The Golden Hour - Episode 44: Sinaloa State Zoo

Episode Date: November 7, 2019

The guys talk opening a Zoo in Sinaloa, Fragile Quarterbacks, Asian Serial Killers, Original Planters Cheese Balls, Ford vs Chevy, Will Ferrel vs Ben Stiller, Corn Mazes, give an ...update on Paula Abdul and much more!1. Honey - https://joinhoney.com/Kats2. Postmates - promo code: KATS20193. Manscaped - https://manscaped.com/ offer code: KATS4. FIGS - https://wearfigs.com/ offer code: KATSSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Starting point is 00:00:25 Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Jack with no shirt and chain underneath, you know? You look like frickin' Nellie Olsen from Little House on the Prairie. Oh, interesting. You look like Icebox from the Giants. Yeah? You look like that. What's that movie that... Ocean's Eleven, Brad Pitt. Thanks, dude. Where are we at?
Starting point is 00:00:42 No, dude. First of all, you're the worst mind reader. Because, no, I'm not saying that. It looks like they got Martin, what's his name, who played... Oh, Martin... Vinceable. Vinceable. Who played for the fucking...
Starting point is 00:00:52 Oh, Vince Papali, dude. No, who played for the Eagles for one down. Mark Wahlberg. Rudy Rudiger, you freaking... No, it's Vince Papali, dude. Rudy played for Notre Dame. Offsides, by the way. Yep.
Starting point is 00:01:04 Rudy played for Notre Dame. Vince Papali was the the way. Yep. Rudy played for Notre Dame. Vince Papali was the walk-on from Philly. Yep, that's what I'm talking about. I look like a giant Vince Papali. Yep, that's who you look like right there. I am growing my hair out to look like him. Yeah. Mark Wahlberg is small Vince Papali.
Starting point is 00:01:18 Papali wasn't that small. Beautiful man, too, Vince Papali. How many children does he have? Does it say now? beautiful man too Vince how many children does he have does it say now someone said he had 6'2 205
Starting point is 00:01:31 didn't play any college he has to be the last guy to not play any college he resides in Cherry Hill New Jersey I've been to a a double tree or a crown plaza over there with his wife Janet and two children Gabriela and Vinny dude he lives in a crown plaza over there. With his wife Janet and two children. Gabriella and Vinny, dude. He lives in the crown plaza?
Starting point is 00:01:49 No, he lives in Cherry Hill, New Jersey. Oh, you went to Crown Plaza. I thought you were saying he lives in the crown plaza. Cherry Hill is a beautiful suburb. You almost don't even know you're there. Are you an Eagles fan? I'm more animal probably than the group, the unified team. I support union workers, though.
Starting point is 00:02:11 You like the bird. Yep. Not the team. I like the team. I just, I like Darren Sproles. That's who I like. Did you grow up a Reggie White fan? Remember him?
Starting point is 00:02:21 Yeah, Reggie White died. All the good ones die. Jerome Brown, Reggie White, Randall Cunningham. Dead, dead, dead, dead. Jim McMahon. Jim McMahon. Alive. Jim McMahon played for the Eagles.
Starting point is 00:02:35 They need the Bears and the Eagles. Jim McMahon played for the Bears and for, did he play for Atlanta? I think he finished up with the Eagles. No, he's the one who started the Dirty Bird. No. Let Mr. Steal Your Girl... Eagles, Vikings, Cardinals. Wow, I didn't know he had all those last teams he played for. Bears,
Starting point is 00:02:53 Chargers. Yeah, Chargers definitely. Holy shit, he played for every team. Wow. Literally, name a team he played for. He's a legend, bro. Is he, though? Yeah. He's been top-daring in this picture. What's going on, man? Is he, though? Yeah. He's been top-going on this picture. Yeah. No, wow.
Starting point is 00:03:06 What's going on, man? Yeah, that thing is bright, dude. You look like a— Swaggy, dude. You ready for St. Paddy's, huh? I guess. We're an Eagles game, even though they suck. Dude, I think they still have a chance.
Starting point is 00:03:17 What's their record? One and nine? Three and four. Three and four. Yeah. Three and four. You're getting real cocky because your team's undefeated. They're not undefeated. We lost once. Who? To the Rams. To the Rams. Oh. Three and four. You're getting real cocky because your team's undefeated. They're not undefeated.
Starting point is 00:03:25 We lost once. Who? To the Rams. Oh, that's right. Is that when Breezy messed up? That's when Breezy went down. Young Breezy. When frickin' what's-his-name Sam Donald hit him in the thumb.
Starting point is 00:03:36 Asshole. That's how fragile these quarterbacks are nowadays, though, dude. You know, just a thumb. You know, here a thumb, there a thumb. You guys got Bridgewater now, huh? Bridging the waters, dude And that's all he's doing, he's taking it step by step Play by play
Starting point is 00:03:52 Yep, he's basically the Paul Abdul of I take one step forward I take two steps back We come together Up, up, up, up, up Wow Remember that? No one else, huh?
Starting point is 00:04:09 You don't know what I'm talking about? Oh, wow, dude. I feel like we've been over that. Dude, Derek was... Dude, his dad was busting his mom when that song came out. Bro, that's an old deal.
Starting point is 00:04:19 Is that Paula Abdul or is that Janet Jackson? That's Paula Abdul. And that's Paula Abdul and Chester Cheetah, dude. Oh, remember Chester Cheetah? Yeah. God, he was dope. He molested another cartoon.
Starting point is 00:04:32 Didn't he have charges against him during that Me Too thing? Yeah, he did. Yeah, he peed on a few adolescents as well. Drip, drip. Yep, that Cheeto drip. Are you a puff guy or a crunchy guy? Says a lot about a person. Now, I do remember sometimes when I was good, when I was young,
Starting point is 00:04:46 my grandmother gave me a couple of them little Cheeto balls, you know? Oh, dude. So good. Keep touching me when you say that stuff. And they had a big canister of them. It only came in canisters. Like, they were nuts, dude. Right.
Starting point is 00:04:56 Here's the thing. Back in the day, they just used to come in a canister about this tall. And wide. No, no, no. Oh, mine was. My grandma had the wide. That's when you get the big circus barrels yeah this is before that this is back when military was still popular and they came in like
Starting point is 00:05:09 kind of like a almost like something you would load into a canteen yeah boom and then fucking light up cuba yeah came in with that fucking yeah like an m9000 now what's that company that made them cheese balls real early well that's that's the generic shit. That's the generic? Is that the Hot Cheeto Asteroid? No, see, you were 11. Okay, hey. Hey. Cheeto Asteroids, Kat?
Starting point is 00:05:32 I'm not trying to be a pedophile. You're too young. Kat's too. You came with the young hitter. Yeah. That's way too young. We need original cheese balls. Original cheese balls.
Starting point is 00:05:42 Original cheese balls. Now, I would get a barrel. Unbelievably bad. Yeah, that's pretty bad. I would get a barrel. Unbelievably bad. Yeah, it's pretty bad. I'd get a barrel of that. Here we go, planters. Planners. That's what I'm saying. The peanuts can, dude.
Starting point is 00:05:51 You didn't say the can. You said a big tank. Yeah, you're right. Now, planters had them cheese balls originally. Those are the original. Damn, you can still buy them. $2.29. Can you look up?
Starting point is 00:06:00 Can you wiki these if you don't mind? Now, what I like to do, I get- Dara leak my balls people say that all the time yeah sometimes that's awesome man what I like to do is get a can of those
Starting point is 00:06:10 cheese balls and wash it down with a nice Pepsi clear really yeah come home from school do that
Starting point is 00:06:15 play a little NBA jam with my brother maybe maybe get in a fight maybe set some tree on fire you guys sound like a couple like back in the day
Starting point is 00:06:24 y'all might as well just have sex with each other if y'all doing all that gay stuff can you tell us a little bit more about the original cheese puffs well it doesn't say anything about the original
Starting point is 00:06:32 I'm trying to find any history on the original I feel like you just had it for a second that was on the original like cheese puffs so you want to look up planters cheese balls
Starting point is 00:06:39 I can't believe you can still buy and those things will rot your teeth planters cheese balls. Original. Do original. History.
