The Golden Hour - Fever Dreams | The Golden Hour #73 w/ Brendan Schaub, Erik Griffin & Chris D'Elia
Episode Date: March 29, 2024The guys talk Chris' fever making him delirious, P Diddy's house getting raided, singer Cassie following producer Nick on social media, Chris discovering when he started looking good, their favorite B...atman actors, advice for a pregnant woman and much more! Get two extra episodes every month at https://patreon.com/thegoldenhourpodcast DraftKings - Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app and use code GOLDEN
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We're friends that laugh, we're friends that shout
Sometimes we don't know what we're talking about
But that won't stop us
Nothing can stop us
Ooh, yeah
It's like a show you used to love
Just rebranded enough
It's stronger, better, bigger power
Cause it is the Golden Hour
It's the Golden Hour
How are you feeling, Chris?
I'm alright.
I'm not better, but I'm getting better.
It's so funny.
Rachel said to me,
I saw Chris' story and he's sick,
so make sure you...
Yeah.
You were saying you're sick?
I don't think you can catch it from me.
It was a while ago.
It was like I started feeling it.
I'm not a bitch about it either.
Yeah, I don't think you can get it
from me anymore.
I don't care.
I know, but you care if you have a kid.
I have kids.
I know, but he's...
I got a baby.
Same age dog.
Yeah, true.
You know I'm not...
No, but I started...
Did you see that Andrew Tate thing?
Andrew Tate is like, I don't date women that have been vaccinated.
Yeah.
Love it.
Love it.
Love it.
Do you see that actor?
You guys would know the old school actor.
He was on Tombstone.
He's on Yellowstone.
Sam.
I know everybody with the movie Stone.
Sam Elliott.
Elliott Stone.
He was on a flight and a lady had a mask on next to him.
And he caused some big uproar. Refused to fly next to the lady with the mask on.
They kicked him off the flight.
Listen, bro, I can't stand people with masks either.
It's an IQ test at this point.
But that's just dumb.
I need to get to my destination.
Yeah, what's wrong with him?
I don't give a fuck.
He sent me next to two people wearing masks.
Both drive Teslas.
I don't give a shit.
I'm just saying I had a fever for two days, 48 hours.
How high, though?
101.
It's all right. Not bad. Yeah, not bad. But, you days, 48 hours. How high, though? 101. It's all right.
Not bad.
Yeah, not bad.
But, you know, I have the different things, though.
Oh, yeah, I used the boop on the kids.
And one of them was 101.1, and one of them, and then the other one would be 100.3.
So I'm like, all right, take the middle.
So 106.7.
Do you know what I'm saying?
Like, they all say different shit.
Yeah.
Eric.
You're saying 100.6.
You okay?
Not 106. Yeah. 106, I mean, you'd have to shit. Yeah. Eric. You're saying 100.6. You okay? Not 106.
Yeah.
106, I mean, you'd have to go to the emergency room.
No, 106.
Oh, yeah.
106, you'd be dead.
This is 106.
Yeah, 106, trouble.
Dude, I had a fever.
I get delirious when I have a fever.
Even with just 100?
Yes.
Man.
Yes.
It's messing with your brain.
It's only two degrees, though.
That's a lot.
It's one and a half to be honest.
It's actually weird because it is only three.
Right?
Is it 98?
98.5.
That's three degrees or two degrees.
And, dude, I was in my bathroom, and Kristen was coming up to go to bed,
and I was getting ready for bed,
and I was singing some song that
i just made up like silly song and then i then i remixed it and made it a different way in my
just with my mind looks like i'm talented like that going to bed like that sure and then i go
like this man i really got it like that and i start laughing by myself i'm by myself laughing
hard i'm gonna laugh like man i really got it like that i start laughing and myself. I'm by myself. Laughing hard. I'm laughing like, man, I really got it like that.
I start laughing.
And then I'm like, fuck, is Kristen in the bedroom?
Can she hear me?
Like, that would be the most embarrassing thing I've ever been through.
And I was kind of hoping it happened, though, because I wanted her to know the real me while I was coming out.
I was going to say, do you think it's the fever?
Yeah.
I feel like this is you every night.
It is me.
Basically.
But it was me with some icing on it.
You know what I mean
The fever is the icing
A little sauce
Yeah
So I come out
And she wasn't there
But she was coming in the bedroom
And I was looking at her like
I was walking out like this
And she's like
What the fuck are you
Because I was like
I was walking out like this
She's like what are you doing
And I was like
Oh man
I kind of wish what you just heard me do
But you didn't
I didn't think you were in the room
But I can't believe what you
I wonder what you would have thought
She said what did you do So I sang the song for her again it was something
about chili beans and then I did a remix and the remix version for her chili beans and I said man
and then I said I really got it like that and she said oh my god and then and then we went to bed
and that's a bad story but it doesn't matter uh because you know because I'm delirious now so
you're delirious even now dude I am you're mad at us no I'm not mad I'm not mad I'm delirious now. You're delirious even now? Dude, I am. You're mad at us.
No, I'm not mad.
I'm not mad.
I'm just kind of fluid with it.
Dude, and I'll tell you what.
Now, when you get sick, is it because at our house, if one person gets sick, the whole house, everybody, get ready.
Get ready.
I'm always the last because my immune system is insane.
Crazy.
I think comics are like that.
You travel a lot.
You go on microphones.
I'm always the last.
You're around people.
I'm always the last. It's around people. I'm always the last.
It's the worst.
No, mine is always the quickest.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Mine was two days.
Same.
Cal had his nine days ago.
He's still like, what the heck's going on?
He's still sick?
Yep.
Our nanny still got it.
Your boy, though.
Your boy, young Chris.
Dude, young Chris.
Young Chris.
Sexy can I
Oh dude
How about
I wonder how much
I talked about this
Dude but how about
P. Diddy
House is rated
Both houses rated
The memes are hilarious
I have a friend
Who's involved with it
What do you mean
You have a friend
Who's involved with it
Friend who's involved
No he's friends with Mace
With
No with Someone who's doing the rating? No, he's friends with Mace.
No,
with someone who's doing the rating.
One of the guys doing the rating. Really?
Yeah. Oh, shit.
You've already said too much.
I mean, I'm not going to give you any details. Yeah, you will.
Off air, I will.
Until they put out that there's a warrant for his arrest
and he has to turn himself in, this is nothing.
Just wait. Okay. Oh, you think the feds raid two houses for the that there's a warrant for his arrest and he has to turn himself in this is nothing just wait okay
you think the feds raid two houses for the fucks of it no i'm just saying though they they're
raiding and he jumped on a plane a private plane you know i was thinking about this actually because
i was talking to somebody and they were saying they were saying does it mean you're guilty if you flee? And they were like,
the person I was talking to said,
dude, if I was innocent
and I felt like I was railroaded,
I would flee.
What ethnicity?
White.
Because the black guy would be like,
they're going to fuck me in court.
Yeah, of course.
Right, yeah.
But guys, he didn't go to a place. court. Yeah, of course. Right. Yeah. Right.
But guys, he didn't go to a place.
He went to a place that has extradition.
No, he didn't.
Yes, he did.
I thought it was no extradition.
No extradition.
No, no, no. No, I'm pretty sure.
No.
But what I read was no.
Nick's the ultimate source.
But what I read was no extradition.
And that's why I went there.
But I also read that it was fake news.
He might as well take her to Iowa then.
No, his plane.
He was in Miami. But his plane as well know that his plane he was
in miami but his plane went to that location but he was on the plane oh he's doing like when the
president comes out with the different would it look a lot i don't know where he went antigua
antigua is known as an extradition country oh so probably not the best place to flee if you're Diddy. Wow. Again, if you're saying he's fleeing.
Yeah, right.
I know.
He would go to a country that can't get extra.
That's what I'm trying to say.
Yeah, he may not.
If he didn't do that.
I'm just saying this is what he does, right?
Suge Knight.
Oh, this is a trustworthy source.
This is from prison, by the way.
People in the raids today wasn't for Diddy.
It was to destroy the incriminating stuff on powerful men.
What does that even mean? Like Jay-Z. Jay-Z's people were next but wait do you see the tweet about jay-z
it's hilarious they're like jay-z uh kills children i tweeted that yeah i looked and it
was brendan shop um it is interesting because the the big the reason the feds are on it i mean
obviously uh shook saying that but it's for Suge saying that, but it's for human trafficking.
It's for human trafficking.
Yeah, but by the way, if human trafficking is such a – what a loaded term that is.
Wide range.
I know.
Because, by the way, if he's on a plane and, say, someone underage was on the plane
and they travel, that's human trafficking.
Yep.
Yep.
I think it's trafficking if they're on a plane,
they fly somewhere and he fucks.
Right, right.
No, no, I know, but that is-
If he takes them to Disneyland,
that's not human trafficking.
That's not, yeah.
I know, I get that.
Well, he said just on a plane.
Oh.
No, no, no, but the thing is if you say- I don't know. What I'm saying is if you later, get that. Well, you said just on a plane. Oh. No, no, no, no. I need detail. No, no, no. But the thing is like if you say.
