The Golden Hour - Episode 95: Tribute to Trebek

Episode Date: November 13, 2020

The gang pays tribute to Alex Trebek by playing a KATS Jeopardy Special, and talk Woah Vicky, Shake Weights, Ladyboy Jugglers, The History Of Bow Ties, Minority Cartoons, Celebrity Election Conspiracies, Theo Threatens to Bed Us All and much more!Hims - https://forhims.com/kats5BetterHelp - https://betterhelp.com/katsManscaped - https://manscaped.com/ use code: KATSAthletic Greens - https://athleticgreens.com/katsSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Uh, let's do... Uh, who makes it for 800? Who makes it for 800? Galaxy Tablets. Samsung. Correct. Brendan for 800. Suck these nuts, Theo. Back off my broccolini.

Get your life together. It is. Don't touch me, bro. I'm not touching you, dude. Look, we got a room full of bad bitches. Yeah. I told you I don't trust that mutt, man. Why not? He's so sweet. What's his name? Guadalupe? Chewy.

Chewy. So Jesus. I think he voted for Kanye West. I don't trust him. I don't trust him. He's wearing an ascot just like you do. He is. He's got that blue rag. Must be a crip.

He's banging. Gang banging. A lot of blue in here. I see the bow tie. I don't know what gang that is though. Yeah, I'm ready. I'm ready to fight whoever, dude. You came ready, man. Now, is that a Nashville-style thing with the bow tie? Huh?

Oh, I didn't know I had this on. I don't know, actually. I don't know. I saw this in that movie Man of Constant Sorrow. Did you see that movie? Nope. You know where I saw it? The movie Problem Child.

Oh. You look like the kid in Problem Child grew up and just got out of rehab. Let's bring him up. Yeah, the little redhead dude. And that kid died, actually. No! John Ritter did. Yeah. But the kid also did. He did? Yeah, more than one people can die, dude. Come on, Chappelle. Wow.

That was an unbelievably limited scope of death over here. You think only one person from a movie can die, Chappelle? This kid's still alive. He's probably still doing it. It's a phenomenal movie. And he's causing all those antics just because he was looking for love, man. He didn't trust anybody.

Real problem. Stop for him, man. Yeah, he's alive. And now he's on Bad Friends podcast, I think. Oh, that's that guy. Is how it ended for him. Not well. Oh, wow. Look at him. Seeing that guy. Is how it ended for him. Not well. Oh, wow.

Look at him. Seeing that podcast, it's just basically they wake up this Asian kid and bother him every week. You can tell he doesn't want to be there. Yeah. Oh, it's unbelievable. Very sad to see. So he's still alive? That's kind of cool that he moved from traditional media movies into podcasts, though.

Good for him. Who, this guy did? Yeah. I mean, he's on Bad Friends now after being- podcasts, though. Good for him. Who, this guy, dude? Yeah, I mean, he's on Bad Friends now after being... Oh, yeah. But is he alive, though, for reals, Nick? I mean, I don't know if you heard Bad Friends. That's

nearly where my mind went. Prom Child. Really? Oh, yeah. I haven't seen a bow tie in a hot second. You, Prom Child, Pee Wee Herman. Who else? Man of Constant Sorrow. Can you bring up that man? I don't know a bow tie in a hot second. You, Prom Child, Pee Wee Herman. Who else? Man of Constant Sorrow. Can you bring up that man? I don't know who that is. I feel like it's a southern educated man thing wearing a bow tie.

Yeah. Yeah. Good for you, dude. Yeah, it shows intellect, Brennan. Yeah, I know. You look smart. It's like, hey, look at my neck while I'm smart as fuck. That's what this thing says. You look like you're going to throw up. Kind of trick people. Yeah. Yeah. No, you look smart. It's like, hey, look at my neck while I'm smart as fuck. That's what this thing says.

Hell yeah. You look like you're going to throw. Kind of trick people. Yeah. Yeah, no, that is cool. You look like you're going to throw Make America Gay Again party. Oh, gosh.

Don't smile, Chin. Hey, everybody, make sure you vote. Oh, I see how it goes in here, huh? Brendan throws out a gay joke, and then Chappelle, who was employed by Brendan, feels forced to laugh. Even though Brendan used the same

joke the other 93 episodes that we've done. Okay. I see how it works in here, bro. Brendan looks like a librarian in somebody's butt. He's saying you look like shit. Damn. Doo-doo decimal system, dude.

You look like shit. Damn, bro. Nick appreciated that librarian. One MAGA joke and Theo's off the rails. He took a tough L over the weekend. Yeah, tough L, bro. You look like a candy corn came out of the creatine closet. Dude, you look like you sell Shake Wakes on the dark web, man.

What are you talking about? Are those things still around? I don't know. Oh, they are? Yeah, I feel like old people use them. Old people? No, the best one, you got a fat girl who's using it, and then her tricep, when she's shaking like this, her tricep's just twerking.

I like that fat on a lady on the back of that arm. It means she could cook. Really? You know a lady can cook when she's got that meaty tricep? Yeah. The little thing right here? It's not meaty. Brendan, I'm trying to be nice.

Yeah. Oh, get it, Doug. Oh, wow. Show the back again. I like how the guy gets tired. He's all... He's all... No, I have a lot of pain in my back. I'm trying to see where it's at.

I've never seen muscles in my own back. Apparently, all he does is he does that for 20 minutes and that's what he looks like. Yeah, you just shake And then you just what Wait to feel strong Dang Oh dude he got exhausted right there

Six minutes Guaranteed Oh damn Whoa Whoa Whoa This thing I've seen how this plays out

Man Who is that Go back Who are those guys doing Where is that at It looks like a naval base. Is that Nick Swartzen? Is this Key West?

Where is this? Damn. What? Looks like a gavel base. Someone made that as a joke. That couldn't have been a serious thing. This is a real commercial, Chappelle. No.

See, and this is what happens when not everybody has the same privileges, man. Yeah, I guess. At least they can vote now, you know? I know, man. That's crazy. This guy should not be able to vote, though. Well, at least they can get married now. Wait, do they still make a lot of money, you think?

No. No? No, no. The gig's up on Shake Weight. The gig's up? Yeah, I think so. But so many people bought them. I don't think so.

That's why they went out of business. I wonder. Who bought one in here? What? Chin? No, I didn't. Never? Never.

Denver considered it? No, he said no, Brendan. Look at him. I've been wanting to try one because it looks so fun, but I never bought it. You don't know Chin like I know Chin. You wanted to try it? Yeah, I wanted to try it. I feel like they're a big gag if around Christmas time.

I bet they rock it up because that's a funny gift to bust out for someone. See, yeah, they probably make a lot of money just being a gag gift. Yeah, funny how your grandma get ahold of that thing. What's a gag gift in the Vietnamese community? A gag gift in the Vietnamese community? I feel like it's usually gifting someone a guest appearance from the local lady boy. That's really popular in vietnam i used to go to my grandma's house back there and my grandma would throw these huge parties because

everyone from my family in america would come over it's like 30 of us and she'd throw this huge party with a bunch of lady boys and they would just like perform circus acts i don't know what it is wait lady boy yeah lady boy is like juggling like juggling there was a lady who would like juggle bottles and then like and what do you mean juggling juggling like throwing them in the air catching them throwing them back up good question one of them knew how to like sure they weren't juggling each other's nuts in their mouth cat probably as like a past time i thought juggling was a racial slur also yeah look at these jugglings who would it be a racial slur for i Yeah. Look at these jugglings.

Who would it be a racial slur for? I mean, people that carry jugs. I don't know who those are. Probably. Juggalos. Wait, lady boys? It's probably. Look at these jugglings.

Dog the bounty hunter's wife, dude. Look at these jugglings. R.I.P. I know. R.I.P. R.I.P. with the big jugs. R.I.P. Beth, man. Beth Smith, man. They have to do two different caskets. One for her body, one for them tits. Oh.P. I know, R.I.P. R.I.P. with the big jugs. R.I.P. Beth, man. Beth Smith, man. They had to do two different caskets.

One for her body, one for them tits. Oh, Brendan. Get a life, Brendan. And those were real? Huh? Yeah, they were real. Dude, how can you be a real black man if you don't know big white titties? Facts.

Facts, bro. What do you need a fucking... Facts! What do you need, a quarter pack of new horse between these bitches to know that they're real dog damn bro

what are you fucking part you Matt Barnes dog tighten up dog go full black at least one day in here

no I can't at least one day I can't get with that Jesus that's a whole lot of you can't recognize real authentic titters? That's titty, brother.