Starting point is 00:06:51 There you go. For God's sakes. Between the two of you, man. Fuck. Planters, Wikipedia. Right there to get them cheese balls discontinued and reintroduced. Oh, look at the fucking old school poster.
Starting point is 00:07:05 Planters was found by an Italian immigrant. Did not know that. Dude, there at the fucking old school poster. Planners was found by an Italian immigrant. Did not know that. Dude, there's a hot lady right there. Giving you them balls. Can you find the cheese balls on there, Derek? Let's see. Slow again. There you go. Discontinued.
Starting point is 00:07:19 Cheese puff. Cheese balls. Click on that hitter right there. On that link. 1936. Oh, that's Cheese Whiz. Cheetos. Cheezos. Cheese Balls. Click on that hitter right there on that link. 1936. That's Cheese Whiz, Cheetos, Cheezos, Cheez Taz, Cheez Curls. Twisties.
Starting point is 00:07:33 I'm not familiar with twisties. Oh no. Look. Common Browns. All those are Cheese Puffs. It first hit the USA in 1948. That's beautiful. Those were the days, man. Those were the days.
Starting point is 00:07:48 Get a handful of them balls. And they only had two or three types of chips. Then they had a potato chip. Ruffles had ridges, and that was the craziest thing ever. If you saw Summer Girl with those, dude, they was doing sex. It's like they're back to the future. You know what I'm saying? Ruffles in the 40s?
Starting point is 00:08:03 Dude. Not the 40s. We weren't alive in the 40s. We weren't, but you can imagine what it'd be like if you had ruffles walking down the street. Break a couple out. Dude.
Starting point is 00:08:12 No shoes, but you had a couple ruffles. Oh my God. Dude, barefoot in the street. Ruffle house, baby. Fuck a trap house. Get that ruffle house. God,
Starting point is 00:08:23 people were crazy back then. Have you ever seen potatoes like these lady you see yeah yeah you see suck these balls dude you look like definitely an irish bird just came all over you bro in that coat irish birds come yeah they do dude didn't you hear the last episode when it was urinating on that lady? Yeah, you're right, dude. You got to pay a little extra for it. But they'll do it. Oh, but dude, you have 80 cents, bro.
Starting point is 00:08:54 You know, an O'Heron will come all over you, bro. I'm not mad at that jersey, dude. It's king of the sting, man. Yeah, we could do those again. We have some pretty dope jackets like this coming out soon. Really? No, well, not this. Well, like a Farsi jacket. Farsi?
Starting point is 00:09:07 Varsity. Oh. Varsity. I thought we had a Persian crowd. I'm like, yeah, I like that. I like where you're going with that. I didn't say we're selling rugs. We're just getting specific, man.
Starting point is 00:09:18 I like eagles. I like bald eagles. I like, now my favorite bird, and a lot of people don't know it, is the. Let me guess. Ready? Yep. Pigeon. No.
Starting point is 00:09:30 Vulture. Mm-mm. Parakeet. Mm-mm. Toucan. Mm-mm. Kiwi. No.
Starting point is 00:09:37 Seagull. Ooh, I like a nice, clean seagull myself. Nope. Pelican. Same thing, kind of. No, different. It has its own name. So they named it something special because it's a special bird of God.
Starting point is 00:09:52 It is a special bird. Get information on a damn pelican if you don't mind. It's a water bird. It is a water bird as they get. Now, are you just saying? It ain't a water bird. New Orleans pelicans, bro. What a stupid name for a team. Them pecans, dog. But let's get some information on there. Those are images.icans, bro. Huh? What a stupid name for a team. Them pecans, dog. You know?
Starting point is 00:10:06 But let's get some information on there. Those are images. Unbelievable, dude. We really... We... Well, we know they... Pelican Wikipedia right here. The long beak, the large throat.
Starting point is 00:10:19 Long thought to be related to frigate... What does that say, Derek, if you don't mind? It says frigate birds. Frigate birds. Or cormorants. Also known as spoonbills. They're also known to be able to deep throat anything in the water. Dude, imagine, bro.
Starting point is 00:10:37 They used to carry messages, too, in World War II and World War III. No, World War II, probably. Yeah, probably just two, though, you know? I'm a Pelican fan. That's a big bird, huh? That's a big bird. How about Zion Williams out six to eight weeks?
Starting point is 00:10:52 He's the only thing that started all the hype. It started, dude. But also, get smaller. Like, you're too big. He could be the Greg Oden. Sadly, he could be the thick Greg Oden. No, no, no. Greg Oden, the Benjamin Button of players.
Starting point is 00:11:04 When they showed me him in high school, I'm like, that's a 47-year-old man. He had a beard, gray hairs, 401K. That's a good point. But he could be, I mean, I'm just worried, like, all that hype and stuff. They had him dunking for the children every other day in the afternoon over there in New Orleans. That's all he does is dunk for charity. Yeah. Blew out his fucking ACL, bro.
Starting point is 00:11:23 Blew out his ACL. Dunking for the kids. Yeah. Dunk for your own kids. Yeah. So who out his fucking ACL, bro. Blew out his ACL. Dunk him for the kids. Yeah. Dunk for your own kids. Yeah. So who knows what'll happen, man, but that's crazy to start your whole career six days a week.
Starting point is 00:11:30 That's extremely dangerous, huh? How many of those players bounce back? He's having straight-up surgery on his knee? I think so. Yeah, six to eight weeks, man. Yeah, that's a while, dude.
Starting point is 00:11:40 I'll tell you what, the NBA's never been better, man. There's like eight teams who might win it. You know what I'm saying? It's never been better since when we were kids. When it was like Jordan, Isaiah. Right now it's popping, dude. Is it? Now New Orleans
Starting point is 00:11:52 ain't going to do shit this year, and that's not a big deal. But in LA, you live here so you can cheer for either team. Be a fair weather fan. He's out six to eight. Yeah, I like Detroit. I like New Orleans. Yeah, he's out for ankle. Six to eight, yep. Oh, he went surgery.
Starting point is 00:12:07 Oh, fuck. Surgery. He's screwed. That boy too thick. He's like Charles Barkley. Too thick. He might be, man. Thicky. Dude, a buddy of mine just asked me about investing in a zoo, actually, in Mexico.
Starting point is 00:12:22 In Sinaloa. Have you been there? Sinaloa? Yeah. Oh, man, they don't have any issues out there. You should definitely do that. Well, some of it's beachside, I think, if you look it up. I don't know if the animals are beachside.
Starting point is 00:12:32 Sinaloa cartel would be the main issues there. That's why they need people to come in and invest. Dude, hold up. You think you're opening a zoo in Sinaloa, Mexico, and you don't think you've got the palms the cartel there bro you think you're bringing zebras and you think you don't have to grease the palms of the underworld you think you're bringing a bearded lizard past el chapo and you don't have to grease the fucking palms daddy you're out your goddamn mind, bro. Dude, look.
Starting point is 00:13:05 I don't know. A buddy of mine got a read on an animal investment down there. Dude, get a read and open it somewhere close to us, man. I'll invest if it's low. It's $4,800 to get in, bro. Can you give me any information, Derek? Luis is here.
Starting point is 00:13:22 Fucking help him out, Luis. Oh. Oh. Wow. He's racist, right? You told me you were yesterday. What are you, Luis? What are you, Luis? I'm half Salvadorian, half Guatemalan.