I don't know.
What I'm saying is if you later someone says, hey, we think something bad happened.
Right.
Now all of a sudden the thing that you did.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Something much of it is.
Oh, so it's the traveling part.
Yes, the traveling part.
It's kind of funny if you think about it.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
I'm trying to do something nice.
Yeah.
And all of a sudden it's like now it's.
Even the nice stuff I did. Yeah. So it's like that's what I'm saying. It's like now even the nice stuff i did yeah so it's
like that's what i'm saying it's like that's one of those ones like retrospectively it's like
basically inviting someone to a party yeah you know these rich dudes they fly to parties
that's what i'm saying yeah yeah and group of girls he's like who wants to go they all jump on
you go south like you're human trafficking he's like i was going anyway these hot bitches jumped
on yeah okay there is that but then there are also people who are just like i mean i heard that He goes south. You're human trafficking. He's like, I was going anyway. These hot bitches jumped on the plane.
Yeah, okay.
There is that, but then there are also people who are just like, I mean, I heard that, and
the stories are crazy.
No, stick to it.
But I heard that Diddy blew up Kid Cudi's car.
Yes.
They say he's like a mafioso.
If you've done actual bad, bad shit, then you've got to go.
Yeah, but they're also saying this is another deep dive.
That he's the reason what's going on with Wendy Williams.
There's a conspiracy.
She has a sickness?
We're vibing heavy right now.
I like the vibes today.
That she doesn't really have these illnesses, that he's a part of
it because she was one of the ones that was trying to expose him years ago.
And then he's involved with like taking away her money.
They've been doing this forever to him.
Making her, they've given her like dementia pills to make her like that.
Oh, come on.
Yeah, dude.
But his girl, you know, his girl Cassie,
she was the first one to kick this off.
I know.
And then she asked for, I think, $30 million,
and then they settled.
Right.
Well, the lawsuit was going to be for $30 million.
Listen, in my opinion, there's no way she got $30 million.
Uh-uh.
Not even close to it.
It depends.
She was the main. Colin Kaepernick
sued the NFL.
He's a bad football player.
He sued the NFL because he was being...
You know what, dude? That's a great point.
He really brought up a great point.
It doesn't matter, you know?
It does, though, because he's like,
oh, I'm trying to play, and I'm not on the team
because I'm black.
It's like...
Now what, dude? I'm trying to play, and I'm not on the team because I'm black. It's like, shh.
Now what?
Now what, dude?
I'll take a knee, dude. I'll take a knee.
I'm delirious, and I have a fake finger gun, dude.
Chill out when you're talking about Colin Fapernick.
I swear to God, dude.
Oh, that's the porno version of it.
Fapernick?
Yeah, solo.
Solo.
Fapernick.
Solo video.
Fapernick?
That's his new. That's going to be his new. Colin Fapernick. Because he can't make money. He's now Colin Fapernick. That's his new.
That's going to be his new.
Colin Fapernick.
Because he can't make money.
He's now Colin Fapernick.
No, no.
But what I'm saying is he sued the NFL.
Fapernick was Nick's wrestling name.
Because he.
He's from the ropes.
Oh, shit.
He's from the ropes.
So stupid.
He's got his penis in a penis lock.
Dude, I should be on a fever more often. I don. Dude, I should be on a fever more often.
I don't know.
I should be on a fever more often.
I feel like you're always on a fever.
Yeah.
Yeah, dude.
Now we have to find out what if it's like.
That would suck, but it would be good for the world.
You didn't finish your take on Colin Kaepernick that I want to destroy.
You said it last episode.
No, I didn't.
All I'm just saying is he sued them.
And you would think that a quarterback, if you're suing the NFL because they're taking money out of your pocket,
well, the average quarterback now makes like $35, $40 million.
So he could say like, yo, you took my career away,
so I'm suing you for five years.
He would probably try to sue for $200 million, right?
He got like $3 million.
That's because he ain't shit.
I'm in the wrong business, guys.
What I'm saying is.
Well, they gave him his market value.
Like, you'd be a backup.
You'd come back.
It's that.
He had a case for being like, you didn't let me work.
Oh, he's full of shit.
You know, all I'm saying is like.
Didn't let me work.
I wouldn't be surprised if she only got like two or three million dollars.
Cassie?
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Diddy has a billion dollars.
So?
No, I know.
I know, but I'm saying Diddy.
30 mil is not nothing.
If he was like, if you just shut the fuck. Because I guess apparently she was the main one, the sex trafficking.
She had all the info.
So if she asked for 30 mil, he's like, and you just shut the fuck up because it's either 30 mil or prison for life.
Here's 30 mil, Eric.
I don't think so.
I think he probably called all the people he has stuff on.
Hey, we got to pay her off.
You know what
i'll tell you what's gonna be interesting so what's this shit though what's what i don't get
so people are saying he's the fall guy for the powerful people well that's the internet no what
does that mean it's just like epstein so epstein was recording people there's rumors that pd told
people if you want to be famous, you have to do this.
And he recorded people doing this,
and he had parties, and he has people doing stuff.
So they're saying he's basically the black...
Yeah, yeah, I get it.
I get it, I get it, I get it.
Which is they get all these powerful people,
and they...
Oh, but that's probably not true, right?
Who knows?
You think so?
If we never see him, then we'll know.
Do you see the audio that the guy said
he leaked from the party
where Meek Mill was having sex with P. Diddy?
No.
Let me send it to Nick.
It sounds like him.
I mean, it's got to be.
Dude, after that tweet that he put out.
I was like, oh, he's gay.
That tweet he put out like, you know I like pussy.
You know what I mean?
Nothing more.
Yeah, he's hot.
I like better than pussy.
Let me find it.
Is this it?
You know how I know you're gay?
Maybe.
Yeah.
He's like, take that, take that.
Yeah, take that, take that. You know that's some... First of all, you know that's some guy doing this. Yeah, take that, take that.
You know that some, first of all, you know that some guy doing this.
Oh my God, hit that.
A Foley artist?
Yeah.
We got the best guy in the game.
We're going to pretend to leak the Sean Combs milk shit.
Now I'm, I retired.
Now we need you for one last mission
I said no
what they got your wife
fuck alright I'm coming out of
retirement
he's coming out of retirement to save his wife
give me the fuck give me some water
give me some triscuits
oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah let oh, yeah, oh, yeah.
Let me see Sally.
Let me see Sally.
Come on.
Oh, I need to know proof of life.
I need proof of life.
Dude, the name of this episode is going to be called Fever Dreams.
Yeah.
Oh, Fever Dreams is good.
You guys want some cream cheese?
Nice catch.
Yeah.
I was an athlete in my former years.
Yeah, dude.
Look at what happens with Diddy, though.
It's going to be interesting.
Cassie came on Joe Coy's podcast one time.
This is a personal story.
And she followed me after.
And she didn't follow any of the other production people.
And she only followed like 600 people.
Oh, you thought you had a chance?
That's hilarious.
Yeah, I did.
And I was just like, wait for the perfect time.
And then like six months later, she followed everybody besides some brand deal that she got with.
And there it went.
That's weird.
Damn, man.
There it went.
You had a window, dude.
And I got a lot of miles out of Me and You, her like first video back in the day.
Oh, really?
When I was a young man.
Yeah.
Bim, bum, bum, bum, bim, bim, bum.
But I don't do duets.
Bum, bum, bim, bum, bum, bum, bim, bim. You guys are doing a duet. Yeah, I know. I don't do duets You guys are doing a duet
Yeah I know
I don't do that shit
I always jump in dude
But I don't do duets
I do
I only do duets
So
So who's this
Political
What is this one
Politics
Yeah
They sent me this
Of course they did
They're great though
I love them
You're a fucking bitch
So aggressive
Look at this what you always say
is every time
oh these people are great
I wouldn't wear it
if I didn't think it was good
and he like
you know
they sent it to me
you know
it's great
my boy Tim
this is a friends and family
yeah yeah
he came to the show
and I gave him tickets
and blah blah blah
I love politics dude
they got some cool
I think they're out of Louisiana
they got some cool stores
they got one in New Orleans
they got one in
you know maybe Lafayette or something.
Were you in Lafayette?
But they got a bunch of different ones.
Oh, I saw that documentary you were telling us to watch,
The Quiet On Set.
He was telling us not to watch it.
Yeah, it's tough.
Well, but that means watch it.
Tough, man.
I told you not to watch that goat movie.
You guys didn't.
Yeah, I listened to you.
The lamb? You don't even remember
it but when someone says lamb is it's better it was a lamp but when someone says dude that
documentary is so dark man don't watch i'm like oh no i don't watch i gotta look into it is dark
i didn't finish it because it was like i see i didn't i mean it's bad but i've definitely seen
worse like jeffrey dahmer's docs way worse that's not the point the point is it should have been about the guy that was writing letters to john wayne gacy that's what the documentary should
have been about him like that shit's crazy wild this guy had a painting and he's bringing the
crew over to his place and he's he's like oh this clown painting yeah guess who that's from
and then by his bed he's got letters and he's corresponding with Guess who that's from? And then by his bed, he's got letters
and he's corresponding
with them.