That's American titty, man. Yeah, man. It's got some cash between them tits. Some sweaty cash. Dude, that's the rascal fats right there, bro. Damn, looks like each one of those has been ordered, has its own subscription to HelloFresh. I think she's getting that ButcherVox,

son. Brendan, you're going to hell, man. This lady is deceased, Brendan. And you're sitting here ripping on her? Didn't he see a clip of us ripping on her or something? Get mad or something? His cousin reached out to me and said, quit making fun of Beth, you know?

And I blame, of course, blame it on Brendan. Oh, she really passed away. And it is the kind of stuff Brendan knows Brendan doesn't have any you didn't know she passed away I don't know anything about these people and which cousin

was it no big big titty bitches okay lovely lady that full breast white meat BRB dog hey was it

was it the cousin who pretends he's be right Beth baby and I bet she's gonna come back she'll definitely come back as a love seed or something else yeah i went for season 19 or the fuck they're on oh they're still going uh no he got fired for dropping the n-word no but he picked it back up a year later and uh he picked

it back up on youtube their show's back though the show's back uh i don't think it's but on like a and e or where the hell it's on? History? Something happened, man. Leland came down with something, but he's better now. And yeah, they're back. Yeah, because he originally got fired for dropping the N-bomb. Oh, wow. And what's the N-bomb? One time, dude.

I'm too old for that. All right. There it is. See? Well, that's season one. See, they're releasing season one on YouTube. Brendan looks like fucking Carl Lentz if he was a scarecrow, dude. You look like an unbelievable. Dude, how about your boy Carl Lentz if he was a scarecrow, dude. You look like an unbelievable.

Dude, how about your boy Carl Lentz? I told you, son. What? The fuck boy closest to God. Dude, he had a falling out. He had a falling out with his wife. Dude, how about the church, though? How are you going to fire the guy over making a mistake?

I thought the church was. I thought the church was. It doesn't be as great as Carl Lentz. It's an unmarried sports agent. They found out who it was. It was love, not just sex, and they only broke upmarried sports agent because it was love not just sex and they only broke up last week so he fell in love outside of his marriage huh oh said he was the unmarried sports agent does the girl not have a phone oh it doesn't it doesn't show who the girl

is no let's remain a close friend of beavers said they did for more than five months before breaking up. I hope it all gets better, man. He's a good dude. But also, what kind of church kicks the guy out of a church for making a mistake? I know. That's not what they do. You don't get kicked out if you're gay.

That's a good point, man. I don't know that but i if i'm gay i'd be shocked yeah not me dog not me i'd be like yeah that makes sense but i'll also be like called it and then also chapelle do me a hundred bucks just be bad on it y'all did yep dude so we'll see bro i'll tell you this if i'm gay i'm fucking one of you freaks bro so if y'all want to get it well he likes light gray so what's up 171 baby so aggressive huh that's what i'm saying bro y'all want this white dart you're gonna get it dad so back off son unless you want to fucking unless you want to see the funk, son. Y'all out of here, all right?

I'll freaking GHB one of you guys and douse y'all up. No, man, be cool. Yeah, be cool. Be cool, man. Now y'all slipping up. Hey, be cool, man. Now y'all slipping, bro. Be cool, man, because you get real gay with that bow tie on, bro.

That bow tie make you real gay right now. Dude, this is a freaking business neck piece, Brendan. You don't know about the South, man. Not about the South. If you wore a bow tie in the 50s, you were a racist. No. Oh, yeah. Oh, it's science. Yeah, look it up. Look up the history of the bow tie.

For real? History, southern bow tie. And you know who you're going to see first? KFC, Colonel Sanders. KFC? What is it? Kentucky Fried Chicken. Ugh, disgusting. It tastes like elbows.

It's disgusting. Have you had elbows before? I've had pig elbows. Pig elbows? Oh, okay, that's fair. When I was growing up, we had to eat. You know, they used to take us. In field trips in the South, south they take you to plantations

and stuff like that a lot they'll take you out to like old you know you know cotton farms all kind of stuff like that and you'll have like a servant lunch or whatever

they'll be like oh today we're having a slave lunch or a servant lunch interesting and so they get you out there you get like a piece of like corn pone or whatever it's called and a fucking

pig arm or whatever and you have it we've got there like seven years of like corn pone or whatever it's called and a pig arm or whatever and you have it dude we've got there like seven years old snacking on this in the sun huh in the sun oh yeah it's horrible it was horrible man someone told me the ride at disneyland is racist there's a couple oh no they're trying to say splash mountains racist yeah oh yeah yeah wow what is splash just splash a racial slur or something splash mountain what we're playing the music i guess splashes no they're trying to say they're Yeah. Oh, yeah. Wow. What is Splash? Is Splash a racial slur or something? It's Splash Mountain. Splash Mountain is a racial slur. Are they playing the music?

I guess Splash is. No, they're trying to say they're racist towards rabbits. What? Because it's a rabbit and a fox. There's a song that's supposedly like an old type of racist type song. Against black people or foxes and rabbits? Black people. Is it really?

That's what I read. I was just on it a couple months ago. I didn't see anybody. It says the history and storylines are steeped in extremely problematic and stereotypical racist tropes from the 1946 film Song of the South. It's my favorite ride. I've ridden it a couple of times. It's a good ride, I will say.

It's hands down my favorite. And my sons. They're reaching in this. I know, Doug. So they're going to switch it up to Prince and the Frog? If anything's not racist, I mean, do they have any black characters at Disneyland or not? Yeah, the Princess and the Frog. Okay.

Tiana. Who else? Mickey's black. His ears are half black. He's half black. His ears are, his arms are black. Sergeant Bubbles from Lilo and Stitch. Okay. C's half black. His ears are, his arms are black. Sergeant Bubbles from Lilo and Stitch.

Okay. Cobra Bubbles. So military. Oh, Frozone. Oh, Frozone. The voodoo guy from... Bring up Mickey. Bring up damn Mickey.

I mean, that little mix of all of them. I think Goofy might be black. Yeah, I could see it. But Mickey's, look at that. He's half black. Look at him from the back.

He's white-faced. Look at him from the back, dude. Yeah, he's half black. Oh that. He's half black. Look at him from the back. He's white-faced. Yeah, he's in the back. Oh, a cop would shoot him. Look at him from the back. Look at the one from the back over there. No, he's cheeked up. Yeah, he's cheeked up, too. There you go.

Look at that. He's not cheeked up. Let me see. Them little booty cheeks. Why are you looking at that little mouse's butt, dude? Get a life, man. Get a library, also. Get a life. Yeah, I'm trying to think. There is no other black characters, huh? Get a life, man. Get a library also. Get a life.

Yeah, I'm trying to think. There is no other black characters, huh? Not a lot. Moana, she is. She looks like a scarecrow at a GNC, dude. Get your fucking life together, all right? No birds landing on this way. Shout out to...

Yeah, not a lot, Disney. Yeah, that's crazy. But it's also, you're not taking it, they're taking it in a context specifically that if you look at Mickey, if you want to look at him,

he's half black and half white. The white part is this, is the little part of his face, you know? But it's also tough for Justin Trudeau, kind of. Yeah, that's fair. Who's Justin Trudeau?

Mayor of Canada. Prime Minister of Canada. He's half black, half white? Yeah, according's fair. Who's Justin Trudeau? Mayor of Canada. Prime Minister of Canada. He's half black, half white? Yeah, according to him he is. What about Vicky, bro? Vicky's the blackest bitch in this. Oh, Vicky? She got 40% black on one of her tests.

Yeah, she's hood. Is she funny? We need to get her in here, man. She's a legend, bro. Click on her video. Let me see if she's still talking like that. Did she get famous off Dr. Phil, too? Uh-uh.

No, I don't know what she got famous off of. I think it was... Just her videos. How old is she, Nick? I want to hear her talk. I can't find one. Yeah, you got to hear her talk. Well, Vicky's about it.

Wasn't she rapping for a while? Yeah, she's dope. That Trump dance when he's jerking off that ghost. Oh, yeah. He was like. Oh, he's. God. I said she's 20 years old.

She's what? 20. Oh, okay. Well, I didn't say anything about her. I only looked at her eyes. I'm just talking about her. I don't care about her. I'm not saying anything like that.

I'm just saying that she... Maybe on YouTube? Here she is. Nope, that's not it. Try on YouTube, Nick. I'm sure there's a video. Look at her story. Look at her story.

We can't watch stories. She was rapping for a hot second. She'd be like, I can't do her voice, but it's pretty... She has some songs. She's got songs? She has some hit songs, yeah.

Semi-hits. And then look at Dawgs, Mitch. Didn't she get in a fight with Bad Babies? Yeah, they fought each other outside of Arapasala. I think Bad... Outside of Arapasala. Well, Vicky... You in my business, don't do that!