Starting point is 00:13:39 I fucking called it, dude. You didn't call anything. I thought it was Native American. But you kept calling Mexican. And I respected him and just kept it very planned. Oh, fuck it, dude. You didn't call it anything. I thought it was Native American. Okay. But you kept calling Mexican. I didn't ask you to call me Mexican. And I respected him and just kept it very bland. Oh, fuck you, man. You're Latino.
Starting point is 00:13:50 Yeah, Latino. Yeah. Latino, papá. Whatever, Derek. Yeah, whatever, dude. But either way, he's not even from Mexico. He knows it's a bad idea to open up petting zoo. He's from Central America, okay?
Starting point is 00:14:03 Have some respectado, bro. You don't open up a fucking petting zoo there either. You know what I'm saying? It ain't a petting zoo, you asshole. It's a sanctuary for animalists. Will you give us some information, Derek? It's apparently not safe to be there for foreigners. Very risky, and don't be out at night.
Starting point is 00:14:18 The most risky. Hey, the most risky. Americans can't go there, and you're dumbass trying to open up an all-white-people zoo. It's a daytime zoo. It's not a nighttime zoo. I'll tell you what, this seems like a fucking cover-up for sex trafficking. That's what it sounds like. What?
Starting point is 00:14:33 A nighttime zoo? A zoo? A nighttime zoo is a horrible idea, dude. That's when the animals get frisky. Dude, what do you want? Otherwise, these animals are going to be coming up here looking for homes, bro. We need to take care of these animals on their home court. Hit up Whitney Cummings.
Starting point is 00:14:47 She'll send some down. If you have a giraffe, send it over right now. The air quality's bad today. If you have a hippo, let me know. I'll bring my truck. I'll be at the corner of Highland and La Cienega in nine minutes. Drop off your dogs.
Starting point is 00:15:03 Take it all, emus and larger. That's what one of our folks said. Please no snakes. Dude, here's what I'm saying. Sinaloa, beautiful daytime. Is there any images if you click on Sinaloa? How about this first thing that pops up? Showered in a blaze of bullets.
Starting point is 00:15:18 Yeah, it's not. No, you're not opening a zoo there, dude. You fucking click on an image. They're all burning trucks. I'm sorry. Yeah, they have the worst. They're all burning trucks yeah they have the worst it's they're all the trucks hey you know you should do open open a fucking petting zoo in syria right now dude like this isn't the spot homeboy they're all just burnt i do want to open
Starting point is 00:15:39 up actually a uh a company like a cling wrap company in Syria called Syrian Wrap. Do you think people would buy it? No, dude. Whatever, dude. Well, listen to this, man. Animals deserve love everywhere, and I think... Do it, man. Dude, it's $4,800. You know?
Starting point is 00:15:56 And I know it's expensive, but to know that animals are doing well there and... How about they're in one of the whole cities on fire? Which one are you eyeballing? Right there in the middle. Oh, that's where they're looking for people. Down, down, down. That one. Oh, that's just a bunch of dead bodies.
Starting point is 00:16:11 That's a bunch of dead bodies that were put in the river. Yeah, that's tough. Oh, that's Sonoma, one of Mexico's most violent states. But you know what makes people relax and calm down? Guinea pigs. Si, animales. Animales. Oh, look at the sheep, huh?
Starting point is 00:16:24 Put your guns away, man. Forget the drugs today, Holmes. Yeah. I like lambs. It's Theo Von's camo over here, bro. Yeah, bro. Oh, look, the Rat King have a fucking porcupine up here. Porcupine.
Starting point is 00:16:38 That'd be awesome, man. Well, look, man. Sorry I want to invest in Mexico, dude. This is how it happens. People want to invest in Mexico, they get turned down by a guy who's wearing an Eagles jacket but doesn't want to support Igales. Huh? What about the Igales, huh?
Starting point is 00:16:54 What about the Flamingo? Dude, I like my Flamingo. Hey, are there Eagles in Mexico? Mexican Eagles, look it up. Mexican Eagle. Nope Look it up. Mexican eagle. Nope. Bald eagle.
Starting point is 00:17:13 I would assume he's the America's logo because of, you can only get them here. Eagles in Mexico? Unlike anybody they've found throughout the world, the bald eagle is found only in North America. You fucking get so goddamn red, white, and blue. Northern Mexico. Only found in North America, dude. That's the Mexican eagle right there. No, hold up. It says the bald, white, and blue. Northern Mexico. Only found in North America, dude. That's the Mexican eagle right there. No, hold up.
Starting point is 00:17:31 It says the bald eagle only found in North America. Bald eagles are found throughout most of North America, from Alaska, Canada. Wow, fantastic. Nope, I didn't see that other part. There we go. Well, Luis is from Central America, dude. Yeah, dude.
Starting point is 00:17:45 You kept calling him Mexican. And then you thought he was here yesterday. Well, he led me to believe some things. Oh, hey, Central America. Believe in ghosts? We believe in spirits. Science. Science.
Starting point is 00:17:58 Espirito. Diablo. Papel. That's about all the Spanish I have. Yeah. White camera guy. Ghost. I's about all the Spanish I have. Yeah. White camera guy. Ghost. I want to believe that they're real.
Starting point is 00:18:10 Amen. Your mom and papa believe him? My mom might. Yeah, your mom does. You don't know if his mother does because he's white. Don't pick on him. All right? Everybody deserves a fucking chance, bro.
Starting point is 00:18:23 Everybody, dude. Yeah, man. So look, man. Good luck with the petting zoo in Mexico, dude. It's not bro. Everybody, dude. Yeah, man. So look, man. Good luck with the petting zoo in Mexico, dude. It's not for petting, dude. And they need better PR for Sinaloa, man. Yeah. Like I said, dude.
Starting point is 00:18:34 Too many flames in a lot of those initial images. Let's keep this thing freaking floating. Yeah, let's kick this shit up. Let's kick this shit in the dick maker. Buzz, buzz, light year. Up first, we got Matt Smith from Texarkana. Oh. This is Matt from Texarkana. All right, I got the age-old Southern debate for y'all.
Starting point is 00:18:50 Amen. Chevy or Ford? Oh, my. I'll let you do B's in a podcast. That Bishop Gunn. Gang, gang. What did he say? Chevy or Ford?
Starting point is 00:19:02 I was too busy listening to that Bishop Gunn. Chevy or Ford? Let's go through it. Trucks go with ford that f-150 is just so goddamn original you feel me i like some of their theme songs too who had the one like a rock i was proud as i could be like a rock and they got somebody just breastfeeding their daddy right there it was some white some white family unloading rocks it wasn't always dude hold up dude it was only white people in like a rock there was no black family in that dude black families like trucks man they do i love trucks however ford like a rock commercial was the whitest thing of all time let's watch a little bit of it look at the white guy in the front of the fucking boat.
Starting point is 00:19:45 America is still the land of white individuals. White woman. Oh, the Chevy. The Chevy, oh. White. Oh, look at that guy doing pull-ups. Whoa, whoa. White, missing an eye.
Starting point is 00:19:57 Oh, one-eyed guy. White, lounging. Oh! Harriet Tubman. Hold up. Hold up. Hold up. The one black person just like. She didn't know she was in the car.
Starting point is 00:20:13 No, she had no idea. Wow. First of all. That was more racist than not putting her in there. The lady is from 1892. If we go back and look. Why was she dressed like. Let's get.
Starting point is 00:20:27 But hey, she loves trucks, bro. No, she doesn't. She's stuck. Actually, that almost looks... She's stuck in there. It looks like a man. Honestly, that almost looks like a man. No, that's a female. That's a young lady. That's a young lady obviously doing some work outside with crops.
Starting point is 00:20:44 Yes. Everybody walking a tight line right now. Obviously doing some work outside with crops. Yes. Watch your P's and Q's. Everybody walking a tight line right now. But this is the commercial that I'm looking at. It's a young black lady working crops. What? You're perpetuating racism, bro. What's with the crops? It's just going to be flowers.