And that's the,
this would be like
doing a documentary
about like Hitler's Gardner.
You know what I mean?
You know what I mean?
And then you're just like,
he was the,
you know.
Hitler's Gardner
sounds like a movie
that Ralph Fiennes
would be in.
So many awards,
you know?
And he's just like this.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know what I mean?
Trim's at my top trims cats are hatches
just yeah all you gotta do is t chris up for uh depressions yeah good dialogue right oh
that's the hatches that quite on the set though the the main guy the guy who created all the shows
yeah i mean he was an asshole he was oh that's my favorite like the hooberman shit that came out
oh the hooberman he was late to dinner and they was an asshole. Oh, that's my favorite. Like the Uberman shit that came out. Oh, the Uberman.
He was late to dinner and they made an article about it.
Yeah.
That was hilarious, dude.
Oh, no.
He's an attractive alpha male with a millionaire.
Dude, they're just writing an article on everybody, bro.
And they always put the fucking face, his face on the cover, and it's shattered.
You know what I mean?
Like they'll have like his face split in half.
But it was shattered.
But it was shattered. They make it shattered always. And then they'll be like his face his picture was good in half but it was shattered but it was shattered they make it shattered always and then they'll be like the
secret life of huberman and then they'll be like yeah he was late to dinner and he said he was
going he didn't go and he's mean bro this is so shitty this is the new york you know it's
but everyone can smell it it's just all bullshit and they just want views because now they all
would we ever talk about the New York Magazine on here?
Ever.
So this is why they do it.
Yeah, true.
But it's going to do nothing to his career.
They got to know that this is bullshit.
He's single, super muscular, and fucks chicks.
Hate this guy.
When I read that, I went, oh, I like this guy.
Yeah, I read the entire thing.
It's so long.
It's so long, bro.
Is there going to be anything in there?
They started saying, oh, Athletic Greens isn't that good, and he promotes it.
All right.
Well, he thinks it is, dude.
Some people love it.
But again, that's like that with that quiet on the sack.
But what I'm saying is being creepy is different from the two actual pedophiles.
The one pedophile was on there with the homeboy Drake.
The guy had to be writing letters to John Wayne Gacy.
Wow.
He was actually writing letters to him?
Yeah, he was corresponding with the guy.
That guy was the worst.
He might be arguably the worst serial killer ever because of his attitude.
Did you listen to the tapes?
Oh, yeah.
I don't miss them.
His tapes are the creepiest shit ever, man.
Who?
John Wayne Gacy?
Yeah.
There's a lot of creepy tapes out there, but yeah.
His shit is like...
Why?
Because of how...
Because he knew exactly what he was doing.
There was no remorse.
Zero remorse.
He was just a narcissistic...
It was craziness.
As opposed to what I'm saying is like... He was the one who had them all in his house? When you hear Dahmer, Dahmer was like a just a narcissistic like it was craziness as opposed to what i'm saying is
like he was the one who had them all in his house dommer dommer was like look man something's wrong
with me you gotta you gotta no he was like you gotta kill me you gotta kill me i don't want to
do that i'm a compulsive like i won't ever stop this guy was like yeah he was the one who put all
the people in his basement right yeah yeah buried in the basement anyway what i'm saying is well
you know i should say be proud of like writing letters to this guy?
You know what I should say, Eric?
That's weird.
It wasn't that, clearly that guy should have lost his job.
But when I go into a documentary, I'm thinking worse though.
They're like, yeah, he was mean to the girls, did this.
I'm like, all right, when does he start fucking the kids?
Like I'm waiting for that.
We're on episode four.
I'm like, all right, this is the last episode.
When does his dick come out?
There's rumors that he, okay, I understand if you're saying –
like if you're saying that's the worst possible thing you can do,
but like even regardless of – if that never happened,
all the environment and things that he set up.
The adult jokes.
I get that with the kids.
But again, like what he did compared to what Homeboy did with that Drake kid is...
That guy only got 16 months.
That's crazy.
How many episodes is this thing?
Four.
And they're putting out a bonus one I just saw.
Oh, wow.
Because it's just so popular.
I know.
What else can we...
But you know the thing about it is that you know who could blow the lid off this and just didn't do anything?
It's Amanda Bynes. Well, she did try to didn't she when she was like oh really well she's
batshit crazy though i know and then we see why but like they asked her to be a part of this
documentary she was like no and then she was like yeah i didn't even watch it no interesting yeah
because i bet she has all this shit that's what i'm saying but like the thing is irion grande
could too but she's like bitch i'm so. There's a rumor that like he got her pregnant and he got a, she got an abortion.
The fat dude got a pregnant?
So there's only 13.
Yeah.
Really?
I mean, it's a, I'm trying to find, confirm, but I, she has a burner that she's been tweeting
and she even tweeted out her license from it and said her family has control of her
actual Twitter account.
And I think she tweeted that she had an abortion.
At 13?
By that guy?
See?
Oh, it's dark.
Well, I told my girl, I said, the first red flag should be that he knows exactly what
8 to 12-year-olds want at all times.
He made like 10 massive hits.
That's a little weird as a grown man.
Boom, red flag right there.
And then when Drake got molested, the worst thing was his dad was Drake.
Drake?
Drake Bell.
Oh, shit.
Not Drake the rapper.
Dude, I need him to keep pumping out hits, bro.
I know.
That's why he pumped out hits.
But Drake's dad was like new right away.
New right away.
He was like, that guy's a fucking creep.
But look at the mom and the kid.
It ruined their relationship.
Because the kid is like 11, 12 years old.
He's making all this money.
And the mom knew something was up.
And the mom's like, no.
She's making a stink about stuff.
And they fired him.
Yeah.
And then he blames the mom.
And he blames the mom.
Yeah, yeah.
You said this last episode.
But the mom's doing the right thing.
Being a child star actor has to be, I mean, name somebody.
I mean, there's a few kids.
You've got to fuck up.
Christina Applegate worked out for Leonardo DiCaprio, I mean. Name somebody. I mean, there's a few kids. Christina Applegate worked out for it.
So Leonardo DiCaprio, I guess.
Although he's.
His mom had hairy armpits.
Ron Howard.
Yeah, Ron Howard.
True.
That worked out.
He wasn't a kid, though.
He wasn't?
I didn't watch it.
Oh, Drew Barrymore.
Ron Howard wasn't.
Oh, you've never seen her show?
Oh, her mind broke.
Oh, her mind broke.
Oh, her mind's broken.
No, it didn't.
She didn't have a mental breakdown.
Her brain went like this.
Well, it can't be good to be that famous when you're that young.
It's just I would never let.
Like, would you let your kids act at seven?
Like be on Nickelodeon?
Let's take a little break, fellas, because I know both of you are just foaming at the wiener.
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Good luck getting those yeezes.
You were kind of a child star.
Me?
Yeah.
I got my first role when I was like 16.
Yeah.
But no, that's not...
16 is better than 8 or 9.
Also, I was in two things.
What were you in?
I remember before Christmas.
No, I was in The Firm with Tom Cruise
and Rainmaker with Christmas? No, I was in The Firm with Tom Cruise and Rainmaker with Vin Diesel.
What do you mean Rainmaker?
I thought he was.
Matt Damon.
God.
Vin Diesel and Rainmaker.
Matt Damon and Jenny DeVito and me.
It was a three-hander.
Yeah, he was a kid actor.
Oh, yeah.
But anyone?
No, I mean.
Yeah, you stupid bitches.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah. Anyway, dude, it was fucking. That's the name Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Anyway, dude, it was fucking...
That's the name of the show, actually.
What was that?
Was it Annie Griffith's show?
Yeah.
Annie Griffith's show, yeah.
I used to love that as a kid.
Guys, come on, man.
But overall, for kid actors, it's a nightmare.
Yeah, dude.
I don't know how you...
They can't be kids.
I don't know how you do it.
I was...
How do you do it now, though?
Imagine all these kid actors that went crazy and there was no internet.
How do they do it now?
Well, the weird thing about now is, and I don't remember who was telling this to me,
or I was talking about this, but kids can see themselves do something immediately.
I record Calvin doing something, and I go, boop, and he says, let me see. Yep, right away. Like, that's really something and I go, boop.
And he says, let me see.
Yep, right away.
Like that's really weird.
Oh, right, right.
You know what I'm saying?
So that alone is not obviously a child star,
but like that's the first time in history
you can do that.
Yeah.
You know?
You used to have to look in a fucking pond
to see yourself.
Yeah.
And now it's like-
A pond.
Well, way back when.
You'd get scared, you'd go, water. There were no mirrors before mirrors. Yeah. And now it's like- A pond. Well, way back when. You'd get scared. You'd go, water.
There were no mirrors before mirrors.
Yeah.
I watched Three Body Problem on Netflix.
I'm sorry.
What word did you just say?
Three Body Problem.
It's called on Netflix.
Is it a documentary?
Nope.
What's it about?
It's about-
It's sci-fi.