That's her voice. Goddamn, Drif, I don't play with you! He's a true player. Stop playing with me. Why'd she put a dick on his face? That guy's also drinking wine outside. That's such a gangster move. I want cheese off top.

Nacho. And a green guac cilantro. Well, Vicky's about it, though, man. She tested 40% black on a test. She did? Yep. Oh. No. Yeah. Oh. No.

Yeah. Look it up. Like the 23andMe? I don't know what it was. Don't you have a YouTube dance video? It could have been a damn SAT. I have no idea what it was, but she got 40% urban, and she came back, and she went full throttle with it.

Damn. So I dropped the N-bomb? I don't know about that. Yeah, I doubt she did. Because Mike Perry, the UFC fighter, got 1 one percent on his uh ancestry.com thing and just drops the n-bomb but that's like i got one percent oh he drops like if you want to tell mike perry he can't use it you can't bro maybe i can't because i do a pretty good job all right let's move on man sometimes your wiener doesn't work man and i'm not you know when do

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See website for full details and safety information. Remember, that's 4am.com slash cats5. Listen, man, is there something interfering with your happiness, Theo? Yes, Brandon. Yeah, me too, bro. So I reached out to BetterHelp. Listen, BetterHelp links you up with a licensed professional therapist. You can start communicating under 48 hours, so you've got to wait about two days, dog.

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need a little pep. And they don't know where to start. Nope, and this is an easy spot. Whether it's something you stick with or not, it's a great place to start. BetterHelp.com slash K-A-T-S for 10% off your first month. But yeah, I mean, I think they got enough black characters out place to start betterhelp.com slash k-a-t-s for 10 off your first month but yeah i mean i think they got enough black characters out there i mean but they have some all black cartoons too don't

they does disney have any baby's kids family yeah baby's kids i don't know baby's kids was disney though no i'm just saying you say well i mean a lot of characters though it's like they don't have color as far as like white black that's true That's true. If you look at cars, cars, it's fucking cars. They're red, yeah. But you got white dudes doing the voices. Maybe you do. We don't know. I don't know.

Simpsons, they're yellow. But they had to fire Abu because they said it was racial profile. Because he was the only brown one. And they let him go. They let him go? They got rid of Cleveland, too, because Cleveland was voiced by a white guy and family guy. Cleveland did his own thing, though. No, they just got rid of the character of Pooh

because it was voiced by the guy who does Hank Azaria. He does so many voices. He said he would quit the show if they didn't get rid of the character because he's woke. Damn. Wait, no. He decided that? I think it was like he said it. Look, people. He decided that? I think it was like...

He said it. Look, people say a lot of things. People say a lot of things that never really come to fruition. What's weird to me is during this election, certain celebrities that got bought off, like you can tell, because especially towards the end of the election, they're like,

Trump went for like Lil Wayne and Lil Pump and like the urban community. And then fucking the Democrats, they got The Rock up in that bitch. Paid The Rock a hefty fee. I think he went over like 10 million fucking followers after that. That's crazy. He's the most followed person in the world after that. Trump had Gucci Gang.

Yeah. Gucci Gang, Gucci Gang, Gucci Gang, Gucci Gang. Who's that, Lil Pump? Yeah. And then he had Lil Wayne. But Lil Wayne, like you could tell. Lollipop? Like someone. Yeah. And then he had Lil Wayne, but Lil Wayne, like, you could tell. Lollipop? Like someone, yeah.

Like a lollipop. Like a lollipop. Like, you could tell they sent him something to tweet. Like, it wasn't his words. They just paid him a fucking bag of cash for, like, tweet this. Trump ran a bad campaign, man. Better than Biden, though. Biden just stayed in his house and won.

Pretty dope. I agree. But they got ghosts voting for Biden, dude. You know? I don't know. That's your president. Trump was jacking off ghosts. That's true.

Watch your mouth, dog. That's your president. Trump was jacking off ghosts while ghosts were voting for Biden. He should have been like, hey, he should have asked him to vote for him. Right. Have you seen that video, Nick? Which one? Trump jacking off the ghosts.

Mm-mm. Where he's dancing to Macho Man. Is that what he's dancing to? Out of all the songs, because you know most artists won't let him use the, because they have to get a sign-off. The artist has to sign off to let him use his music. So he was using something else, and they told him not to use it. So then I guess Macho Man.

Macho Man. Damn. It's so old school, dude. I know. Okay, Trump. The Trump pump. The Trump pump, baby. A lot of old people do that.

The older you get, the last thing that still dances is your arms. That's what you do when you leave your shake weight at home. Yeah. Oh, there you go. Your legs kind of just don't go with you anymore. Also, white people can't dance. That's exactly what they do. Damn.

Speaking of ghosts, we lost a great man over the weekend. R.I.P. Alex Trebek. I love Jeopardy. You said Rip Jeopardy. You watch a lot of Jeopardy? You know, I like Canada, man. And if you talk to me, you know I like Canada, dude.

Or if you ever talk to me or call me or anything. And one of my favorite things about Canada is the people that come out of there. Not only do we get fresh water from Canada, it's one of the biggest ossifiers in the world. How about the maple syrup? You're welcome. I'm talking. I'm just letting you know, dude. I knew that.

Okay, keep going. He didn't get there yet. You're going to get there. Yeah, say something else we don't need right now, Brendan. So what I'm saying is they do a lot of stuff for us that we don't think about. One of those things is the people that have come from there. Jim Carrey. Norm MacDonald.

Norm MacDonald. Wayne Gretzky's daughter. Wayne Gretzky's daughter. That guy that smoked crack. That guy died. Tom Ford. Yes. Rob Ford. Rob Ford. Who also went to the comedy store one night. How crazy is that? Isn't that awesome?

And other people. Will Sasso. Justin Bieber. Will Sasso. JB. Drake. Run through the six. The Weeknd. The Weeknd. That's borderline. Simple Plan. JB. Drake. The Weeknd. The Weeknd. That's borderline. Simple Plan. Wednesday.

Adams. She's not really. I just thought that one was The Weeknd. Anyway, what I'm trying to tell you right now, Brennan, is that he was Canadian. Alex Trebek. Yeah, I love Jeopardy. Here is the tribute they opened up to. Alex Trebek.

Yeah, I love Jeopardy. Here is the tribute they opened up to. Just the executive producer said some kind words about Alex for a show back. I'm Mike Richards, the executive producer of Jeopardy. Over the weekend, we lost our beloved host, Alex Trebek. This is an enormous loss for our staff and crew, for his family, and for his millions of fans. He loved this show and everything it stood for. In fact, he taped his final episodes less than two weeks ago.

Damn. ago. He will forever be an inspiration for his constant desire to learn, his kindness, and for his love of his family. We will air his final 35 episodes as they were shot. That's what he wanted. On behalf of everyone here at Jeopardy, thank you for everything, Alex. This is Jeopardy. Wow. Damn. That's heavy. But we're going to pick it up.

That's not slow as fuck. I think to honor him, we'll play a round of Jeopardy, and Chin will fill the shoes. Now, there is an opening now in Hollywood, Chin. Chin. Anyone want to go for that? I don't think Chin would be perfect, Chin. Is it the host of Jeopardy?

Yeah. You know how much money Alex was making? You have any idea? I'm sure he's making a ton. He's about 25 mil a year, son. What? 30 mil a year. Look it up.

Damn. That Pat Sajak, that hoe, who is the easy job. That hoe. I actually thought died last week, and I tweeted that, and I want to apologize for that. Look it up. Damn. That Pat Sajak, that hoe, who is the easy job. I actually thought died last week, and I tweeted that, and I want to apologize. What's his little dime piece that fucking flips the numbers and gets paid millions, too? Vanna White. Yeah, Vanna White, too. I can't stand him.

Maybe you had a vision, but you just kind of mixed it up, and you said Pat Sajak. I get weak visions. He's actually pretty hilarious on Twitter, though. Shout out, Pat Sajak. Pat Sajak. Yeah, he's got a good twitter um but uh yeah so i thought we'd play a round of jeopardy and uh we're gonna do it uh as close we're gonna honor the source material as close as possible uh chappelle will be our announcer chin will be alex trebek and it'll be theo versus brandon first cat so write your names on the uh on the board or on your your thing and then prop them up if you can.

Because they always do. Those are your buzzers. Oh, name on this card? Yeah, yeah. Name on the card. Does Chewy fart? Huh? Does Chewy fart?

Yeah, Chewy definitely just farted. All right. It is. Chewy farted? Oh, yeah. I don't trust that dog. Wow. I've said that from the jump.

