
Just started, but king or something.
Yeah, there you go.
Love you guys.
Check out Walter Wong over here.
Buzz, buzz.
Gang, gang.
What do you call him?
It's Walter Wong.
Breaking slow.
That thing's going to take forever, though.
That guy, yeah.
He looks – yeah, that thing that zip up, he's definitely –
it looks like a whole kit he bought online.
Yeah, it's like an Amazon package.
King it.
I mean, that's a good side hustle.
Well, I mean, I got to give it to the guys.
I mean, if he wants to smoke his own shit, yeah.
I mean, not everybody can even get to this point.
A lot of people talk about it, talk the game.
Yeah, no, he's doing it. A lot of people talk the walk, and this guy's actually walking.
I was like, you know what?
Let me get this going in my place.
Let's freaking blow some loud up in here, son.
I'm sure his mom is furious that the living room is, you know.
Compromised.
Because the smell.
He don't got his own place.
He just started.
That's why he's looking around.
Yeah, he was like.
Like growing your own shit.
Oh, he lives with his grandma
or something
and she thinks that's like a
you know
I don't know
like an air conditioner
for some people
not you bub
but some people it is
he also said he hates Connecticut
he should just move to a state
that it's legal
Kelly
he should smoke that bad
any place
Kelly yeah
I wonder if that was a front though
because he's kind of like
yeah I'm over here
that's what I'm saying
blasting Burry
yeah
you sound like a made up place yeah it didn't seem real it didn't seem like glass something it's like if someone quizzes you on a
fake id they're like what's your sign worst yeah that was the worst of your fake id you would never
look at it till right when you were walking up to the bar you're like all right 157 south chestnut
157 south chestnut may 5th may 5th 157 south chestnut and the7 South Chestnut. May 5th. May 5th. 157 South Chestnut.
And the guy's like,
oh, what's your name?
He'd be like,
fuck, I don't know.
Chestnut.
Just give me the goddamn drink.
Now Theo got to memorize
his vaccination dates.
First one was April.
Second one was...
When was the second one?
When was the second one?
December.
Yeah. They're like, you got them done in a Pep Boys?
Hey man
I didn't know Petsmart was doing vaccinations
Yeah bro, it's everywhere these days
Yeah, Petsmart man
World change and a vaccination
Brennan's like, what are you doing about Petsmart?
This guy's looking for some relationship advice.
What's going on, guys?
I got some relationship advice for you as well.
Every guy for relationship advice looks like they've been kicked out of their relationship
and they're always just in the car.
They just left.
She just kicked him out.
He's now in the car like, I got a king of the sting this year.
I got a king of the sting. I got a king of the sting yeah i got a king sting yeah i got a king sting
king of the sink guys uh sleep in your car if you figure it out yeah yeah my lady is pretty
pissed at me all right first off relationship advice is more of a proposal advice you'll get
home and i know you're married i I need some help man, so I
Made the first step I bought that diamond ring I know in my heart that I found the one I love and I'm just trying to figure out when and where to do it
Okay, first of all
Someone is recently engaged
Yeah, go ahead. You don't go out and buy a ring without her cosigning
Everything about the ring. Really?
Yes.
Oh, because they need to choose it?
Yeah, because they got to wear it. Don't fool yourself.
They choosing it.
You need to make her see.
She can go, you need to let her pick three, three or four.
I like this one, I like this one, I like this one, I like this one.
And then you pick one of those.
You surprise her with one of those.
You can't surprise her with one of those.
But you can't go out and be like, I went and got a ring.
You know, like, because she's going to be like, oh.
It's not the one I wanted. Now she's got to wanted oh my mom always yeah my mom always wore the oval one right no matter what
you get she ain't gonna like it yeah and what does that guy come up like on the all the rappers by
the car like hey let me check your oh let's see if it's real yeah she needs to get co-signed by her
her her friends too like exactly like hey look at the ring yeah they the ring. They have to co-sign it, right?
Which one do you like?
They ask their friends.
It's a big deal.
Ring is a big deal.
So did you get the ring and then hide it from her?