I'm out.
I'm in on sci-fi.
I know you are.
That's why I brought it up.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I saw the whole thing.
I'm going to check that out.
I saw the whole thing.
Don't spoil it. I donfi. I know you are. That's why I brought it up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I saw the whole thing. I'm going to check that out. I saw the whole thing.
Don't spoil it.
I don't think I could, honestly.
It's really, really, really involved and really wild and really, really slow and hard to – that's the book.
So a movie – the show would be the thing that you watch, Nick.
I figure they're the same synopsis. Yeah, it doesn't have pages.
But there's nothing popping right now on Netflix.
I mean, obviously, quite on the sets of HBO.
But Netflix is snoozing right now.
Are they?
Some are slapping, daddy.
Some are slaps.
We're all chilling.
There's nothing popping.
There's no good documentaries right now.
Irish Wish, bro.
I saw 10 minutes of that.
What do they got?
Irish Wish.
Lindsay Lohan, child actor.
True.
Damsel.
Oh, dude, I saw maybe 20 minutes of Damsel.
Christ almighty, that's bad.
What else?
Ford vs. Ferrari is fantastic.
It's good.
It's good.
Gentleman was good.
A fun watch, you know?
Homicide in New York, I saw a few of those episodes.
What's hot? The program, cons, cults, kidnapping. kidnapping oh the last airbender got my attention it was all right oh come on
it was so bad i know but it was bad how about the gay one that they try to act like he's not gay
he's so gay yeah but i think that... Can I tell you something?
I think that that show was a victim of probably a low budget and having to go fast.
Oh, yeah.
That makes a lot of sense.
But for kids... Okay.
Is it for kids?
Yeah.
It is?
I think it's fine for kids.
All right.
Because there was a certain moments where I was like, oh, this could be...
This was okay in that last damn render. There was a couple moments where I was like, oh, this could be – this was okay in that last damn render.
There was a couple moments where I was like, oh, I see where they got it.
These guys are okay.
But I have a feeling it was like, moving on.
You know, it was like one take.
Okay, moving on.
And then it was all special effects.
He's acting really gay.
It's like, he's gay then.
Make him gay.
That's me, Monk.
That's me on Monk.
Number six on Netflix.
Oh my God.
Hey, they try to keep me out of Hollywood, bro.
Hey, bro.
He's number six on Netflix. Hey, they try to keep you out of Hollywood, bro. Hey, bro. He's number six on Netflix.
Your episode's better.
Still winning, baby.
Hell yeah, dude.
A group of us killed someone and I spoiled it, but whatever, dude.
I was just going to watch.
That sweater, is that from someone you know?
Nah, nah.
Back then I wasn't getting shit.
You got a long head in that.
Yeah, I had a long head when I was younger.
God damn.
That's Felicia Day.
She's cool.
Man.
Check out the big brain on Brad.
I got to tell you, man.
I had a glow up.
It took you a long time to get here, huh?
There you go, bro.
This guy always says, I used to be good looking, bro.
But now you admitted secretly that I had a glow up.
You are actually really ugly.
There we go.
No, you're better looking now.
I know. I know that. You blossomed. When do you think that happened? admitted secretly that i actually really ugly no there we go no you're better looking i know
i know i know that awesome i'm killing it when do you think that happened because man i know
when it happened when did it happen what year i love it it was like the year was 1997 when i turned
36 37 i just started really popping off in the looks department 36 37 that's a long glow up dog
i wasn't i was i was there's always something sexy
about me but like oh my but when i turned 36 37 i figured out throw that out i figured out i figured
out my angles and i also figured out uh what to do with my body how to move i'm very charismatic
and i may not be conventionally good looking but there is something about me dude that's fair i'll
give you that you know and it's just like You realize you had angles is what it was.
That's all I got, really, honestly.
And, like, you know, I pretend like I'm listening.
And, like, people think that, like, oh, well, what's Chris going to say about that?
And I say it.
And they go, whoa, that's a crazy take.
What the fuck?
You know?
And then I leave the room.
And then they're like, oh, that was weird.
That's interesting.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I got longer hair.
It's not too long, right? Because if you're in your 40s you have too long hair you
gotta cut that shit right but it's nice it's nice it's long enough to where it's okay right and and
i don't i'm not i'm not great people think i dye my hair why would i dye my hair if i didn't dye
my beard my beard's gray i'm leaving it dude i've never dyed my hair once isn't that amazing
he's just talking to himself and answering dude no one said a word for the last
20 minutes so you should just cut to me like this is that amazing though it's really amazing when
you really really all from felicity no no monk monk felicity remember that show that show fucking
blew the doors off that fucking cw or whatever there's nothing to look forward to
movie why i guess beetlejuice oh dude i'll tell you what man man i'm tired of remakes man well
no this is part two yeah beetle it's a remake beetlejuice after this after this long it has
our girl from wednesday in it oh yeah she's good y'all are stupid they're getting they're getting
on her because she's in this movie where she's like you know has like she's like 18 and there's
like some professor in it and they have
like a sex scene and they're just like
non-stop getting on her about this.
That's the script.
I can't wait. I'll dress up for that.
Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice.
Michael Keaton is
such, he's so
awesome. I agree.
He was great in Flash even though that
movie was terrible. I refused to see it.
What happened to that kid?
I saw it.
Wasn't that kid going crazy?
Childhood actor going crazy?
You think he was the best Batman?
Michael Keaton?
It depends.
If you're talking about most watchable, yeah, for sure.
I never liked Beetlejuice as Batman.
That's all I could see was Beetlejuice.
Me too.
And the other thing, too small.
Yeah.
Well, but that was back then
When you didn't have to be
No back then
I was eight
When I went too small
Yeah okay
Well I mean look
He was
I was his size at eight
Yeah yeah yeah
And I went too small
Batman should be jacked and swole
I think
To me
My favorite Batman is
Christian Bale
Is Ben Affleck
I think that's
He's good
I think he's doing
What he's doing as this like
Aged Batman
I really liked it
the only one that
to me wasn't
really good
honestly
was
George Clooney
oh that was
oh my god
oh those are my favorite
it was terrible
those are the worst
oh no I liked those
look they went for
a different thing
they wanted to make it
more cartoony
and I appreciate
Jim Carrey was in it
and shit
and like
Joe Schumacher
everybody freeze I know but Joe Schumacher. Joe Schumacher. Everybody freeze.
I know, but Joe Schumacher did.
He put nipples on the bat suit.
Adam West was another guest. He's the best.
He's the legend.
You can't judge anything from the 60s.
I watch those with my kids now.
They love them.
Pew.
Pow.
Swing.
They're funny.
Most people like him the best.
Most people like him the best.
Yeah, he's the voice of it.
Yeah, but they think he's the best.
Okay, well, he was just the voice.
What's half the gig?
It's not half it.
People love him.
No, dude, he's cute.
On Cameo, this guy is fucking million.
He's usually online number one.
Guys, on Cameo, this guy's amazing.
I saw his Cameos.
He'll do like four-minute Cameos.
No, he's dead.
Oh, well, then he just died.
No, he did a year ago.
Oh, wow. Is that just dying? Yeah, well, no, he's dead. Oh, well, then he just died. Yeah. No, he did. A year ago. Oh, wow.
Is that just dying?
Yeah, well, no, since cameo.
I just want everybody right.
You want everyone to be... Right.
Yeah, just calm down, dude. We're both
right. You said he
just died, and I said he died a while ago.
Happy birthday,
Kevin Chafe. This is
Batman calling you from the library of Wayne Manor.
Koichi Sato wanted me to send you this message.
How long is it?
So this is just four minutes?
That's crazy, bro.
I am vengeance. I am the night. I am back.
Happy birthday.
My shit's like this.
Why do people love smoothies?
My shit's like this. My shit's like this.
My shit's like this.
Boop. Boop.
So stupid.
No, I do it.
And the person with another line is like this.
$11,000?
You paid for that?
Bro, wait, hold on.
I did a...
You still do them?
Yeah, sometimes if I pop up, yeah.
I've tried to price myself out so I don't have to do them, you know,
but I didn't know there were business
Cameos
That they could do
And I got one
And it was for
First of all it said
$2,000 cameo
I'm like $2,000 what the fuck is this
And it was like
For a business cameo
It was for the
Foreskin
Some movement That was trying to make the four
like foreskin matters kind of thing where it's like do you don't cut the foreskin for on babies
and they wanted me to be uh like hey guys you know no just to do a video and they were gonna
play at their event and i was like like, I'm not doing that.
Well, that's what happened to Brett Favre.
Brett Favre did a $500 cameo for some company,
and he was just reading the stuff,
and he didn't realize they were some right-wing racist organization
or something like that.
I don't know.
So he was like, you don't know because you're like,
oh, okay, what do you want me to read?
Right.
That's why I'm very careful now.
John Cameo too? Yeah. I was like, what are you making me say?
Like, no. No, yeah. If I can't make sense
of it, I don't do it. Or sometimes I just don't want to.
But anyway, so I was like, for $2,000, I was like, nah.
So I put my business price up to $10,000.