I don't trust him. Oh, man. He farted, huh? Yeah, yeah. It's pretty bad. But it was a good filler. Way to... It's very backwards so they can read it, right?

And then if you can prop it up. And then they usually do like a... Little doodle. And we will begin. All right. We will begin. All right. This is Jeffrey.

All right. And we're going to take it to our contestants. Our first contestant, coming all the way from Covington, Louisiana, owns his own clothing line called Big Butts and Muluts. It's the On, everybody. Our second contestant coming from Aurora, Colorado. He is a kingpin of a biker gang that only allows thick people. Sorry to those skinnies out there.

It's Brendan Schaaf. Our last contestant coming in from San Jose, California. She is working her way up to showing us those feet. Give it up for Canton Lee, everybody. Only fans. Only feet. Only feet. And now, Chin, you.

Say a little something. Intro of the show. Guys, welcome to the show. Jeopardy begins now. The first category. Yeah, read all the categories. All right, read all. Left to right. We'll read all the categories out to you.

They're schooling you in a group. Russian history, flora, vocabulary, and finally we want to know who makes it. Usually it's Procter & Gamble. Usually. You can tell them who goes first. We should have decided that. Those are your buzzers. Wait until Chin is done reading the question before hitting the buzzer,

or else you will not be called on. We don't have a way to lock you out. Unfortunately, Jeopardy does. That's how they police that. You can block them on your phone if you want them. Does someone have to pick how much first?

Tell them who should go first and pick the first category. Kat can go first today. Is that okay? I don't know how to play, but yeah. Go for it, Kat. Which one do you want? I'm going to go with in a group for $200. in a group for 200 in a group for 200 seven years is a song from this group lucas is their lead singer oh fuck oh it's one of my favorite songs no it is not seven years old

all right we didn't get that one. Do I tell the answer now? Yeah. It'll go faster. Okay. The answer is Lucas Graham. Sorry. Cat, pick again.

One of my favorite songs. Oh, okay. Vocabulary for 200. Good again. Good luck, Theo. Vocabulary for 200. Word for the result you get when you divide one number by another. Where's the question?

Yeah, where's it at? Since Alex left, Jeopardy sucks. Maybe we should just use a Ouija board. This is a time so we like. Maybe we should just play Jenga. Word for the result you get when you divide one number by another. A dividend? Nope.

Is that it? Anyone else? All right. Sorry. The answer is quotient or the question is quotient. Can I pick again? Jesus. What is quotient? or the question is quotient. Can I pick again? Jesus. What is quotient?

Correct, correct. Correct. Thank you. It's been a while. Honor the man. Thank you. Chin. What is quotient?

Again, school new 200. School new 200. Spanish, it's how you say river. Some are grande. Grande. River in Spanish. River in Spanish. I'm going to go with, what did I press?

Is it river? Any, the top button. Top button. Hmm? Or top row. Top row. Numbers. Yes, Brennan guessed. I didn't guess Top row. Numbers. Guess, Brennan.

Brennan guessed. I didn't guess. Yeah, you did. No, I haven't. You just guessed out loud. But I didn't officially buzz in. Beep, beep, beep. Let's get it.

All right, next one. Pick next. What is Rio? What is it? Rio. Oh. I said Rio. Which one was that?

Schooling you 200? Yeah, schooling you 200. It goes faster if you just go straight down the line once you pick a category, but I'm not going to make you guys. Schooling you for 400, please, Chin. All right. So, do I just read this? That's a little weird.

Well, Alex had a harder job than I thought. I think he had a smarter team. He picked it wrong. Yeah, that's fair. job than I thought. I think he had a smarter team. Fizz Ed, as Patches said, if you can do a wrench,

sorry, if you can do it to a wrench, fat Patches, you can do it to a ball. So time to play this game, kids. Dodgeball. He got one. He did it. The answer and question were labeled wrong. I'll take in a group 400.

In a group 400. All right, this is wrong too. Oh, here we go. Joe Jonas joined some friends in this band that served us cake by the ocean. Oh, fuck. What is DNCE? She got it. Wow.

For 400. I love Jonas Brothers. Shout out to Joe. My buttonsCE? She got it. Wow. For 400. I love Jonas Brothers. Shout out to Jonas. My buttons aren't all thick or working. Yeah. Someone help deal with his buttons. If you press the bottom row, or not the bottom row, the- Top row.

The one with A. Oh, there you go. All right. Sweet. Another one with Q. They're back. Sweet. Go ahead, Kat.

Come on, Kat. Let's do Russian history for 200. Russian history for 200. It's usually hookers. From 1917 to 1991, a federation of Russia and other communist republics was known by this collective name. Theo. USSR, please. What is?

I think we're going to not wait for them just because that makes it too hard. Just first person to buzz in going forward. Yeah, go. USSR, please. What is? I think we're going to not wait for him just because that makes it too hard. Just first person to buzz in going forward. USSR, correct. Okay, Theo. Give me that money, fam. Good morning. Give me that money. Theo's mom's like this.

Yes. She's cheering you on, dog. Go ahead, dog. Your pick. Okay, I'm going to go with vocabulary for 800, please. Ooh, getting saucy on him, doggy. From the Greek inscription, it's a short poem with a witty turn of thought. What is an epigram?

What number was that? I'm going to go with vocabulary for 1,000, please, Chenix. You're trying to get salty, dog. Yeah, yeah. Whoever got it, even if they get it wrong, they just go again. Vocabulary for 1,000 for Theo. I like how you guys are picking the real tough ones and not doing the ones that would be fun. Oh, this is good.

It's the correct name for a person who eats fish but palates their meats. Pescatarian. We got it. It was Theo. Oh, I hit it. Nope, I hit it. No. Yeah, that was first. No, I hit it. Nope, I hit it. No. Yeah, that was first.

No, this was first. I think Chappelle is the impartial judge on this. But first of all, Brendan's supposed to have points because he got one right. All right. He got the dodgeball. Got 400. This is smooth. I'm going to go with pescatarian.

That's correct. Theo for 1,000. Unbelievable. You fucked me for 1,000. Unbelievable. You fucked me, Chappelle. No, I didn't. I heard it first. Honesty wins always, Brendan.

Honesty. Haven't you seen a lot of different movies that are about that? Your pick, Doug. Yeah, I will pick. And I want that G, Doug. Thank you. Who makes it for 400, please, Chinning? Who makes it for 400? The Kind? Who makes it for $400?

The Kindle Paperwhite e-reader. Who is Amazon? She got it. Correct. Wow. Kat for $400. Who makes the Kindle, basically? You're losing, Brendan.

Well, no, I got $1,000, but Chappelle cheated me out of it. Who makes it is the easiest category. You're losing, buddy. Go ahead, Kat. Let's do... Who makes it for 800? Who makes it for 800? Galaxy tablets. Samsung.

Correct. Brendan for 800. I'm going to suck these nuts, Theo. When did Jeopardy become so intense who makes it who makes it 1000 you look like an acorn that got a job at a feed and see calm the fuck down who makes it 1000 we're gonna we'll do in a second but make sure to answer in the question form good job what is What is Samsung? Yeah, correct. All right.

So who makes it 1,000? Crackle candy bars. Nestle. I'm sorry. How do you say this? What is Nestle, Alec? Incorrect for 1,000. What is Hershey's?

Correct. Yeah. 1,000 for Brendan Shaw. The mad nose candy. I thought Nestle too. Give me some of that candy, please, Kat. Yeah. 1,000 for Brendan Schraub. The mad nose candy. I thought Nestle, too. Give me some of that candy, please, Kat. That Bratches. I want that Bratches. I'll take who makes it 600, Chin.

Who makes it 600 for Brendan Schraub? Thank you. Dog Chow and Cat Chow. Purina. Correct. Damn. I said correct. What is Purina?

Her correct for 600. Who makes it 200? God damn. You sad. You know what cats eat. You sad, boy. You know what cats eat, bro. You a pervert, dog.

Who makes it $200? You a pervert, bro. You too, dog. What did I do? You too, you fucking snuff man. For $200. You look like a fucking bro. Air Pegasus sneakers.

What is Nike? Code Rush for $200. Swept the category. Oh my God, this is a sneak. Y'all loaded this thing up, man. And you know what cats eat. You nasty, bro. All right, we're going to take a break.

We're going to take our first commercial break and come back and learn a little bit about our contestants. Yeah, fuck you, hoes. you hoes damn get out of here jeopardy is ratchet now wow ratchet yeah i want alex back man look it's that time of year where you you can get something nice for somebody and a lot of you ladies and even men and gay men you may have a problem with hair on your body or hair on a friend's body. How about our producer, Nick? He could trim the freaking hair on his forearms.