Starting point is 00:20:58 Crops could be anything. Like a rock, bro. Could be corn. Where are you going at with this, D? Could be corn. Could be. Like a rock. They're talking about crack cocaine, dude d could be corn could be like a rock they're talking about crack cocaine dude first of all let's go back to the one-eyed guy let's go back
Starting point is 00:21:11 to the one guy why did the guy have one eye what really people do brendan who casted this thing quentin tarantino what's going on here why is the one person have one eye that's right there okay now look at that guy tatted up hand So I got a lot of questions You might be right On Like A Rock now Guy's had a long night He woke up in the morning Only had one eye left
Starting point is 00:21:29 He's doing his best dude So I'm saying I'm gonna go maybe With Chevy trucks Yeah They kind of switch things up Because this commercial Is pretty bomb
Starting point is 00:21:37 Yeah I'm trying to think Of a Ford song What was Ford's big one The Ford is the rock now I'm Bill Ford tough Oh Bill Ford tough Yeah Bill, Bill Ford tough, yeah. Bill, would you go to Ford commercial?
Starting point is 00:21:47 But now, if we're going cars, are you not going cars? Well, he didn't say trucks. He didn't? He just said Ford or Chevy. I don't know. Let's keep it if we don't mind trucks. Of all the pickups in the market today, one carries them all. It's the leader, Ford.
Starting point is 00:22:03 Oh, this ain't their most famous commercial. I don't know if they have one. They didn't have most famous commercial. I don't know if they have one. They didn't have a hitter? I don't know if they had like a big theme song. I can't think of any Ford commercial. Oh, Alan Jackson, Ford Country. Go to that one right there. Yes, this is it, dude.
Starting point is 00:22:19 You tell me which one. Yeehaw! I love this. I'm buying a Ford right now Look at that Look at that truck Yeah they switched it up dude Let's see who's in the video There's Alan
Starting point is 00:22:39 That guy Persian That guy's Persian That guy hom Persian. Nope. That guy, homoerotic. Boom, black worker. That guy looked like he had a truck. Chevy suspect. I'm back on Ford now.
Starting point is 00:22:56 I'll go Ford, man. I'm going Ford. Locker rock. Dude, hit me one more time with it. For as long as I could be. Locker rock. Now me one more time with it. For as long as I could be. Like a rock. Now let me hit you with. I've been drinking tea.
Starting point is 00:23:12 Like a rock. Okay. Well, I'm kind of into it. But now remember Ford hit you with the, he's gone country. Look at him. That's so country. You know who loves country is Chen Chen I'm not just talking about The United States
Starting point is 00:23:27 I know he does Garth Brooks Garth Brooks I'm going Ford Alan Jackson I'm going to go with Chevy Let's see what they picked 51% Chevy
Starting point is 00:23:36 Woo Bang Bang brother Tight race Know your freaking audience You fucking goon Thank you for bringing that in Young man
Starting point is 00:23:44 Dude great fucking question. Up next, this is Kirby Sloan from Toronto. Got that Rat King hitter on. What up, Brendan? What up, Theo? It's Kirby from Toronto. Got a debate club for you guys. What do you guys prefer, comedy or horror movies?
Starting point is 00:23:59 Let me know. Big Wang, pubs, pubs. Big Wang, pubs, dubs. Big Wang, pubs, dubs. I'm a horror fan. I live for horror movies. I love all of them. All of them. Do you get scared in the movies?
Starting point is 00:24:13 I like the old school horror movies. We talked about it before, Jason and Freddy and stuff like that. Nah, fuck those. But like, what else? Comedy movies. Well, if you go through horror, like right now, horror's popping. Horror movies are huge, man. Did you see the one that
Starting point is 00:24:27 kind of kicked it off? Remember Blair Witch Project? Oh, yeah. Yeah, it was 20 years ago. I know. I'm just saying that kind of kicked everything off. Now you got The Conjurings. I'm talking about real horror movies. Is it real horror movies? That's a porno. Real. I'm talking about growing up around
Starting point is 00:24:43 diabetes, dude. I don't need horror movies, dude. I go outside and have to fight off animals, fight off fucking rare owls with fucking diseases in their beaks. Okay, Brendan? Out here living your frickin' Privileged life watching horror movies? Yeah, watching horror movies inside, dude. Meanwhile, I'm outside and they got a snake, boy. And they got different things that'll get you, you fucking. That's that movieonda with j-lo no dude that's a horror movie that's outside that's
Starting point is 00:25:09 tuesday morning her ass is a die for you're running to school and one of your friends gets fucking attacked by a fucking gator you don't know shit boy man you don't know shit boy i'm a horror fan uh yeah, sounds like it, dude. Yeah, one of your favorite horror movies is probably Transformers. I'm going to vote off. I'm saying comedy movies, I guess, dude. I'm going horror.
Starting point is 00:25:34 This topic's too big. It's too big. Bring a small topic, dude. I appreciate your support, but bring a small topic. What's the fan say? 85% comedy. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:44 Jeez. You don't bring a big topic to a small topic. You don't bring a big. What's the fan say? 85% comedy. Yeah. Jeez. You don't bring a big topic to a small topic fight. This is Matt Banks from St. Louis. Matt Banks from St. Louis. Video's a little. Great shirt, bro. Yo, Theo. Brennan.
Starting point is 00:25:56 Yeah. Got a new debate club question for you this week. Oh, he's the MTV guy. So I was watching the movie Zoolander last weekend. I couldn't help but think to myself, which of these two actors have the better collection of films? Will Ferrell or Ben Stiller? We're talking old school
Starting point is 00:26:12 versus Meet the Parents, Anchorman versus Tropic Thunder, Steady Brothers versus Dodgeball. This is just what I say, dude. Gang, gang, cuz, cuz. Cuz, cuz, baby. And that seemed like one of the new age horror films kind of the way that they had yeah that looked like blear witch 2 look pretty uh dope if you ask me uh what's he
Starting point is 00:26:31 asking well he's an outdoorsman you can see he's got a bike in the back his bike helmet also also indoors man because a bunch of comic stuff in the back you know okay will ferrell or ben stiller movies who you got let's go through a couple ben stiller meet the parents something about mary tropic thunder cable man directed and wrote uh bronze uh oh uh dodgeball oh ben Zoolander Night at that what else oh you know
Starting point is 00:27:12 Trey Anastasio biopic no what else he's in not a long came Pauly yeah Heartbreak Kid
Starting point is 00:27:19 and he's in a long came Pauly oh dude now you go through Will Ferrell guys last movies were bummers. Yeah, a lot of freaking bombs, dude. Step Brothers was good.
Starting point is 00:27:30 I would go with Ben Stiller, man, for me. Like, mass, like, overall. Look at Ben Stiller's career compared to Will Ferrell's. Will Ferrell had, like, Step Brothers hit her. Anchorman. SNL he had. All of SNL. Well, Ben Stiller's show on Comedy Central was huge.
Starting point is 00:27:44 But you can't just SNL. That's not a show on Comedy Central is huge. But you can't just SNL. That's not a show. We're just talking about movies. I think for somebody... Body of Work for movies? Yeah. What does Will Ferrell do? Like, okay, Anchorman.
Starting point is 00:27:55 That President movie. Wedding Crashers. The Campaign. Step Brothers. Talladega Nights. Talladega Nights. I think that's just pretty good. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:05 Zoolander. Ben Stiller's in that too, though. He's the main guy. So that's a wash. Theyadega Nights. Talladega Nights. I think that was pretty good. Oh, yeah. Zoolander. Ben Stiller's in that, too, though. He's the main guy. So that's a wash. They're both in that. That dating movie where Ben Stiller gets all sweaty that time at the dance bar. That's good. I'm going to go with Ben Stiller.
Starting point is 00:28:15 I know. That's something about Mary. Ben Stiller all day. People are going to say Will Ferrell, but... 84% Will Ferrell. Yeah. That's like, oh, Will Ferrell. All right.