So if you want me to say something for your business,
price just went up. You could thank the foreskin
for that, honestly.
Their search sucks. You'd be getting
hit up more, but you'd have to put in the apostrophe.
Oh wow, that's trouble.
I gotta talk to him about that.
That is pretty bad.
Or just change your name to that.
And is Cameo still a big thing?
Is Cameo still a big thing?
Yeah.
It's still popping?
There's so many of them, it's crazy.
There's this one that my boy Vince and Oshana, they do.
It's called Minect, or I think it's called.
But this one is like, you would never do this one, Chris, because you can get called.
Oh, God.
You can set up a phone call, and they ask you for advice and stuff like that.
Right.
That's wild.
People are doing it for Chris Hansen.
You could do personal yeashes.
You could.
Oh, yeah.
But they got people that-
On a video call, they show you shoes and you go, let me see.
Yeesh.
Yeah.
They got people that are big on cameo, though.
It's really weird.
They have cameo guys.
They just have a big following cameo?
Yeah.
The girl from-
But they came from someplace.
Love is blind.
Who's that?
Look at that person.
Who the fuck is that?
Is it someone's aunt?
She's been in some movies
that I'm sure you know.
Oh, did you see
The Love is Blind
like where you
the end?
Yeah.
Oh, that shit was crazy.
Bro, that show sucks.
Yeah.
That show sucks.
I enjoy it
until it gets later in the game.
James Buckley
he makes one million?
No, when they start knowing each other,
when they start actually living together,
you see like...
It starts getting real.
It gets real.
Carol Baskins is getting $120,000.
For what?
Oh, I would do a cameo with her.
For what?
I'd pay for a cameo.
Getting $120,000 for what?
You can't just say that.
For what?
It was right there.
For a cameo.
She won the cameo. Whoa, whoa. what? You can't just say that. For what? It was right there for a cameo. She won the cameo.
Whoa, whoa.
We're looking at the thing.
Hey, fever boy.
Well, you know, it's like.
You're in a fever pitch right now.
You know what it's like.
It's Bruce Buffer.
Of course.
Yeah, guys who have the voice guys make a lot, you know.
Or something specific, you know what I mean?
Frank the Tank from Barstool.
He was like, that's what I was trying to find.
He was like number one for like 37 weeks straight.
He's just a big, fat New York Mets fan.
That's because Barstool has such a massive fan base.
Yeah, they sure do.
And he's like known for his rants.
Well, you also can't – if you like – he's probably also publicized probably on his Twitter, his Instagram, all this kind of stuff.
They're letting people know, I'm on Cameo, I i'm on cameo yeah i mean the ones i get are all
the same it's always like oh man my my girl's a huge workaholics man it's her birthday can you
do that thing you did on the show it's the it's always that it's just always me i would get on i
don't think i made you know white people loves movies or you know something about you know
strange do you make decent money on it?
What's decent?
You know what I mean?
Do you make more than $1,000?
I've made, since I've been doing it,
I've probably made like $14,000 altogether.
Okay, Chris.
Oh my God.
I don't like fever, Chris.
Your usual charm on your asshole-ness makes it like, oh, that's endearing.
Now the fever has taken all that away.
Now you're just an asshole.
It's 14 bad, Chris.
I don't know how it works.
That's it.
You know.
Why are you doing that?
Why are you teeing them up to be here it's good i don't know
i'm proud of you how long you been on there four years
uh uh yeah no i don't know
i just fourteen thousand dollars and you know i don't know how many years. That's good. I'm so done with you.
What's this, Nick?
We got a lot of yeesh's, but one guy wanted to respond on the need for speed yeesh's. Oh, were we clowning his bad shoes?
They were so bad.
One yeesh.
One goddamn yeesh?
Chris, you really didn't like my need for speed Pumas.
In fact, I think you called them the worst shoe
you've ever seen in your life.
It's funny the cop car. In particular, you didn't
like the seatbelt feature.
Would you say it's a fair statement to make
that you think
car parts adapted for a shoe is a
dumb idea?
You're trying to trick me. That's interesting.
That's very interesting, Chris,
because I did a little digging
and I found this.
Collaborations are
great.
I love how
they have a little spoiler on the back.
He slowed it down.
It's a joke.
I'm making a joke.
He didn't get me.
Got you.
Look at him.
It's a joke.
You're an online hypocrite.
You think you're down for us?
Bro, you're not that fast.
Well, that's true.
What's next, a freaking muffler?
Imagine.
Actually, that'd be pretty dope.
I like this guy.
Yeah, he's funny.
I like these shoes because, well, I agree.
They are one yeesh, or I could see why you'd give them that.
But I like stupid shit, and these are pretty stupid and weird, and or I could see why you'd give them that. But I like stupid
shit, and these are pretty stupid
and weird, and I like that. I like this guy a lot. It's cool.
Also, they were $30 on clearance, probably
because no one wanted them.
But at least the seatbelt kind of makes sense.
You know, it locks the foot in,
it secures the foot. It sort of makes sense.
A spoiler, though?
Come on, bro. That's just stupid. I go really fast.
Alright, just wanted to call
You a joke
On this bullshit
I called it a spoiler
As a joke
Dude
These are my favorite
This is my
So this
Those are up there
Is my favorite shoe
Is that a five inch
Yeah
And I don't know
About the colorway
But that
No no
The colorway is good
It's great
But like
The five out of five
Is right here
The first wave runners
Those are great Not first But yeah the first wave runners. Those are great.
Not first, but yeah, the first wave runners.
Yeah, those are great.
Uh-uh.
Yeah.
That's five.
And it's really hard to do it coming off a fever.
Those are really good.
Did you put your own laces in them?
Yeah.
They look good, but you know I'm not a fan of that.
But I do like that.
They look good.
You would give it a five because I put my own lace.
You gave it a four?
You guys, we had to get the Yeesh merch. Yeesh!
Yeesh!
There you go. Bless you.
What else you got, Nick?
That feels like it. No, we got
a way to go. I think that we only did it for
like 30 minutes. Yeah, your fever is really getting to the hole.
Dude, how fucking...
We're slowing time down.
I knew I was going to be delirious today, dude.
And I'll tell you what, man.
Thank God it's great for the podcast.
Subscribe to my Patreon and congratulations.
I'm disrespectful.
I'm disrespectful.
Will you blow your nose at the dinner table?
No, I don't think I would do that.
If you have to, you have to.
That's what I say.
My mom gets so mad, so does my brother.
You go like this.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Right?
You don't do it on the turkey.
Ooh, five yeeches.
Who's doing it on the turkey?
Is that Kristen?
Oh, my bad.
My bad.
There is a follow-up from her husband after this.
That's Kristen. No, it's not. Hi, guys from her husband after this. That's Kristen.
No, it's not.
Hi, guys.
My name's Taylor.
That's not.
Taylor is Kristen's last name.
What the fuck is going on here, guys?
And I thought it was in your bands.
And I have the same bloody guts.
What the fuck?
Oh, shit.
I got red inside.
Dude, play a little more of this.
I think this is my wife.
My husband trapped me.
Why is she wearing what Luke Perry wore in 90210?
We're big fans.
My question is in regards to your wives.
I am almost 37 weeks pregnant with my second,
and I keep getting comments mostly from men or from women that have not had kids yet
about how, like, large my belly is and
when's the due date and oh my gosh are they coming today and um it actually makes in a situation
where you're already a little bit on edge and not sleeping great worse and so i guess i'm wondering
i'm sure you were all super supportive of your wives but did you know not to say anything would
you know now like don't
say anything to a pregnant woman um yeah what are your thoughts i the worst is when they go you're
about to pop everyone says that oh is that her that's you're about wait wait i've seen him before
i've never seen her because he called into the show but i've never seen her yeah she was calling
because that's her husband oh i thought it was a repeat or something uh follow up to what was he saying uh
no this is a new one he's talking about what she just sent in okay what's up fellas i'm the husband
travis so i wanted my wife to ask you guys for a spin move she didn't give an example so in the
grocery store the other day she was in line checking out and like she said four or five
people back this older lady says
Oh my gosh
Your belly's so big
What do you do?
She's like soon
And then she's like
Oh it looks like you're gonna pop today
I was like you need a spin move
So that's why I wanted her to reach out
So hook us up with some good spin moves
Thanks for the show
So you submitted for this?
Yep
Like how to like reverse it
A lifeline is
We do spin moves
It's like
Well now it's our thing
Well Listen man Please dude No Don't take it if it's on air hey spin move oh fuck spin move
should when they go man you get big when you do should go i'm not pregnant and walk away i'm just
a fat person i say that i used to say i was like no she's just fat yeah and then we just turn away
yeah um so so those are two different,
well, those are not two different ones.
Yeah, I guess.
Spin moves for me will make those comments.
What would you say when you said?
Yeah.
She's not pregnant.
Yeah, that's hilarious.
I mean, that's so funny.
It is.
To be like, I'm not pregnant, dude.
And there you go.
Oh, I'm so sorry.
Have a good day.
I have a big belly.