He knows he's wearing a tank top. I've given him some Manscaped stuff, I think. Well, it ain't working. Well, look, I can't pin him down. You can't, man. Whether it's the weed whacker. How about the performance package? The lawnmower.

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That's 20% off with free shipping. Manscaped.com. Use code Kingsting. Be sure to join the Manscaped movement. These products are no joke. You know my thick ass always on a diet? Yeah, I've heard. I know.

I'm sure you've heard. I like to tell people on a diet. You know, when people on a diet, first thing they say is, I'm on a diet. They want everybody to know i'm sure you've heard i like to tell people on a diet you know when people on a diet first thing they say is i'm on a diet they want everybody to know i know here's the problem dude you can't get enough greens do you have i don't know some like cool powder or something i could put in to water get my greens dude don't ask me for powder bro i have to call my sponsor okay what i'm talking about is athletic greens, guys. That's your solution, man. With as many as 75 vitamins, minerals, whole source ingredients, you'll be hard-pressed to find a more nutrient-dense formula on the market. Multivitamins, multiminerals, green complex, probiotic, prebiotic, gut health.

You can do it. You can do it. You're talking about that multivitamin that goes the extra mile, man. They got it all. Immune system support, gut health support, daily nutrition habit. All right? Makes you feel so healthy you'd drink your own damn blood, man, if you could. Not all vitamins are created equal. Athletic greens invest in its ingredients so you can invest in your health.

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Get healthy, Athletic Greens. Ed, we're back. Oh, so this is when I ask him. He looks over here pounding Monster Energy. Well, guys. Alex wouldn't do that. Yeah, he wouldn't do that. There's no bang at the gas station I went to today.

Why is Jen dressed up so nice and Nick Bucket shows up? Dressed up like a concierge at a Lost and Found, dude. Tighten it up. We haven't seen your blue shirt. I don't know what you're talking about. You look like security at Goodwill, Nick. Tighten it up. We haven't seen your blue shirt. I don't know what you're talking about. You're like security at Goodwill now. Yeah, these vases are two for one.

Goodwill always has the weirdest shit. You can get one size 12 and one size 13. But they always have those glass cases with the weirdest shit. The weirdest shit. It'll have like a swastika in there how much for that all right so uh brendan's in the lead so let's get to know brendan a little bit more uh is there a story when you were younger i wouldn't suggest it friend of yours was having sex with a female and you tried to intervene to join as well. Can you tell us a little bit about that story? In this climate, Jim? This Jeopardy is wacky. Jeez, man.

You're trying to get me kicked off this show because I'm dominating. I see what the fuck's going on here. This is Jeopardy brought to you by, what is it? Worldstar.

Ryan Allen. Shin, don't ask that kind of stuff, Shin. You're a disgusting host. Honor Alec. I'm going to say it. Honor Alec. kind of stuff, Shin. You're a disgusting host. Honor Alec. I'm going to understand. Honor Alec. Honor Alec.

Okay. Brendan Schaaf, there's an iconic picture of you as a French robot. Can you tell us a little bit more about that story? How did that come to be? When I was a kid, my mom made a costume of a robot. I had her drawn a mustache. I looked French. I handed out the croissants. Fascinating. I had her draw on a mustache. I looked French. I handed out the croissants.

Fascinating. I don't know. I want to go to the store better. Moving on. Kat? What? It's my pick. You asked a little anecdote about Alva.

Kat didn't lose her virginity until college, I don't think, right? No, I lost my virginity when I was like 14, 15. Oh, yum. Yum. What? Yum. What? Keep it moving, Allie.

Apparently, everyone wants to see your feet. Is there a certain number that would allow anyone to see your feet? Yes, absolutely. Can you tell us that number? Throw the number around. Put it in my PayPal. How about three grand? Three grand? Nah. Bro, you gotta start a little lower than that.

Well, that's how much money I have. That's all we got. Started 600, You delinquent Brendan's like True Daily Double Alex Yeah Nah Not for three grand

Ten grand Uh Ten grand Yes Come on Kat Ten grand Just to post a picture of your feet Ten grand's good

Ten grand is pretty good I think if it's One of those situations Where like If it's an OnlyFans Where like you pay For that like Pay-per-view thing,

then sure, why not? All right. Damn. All right. All right. Chappelle Lacey, you love white music. If you could be reborn, would you be reborn? Whoa, dude.

What is white music? White music and senior citizen laughter as well. Why are we also asking an anecdote from the announcer? I know, right? I'm just getting the shit. I'm fired, dude. That's why you he got the show. We're on fire, dude. That's why you work on this shitty show. We want Alex back.

Yeah, who fucking wrote these questions? That's why you work on this shitty show instead of Jeopardy, dude. A white musician or yourself, what would you do? Oh, myself all the way. All right. Yeah. He laughs like the Hamburglar. Let's do it.

No, you got Theo. Keep going? Yeah. Now it's Theo's question. We know everything about him. Do we? I don't know. Do we?

Let's hit it. These are good. Okay. Theo Vaughn, you're from New Orleans? Yep. When did you lose your virginity? What? Anywhere from 14 to 17.

And it was outdoors, yeah. It was outdoors. Oh, and they were throwing rocks at you outdoors yeah it was outdoors oh and they were throwing rocks at you but it was near indoors they were throwing rocks at him yeah very middle eastern

are you still afraid of rocks now like hearing things break I've never liked people throwing rocks at me I also don't enjoy that some people might be

into it I'm not into it that much did we do you Nick or no enjoy people throwing rocks at you no no no

did we do a question with you as well no no just a contest I can't wait to see these Jeopardy fucking comment section Enjoy people throwing racks at you? No, no, no. Do we do a question with you as well? No, no. Just a contest. All right. I can't wait to see these Jeopardy fucking comment section. It's probably like firing the kid. We want Alex back.

Well, at least we are all together. Yeah. Brendan Stern. I will take in a- Brendan's 3,000? Yeah. I will take- I swept that category, Doug. I will take... Brendan is 3,000? Yeah. I will take... I swept that category, Doug. I will take college educated.

I will take in a group, 600. In a group, 600 for Brendan. Beyonce used to be... That's me hitting that. That's Kat. No, that's me. Oh, okay. Destiny's Child.

Use the top row, but yeah. Destiny's Child. In the form of a question, please. What is Destiny's Child? Got it. Correct. For $600. And the party is jumping. Jumping. Jumping.

Brandon. In a group, $800. In a group, $800. Justin Timberlake used to be in a group. NSYNC. I hit it. I got it first. No, I did this one. Who is NSYNC? I hit it. I got it first. I got it. No, I did this one. That was first. Okay, well, Kat for 800.

Who is NSYNC? Come on, man. Wow, Kat's doing good. She got it. He gets so mad. All right. Let's do in a group for 1,000. For songs like Hall of Fame and Superheroes, stick to this band Danny O'Donoghue is in.

Who the hell? Who is it, Jin? The answer is The Script. Oh. I don't know. Go ahead, Kat. Let's do Schooling You for $800. Schooling You for $800.

Ooh, big money. Okay, big money, Daddy. Is it up there yet? Yep. All right. English. In the sentence, writing is difficult. Writing is the

six letter type of noun. Sorry. The correct answer is a gerund. A gerund. A gerund. A gerund. That's what I saw.

You're fa-eared. Which one was that? What number was it? Oh my God. That's what I saw. You're fa-eared. Oh my god. Okay, let's do Flora for 600. These people are ret-aireded. Here we go. The wood of choice for butcher blocks and bowling pins is this tree, whose leaves are seen here. Do you have the picture of the leaves?

What is pine? I'm going to say what is Here we go. Here we go. God damn it. God damn it. They should all get $600 for that. The picture one threw me off. Oh, God damn it. God damn it. This is smooth. They should all get $600 for that. The picture one threw me off.

It's all right. Nobody gets that one. Nobody gets that one. I don't think anyone's really winning here. I know. We're all losers. Who's Flora? Flowers, trees, and shit.

Like nature? Yeah. Oh, I thought it was a woman. Okay, let's do that for $1,000 then. Gotta miss Alex. I'm schooling you for $1,000. It know. Oh. Okay, let's do that for a thousand then. Gotta miss Alex. Schooling you for a thousand. It's Alec. Is it Alex?

It's Alec, isn't it? Is it Alex? I think it's Alex. Fahrenheit. What? What is Fahrenheit? That is different. What is degrees?

This is awesome. Bro, is this? It's like music. What it, oh. Well, it's already taken. Music, bro. Is this... It's like music. What it... Oh. Music, take a break. What? Throw in your two bits and name this music symbol. Let's see the symbol.