Or did you, how do you get it?
Once you get it, where do you keep it at?
No, my girl went, she went on her own with her friends.
And then told you I like these.
And then she's like, I like these.
And I went and met with the guy.
And the guy was like, well, here's the ones that, you know.
And I was like, which one is, you know, give me that one.
You know what I mean?
So you don't do that. No, because here's the ones that, you know, and I was like, which one is, you know, give me that one. You know what I mean?
So you don't do that.
No, because here's another thing, too. What could happen to him?
Like, could that ruin his marriage?
Yeah, what could happen to him?
Well, he don't look like, maybe his girl has an expectation that it's going to be a cheap ring anyway.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
It's not like she thinks he's not Rockefeller or something like that.
You know what I'm saying?
So she probably knows it's going to be, like, the best she can do.
But, you know what, good luck.
He's got more.
He gives us more info about his background.
Okay.
If you could give me some advice, that would be awesome, man.
I know this is the one for me.
She's been with me through a lot, man.
I've turned my life around.
I've been clean for three years.
I was a heroin addict.
I was homeless.
I went to prison for two years and came out and changed my life.
He was in prison for two years. This is the changed my life. He's in prison for two years
It's the first rocky ball. I can probably put in a long time. Yeah, he's gone the main reason
No question for me, it's a no-brainer. I know she's the one I know I love her and I know I want to marry her
Just got to figure out how to do it. You know, I mean, so
Yeah, some advice is very welcome now for the king of the
sting it this is what i was thinking i bought us tickets to go see luke combs in vegas which um
i'm looking forward to anyways but i was thinking maybe put that little diamond in my pocket and go
to the concert drop down on one knee during our favorite song, and ask her then.
Lots of people around.
Lots of stuff going on.
I don't know.
Lots of noise.
I don't know if that's the place or time.
So King of the Sting it.
I'm closing at a concert.
You not feeling it?
I'll tell you why.
It all depends on.
That's a great question.
Thank you, brother.
Congratulations on your sobriety.
I like this guy, though.
I like this dude. It all depends on if she is okay with public stuff.
And that's the kind of stuff you find.
That's what I'm saying.
You find out what kind of ring she wants.
You find out what kind of proposal she doesn't want.
My chick was very clear.
Don't do this with food.
Like, I don't want this in my champagne box.
Food.
Eric, I know you love food.
I'll be like, hey, have some fries.
Here's some entourage. And know and then like an onion ring it's like i got it on the onion ring that's what i'm saying so if she's okay with like
public displays of affection then that's a great idea if that's your favorite band
how does he bring it up to her though like how do you bring that well the song i bet it's the
luke combs song the forever song drop it's Wouldn't it be too loud in there? Don't you want an intimate setting?
It don't matter.
Once you have a ring, she's like.
Oh, she'll get the hint.
That song is very romantic.
That's a good point, actually, the beginning of a song.
Because then you got the song.
You don't have to say nothing for at least three minutes.
You got the song.
You could dance.
She's crying.
Everybody's surrounding you guys.
They're like, oh, my God.
But I don't know where he's going to be sitting.
Is it more intimate, like on the beach or something?
See what he's saying?
The beach, you can get bit by animals.
This is exactly my point.
It depends on the person.
So if she could be like that, she could say to him, hey, he should be like, if this is
like, unless this is like something like out of the blue, like if she has no idea he's
planning on asking her.
Like if they barely know each other.
Right.
Yeah.
Then like, I don't know.
But it seems to me like she's been there
through thick and thin.
She's been waiting for this.
You know,
she's like,
look,
dude,
you were a drug addict.
I stayed around.
You was in prison.
I stayed around.
You know what I'm saying?
Like,
where's my ring,
motherfucker?
You know what I mean?
She could be like that.
So I think she's going to be okay.
How did you do it?
Oh my God.
Yeah,
go ahead.
Break it down.
Break it down.
Go ahead.
No.
Yeah,
it is.
That's what I did.
Why would you do that?
It's the worst shit.