Starting point is 00:28:23 That's something. That's easy. It's like... And that's a perfect's the, that's like, oh, Will Ferrell, oh, oh, oh. Right, that's something. That's easy. It's like, that's so stupid. And that's a perfect example of how something's wrong with us. I agree. Because you put those two
Starting point is 00:28:30 and you really think it out, I do think it's Ben Stiller. You get the body of work. Now, who do I think is probably funnier? I think it's Will Ferrell. But who do I think's had a better, probably,
Starting point is 00:28:38 career overall? Decent movies where I've actually like watched it and been like, oh, this is pretty, this is good. Here's the other thing. Ben Stiller,
Starting point is 00:28:44 Escape of Danimera, the, on Showtime good. Here's the other thing. Ben Stiller, Escape of Danimera on Showtime. He won an Emmy for it. Is it any good? I haven't seen it. It's amazing. Is it really? It's so dope. Yeah. All right, man. Let's just... You think Will Ferrell over there? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:59 Even though we just list out all those movies. He's Ron Burgundy, bro. You're saying one movie? It's the movie. Oh, interesting. I forgot about that. To me, growing up with something about Mary was more important than Anchorman. Something about Mary was, I mean, that's the movie.
Starting point is 00:29:19 They should do something about the Marines, and it's like all sneaky stories about something that happened with different men in there. Oh, that'd be cool. And Will Ferrell's in it. And Ben Stiller. Yeah, there's something about the Marines. See, because Ben Stiller's never had a movie like that Sherlock Watson movie,
Starting point is 00:29:32 which was just a fucking encyclopedia brown. That was a serious movie, though. Yeah. Not a comedy. That movie, Ben Stiller's never had a miss with comedy. I mean, if you looked at it, Zoolander 2 was definitely a huge miss.
Starting point is 00:29:46 Yep. And Joe Dirt 2 wasn't that great, even though if you say it to David Spade, he does not like it. He doesn't agree. He does not want to hear that. They should have left it alone, should they?
Starting point is 00:29:57 Directly. Why they wouldn't have you and Joe Dirt, I have no idea. I don't know. Joe Dirt 6, dude. You know what I'm saying? Heaven versus hell. Tim Dirt. You're in it, dude. Yeah. Forget know. Dirt, dirt, six, dude. You know what I'm saying? Heaven versus hell. Tim Dirt.
Starting point is 00:30:07 You're in it, dude. Yeah. Forget Joe. Joe's over. Yeah. His stepbrother Tim. Timmy Dirt. Or Damp Dirt.
Starting point is 00:30:13 Dirt, Damp Dirt. Dry Dirt. Yeah, Dry Dirt. Dry Dirt. What else we got? We got a little Flama, boys. Oh, yeah. Finally.
Starting point is 00:30:21 34% welfare. Get some thoughts in here. Up first, Aunt Sherry. Get some thoughts up in here. Up first, Sherry. God damn, Sherry? Boats and hoes. Boats and hoes. Every time I come, I produce a court. And where's she from, Louisiana? She and Sherry
Starting point is 00:30:38 is from the East Coast. She didn't say what city, just the East Coast. Oh, North Carolina. Never mind, we do that. Hell yeah. Tar heels. She's 46, a mom of mama three and a hairdresser yeah she'd do my hair i'd curl her hair with my with my desires my god i'll curl her she owns that boat or that's a released boat i assume she owns that. I'm assuming, yeah. Or her man does. Yeah, she is all. She's all natural too, huh? Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:08 You think? Those tits look real, real unique. In the middle, they don't. On the right, they look like maybe. In the middle, younger pick on the right looks like maybe. Got some floats done. You feel me? Yeah, a little float.
Starting point is 00:31:24 A little air floats. I'm not mad at this mom at all. That's a southern bell that is a tar heel that's that carolina barbecue sauce you feel me full rack of ribs hard titty too fuck yeah i'll lather that up with that carolina mustard barbecue you like that hard titty you like that hard titty mm-hmm you like that hard titty boy shout out to this mom you like that fucking cement tita that fucking cement tita Luis you motherfuckers shout out this mom dude man it's about time we got that hard titty on that drywall titty no I'm joking man man. Beautiful lady. What's her name?
Starting point is 00:32:05 Sherry. Aunt Sherry. That was Aunt Sherry. Yeah, Aunt Sherry. She has three children. She's obviously mothering out there. So I'll tell you what's in them titties. Milk, brother, because she's been out there taking care of some little ones, looking fine on that boat.
Starting point is 00:32:16 A long time ago. Dude, I'd go home with that lady just to freaking sneak out in the middle of the night and go sit in that boat and have a cigarette. Yeah, I'd like to talk to you about some brisket, some Carolina tit barbecue. God, hang around. Damn, bro. Put some meat on your grill. Chapel Hill, baby.
Starting point is 00:32:33 I'm all over it. That's wifey, son. No, she seemed like a great woman. Yeah, she does. Up next, this is Aunt Harriet. Please don't. Aunt Harriet. Amen.
Starting point is 00:32:43 Is this for Halloween or? I don't know. She's from Central Texas. That's all we know about her Amen. Is this for Halloween or? I don't know. She's from Central Texas. That's all we know about her. This is not for Halloween, bro. This is Central Texas, man. They just dress like that there. Huh? No, she is a service woman. It's Aunt Harriet, dude. She'd be the oldest service woman
Starting point is 00:32:58 in the world and probably not protecting our borders very well. Semper female, bro. She's getting it done, bro. Semper female. Can you zoom in? Is there anything on those badges? Something's going on here. Did they leave anything else? Let's see.
Starting point is 00:33:11 Is she protecting a red robin? What's going on? Oh, my God. She does kind of have that G.I. Georgette look. No one else is in gear either. No. Everyone else is in gear either. No. Everyone else is at the beach enjoying life. This bitch is out there protecting the fucking Popsicle stand.
Starting point is 00:33:32 Oh, you're crazy, bro. She definitely seems like the angriest person where you pick up your kids after school. Yeah, she does. The most serious fucking... Carpool duty. She seems like the most serious carpool duty worker um let's get a woman's take cat do you feel like this woman is a service woman which is also a very strong possibility or do you think she's playing dress up i don't know something about this looks off but the look in her eyes make me feel like she's done some shit. Oh, she's not fucking around
Starting point is 00:34:06 right now. She might just beat your ass at a Red Robin though. She has the right camo in though, you know? Like she blends into that sand. You see, look at the lower half where'd she go? Boom. Sand. Camo. Camo
Starting point is 00:34:24 sand. Sand camo. Now who's's behind her i want to see some of these people that are behind her there's a woman looking at a jacket now there's another military hat back behind her is she in like the reserves and there's another military person even further back behind them if you look right there that guy looks like he's running because he left his gun well whatever he's doing yeah she picked it up something's going on maybe it's like a hey come out and spend a day with the troops and she like got all dressed up or her child could be serving and she's out there doing that deal you know i think look barb what's her name harriet harriet not buying that bro you gotta have a gun to defend that name against people too yeah you do people come out of harriet everybody thinks harriet wants to fight harriet tiffany i'll tell you why i'm not stepping on harriet's lawn she looks pissed dude oh she'll mow your ass bro
Starting point is 00:35:17 trim your nuts yeah with that gun she'll dig a hole inside of your freaking chest with that fucking nade, bro. She's got two nades on her belt. Does she have two nades on there? Probably. Why are her gloves so big? The gloves do look a little garb. She's an actress from Starship Troopers.