We gotta skip this one because I don't have the fuck... Let's move to Double Jeopardy, huh? Double Jeopardy. Who picked it? Who picked it? Huh? Who picked Double Jeopardy? Oh, no.opardy. Who picked it? Who picked it? Huh? Who picked Double Jeopardy? Oh, no.

It's not Daily Double. We're on to the next round. Oh, I'm up. Reality TV Shows, 200. Let's do it. Reality TV Shows, 200. There it goes. And they don't exist.

Double. When you pick one, just say double. Okay. Okay, 400. Reality TV Shows, double. Double. For 400 Okay

The Bravo channel Has introduced us To the real Who was it? Me The Bravo channel Introduces us To the real

Housewives Correct 400 for Give me that bag Son There you go Theo's got some points We're going hard now

Did you have a pen pal Off the real housewives? Yeah he dated one Dated one? I was hard now. Didn't you have a pen pal off the Real Housewives? Yeah, he dated one. Dated one? I was trying to be cool, man. So I said pen pal. It was all over the rags. I met one online.

He said I met one online. Good for you. You, Theo. I used to work with them. You did? Yeah, for Bravo. I wouldn't say you worked with them, did you? Yeah, they were on the show.

What about Vicky Barbalack? That's my... Oh, I love Vicky. That's that dime, baby. That thicky, thicky. Yeah, they all got... She was on the reality show? They all got Hausers on them, too.

Vicky Barbalack, yeah. Was she really? I thought she was straight up comedy. So was Nene. Vicky Barbalack? No, you're thinking of Nene Leakes. No, Vicky Barbalack's a comedian. Oh, she is?

Oh, never mind. I'm thinking about Vicky. Yeah, Vicky. What's her name? Facelift Vicky. Vicky Grundberlack's a comedian. Oh, she is? Oh, never mind. I'm thinking about Vicky. Yeah, Vicky. What's her name? Facelift Vicky. Vicky Grundleson. Vicky Grundleson, yeah. Mop Face Vicky.

Yeah. Let's hear another one from Let's Travel for 800. Let's Travel for 800. So this is a double. So that would be? A daily double. He got a daily double. Bring that heat, fam.

I'd like to wager it all, please. You can go up to $2,000 since you don't have it since you don't have that much yet. Okay. I'm going to wager $600, please. Visitors to this inventor's New Jersey lab can hear recordings from his 1890 taking doll,

a costly failure. It's a talking doll. Thank you very much, Chappelle. Jesus Christ. I'm going to go with Benjamin Franklin. Incorrect. Fine. Edison. He said fine.

Do you guys know? No one else? Thomas Edison. No one else can jump in on a daily double. Oh, got it. It's still Theo. I'm going to go with I'm like on page one. What the hell is this?

Which I'm sure is what the listeners are thinking during this game. I'm going to go with four for 400, please. Thank you, guys. I don't feel like going into it. It says Holden Caulfield on page one of this book. We're off to a great start. What is Catcher in the Rye? She got it.

Correct for $400, Kat. I can't believe you guys were doing better when that dog farted in there. It was a lot more fun when the dog farted in there. Let's do on my reading list for 800. On my reading list for 800. On my reading list for 800. Check out the big brain on cat. So it's actually 1600.

Here we go. A CD of the 1777 Oboe concert. Mozart. What is Mozart? Who is Mozart? Correct. Oh, wow. Gang, bro.

Name another composer. I'm going to go with taking a new SAT for 800. For 1,600, please, Alex. 1,600. To be labeled free of this type of fat, a food must contain less than. Brendan, right? No, it's Kat. Kat.

What is. Saturated. Nice. I'm incorrect for $1,600. Oh, that's the worst. All right. I'll do reality TV shows, $800. I'll say $1,600.

Reality shows on this cable channel have included Bad Dog, Snake Man, and Appalachia. Snake Man of Appalachia. Snake Man of Appalachia. Snake Man of Appalachia. What is Animal Planet? Correct for $1,600, Kat. She needed it. I did. I did need it.

Let's do Middle Initials for $600. This Empire actress, Middle Initial P, stands for Penda, Swahili for love. Her first name means hope. Who is Taraji P. Henson? Damn. Correct. For $1,200. Damn. Culture.

Alright, time for Final Jeopardy. Alright, let's get into it. Now we write it down on the piece of paper, right? Yes, and your wager. You can wager zero. You lose whatever your wager. So, like, you can wager zero. You lose whatever you wager.

So, like, Theo, or you could put zero, wager zero, and still be ahead. This is more for Kat. So there's some strategy to how much you wager. It's whoever ends up at the end with the most. Got it. And currently you have $3,600. Wager it all. Fuck it. You got to write00 wager it all fuck it

you gotta write it down don't spoil it I'm glad I did not play this game really? this is my first time ever seeing a full game of Jeopardy

through and through yeah Jeopardy's pretty cool this is exactly like it it's uh it's just like this I feel so smart when I get like three in a row

around my girl She's all dang That's right bitch But then you only get three for the whole night It's fucking tough You gotta DVR the one from the day before And then put it on Just blow her mind

Alright Alright Is this the actual question from The Real Jeopardy? Yeah, it was. I think you guys can get it. All right, be cool, Nick. This practice officially began in Pakistan in 1977, 44 years after an amendment ended in the United States.

This practice officially began in Pakistan in 1977. It ended in the United States. I'm glad they do this music. This practice officially began in Pakistan in 1977. Just practice. Just practice. Just practice. Just practice. Just practice.

Just practice. Just practice. Just practice. Just practice. Just practice. Just practice. Just practice. Just practice.

Just practice. Just practice. Just practice. Just practice. Just practice. Just practice. Just practice. Okay. And then remember, Chin has to read our answer. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, we don't read it. I feel like everybody's going to have the same answer.

Really? Does anyone go first or we just go down the line? You pick with the lowest, so go Theo, Kat, me. Correct. Theo, Kat, and then Brendan. Okay. All right. Theo, you can take this.

Do we need to repeat this again? No, I can't, dude. Okay. You haven't seen this answer. So Theo is in third with 2,200, and his answer was, Chin, you got to read it. Theo. What is public executions for $1,400? Incorrect.

Incorrect. Fuck y'all, man. Ooh, that's a good throw. Fuck y'all. Sorry. Cat's turn. Cat. Y'all are haters, dude.

For $3,600, what is waterboarding? Incorrect. How much did she bet? All of it. For Brendan Schaub, $200, what is these juicy nuts? Also incorrect, but I think Brendan gets it. Brendan wins. What's the answer to that?

It is prohibition. Good one. Oh. Prohibition? I just wanted to hear Chin say these juicy nuts. I said it. I was hoping all three of you would write smoke my natch, fam. I thought it was hanging, man.

Public execution, man. That's not about you. You told us. What was it, Chin? Prohibition? Dude, yeah, because you can't just... Some people have to die, man. Yeah. I hate to say that, but it's like you can't have everybody stay around. How about when I was in Phoenix?

You know how they have all the biggest comedians on the walls? They get your big ass up there. Crazy, Doug. Crazy. Proud of you, Doug. That's how they do it. Thanks, bro. That's how they did it, huh?

That's how they do it. I sent a picture, and I put everybody's favorite on made the wall i posted it too yeah thank you guys on your instagram it's you in my story spade a few days ago though michelle wuff eliza wow joe coy's up there joe coy kevin hart dog i sent you you that. You're the only one who did this. I sent this thing. It goes, Pence. No, I didn't. I sent a text.

It said. Why is this playing? I'm going to send this to Nick. Theo's the only friend I have who figured this shit out. Oh, yeah. Because I sent a text. It says, dude, breaking news. Pence.

It said, Trump's stepping down. Pence is going to step in. This is crazy. Here it is. I'm sending it to you right now, Nick. So it says, the text says, shit's getting weird, man. It looks like a straight link from a news outlet. It says, VP Mike Pence to be sworn in as acting president.

White House officials say, President Trump to resign at midnight tonight. Click on the link. Source, Reuters via PBS. will say president trump to resign at midnight tonight click on the link source rooters via pbs and then i sent it to the only but not click on it probably gay but you click on it and it's the biggest black dick you've ever seen in your life why do you have to see it again well you're the only one who got that right the rest of my friends uh i got it right no i sent the group chat and then you got it no i said i will, I said I will not hit that link. So everyone else saw it?

Yeah, I knew exactly what he was doing. I ain't dumb. I ain't seeing it. But the reason I'm saying it, I was like, why am I telling this story? Oh, I sent it to Joe Coy. Joe Coy. He goes, damn, what? I go, dude, click on the link.