We're only two. What did Theo say earlier? He was like, you know, well, it down. Go ahead, no. Yeah, it is. That's what I did. Why would you do that? It's the worst shit. Because we're only two.
What did Theo say earlier?
He was like, you know, well, there's a lot of.
Yeah.
No, it was like.
You can deflect if you want.
No, it's just like there was so many different ways that like.
Just tell us what you did, Aaron.
Like she said, no, I don't want this, this, this, or this.
You know what I mean?
So it was like, I got to a point where I was like.
Your girl's picky.
Yeah, very picky. She high maintenance. So like I did, like we, this, this, or this. You know what I mean? So it got to a point where I was like. Your girl's picky. Yeah, very picky.
She's high maintenance.
So we just had a romantic thing at home.
Did you ever see the ones on YouTube where the guy set up the van?
Take one more hit, little fella.
And me.
Suck on that van.
You've seen that?
It's all her family and friends?
She wouldn't want that.
My girl would want that, but you would have to plan that for months.
Like all the moving pieces.
I wanted to do it at the coffee store.
Proposal from a car.
It's all you.
She came to the show.
I wanted to do it there one night, and then I didn't do it.
See, that's an Eric thing.
I know.
She told me later.
She was like, oh my God, I'm so glad you didn't do that.
That's an Eric thing.
You know what I mean?
Eric, did you get on a knee?
Were you wearing a tuxedo?
Do you have to dress up and everything?
No, I didn't dress up.
Would you wear a hat? A hat? A tap a top hat no i put on a jacket you know yeah oh a nice
coat put a coat on you might here's the thing what i do with my girl now though in a more every like
most mornings she wakes up and hands me the ring and tells me to propose to her again every morning
she cries every morning, though.
Oh, it's sentimental to her.
Yeah, I make her cry.
That's what she wants.
She's like, I just love that feeling.
And I do say something different every time, you know?
And I give it to her, you know?
And I look at her, you know?
How do you learn all this stuff?
Sometimes I tear up.
How do you learn all this?
TikTok.
She founds this shit on TikTok.
Wait, you learned it from TikTok?
Steve.
Hopefully my girl doesn't see this bro what
the fuck my girl goes like this she goes like this she goes like this she goes look at this
she goes look at this guy oh because those are examples of what she wants yes she sees on tiktok
and she goes look at this you know and i go with the oreo shake and it's all on tiktok
we're literally gonna turn into a bunch of people dancing in the street social media
ourselves in the head
It's not every morning but it's most mornings
You gotta do it without her asking
I don't even get a chance to
Because I wake up and the ring is like
The ring box is like
Wait Eric where do you go to get the ring
You go to the shopping mall
You gotta go to Zales bro
I went to Tiffany's
Cause she wanted the Tiffany's experience she wanted the Tiffany's experience.
Oh, damn.
She wanted the Tiffany's box.
How much is the ring?
I mean, you don't have to say.
You get that Zales rock and you get that Tiffany's box off the internet.
You got to tee box that Zales rock, dog.
I'm still paying for it.
It's the reason why I'm doing this podcast.
It's the only reason he keeps showing up.
You know what I mean?
I'm still paying for it.
Can I throw some numbers out there?
No, Steve.
I'm not going to tell you.
But how much is a safe amount to spend, I think, of your salary is what they say.
20K?
Is that a percentage of your salary?
30K?
They always say three months of your salary, which is absolutely absurd for most working men, I feel like.
Yeah.
It's that much money?
If you don't want the lights on in the house, then you know what I mean?
It's over $100,000. If we ain't going go go out and eat for three months, I'm down.
Brendan, help me out here.
Live in his kingdom, dog. You'll be fine.
It's expensive.
A literal Cracker Jack.
Dude, I think I would do something.
Do the broken car thing where you stop the car,
get out there.
She thinks everything's messed up.
Oh, we ran out of gas again.
Pull over on the highway?
No, no, no.
Super dangerous.
No, no, but Theo would have three black dudes
pretend to rob him.
He's like, see, I told you we can't trust him.
And then all of a sudden they turn around and go,
whoo, whoo, whoo.
Theo turns around, he's like, girl.