Starting point is 00:35:38 Old movie reference. Derek, beam me out of here, man. Beam me out of this one good luck to this lady defending our freedom good luck Harriet thank you yeah good luck Harriet
Starting point is 00:35:47 defending a she might be at like a civil war she might be defending a Lane Bryant somewhere too dude or a what's a
Starting point is 00:35:53 woman's clothing store Madewell or something oh she might be protecting a forever 21 yeah but an adult woman not someone no she wants to be
Starting point is 00:36:01 21 forever oh and she's pissed I could see that but they don't have clothes for her what What else you got? This is our last one. This is Aunt Violet. We started out great, and then
Starting point is 00:36:10 we got fucking... Aunt Violet from the Giant Eagle. And I got a BJ back behind him when I'm... What's a Giant Eagle? It's ironically, you should know it, it's a grocery store with your Eagles jacket on. It's a grocery store in the South? Dude, this is a Danger Species episode right here, bro. I might invest i might invest in that zoo yeah oh it is giving me some signs
Starting point is 00:36:29 aunt harriet the black girl in the chevy commercial this lady the first you want signs giant eagle the eagles jacket you're right you know what's going on with this aunt she's a single and she no longer works at giant Eagle. Yeah, she's single. She's trying to see what's up, boys. No longer. I'm assuming she's hauling it. Theo? I like her haircut.
Starting point is 00:36:52 Her haircut looks a little bit haunted. You know? She looks a little bit like a Farley brother. And it is Halloween, so... You think she looks like a Farley brother? Damn, dude. You don't think so? Uh-uh. I think she looks like a pretty lady, man.
Starting point is 00:37:04 You can tell that she takes care of herself. I'm just saying, you don't think she looks like Will Farley? No. No, no, no. I'm talking about Chris Farley. Oh, Chris Farley.
Starting point is 00:37:21 I don't know, man. Kat, what do you think? Similar. I don't know man Kat what do you think similar they look like they could be related I don't know if I would say that she looks like a sister a sister she's a nice lady
Starting point is 00:37:41 Ben Stiller was in there something about Mary too I've said that three times now but do you say it out loud or just in your head out loud remember I said that was what did it for me something about Mary oh I didn't hear that Will Ferrell can't compete with Ben
Starting point is 00:37:58 if we were going to go back to that Will Ferrell can't compete with Ben Stiller it should be Jim Carrey Ben Stiller if you look at longevity of careers or Adam Sandler Will Ferrell doesn't have a long list of movies, not compared to those two guys. They've been doing it way longer,
Starting point is 00:38:10 dude. Who is the black Will Ferrell? Do you have any insight on that, Derek? And who's the Asian Will Ferrell? I want to know. Asian Will Ferrell, Jackie Chan. What? Black Will Ferrell, probably either
Starting point is 00:38:24 a Martin Lawrence or somebody who had a run like Jamie Foxx like in comedy before Jamie started doing dramas just like a long runner like that
Starting point is 00:38:32 and who do you think is the Asian Ben Stiller the Asian Will Ferrell if there is one I'm just trying to think you know
Starting point is 00:38:41 people we know that we you know that stuff I don't know about I don't know I think the don't know. I think the only Asian person that can even compete in terms of their film career is going to be Jackie Chan.
Starting point is 00:38:51 But I don't know if he would be either of the two. What about the guy that they have that's in The Hangover too? Funny comedian. Ken Jeong, right? Yeah. Do people think of him as that funny? Vince Vaughn? No, this guy is, I think he looks Asian to me. Oh, Owen Wilson. Ken Jeong. Oh, Ken Jeong, right? Yeah. Do people think of him as that funny? Vince Vaughn? No, this guy is, I think he looks Asian to me. Oh, Owen Wilson.
Starting point is 00:39:07 Ken Jeong. Oh, Ken Jeong. Yeah, the one who showed his dick. Yeah. Elf? Ooh, Elf. You start going down the list, man. They get fast.
Starting point is 00:39:17 But you're ripping off the list there. You know, like his heyday. Okay, let's get into it. What are we asking him? What does she want? Relationship advice? Cut your hair. Yeah, cut her hair. Just, there. You know, like his heyday. Okay, let's get into it. What are we asking him? What did she want? Relationship advice? Cut your hair. Yeah, cut her hair.
Starting point is 00:39:28 Uh-uh, just, hey. What else you got? I'll see you out back at the GE, darling. You got a little, you had relations by the GE? I'll see you at that Sinaloa and Zoo, my love,
Starting point is 00:39:36 you know? My love. I'll see you back there in the freezer section, you know? I'm gonna get polar bear and you can frickin' frisk me. Let's go up next boys
Starting point is 00:39:48 we have a little wed better dead this is wed better dead we haven't done this in forever hey Brendan hey Theo it's Deanna from Rhode Island
Starting point is 00:39:55 I have a wed better dead for you wrestling style Chyna Miss Elizabeth or Stephanie McMahon so let me know what you guys think gang gang
Starting point is 00:40:04 buzz buzz love the podcast Brendan get your ass to New England cause you never come to our area Miss Elizabeth, or Stephanie McMahon. So let me know what you guys think. Gang, gang, buzz, buzz. Love the podcast. Brendan, get your ass to New England because you never come to our area and we would love to have you. Love you guys. Don't touch me,
Starting point is 00:40:14 but keep touching me. Touching. What? Okay. Have you been to New England? You seem like a nice girl. Have you been to New England? Thank you.
Starting point is 00:40:22 I have been to New England, Brendan. Oh, well, I'm not even trying to be shitty here, but dead would be Chyna, right? Because already dead. I hate to be shitty about it. She's already dead, so that's kind of... Now we're down to two. Stephanie McMahon, for God's sakes.
Starting point is 00:40:38 Her daddy runs the company. Heavy on the man. Legit billionaire. I would go, yeah. Yeah, I agree. Lose the attitude, you know? Chyna also did pornography, so she might be doing,
Starting point is 00:40:50 you might want to bed her, really. Again, she passed, you know? Yeah, but we're talking about living, probably. Oh, if she were alive? Yeah. It's a tough one to get by. Definitely not Chyna, because I'm not into dudes.
Starting point is 00:41:04 So there's that. Okay. That's kind of the big one. Here's that meaty exterior. Yeah, you think? She probably wears a Ralph Lauren polo. Remember when you stopped doing steroids? She doubled down for life.
Starting point is 00:41:17 Yeah, dude. She's got those army legs. God. I would go probably Miss Elizabeth for sex. That's the best picture we got? She was from the 80s? She was from the 80s. I've never heard of her. She was one of the promoter
Starting point is 00:41:33 kind of girls. She would be an announcer. She was like a cheerleader? She was with Randy McMahon, wasn't she too? With the guy with the mouth of the south? Were they together? He lived her up. I'm definitely going with Stephanie McMahon. That's what she was with. Were they together? He lived her up. Oh, I'm definitely going Stephen McMahon. Okay.
Starting point is 00:41:47 I would probably marry Stephen McMahon. I'd do love with Elizabeth, and I would probably see Chyna at the funeral parlor. And I would be there for the funeral. I'd get there early. Yeah, I'd go early. Check it out. Who are you? Listen, I'm just marrying fucking Stephen McMahon.
Starting point is 00:42:05 The other two could die, I think. Well, you have to pick, Brendan, because that's the thing. Okay, I'm marrying Stephen McMahon. I'm in sex with the 80s chick in the middle and then killing the dude on the right. That's hilarious, bro. What else you got? We got some relationship advice.
Starting point is 00:42:23 God, you just be helping me myself man you what i'm okay you have to pee yourself nope i think so you have to pee yourself all right what do we got man all right we got devin haley devin ailing haley from raleigh north carolina okay let's see what this young fella's into not him what's up fellas it's your boy devin from raleigh north North Carolina here. Gang, bro. I need some relationship advice. So I've been talking to this girl for just a little bit, and she seems great. She's a great personality, can hold a conversation, which is very nice.