It's nuts. Read it. And then he FaceTimed me. He goes, dude, what the fuck? Manning showed up. That big ham. It's nuts. Read it. And then he FaceTimed me. He goes, dude, what the fuck? Manning showed up. That big ham. Everybody's seen that guy. I mean.

He passed away. Yeah, may he rest in peace. Yeah, he passed away. He passed away. We talked about that a year ago. Is he back all of a sudden? That was the picture of him again? That was the picture, yeah.

You didn't even click on it. You're smart. But Joe Coy goes, dude, I'm with my dad. And he FaceTimed me and shows his dad. And his dad was like this. I'm with my dad. He's FaceTiming and shows his dad. His dad was like this.

Theo probably tried to click on it, but his phone wouldn't allow it. That's a good point, too. I think Theo was savvy to it, though. My dad came. Your dad came through, huh? Looking fresh, bro. Everyone thought it was Cedric the Entertainer. Oh, I could see that. With the Gucci shoes, man.

Steve-O came through. Your boy, Steve-o steve-o came through too came through his closing bit was him jacking off out of a plane yeah it was pretty crazy did he really do that a screen came down and he goes check out my closer and tim jumping out playing jacking off busting a nut big load he did it big load yeah you see how much it was yeah you can see can see it. That's disgusting. And does it like fall with him? Yes. No, it gets taken off into the plane. Oh, I see what you're saying.

Yeah, I know. And Triple C came out? What? And Triple C came out? Yeah. Bend the knee? Bend the knee. Wow.

What did he do? Ate all the candy. How about Rob Mack? Did he really? Yeah. How about Rob Mack? And how big is he? How big is he, Chappelle? Oh, he's short, dog. Cat's bigger than he is.

No! Yeah, I've been at Malka while he was there. He's smaller. He's a lot smaller than I thought he'd be. A lot smaller than I actually thought, too. What? He ate all the candy in the green room, and then his cousin, who's supposedly a freestyle rapper,

not a rapper, but he tried. How about Rob McElhenney goes, His cousin, who's supposedly a freestyle rapper. Not a rapper. Not a rapper. But he tried. He did his best. How about Rob McElhaney goes, who wins that fight if it happens today in that room? What's wrong with Rob? Who would win that fight?

Probably him, you think? Because you have weight and size on him. I have 100 pounds on him. So how much does that come into play in a fight? It's tough because if it was just like a normal, like say my brother who probably has 100 pounds on him. Well, my brother doesn't know jiu-jitsu or wrestling or striking. Or tanning at all if you've seen him recently.

That's very true. That's very true. Getting very white. Very, very white. We get him in the back. Oh, yeah. Actually, there's a filter on that one. Yeah. Is there? He's still pretty pale. Yeah, very white. We get them in the back. Oh yeah. Actually, there's a filter on that one.

Yeah. Is there? But Jay is still pretty pale. Yeah, he's pretty pale. No, not a lot of pictures of Jay on there. Oh,

there's, who came in on the right? No, right? Oh, Corey Sanahe. Yeah. That one just dropped.

He's great. You know, he came into my gym when he was 16. No way. into my gym when he was 16. No way. I met him when he was a 16 basketball player. What was he like? He was just young as fuck.

Lost a lot of money out of his last two fights. I bet on him against Aljo, and then I bet against him against Marais. That's what you get. Glover blew it up, too, this week. Glover's a man. Yeah, Glover crushed it. By sub plus 550. Oh, who'd you take?

Glover by sub. Oh, yeah. It saved my night because it was just even otherwise. Good times. It was a great fight. Those are great fights. Did you make a lot of money? Glover's a legend, man.

He's 5,500 on that one. Damn. It's unbelievable what he's doing. He's 41 years old or some shit like that? Yeah, he's crushing it. Yeah. Yeah, Corey's freaking a legend, man. That's dope.

Yeah, Corey's great. So who won? Kat won? No, I think Brendan won. Brendan won. Jeopardy champion. With the Juicy Nuts. Keep touching me, bro.

Now let's get whoa Vicky in here to do the Jeopardy. See what's up. Whoa, Vicky. I wonder what she's like, do you think? I feel like she'd be good at Jeopardy. Ooh, I up. Whoa, Vicky. I wonder what she's like, do you think? I feel like she'd be good at Jeopardy. Ooh, I beg to differ.

You beg to differ? I feel like she watches a lot of Jeopardy. That may be the one thing she's like. Whoa, Vicky would be the best game show contestant. I agree. I think she'd be very entertaining. Yeah. I think she's going to win Jeopardy. Oh, I didn't say she would win. I said she'd be good at it. Let's see if we can find a video of war biggie just so the the the fans know what she's like

and what her vibe is like a youtube video uh just even one of her songs she had a she had a uh diss track against some guy she raps china boy uh chinese uh is she good at rapping right there right ooh diss track there's a oh I know the Asian guy you're talking about I know this guy's good wait she hated Asian guy of course you guys do we have to that guy's such a good actor worst actor ever I go to the skate park where's that definitely racist.

But what does ching chong mean? That's what white people used to say when Asians came over here. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. Someone raised that you had a little... Is she reading off a teleprompter? Whatever she's doing is probably bad. She's like this, okay, okay, okay. Ching, Chong, Ching.

But at least you know where she's coming from, dog. I don't. Not really, dog. I don't know what's going on. It's not like she's reading off a teleprompter. You know my brother's name is Chong and mine is Chin? Oh, damn. It was like the worst.

Ching, Chong, Ching, Chong, Ching, Chong. Really? was growing up it was like the worst ching chong ching chong ching chong yeah really you can tell it was triggering for chin i saw it in his face why would somebody name y'all ching chong i named myself which is stupid but yeah you name yourself chin i changed it to chin because all my friends said chin or jim what a lot of asian women named gladys older ones or sally yeah that's fair or karen hey what but your parents gave you what name what j-i-n jim jim jim and my brother's name is jong jim jong we changed it jim jong why would you change it to something completely different? Like Hank or Alistair. Lewis. Alistair.

Yeah, dog. You went, oh, Jin, I'm going to change it to Chin. I know. Jin's Chinese. It's not even Korean. Bro, you should have changed it to anything, man. Scott. You know?

Patrick. The world is yours, man. Whatever you want. Henry. The Rock. The Rock Yi. Yeah. I was thinking about Slater.

Slater Yi. It could have been Ty Yeah. I was thinking about Slater. Slater Yee. It could have been Tyrone. Tyrone. Slater. You could have been S.C. Slater. Slater. Dude, I could see you being S.C. Slater, man. Dude, do you want to change your name to Slater?

Do you want to start calling you Slater? No, but Jin's good. My real name. Jin is a good name, man. He's like, how about you call me by a real fucking name called Jin, okay? Jin Su. Jin Su. Jin Su.

Yeah, they always say the first and middle name. When did you change your name? When I was 18, I got nationalized as a citizen. Now, if you're from another country and you go to a per... Who picks out y'all's names? Because a lot of people, it's like five or six names that a lot of Asian people sometimes have. Oh, you give it to yourself. No way.

Yeah, you get to choose. Is there a chart or anything you pick off of? No, usually you go by the most common name that you hear. Somebody told my mom that she reminded her of Aubrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany's so she went by Tiffany ever since. It's usually what

other people say you think you look like. Other Americans are like, you look like a Danny. You're like, cool, I'm Danny. Hot Tiff. I'd be Steve. Hot Tiff in the streets. That's pretty dope. I'd be Big Bob. Fat Patrick. I'm Steve. You gave me cash.

Calm down, bro. Damn. I gave you cash. Yeah, but you gave me cash. Bro, this is a joke, dude. He's about to fight you, dog. Hey, do you feel pressure, though, next week? Huh?

Do you feel pressure next week? For what? I'm in Nashville and you got to take me around town. Oh, yeah. You got to show me all the sights and sounds. were my pass if I were my passenger seat I would feel pressure but I think I'll be fine you know any good food spots you know more than I do live there though you're local sites to see Brenda yes sir it's

Nashville let me think about it the Chicken. Hattie B's. We'll go to Hattie B's. Yeah, we'll get some lunch. Chandler said he has the hookup at Hattie B's. He does? What, at Hattie B's? You got to come over to the MMA gym, man. Watch me roll one day. Yeah, is that Big Gene?

Hey, Big Gene, you're on the clock, bitch. Yeah. And Big Tim, this big tall guy, really. Tim gives me proms, too? Yeah. This fucking dude has power lines coming into him. He's tall. Let's see what's up has power lines coming into him. He's tall. Let's see what's up.