Everybody was kung fu fighting.
You make them beat you up
like, what's his name?
More than 100K.
Brendan?
Is she banging one of them?
No, Theo and Brendan
should spend minimum $35,000
on a ring.
You could roll like that.
If you ain't spending minimum $35,000
on a ring, you ain't shit.
Yeah, exactly. I would like't spending minimum 35 on a ring, you ain't shit. Yeah, exactly.
Just put that out there.
I would like to announce
myself as not shit.
Yeah, man, 40K.
I would like to.
Where's that T-shirt?
I ain't shit.
There's that other T-shirt.
My ring was less than 30.
I ain't shit.
With that broken car trick
and these surprises,
you say,
don't worry, baby,
I got you, you know.
Let's go.
By got you, I mean for life.
You put the ring where the jumper cables are.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Baby, check the cables.
And she just calls an Uber and leaves.
We got a quick Cats in the Wild.
Someone sent this in and said they saw Christian getting arrested.
No sound.
Damn, dude.
There he is right there, dude.
That looked like a Oompa Loompa guy.
Yeah, that dude did look questionable.
He was at the chocolate factory, like, messing around. My man, Kyle, over there, that's did look questionable. He was at the chocolate factory, like, messing around.
My man Kyle over there gots a girl now.
Yeah, buddy.
Yeah, we're working on a little Arizona thing.
Yeah.
Wait, she lives in Arizona?
Yeah, shout out, Lauren, from Arizona.
So you're doing a long-distance relationship?
Yeah, we're going to see how it works.
It's a 45-minute flight, Eric.
We can do it.
Why are you against that, man?
What's going on there?
Come on, dude.
His girl lives in Washington.
He's not with that chick anymore.
I'm just working on myself right now.
See?
You see?
I'm working on myself.
Long distance.
Come on, man.
All these beautiful women in LA, and you looking at somebody in Arizona?
He gots a keeper, though.
What's wrong with that?
She's dope.
Is she?
She's dope.
Okay.
Oh, you met her?
I mean, via Instagram.
Oh, let's see.
Can we see? I found a good cats in the wild on Nick, but I can't find the? I mean, via Instagram. Oh, let's see.
Can we see? I found a good cats in the wild on Nick, but I can't find the video to send.
Okay.
She let him drive her new Bronco.
Oh, you got your wife got a new Bronco?
No, no.
He talked about his girl from Arizona.
You bought her a car already?
No, no.
She bought a brand new Bronco, but let me drive it around town all week.
She got her Bronco before me.
What?
How old is she?
Is she 67?
Is she Martina Shevchenko?
Is she in her late 20s?
Who's your girl, bro?
She's letting you drive her car
for a little while.
But I guess that is love, man,
in some communities, you know?
Now, does she fly here?
What happened?
She hasn't flown here yet.
I just flew there
because we had some days off
because Brendan was in Montana.
Oh.
Yeah.
You going to bring her out here?
Yeah. No, no, no, no, no.
She bought her own car and let him drive it.
No, I'm saying like the next box.
Yeah, if anything, she's flying him.
She's moving him to Arizona.
Yeah, his ass moving to Arizona.
That's how that's going.
Did you ever sneak a woman into your house to make love
or anything like that, Stevie, or anybody?
Look at Kyle.
Look at Kyle and his dime.
Oh, nice, Kyle.
You look happy, man. Okay. Nice, nice, Kyle. You look happy, man.
Okay.
Nice, Kyle.
Kyle went from working in an office, 9 to 5.
You know what?
Your kids are going to have great teeth.
Look at that shit.
God damn.
Are those veneers, Kyle?
No bottom teeth.
She's a keeper right there, Kyle.
It's going to be all top teeth.
There you go, man.
Yeah, it's true.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom.
Y'all got bottom. Y'all got a bottom. Y'all got to own a piano shop, dog. Y'all have bottom teeth? What's opposite of bubble gum?
Isn't she all gums underneath there?
Damn, bro.
You got that throat sart, dog.
You got all fucking piano keys, baby.
She got big teeth.