As a husband, you have to go,
you have to go, oh, I'm so sorry. Have a good day. I have a big belly. As a husband, you have to go, you have to go,
she's not pregnant.
I'm like, can I talk to you for a second?
She's not pregnant.
Okay?
Now buy all of our groceries.
And we're having an issue about her weight
and thanks for bringing that up.
She's on Theranos.
We're having an issue about her weight
and we're also having an issue getting pregnant.
You're a really horrible person.
Thank you.
You've ruined her day.
She's on some thyroid medication
and it's really dangerous. She's put a lot of weight on. Yeah. She's on some thyroid medication, and it's really gained weight.
She's put a lot of weight on.
She's got that thing that Ethiopian kids get when they don't eat.
Wow.
She's a white person.
Remember those commercials back in the day?
Where they're skinny but big bellies?
She has the same condition.
It's that.
What's it called?
I don't know.
I don't ever say anything if someone is pregnant.
Period. I don't ever say anything if someone is pregnant, period.
There's somebody at my gym that was very pregnant,
and I've seen her from not pregnant to pregnant.
Right, right, right.
So I eventually said, hey, you're a – what did I say?
You're about to pop. No, I didn't say that.
I said, any minute now something
like that you know standard and she said and she said uh yeah a few weeks out and i was like oh
shit it's been that long like i didn't know but so i waited a long time the other thing too is that
you saw her at a place where normally people don't get fat you know what i mean but you know
what i mean so it's like a safe zone it zone. It's not like you start at the coffee bean you go to all the time,
and then you're like, ooh, this bitch needs to stop getting muffins.
No, you start at a place where normally people get skinny,
so then you know, well, she must be pregnant.
So that's like, I think you have the perfect out.
You might be pregnant if you're in line.
So I don't know.
I mean, I feel like I I know you know what I've noticed
when you notice it now
when you're in the thick of it
you might be like
oh I know what stage you're at
that's what I
what I would say like
I'd be like
are you not
how's your sleep
are you doing okay
I'd say nothing
you're almost there
giving encouragement
I'd say nothing
that's what I do
if I make a mistake
I say hey
I say oh wow
you're pregnant
and then they say
oh my god
no I'm not
I go like this
yes you are like I go like this.
Yes, you are.
Like, I know.
Like, I know from the otherworldly shit.
Like, go get checked.
This way I get out of that situation.
She's like, go get checked.
She's not pregnant.
She's like, oh, that guy was an asshole.
She's like, oh, that guy's autistic.
Yeah.
Hey, yes, you are.
So dumb.
You just fly away.
I'll tell you what, nothing makes me, I don't know why,
nothing makes me happier when I see kids.
I'll go, what is he, two?
They go, he is.
I'm like, yeah, I know.
18 months, he is.
Fuck yeah, bitch.
I fucking called it.
You'd be good at a carnival, dude.
I dominate.
Give away no.
What is he?
Just under three? She goes, how do you know? I got three, dude. Give away. I dominate. Give away. No. What is he? Just under three?
She goes, how do you know?
I got three, right?
Don't be an idiot.
I, yeah, I don't know.
Oh, what do you guys think of this?
There's this thing about they're going to, in Florida, they just passed a law.
Yeah, great.
Love it.
Love it.
DeSantis 2024.
I think it should wait until, I think it should be 30.
I agree with that. Nobody should get social media until they're 30.
Well, you know, I saw, but you know, you have this thing about parental rights.
People are like, you know, there's enough studies to know the harms.
Yeah, it's terrible.
Of social media on kids.
At this point now, so it's like, why are we still beta testing?
Why is it just Florida?
You know what I mean?
Why are we still beta testing?
But think about TikTok.
In China, their TikTok is completely different.
Ours is like kids dancing, showing their dicks, doing their thing, stupid trends.
Theirs is like educational, martial arts, sports.
Come on.
Tango and cash clips.
And then after 6 p.m., you can't get on it.
How much do Chinese people love tango and cash?
Well, then I'm Chinese.
I love it too, but I'm just saying.
I can't believe all the shit you clown us about what we watch.
And Tango and Cash.
I don't see you as a Tango and Cash guy.
I grew up on it, man.
Well.
I tried building the same vehicle in that movie.
Kurt Russell's Sylvester Stallone.
Sylvester's sister.
Holler.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
She's not a shoe, bro.
Who played her sister?
His sister.
Some beautiful angel
I don't remember
oh that's when
I was always upset
that they never made another one
me too
it felt like it could have been a franchise
all day
let me tell you something
all day
oh I see
but they'll do it now
that's what they do now
they'll be like untouchables
the second they remake this movie
oh it was Terry Hatcher
it was
the second they remake this movie
they're done with remakes
you know
they're not gonna be done with remakes dude they're still with remakes. They're not going to be done with remakes, dude.
They're still making remakes.
They're still making sequels 40 years later.
Having a Beetlejuice sequel is crazy to me.
Just take these same actors and come up with something new.
What are we doing?
Beetle food?
Beetle food.
Beetle milk.
Beetle milk.
Beetle milk.
You're one of those guys that say milk instead of milk? Yeah, I milk no milk you're about to do happy soda or pop i call it soda
hey soda i'm i'm from fucking the east coast you know what i mean i don't happy gilmore sequel
oh christopher mc Christopher McDonald's fucking awesome, dude.
I don't know.
I think.
I saw a good tweet.
It said, hey, Hollywood, instead of just remaking good movies,
why don't you take the scripts from really shitty movies that have good
scripts and make them and redo those?
Yeah, I agree.
Because there's some really bad movies, but the scripts were good.
They were just bad. I agree. Redo those. Not bad movies, but the scripts were just bad.
I agree.
Redo those, not the classics.
You didn't like that?
No.
Nick, shut the fuck up.
You didn't like that?
His favorite movie of all time.
What else you got, Nicholas?
I just picked a movie.
I didn't even see it.
It's pretty good.
A lot of chicks today.
That's rare for us.
Hey, Golden Hour crew.
This is Laura from Ottawa.
Chris, I saw you here in September,
and it was easily the most embarrassing night of my life.
I made a fool of myself.
I was so starstruck and so nervous.
And then I got posted on your tour report,
and the comments were awful.
That's okay.
Oh, she's sweet.
Don't read the comments, girl.
So that is my question.
What do you guys do in the comment section?
I have a feeling y'all don't read it very much.
However, I find that it would be very addicting with the good and the bad.
Yeah, it is.
It's a tough balance.
How do you guys navigate that, really? That's a good question. Because I believe in all the good and the bad. How do you guys navigate that?
Because I believe
in all the good comments and I
really fight people
with the bad comments.
Anyway, I love you guys.
It has to be tough for someone like her too because we're conditioned
to it because we signed up for it.
For her to get on there
and she's like, whoa. She posts
really just for friends and family.
No one's hating on her.
Not everybody's built for it,
man.
Even the most
celebrity celebrities.
Not everyone's built for it.
Yeah,
you don't look,
but even the good ones,
you don't.
This is it.
Yeah,
I remember her.
Yeah.
Go ahead.
You can play it.
The one chick actually
has her ex-boyfriend
chained up in the basement.
That one fan was straight up in heat for Chris.
I just feel like the good ones and the bad ones,
you can't hang a hat on either of them, you know?
It's just like people are going to love you and they're going to hate you,
and you've got to know this is the truth, bro.
I said to my wife the other day, I was like, dude, some days I'm in such to my wife the other day i was like dude some days i get i'm in such a good mood then i'm
in such a bad mood then i'm such a good mood what is it she's like well dude for so long you've been
um you've been uh getting your self-worth from what other people tell you and you're trying to
figure out how to get it from within yourself and and that's not a bad thing and i was like
your wife said this my wife wow and i was like you're right pay her
i know and i was like and and and and she's right and and that i keep thinking about that
well think about she's good like first of all i've said this before and i'll say it again
your fans for the most part they don't want to deal with that comment bullshit. They're not going to argue. They don't want to be in the public.
They don't want backlash.
And they don't want to be attacked by this.
There's a few trolls that are, like, always on our golden hour thing
that is just constantly, the guy's constantly attacking me.
Really?
Yeah.
And then when you see your name pop up, like, at Eric,
you're like, oh, what's that?
And it's just constantly, constantly.
So it's like I go, I know that when i'm out on the in the other places the people are like hey man love the show you guys are great thanks for coming and then i've said in
the past again well how come you're not on the why don't you ever say anything and they always say
the same thing i don't want to be involved in that so it's like people like that they need it
like i don't know what that is it's all they have yeah the negative that's the thing you should like it's just them projecting like how shitty their life is oh my god so part of
me feels bad for him most of the time i always like it's like listen i have a beautiful wife
i have a son now i i've had a great career i don't have to work it's like slight flex
no but what i'm saying is i'm exhausted he's. He's on Cameo. Yeah, I'm on Cameo.
I made $14,000.
We're going to discuss this later.
Fuck you, bitch.
No, what I'm saying though is like when I see that, I'm built for it because I don't really care.
I don't block people.