Starting point is 00:42:54 Seems that we have a lot of things in common. But we just started talking, and basically she seems to be very busy. She's taking a lot of classes for grad school as well as working a lot and on the weekends as well, sometimes from 8 to 8 on Saturday and Sunday. Oh,'s taking a lot of classes for grad school as well as working a lot and on the weekends as well sometimes from eight to eight on saturday and sunday that's a lot i get the busy schedule because i'm i'm working myself as well as taking classes so it's not easy but i'm just wondering if having these thoughts already so early and a talking stage is even worth considering dating um her at all so i just need some help from you guys whether
Starting point is 00:43:27 i should keep pursuing or if i should just move on love you guys love everything you do slang gang bust nut i wasn't expecting that this young man seems like a real upright citizen you know i like this guy uh this is a legit advice question um here's the thing i i always need more details when it comes to this dude to help them out because how old is she because when i was in college there's no class on saturday sunday so she ate to eight amen you know what i'm saying that's tough to buy brother but a lot of women these days you know they get they you know this is a feminism time, dudes. You got women going back to school, women doing log cutting. You got women doing Navy SEALs all of a sudden.
Starting point is 00:44:13 Yeah, making cocaine. It's getting different, dude. Women are climbing up. You'll see a woman, open your window. Somebody's climbing by. Like, oh, where's she going? She's washing your window. Angry. Used to be just dudes know? Like, oh, where's she going, you know? She's washing your window. Angry.
Starting point is 00:44:26 Used to be just dudes. Well, yeah, it was just more risky. Now these women are being more risk takers and it takes more time out of their day, Brendan. Yeah, you're right. And so what I'm saying is that I just say to her, hey, babe, you know, you seem like a nice, cool lady. Let's, if you, I'd like to take you out.
Starting point is 00:44:43 If you're free, you let me know because you seem busy that's what i'd say yeah i would say what window are you open if you're working monday through sunday i'm not buying it girl then no one's that busy no one's that busy well let's ask kat because she's a female and she went to usc i mean it does seem a little weird because i don't know anybody who has classes on saturday for that long unless you have something very specific. I used to have those days at certain parts of my semester, but that's because I'm a theater student. I had to be there. I don't know if she's actually that busy.
Starting point is 00:45:18 Well, she might have a learning disability. disability on the same scope i think that if she's actively trying to make up um not make up credits make up for uh like missed out dates then she clearly wants to spend time with him if you're that busy and you continuously try to go see him then i think now you might have the next freaking uh kylie jenner on your hands she's gonna be a billionaire pretty soon she might be hustling to make that bank so you guys can ride off in the sunset and make a bunch of babies, dude. Yeah, so I need more facts if I'm going to solve this case. He seemed like a nice guy, this guy. Real nice.
Starting point is 00:45:55 Patrick, is that his name? His name was Devin. Close, though. Doesn't look like a Devin. No. Looks like a Brad. Yeah, he does. Yeah, Brad or an Angel.
Starting point is 00:46:04 Colin. Or an Angel. No. Looks like a Brad. Yeah, he does. Yeah, Brad or an Angel. Well, good luck, dude. Good luck, dude. You can always come down to the zoo and work with me. We'll find some animals and make some time for you. I'll see you by the... I want in on the zoo now, though, dude. I'll see you by the Tigris.
Starting point is 00:46:23 That's tigers, boy. One more guy. The Chinchillas. You can fucking babysit the one eagle we're going to have down there. Fuck yeah. Let me just take care of that massive eagle. We got one more relationship, guys. This is Adam from Charlotte, North Carolina.
Starting point is 00:46:38 This is Adam coming for relationship advice. I've met Adam, actually. What's up, Theo and Brendan? This is Adam coming from charlotte north carolina got some relationship advice north carolina ask um recently been talking to this girl that got out of a serious relationship and uh she come up she comes over a, and she cries a lot. Yep. And I've been trying to console her and try to make her feel better about the situation. Is her name Theo? She's also got family issues going on.
Starting point is 00:47:13 Just a lot going on. Party hard, Brendan. Who fucking cries a lot because he's on fucking special medication for his illnesses. Wait it out. No, I'm kidding, bro. Or keep trying to comfort her. But I kind of feel like a bitch doing that. yeah i don't know if that's the right move i can relate to that dude let me know what you guys start a podcast bro that's all i can tell you or keep doing what i'm doing and
Starting point is 00:47:36 you know i don't know if it's working so let me know what you guys think gang bang bus nuts another bus nuts and gang bang, dude. Shout out to this dude. If she's constantly crying, you got a real Debbie Downer on your hands. You can't be that excited to see if she's constantly crying. To me, when girls cry, it's kind of sexy, kind of a turn on. I don't know what that is. Probably something in my childhood I need to figure out, talk to a therapist about.
Starting point is 00:48:03 But maybe I'll talk to this guy about it. But if she's constantly crying, things ain't going well, man. Well, salt water can give you an erection, dude. I grew up around a lot of brackish flow myself, brother. That nice salt water crock get me hard. Yeah, when she's crying at the house and he's trying to make the relationship stronger.
Starting point is 00:48:20 She won't stop crying. She just got out of a relationship and now she won't, every time she hangs out with him, she just cries the whole time. Yeah, then at this point, it sounds like you're just kind of going to be a buddy, you know, like for the real deal, for the stuff. I think at this point, maybe you get a nice outfit, you know, do something nice for yourself,
Starting point is 00:48:43 buy yourself a nice hat, buy yourself a nice hat buy yourself a nice shirt pair of j's uh no brendan buy yourself a cat you know um cuff cummerbunds get out there and look fresh do something else bro you'd be supportive of her but you can't be her um you know yeah you're not a therapist dude don't be her punching a punching bag, you know what I'm saying? don't be the Kleenex, bucko. Yeah, fuck,
Starting point is 00:49:11 man. Yeah, man. Fucking tired, Good luck, dude. But dude, I love you,
Starting point is 00:49:15 man, and, listen, God loves you, too. If the crybaby don't work out, you'll find somebody else. Yeah, and it's nice that you're willing to be there for her for a while.
Starting point is 00:49:24 Yeah, you're a nice guy, man. But just don't be there forever dude you got shit to do too no one likes to cry baby you got to live your life yep get her some dunkaroos tell her to shut the fuck up what else you got man we got some what what dunkaroos this isn't your this isn't parenting techniques, okay? I was hoping you caught that. I don't know, man. I was trying to liven it up up in here. You feel me?
Starting point is 00:49:52 Will this show ever end? What are we doing here? We got King and her Stinger. This is it, King and Stinger? This is it, boys. Up first, this is Chase and Breedwell and Nick Longbottom from Cincinnati, Ohio. Nick Longbottom. From Cincinnati. Gang, gang.
Starting point is 00:50:05 I have a king and a stinger for y'all. Loud ass music. Oh, shit. Yeah. Hit them subs, son. Watch this. Oh, shit. Ride it, boy.
Starting point is 00:50:30 Hurry, bro. Gonna catch you riding dirty. Damn. Holy shit. It's blowing his mustache off Dang That's that sound perm boy That's when that jock jams
Starting point is 00:51:02 Is your stylist You know what I'm saying Wow look at that fur by the front, baby. Look at that candy apple inside, dude. Damn, bro. This guy is super swaggy. Oh, king, king, king. I don't know where he can get those two 12-inch subs anymore.
Starting point is 00:51:18 12? Those are 12s, I think. Yeah, those are 12s. They call them 12s, son. 12,000s, bro. Yeah. 12,000s, dude. You see how 12, son. 12,000, bro. Yeah. 12,000, dude. You see how much shake was in that thing?
Starting point is 00:51:29 That's that Johnny Neutron, son. More shake than a fucking Jamba Juice, dude. This guy's got it, bro. He's got motor oil in his mustache, dude. I got a new fave. This guy's my fave. This guy'll suck start a fucking Honda Civic, bro. This guy ain't joking right here.