She got like four front teeth.
Don't talk about her teeth.
She doesn't, Eric.
She looks beautiful, dude.
I know, but she's cute, man.
Eric, or Kyle, are those veneers or real shit?
No, me?
Yeah, mine are real wow
what kind of toothpaste you use there's a man crest god dog y'all are real tooth family they
don't even have that anymore man dude hey look at this you kids be born with teeth man
yeah nice well hopefully we just have dogs but yeah dude we should make up a group what if we're
like a group that comes to the rescue for people oh that is david spade dude what does he got that's hilarious brendan uh this is our last one of the evening
yo what's up king my name is jake from minnesota go gulfs uh i gotta king it or sting it for you
guys uh king under sting it uh theo brendan stevie weeby and eric griffin doing a podcast Stingit. Theo, Brendan, Stevie Weeby,
and Eric Griffin
doing a podcast regularly.
Thanks, you guys. Love the show.
Gang, gang, buzz, buzz.
I like how I got first and last.
What was his question? I missed it.
He asked him.
You're supposed to be running the kingdom, dude.
You wake up finally.
It was fast. He's asking, should this be a regular thing? kingdom, dude. You wake up finally. It was fast.
He's asking, should this be a regular thing?
Yeah, fine.
You know what this reminds me of? It could be like that thing
where the people put their hands in
and it's the four things, you know?
Like Captain Planet?
Or like Power Rangers?
It's like nicotine.
Apartheid.
Black butt.
Sexual deviancy. Black butt.
Sexual deviancy.
And then Eric's like, wisdom.
Common sense.
Wisdom.
Experience.
If Theo was a one to two and he'd be like, form of a crack pipe.
What would our things be, dude?
Cocaine.
Nicotine.
Experience.
Rice.
Who's rice?
That's all they have in this kingdom.
That was him trying to be PC.
That was him trying to be like, I'm not racist.
I don't see color.
Who's Rice?
Who would Rice be here?
The white guys maybe?
You guys could just wipe Rice.
My bad.
Nick's trying to save me.
See, this is Steve's right before he goes red zone look.
No, I'm not mad.
I love it.
Make sure Steve you don't have any knives.
I love my Rice.
No, there's no shame.
Maybe Rice wouldn't be it.
It would be like cocaine.
What would yours be, Brendan?
Nicotine or coffee.
Okay.
Cocaine.
Okay.
Cocaine.
Nicotine.
Bourbon.
Yeah.
Cocaine.
Nicotine.
Tiffany's.
Rice.
Black butt.
Black butt.
Rice.
Black butt and rice.
Black butt and rice.
I'd be oat milk.
Oat milk.
Cocaine.
Nicotine.
Oat milk.
Black button rice.
What do you get two?
Black button and rice?
You get two?
And king it.
That's not like a...
And king it.
And that's a wrap.
King it.
Time stamp that.
All right.
Big time stamping. Got it done. Sticking to protocol it. Time stamp, though. All right.
Big time stamping.
Got it done.
Sticking to protocol.
That's it, man.
Cocaine, nicotine, oat milk, protocol.
No, I think you nailed it, Steve.
Now we sting it.
All right.
That's it?
That's it, man.
I'm in San Jose this weekend.
Thursday, Friday, Saturday, San Jose Improv.
Two weeks.
San Antonio, the big boy show. Bud Light Courtyard Event show friday one show saturday wow yep um i'm gonna be starting my tour
off uh in peoria illinois at a comedy club it's the middle of america man i'm honored to be over
there do some fundraising and then we're gonna go what else is cincinnati we got still sale
chattanooga and durham kn Knoxville, Minneapolis, some other places.
You can just find it at theovon.com slash tour.
Damn, so many cities I've never heard of.
Yeah, there's some different places.
It was hard this weekend.
I was trying to work on a new material and get it just at the La Jolla Comedy Store.
That's a great place, man.
Best place.
Is it fun there?
They're so comedy trained.