I let this idiot go on and on and on like when they go to my other stuff And I just go okay you know
Yeah but did you have to get there
Yeah me too
You have to get there because you realize oh this is never gonna stop
There's nothing you can do
And then forever I didn't even control my own thing
And now I do
And I'll reply to someone
Especially if it's a car thing
It's not even a built motor
And I'll be like yeah it actually has this this and this And then of course the trolls like oh i thought you don't read comments
that was posting ghosts i'm like bitch that was last year i know but keep up the thing too was
like get off my nuts there is sometimes there's a nice comment somebody's like this or you're
engaged in like a good conversation or logistics i mean sometimes people be like hey when's the
show right right right so the thing the problem is, though, is like –
It says on the fucking flyer, asshole.
That's his comment.
It's in the same place.
So this one comment is like, hey, Brandon, what's up with the engine?
And then underneath that, it's like, you should be killed and you're – blah, blah, blah.
Right, right.
And that's me.
And that's me.
So then you're just kind of like, god damn it.
Do I even want to look at this?
So what I don't like about it is you have to like –
I hate that you have to like get your armor on just to like open up the comments section.
Imagine being 14.
No, bro.
I think it should be older.
I don't think –
Yeah.
Maybe it should be too that if like anybody under 18, you don't get comments.
That's a good idea.
Like you can't turn on the comments until you're a certain age.
But it's like, if I'm a grown
ass man, if I'm a
grown ass man, and then whatever this
hater idiot
for our podcast is always coming at me,
if I'm a grown ass man and it even
bothers me just a little bit,
imagine a 13 year old girl.
Yeah. Or a 14, you know,
some young kid who has to deal with that.
And then the thing, too, is remember being bullied at school?
So imagine you being bullied at school.
Then those people take the bullying home.
I handled my business.
No, you didn't.
We saw what you looked like.
I got bullied.
Pull up the Felicity Hammond picture.
That guy got bullied.
I got bullied.
But to your point, that's also like when we were in school back in the 40s, you'd go to school.
There'd be whatever bully fight.
You'd go home.
You'd have to deal with it.
It's a break from that.
Now kids get it 24-7.
That's what I'm saying.
But that's also why suicide is the highest it's ever been.
Yeah, but it's like the thing is like what always gets me is like what do they think is going to happen?
Like my favorite comment when I first started doing this podcast, when it was just King
and his thing, was always like, how do you think you could take Theo's place?
And I'd be like, Theo asked me to do this podcast.
He asked me to come and do it.
He moved.
And then he was like, Eric, can you do this thing?
And then their perception of it, and just the constant negativity. At first was like oh wow this is gonna be tough it goes away yeah you just go
no no it doesn't go away you just don't yeah you just go ah you realize how much it goes away
because eventually well no they figure it out because there's I'm sure there's no comments like
I can't believe Eric took Theo's spot after three years you're gonna be like all right bro
even the haters like we gotta move on to something else yeah yeah this is clearly not I can't believe Eric took Theo's spot after three years. At this point, I'd be like, all right, bro.
Even the haters are like, we got to move on to something else.
This is clearly not bad.
Sometimes – what I'm saying is like you just go – sometimes if you look at them and you'll see a comment, you just go, I wonder – I always think – I wonder is this person just saying this to get a rise out of you or do they really think these things?
You know what I mean? Bro i it's such a weird balance i
wonder this was years ago but i i saw somebody say something to me negative on one of the things
and there's so many i don't know and i was like it had his um his instagram attached to it so i
was like this motherfucker let me go see who this is. I go look.
I look in our DMs.
The dude's a fucking fan.
Yep, I've had that happen.
He's like, I love you, bro.
You're so, he's like, you know.
But did you respond?
No, I never responded.
I never asked what happened.
Well, I don't know.
Because they go,
he's not responding to me giving him love.
If I go bad, maybe I see it.
And when he acknowledged it,
he'd be like, oh, what's up, bro?
Love you, man. Like, then why'd you say you want to kill me it's a crazy uh it's not a good way
to communicate it's a crazy my thing is when someone says something like horrific right and
then i'll go to their profile most of the time it's like zero followers like it's some weird
thing but when i click on it's an actual profile it's a dad that's the only time i'll be like bro
saw the comment come on dude yeah i know it's weird and then most time they're like yeah you're so you're right man blah blah i
shouldn't have done that i was like think show your kid this dude like i'm a dad too he's like
yeah it's fucked up i'm like what are you doing you know what i this weird but like there's like
some trolls out there there's like like professional. And then they say these mean things about us, right?
But at least a guy or girl, at least they're like, their name's out there.
I'm this person.
This is my troll channel.
The people that follow that and then they hit me up and they might be like, oh, did you see this?
My question to them would be, are you a fan of that person?
Or are you only a fan of my reaction to that person?
Oh, that's a good question.
What do you think, D?
Yeah.
I think you're thinking about it too much.
No, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
No, no, he's on to something here.
No, because I want to ask,
because it's like,
does this person really have fans?
Because I was gaming,, because it's like, because does this person really have fans? Because, like, I was, like, gaming, and there was this guy, like, so one of the people following me on my gaming, they, like, corresponded with this person, right?
And then the guy kept hitting me up, like, oh, you got to see.
You got to see.
And I'm just like.
They probably just want to be a part of it.
I know, but one thing is, like, why do I need to see?
They want the drama.
I know, but.
They want the back and forth.
It's like Real Housewives of Comedy.
But again, are you a fan of the professional troll or are you a fan of the reaction of the people he's talking about?
Probably that.
You know what I mean?
Maybe a little bit.
If you need that, then I feel like I hate to disappoint you.
But to them, you're a character in a sitcom.
Yeah, yeah.
You're not a real person.
You're a character in a reality. You're not a real person. You're a character in a reality.
You're not a real person.
Like, your kid doesn't matter.
Your income doesn't matter.
You're just a player in this game that they're playing on social media.
You know?
So are you, piece of shit.
No, I'm saying he's got cameo.
His income doesn't matter.
We got cameo.
How much did you make?
Come on.
Just tell us, then.
You want to brag.
You know what, dude?
No, no, tell us.
I would tell you.
Go ahead, go ahead.
Okay, okay.
$16 million.
Could you imagine?
First of all, you wouldn't be here.
Retired.
Yeah, yeah, too.
Well, no, not retired.
You'd still have to work.
But my wife's lifestyle.
But you'd have to.
Last thing on haters, too.
Like, also with haters sorry i had to
cut you off sorry man i don't care well also with haters too no like they're also super fans it's a
weird thing because i have some haters thing and they'll do a thing i forgot about from 2014
i'm like bro you know my career so well. Is that not alarming, Bubba?
That's weird. If somebody continuously hates you, like if the same person says the same thing every time,
Eric Griffin should be removed from this podcast.
They're a fan.
And they do that every single week.
Then I'm like.
He's a fan.
Yeah, thank you.
You're going to watch every single week?
Yeah.
I'm going to watch every week and see if he's still on there.
He's still on there?
Comment.
You watched the whole thing?
He didn't leave, did he?
I don't know.
It's a weird dynamic.
It's still funny.
There's also a lot of mental illness, too.
I know, but even on my gamer fans, I call my fans of my air gruff and gaming,
I call them POSs.
They're pieces of shit.
Oh, well, that's a problem.
You guys are pieces of shit, you know, because it's like,
I always say to them, when I leave this, when I turn this off, I don't care if you live or die.
Oh, I love that.
Wow.
That's great.
You know what I mean?
That's the honest truth.
And you're doing so much growth.
And then I feel like.
Dude, you have to be honest.
Especially after.
Let me tell you something.
You don't know them.
After having a kid.
Yeah.
Oh.
My circle, I realized, oh, I don't have a lot of friends.
You have three friends.
I don't want a lot of friends.
You saw my birthday party.
You have three friends.
I wasn't even there.
Your video was there.
You sent a nice video.
You know what I mean?
Jan's still talking.
But no, when you have kids, your circle gets way too big.
So I realized, I go, when I leave this, I'm like, if you still want to, you think that, I don't care.
Yeah.
Imagine if we listened to, imagine if you listened to the comments and that's how you decided things.
Well, that's the thing.
You have to, you know, it's so, of course, but like, you know, what matters, dude?
I woke up this morning.
Calvin was in the middle of
kristin and i and the first thing he said was he over her first thing he did actually the first
thing he did was he goes like this there was a there are a bunch of christmas things we had
christmas pjs on you know and he goes like this candy cane and i was like yeah there's a candy
cane and he said dad i really really like you and I'm just like I'm good good yeah what do
you need good for the day that's the best comment ever it's live and in person it's the best and
then I said could you leave that under my YouTube channel do you mind posting this just and it just
says it's like it just says Calvin yeah I really really really, really like you. And you say, fuck that.
Some guy next to me, fuck that.
He fell off.
Fuck him.
Under that.
That's how it is, man.
So you just kind of go, I wish there was some sort of like the AI would kick in.
It will.
And it would separate.
Eventually.
These are your negative comments.
These are your positive comments. It will.
Because it already does it in terms of like they know it's a question and that kind of thing.