I'll go in there. He's got birds landing on him and shit. You'll talk to him, a bird will just come and land on him. He's real tall. You point him out. Oh, yeah. You point him out. And you take him down.

Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck. I like that. Definitely. Bring that henchman in. I've never been to Nashville. You haven't? No. It's a great city.

It'll be fun. I don't know what... Miley Cyrus all up around the videos. Tell her to come see what's up. Miley Cyrus is there. Miley Cyrus. Is she going to come to the shows? Great food, I'm sure.

Come in like a wrecking ball. Dolly Parton's out there, right? Ooh, the original titter hitter. Yeah. Beth is just a product of them big tits but beth had those tits that just here's my thing yeah beth tits that keep on giving dude her tits were like a slip and slide dog do you think you can handle something like that no no no no yeah i can't all that kind of stuff man i don't know you have to have that tricep and you have that confidence yeah yeah

i don't have i don't have the confidence either. Is Dolly Parton's titties real? No. No, can't be, right? It doesn't seem like it, but a lot of people used to marvel at them because they thought they were real. I don't know if that's like a... Has she had them forever?

Yeah, she's had big tits forever. She's notoriously known for having big tits. She got the early, early ones. They had like oil in them. So when did people start getting fake titties though? I don't know when they started, but it got better within the early, early ones that had like oil in them. So when did people start getting fake titties though? I don't know when they started, but it got better within the last, I'd say like eight years. Yeah, the early ones were very, see like square one. Like it was way rock.

They were like really hard. Oh, got it. They didn't balance properly. Silicone breast implant, 1962. Damn, what kind? Oh, she might have gotten the first one. What kind of hoe in 1962 is getting some titties? A real hoe.

Why would it be a real one? I'll tell you this, a hoe with a man, that's who. Yeah, Playboy was around and shit. But they got hard, though. Some of the old ones, they would get hard. You could even thump them. You could flick them and they'd make a sound.

Not the best Chapmans, though. But you had to go to Germany, Spain, France, Austria to get them. Really? Oh, you can do it in the States. Now LA has the best ones. And Mexico. Mexico. Mexico.

For real? Oh, yeah. A lot of people go. Because a lot of doctors, they go down there because they don't have the same licensing. But it's like half the price. And they're just cranking it out. Damn. Real hot tits

damn why you gotta say that you talked on your girl a fake ass some tits holla i don't know who would want a fake ass that what if it doesn't settle right though you think having a fake ass yeah it seems like so much fun thought okay yeah you're turning into a thot, Kat. Yeah, that's the point. It sounds like fun. Yeah, it sounds dope. But they don't put ass implants in. They take the fat out of your stomach or other areas. So it's your body. And they put the fat into your ass. And when they just put the fat in your ass, you think you would like it, Kat?

I don't know if I would like it, but I think it'd be fun. Yeah. Like for a couple months and then just like walk around with a ridiculous ass. Hating it. Do they have like Botox for your butt? Oh, yeah. They do? Oh, Do they have like Botox for your butt? Oh yeah. They do? They have what? Botox for your butt? To smooth it out? If you have them dimples.

Do we have that, Nick? Botox for your butt? Can you just look that up? Someone should do it for Lizzo. Have you seen her new post? You still follow Lizzo? Chappelle knows what I'm talking about. Yeah, you can. To treat sweaty butts.

Oh. My brother might need that. He has that little wet duck tail all the time out the back. Oh, really? Yeah, his booty's always wet. We should call that duck butt. That swampy dumper, dog. Not me, man.

My butt's dry as can be. You could grow a cactus on my butt. A snake could live man my butt's dry as can be yeah you could grow a cactus on my butt a snake could live on my butt show that lizzo yeah bring up lizzo's last instagram post oh the one where she's turning around though you know oh the other one right there yeah there's one where she's dancing yeah whoo shody got back that's's a good way of putting it, Brendan. Woo, woo, woo, woo. Welcome to the pudding shop. She's the dick.

Hey, there's another one. Close that one. I think there's a video. Right there. Oh, that's a video. Yeah, that's what you want. Dang, show that work. Looks like Rikishi.

Rikishi in wrestling? Old reference. Kamala. What was that? Kamala Rikishi in wrestling? Old reference. Kamala Harris. What was that? Kamala, what's his name? Just Kamala. Kamala. Whose name was actually Kamala Harris. How crazy is that? Yeah. She's living her best life. Yeah, man. She's out there.

How long are we going to pretend she doesn't have diabetes? In the sun. How are we just going to pretend that that's all good? She might. Yeah. She may have it. She might. She might. Ooh, good call. Who called that? Nick?

No, no, that was Nick. No, she doesn't look like Kamala. That was Rikishi. I thought from the back she could have that Kamala vibe. Remember Yokozuna? That was his finishing move. Put his ass in your face. Yeah, there it is.

That's Rikishi, but yeah, similar, similar move. That motherfucker in the thong. Who is that, Rikishi? Yeah. Wasn't he related to The Rock? I don't know. Might have been his dad. Yeah.

Oh, this video game. All right. Well, I'm in Nashville next week, Thursday, Friday, Saturday. All shows almost sold out. We just had a second show to Thursday. Really? Yep. You're doing two Thursday, two Friday, two Saturday?

Yeah, dog. Wow. I want my brother from another mother to come on through. Wow, man. Come on through. I'll see what I have going on, man. Let me look at your schedule. Right open.

It'll be fun. Oh, no. It'll be fun, man. Please come. I'm at least going to buy a ticket, man. I promise you guys that. Hell no. He won't come, but he'll buy a ticket.

We'll be able to get one, man. We'll see. That'd be funny if he hit you up to ask for it. Hey, Brandon, can I get a ticket, dog? Is anything worse? Theo bought the first five rows, so it's going to be empty. Or Brandon, like 50 to 10. Didn't 50 Cent do that to Ja Rule?

Yeah, he did. He bought like 1,000 tickets, so it looked empty. That's crazy. Ja Rule's still getting paid. He's like, all right, that's cool. That's crazy. John Rowe's still getting paid. He's like, all right, that's cool. This is really funny. That would be awkward, though. That would be the worst.

It'd be funny, though. Yeah, it'd be funny. Super funny. Chin and Kat, you're both going? Yeah. Y'all are going to Nashville? You're the only one not going, Nick. How do you feel?

I might still. Fun. Yeah, I think I might. My girlfriend got off for it. Yeah. My girl might come too. I'm sure. Nice.

I'm sure King of Sting could cover your travel. That's what I was waiting for. I'll be there. I knew it. I knew it. Suave move by both of you guys. Now, you might fly in spare air, but whatever. That's fine.

That's fine. Dude, be careful. They have dog fights on those flights. And cock fights, which I'm kind of into. Nick is going to bring his dog. Yeah, or just bet on him. You know? Yeah, don't bring that little fucking mutt, though, man.

Yeah, we'll have to find a home for him. Guadalupe, what's his name again? Yeah, Guadalupe. Guadalupe. Yeah, he keeps getting passed on. All right, guys. Thanks for supporting the podcast. Love you guys.

We'll see you guys next week. We're going to do our best to have Woe Vicky in here. Something close. Yeah, go tell Woe Vicky to come on. Something close. Something of the sort. Oh, my God. Brennan and Theo, fighter in weight.

I got to go in and go hard in the paint. I do not think. I am in flow. Black rifle coffee, I'm ready to go. I need a sponsor. I am a monster. About to open up with this at my concert. Flow is contagious. Brows are outrageous. Thicker than girls' letter. I need a sponsor. I am a monster about to open up with this at my concerts flow is contagious browser Outrageous thicker than girls that are Instagram famous damn hungry like I'm fresh off keto seeing red like Andrew Santino

Every song I hit like the great Bambino Brennan ate the queso and the quesoritos, but everything's gonna be fine Hate on me. I do not mind Feel looking like the type of dude that got a pack of matches in his pockets at all times I do not mind. Theo looking like the type of dude that got a pack of matches in his pockets at all times. They sliding into my DMs. A couple of you tried but couldn't beat him. Quit playing like Nintendo DS.

You don't want to smoke like Joey Diaz. Meaning y'all edible. Just got my eyebrows threaded and I'm feeling incredible. Brandon's son hit me up. He said it's too loud in the club. Can you pick me up? King and the sting. King and the sting.

King and the sting. We sting. Rat king. King in the sting, king in the sting, king in the sting, bee sting rat king, king in the sting, king in the sting, got the bees in the trap, got the cheese on a string, king in the sting, king in the sting, king in the sting, bee sting rat king, king in the sting, king in the sting, bee sting, rat king King and the sting, king and the sting Got the bees in a trap, got the cheese on a string