It's like they know exactly what's happening
they're with you
they know when
you're working on
shit too
they're just kind
of like okay
he's working on
that
Bob started there
yeah I took a
picture of Bob
they got a young
ass picture of Bob
on the hall
Denver Comedy
Works this weekend
another great club
which one is the
one downtown
I'm downtown
I don't think the
other one's open
right now
Landmark
so I'm in downtown and then in two, I'll be at Laugh Boston.
I got a date, too.
Moon Tower Comedy Festival, September 24th.
Whoa.
Yeah.
Scissor Bros Podcast Live, baby.
Oh, beautiful, dude.
Love it, man.
Sponsored by a sex shop.
Yeah.
You guys should do circumcisions.
I like that. Somebody will let you do it. You guys should do circumcisions. That's pretty active.
I like that.
Somebody will let you do it.
Somebody who has a baby at a farm or something.
You can sell the scissors.
A farm baby.
That's their next challenge.
Circumcision baby. If you have a farm baby out there,
please send it to Scissor Brothers.
Send a note to Scissor Brothers
to let them cut their hair.
YouTube.com slash Scissor Brothers. Subscribe today. We just try to keep theor Brothers. Yeah. Send a note to Scissor Brothers to let them cut their hair. YouTube.com slash Scissor Brothers.
Subscribe today.
But I think to answer that guy too,
we just try to keep the podcast going, man.
You know, and we're grateful that.
That's why we didn't even
King of Sting that.
Well, you know what?
You never know.
Yeah.
We'll let you know.
Nicotine.
Yeah.
Cocaine.
Oat milk.
Black button rice.
No protocol. Combined to form, and what does it even form? Are we Voltron all of a sudden? cocaine oat milk black button rice no protopalm
combined to form
and what does it even form
are we Voltron
all of a sudden
yes
or what was the
Thundercats
they would make that
oh that's right
yeah Thundercats
was good
God it was good
I know
dude I watched He-Man
the other day
it does not hold up
it does
Masters of the Universe
it's almost alarming
some of those other cartoons
I know exactly
what you're saying.
They're so bad.
Yeah, it's just like, ooh, that's inappropriate.
You know, all the things that they do.
Bro, you ever watch the old Looney Tunes or Tom and Jerry?
No.
God, don't.
Yeah.
It's not good?
It's just, it's dicey.
Animaniacs is still good.
They're like, Jerry, you ain't getting hired at our company.
And you're like, what does this have to do with anything?
Yeah.
It's like, hella fucking racial. Or what's his name? Foreign uncle? You knower right or what's name for uncle you know yeah I said I said boy get over
here boy yeah you super long horn fake for a lock on dog this shit gets hella
racial well Chad it's like like Dumbo what up chin come say something real
fast yeah Dumbo was bad where you been okay no karaoke chins is Korean barbecue
editing editing Korean barbecue criminal cream. Korean gangs.
Korean gang.
The driver for the gang.
Getaway driver for gangs.
Are we done?
We're done.
Love you guys.
Yeah, man.
Love you guys.
Brendan and Theo, fighter in weight.
I got to go in and go hard in the paint.
I do not think.
I am in flow.
Black rifle coffee.
I'm ready to go.
I need a sponsor.
I am a monster. About to open up with this at my concerts flow is contagious browser outrageous thicker than girls letter
instagram famous damn hungry like i'm fresh off keto seeing red like andrew santino every song i
hit like the great bambino bernard ate the queso and the quesoritos but everything's gonna be fine
hate on me i do not mind theo looking like the type of dude that got a pack of matches in his pockets at all times.
They sliding into my DMs.
A couple of you tried but couldn't beat him.
Quit playing like Nintendo DS.
You don't want to smoke like Joey Diaz.
Meaning y'all edible.
Just got my eyebrows threaded and I'm feeling incredible.
Brennan's son hit me up.
He said it's too loud in the club.
Can you pick me up?
King and the sting.
King and the sting. King and the sting king and the sting
king and the sting bee sting rat king king and the sting king and the sting got the bees in the trap
got the cheese on a string king and the sting king and the sting king and the sting We sting right
King and the sting
King and the sting
Got the bees in a trap
Got the cheese on a string Thank you.