Right, right, right, right, right. They'll do that. They'll do that. They'll do that. It will do that. Yeah, it will. Because it already does it in terms of like, they know it's a question and that kind of thing. Right, right, right, right, right.
You know, it can...
They'll do that.
They'll do that.
They'll do that.
It will do that.
Yeah.
Bro, they said,
I saw a thing,
I followed this account
on evolving AI
or something like that
and it was like,
it was like,
I started realizing like,
oh wait,
they're just saying shit
to be provocative.
They're like,
in five years,
you'll be able to live,
if you're still alive in five years,
you'll be able to live to be 500.
And I was like,
what?
If that's true?
Yeah.
Oh, God.
You wouldn't be able to do it.
What do we got, Nick?
No, but can I?
Wait, wait.
Can I just say one thing about that?
It would be fine if you can live to be 500 if you were frozen like this.
Well, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I get it.
I'll be 48, you know. Well, yeah, yeah, I get it. I'll be 48.
No, no, no, no.
What I'm saying, though, is if you're 500.
I'm not 48 yet.
You're the same person who's 105?
You see a person 80 and you're like, imagine living 50 more years.
Although I'll tell you this much, it'd be torture.
Look up Ernie Hudson before you play this video.
The golfer?
No, no, no, the Ghostbuster.
He is in his 80s.
But, bro.
I know you don't have those genetics, though.
But even though he's black, that's crazy.
I know black don't crack, but that is crazy.
Look at his arms, bro.
My trainer is like this.
Fuck, I was wrong.
Even still, though.
My trainer is like this.
My trainer is an old guy.
He's Biden's age. That's biden's age that's crazy bro that's crazy sat with him on a flight once talk about ghost
i don't i don't you know what dude it was so long ago i actually don't even remember if we talked
i just know he was on my flight but and he's just yeah he looked nice as shit at least so go ahead
what's this uh brendan is just going re-viral for your TikTok with Bradley Martin when he was saying he thought he could beat up DJ.
I can't find the exact one, but someone stitched it together, and then Mighty Mouse fought this giant brown belt.
Mighty Mouse is?
Yeah, Demetrius Johnson, former UFC champion.
That black guy?
Yeah.
That's Mighty Mouse?
The little guy's Mighty Mouse.
Of course, yeah.
And the big guy's Thanos?
Yes. It's him guy's Thanos? Yes.
This is him beating the brakes off this.
Wow, that is so crazy, dude.
I'm curious why they're brown belts, though.
Why?
I think he just doesn't ever train Gi.
What's going on here?
And you have to follow some sort of rules?
A game to bring the pain.
I just feel like this guy should fall on him.
He tries, and Mighty Mouse elevates him.
Yeah, because Bradley Martin was saying he's so tiny he could beat him.
I was like, ah, Bubba, you can't beat up Mighty Mouse, dude.
And he tapped him.
Yeah.
Wow.
But like if they were in an alley.
It's a little different, but still.
You're talking about might be the greatest fighter of all time? You're saying in an alley. It's a little different, but still. You're talking about it might be the greatest fighter of all time?
You're saying in an alley.
No, yes.
In a confined space that that guy could beat up that big guy.
Yes.
Yeah.
In a confined space.
Yes.
Beat the shit out of him.
Me?
Different story.
I don't think so.
I think with no rules fight, I think that guy could pick him up and go like this.
No, because Mighty Mouse can control him from picking him up.
Everyone tries it with him.
He's seen it 10,000 times.
So that's what every big guy thinks.
It won't happen.
I don't know.
Every big guy.
I'm telling you, everyone in the gym tries to do that.
This reminds me of like Spider-Man versus Hulk.
Who wins?
Hulk had skills, though.
I'm talking about in a big area, Spider-Man could probably win.
That's a very good point.
Hulk had skills.
He's a superhero.
Man, the contempt that you just said.
What argument are we having right now?
Hey, listen.
I'm no fighter.
I don't know.
That fake guy has skills.
But I just feel like when there's no rules, how are people fighting?
These are like rules.
MMA's pretty damn close to it.
Is it?
He's the best ever.
It's, you know, it's, yeah.
If you're kicking in somebody's shins.
But that other dude, but that big dude, was he a?
He was also a brown belt.
He was also a brown belt? He was also a brown belt?
Well, that's crazy then.
Yeah, yeah.
He's also...
That guy's fucking world-class, too.
Yeah, but then why isn't he a black belt?
I don't know why.
I think because they're both in geese,
but a brown belt in gee is pretty damn good.
I know that.
Yeah, that's right.
That's a step before brown belt.
I have a brown belt.
I got it from J. Crew.
There's no red belt, right?
There is a red belt. Nick, you have a brown belt. I got from J. Crew. There's no red belt, right? There is a red belt.
Nick gave a lot to learn.
It's like the Grand Master.
Like, Helio's a red belt.
Yeah.
Like, go show this fight again?
That's pretty wild that that big brown belt can't beat him.
I think concrete would give him a slight better chance.
Yeah, it would.
It would give him a better chance.
A regular fight would give him a better chance.
But this guy, if he knows too much...
Well, first of all, the guy knows stuff.
A big guy like that,
that doesn't know anything,
that doesn't know how to fight?
He's going to get beat up.
Yeah, he's going to get beat up, bro.
This is still...
He can't do that.
That's a trained 280-pound guy.
A big guy that doesn't know anything
can't do that.
No.
He can't control him at all.
Mighty Mouse would get to his back and choke him
unconscious on the street.
Or if he had a sweater on or
a hoodie, he'd choke him out with his hoodie.
He'd get his legs around his neck. That's crazy.
That's crazy.
Leverage.
Just leverage, bro.
Knows the leverage.
Yeah, I mean, they're not
punching each other or anything like that right now.
This is like this.
No, that's not legal, right?
So you're telling me that.
Not in jiu-jitsu.
Yeah, but the thing is, it's hard to land a punch.
But if he's holding him right here, he wouldn't go like this.
Yeah, but he's walking like this, though, dude.
And then come up with the knee.
Yeah.
No, it's other stuff.
I'm just saying in that moment right there, you're saying that he wouldn't slam him in the head,
come up with his knee, choke him out.
I'm talking about a guy, 10,000 hours of people trying to hit him in the head.
Yeah.
And he could arm bar him.
He grabs him, he can arm bar him.
I actually don't know if he tapped him.
I think time ran out.
I'm not sure.
No, no.
There was a choke.
I looked it up, too.
It's like some random.
You must know this.
In the gi, it's something about getting the gi around the neck.
Yeah. He was able to do that.
It's a specific choke, but I'm not sure what it was called.
Whatever.
He obviously won.
It's a lapel choke.
You don't want to have a fight.
Lapel gets inside and chokes him.
And he taps.
Somebody can take your hoodie and fuck out.
In the Hellraiser outfit.
Oh, I got cut.
Is that it, Nick?
Yeah, the Batman outfit would probably get in the way of that.
Oh, that cape
Yeah
That's
It'd be funny
Like Batman chokes
And stuff
The one of like
They find Batman hanging
Cause he like
The grappling hook
His cape got stuck
And he's just like
On the street like this
Like Batman dies
I don't know man
Hulk had skills
That's a legit point right
Yeah that fake guy Was really good Alright Alright kids love ya Hey dude Batman dies. I don't know, man. Hulk had skills. It's a legit point, right?
Yeah, that fake guy was really good.
All right.
All right, kids.
Love you.
Hey, dude.
Wait, hold on.
I'm going to be in frigging Grand Rapids coming up here.
And I'm going to be in Saginaw.
Wait, but oh, North Carolina. And what's the thing with...
I'm going to be in Virginia.
Yeah, go to chrisley.com.
I'll be in North Carolina tomorrow. Where are you going to be in Virginia. Yeah, go to chrisley.com. I'll be in North Carolina tomorrow.
Where are you going to be, Eric?
I'm going to be at the Tulsa Looney Bin.
Okay, let me get it up.
Tulsa Looney Bin, April 5th and 6th.
Then the Desert Ridge Improv, April 19th through the 21st.
Comedy Mothership, April 26th through the 29th.
All right, kids, love you. Hey, April 26th through the 29th. All right, kids.
Love you.
Hey, this is Dr. Drew, and I'd like to invite all of you to subscribe to the Dr. Drew podcast.
We are very proud of what we're doing there at that podcast.
I am interviewing some of the most interesting people you could ever want to talk to.
Just whatever I find fascinating, whether it's a smart person or an expert in a field that I'm interested in, or maybe I'm not even interested in.
I'm only interested because I've heard them speak and become intrigued.
I think you'll be intrigued as well.
We get deep into topics that are quite important to the current age.
Things like cognitive dissonance, cognitive distortions.
How does our mind work?
We talk about everything at the Dr. Drew Podcast that is of real relevance.
We get all the way into deep physics and all sorts of stuff. But trust me, it's all very accessible.
It's very interesting. Headaches. If you're even interested in learning about headaches,
we get there. We go to the interesting topics of the day. Please join us at the Dr. Drew Podcast.
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