Starting point is 00:51:44 Decent man. Decent American man here. fucking Honda Civic, bro. This guy ain't joking right here. Decent man. Decent American man here. Well, yeah, Brendan. Now, I got a few questions. I'd like to see the outside. I think he's put all his money into the speakers inside. I got to be honest. I don't think this is a car.
Starting point is 00:51:55 I think this is almost just like a little space in the yard or in a... I don't think so. You think it's a hot box? Autobody shop. You think it's a hot box? Yeah, I think it's almost just like a weed station. Because if you look at this bar that we see right here on the top left, that red bar, you don't even have to play the video right there. Yeah, I think it's almost just like a weed station because if you look at this bar that we see right here on the top left,
Starting point is 00:52:06 that red bar, you don't even have to play the video right there. That's some sort of special... It looks like it's supporting the
Starting point is 00:52:13 speakers. Oh, it could be. Some sort of special hovel where this guy really has some decent sound. Because back in the day, gangsters used
Starting point is 00:52:20 to have the boom, boom, boom, the 12s. You could buy bass hits. I think it could buy bass hits. I think it was called bass hits. And you're going to date an underage girl, and you're going to not move away from town if you have this system.
Starting point is 00:52:30 Yeah, you're going to be drinking Mike's Hard Lemonade and driving around town sad. You're going to be making Mike's Hard Lemonade, dude, all over town. Yeah, Mike's going to hire you to make his lemonade. You're never going to leave town. You're going to get your ass beat by a lot of local dads, bro, if you have this sound system. It should actually be in that
Starting point is 00:52:48 section of the store. Hey, you want to get your ass beat by a local parent? By these 12s. Yeah. Shout out to this guy. I don't even know where you get that done these days. Best Buy used to do it. A place called Shaq City used to do it in my hood. And let's go to the culture corner because this is
Starting point is 00:53:04 something that's hot in Asian culture. And black. Yeah. So what do we know? More of an Asian black thing. Chin, you had speakers in your car. I did. Yeah, you did.
Starting point is 00:53:12 Big time. Fuck yeah, you did. Wow, big time, huh? What, did you have 12s? 12s and 15s. Woo, daddy. Damn, that's 27 worth, bro. Fuck yeah.
Starting point is 00:53:23 Fast and furious chin over here. Ludicrous. You ever race for pink slips, chin? No, because my car was really slow. Because you had so many goddamn speakers in it? Or all your friends were in it? It was a different car. You live your life one quarter mile at a time, bro.
Starting point is 00:53:39 Amen, brother. Right on, dude. Fucking king, this loudspeaker. You don't see it enough anymore. Yeah, praise God, bro. I raise hell around the neighborhood very dope hey what's up boys i got a king of the sting it for y'all but first theo you look like the guy that accepts tickets at the entrance of a corn maze brendan you look like a guy that gets fucking lost in the corn maze so corn mazes king it or sting it love what you guys are doing keep up the good work buzz buzz
Starting point is 00:54:05 gang gang i like a corn maze man it's a good way to spend time with your family uh you can be outdoors you can be at one with nature you can see what nature can do you know some of the you know things i'm thinking of. Geysers, waterfalls, corn mazes, just different things where you get nature at its fullest parameters. Shut up. Shut up, Ken.
Starting point is 00:54:39 Okay? Get back in your car, dude. Okay? Get back in your car. I'll see you at the gas station okay second of all you what was this guy's name his name was uh ethan second of all ethan yeah bro you're gonna be fine dude yeah you'll be fine dude don't worry about crying all the time uh just keep taking care of yourself dude you get out of that maze eventually dude uh yeah uh fucking yeah man yes to corn mazes but i like when they you got someone they're chasing maybe a an old convict some sort of guy that needs money maybe an eagle yeah maybe a
Starting point is 00:55:24 fucking big thick eagle maybe a fucking big, thick eagle. Maybe a fucking guy just got out of prison carrying a bunch of fucking Cheeto puffs. You know what I'm saying? I like a little danger, though. Yeah, that's the best thing about a lot of haunted houses. They'll hire anybody. So you do get a lot of those type of client,
Starting point is 00:55:36 you know, worker clientele. You get a very mixed clientele where you should be scared. You have a guy fucking hit you with a real sword in there, bro. You know, at some of those high-end haunted places. No, they'll do it. You'll sign a waiver. They'll do it. Yeah, but corn maze. How about a guy fucking hit you with a real sword in there, bro. Yeah. At some of those high-end haunted places. No, they'll do it. You'll sign a waiver. They'll do it. Yeah, but corn maze.
Starting point is 00:55:48 How about a popcorn maze, dude? That'd be fun. I'd run through that bitch with my mouth open, boy. Fuck yeah. You know? You like cinnamon popcorn? Yeah, I like it. God, that was my favorite as a kid.
Starting point is 00:55:58 The red? I like it, man. I like a nice caramel corn, too. I like it, all right. You ever had Chicago popcorn? Uh-uh. Oh, fuck. Huh?
Starting point is 00:56:05 Chicago popcorn? It's cheddar mixed with caramel. It's cheese. It's cheese popcorn mixed with caramel popcorn. Mix it up. Bang. Yes, okay. I thought you were making a sound. Yeah. I've never had that or heard of it. Who doesn't like it? When we go to Chicago, get the popcorn. Yep, I love this guy. I love what you're doing,
Starting point is 00:56:22 buddy. Yeah, good luck getting out of the maze. Last one, boys. This is Jay Cates from Brighton, Illinois. It's Big Jay. Oh, beautiful area. What's up, Theo? What's up, Brendan? This is Jay from Illinois.
Starting point is 00:56:39 You sure? I'll double check with you. We always can't be cool and hang out with the cool people. Be swole and such. Finally get to be in your 40s looking for some other stuff to do. Hobbies. It's one of those things. Let me ask you a quick question.
Starting point is 00:56:55 Can't get or sting it. Remote control airplanes. Those RC headers, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, yeah. Stuff that you thought you would have played with when you was just a kid. No, but now you got money. Gang, gang, bug, bug. Jesus Christ, dude. Electric eagles, Brendan.
Starting point is 00:57:18 Love you guys. Love you too, brother. Thanks for reaching out from Brighton. Beautiful field there you got there. Yeah, it's a nice green field. Look at that electric eagle, boy. I feel like he gets boring after a minute no it doesn't bro god damn somebody about to get fucked up you don't have a hat on a swivel bro you see it just came right by us play freeze tag with that thing bro you hear your kid touching yourself in the next room you fucking buzz his ass yeah are your kids out in the garden hiding in a wheelbarrow touching his own
Starting point is 00:57:48 wiener you're buzzing with that hitter or i hit that mexican eagle at your fucking zoo oh yeah bro that sinaloa yeah take that fucking eagle away dude feel me done a couple of they the guy said they have a bunch of not a bunch of birds birds, but a decent amount, he said. I bet. Get some Mexican flamingos out there, bro. I'm waiting. I emailed him. And Diane Brown. Oh, yeah, the famed brown flamingos of the Sinaloa Zoo. I like that.
Starting point is 00:58:16 Sounds like a football team. Right? You seen the browns? We got 12 of them. Yeah. Be cool. One big, thick one. Call them Big Brown.
Starting point is 00:58:23 No. It's about your coffee company, dude. All right? Whatever that thing's called. Or adult hobbies as well. Either one. You got to stay busy, dude. You got to stay busy.
Starting point is 00:58:34 The next thing you know, you're on the internet hating on people who are successful. So you got to stay fucking busy. Or jacking off or touching yourself or touching someone else you don't even know that well. Or DMing underage girls, you know? So fly planes, bro. Fucking flying. Yep, I love what you're doing here, man. You're out and about and you're enjoying your life and you're living it.
Starting point is 00:58:52 And that's what we got to do, dude. That's what we got to do. Let's go, huh? Let's do it. Let's do it, huh? Keep touching me, bro.

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